#like i have literally no idea what to expect and that's so fun!!
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piastrisun · 2 days ago
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next in line.
pairings: lando norris + verstappen female reader.
summary: your brother announces his first baby, suddenly everyone’s eyes are on you. the teasing starts as harmless fun, but life has other plans.
faceclaim: lila moss.⠀warning: none.
request: for a smau idea, can you do verstappen!reader that just found out that her brother's gonna be a dad and is just excited maybe a reader x lando? and the grid teases her telling her she's next?
notes: so so happy for max, i’m sure he’s gonna be an amazing dad. and to make clear, i do not support kelly’s actions but i respect her as max’s partner and mother of their kid. also, i’m really sorry this took so long, i didn’t had my laptop :( but i do now!
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ynverstappen i’m going to be an aunt, AGAIN!!! congratulations to the best brother in the world and my sister-in-law for blessing us with a tiny human. can’t wait to meet my future favourite little one. 🤍
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username this got me thinking she was expecting as well, the GASP i let out 💀
maxverstappen1 best brother in the world? finally getting the recognition i deserve
username the fact he commented this first, so unserious 😭😭
username1 i was so moved by the caption and now i’m laughing
maxverstappen1 ik houd van je, kleine zus!!! (i love you, little sister)
ynverstappen ik hou altijd van je, you’re going to be an amazing dad!! (i love you too)
username2 FAVES
username3 my most parasocial relationship are them because i feel like they’re my cousins
kellypiquet thank you!! 🥹 baby can’t wait to meet their favourite aunt
ynverstappen stop it i’ll cry
username they’re so sweet with each other
username4 OMG congrats to your family!!! can’t wait to see the cutest baby pics
landonorris i’m next in line to become an uncle
ynverstappen i hope you’re ready for all the babysitting we’ll be doing!!
username5 wait... does this mean lando and yn are next?
username6 imagine the chaos if they had a baby too 😭😭
maxfewtrell chaos? more like pure excellence the world’s not ready
landonorris couldn’t agree more
ynverstappen you’re BANNED from my posts
username7 do you guys think i still have time to reincarnate in that baby?
username8 MOVE, it was my idea first
danielricciardo aunt for now, mum next?
ynverstappen delete this immediately
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YOUR CHATS: MAMMA’S FAVOURITE GROUP.
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ynverstappen added to their story.
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landonorris just say the word babe
ynverstappen STOPPPP
landonorris i meannn, i was already planning our baby names list, but take your time
ynverstappen keep the list, i’m busy trying to decide between napping or rewatch criminal minds
maxverstappen1 we’re just preparing you for the future
ynverstappen future? i was planning on sleeping past 11 AM, thank you very much
ynverstappen but sure, let’s add kids to the list!
victoriaverstappen you’re next! the family is ready for some mini-you
ynverstappen okay that is kinda cute
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YOUR CHATS: TEAM BABY.
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landonorris four years with my person, my best friend, and the love of my life. here’s to many more!! i love youuuuu
tagged ynverstappen
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lnfour nice number that one
ynverstappen beyond grateful for you every single day, love you more than anything!! <3 ♥︎ liked by author
landonorris love youUuUu
maxfewtrell you two have made it 4 years and not killed each other? impressive
ynverstappen jerk, we’re literally the best couple
username SPEAK UR TRUTH 🗣️
username2 seeing you two together makes me believe in love and what
carlossainz55 yeah, how’s that baby talk going?
ynverstappen can we just enjoy the anniversary without being bombarded about children
landonorris hey!! it’s a valid question
sophiekumpen watching you grow together has been such a joy ♥︎ liked by author
landonorris we couldn’t have done it without all your support 🩶
username3 this is the cutest thing i’ve seen all day
username4 sooo, where’s the baby update?
georgerussell63 you better be sending out wedding invites soon... you know i’ll be waiting ♥︎ liked by author
username5 lando liked this omg
username6 OH IM SO EXCITED
maxverstappen1 maybe we can get the baby a matching anniversary onesie
landonorris don’t tempt me!!
username6 you’re worse than the actual mother 😭😭
alex_albon he is and we appreciate it
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landonorris added to their story.
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maxfewtrell she has that pregnancy glow
landonorris she says: fuck off
maxfewtrell so lovely as always 🥰
charles_leclerc is the shrimp carrying a baby shrimp?
landonorris i don’t think so but stay tuned!
charles_leclerc 🫡
ynverstappen shrimp 😭😭 you’re unbelievable
landonorris you’re MY shrimp, tho
ynverstappen i know i love u
landonorris special shrimp
ynverstappen yes
landonorris mama shrimp
ynverstappen too far babe
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ynverstappen added to their story.
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danielricciardo i’m assuming shrimp is code for ‘future mum’ now?
ynverstappen lando’s been calling me shrimp since FOREVER
danielricciardo for obvious reasons, you kinda look like one
ynverstappen you’re relentless
oscarpiastri you can’t escape forever, you know
ynverstappen i can and i WILL
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ynverstappen we <3 new york
tagged landonorris
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alex_albon this feels like a soft launch for a baby announcement
ynverstappen in WHAT world
alex_albon i don’t know, everyone says new york is romantic
ynverstappen no one has EVER said that
carlossainz55 you two look like you’re scouting locations for a babymoon
ynverstappen STOP GIVING HIM IDEAS
landonorris i do like the sound of that ♥︎ liked by author
ynverstappen no you don’t
username she says that and yet likes all the baby related comments 😭😭
landonorris do you think we’ll get a discount if we book the babymoon now? asking for a friend
ynverstappen i’ll throw you in the ocean
username2 LMAOO he’s not even subtle about it
maxfewtrell baby’s first visit to the empire state? 👶🏻
landonorris give us nine months, mate
username3 savannah slow down
username4 y’all are a little too cute and i love it
username5 REAL like those are my parents
oscarpiastri if you name the baby after me i’ll babysit for free. think about it
landonorris oscar norris-verstappen it is!!!
ynverstappen first of all, my last name would go first
ynverstappen second, you were my favourite, oscar
ynverstappen and i remark WERE
oscarpiastri got it miss
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YOUR CHATS: TEAM BABY.
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liked by danielricciardo, ynverstappen and others
lando.jpg muse
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username he has called her his muse a million times and it gets me every time 🥹
ynverstappen love love love ♥︎ liked by author
lando.jpg 🖤
danielricciardo your family portraits are coming along nicely. just missing one thing…
lando.jpg i’ll admit that would make a good christmas card ♥︎ liked by ynverstappen
username2 u don’t even TRY to be subtle, huh? lmaooo
username3 someone pls tell him he’s not slick 😭😭
username4 you two are the cutest
username5 okay dad in training, we see you!!
username6 they can’t escape baby talk even online i’m CRYING
username7 husband AND dad material, i don’t make the rules ♥︎ liked by author
username8 him liking this he’s NOT real
username9 this man is ready, someone call yn
charles_leclerc dog dad today, human dad tomorrow 👀
ynverstappen tomorrow’s a bit ambitious, but thanks for the timeline
username she’s not saying no—
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©⠀piastrisun original work. please don’t translate, claim or repost any of my writing, 25’.
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traveler-at-heart · 18 hours ago
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Doctor's In - Part 13
Summary: Your life in Boston after Wanda.
The air is cold, and just your luck, today you left the car outside of the building’s parking lot.
Maybe it’s not such a bad thing after all, as a cute woman is inspecting the black Corvette, in awe of the elegant and expensive car.
“Want a ride?”
“This yours?” she says, genuinenly fascinated.
“Yeap” you nod. “She’s a beauty, 490-hp 6.2-liter V-8 engine”
Do you know what those words mean? Not at all.
“My father and I used to fix cars. I need to send him a picture. Can I?”
“Sure, go ahead” you smile. “I’ll even take one of you standing next to it”
You pull out your phone.
“Oh, wait, I should have given you mine” the woman says, and you smile.
“Or you could give me your number and I’ll send the pics” you smile at her, offering your phone.
“Very smooth” she blushes, taking it.
“If you wanna talk about smooth, the leather seats are just…”
“Ugh, it’s too cold to take my motorcycle, can you give me a ride to the hospital?” Yelena interrupts, coming out of nowhere as usual.
“Shh, go away” you push her behind you.
“God, we’re gonna be late. Just skip to the part where you lie about texting the girl and get on with it” she mumbles, and luckily only you can hear her.
“Sorry, she’s being annoying” you elbow Yelena’s side. “I’ll send you the pictures, and my offer for a ride still stands”
“Well, alright then. Have fun babysitting” the woman comments, which earns her a glare from the blonde.
“Get in the fucking car” you mutter. “Why can’t you ask your mother for a damn car? She has lots of them”
“Like the one you borrow and use to get phone numbers? I don’t understand why you do it, you never call them”
“It’s not about having a date. It’s just fun to talk to girls. I never really did it outside of college” you shrug your shoulders.
You never call them because the thought of being with someone who isn’t Wanda is simply absurd.
But you don’t expect Yelena to understand it.
“I never ask for a car because then she’d be like See, I was right, a motorcycle was a bad idea”
“Get both, like your sister”
“No, because then she’ll say I’m copying her, like when she went to school with a green backpack and I got one that was similar the next day. But green has always been my favorite color” she rambles.
“Are all the Romanoffs this complicated?”
"Is your music taste always this random?" Yelena points at the screen. "Yesterday it was ABBA and now it's Metallica"
"Don't even think about changing it" you say, slapping her hand away.
You finally get to the hospital, parking in your spot, which is one of the best ones in the entire facility.
Melina is trying to convince you to stay beyond your three month contract, and she’s not shying away from providing a life of luxury, with a penthouse and a fancy car included.
If it wasn’t because you’re busting your ass in the ER, you’d feel like a sugar baby.
“Go and check on the people waiting, I have to sign discharges and look at some post ops” you tell Yelena as soon as you walk in, and she nods.
“Morning, everyone” you greet the front desk. “Is Patrick ready for his recital today?”
“Yes, he’s very excited” Nurse Roman says.
“Well, as a doctor I don’t feel comfortable saying break a leg, so let’s just leave it at good luck”
“That sounds perfect to me, Doctor Y/L/N, thank you” the woman says. You’re smiling until you notice the frown on Peña’s face.
“Don’t look at me like that. Not my fault you keep betting on Shelton when he’s literally playing against Alcaraz”
“Shelton is the future of American tennis”
“I’m sorry, I can’t hear you over the resounding noise of your debt” you say, going back to the charts but keeping your palm open. You don’t look up until he gives up, putting a 20 in your hand. “Pleasure doing business with you, Peña. I’m so looking forward to Indian Wells and Miami back to back”
You don’t realise that Natasha is also at the front desk, signing a couple of discharge forms.
It’s been a month and you’re already friends with half the people who work here. Natasha’s glad, because it can be miserable to be isolated while you’re away from home.
The other side of her can’t help but feel really stupid too, because all this time she thought you were flirting and in reality, this is who you are with most people.
Now that’s a fast way to humble someone.
“Hi, Doctor Romanoff” you say, finally noticing her. “Ending your shift?”
“Yeah. How about you?”
“Starting a 48”
“Didn’t you just do one 12 hours ago?” she says.
“Yeah, but my brother and sister are coming over so I need the weekend off” you smile, actually excited. Natasha is probably one of the only people who could understand how good it is to reconnect with your siblings, but she’s been distant with you ever since you came to Boston.
So, you wish her a good day, and walk to the madness of the ER.
“Fuck my life, fuck it hard” you mutter when you notice who’s there. Ed Lorne, aka clown nurse. He’s a young one, practically fresh out of college and with an unhealthy obsession to behave like Patch Adams in that movie that always puts you to sleep (No disrespect to Robin Williams).
“Please tell me his shift is almost over” you plead to Yelena.
“Don’t be mean. He’s trying to make an impression”
“He already did and it’s a fucking awful one”
The fact that there’s no swear jar around has turned you into a sailor on leave. Not that you keep track, but if the twins could hear you, they’d be set for an Ivy League education.
Stop thinking about this, you mentally scold yourself, trying to breathe to settle that uncomfortable feeling at the pit of your stomach.
Yelena mistakes your frustrated sigh with a protest as Ed approaches you. Truthfully, it’s a bit of both.
“Top of the morning to you, Doctor Y/L/N” he says, removing an imaginary hat.
God, you’re gonna strangle him with a stethoscope.
“Guy in bed six has problems with urinating and I’m like well, more like ur-out of my bladder!”
“Boy, you’re really bringing the theater kid energy today, aren’t ya” you complain, ignoring Yelena’s smack on your arm.
“Why, thank you for noticing”
“No, that wasn’t a compliment. Check all of my post ops and medication, then fill out the medical records in the computer”
That should keep him busy for the next two hours and away from you.
“Evil” Yelena mumbles, but she’s laughing along.
You take care of a few people, ordering lab tests and other stuff that is quickly taken care of by the staff. It’s nice to have an ER that is never short on medical personnel.
You finish your exam on a patient just in time to get your daily call.
“Hello, Judas”
“Darcy!” you say, always with the same enthusiasm.
“I hate you” she repeats, every day since you left. Well, minus the first week. You didn’t have a phone at all. “Carol hates you too and you’re no longer invited to her wedding”
You can faintly hear Carol’s voice in the background, shouting that what Darcy’s saying is not true.
“I’m trying to get her to come back” Darcy explains. “Look pal, it’s either the good way or the bad way aka getting you in the Psych ward until you go back to your senses”
“I don’t suppose you could get my stuff and send it over?”
“No, for two reasons. One, if I see Wanda I’m going to kill her and dos, you belong here. So it would be stupid to send stuff that you’ll need when you’re back. Besides, how do you know Wanda didn’t throw them away?”
“I just do. Ok, it was nice being emotionally manipulated by you, but I gotta scrub in. Same time on Monday? Remember I’m seeing Zach and Jenny this weekend”
“Yes, get me all the deets on the gossip and yes, same time”
“Love you, pal”
“Screw you”
Darcy hangs up, but stares at her phone for a moment longer. She does miss you and even if she’s giving you shit for it, she understands where you’re coming from.
“Are these the CVs for Chief Fury?”
“Yes” his secretary says, carrying a couple of files. “He doesn’t like to read on the computer”
“Oh, here, I’ll take those”
And Darcy does take them. Straight to the trash can.
Gotta make sure the job’s open when you come back.
You’re out of shape. It’s been 27 hours and the work keeps on coming. It doesn’t help that Boston is so much bigger than Westview.
As you sit in one of the front desks, looking over paperwork and lab results, Ed comes in, holding a deck of cards.
“Pick a card”
“Did you get the lab results for Mrs. Pattmore?” you say, resisting the urge to slap the deck to the floor.
“No, they said it would take another hour…”
“Can you check again? Thank you”
Fortunately, he leaves and you sigh.
“He’s quite the character” a man shows up next to you, and you nod.
“He is very useful when I need urgent results from the lab. The technicians can’t stand him so they rather not see him around” you laugh.
 “I haven’t seen you before. I’m doctor Stephen Strange. Yes, that is my last name” he adds when you frown.
“Oh, nice to meet you. Yeah, I’m the interim Head of Trauma. Just until they find someone new”
“Huh. Not what I heard”
Well, there’s no way Melina will convince you to stay. But then again… you never thought you’d take the job in Boston.
“That’s definitely my plan” you assure him. “Were you on break?”
“Honeymoon. We just got back” he nods towards another woman who joins you, her smile wide. “Doctor Christine Palmer, meet… sorry, I didn’t get your name”
“Y/L Y/L/N. Congratulations to the both of you” you shake her hand.
“Thank you, how are you liking it here so far?”
“Everyone’s great” you say, but Christine catches your exhaustion.
“Lorne was just here asking to do a magic trick”
“Ah. That” she nods.
“Yeah” you get paged, and then wave at them. “See you around, and welcome back”
There’s a man coming in with a stab wound. Another shift from your work in Stark Hospital; the frequency of people who come in as a result of fights is a lot higher.
It was very rare to treat these kind of things in Westview.
“BP 130/70, no external bleeding or fractures” Yelena says and you nod, encouraging her to continue. “I want a chest X-Ray, transthoracic echocardiogram and blood work”
“The patient’s yours, Doctor Belova”
You’re honestly impressed. Yelena has been putting the work, and she’s very talented, especially while working under pressure.
“She has a good teacher” Melina speaks. The woman has a talent for knowing what people are thinking.
“Well, it’s in her blood, isn’t it? The whole Romanoff dinasty”
“Yes. By the way, this is your last patient. You’re not to be on call for so many hours in a week. The workload is very different here. And we will talk about a bonus so you can buy something to that girlfriend of yours to thank her for letting you be here”
About that.
Nobody knows Wanda kicked you out.
Except Yelena, but that’s because she kept asking about what Wanda said when you decided to come to Boston. The only way to shut her up was by telling her the truth.
It’s impressive that she’s kept the secret for so long.
“No need for a bonus, I’m doing my job as usual”
While you wait for the results of Yelena’s patient, the man begins to complain about pain between the shoulder blades.
“Lorne, book an OR and page Yelena” you say, knowing that’s a bad sign.
The blonde scrubs in as you begin the laparoscopy.
“What’s wrong? I’m still waiting on the results” she says, standing next to you.
“Pain between the shoulder blades is not a good sign for this type of injury. I’m seeing blood cloths in the anterior surface of the stomach and the liver. We’re switching to a laparotomy”
You find three lacerations in the liver and one in the stomach. Well, Melina’s plan didn’t work; you’re staying here for a bit longer.
As you move to inspect the pericardium, you look at Yelena, asking if she sees anything.
“No, it’s fine. Aside from the diaphragmatic perforation”
“And how are we closing that?”
“Ethibond suture with pledget” she answers after a slight hesitation.
“You’ll do it and I’ll be watching” you nod, moving aside. Truth is, your shoulder is hurting. It’s the old injury combined with the extra workload.
“Need any help?” Natasha walks in, and you shake your head no.
“I thought your shift ended”
“Came to do some post ops, and Doctor Romanoff asked me to help so you could go home”
“I’m fine” you lie. But Natasha stays in the OR, looking over Yelena’s shoulder.
“You’re making me nervous”
“Good. You could use some pressure. Y/N’s going soft on you” the redhead teases.
“I’m not!” you say, laughing. “I’ve been told I’m a great teacher”
“I’ve heard” Natasha nods.
Though Yelena takes a little bit longer than you would have, her work is excellent. Once you check everything’s done, you give the team instructions and scrub out.
“What are you doing with your siblings?” Natasha asks, joining you.
“Well, Jenny’s looking at NYU to apply. So I’ll meet them in New York, take them to a Broadway show. I was hoping they’d wanna go to the Met but not holding my breath for two teenagers to choose a museum”
“That’s fair. Have fun with your family” she smiles.
It’s weird to think about them as your family. They are, of course.
But to you, family is an entirely different group of people. One that you’ll never see again.
“Thanks. See you around” you nod, hoping to get some rest.
You never thought you’d be eager to see your family, but here you are, waiting in the airport, looking for Jenny.
As soon as she spots you, she runs towards you.
“Hey, kiddo”
“Make room for me” Zach says, jumping right in and making sure his sister has no room to breathe.
“You’re so annoying!” Jenny complains. Even if she’s three years older, Zach is a lot taller, being in that awkward teenage phase. “This trip was supposed to be just me”
“Y/N invited me” he says.
Well, kinda. He inserted himself in your conversations with Jenny, and as soon as he heard the words weekend in New York, he was ready to go.
“Well, I didn’t alter my girls weekend schedule for you, Zach. So just so you know, you’re getting a manicure and we’re plucking your eyebrows” you tease, walking them to where you parked. Of course they argue over who gets to ride in the front. “Alright, this is a rental. So, rule number one, no eating in the car. No throwing stuff at each other. No feet on the dashboard. And no one changes the music”
“Fine” they agree.
“First stop, the penthouse, then NYU”
Melina had heard about your trip and went out of her way to offer you everything at her disposal. Exclusive tickets, the Romanoff penthouse (apparently they have one in every major city), a reservation in a very nice restaurant.
You took most things happily. In a way, this is your compensation for emotional damages.
“So, what happened between you and Wanda?” Jenny says.
“Wow, can we at least have lunch first?” you accidentally hit the brake, making Zach hit his head against the headrest of your seat.
“I’m blind!”
“You’re fine” Jenny shushes him, turning to you. “I’ll tell you about our parent’s divorce”
“Ugh, deal. But you go first”
So, as you get food, Jenny tells you everything, with the occasional intervention from Zach. It’s nothing exciting, not technically. Their father finally realising your mother is an evil witch and taking their children away from her. It would have been ideal to do it when they were younger, but whatever.
“And you guys are doing good?” you ask, making sure things are better.
“Yeah… I just feel bad for her sometimes” Jenny admits. “Like what if she’s lonely or sad, you know?”
“That’s because you’re a good kid” you smile at her. “Let’s go get changed, we have to be ready for your college tour soon”
“What about your part of the deal?”
“Later” you say, trying to avoid talking about it.
By the time you reach the penthouse, you can’t help but admire the view to Central Park. It’s even bigger than the one they gave to you back in Boston.
“I want the biggest room” Zach says as soon as they drop their bags.
Of course, they’re engaging in a fight that involves some name calling and a lot of finger flicks on the forehead.
“You guys are worse than…”
They turn to look at you and you smile, trying to keep it together.
“Worse than…” Zach says but you shake your head.
“Nothing. Come on, better change fast”
Worse than Wanda and Pietro.
Will you ever stop thinking about her?
Earning the title of cool sister only takes a borrowed penthouse, Broadway tickets and exclusive seats at Yankees Stadium.
It’s day two and though you haven’t been able to convince them to go to the Met, you’re still enjoying yourself.
Kind of.
“So how long do these last?” you ask again, even if Zach explained the rules a dozen times already. “Ok, next time we’re going to the US Open because at least I’ll understand the game”
“So, you’re planning on staying here?” Jenny asks and you shrug your shoulders.
“There’s no plan for anything, really. I have two months left on my contract”
Zach goes to get more food and you keep watching the game in silence.
“Are you ok?” Jenny asks. Truthfully, though you’ve enjoyed spending time with them, Wanda’s been in the back of your mind more frequently than when you’re busy with work.
You can’t help but think about all the trips you never took with her, or wonder what she’d think about the city.
“Want the grown up answer or the big sister being brave answer?”
“I’d like the truth”
“Well…” you take a deep breath. “I’m not ok. I fucked up big time. I had everything I wanted within reach and just… I don’t know. Maybe it was never meant for me. It was too good”
“You are good enough for it, come on. Don’t say that”
“It’s hard to believe it when I hurt her so much. And the kids. But, it is what it is I guess”
“I’m sorry. If you wanna talk…”
“I know, sis. Thanks” you smile at her. All of the sudden you hear the crowd roaring and look up to see a ball that’s coming straight your way. You catch it, thinking nothing of it, while some people around you begin to speak to you. “What? Do I have to throw it back?”
“Are you insane?” Zach comes out of nowhere, taking it from you. “This is the coolest thing!”
“It’s a ball” you say, looking at the field.
“Nu-uh. It’s Camarena’s 50th home run. You know, the most promising baseball player of the season”
“Ok, if you say so”
Turns out it is a very big deal, as the player wants the ball back and is offering to meet you in exchange for it. You let Zach decide for the two of you, and his answer is an excited yes.
So, you take a couple of pictures and thank him when he hands you a signed baseball bat.
“Thanks, Carme…”
“Camarena” Zach elbows you. “I’m your biggest fan”
Yeah, you definitely earned the award to coolest sister, and it had nothing to do with all the money you spent. It came down to your ability to catch a freakin ball, like a competition with a golden retriever.
“We still have some time before we have to take the plane. What do you wanna do? You’ve been doing everything we want to” Jenny says, and you think about it.
“Let’s have a picnic in Central Park”
“Sounds fun” she agrees, while Zach keeps taking a million pictures of the bat.
As you walk around the park, you find something that unlocks a memory that was totally lost on you.
“Balto!” you point at a statue of the sleigh dog. They both look at you with blank expressions. “You’ve never seen Balto? Seriously?”
“I don’t know. Mom wouldn’t let us watch some stuff. She said it was silly to have a movie with speaking animals”
“That and Ghostbusters. But we never learned why”
“Oh, that’s because she and dad watched that movie on the day I was born” you explain while you pull out your phone to take a picture of the statue.
“Mom is such a bitch” Zach mutters and it makes you laugh.
“Come on, kid. Screw the picnic, I’m buying you the biggest burger we can find”
“See? I’m her favorite already” he teases Jenny and they begin to argue again. You hug them, staying in the middle to prevent a fight.
“Love ya both, kiddos”
Coming back to an empty house stings a bit more when you spent the weekend surrounded by playful banter and pleasant company.
The silence is unbearable and you know that at moments like this there’s only one thing that can make you forget.
So, even if you have to go to work tomorrow, you get changed and head for the usual club.
“Thought you found a better spot” Laura greets you as you approach the bar.
“Work was crazy” is all you say. No one knows your name, or what you do for a living. You just get drinks and dance to loud music.
“The usual?” you nod, accepting the glass of scotch. You enjoy it slowly for a bit, watching as some people dance and party. The outfits and the music are different from your time in college; plus Darcy and you used to go to shitty bars.
Either way, what hasn’t changed is how drunk people act; messy, unaware. You love it. No one’s asking if you’re ok, or why you're there.
“I was gonna buy you a drink, but you’re not done with that one yet” a woman offers with a flirty smile.
You finish what’s left of the scotch in one swift motion, and wink at her.
“There”
“Are you that thirsty, huh?” she teases, and you laugh, sipping from the new glass. “I’m Eve. You?”
“I’m… really thankful for my drink, Eve” you say, because you’re never gonna share your name with anyone else. “Wanna dance?”
The woman rolls her eyes, but follows you to the dance floor. It’s the perfect place to get lost, and avoid any conversation. The music’s loud, there’s people everywhere and you can simply disappear when you’re done.
It’s what you do best, isn’t it?
As you go out for another drink, there’s an impulse to talk to Laura.
“That was the name of a friend”
“What?”
“Laura. Well, not my friend. My ex girlfriend’s friend”
That’s about everything they have in common. This woman is covered in tattoos and has dark hair, styled in a mullet. Very Joan Jett, which is every girl’s type.
But my type is Wanda.
“Is that why you drink until I have to call you a cab?” Laura says, and you nod, taking a shot of tequila and asking for another one.
“Yeah. Come on, just one more” you plea when she’s doubting about giving you a third one. You pout and Laura rolls her eyes. “Thank you. Ah, I love this song!”
You blow her a kiss, running back to the dance floor. Wait, no, you don’t even know this song but it’s cool anyway.
And then the next one is good enough, until you’re a bit too drunk and have no idea what’s playing.
“Can I buy you a drink?”
To your disappointment, it’s a man.
“I’m fine!”
“Yes, you are” he says, putting his arm around your waist.
“I’m gay, dude. Stop it!” you push him away.
“Come on, you just need a good di…”
He doesn’t get to finish his sentence, not when your fist crashes against his nose.
Stupid move, as he’s tumbling to the floor, creating a commotion. You can tell he’s pissed when he stands up, but he never even gets to yell at you, because someone is pulling you back until you’re out of sight.
“You really are trouble” Laura tsks and you try not to laugh.
“He was an asshole”
“Yeah, he is. If it were up to me he wouldn’t go in at all. I have to get back to the bar. Stay here, drink some water. Then I’ll call you a cab”
“I’m sorry” you say, reaching for her when she walks past you.
“That girl did a number on you, huh?”
“I only have myself to blame” you smile sadly. “Thanks for the help”
Following the woman’s advice, you walk around the room, drinking some water and breathing to gather yourself. You’re vaguely aware of the pain in your hand, and remember that it was stupid to risk yourself that way.
If you can’t operate, Melina’s kicking your ass.
After a while, Laura comes back.
“Car’s waiting”
“Thanks… I owe you...”
“A cup of coffee”
You’re about to protest when she rolls her eyes.
“Not as a date. You have too many issues for me to handle. But I’d rather we stop meeting like this, with you starting a bar fight”
“Yeah, that’s fair” you smile, looking back before leaving the room. “My name’s Y/N, by the way”
“Nice to meet you, Y/N”
Stupid, stupid, stupid.
That’s all you can think about as you get ready for a 24 hour shift, sporting a massive headache and hangover.
You’re leaning against the elevator when the doors open, and you speak without opening your eyes, handing the keys of the car to Yelena.
“You’re gonna have to drive me today”
“Yelena already left”
You look up a little too fast, eyes meeting Natasha’s.
“Ah, jeez” you complain, feeling your head pound with the sudden movement.
“Rough night?” she says with a mocking tone, but then pays attention to your bruised knuckles, taking your hand. “What the hell? Are you ok?”
“Dude thought he could touch me and get away with it. It’s fine” you promise, though she doesn’t let go of your hand.
“You know mom’s gonna freak out when she sees this?”
“Don’t be a snitch, Romanoff” you say, stepping out of the elevator. “What are you doing?”
“Get in my car” she says, rolling her eyes. “You’re in no condition to drive”
“This is nice” you look around the Mercedes-Benz, reaching to touch the controls in the dashboard. Natasha slaps your hand away.
“Nicer than the Corvette?”
“Nah, let’s not get crazy”
“Did you have a nice weekend with the family?” she asks, rolling into conversation naturally.
“Yeah, we went to see Wicked because Jenny wanted to, then to a Yankees game where I caught the ball, which is apparently a big deal”
“It is, congrats”
“They made me buy some clothes that are not scrubs or…”
“Mini skirts? Like the one you wore last night”
“How did you…”
“My penthouse is in the same building, remember? Same as Yelena’s. Mom was smart enough to get a house away from everyone”
“Right”
“Doesn’t Wanda mind?”
That shuts you up real fast. And honestly? You don’t feel like lying. But as you’re about to answer her, she stops in the parking lot.
“Sorry, it’s none of my business” she mistakes your silence with annoyance.
“No, that’s not it” you explain, but then your phone pings. It’s a message from Jenny, sending you the Instagram post she made for the weekend in New York.
J: You made it to the gram!
Youths. You don’t even have instagram but click the link nonetheless. Yeah, those are nice pictures.
“Oh, you two came together?” Melina greets when she meets you in the hallway.
“Y/N can explain why” Natasha smirks and you glare at her.
“I was just feeling tired after the family trip”
“Natalia, who will be your plus one to the gala?” Melina changes the subject abruptly.
“I’m not taking anyone”
You direct your attention back to your phone, knowing they’re about to argue.
As you swipe through the pictures, a name catches your eye.
w.maximoff
What?
Does Wanda follow your sister?
She saw the pictures and liked them? Even if you were in them?
Don’t be an idiot, don’t think this means anything, she hates you, she’s better off without you.
The sudden urge to throw up has nothing to do with your hangover. You look around the hallway, and feel the desire to turn around and beg her to take you back.
You miss her too much, you can’t do this without Wanda.
Who are you kidding?
“Take Y/N” you hear all of the sudden.
“What?”
“Take Y/N to the gala with you” Melina decides, making Natasha roll her eyes.
“She doesn’t want to…”
“Yes. I’ll go” you interrupt Natasha.
Anything, anything at all to stop thinking about the one person who made your life worth living.
“Then it’s settled” your boss nods, pleased.
“Excuse me” you walk away, hoping there’s a ton of work that can keep your mind off everything else.
There is, and you’re grateful for the distraction it provides.
“I’m exhausted. How are you managing with a hangover?” Yelena complains after a few hours.
“Get some rest,” you mutter, looking at the lab results. “The OR won’t be ready for another hour anyway”
Unfortunately, it gets very slow as the day progresses. Everyone in the hospital is focused on a kidney transplant that is happening next week.
You see a woman walk in with her son to the ER and approach them.
“Hello, I’m Doctor Y/L/N. How can I help you?”
“Hi, yes. My son fell and I’m not sure, I think he might have hurt his wrist”
You turn to look at the kid, who is probably ten or eleven, and he looks back at you scared.
“I understand. What’s your name?”
“Kyle”
“Hi, Kyle. I’m Y/L. Can I take a look at your wrist?”
It takes him a moment to nod, but once he does you take him to one of the hospital beds where he sits. As you put on a pair of gloves, he looks around, clearly nervous.
“Cool shirt” you make conversation, noticing his Yoshi shirt. “My favorite is Rainbow Road, but the best time I ever did was on Vanilla Lake”
“Really? My favorite is Koopa Troopa Beach”
“That’s a good one” you agree, applying pressure on his wrist. “Ok, I don’t think anything’s broken but we need an X-ray to confirm. I’ll walk you there, it will take a minute”
Thankfully, it’s just a sprain.
“You’ll just wear a brace for a week, I’m also sending some medication for pain. Now, you’re gonna have to hold up on playing Mario Kart for a bit, as the movement isn’t good for your hand. Take it easy and if there’s any more discomfort or pain, come back to the hospital”
“Thank you” the woman nods, relieved that it’s nothing major. You’re about to say goodbye when her son hugs you.
“Take care, kid”
As you watch them walk away, your mind goes back to Billy and Tommy.
You miss them so much.
“Everything ok?” Yelena asks when you leave in a rush, walking towards the stairs.
Instead of answering her, you go down the steps, until you push the emergency exit, breathing heavily.
Don’t cry at work, don’t cry at work.
It’s not working. You squeeze your eyes shot, pinching the bridge of your nose.
A sob leaves your lips the minute Yelena catches up with you.
“It’s ok. I’m here” she says, hugging you.
“I miss them”
“I know. I’m sorry” is all she says, allowing you to cry as you lean your head on her shoulder.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t be…” you finally gather yourself, wiping away the tears. Your face is hot with the embarrassment of being so emotional in front of Yelena.
“I understand. There’s nothing to be sorry about. Come on, you should get some sleep. I’ll cover the ER for a bit”
“Ok” you nod. But she still follows you to the break room, and as you lay in bed, Yelena makes small talk, asking about your trip and telling you some funny things that used to happen to her and Natasha when their mother would leave them to roam the city while she had board meetings.
As she tells you about her favorite things from the Met, your eyes feel heavy and you fall asleep, exhausted.
The younger woman looks at you, feeling a bit guilty. She understands that everyone in this situation is an adult, and sometimes relationships don’t work.
But it’s still hard to see you so heartbroken and lonely.
“Hey” Natasha walks in the room, and Yelena shushes her, leaning her head towards you. “Is she ok?”
“I don’t know” the blonde admits, closing the door behind her.  “What’s up?”
“Mom told me you’re bringing a plus one to the gala! I thought we agreed no dates for this one”
“Oh, yeah…” Yelena blushes, and Natasha tilts her head.
“Who is it?”
“So, what are you doing? Should we find you a date?” Yelena rushes to change the subject, walking with her sister to the cafeteria.
“No, Y/N volunteered. Or, my mother kinda forced her to”
“Maybe it will be good to have a distraction. She’s having a rough time”
Natasha stays silent as they get some food. To be honest, she has been distant with you. It was hard to get close again after all the hard words you exchanged.
Natasha was just trying to protect herself.
“So you’re not gonna tell me who it is?” Natasha insists after a moment of silence. Yelena laughs, shaking her head.
“You’ll find out soon enough”
You open your eyes to the sound of your pager. The OR was busy for longer than anticipated and you’re about to go and check if everyone’s ready.
While you yawn, you dial Yelena’s number.
“Hello?” you hear Natasha’s voice.
“Why are you answering Yelena’s phone?” you say, doble checking that you indeed called her sister.
“Oh, crap. I took her phone by accident”
“Hey” you step out of the room, and find none other than Natasha, ready to leave for the day. “Guess your mother bought these phones in bulk”
You show her the mobile Melina gave you, though you insisted in keeping your number. It’s identical to Yelena’s and Natasha’s and every head of department has one as well.
“Heads up, she might be tracking your location”
“What? Can she do that?” you say, shaking the phone. Natasha smiles at that.
She forgets not everyone is expecting the worst from Melina.
“I better go and exchange phones with Yelena” the redhead says.
“Sure, can you tell her that the OR’s ready? Thanks”
You leave, but then Natasha’s voice stops you.
“Do you wanna do something tomorrow?”
There’s a hint of shock in your face, but you nod and smile.
“Yeah, sure. Wanna come over to watch a movie?”
“Sounds good” she agrees.
“Alright. See ya then” you wave goodbye.
Between this and the gala, Natasha doesn’t know if it’s a good idea to spend so much time together.
She’s about to find out.
Natasha is questioning her choices as she knocks on your door, thinking it might be unwise to spend alone time with you.
She had felt like you both got some closure after the emergency surgery on that woman. And then, one week later you had shown up at her hospital, as if you hadn’t refused the offer a number of times.
As if the thought of leaving your precious girlfriend behind wasn’t the craziest thing in the world.
“Hey, come on in” you greet, opening for her.
“Love what you’ve done with the place” she teases, watching as the only real decoration is a Polaroid picture of you and Yelena that is taped to the fridge.
“I’m happy this thing came with furniture or we’d be having dinner on the floor”
“Martha Stewart would be proud” she says and you roll your eyes.
“Come on, food will be ready in a bit” you say, asking her to open the bottle of wine.
“Where’d you get it from?”  she asks as she hands you a glass.
“Uh, the grocery store?” you look back from the stove.
“Wait, you’re making it? From scratch?” she puts her glass down, looking over your shoulder.
“Well, not from scratch, it’s not like I made the pasta”
“I thought you didn’t cook”
“I didn’t” you smile, offering her a taste of the sauce. “But I got used to the finer things in life, like a good old homemade meal, and had to figure out how to get something done”
“This is actually really good” she says, surprised.
“I will give you a pass because I am also surprised that my cooking’s not so bad”
It must have been because you used to watch Wanda cooking all the time.
Ah, shit.
Maybe eventually you’ll go a day without thinking about her. Or not, and that’s your karma for being an idiot.
Once everything’s ready, you pull out two plates, and serve the food.
“What do you wanna watch?”
“Not sure, could we eat first?”
“Why, want to check that I won’t give you food poisoning?” you joke, but Natasha doesn’t laugh. “Oh, come on! I’ve never gotten sick and it’s been a month!”
“Let’s just eat”
“Fine, are you sure you’re gonna be ok talking to me? You’ve been avoiding me since I arrived in Boston” you comment, though you can’t be mad at her.
It was easier to blame her for your screw up that own up to it. You’re not particularly proud of it.
“I wasn’t sure if your girlfriend would give you shit for talking to me”
“We’re not together anymore” you blurt out, making Natasha stop chewing.
“You’re shitting me”
“She broke up with me” you shrug your shoulders. “So I quit my job and ran away like the asshole I am”
There’s a beat of silence, and you keep eating. You’re not expecting anything from Natasha, like pity or words of comfort. It’s just the way things are.
“I had no idea… I’m sorry. I feel responsible”
“Nat, don’t. Honestly, you weren’t wrong. I am attracted to you, and I didn’t set boundaries. If anything, I’m sorry for being a jerk and ruining our friendship”
She keeps eating quietly, and you know that she accepted the apology without making a fuss about it.
“Crazy, stupid love” you mumble after a couple of minutes.
“Yeah, I guess it can be”
“No” you snort out a laugh. “I mean that’s the movie I wanna watch!”
“Oh, I don’t know it” Natasha rolls her eyes.
“Of course not, it’s not a Bond movie. Come on, now that you’ve seen my food won’t take you to the ER, let’s get everything ready” you say, picking up the dishes. Maybe you’ll make popcorn, even though you are full.
“Wait a minute” Natasha says, and when you turn around, she’s got you cornered against the kitchen counter.
“Huh?”
“You said you are attracted to me. Not were. So you still are” she smirks, eyeing you up and down.
“Well, yeah. Have you seen yourself?” you stutter. It’s not helping that you’ve gotten used to physical intimacy and you’ve been craving it for the past weeks.
But that makes you think of Wanda again.
“I just… you deserve more than being a rebound, Natasha. And I am serious when I say I’m not staying beyond my contract”
You know you can’t be someone who isn’t heartbroken and in love with Wanda. But you can at least be honest about it.
“I know. It’s just fun to watch you get all flustered” she says with a sultry voice.
“Not funny” you say, pushing her away.
“Let’s watch that silly, corny movie now” Natasha rolls her eyes.
“You’re gonna love it”
“Doubt it”
As you suspect, she’s critizing Cal at every possible turn, calling him a loser. She’s also constantly texting about the hospital in between complaints.
“Hey!” she protests when you snatch her phone.
“I know we’re both workaholics, but you’re missing the parts with Emma Stone which are arguably the best ones. And this big reveal will blow your mind”
So, you put both of your phones down in the coffee table and take it as a win when she’s laughing at some of the moments in the film.
“Hannah is Cal’s daughter?” Natasha screams when you get to that scene.
“See?”
“Damn!”
“Bathroom break” you announce a while later, leaving the movie playing as you know the dialogues.
Natasha is actually interested in the movie when her phone rings and she picks up without looking away from the screen.
“Hello?”
She’s met with silence, which makes her actually pay attention to whoever called her.
Shit.
Wanda.
She took your phone.
But before she can explain or tell the other woman to wait, the call disconnects.
“What’s wrong?” you say when you return, sitting next to Natasha. “I know it’s sad, but I promise it has a happy ending”
“Y/N, I’m so sorry”
“Nat, you’re scaring me”
“I thought it was my phone, I picked it up. Wanda called you” Natasha says, handing over the phone to you.
“Oh” you tilt your head, shocked. “What did she say?”
“Nothing. She hung up. I’m so sorry”
“Well, maybe she just wanted me to get my stuff. That’s the only reason she’d call me, honestly” you say, returning to the movie.
“Why aren’t you freaking out?” Natasha insists.
“I don’t know” you confess. Maybe you’re in shock. It feels surreal to have Wanda call you, after everything she said to you.
You left your old phone at Darcy’s house before jumping on a plane. You only got your old number back after Melina gave you one of those fancy phones.
Now you wonder if she ever tried to call you.
“I should go”
“And leave me to drown in obsessive thoughts?” you say dramatically. “Look, what’s the harm here? That she’ll think the worst of me, and then what? We broke up. She kicked me out, I’m gone like Wanda asked me to. I’ll just text Pietro and ask if the kids are ok”
That was your real concern. You had a feeling that it could be a mistake or something very serious. And you’d always put your pride aside for the sake of the kids.
“We’re watching a horror movie now” Natasha snatches the remote as soon as the credits roll, looking for Insidious. “That will distract you for sure”
“You’re evil” you say when Natasha walks out, laughing.
“And you’re a baby”
“There was a demon! Sewing while that creepy song played. You’re sick, Romanoff”
“Sweet dreams, Y/N” she says, whistling the song as she closes the door.
Now you won’t be able to sleep.
But there’s also another thing in the back of your mind.
Pietro hasn’t answered which can mean that it Wanda's call was a mistake and he’s choosing to ignore you.
Or something so monumentally horrible happened that he doesn’t even have his phone on him.
“Fuck it” you say, trying to control your breathing as you dial back.
You begin to feel like an idiot, especially when it’s pretty obvious Wanda won’t pick up the phone.
Hands squeeze the device as you deal with the disappointment. You are about to hang up when you hear it.
Wanda, saying your name.
And for a moment, you feel like everything’s ok again.
214 notes · View notes
coffeeprincessstuff · 1 day ago
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A casual date ft. Gojo Satoru
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The first time Gojo Satoru walked into the café you work at, you didn’t think much of him.
Sure, he was tall. And ridiculously good-looking. And way too confident for someone ordering the sweetest, most sugar-loaded drink on the menu.
But beyond that? He was just another customer.
Then he kept coming back.
Every few days, like clockwork, he strolled in—always in dark sunglasses, always with that smug grin, always ordering something absurdly sweet. At first, you thought he just really liked the drinks. But then you started noticing things.
Like how he always showed up when your shift started.
Or how he lingered at the counter, trying to make conversation with you when the café was empty.
Or how he never seemed in a rush to leave, even when he had his order in hand.
“You know, for someone who supposedly has the most important “secret” job ever, you have way too much free time,” you remarked one evening, sliding his usual drink across the counter.
Gojo grinned, tapping the side of his cup. “You don’t know that. Maybe I’m incredibly busy, but I make time for the things that matter.”
“Right, and that ‘thing’ just happens to be overpriced matcha lattes full of whipped cream?”
“Exactly,” he said with a wink.
You rolled your eyes but couldn’t hold back a small smile.
Gojo watched you for a beat, then suddenly said, “Hey, you free tonight?”
You paused and turned back to him, narrowing your eyes at him. “Why?”
“Wow, so suspicious! If you’re free, lets go out.” he said.
Your brows furrowed in confusion and said, “Wait. Are you asking me on a date?”
Gojo smirked, not even missing a beat. “I mean, can’t I ask my favorite barista out on a date?”
You raised an eyebrow. “I’m your only barista here. You literally ignore everyone else who tries to take your order.”
“That’s because they don’t make my drinks with the same love,” he said, smirking.
You gave him a flat look. “Love? Babe, I don’t even know you that well.”
“Tragic. But I can change that. One date. Just humor me.”
You sighed, staring at him for a long moment. “Fine. But only because I’m tired of you hitting on me at my work.”
Gojo beamed, grabbing his drink. “Oh, this is gonna be so fun. I know just the place. Meet me after your shift.”
—————————————————————————
You should’ve known Gojo’s idea of “just the place” wouldn’t be a normal restaurant.
Instead, he took you to a quiet little food stall in an alleyway—a small, cozy spot lit by dim lanterns, with rickety stools and the scent of freshly grilled food filling the air.
Honestly? You kind of loved it.
“Didn’t expect this, huh?” Gojo grinned as he plopped down across from you.
“Not at all. I thought you’d drag me somewhere flashy.”
“Please. That’d be too predictable,” he said, leaning back. “Besides, Yakitori here’s amazing.”
And he wasn’t wrong.
The two of you ordered a ridiculous amount of food, and Gojo—unsurprisingly—had zero shame about eating half of it in record time.
“You eat like you’re in a competition,” you remarked, watching as he popped another skewer into his mouth.
He grinned. “What! can’t handle a guy with a big appetite?”
You smirked. “I can handle a lot of things.”
Gojo paused, then let out a low whistle. “Oh? Now that’s interesting.”
You rolled your eyes. “You know, I don’t think you actually care about dating.”
Gojo blinked, then tilted his head, amusement flickering in his expression. “What makes you say that?”
“You’re good at this. Too good. But I don’t think you’re actually trying.”
For a second—just a second—the teasing glint in his eyes dimmed.
Then, he laughed, shaking his head. “Ouch. And here I thought I was being charming.”
“You are charming,” you admitted, meeting his gaze. “But I don’t think you let people get too close to you.”
Gojo exhaled dramatically, resting his chin on one hand. “And here I thought this was a date, not a therapy session.”
You didn’t say anything. Just waited. And maybe that was what caught him off guard.
Because for the first time all night, his smile wasn’t cocky. It wasn’t teasing. It wasn’t the usual performance he put on for the world.
It was just there. Small, thoughtful. And real.
“You might be more fun than I expected,” he said, eyes glinting with something unreadable.
You chuckled and said, “I’m a complete package if you just removed your sunglasses and looked a little bit closer.”
Gojo smirked and said, “Careful, or I might actually start liking you.”
You smirked. “You say that like you haven’t already.”
Gojo chuckled, “Damn. You are good.”
And for the first time in a while you felt like it has been a nice date night.
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bathroomcryptid · 2 days ago
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The Real Housewives of the Imperium
A/N: This is just some bullshit my brain vomited while I was procrastinating other things. Enjoyyy
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Lore Drop™️ before we begin: In my personal headcanon of whatever the fuck this is, the wives of the Primarchs definitely act as a political arm of their respective legion/Primarch. They are the ones that involve themselves with the administration and nobility and royalty of the Imperium, and this is a role the Primarchs are happy enough to dump on them while they’re off fighting wars. It also means that the wives run into each other a lot.
Who Hates Each other?
-I would say no one really hates each other, but that’s a lie. The Red Lady and the Wolf Mother cannot under any circumstances be in the same room together, they will absolutely kill each other it’s not pretty.
-The Raven Mother, while not generally having any disagreements with anyone, is just around so rarely it’s hard to say she has any really good friends amongst the wives.
Who are friends?
-First, The Khatun has some freaky superpower that lets her get along with literally everyone and everyone loves her. She is literally everyone’s best friend and she loves it.
-Lady Lupercal, The Mother of the Salamanders, and The Khatun have seen everything. These were the first three spouses and the only Primarch spouses for a long time. Not only were they the first, but they were also the only three to have been with their husbands prior to the Emperor’s appearance. These three wrote the book and have a deep friendship because of their circumstances.
-The Lady of the Hydra, the Dark Lady, Lady Guilliman, Lady Lupercal, and the Lady of the Emperor’s Children are all somehow extremely good friends and it’s so bad for everyone’s health because these women SCHEME. If you fuck with them or their husbands they will have the entire Imperium legitimately thinking you sacrifice babies to pagan gods in your free time by the next cycle do not mess with them. They also will pull up to the function with the best gossip.
-A surprising friendship here - the Mother of the Salamanders and Lady Curze. Everyone was expecting the Red Lady and Wolf Mother round two with these two, but noooo, they get along like a house on fire and that’s what they’ll do to yours if you fuck with them. Whereas our Quintet of trouble up there will spin you around with their words, these two are more of the “corner you in a dark alley with a knife and threaten you within an inch of your life” type.
-The Lady of the Death Guard, Lady Aurelian, the Khatun, and Lady Kurze also float around each other because they are four of the genuinely nicest people you’ll ever meet and they subconsciously bond over it.
-The Wolf Mother and the Dark Lady are drinking buddies
How do they complain about their husbands/step-children to each other?
-Now when it comes to complaining? The Lady of Iron is there, first in line to start complaining about her husband and you know who’s right behind her? The Lady of the Iron Hands because I know in my heart of hearts she’s beefing with her step-children. Between these two there are literal hours of content.
-Even though those two are in a league of their own, most gatherings between these women usually devolve into complaints about their husbands.
-Fun fact: It’s actually during one of these complaint sessions that Lady Guilliman got the idea to ban paperwork from the bedroom.
-Although, some of these women are putting back breaking work into these men, so honestly, they deserve to complain a little
Who is talking up their husbands/step-sons?
-You know who’s not complaining? Lady Aurelian and the Lady of the Death Guard on god they love their husbands more than anything and no one knows why because they are so hot. Deadass, they pulled up to the function looking like goddesses with baked goods and everyone else was like “…sorry, the Imperium’s Next Top Model is like two doors down”, but no they were in fact in the right place and everyone is still surprised.
-Also, be careful when it comes to mentioning the step-children because there are some *cough* The Mother of the Salamanders *cough* who keep a whole book of all their kids and their accomplishments on them at all times and they will yap on about them for HOURS. The Mother of the Salamanders is like one of those dads that have pictures of their kids accordion style in their wallet and they open it up and a whole string of pictures falls out but she has too many kids so she needs a book.
-It’s also a perilous topic of conversation around The Lady of Angels and The Lady of the Emperor’s Children because they will pull out their step kid’s artwork and they will make you look at it and compliment it. For. Hours.
-It’s not unheard of for particularly these three to be at events with the step-children and not shut the fuck up about them.
The Mother of the Salamanders: *to the person next to her* This is my son [insert Salamander name here]. He is just the most wonderful son ever. He just got back from defending a planet from Xenos! Look at this picture of him right after they claimed victory! *holds up a picture of said Salamander covered in blood looking majestic on the battlefield* And look at this sword he just made! He’s so talented! *proceeds to open a whole scrapbook, flip to said son’s page, and fold out a ton of pictures because they wouldn’t all fit on the paper* And look at this-
Salamander: *blushing under his helmet*
The Mother of Angels: *to the person next to her* You know, my son here [insert Blood Angel name here] is quite the performer.
Random Noble Probably: Ah, really-
The Mother of Angels: Yes! He’s just so talented! *pulls out a stack of photos* You see, this is him playing the piano, his first instrument, and then here you see he decided to try out the harp. He’s absolutely excellent at both and then- *continues chattering on and on*
Blood Angel: *flattered that Mom cares so much*
The Lady of the Emperor’s Children: *sits down next to someone* Hello, lovely, how are you?
Random Noble: Ah, My Lady, I’m well and you?
Lady of the Emperor’s Children: Ah, I’m spectacular. Say, have you met my son [insert Emperor’s Child name here]?
Random Noble: We have not had the pleasure.
Lady of the Emperor’s Children: Well, this is [insert name again]. You know, he’s quite the talent, almost perfect at anything he tries his hand at. You know, he recently picked up painting. *starts rummaging and pulls out a stack of photos* See, here was his first one. I was so surprised at how good he was on his first try, and then he followed it up with this one and I was absolutely blown away! *Off she goes on a tangent*
Emperor’s Child: *can’t tell whether to be flattered or concerned that Mom has that many pictures of him*
-Though they aren’t the only three culprits of this, most of them have done this, the rest of them, though, usually shut up after about an hour or two and only have a few pictures on them of their step kids.
-cuts over to the Lady of the Iron Hands and her step-children who are trying to growl at each other around a very tired looking Ferrus Manus who is sat between them.
-though, most of these women love to brag about their step-children and how great at everything they are.
-The Lady of Iron is also another big culprit, she loves showing off her step-kids. She has also threatened Perterabo within an inch of his life when he’s ragged on his kids.
-The mental health of the Iron Warriors rose significantly once the Lady of Iron was apart of the picture.
-Almost as much as they like bragging about their husbands.
-As much as they complain, this is a group of the most fiercely loyal group of women you’ll ever get in a room together.
-They hear a whisper of a complaint about their husband? It’s over for you, you’ll be dead or wishing you were by dinner. They hear you praise their husband? You’re not leaving until they’ve told you every amazing thing their husbands have ever done in their lives.
The Ultimate Uniting Factor:
-There is one person, one man, in the entirety of the known and unknown galaxy who has the ability to bring these women, even the Red Lady and the Wolf Mother, together like nobody else: Big E
-If you mumble under your breath anything that could possibly be construed as a complaint against the Emperor of Mankind then you may as well have shined the Batsignal in the air because these women are coming out of the woodwork.
-Now they are all here and they have all involved you in a conversation that couldn’t be construed as anything but absolute treason if it were to come out of anyone else’s mouth
-If you were to put these women in a room together and point a camera at them and let them talk for a few hours, every single time it would devolve into irate ranting about Big E. You would never catch a kind word about Big E falling from their lips.
-The Emperor won’t step foot in the same zip code as these women because he understands that they are down every second of every day to literally evict him from life.
-The Emperor literally started a crusade as an excuse to leave Terra because he got word that the Khatun was on her way.
-Say what you will about the Emperor of Mankind, he’s smart enough to know that these women will end him where he stands if they ever get their hands on him.
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banana-can-do-art · 2 days ago
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Guys I just finished the well it’s not the entirety of Riddle’s dream there’s still like an hour and a half that hasn’t been translated on Gasmask’s channel but I finished the part that they did translate and omg heeelp this is the best dream yet. This is so sad omg I have to ramble about it also all translations I’m using are from gas mask on YouTube.
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First of all omg he’s so happy it’s making me sad. Also him saying that he would be tired of everything being the same all the time right after I made that post rambling about how his implied OCD causes him to always do everything in a “samey” manner I aaaaagghhhh. And he’s saying that he’s going to have a chaotic band because in his dream he isn’t upset when things aren’t in order and he can just let himself be happy. You can’t do this to meeee! But there’s more!
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Look he’s happily breaking the rules and feeling no anxiety about it whatsoever. (OCD be gone). In his dream world he can do what he wants with no terrible parents or mental illness holding him back. Look at him he’s adorable. And then we have this though agghhh.
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This is so sad! When Ace and everyone tells him about what he’s like in real life as though they are talking about another person, Riddle immediately hates the person they are describing. Because he doesn’t like who he is irl. In fact, Riddle even says here that he hates school and studying and that it makes people miss out on the fun things in life. It’s so sad because who he actually is irl is the complete opposite of what he wants to be. He’s so isolated and self loathing I can’t.
Also in the dream Riddle isn’t even a mage. Because he doesn’t even actually like doing magic because all of the joy was sapped out of that for him because he’s always expected to do it perfectly. He never just gets to do magic because he wants to or because it’s fun but rather only because others expect and pressure him too. It feels like the idea of a hobby losing its charm and fun when people have to make it into their jobs. (I hope that doesn’t happen to me heeeelp)
Also I felt so bad for Trey during this because he knows the most about Riddle’s reality and he is the entrenched in it himself. Riddle’s mom screamed at him for five hours as a child and he’s scarred from everything that happened with Riddle and his mom as a kid and yet now he’s supposed to just walk into Riddle’s house like nothing’s wrong. That must be so jarring and unsettling. Props to Trey for managing to do that honestly that’s freaking terrifying.
Also I can’t with all of those pictures on the wall. What do you mean he hates his real life so much that in his dreams his entire memory has become fabricated. His real life memories are completely different from his dream memories. And what do you mean that in his dream his parents are together and they love him and neither of them are mages and he just lives a happy and normal life?! What do you mean?!
Also, even though his parents love him in the dream, his mom has been so awful to him irl that even though everything is fake he can’t even actually picture her face saying nice things to him so it’s just the house talking to him. That’s so awful!
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Also then we get this whole reference to the scene in Alice in wonderland where Alice has the big tears and people are drowning. Except it’s tea this time lol. Also Riddle crying that he wants to get out of the house is so sad even in his dreams he can’t escape agshdjdjdj. Omg Cater is so funny in the drowning scene though, he’s just like stop crying we’re gonna drown lmao. Also I know Chenya is fake but it is still so unbelievably funny how he is literally drowning in tea and yet he just has this huge smirk on his face the whole time lol. Chenya’s so silly.
Also the house became so creepy omg I saw someone saying it looks like an rpg maker horror game and like it really does! Specifically I think it really looks like Sunny’s house during the truth sequence of Omori.
Speaking of rpg maker horror games, Malleus was really channeling his inner rpg maker horror villain this update. Poor Idia lol. My condolences to Idia, he’s become the main character of an rpg maker horror game. I dunno Idia if we are going for Omori parallels then maybe you should open that door.
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And then later when he gets pulled deeper the dream reflects false desires. To have control over the dorm while everyone bows down to him is was he thinks he wants but not his actual true desire. That’s why in the second layer of his dream even though he is in power, he still seems miserable because we know that he doesn’t even want to be a mage in the first place, much less have all of these rules.
And then Chenya pushes him over and he gets tangled in his cape lmao. That was so funny and then the screen is just Riddle with his feet in the air lmao. That outfit is not conducive to getting up from a fall.
But omg when the darkness is telling him that in the dream they respect him while irl he is isolated it’s so sad. Because he knows that irl his rules and strictness (and OCD) isolate him and that’s why it’s so difficult for him to make friends. He understands that he is lonely because he is a control freak like this, and yet it’s the only thing that he knows how to do because it’s all he’s been taught. (And also because he’s mentally ill you see).
This is all so sad I can’t. Twst! How could you do this to me?!
Anyway, in conclusion punk band Riddle is the most amazing thing to ever grace my eyeballs just look at him. We need a Riddle vocaloid band rhythm game spinoff immediately actually. Also his new fit is absolutely slaying look at him go!
Now I must wait in agony for the next hour and a half or so to be translated by the great and amazing fandom hero, gasmask.
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brain4stew · 22 hours ago
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HIIII! (Ignore this if this if this has been already sent my last one got bugged so i dont know if it got sent or not😭😭) if its ok can I request for a 1x1x1x1 x reader where it was a valentines event and they were just walking around checking booths but suddenly both of em got dragged into a marriage booth and they both have to act getting married whether they like it or not and yes they have to kiss at the end to complete it, Thank you so much!!
Hehehehe…. We live for this embodiment of hatred, being pulled into things he doesn’t like. 😇
Anyway! I’ll see what I can do with your request anon!
(As always, I do not know the characters exact personalities and so on, so they might, if not most likely will be OOC!!)
That being said, headcanons/something under the cut!! ;
• The other killers would have to quite literally beg, plead and DRAG 1x1x1x1 to the event, and have to make sure he doesn’t go and kill Shedletsky…
• When he is there, he’s most likely closed off. I mean, he’s the embodiment of hatred, what’d you expect from him? To be happy and excited? No.
• He is however, interested in the booths, the games, the decorations and the other things, that are around the event.
• Unbeknownst to him AND you, is that… Noob and Elliot thought you two would be the perfect candidates for their little booth game.
• When you were checking their booth out, Noob has, surprisingly, managed to push 1x1x1x1 to you.
• Which… Ended up with you and him being in on the game… (So much of a fun time for you and 1x1x1x1…)
• He’s distant at first, and you have to just tell him the amount of time it is on the game, and he’ll reluctantly (with hesitation) start to open up, so he can be done with this game.
• You and him start off with doing couple related things from the event. You both do get weird looks, but no one is bold enough to say anything or ask anything, as they don’t want to be on the receiving end of 1x1x1x1’s wrath…
• Noob and Elliot however, told you and 1x1x1x1, that there’s a challenge for you both. That you have to kiss, for the game to actually work! (1x1x1x1 got reasonably mad about that, and almost tried to kill them both. John Doe had to restrain him for a while because of that…)
• But, you and him reluctantly agreed, (with hesitation of course.) and kissed each other, quickly, out of embarrassment. Not wanting to actually full on kiss each other.
• Overtime as the game you and 1x1x1x1 are participating in, you both gradually seem to become more like a… Couple, somehow? (I have no idea how you managed that, but, pop off!)
• Noob and Elliot have told you that, for the game to stop, you have to make out. Yeah, you heard them correctly.
• You both were a flustered and embarrassed mess. 1x1x1x1 however, being reasonably angry at it, just, dragged you somewhere more hidden. Out of earshot and eyesight.
• Once he made sure no one was around, he pulled you towards him, and full on, made out with you. (Unfortunately that fucker is inexperienced, so you took the lead.)
• After a bit of reluctance, after you patted his arm for air, he pulls back. With you and him breathing heavily. (Unbeknownst to you both, Noob and Elliot recorder it secretly.)
• When you both came back to Elliot and Noob’s booth, you were both handed a… Pin? Which said; “Survived an embarrassing game!” You and 1x1x1x1 had to refrain from laughing at the pin…
• When the event ends, however… 1x1x1x1 will not be friendly to you in any rounds whatsoever, especially if you tease him about the game you both had.
• God, you’re insufferable. 1x1x1x1 just wants to put your ego to rest. And under him.
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moonselune · 23 hours ago
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hiya!!
could u write for that prompt u already did, with muscular woman tav, wearing a wavemother robe, but with Jaheira, Karlach, and Shadowheart? Thanks!
yesssssssssssssssss this was so fun to write!
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Karlach:
You take a deep breath, smoothing your hands over the silken fabric of the Wavemother’s Robe, feeling a little ridiculous. The garment is light, flowing, and drapes over your frame in a way that feels almost foreign. You’ve never worn something so delicate before—so soft, so utterly not made for someone like you.
You glance at yourself in the small mirror shard you keep in your tent. The robe barely reaches past your knees, and with your broad shoulders and powerful frame, it seems like it should be out of place on you. Yet… it isn't ugly. Just different.
Still, you can’t shake the nagging thought in the back of your head—what if it looks wrong? What if Karlach sees you and—
You shake the thought away and step out of your tent. The second you do, Karlach freezes. You blink at her, confused. She was mid-step, having clearly been about to approach, but now she just stands there, staring. Her mouth is slightly open, her golden eyes locked onto you like a predator that’s just spotted prey.
And then, steam—actual, literal steam—starts rising off of her skin.
“Karlach?” you ask, feeling more self-conscious than before. “You okay?”
She makes a small, strangled noise in the back of her throat.
You frown. “Do I look stupid?”
"Stupid?" Karlach finally manages to choke out, blinking rapidly like she’s trying to reboot her entire system.
Her hands are twitching at her sides, fingers flexing like she can’t decide whether she wants to reach out and touch you or just explode where she stands.
“You—you absolute goddess.” Karlach breathes the words out in pure reverence, eyes raking over you so intensely that you actually feel hot under her gaze. "How—what—fuck.”
Your brow furrows. “You like it?”
Karlach laughs. It’s a breathless, wild thing, like she can't believe you even asked. “Like it? Babe, I am fighting for my life right now.”
You blink. “…What?”
“Do you—do you even know what you look like right now?” Karlach gestures wildly at you, practically vibrating. “You're a foot taller than me, built like a gods-damned mountain, wearing that.” She swallows hard. “Do you have any idea what that’s doing to me?”
You stare at her. Then glance down at yourself. Then back at her.
“…No?”
Karlach makes another strangled sound. Then, before you can react, she lunges. You barely have a moment to brace yourself before you’re body-tackled back into your tent, landing on your back with an "oof!"
Karlach is already crawling over you, her hands hot against your skin as she yanks at the silken fabric, her breathing ragged.
“I—I should—I should help you take this off,” she stammers, but her hands are moving before she even finishes the sentence.
You let out a stunned laugh. “That desperate, huh?”
Karlach growls, low in her throat. “Babe, I am about to combust.”
She isn’t lying—there’s actual heat radiating from her, and her engine is whining with the strain of keeping it together.
You smirk up at her, reaching up to cup her flushed face, fingers brushing over the cooling vents on her cheeks. "Guess that means I should wear this more often, huh?"
Karlach groans. "Please don’t, I will literally die."
You laugh, only for her to kiss you so fiercely that all your thoughts vanish in a haze of heat, silk, and strong hands pulling you closer.
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Shadowheart:
You take a deep breath, adjusting the Wavemother’s Robe as it drapes over your body. The fabric is soft, flowing in a way that feels foreign against your battle-worn skin. It barely reaches past your knees, and the loose, delicate sleeves do nothing to hide the sheer power of your arms. You feel wrong in it—too big, too solid, too much of everything this robe wasn't made for.
With a sigh, you step out of your tent, bracing yourself for whatever reaction you’re about to get. You don’t expect to find Shadowheart completely frozen in place.
She stands a few feet away, lips slightly parted, silver eyes wide as they slowly drag down your body and then back up again, as if she can’t quite believe what she’s seeing.
“…Shadowheart?” you say, feeling even more self-conscious.
No response.
You shift your weight slightly, watching her, and that’s when you notice—her hands are clenched into fists at her sides, white-knuckled. Her jaw has gone slack. And her knees—her knees are actually, visibly weak.
You narrow your eyes. “Are you okay?”
She finally seems to snap back to reality—only she doesn’t look at your face. No, her gaze is locked firmly lower, just slightly south of where your collarbone dips beneath the robe’s neckline.
You follow her line of sight. Then, after a pause, you slowly cross your arms over your chest. Shadowheart’s lips press together, her eyes still glued downward. You snap your fingers in front of her face.
She flinches, blinking rapidly, as if being pulled from some sort of trance. “I—uh—”
You raise an eyebrow. “Were you staring at my chest this entire time?”
There’s a beat of silence, and then Shadowheart—normally so composed, so controlled—actually flushes, a deep pink creeping up her pale cheeks. “No.”
You deadpan. “You absolutely were.”
Shadowheart clears her throat, straightening her posture in a pathetic attempt to regain dignity. “I was simply… admiring the craftsmanship of the robe.”
You narrow your eyes. “Uh-huh. The craftsmanship.”
She clears her throat again, glancing away. “Yes. The, uh… stitching is very fine.”
You take a slow step toward her, watching as her pupils dilate slightly. “You’re still staring.”
Shadowheart swallows, her voice quieter now. “Can you blame me?”
You smirk, amused by her rare flustered state. “I could if you were being a little less obvious about it.”
Shadowheart exhales sharply, her hands twitching at her sides as if she desperately wants to touch but is restraining herself. Then, after a pause, she exhales and looks up at you with something unreadable in her expression—an almost challenging glint.
“Perhaps I should be punished for my bad manners,” she murmurs, voice deceptively soft. “Wouldn’t you agree?”
You feel your smirk widen, a slow heat curling in your chest. “Oh? Is that so?”
Shadowheart tilts her head slightly, a sly smile tugging at her lips. “I am but a humble servant of Shar, after all. I do enjoy a little… discipline.”
Your stomach flips, and suddenly, the insecurity you had felt earlier is a distant memory. Shadowheart isn’t just attracted to you—she’s weak for you.
And, well… maybe you can use that to your advantage.
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Jaheira:
The Wavemother’s Robe feels wrong from the moment you put it on.
It’s soft, flowing, and light—too light. The way it drapes over your broad shoulders and cinches at your waist feels alien, unnatural. You tug at the fabric, scowling, adjusting the way it falls over your muscular frame, but it doesn’t help. You are a warrior. You’re built to cleave through enemies, to stand tall on the battlefield, to strike fear into those who would dare cross you. Not to wear something that makes you look like a damn priestess.
You glance at yourself in the mirror—well, as much of your reflection as you can see in the dull metal of your weapon. You could be intimidating in this, you suppose. It still shows the power in your arms, the strength in your stance. You could be some ancient warrior-goddess, draped in divinity, untouchable and terrible in your beauty.
…Or you could look ridiculous.
You exhale, shaking your head. This was a mistake. You should just take it off before anyone sees—
“Are you coming out, or are you just going to hide in there all night?”
Jaheira. You freeze, eyes widening slightly before you curse under your breath. There’s no escaping this now. Steeling yourself, you push open the flap of your tent and step out.
And Jaheira stops dead in her tracks. She had been approaching with her usual effortless confidence, arms crossed, brow raised, ready to tease you about how long you’d taken. But now?
Now she just stares.
Her mouth parts slightly, but no sound comes out. Her sharp green eyes drag over your form—slowly, like she’s cataloging every inch of you, every detail. She’s standing stiffly, her jaw tight, her fingers twitching at her sides.
You hesitate. “…Jaheira?”
Nothing. Not even a blink. She is utterly, completely frozen.
You shift, feeling suddenly self-conscious. “You’re staring.”
At that, Jaheira blinks—like she’s just remembered how to function—and immediately scowls. “I—what—no, I am not.”
You smirk. “You absolutely are.”
“I am merely—” she cuts herself off, clears her throat, then attempts again. “—merely assessing your choice in attire.”
“Uh-huh.” You tilt your head, stepping closer. “And?”
Jaheira opens her mouth, then closes it. Her lips press into a firm, thin line, like she’s physically forcing herself not to say something she’ll regret. But then—gods help her—her gaze dips again, and you can see her willpower crumbling before your eyes.
A faint flush creeps up her neck.
You raise an eyebrow. “Jaheira… are you flustered?”
Her eyes narrow. “Of course not.”
You step closer, watching as her shoulders stiffen, watching as her gaze flickers—just briefly—to the way your muscles flex beneath the fabric.
She inhales sharply through her nose.
You let out a low, satisfied chuckle. “Oh, this is fantastic.”
Jaheira groans, pinching the bridge of her nose as if physically pained. “Do not make me regret ever looking at you.”
You smirk. “A little late for that, isn’t it?”
She exhales, long and suffering, but now she refuses to meet your eyes—her pride won’t let her. Instead, she folds her arms behind her back, straightens her spine, and in the most dignified voice she can muster, says, “Well. I suppose you look… decent.”
Your grin widens. “Decent?”
She scowls. “Acceptable.”
You step even closer, lowering your voice. “Jaheira.”
She glares at you, and yet her ears have turned red. “Fine,” she snaps. “You look devastating. Now get away from me before I embarrass myself further.”
You laugh, throwing an arm around her shoulders despite her protests. “You already embarrassed yourself, my love.”
Jaheira groans into her hands, but she doesn’t pull away. If anything, she leans into you just the slightest bit. And if you catch her sneaking another glance at you later that night—well, you’ll let her have that small victory.
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hehehe I love writing my simpy horny girls. Also idek what I was on complaining that the Lucille font had changed, clearly my mac was just having a moment. Anyway hope you guys enjoyed it! - Seluney xox
If you want to support me in other ways | Help keep this moonmaiden caffeinated x
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ithilien-writes · 4 months ago
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i know they're going to find a way to give us basically nothing but i'm still so stoked to see the 8x04 preview tonight. like almost as much as i'm excited for the ep itself
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skitskatdacat63 · 2 years ago
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those 2011 pics remind me of hard the McLaren race suits used to fuck, I loved the vodafone era suits so much 🥹
YES AGREED!!! I love the Vodafone McLaren livery, literally peak!!!!!
Thank you for sending this ask bcs now I get to talk about 2011 in particular. There were these special Saturday race suits and they're all so pretty!!! Hugo Boss did a design competition to celebrate their partnership with McLaren and different artists made different designs for the Quali days. They're so beautiful 🥹🥹 Why can't they do anything fun like that now???? I digress, I went through all the Qualis and compiled pics of all of them!!
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#which is your guys' fav?#mine would prob have to be Hungary. Japan. India. Malaysia.#i think all the Asian ones are soooooo cool with all the colors and animal motifs!!#anyways so right anon!!! vodafone mclaren was peak livery and designs!!! chrome/red >>>>>>>>> papaya#anyways hahaha prob not what you expected my reply to be#but this has been stuck in my brain for a while#i remember seeing the Hungary one at some point and thinking it was incredibly beautiful but having no idea the context behind it#and your ask made me finally go to research it#this was super fun to research bcs i didnt realize there was so many!!! literally 18 different racesuits.....so fucking sick.....#im obsessed with race overalls in general like theyre just so cool to me so to see all these different ones is just unbelievebly sick to me#one day ill make a post abt race suit details that make me feral(e.g. when suits used to have race belts & the FIA badge on the neck)#ive downloaded a lot of 2011 pics bcs of sebson but never rly thought any deeper abt why there were so many race suit varieties#the hungary one won the contest(very rightfully) so Jense wore it for the Brazil GP in entirety!!#i also think the Germany won as well bcs Lewis was wearing it for the Brazil gp? but im super biased towards the hungarian one haha#f1 lore??? i guess????? idk if this is obscure or not! obscure to me at least!! i mean that boss yt vid has only 2k views lmao#f1#formula 1#lewis hamilton#jenson button#mclaren#vodafone mclaren#formula oe#we do a little bit of f1#catie.asks.#f1 lore
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blujayonthewing · 6 months ago
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SUPREMELY frustrating that we found something actually really cool and intriguing and plot relevant in tonight's session but I'm still so constantly preoccupied with whether the DM is going to 100% kill us with sheer poor game design that I barely have enough brainspace left over to even enjoy it
#the first half of the session was a random-off-a-rolltable encounter that had nothing to do with anything and gave us literally nothing#and used up all our resources and took a REALLY long time because it was-- you guessed it! another deadly encounter for some reason!!#that's 100% of the encounters we've had so far!#and EXPLICITLY not related to what we were trying to investigate AND creatures that drop neither loot NOR BODIES#(two wil o the wisps and a water wierd)#we did a lot better in this encounter but it WAS deadly going off CR#and the point is now we've done just a short rest and THEN found the Plot Thing-- which our bard used up a bunch of resources to access#SO NOW IT'S LIKE. OKAY LOOK. I WANNA PLAY IN THIS SPACE BUT YOU KEEP TRYING TO KILL US WITH THINGS THAT AREN'T EVEN IMPORTANT#ARE YOU ABOUT TO WHOOPSIE-DOODLE US INTO A TPK ON ACCIDENT HERE???#like... it FEELS dangerous and A Bad Idea to engage with in a way that paradoxically SHOULD mean it's safer in a game like this#like-- okay if this was ACTUALLY as dangerous as it feels we wouldn't BE here on session six. does that make sense?#like when justin had us encounter a lich at level two in session three and I was immediately like OH okay he must have a plan here.#clearly some Scripted Plot is going to happen because there's no other reason he would put us up against a lich three sessions in. you know?#we started dying immediately and I was not afraid at all as a player because I trust justin wouldn't do that for no reason#or be so stupid to have that happen accidentally#THIS CAMPAIGN HOWEVER.... I DON'T TRUST LIKE THAT!!!#ARE WE GONNA FOR REAL PERMADIE BECAUSE YOU WASTED ALL OF OUR RESOURCES ON A RANDOM ENCOUNTER FIRST AND YOU DIDN'T THINK ABOUT THAT#ARE WE GONNA FOR REAL PERMADIE BECAUSE YOU DIDN'T REALIZE WE COULD USE THE ITEM YOU GAVE US TO OPEN THIS DOOR WITH A 5TH LEVEL SPELL#I WANNA PLAY IN THE SPACE BUT IT DOESN'T FEEL LIKE THERE'S ROOM FOR RISKTAKING WHERE THE BAD OUTCOMES WOULDN'T BE UNFUN CATASTROPHIC#AAAAUUUUGHHH#[shaking him violently] what do you mean that random encounter was a deadly encounter again what do you MEEEAAN#'oh huh this fight's taking longer than I thought' THEIR AC IS 19 AND THEY'RE RESISTANT TO NONMAGIC DAMAGE??#THE WATER WIERD KEEPS DISAPPEARING BACK INTO THE POND WHERE IT'S INVISIBLE??? MY BROTHER IN CHRIST HOW DID YOU EXPECT US TO DO IT FAST#hhhhhHHHH!!!!#I SHOULD BE THINKING AND TALKING ABOUT HOW COOL THE SECOND HALF OF THE SESSION GENUINELY WAS BUT I'M TOO STRESSED TO HAVE FUN#cannot stress enough that I'm in a million campaigns and I never have this problem with other DMs or with Highly Dangerous DnD Situations#melliwyk's party are in mortal peril constantly and it's... reaching a point where it's tiresome for how badly it's wearing on the PCs#but it rarely feels unfun stressful as a player playing a game#I never feel like the DM is about to accidentally end the whole campaign by bumblefucking us into a TPK at random#you know? it's different. this just feels unmanageable
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dairyfreenugget · 10 months ago
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(Going insane boinkinh one AU in my head)
Hey hey hey
May I interest you in
(Slowly slides my FaaF AU towards you but void just Disappears without a trace one day before the accolade)
Teehee
#thylacines can talk#faaf au#i love this au very yummy. a very fun twist on how Flower's dynamic with their parents would progress afterwards#the vessels live but the void exits their bodies in quite a violent manner (extreme pain and literally throwing up an entire person worth of#void). Flower was on guard duty and theyre found barely conscious in a pool of rapidly evaporating void. passes out seconds later#PK also had the displeasure of experiencing extene pain and burning as void forced its way out through his skin <3 And his moulds all melted#and evaporated. after the initial shock wears off theyre hit with “Oh No#the vessel“ and rush to find them. Well somebody else was already looking for the royal pair about this#Flower wakes up dazed and in pain in their father's workshop. their stomach hurts their throat burns and they feel lightheaded. the entire#place is considerably brighter than they remember and in they can hear two faint voices in the background but theyre too preoccupied with#examining their now pure white hand in shock to focus on anything else. until they hear their mother say “My wyrm they're awake” and#suddenly their parents are by their side. Now the two have no idea what void leaving their body might have done to them. Are they still#hollow? are they still dead? do they understand anything are they sentient? or was what was done pernament even without the void? do they#have the mind of a child if their sentience was restored? or do they remember anything? So WL stays by their side and helps them sit up#while their father goes to grab his tools. She's trying to keep them calm and comfort them but theyre still too disoriented to pay her much#attention. Until their father checks their breathing and they yelp audibly from the cool metal contacting their skin and suddenly they seem#much more alert. theyve never experienced true coldness before. PK quickly apologises and tries to be gentler with them. Theyre breathing#properly and they have a heartbeat. And he just pauses for a long while just. listening to their heart beating. Many emotions to be had#after the exam's over he asks them point blank how theyre feeling. And Flower looks up at him still seeming a little disoriented. and then#they lower their hand to their stomach and mutter 'My tummy hurts...a-and my throat burns'. It's to be expected after the way the void#left their body. so he goes to grab them some water and meds and they also ask for food and a mirror. And after he returns they just stare#at themself in the mirror and pull on their bangs for a while then blurt out 'I have your eyes' when PK asks if everything's okay. And he#and he almost chokes up as he replies 'Yeah...Yeah you do'. Flower eventually spins a lie that they remember everything but its all distant#and blurry. Like they were not aware until now. They figured it'd be better to not break their hearts#And now the three have to figure out how to be a family while PK is also scrambling to find a new solution to the infection#oops i meant to only give a brief rundown in the tags which is why it was in the tags. but i got too invested KDHDKFB
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wiklm · 1 year ago
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hi guys omg i have ocs!!! i have more but these are the ones i’m the most mentally ill about
introducing finnick (white hair!! my oc), alf (black hair w/ purple streaks!! close friend’s oc ) and aadhira (purple hair!! my oc + finnicks niece!!) the close friend and i share joint custody of all three of them. they are my sillies and i adore them so i’m here is all of the art i’ve made of them in the last couple months that i deem worthy of tumblr.com
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
they go in order from most recent to oldest!!!
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thebigqueer · 5 months ago
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literlaly terirble night last night
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goldenwaves · 1 year ago
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sometimes i wish i played asa in my longer running dnd group cause then i could be crazy about her with them because she’s definitely my most fun and favorite dnd character ive ever played and i loveeee her and i have no one to talk to about her that actually is in the sessions with her </3
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no1ryomafan · 7 months ago
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Thinking about the idea of a casshern au that’s specifically a new take that’s closer to the original but uses the sins characters as if I’ll have time to make that/develop it given “I had a au like that for Jeeg and even Kikaider but it went nowhere + now I’m working on a actual big project so I can’t do anything else until it’s done which will take a few years at my rate”
but yknow? It’s fun to rotate concepts.
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rorsry · 1 year ago
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watched uhh dorothy returns ro wizard of oz (2013) and i'd give it a 6.5/10 in general but entertainment wise i'd give it an 8.5 (tbf i was watching it with my brother idk how i'd rate it if i was alone) theres a part where they need a boat and dorothy snaps a piece of wood off a tree who yells in pain and then every tree there starts throwing rocks and acorns at her but then it cuts to a tree hunched over and hes like "take me... take me." and i csnt properly explain why it's so unbelievably funny. the line delivery makes him sound so accepting like he's really willing to die to help dorothy get a boat and i can't stop thinking about it
#also watched dino king. uh. 29 minutes in my brother and i thought it was gonna end soon so we paused and saw we still had an hour left#and we both visibly went HUH??? and i was like are we gonna power through this movie or watch khumba......and he chose to power through#for a dinosaur movie it's not bad i actually really like what they tried going for? ie using footage of real landscape and cgi-ing dinos#in it to make it seem like it's Real Life. obviously the cgi is so very noticable but they did pretty good👍🏼#when speckles (main character) fell into water instead of cgi-ing the water the dropped something irl but put his model over ir#which i find neat i didnt think they'd do that. kinda sad at the lack of blood when the dinos would kill each other#also speckles' family dies which i expected and when the timeskip happens and he finds a girl and then she dies i expected however i did no#expect them to kill two out of three kids like i'm glad junior survived but god damn after the first one died i was hoping the last two#would survive at the very least. also fuck one eyed i thought he was just survivng at first but no he literally started beef#with a one year old dinosaur baby and decided Yeah Im Gonna Ruin Your Life Forever Buddy#my brother and i when speckles finally kills one eyed: yoooo YOOOOOO#movie would have heen better with like 98% more blood but when they did sue blood they used both cgi and fake irl#which i'll admit was kinda cool#fuck you one eye i fucking hate you#ok anywaus we tried watching khumba but didnt bc it was getting late so we watched the first 20mins and then skipped to the end#i think it wouldve been a nice movie? i have no idea but i mean i didnt hate what i saw#if you guys rver wanna watch a movie just got to free with ads on youtube ive been obsessing over those for months now#btw dino movies are very boring to me i forgot to add that. so yeah dino king IS boring to me but i had fun
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