#like i get updating loretta

[sakuramisthaven]

KissMaryKill with moorland npcs.

It's ok nonnie you can say fuck on tumblr.

Fuck: It seems like a hard question but im saying,, Tan. She is so cute, IDK.

Marry: Loretta, I don't need to explain myself there.

Kill: this is also tough for me, I like em all? I'd say, kill Stacy... she has important quest updates along with the other npc bobcats and didn't get updated with tan or loretta.

[lookninjas]

How many times have I watched the Oscars version of "I'm Just Ken"? It doesn't matter. Have a bad song description poll!

Pick a song based on a bad song description. You do not have to recognize the song, although some will likely be recognizable. But just pick whatever appeals -- maybe it's the one that's funniest to you, or most relatable, or the one that best describes the type of Ken doll you'd find face down in the dirt next to a squashed lemon.

At the end of the poll, I will create a playlist based on the voting, in order from the least popular song to the most popular song. If you would like to be tagged when the playlist comes out, please leave a comment or put it in the tags when you reblog it (you are going to reblog it, right?) Also, if you desperately want to know what a song is and you don't want to wait a week, you can send me an ask and I will answer.

Have fun! Feel the Kenergy! Pass me a black napkin!

Update: Everyone now has their own Ken poster and that post is here. If you want to get visual clues to each song, or if you just want to see what those came out looking like.

[lemotmo]

She responded 🤣

Q. Ali! Now can we say they're trolling? Please let us call it trolling now!? Holy shit!

Q. I desperately need to hear you try to make this sound professional 🤣🤣🤣. I freaking love him!

Q. Ryan said wah cry more 😂😂

A. Okay I had to watch it several times because I didn't quite believe it on my first watch. For starters it is a genuinely funny video. The part about only introducing him to like 4 people and just calling everyone else extra absolutely took me out. Genius. I don't think he shared it with cruel intentions. I think he honestly thought it was funny and that most of the people who follow him would find it funny. Having said that though I don't think he actually cares if it offends anyone. And he shouldn't care. Things have been uncomfortable and unfortunate for Oliver but what they attempted to do to Ryan was grotesque and indefensible. If anyone has the right to be over their bullshit it's him. Oliver is getting hate from them because he doesn't ship it and doesn't appear to be friendly with Lou. Ryan is getting hate because he's the one Oliver prefers and he plays the character the audience prefers. That's it. That's what they're so upset about and for that reason, and only that reason they tried to assassinate his character.

Everything that we have seen, heard and experienced over the last 3 months would not have happened if his name was Loretta instead of Lou and he was playing a Tammy instead of a Tommy. The entire thing has been endlessly ridiculous and entirely exhausting. If we're this over the entire thing imagine how over it Oliver and Ryan are. He's going to appear in some capacity in season 8. They're going to get to see him for at least a bit. They need to take what they get and let the rest go. He was never going to be treated like or added as a main. It's not our fault they decided to believe proven liars instead of facts directly presented to them. If the cast wants to have a little fun over how stupid the entire situation is, then more power to them. And it was a truly funny video. Voodoo dolls and all 😂

Thank you Nonny for dropping this in my inbox. :)

As for the rest of this post? I agree with all of it. :D

It's a genuinly funny video. He shouldn't be afraid to post it, because some fans might not like it. He is free to post whatever he wants to post.

¯\_ (ツ)_/¯

IMPORTANT! Please don't repost this ask and/or a link that leads straight to my Tumblr account on Twitter or any other social media. Thank you!

Heads up! For anyone who is giving me the shifty eyes for reposting Ali's updates instead of reblogging. Read this.

Remember, no hate in comments, reblogs or inboxes. Let's keep it civil and respectful. Thank you.

If you are interested in more of Ali’s posts, you can find all of her posts so far under the tag: anonymous blog I love.

[lady-bess]

Fallout - Chapter 8 "Back to Basics"

Jack Daniels x F!Reader Explicit/18+ (Minors DNI please) Chapter Word Count: 6.4k Chapter Tags: Trauma response, description of training, description of weaponry, use of a gun, PTSD/Trauma flashbacks, traumatic reaction, grounding, slight intimacy, description of wounds/scars, beginning of a friendship, drinking, eluding to being drunk at times (sensibly).

Series Masterlist | A03 Link | Tumblr Masterlist

<- Previous Chapter (Ch. 7 - "An Encounter")

Training Jack proved to be somewhat difficult - especially when he finally had a weapon placed back in his hands.

A/N: Thinking of changing the artwork for this series...thoughts? Also I'm officially scrapping an upload schedule. I started this as an every Wednesday idea, but I've found it too restrictive. I'm now just going to upload whenever I had a chapter ready! It'll still be regularly that this series gets updated, but that just gives me a bit more freedom!

Your time spent in the bar after work was somewhat different to how you first imagined it to be. Rather than the tipsy affair you had in your head, instead you opted for nursing a whiskey while plotting what training you could offer Jack. You swilled the contents of the glass around briefly as you contemplated what you had planned, your eyes scanning over scrawled notes littering the book you’d been using, before you were joined by a familiar southern drawl. 

“How’s it coming along?” Tequila had asked as he slid into the booth with you, a cold beer in hand. He took a swig of the drink as he got himself settled in next to you as you both awaited the rest of your party to join.

“I think I’ve got it nailed down. Here,” you pushed your notepad over towards Tequila, “have a look and see what you think?”. 

Tequila took another swig from his bottle before setting it down on a coaster and turning his attention to the book you’d been jotting down notes in all evening. Although your meeting with Jack was brief, combined with what Tequila had already told you about his rehabilitation after Jack had left had given you a good framework to start plotting with. You knew before Tex had given you more information that this would have to be a very different training plan, but you hadn’t anticipated just how different. 

Time. That was going to be the main difference - even in spite of the fact Jack had been a very well respected, and highly trained, agent for so many years, there was not an element of this that you could rush. Normally your goal was to get recruits to a high standard as fast as possible, and as you only ever dealt with the weapons training it was simple for you to streamline the process. All your training could be simplified as the more you practise, the better you get.

But Jack would have to be different. The kind of trauma he had faced over his life, totally unchecked too, made you take a different approach. You wouldn’t even dare put a weapon in his hands for a few weeks at least, and only would on the advice of Loretta. 

Tequila nodded slowly as he read over your notes, following the words with his finger - an endearing trait about Tex you’d picked up on when he told you about his dyslexia, and the struggles he sometimes had when it came to the admin side of his job. He’d found ways to make it work for him, and never didn’t turn in his reports, but there were still times you’d see him struggle. Your handwriting probably didn’t help, either…

“Looks good, London,” he said, smiling as he handed you the book back, “are you gonna start training him right away?” he asked. You nodded, placing your ribbon page marker into the book before closing the cover and tucking the book back in your bag. 

“No point delaying things. I imagine Jack’ll want to get going soon anyway. Sounds like he’s been itching to get back out there,” you said, returning to nursing your drink. Tequila chuckled as he took a sip of his drink. 

“You’re not wrong there. For months he was fine, and didn’t want to really think about it. But these last few weeks he’s turned a corner and there’s been a huge shift in him - and for the better, too. He’ll be pleased to know you’ll want to start immediately.” 

You smiled at Tex, finishing the last of your drink. 

“It’s good to have you back. I missed you; we all did,” you said. He pulled you in for a side hug, squeezing you tight into his solid frame. He planted a soft kiss in your hair, then released you. 

“I missed you too, kid.”

You’d spent the rest of that evening catching up with Tequila, finding out about his life in the UK with Astrid, who when she joined the table the two of you both almost broke down in tears after finally being reunited. She coddled you in her arms and it was like no time had passed at all - suddenly it was over two years ago,  the night before you found out where you were being stationed, and the two of you were drunkenly hugging like your lives depended on it. 

Tequila and Astrid would be staying States-side for a while, but that didn’t stop the two of you treating that night like you’d never see each other again. By the time the morning rolled around, and you peeled yourself off your bed, you cursed the fact you’d let Astrid talk you into three rounds of shots to finish the night off. Getting up to brew a pot of coffee, you thanked your lucky stars you’d told Jack to not meet you until the afternoon, and opted to type up his training plan from your work laptop at home so you could at the very least nurse your hangover in the comfort of your sweatpants and no bra. 

Jack’s training plan was a solid one, and this was probably the most thought you’d ever put into a recruit’s programme. Which sounded bad, given that for over a year it had been your job to train the next generation of recruits - but Jack was complicated, he wasn’t a fresh slate like so many who walked in through the doors of your office. There were so many adjustments you needed to make before you could confidently loosen the reins with him like your other students, even if he did technically have more experience than you in this line of work. 

The major adjustment you’d had to make with him was significantly dialling back on the combat and weapons side of things. Having spoken to both Tex and Loretta to get an idea of the kind of rehab programme he’d been undertaking, it was clear that the very last thing you should consider was putting a weapon in his hand. Which was something you knew anyway, but after re-reading his therapy notes once the caffeine hit your system that morning, you thought twice about also getting him involved in physical combat. 

That afternoon, once you’d made yourself look somewhat presentable, you’d started at ground level with Jack, and so began the next two months of you being his 1-on-1 trainer. Meeting at your office, he’d then been given a tour to the site as if he were a fresh-faced twenty-something who had been poached by Statesman, with no prior secret service training under his belt. He’d met all his new colleagues, some of whom he already knew , and learnt about all the recent developments that had happened since he’d been taken off active duty. 

Then, the admin work. How you didn’t pull your hair out with him you’d never quite understand - for a man who had been in a job literally engulfed with technology for the best part of two decades, it was like watching a fawn how to walk on ice when it came to him getting to grips with the new system and the way in which things were filed. Long gone were the days of brown envelopes containing classified information, a system he was so comfortable with, and in with digital. 

After the twelfth consecutive training day of getting him used to the system, you almost lost your rag at him. You were behind on your own paperwork now, with Jack’s training slowly becoming to the detriment of your own cases. At just turned four o’clock one afternoon, with your head in your hands, you grumbled at him. 

“How did you manage before?” you’d asked, genuinely curious how he’d gotten by if he was this shit with technology. He’d just shrugged, wiping his hands across his face in equal frustration at the fact he couldn’t grasp it. 

“I’d had assistants for years! I never needed to worry about any of this shit,” he’d said, which suddenly answered a lot of your questions. 

Jack was the biggest pain in your ass you’d ever known. You thought that for someone who had been given a second chance at life that he might be a little more grateful to the training you were giving him – and in the discreet manner in which you were giving it. Jack didn’t make it easy for you; for as much as you were happy with the cover story that he was brand new to Statesman, the former senior agent spent a fair bit of his time out chatting to other colleagues in a way where it was very obvious he clearly had a past with the company.

But still, you persevered. Sticking to your word, you didn’t tell anyone who he really was, even when you were asked about it. Schmidt had enquired about him on a few occasions.

“Tex says he’s new, but I’m not convinced y’know. Is there more to it?” he’d asked one afternoon you’d gone to get coffees. You’d just shrugged it off, answering with a non-committal, “Not that I’ve been told”.

But in spite of how much you wanted to ring his fucking neck some days, Jack gradually got the hand of it. He saw how much effort you’d put in, and when he’d noticed you not leaving your office one night just to catch up on your own work, he’d seen the sacrifice you were making to your own caseload just to make sure that he was getting the training he’d needed. 

Filled with guilt, he’d brought you a latte that next morning ( with an extra shot of espresso) , and had started pulling extra hours himself to make sure he had it nailed. He would repeat anything he didn’t understand time and time again until he cracked it. You found him one night cooped up in the library by himself in the corner, desperately typing away on a laptop. The smallest quip of a grin could be seen on his face, and you slinked away that evening with a sense of pride that he’d finally started getting it. 

After that night, spending time with Jack slowly got more tolerable. You’d be lying if you said that the two of you hadn’t got off to a rocky start - he was someone who had been so used to getting any privileges handed to him on a silver platter, and now for the first time in years he was actually having to work for it. It had obviously ground his gears, and he’d resented you somewhat while he was getting to grips with everything anew. As his training officer, you became the face of all his misfortune, in his mind you were the reason that he wasn’t progressing faster. 

But once he got over himself and let his ego calm down, he started to see that none of this was your fault, and instead you were doing everything in your power to help speed this along. In a way he started to admire you - how you held yourself, how kind you were, and how far you had come with Statesman in such a short amount of time. The two of you might have still butted heads from time to time, but on the whole it was getting to be a much more amicable relationship the two of you had. 

Finally, Jack started making progress in leaps and bounds. Not only was he finally getting the hand of filing the paperwork, and making record time for some of it now after hours of practice, but Loretta had finally cleared him for using firearms. 

“There ain’t a guarantee he’s totally ready. There never will be, child. But his sessions have been the most positive since I met the guy. I’d say it’s worth a try ,” she’d said. 

You were nervous about the prospect of Jack handling a weapon - you’d read his file and knew what a marksman he used to be, and how he could handle himself in seemingly any situation. Of all the agents who were serving with the organisation at the time of his accident, Jack had suffered the fewest injuries across the entire team, even in spite of how long he had worked here. There was a part of you who worried that he’d try and relive his glory days, and go too far too soon, and you wouldn’t be able to stop him. 

But you trusted Loretta, and if she said his sessions were becoming more positive, and that this was worth trialling, you had no reason to not believe her. She was an honest woman, worth her weight in salt, and would never suggest Jack do something if she didn’t think he was ready to take on the challenge from a mental standpoint. 

So, just over two months after your formal introduction, you were finally in the weapons department. Jack marvelled at how the room had changed since his time in here last - even though this is where the two of you had met, he hadn’t really paid much attention to what this room was like. His focus had more so been pinned on the woman in a waistcoat who was to be his training officer for the foreseeable future… 

There were so many safety features installed here in comparison to when he was last in here for official training duties. He swallowed a lump in his throat as he took in the dozens of additional locks and biometric keypads that now covered the cases of weapons and internal doors to the weapons room, a clear indicator of what went wrong with him. 

You let him have a session just getting used to the feel of the weapons room now - even if Loretta had said he could try the weapons, you were in no hurry to put a gun in his hand on the first day. You’d been strict about it, locking away all bullets and magazines behind a biometric lock tailored to you before his session had even begun, just to make sure that he couldn’t suddenly flip a switch and go all trigger-happy. 

But to your great relief, he didn’t. He happily took in his new surroundings, made notes as to the newer weapons that had come in since his time, as well as just get a feel for what a gun felt like again. 

Jack smiled taut down at the small silver revolver, engraved with Statesman’s ‘S’ on the leather handle. It was not all too dissimilar to the kind of pistols he once carried. It was almost bittersweet to handle them once again, and you stood back and watched how he reacted to having them in his grasp once more. 

“You alright?” you’d asked him. Jack had simply nodded, caressing the metal with his thumb gently, before putting them back in their allocated holder. 

“Yes, ma’am. With your permission, I think I’d be ready for us to start using them in training, if you saw fit,” he’d said. 

Truthfully, you no longer had a reason to say no. Loretta had cleared him, and after a couple of sessions where any and all ammunition had been under lock and key, you were satisfied that he was as ready as he could be to start that part of the training now. 

So, you agreed. 

But when it came to those sessions, you were instantly regretting your decisions. For the first time in weeks you were seeing the cockier side of Jack again, the side you’d come to learn  would come out in a situation when he thought he was the only person who could know the answer. It wasn’t very often he would drag up his prior stint with the agency in a session with you, mainly due to the risk of someone overhearing who was not meant to know anything about his former moniker. But also because he’d agreed, along with yourself, Champ, and Loretta, that he’d likely fare better if he didn’t focus on what once was, and instead only looked forward to what would be. 

You weren’t sure what exactly got into him this morning to make him such a colossal ass , but you had no fucking patience for it anymore. You were almost ready to call the session to an early close, but after making him wait for so long to give this a go, you figured you owed it to your student to at least let him have a go. 

That didn’t mean he remotely appreciated your generosity. 

“I know how to hold a fuckin’ gun, Mimosa,” Jack said, anger evident in his tone and an annoyance seeping in. You rolled your eyes ( for the fifteenth time this session, you might add ) and sighed as Jack gripped the handle on the pistol. 

“You used to know, Seltzer,” you said, earning you a disapproving grunt from the former senior agent. You knew it pissed him off no end to be called by anything other than Jack, or Whiskey, but that was a title his own stupidity has forfeited. You’d happily remind him of that whenever he so needed it - it helped to bring him down a little bit, you found. Normally you’d call him Jack, but today you couldn’t be fucking bothered with his childish attitude. 

“Stop callin’ me that,” Jack murmured under his breath as he started loading the pistol for the first round of shots. He had hoped you wouldn’t notice, but unfortunately for him your hearing was significantly sharper than what he gave you credit for.

“Seltzer, I’ll have less of that,” you said. Jack’s eyes darted up to meet yours, a flush creeping up his neck and onto his cheeks as he realised he’d been made. You couldn’t help but chuckle under your breath as you caught the agent, virtually red handed, embarrassed that he’d been found out. 

Or slightly angry. You weren’t sure. 

“Sorry,” he said coyly, breaking eye contact. He rolled his shoulders back, warming up his muscles to get into position and start firing the pistol at the target.

You furrowed your brow as you watched how he held himself, lining his body up for the shot. The muscles in his shoulders tensed all wrong, his arms weren’t bent properly, and his feet were far too close together. You leant back against the bench at the back of the room, lined with weapons and ammunition, and crossed your arms across your chest. Jack wouldn’t hurt himself if he took a shot like this, so you didn’t need to intervene from a health and safety point of view. But you wondered if he took a shot like this, which would inevitably be off-target, it might make him realise he needed more help than he imagined. 

Jack got into position, albeit the wrong one, and inhaled sharply. He knew something wasn’t right, he could feel it. The gun felt too heavy, his arms were locked up, and his body felt like it was twisting in a manner that was now foreign to him. This was something he’d done day in, day out, for over two decades. He plainly refused to accept that he’d forgotten this ability, and instead of doing the sensible thing and asking for a correction, he carried on.

Like an angry bull going after a bull rider.  

He inhaled sharply and squeezed the trigger, releasing a bullet from the barrel, his breath never exhaling as he took the shot. The sensation of the bullet flying out the barrel careered up Jack’s arms and left a shaking feeling coursing round his body, his muscles still locked up and not releasing even once the bullet was out from the barrel. Time seemed to slow down as he watched the bullet fly out across the room, and avoid the target completely. 

Jack sighed at the miss, but what frightened him more than the disappointment that he’d failed was the feeling he was left with after. Not anger, not frustration - but anxiety. Even long after the sound from the shot firing had ceased ricocheting around the bunker the two of you were in, the noise continued to ring in his ear. 

The pitch of the bullet ringing around in his head got louder and more high pitched with every passing moment, and he screwed up his eyes to try and make it go away. It felt like the beginning of a sharp migraine piercing through his skull, and he’d not felt pain like this in a long time. It all concentrated near his temple, where the scar from his accident stood prevalent. 

A few seconds after the failed shot, you looked to Jack and saw that he wasn’t making any effort to move. Not just to get into a better position, but to do anything. He wasn’t reloading the gun, he looked as though he was barely breathing; the only thing that was moving was his face, which was painted with a pained expression. 

“Seltzer?” you said, pushing off the bench to step closer to him. He still held his position, but you could see that something else was taking over control over his body. 

He didn’t respond to your voice. Truthfully, he didn’t hear it. The ringing of the gunshot ran around his head, bouncing off the sides of his mind and sending a piercing shriek through him. Jack grunted, faltering on his stance, and fumbled with his weapon slightly as he tried not to drop it from the pain the noise brought him. He panted, quickly flicking the gun to have its safety mechanism on, before dropping it to the ground in a panic. 

“ Jack ?!” you said, now actually worried. At the use of his real name he seemed to snap out of whatever haze he was in, and his eyes darted around to meet yours. Your heart shattered as you looked in them, and all you could see reflected back was fear. 

“I- that’s never- I don’t know-,” he stammered, his mouth dry and making it almost impossible for him to form a coherent sentence. You unfurled your arms from across your chest and went up to him, reaching out and gently placing your hands around his trigger hand to comfort him. 

Jack shook throughout his body, and beneath your palms you felt every nervous quake which ran down through to his fingers. You gently applied some pressure, trying your best to ground him, employing techniques you’d picked up at MI5 for trauma responses within your colleagues. You’d all seen some shit in your time, and it had become rather useful you’d found. 

Jack closed his eyes, his ears still ringing and the world around him spinning while he stood in place. His heart thudded in his chest and he could hear every beat as blood rushed through his ears. He found himself clinging to you like a lifeline, finding that your touch was the only thing keeping him from completely spiralling. 

With your other hand, you softly interlocked your fingers with his which rested by his side. His hand gripped yours tighter and you watched as he screwed up his eyes to try and calm himself, his breaths deep and steady. With a gentle voice, and getting closer so that you could speak in just a whisper, you spoke. 

“You’re alright, Jack. I’ve got you,” you said. He had no reason to trust you yet on a deeper level, aside from the fact you’d kept the secret about his identity for over two years. But in this one act alone he learned more about you than he perhaps knew about some of his colleagues whom he’d been working with for several years. He’d spiralled a few times over these last two years, and had to learn on his own how best to bring himself back to square one - but perhaps with you by his side, that might be easier. He never imagined that somebody else might be able to quell his troubled mind in any way, let alone how he so desperately needed. 

Slowly, the grip Jack had on you began to loosen, and his eyes opened. You smiled softly up at him, never once letting go of him as he regulated his breathing and began to calm down. He shot you a watery smile once he was calm anew, and you felt him trying to retract from your grip. You let him, pulling your hands away. 

“You alright?” you asked, letting his hands slide out from yours. Jack nodded. 

“Yeah, I- I think so. I’m sorry, ‘bout that…,” he said, looking almost perplexed as to what had just happened. You smiled softly and tipped your head towards a bench at the side of the training room, notioning for him to join you. He followed you to the bench and watched you remove your Stetson, setting it down on the seat to your left, before beckoning for him to take the one on your left. 

“When did you last fire a gun, Jack?” you asked. He shrugged, then sighed. He took his own hat off now, revealing the head of thick brown hair beneath it - albeit slightly more grey at the roots than what you recall from seeing in that photograph of him just over a decade ago. 

“On the day I got injured. One of the last things I heard was gunfire, before I-,” he sighed, again, “-yeah…”. 

“I’m sorry, Jack. Tequila eventually gave me the details of what happened that day,” you said, looking up at him. It was then, without his hat on and so close to you, that you saw the scar on his temple. You gently raised your hand and brushed your fingertips over the scar, and Jack grimaced as you did. Deep down he didn’t hate how the feeling of your soft touch was on his skin, but he couldn’t show such weakness. Not when he was trying all he could to appear tough. 

He sighed solemnly, letting his tough facade slowly fade from view. Of all people, there was no point hiding this side of himself from you - you needed to know as much about how he was doing in order to help him, and he’d be damned if he was about to face setbacks all because he didn’t want his pride to get damaged. 

You retracted your hand from his scar, not wanting to draw too much attention to the area, and instead reached over to take Jack’s hand in yours. Your fingers softly slid between his, but it was Jack who responded with a tightening grip. 

He smiled faintly down at your intertwined hands, the feeling now so foreign to him. It had been a long time since anyone had shown Jack physical affection, and even longer since that affection felt like it came from a place of love and care. After his wife passed he’d not wanted anything with women beyond meaningless hookups, and the second things began to feel more intimate, he’d shut things down. On a couple of occasions he’d entertained the idea, but those relationships never lasted longer than a few months, and as soon as he felt as though she cared more for him than he felt he deserved , he ended things. 

So something as simple as having his hand held, while completely clothed, was almost bizarre. But he noted, as he watched your fingers softly curl around his, and your thumb caress the back of his, that he didn’t hate the way this felt. 

“Thank you, Mimosa,” he said softly, “You’re a credit to this organisation, you know?”.

“Yeah?” you asked, turning to now look at Jack. He turned his head and smiled at you, a pair of deep brown eyes boring into you and making you feel warm and comforted from the inside. Even though it was you who was helping him right now, you yourself took comfort in the gentleness that was reflected back at you. 

“Yes. Tequila really undersold you,” he chuckled. You rolled your eyes, not remotely surprised. 

“Oh jeez, do I want to know what he said about me though?” you giggled, and Jack laughed with you now. 

“Only good things, Mimosa. I promise!” he explained. 

“Yeah, that’s what I’m worried about,” you snorted. 

“Oh, stop,” Jack chuckled, his hand gripping yours tighter, “I very much got the impression that the two of you enjoy winding each other up. So for him to still be able to sing your praises? Yeah, I trusted that he meant every word. And he wasn’t wrong; not about a single thing.” 

“Thank you, Jack. That means a lot to hear,” you smiled. 

Jack nodded, then cleared his throat and loosened his grip on your hand. He’d calmed down enough now that he felt as though he could clear up in here for the day, and didn’t want to burden you any longer with his feeling of not being alright. He’d make a point to go and see Loretta after your session, he thought, and as you let him retract his hand from yours, both of you grabbed your stetsons and stood up. 

“You feelin’ better?” you asked, and Jack nodded, putting his hat back on his head. 

“Yes, ma’am. I’m gonna head and see Loretta before our next session, just to go over today. But I think for now I’m gonna have to throw the towel in,” he smiled. “Sorry.”

“No need to apologise,” you said, shaking your head. “This was always going to be a strange adjustment, and a big step to take. See Loretta, and perhaps next session we’ll do more work in weapons that don’t involve guns.” 

“Sounds like a plan. Got anything in mind?” he asked. You grinned, looking over to one of the wall panels which was filled with ropes and lassos. 

“I might have some ideas cooking up, yeah,” you chuckled. 

Jack followed your gaze to the cabinet, and he would be lying if he said he didn’t get a twinge of excitement at the thought of gripping a lasso again. It was one of the parts of his job that he missed the most, the power that came from being so nimble with a whip or lasso. 

He noticed, as he turned back to look at you, the way your fingers danced over the handle of your own whip. He’d seen it before, but he grinned as he watched you fiddle with it, he noticed it was a very similar model to the one he once owned. The way the small switch stood out on the end, signifying yours would turn electric at a moment’s notice, had a buzz go through Jack at the thought of you using it. 

He’d been wanting to ask for a few weeks why you chose that weapon - it wasn’t exactly conventional when he made the choice, and with the amount of technological advancements that had come along since his time he very much doubted that it was any more preferable now. You turned back to look at him and were greeted with a cheeky grin, a far cry to the face of the man who you had just seen almost broken not ten minutes before you. You furrowed your eyebrows in curiosity, and folded your arms across your chest in defence.

“What made you decide to have a whip as your signature weapon, by the way?” he asked, that playful smirk never diminishing. 

Ah, fuck. Busted. 

You cleared your throat, a warmth dancing across your cheeks at the reality you were now faced with. You knew that your decision to carry this weapon out of slight admiration was bound to come up one day, but you had hoped it would be much further down the line than this. You began trying to pace away from Jack, your feet moving towards the door. 

But something stopped you. 

Jack reached out and placed his hand on your arm, effectively stopping you in your tracks. Now you were really done for. You dared to make eye contact with the cowboy again, and butterflies swirled in your stomach as you did. 

“Well? Come on, don’t keep me waitin’. I don’t know many that would choose such a weapon. Colour me intrigued!” he said. 

You rolled your eyes, but chuckled to yourself. You figured there was no better time than the present to rip this bandaid off, anyway…

“Fine, fine! Twist my arm, why don’t you,” you began, clearing your throat and inhaling sharply before continuing. 

“I read your file before I knew about you from Tequila, and your stats impressed me immensely. Your success rate, how little you got injured, and the kind of missions you were involved with. From a professional standpoint, I admired the work you did,” you said. “And then I finally got the chance to speak to Tex about you. He told me so much about you, but one detail that always stood out was your choice of weapon. I’ll admit, I was intrigued.”

“Really?!” Jack said, dropping his hand from your arm and replacing playful smirk for a smile of genuine joy. You chuckled as you watched him, slightly giddy, at the prospect that you might have for a second been inspired by him.  

“Yes, really . I couldn’t get my head around the benefit of a weapon like this,” you gestured to the whip by tapping the handle that was hooked to your hip, “But I was interested in finding out. So, on the downlow, I had my training officer show me the way with one”. 

“Who was your T.O?” Jack asked, the two of you now heading towards the exit. 

“Eve. She’s just got back from a prolonged, and well deserved, break. Have you ever worked with her?” you asked. Jack smiled and nodded.

“Yes, I’ve had the pleasure. Does explain a whole lot about you and your training style though, given she shaped you into an agent.”

“She’s the best. I’ve missed her these last couple of months, but it’s been nice to not be worried about her getting injured recently,” you said. Jack shrugged before opening the door for you, allowing you to step out of the weapons room, then followed by him. 

“I wouldn’t be so sure. From what I recall Eve seemed to have a knack for getting herself into a pickle even when she wasn’t working!”. 

You laughed to yourself as you locked the weapons room door behind the two of you, turning the key in the lock and then entering the code 719002 into the door. He wasn’t wrong about Eve - even if he hadn’t worked with her for a couple of years, his assessment was alarmingly accurate. She was the best agent you’d ever worked with, but her ability to get caught up in minor self-inflicted accidents was almost comical. 

“You’re not wrong, I’ve seen her trip over thin air before,” you said, still giggling. Jack laughed with you, and then softened as you turned to look at him. 

“Thank you, for today. And for your patience in general. I know I haven’t been the easiest agent to train,” Jack said. You chuckled. 

“You can say that again,” you told him, winking playfully as you tucked the key to the weapons room in the inner pocket of your jacket. 

“Sorry,” he winced. 

“It’s nothing, Jack. You’re a pain in my ass, but… I’m coming to like having to deal with your… quirks ,” you chuckled. 

“ Quirks ?!” he said, not able to hold back a laugh. 

“Yes, quirks! You’re bloody impossible sometimes!”. 

Jack laughed with you, then shook his head in amusement. He knew you weren’t wrong, and that he had been reluctant to some of the changes which had been made recently, but every day he was grateful for the attention and devotion you showed him. 

“Okay, okay, fine . I’ll admit it!” he said, raising his hands as though he was in surrender. You giggled, playfully patting the side of his right rib cage gently as a physical way of telling him to knock it off. 

Jack smiled down at you, feeling totally relaxed in your presence. There hadn’t been many instances in the last two years where he’d felt like he was genuinely calm, or at peace. But something about this friendship that was blossoming between the two of you made him feel like nothing had ever gone awry, and that life wasn’t perfect. 

He had to drop his arms down to his sides fairly quickly, as he found the longer he stayed fooling around with you like this, the more he had the urge to pull you in for a huge hug. Something told him that you might not be totally against that, given the fact you’d already not shied away from using physical touch with him where needed, but that was a line he knew he shouldn’t cross. 

“Go see Loretta, Jack. And have tomorrow off, or use it for database study. I don’t want to overwhelm you given today,” you said. Jack nodded. 

“Yes, ma’am. I’ll let you know when I’ve had my session,” he said. 

“Thank you. I’ll liaise with Champ and Tequila, and let them know about this too. You just get yourself some rest,” you insisted. 

“Thank you, Mimosa. I’ll see you soon,” he smiled, and then the two of you parted ways, heading off into respective parts of the building for the rest of the afternoon.

Even in spite of the drawback Jack had faced today, he was able to walk away optimistic, and with a spring in his step. He knew he still had a long way to go, and the hours he’d need to put into it would be nothing short of monumental. But with you as his T.O, he could actually begin to imagine his life after this was over. 

A second chance. Not one he ever thought he’d deserved, but one he was slowly beginning to earn. 

Series Masterlist | A03 Link | Tumblr Masterlist

Next Chapter (Ch. 9 - "Collision") ->

Like this work? Support the writers you love with reblogs and comments! 💕

[kissesandarsenic]

hello loretta. :) its the shy sub who wrote the words on his body, back for an update... they washed off soon after in the shower, so now im free!! and no one even saw them, so no humiliation for me! you won't ever catch me like that again!

it's not like my mind is fuzzy and tired and can be easily persuaded to do even more exposing things for everyone despite my best efforts to resist...

-🧠

Secretly, you're disappointed no-one saw the words, aren't you?

You wanted someone to see. You wanted them to figure out exactly what you are (a needy boytoy) and what you love (to obey). They'd tease you, or use it against you. And you'd have loved every embarassing second.

So here you are, back in my asks, wanting so badly for me to order you around again, and bully you into writing more depraved things on yourself. Because it's easier to blame the big scary Domme than to admit that deep down, you liked being a brazen little slut for me.

You even want something more exposing. And I'm sitting here wondering what exactly it is that you want me to make you do, but won't say out loud.

Should I order you to get off with the windows open so anyone passing by could hear? To come off anon and send me a photo of yourself naked and presenting? To go to a public bathroom and touch yourself in one of the stalls? To write even cruder things on yourself in harder to conceal places?

There's so many posibilities for a shy baby like you. We'll just have to see if you're brave enough to tell me what it is you really want, hm?

[anonomouswriter-blr]

OuaT Peter Pan X OC (part 1 maybe)

This is just for fun y'all. This isn't a fanfic page so PLEASE don't get attached to anything I post here, there will not be frequent updates (if any). I may drop this and never post again, it's all for kicks and giggles. Even still, let me know how I can write better. xoxo

Brief Synopsis - Loretta finds herself washed up on the shores of an unfamiliar island. The friend she arrived with is nowhere to be seen, but that doesn't mean she's alone on the island.

Story starts under cut.

It’s almost like static, the sounds Loretta heard as she roused from a state of numbness. With her head pounding and body aching and cold, she blinked her eyes, slowly adjusting to the harsh light against her face. Her blinking becomes more rapid as she attempts to remove pests from her eyes. It’s not dirt, but sand. A strong scent of sea veg fills her nostrils. She begins to recognize the familiar feeling of soft waves, washing over her, returning to the sea, then over her again, ending just below her cheeks. As the sand clears from her eyes, she becomes better adjusted to the light and can see her surroundings. She had washed up on the shore of some land. Is it an island? A mainland? Is there any civilization or is she stranded?

Stranded. Stranded would mean she’s alone, but she isn’t alone. As she sat up she remembered. “Noah Reed!?” she calls out into the white light reflecting off the beach, whipping her head around in each direction. He came with her on their wrecked ship, the boy she escaped that life of responsibility with, the one who showed her what magic and true freedom could be. The one who told her about the different worlds. But that storm had separated them. Is he even on the island? What island is she on? There are no strange fruits along the shoreline to indicate if she recognizes the island from stories or pictures. The vastness of the sea isn’t helping either. Loretta stumbles to her feet, taking in her surroundings. She kicks her legs in awkward discomfort as her now dirtied white skirt sticks to her calves. “Noah Reed! Noah Reed! Noa-,”

Loretta cuts herself off as she notices the unfamiliar boy in front of her. He stands unbothered on top of the rigged rocks, cocky, as if he owned the place. “You’re not Noah,” she states blankly.

“Do I look like Noah?” the boy asks.

“If you’re going to be like that I think I’d rather you leave me be,” he raises his eyebrows at that, then holds an entertained smile.

“What’s your name?”

“That’s none of your business. How about you tell me your name?”

“That’s none of your business,” Loretta frowns, eyebrows furrowing. She looks down, spots a stick a short ways away from her, then marches towards it. “What are you doing?”

“Drawing a line in the sand,” she says as she presses the tip of the stick deep into the wet sand and drags it in a long line, separating herself from the older boy. “You stay on that side and stop bothering me,”

With that order, she turns around sharply, wet hair whipping through the air, droplets smacking her in her own face, and marches in the opposite direction for the boy, looking about the sandy shore.

“What are you looking for?” Loretta makes a noise of alarm before scowling. The boy had appeared right before her eyes.

“I thought I told you to leave me alone?” The boy says nothing, waiting for an answer. She lets out a breath of frustration, but answers all the same. “My leather satchel. It can’t be far from here,”

She walks the shoreline, the boy continuing to follow, hoping from rock to rock. He really is fast. And annoying. Like a gnat that just won’t give.

“So how did you get here anyway?” he asks her. Buzz buzz buzzing like a gnat too. Can’t he just leave her alone?

“A shipwreck,” she states plainly.

“I don’t see any ship ‘round here,”

“Because it happened in the middle of the sea, that’s why. There was a bad storm. Now won’t you please leave me alone? I really need to find my bag,”

“You mean the one over there?” Across the shore there’s a tall rock, around its base is the arm band of her satchel, the bag itself fighting against the current of the shallow waves. Without a word she runs to it, leaving imprints of her feet in her wake, the sand gathering on the hem of her skirt. She pulls the satchel up and off the rock. Dropping to her knees, she opens it, digging through its contents. “What’s in this bag that’s so important anyway?”

“A spell book,” she says, lifting up a book with a finely detailed hard cover, eyes wide in excitement and awe. It may look worn from age and seawater, but the magic inside is just as crisp and powerful as if it were still new. “Let’s see if this is the island I seek,”She flips through the pages until seemingly finding a specific one, then places the book open on the sand, her stick from earlier lying crooked against the book's binding. The boy looks quizzically as he watches her over her shoulder. Again her arm plunges into the bag and she pulls out another item, this one a spinning wooden top. Whilst reading the open pages, she mumbles to herself, holding the top over the book. She stares down the item as if waiting for something to happen, but nothing does. “Curses! It isn’t working. I must be on the wrong island, if this even is one,”

“And what island might you be looking for?”

“A place with magic. To keep us young forever and conjure things one can only hope for in my land,” Loretta raises to her feet, looking round and defeated, not knowing what to do. “I don’t even know if he’s in this place with me. Gosh, I wish I could just have a map to find him!” almost in an instant, a drawn out parchment appears in the palm of her empty hand. She looks at it with wide eyes, taking it in both hands and feeling the paper to test its existence. On the piece is a mark of where she is, a large X, and a dotted trail connecting the two. “A map, exactly how I wished it. Wait…” she turns to the boy, “How did you appear in front of me so suddenly before,”

He simply shrugs. “Magic,” Loretta approaches him, looking him in the face.

“Tell me, what island is this?” he smiles at her, a mischievous smile.

“Why, this is Neverland, of course,” Loretta’s face widens with a grin, and she cheers, jumping in the air.

“We did it! We found it! Why didn’t you say something earlier! You enjoyed watching me act a fool, didn’t you?” her whole demeanor had changed. Before she held a posture of irritation towards the boy, but how she shared a fondness towards him. “Come, I still have to find Noah Reed,”

“You want me to come with you? Weren’t you just telling me to bug off before?”

“What, that? Oh, that wasn’t serious. Besides, you seem to know this island better than me. I could use your help. Now are you coming or not?” she flippantly asks, then runs towards the forests.

posted 14.Wed.Mar.2024

[seafoamstatice]

I rewatched a couple episodes of season 3 recently and now I'm wondering, what was the in universe podcast season 3 like? Mabel released one episode at the end of ep 7, there wasn't any podcast work done in ep 8 (only investigating), they take a break the five days Oliver is in the hospital, then the musical opens two days later. One of those days Charles, Oliver and Mabel are on a time crunch to get Loretta out of jail. Then they're finishing up recording of the final episode right after the opening night party.

Did Mabel record multiple episodes while packing up her entire apartment and moving out? Did the trio record multiple episodes in the two day gap (on top of interviewing Dickie, finding the sewing shop and talking to Ben's friends, going to court and bailing Loretta out, and coordinating a plan to get Donna to confess) and drop them all at once, then have one single update episode for the season finale? Is there a release schedule, and season three of the podcast is airing during season 4 of the show? Or was the season only two episodes long?

[boonesfarmsangria]

Mike Farrell Reflects on Captain B.J. Hunnicutt’s Ahead of ‘M*A*S*H’ TV Special

Scott Fishman, TV Insider Dec 21, 2023 Updated Dec 22, 2023 0

Mike Farrell knew he had a lot to live up to when he joined the 4077th Medical Corps and cast of M*A*S*H as Captain B.J. Hunnicutt. The well-versed actor already had an impressive career including a stint on Days of Our Lives. However, this was a completely different kind of pressure coming into season 4 of a highly successful series after the exit of Wayne Rogers, who played Captain “Trapper” John McIntyre.

He was up to the challenge with viewers connecting with the devoted family man and what would be a long-time bond with Alan Alda’s Captain Benjamin Franklin “Hawkeye” Pierce. Viewers will ever forget the shot during the historic series finale where B.J. yells out that he left a note for Hawkeye. As he flies away in the helicopter, he soon notices that his good friend spelled out the word “Goodbye” with rocks on the ground.

It’s these types of iconic moments and characters that are celebrated during FOX’s upcoming M*A*S*H: The Comedy That Changed Television. Executive-produced by John Scheinfeld and Andy Kaplan, this two-special delves into the Emmy-winning run over 11 seasons through the perspective of the cast and visionaries behind the scenes.

Joining Farrell and Alda on the doc is Gary Burghoff (Cpl. Walter “Radar” O’Reilly), and Loretta Swit (Maj. Margaret “Hot Lips” Houlihan) to name a few, as well as series executive producers Gene Reynolds and Burt Metcalfe. Those who have since passed, including show creator Larry Gelbart, Rogers, Larry Linville (Maj. Frank Burns), Harry Morgan (Col. Sherman T. Potter), and McLean Stevenson (Lt. Col. Henry Blake) are spotlighted through archival photos and footage.

Here Farrell opens up about his emotional reaction to the special. The 84-year-old also describes what it’s like to see the beloved sitcom still resonate more than 40 years after it ended.

Michael Farrell

How often do you go back and watch the episodes back?

Mike Farrell: The popularity of the show continues to astonish me and thrill me, frankly. I get constant emails, and mail, calls to keep it fresh in my mind, and its extraordinary impact. I don’t make a point of looking for it on television, but sometimes it’s there. And when it’s there, I can’t stop looking at it and watching those people I love so much and care about. To see and remember who they were and what we did together. It’s something that will stay with me for the rest of my life. I’m so thrilled to be a part of it that it’s hard to put into words.

I remember seeing Alan Alda share a photo of you two toasting to the 50th anniversary of the show’s premiere. How is it for you to still have these close connections after all these years?

For us, it’s a family situation. We enjoyed working together and having this kind of bond that continues to this day. We talk about how much we love each other and stay in touch regularly. It has been something that brings an ongoing extraordinary rush of gratitude and appreciation for all of us here…Then you see David Ogden Stiers, Harry Morgan, Larry Linville, and others on the special. There is that sense of longing for somebody who you knew, loved, and enjoyed working with. It’s piercing at the heart when you see that sometimes. For me, I’m overwhelmed with the warmth that comes back from seeing Harry, remembering the relationship we had not only during the show but afterward. Watching Alan and his incredible wit and hijinks. Some of those things stay with me today. When I tell stories, I can’t help but get misty about those memories. It’s an everlasting love affair for me.

It’s fun to think about what would have happened if social media had been around during M*A*S*H’s original run. For example, B.J.’s mustache would be a hot topic of conversation.

People often ask me, “What do you think of the mustache?” I will say my mother hated the mustache. The mustache was a fun thing. Alan called me at the beginning of one season and said, “They think we are too much alike. What do you think about growing a mustache?” I thought it was a great idea. We made a lot out of it, which was fun to do. I wore what started as a red long shirt. Through many washes, it came out pink. I thought it was hilarious to be wearing a pink shirt in the middle of all that. I get many comments from people in the gay community who tell me they loved my pink shirt and ask if that was a signal. I tell them no, but that I’m glad they noticed it.

One of the topics that gets tackled in the special is B.J.’s character and moment of infidelity with a nurse divorcee. After all this time, I even saw a Reddit thread asking if B.J. cheated on his wife Peg.

I remember when I first met with the guys and they were talking about the possibility of Wayne leaving. I told them the one thing I didn’t want to do as an actor was come in and step in the boots of “Trapper.” They understood. They had in mind a fellow who was married, not a womanizer like “Hawkeye” or “Trapper,” who had a child at home. And he is going to be true to his wife and family. You’re talking about modeling fidelity on television, I didn’t mind that at all. We laughed. It stayed that way. One year we did a show where Blythe Danner played the guest star. She and “Hawkeye had been having a love affair in medical school, and she was temporarily assigned to our station. She was married, but the affair popped up again.

There is a scene where “Hawkeye” asks B.J. if he has ever been unfaithful. I said never. He said, “You ever tempted?” I said, “Tempted is a different question.” He said, “So, you have been tempted?” I said, “No, it was a different question.” It was a good gag. Larry Gelbart, who wrote the scene was ont eh stage when we finished that shot. I said, “Larry, that was wonderful, but let me suggest the idea. The fact B.J. is a faithful husband is great by me, but to suggest a man was not tempted goes too far. I don’t think we need to paint in that pristine manner.” He said that was a good thought. A year later Gene remembers that conversation with Larry. He asked, “What do you feel about B.J. falling off the fidelity wagon?” I said, “It depends on how you resolve it.”

How do you feel it came out?

I loved the whole process that they cared enough to hear me out, and decided it was worth dealing with that question. I thought they resolved it in a classy way. B.J. was upset about what he had done. It was brief and a misstep. He was miserable about it. “Hawkeye” gave him hell because he was going to write home and tell Peg. He said, “Don’t do that to her. If you must confess for whatever the transgression, wait until you get home where you can be with her and talk to her. I thought it was great that they were willing to explore the kind of experience people are put through in these circumstances.

It was almost like it didn’t matter how far they went, but didn’t matter. He would feel the same way.

Exactly. But the idea of them spending the night together in a bed, under those circumstances, and didn’t go far sounds a little stretch to me.

When was the moment you felt how big a show M*A*S*H was?

I was in Southeast Asia during one of our breaks. After my second or third year there on the show when I went around, I was astonished at the no matter what part of the world, the show meant something to the.m. This one man said, “Your show constantly underscores for me the meaning of peace and the need for peace in this world.” I came back to set and Alan and I were sitting together during the first day of the season back. I said, “Are you hearing what I’m hearing out there?” He said, “Yeah, we need to be aware of the way the show is affecting people.

We decided on a regular meeting as a cast and talked through the issues of the day. Alan and I both made it a point that this show is having an impact that is beyond just being a popular television show. We need to be seriously committed to making sure we do the best work we can do. Everyone got it and agreed and rededicated ourselves to commit to doing meaningful work because of the audience’s respect and appreciation for the show.

What are your overall thoughts on the FOX special while screening it? 

I watched it with tears streaming down my face while laughter burst from my mouth. It was an extraordinary tribute. Not only to the show and people involved but the people involved behind the scenes. I’m glad they included the clip of Gene, Larry, and in particular Burt Metcalfe, the casting genius who brought many of the characters to the show; me included. He was a powerful force in maintaining the integrity of the show. It was deeply touching and I think the audience will love it. It shows the significance and the work of the characters and the way the show was built and what it became. I was thrilled when I saw it. 

How do you think the show would do in today’s TV landscape? 

I think it would remain a touchstone for people I can’t tell you how many veterans have contacted me. Even children of veterans. They would say. “My dad would never talk about his experience in the war until he saw your show. Then he would say, ‘That’s the way it was.”…That it has stayed relevant and meaningful to people for generations speaks volumes about the show. 

M*A*S*H: The Comedy That Changed Television premiere, January 1, 8/7c, FOX

@stroyent 🤝

[vintagetvstars]

Submissions and Bracket Update!

Hello everyone! It has officially been one week since launching this blog and opening submissions for our first hot vintage tv stars tournament, the hot vintage tv women's bracket! We are currently sitting at 118 total submissions! With at least 79 hot vintage TV ladies submitted. So far I've managed to sort through about half of them. Because we have a decent number of submissions I am currently planning on closing submissions on Friday, April 5th. This will give everyone a few more days to get in submissions before we start our tournament. Submission have slowly been winding down each day so it seemed like giving everyone a few more days to submit their favs and then getting to work setting up the bracket would be ideal. Though, if enough people feel like we should gather more submissions first and give everyone a little more time then I'm happy to push this proposed date back. But right now with almost 80+ submissions I think that's enough to give us a satisfying and fun bracket. After Submissions close I'll take some time to finish organizing everything before polls go up for round 1. There will probably be some housekeeping things after submissions close so stay tuned. As of right now I am shooting to start round 1 sometime between April 8th - 12th depending on how long I need to get things set up behind the scenes. So stay tuned for an announcement on the exact date! One housekeeping thing before the list of current hot vintage tv lady contestants. It seems there might have been a bit of confusion on how to fill out the submission form.

The place for the contestants name is where you put the name of the hot vintage tv lady you are submitting for the bracket.

And the suggested poll pic is for you to place a link to a picture of your hot vintage tv lady that I can use to represent them in the polls.

If you filled out the form incorrectly previously, no problem, please feel free to resubmit your fav with the form properly filled out this time. I can't use submissions that are submitted incorrectly, I simply don't have enough time to try and figure out what was intended from limited information. I've updated the form to clarify these things. Finally bellow is the current list of submitted hot vintage tv ladies for the bracket! Please keep in mind that this list is subject to change as I have only gone through about half of the submissions so far. It's possible there might be people on this list that will be disqualified later for not meeting our criteria.

If your fav isn't on the list, then they aren't in the bracket, so please feel free to submit them while submissions remain open!

Nichelle Nichols

Mary Tyler Moore

Bea Arthur

Diana Rigg

Gillian Anderson

Carol Burnett

Loretta Swit

Marlo Thomas

Lynda Carter

Betty White

Rue McClanahan

Barbara Feldon

Fran Drescher

Carolyn Jones

Claudia Black

Lisa Bonet / Lilakoi Moon

Sarah Michelle Gellar

Sarah Jessica Parker

Elizabeth Montgomery

Kathryn Leigh Scott

Julia Louis-Dreyfus

Miranda Richardson

Melissa Joan Hart

Mariska Hargitay

Lisa Robin Kelly

Elisabeth Sladen

Leighton Meester

Barbara Stanwyck

Kellye Nakahara

Shannen Doherty

Carol Cleveland

Aimi MacDonald

Catherine Bach

Valerie Harper

Jane Krakowski

Amanda Tapping

Penelope Keith

Kylie Minogue

Jonelle Allen

Rachel Bilson

Terry Farrell

Joanna Lumley

Siân Phillips

Karyn Parsons

Courteney Cox

Sherilyn Fenn

Eliza Dushku

Debbie Allen

Lucy Lawless

Jane Seymour

Jan Smithers

Carole André

Nana Visitor

Jackée Harry

Janet Hubert

Yvonne Craig

Peggy Lipton

Lisa Hartman

Julie Newmar

Anne Francis

Barbara Eden

Vivica A Fox

Grayson Hall

Joan Bennet

Julia Duffy

Mag Ruffman

Gina Torres

Mira Furlan

Tina Louise

Lara Parker

Eartha Kitt

Deidre Hall

Dawn French

Dawn Wells

Lalla Ward

Kat Graham

Joan Chen

Eva Gabor

Eve Arden

[openphrase123]

Sweet Memory by ARTHUR is an Inutile song to me. More because of the lyrics than anything else.

Anyways vibrating in anticipation for the next update. I have so many theories and I wanna know whats going onnnn

you're so right and i think it does fit because i'm listening to this and it's just like anxiety in audio form. that's mirabelle, babey!!!!!!

i've also heard it compared to happy accidents from saint motel which i ALSO agree with and it went into the playlist for "shit i listen to while writing inutile chapters"

MY songs for it are loretta from ginger root (both versions live in my head) and composure from poor man's poison.

two honorary mentions because they are not inutile vibes songs but i DO listen to them while writing inutile fairly often: honeybee from steam powered giraffe and most anything from the northern boys (give it to me is the most recent obsession)(do not listen to any of their stuff at work though you will get turbo fired)

[afterlifeoftheparty]

Helloe bestiee, im looking for country music that id actually like (cause ik theres some good shit out there) Do you have a playlist or some artists or smth you could share? thx either way xoxo

HELLO! :) i have no idea when you sent this i am so sorry!! yes i can share all my favorites with you <3

so this is my always updating country playlist, this is not a comprehensive playlist of country i like by any means but it is getting there!

as far as artists, this is also an absolutely not comprehensive list of both classic & modern country artists i like!

dolly parton

shania twain

reba mcentire

johnny cash

loretta lynn

orville peck

yola

home free

carrie underwood

zach bryan

faith hill

sugarland

darius rucker

mickey guyton

i can (and will if you ask!!) list so many more and dive into more of them, honestly i think the best place to start is just find the specific section of country you like and go from there! one artist or album or whatever and see what else you can find :) MWAH have so much fun

[blazewatergem]

Life update! Dad is doing a lot better, he ended up needing three stints in his heart but should be fine. Meanwhile, I’ve got my last exam this week - nevermind that we still have two weeks of lessons left :’D like, what the hell professor?

On to fun things, though! I’ve got my Genshin fics prepped to write - now if only they’d stop multiplying 😂

Here they are! I’ll break them down below, and explain a few things.

Game On!: This fanfic is going to be entirely based off of my own personal play though, my commentary, my ideas and opinions, so it’s SAGAU in a simple way. That being said, it is literally based off of my notes - so it’ll be slow to write/update as I am a slow player 😅 😂 it will also only include what I know, so it might not be lord accurate as I am currently in Liyue.

Eyeless Gaze Everwatching - Eyes On Me: These two are, technically, a series. They will have the same characters, as noted by the similar summaries, but the largest difference is the creature Loretta becomes when she is transported into Genshin Impact.

Strange Magic(Stranger Witches): Is a bit more crack-ish than the past three :’D My Problem Children Club accidentally gets teleported into Genshin Impact, a game which Roxie loves, and shenanigans start unfolding as they decide to…try and help. 😂 In their own, weird way.

Well, here they are! Hopefully the number stays at four 😂😂

[chachacancan]

Modern day Gotham AU is such a wild ride and I am here for it.

If you think about it like this weird culture we now have going on because of tiktok/bereal/twitter of taking pictures or videos of strangers and celebrities alike and posting it online just because would be such an interesting dynamic to explore in this fandom??

Because Bruce when he was a young batman and a young billionaire would only really have to worry about paparazzi and journalists.

But now every Gothamite and their mothers have tiktok and he and his kids gets recognized in the streets and there are update accounts that track their every move and people post shit like “spotted tim drake getting lunch @ Loretta’s diner” with a blurry ass shot of Tim from a hundred feet away.

And now people want selfies. They follow Bruce around for him to sign their Wayne Entreprises t-shirts. They snap short videos of him talking on the phone when he’s walking down the street with a caption that says “look who i just saw 🙀🙀🙀” and they they post it on twitter to the tune of 130k likes.

You just know that a PR person has sat Bruce down and reported that #dickgrayson was trending on tiktok, and Bruce, sleuthing as always, has definitely found a 200k liked thirst edit of his son in suits at various events, all jerky transitions over bass-boosted phonk and a filter that smooths out all the small imperfections Bruce knows Dick to have.

And the only one really sparer from all the circus is Jason, himself an avid tiktok user, because he’s technically a dead man, and nobody goes looking for him in the streets. People across social media have @ that go something like depressed.brucie.wayne and dickgraysonsleftcheek and Jason regularly screenshots the best of those and texts them to Dick.

[breathinglifeintomyoc]

Locklyle pt. 5

Fanfic of the Lockwood & Co. series by Jonathan Stroud. I haven't updated... in a year?? Sorryyyyy! In other news, I really love the Netflix version and like how it's revived the fandom (WC: 522)

This is just a snippet, you can read the whole thing on AO3!

It suffices to say, the job did not go smoothly. Kipps found the source after what felt like an eternity, but was probably not more than a minute from when Loretta Key reached her peak and Lucy had fallen to the ground screaming. From the salt-sprays and scorches that Lockwood could see through the secret doorway, Kipps had resorted to throwing salt bombs and the silver net on every surface of the small room. What the source was or how it was contained was the least of Lockwood’s concerns though. The visitor and her snake-like jaws vanished with a startling pop, and the extreme plummet in psychic pressure made Lockwood nearly double over with nausea. But the screaming continued. Lucy’s screaming continued. Fuck. He was next to her in an instant, but as soon as he touched her, her eyes shot open and the shattering sounds from her throat only intensified. Her skin was pale and blotchy and the hair she wasn’t gripping fell like torn curtains across her face; her eyes burned through him, seeing something he didn’t. “Lucy!” He tried to reach out for her again, but she stumbled away from him. “What’s wrong with her, I secured the source!” Kipps shouted from where he was helping George and Holly get up. I don’t know! Lucy was backed into the corner now clawing at her throat; she looked more like a visitor than she did even on their journeys to the Other Side. God it’s like the Annabel Ward case — she’s gone to deep. “Lockwood! What do we do?” It was Holly’s voice. The torment and fear on Lucy’s face was paralyzing him, dragging him down as if she was ghost-locking him. He saw a trickle of blood from Lucy’s nose. This is hurting her. It was obvious, but seeing the dark stain of her blood track across her sickly skin was enough to jar him to action. He bounded to her and wrapped his arms around her body as tight as he could, fighting her wild thrashing. God, her screams cut his very soul. The very small part of him not completely enveloped in panic noted that she probably wouldn’t be able to speak later. “Lucy! Lucy, please!” As she lost the strength to keep fighting against him, her screams grew more mournful and desperate. He was thankful that his arms kept her hands from continuing to scratch at her face. “Lucy! You’re safe! The visitor’s gone!” His ears were in significant pain by this point. “Lucy!”

“Loretta, stop!” It was George. And Lucy’s screams finally stopped. The silence that followed was deafening and, looking at his teammates, Lockwood was sure that they were just as hesitant to move a muscle and break the stillness that descended on the now disarrayed library. Lucy stumbled out of his arms and wavered in front of him.

“Lucy?” He probed quietly. 

She raised her face to look at him and the, pardon the pun, haunted sheen in her eyes was shattering. She took a staggering step towards him, but collapsed forward, making Lockwood rush forward to hold her for the second time.

[frostcorpsclub]

Frostverse Sountrack!

This post will get updated as I think of stuff <3 <3 <3 Some of these have full spotify playlists! Ask if you'd like the link.

The Family

-You're Dead by Norma Tanega

-Our House by Madness

-Our Word by Jessie Shelton

-Finale Ultimo (Don't Feed The Plants) from the Little Shop of Horrors Soundtrack

-Schadenfreude from Avenue Q

-----------------------------------------

Individuals

Suzy

-Dive Into The Madness by Dan Bull

-Sabbath Bloody Sabbath by The Cardigans

-Happy Meal II by The Cardigans

-Step On Me by The Cardigans

-Stuff Is Way by They Might Be Giants

-The Ballad Of Jane Doe by Emily Rohm

-Skinned by Blind Melon

-She's Not There by The Zombies

-Killer Queen by Queen

-Suburbia Overture/Greetings from Mary Bell Township!/Vampire Culture by Will Wood

-Halloweenie IV: Innards by Ashnikko

-Nuttin For Christmas by Art Mooney and Barry Gordon

-Suzy Snowflake by Rosemary Clooney

-I Want A Hippopotamus for Christmas by Gayla Peevey

-Frosty the Snowman by The Ronettes

-They're Coming To Take Me Away by Sloppy Jane

-Tonight You Belong To Me by Patience and Prudence

-Alive by Anthony Warlow

-Valley Girl by Frank Zappa and Moon Zappa

-Screw Loose by Ali Mauzey

-The Red Means I Love You by Madds Buckley

-The End Of The World by Skeeter Davis

-I Will Follow Him by Peggy March

-Stand By Your Man by Tammy Wynette

-I'm A Woman by Peggy Lee

-Batty Rap by Robin Williams

-Sweet Bod by Lemon Demon

-You Ain't Woman Enough by Loretta Lynn

-Lights On by Kyle Allen Music

-Livin' in the Sunlight, Lovin' in the Moonlight by Tiny Tim

-Cold Island by My Singing Monsters

-Thermodynamic Lawyer by Will Wood

Virginia

-Break Stuff by Limp Biskit

-Right Now by Korn

-Scars by Papa Roach

-Pity Party by Melanie Martinez

-Habits (Stay High) by Tove Lo

-Somewhere Only We Know by Keane

-Dark Red by Steve Lacy

-Creep by Radiohead

-Tears In Heaven by Eric Clapton

-Girls by MARINA

James

- My Ordinary Life by The Living Tombstone

-Biggering by The 88

-Dead To Me by Kali Uchis

-Take A Slice by Glass Animals

-Apex Predator by Barrett Wilbert Weed

-World Burn by Taylor Louderman

-Killer Instinct from Bring It On: The Musical

-ROXANNE by Arizona Zervas

-Competition by Azealia Banks

-Applause by Lady Gaga

-Coin-Operated Boy by The Dresden Dolls

-Don't Mess With Me by temposhark

-Everybody Loves Me by OneRepublic

-King Herod's Song by Mike D'Abo

-Feast or Famine by Starkid Productions

-Let's Have A Battle by The Dazzlings

-Under Our Spell by The Dazzlings

-When You're Evil by Aurelio Voltaire

-The Ugly Truth by Nick Jonas

-Venus Fly Trap by MARINA

-Call Me Cruella by Florence + The Machine

-Land of the Dead by Aurelio Voltaire

-Toxic Love by Tim Curry

-The Hills by The Weeknd

-The King of Villains by Aurelio Voltaire

-The Main Character by Will Wood

-Killing Spree by Matt Smith

-Not A Common Man by Matt Smith

-Ultraluminary by Phillipa Soo

-I Know Him by Johnathan Groff

-Ambrosia Wine by Madds Buckley

-Fabulous by Phineas

-Be Prepared by Jeremy Irons

-Fabulous by Sharpay Evans

-Watch Me Work by Brianna Mazzola

-Paint The Town Red by Doja Cat

-Primadonna by MARINA

Janet

-Money, Money, Money by ABBA

- Jump In the Line by Harry Belafonte

-Dance The Night by Dua Lipa -Blame It On The Boogie by The Jackson 5

-Move Your Feet by Junior Senior

-Super Freak by Rick James

-Girls Just Want To Have Fun by Cyndi Lauper

-I Wanna Dance with Somebody by Whitney Houston

-Primadonna by MARINA

-Fancy by Reba McEntire

-I Squeezed Out A Baby, Yet I Have No Idea Who The Father Is by Masuna

January

- I'm A Princess by Bill Wurtz

Julian

-1985 by Bo Burnham

Justin

-Girls by The Beastie Boys

-Monsta Mack by Sir Mix-A-Lot

-Lips of an Angel by Hinder

Kimberly

-Twisted by The Original Starkid Cast of Twisted

-No Good Deed by Idina Menzel

-Gethsemane by Andrew Lloyd Webber

Drusilla

- Northern Downpour by Panic! at the Disco

-Nine in the Afternoon by Panic! at the Disco

-----------------------------------------

Character Relationships

Jack and Suzy

-Chapel Of Love by The Dixie Cups

-Today I Met The Boy I'm Gonna Marry by Darlene Love

-Be My Baby by The Ronettes

-I'm Into Something Good by Herman's Hermits

-Hopelessly Devoted To You by Olivia Newton-John

-Uptown Girl by Billy Joel

-Screw Loose by Alli Mauzey

-Me And My Husband by Mitski

-Pavlov by Kate Douglas

-The Horror Of Our Love by Ludo

-Running On A Treadmill by Oingo Boingo

-Accidentally In Love by Counting Crows

-An Unhealthy Obsession by The Blake Robinson Synthetic Orchestra

-Under My Thumb by The Rolling Stones

-Stalkers Tango by Autoheart

-I Will Possess Your Heart by Death Cab for Cutie

-Poisoning Pigeons in the Park by Tom Lehrer

-Obsessed With You by The Orion Experience

-I Hold Your Hand In Mine by Tom Lehrer

-I Only Want To Be With You by Dusty Springfield

Santa and Virginia

- Everlong by The Foo Fighters

- Cirice by Ghost

- Electric Love by BORNS

-Do I Wanna Know? by The Arctic Monkeys

- Love The One You're With by Crosby, Stills & Nash

-Lucky by Collbie Calliat

-Animals by Nickelback

Jack and Santa

-Eddie Baby by Felix Hagan and The Family

-Lay All Your Love On Me by ABBA

-I WANNA BE YOUR SLAVE by Maneskin

-Wrecking Ball by Mother Mother

-Curses by The Crane Wives

-Angel Of Small Death And The Codene Scene by Hozier

-Arsonist's Lullabye by Hozier

-Just The Two Of Us by Bill Withers

-Like Real People Do by Hozier

-Iris by The Goo Goo Dolls

James and Rudy

-Cooler Than Me by Mike Posner

-The Masochism Tango by Tom Lehrer

-Smooth by Santana and Rob Thomas

Justin and Mercy

- Love Grows by Edison Lighthouse

- Once Shattered, Now Whole by Brian D'Arcy

- Glimpse Of Us by Joji

- I Think I Love You by The Partridge Family

- There She Goes by The La's

-Talia by Chaz Duffy

Jasmine and Jeremy

-Nothing Left To Lose by Jeremy Jordan

-Crossing The Line by Mandy Moore

-Good For You by Rachael Bay Jones

-Nothing Good by Lea Salonga

-Fish In A Birdcage by Fish In A Birdcage

---------------------------------------

[riley1cannon]

A couple of years ago I was reading this contemporary romance novel set it Alaska (title and author escape and I'm feeling too lazy to look it up, but there was this grumpy diner dude ala Luke Danes, and the heroine kept having mishaps that ruined her Alaska vacation, and there was a controversy over a big resort development) and it was okay, not great, but any potential it had was utterly flattened when this moose, initially presented as comic relief that would be ongoing through the book -- the moose gets into trouble and has to be relocated, and the diner dude who was best buds with the moose takes this hard, and this particular reader was also none too pleased. I skimmed through the rest of the book to the predictable ending, and decided against reading anything else by the author.

So, okay, that's one romance novel ruined due to unnecessary animal drama. What are the odds it would ever happen again? Slim to none, I would have said. But then here comes Mr. Impossible by Loretta Chase, and it already had some problems but then ... Then the hero and heroine are in danger, alerted to the danger by a brave little donkey named Hermione, and they set about saving themselves and proceeding to undoubtedly vanquish the villain(s) and achieve their HEA -- But what happened to the donkey!?! Huh? I skimmed and skimmed and could find no update on poor little Hermione! And I trusted you, Ms. Chase, because just a few chapters earlier I had been concerned about Marigold the Mongoose, but you saved her. Why no kindness for Hermione?

This book wasn't going to get five stars from me anyway (too much instalust, too much trying so hard to capture the fun of Evie Carnahan and Rick O'Connell and not coming close, too much me comparing it to Amelia Peabody when it shouldn't even be mentioned in the same breath really), but then this poor little donkey is abandoned and left to her cruel fate, and it promptly went on the DNF pile.

(Fair question: If I had otherwise been enjoying the book, would I have dumped it just because of the donkey? No, probably not. This is similar to cozy mysteries, for instance, when the only compliment I can pay is that I really liked the dog or cat.)

So, anyway, that was a dud. One of the few this year, knock wood.

P.S. If someone out there has read this book and can tell me that, in fact, Hermione does turn up later alive and well, that would be appreciated. Won't make me want to pick it up again and finish it, but it would be good to know.