#like hes so superior for ignoring his friends getting hurt | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

anonymous-existences · 3 months ago

Text

Chapter 1 : One Sided Family

Big TW:(thanks for reminding me;-;) sensetive stuff such as graphic SH and CSH. THIS FIC is absolutely WHUMP based, I apparently hurt a lot of spots— either way, Neglect, Angst, Danny suffering, neglect.

(yes, this is the fic title <33)

Danyal Al Ghul, A child that shouldn't have existed, a child capable of sunny sweet smiles and empathy despite the harsh environment of the league. No one understood how he could still smile and make subtle small jokes, a warm presence that he gave off was eerie for the league. It made Talia much more favorable of her other son, the much superior Damian Al Ghul.

Danyal himself didn't understand how he could be himself, whenever he greets someone they ignore him, he tries to open up to his own brother hoping for some closure between them but that only left him with a deep scar in his cheek, he had to tend to his own wounds from fighting with his brother, his existence felt like a mere stepping stool for Damian Al Ghul, Also known for being the Real Heir of the Al Ghuls. Danny slowly felt disappointment in himself, blaming himself for being the way he is.

Was Danyal wrong? Was Danyal a mistake? Danyal asked himself gently placing his small palm on the mirror, a slap of the Mother he is bound to with flesh and blood visible in his cheek, his small hands pressing on his reflection, 'Why am I.. wrong?' Danyal mentally asked himself trying to hold back to tears who wanted to break through his calm act, his chest heavy with questions yearning for the warmth he was not even familiar with.

Danyal saw a new guard for them, he resembled someone... Danyal couldn't pinpoint who, He always greeted the guard despite them not greeting or saying anything back, but Danny felt as though they were watching him, softly. Danyal smiled at the guard every so often despite being told by his superior twin that there is no use in taking notice of the guard. Danyal always snuck books to the guard and often puts it in his hands or Danyal would sit beside him and read slowly.

The guard used to only stare at the books but now he's started reading them which made Danyal's heart leap in joy as he had finally found an interest of the nameless guard. At some point Danyal had approached the guard and slowly got used to sitting on the Nameless Guard's Lap, Danyal no longer felt lonely in the league. Getting attached to his new found friend despite Damian's disappointment in his attachment atleast his twin is now learning more stuff from observing the guard.

It was occasional that Danny get a scrape or two from the harsh training and the guard would come by the boy the kneel, staring at the scrapes as if it would go away with just sight trying to 'intimidate' the wound to stare it away, unable to process on how to properly 'repair' or heal the injury. It made Danyal laugh as it portrays that the guard has a sense of care for the boy but just didn't know how to act on it, knowing nothing as to how he'd be able to help Danyal.

As time went on Danyal has grown fascinated with the stars, His newfound friend has noticed sure, often nodding along with Danyal's Chattering about what he's learned and what books the boy has read, Danyal wishes that this silent friend of his would stay with him for he is the only one who's ever listened to the boy. "Can I know your name?" Danyal blurted out to the guard, "Oh wait sorry Right— you can't speak—" Danny was interrupted by the guard's deep Voice.

"Jason." He said, Danny perked up and his eyes sparkled and he nodded with a wide bright smile, it made the guard flinch and just nod back, now it was just another day for Danyal hoping to read more books with the guard but upon entering his chambers... He was not there.

Danyal felt his heart crack at the sight of his friend not being present. Where is he? Danyal looked around silently in the league searching for his friend desperately but he never found the Man, Danyal held back his tears as to not show any emotion. He thought maybe the guard was a test from Grandfather to tell Danyal that he could take what Danyal loves the most if he continued to be... Weak.

Slowly he built up walls around his heart, his soul, secluding himself and becoming lone, Although he still trained even under harsh conditions he continued fighting through, not because he had a purpose but because it's the only thing he thinks he's useful for, he could never surpass his superior twin but the best he could surpass would be his own self. But deep inside him his heart aches at the loneliness he felt, he felt alone and gradually his mind was filled with thoughts of usefulness and what is... What is he?

What was wrong with him? Not even grandfather liked him, rather grandfather nor mother looked at him, Neither did his twin. 'Maybe I really just wasn't supposed to be born...' he whispered under his breathe holding back tears as he stared at his reflection in the mirror. He pulled up his sleeves and unsheathed his blade, "Maybe.... Maybe the pain will make me forget...?" Danyal asked himself staring at the mirror, moments after he hissed in pain feeling his blood trail down from his wrists.

He couldn't hold back his tears as he continued to let the blood drip, he stared at his tear streaked face, "Yeah... The pain does make me forget.." Danyal smiled in the mirror slowly getting himself used to the mask, Putting on a poker face is better than... Him. Danyal washed his hands and pulled down his sleeves, hiding the wounds just like always as no one would really care nor notice a few sliced in his wrists. No one will ever love him back in this place, his devotion and love will never be.... Acknowledged either way.

Another day passed, and another, and another, normal days until assassins who had been, practically with the league for a long long time who still held their loyalty to the former leader whom Ra's had executed didn't stand by. In an act of revenge, the remaining assassins had tainted the food of the two heirs to the Demon Head with poison and immediately committed death to themselves afterwards.

Danyal laid on the cold floor, his body slightly pulsing slowly losing consciousness in their private chamber, Danyal looked over to his twin and reached to hold the boy's hand, he felt his consciousness fade slowly as the pain began to began it's work. Thinking death will finally take it's toll on Danyal, he wishes upon a star, a myth of the children, tell no one and it will come true, Slowly he fluttered his eyes close and wished upon his last gasp of Breathe he wished that in If ever there is a next life, someone to love him with all his heart the way he loves back.

...

......

.......

He blinked, he opened his eyes, he had been reborn, his body now regressed back to that of a baby. He was born in the family of the 'Fentons' , parents that are scientists(?) he wasn't quite sure as to what the Fenton's really are. Although they weren't always present he could feel that they loved him, loved him as their son ofcourse. They spent their time tinkering away and chattering about their latest project. It did not bother D̶a̶n̶y̶a̶l̶Daniel as they took their time to teach Danny the basics of 'Tinkering' away.

Jasmine Fenton, Jazz as she preferred was different than his past experience, instead of leaving him behind and going on her merry way and watch their parents 'raise' him she stayed, rather she acted just like a mother, despite being the more favored sibling among their parent's favor, despite her being just allowed to leave the boy to fend off for himself, she stayed.

She read many books, thick and thin, so many infact it surpassed her already tall frame, all books surrounding the topic of parenting and how to take care of a child that is Daniel, It confused Daniel, all this love and attention they are giving is new to him, like a radiant glimmer of hope that shines brighter than the sun itself. It was warm and Comforting, a new sensation he didn't want to let go. He clutched onto his Sister..? Mother. Like a chickling to it's mother hen.

Whenever he was in distress she was there to console him, comfort him that he did nothing wrong, whenever something didn't go his way she'd teach him how to understand how not everything turns out the way he wants. She taught him many things, Jack and Maddie did too but Jazz taught him nearly everything. She was there, she filled the roles of Mother and Father despite her having the talents to run away and become successful, her intellect leaving her with many open doors she could take yet she looked behind and stayed... For him.

He fumbled and sometimes felt shy with all the love he is receiving, along with his new two best friends Samantha Ingrid "Sam" Manson and Tucker Foley and some mutuals, they too were with him through thick and thin despite... Despite that accident that left him scarred. They cared for him and loved him even tho they knew, they all knew he changed. That he died but they stayed and helped him through the memories and the pain, slowly gaining more friends in the school despite his difference.

Even getting a suitor that is Dash Baxter, although Jazz was very protective of Danny at first for The Boy was a Former Bully and A Jock that jazz didn't trust he didn't give up on trying to court Danny that it made Danny laugh, Jazz finally let the boy Court Danny after so long of fighting jazz for the 'right to love' as Sam would call the whole ordeal. They stuck through everything, the mess and the new appearances.

Even when Ellie appeared! Although she was a surprise to him he accepted her wholeheartedly seeing her as his little sister, although it started rough because of some complications with Vlad... they got through it and slowly going somewhere together. Then he saw himself, a future version of himself from another timeline where he had lost it all, He knew everything, every secret he kept hidden and locked away. Dan knew every thought he made, every action and every strategy. Both eventually clicking with each other and Dan realizing he still had that soft spot in his 'core'.

The bond between them becoming brothers just as well, it was perfect, D̶a̶n̶i̶e̶l̶Danny had people who loved him back, the way he loved them with all his being. The way he gave away his heart to them. If only Maddie and Jack never found out what he became after the accident, maybe he could've stayed. He felt so much pain being strapped to the table and opened up like some... Animal. The last moments he's seen being his Older Sister, Jazz screaming out his name in the Lab before his eyes fluttered close due to exhaustion and pain.

...

.....

........

Why was he back? The walls of the league surrounding him, His breathe Hitched and his eyes frantically looking around slowly processing that he was.. back. Back in the league, he felt his walls instantly guard his 'core' his heart. "What?" He blurted out as he breathes in and out trying to compose his beating heart. 'Why? Why? Was it all a dream? Please. It wasn't a dream right?!' he asked himself under hushed whispers and clenched his chest, he saw the scar he retained from the accident still in his hand, he traced it on his body and the Lichtenberg Scar was still trailing along his palm to his chest to his eye.

D̶a̶n̶y̶a̶l̶ couldn't understand, how does he remember the years he was Danny? Perhaps a past life? That couldn't be as he gained back the scars from that 'past life' , it all felt like a haze in the mind, a barrier of fog into memories he couldn't access. He knew to himself it wasn't dream. It couldn't be at all! There was no way! The only proof he had to say to himself that it had been real was a neon green sticky note that appeared Infront of him in the mirror.

"Time Will Tell.'

-CW

Danny grit his teeth, he felt the last of his tears flow out, a silent scream escaping his mouth as he for the first time in what felt like years, let the blood trickle down his palm from his wrist, from that day froward he didn't care no longer. He thickened the walls around his heart and do what he was told. 3 days after his awakening Damian himself finally woke up, but remained indifferent as always.

"Danyal?" Damian took notice of Danny for the first time. Damian noticed that the Boy... Stopped smiling at Damian, Damian didn't understand at first but he just thought to himself that maybe it's just that Danny has finally realized his softness will not get him anywhere in the league. Danny stared at Damian for the most part and never responded to his twin's questions, always lost in thought in those eyes devoid of any emotions, eyes that used to shine at the sight of stars now dull and... Dark.

Ra's was pleased by Danyal's new self, for this dull knife was finally sharpening itself to be a deadly dagger, Talia remained as indifferent as always but Damian had a slight hint of concern he shut out. Danyal remained indifferent, setting himself to be the loyal tool he was expected to be keeping his hands in his back and his head moderately high but not higher than his superior twin's. He was the tool they always expected him to be now, Damian's supposed stepping stool to success and greatness as the next Demon Head Heir.

'Right, this is how it was always supposed to be...' Danny whispered to himself, Damian hearing only faintly and glancing at Danny who didn't look back, Danny didn't look 'scared' or 'nervous' Infront of Ra's or anyone anymore as he shouldn't be, he acted like a doll with no emotion, complete contrast of what he used to be. He thinks it's for the betterment of himself to completely lock his emotions in the empty space in his head.

For his 'Mother' is no longer there to receive his love.

....

When they turned 10 years old Talia sent them off to their Father in Gotham in an effort to disrupt their work which didn't really succeed.

Richard "Dick" Grayson immediately took a liking to Damian seeing Jason in the young boy and someone who needed 'care' and guidance. Danyal... Danny was just following them as they cemented their immediate likeness to Damian after they had thought Bruce Died. Dick immediately decided that he would put his all into guiding the young Damian.

But what about Danyal?

Danyal tilted his head as he paused in the doorway of the Manor, "Oh my... Hello there Young Master..." Alfred Pennyworth, the Butler of Wayne Manor greeted Danyal and lowered his knee to Danyal's height, "Oh.... Hello..." Danyal merely greeted meekly as he looked up at the older Man, "Come on in.. May I know your name?" Alfred asked holding out his hand to the poor boy. "Danyal... But... Please call me Danny.." Danny, smiled.

Alfred Nodded and lead Danny in the Manor, "Do you want to eat anything young Master Danny?" Alfred looked down at the new ward and Danny stared at Alfred for a moment, "do you know.. how to make.. Burgers or Pierogi?" Danny tilts his head, "why Ofcourse Master Danny, how about beverages?" Alfred asked softly, "Just some... Soda is fine." Danny gave him a small smile as Alfred held the boy's hand and lead him to the kitchen to wait and eat.

Danny knew they weren't exactly food that Danny should be familiar with in the league, Danny asked for them either way to remember the taste of Illinois in his tounge. To remember When Jazz would cook him pierogi or when him and his friends and 'suitor' would eat at Nasty Burger with their food, he merely wanted to remember the 'past life' that he so loved.

Alfred served him his food with a smile, a pierogi and a burger with soda, Danny brightened up and smiled at Alfred, "Thank You Sir Pennyworth..." Danny muttered shyly and Alfred chuckled amused, "Please just call me Alfred, Master Danny." Alfred slightly ruffled the boy's hair gently and Danny nodded so.

After some time Danny yawned whilst telling Alfred stories of Amity Park, Alfred just listening intently despite the confusion on how Danny would know this, or the fact that Amity Park didn't exist... Alfred listened to the small boy's chatter until he grew exhausted and fell asleep leaning on Alfred's arm. Alfred's eyes softened gently carresing the boy's cheek and grazing over his visible Lichtenberg scar that tainted his innocent small face.

Alfred gently carried the boy and heading over to an empty bedroom that was promptly kept clean by Alfred everyday, Alfred tucked the boy in and looked over his shoulder, "Alfred... That's the other one right?" Dick asks, "Yes Master Dick, This is.. Danyal, but he prefers the Name Danny." Alfred just bows slightly at Dick who nodded.

"I see... Jason and Damian are at the living room, do you also want to meet Damian now too?" Dick asks and Alfred nodded following Dick out of the room, Alfred carefully and quietly shut the bedroom door letting Danny sleep peacefully. Danny's Scars spread, revealing more of it's leakage to Danyal from Daniel, Danny felt his dreams manifest.

Days, Passed, maybe even weeks, Danny lost count on how long it has been since he's talked to one of his 'brothers' or Damian as it seemed they're always busy, Damian was also building connections with them and Danny being once again left behind to himself... 'maybe I could help Tim with Father?' Danny asked himself slowly perking up knowing he can ask Clockwork for a Favor. Although it may change some things in the timeline because of his favored interference. Maybe they'd finally acknowledge him.

Danny snuck inside the Batcave with ease using his Phantom Abilities, He wrote on a small sticky note that he found by Tim's usual Desk and drew a summoning circle to ask CW. Danny looked up at a clock "Clockwork... Can you do them a small favor?" Danny asked the clock softly and it ticked loudly by the minute and Danny knew that meant a 'Yes'. Danny smiled softly and put stuck the note in the computer where Tim would easily see.

Danny was organizing the files after seeing the mess and even putting other sticky notes to help Tim, Danny's heart fluttered at thinking of how he could help Tim through small clues, all notes he put had the initials "D.W." on them with a smile. Eventually he even got a Coffee Ready Thermos by the Desk for Tim before leaving the Batcave with a happy smile and a light heart.

"Clockwork should I tell Alfred?" Danny asked the grandfather clock and it ticked by the minute initiating another yes, Danny hopped happily and heading to find Alfred but promptly stopping in his tracks. Danny stared at Jason and Damian 'hanging out' in the backyard. "The Guard..." Danny muttered under his breathe, he leaned on the Window from upstairs as he watched them play.

"Maybe... I'm not meant to be loved her—" the Clock ticked loudly as if aggresively saying that it was not the case. Danny just stared at the clock and sat by the window. "I miss my mom..." Danny mutters softly his voice betraying him and breaking. "Damian?" Dick places his hand on Danny's shoulder, "O-Oh! It's you... Your name is Danny right?" Dick asked with a worried face wiping the tears in Danny's face.

"Am I... Not wanted here..?" Danny asked straightforwardly tears sliding down his cheeks, Dick froze, "W-why would you say that Buddy?" Dick's face contorts into more worry and disbelief. "This is... The first time I've been here that any of you talked to me..." Danny sobbed out, unable to hold back his heavy emotions any longer, Dick just embraced the small boy in his arms. "It's not that you're not wanted... That's not it, I'm sorry." Dick softly whispered as Danny continued crying.

"I'm sorry we made you feel that way..." Dick just comforted the boy, He didn't notice that his 'favoritism' towards Damian was affecting the other boy, they always thought of him as the unmoving wallflower that didn't seem or look that he cared at all about it, they always thought Damian was the one who needed more care since he seemed more expressive and aggresive.

Dick took Danny outside hoping he could know more about the kid, although Danny only stayed quiet as they watched Damian and Jason play, Damian dragging Dick to play as well, Danny being.. left behind again.. atleast he's gotten used to being left alone that it stopped hurting too much. Danny stood up and left without the three noticing his presence disappearing.

"A promise is just a slurry of words that can always be broken..." Danny muttered softly under mostly broken breathes as he headed back to his assigned bedroom. Tommorow dawned on Danny as the presence of Clockwork dropped the temperature of the home, Danny felt himself shivering slightly and breathe puffing out frost as he was in the halls.

He had forgotten that 'Danyal' and 'Daniel' are different bodies and that he himself is not used to this sudden coldness that felt like Winter inside a frozen cave. "Danyal!" Danny heard Damian call out his name and a jacket being wrapped around him, "Wear this." Damian clicked his tounge as he helped his younger brother cover up and wrapped his smaller frame with a large and thick blanket.

"I've been looking everywhere for you." Damian sighed and hugged Danny tightly, "Huh? What do you need Damian?" Danny just asked and Damian grabbed the boy by the wrist gently and dragged him to the Batcave, "I think that green creature is looking for you." Damian says breathing out a puff of frost as he does so, Ice trailing along the walls the longer the temperature stayed low.

Damian dragged Danny to the Batcave, Damian trying to resist the cold but Danyal getting concerned and Wrapping Damian in the blanket he has given him, "I already have a jacket Akhi." Danny sighed and forced Damian like a burrito before being the one to drag him to the Batcave instead.

As they arrived at the Batcave they saw Tim on his knees on the floor staring up at the large green portal atop the summoning circle adorned by stop watches and candles, other heroes such as The speedsters and some Danny doesn't recognize also present. The higher being wore blue ghastly robes holding a staff. It was hard to properly see the being with it's full glory due to the brightness of the Lazarus Green portal.

"This Interference will cause some.. major and minor changes in the future... Do you want to proceed?" The being asked, but it didn't seem to ask Tim. Tim looked over his shoulder and saw Danny and Damian, Danny nodded. "Very well little Badger~" the higher being laughed amused at how this world is proceeding instead of it's original course.

[Clockwork Favors his Grandchild too much to not do the bidding of changing a Realm's timeline course.]

The higher being that is Clockwork slowly approached Tim who instinctively covered Danny and Damian with his body, his action made Clockwork smile enthusiastically, "atleast you have the mind to care for both boys... Hmm... Yes yes I'll help you..." Clockwork motions his hand dismissively slowly turning his body to face the other leaguers and John Constantine. "Oh my. I came early didn't it Hellblazer?" Clockwork tilts his head smiling and approaching John.

John felt the weight of the room become heavier than before, the pressure from the god of time's presence weighing them all down, John lowered his head as a bow and the other leaguers followed his motion knowing well if they even offend the god they'll have no other choice now and Bruce will surely not come back. Clockwork taps his chin with his finger a smile still plastered in his face. "The children shouldn't be awake for any of these." Clockwork said and before anyone could respond, he turns his head to Damian and Danny's direction and flicked his finger.

Their eyes shut close, sudden exhaustion overwhelming both their bodies.

.....

......

Danny opened his eyes suddenly and sat up near immediately, gasping for air and frantically looking around, he found Damian slowly waking up beside him, Danny could hear his heart racing in his ears as he slowly took in slow deep breaths. "What time..." He muttered trying to track the clock hanging by the wall and soon his eyes landed on the clock reading the time at exactly 8:00 AM. It was already day and the sun was shining through the gap of the curtains.

"Ugh...." Damian groaned beside him, slowly sitting up and rubbing his eyes tiredly. "Danyal...?" Damian muttered his gaze landing on his brother beside him. "Hello.. morning..." was all Danny could mutter slowly catching up on his breathe. He fixed his eyes on the door suddenly as it opened, Dick entered the room to check on them and he froze upon seeing them finally awake.

"Oh my Fucking god— YOU'RE AWAKE!" Dick had tears in the edge of his eyes as he pulled both boys into a bear hug, dick trying his best not to cry of worry, "Unhand me Grayson! It is far too early for this!" Damian complained and tried to push Dick away but soon gave up, Danny just slowly softened and buried himself in the hug, loving the physical attention. "You've been both asleep for almost a week, Jesus Christ..." Dick just curses under his breathe, hugging them both tighter.

"You saved Bruce..." Danny perked up at his statement but soon realized he was looking at Damian, Danny was confused and Dick suddenly pulled Damian up and hugged the boy only. "C'mon Dami! You have to see Bruce! You saved him after all with that tip!" Dick dragged Damian, "I did not do anything GRAYSON!" Damian sneered and cried out looking back at Danny who's eyes were slowly losing it's light once more.

"Dan—" Damian was cut off by Dick suddenly tossing the boy in his arms and carrying him in his shoulder, "C'mon now Dami! Don't be shy about helping!" Dick exclaimed. Danny heard their footsteps slowly running far from the room.

Danny's breathe Hitched as he tried to hold back his tears, slowly lowering his head and his gaze landing on his hands. He buried his face in his hands as broken sobs soon broke through his defenses. "But... I'm the one who helped Tim..." He muttered under sniffled and muffled sobs. He slowly pulled on his head as he kept his head lowered on the blankets, slowly curling up on the bed kneeling still. "I was right.... No one... Loves me here..." Danny... Danyal cried out softly. His heart growing heavy the longer he cried.

Danyal laughed as he pulled on his hair and dragged his hand down his cheeks, leaving small red marks as he dug his fingers on his neck and slowly wrapping his arms around his shoulders letting himself fall back in bed, knowing he's been left and forgotten once again. He buried himself under the blanket and cried softly, muffling his sobs with the thickness of the blanket.

"I helped..." He says, feeling childish for being jealous and feeling that it was unfair that Damian is the One getting credit. He Felt childish, Undeserving. "Right... He's the superior Twin... It's inevitable." He scoffs, 'reminding' himself that he's not the loved twin for a reason, trying to tell himself that he's not worthy of their love because he's not someone even worthy of being Damian's Brother, not worthy of being an 'Al Ghul'. Let alone being worthy of being a 'Wayne'.

He just slowly closed his eyes letting tears flow out, "I miss my mom..." He softly mutters.

"I miss my family..."

Tags for the OP of this prompt and someone else lol:

@unadulteratedsoulsweets (OP)[I tried my best to recreate this OP]

And

@yoopsity <33

Masterlist

#danny fenton #danny phantom #danny phantom fandom #dc x dp #dcu #dp x dc #dc x dp crossover #dcxdp #dp x dc crossover #danny phantom fanfiction #danny phantom fanart #danny phantom art #angst

436 notes · View notes

lovifie · 11 months ago

Text

Hormones

When you suddenly find yourself thirsting over your LT!Simon that on any normal day you have to restrain yourself from throwing a chair at.

Enemies to lovers | Fluff | smut | 895 words Next Part

It's been a couple of months since you started working with the Task Force 141, an awesome force of men that save the world while the world sleeps.

The same way Soap and Gaz are, you are a sergeant. Not yet included in the task force officially, but still being asked to tag along to some missions.

It's been great! The sergeant's quickly become like childhood friends, the captain took you under his wing like one more of the team, Laswell is euphoric there is another woman and the lieutenant… Well, he's there.

It's not that you would expect him to give you special treatment, THE Ghost from Task Force 141. You are not a nosy person, but c’mon, it's Ghost! Who hasn't heard of him?

In the military world, it was the closest to meeting a celebrity. You were not expecting him to fall head over heels for you, but you were still a bit taken back when the first thing he said to you was:

“The fuck you looking at? Want a pat on the back for making it here without shitting yourself in the process? Get the fuck out of my face, go bother somebody else.”

You were not expecting a kiss on the forehead, but shit, a “Good morning” would have been enough.

Still, as time went on, the interactions between the LT and you remained just as bad. At the end, you stopped trying to talk to him, and just asked the sergeants or the Captain.

Except that bothered him too, like a stubborn toddler.

“Now you are too great to speak to your immediate superior? Need to go cry to the Captain like a brat? Make sure not to wet your nappies, soldier.”

And honestly, what's his fucking problem?

As a sergeant, you are proud to admit you have a wide range of skills and abilities, one of them being your patience to not absolutely destroy all the idiots that you have come across in your life. But honestly, you can feel it run thin as time goes by.

Even the captain had to jump to your rescue on more than one occasion, when Simon attack was completely uncalled for or he got a bit too hurtful.

But unlike your lieutenant, you remain professional. Listening to your captain, getting along with your sargeants and completely ignoring your lieutenant.

Until today.

The summer weather, great when sunbathing, not great when the AC is broken and you get stuffed in a room without windows for a debriefing with the team.

It's Ghost's turn to talk, standing to his full heights, when he finally takes off his jacket. And your eyes follow the movement, and then they just… stay there.

The tablet he is using looks like a smartphone on his hand, digits so thick you wonder how he manages to get them on the weapons triggers. The tendons of his hands moved under the skin as he adjusts his hold of the electronic.

And you follow the line, taking in the tattoo sleeve on his left arm, trying to decipher what they are supposed to be, some damaged with scars, others seems so old the ink got blurry, but still you can tell the way his muscles move under them.

Such a big arm, you know he could lift you with ease. Shit, he could lift everyone in the room. His biceps must be the size of your head, and he seems so unbothered by it, like it is not incredible the way he is built.

He switched his weight from one leg to the other, and your eyes traveled to his hips and waist. A waist that looks small, not that it is, there is nothing small about this man, but the sheer size of his shoulders in contrast makes his waist look small. His shoulders and his back, wide enough that it makes you wonder how he can enter through the door at base. He must enter sideways, there is no other way.

His hips called you again, making your eyes travel down your body, until they set between his legs. The bulge in there makes you feel offended, of course the idiot would be packing even when soft. How dare he?

Would he be a grower or a shower? Cause if he is a grower and this is the soft stage, you wonder how he doesn't get tangled.

You wouldn't mind getting tangled, you think, biting your lip.

Wait.

WAIT.

WHY ARE YOU THIRSTING FOR HIM?!

You look at the front, standing straight, and come face to face with Soap; who is perfectly aware of hour hatred towards hour LT is now looking at you like you just grew a second head on your shoulder. For a moment you don't know who looks more confused with your actions.

A silly thought goes through your head, and you pull your phone out, opening your period track app. And as you guessed, you were right. You show your screen to Soap and as he read: “Prediction: Ovulation. High risk of getting pregnant.” He burst out laughing making you chuckle as well as you shake your head.

Maybe, if you wouldn't have been so engrossed in your imagination, you could have noticed the way Ghost was stuttering while speaking, in ecstasy he finally managed to get a reaction out of you.

#call of duty #ghostsoap #cod x reader #cod #cod smut #task force 141 #call of duty x reader #cod modern warfare #ghost #simon ghost riley #ghost x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #ghost cod #simon riley #ghost smut #john soap mactavish #call of duty modern warfare #cod mwii #lovi writes 🩷

2K notes · View notes

jadeylovesmarvelxo · 10 months ago

Text

Eddie always notices the cheerleaders, he never notices you, so in an attempt to move on you go to Steve's party and one thing leads to another with him.

Perhaps it's the knock on the head Eddie needs to realise how he really feels?

Mdni, 18+, Fluff and angst, unrequited feelings or are they? Jealousy.

Eddie Munson X Reader.

Brief Steve Harrington x Reader.

💌🫶

Eddie was always flirting with the cheerleaders, it didn't matter if they never flirted back, or they only flirted back to piss off their boyfriends, obviously they were Eddie's type despite his intense hate of the dark side.

You watched Eddie moon over the impossibly pretty girls and sag. He would never notice you, you were just his friend, one of the members of Hellfire.

"Why do you flirt with them all the time Eddie, aren't they part of the dark side of whatever?", you ask him and the rest of Hellfire quieten, it wasn't often that someone challenged Eddie, if at all.

"Sweetheart, I like to extend my superior flirting techniques to all the ladies" he answers back with a teasing smile. All the ladies except you of course.

"Dude, you have no technique, unless technique counts at you making a total goofball ass of yourself" Gareth points out but quietens at Eddie's glare.

"Princess is a girl and you don't flirt with her" Mike adds and Eddie rolls his eyes at him.

"Because she's like one of the guys Wheeler" you still as you process Eddie's comment. One of the guys, that's all he saw you as.

"But I'm not Eddie, just say the truth that you don't feel like that for me and be done with it" you don't mean to be so snappy but Eddie's comment has hurt you.

"I just said that" he says impatiently and it sends a knife to your heart. It's the confirmation you need that he's never going to see you in the same way you see him.

...

Thursday is party night at Steve's, it's the first he's held in a while and what started as just a small intimate gathering has snowballed into tons of students finding their way to his.

He notices you at exactly the same time you notice him, you're new to the party scene. It was a spur of the moment to come here, fuelled by Eddie's comment and the need to move on.

Or to just get completely drunk and forget your heartbreak for a night.

"Hey, haven't seen you at many parties" he hands you another beer and you shrug.

"Just wanted a change, shouldn't you be mingling with the guests?" He makes a face and sits beside you, clinks his beer with yours.

"Yeah, I wasn't expecting this many people. It's not really for me anymore" you look at Steve, really look at him and realise how much he has changed from the Steve you've known for years.

The crowd cheers at someone using the beer keg, the guy is upside down and laughs with his friends as he finishes. The noise is beginning to give you a headache, Steve notices your expression and gestures to the door.

"You wanna get out of here?" He suggests and you nod. Absolutely.

...

For a while you and Steve talk, ignore the noise downstairs and you find yourself relaxing in his company.

"So Munson huh?" he asks gently and you wonder how he knows. Maybe it's the way your face lights up just at the mention of Eddie. Body flushing in embarrassment you nod and sigh.

"He doesn't even notice me" Steve scowls and gently places his hand on your shoulder, squeezes it tenderly.

"Unrequited love. I know all about that. Munson's an idiot" you peer up at Steve and his gaze lingers on your lips, desire floods through you and before you know it you and Steve are kissing.

Hesitant you break away, Steve gently strokes your cheek. "Do you want to do this? It doesn't have to be anything more than two friends seeking comfort honey?" you let that sink in for a few seconds then make your decision.

You lean forward and kiss Steve again.

As the party rages on you and Steve lose yourself in one another.

...

Bright sunshine wakes you in the morning and you groan, Steve is soundly asleep beside you and all the memories flood back.

Fuck. You slept with Steve. Steve groans as you rush out of bed and his hand gently tugs at your arm. "Hey, slow down honey" he mumbles sleepily.

Flustered you sit back down and he takes your hand, "You okay? Was last night okay?" you nod feeling a little bit shy.

"It was nice, really nice" he squeezes your hand and kisses your cheek and even though you're smiling there's a mix of emotions inside you.

You always thought your first time would be with Eddie, it was silly but that's what you thought. You know this was a one time thing but it would be nice if you got to know Steve more, he was a really great guy, nicer than you ever thought.

"I can drive you to school if you want? I need to pick up Robin anyway" you agree to this and quickly get dressed, following Steve out the door.

🫶💌

Movies sure did exaggerate first times. It was lovely but you didn't feel any different or look any different. As normal you head into school and make your way to your locker.

Whispers follow you, you begin to feel paranoid that it's about you and Steve, but the party was really busy last night so who would have seen you and Steve together?

Listening closely to the mutterings around you, you cringe when you hear your name and Steve's. Well shit. The cat was out of the bag.

You slept with Steve and somehow that fact has made it around Hawkins High gossip chain quicker than you could blink. Steve was out of high school so he didn't tell anyone, except maybe Robin but she hardly participated in school gossip. So someone must have seen you going up Steve's room at the party.

Fuck. You avoid the gazes of the rest of your classmates and just about make it to lunchtime to the safety of the Hellfire table. Rarely did any of them pay attention to any gossip, so you assumed you were safe here.

You were so very wrong. From the way that Jeff was staring at you, it was obvious he had heard what happened. Could anything just stay a secret without it making rounds? The perks of living in a small town, you grumble. Everyone knew everyone's business.

Determined you hold your head up high, you don't have anything to be ashamed of. If someone tried to do that then they were an asshole, you weren't going to pay any attention to them.

Eddie barely notices any of the stares heading the way of the Hellfire table, he's off on one of his rants and hyped up.

He winds up Jason as per the usual but Jason only smirks and his gaze rests on you. Bingo on who saw you going up to Steve's room then. You're tempted to flip him the bird but refrain from doing so. It was better to ignore the idiot.

"Hey Munson, I didn't think any of you Hellfire freaks had it in you but she's showing you all up" he points to you and you glare at him. Asshole.

Confused Eddie turns to you and Jason continues his tirade. "So how was it huh? Screwing king Steve?"

There's immediate silence in the cafeteria and you feel embarrassment flood through your body at the attention and the fact that Jason has said it publicly.

"Better than the poor girl who has to ride your tiny limp dick Carver" you reply sweetly and watch as his face goes red with rage.

"Could hear you from the other room couldn't we Chrissy? Oh Steve" he exaggerates moaning and crude gestures. Eddie has gone strangely quiet and he catches your eye.

"You slept with Harrington?" his face is blank and you don't know what to say, his reaction is strange and before you can reply the bell rings, leaving the conversation unfinished.

💌💞

You're faced with comments and giggles all through the rest of class, you put on a brave face but Eddie notices you discreetly wipe your face with the back of your hand at your locker.

All Eddie feels is rage. Steve must have let Carver know all the details of your night with him. There are other emotions churning in his body but he can't look at them too closely because they will change everything.

So he focuses on the rage and decides to go and see Steve.

...

Steve didn't expect a visit from Eddie Munson, he's stacking shelves with Robin and help from Dustin who's practically mooning over his new friend.

Then the guy walks in, his brown eyes flashing with anger and makes a beeline straight for Steve who can barely react when Eddie's fist hits his face.

The videos scatter and Dustin exclaims in shock as Robin rushes to help him. Steve clutches his nose and glares at Munson. "Dude, what the fuck?"

"Cut the shit Harrington. Did you tell Carver all about your night with yn? Spread all the details so people would hound her all fucking day?" Steve gapes and realises that Eddie has gotten the wrong idea.

"What? no way dude. That night was between us" he watches Eddie's anger deflate slightly. Grudgingly he helps Steve up but is still glaring daggers at him, gingerly Steve massages his nose and winces.

"Jeez Munson, that was a mean hit. Are you jealous or something?" Eddie's eyes widen and he scoffs.

"Jealous? I'm not jealous" Robin scrutinises Eddie and nods as does Dustin. He was totally jealous, even if he didn't want to admit it.

"Well you're acting like it dude, she's not your girlfriend so why do you care who she sleeps with" Eddie seems lost for words and opens and closes his mouth several times.

"Dude, did you just realise now after you told her that she wasn't your type" Dustin rolls his eyes at him and Eddie looks sheepish. Robin gapes at him and whacks him on the shoulder.

"Oh my god, you're an even bigger dingus than Steve" she exclaims, Eddie winces and rubs his shoulder.

"I know I'm an idiot. I fucked up, I realised once I heard about you and her and that I've been hiding how I feel for months. So yeah you're right Buckley, I'm a dingus"

Dustin looks between Eddie and Steve, catches Robin's eyes and rolls his eyes. "So why don't you just get on with it and tell her?" He asks exasperated.

Eddie bites his lip, he knows he has to tell you but what if he's too late? He voices his concerns and Robin smiles. "You never know until you say something"

He nods still nervous but determined, and he also still has the urge to kick Steve but he puts that down to the jealousy still pulsing in his veins. He had to do this, had to be Eddie the Brave and win his princess.

...

Eddie's at your door with wildflowers he plucked from the forest, he hands them to you and you smile, feeling better already.

"What a shit day" you sag and he pulls you into a hug, you're exhausted with the wave of emotions that has been plauging you all day. Then you remember Steve's call and peer at Eddie.

"Steve told me you hit him" Eddie's cheeks turn pink and he ducks his head to avoid your gaze.

"I thought Steve managed to spread around about your night together and I kinda lost it, you were so upset and it pissed me off... I was totally jealous as well" he says this in a quieter tone and you're sure you've misheard him.

"You were jealous of me and Steve?" he nods and you're puzzled by this because he said he didn't see you that way. Noticing your confusion Eddie gives you one of his sweet dimpled smiles.

"Yeah, I'm a dumbass or a dingus as Robin said" you snort feeling exasperated. After all this heartache it turns out that he does have feelings for you after all.

"You couldn't have figured this out earlier?" his cheeks warm at your response.

"I know, I have now and I'm hoping I'm not extremely late and that maybe you feel the same way sweetheart?" you tug him to you, hooking your fingers through the waistband of his jeans and kissing him then breaking away secretly thrilled when he looks dazed.

He captures your lips with his again and you can't help but smile.

"You're a dingus Eddie Munson" he gives you the sweetest, goofiest grin and tugs you close to him.

'I know Princess, but I'm your dingus"

💞🫶

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson angst #eddie munson #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson x best friend reader

751 notes · View notes

sp-ud · 2 months ago

Text

And while I'm on my Mouthwashing analysis arc, I had some realizations about how I think Daisuke's character plays into the message Mouthwashing is trying to tell about the cycle of rape culture, inaction, and how workplace environments are a key part of why the cycle is in place.

So my realization started with me complaining about how people often go "If Daisuke had known what happened to Anya he would have-" because we don't truly know what he would have done. Then I realized, actually maybe that's the point of Daisuke in Mouthwashing.

What I mean by that is he's the youngest of the crew, not only that but he literally has no other real job experience. He's incredibly new to all of this, he doesn't know the culture and is looking at those around him, his superiors, for direction and guidance. He's a young adult who still has starry eyes and is trying his best to live up to the expectations everyone around him has even though he feels personally directionless and unsure where he wants to go in life.

Things I think a lot of Mouthwashing's audience can relate to those aspects of Daisuke, or at least significant parts of him. And I think that is the key to understanding Daisuke's purpose in a story like Mouthwashing, to be someone likeable that the audience can see themselves reflected in.

Bringing this back to how I think this plays into the message of Mouthwashing. I think the fact that we ultimately don't know what Daisuke would do if he learned that Jimmy raped Anya is important.

Because we can't 100% say that he would do anything. Because his actions within the story honestly indicate it could go either way in my opinion. Specifically what he does when Anya has locked herself in the medical room.

On one hand, we have the fact that despite him having a better relationship with Swansea and being unsure if drugging him is okay or not, he still goes with it as it's what Jimmy, the current acting captain, is saying to do. He questions it but he doesn't protest or take a different action. He deferred to the highest authority in the situation, even though he wasn't sure if it was the right thing to do, even though it involved tricking his mentor who he clearly looks up to more than he does Jimmy.

But on the other hand, we also see him directly going against what Swansea told him about not going near that vent because he could get hurt, for Anya's sake. Willing to ignore what he was instructed to do just to have a chance at saving Anya. And even after he was hurt he still kept going, he still pulled himself up and unlocked the door.

So, if Anya had told him, what would he have done? Would he have risked his own standing and possibly even his safety with the higher authority figures for her sake? For doing what's right? Or would he be scared? Perhaps see the others inaction and follow their example even if he felt it wasn't the right thing to do?

What would you have done? What will you do if a co-worker/friend confides in you that someone else you know, perhaps even a higher up, sexually assaulted them?

And that's why even though what prompted me thinking about Daisuke's role was me being annoyed at people who focus on "What Daisuke would have done if knew?", I now see it differently. As people reflecting what they hope they'd do if in a similar situation on to Daisuke, and I think that's the point of his character in Mouthwashing and why we aren't given an indication of a clear answer.

To have us acknowledge that no, in reality, it can be hard to do what's right. That sometimes we will play into these toxic and harmful cultures even if we know it's wrong. And sometimes we might do it without even realizing it.

But that doesn't make anyone a bad person. Because we do want to do what's right, we don't want to be compliant in this cycle anymore. And acknowledging that it will be hard isn't saying that we shouldn't even try, it's just acknowledging that it'll be hard.

Daisuke represents the hope that things can improve while not ignoring the uncertainty many people have if it's even possible for things to get better.

#mouthwashing #daisuke mouthwashing #swansea mouthwashing #curly mouthwashing #jimmy mouthwashing #anya mouthwashing #spud originals

265 notes · View notes

sainteclectic · 2 months ago

Text

the juno incident wasn't petty spite

there's this misconception in the fandom that heart shot mind out of impulsive and petty rage. that his reasoning was just heart being "too emotional." and it makes sense with how it's described in ruler of everything! but the story we hear in RoE is from mind's perspective.

Juno was mad, he knew he'd been had So he shot at the sun with a gun Shot at the sun with a gun Oh, he shot at his wily one only friend

that sounds like heart being unreasonable, right? him being volatile and ready to act violently out of spite?

but mind is the one controlling the narrative in this story. ignoring the fact these are unchanged lyrics, let's analyze this for a second: mind describes heart's motive as simply being "mad." this downplays heart's motivations and simplifies them into a single, trivial emotion. he was "just mad" (with no underlying issues or valid reasoning).

but this is how mind sees it. this song is all about how mind sees heart. the changed part makes this clear:

Well, listen to this He shot and he missed And so Juno got what he deserved Imprisonment was all that he earned So let's stop on in and see if he learned a goddamn thing

here, mind is actually being the petty one. "got what he deserved," "see if he's learned a goddamn thing." mind is using emotionally charged language. this isn't just impartial justice. he's putting on a front of justice and superiority to conceal his true reasoning for punishing heart.

he's mad. he got shot at, and he wants vengeance.

it's not like this is the first time mind has put on a front of logic to seem like the rational one. his entire song is him saying he's just acting logically while taking petty shots at heart instead of making a real point. it's entirely within his character to downplay heart's feelings to make his own spite seem superior.

meanwhile, let's see how heart describes his motivation in light:

Humility's a virtue; pride, a sin Or so it has been said But every time I've hurt you - or at least tried to You've laughed and smiled instead Kicked, scorned, and damned by the forces that be Not ever once did you fall to your knees

this doesn't sound like heart is acting out of a single emotional outburst. he talks about how mind doesn't see his concerns or arguments as important. mind's response to heart lashing out is to laugh. he's treating heart like a petulant child instead of an adult with real feelings. he hates how mind acts unaffected by their problems, how he never seems to get any punishment for his pride.

heart has a valid point here.

mind wouldn't listen to him. mind doesn't see him as worth listening to. what else is he supposed to do? if mind won't be get off his high horse by words alone, the only thing left is physical violence. shooting mind wasn't an act of irrational emotion. he saw it as his only option to knock mind down a peg.

seeing the juno incident as irrational is exactly what mind wants! he wants to paint himself as the rational one and heart as a volatile threat that's too emotional to do his job! but if you actually listen to heart, you find that he has entirely valid reasons to escalate things.

tl;dr - you fell for the character's facade that's meant to be deconstructed by the viewer!!

#cccc #chonny jash #chonnys charming chaos compendium #cj heart #cj mind #meta #i guess?#tridential tirade

174 notes · View notes

erimeows · 5 months ago

Text

TFA Characters' Toxic Traits

Me with another TFA headcanon set? Who would've guessed. Got the inspiration for this one after realizing I'd done it with MysMes but not with Transformers. Enjoy!

Optimus Prime: Shoulders every single burden all by himself. Will not ask for help and open up to others when needed, even though not doing so ends up negatively impacting everyone more in the end than asking for help would've.

Bumblebee: Toxic positivity- enough said. You vent to him and he's like "oh but you have so much to be happy about!".

Bulkhead: Will not take sides in any conflict of his own accord even if he knows that one side is "right" if he fears it will upset any of his friends. Passively steps out of conflicts even when he's needed, unless it's an absolute emergency.

Ratchet: Refuses to open up about trauma that he has even though it affects the way he acts and negatively impacts the people around him, who are very confused as to why he acts the way he does.

Prowl: Has an ungodly superiority complex, tends to think he's better or smarter than others (even when he's not), though he's trying to work on that.

Sentinel Prime: I think we saw in the show, but he's very prideful and will never admit that he's wrong in any situation. Also terrible at offering genuine apologies- more of a sarcastic "I'm sorry you feel that way" than a genuine "I'm sorry I did (x)" kind of guy.

Jazz: Gets uncomfortable when things get too serious to the point that if people try to open up to him about something deep, he will change the subject or deflect them 90% of the time.

Ultra Magnus: Too by the book. Will do things that he doesn't believe in or ignore wrong doings for the sake of legality.

Megatron: Very selfish and very charming, which is a bad combo. Similar to Starscream, he will be nice to your face if needed and then screw you over in the end as long as it benefits him.

Starscream: So many, but the worst one is lying to people's face and then talking shit behind their backs or doing them wrong for his own benefit.

Blitzwing: Depends on which of the three personalities you're dealing with because they all have some pretty over the top toxic traits, but the worst and most prevalent one is that all three of them tend to belittle others to feel better about themselves- especially if their life is going bad or if they're feeling insecure about something in particular.

Lugnut: The Megatron obsession, obviously. It gets to the point that anyone and anything else in his life that should be prioritized get(s) pushed to the side for Megatron's sake when Megatron doesn't value him nearly as much.

Blackarachnia: Very vengeful and obsessive about getting revenge to the point that it's unhealthy. Obviously this is seen in her TFA episodes where she wants revenge on Optimus/Sentinel for what happened when they were in school- but those emotions are over a huge tragedy that happened in her life and are almost understandable. This toxic trait also applies to, say, someone who accidentally shoulder checked her or took her lunch from the staff fridge. If you wrong her in the slightest, she will make sure she has revenge, even if it was a genuine mistake.

Lockdown: Can't handle commitment. He's not scared of it, just not emotionally mature enough. Whether it be a job, a friendship, a romantic relationship, or whatever else, he won't commit. He doesn't care whose feelings it hurts or if he's passing up on something genuinely good for himself either.

Swindle: Also can't handle commitment, but I'd argue that his worst toxic trait is actually his concern for money. He's terrified of being broke to the point that it consumes his every waking minute. Sure, he enjoys the swindling, but if he misses out on money he panics and he will go to ridiculous lengths to get a good deal or to rip someone off.

147 notes · View notes

libraryofolive · 7 months ago

Text

lost time

featuring: Nanami Kento x fem!reader

genre: Angst, hurt/comfort, gets fluffy towards the end

word count: 6.6k

synopsis: Nanami Kento left sorcery - and you, his best friend - behind two years ago. So what happens when you, still pissed off at him, get assigned a mission together?

Like this? You can find my smaus here and my drabbles and other fiics here!

Do you also have a request? You can find my rules for requesting here!

"No. I'm not working with him. I refuse." You seethed at Yaga, blatantly ignoring the man stood next to you in his beige suit and blue shirt, his reflective glasses blocking his eyes from your view - not that you would grace him with eye contact in the first place.

"You don't get a choice. The two of you were specifically chosen for this mission. I know you have some... history... but the fact is, you were a good team. The two of you worked well together. You need to do the same now."

"Absolutely not. I will do it alone if I have to."

"Not possible. It's too dangerous for one sorc-"

"Then make Gojo do it." You snapped. You looked Kento Nanami, who had been eerily silent through both Yaga's briefing and the argument that followed it, up and down, a frown etched into your face.

"Gojo is currently overseas. You two are to exorcise these curses together. End of discussion." At Yaga's words, you stormed out of his office. Deep down, you knew that you were being childish, throwing a tantrum that reeked of immaturity and unprofessionalism. You were considering leaning into your rage filled, angsty teenage state of mind and punching a wall when Nanami emerged from the office.

"I'm not talking to you." You spat at him, voice laced with venom.

"That's fine. But I expect you to be at least professional whilst we share this mission." He folded his arms across his chest, one eyebrow raised at you.

"Fuck off." The audacity of this man, acting superior to you when you were the more experienced sorcerer in this situation, considering he had been off playing corporate scumbag the past two years.

"I thought you weren't talking to me."

You raised your middle finger at him, turning around and walking away. Who the fuck did he think he is? Who gave him the right to act like that towards you?

This mission was going to be hell.

When you first started your education at Jujutsu Tech, Kento Nanami... intimidated you. Being a third of your first year class, he seemed the brooding type, the only emotion you ever really saw on his face being irritation. He was the opposite of your other classmate, Haibara, who was all sunshine and smiles. Where you and Haibara got on well enough, you opted more to avoid Nanami like the plague, at least, initially.

As the three of you started to fight curses together, you learnt to trust your classmates. You knew that they would always have your back in the dangerous scrapes you were often plunged into, even if you were unsure if you could really call them your friends. You felt like an outsider when the three of you were together - Haibara and Nanami's friendship blossomed quickly, but you felt like your connection to the boys was lagging behind.

"Boys are idiots, I would know." Shoko had once said between puffs of her cigarette when you asked for her advice about the situation. Due to the small number of girls attending Jujutsu High the two of you had bonded over the shared trauma of always being outnumbered, and you felt the closest to her out of all of your fellow students. "I wouldn't worry about it," she continued, "I was the same with Gojo and Geto. You'll click eventually."

"That doesn't fill me with much confidence." You frowned, "I'm not sure that it'll ever happen. I mean, I trust them with my life-"

"You have to do that-"

"and I respect them heaps. They're talented sorcerers, and they're both so brave. I don't think I've seen either of them break a sweat on our missions. But apart from sorcery, I don't know if we have anything in common."

"You worry too much." Shoko poked your nose condescendingly, smiling to show she was kidding around. Still, your brow furrowed, another protest on the tip of your tongue. "Seriously. You've only actually known them a short while. Give it some time. Not everyone becomes friends straight away."

"I guess you're right.." You sighed, conceding.

"I always am. It'd be a good idea to learn that." Your friend winked at you, making you roll your eyes at her antics.

But, she was right, eventually. Haibara had - unbeknownst to you - overheard your conversation, and resolved to try harder to befriend you properly.

"C'mon, Nanami, she seemed sad!" He exclaimed as he told your other classmate about what he had overheard.

"I'm not like you, Haibara. I'm not great at this making friends stuff."

"Well, you made me your friend. What's one more?"

"You are the reason we're friends. Your unrelenting pleasantness eventually wore me down."

"Oh please. You're funny, smart, and a great sorcerer. That's friendship material right there."

"If you say so."

"I'm not saying you have to be her best friend in the whole universe. Let's just try and include her a bit more, okay? Actually respond to her when she asks you a question rather than just grunting in her general direction." Nanami grunted in response to Haibara, making him laugh.

"See? Funny!"

The car ride to the abandoned hospital where the two first grade curses you were to exorcise were hidden was so tense, Ijichi thought he could cut that tension with a knife. He gulped, pulling at his collar, the sound filling the eerie silence of the car.

"So, er, it's been a while since you two saw each other, hasn't it? Isn't it nice to know the other is well." He said, attempting to fill a void made of awkward silence and angry looks.

"So nice." You replied sarcastically, rolling your eyes. You knew that you would have to apologise to Ijichi after this trip - it wasn't fair for him to get caught in the crossfire that was your tattered friendship with the man sitting next to you. Nanami knew this too, and felt it necessary to scold you.

"Your problem is with me, not him. Please don't project your hatred of me onto an innocent bystander." Still refusing to talk to him, you simply flicked his face.

"How mature."

You leant over to flick him again, but Ijichi spoke once again. "What lovely weather we're having!" In an attempt to stop a brawl breaking out in the back of his car, Ijichi had said the first thing that had come to his mind, paying no mind to the actual weather, which was pouring down with rain.

"Yes, quite pleasant." Nanami hummed in agreement, but sceptically eyeing the outside world from the pleasant heat of the car.

"Oh shut up." Your eyes narrowed at him, words icy cold.

"Are we talking again now?" He raised a brow at you, that smug expression from outside of Yaga's office back on his disgustingly handsome face.

Your ensuing flick to his cheek caused his expression of smugness to turn into one of irritation.

After your conversation with Shoko, you had noticed a shift in your dynamic with your classmates. Haibara had started asking you more questions directly, purposefully bringing you into the conversations between him and Nanami. He also sought to spend time with you out of class, one on one, and soon a real friendship clicked into place just like Shoko said it would. I guess she was right, you thought, not that I'd ever admit that.

Soon, group movie nights became a tradition. You would sneak into their section of the dorms every Friday, the three of you taking turns to choose what film would be that night's entertainment. You had begun to appreciate the stupid action/comedy films Haibara favoured, whilst you forced the two to watch childhood classics they had never seen.

"I am not watching another Barbie film." Nanami used to sulk.

"Well, it's my turn to choose, and this is what I have chosen."

"Yeah, Nanami, the rules of movie night dictate that we have to watch whatever the person in charge of picking chooses. That means if someone choses a Barbie film, we have to watch it."

"We have watched five already. Please, choose a different film." He aimed the last half of his words at you.

"Nah, I don't think I will. And I know you secretly enjoyed the last one."

"I did not!"

"You most certainly did! I saw you smile at the happy ending!" Haibara joined in your teasing of the blonde.

"I was only smiling because it was over."

"Excuses, excuses." You dismissed his rebuttal, grinning as you pressed play on the film.

Your relationships with the two developed quickly as these group hang outs became more and more frequent. However, there was always more distance between you and Nanami than you and Haibara. Until one week, when Haibara fell ill, messaging you to let you know:

Too ill for movie night :( What? Noooooo! Reschedule? Don't be silly. You and Nanami have one without me!

You paused at his suggestion. Sure, you and Nanami had hung out outside of class together. But never just the two of you, and always instigated by Haibara. Would it be awkward? You were just watching a movie, you reasoned, so it would be acceptable to just sit next to each other in silence. Outside of your better judgement, you found yourself once again sneaking into the boys' dorms.

"What are you doing here?" Nanami questioned when he saw you.

"Movie night, duh. What are we watching? It's your turn to choose."

"But Haibara isn't well."

"He told me to just do it without him... unless you don't want to? I can just head back to my-"

"NO! Er, no, it's fine. We'll watch something. I haven't thought about what to watch, so let me go raid my DVDs." He blushed at his slight outburst, and the thought of spending time, alone, with you. It was hard enough to not embarrass himself in front of you when Haibara was around to distract you, but alone? Sat right next to you?

"Okay, cool. I brought popcorn." You grinned at him, holding up the bright bag of the sweet food.

"Oh, thanks..." He trailed off, staring intently at the bag you held in your hands.

"The movie, Nanami?" You asked.

"Oh, yeah. One sec." He wandered into his room, silently cursing himself from being such an idiot. He emerged with two DVDs in hand.

"These are the only two decent ones I've got. What do you think?" He handed them to you, letting you look over the synopsis of each one. They were artsy ones, and you were pretty sure one of them was French.

"Are these yours?" You asked curiously, looking them up and down.

"Well, yeah. Why else would I have them?" He replied as he tried to plug his DVD player into the TV.

"They're just so... different from what you usually pick."

"Oh, I just pick those stupid action ones because I know Haibara likes them, and you like to make fun of him for liking them. It keeps you both happy, even if I don't find them particularly pleasing."

"Jeez, Nanami, you're making me feel bad for forcing you to sit through all of my Barbie films."

"Those aren't... atrocious. I have unfortunately found myself singing some of the songs as I go about my day."

"I knew you secretly enjoyed them! No one can resist the allure of Bibble."

"Never say that sentence ever again. And don't repeat what I said, either. Now have you chosen which film you would prefer?"

"It's your turn to choose, Nanami. Put whichever one you prefer on." You hand him the two DVD cases before making yourself comfortable on the couch of the communal dorm area, wrapping yourself in the blanket you had brought from your own dormitory.

"Or whichever one you can comment on the least."

"Oh please, you enjoy my running commentary on the movies we watch."

"In your dreams." He slotted one of the DVDs in the player, pressed play and joined you on the couch, sitting as far away from you as he possibly could.

"God, Nanami, I don't bite. You can sit a bit closer to me." He shuffled along a little bit, and you decided to make yourself even more comfortable by putting your feet onto his lap.

"What do you think you're doing?" He asked, cocking his eyebrow - an expression that never seemed to leave his face around you.

"Getting comfy." You grinned at him before turning your attention to the TV, missing the pink tinge to his cheeks.

"We should split up." Nanami's baritone voice rang out through the halls of the abandoned hospital. It wasn't silent - the rain falling through the large hole in the ceilings and roof prevented noiselessness.

"I'm happy to do that if it means I can get on with this away from you."

"That is what 'split up' means."

"Who do you think you are, Fred from Scooby-Doo?" You glared at him. The downpour you had gotten caught in had flattened his styled hair into a look that somewhat resembled his signature cut back in high school. He still looked stupidly good, you thought, but you had always found him attractive.

"Can you stop with the theatrics? I don't want to be here just as much as you."

"I'll take the higher floors. You stay here." You stormed off, something you always seem to be doing around him nowadays. Nanami sighed. He didn't know what he expected when he returned to sorcery and saw you again, but it certainly wasn't this much hostility. Had you harboured this towards him the entire time he wasn't around?

"Be careful." He called after you, still wishing you safety despite how little you currently cared for him. Your only acknowledgement of his words was another middle finger hurled at him from over your shoulder. He sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose in annoyance. Between you and the two first grade spirits running around this place, it was going to be a long day.

After that movie night, you found yourself actually considering Nanami Kento your friend. Once Haibara recovered from his cold, he was slightly confused about the new closeness between his two friends, but he was as happy as you were that the three of you had bonded. He was also confused as to why you kept on bringing up a 'Bibble' around your shared friend, but he laughed along with you every time you did.

Eventually, there came a time where the two of you were practically joined at the hip. Nanami was thrilled with your newfound friendship, knowing that without Haibara’s pushing - and an illness that Nanami was convinced wasn’t as bad as Hairbara had told you both it was - he knew he would have never had the nerve to speak to you, nevermind be your friend. But part of him knew that he would never be satisfied being just your friend. You were the first thing he thought about when he woke up, and the last thing before he slept. He found himself being reminded of you in everything he did - the stars were the twinkle in your eye when you were talking about one of your passions. The sun’s rays were the warmth of your smile, something that could bring light into even the darkest of days.

Nanami found himself sat across from you at a restaurant. To onlookers, it would probably look like a date, two young people sharing each other’s company for a pleasant evening. Haibara, who usually accompanied the two of you on outings like this, had been sent to exorcise a curse in a different city and wouldn’t be back until the next day. As much as Nanami missed his friend, he was glad to have some alone time with you, even if it wasn’t the romantic date he wished it was.

“Okay, I need to know,” you said between mouthfuls of your food, “why the hell does Gojo call you Nanamin?”

“To wind me up, no doubt. He knows how much I hate it.”

“You hate it? But it’s so cute! I think it fits you nicely.” He raised an eyebrow at you, as if to ask if you were being serious. It made you giggle.

“I’m just playing. But I do like it. Maybe I’ll start using it.”

“Please don’t.” Nanami cringed at the thought of you and Gojo sharing the same nickname for him.

“You’re no fun.” You pouted slightly, and God did he want to kiss your pout away. His face warmed at the thought, before mentally scolding himself for thinking inappropriately. “So what can I call you?” You continued.

“Kento. Please, just call me Kento.”

“Your first name? Wow, we must really be friends,” you grinned at him, “Kento.” Yeah, Kento thought, he could get used to you calling him by his first name.

Haibara was an observant person, and he easily picked up on the slight shift your friendship with Nanami was making every day. The shyness that sometimes made itself apparent, the red tinges to your cheeks every time you stood a little too close together. Your teasing towards Nanami dialled up a notch, and he was often found stumbling over his words in an attempt to respond. Gone was the reserved, nonchalant persona that intimidated you when you first met him, and it was slowly being replaced by a crushing schoolboy.

Not that you noticed, or were faring any better. Shoko was frequently on the receiving end of your lovesick rambles.

"And when he raises the one eyebrow at me? All cocky and teasing after I say something stupid, God, Shoko, I just want to melt."

"Can we go back to you ranting about how you couldn't make friends with him? Somehow I think I prefer that." She nudged you with her elbow, grinning.

"Oh shut up! You have to hear about my love life because you don't have one to tell me about."

"Well fuck you too!" The both of you laughed, these joking barbs a key factor of your friendship. "I am happy for you. For finally managing to force them into being your friend and for liking one of them enough to actually have a crush on them."

"You're happy that I have an all-consuming crush on a guy that definitely doesn't like me back? Some friend you are."

"It keeps my life interesting, what can I say?" She pulled a packet of cigarettes out of her pocket, taking one out and putting it to her lips. "But he definitely likes you back." She said as she fished around in her pockets for a lighter.

"You're just saying that to make me feel better." You replied as you took a lighter out of your own pocket and lit her cigarette for her.

"Since when do you carry a lighter?"

"Since you can never find yours."

"I knew we were friends for a reason." She puffed on her cigarette, leaning onto to stair behind her on the outdoor staircase you were currently sat on. "Seriously though. I've seen you guys interact. He's into you. You should ask him out."

"Maybe."

"You're pathetic. It's never gonna happen if you don't do anything about it." She blew her cigarette smoke into your face, making you cough slightly.

"I thought the guy was supposed to do the asking."

"Have you met the guys? They're all too much of a wimp to do any asking. It's up to us girls, as always."

Nanami had found one of the cursed spirits on the first floor of the abandoned building, and exorcised it without much effort. This, however, didn't put him at ease. If that curse was easy to defeat, yet this mission was dangerous enough to warrant sending the both of you on it, what did the other curse have in store? Or had the higher ups just over-estimated how dangerous the curse was? Sure, the one he had exorcised looked even more menacing than your average curse, but there was not much substance to back up those looks.

He paused, trying to pull a logical plan together. Should he go and find you? Now that one curse had been exorcised, there should only be one left in the building, so it could be beneficial for the two of you to reconvene and tackle it together, although finding it could take much longer. There was also the fact that you were so adamant in being stubborn and not talking to him, unless it was to chew him out for whatever reason you thought appropriate. If you refused to work with him, then it would make more sense for you two to stay apart and cover more ground. He hated that he couldn't read you as well as he used to, and that he couldn't fully rely on your trust anymore. Although, did he really deserve your trust? Your unwavering belief in your abilities as a team, something you had even before your friendship at high school? He left Jujutsu to become yet another cog in the corporate machine, only to return with his tail between his legs two years later.

He resolved to hunt you down and explain the situation, and base the rest of his strategy on your reaction. Surely, if you understood what you could be dealing with, you would put your vitriol aside for the sake of survival. Wouldn't you?

You had taken Shoko's words to heart, and planned to tell Nanami about your feelings for him. Even if he didn't reciprocate them, you could have some closure and move on from this silly crush. Right?

You spent a few weeks mulling over how to do it and what to say. You wanted to do it right, to do it perfectly, as if your gesture could cosmically alter his feelings towards you and make him like you back. When he and Haibara were away on a mission together, you planned it all out with the help of Shoko, who was impressed that you were actually acting on your feelings. You would greet the two when they arrived back, before asking Nanami for a private word and quietly confessing when you were both alone.

You didn't expect Haibara to arrive back in a body bag.

When Nanami - Kento - told you what had happened, you fell to your knees, your body wracked with sobs. Any previous fixations on romance left your body and gave way to an aching grief, mourning over your friend. The dynamic of your class had once again shifted, but this time, a gaping hole was left. It felt as if Haibara had taken all of the warmth and sun to the afterlife with him, his happy disposition being sorely missed in a room full of loss and sadness.

All of a sudden, it was just you and Kento. The two of you became inseparable, your grief slowly bringing the two of you even further together. It felt as though he was the only one who could understand you, that understood what you were going through as you powered on with your Jujutsu education, saving as many as you could. You wanted to act on your feelings for him, like you had once resolved to, but neither of you could escape the reality of the danger of your profession - what was once a looming warning, one of the infinite possibilities of the future, now became one of the two paths you could walk: live or die.

Nanami climbed the sole staircase that remained intact slowly, staying aware of his surroundings in case the remaining curse decided to ambush him on his climb. His caution was thrown to the wind, however, when he heard a scream that he just knew was yours.

He barrelled at full speed towards where the scream came from, stopping only when he saw the large curse standing over your body, your leg bent at an unnatural angle, with its back to him.

"Oh fuck..." He mumbled, barely audible.

"NANAMI!" You shouted, panic evident on your face - you hadn't noticed him yet. "Nanami!" Your shout was quieter the second time, closer to a sob than a scream. As much as it killed him to see you in pain, to see you desperately calling for him, he stayed silent, the curse between the two of you distracted by you. I'm sorry, he thought, mentally apologising to you for using you as a pawn in his plan to exorcise this curse, but I'm here, and I won't let you die.

"He's gone." Satoru Gojo said simply as you walked back onto the grounds of Jujutsu Tech in a search for Shoko to patch up the wounds from the mission you're returning from.

"Wow, hello to you too, Gojo. Yeah, the mission went well, thanks for asking. A couple of scrapes, but I'm not too banged up." You rolled your eyes at Gojo's lack of greeting.

"Nanami. He's gone." It was as if your heart stopped.

"Gone? What do you mean he's gone? Dead?" You asked quietly, tears filling your eyes, fearing the worst.

"No, not dead." A sigh of relief, "but he's left Jujutsu. He's gone to be a salaryman at some fancy company."

"Yeah, funny joke, Gojo. Where is he actually?" You asked, rolling your eyes at his antics.

"No, he's actually left." His tone lacked the playfulness that normally always underlies it - he was being deadly serious.

"What?" You asked, confusion written all over your face/

"I'm sorry, he said he wanted nothing to do with sorcery anymore." You picked up what Gojo was implying - he wants nothing to do with me.

"That bastard." You mumbled.

"What was that?"

"That bastard." You spat, "how dare he. How dare he. He leaves, wanting nothing to do with us - with me - and doesn't have the balls to tell me himself? I have to hear it from you?"

"Woah, you're mad at Nanamin, not me!"

"Do not mention him in front of me again. If he wants nothing to do with me, that's fine. I want nothing to do with him, the coward."

All you could feel was fiery hot pain, sprawled on the floor, unable to even stand up, never mind run away from the curse in front of you. "Nanami! Help, please!" You screamed again and again, hoping your colleague might hear you.

"It's too dangerous for one sorcerer to go alone." Yaga's words rung through your ears. You mentally scolded yourself - why had you let your anger at Nanami cloud your judgement during an evidently dangerous mission? You had agreed to split up because you just wanted to get on with it, to get away from him, and get home as soon as you could. Why didn't you stop to just think? To strategize before running head first into a fight? This is how sorcerers die, you thought, this is how I die. Why did I never listen to Shoko as she explained reverse curse technique?

You tried to get away from the curse, using your arms to pull you across the floor, wincing every time your injured leg scraped across the floor, rubble digging into it. Eventually, your arms gave up, and you were ebbing in and out of consciousness. You stopped trying to move, curling your body into a small ball in an attempt to shrink away from the curse's line of sight. You let out a small, "Kento, please.." - a whimper more than any real form of speech - before passing out completely.

Nanami had heard every one of your cries as he fought the curse. You never once realised he was there - he put that up to a delirium that must have been brought on by the pain you had felt. This curse had at least ten times the power of the previous one he had thought, and fighting it without you was a challenge. After revealing his technique to increase its power, he eventually managed to get the upper hand - he managed to outwit it, trapping it under some rubble and exorcising it accordingly. He had no time to revel in his victory, though, as as soon as it started disappearing he was rushing to your side.

There's a pulse, thank God. Her leg is undoubtedly broken, probably in more places than one. She seems to have hurt her head too, but I can't tell if she has a concussion whilst she's unconscious. This is my fault - why did I suggest we split up? Yaga told us this was dangerous. I should've considered this outcome.

He called Ijichi, letting him know that both curses had been exorcised and that you had been badly injured, so he was to come and collect you both as soon as possible and take you straight to Ieri. Nanami gently put one arm underneath your neck, the other under your knees, being careful as to not grip the broken leg.

"I'm sorry." He whispered to your unconscious form, lifting you off the ground. You breathed in sharply, but didn't wake - at least you were somewhat responsive. He carried you down the stairs to the ground floor of the abandoned building as quickly as he could without jostling you too much, and placing you gently in the back of Ijichi's car. He got in after you, placing your head on his lap as you laid across the back seat. "Why did I let this happen to you?" He mumbled, moving a bloodied lock of your hair from your face.

"What was that? Did you say something, Nanami?" Ijichi asked, looking at him through the rear-view mirror.

"No. How long until we get back to the school?"

"About half an hour."

"Drive faster." His tone had no room for arguing, and Ijichi found himself starting to ignore the speed limits of the roads back to Jujutsu High.

You woke up in the white, sterile room that could only be the Infirmary at Jujutsu Tech.

"Good, you're awake. You scared us." Shoko said, standing over you.

"I make your life more interesting, what can I say?"

"Wow, you've been out for hours and you start cracking jokes. At least I know that head wound didn't do too much damage."

"Head wound?"

"You broke your left femur and fibula, and we think you hit your head on the way down."

"Is Nanami okay?"

"Why don't you ask him?"

"I'm not talking to him."

"He has been sat here since we arrived back." Another voice from across the room butt into your conversation with Shoko. You turned your head, and sure enough Nanami was sat there, the first few buttons of his shirt undone, having taken off his tie and suit jacket. His hair was now dry, but he hadn't restyled it, so it was still flat to his head. You couldn't see any injuries on him.

"I'm still not talking to you."

"Really? After I saved your life? After you were calling out to me to come and save you? You were certainly talking to me then."

"Fuck you."

"Nanami, leave." Shoko interrupted. "I'm not having her work herself up and undoing all my hard work." He sighed, but gave in and left the room. Your friend turned your attention back to you, "I've healed your injuries, but take it easy. Your leg is going to take some physio to get it back to where it was."

"So... I can go?"

"You want to get away from me so quickly? I'm hurt. But yeah, you can go. Although you need to take it easy for a week or so, alright? You were pretty banged up when Nanami brought you in."

"He brought me in?"

"Carried you in here himself. Refused to let anyone but me touch you."

"Oh."

"I didn't know he was back, did you?" She asked, eyeing you sceptically.

"Not until we got assigned this mission together."

"He's still into you, y'know."

"Fuck off, Sho."

"I'm being serious, I promise. You didn't see how worried he was when he arrived with you unconscious."

"I don't care. I hate him."

"You keep saying that, but I don't believe you. Never have. I know how much you cared about him. That doesn't go away overnight."

"It wasn't overnight, Sho. He was gone for two years." She hummed, but you know she wasn't agreeing with you. "I thought you were leaving?" she changed the subject.

"I am. I'll see you later." You hopped off your bed, stumbling a bit as you stood.

"I had better not see you in that state again any time soon!" Shoko called after you as you walked out of the infirmary.

"I'm a big girl, I can look after myself!" You called back, smiling slightly.

"How are you feeling?" At the sound of Nanami's voice, your small smile dropped.

"Have you been loitering outside of the Infirmary? Creep."

"I was waiting for you, because I was worried about you. That's not creepy, that's being a decent person."

"Fuck off. You know I'm not talking to you."

"So you keep saying. But why? Why won't you talk to me? Engage in a normal conversation like an adult?"

"Why? Are you actually asking me why I'm mad at you? You prick." You looked at him, gobsmacked. He didn't remember what happened? Or perhaps he remembered but didn't see the problem with it. The thought made your anger burn brighter.

“It has been two years since we last saw each other.”

“Oh I am well aware of how long it has been, Nanami.” You scoffed. He remained collected, and that just made you even more mad. Did he not care? The two of you had been so close before he left. Was he fine with throwing all of that away, with you spending the rest of your life despising him?

“Then why are you lording something I did - that I can’t even remember - over my head to the point that you will only speak to me if it is throwing obscenities my way?”

“It is not something you did.” You weren’t shouting anymore. Instead, your voice was quiet, but not calm. Pure fury coated every word, and you were practically spitting them out, “It was something you didn’t do.” You saw regret flash in Nanami’s face, and knew that he had finally figured out why you had been angry at him for so long.

“You left,” you carried on, “you left me here. Alone. And you know who I found out from? Satoru fucking Gojo. So not only did you leave, you left without telling me. WIthout talking to me about that decision. You were my best friend, I was in love with you, for fuck’s sake, and you left without having the balls to say goodbye. So yeah, I’m pissed. You knew what you were doing, and you still took the coward’s way out. Then you swan in here, in your fancy suit and your new hair acting like everything is hunky-fucking-dory. Well, it’s not.” Your voice cracked, anger dissipating into the sadness you never let yourself feel. “I have spent the past two years hating you, because it was easier than acknowledging how much I missed you. I was - am - so lonely and it was all your fault. Because you left. You left and you didn’t even tell me you were considering leaving. It was supposed to be us against the world. We were best friends, yet you didn’t care enough to say goodbye.” You turned on your heel, ready to walk away. You didn’t want him to see the tears threatening to fall down your cheeks, to see the broken heart he left you with written all over your face. You didn’t make it far though, because he grabbed your wrist.

He grabbed your wrist, spinning you around as he pulled you into his arms and kissed you. His lips were soft and warm, a stark contrast from his cold, reserved demeanour he had always worn. You melted into his embrace, and it felt so right, you were kissing Kento Nanami. You were kissing Kento Nanami - no. This was wrong. This was all wrong. You went rigid in his embrace, pulling away, shaking your head, tears running down your face.

“No. No. You don’t get to do this.” You took a few steps away from him, shaking your head vigorously. “You don’t get to kiss me and act like it solves everything. One kiss does not erase the hurt that I felt - that you caused. No. Get away from me.”

“Wait, please. Let me- let me explain myself. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that. But please, listen to me. You can go on hating me afterwards, but I won’t ever be able to look at you again if I don’t explain.” You didn’t say anything, but didn’t walk away, either. He took it as a cue for him to continue.

“I hated Jujutsu society. I had to get away, to live outside of it for a while, but that was worse. Because you weren’t there. The only thing I had to think about was money, it was a miserable existence, so I came back. I didn’t know what I expected when I returned. But you were here, and even if you refused to speak to me, knowing that you were okay, that you were well and healthy, made my life infinitely better.”

“I don’t care that you left. I knew you hated it here. I care that you didn’t talk to me. You didn’t tell me that you wanted to leave, or even that you were leaving. It’s that you wanted nothing to do with me, so much so that you didn’t even have the common decency to say goodbye.”

“I couldn’t say goodbye to you,” you could hear the emotion in his voice, the vulnerability, “because I knew that if I did, I would have asked you to come with me. And I couldn’t do that to you.”

“If you had asked, I would have gone.”

“I know. But you thrive here, and I couldn’t drag you away from it and into a miserable life outside of sorcery.”

“I wouldn’t have been miserable. I would’ve had you.”

“You can have me now, if that’s what you want. I love you. I always have. I loved you before we were even friends, I was just too scared to even talk to you. Please, I love you. And I always will, even if you spend the rest of my life hating me.”

“No, you don’t. You can’t love me. Because you don’t know me. You love the person I was, the person you knew, and the person you think I am. We haven’t seen or even spoken to each other in two years, Nanami. We’ve grown up. We’ve changed. Neither of us are the person the other one thinks we are.”

“Then let me get to know you, please. We can start slow. Let me take you to dinner. We can start it like you would any other relationship. But I need to have you in my life.”

“Nanami, I-”

“Kento, please. You calling me by my last name isn’t right.”

“Kento, I don’t know. It’s so complicated, it will be so messy-”

“You are worth it, though. You loved me once - do you think you will be able to love me again?”

“I don’t know.” There was a beat of silence, “But I’m willing to try.” A smile lit up his face, one that reminded you of the days of your youth - the pure happiness he had always brought you. It gave you hope for your future, for your future together.

“Okay.” He said quietly, “are you free tonight?”

“Tonight? Eager, are we?”

“I have to make up for lost time, my dear.” You both looked at each other, tears staining your faces but wide smiles adorning them also.

“Tonight it is then. Pick me up at seven?”

“Five.”

“Five is too early, I need to get ready.”

“Six then.”

“Half past six.”

“Done.”

270 notes · View notes

classygreydove · 20 days ago

Text

Read a comment bashing lwj...

This is a very long rant about why I love lan wangji's character and why I think his behavior towards Wei Wuxian pre-sunshot campaign make sense. Some events I talk about might be out of order, because I'm rambling. Spoilers for scenes from Audio drama, cdrama, and the other mdzs canons.

So I accidentally read a comment bashing lwj and it made me so mad. Mostly because I found it incredibly inaccurate in interpreting his actions and his relationship with WWX. I can understand not liking LWJ just because his personality isn't one everyone would click with, but hating on him for inaccurate assessment of his character?! It feels like an injustice. So I'm going to share why his character is so fascinating to me, and why his actions make sense.

LWJ is one of my favorite characters for a reason, and there's a reason WWX likes this guy. Was LWJ's behavior as a teen towards wwx dumb? Yes. He was a teenager, lashing out because he had all these feelings and he was scared of being like his parents and scared of the idea that the things he'd been taught about the world was wrong, and he was angry because he couldn't control anything or make it align with that worldview, and he was so full of attraction and fascination and desire that frightened him, because the world and his clan had taught him it was wrong. And it was all happening because of this beautiful, bright boy, who wouldn't obey any of the rules LWJ had been taught made someone "good", but who was somehow so good anyway (which he learns from the Waterborne Abyss incident, when WWX rescues Su She). LWJ has been thrown into a hormonal, existential chaos.

He's never learned to communicate because he's never had a single friend in his life, and he hadn't had anyone to teach him all the ways love could be good, could be healthy, could be a blessing. Only that it was a sin, and that he was bad to have those feelings. He hadn't had anyone to teach him how to manage his emotions in a healthy way, or how to trust his own sense of right and wrong even over what others told him.

And here's this boy, who laughs at, disregards, disrespects LWJ's home and the wisdom he's been taught to look up to all his life. His clan's history and methods. And he's so beautiful, but it feels like this boy is laughing at him. And this boy is so charming, and every time he flirts or is friendly he must be making fun of LWJ because no one has ever teased him like this, or treated him in such a friendly way. Of course WWX doesn't actually want to be friends, or isn't really flirting. He has so many other friends, why would he want to be friends with LWJ? He just wants to get out of punishment, or be entertained. And he likes girls, so of course his flirting with LWJ is only to make fun.

And LWJ feels so vulnerable when WWX flirts, because he wants WWX to look at him and call him handsome, and maybe he's scared WWX sees that. So of course he's going to ignore him, avoid him. Of course he's going to respond with "Shameless!" and "Boring!" He thinks WWX is making fun of him. He thinks WWX is going to hurt him, if LWJ softens. And these emotions are so strong. What if they grow out of control, to the point his love becomes something that poisons, stifles, or hurts? That's a recipe for textbook anxious avoidant attachment style right there (I would know lol i am also this way).

And No wonder he reacted so strongly to the spring book prank. I think bro felt terrified/furious WWX had perceived, in some way, his own desires. And thought WWX was making fun of him. To me, this hits a lot more strongly in the cdrama, especially as the spring book cdrama!WWX used was of the cut-sleeve variety.

And when WWX knocks him over the wall, so sure LWJ will reveal that he's just like the rest of GusuLan, who just want to have rules to feel morally superior over others, enforcing them selectively but not applying them if it suits them (see: LQR) LWJ is determined to prove him wrong, and takes punishment along WWX for being outside the walls after curfew. And here's where WWX's (more negative) opinion of LWJ's character begins to change. He sees that LWJ is genuine in his desire to do good, to be morally righteous. And that makes LWJ stand out against so much of the rest of the cultivation world.

But LWJ still thinks WWX is teasing him maliciously, even when WWX announces that his opinion of LWJ has changed and he wants to be friends. LWJ is still heavily on guard, and again, WWX is approaching him when LWJ feels very vulnerable, given he's undressed in the cold spring, and WWX is also getting undressed in the cold spring. And then WWX says he'll introduce LWJ to girls. Again: he's vulnerable, feeling wrong, feeling made fun of, so he pulls away.

I don't think LWJ really starts to let down his guard until after WWX brings him the rabbits as a gift. Because WWX brought them, and even if he felt vulnerable and teased during that exchange, they were still a gift, proof that WWX had thought of him outside of just their exchanges during WWX's punishment. It is a much kinder feeling of being perceived than the spring book was.

And then WWX is kicked out of lectures, and LWJ doesn't see him again until indoctrination, but even though he was hoping-not-hoping with WWX gone the feelings would fade, instead he writes a love song because he can't get WWX out of his head. All his pulling away and guarding himself seems to be for naught. In the audio drama (the lotus seed pod extra) he even goes to a lotus pond to pick the seed pods with the stems attached because he missed WWX and was thinking about the things he'd shared about his home. He wanted to know about the things WWX liked, the things WWX experienced in his home, even if he wasn't brave enough to go to Lotus Pier directly. [EDIT: It was pointed out that this extra appeared first in the novel.]

And then there's the Discussion Conference, where WWX pulls off LWJ's forehead ribbon. I imagine this event caused LWJ to feel humiliated, ashamed, angry, (and even more horrifyingly to LWJ, pleased on some level that it was WWX) and exposed in front of the entire cultivation society. It might not "seem like a big deal" to a lot of fans because to us it's just a strip of fabric no matter how symbolic, but in this case it is very important that we imagine the gravity of this to understand where LWJ is coming from. For better understanding I would compare it to a lot of modern spiritual practices that use clothing in similar symbolic ways, and we would never want to disrespect someone by disrespecting that clothing, even if it is not a practice we personally follow. And WWX pulling the ribbon off in front of pretty much everyone (many of whom went to lectures at Cloud Recesses), including LWJ's own clan, who understand perfectly what it meant that WWX did that? Mortifying. And then his own clan reassures him that "it doesn't count" because WWX is a man, which must have been really invalidating to LWJ in its own way. So any progress on the friendship front/ideas of softening his guard on LWJ's part is gone. Toast.

And then his home has been burnt to the ground, his brother in hiding, and his leg broken. It's no surprise he's going to spurn WWX at indoctrination. He's grieving, stressed out more than he's ever been, in so much pain. LWJ probably feels really overwhelmed, overstimulated, and unsafe. He just cannot deal with All the Emotions About Wei Wuxian on top of that, and how would he even begin to tell WWX what had happened? He'd prefer to just avoid, avoid, avoid. (In the cdrama, I think he's also trying to distance himself so WWX won't draw the attention of WC.) And when WWX flirts with Mianmian, LWJ has had it up to here. He has no idea WWX is just trying to get medicine for him. And when WWX wants to carry him, the last thing LWJ probably wants is to be vulnerable with wwx in this very unsafe situation, where the Wens are constantly looking for weakness. So he brushes him off.

Then in the cave, LWJ is one of the first (along with JZX to resist the Wens and protect Mianmian. And then he stays behind with WWX and pushes him out of the way of the Xuanwu to get bitten instead. That speaks volumes about his character.

And then there's the whole debacle where LWJ is furious about the branding scar. I know he's of course jealous about the whole Mianmian thing, and WWX trying to lighten the mood/distract LWJ the way he distracts the Jiang siblings by going on about being a dashing hero protecting a maiden, but that just pisses LWJ off more, and I believe it's because LWJ is mad that WWX is treating the matter so lightly, because to him, love and devotion and self-sacrifically pushing people out of the way of danger is so powerful it feels like he's drowning, and WWX is over here like "haha she'll always remember me isn't that nice" and "it doesn't matter that i got hurt because it would have hurt her worse bc of beauty/reputation/the consequences of a woman losing her beauty" (which, kudos to WWX for understanding the ways women are affected by patriarchy, and beauty as a form of power/a tool for a future)

But LWJ is over here, viciously reminded he's not special and WWX would help and flirt with anyone and (seemingly) not think twice about it. Another thought process he could be having could be: but you got hurt. and that is unacceptable, and I hate that you're trying to say it like it is acceptable, bc it's like you don't care, and I care so much it feels like it could kill me. (I'm extrapolating a bit about this thought process here, but it seems plausible enough to me)

And then there's the whole thing where earlier WWX had made LWJ gay-panic hard enough to spit up blood, and then promptly reassured him he doesn't like guys. LWJ didn't need this on top of all the stress, and WWX just took off his headband to make a splint again, and so its presence isn't there to press him into restraint, and now the Mianmian thing, all the stress and adrenaline just come crashing down and bro just can't take it anymore and bites WWX bc maybe he he's mad that WWX has made the impact of a meteor strike in his life and it seems like WWX doesn't take more than a passing thought to those he impacts so deeply. So in all his deep and torrential emotions, bro is just like "I'll make you remember, even just a little bit, the way I remember you." I think in any other circumstance, LWJ wouldn't have lashed out in this way. It took so much for him to reach this point. Should he have bitten WWX? No. Do I understand why he did? Yeah.

And then LWJ tells WWX about Cloud Recesses and cries, for obvious reasons.

And so to call his behavior "abuse" towards WWX at any point in this timeline makes literally no sense at all (though unfortunately that was what the comment called it), and it tore me up to think about it. This is a very long post, and I have a lot to say about LWJ's actions during and post sunshot, but I'm tired so I'll just leave this here. Feel free to share your insights and what you love about LWJ's character. Also, if you have fic recs for favorite LWJ characterizations, please share! I'd love to read them.

TL;DR - Lwj's behavior and treatment of WWX pre-sunshot makes sense in context of his pov. He's flawed, but that's what makes him such a great character, and I love him for good reason.

#the untamed #lan wangji #wei wuxian #cql #mdzs #wangxian #chen qing ling #lan zhan #mo dao zu shi #lan wangji my beloved #character analysis #mdzs donghua #cloud recesses study arc #xuanwu cave

98 notes · View notes

nightsunecilpse · 2 months ago

Text

I feel like some of the fandom misinterpreted the Earth's and Luna's relationship. They either say they're little brother and big brother or father and son coded. I am not sure how your guy's families treat each other but that's not a family dynamic. The Earth treats Luna like a pet but he is also highly dependent on him. Like, have you noticed that Earth never calls Luna his friend, not once? But Luna says they are. During the moon Revelation arc, Titian even calls out the obvious power dynamic between the two. The Earth and Luna are in a codependent relationship, and I'll try to give examples of how.

Before the Earth redemption arc, Luna stated that "sometimes he makes me feel like I don't matter." After a talk with Astrodude, Luna leaves Earth, then comes back, and Earth demands Luna to go back to orbit because he's off his axis. Moon doesn't even care how Earth said it, he feels satisfied he has made his point. Earth only talks positively about Luna when he's bragging, and after finding out Luna is drifting away, Earth blames Luna. Earth was hurt hearing this but not because he likes Luna, it's because he wants his Earthlings to become a type 5 civilization. Having Luna is an important part of life, if Luna leaves, it will kill all his dreams and his earthlings. Even after they learn the truth and Luna tells Earth to enjoy the time they have left, Earth can't get over the fact that his moon is leaving and still blames him. Ignoring how Luna feels and focusing on his feelings.

For Luna, Earth is his closest friend but it's a complicated relationship. He has been seen reading a book called 'The Moon Is a Harsh Mistress'. The book is apparently about a colony on the moon that trades crops and goods for less than its worth. But it is not as if these people have a choice because they can't leave due to their bodies being affected by the moon's gravity and going to Earth after long periods will kill them. If that detail is referring to anything, it could mean that Luna feels as if Earth is giving him less than what he does for him in return. To Luna, the Earth means a lot, but despite wanting to leave Earth sometimes, he always comes back hoping Earth will change while knowing deep down he won't; post redemption arc.

Luna is more aware than any other celestial body that the Earth has been through a lot. It could be that for millions of years, Luna has been protecting Earth from any sort of danger, let it be emotional or physical. Side effects were Luna having to excuse Earth's behavior whenever he's messed up and being treated as a tool. It could be that Luna is aware of the gravity of Earth's situation and feels partially responsible for his actions. Like how he tried to apologize on behalf of Earth when he said offensive things to Titian or how he tried to save Astrodude from Titian because he's one of Earth's Earthlings. He did go to Earth to get him to fix the problem he made but Venus rejects Luna's advice and enables Earth's behavior. This doesn't stop Luna from trying to help Astrodude despite the insolent ways the planets talk to him.

Moreover, Luna is always looking out for Earth because he cares about him and wants him to be the good friend he knows he could be. He's seen him through his best and worst and still holds hope for him. I mean, Luna is so focused on Earth to the point he's not even familiar with Earth's orbital neighborhood. He would rather be with Earth than anyone else. He just wants Earth to treat him better.

On Earth's side of their relationship, he sees Luna as a reluctant necessity in order to keep life from dying. Admitting he was only starting to like him around because he had the best moon out of any rocky planet. He has a need to feel superior because, on his surface, life is constantly taking advantage of him. To him, dealing with all this pain makes him better because it means he's resilient. His earthlings' lives mean so much to him yet it's killing him. Sometimes he was willing to gamble their lives for fun and admitted he wanted to start over if things didn't get better. Being responsible for things smaller than you and them treating you like garbage, all the while still trying to be a good place to live really took a toll on his outside relationships. For Luna and him, it causes him to look down on Luna for being not like him. He values Mars for being the most like him; even if Earth is never open to his struggles and sees him as his lesser. Have it be Mars is his best friend. Luna's value is to be his shield and keep him on his axis. To him, Luna is less than a planet, so an inferior celestial body he can push around. However, without him, he becomes increasingly mentally unstable if left alone for long. During his hallucination, Luna is the one that hurts the most. When hallucination Luna tells him that he had enough, it has him in tears. Revealing his deepest turmoil between the two and his fear of abandonment.

Luna is Earth's most important relationship, and even after his redemption arc, he doesn't see that. Earth has been so comfortable with Luna's constant defense and loyalty that he doesn't even notice him. Yet when he's gone he spirals because he needs him to keep him stable. Luna has always been there through his best and worst, as said before, so suddenly, not having him there is like a piece of himself going missing. He is so emotionally dependent on others that when no one wants to be his friend anymore, he tries to end himself. He honestly thought everyone would be happier because his actions had caused a rift he thought he couldn't mend. Thankfully, Mercury and Luna stopped him and helped humble him, which in return helped his relationship with the other planets and Luna. However, Earth is treating Luna better, but it doesn't mean they're on equal terms. Earth appreciates Luna's importance but still doesn't involve him with the other planets' shenanigans, making him feel left out.

In summary, the relationship between Earth and Luna is one of mutual dependence. Earth, while dominant, relies on Luna to sustain life on its surface. Luna, in turn, plays a more passive role, accepting the kindness from Earth but also providing essential support. Their connection is crucial, preventing them from drifting apart. Although their dynamic may not be perfectly balanced at present, there is hope that they can strengthen their friendship and achieve a more equal partnership in the future.

#solar balls #solarballs #solarballs earth #solarballs luna

64 notes · View notes

frudoo · 7 months ago

Text

Mister Asylum — Simon “Ghost” Riley

Warnings: Suicidal ideation, suicide attempt, hospitilization.

Patient!Simon Riley x Fem!Nurse!Reader

1 | 2

Simon always knew that his life would end this way—head pressed against the barrel of a waiting gun, emotionless eyes staring straight ahead, preparing. He never expected it to be by his own hand, though he couldn’t let himself be surprised, could he? Years of abuse, trauma, bloodshed, scorn. He’s hardly a saint. This ending is better than the one he expected, for himself, for the rest of the world. Maybe even more merciful than the death he truly deserves.

He sits with his legs criss-crossed in the middle of his living room that remains decorated with nothing more than a simple glass top coffee table and a sofa opposite of him. No rug or carpet that blood could soak into, no stains that the next homeowners would be plagued by having to deal with. Easy cleanup for the crime scene crew once the authorities would inevitably be called. It would be as if he never even lived there—a ghost resident whose demise would never be revealed even to those riddled with the most morbid curiosity.

Simon is so lost in his own calculations, that he doesn’t process the turn of a spare key in the lock of his front door as he digs the pistol further into his temple, jaw clenched so tightly that the tendon is sore. He didn’t anticipate that Johnny had decided to visit, and he surely didn’t expect the gun to be knocked out of his hand and his large body to be tackled to the floor by his sergeant. The weapon goes off but the bullet doesn’t blast through his skull like he’d planned—instead, it fires at the couch cushion and settles in the fuzzy depths, right where he would usually sit on a lazy afternoon.

He almost doesn’t process the way Johnny’s tears spill onto his pale, maskless face, the way the Scotsman holds his wrists down above his head and against the wooden tile with one hand as he calls Captain Price with the other. Not that Simon needed to be held down. He was far too weary and defeated to fight. His voice was stuck in his raw, aching throat until the sergeant cupped his face in his hands, desperation and anger written on his features.

“Shoulda let m’go, Johnny,” Simon rasps, blank brown eyes staring at the ceiling, unwilling to look his best mate in the eye.

“Ne’er, LT,” Johnny lightly smacks the lieutenant’s cheeks affectionately, once-bright blue eyes now tinged with worry as they dart between his friend and the door.

The captain eventually arrives and helps Johnny escort Simon outside, into his truck. The three men sit in silence in the driveway for a while until John speaks up.

“You understand we can’t let you be alone anymore,” his usual gruff voice softened with something akin to sadness—sympathy, maybe.

“Yes, sir,” Simon nods, hands clasped together, resting in his lap.

“Nor can we let you go on any missions. Protocol won’t allow it, and quite frankly, I’m worried you’d put yourself in harm’s way purposefully. I can’t have you or my other men getting hurt,” Price sighs, running a large hand down his face and covering his mouth, lost in thought.

“Understood, sir,” The lieutenant grunts, trying to ignore the sound of Johnny’s sniffles beside him.

“I’ve spoken with Laswell as well as my own superiors, and we’ve come to the conclusion that… institutionalization would be the best course of action.”

Simon falls silent. Take him out of the field, fine. Keep him company to make sure he’s alright, great. But being thrown into the looney bin feels more like retribution than treatment. His fists clench and he can feel the captain’s watchful eyes on him in the rearview mirror.

“Simon, this- I hope you know this wasn’t an easy decision for anyone to make. I’d much sooner call a missile strike than put you somewhere other than under my protection. But unfortunately my hands are tied.”

“Simon, ye ‘ave tae listen. Please,” Johnny rests his hand on top of one of Simon’s, trying not to let out a sob at the trembling he feels in his superior. “We need ye ‘ere.”

This isn’t right. None of this shit would have happened if he had just pulled the trigger sooner. Simon’s mind is nothing short of a maelstrom wreaking its havoc, screaming at him to jump out of this truck and book it to the nearest bridge to jump off of. He might have done just that if his body wasn’t vibrating with frustration and helplessness and blinding regret—or maybe it’s just the hot tears that blur his vision and render him unable to move or even breathe properly.

“You’re as good as a son to me, Simon. Let us do this for you. For us,” John sniffs, and if he didn’t know any better, Simon might have thought his captain was crying. “You don’t have another choice.”

Simon doesn’t speak again, rather gives a single nod to signal his compliance. An order is an order no matter how badly he wants to ignore it. All he wants to do is melt and allow the backseat of Price’s truck to absorb him. It all seems like far too much fuss just for him, an assassin, scum of the earth, a waste of precious space. He settles for blinking the tears out of his eyes and looking out the window, even allowing Johnny to keep a calloused hand on top of his own. John calls the hospital and lets them know they’ll be getting an intake.

The drive to Shadywood Hospital is a silent one save for the occasional sniffle or sigh, or the rattle of the truck’s tailgate on a particularly bumpy road. Nobody dares say anything out of fear that they’ll offend one of the other men. The last thing Price and Johnny want to do is make the situation worse, and Simon isn’t the kind to open up about his troubles, even more so now that his plan has been obliterated. He’s supposed to be a strong, unyielding leader—fearless, not this shell of a soldier who let his pain and misery take over. He used to be precisely that: an unstoppable, unbreakable force. He’s not sure when exactly that changed.

The exterior of the hospital is about as dull and lifeless as Simon expected, mossy overgrowth clinging to the weathered brick structure. It looks like something straight out of an old horror film, he thinks. All it needs is some thunderstorm sound effects and perhaps a murder of crows to warn of his impending doom. No such luck. Maybe even the darkest of forces don’t deem him worthy of such caution. Maybe even the most heinous of monsters would ridicule and cast out the enigma that he is.

“Out ye get, LT,” Johnny pats him on one broad shoulder, trained eyes scanning the lieutenant’s face for any hint of emotion be it sadness or fury.

Simon remains stoic as he steps out of the truck, batting away Price and Johnny’s hands that try to usher him inside. Not a bloody child, he thinks, though the petulance with which he crosses his arms would suggest otherwise. When the rush of cold air hits his face, he’s suddenly aware of just how naked he is without his mask and he turns around with a shake of his head.

“Not goin’ in,” he mutters, scratching at the tattoos on his left forearm so hard that he peels the skin.

Johnny grabs Simon’s wrist to get him to stop, frowning at the sight of his nails, sharp and much longer than he usually keeps them. He’s unsure of how nobody noticed that their beloved Ghost had stopped taking care of himself. John sighs and runs a hand through his hair, contemplating before nodding firmly.

“I’m sure they have a mask in there. I’ll go grab one for you, yeah?” He grins softly, patting Simon’s back fondly before stepping inside.

“Ye’ll be alreit, ye ken,” Johnny steps in front of Simon, hands resting firmly on his biceps to get him to meet his eyes. “Ye ‘ave tae be. Ye’re Ghost. Ye’re me brother.”

Simon chokes back a sob, teary eyes fixed on the darkening clouds in the dreary sky to avoid showing his weakness. It breaks him to see his sergeant so worried about him. He doesn’t deserve his pity, his fear. Price comes back before Johnny can force Simon to say anything in response.

“Here you are,” John hums, handing Simon the flimsy mask and offering him a gentle chuckle. “Black, just for you.”

Simon nods again, adjusting the flexible metal in the surgical material to fit the crooked bridge of his nose. Feeling a little less exposed, he sucks in a deep breath and turns on his heel to trudge into the hospital. The fluorescent lights nearly blind him and he furrows his eyebrows, blinking through the pain before focusing his eyes on the receptionist.

“Simon Riley,” he breathes, and the lady nods with a soft smile.

“Yes, sir. If you’ll have a seat over there, the intake nurse will be right out. Would you like your mates to-”

“Yes,” he cuts her off, nodding towards Price and Johnny who stand beside him like bodyguards. “Sorry. Yes. I’d like them to be in there with me. Please.”

“Of course,” she nods once more, offering the three men another small grin.

Simon, Price, and Johnny all sit in the waiting area impatiently. The sergeant looks around nervously while the lieutenant stays still as a statue, eyes focused on the floor. John sniffs and rubs his clammy palms on his jeans. Simon can’t remember the last time he’s seen the captain this anxious, and knowing he caused it makes him feel even worse. He shouldn’t have hesitated; he should have just pulled the trigger immediately upon holding the gun to his head. There wouldn’t have been this much trouble for the team.

The sliding doors part with a mechanical whir and heavy footsteps rush in, boots squeaking against the linoleum floor. Simon wasn’t going to pay it any mind, but Johnny stands up and goes to greet the person with a hug. He only looks up when he feels a hand on his shoulder, eyes meeting deep brown ones much like his own. Kyle.

“Simon,” Kyle whispers, placing his other hand on the lieutenant’s opposite shoulder. “Price called.”

Another wave of shame washes over Simon and he suddenly can’t bring himself to maintain eye contact with his other sergeant. He doesn’t deserve this kind of support, especially not from the entire task force. His throat closes up and it gets hard to breathe. He’s trapped in his head, locked in place, and the walls are closing in. The tears threaten to spill despite his struggle to hold them back, burning at the brink of his waterline. It’s too much, he’s suffocating, he’s about to snap-

As if right on cue, the nurse comes in and calls his name. He jumps up, shoving past Kyle to follow the woman behind the protected doors without looking back. The other three follow close after and stand with their backs to the wall, intently listening to the questions Simon is asked. The lieutenant almost laughs—he’s usually on the other side of the interrogation table.

Simon fills out the countless pages of paperwork with a shaking hand, carefully sliding the clipboard back to the nurse. He feels so small, so pathetic, having this many people watch over him like he’s a sickly babe. In a way, he supposes he is—the only difference is that an infant is worth saving.

“With the information you’ve given me, Mr. Riley, we will be admitting you effective immediately. Your progress will determine the length of your stay. We’ll be monitoring you closely each day to see how you’re doing, alright?” The nurse tilts her head sympathetically, cusping her hand over one of Simon’s. “We’re gonna get you feeling better, sir.”

Simon nods slowly, nervous eyes flickering past the woman to look between his three mates. They all have the same solemn expression on their face, each fidgeting with a different finger or article of clothing. He thinks they’d rather be getting shot at in a foreign country than here, coddling this grown man who doesn’t know how to handle his emotions. He would, too.

“I’ll give the four of you a couple of minutes to chat while I go get your bracelet ready, yeah?” The nurse excuses herself, slipping past the two sergeants that stand on either side of the door.

The men are silent, none of them exactly sure of what to say or do until Simon finally breaks down, his head falling into his hands. Pesky tears he’d been trying so hard to fight off stream down his face and soak into his mask, his broad shoulders shaking with every raspy sob that dares rip from his throat. John immediately pushes himself off the wall and embraces his lieutenant who, for the first time this evening, doesn’t bother fighting him off. Price’s large hand cradles Simon’s head to his clothed midriff, the other patting his back like a father would calm a colicky baby.

“I’ve got you, Simon. You’re gonna be alright,” John whispers, fighting back tears of his own.

The captain hasn’t seen Simon cry like this for what seems like centuries. He never wanted to witness it again, but the hidden memories come flooding back in as he presses his cheek to the top of the blond man’s head. He had sworn from the moment he met Simon that he’d never allow any harm to come to him. He’d keep every enemy away, train him perfectly so that he could protect himself. He never considered that his lieutenant’s own mind could be deemed an enemy.

Johnny can’t stand the sight any longer—he shoves the door open and books it out of the hospital, back sliding down against the cracked brick as he brings his knees to his chest. Kyle follows quickly after, sitting beside his fellow sergeant, silent and seething, angry at himself for being so clueless. How could none of them, not one, see that Simon was doing so poorly?

Simon notes their absence even in the comforting arms of the only father figure he’s ever known.

#cw: suicidal ideation #call of duty #cod #cod mw2 #captain john price #kyle gaz garrick #johnny soap mactavish #simon ghost riley #simon riley x reader #cod mw3 #Spotify

100 notes · View notes

antebunny · 2 months ago

Text

jealousy, jealousy

Tim cannot stand the sight of Jason and Damian getting along. They are brothers, so it happens quite often. Damian sniffs and says something pithy, Jason chuckles and pats him like you would an angry little kitten. Damian, feathers ruffled, demands Jason remove his hand from Damian before Damian removes it from his body. Jason scruffs him even harder. Sometimes they slip into Arabic, which always mollifies Damian more than English.

“I don’t get what your problem is,” Steph says.

She’s sprawled on her new purple English roll arm couch that Tim got her for her birthday. He got her a lot of things, actually, and then they got into a huge fight because Steph felt bought and condescended to and Tim felt hurt because he’d only wanted to do something nice for his best friend. God, you’re just like B, she’d accused, and wasn’t it just terrible that Tim would’ve taken that as a compliment if not for her tone?

In the end, she kept the couch, and Tim sometimes comes over and watches trashy TV with her until the neon horror of real life bleeds into LED pixels and A24 dreamscapes. He’s been doing that more and more ever since Red Hood. Ever since he couldn’t look at Dick Grayson, his so-called big brother, and feel like he’s being squeezed out. Steph hasn’t complained. Yet.

“So the biggest asshole gets along with the tiniest brat. So what?”

“It would be easier if Damian wasn’t so…” Tim gestures with his bowl of popcorn. “Damian.”

It’s impossible to capture the sheer Damian-ness of Damian in a single a adjective. Tim had been excited to become an older brother. He thought he could do what Dick did for him. Tim failed to realize just how much he was not and could never be Dick Grayson.

Steph snorts. “Well-said.”

“You say it better than,” Tim retorts. He stuffs a handful of popcorn in his mouth and pretends to pay attention to whatever is on Steph’s TV screen.

“He’s got a need to prove himself wrapped in a superiority complex,” Steph says promptly.

“Emphasis on the superiority complex,” Tim mutters darkly.

Really, he’s the last person that should be joking about this, though. Most of Damian’s insults are depressingly familiar to everyone else. He mocks Barbara for being disabled, spews a barrage of nonsensical slut-shaming insults at Steph which he clearly was taught but does not understand, and denigrates Jason for being a street kid before Bruce took him in. None of that is new to them. The unexpected part is that Damian also has a slew of insults for Tim’s parentage and background. Sometimes just his skills and contributions to the Wayne family and Gotham vigilante scene, his value as a person. So while everyone else shrugs their shoulders and ignores Damian’s comments, Tim bristles and bites back the urge to attack Damian back. He has never before experienced this blatant disregard and condescension towards Tim as a person, and he cannot stand it.

But he’s the only one.

Bruce alone escapes Damian’s attacks and welcomes his new son with open arms. Alfred, Barbara and Dick are too good and too patient to do anything but calmly and lovingly try to teach Damian better. Steph can’t be bothered to care. And Jason, the only one whom Tim thought he could trust to dislike Damian, bonded with the brat while with the League of Assassins, and now takes his big brother duties very seriously.

Tim is alone. He feels like such a petty, immature, insecure crybaby whining about how Jason and Damian get alone, but goddammit he hates feeling alone.

#tim drake #batfam #my fanfiction #my writing #drabble #damian wayne #he's there in spirit #batman #robin

48 notes · View notes

shanastoryteller · 1 year ago

Note

Happy Hanukkah! FMA?

a continuation of 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15

Major Armstrong is her commander and her friend and she thinks that if he'd told her to part the sea then it would have been a more reasonable order than the last one he gave her.

Protecting Edward is more than a full time job and she's not even good at it. Maybe it's more of a religion. Most people aren't good at those either.

She and Denny take turns. One to stay with and sleep in front of Ed, the other to guard the door. A structure of glass rather than cloth at least means that no one's forcing their way in without them noticing.

Ed's been out with a fever for almost two days. It's not uncommon, and in fact is becoming more and more common that she and Denny have had several conversations about sending a missive to the general about it, but it means until he comes out of it they're on their own.

Everyone knows how possessive Ed is of them. Everyone knows how he has them act in his name and lets them use his authority and how very, very pissed off he would be if they were ignored. It's the only protection he can give them when he's dead to the world.

It means they can turn away superior officers and ignore orders and a host of other things that could them court martialed or killed in wartime.

But that only does them any good if the person in question has a healthy fear of the power and authority of the Fullmetal Alchemist.

"Riza," she greets, spine straight, hand already on her gun like that will do her any good. She'd have a bullet between her eyes by the time it was half raised.

"Maria," she returns, eyes dark. She's in fatigues and Maria can't see a gun in her hand but that doesn't mean shit. "I don't want to hurt you."

"You don't understand," she says, trying not to plead.

"He's a monster," Riza says.

He's not, and even if he was, "Look around, Riza. Look in a mirror, for fuck's sake."

That gets her a flinch, at least.

But then there's a gun in Riza's hand and Maria opens her mouth to shout a warning to Denny, so maybe he can be something other than one more body between Edward and his killer.

She doesn't get the chance.

#prompt answers #prompts are closed #asks #anon #fma

329 notes · View notes

lovifie · 11 months ago

Text

Hormones Pt.2 🧡

Enemies to lovers | Fluff | smut | 2400 words | Masterlist

Part 1 - Next Part

Simon's POV

Simon was excited you joined, really. Even if you were not officially part of the team, whenever the Captain would tell him you were joining for a mission he already liked the mission better.

He loved to see the way you were around the Sergeants, the three of you being the same rank made it easier to get along; and after a couple of missions together the three of you were already close friends, almost sibling-like.

With the Captain was different of course, but it was still great. You wouldn't make call the captain a muppet like you liked to call Gaz, but would still make fun of him calling him “old man”.

Laswell liked you the best, the usually stoic woman entered now the room beaming with a smile when you were tagging along, obviously pleased with the presence of another woman.

And Simon, him… well, he tried. He really did!

Simon is aware that he is a big guy, tall, muscular and even if he has any trail of sympathy on his face it doesn't matter because it is always covered. But he wanted to make a good impression! You seemed like a nice girl, everyone on the team liked you and finally, when it was his turn to introduce himself he saw you looking up to him.

And you looked so beautiful, so genuine, so out of place on such a cruel thing the military was, he felt his heart speed up and his dick twitch a little bit.

He needed to make a great impression, so he practised in his mind “Hi, I'm Lieutenant Riley, but everyone calls me Ghost, welcome aboard, Sergeant.” It was perfect! The perfect introduction, perfectly cordial, perfectly measured, perfect everything. And yet, when the moment come, the only thing he said was: “The fuck you looking at? Want a pat on the back for making it here without shitting yourself in the process? Get the fuck out of my face, go bother somebody else.”

Simon wanted to shoot himself on his dick.

He realized he had obviously intimidated you, he was still your superior and on top of that he was an asshole to you.

But every time he tried to fix it, he would just make it worse. And at some point, you started to avoid him, and he hated it. You no longer reported to him, you went straight to Price, right over him and for a while he was both annoyed and impressed he couldn’t catch you doing it so he could afront you and ask you to report to him. To talk to him, basically.

And then he did, he was just getting out of Price's office when you were about to knock, and he quickly realized what was going on. And he was going to ask you why and to please go back to him, but the only thing he managed to say was:

“Now you are too great to speak to your immediate superior? Need to go cry to the Captain like a brat? Make sure not to wet your nappies, soldier.”

And honestly, what's his fucking problem?

He decided he was going to get over you, it wouldn't work anyway. C’mon, he was an adult, he couldn't keep getting out of his senses like this. So he decided he would just ignore you back, and eventually, he would forget about you and everything would be easier.

Until Soap caught up, and now he couldn't backtrack.

It was during sparring training, you were against Gaz and the taller man had jet to land a hit on you. It was impressive to see, how you used every single fact to your advantage. Gaz has gotten hit before on the right side of his face, hurting his eye; and you weren't even there when it happened but you quickly realized it and we're constantly moving to the right side of Gaz; annoying him and making him lose his focus.

You moved so fast out of Gaz's reach, that he would have thought you were a glitch in a video game. And once you realized Gaz was getting tired enough, you grabbed his arm on one of his punch tries and by the time Gaz realized you had grabbed him; he was already face-pressed against the floor, arms behind his back and you sitting on his hips.

Any normal person would have been impressed, maybe even a little afraid; but Simon? Simon was aching with a growing boner; something about the way you were sitting over the bigger man, you back to Simon which gave him a perfect view of your ass, the way you were breathing hard after the exercise, yeah, no wonder Soap caught on.

“Ye getting exited, LT.” He suddenly said beside him, almost making him jump. “Ye getting a thing for the wee lass? A bet ye wish ye were Gaz right now.”

“Shut the fuck up, Johnny”

He didn't, of course.

But he promised to help him.

And a couple of weeks later, there is another meeting. Supposedly, Soap has a plan; he won't tell him what is it, but he has it. And when Simon enters the room and it is boiling hot, he starts to guess what it is.

You are sitting opposite to Johnny, who smiles at Simon with a thumbs-up. Not that he looks at him for long, not when you are sitting right on the other side of the table. Wearing a tank top, tight on your body as you use your hand to fan yourself; looking up to him through your lashes, the look travelling straight to his dick. He sighs and sits down, waiting for his turn.

Simon cannot really understand how being boiled alive will help him with you, but is not like he can ask Johnny now. In the end, he's glad he let the sergeant do his thing; because the moment he stands to give his presentation he can feel your eyes on him.

He is trying really hard to stay focused, he knows by memory what he has to say, but the moment he lifts his eyes from the paper, his mind is blank and he stutters on his words. But how can he not?

Your skin is glistening with sweat and Simon can feel his mouth water because of it, little droplets drip down your neck and over the mount of your chest, light reflecting like on a mirror as your chest raises with each breath. He looks up your arm, finding your thumb between your teeth as you bite your nail; your soft lips pressing your finger, your pink tongue visible through the small space between your teeth and it sends Simon's mind in a turmoil as to what he would like to do with your mouth.

He shouldn't, he is at work and he is giving a damn presentation! He doesn't dare to look at Price, he is sure he is talking no sense at this point, but he can’t peel his eyes away from you when he can feel you look at him.

It is then that he looks at your eyes, and he swears he has never seen you look like that. You have a hunger in your eyes that causes a shiver up his back, you have a determination mixed with a desperation that has Simon weak on his knees and you are not even looking at his face. You are looking at his body, he unconsciously flexes the muscles you look at and when he sees you focus your eyes on your crotch he has the need to sigh, emptying his lungs to suppress a moan.

He looks back at the paper, trying to remain focused as he figures out where the last line he read is. He doesn't find it, because suddenly Johnny is laughing at the top of his lungs after you show him something on your phone. He cannot see it from where he is standing, and he fights with all his might not to bend down to be able to see it.

He'll ask Johnny later, once he is done with the presentation and doesn't have to fight a boner back.

He does ask him later that same day, when he is in the sergeant’s barracks lying on his bed.

“I told ye it would work, Lt.” Soap says smiling from his desk. “She's into ye, mate. Ye just need to stop being weird.”

“I'm not weird.” Simon defends himself, being interrupted by a knock on the door. Gaz pokes his head in, entering once he sees they are both inside; he wonders for a second what he is doing here until he sees you walk in just behind him.

Gaz has a brick of beers in his hand, he winks at Simon and he quickly realises he is into whatever plan Soap has orchestrated. He whips his head to look at the mastermind and finds him sitting on the other bed in the room, Gaz quickly sitting beside him; leaving only half of the bed Simon is sitting at left for you to sit.

Soap and Gaz look at him with a shit-eating grin on their faces when he looks at them, the two little shits are physically making you sit next to him, almost skin-on-skin with how much space Simon takes.

You POV

Fucking Soap.

Last fucking time you trust him with your secrets! When you left the meeting this morning, he tackled you to ask you about why you were ogling like that at the LT.

“Is not me, Soap. Is it my hormones.” You whine, trying to convince him to let it go.

“Yeah, yeah, sure. But you were drooling for HIM.” He says, accentuating it. “It hurts my pride, bonnie. We were all in the room, but ye only had eyes for him.”

“Soap, for god's sake. I looked at him for two seconds.” You argue.

“Two seconds for each ball, lass. I saw you, looking up and down his bod. Ye got a crush for the Lt, bonnie?” He asks, moving his eyebrows up and down. You look at him offended before rolling your eyes. “I'm not fifteen, Soap.”

“I know, lass. The way you were looking at him was not of a fifteen years old, you were thirsting for him. You were staring at his willy, lass.” He says cocking his head and smirking.

“No, I wasn't!” You lie, feeling embarrassed to admit something like that.

“Shoot your shot, lass. I'm pretty sure he has a thing for you too.” He says, putting his hand over your shoulder.

“Yeah, murderous thoughts.” You snort, not believing the scotsman.

He laughs at you and claps your back stepping aside. “Trust me, give it a try. Ye may not end up married, but I'm sure ye'll get your kitty pet.” He says before taking a step back and mimicking having sex doggy style making you cringe which causes him to laugh. “Come to my room later, we getting drunk.”

Simon shimmies his way a little to a side, and even though for a second you wonder about sitting at the desk, you decide it is not worth it.

This man has been just a little asshole to you since you met, and now suddenly your fucking hormones have you wanting to peel his pants off and choke on his dick. It's not fair!

So you sit down next to him, your leg touching his. He keeps his hand on his lap, only raising his hand to catch the beers can Gaz throw at him. He catches them, opens one of them and hands them to you. You grab it and mutter a thank you, looking at him and noticing him looking at the other men in the room.

Gaz and Soap quickly start to talk, filling the room with a comfortable sound and Ghost and you remain as mere spectators.

The beers get drunk fast, a warm feeling flooding everyone's bodies and everyone kind of melting onto the beds. At some point, you notice Simon move and the next thing you feel is the heavy weight of his arm over your shoulder.

You tense for a second, looking up at him, finally making eye contact with him and he says: “Sorry, luv. My arm was getting numb, you don't mind, do you?”

You shake your head, unable to speak. Simon's eyes on you, feel like a truck lying on your chest, but still, you can't peel your eyes away.

He looks down at your lips and you unconsciously lick your lips, an almost unnoticed groan leaving his throat. He caresses your arm making you jump and you get goosebumps all over your body.

“You two should make out.” Soap suddenly says, making you both look at him like he just grew a second head. Ghost is not the only one that has gotten comfy; Gaz and Soap are currently cuddling, legs tangled and Soap's head resting on Gaz's chest. “Yeah, Ghost's about to bust a nut just for looking at you, bonnie.”

You whip your head back to look at his crotch, and for the milliseconds before he covers himself you can feel the protruding bulge of his boner trying to break free from his pants.

The little horny monster on your brain is rattling at the bar of your enclosure, urging you to just throw at him. It's been too long since you got laid and Ghost it's obviously reciprocating your feelings.

Gaz starts to chuckle with Soap, your irrational mind tells you that if anything they are laughing at Ghost, but your brain only tells you that they are laughing at you. Because maybe Ghost has a boner, but you are looking up at him, opening and closing your mouth like a fish and overall looking like an idiot.

Ashamed of yourself you start to stand up from the bed. “I'm going to sleep.” You vaguely feel Ghost's hand on your wrist, not fast enough to keep you in. And you leave the room keeping their complaints about not wanting you to leave inside.

You practically run to your room, throwing yourself on your bed, tears pricking your eyes from humiliation. And you would have cried if a knock on your door didn't interrupted you.

“What?!”

“It's me, can I come in, love?”

930 notes · View notes