#like hes a super interesting character
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there are a few fan works address it but I'm never not gonna be pissed as hell on lan wangji's behalf bc his brother literally talked about his romantic feelings(and likely his grief) for wei wuxian with jin guangyao without his permission like what the actual fuck
#i would feel so hurt and betrayed#and considering the jin impetus for wei wuxians death#would feel violated#like when did that Sharing start xichen?#jfc#lan wangji#lan xichen#mdzs#mo dao zu shi#i think about this every time i read the confession scene#when did it start#while he was fucking healing for three years?#the branding?#after he knew about a yuan and that the wen were innocent#like hes a super interesting character#but xichen truly upsets me in how he treats wangjis feelings idk idk#wei ying#lan zhan
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Just wanna say that I think Ekko and Mel slander makes sense when you understand that 85% of the Arcane fandom views both of them as characters less worthy of fandom attention.
In their eyes, they are afterthoughts to more interesting relationships, so when someone in the 15% dares to give them anything outside of dutiful lamentations ("Mel and Ekko deserved better!"), they can't help but feel those analysis would be better suited for a character they *actually* like and so they lash out.
Fans of both characters have to constantly argue that these characters have loved and have been loved. They want Mel "independent" because she doesn't "need love" and they want Ekko focused on The Tree and the unnamed Firelights because they want it to be easier to carve both of them out of the interpersonal narratives that attaches fandoms to characters in the first place.
They want Mel and Ekko to "save the day" because they don't want their roles in the story to interfere with other characters that they like. Better for them to beat the Bad Guys™ than to be given more material that would validate their personal connections with other characters in ways that the fandom would prefer to ignore.
And the fact that Ekko and Mel are completely different characters who have never once interacted with each other and yet somehow both of them are being treated the same way with how the fandom constantly diminishes their relationships with the rest of the main cast leads me to believe that it does have something to do with the One Trait they do share.
#arcane fans when people say Mel and Ekko are loved by other characters: >:(#arcane fans when they see Mel and Ekko's last scenes are them alone and sad: XD#''mel deserves more than romance'' and then you check and they're a jayvik shipper#like clearly romance entices you to these characters#so you not wanting that for Mel isn't the woke feminist aromantic take you think it is#and don't even get me started on the ekko discourse#super convenient that somehow he gets last place on the who loves jinx in arcane competition#even behind a character who isn't even in the show#and suuper interesting that if his 26 minutes in ep 7 were used differently (aka on another character)--#all the show's writing problems would be fixed#anywaayyyyyy#ekko#mel medarda#arcane#meljay#timebomb#these people want the show to be about caitvi and jayvik so bad#even when they remember to say ''this show is supposed to be about the sisters!''#you can tell they're heart's not in it#doesn't matter anymore bc like who is reading all this but *aromantic-supporting take*#fandom racism
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One of my favorite headcanons is that Leo grew up watching telenovelas with Splinter.
It just works so well - his bits of Spanish that he spouts randomly, his showy way of apologizing, and, of course, his love for dramatic betrayals all point to this being a very real possibility.
Plus, it’s very cute to imagine a tiny Leo at his father’s side as they both gasp in shock when the show’s eighth plot twist in just as many episodes happens.
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt leo#rottmnt splinter#rise leo#rise splinter#rottmnt headcanons#listen - Leo is there for the camp#if a show’s gonna be super broody and stuff he’s not about it he wants the DRAMA.#very similar reasons why he loves Jupiter Jim Lou Jitsu and magicians#glam rock too!#the camp of it all#the way these things can take even heavy topics and make it more lighthearted with the way they go about them#the way each of these puts importance on putting on a show#idk I think it’s very interesting#but yeah - Leo would totally love telenovelas#did you see him apologizing to Todd??? prime telenovela actress apology right there#the long fluttery lashes the hand to the chest the shiny eyes - like it’s all there#someone said that one of the creators said the telenovelas may be canon?#if so then another tick in the box for ‘oh my god Leo is an amazingly well developed character’
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I have mixed feelings about Zerxus in season 3 of TLOVM, but I’ve gotta say hearing him give a Totally Unbiased Account of EXU: Calamity with Definitely No Omissions Whatsoever was kind of funny. Like “ooh I thought I could count on my friends….they condemned our civilisation….” Ok Zerxus. Buddy. Last time I checked, Nydas was actually the only one trying to stop Laerryn from blighting the tree. You sat there like a chump and did not help whatsoever. And uh. “They condemned our civilisation with their hubris” ummm pal I think you’re missing an important detail there. Like yes the point of EXU: Calamity is that everyone played a role in the disaster, everyone was responsible in some ways for that ship crashing into the iceberg, but uh. Zerxus I think some people were maybe a little more responsible than others. Like, for example, the certain someone who pulled the Lord of the Hells into Exandria. I think that individual’s hubris is maaaaaybe a little bit more important than some of the other hubris on the table here.
And like, this isn’t me bashing the writing, I think it is in-character for TLOVM!Zerxus to say this, since he’s been a jaded miserable devil for a thousand years. But omg when he had the CHEEK to be like “in the chaos I found myself face-to-face with the Lord of Torment himself” like EXCUSE ME??? Buddy you just happened to “find yourself” face-to-face with Asmodeus huh??? Just coincidentally, on accident??? You were just taking a stroll around Avalir and he ran into you without warning??
Zerxus. Please. Be serious for a moment. Would you like to explain to Pike the exact circumstances of HOW you found yourself face-to-face with Asmodeus, hmmmmm? A certain “pulling Asmodeus through the tree and unleashing him upon the world” situation?
Like, I know it was meant to be a serious moment with lots of Calamity-related hype but like, it was really giving “Girl what were YOU doing at the devil’s sacrament” energy. In the most literal way possible
#i just know nydas is in the afterlife listening to this and is absolutely PISSED#Like in his dying moments Nydas gave Zerxus an out to avoid becoming a devil and Zerxus willingly decided to become one anyway#and then spends his time bitching about his friends to random strangers in the hells. the Disrespect is Off The Charts#i'm sure people have already spoken about this but i just thought it was so funny#and also this isn't me hating on Zerxus I think his character is super interesting and engaging and I love how Luis played him#but like Zerxus please. You need to learn about the phrase “pot calling the kettle black”#esp bc he's seemingly like “welp time to worship The Whispered One” bro did you learn NOTHING#non witcher#critical role#the legend of vox machina#tlovm#lovm#lovm season 3#zerxus ilerez#exu calamity
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just wanted to say it's really awesome seeing the positive reception to chunky mikey LOVE YOU ALL 🧡🧡
#I WAS A LITTLE WORRIED BUT EVERYONE'S BEEN SUPER COOL he's very important to me#rottmnt#rise of the tmnt#rise mikey#rottmnt mikey#avepharts#number one reason for his design It Is Self-Care To Draw Your Characters Fat and it's fun and i wanted to#but also ! i think it's a really interesting visual contrast to apocalypse mikey (who's very bony) esp bc you'd assume mikey would live a#really hearty lifestyle. like i think f!mikey's figure is so striking to me because it feels so alien for him.#also! mikey does a lot of throwing and lifting heavy shit and in sports like deadlifting and shot-put athletes tend to have more fat muscle#and i think there should be more body diversity in acrobatic fighter characters#AND OF COURSE! he looks like raph <3#rot20mnt
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he's not even that light impulse is just really strong
#[elsewhere skizz is hit with a sudden inexplicable compulsion to teach the whole server about maslow's heirarchy of needs]#my art#tangotek#impulsesv#hermitcraft#taken completely by surprise by how much fun i'm having with the ambiguously-on-fire hair#random thing but i've actually been putting effort into drawing *fewer* fabric folds recently#it's one of those things i get like. stuck in#and i want to Simplify the Shapes#but do u guys understand. tango just has digitigrade vibes#vital to his character that he be able to scamper and clamber at a moment's notice#honestly the idea of designing shoes for nonhuman feet is super interesting#i defaulted to pseudo-claws cuz like..that's what they'd be used to using for traction? at the very least seems rude to remove that option
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more pics of the moomin nendoroid
#I mean he's cute but he only comes with a shell and an angy face...#I feel like a snufkin would be more interesting to me. he's also just more detailed as a character anyway#merch#sorry come back cause my previous tags sound so negative lmao he's ADORABLE#I was just hoping he'd have more extra stuff not just a shell lol#v v cute tho I love the pic of him sitting angy in the hand#edit: OH HE'S NOT EXPENSIVE AS I THOUGHT HE'D BE LMAO?#why was I expecting him to be like £100 or something aldjfksl he's super cheap#...oh but they can't ship it to the uk. womp womp#oh there's a goodsmile europe! yay!
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do you guys think kakuzu's ever really hard on himself bc of his time in the waterfall and then hidan just unknowingly is himself
bonus under the cut
#kakuhida#hidakaku#hidan#kakuzu#naruto#drew this while listening to vacation bible school#puts vacation bible school on my kakuhida playlist#i drew this instead of sleeping#literally just pulled an all nighter#enjoy#I just like that Hidan doesn't really give compliments#but he DOES get super excited when they have a good fight alongside eachother#he's so fcking gay for kakuzu#he is SO hot for him when they kill people together#I don't see enough character examination of kakuzu#cmon people he's SO interesting#what a character#and so is hidan#they're perfect for each other#again. i love that hidan never know wtf is going on#he has no idea what kakuzu is thinking at any given time#does not understand shit#yet he still seems to come through#thats WHY THEY ROCK AS PARTNERS#myart
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had to draw this to understand the way i feel about him now that the manga's ended. 🥲 on that note: if you like hawks and his ending, maybe don't read my tags lol. it's not bashing (imo) but they're not v nice. 😅
bg + unobstructed pose under the cut!
his expression's a lil different 'cuz i only changed the merged layer, all the lighting effects already flattened onto it. 💀 alas.
#hawks#mha hawks#bnha hawks#takami keigo#keigo takami#bnha#bnha fanart#mha#mha fanart#spoilers#bnha spoilers#mha spoilers#it's not very positive lol i don't really like the way his character ended 🥲#i think his hero worship for endeavor blinded him from seeing or doing anything that could make a difference#i was so let down when he didm't have any sort of critique or moral dilemma after the touya reveal#and just immediately supported endeavor--it made me think he wss incapable of being critical of his idol.#only further underscored with the way he remembers his endeavor plushie while he defends the rabking system.#like. he thinks about his childhood toy of his hero while he defends the system that ultimately caused that ''hero'' to ruin his family.#so blinded by that pedestal that he unironically thinks about the BIGGEST example of why the ranking system does NOT work#WHILE he defends said system.#he was introduced as this morally complicated guy and instead of his childhood worship of a flawed guy making him more interesting#by having him really THINK about what it means that his hero inadvertently created a super villain#he was instead flattened into an endeavor fan boy. and even tho he was introduced as a guy w a complicated bg of#villainous father + harshly trained by the HPSC from a young age he still doesn't do very much with the system of which he's gained charge.#if he thought of the plushie as a memory of what it meant to have a symbol of hope in his hands it's like...#hawks... abolishing the ranking system wont stop merch and news articles and good PR from happening...#anyways yeah. he was one of my faves for a really long time but the way he ends... i dont like that guy.#that being said him becoming president of the HPSC isnt smth i hate even tho idve given him a vacay and his sought-after free time.#and i like that he brings a katana around now. i tried to make the projection make it look like his epilogue self has wings.#oh and i hated the tiny epilogue panel that made it look like endeavor replaced his entire set of kids. :) just. absolutely loathed it. :))
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Mal's Avatar: The Last Airbender rewatch: The beach 3.05
#atlarewatch#avatar the last airbender#atla#azula#princess azula#zuko#prince zuko#mai#ty lee#gifs#avatarthelastairbenderedit#atlaedit#azulaedit#useramys12#tusersimone#userthing#smallscreensource#will not hear anything about 'ursa wasn't a bad mom to azula she just didn't enable her' cause that's not fucking true#i'm not saying ursa should've let azula get away with the bad stuff she did or that her intentions weren't good (which we literally have no#way of knowing ursa is barely a character) but if your child EVER feels like this you have FAILED as a parent sorry not sorry#she said out loud when she clearly knew azula could hear 'what is wrong with that child' DUDE WHAT IS WRONG WITH *YOU*???????#you gotta balance out reprimand with actual affection otherwise the child will not take in the message you're trying to teach them they'll#just think you hate them#AND SHE DID THAT RIGHT WITH ZUKO WHEN HE IMITATED AZULA AND THREW BREAD AT THE TURTLEDUCKS! she scolded him then showed him affection after#on another note!#i think the pause azula takes after saying she doesn't care is super interesting! cause it's VERY similar to the 1x20 zuko moment i#giffed when he's talking about how ozai favoured azula!!! i might make a separate parallel gifset just for that#GOD these siblings make me insane
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mods r asleep post humanized 4x
finished catching up on tpot it was peakkkkkk but i am so scared of one. also working on little clay and felt dolls of 4 x and 2
#bfb#battle for bfdi#tpot#4x#bfb 4x#bfb fourx#four bfb#4 bfb#bfb 4#bfb four#guys do u put bfb before or after the character#x bfb#bfb x#four tpot#4 tpot#x tpot#four in tpot12 saying “nope .... see ya” was so high pitched and quiet WHAT was going on with him. the eye was so funny tho giggled#x with freckles bc of his interest in gardening. 4 with blue patches bc he was the desert and i want to note that#i love the designs i made for them theyre so cute 2 me#4s hair is so hard to draw tho. i cant make it look right#wait ive literally been thinking so much about character comparisons i have to mention it#4 is so obviously alien. he acts so super odd and he appears so unnerving. i feel like he always has wider eyes/smaller pupils#hes always so STARING at things. he is so obviously alien (bc he literally is in this world i think)#2 is also an alien. its in his name AlgebrALIEN. but he is so much more human im obsessed with him#like he laughs so much more he has much closer friendships with the contestants he even makes huge efforts to assist in fixing interpersona#problems and stuff. he is so kind and compassionate and can be super comforting. he is so incredibly human despite being an alien#THTA IS SOOO INTERESITNG AND FUN 2 ME !!!!!!!!!! 4 has loved bfdi and the idea of hosting for years and his goal is to Host but 2s is more#in line with making a point he is what he is bc he wants to be like that. hes a host bc he decided to be not bc someone else told him to#also the recent robot flower arc and the parallels im drawing between her and bot (iii).#bots “i will never be who you want me to be/who you built me as” vs robo flowers “i have to be who you want me to be/who you built me as”
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I have endured what no one on earth has ever done before
I put my lips to the hands of the man who killed my son
#deltarune#gaster#deltarune player#i love still headcanoning gaster as sans and papyrus's dad despite knowing that he saw everything that happened in undertale (including#the no mercy route) and seeing how friendly he is with us in deltarune#you would think he'd hate us and want do nothing to do with us or to hurt us but. he wants to create a new future with us.#he thinks that our search for him is a wonderful thing. he thinks we created a wonderful form. hes thankful for our time.#knowing this while still believing he's the father of characters we've killed makes him such an interesting character#we know he's tied to undertale so regardless of if he's actually their dad or not we have hurt people he knows#and he still treats us with so much care#i love this guy. i wanna know him already#this was fully inspired by a gorgeous drawing by WolfyTheWitch on twitter#of. actual priam jskdjdk#this was drawn using my poor poor pilot pens during classes over three days. i need to buy new ones now lol#i need to use this technique more often#its super time consuming but it looks so cool. and the paper has such an interesting texture now :]]]#i also LOVE drawing gasters hands all melting and barely even like hands#and brown paper packages tied up with string#my art#*i edited this a bit in digital i forgot to mention that gdjdjfk
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Helki compilation
Helki is a prisoner-turned-servant. He’s a criminal canary and was implicitly one of Milsiril’s charges, and now that she’s retired he’s become her servant.
He must have gotten into Milsiril’s good graces, wether through attachment or convenience, which is a feat considering Milsiril’s a socially anxious recluse. Interesting since it’s not like he seems like the agreeable type, shifty upbeat delinquent style… We really don’t know much about him, not even what crimes he did, so there’s a lot of space for speculation on all grounds.
Edit: Shanghai QnA with Kui gave us a new juicy morsel of info!
Interesting… The original answer in japanese is: パッタドルと��じような杖を使っていました。今も同じものを支給されているのですが、すぐになくすのでもはや携帯していないようです。 That it’s written in japanese seems to say that there isn’t the same double translation issue there was last QnA, so if someone wants to look at the original phrasing and word choices it can be done. Perhaps Helki-Milsiril has a more protégé dynamic undertone than previously thought… "For various reasons", meaning circumstances that made it so the squad had to choose between saving him and saving their own skin, or like, "man this guy’s personality sucks we don’t really like him"? Likely to be a mix of several things, since ‘for various reasons’ implies the situation was either complex or they had multiple reasonings. In either case, the phrasing is very much that Milsiril couldn’t abandon him herself, and so a relationship sprung out of that. Another instance of outcasts seeking out and sticking with other outcasts in Dungeon Meshi. This could mean that it’s a bit less out of personal attachment and more out of a sense of duty on Milsiril’s side as well though.
Still edit: So then maybe him staying with Rin in that comic isn’t that much because of work ethics or that he cares for kids (or maybe he does because he feels kinship to them, alone and mistreated), but because he didn’t want to join the other canaries in that room chatting and laughing… Maybe the isolation was exacerbated because he became Milsiril’s favorite, teacher’s pet style, but I’d also be careful about assuming the others disproportionately dislike him, it could be that they just don’t really care for him. Why? Could be because of his personality, because he’s seen as shifty or unreliable or annoying, if an event, who knows who knows, but I like to think because of the Rin comic that he generally just tends to be a loner, that he’s "weird" in a neurodivergent vibe, he doesn’t conform to proper social behavior which in elven society seems especially alienating. He’s the only one with Rin to think of her sake, not only worth observing/caring for but also asks her to eat, but he does this with an offputting stare, not really emoting, and then well, the infamous alone with her staring munching covered in blood panel. He stands out. I’m a fan of the theory that it was a "Helki? Not that I dislike the guy but I’m not risking my skin for him" situation… Ok end edit back to older observations.
He seemed to be acting out of his own initiative in the Rin comic, he doesn’t look thrilled to be there in many post-canary comics but he also seems content enough. He restrains Milsiril in the Mithrun cleaning comic which is interesting to think of for their relationship.
It’s fun to notice how he’s the only one that didn’t get bored of looking after Rin, and then reports back about her condition… I’d say he was getting used to taking care of kids which would come with the job of serving Milsiril, but then, not enough for him to clean the blood off himself hah. In this way it’s interesting to think about his relationship to the idea of parenthood, he’s probably the closest thing to a father figure/male role model Kabru had growing up, without mentioning the other kids. I feel like he’d consider himself an older brother, cousin or uncle figure sooo much sooner than a father, but even then I do think it’s just his job and he’s not really invested or forming real relationships with any of them much.
It’s curious to note that he’s dressed in canary uniform presumably after having been pardoned and living with Milsiril? Which you can tell by the armor bits (the yellow strips of spider silk). In the Kabru training montage and the Rin comic specifically. It seems very implausible for him to have still been a canary while being a retired Milsiril’s servant and being with her all the time, and the cleaning with Mithrun comic (where he’s not in uniform) happens after Utaya so it could happen after Kabru was taken in but around the time of the Rin comic. So why uniform? It could be one of the best outfits he has, so it’d make sense to wear it around especially if you’re sparring or getting… Blood on you? Could just be because that's how Milsiril wants him to dress. But yeah we don't know when exactly Helki becoming Milsiril’s servant happened. We do see Mithrun’s charge Cithis be tasked with taking care of him, so a charge being given a servant-caretaker role doesn’t seem all that out of the ordinary, sometimes even prior to retiring.
Imo, if he doesn't work for Milsiril he goes back to jail/the canaries/has to try and get a job instead of just tending to her, so Helki is staying with Milsiril because she's the best option for him. He’s her milsiril's personal servant and does mostly dull tasks involved in that. He’s not particularly suited to the role but they’ve gotten used to each other to him so she took him with her, and he does prefer it to canary work so it works out decent for him. I think he’s used to reading her and managing her moods and he’s one of the rare social connection she has.
Under spoiler is stage 2 interpretation stuff, bigger speculation, in a reblog I’ll make soon I’ll go over my thoughts for stage 3 interpretation lol. Helsiril I’m coming for you
Translation of the canary hierachy chart used is by Thatsmimi, here
#Dungeon meshi#spoilers#dungeon meshi manga spoilers#Helki#Compilation#lmk if he’s pictured anywhere else#Helsiril my beloved I need 30 fics of you it shall have 10 metric tons of extrapolation from canon but it shall be tasty indeed#Might do comps/short explanation posts of the other minor canary characters like Misyl and Erique. Ik the Flamela shippers would enjoy#He has less screentime than Dandan. Tragic. Though I guess he’s just not even remotely involved in present canon business so fair enough#Helsiril#In reblog addition I’ll make… soon#I imagine him kinda being like Mickbell personality wise#Did you know soldier-turned-servant like here with the canaries was a thing historically. No really:#https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Batman_(military)#He looks full of mischief… Alas shackles are minimizing the whimsy and he must act responsible and obey#Helki x milsiril#The helki-kabru potential dynamic is super interesting too#I do like to think seeing milsiril & helki growing up hammered “it’s use or be used” into him… Will elaborate in reblog#Helksiril
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the poor little meow meow-ifictation of saionji in this fandom has got to stop i can't take it any more
#he is an interesting character yes and i like him but some of you act like he is eternally and exclusively a victim which is not true#yes he is a victim of akio and of the narrative (like every other character. he is not perticularly special in this regard)#no he is not a victim of the patriarchy (he in fact benefits from it directly at the cost of the girls around him)#no he is not a victim of wakaba (??not sure where this even came from) no he is not a victim of anthy (watch the first episode again maybe)#some of you are at all times 2 steps away from becoming the next misandry in the utena fandom person#“erm the way he is punished by the narrative for failing to live up to the masculine ideal of the prince-#-is basically just as bad as the systemic abuse he participates in putting girls through“#good lord i do not want to hear your takes on any real world feminist issues#m#bad takes#(should probably remember to use that tag. even though this isn't really about anything super specific)#and it's not about any of my mutuals to be clear. you all know how to actually be critical of how much he sucks#AND write good nuanced analysis. shockingly you can do both. actually i don't think one is possible without the other
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I think the key component to my personal reading of post-Delphi Pharma is that he's trying to be a horrible person on purpose. Not "on purpose" in the way that people have free will to exercise their own choices, but in that Pharma's "mad doctor" persona is a performance he puts on to deliberately embrace how much everyone else hates him. Basically, if people already think you're a "bad Autobot" and a horrible doctor who just kills his patients for fun, why try to prove otherwise to people who have already made up their minds about you? Just fully embrace the fact that people see you as an asshole. Don't try to change their minds. Don't plead for their forgiveness or understanding. Just stop caring. If you're going to be remembered as a monster, you might as well be a memorable monster, and eke as much pleasure and hedonism as you can out of it before karma catches up to you and you inevitably crash and burn.
I mean, I guess you could just go the route of "Oh, Pharma was always a fucked up creepy guy and Delphi was just him taking the mask off," but I really don't like that interpretation because, for one, it feels really wrong to take a character like Pharma becoming evil under duress and going, "Oh well clearly he did the things he did because he was evil all along," as if somehow Pharma breaking under blackmail/torture/threat of horrible death was a sign of him having poor moral character. As opposed to, you know, suffering under the very real threat of horrible death for himself and everyone he cares about while being manipulated by a guy who specializes in psychological torture.
The second reason is that it just doesn't make sense to write Pharma as having been evil all along. I mean...
Occam's Razor says that the best argument is the one with the simplest explanation. Doesn't it make way more sense to take Pharma's appearances in flashbacks, his friendship with Ratchet, his stunning medical accomplishments, and the few we see of him speaking kindly/sympathetically (or in the least charitable interpretation, at least professionally) towards his patients and conclude "This guy was just a normal person, if exceptionally talented." Taking all of these flashback appearances at face value and assuming Pharma was being genuine/honest is a way simpler and more logical explanation than trying to argue that Pharma for the past 4 million years was just faking being a good doctor/person. I mean, it's possible within the realm of headcanon, but the fact is Pharma's appearances in the story are so brief that there simply wasn't room in the story for there to be some sort of secret conspiracy/hidden manipulation behind why Pharma acted the way he did in the past.
I just can't help but look at things like Pharma's friendship with Ratchet (himself a good person and usually a fine judge of character) and the fact that even post-Delphi, pretty much every single mention of Pharma comes with some mention of "He was a good doctor for most of his life" or "He was making major headways in research [before he started killing patients]" which implies that even the Autobots themselves see Pharma's villainy as a recent turn in his life compared to how for "most of his life" he "used to be" a good doctor.
And although Pharma doesn't know this, we as the readers (and even other characters like Rung) know about Aequitas technology and the fact that it actually works, so... if Pharma really was an unrepentant murderer, why couldn't he get through the forcefield too? The Aequitas forcefield doesn't require that a person be completely morally pure and free of wrongdoing or else how could Tyrest get through, just that they feel a sense of inner peace and lack feelings of guilt. Pharma has murdered and tortured people by this point, and put on quite a campy and theatrical show of how much he sees it as a fun game, so why then can he not get through?
It circles back to my headcanon at the start of this post that the "mad doctor" persona is just that-- a persona. Delphi/post-Delphi Pharma's laughing madman personality is just so far removed from every flashback we saw of him and everything we can infer based on how other people see/saw him before that, to me, the mad doctor act is (at least in large part, if not fully) a persona that Pharma puts on to put his villainy in the forefront.
To avoid an overly simplistic/ableist take, I don't think Tarn tortured Pharma into turning crazy. To me, it's more like the constant pressure of death by horrific torture, the feeling of martyrdom as Pharma kept secret that he was the only one standing between Delphi and annihilation, the physical isolation of Messatine as well as the emotional separation from Ratchet, being forced to violate his medical oaths (pretty much the only thing Pharma's entire life has been about), etc. All of that combined traumatized Pharma to the point that the only way he could avoid cracking was to just stop caring about all of it. Because at least then, even if he's still murdering patients to save Delphi from a group of sadistic freaks, Pharma doesn't have to feel guilty and sick about doing it. As opposed to the alternatives, which were probably either going off the deep end and killing himself to escape, or confessing to what he did and getting jailed for it.
In that light, Pharma becoming a mad doctor makes sense. It avoids the bad writing tropes of "oh this character who was good his entire life was actually just evil and really good at hiding it" as well as "oh he got tortured and went crazy that's why he's so random and silly and killing people, he's crazy" and instead frames Pharma's evil as something he was forced into, to the point where in order to avoid a full psychological breakdown and keep defending Delphi, he just had to stop caring about the sanctity of life or about what other people might think of him.
Then, of course, the actual Delphi episode happens, and Pharma's own lifelong best friend Ratchet basically spits in his face and sees him as nothing more than a crazy murderer who went rogue from being a good Autobot. Then Pharma gets his hands cut off and left to die on Messatine. At that point, Pharma has not only been mentally/emotionally broken into losing his feelings of compassion, he's received the message loud and clear: He is alone. Everyone hates him. Not even his own best friend likes him any more. No one even cared enough about him to check if he actually died or not. He will only ever be remembered as a doctor who went insane and killed his patients.
So in the light of 1. Having all of your redeeming qualities be squeezed out of you one by one for the sake of survival and 2. Having your reputation and all of your positive relationships be destroyed and 3. People only know/care about you as "that doctor who became evil and killed his patients" rather than the millions of years of good service that came before.
What else is there to do but internalize the fact that you'll forever be seen as a monster and a freak, and embrace it? People already see you as a murderer for that blackmail deal you did, so why not become an actual murderer and just start killing people on a whim? People already see you as an irredeemable monster who puts a stain on the Autobot name, so why beg for their forgiveness when you could just shun them back? You've already become a murderer, a traitor, and a horrible doctor, so what's a few more evil acts added to the pile? It's not like anyone will ever forgive you or love you ever again.
Why care? Why try to hold on to your principles of compassion, kindness, medical ethics, when an entire lifetime of being a good person did nothing to save you from blackmail and then abandonment? Why put yourself through the emotional agony of feeling lonely, guilty, miserable, when you could just... stop caring, and not hurt any more?
#squiggposting#pharma apologism#i'm sure the doylist reason for the writing is just that pharma was a designated villain#so since he's a villain and 'crazy' it's fine for everyone even the good guys to treat him like complete trash#i just think from a watsonian perspective taking a sympathetic approach is way more interesting and logically consistent#what i mean is like. from a meta perspective one of the best ways to show that a character is super evil and not worth saving#is when even the good guy heroes. the ones who are supposed to be kind and compassionate and wise. see him as dirt#and this is also kind of a necessity in most plots bc TF is the kind of series that just needs action villains and long-term antagonists#so not every villain is written or has a plot to be made redeemable. and pharma is one of these bc he's not important or a legacy character#so from a doylist (meta) perspective you could read the autobots' disregard of pharma as a sign of#'this guy is not meant to have your sympathy as a reader. pay no attention to him'#but from a watsonian (in universe) perspective it paints a miserable picture of pharma being utterly forsaken by the ppl he served alongsid#and like yeah i'm super autistic about pharma so of course i view him with sympathy but like#the idea of being a loyal and good person for years only to be subjected to a Torment Nexus of#being blackmailed into breaking all of the oaths you held sacred. under threat of you and all your comrades dying horrible torturous deaths#then when your comrades find out about it they focus solely on the 'harvesting organs' and not on the 'blackmail' part#and then you get literally left for dead by your comrades and best friend hating your guts#and then you get rescued by a guy who uses you as a test subject for his evil machine#this is a fucking nightmare scenario like pharma could hardly be suffering more if the author TRIED to make him suffer#and for me it's like. the evil pharma did can't be decontextualized to what drove him to that. as well as the question of like#how easily ppl can write someone off as evil and turn a blind eye to (or even find satisfaction in) their suffering bc theyre evil#and either brought it on themselves or it's just karma paying a visit#like. i feel like if pharma WERE a shitty doctor and a terrible person his whole life then the delphi situation would feel like karma#but the way it's written and the lore retroactively put in makes it feel more pharma getting thrown in a torture carousel#and THEN becoming evil. but then being treated as if he was always evil or was some sort of bad apple#bc like i'm not opposed to LOLing when a villain gets a karmic torture/death related to the wrongs they committed#but in pharma's case it feels less like karma and more like endless torture + being abandoned by ppl who should have been more loyal
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I drew Ted from the wonderful @nabwastaken ‘s Time Bastard Au! The original design is by the talented @midnightnautilus , and was so very fun to draw!
#it’s a very fun au#I enjoy it quite a bit#I mean it’s hard to go wrong when making hatchetfield characters superheroes#although nobody should ever give Ted super powers#my man would wreak so much havoc#he's just a silly guy tho#I loved drawing him in this costume#drawing horns is so much fun#and I got to do a little comic book type halftone moment that I don’t get to do in a lot of my drawings#I love the halftone effect so much so when I find a drawing I can use it with I get very excited#anyways yall should go check out the au#Midnightnautilus has got some awesome art for it and the concept is so very good#let’s see what’s a fun fact for this one#fun fact: the person who created the early version of the Polygraph (lie detector) test also came up with Wonder Woman!#It's really interesting especially when you remember that Wonder Woman has the lasso of truth#Ted spankoffski#hatchetfield#time bastard#time bastard au#hatchetverse#team starkid#starkid#hatchetfield au#tinky#tnoy karaxis#the guy who didnt like musicals#nightmare time#my art#others idea
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