#like her story was that she was happy but only felt like she had to be a man because her parents felt guilty

[fashionteahouse]

out of your league - paul x reader

AN: Thanks so much for the love for the 1st part of this story 💜 Should I make this full blown story? Just lmk! xoxo

“Mm. I don’t like the word bye. Tell me you’ll see me again.”

You look at him, surprised that he wants to see you again. Clearly, he enjoyed your company.

“Okay. I’ll see you later.” you speak out.

He watched you go up your stairs and go into your house before pulling off. You felt so in a daze, you didn’t know why you felt this way. You replayed the day in your head when you showered.

You replayed it when you were trying to count sheep to go to sleep.

While you were getting ready for school, you had the realization that you were going to see him again. You made your way to the front of your house and opened your front door and Paul’s car startled you. It was so unexpected, you didn’t even have time to pump yourself up.

You walked closer and in front of the passenger side door and you wait for him to roll down the window, which he does.

“Get in.” he says like this like it was a frequent thing that you two do.

You take your time to get in, questions swirl your mind.

“Good morning. Thanks.” you tell him.

He nods in acknowledgment.

“So…you decided to come to school?” you ask, the silence after was deafening but come on, he came to school like it was an occasion.

“Yeah.” he just says and you just shift your backpack that’s between your legs into a more comfortable position. You choose to look outside and watch the trees and street signs fleet pass.

You loved these types of mornings. It was a slight drizzle but it was so relaxing.

“You look nice.” he said with a sentence and you look over, he was actually looking down at your outfit.

“Oh, thank you.” you say, your heart start to race.

You mentally face palm yourself for being so nervous and flattered. “He is only driving you to school.” you kept telling yourself. “He’s only doing a nice gesture.” you said in your head. You didn’t want to get your hopes up and assume things that weren’t like that.

It was ingrained in you to compliment someone back if they compliment you. You look over to see what he has on. Everything was nice. His entire outfit matched with crisp shoes, new shoes that you knew for a fact that recently came out.

“I like your outfit too.” you say and he grins, “Thank you.” He replies in a sultry tone.

You swallow hard. Everything he does is with ease. Cool without even trying.

The school building comes into view. You already take your seatbelt off and say your thanks. Before he could reply you pick up your pace in going into the building. You show your school ID, going in through bag checks, and going straight to your locker.

You get ready for your first class and only bring out what you need before putting your bag and jacket in there. You close your locker door and Paul was there.

“Oh shit!” you say under you breath with a chuckle, he came out of nowhere.

“Before you rolled out, I wanted to know if you did this.” He says to you and an over-folded homework sheet is in display of his hands. “Yeah, I did it. I can teach you, you know so you don’t have to keep copying. What happens when the test comes?” you say.

He glances at it and then back to you. “It’s boring.”

You were about to speak out but your best friend, Kim comes into view, giving you a hug. This makes you smile and chuckle, happy to see her.

You just reach for Paul’s worksheet, knowing he won’t have time to copy it all since the first bell was about to ring. “I’ll just do it.” you tell him and he plainly gives it to you and walks away.

Kim links her arm with hers and once you two start walking, she hounds you. “Why are you doing his homework? Can’t he do it himself?”

“He needed help. There’s no time.” you tell her.

She shakes her head and tells you ,”Be careful. He’s just going to use you just to pass. Who knows if he’s even going to pass this year.”

Your feelings were hurt even though she wasn’t talking about you. It felt like she was though. He wasn’t even all that bad from what you’ve been around. He just wasn’t strong in that particular subject, that was okay, school wasn’t for everyone.

You did complete the worksheet. You wrote it sloppier than your own handwriting, not knowing how he even writes. Plus, the teacher seemed to know everyone’s handwriting.

You two had the same lunch before history. You, Kim, and a couple of other friends put your book bags in the seats you all were claiming before heading to the lunch line. You seen Paul come down a stairwell and you make your way towards him. The paper you hand him was refolded and he stops to look at it.

“I did it. Just changed the answers around a bit.” you remind him. He nods as he remembers and chuck it in his back pocket. You were about to walk away until he says, “You eating lunch?”

You nod and he nods too and follows you. Kim and others were a bit ahead of you in line so you cross your arms and lean against the wall, waiting for your turn to pick out what you want.

Paul’s friends are now behind him, starting up conversation. As the line moves, you feel the fabric of his clothes on you, you pay it no mind.

Once you have your food, pay extra for a snack and juice instead of the milk they offer, you make your way to your table.

“Where you going?” Paul asks.

“To..my table.” you say.

“You don’t want to sit with me?” he asks, it caught you off guard how he was actually perplexed that you weren’t following him and his crew.

You shrug, not knowing what to say, and when you sit down, he slowly sits down at another table just watching you. The look on his face had a look of gloom, not even paying attention to his own conversation.

You try your best to keep your mind on the conversation that your peers were having in front of you. You kept in mind what Kim said. You didn’t want to be used in any way.

You made your way to history and the class dragged on. Paul came in late, lazily puts his homework in the homework bin, sits in his seat in the back of the classroom and goes to sleep. The teacher doesn’t even bother to bring attention to it, they didn’t feel like arguing with him and wanted to get through the lesson.

As the class was filing out, he was still sleep. Nobody wanted to wake him up out of fear. You walk over, shake his warm arm, not too hard to startle him. His bloodshot eyes meet yours. “Class is over.” you tell him.

He looks around, stretch a bit and scrunch his eyes. He gets up and you just make your way to your next class.

When the day was over, you went to retrieve your jacket, the rain from earlier being heavy now. You’re almost down the hallway, “Y/N!” you turn around. Paul dangles his car keys. “You want a ride?”

You definitely did not want to walk in the rain or get on the rowdy bus. You nod and thank him. You two walk in stride and you poke fun of him for sleeping. “I just couldn’t do it. I told you it’s boring.” he simply replies.

Seated in his car, his scent being all over the car, you put your seatbelt on. He yawns and asks, “Do you want to come back over?”

You had no plans on having afterschool plans, the teachers had no mercy and homework was piled up today. “I got homework. I have to tackle it before I feel like I won’t feel like it.” you reply.

“Cool. We can do it together. Plus you said you were going to help me.”

“I said I can help you. Not that I would.”

“Same thing.”

That’s how you two were sprawled on Paul’s bed, that he didn’t bother to make up. He even changed into his house clothes, which wasn’t much since it was loose basketball shorts and no shirt. You tried to not stare too much. Just peeked glances when he would turn away. You were only there to teach him some strategies that helped you understand the hardness of your work.

But it seemed impossible, he kept distracting you. Once you went to explain how to get a certain answer, he would rub his finger softly back and forth on the back of your resting hand. That would give you butterflies and it would make you retract your hand, due to nervousness. He found this amusing. It was as if he knew the effect he had on you.

“I want to take a break.” he decided.

“We barely put a dent in.” you say.

He sighs softly and looks around his room. “Want to play cards?”

“I don’t want to play go fish.” you say with a hint of annoyance.

He nudges you, “Come on i’m not playing that.”

You two shared a game of spades. As the game was still fresh, you two organizing your cards from highest to lowest rank, he makes a deal. “If you win, we can go back to our work.”

“Good.” you say and look at your cards.

“If I win…” he starts to say and waits for you to look up. He had a mischievous look on his face that makes you roll your eyes.

“What? If you win, what?” you ask.

“If I win…you have to…kiss me.” he says with an anticipation effect.

You shake your head and scoff. You knew if you two kissed, things will never be the same. That’s all you would have on your mind. You wouldn’t even look at him the same. Plus, this guy seemed to know the game better than you. He did have to teach you the rules after all.

“I’m not doing that.” you playfully say.

He nods his head to solidify that’s exactly what’s going to happen and hums a response. You zero in on the game you two were playing. You wanted to save yourself the trouble, so you were determined to win. It didn’t seem to matter, everything so far was working in his favor. He won trick after trick. You only won one. After scoring, he did in fact win.

You groan while he laughs in satisfaction. Scooping the cards up and puts them back where they belong. You lamely announce you have to go to the bathroom, standing up and make your way towards his bedroom door.

“Uh uh.” he says to you, clearly seeing through your excuse. “I won. So, where my prize?”

“It wasn’t a fair win. Before this game, I didn’t even know how to play.” you say.

“A deals a deal.” He says.

You stand there for a sec, too stunned, because since he did in fact win, you had to carry out the deal.

“What are you waiting for. Let’s get it over with.” you tell him when he doesn’t move. He gets up and is now very close in front of you, nervousness is seeping through your entire body. You’ve never been this close to him before, especially face to face. He hurt so much to look at him because he just had a face that anybody would go crazy for.

“I said you have to kiss me. So i’m ready when you are.” he says lowly and looks at your lips.

You would’ve never thought in a million years that you would be in Paul Lahore’s room, about to kiss Paul Lahote. You suck in a shaky breath and quickly lean forward and press your lips to his. He’s not satisfied and his face doesn’t hide it.

“That was not a kiss.”

“Yes it was.” you tell him.

“No. I want a real kiss.” he says and there’s no signs of him giving up. He knows you’re stalling, so he curl his finger in a ‘come here’ motion to hurry you up.

You slowly inch and inch and you just lay your lips to his. He then takes the lead because he doesn’t know when’s the next time this will ever happen. He wants to make the most of this. Head titled, he licks your bottom lip to get an entry and caressed his tongue with your own. His hand creeps behind your neck and you had no choice but to move forward close up on him.

The butterflies weren’t in your stomach this time, it was in your womanhood and you felt excited, even though this wasn’t your plan. He lets you go with a sensual snack and you’re breathing heavy. His eyes were low with swollen lips and it made you want to kiss him again.

You don’t even know what to say, so you two look at each other for a minute. You turn to sit down on his bed and look at the floor. You felt the bed dip beside you and glance over and he’s still looking at you, searching your face for something.

He opens his mouth to say something but a door closing catches both of your attention. He goes out to greet his father, who just came home from work. While he’s gone for that duration, you feel your bottom lip with your tongue and realize you can still taste him. You just simply can’t believe that just happened.

You get your school work in order and focus back into the academic mission that was originally supposed to transpire. You don’t even know if you can focus again.

“That was my dad.” he tells you.

You nod your head in acknowledgment.

“Can we…finish up?” you ask timidly.

He sits now and actually lets you take the lead in showing him how to solve the problems. There was a sense of tension but you pushed past it to finish. When you two are finished, it’s nighttime and you know you have to head home soon.

“Alright, hopefully you got the hang of it.” you say as you’re stuffing your belongings back into your backpack.

“I need your number in case I need your help again.” he boldly says. Your hands start to get shaky again. You didn’t know whether or not you wanted this to be a frequent thing. Your thoughts stop when he extends his phone for you to enter your number. You take it hesitantly and enter it and give it back to him.

You two make your way downstairs and Paul’s dad is sitting in his designated chair watching whatever is on the television.

You two greet each other and he just puts an arm around your shoulder to steer you out. You surprisingly like this gesture and you wish it could be like this forever. You two get settled in a car and before silence takes over he speaks.

“I want to take you out.”

“Oh..where?”

He chuckles as if it were an inside joke, “I mean.. How should I say this?” he thinks for a moment. The ticking of the turning signal fills the air. “I want to always do what we did. I like it. And I like you.”

You don’t trust your voice, you don’t even know what to say, so you just nod.

Your house comes into view and he says, “I’ll pick you up tomorrow morning okay?”

“Okay. Thanks again.” You opened the door and before you lift yourself out of the seat, you turn to him and say, “I think…I like you too.” you say.

He gives you a smile that lets you know he is satisfied with your answer.

As you lie in bed, you were right. That’s all you kept thinking about. It got to the point where the night felt like it was dragging on. All you wanted to do was sleep it off but it seemed impossible. Every time you closed your eyes it seemed like you were reliving it over and over again. Your mind started to travel to different directions, thinking of what would happen if you two kept going and didn’t stop. All of the tossing and turning made your pillow warm and flipped it over to retry sleep.

The next day, you were a bit tired from getting only 4 hours of sleep. You tried not to think too much of your outfit, even though you couldn’t get out of your head of how he told you when you looked nice.

You said goodbye to the remaining people in your household who haven’t left yet and made your way outside. He was there as promised, with the engine running. You get in and tell him good morning.

He greets you back but more importantly he leans over and kisses your cheek softly with so much affection it almost seemed out of place for his hard exterior. Your face feels hot and a small grin creeps your lips.

You two make small talk and then you start to yawn.

“Tired?” he asks.

“Yeah.” you couldn’t wait for the day to already be over so you can jump in your bed and take a nap.

“Up thinking about me?” he asks cockily.

You roll your eyes playfully and don’t say anything. He just snickers at your reaction.

He pulls into the school lot and you already have your seatbelt unbuckled, he places a warm hand above your chest to hold you in place for a second.

“Not so fast.” he teases. You look at him in confusion and he makes it his duty to kiss you again. It was unexpected and it wasn’t a quick peck. He held your chin with his index finger and thumb.

After he pulls away, with you trying to catch your breath, he walks over to your side on the car door and lets you out. You walk in stride with him and he has an arm resting around you, pulling you close. People look of course but with him, it doesn’t feel embarrassing.

He walks you to your locker and patiently waits for you to put your belongings in there. He never brought a backpack. You don’t know how he survived this long doing such thing.

Kim comes into view but slowly decrease her speed in walking when she sees who’s with you.

“Hey Y/N.” she says to you awkwardly.

You say hi to her as if it was the most normal day.

“I’ll meet you in class.” she simply says and makes her way.

Paul walks you to where you needed to go.

Whenever you’re out of class, he’s right there. He holds onto you as if you’re going to run away if he lets go. You’re so absorbed in his company that you don’t even meet up with Kim and your other friends. You get your lunch together. He steers you to his table, not trying to repeat the same thing that happened the previous day.

Kim looks at you with a ‘what are you doing’ expression look on her face. You give her an apologetic look and Paul sit you down super close next to him. His friends sense the new company but they don’t say anything out of line because Paul is giving them all a look that could kill. He keeps one hand placed on the outer side of your thigh.

He softly makes conversation with you. Each vibrational wave of his voice raising hairs on the back of your neck, suddenly paying attention how attractive his voice is.

In history class, he’s sleep as always.

The day is over and he doesn’t even have to tell you that he’s driving you home. As the school is out of view, he’s not driving in the direction of your home.

“I’m tired, I want to take a nap.” you tell him, completely wiped from the school day. Mentally cursing yourself for not getting enough sleep.

“You can sleep with me.” he says.

You’re nervous again. Walking with him through his house and you sit on his bed while he changes out of his school clothes.

When he comes back in the room, he pulls his covers back and it looks enticing, looking like you’ll get the best sleep of your life from it.

“Come on. I thought you were tired.” he says impatiently.

You take off your jacket and place it in the chair that it’s in room and lay on your side. He lays down after you and pulls you to him and kisses you once more. When he’s done, you turn to get some sleep and buries his face in the back of your neck and you two drift happily into slumber.

[valerie-is-in-the-cupboard]

Hi, I have a request. I was hoping if you can do a one-shot or short story of Alastor x reader with telekinetic powers that's similar to Carrie White? It can be romantic or platonic, which ever fits better is up to you.

It can go something like this; the reader fell into hell because they did something really bad with their newborn powers, and it was during extermination day. When the exorcist angels were going to kill the reader, they use their TK powers to defend themselves against the angels and manage to kill one before getting away from them. This was caught on news and immediately caught the attention of all the sinners in hell to see the reader has telekinetic powers and manages to fight off the angels. This even caught the attention of all the overlords, including the three Vee's, the Hazbin Hotel crew and Alastor.

That was honestly all I got 😅, I'm sorry if it sounds confusing, but I was hoping you can do something like that, if that's OK with you, because your work is very amazing to read.

Welcome to Hell! - Alastor x reader

Helloo!! I’ve decided to keep this as a one-shot for now since I want to focus on finishing my ongoing stories. However, if inspiration strikes, I might dive deeper into this idea in the future! In the meantime, it was a wonderful request, and I hope you enjoy it! ❤️ A/N: I was supposed to post this tomorrow but I accidentaly clicked post instead of schedule so... here you have it. Warning: Not proofread!

Words: ~2300 TW: none.

Your hands were shaking.

What had you done?

Your heart was racing, your breathing erratic.

You’ve killed someone again.

You only wanted to protect yourself… you always had!

You're a monster.

The golden blood splattered all over you, all over the ground, awakening memories. It happened so fast, so quickly that you still believed it was all a dream. They attacked you, didn't they? It wasn't your fault. You just wanted to survive. Doesn't everyone?

What was this place? Why is everyone so panicked? Why are these beings attacking you?

The sound of a bell rang across the strange city you woke up in, the weird beings flying in the sky. The streets echoed in screams and cries, grunts of pain and suffering sending shivers down your spine.

Once the panic subsided, creatures surrounded you, whispering and watching with wide eyes.

"You... You killed an exorcist?" one of them asked.

"What?" you couldn't understand. What was happening? Was this a joke?

"We're gonna die!" another screamed.

"What? No, I-" You tried to protect yourself, but fear overwhelmed you. You noticed them approaching you, your eyes falling on a nearby wrecked car.

A loud noise echoed as the car blasted through the crowd, giving you a chance to escape. Corpses of these things surrounded you, and blood splattered all over the streets. What was this place? What happened here?

You felt threatened, like prey running from unknown hunters in unfamiliar territory. What was happening? Were you dreaming?

Am I dead?

"Welcome back to 666 News, the premiere station for all things Hell! I'm Katie Killjoy with today's top stories!" Katie's voice echoed through the TV in the hotel's lobby, mere moments after Extermination Day was over.

"Extermination day has just ended, and as usual, demon parts and blood litter the streets of Hell, as clean-up crews get to work."

Charlie watched the news, Vaggie's hand slowly caressing her shoulder. "You want me to change it?" she asked her.

"No... I need to know the damage..." Charlie said, sighing, clearly distressed about her people getting killed once again. Vaggie hugged her tightly, knowing how painful it must be. She'd erase that smile on Katie's face if she could - always so happy to announce the death of other Sinners every year.

"But the news doesn't end there! As it turns out, a newcomer has been reported for recently killing an Angel - using telekinesis, no less!"

They both watched with wide eyes, as Husker joined, his curiosity getting the best of him too. The images of you blasting a car through the car appeared on the screen, screams of people echoing through it.

"Holy shit!" Vaggie said, not quite believing what she was seeing. "They must be confused."

"And what a hell of a start..." Husker said, not phased by the events.

The doors of the hotel burst open, Angel frantically looked around as he tried to catch his breath. "We... We need- Oh, shit..." he tried to say, but running as fast as he could all the way there surely took a toll on him.

"Angel, what happened?" Charlie asked.

He took a deep breath, trying to let the words come out. "We need to take that sinner... I've heard Vox and Valentino talk... They want them!"

"No! If The Vees have them, especially with that power..." Charlie said, worry on her face. It would've been a catastrophe. Having someone like you, powerful and confused controlled by The Vees... It couldn't happen.

A laugh echoed in the room, as everyone's attention shifted. Alastor appeared in the room, shadows emerging everywhere, the smirk on his face wider than usual. He clearly heard what happened, lurking in silence for the perfect time to make his presence known.

"My, my... What an interesting little situation we've managed to find ourselves in! It seems our new arrival has made quite the impression." he said, excitement filling his tone.

"Alastor, you need to help us-" Charlie pleaded, only to be cut off by Vaggie.

"Hold on, Charlie... I don't think Alastor is the best to handle this situation."

"Let me disagree, my dear!" Alastor intervened quickly, stepping closer to them. "I think my skills in... persuasion must be of good help, don't you agree?"

"Manipulation, you mean," Vaggie said harshly, making his eye twitch a bit.

"Ah, that's such a negative word, my dear... I think my term is a little bit more friendly, hmm?" He pushed her aside, wrapping his arm around Charlie's shoulder. "Now my dearest Charlie, let's think about this for a moment, shall we?"

"Charlie, no!"

Charlie fiddled for a moment, thinking about it, but as much as she hated to disagree with Vaggie, Alastor was right... He always managed to convince people to do different things, and right now, having the newcomer come to the hotel was all that mattered. She sighed, turning to face Vaggie. "I think we should let Alastor try..."

A small chuckle escaped Alastor's lips, his smile growing even wider as he heard Charlie's words. "Excellent choice, my dear Charlie! I promise not to disappoint you!" He clasped his hands together, his eyes sparkling happily as he was clearly enjoying this.

"Ugh, fine..." Vaggie groaned. "But if you fuck up"

"No need for threats, my dear! I assure you there's no need for you to worry!" his eyes turned to Angel, a glim of mischief into them. "Now, where do I find this little dearie of ours?"

You walked the halls of the huge building that the demon took you, still shivering from the... unconventional way you were brought there.

"Ah, I truly apologize for my assistant's... way of bringing you here." The TV demon, who presented himself as Vox, said, resting his arm on the small of your back as he guided you from one corridor to another. "I specifically told them that shoving people in that... black van is surely not the best idea." he laughed a bit nervously.

Your heart was beating so fast, a knot in your stomach as you didn't know what to expect. You took a moment to gather your thoughts, confusion still washing over you.

"Am I in Hell?" you asked, things starting to make sense.

"Yes, you're unfortunately in Hell darlin'," he answered, his voice smooth and almost melodic. You weren't surprised to be here, not after what you've done. Not after how many people you've hurt. "But don't worry, you're safe here with me." He chuckled a bit, his clawed hand brushing slightly on your back. "Now, I don't want to pressure you into anything, but I do look forward to finding out more about you. I think we could really help each other."

"I guess..." you said, realising it was better than roaming around this strange city without knowing anything.

Your eyes fell on your reflection whenever you would pass the big windows. You didn't look much different from your human self, but you seemed to resemble a rabbit, rather than anything else. A reminder that you'll always be what you've been your whole life - a prey, something meant to run and hide, in order to survive.

Vox eyed you closely, humming to himself as a smirk slowly formed on his screen. "Looks like you've figured out what you are," he said, his arm still resting on your back. "A rabbit, huh? Cute."

You blushed at his words, trying to hide your face. You felt so cornered right now, so vulnerable to him, not knowing if he was really going to protect you or give you a much worse fate.

"No need to be so shy, doll," he teased lightly, his arm gently tightening his grip around you. "I promise you're safe here. You're under my protection now, after all."

You watched as he unlocked a door, keeping it open for you. You swirled inside, taking in the huge apartment, looking rather luxurious. Vox followed you, shutting the door behind him. The apartment was lavish and spacious, with large windows at the end of the room, and the city lights glowing underneath it.

"Welcome to your new home," he said, his voice slightly echoing through the empty space. "Make yourself comfortable."

"Is this all mine?" you asked, still not believing.

"Yes, darlin', everything in this apartment is yours," he answered, watching as you looked around in wonder. "Consider yourself lucky. Not everyone in Hell gets to have a place like this." He stepped a bit closer, pride lingering inside of him as he watched your reaction. "Velvette will take care of your attire while you're here, so really no need to worry about anything."

You turned to face him, a bit puzzled by this entire situation. "Why are you helping me?"

Vox’s smile widened as he leaned casually against the wall, arms crossed. "I'm a businessman, sweetheart," he said, his tone almost playful. "And I always have an eye out for potential investments. As for you..."

He walked toward you, striding over to you. He slowly trailed a finger along your chin, making you look up at him. "You're something... special. I couldn't let such a precious little thing get lost in this shithole of a city."

Your cheeks burned. You weren't used to being treated with such kindness, a warm feeling settling in your soul. He looked at the watch on his wrist, his eyebrows furrowing in frustration. "Ugh, have a meeting to attend to," he explained, moving away from you. "Settle in and think about my offer!"

"What about Valentino?" you asked, recalling the man you’d encountered upon your arrival, unbeknownst to Vox.

"What about Valentino?" He repeated, chuckling nervously.

"He said he has an offer for me too..."

You watched him sigh, his screen glitching slightly. "Just... don't. Ok?" You nodded, not sure if you should ask more questions or just keep quiet. Vox left, leaving you alone in your thoughts, a lingering sensation of loneliness filling your soul once again.

You walked around a bit, looking at how neat and beautiful everything seemed. You didn't expect to be like this and you surely didn't expect to be met with kindness, not here at least. With small steps, you took in the sight of the city. Was this how you were going to spend eternity? Was this all real?

"Impressive." a voice echoed behind you, making you jump. Your heartbeat quickened as you watched a demon that resembled a deer stand in front of you, his eyes fixed on your figure. "I have to admit, Vox really outdone himself with this one."

"Who are you?" you asked, your voice coming out more weak than you expected. Your ears flattened against your head, as you tried to distance yourself from the stranger, only to be met with the cold glass.

"Quite the frightened little bunny, aren't you?" he teased, a low chuckle echoing in your ears as static accompanied his voice. "My name is Alastor, it's a pleasure to meet you."

You just stood there frightened. In a moment, you made a lamp fly towards him, a frail attempt to protect yourself without making a big mess again. But just mere moments before hitting him, the lamp disappeared into a portal, nowhere to be seen anymore.

He chuckled, taking another step closer, almost towering over you. Alastor watched you from head to toe, clearly evaluating the situation and you. "Very interesting."

"I... Are you Vox's assistant?" you asked, feeling cornered by the deer demon.

He raised an eyebrow at your question, letting out a huff. "Well, of course not, my dear. I am actually here to make an offer." he crouched down to your level, his smile sending shivers down your spine. "You made quite a show for your first day... Those powers of yours..." he seemed almost lost in his thoughts, the possibilities you might offer pleasing him, but first, he had to make you leave Vox. "I know a place where you'll be safe, my dear. And perhaps..." he paused a bit, your ears perking up a bit in curiosity. "... perhaps even leave this place forever..."

Your face lit up for a moment. "Leave... Could I leave Hell?"

"Well, of course!" he said, getting up, his tone cheerful once again. "Is that something that you'd want?" You thought for a moment - you didn't think it was fair for you to end up in Hell... all you did was protect yourself, but... having the chance to go to Heaven? He smiled at your hesitation. "I take that you'd be interested, hmm?" he offered you his hand, helping you get back up.

"But... What about Vox?"

"Oh, don't worry about him. He just wants to use you to his advantage, dear. I can actually help you!" The static in his voice grew slightly when he spoke.

"How can I trust you?" you asked, making him sigh at the question, clearly frustrated by your questions.

"How about a deal, my dear, hm?"

"A deal?"

"Well, yes. I always respect my deals! You come with me and I guarantee you that one day, you will go to Heaven." he raised his hand, green flames engulfing it as you looked at it. "What would it be?"

"The fuck you mean she left?!" Vox asked, slamming the door to the apartment open.

"I told you, Vox! I came in, and she was gone!" Velvette protested. "I told you we can't trust the bitch!"

Vox walked around the apartment, his screen glitching from time to time. He was so angry, it felt like he was about to crash. "Ok, ok.... We can find her..." he tried to calm himself down, but his eyes fell on a little piece of paper on the counter. He quickly grabbed it and as soon as he read it, his screen almost overheated and froze.

"Maybe you should try harder than that, old pal."

"Um... Vox?" Velvette asked, a bit afraid he might have a short circuit again.

"I'm... gonna... kill... that fucker..."

Tags: @ratsematary @littlebluefishtail @xghostnuggsx @vxllys

@ustulia @n0tmentallystable @ohmylovewhereartthou-blog

@alastorthirsty @l3rittany @catticora

[lurkingshan]

Japanese QL Corner

We've suddenly got an abundance of shows with dark themes and adult vibes, with a bit of a mixed bag on their execution. These are available for weekly streaming on Gaga unless otherwise noted.

Smells Like Green Spirit

A fan subber came through and we are now able to watch this show on a slight delay from the airing in Japan. This first episode was great, but be warned that this is not a light watch. This show is less a full blown romance and more of a queer coming of age story with a rather bleak worldview that will likely include a romance subplot. Our story centers on Mishima, a young person who is questioning their gender and just trying to live while being constantly targeted by school bullies. The bullying in this show is graphic and violent and Mishima has already been assaulted and targeted by creeps in the first episode, so take care and ask for content warnings if you need them. I have read the manga so I'm aware of what's in store--if you would like to know what to expect before watching, feel free to ask.

Happy of the End

CWs: Assault, attempted murder, blood, death, forced fellatio/rape (against a main character, graphically depicted more than once), revenge porn, sexual coercion and exploitation, stabbing, suicide attempt, suicide, violence

We have arrived at the end of this story, and it did not quite come together for me. I liked a lot of what it was doing; the relationship between Chihiro and Haoren giving them both a reason to persist despite their general apathy toward survival was compelling, and the actors gave strong performances in some very difficult scenes. I thought the show had a strong sense of style and tone, as well. But for me, it crossed the line into over the top trauma porn one too many times, seeming to revel in making the characters suffer and piling on unnecessary traumas that were depicted quite graphically, making the show deeply unpleasant to watch. And in the end, it suddenly veered into a happy ending that felt like a mismatch for the rest of the story, which was achieved via a time skip and Chihiro and Haoren healing offscreen despite their circumstances only getting worse over the course of the show. @bengiyo laid out why that ending felt like the show pulling its punches, and I agree. I can appreciate a story that has an established bleak worldview telling us about a specific time in these characters' lives where they mattered to each other, but slapping that unearned epilogue on it just makes the whole thing feel like torture porn followed by cheap consolation. It didn't feel honest. I don’t recommend watching this one unless you are pretty comfortable with gratuitous sexual violence.

Love is Like a Poison

We’re zipping along nicely, with this week’s episode mostly focused on the case that Haruto helped Shiba win. That courtroom scene was wild. I’m intrigued by all the advances and the early confession from Haruto, because as we and Shiba well know, the man is a con. What’s his angle, and why does he think romancing Shiba is the way to get it? Whatever he’s after, I think Shiba should give in because look at him!

Chaser Game W 2

This week we met Itsuki’s first love Yoreum, who is now a famous Korean idol and still hung up on her from back when she did a homestay with Itsuki’s family. She did a livestream from Itsuki’s cafe in the special spot where Itsuki and Fuyu like to canoodle; jealousy and dramatics ensued. Then suddenly we were doing an elevator rescue? Idek. I’m rooting for the new girl to break this couple up to be honest.

[acourtofthought]

The book Sarah had displayed "The Once and Future Sex" just triggered something for me after looking over the synopsis:

Enshrined medieval thinkers, almost always male, subscribed to a blend of classical Greek and Roman philosophy and Christian theology for their concepts of the sexes. For the height of female attractiveness, they chose the mythical Helen of Troy, whose imagined pear shape, small breasts, and golden hair served as beauty’s epitome. Casting Eve’s shadow over medieval women, they derided them as oversexed sinners, inherently lustful, insatiable, and weak. And, unless a nun, a woman was to be the embodiment of perfect motherhood.

I always thought it was a bit strange how Sarah continually reminded us of Elain's small breasts but seeing the above makes me wonder if it's because she took inspiration from the likeness of Helen of Troy as a pear shaped, small breasted figure which was the ideal of attractiveness during that time period.

It makes a bit of sense as Helen of Troy's face was one that launched a thousand ships with Elain's being a face that could bring kings to their knees.

The Trojan War began because Paris took Helen from her husband, Menelaus and in SF we have Rhys warning Az that his actions, his lack of concern for her mating bond with Lucien, could lead to a battle to the death and ruin the peace of their lands.

On the one hand, the Paris of Homer's Iliad is depicted as a handsome and charming young man motivated by his love for Helen and his belief that she is destined to be his.

It's debatable whether Paris truly loved Helen or whether he believed he did because her love was promised to him:

Still, Paris could not decide, as all three were ideally beautiful, so the goddesses attempted to bribe him to choose among them. Hera offered ownership of all of Europe and Asia. Athena offered skill in battle, wisdom and the abilities of the greatest warriors. Aphrodite offered the love of the most beautiful woman on Earth: Helen of Sparta. Paris chose Helen and thereby Aphrodite.

"His belief that she is destined to be his." sounds a lot like Az feeling he should have been given Elain because his brothers are with her sisters.

"Some stories say that Aphrodite put a spell on Helen to make her fall in love with Paris, while others say she loved him without the goddess’ help."

Helen regrets her decision to be with Paris, and her resentment of him intensifies as the war progresses. She is disgusted by Paris's cowardly behavior when he fights Menelaus.

If Sarah went with the first story, she could have played into that with Elain's interest in Az where she felt influenced by what she thought her sisters wanted of her (which Rhys all but acknowledges in the Feyre bonus, about her being worried that she'd disappoint them if she acted out of character for what they expected of her). It's clear that Feyre initially had animosity towards Lucien in ACOWAR and it was very evident that Nesta only started coming around to him later in her book so it's not a stretch to believe Elain thought that since her sisters were interested in Rhys and Cassian, she as the third sister should also try to be happy with the third brother so as not to make waves.

Also, Elain is bothered by cruelty and though the circumstances would be different (since I don't imagine Sarah would write Lucien and Az battling it out to the death), I do think that had Elain actually hooked up with Az she would have later regretted it. I think she would have been bothered by Azriel's threats of Lucien, his indifference to killing him and causing issues between courts.

In Homers account, Helen is eventually reunited with her husband Menelaus.

I also think it's interesting how in what is clearly a negative way of thinking, the above book mentions men who considered woman to be the embodiment of "perfect motherhood" and Sarah chose to write Az thinking of how innocent and pure Elain is in his bonus chapter, how he will taint her.

[missmarveledsblog]

It's only pretend right ? ( Bucky barnes x reader) part three

summary : kitty ( y/n) brings bucky to one of the spots in her life she can just breathe and take it all it , while the two enjoy the time alone soon realize that they been gone far too long get back only for bucky to take a tumble and learn more and more about her , he even get asked to bring her grandmother to church and a surprise shows up that makes her happy to be home

warnings : this is actually unlike me to have a tooth rotting fluff piece but i ain't mad at it , grammatical and spelling errors ( whats new)

previous part

Maybe it was the scenery , maybe it was the company  or even it was the both that had her instantly more calm more settled , the fresh green grass  , trees and  fields as she passed by was something she did miss even though the compound was surrounded by some trees and stuff it wasn’t like this . it wasn’t the great outdoor of home she always looked forward to .  The two stopped near the meadow just an hour from her house. She felt calmer being away from the judging gazes and comments, finally being able to breathe fully and it was like bucky could see the shift himself .

 “ You know they have no idea about who you are,” he spoke up.

 “I used to think they did , they used to make me doubt myself so much that when i was on my own I thought I was a disappointment so when i was left in big city i was afraid to come home, until I met fury  , he showed me I was worth something then I came on to the team and even more, I mean my dad's side they're awesome they let me know i'm loved , they tell me all time that their  proud of me” she smiled brightly. 

“ I understand you more” he nodded “ huh ? “ she felt herself suddenly doubt kicking in.

 “ Why you make everyone's day better, let them know their worth even when they don't themselves “ he smiled softly watching the horse move to the little river.

“ I make sure they never feel the way I once did,  sorry also I didn't know dickface was here” she grumbled . 

“ gotta be a specific doll” he chuckled .

 “ Good one but I was talking about my ex,” she laughed.

 “ He's the one who hurt you badly huh?” He knew of him , Knew it was bad but never pushed her to tell him .

 “ he left me in new york two days after arriving found him with another girl when I went go get my stuff out of hotel room and he didn't care like they waited for me to leave” she scoffed.

“Well  he never deserved you , he  screams of  what is it Parker says , small dick energy “ he mused as her laughter filled the meadow. The way the light hit her honestly looked like an angel,as he knew one week was gonna be hard , two was going to definitely kill him . 

 “You know I'm glad fury found me “ she sighed  flopping on to the ground staring up at the clouds above. 

“ As am I,  you know you still never told me that story either” he flopped down beside her .

 “ you make it  through these days without killing my family or ex and well then I'll tell you both stories “ she giggled .

 “ you got yourself a deal doll “ he held his hand out as she took it, sealing their deal 

 “ so Is this your spot , you know  that one spot that everyone has to feel free , The one that is just for them ” he asked, eyes watching her reaction. 

“ It's one of them only Jessie knows my real spot, the one I went to  as a kid when they would visit or when I had a tough time,  he’s the oldest and in the army  but he got leave so be here tomorrow ” she smiled softly.

“  Are you two  close?” he asked . 

“ He was the first best friend I've ever had and the first person I rang when I got both jobs then my dad” she smiled. 

“ I mean I love izzy and jack to death and we’re close too, we bond over different things , she is closer to  Jack ,twin thing “ she explained . He could listen to her rambles even for hour , days even and not get tired of sound of her voice .

“ I get what you mean doll” he held her hand and two just looked up at sky enjoying the comfortable silence. She even had a nap before the buzzing of her phone startled her seeing the sun setting .

 “ shit mama texting to say it almost time for dinner” she yawn as he stood holding his hand out for her to take pulling her up . “ just us and grandma “ she added .

“ the evil one?”.

“ The devil lady , she ain't so bad I mean she's quiet and grumpy and judges everything most of the time and ignores everyone. My dad convince she sold her soul to the devil to live forever hence the nickname , she’s had a few close calls ” she chuckled easily mounting her horse as bucky got up on the moon easier.

“ I would say race you but this one is too far gone” he chuckled as she walked a head and moon followed.  

“ I'll see if I can keep you guys together” she cooed to the horses . 

The sun completely set as the two pulled back up on the ranch. All the cars were gone meaning they were gone too . 

“ I can't believe this,” her dad stared as they approached.

 “ What are you about, old man?” she laughed.

 “ the rebel stallion walking like a show pony , you know he bucked Jack off” he said coming to the two .

“ he's misunderstood , hard at trusting but once he does , big softy plus jack in the box is annoying  “ she giggled, flickering a glance towards the man beside her.

 “ We think he's after star too “ bucky patted the stallion not realizing he was going to sneeze once horse head went down bucky tumble after hitting the ground with a thump.

“ shit bucky you ok “ she hopped down so quickly honestly her father never seen her move so fast  .

 “ is it dark enough that neither of you saw that” he groaned, eyes not  wanting to open. 

 “ it not even dark enough to hide the red of your cheeks son” her dad's hand slipped into Bucky's, pulling him off the ground.  

 These two stay together  from now on , you get in and rest that was quite a fall I'll check you over once I get these settled “ she called back .

“ come on son we get you in “ her dad led the super soldier in suppressing his laughter.

“ Are you ever gonna tell her how you feel?” he asked. “ I mean we're together “ he panicked.

“ I may be old but I ain't dumb  , plus the team clued me in “ he chuckled . 

“ steve?” He asked .

 “ he and Natasha , they rang three nights ago” , his words making Bucky stop. 

 I only found out last night.” His brows furrowed.

 “ she only found out that morning” he winked, heading into the house leaving the door open once the super soldier let the words sink in.  

“Come on before she kicks both our asses,she a cute little thing but shit never get wrong side of kitty ” he walked faster into the house as bucky followed . 

“ about time … wheres kitty “ her mother turned to see two men .

” Bucky here took tumble off the moon so she gone get them  set for night while I checked over lover boy here” he patted the man's vibranium arm . 

“ shit” bucky huffed. 

“ What's broken , we ain't got insurance for that '' her dad said  his first proper look at the metal arm he's only ever seen in pictures. 

"Nah the plates and calibration is out of whack ,makes it off” he explained lifting the glasses up and instantly smashing it. “ I can feel pressure with it “ he winced as they jumped at the sound of glasses shattering .

 “ hey who’s making a mess in here” she walked in seeing their worried expressions set on bucky . 

 What's wrong, do we need to go to the hospital?” she rushed in front of the man. Eyebrows furrowed as her face laced with worry checking him over. 

“ my arm just acting up” he smiled softly loving the doting attention she was giving him .

 “ Pop, can you get my tools please?” she asked softly .

 “ You need to take the arm off , I can clear the table” her mother rushed over .

 “ No, he doesn’t easily do it while on so he can feel it’s in the right balance” she shook her head . Bucky couldn’t help laughing when her father pushed in the heavy trolley neon purple in color.

 “ nice choice color doll” he winked making her chest flush.

“ Jessie and Jack got them for me” she rolled her eyes . 

“ She and my dad used to fix cars when she was growing up , little tiny thing picked quickly. I mean she was fixing engines to her daddy’s machines at 10” her mother chuckled.

“ Ok, you ready buckaroo?” she asked, opening the trolley. 

 as i’ll ever be” he saluted with his other hand.

Her parents watched as she was lost in her task. It was like watching her as a kid working with her grandfather again. While bucky was lost in her , just the presence of her alone.  “ ok …more or less” she asked as he flexed the metal appendages. 

“ nearly there a little more” .   He loved when she was this close, how he could see every detail of her face, little freckles that littered her cheeks, how he could enjoy the full beauty of the color of her eyes. When the tip of her tongue peaked out when she was fully concentrating on a task.

” ok how's that” she asked.

 “ Perfect thanks doll” he kissed her cheek . 

“ y-y-your welcome , food time” she turned so fast she felt dizzy but she was sure if it was his lips or smell of his cologne , the way she had to force her eyes to stay on task at hand or get lost in his beauty but boy did her knees feel weak. 

 “ kitty dear, could you get me a blanket” her grandmother asked . 

“ Yes grandma, which one ?” she asked softly. 

“ surprise me dear” she let a little smile on face. 

“ She needs to teach me to do that,” her father whispered to bucky. 

“ Mama is always sweet to the grandkids” her mother rolled her eyes.

 “Mr Barnes,  would you bring me to the church tomorrow? '' the elderly woman asked face showing nothing .

“ I can indeed ma’am” he nodded . 

“ Mama, he doesn’t know where it is, '' her mother protested.

 “ They got computers for that , thank you mr. barnes'' she nodded before bowing her head, not waiting any longer saying her own grace and tucking  into her food .  

“your immortal right” her dad Frank teased.  

“ Why, '' Bucky asked.

 “ Don’t mind him '' Beth's eyes rolled, swatting her husband as Y/N walked in with a flowery blanket. 

“ Perfect dear, thank you, '' her grandmother cooed. '' Bucky is taking me to church tomorrow” she added as the woman froze while sitting down. 

“ He doesn’t know where it is , we don't have a car here” she began. 

“ your fathers car and he’ll find the way” she dismissed easily.

 “ good luck, you know what buckaroo it was nice meeting you ” she gave him thumbs up dodging her mother swatting her . 

Once dinner was done and everyone was retired for the night, Bucky found her sitting on the porch looking up at the skies . 

“ i was wondering where you went to , nat is wanting to facetime” he held his phone up . 

“ ok park that ass” she patted the spot beside her. What they weren’t expecting was the team sitting in the living room, even Tony .

“ Hey you two, how did the first day go” nat asked . 

“ he survived the first day with the vultures” she joked.

 “ I went horse riding too,” Bucky beamed.

 “ fell off the horse too” she burst out laughing .

 “ last time i was one was the 40’s” he rolled his eyes but didn’t hide his loving glance at her laughing.

 “ Two weeks guys” she said as they all looked away from the camera. 

“ you haven’t had your vacation yet and neither has the cyborg so yes two weeks pretty girl” sam sassed. 

“ Hey little pyro you haven’t seen my black card have you” tony asked arching his brow.

 “ Remember that hug?” she asked . 

“Little shit , buy anything good even? ” he asked, chuckling.

 “ nah not yet might buy my horse a new saddle you know the luxury brand” she mused playfully.

 “ Her little accent is so cute , you can hear it more,” Wanda cooed.

 “ I dont have one , anyway funny find out you got my parents involved in the ploy” she asked softly. 

“ you both need a break ok so shut up and enjoy it , not much happening here anyways” nat rolled her eyes. 

“ I mean it is good to be home , just can’t wait til the rest of them leave, especially dick face” she huffed. 

“ What is your brother thinking?” Nat crossed her arms.

 “Honestly jack doesn’t think” a gruff voice called, making her head shoot right up.

“ JESSIE” She ran off the steps, almost knocking the man to the ground. 

“ her older brother is here i’ll ring you guys later” bucky hung up before standing up.

 “ Hey kitty, good to see you,” he smiled, holding her tighter to him . 

“You're supposed to be here tomorrow” she sniffled.

 “Hey they best be happy tears” he pulled her into a hug. 

“ very happy tears i missed you so much” she almost climbed into his arms .

 “ sergeant barnes” he saluted while still holding his sister close to him .

 “corporal” he saluted back .

 “ Are you being safe?” she asked, checking him over.

 “ I should be asking you that,” he arched his brow. 

“ I'm safe,” she smiled, wiping the tears from her eyes.

 “Sorry you had to deal with them today” he smiled sadly knowing his own family. 

“ s’okay i mean dad was there” she shrugged. 

“ They give her a hard time?” He looked to bucky.

 “  hey i’m right here i can handle it , how long's the leave for” she asked.

 “ It was a bit harsh,” Bucky smiled sadly.

 “ dickface saying anything? And I got two weeks, funny that ?  ” he asked. 

"No, I mean anytime he did Helen answered, even though she doesn’t like him and I didn't influence your leave ” she giggled. 

“ Jack just thinks her family should be there , her parents are gone so he’s all she has” Jessie rolled his eyes still not liking it hell he almost left his post to get her  in NewYork when he found out. 

“ Come on mama and papa haven’t been in bed long” she pulled the men into the house , she and bucky stood on the landing watching the reunion. She grabbed his arm when she saw her mother crying at the sight of her son making him move his arm lacing his fingers in hers . 

“I'm glad i didn’t miss this” she whispered seeing how happy her parents were.

 “ Me too,” he smiled, eyes locked on her , seeing how happy she was. 

taglist : @vicmc624

[hungermakesmonsters]

Love, Sick Love

Chapter Four

Plot summary : Working at one of the shadier bars in Brooklyn, you have one rule; don’t mess around with the patrons. Most of them are criminals, dangerous. None more so than Billy Russo, but Billy believes that rules are made to be broken. Especially your rule. One lapse in judgement is all it takes for Billy to decide that you’re his, and he’s never been the sort of man to take rejection well.

Pairing : Billy Russo x Reader

Story Rating : R 

Warnings : [This is a fic for 18+ only, minors DNI] Some smutty behaviour . All chapters will deal with dark and smutty themes, including but not limited to stalking. Please check the warnings on each chapter if you choose to follow this story. 

Word Count : 5k

A/N : Reader is messy in this one.

CHAPTER ONE | CHAPTER TWO | CHAPTER THREE

Master List

Chapter Four

You didn’t tell anyone about Billy or what had happened in the cellar, knowing that it was your own fault for breaking your own rule and allowing him into your bed.

It was something that you knew you’d have to deal with on your own. And, you decided to do that in your usual way; by avoiding the problem. By avoiding him.

Sam hadn’t been too happy when you asked to switch to day shifts for a few weeks and Jenna had been downright devastated but you managed to spin them both a lie about how you hadn’t been feeling well, and if you didn’t switch to days, you might have to take some time off sick or potentially find a new job.

For all his bluster, Sam didn’t want you to quit. Mostly because he didn’t want to have to interview for a replacement. 

Days were quieter and the tips were awful, no matter what you did, but you didn’t see Billy and that almost made up for it. 

Most days you found yourself playing on your phone for hours or thumbing through the  newspapers that the day-drinkers left lying around. The headlines were as entertaining as they were depressing; there was a crime spree gripping the city, a gang of masked men robbing check exchanges and stealing from other criminals. It was hard to tell if they were the good guys or the bad guys as, day after day, more of their crimes were reported.

And, then, there was the news that the Punisher might be back in the city.

You’d been around the last time, you’d seen the insanity that Frank Castle had wrought on the city and it was enough to make you think about getting out of New York.

Despite the distance you’d managed to create between yourself and Billy, you still found yourself having strange, paranoid flashes; feeling like someone was watching you, following you. You got a few strange phone calls, on your phone and at the bar. You’d answer and there would be nothing but silence. And, every time you went back to your apartment, it felt like someone else had been there. Things seemed to move and disappear completely - but, then, you’d never been the most organised of people so there was never definitive proof.

You even asked your neighbour if she’d seen anyone lurking, but she reassured you that no one had been near your apartment except you.

Quickly, you came to realise that you were fueling your own paranoia by constantly thinking about him, not allowing yourself to forget that night in your bed or the uncomfortable moment in the cellar. And, when you finally pushed it all to the back of your mind, the paranoia started to subside.

Jenna didn’t seem to be dealing with your separation well. Every night she’d text you, begging you to drop by Sam’s for a drink and every night you refused, despite how much you missed your only friend.

When her night off rolled around, she invited you on a girls night out and you couldn’t bring yourself to say no to her.

She met you outside your building, more dressed up than usual, obviously wanting to make this a very special night.

“Promise me you won’t get angry,” Jenna said, looping her arm through yours and fixing you with a grin that could only spell trouble.

You let out a sigh, already knowing you were going to be, in the very least, annoyed with whatever she had planned. “What did you do?”

“I might have told a few people where we were going tonight,” she said, laughing and pulling you along with her.

“Like who?”

“Just a couple of guys from the bar,” she answered cryptically until you gave a tug on her arm and forced her to stop and look at you. “C’mon it’s just Billy and Jake, and maybe some of their friends.”

“Billy?” You repeated. “You told Billy where we’re going tonight?”

“Oh, don’t be like that,” she answered, rolling her eyes. “I know you’ve got that whole not fucking the customers thing, but he’s a nice guy. He’s been keeping me company while you’ve been on day shift. And, honestly, if you’re not gonna fuck him, I think I might have to have a go.”

You let out a sigh, daring to hope that Billy had moved on to Jenna; she definitely wouldn’t put up with any of his creepy shit and she’d have no problem putting him in line if he tried to cause her any problems, unlike you.

“He’s all yours,” you told her, barely managing to hold back a grimace.

“Seriously, are you not even curious?” Jenna asked, still leading you through the New York streets towards your destination.

“Curious about what?”

“About Billy? About what he’d be like in bed?” She asked and you didn’t answer. “I bet he’s wild - I mean, you can tell just by looking at him that he’s well hung...”

“Jesus, Jenna,” you rolled your eyes, trying not to think about how right she was. “Do you want me to go home so you can be alone with him?”

Jenna laughed, nudging her arm into your side. She was truly incorrigible and you knew from experience that nothing you said or did was going to tame that side of her. Jenna was a free spirit, she loved the thought of love almost as much as she loved the thought of men in general and, normally, you wouldn’t mind, but listening to her talking about Billy like that just caused your stomach to knot uncomfortably. 

She didn’t answer your question, she was too busy laughing at you as she pulled you into The Styx.

Unlike Sam’s, The Styx had a small dance floor and even had a stage for bands, so despite its bad reputation, most nights there got busy and wild. That night there was a DJ playing and, even though it was still early, it was already starting to fill. 

Jenna waved at the bartender, a friend of hers, and one of the few reasons you tolerated drinking there; Mitchell made sure to always serve you and Jenna first, regardless of who else was waiting and he always liked to pour you both doubles.

Mitchell waved back and, before you’d even managed to shrug out of your jacket, there were two shots on the bar in front of you.

Jenna lifted her glass and smiled the sort of smile that spelled trouble each and every time you saw it. But, still, you raised your glass and clinked it against hers before knocking back the shot. The cheap vodka burned as it hit the back of your throat and, already, you could tell that it was going to be a very long night. While Jenna chatted with Mitchell, you let your gaze wander around the bar, looking for familiar faces and hoping that Jake and Billy would not show up. There were a few people you recognised, some guys who drank at Sam’s from time to time and others who you’d met on nights out with Jenna, but there was no one you really knew, no one you’d be comfortable approaching if Jenna decided to ditch you at any point.

Half an hour went by and you quickly lost track of how many shots Mitchell had placed in front of you, every drink and every minute that passed helping you relax a little more. The music soon got livelier and you soon allowed yourself to be dragged onto the dancefloor by Jenna.

You lost yourself to the beat, happily dancing close to your friend, laughing as she turned to grind her ass against you - that was what you loved about Jenna, her ability to have fun and not give a damn what anyone around her thought. You, on the other hand, felt your cheeks warming at the spectacle.

That’s when you felt it, that prickling sensation on the back of your neck that had you looking towards the bar.

And there he was, his gaze already fixed on you.

Jenna soon noticed and, before you could stop her, she had you by the hand and was pulling you towards the bar.

“Hi!” She said, grinning at Billy and Jake, who both offered their own greetings over the sound of the music.

You just stood awkwardly at Jenna’s side, looking anywhere but at Billy.

“Not seen you around in a while,” Jake said, giving you a friendly nudge, forcing your attention back to the group, “thought you might have gone and got another job.”

“No, I just wanted a change from the nightshift,” you told him, finally letting your gaze flit to Billy for a second.

In that second at least a dozen different thoughts and feelings seemed to pass between the two of you. He seemed surprised and confused, and you made it very clear it was because of him, which only seemed to confuse him more. But you didn’t say it. You didn’t say anything to him and he didn’t say anything to you.

“Everyone grab a shot,” Jenna said, breaking through the tension like a wrecking ball.

You let out an audible groan as another drink was forced into your hand - it was green like toilet cleaner and it tasted just as foul. Even Billy and Jake winced as it went down.

Billy took it upon himself to wave Mitchell over and order the next round of drinks, and everyone ended up with a whiskey in their hand. As usual, he pulled out a roll of cash and, for the millionth time since he’d shown up almost three weeks ago, you wondered where he was getting the money, doubting it was from anything legal.

“I see a table,” Jenna said, grabbing you by the wrist and pulling you towards it, the two men trailing after you.

Taking a seat, you settled in, knowing that you’d probably spend the rest of the night at the table now that Jenna had other distractions to keep her occupied.

“So what have you been doin’ with your evenings without us?” Jake asked, seeming a little more amped up than usual. “Hope you’ve not found yourself a man ‘cause I’m still waiting for my shot.”

“Sorry, Jake,” you said apologetically.

While Jake didn’t realise it, he’d given you the perfect opportunity to create a lie, to make Billy think you were off the table and show him, once and for all, that you weren’t interested.

“Wait, what?” Jenna asked. “You met someone? And you were gonna tell me about this when?”

You shrugged. “It’s early days, I didn’t want to jinx it.”

Your eyes flitted to Billy who was staring at you intently, his dark eyes seeming to look right through you, as if he could tell you were lying.

“And what does this new man do?” Billy asked.

You watched a he leaned forward a little, closing the distance between you and making you feel the full weight of his scrutiny 

“He teaches English and poetry at an all boys school,” you answered quickly, reaching for the first lie to come to mind.

Billy didn’t seem convinced, but he didn’t have time to voice his doubts before Jenna was on her feet again, proclaiming that she loved the song that had just started playing and demanding someone danced with her.

You didn’t want to, and Billy stayed silent, leaving it to Jake to agree. And as she dragged him off towards the dance floor, you realised your mistake. 

Sitting back, you waited, expecting him to say something, expecting him to become the man he’d been in the cellar. But he didn’t. He stayed silent, letting his gaze drift after Jake and Jenna, watching his friend light up as Jenna danced a little closer than he was expecting her to.

It gave you a moment to watch him, to study him.

It felt like there was something different about him tonight - or, maybe, there had been something different about him the last time you saw him. Though, actually, when you thought about it, it felt like he was a different person each and every time you saw him.

You saw the way he turned his head when he caught anyone looking his way, the way his shoulder ticked upwards as if he was trying to shrug it off. And you saw the way people were looking at him, the way they’d look and then quickly look away because they didn’t want to be caught staring at the freak.

As angry as you were at Billy, and as uncomfortable as his presence made you feel, you wanted to punch someone. 

There were reasons to mistrust him, reasons to be unsettled by him, but none of those reasons had anything to do with the scars on his face.

You took to glaring at anyone who you caught giving him those kinds of glances, making sure they felt guilty the second they looked away. And it wasn’t long before Billy noticed your silent defence of him. That’s when he chose to speak up.

“Dead Poets Society.”

“What?” You asked, heart stuttering in your chest.

“Do you get all your lies from movies?”

“No,” you answered sharply, “sometimes I use books.”

His lips pulled into a smile, enjoying the moment, enjoying having caught you in yet another lie.

“I’m starting to wonder if anyone knows the real you, kitten,” he said, moving into the empty seat beside you.

“You don’t need to know me, Billy.” 

“You’re wrong. I do. I need to know everything about you.”

You didn’t respond, desperate not to get pulled into whatever game he was trying to play with you. You couldn’t even look at him because every time you saw that smirk on his face, you were reminded of that night in your apartment and the way he’d smirked at you each and every time he’d made you come.

A couple more minutes were allowed to pass in silence before he spoke again.

“What did I do wrong?” He finally dared to ask. “Why are you so pissed at me?”

You could only look at him with a mixture of shock and confusion, not understanding how he didn’t realise why you were so desperate to keep your distance from him.

“I don’t get it,” he continued, “you sure as fuck weren’t complaining when I was in your bed.”

Nervously, you glanced around, not wanting anyone to overhear that you’d slept with Billy. Thankfully, Jenna and Jake were still dancing, and no one else around seemed to care even if they could hear him.

“Seriously? You don’t get it?” You asked and Billy gave you one of his uncomfortable shrugs, reminding you of his scarred shoulder and the way you’d stared at him as he slept next to you. “Following me into the cellar, telling me that I’m ‘yours’ - is any of this ringing any bells?”

There was a flicker of discomfort, a split second where he looked like he might finally understand, and you didn’t expect it from him.

“You wouldn’t talk to me,” he said, trying to justify his actions. “You practically kicked me out of your apartment, then you started acting like I don’t exist.”

“What did you expect? I told you from the start, I don’t sleep with customers.”

“I don’t know, I just didn’t expect... that,” he answered, a hint of frustration slipping into his voice.

You didn’t have a response for him, you didn’t know how best to explain it any more than you already had. You couldn’t tell him why you chose to live that way any more than you could tell him why you often chose to hide behind lies.

“This -” he started and stopped awkwardly, lifting his hand, holding it near his face.

Silence fell again for a few seconds, but a different kind of silence, it was tense and thick with discomfort. His discomfort. There was frustration and confusion on his face, like he couldn’t find the words, almost like he couldn’t even remember the words he wanted to say.

“This thing, it -” then came the anger, not aimed at you but at himself, at his sudden inability to express what he wanted to say.

His hand slammed down on the table in frustration. You flinched, recoiling a little, and Billy noticed.

“If I was gonna hurt you, don’t you think I would’ve done it by now?” He asked, this time turning some of his anger towards you. “I’d never hurt you.”

You stayed silent, your gaze shifting to Jenna, hoping beyond hope that she’d come back to the table. But she was too busy dancing, having attracted two more men to her side.

“I used to be good at this,” he said, his voice softening, his hands slipping into his short hair, holding his head, fingers scratching over concealed scars. “I used to be good at talking to women and -” he left the thought unfinished, but you could fill in the blanks. “But now, because of this I’m...”

The pang of sympathy inside you came unbidden, knotting your stomach with discomfort. You didn’t want to feel sorry for him but you could see how much he was struggling, how much pain he was in.

He’d told you that he couldn’t remember what had happened to him and you’d assumed that he still struggled with the trauma of it, regardless of being able to remember it, and seeing him this way just confirmed it.

“I’m sorry about all that,” you said, forcing yourself to speak, to fill the silence and hopefully put an end to things, “but it was one night, Billy. I told you, I like to keep things separate. The bar is work and out in the real world is the rest of my life...” you shrugged.

In a moment of daring stupidity, you reached for him, placing your hand over his, feeling the tension in his fingers, the way he was pressing them against his own head, as if he was trying to hold himself together.

You didn’t expect Billy to flinch at the contact, for him to pull back as if your touch burned. Then he looked at you, his expression betraying his uncertainty. He shook his head, like he was trying to shake away whatever darkness had suddenly gripped him. Then he reached for his drink, knocking it back.

“I get it,” he said, almost as if the last few minutes hadn’t even happened, like he was suddenly back to his usual self - whoever the fuck that was. “I like to be on my own sometimes too.”

“Who says I’m on my own?” You asked, annoyed, feeling like you were getting whiplash just from talking to him.

“People stop by the bar to see Jenna all the time and she’s always got stories,” he said with a shrug. “Only time I’ve ever heard you mention anything happening outside the bar that wasn’t a lie was when you told her about the physiotherapist who couldn’t get you off.”

How had he managed to read you so easily?

How was it that he managed to see through you where others couldn’t?

“Yeah, well, I don’t like people,” you answered, tone betraying your irritation.

“I’m not people.”

“No, Billy, you’re a pain in the ass.”

“Maybe, but you’re only lying to yourself here,” he said leaning closer. “You don’t have to like me to want me, kitten. And I know  you want me. Eventually, you’re going to realise it too.”

You shook your head. “If you’re looking for someone to fuck tonight, you’ll have better luck with Jenna.”

You didn’t let him answer, you didn’t wait for any sort of response. Without warning, you got to your feet and headed to join Jenna on the dance floor. 

She let out a squeal as you approached her, grabbing you and pulling you close, starting to dance with you. Again, you quickly fell into step with her, losing yourself in the music.

After a few songs, you found someone handing you a drink - one of Jenna’s new friends - and you downed it without hesitation, watching as Jenna did the same.

It continued like that, song after song, you and Jenna dancing together, until she found a guy she wanted to throw her arms around. Normally, that was the point in the evening where you would head to the bar and keep Mitchell company but, every time you dared to look, you saw Billy watching you.

On the dance floor you felt safe, daring to believe that he’d keep his distance. 

And, for a while, he did.

The drinks kept coming and you kept knocking them back, the alcohol settling your discomfort and allowing you to just enjoy yourself. Until one of the guys who’d been bringing you drinks started to get a little handsy. 

He placed a hand on your hip and tried to pull you towards him, unperturbed when you tried to push him back. He stepped in front of you again, both hands on your waist this time, trying to pull your body against his.

You were about to push him away when you saw his eyes widen a fraction, and you felt an arm possessively snake around your waist, pulling you back. He muttered something that sounded like an apology, but not to you, to the man who was now holding you.

“I’m willing to put up with a lot, kitten, but you’re pushing my limits,” Billy muttered in your ear.

A shiver ran down your spine, feeling his lips brush against your earlobe with each word. His hold on you tightened, stopping you from pulling away from him.

“You look so good out here,” he continued, the slightest hint of need in his tone. “Just let me have one dance.”

Part of you didn’t want to, but a much drunker part of you saw it as an opportunity to get some revenge, to show him that he couldn’t have what he wanted. You were going to rile him up, frustrate him, and then deny him. You were going to show him not to mess with you. A plan that, in your intoxicated state, you didn’t think could possibly backfire.

“Fine. One dance,” you conceded.

Without another word, you started to move your hips, your hand covering his on your stomach, enjoying the heat of his touch as it bled through your dress. He held you closer and you felt him start to sway with the music, his chest against your back.

“You’re the only person who makes me feel like I’m not losing my mind,” he muttered against your ear. “You’ve got no idea what you do to me, kitten, how much you make me want.”

The admission left you feeling breathless and more confused than ever, your inebriated mind trying to understand him from all the broken pieces he’d let you see. Regardless of what you thought or how you felt, there was just something about him, something you couldn’t deny. He seemed as lost as you often felt, and you felt a strange connection to him, an understanding that neither of you seemed to want to address.   

His lips pressed to your neck and you leaned in to his touch, pressing back against him as you moved your hips. Billy let out a ragged sigh against your neck and you felt a tell-tale bulge growing in his jeans. You started to grind your ass against him in time with the faster tempo of the music, enjoying that you could have that effect on him. It made you feel powerful, like you were the one in charge for a change.

You knew that you were being stupid, that you were allowing yourself to indulge in something that was going to cause you problems, but you didn’t care. And, despite your initial plan, you quickly realised that you weren’t proving any sort of point to Billy. All you were doing was turning him on.

And getting turned on yourself.

His lips returned to your neck again, teeth scraping over skin and pulling a soft moan from you, and that little slip was all you needed to know that you’d fucked up.

The second the song stopped, you slipped from his hold and started to walk away from him. You’d told him one song and that was what you’d given him. Now, you needed to put as much distance between you as possible.

Slipping into the bathroom, you started to shut the door behind you, only for him to stop you, pushing his way inside. He closed the door and locked it before turning his attention to you.

You didn’t say anything, even though you knew that you should. 

He looked at you for a moment, then he was on you, his hands framing your face as he pulled you into a desperate kiss. And you let him, kissing him back against your better judgement, tasting the whiskey on his lips and tongue. 

It was a bad idea, but part of you couldn’t help but want him.

You wanted him to make you feel the way he had that night in your bed.

More than that, you wanted to be wanted by someone who saw you, someone who could see past the bullshit and lies that you surrounded yourself with. 

But common sense started to wage war on your drunken horniness. Your hands found his chest and pushed him away.

Billy regarded you for a second, his gaze burning through you, causing your cheeks to heat and your thighs to clench.

“Give in to me,” he groaned, lips covering yours again before you had the chance to respond.

Despite what you thought you wanted, you lost yourself in the kiss, trembling in anticipation as you felt his soft hand trailing up your thigh and under your dress leaving goosebumps in its wake. You barely noticed as he lifted you onto the counter.

“I can’t,” you told him breathlessly.

But, again, you didn’t even attempt to pull away when he kissed you, silencing your protests. Your mind said no, but every other fibre of your being was screaming yes.

His leg unceremoniously pressed between yours, parting your thighs so he could step between them, holding them apart and allowing his hand to continue upwards. You felt your cheeks start to burn, knowing what he’d find when those roving fingers reached your panties; you were already wet, your body already anticipating his touch. 

His breath caught the moment his fingers reached wet lace. You felt his lips pull into a smile as he continued to kiss you, stealing your breath.

Billy slipped his fingers into your panties and let out a low, desperate groan, sounding like it had been years and not a few weeks since he’d last touched you. You tried not to make a sound as his fingertips stirred between your folds, easily coating themselves in your arousal. But once you felt a finger slide between your walls, you let out a moan that was just as eager as his actions.

“So wet and ready for me. Admit it, you need this. You need me,” he muttered against your lips before sinking into the kiss again so you couldn’t respond.

You hated that he was right, that he could have such an effect on you, that he could make you want and need in equal measure. But, more than that, you hated how good it felt as that finger started to move, stroking in and out of your body at such a delicious pace.

A second finger joined the first and you felt about ready to lose your mind, climbing higher and higher, already getting close to an earth-shattering orgasm. His lips hungrily swallowed down every moan that tried to escape you and you almost felt yourself surrendering to him.

You wanted to give in to him, to the pleasure you knew he could offer for a few sweet minutes. But Billy had made it clear that he didn't just want a moment, and that every kiss, every touch, and every orgasm bestowed came with the price of his ownership. This wasn’t about your pleasure, it was about him staking a claim on you, and that was something you didn’t want.

“Stop,” you said, finally managing to find your voice and your common sense.

To his credit, Billy stopped immediately, but he didn’t pull away.

“You don’t want me to stop, not when you’re so close,” he told you, his lips ghosting yours.

You took an awkward breath, trying to ignore the way his still fingers felt inside you, trying to ignore the little voice in your head that demanded you let him finish what he’d started.

“Yes, I do,” you answered back, breathless and having to force the words from your lips. “I’m not yours, Billy.”

As he leaned, your breath caught and you froze as his lips met yours again. He kissed you, but only for a second, then he was pulling away, his hand slipping from beneath your dress, leaving you feeling bereft. And you watched as he lifted that hand to his face, slipping his fingers between his lips, giving a hungry groan as he sucked them clean. Your stomach tied itself in knots and you found yourself filled with the realisation that this was far from over, and that Billy wasn’t going to give up so easily.

“You’re wrong, kitten. You are mine,” he said as he turned back towards the door. “Keep working the day shift if you want, but you’re not going to be able to avoid me forever. I'll make sure of it.”

And, then, he was gone, leaving you alone with nothing but your own racing heart.

End Note : I know that reader is all over the place in this one... it will be explained and built upon in later chapters as to why she is the way she is, just like I'm going to be playing more into Billy's injuries as things go on. Anyway, hope you all enjoy this chapter!!

As always your comments/likes/reblogs/asks/general screaming is always cherished and appreciated. I hope you all have an amazing weekend!

Let me know if you'd like to be tagged in future chapters! If tagging doesn't work for some reason (aka Tumblr being dumb) I post most Fridays around 7:30 gmt (and on AO3 at some point in the hours after).

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[imsandra]

Kiss of war 

Pairing: Cassian x Female Reader

Summary: Battles are fought with a sword in hand, and wars of the heart are waged with a kiss.

Warning: Angst, tension. Let me know if anything else needs to be added.

Word Count: 3842

Notes: Here’s something about Cassian, our general. I hope you like it. As always, feel free to leave your comments, suggestions; everything is welcome as long as it's with the intention of teaching and with respect.

English is not my native language, so I apologize for any spelling or grammar issues.

Original story, written by me. Please do not copy or plagiarize my work.

I appreciate any comments, reblogs, and likes I receive.

Happy reading!

Master list

The twilight painted the horizon with purple and red flashes, its reflections dancing on the calm lake that bordered the base of the Illyrians. The cool air caressed her skin, laden with promises of a solitary and cold night, as the shadows of the mountains stretched, embracing the land in a dark cloak. She just wanted some time alone before the shared training with the rest of the Illyrians at dawn.

When Rhysand had informed her that the general would return to Ilyria from a mission that could have cost him his life, she asked him to ensure that everything was well with him and set off on her journey north to the Court. Y/N had been avoiding her mission partner since the last time they were together; she had successfully ignored him for quite some time. The wind blew from the mountains, trying to convince herself that she was only there out of obligation, to fulfill a promise, not because she missed him… or because she wanted to see him.

The sound of Cassian's wings resonated over the mountains, interrupting her moment, his powerful figure descending slowly with a grace that did not fit his imposing physique. He was supposed to return tomorrow at noon, but it seemed he had arrived early.

Y/N stood with her arms crossed, her gaze fixed on him, waiting for him to land on the training platform.

"I thought you would never return," Y/N murmured, her tone neutral, but the slight sparkle in her eyes betrayed the worry she was trying to hide. She tightened her arms across her chest, as if the simple act of maintaining distance would protect her from what she truly felt.

Cassian landed with imposing grace, his wings folding behind him. He approached her slowly, the arrogant smile curving his lips failing to conceal the exhaustion flickering in his eyes—a fatigue that echoed the weight he carried from his last mission. Yet even worn out, he couldn’t stop looking at her, his gaze intense and filled with unspoken questions.

"You know it’s not easy to kill me," he replied.

It was the first time they had exchanged words since that day, and the friction between them had grown. It wasn’t just the tension of a battlefield, but something deeper. The air around them felt thick. Y/N averted her gaze, pretending to observe the mountains, but she only needed a second to steady her breath. She knew the internal battle she was fighting was written in her eyes, and Cassian noticed.

He always did.

"Yes, well, even legends fall eventually," she replied, keeping her gaze fixed on the now-dark sky.

"Were you worried about me, Y/N?" Cassian asked as he took a step closer, his hazel eyes focusing on her.

Cassian's face showed hope, that spark that she might finally acknowledge what she had been trying so hard to hide. He could feel the anxiety coursing through her body every second, what he would give to have pulled her close as soon as he spotted her on the platform, waiting.

Waiting for him.

"No more than I would for any other soldier," she whispered while discreetly observing him.

"Sure. Because I'm just another soldier to you," he said with a laugh, a low, deep chuckle that vibrated in the air. It hurt him that she wouldn’t look at him, that she couldn’t see how much her words pained him, that she couldn’t see the power she had to destroy him if she wanted to.

Cassian always knew what to do to make Y/N lose her composure; he knew how to push her buttons. This time, when she heard his response, she could identify something more in his tone. Something she wasn’t ready to face.

It all started a year ago, on a crucial mission to stop a rebel group planning to attack Velaris. They were both assigned to the mission, and although they had always worked well together, this time was different. In the midst of the battle, as they tried to defend a nearby village, Y/N was gravely injured.

The world seemed to stop the moment he saw her fall, her figure collapsing like a leaf carried by the wind. A roar of fury erupted from deep within him at the sight of blood staining the ground around her. It wasn’t the first time he had seen someone injured in combat, but with Y/N, it was entirely different. Without a second thought, he lunged toward her, ignoring the danger, taking her to the safest place he could find, shielding her with his own body as arrows flew around them. He was willing to put his life on the line for hers.

"You can’t stay here!" Y/N had shouted, barely conscious, trying to stand despite the wound in her side. "You have to fight!"

"Shut up," Cassian had replied, pressing his hand against her wound to stop the bleeding. "I’m not going to let you die here."

Despite the urgency of the battle, something in that moment changed the dynamic between them. Y/N couldn’t stop looking at him while he held her, protecting her with everything he had. The fury in Cassian’s eyes wasn’t just for the fight. It was for her. The way he looked at her, as if she were the most important thing in the world, left her bewildered.

She had spent weeks recovering from her injuries, and Cassian had not left her side, caring for her with a dedication she hadn’t expected. It was during those days that something began to grow between them.

After her recovery, things had become tenser between them. During missions, the lingering glances, the accidental brushes, everything became a constant struggle to maintain control. They were both too proud, too reluctant to admit what was happening between them.

But what had really triggered the conflict was one particular night. After a long, exhausting expedition, when they were both worn out, Cassian had gotten too close. They had shared an intimate conversation, their barriers finally beginning to crumble. They had been drinking together, their bodies too close, and before they could stop, their lips met in a heated kiss, charged with everything they had been repressing.

But Y/N had stopped him. Just when things were getting more intense, she pushed him away, her breath ragged, and stepped back.

"We can’t do this, Cassian," she whispered, gasping.

"Why not?" he replied, looking at her, surprised and hurt.

"Because we can’t mix this with our work. I can’t afford to feel anything more for you. Not now." Her words had been harsh, but the truth was that she was scared. Cassian was too important, and the idea of losing him if something went wrong was unbearable.

She sighed, trying to relax and keep calm in the presence of the Illyrian.

"Why are you here, Cassian?" she finally asked, her voice softer than she had expected.

"I thought you might need to train after such a long time," he replied. "Though I should have asked, why are you here, Y/N?"

Training was just an excuse; the truth was that he had seen her from above as she tried to head to the cabin for the night. He could never confuse the silhouette of the woman who made his heart beat with more life. The moment they had shared weighed heavily on his shoulders. He had wondered if it was truly worth it, his mind replaying the sensation of their lips intertwined, how her fingers had tangled in his hair, how he had caressed her waist and the shiver she had given him.

Until she pushed him away.

Since that night, things had never been the same.

"You’re not in shape for that right now," he replied, evading her question, fiddling with one of the ribbons adorning his shirt.

"Why not? I’ve fought in worse conditions, darling," he reminded her.

She couldn’t help the shiver that coursed through her body at the endearing word, a nervousness that settled deep in her heart, warm and delightful. Only Cassian could have that effect on her. And it didn’t help that she now crossed her arms, mimicking his stance.

"You just got back, and you have a cut on your side," she acknowledged through clenched teeth, still not meeting his gaze, finding the tips of his shoes far more interesting.

Y/N had scanned Cassian’s body moments earlier, quickly assessing every scratch and bruise. It didn’t take long for her to realize that one of the wounds needed immediate attention.

“So, you were worried about me,” Cassian stated, his heart racing, knowing that even from a distance she could hear it.

“Only because Rhysand asked me to make sure you got here safely.”

Cassian stepped closer, closing the distance between them. He uncrossed his arms, his hands clenched into fists at his sides, restraining the urge to reach out and touch her fingers. She was so close, yet so far. And it was killing him, an agony he could barely endure.

“Are you sure?” he questioned, his gaze burning into her. “Look me in the eyes and tell me you don’t care,” he demanded, his voice rough, not sure how much longer he could contain the flood of emotions waiting to burst free. Deep down, he hoped this would be the moment.

The wind picked up, causing Y/N to close her eyes for a moment. She took a deep breath, allowing the cool air to clear her mind, though she knew she couldn’t escape for long. She knew his voice, his gaze, would betray her, revealing what she had been hiding so carefully—the reason she rarely let her guard down around him.

So, she turned toward the path leading to the cabin where they would spend the night, and he followed behind her.

“Y/N…” he stopped as she spoke.

“Don’t, Cassian. Don’t make things more complicated,” she growled.

“Complicated?” he repeated, quickening his pace to block her path. “Since when is feeling something complicated?” he asked, frustration lacing his words.

Her heart raced at his words.

"Always," she replied.

The Illyrian finally closed the distance between them, and she stopped abruptly, colliding with his chest in the process. He held her to keep her from falling.

The gentle touch of Cassian’s large hands on her hips sent an involuntary tremor through her body, a burning heat spreading from where he touched her, reaching deep within. The firmness and security of his grip made her realize that he was willing to do anything for her.

Y/N fixed her gaze on the steady look of the warrior. She knew she could no longer hide the truth. His hazel eyes were so beautiful, hypnotic; losing herself in them would always be an option for her.

He had admired Y/N from a distance, appreciating each of her features. He had been in love with her for some time now—her eyes, the shape of her lips, her laughter—all from afar. He would give anything for her to be his.

It had always been a push-and-pull, a game they both played far too well. If it went right, she would let her guard down for a moment, and Cassian would give her everything. Or they would start all over again.

"I can’t keep pretending I don’t care about what happens to you. And I know you can’t either," Cassian growled, fed up with the situation.

Y/N could feel the heat of his body, the scent of leather and metal that enveloped him. The weight of his words settled like a poisoned dagger piercing her heart. If this argument were a war, she was sure she would never win.

"It’s not that simple, Cassian," her voice barely a whisper.

"It is," he countered, leaning in to meet her eyes. "What’s not simple is pretending I don’t feel what I feel. I know you feel it too. Just say it, Y/N, and I’ll be yours," he pleaded.

She lowered her gaze, but he gently lifted her chin with a finger. He moved the hand that had rested on her hip, trailing it along her cheek, taking a loose strand of her hair that had escaped her braid. With all the tenderness in the world, with a gentleness that stripped her bare, he tucked the strand behind her pointed ear.

Instinctively, she closed her eyes, fighting against the torrent of emotions threatening to overflow—a battle to resist that soft caress despite the warrior's calloused fingers.

He was right. She had lost. She had fought to keep the walls up. But with Cassian… those walls were useless.

“It’s dangerous,” she finally murmured.

“When have I ever cared about danger, Y/N?” he said, smiling—a soft smile.

When she opened her eyes, she really looked at him. Cassian's gaze had softened. She would give anything for him to always look at her with that intensity, with the affection he was showing at that moment. She knew that, no matter how much she wanted to pull away, no matter how much she wanted to protect herself, there was no turning back.

“Don’t,” she warned, but it was already too late.

Cassian tilted his head, his lips brushing hers—just a light touch, almost a question, giving her one last chance to stop him. But she didn’t. Their lips met in a kiss full of repressed emotions, everything they had denied, everything they had left unsaid.

He held her, his wings spreading behind him like a shield, protecting her from everything else. In that moment, there was no war, no missions, no duty to fulfill. Just the two of them, surrounded by the night breeze, the stars shining brighter than ever, and the warmth of two bodies fitting together like pieces of a puzzle.

When they pulled apart, both were breathing heavily. The air around them seemed lighter, but the pounding of their hearts still echoed in their ears.

Y/N moved slightly away, resting her forehead against Cassian's. The silence that followed was as important as the words. There was no need to speak. For the first time in a long while, she allowed the silence to be her refuge.

"Now everything will be more complicated," she murmured against Cassian's lips, unable to suppress a slight smile.

"I like complicated," he said with a broad grin, his eyes shining with a warmth that made her heart race even faster.

She slowly unraveled her arms from around Cassian’s neck and held his hand. It was night, and in a couple of hours, they had to train the Illyrians.

"Where are we going?" he asked, curious, as she resumed the path toward the cabin.

"You need to shower, you smell bad andand that wound needs some attention," she said with a playful smile.

Cassian chuckled softly, and though the air between them was still charged, the sound of his laughter made Y/N's shoulders relax, just a little.

"Now you'll be my personal healer," he murmured.

"Maybe, if you're good."

He let go of her hand just to pull her against his chest, holding her gently by the waist as they walked together, their bodies brushing against each other, with him right behind her.

"I like that," he whispered in her ear. A shiver ran down Y/N's spine, settling warmly in her belly.

They arrived at the cabin, and it felt like death itself to part from each other. She headed to the small bathroom, where she grabbed a first aid kit filled with all the essentials.

The warlord had seated himself in one of the dining chairs, and when he heard her footsteps approaching, he gifted her a smile. She returned it.

Y/N placed the kit on the table, opened it, and took out the disinfectant to clean his wound. Cassian stripped off his upper leather gear, and she lost her breath at the sight of his broad shoulders, his chest adorned with dark tattoos that extended over his muscular arms and down to his defined abdomen. She did her best to keep her hands from trembling.

Cassian watched as she leaned in just enough to reach the cut on his left side, secretly enjoying the nervousness she tried to hide. Y/N carefully cleaned the area to ensure no dirt would come into contact with the injured skin when he showered, then applied a balm to help with the pain and speed up healing, finally covering it with a bandage. Luckily, the wound wasn't deep enough to require stitches—it would hold through the night until a healer in Velaris could check it again.

He didn't complain about the pain; he was used to it from countless battles since his youth. But the gentleness of Y/N as she tended to him was killing him. It was the first time anyone had treated him with such tenderness. Cassian felt her touch on his skin, watched the concentration on her face, each of her movements, wishing she could keep touching him forever.

"You’ll survive," she announced, meeting his gaze. "You should go shower; I’ll heat up some food."

Cassian didn’t argue and showered as quickly as he could to get back to her, careful not to disturb the bandage. On the table, there was some soup, stew, cheese, and bread. The warmth that filled his heart was priceless, but it had a name.

Seated at the table, they enjoyed the meal and each other's company in silence. She savored the peace of the moment, wishing it could last forever.

"Thank you," Cassian whispered, his voice filled with affection, "for... taking care of me, for the food."

"We should rest," she simply responded.

Y/N could still feel the tension in the air, even after the peaceful dinner. But Cassian wasn't going to let more time pass, not after that kiss. When she stood up from the chair, he gently grabbed her wrist and pulled her into his lap. She didn’t resist. Sitting with her thighs on either side of his hips, her chest pressed against his, their faces were just a breath away from kissing.

He couldn't help but imagine having her like this every day, every hour, every minute, for the rest of his life. To unite his soul with hers, becoming one.

"Forgive me, Cassian. I'm sorry for avoiding you all this time. You have no idea how much I’ve wanted to tell you how much you mean to me, and that there isn't a day that goes by when I don't think about how much it hurts to even consider losing you every time you leave. I'm scared that if I close my eyes one day, you won’t be there anymore," Y/N's broken voice interrupted his thoughts.

He wiped away a tear that had slipped down her cheek without her realizing. Cassian, with reverent care, making sure not to touch her bandage, caressed her as if his entire existence depended on that touch. He placed a hand on her neck, his fingers gently tracing her skin with infinite tenderness before pulling her into a slow kiss. A kiss that promised more than words, a kiss that would last an eternity, as if there was nothing else in the world he wanted more than to be with her forever.

He was the first to pull away, watching her tear-filled eyes, her cheeks flushed from silent crying.

"I would drag myself home," he murmured while kissing her right cheek, "even if I were on the verge of death, because it means that my home is with you." He kissed her left cheek. "I would come back to life if I had to, just so I wouldn’t make you cry," and he finished with his lips brushing hers. A promise of life, even if his body lay cold and alone on the ground, he would crawl back to her.

"I love you, Cassian," she confessed softly in his ear. "I would do anything; I would be willing to trade my life for yours."

Those words echoed through his body like adrenaline rushing through him before a battle. He had longed for Y/N’s heart to sing along to a symphony composed by both of them. He pulled her closer to him.

"I love you, my sweet Y/N," Cassian murmured, his voice rough and filled with an unbreakable truth as his fingers tangled in her hair. "Even if you would sacrifice your life for mine, my existence would mean nothing without you. You are the reason my heart beats and my soul remains alive."

She felt regret for having wasted time in doubt, but at the same time, it had led her to the arms of the man she loved.

Cassian kissed her neck, caressing her back up and down her spine, feeling the warmth radiating from her. He wanted the moment to last, to feel her on his body, to feel her heart beating in sync with his.

"We should rest, my love," he whispered gently.

"Yes, you must be tired," Y/N apologized as she pulled away from him.

He wiped away the remaining tears from her cheeks and kissed her nose, regardless of her state.

"I'm just saying I would love to sleep with you right now; the chair isn’t comfortable for resting," he murmured, his voice hoarse.

"You're right," she laughed, a watery laugh.

He scooped her up in his arms and carried her to the small room, gently placing her on the floor to allow her to prepare for a nap. There were only a few hours left until dawn. Cassian grabbed some extra blankets to ward off the cold that permeated the room, though he always felt wrapped in a warmth that no blanket could provide when he was with her.

He waited patiently lying on the bed. When she finished, he spread the blanket so she could lie down beside him, pulling her into his chest as she rested her head there. Together, wrapped in blankets, Y/N closed her eyes, feeling the steady heartbeat of Cassian beneath her head. The future remained uncertain—missions, war... but in that moment, with their bodies close. 

Two souls destined to be together, a kiss sealed with the promise of a tomorrow was enough.

*divider by @cafekitsune , thank you <33.

Tags: @wirdbeimaufhebengebunden

A/N: I rewrote this at least 4 times or maybe more, I felt like it wasn't perfect but now I'm satisfied with the result. I hope you like it, let me know what you think. Love you guys.

[lovecla]

TAKE YOUR PAIN AWAY | quinn hughes.

chapter one:

➴ warnings: shitty mom.

➴ word count: 2.6k

➴ author’s note: and finally, the first chapter of TYPA is here. i wanted to post this only when i had at least the first five chapters ready so you guys wouldn’t wait too long for updates, so thank u all for waiting. again, i cannot stress this enough: read the story’s warnings before reading the story!!! aaand i love u all!!! (also thank u for 200+ followers? insane!)

౨ৎ

2024, MARCH

YOUR ALARM went off at half past five, and you grunted, smacking it with your right hand, trying to make it stop yelling.

After you turned it off, you laid your bed on your pillow again, sighing. Turning your head to the side, you watched as Bella snored like she paid all of your bills and worked a nine to five everyday. You smiled, happy to see her so relaxed.

You got up, put on your slippers and walked to your bathroom, turning on the lights and regretting immediately after, because your eyes took a long time to adjust to the bright, white light.

You opened the tap, putting in warm water and gently wetting your face, before closing it and grabbing your cleanser and starting your morning skincare routine.

Even though you loved to stay in bed, there was something about the early hours of the day. You could go on with your morning with no one bothering you, just working on the steps of completing your morning routine with ease, while the world was still asleep outside— even though Los Angeles never got entirely asleep.

You can wash your face and apply your moisturizer, before stepping in the shower after letting your skin absorb the products. Then, you can scrub your body and exfoliate it, humming to this week’s top song on Spotify charts. You can dry yourself with your fluffiest towel, smear your skin with your favorite vanilla scented body lotion and perfume.

Then, you can wake Bella up, and force her to leave your bed so you can make it. She’ll growl and bark at you, but in the end she’ll be too eager to go outside to do anything else.

You’ll change into your outfit of the day, something cozy, and grab your keys before leaving the house with Bella by your side, taking her to the dog park your apartment complex has, and let her enjoy the synthetic grass while you stare at her, smiling from ear to ear.

You’ll both stay there for ten minutes, with you talking to her about everything and anything, while she sniffs around the place and answers your yapping with occasional barks.

Then, you’ll call her name and go back to your place, starving for food. You’ll make your breakfast, nothing too heavy— a cup of green tea and a yogurt bowl.

You’ll leave your house at sometime around seven a.m., after grabbing everything you’ll need for the day and saying goodbye to Bella, telling her that her dog sitter, Carly, will be there in just a few hours. You’ll get into the car your agency sent to you, greeting the driver and sitting in the back, checking the texts on your phone. And then, you will feel your heart stop inside your chest, because—

What the hell does she want? You thought, squeezing your phone so hard between your hands that, for a second, you thought you’d actually break it.

You haven’t seen your mom in a year. Or your family, for that matter. Your parents, your brother and Canada felt just like a distant, hurtful memory that you wanted to keep away from yourself, buried deep inside your heart.

After making your teenage years feel like hell, and after making you hate yourself in more ways you’d ever think possible, your mom got you signed at the most prestigious modeling agency in all LA, IMG Models. Some people online talked about how you were only the cover of last year’s VOGUE because you’re basically a Nepo Baby, and even though your social media team did their best to debunk those comments, you knew— everyone did— that they were right: you only reached the top that fast because you are the daughter of the editor-in-chief of Fashion and retired model, Jessica Carter.

Not that you weren’t pretty, no, you were. But your last name opened more doors for you than your face and body ever would.

But at the end, you were grateful to be living a normal life— as normal as it could get— away from Canada. That country held painful memories and people that you would much rather watch from afar.

You didn’t reply to her text, you didn’t need to. She made it very clear that your attendance wasn’t an option. Even at twenty-two years old, your mom would always have the final word.

You arrived on set ten minutes after reading that text, sad to have your good mood ruined. But you still had a long day of work ahead of you, so you should just do what you’re best at: pretending you’re fine.

You spent your entire morning at a photoshoot for Elle, posing for infinite pictures and changing as fast as you could, while trying your hardest not to focus on your mom’s text.

Glad to be working with people who were actually nice, you slipped into your work headspace and when you checked your phone again, it was lunch time.

Grabbing the biggest salad from the agency’s restaurant, you ate with no hunger or pleasure. Thinking of your life back in Canada made you sick.

After lunch, you were sent to another location so they could take more pictures of you, the photographer, Garret, making sure to get the right photos of you.

At six, you were ready to head back to home, but unfortunately, part of your job meant interacting with people on social media. Sometimes answering questions online, making TikToks or even posting on Instagram.

౨ৎ

maddiecarter

liked by gigihadid, champagnepapi, darianka and 560,929 others.

maddiecarter @britishvogue 🧸

View all 12,082 comments

avaholly she’s just so pretty i cant

justinpll looked at my gf and sighed

gio_hrris @helenhugo this yo boyfriend?

helenhugo @gio_hrris EX boyfriend now.

britishvogue Stunning 🤩

imgmodels you never disappoint bbg 😌

lisacoleman i love u thank u for blessing my feed

౨ৎ

“ARE YOU leaving already, darlin’?”

Nicholas’ voice echoed as you bend over to grab your purse.

Looking at him, you smiled, tiredly. “Yes, hum. Actually, I need to talk to you about something,” you took a step further, stopping in front of the man you've known as your boss the past four years.

“Yeah, go ahead.” He leaned against the wall, waiting.

“I need to have Friday off,” you started, biting your lip. “It’s a family thing. Promise I’ll be back on Monday.”

“Madison, you’re literally the only model here who hasn’t missed a work day for an entire year, maybe even more than that,” he laughs, blond hair moving as his head turns around. “If you want to take the entire week off, you’re allowed to.”

A week in Toronto? No, thank you.

“No, I just need Friday.” You replied, adjusting your bag on your shoulder.

“You’re free to go, my love. Send kisses to your mom, okay? Tell her to visit us sometime.”

“Of course, thank you.” You kissed his cheek quickly before heading back to the elevator.

On your way home, you thought about all of the things your mom might want of you. Sure, she said that she wanted the family to get together and all of that, but you’re sure there’s more to that. She wouldn’t make you fly to Canada just because she wants to have dinner with you. She’s just not that kind of person.

Entering your apartment, the first thing you did after removing your shoes was go looking for Bella, who had somehow managed to lock herself inside the guest's bathroom, and was whining loudly.

“Naughty, naughty girl,” you kissed her, petting her fur gently. “How did you even do that?”

She just licked you and you sighed, the long hours of work finally hitting you completely. You just needed to shower, drink your daily glass of warm milk and play with Bella for a while before going to bed.

Locking away all thoughts related to Canada, you followed your night routine like you’d usually do, trying your hardest to let the people you buried years ago stay away like you wanted them to.

[rojacatmisa]

Chapter 10 ➺ Not a cloud in sight

Hey readers! I think this chapter can almost be read as a one shot as long as you read the summary first! It's a shorter and very fluffy chapter, still minor DNI sorry. Thanks, tough ones, that are keeping up with that really long story! It's still not the end of it!

Starting over in Madrid

Misa Rodriguez x Reader (Nicky/first person)

After moving to Madrid as the new Real Madrid photographer, Nicky's eyes can't look away from the pretty face of Misa Rodriguez. But how is she going to handle her growing desire for the Canarian goalkeeper when her working contract's strictly forbidding her to date players?

Chapter 1 ➺ A harder job than I thought Chapter 2 ➺ Clearly on a bad slope Chapter 3 ➺ Calmly panicking Chapter 4 ➺ Hell Clasico Chapter 5 ➺ Valleys and peaks Chapter 6 ➺ Paris est magique! Chapter 7 ➺ In the haze Chapter 8 ➺ Confusion and directions Chapter 9 ➺ A place for words

TW: smut +18, mention of periods 4,5K words

✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧ 

"Ladies and gentlemen please remain seated and attached during takeoff ."

My fingers squeezed the hand she had let out for me on the armrest.

"I’m glad I’m not seated next to you when we travel with the Real or I’d have a broken hand by now!" the goalkeeper chuckled lightly and winced, my grip crushing her palm as I focused on the cover of a magazine stored in the back of the seat in the front row. "Relax and enjoy your fight to Formentera" the title said provocatively. I was nowhere close to being relaxed, Misa’s poor hand being the proof of my fear of flying right now. 

I had never been an air person, afraid of highs, planes, and even of kites when I was young. My two feet had always felt right on spot when being firmly on the ground or at least less than ten feet above it. That was why I couldn’t even answer the goalie when the plane quitted the earth and took off toward the sky at full speed. 

I closed my eyes and tried hard to concentrate on the warm and large hand under mine. My grip loosen slightly, my palm was sweating and I wiped it on my jeans before taking Misa’s hand back. Her skin felt soft, her fingertips attempted soothing motions and succeed at making me loose my focus on the speed, the high and the feeling of being trapped. Misa’s fingers were always distracting.

The plane stabilized and the now familiar "seatbelt is no longer required" sound rang out and my eyes flung opened. "Respira, Cariño. Estoy aquí para ti", Misa left my hand but only to lift the armrest so she could wrap her arm around my shoulders. Her other hand found my chin and lift it, and I could do nothing but dive in her brown eyes as she led her face closer until her plump lips pressed lightly onto mine. 

I closed my eyelides again to let her kiss take me away from the plane. The feel of her lips ghosting all over my face sent shivers in my body, followed by the first itches of desire. I briefly thought of how easily Misa could work me up and wondered if there would be a day the tiniest contact of her lips wouldn’t make me want her at once. To put a stop to my growing excitement, I preferred to snuggle up to her. Breathing in her sweet perfume helped me finally relax a bit. 

"I know it’s not obvious right now but I’m like, really really happy we go on holidays together, Mis’", I murmured. 

"Oh… I was precisely thinking I should have left you at the airport…"

"I don’t believe you, nasty girl…" 

The young woman wrapping arm pulled me closer and she kissed my forehead, "En verdad, I can’t wait you meet Jenni, Ale and Laia, Cari!"

"You know, I’m a bit anxious to see them since you told me you and Jenni jumpscared Alexia so much once, she almost threw up…" 

"Don’t be scared, you’re perfectly loca para nosotras, you’ll blend in no time!" We both chuckled until a shake of the plane made me tense again and I sunk deeper into the goalie’s cuddles. 

***

The taxi parked in front of a large modern villa with the biggest bay windows I’d ever seen. The house was juste above one of the many beaches of Formentera island, framed by many pine trees and colorful flowery bushes, the hard sun of noon perfecting the chic summer decor. 

We picked up our luggages and went to the front door, Misa rang the doorbell while I twisted my fingers nervously, feeling so intimidated by meeting her closest friends. 

"¡Estan aquí! Ya voy!" I heard from behind the door. I stepped aside, half hiding behind the goalie as the door opened in front of us. 

Jennifer Hermoso was one hell of a woman, no, it was more than that, it felt like a hurricane was about to swept us both when Jenni saw us and jumped on her friend with many hugs and excited words of welcome. 

After what, she turned to me, so tall and muscled she could have been really intimidating if wasn’t for her large and warm smile. "Nicky! Por fin nos conocemos!" As Jenni hugged me eagerly, two other faces appeared in the door way. 

"Jenni, acaba de llegar, déjala respirar", said a blond sturdy woman who could be no one but the charismatic and famous Alexia Putellas. 

The third one, Laia Codina, added "La estás ahogando, Jenni."

But Misa interrupted the chatty women, "Hey… chicas, habla ingles porfi, Nicky entiende algunas frases pero no habla corramente español", and the three of them nodded in agreement before we followed them inside the villa.

"Nicky! So it is you who snatched the heart of our bromista Misa!" Jenni wave to me to come to the kitchen bar as she pulled a bottle of tequila from the cupboard. The other footballers quickly joined at fetching the different cocktail ingredients. 

I pulled a nervous smile "Yeah, it’s me. What does bromista means?" 

"It means prankster!" Laia exclaimed from across the kitchen. "Chicas, do you realize Misa la malota has found a girl ? How do you stand her, Nicky? Everybody here knows she’s disreputable." 

With a little smile on her lips, Misa huffed and rolled her eyes as she aligned five glasses in front of the striker, who was pouring tequila into a big shaker. 

"I’m keeping an eye on her", I said, looking proudly at the goalie leaning on the bar beside me, and I patted the top her head.

The three footballers simultaneously released a tenderized "Ohhhhh". 

"She’s the good one for you, Misa", said Alexia. 

"Yes, she hasn’t even argued with the fact that you’re a mean girl", Jenni pointed out.

"She’s got what you need, I say you should married her now", concluded Laia. 

That made me laugh, the nonsense of the three friends but especially the goalkeeper’s exasperated pout.

"I knew it was going to be like this…", Misa sighed, resigned. 

Jenni handed Misa a few limes, a knife and a juicer, "Exprima las limas, porfa. We wouldn’t let you get away without checking Nicky’s alright, we know you, Hermanita", she said before turning to me, "Nickita, swimming pool or city tour this afternoon?" 

"Pool’s great", I answered, too tired from the flight to really enjoy a long walk in town. 

I couldn’t suppress a yawn. "You want to take a nap? There is no rush", Misa asked me while putting the freshly pressed lime juice into the shaker. 

Laia and Alexia leant onto the bar and whispered to each other, peering at us mischievously. "She’s so soft when she’s talking to her"

"Lover Misa is back on board!"

"Look at her sparkling eyes!"

"¡Basta! Chicas!" Misa grumbled, "It’s getting annoying!" 

Jenni laughed, "You’re such a joke! You’d be doing ten times worst if you were in our position!" 

"You don’t know, I was never in that position", the goalie shrugged. 

Jenni precisely divided the shaken beverage between the glasses, handed each woman a cocktail and a friendly shove at the goalie.

"Sabes que te queremos Misa! Bienvenida a Nicky ! Salud Chicas, holidays has just started!" she said, lifting her glasses, and we joined her in a profusion of joyful exclamations.

***

Holidays weren’t just holidays. 

It took me a moment to realize I didn’t have to drop Misa’s hand or tear my eyes from hers as soon as I’d heard footsteps approaching. I didn’t have to abruptly stop a kiss like we often did when we’d snatch an intimate moment in the looker room. 

During the first days, I couldn’t be close to the goalie, the kind of closeness that means more than standing next to her, in front of her friends, jumping or twitching uncomfortably with the feeling of being observed. 

Misa, on her side, didn’t seem to have internalize our hiding habits. She often came to hug me or put a swift kiss on my lips every time she had the occasion, causing her infernal friends to gossip more each time. It was true Jenni, Alexia and Laia quickly made me feel confortable, mocking and teasing everyone like I had always been part of their groupe and even Jenni’s amused and tender look began to feel like a caring presence. 

A few days passed and I barely hided when my eyes devoured the goalie dripping body climbing out of the pool. I only tempered myself by modesty and to avoid being the target of new mockeries. The next day, the way I giggled when Misa pulled me on her lap while sun tanning even made me feel light, her mouth grazing my bare skin only a cute demonstration of affection. 

So slowly I got it, being here meant being free. 

I could feel being both her friend and lover when she would absentmindedly put her hand on my thigh, grab my waist when I’d passed by or whispered something silly in my ear as we chatted all together by the pool. We could hold hands when our little groupe wandered around the streets of Es Pujols. We could dance pressed together in a tender making out at the club, surrounded by people who didn’t give a damn about Real Madrid and who was kissing its goalkeeper. 

But the best part of it was to be with her, all day, all night, days after days. There were no goodbyes, no being appart, even for a day or so, no moments in between. Just moments with my girlfriend, living with my girlfriend and enjoying every little bit of it, from her burned morning toasts to her loud snores having me to put earplugs every nights. It was like an endless day off in Madrid where not only a city but a whole island stood ready for us to explore as a couple, surrounded by friends, with no other things in mind than planing our next cruise or booking a local speciality restaurant we wanted to try.

Being Misa’s girlfriend was easy and flowing like the waveless sea of Formentera. 

***

“ … and they found the guilty vein and burned it”, Misa finished, smiling mildly at my astonished expression.  

I reset my position on the stone bench, crossing my legs, the screeching of cicadas filling our last night on the island. “And it healed your tachycardia?” 

“Yes, I was healed and able to play football again!” she concluded with small laugh like going through conscient heart surgery at the age of thirteen was nothing more than buying bread. 

I was gagging, impressed by her courage at a young age and by the strength and determination it gave her since. "Woaw, I’m speechless. You already loved football back then".

"Football is my passion for life, I can’t live without it. Like… you couldn’t live without chocolate chips cookies".

I slapped her shoulder, "Tsss, silly girl! You’re just bummed because you can’t eat my biscuits!"

"No, I swear you have a problem with sweet food, Nicky! Your cupboards are always full of it! Like, your kitchen is stuffed with several boxes of the same biscuit, it looks like a shop!" Misa laughed, looking at me tenderly. 

"You never know what could happen, I don’t want to go hungry in the middle of the night and have nothing to eat…"

"It has never happened since we started dating. I’m telling you, you’re addicted to sugar! I should call you Azúcariño from now."

And Misa took me in her arms, love in her eyes so visible I blushed and was happy for the darkness of that part of the garden. "You would not!" I chuckled, moving a strayed strand of hair from her face. 

"I surely would, Azúcari."

The brunette was already laying small kisses all over my face, making me laugh more, something in me purring deliciously at the feel of being loved so much. 

"You’re so sweet, Mis’", I said wrapping my arms around her broad comforting shoulders. "You’re right, I’m addicted. You’re my dark chocolate chunky cookie, all strong and sweet". 

Misa and I simply looked fondly at each other a moment, the moonlight reflecting in our shiny eyes while my fingertips traced random shapes on her nap. Then, I softy pressed my lips on hers and we lost ourselves in a long kiss as music started to resound from afar. 

“Everything is ready!”

I startled at the sound of Jenni’s voice close by, followed by the rustling noise of leaves and the tall and lean silhouette of the striker appeared behind us. 

"Hola tortolitos! Stop your crap and join the party!"

"Party!" Misa jumped on her feet at once "Vamos Nicky, yeahhhh!", she screamed, running toward the house. 

Jenni and I both rolled our eyes. "Misa…", we giggled in synch. 

When we arrived near the pool, Misa was already dancing like a beast with Laia, both of them covering the song with their voice. Jenni was quick to join them while I preferred to go sit in a lounge chair beside Alexia, watching her three teammates with a motherly look. 

"They’re always wild", she laughed. 

"Yeah, they’re having so much fun", I agreed, my eyes not leaving the bouncing shape of Misa dancing and jumping excitedly while looking in turn at Jenni and Laia. 

"And you Nicky, are you having good holidays ?"

I sighed of ease, "Perfect". 

The footballer chucked lightly "Good, I’m happy for you two. I hope you’ll find a way about the work problem", Alexia added a bit awkwardly. 

My heart tightened. Of course Misa has told them about the clause. I was searching my mind about what to say when two large hands pulled me to my feet and dragged me to the dance floor.  

"You have to dance on this one, it’s Formentera de Aitana! So right on point!", Misa told me, hopping in place while pushing me in the middle of the dancing girls. Soon their spirit took me too and we all sang in a chaos of false notes. 

We danced for hours, song after song. Time didn’t seem to exist as the party stretched in the night, cocktails and beer refilled as soon as swallowed. 

"No! No! Misaaaa! Noooooo!", I screamed in vain as the goalkeeper heaved me in her arms and ran toward the swimming pool with little care for my protests. A second later, our bodies broke the water surface with a huge splash.

I regain my breath, spitting "Fuck you Mis’! I wanted to wear those shoes tomorrow! And you took yours off before jumping! » I yelled, mad at the sight of the abandoned white snickers beside the pool.

The goalie just laughed and pulled me close to her, the melodious notes of the music accompanied our bodies pressing against each other in the water.

"Te quiero a ti… let’s go upstairs, we’ll say we’re tired". The brunette softy said, knowing exactly how to make herself forgiven, and I shivered with the realisation of how badly I wanted her right now.

***

I pushed Misa against the bedroom mirror, her hair still wet from the pool sent droplets on the glass. Our room was in fair distance from the party, we had closed all the doors we could and the air was warm and loaded with humidity inside the villa. 

My fingers slipped under her drenched T shirt and rose along her spine to reach the hook of her bra. I pulled both of them off, took a step back to take in the half naked figure of the goalkeeper. A smug smile spread on Misa’s face as my look got heavier with desire. 

Her hands grasped her own short, she slowly pushed it down her ankle and stepped out of them. She dared stay there a moment, in front of the mirror, the reflection presenting to me her bare body from every angles. 

I reached out to her, pressing against her. “You’re fucking gorgeous...” I yelped on her lips and she led me onto the bed, laying on her back before swiftly pulling me over her. I chuckled at her eagerness, taking my top off as I straddled her.

“I was dying to do that for hours! You were so pretty on that bench...” she panted, working at undressing me as well. But she froze as she pulled my pantie down. “Uh, um, mierda... Nicky, you’re having your period..."

“What?! No!“ I moaned bitterly, jumping off her and heading to the bathroom. “Fucking shit! No!”.

Misa groaned from the bedroom “Madre mia! Not on our last night together!”

“I think I'm more frustrated that you!” I said, changing pantie and coming back to the bed. I sent her a pleading look before bending down toward her lips. I kissed them softly, felt my core already screaming for her touch and my stomach swirling lightly. “But I think I’m ok to take care of you all night long, then” I confessed, chuckling at my girlfriend fidgeting under me. 

The goalie let out a small whimper and closed her eyes as her fingers sunk in my hair. Still kissing her with passion, I slowly spread my legs, opening hers wide in the same movement. Misa released another whine and squirmed. I was aiming to work her up and we stayed like this a moment, depending our kiss and caressing.

The quickening rhythm of her breathing encouraged me to hold on. I sent a finger tracing the shape of her abs and felt her hips bucking over nothing. My palms brushed the insides of her tights, going, but very slowly, toward her intimacy. Her hips wiggled again, accompanied by a low moan. “Nicky... you want me to be as frustrated as you?” 

“Shh, just wet a little more for me” I teased, not really minding if she had get the play on the word as the young woman pulled my lips against her neck and sighed. I took my time to lick the soft skin there and ended by nipping her earlobe, sending a shiver along the goalkeeper’s wriggling body.

Lowering my hips, I spread her legs more and started to press against her powerful tights. The moves sent her body upward in little trusts, her intimacy still spread out and completely left alone. Misa’s brows were furrowed, lost in her longing as her arms ensnared my neck.

“Por qué me torturas así?” the brunette shuddered against my lips.  

It was my time to moan, the thought of arousing Misa beyond reason blowing my mind and setting my lower belly afire. I continued to grind on her more roughly as I pined both her hands onto the pillow. Her chest rose up as she arched, whining more, and presented itself irresistibly to me. 

I descended my mouth to graze at the flower tattooed between her breast. My lips found her nipple and sucked it gently. Her legs wrapped themselves around my hips as I eagerly licked her chest, turning both of us into a whining mess. The brunette legs were pressing on mine, desperate for a contact between them but I hold them wide apart and she finished by closing her eyes, her plump lips parting to let out frustrated whimpers.

My mouth ended her complaint, pushing my tongue between her teeth and my fingers between her legs. Her jaw dropped as she released a long sigh of relief. Misa was drenched, having me panting with delight and I waisted no time before gathering her wetness on my fingers tips to coat her lips and slide easily on her core. Her pelvis moved along with my fingers. She had buried her face in the side of my neck, her mouth on my ear allowed me to perceive every sounds of her jerky breathing, making my hairs bristle and my brain dizzy with want.

When I stared to move in circles on her clit, the woman moans turned into tormented cries. She squirmed again, her pelvis pressing more against my hand and sliding my fingers downer. 

Getting where Misa wanted me most, I tried to settle better over her body when I heard her whiny voice in my ear. “The strap we brought, in the drawer facing the bed… I want you… llévame”

I moaned, her demand spreading goosebump over my all body, and rose up at once to retrieve the precious item. I opened the drawer, searching at the back of it, my hand falling on a suggestive shape wrapped in a silky black fabric and I swiftly pulled out a purple toy and a harness. 

Misa stretched lasciviously as she watched me put on the harness, securing the toy in it and coming back onto the bed over her. Her hooded eyes kept looking up at me expectantly, yet her moves directed my body over her, guiding my hips until the end of the strap rubbed against her core. The sexual tension between us was so strong it was palpable as we continued to stare in each other eyes, our breath rasping and our hips moving in anticipation. 

I led the strap downer to line it up with her entrance. “listo?” I preferred to ask, making sure she was still willing to take it. 

Misa nodded and enfold me with her arms as I began to push very slowly. The goalie winced at the stretch, her grasp tightening around my shoulders. “Are you alright?” I checked. 

“Sí” she sighted, “Bésame, Nicky.” 

I obeyed immidialaty, kissing the corner of her mouth while pushing further inside. Misa’s mouth fell open. A particularly loud cry filled the bedroom, her back arching when my hips met her pelvis. I waited for her to get used to the feel, our face pressed together in a tender making out, and pulled out softy. Her hands racked randomly on my back, holding me closer as I plunged the strap again and I started to make love to her. 

I slightly quickened the pace, Misa whined louder, her hips accompanying the new rhythm. As she arched more, her head fell back onto the pillow, her arms going up and her fingers digging into it. My nose grazed the crook of her exposed neck, inhaling her intoxicating scent.

I was beyond the point of excitement, feeling something hot and swollen growing inside me as my love for Misa seemed to overflowed all around us, bonding us more than the strap between our legs. I felt the toy going in less easily, guessed she was tightening around it and I slowed down. The rhythm less demanding, my glance rested on her face, her blissed out features were more than I could take in. 

A high pitch moan escaped my lips. Misa opened her eyes, two dark pools reflecting my own craving. I couldn’t suppress a strangle yelp as something burst inside of me. My hips pressed against her pelvis as my body shivered under the uncommonly soft and fluttering orgasm that took over me. It felt different, less intense than coming at touching but it lasted as I stayed unmoving, buried inside of her. 

I paused a moment, my lips brushing her cheeks, breathing out my pleasure and emotions, before resuming my trusts inside and out. As soon as I moved again, her whines resounded in the bedroom, higher pitched, almost pleading now. Combined with the way her fingers sunk in my flesh, I could tell she was close and I started to pound harder and faster.

This time Misa fell silent. I felt the small blows of her breast on my face, erupting from her mouth each time I pushed my strap back inside. Her pretty features were frown hard, dying for a release, her all body clinging to the toy, her tights starting to tremble as I filled her again and again.

“Dios mio! ” She cried. I was panting now as I felt her clenching again. My forearms supporting my own weight were becoming shaky but I hold on, trying to keep a steady pace. I grasp her muscled shoulders, burring my face in her neck, knowing she could hear how insanely turned on I was by making love to her like that. 

A long cry escaped her soft lips, her brows furrowing more before relaxing completely when a last thrust pushed her over the edge. She yelled again and again, louder every time, her body wiggling with enjoyment under mine as her embrace tightened madly on me, locking me there when I wouldn't have moved an inch away from her. 

Her whimpering lasted, quieter now, and she loosened her grip. I pulled out of her and took the harness off. I dropped myself at her side, crawling back to her face. My heart was drumming in my chest with efforts and emotions as I kissed her cheek, my palms stroking her shivering body with all the tenderness I could. “I love you so much.” I sighed, feeling my eyes burning at the sight of her, crumbling with pleasure. 

Misa rolled toward me, her breathing was still shaky and her eyes shut tight as she nested her face against my chest. “Humm, love you Nicky” she whispered, her lips slightly trembling. “You make me feel so good, and safe.” 

I pressed her body closer, not baring the tiniest space between us, my heart bursting under my overwhelming feelings. Misa’s words felt like a gift nobody had ever give me… A few tears fell from my eyes before I knew what was happening, dripping on the goalie resting in my arms. 

She looked up at once, tender a first, then lost when she saw I was crying.

“It’s alright” I smiled, my voice heavy with my emotions, “I’ve never felt that way with anybody… you’re so special Misa, and you make me feel special too.”

Misa’s fingers delicately wiped the tears off my face, her lips pressing on my temple. “You’re going deeper than the strap…” the goalie’s chuckled, her own eyes shiny. 

I didn’t know for how long we stayed like this but we had fallen asleep for a long time when our bodies finally parted. When the light woke me up in the middle of the night, I realized we hadn’t pulled the curtain, the full moon high and bright in the cloudless sky. Tomorrow, each of us would return to their families for the rest of holidays. Misa and I would not see each other for three weeks.

I went back to bed after having closed the curtains, pressing my face between her shoulder blades and I started drifting back to sleep, her snores welcomed tonight, knowing that I was going to missed even that in a few days.

✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧ 

[solitablvd]

Read My Mind

**Minors DNI**

chapter one

Pairing: Demon!Javier Escuella x Female Reader

Summary: You’ve always been one who was lost in delusions of love and captivated by romance novels. One day, while exploring an antique store, you stumble upon a mysterious locket. Little do you know, this locket comes with a twist.

Warnings: NSFW, pure smut tbh, unprotected p in v, v fingering, more tags to come, female reader, brat Javier Escuella

Word Count: 2.3k

AO3 Link

chapter one:

As they cherished their final kiss, Jane knew that this boundless love they shared defied all limits. It was an eternal love that deserved to be honored in every way. As they walked down the aisle together, hand in hand, Jane felt her heart soar. In that moment, surrounded by the soft glow of the setting sun and the promises of forever, she knew that they were entering an endless journey where their love would continue to flourish. The world seemed to fade away, leaving only the two of them, united in a heavenly love. The End. 

You closed the book shut and held it close to your chest in cherishment. You were always a sucker for a happy ending. You let out a warm sigh, holding your knees close to your chest as you looked out the window of your home. Your private library window held the view of the town below. 

Saint Denis was beautiful this time of year. The city was full of life. Every person carried their own story. You watched as the people passed by, unbeknownst to your watchful eyes. You watched as a couple entered the nearby theater, seemingly on a date. This time you let out more of a wishful sigh as you thought about how that could one day be you. 

As you were approaching the age of marriage, it seemed that ideas of love and romance followed you everywhere. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t dream of them every night. You wanted to cherish and be cherished. You weren’t sure what love felt like, but you imagined it felt like time standing completely still. 

“Are you done lounging around?” A voice broke your daze.

It was your father, who stood at the doorway of the home’s library. Complaining, he continued, “You always have your head in the clouds and your nose in a book. Be a dear and go pick up the groceries for today, please.” 

“Of course.” You nodded dutifully, rising from your window seat and carefully placing your book back on the shelf. 

You bid your father a kind goodbye, made your way down the flight of stairs, and journeyed out into the city streets. The general store was not too far from your home, and luckily the shop owner was familiar with you. As you entered, he knew exactly what you needed for your father: a collection of different foods and items.

While he gathered everything you needed, you looked across the street through the glass pane window. 

The antique shop was always intriguing to you. You had only been inside once, to search through the collection of early printed books they had. Still, it held a fascinating factor as it was filled with trinkets that carried their own narratives. 

“I’ll be right back, sir.” You notified the shopkeeper, exiting the store and crossing the street to the antique shop.

The wooden floor creaked under you as you entered, feeling very different from the luxurious spaces you were accustomed to. Still, you continued, giving a kind greeting to the older man at the register. The walls were draped with framed prints of different landscapes, some that you could recognize as the Heartlands, but a few others that were from parts of the country unfamiliar to you. 

The shelves were filled with all sorts of curiosities and trinkets. One shelf was full of early printed books that looked delicate to the touch. Another was full of only different, elegant candlesticks. The air felt thick with the smell of aged paper and wood. As you looked around the shelves you felt fascinated by the beautiful porcelain figurines, their soft skin feeling cold to the touch. 

As you looked through the trinkets, your eyes became drawn to a small black box. The object piqued your curiosity. You lifted the item, opening it with care. The inside of the case was lined with a deep red velvet fabric on the inside that you would’ve been captivated by had your eyes not locked on to a necklace the case had been holding. 

The chain was golden and detailed intricately. But what you were most drawn to was the golden locket that was adorned with an engraving of a flaming heart, an interesting design choice for a locket that was both elegant and striking. You opened the locket, expecting to find an aged photo of the previous owner. Instead, the locket protected a clouded garnet stone. Your thumb brushed over the smooth stone; it was remarkable. 

Having made your decision, you closed the case and carried it to the register. 

After purchasing the necklace, you went to pick up your groceries then headed back to your home. You couldn’t hold back from temptation once you arrived at your home, rushing to the washroom to try on your newest piece of jewelry. The necklace was surprisingly heavy as you lifted it up to your neck, watching yourself in the mirror as you clasped the ends. The length was perfect, allowing the detailed locket to lay on your chest divinely. 

The rest of the evening passed as it did everyday. You ate dinner with your father, then read some more before finally preparing yourself for bed. 

Your thin white chemise rested loosely on your shoulders as you sunk to your knees and leaned forward on your bed, folding your hands neatly to pray before bed. As you whispered your prayer, a strong gust of wind pushed your window open. You jumped slightly, doing the sign of the cross before getting up to close the window. The city below was still bustling with people. 

Slipping under your white bed sheets, you leaned over and blew out the candle in your room. The only light in your room was now only the pale moonlight shining through your window. You could hear the rustling of trees outside, along with the sounds of the city that had grown comforting to you. With a deep sigh, you closed your eyes and drifted off to sleep. 

In the depth of the night, a voice whispered, smokey and intimate. “Wow.” 

You stirred, your eyebrows furrowing as you were unsure if the voice was part of your dream or reality. 

The same voice let out a deep, low chuckle. It sounded so distant, yet so close. The sound sent shivers down your spine, forcing you awake. You sat up quickly, blinking furiously as your eyes attempted to adjust to the dark room. 

On the couch near your window sat a dark figure. You could barely make out its silhouette in the darkness of your room. The figure became clearer with a snap of his fingers; fire sparked from the tip of his thumb as he brought it up to the cigarette hanging from his lips. The small flame allowed you to see more of him, his hair framing his carved features. He appeared elegant yet sinister. He paused slightly before lighting the cigarette. 

“You don’t mind if I smoke in here, do you?” He spoke again. The flame reflected in his dark, piercing eyes. You remained frozen in silence, feeling disoriented by the odd encounter. He looked at you expectantly, shrugging when you continued to give no response and lighting his cigarette anyway. He took a slow drag as he continued to connect his gaze with yours. 

“Who are you?” You asked wearily. 

“I can be whoever you want me to be.” He replied calmly, taking another drag from his cigarette and looking up at the ceiling. You stared at him further, still seated in your spot in your bed, not daring to move. 

Finally, he flicked the cigarette onto your carpeted floor. Your mouth opened to protest, but as he stepped on the cigarette it seemed to completely disappear from existence, leaving you both in complete darkness once again. 

“You’ve been longing for someone.” He spoke in an alluring tone, walking closer to your bedside. Your heart rate quickened as the distance between the two of you dwindled until he was standing right beside you. Getting a better look at him, you could see that he was wearing all black, with the tips of his boots providing the only pop of color in the form of a reflective gold. 

His hand reached out to grasp your chin, tilting your head up to look at him. His touch was surprisingly warm as if he was radiating his own heat. You gulped as you allowed his hand to guide your gaze, looking up to meet his. He looked at your features carefully, seemingly examining you. 

“Untouched paradise,” He muttered almost inaudibly. 

As he held your chin you could not deny the attraction you felt to the mysterious man. He had a hauntingly alluring energy, completely drawing you in. You felt a newfound sensation of want growing within you. He smirked at you slightly, making your eyes flicker down to his lips. 

He moved his thumb to now rest against your bottom lip, brushing it lightly before delicately pulling your lip down. Your breathing hitched as his thumb slowly entered your mouth. You opened your mouth ever so slightly to let him in. His other hand made its way to snake around your neck, not putting any pressure, but holding you in place as he moved his thumb slowly in and out your mouth. You allowed your lips to tighten around him, sucking slightly. 

“There you go,” He whispered deeply, focusing his gaze on your lips as they continued to move around his thumb.

He took a deep breath, moving his hand to run through your hair, “Lay back.” 

You did as he said: laying back slowly and keeping your eyes on him. You felt a strong tension growing. Your head hit your pillow and you looked up to the ceiling with a heavy breath. The bed shifted slightly with his weight as he sat beside you. 

You gasped lightly as you felt his hand trail up your thigh, reaching for your undergarments. He pinched the hem with his fingers and slid them down your body. The pulsing sensation was new to you, and was driving you to the point of desperation. 

His hand caressed your waist as the other pushed your raised knees apart. He used his fingers to tease you slightly, rubbing you in small circles. His touch made you tense slightly as you had never experienced anything like this before. 

“Relax.” He whispered encouragingly. You nodded, taking a deep breath to calm yourself. He collected your slick on his finger before slowly inserting it into you. You let out another gasp as he curled his finger in you, working his finger to slowly massage you. 

As he slowly inserted another finger into you, you let out a louder gasp, clenching around him while he began to move his fingers at a curated pace. His fingers stretched you slowly. Your hands gripped on the pillow underneath your head, letting the moans leave your mouth as you bucked your hips against his touch. 

He chuckled lowly as he slipped his fingers out of you, seemingly enjoying your growing desperation. He brought them up to his mouth to taste you. You watched as he seductively sucked your slick off his fingers, maintaining eye contact with you as he did so. When he was finished, he gave you a quick wink before shifting to get in between your legs. 

He placed his hands on either side of you, keeping himself lifted above you. You hadn’t even noticed that his clothes had now vanished completely, leaving him undone on top of you. He pushed your chemise up past your raised knees. 

You let your hands rest on his toned biceps, biting back your moan as he slowly pushed himself into you. He was a lot bigger than his fingers. You gripped him tightly and winced slightly as he finally fit all of himself into you. 

“You okay?” He asked. Through your tremble, you nodded at him. 

He remained still for a moment, seemingly letting you get comfortable with the new sensation before he began to move at an achingly slow pace. You couldn’t hold back the small gasps that escaped your lips with every slow thrust of his hips. His grip on your bed sheets tightened as he began to move a little quicker, keeping his gaze low as you squirmed below him with pleasure. 

The pooling in your lower stomach began to grow as your moans became incoherent, your fingernails digging into his arms desperately. He groaned above you, still keeping his gaze low as you threw your head back and moaned in pleasure. 

Your back arched as you came undone beneath him with a twitch. His thrusts became overwhelmingly quick as you continued to tremble below him, your hands traveling up to wrap around his neck. You felt him tense inside of you with a deep groan. He pulled out of you quickly, coming on your lower abdomen. He breathed heavily above you, his head hanging low. 

Your breathing matched his; your eyes traveling up to his as his gaze finally met yours. Your eyes connected only for a moment before he pushed himself off of you, standing up beside your bed as you continued to lay there breathlessly. With a snap of his fingers his clothes had completely reappeared, and with another snap, the mess on your stomach was completely gone. 

“Well,” He began, adjusting his collar, “I’ll see you tomorrow.” 

“What?” You questioned. 

He took another cigarette out of thin air, lighting it with his thumb, “You’ll see. Get some rest.” 

He began to walk off towards your window. Your eyelids grew heavy, you tried to fight back the sleep to see where he would go, but you felt the wave of sleep takeover you and within seconds you had fallen into a deep slumber. 

[clockwork-ashes]

Something Lonesome - Part I (a few times more)

Read also on Ao3 :)

Summary: Elain dies when she’s thrown into the cauldron, but she doesn’t stay dead for long. Over and over, again and again, something brings her back, and every time she finds her way to Lucien.

Note: This is a romance, but it’s also just a story about Elain. There will be a happy ending <3 Also, completely dedicated to the lovely @nocasdatsgay because I have so many ideas and every time I yell them into the tumblr void (the tags) she has something nice to say <3

Elain watched as Feyre’s blood flowed between the grooves of the stone tiles. Steady like a lazy river, just as mesmerising as the waters that danced in the Cauldron.

She heard the strangled moan Nesta made in response, a tortured, animalistic sound. The gag in her own mouth was soaked through with tears, damp as it cut into her cheeks. 

Rhysand howled in pain, almost as if the King of Hybern had taken a knife to his heart instead. Elain wished he had. 

Just as the soldiers hauled her into the air, she locked a terrified gaze onto the warrior whose eyes were made of sunlight. She felt as if she had seen them before, known them as surely as her reflection when she looked in the mirror. 

He took a measured step, purposeful. His broad hand was on the jewelled sword at his side, and Elain knew he would have been a sight to behold wielding the weapon. She was thrown into the whirling waves suddenly, pulled under by a force so strong, fighting against it would have been impossible. Darkness clouded her vision, but the map of a vicious scar lingered bright as day for the briefest of moments, lovely. 

* * *

“Put the prettier one in first,” the king said, his voice ringing from where he sat on his throne. Elain wanted to rip out his dark eyes, wished to feel skin and blood and tears beneath the crescent moons of her nails. 

Nesta hadn’t stopped fighting, and Elain hadn’t stopped shaking in fear. There was a part of her that knew there was an inevitability to it all, a sixth sense warning her not to even try. It felt deeply rooted, connected to her like a tree was to the ground it grew from. 

The red haired man spoke, tilting the world on its axis. His voice was as rich as melted gold, bright as the arrow of light Elain swore she saw arching towards her. “Stop this,” he said roughly, the demand echoing when no one listened.  

Elain could still hear the two simple words as she was shoved into the Cauldron, tripping over the edge of the ancient object, sinking until all she could see was darkness. 

* * *

Moonlight always looked like sunshine on the darkest nights, Elain knew. Each bright ray cutting across the sky, forcing all the stars to fade away. She liked how a path sometimes appeared over water, endless, not even stopping when it reached the horizon. When Elain had been a girl, she’d often wonder if there was a way to walk across the phantom bridge, could close her eyes and imagine it clear as glass. 

* * *

Elain went into the darkness willingly, knowing it like an old friend. 

Darling. 

Cold waters hugged her like welcoming hands, gentle. 

Stay. 

Only once, Elain wanted to know what might happen if she asked the darkness to wait. 

[dullgecko]

omfg you can't stop there with the neck-touching story, i'm so invested. the aftermath, i beg of you. did riz isolate himself/hide from his friends in shame after the fact? how did fabian react? did he blame riz? blame himself? were the bad kids able to coax riz back into the party after his self-imposed isolation?

Fabian had been completely blindsided by the sudden attack. Not literally, thank Cas, Rizs hands were small enough that he'd only torn up the half elfs cheek with his claws before stopping. As it was Fabian had felt him hit bone and had flinched away to cradle the sudden ragged hole in his cheek while the rogue hissed and put distance between them.

He felt Kristen's magic cut through the white hot pain after only a second. Flesh knitting back together in an instant and leaving no trace of the attack save for the heat on his skin and the blood in his mouth. He spat what was remaining onto the ground to join the pool of blood that had spilled there, turning his head when Kristen touched his face to let her check she hadn't missed anything.

"What the fuck The Ball. Claws are taking it a little far don't you think?" The half elf pushed himself to sit upright rather than remaining in his hunched position. His brief spike of anger at the attack fading when he noticed their rogue was gone.

"The Ball? Did anyone see where he went?"

There had been a quick search, each of them splitting up to go check his usual hiding spots in the house before reconvening in the living room. Adaine crouching to clean the blood off the carpet while Fig pulled out her crystal to see if they could find any clues.

She'd been recording while Fabian and Riz tousled on the floor, her cystal propped up on a side table as the teifling cheering Riz on. Whooping when he 'pinned' Fabian to the ground and settled into a cross legged position on his chest in victory. He had clearly been having fun, ears high and alert and tail flicking in a way they knew meant 'happy' as he mock clawed at Fabians face. He had his fingers curled in such a way that he was only batting their fighter in the face with his knuckles though so Fig was confused as to how Riz had clawed the half elf.

It had all happened so quickly that she'd assumed that Riz clawed him first THEN Fabian pinned him to the floor. The video showed otherwise though. Their rogue laughing even as their positions were flipped RIGHT up until the point Fabians completed the pin with his hand around the goblins throat.

The flip from smiling to terror had been almost instant, the video clear enough that they could see his pupils contract to slits even as he full force raked his claws across Fabians face. The goblin scrambling out of the cameras field of view when he was released. Thankfully they had still been recording even as everyone lept to check on Fabian where he was groaning on the floor. They could very audibly hear the front door slamming shut while Kristen was healing Fabian in the footage.

"Fuck dude did you kneel on his tail or something? I think you really hurt him."

Fabian shook his head, eye going wide as he watched the footage over Figs shoulder. A yawning pit of guilt opening in his stomach as she rewound it a few time to watch again and try and work out why Riz had flipped out. If he was hurt they needed to help him but he tended to hide injuries up until the point he couldn't function and they forced help on him.

"We need to go find him."

---------

Riz was in such a panic that he didn't have a plan beyond 'put distance between me and everyone else as fast as possible'. The door slammed shut behind him and he briefly contemplated booking it down the driveway but The Hangman was chasing pigeons about halfway down and Riz had just attacked its master.

He went right instead, rounding the side of the house to cut through the cemetery and find somewhere to hide. He'd never done something like this before and he was terrified. Both of himself because he couldn't remember the attack AND of the consequences.

Sure he'd nipped and scratched his friends before but he very rarely drew blood, and even then it was only usually a pinprick. He obviously hadn't held back this time, the evidence drying on his claws and face from where it had dripped on him before he scrambled free.

What would they think of him now? That he was as dangerous and violent as what people always said goblins were? Would they deal with him the same way they usually dealt with people that attacked them? He'd fled the house completely unarmed and he didnt even grab his briefcase before leaving. Hell, without his sword he didn't even have an advantage when hiding right now.

Riz stopped in the middle of the cemetery, crouching behind a large headstone just off the path so he could hide and collect his thoughts. The goblin whining as he tried to wipe the blood off his hand onto the grass but found that the vast majority of it had dried and wasn't coming free.

He realised he hadn't picked the best hiding spot but he couldn't muster the energy to care. Riz curling into a smaller ball and pressing his face against his knees, arms and tail alike looping around his ankles as he tried very hard to pretend he didn't exist anymore. So what if they found him, maybe he deserved whatever punishment they saw fit.

---------------

Riz wasn't sure how long he'd been sitting outside whe he heard the first footsteps approaching. He'd let himself retreat fully into his own mind as he tried to work out what exactly had happened and kept coming up empty. The rogue didn't even move when his crystal started ringing in his pocket, Fabian obviously trying to call him since he was the only person not set to mute.

Riz shifted to cover his head with his arms when the footsteps rapidly got closer, hoping to at least protect what he could if they were mad even if he didn't make an effort to run. The last time he clawed someone like this was in middle school and he'd spent weeks hiding the broken ribs from his mom after the kids friends had gotten their shots in.

"I've found him." He heard Fabian shout, though the sound was muffled with his arms shielding his head. The goblin whining and trying to curl up more when he felt hands gently try to pry his arms away.

"Riz? Fuck. Are you okay? I'm sorry. Hey..."

Riz relaxed slightly when the expected blows didn't come, letting the fighter untangle his arms and gently inspect his hand because it was still covered in dry blood. He did yank his tail away from his hand when he tried to inspect it as well though, tucking it up behind himself out of grabbing range and hissing into his own knees.

"Can you look at me? Are you hurt?"

Fabian still had a grip on both of his hands, thumbs pressing into his palms as he kneaded at the soft tissue there. Riz let him continue for a few more seconds before withdrawing his hands from his grip and wrapping them around his chest. Lifting his head to peek at the fighters concerned face which he was relieved was all in one piece.

"I'm sorry. I don't know what happened." Riz said quietly, dipping his ears back in show of contrition.

"What happened was you clawed the shit out of me." Fabian scoffed, reaching forwards to coax Riz to sit up further so he could see his face properly, the half-elf licking his thumb to try and get some of the dried blood off the goblins cheek. The act making Riz screw his face up in a way that made Fabian laugh. "I think it was my fault though. I apologise."

"What? No I attacked you I'm-" He froze, claws digging into his vest as the half elfs hand hovered close to his throat. Fabian making a face as if he'd just made a point before withdrawing carefully.

"No I'm quite sure it was my fault." Fabian shifted to sit next to the rogue instead, bringing a knee up to rest his arm on as he looked out over the cemetary. "Fig was filming and I can tell when someone gets triggered. My father used to get the same way sometimes... Do you think you're up to coming back inside?"

Riz shook his head, leaning forwards to hide his face against his knees again and sighing loudly. Leaning against Fabians side when his friend draped his arm over him and pulled him in to sit a little closer.

"Alright. I'll stay out here with you for a while then."

[cuteniaarts]

@katkastrofa, circa 40-ish hours ago: Hey, what if our newest bunch of OCs adopted a baby from one of the other brothel girls who knew she couldn’t afford to raise one? That would make for some fun shenanigans :D

Me, with a notoriously non existent sleep schedule, instinct of self preservation or concern for my poor wrist: Alright, bet. Watch how fast I can make you fall in love with this hypothetical baby >:)

Daneli as a gentle and loving caretaker-turned-adoptive-mother is something that can be So Personal, actually, and originally I was going to leave it at this quick sketch, but then I got carried away thinking about what this child will grow up to be like raised by this little gang of misfits, so…

Here she is!! A little older and so, so beautiful, I need more of her in my life immediately, she’s way too precious

And, because I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t also add a sapphic element to this absolute cinnamon roll, a small crack ship that I’m only half serious about for when she’s a little older still:

All in all, we may be getting impossibly far from canon, but I for one already cannot get enough of sweet darling Kumisai <3

(I fully drew three pieces from scratch in 9 hours I cannot feel my brain or my hands anymore send help)

[cerealbishh]

"When we head out to Whitefish, there won't be any turning back."

[killjoy-prince]

Yoosung's all done!

[letmetellyouaboutmyfeels]

The I feel like she sees me line being said to Eddie who is the person that truly sees Buck for all that he is. Are we supposed to take this line at face value which would indicate piss poor writing because they needed to rush to a horrible ending or do we take it as Buck being an unreliable narrator? What was the audience supposed to interpret from Buck saying that, were we truly supposed to believe him or we supposed to be pissed at Buck for saying this to the one person that truly sees Buck?

Good morning to me, I guess.

I'm assuming you haven't really seen people's reactions in the fandom on tumblr because I feel like I saw this said in quite a few posts going around, but you are absolutely not supposed to take this line at face value. I'm surprised that people think you should. 9-1-1 has from the beginning had a habit of turning friendships into romantic relationships (Bathena and Madney) and taking their time with these things rather than having an instalove situation. Even Karen and Hen, who meet when they're set up on a date together, don't instantly fall in love. I do not think they would set Eddie or Buck up for an endgame relationship with a woman by having them date that woman immediately, even if they didn't plan to make Buddie canon.

Buck is clearly struggling post-death. He's lost and once again looking for the answer from a romantic partner. He did a lot of growth in regards to his family relationships this season but not his romantic ones. Remember, his couch ended up destroyed and he asked his latest girlfriend to pick the new one out for him. Again. He's still not picking his own damn couch. After being unable to sleep on the one his mom gave him but passed out instantly on Eddie's where he ran to feel safe.

If people think this is all, somehow, an accident or the writers are doing this without knowing what they're doing, then I can't help you. Do you also think the symbolism I put into my fanfics are a total accident? Do you guys think I picked the name of the poem "Fuchsia Emerald Alizarin Rose" just because the colors are fun and they accidentally spell out F.E.A.R. or do you think maybe I did that absolutely 100% on purpose and was waiting for someone to realize?

Buck saying that to Eddie is 100% supposed to make the audience raise their eyebrows. Especially when we see Eddie's reaction. He's confused and he's hurt and he's annoyed. Eddie then spends his next few lines showing Buck (and us) that he sees Buck. Buck misses it, it goes right over his head, but the audience is shown that Buck is wrong and Eddie sees him.

I think there was a lot of internal stuff going on behind the scenes way high up the ladder that meant Buddie didn't happen this season. No, I don't mean that in a tinhatting way, I just mean that they knew Fox wouldn't renew them, they didn't know if they'd get picked up somewhere else, Fox hasn't promoted or cared about this show the way it has its other shows in a while, and I think it's pretty clear there was shuffling and changes going on with 6B. So I think things had to be put off. Similar to the pandemic, where I genuinely wonder what kind of season four we would've gotten if we'd had the full 18 episodes and hadn't had to work around Covid. I think that when we know there was a big shift going on behind the scenes, we need to have some grace and patience in how that will effect the story that's told on screen.

But I think that this default to "everything good we see on our screens is an accident and the writers are making shitty choices" is a horrible bad faith argument, and it's exhausting. Aren't you exhausted? I'm exhausted. Fandom shouldn't treat the writing and production team like their enemies any more than the writing and production team should treat the fans like their enemies in some kind of war they have to win (looking at you, GoT showrunners).

We are supposed to be annoyed that Buck is missing the point. We are supposed to see Buck's yearning to be a husband and a father, and how he's missing what's right in front of him. We are supposed to put two and two together and see that Eddie was hurt by Buck's words, that Eddie sees Buck, that Eddie is Buck's safe place, and that Eddie in that moment decided he might not have a chance with Buck and needs to move on, because previously we saw Eddie admit he wants romance again but he doesn't want to go out on dates, we saw his aunt say she met her husband through work, we saw him say 'we have time' and then we saw him immediately after Buck tells him about this new girl who "sees him" flee to visit his mother and then immediately actually try dating. On a meta level this is also because Eddie needs confidence in himself as a romantic partner and needs some more experience under his belt before he's ready to take the plunge with Buck, but in Eddie's mind, I think it's pretty clear he feels Buck will never want him back and he's trying to find the love he wants somewhere else, even if his heart is still Buck's.

So that's what I think. I think it's not explicitly spelled out for a few reasons, but frankly if one of them was a woman we wouldn't need it explicitly spelled out and personally I kinda like that it's not. Something that annoys me with M/F pairings is the constant "we all know you two like each other" talks from third parties that half the time aren't about the characters but are about the audience, to either tell the audience SEE THEY LIKE EACH OTHER THAT'S WHAT THIS IS ABOUT or to give the audience some fanservice while the characters aren't ready to get together. I don't need to be pandered to that way, thank you, so I'm a fan of the slightly more subtle approach that I, personally, see going on with Buddie.

If you or anyone else disagrees with me and feels it was just "piss poor writing" then that's entirely your right. I'd just appreciate it if people who feel that way would stop watching the show, and stop putting their complaints into the inboxes of people who clearly do enjoy the show.

TL;DR - You answered your own question, Buck is an unreliable narrator (and always has been) and we are supposed to be frustrated he said this to Eddie who has proven time and again (and does so in that very scene) that he sees Buck.