#like he’s always saying my personal life is seperate to my professional life and that’s true to some extent

[motogpnewbie]

Tik Tok decided to make me feel things today Pt1

[x-0ophelia0-x]

right person, wrong time.

Pairings: Ezra Bridger x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Dramaaa

word count: 2,3K

summary: Your boyfriend gets killed while you where on a mission, betrayed by your own. Just when you thought that you could never find love again, you meet Ezra. Everything seems to go back to normal, until you see him again.

authors note: this fic is based of @shining-nebula2000‘s idea! I hope you like it 😭 should be proof read now. Also, I kinda forgot that you can’t really bleed out because of blaster fire while writing this-

never the less, here’s some dramaaa

Not as much as I originally planned to but anywayyy

enjoy <3

Hysio Asteen

Beloved son, friend and partner

Ever since that day you questioned yourself if you’d be able to love anyone else ever again.

If you’d be able to feel the happiness he provided for you.

If you’d be able to see the light and embrace it’s warmth the same again.

If you’d be able to move on, knowing that your lover‘s life was cut short due to the actions of someone who betrayed the Rebellion. 

You were out on a mission which escalated quickly. 

Hysio, your partner, had to steal some important blueprints from the empire. You two were accompanied by your teammates, ensuring your safety throughout your risky mission,

But one of them had to betray you, one of them had to raise his blaster when Hysio ran back, aiming for his heart and pulling the trigger. Ending his life just because the empire seemed more promising, safer and stronger.

Your teammates took care of him while you were petrified. 

„Hysio!“

You screamed out his name in pure shock, seeing how his body fell down. His breath was rapid, his hand trying to put pressure on the wound but nothing could save him right now. He’d die if he didn’t get any professional medical attention now. 

You ran to him, kneeling down beside him, holding him close while your tears blurred your vision. Trying to add the pressure he held over his wound with your hands, but it was too much. You couldn’t give him the medical attention he needed right now, his wound was to severe and his immense blood loss added a factor to his low survival chances.

„you.. you have to go“

He tried to say, his voice weakening more and more with every passing second. In his other hand was a stick, the one he had put the blueprints on.

He gave the stick to you, knowing that the rebellion needed those blueprints.

„you need to finish what we started.. please..“

His voice trembled, due to his pain but also him knowing that he’d die… leaving you alone.

„No!!.. you can’t ask this from me..! I-I won’t let you- I can’t let you die here!“

You cried even more, looking at him knowing that your time with him was running out. His eyes still held the same kindness for you, even in his last moments he tried his best to calm you down.

„I don’t regret anything in my life.. thanks to you“

He continued while you protested. Taking in his features, making sure that you wouldn’t ever forget his face. Just as you tried to tell the others to help you carry him to your shuttle, the sound of multiple footsteps filled your ears.

„you got to hurry..! They’re coming“

He said, his voice even weaker now. 

Everything that happened after that was blurry. Your teammates rushed to you, seperating you from him. You managed to share your last kiss with him before they dragged you away, running away from the incoming stormtroopers. 

„Hysio!.. I love you!“

You yelled as you turned your head for one last time, locking gazes with his dying form. He then smiled after hearing your words, using all of his remaining strength to yell back.

„I love you too y/n!.. I always will..!“

-

Two years passed since that day. The blueprints indeed helped the Rebellion a lot. They helped us to find weaknesses in imperial transporters, making it easier to attack them, getting our crates with much lesser losses then before. 

Your boyfriends sacrifice saved a lot of lives. Princess Leia Organa even appeared in his funeral. 

His death left you emotionally shattered. His dying form a constant element of your nightmares. Reminding you of that day.

Due to your former teammates betrayal which led to Hysios death, you needed some time to regain the ability to trust someone again. And that day eventually came. 

You were reassigned to the ghost crew. Being spectre seven, living in the ghost and also helping them on their missions. It wasn’t easy at first but they gave you the time and space you needed, never pushing you too far.

Just when you thought that you could never let anyone else in your heart again, you met him.

Ezra Bridger, Padawan of Kanan Jarrus, offered you his help to get more control over your dreams. You had told the crew about your nightmares since you basically woke Sabine up every night. Sharing a cabin with you was rough at the start.

You hesitated at first but then accepted it, letting him help you, trusting him a little bit more then the rest of your newfound family. 

And somehow you felt at ease again, at peace. Ever since you spent more time with him you seemed happier, that the walls you slowly built up started to fade away.

You didn’t want to replace Hysios special place in your heart with someone else, but you couldn’t reject Ezra neither. 

He made you happy again, helped you when you were at your worst and he even accepted the fact that you needed time to let someone else in your heart again. 

Hysios death broke you but Ezra somehow managed to fix you.

So you decided to again open up your heart for someone. You couldn’t stay this way forever, you had to move on and Ezra was the one who showed you that it was possible. Letting you feel the warmth of the light you fought for again.

You were a couple now, spending even more time together then before, going out to watch the night sky and count stars, to play with loth cats, fight against imperial inquisitors, collecting new helmets for Ezra’s silly collection, fly together to missions and having your little moments. 

Most of your activities where considered normal couple activities, one of them being to watch the night sky with him, falling asleep on his shoulder when you, again, forgot about the time. This one was your absolute favorite.

-

You two were separated for a mission. Ezra was with Kanan and the others on the Phantom while you were with Hera on the Ghost.

When they successfully stole more crates, they flew back to Atollon, where you and Hera waited for them.

You didn’t notice the person who was observing you from afar. 

The shadow that sneaked into the base, looking for one person. You.

When you saw the Phantom docking to the Ghost you ran to the ramp, waiting for Ezra to come out. And so he did. The ramp opened, revealing your boyfriend. 

The person that followed you started to walk towards you. He’d recognize you anywhere. Just when he was near enough for you to hear him if he’d talk to you, he froze. His heart skipping a beat when he saw how you ran towards the boy from the ship. Engulfing him into a tight embrace while you two shared a kiss. 

„How did it go?“

You asked.

„Like always“

Ezra answered nervously, bringing up his arm against his face, looking to the side. You took the hint that he was hiding something, or even better, didn’t want to admit something.

„hmmm.. always as in ‚we got in trouble but managed to flee always‘“?

You grinned, bringing up your hand to his chin, slowly turning his face back to yours so that you could see him better. 

„okay you’re right.. chopper had to navigate us back.. it was risky“

He admitted, not amused since he had to tell her that they were saved by chopper. This droid‘s ego grew even bigger since this happened.

„But it wasn’t my fault this time!.. Sabine decided to leave an artwork behind which slowed us down when the stormtroopers arrived.“

He added, not wanting to admit that it was also kind of his fault because he forgot to tell them that they were coming after he chased one down for his helmet. He wouldn’t tell her this detail tho, not even Kanan knows about this.

„What the.. fuck“

Your heads turned to the direction you heard the voice from. 

It was a deep and strained voice, but it was familiar to you. When you looked at the person infront of you, your eyes widened in shock and disbelief. 

It was him. Hysio. 

„H-Hysio..“

You whispered, the amount of disbelief evident in your voice.

„how.. you.. y-you died..?“

You were tense, not knowing what to feel right now as you felt multiple emotions at once. Ezra noticed it, you told him everything about him and how you thought that he died. Your mental state was destroyed and it took you long enough to even feel happiness again.

„well.. I didn’t…“

His voice was different. He still had his characteristic undertone but right now.. the only thing it did was to send a shivers down her spine.

„After you left and the troopers arrived, they took me to some medical facility. I don’t even know what they did but it saved my life…“

You were speechless. All this years and he was alive. While you thought that you had lost him forever. 

„.. at some point I wished that they would���ve let me die that day.. the things they did.. they wanted information about everyone and everything, they noticed that I wouldn’t tell them a thing and decided to use other methods.“

His voice seemed like as if he was holding something back. Some words came out through gritted teeth, you also noticed how his arm was trembling.

„..the mere thought of you gave me the strength I needed to survive that and to escape this hell at some point. Spending months to find you… just to find out..“

He now was looking at Ezra and something in his eyes twitched, the small amount of softness that they held earlier was replaced by anger and disgust.

„.. Just to find you kissing some other bastard?!“

He yelled the last part, his anger now completely on display. The look on his face while he looked at Ezra was one you never saw on him before. As if he’d be ready to kill him right now. Your were left speechless, not knowing what to do. 

Ezra once again noticed your unease, tightening his grip around you.

„She thought that you were dead.. there was a funeral that even Princess Leia attended to..“

He tried to say, but he also didn’t find the right words right now. 

„So the best thing she could do was betray me?!“

Hysio was furious, not caring at all if others heard him yell. 

„I-I didn’t.. I-„

„You what?! Saw me die and chose to let him steal you from me?!“

Hysio cut her off, stepping closer to them with each word.

„Hey! Let’s try and talk about this without th-„

„I don’t have anything to talk with you about! As for you“

His gaze moved to yours, seeing how you clinged on Ezra, tears ready to fall. 

„I didn’t think that it’d be so easy for you to forget what we had“

„Hysio.. please don’t do this..!“

You cried, not believing what was happening right now. 

„I guess I was wrong about you.“

He then turned to leave, not wanting to look at your eyes ever again. Murmuring something under his breath that was just loud enough to be heard by you.

„Can’t believe I did all of this for a fucking whore“

And something within Ezra then snapped. Even if this guy was your former boyfriend, he had no right to call you like that, and seeing how you reacted when you heard his words, it was his turn to be angry now. 

So he did what he did the best. Disobeying Kanan‘s order to not let his emotions get the best of him.

He ran to him and just when Hysio turned around, facing him, it was too late. 

He punched him straight to his face.

„Don’t you ever dare to disrespect her like that!“

Ezra yelled, ready to hit him again. But Zeb was faster, after seeing what was going on and how Ezra made sure that this guys teeth would need a dentist, he ran to him, holding his arm just before he could land another hit.

„Calm down boy.. even if he deserves that.. you shouldn’t waste your strength on him“

Hysio at the other hand didn’t care and lunged towards Ezra, punching him at his abdomen while both he and Zeb were taken aback by the sudden attack. Sabine then rushed to tackle Hysio down, holding him still while she waited for help to come. 

„You fucking asshole! You stole her.. you fucking stole her from me!“

„Can you even imagine how broken she was?! She needed over a year to openly talk to anyone here! I tried to help her.. she is happy again, I didn’t ‚steal‘ her! And.. I love her alright?!“

Hysio broke down, not believing what he was going through right now.

Zeb then let go of Ezra, letting him walk back to you while he helped Sabine holding Hysio back. You were still shocked, walking towards Ezra, hugging him while you hid your face into his neck, wanting to disappear right now.

He returned the hug, placing his hand to the back of your head, holding you gently, trying to calm you down.

„It’s going to be alright..“

While you still tried to calm down after your encounter with Hysio, he on the other hand was brought to a cabin, all alone. Sabine and Zeb hoped that it’d calm him down, but little did they know what was going on in his mind.

As much as he wanted to hate you right now.. he couldn’t. 

He still loved you.. and that’d never change.. as much as he tried to right now.

[clouds-rambles]

hi bestie!! i loved the prompt you wrote where the reader dies in the genshin boys arms,, so do you think you could do that for zhongli and xiao? :]

We about to cry again huh?

Bro Stormbearers Lair is making me sad and for what? All I’m doing is looking for chests. Bruh. Kinnie moment

Pairing(s); (Seperate) Zhongli, and Xiao x reader

Warnings; major character death, angst, hurt/no comfort, injury description, blood

Keep reading under the cut!

Zhongli

He had lost many a person over the millennia, so loss isn’t exactly foreign to the ex archon

But you, even if you were mortal. In Zhongli’s eyes you would grow old with him. You would get to see your children grow into adults, you would get to see grand children, maybe you would even get to see great grand children if you were lucky.

But no

Your body lays limp in Zhongli’s arms. You were both fighting a particularly tedious foe, like you have done some many times before. But this time ended with you dying

And Zhongli didn’t even get to say his goodbyes to you for he was too preoccupied with putting down the enemy. Like has happened so many times before, people close to him, gone without even a goodbye let alone a kiss on the cheek

It had happened with Guizhong too. One day she was there fighting beside him and the next. Gone

Zhongli finds himself doing something that he hasn’t done in a very long time. He cries. He cries for you. Your loss of life, for your loss of experience. For all those years he was going to spend with you. For all those years that he did spend with you that are going to be nothing but a painful memory that he has to dwell on to remember why he’s alive

How would he explain it to his children? Children that are certainly not going to understand why one of their parents are gone. Especially when the said parent is used to being gone for long periods of time? How would he explain this to himself? That the person he loves above all things has been taken away?

Hu Tao is funnily enough the one to find Zhongli dry sobbing in the middle of the plains. She says something about how she was in the area, but really? Hu Tao had this sudden gross gut feeling, as if your spirit was trying to call out to her. The gross gut feeling she had was right

Hu Tao suddenly ever so professional helped the broken Zhongli up. She doesn’t mention it when his trousers are stained by your blood, nor does she mention Zhongli’s wet face. Hu Tao knows better, especially when dealing with the dead.

The service is as small as it could physically be, considering that just in Liyue you and he have made so many friends that want to say goodbye

Both Zhongli and his children are so overwhelmed with emotion that none of them cry at the service. But everyone knows how they’re feeling. 

After the service Zhongli sits his kids down and tries to explain everything to them without crying. He must stay strong for his beautiful children, he wont let himself crutch onto them.

Often when the kids are tucked away happily in bed Zhongli will visit your grave. Often with flowers, it doesn’t matter which ones. You always had a way of finding beauty in even the weeds that litter both the garden and the wilds

On more than one occasion Zhongli has found Xiao and Ganyu silently saying goodbye to you. In all honesty you were the reason why the human adepti started seeing the ex-archon in the first place. It’s only right they offer their blessings to the person who bought them closer to the only father figure they have

As the years pass your loss has gotten easier. Zhongli still visits your grave often and occasionally brings the kids to say hello. 

Though Hu Tao cannot help but note that Zhongli still wears his wedding ring on his finger. And sometimes, she can catch glimpses of what she can only presume to be your wedding ring hanging around his neck.

Zhongli isn’t going to be letting your memory within him die anytime soon

Xiao

Having a mortal lover really wasn’t the best plan for Xiao. But he had always pictured at least you getting old. That way it would be less painful for the adeptus to let you go.

But fate obviously didn’t want that for him

He should have been more careful about having you near. You had helped him open up, so much so displays of PDA were something that he really began to enjoy. Holding your hand as you wonder about Wangshu’s market stalls, or kissing each others cheeks just when you feel like it

That’s what must have enticed the Abyss to target you. While you were defenseless

It was just a night like any other. Xiao had decided to go out for some monster slaying. He had noticed a slowly growing presence and generally a night out slaying monsters cleared out the area for a week or two

And it was going great until he heard the bloodcurdling scream of his name. If Xiao wasn’t a lightning fast adepti the scream of his name alone would have caused him to cry

The scene as he entered your room was much worse

The first thing he notices is the smell of the elemental traces of the abyss, but that smell is quickly overpowered by a metallic smell Xiao has become more than acquainted over in his lifetime. Blood

They you are lead on your bed, somewhere that should have been a safe space for both you and Xiao by extension

“Xiao” you speak again between laboured breaths, he is by your side in an instant, he clasps your hand in his

“Tell me who, I’ll ki-” he says before you interrupt

“shh” you shush with a weak smile “Xiao, I’ll” you pause coughing “I’ll find you in my next life, I promise” you manage to say

“[name], [name] stay with me!” Xiao yells as he begins to shake your body. It’s obvious from your glassy eyes and lack of breath that you’re not going to

Xiao leaves Goldet to clean up the room of blood, and you as he tracks down the culprit of your demise

He eventually does. But Xiao realises that much time has passed since your death. How long had he been pursuing this abyss herald? Days? Weeks?

When Xiao returns to Wangshu Goldet almost hugs him exclaiming that she and her husband had been worried sick. They had almost come to the conclusion that he to had taken his own life

“How long have I been gone?” Xiao inquires

“Four months” Goldet responds “We tried to hold [name]’s funeral back as much as we could, but we buried them three months ago. I’m sorry Xiao”

The adepti shakes his head. A million thoughts race his mind as he ponders what he should do next. Visit the grave and make himself be lost in your memory? Or just bury you in his head like he had done with the yaksha during the war?

He settles on both

Xiao visits your grave and says his goodbyes. He sets up some incense to help your spirit rest if its in turmoil before he turns to leave your grave. Your memory is like a wound. He will bury it in the sand like all the others in due time

A hundred years later is when he visits your grave again. Not because he forgot to before. But because this wound of your memory has infected his brain. In the last decade your memories have resurfaced once more

The memories range from the first time the two of you shared a kiss, shared the bed to when he had reached you in the bedroom

Xiao wonders to the promise your dying breaths offered, were they an empty promise like all other dying breaths? Or was this a true one?

“You know I’ve been tending to this grave for the last decade or so” a voice behind Xiao speaks. “My name isn’t [name] but I think I am them” the voice continues standing just behind the yaksha

“A hundred years is a little long for you to have grown” Xiao tells the figure behind him. You hum

“I think I was blessed by the gods” you confess “For I am truly a century old”

[wakatvshi]

Hey! I saw that you receive requests so.. I would love some marley warriors + jean (because i love him) with an s/o who's really.. Touchy, please? Could be headcanons or imagines🥺 thank you so so much! 😭

Yeah! I would love to! They’re kind of rambling but I hope you like them and that this is what you wanted! I didn’t do Annie because I just couldn’t really figure out what to write about her but if you really want her send a seperate message and I’ll give you annie with a touchy s/o!

Heads up though I’ve never written or read for Zeke before because he’s not personally a favorite so I hope he’s okay in this! 

JEAN KIRSTEIN ══▸

Jean would LOVE a touchy s/o. He’s a very touchy person himself so having someone who’s as touchy as he is would make him so happy. 

When the two of you are alone he’s all about touching you and always wants to be touching you. When you’re working on something and he can’t be touching you all the time he’ll sit next to you or as close to you as he can be and just be near you. Which helps you both because you’re a touchy person. 

Something both of you love is when you’re sitting in his lap, just doing whatever you’ve been doing. He’ll walk in and you’ll give grabby hands and want to be held and he’ll want to hold you. Doesn’t matter what gender/size anything he wants to have you in his lap and it makes him happy. 

In public, he’s more shy about touching because he’s actually a huge baby and his ‘flirty’ persona that some people think he has is 100% real. He wants to act like he’s smooth but he’s not. He’ll hold your hand and walk with you in public but anything more it’s not going to be him initiating it.

If you’re with him in public and you want more affection than holding hands then you’ll have to do it and he will turn bright red and stutter if he’s supposed to be talking. It’s adorable and he’s so happy even if he’s bright red. 

Another one of his favorite things is you playing with his hair, it turns into a big puddle when you play with his hair and when you compliment him in basically anyway.

If any of his friends catch him being super cute or you being cute with him (aka Sasha and Connie) they’ll laugh and tease him and he’ll get defensive but doesn’t actually mind it. Even if he did you’d just hug him from behind or wrap your arms around him and he’s glaring at them but also super focused on the attention he’s now getting. 

Sleeping with Jean is basically a cuddle fest as well, thankfully for you he’s touchy as well so when you both wake up tangled in each other neither of you really mind it. 

BERTHOLDT HOOVER ══▸

Bertholdt with a touchy s/o would be so good for him but also something that he has to get used to. 

Eventually he finds out that he loves it but at first he doesn’t expect it. He’s very shy and stand-offish even if he doesn’t mean to be. So any physical affection for the most part will have to be done by you. Even years into your relationship you’ll have to be the one who makes the moves. 

The first time you initiate any kind of touch he goes bright red and has no idea how to react. Outside he’s frozen and staring at you, sweating a little. Inside of course he’s beyond happy and he wants nothing more than to move and do the same, he wants to hold onto you too. He wants to touch you and be affectionate but he doesn’t know how. It isn’t until you try to move away that he finally acts and grabs your hand.

Even years into your relationship most of the affection will be initiated by you so it is a good thing that you’re not afraid to be the one who reaches out for him. It also brings him out of his shell quite a bit. 

When the two of you are alone he loves the affection you give him. He doesn’t know how to ask for the affection he wants but he does give small signals and you know him well enough to reach out and grab his hands or crawl in his lap. 

PDA is a no go for him completely, he’s obviously a shy person and being super affectionate is outside of his comfort zone as it is so adding anything else would just be far outside his comfort zone

I also do feel like physical affection is his love language so him having the freedom to act on that and having someone who wants that affection like he does would make him so happy. 

Sleeping with Bertholdt is always a fun experience. You might start holding into him or him holding onto you but you’ll end up in a dozen different positions before you wake up.You’ve got no real say in how you sleep when you’re with him.  

REINER BRAUN ══▸

Literally a teddy bear and would LOVE to have an affectionate s/o. Needs an affectionate s/o. 

Reiner feels unlovable, he feels worthless and he is very depressed and I’m by no means saying you can fix him or fix anyone like that, but affection is everything to this man even if he doesn’t think he deserves it. 

You’ll have to be the one to make the first move for the first time but as soon as he realizes how much you do love affection he’ll be happy to initiate as well. Sometimes he’ll surprise you by being the one to reach out and hold you first. 

Obviously you love that, you’ll just be doing something and possibly not even paying attention to him and Reiner will be the one to walk up and wrap his arms around you and just stand there. 

To him affection is proof of love and comfort that he desperately needs. It would take him a little to get used to at first im sure, he’s not used to it like his mother isn’t very affectionate but he craves it. 

With Reiner it’s easy to be touchy. Even in public he doesn’t mind, he’s more in awe of the fact that you want to be seen with him and want to give affection.

He’s not super huge on over the top PDA but he does love holding your hand or kissing your cheek. Also piggy back rides, I can see him being a fan of that because it’s touch and that’s what he loves and craves.

Sharing a bed with Reiner is always the two of you tangled in each other. He likes to be the big spoon and likes to hold you but he’s 100% okay with you holding him, sometimes he even prefers that. 

Reiner needs to feel loved and affection is the best way to do that in his mind. So being touchy would be perfect.

PORCO GALLIARD ══▸

To me Porco is literally the embodiment of “disgusting. do it again.”

Now not because he’s not a fan of affection but he has this cool guy persona that he puts on around people. He wants people to see him as the tough guy when it’s only half true. You can see it with the kids that he’s actually a super affectionate guy. 

Porco needs validation and having an s/o who’s super touchy would give him that. When you’re touching him he feels like he’s number one. He’s your main focus and it means the world to him. Of course he’d never tell you that. 

You’ll have to be able to read him a little to be able to tell when he wants something because he’s stubborn and sometimes it takes a lot for him to ask you for something if he’s not sure how. 

Now if he’s just in the mood to be affectionate himself he’s good with just holding you or grabbing your hand. He’s also big in kissing, he loves kissing but usually he tries to make it more suggestive or almost casual. 

For just cuteness you’ll have to be the one who holds his face and kisses him or who just holds his hand or hugs him. He has to lean the importance of cute nonsexual affection. 

PDA to him makes him blush a little also super proud that you’re the one on his arm and he wants to show you off and loves that you want to show him off. Being the “most important” to you is important to him. 

When Porco sleeps he’ll sleep holding you for a few minutes but he’s not one who likes to hold onto someone when he sleeps. Biggest surprise when sleeping with him is that Porco LOVES to be the little spoon. He’ll deny it with his dying breath but he adores it. 

Also random cutsey headcanon for Porco that will never leave my head is that Porco loves when you baby talk to him. I have no reason for this hc but I just feel like he would love it. 

PIECK FINGER ══▸

A queen of physical affection honestly. Lives for it and lives to give it. 

She’s in her titan form a lot and when she’s finally out of it she has trouble walking on two legs so you being there for her to lean on when she’s not walking with her crutch and just actually physically supporting her would mean the world to her. 

She also likes that you want to be affectionate with her after being in her titan form for so long. she wants to be held and wants her hair played with. If you let her just lay in your lap and play with her hair or hold her hand she’ll be the happiest woman in the world. 

A lot of your affectionate time is spent with you both laying or sitting somewhere together. If you’re giving her attention or letting her give attention she’s loving it. 

Another thing she loves is walking around with you, she doesn’t shy away from PDA. If you’re together and if you want to kiss her cheek or something she’s more than happy about it. She’ll laugh softly and get the faintest of pink on her cheeks

She does have to make sure that she’s professional about it because she is a warrior and has to keep up her professional persona. 

Of course, you’ll have people who are beyond jealous watching her with you and honestly she thinks it’s kinda cute that people are jealous because to her it doesn’t make sense. 

Sleeping with Pieck is just cuddle city for both of you. She likes to be hold and be held and you’re happy to do both as well. There’s nothing either of you like better than the intimacy and connection that the two of you have laying there and holding each other. 

ZEKE YEAGER ══▸

This man takes a while to get used to physical affection. He’s not really had affection before so you’ll have to work at it.

When he was younger he didn’t have much affection, we know that grandfather spends a great amount of time in the hospital for mental issues and we saw from how they raised Grisha that they’re not super affectionate.

His life has mostly been spent working towards his goals and trying to do what he could to make sure he could complete the goals. So he’s not really put much attention to romantic relationships. 

Having you be super affectionate would for sure throw him off a bit but he’s good at hiding that. I do think once he was used to it, he’d just lean into your touches and want to stay there. 

He doesn’t like PDA at all, he’s the captian of the warriors and he’s respected even by some of the people of Marley. So it is hands off in public. He will walk close to you though, if your arms are brushing and you’re close to him he is happy. 

Alone though he does love affection. You playing with his hair is a good one but what he really loves is getting massages from you. He works hard and if you’ll just stand behind him rubbing his shoulders and kissing the top of his head he’s the happiest man ever. 

When you’re sleeping Zeke is 100% big spoon. He wants to hold you, if you want he’ll let you hold him but he’s most comfortable when he’s able to hold you. That’s when he shows his real affectionate side. He wants you close to him, and he loves holding you. He feels like he can rest when you’re in his arms. 

[softrozene]

ASL’s Reaction to S/O’s Gen Z Personality

@senkuwu-chan​ requested: Hello, I saw your requests were open and decided to send one in! Can I request for ASL (seperately) whose s/o is a Gen z person? Ofc it's in op universe but the reader is says stuff like "trauma adds ✨the spice✨ to the life" and would laugh and talk about all their harshest times like 😀✌🏼. The s/o basically has dark and sarcastic humour. How would ASL react to them being like that etc? I'm so sorry if this was confusing, it's okay if you don't do it!! Btw I hope you have a great day 💕

When I tell you- This request made me so happy because I can relate to it. I love this so much and sorry for taking forever to get to it! Thank you for requesting it and I hope you have a great day!

**Uh I know some people get really serious when it comes to years and who is what generation and stuff so let me say that this is mainly for Gen Z and is labeled as that (and obviously not everyone has the same personality type and humor) but I do get that millennials can be like this so yeah have fun reading!

Ace, Sabo, Luffy x Reader (Gender Neutral/Non-Binary)

Warnings: Comedy, Fluff, I am tired so probably grammar issues

Words: 573

Portgas D. Ace-

After a particularly harsh/stressful moment in your life Ace was there to witness you say

“If this day does not take me out of this world I will-“

The morbid words do not match your face and since it is the first time he has witnessed you like that he is just frozen

Ace’s initial reaction is “what the actual fuck”

He is genuinely concerned at first

Like should he go get a professional to help you? Are you okay? Then once you explain to him that you cope with life in your own humor, he will try to understand more

Though it is extremely difficult for him to not be concerned

Especially if this poor boy is having one of his own down days and you give him this kind of pep talk:

“Listen, child, you need to take care of yourself. You deserve happiness and I will always happily destroy my own if it means you can pursue your dreams because you deserve it”

He lowkey keeps Marco and Thatch in on your humor in case he decides out of nowhere that yeah- That is not normal

Overall, I feel like Ace would 100% understand this humor but because of how serious (in certain situations) and overprotective of his loved ones he is he needs to adjust to it

If you have the willpower you can get him to start having the humor too and team up with your morbid humor

Reader self-destructs themselves in order for their partner and friends to succeed in life

Sabo-

If you so much as say you will end yourself over something dramatic, he will be flabbergasted

For example, if you say, “Thank you universe- My time has finally come and I can be free of this cruel world” or if someone gets hurt in battle and you just stop to say, “Fucking same” or “God I wish that was me.”

Sabo is like “No baby! Is you good?!”

You know that SpongeBob meme? If not let me put it here:

Yeah, that is you and Sabo

And poor baby would not understand your dark humor and would be so genuinely concerned

You can try and get him used to it, but he will always awkward laugh and just keep an eye out for you

Overall- You would probably make Sabo the more protective partner as he tries to find a cure to your dark humor ldjfaklsda

Monkey D. Luffy-

The only thing I have for Luffy is that he is with you 100% and would laugh constantly

It does not matter if you are serious (because even in serious situations he laughs)

He would just laugh with you unless you quite literally spell it out that you would rather be six feet under the ground than deal with pirates and marines alfdjasl

HOWEVER- I do have one more point to make out- Since reader has a Gen Z personality, they would get Luffy to call Garp a boomer

YOU CAN PORTRAY YOUR HUMOR TO LUFFY AND HE WILL JUST ACCEPT IT

Much like Robin (who would literally be a millennial and encourage your humor since she relates)- Luffy is just like- Oh they are always like that or

“Aren’t they funny?”

All he cares about is that you are his partner, and he laughs at your jokes even if to others they are not funny and want you to get help

[miawin6]

I recently read the book Alias Grace by Margaret Atwood and here is my unprofessional opinion on it.

There are three main theories about Grace and the story she narrates to us and Dr. Jordan

First theory is that Grace was possessed by the spirit of Mary Whitney who forced her to help and influence McDermott in the murder of Mr. Kinnear and Nancy Montgomery. This is emphasized by the fact that Grace mentions how she did not open the window of the room in which Mary died.

Second theory is that Grace suffered from dissociative personality disorder and her alter took the form of Mary Whitney and the alter was the one who committed the murder.

And the final theory is that Grace was lying to Dr. Jordan about not having any memory and that she and Jeremiah the peddler orchestrated the whole possessed thing to get Grace acquitted.

I find the first theory to be the least plausible. Personally, I believe in the second theory the most because the clues woven into the storyline fits perfectly with the theory.

Grace Marks was raised in an abusive home. Her father forced her to do all the work and take care of her siblings after her mother died. He was physically, verbally and even sexually abusive to her. People with DID are the ones who have undergone with repititive abuse at a young age and so their brain forms alters as a coping mechanism.

Grace mentions that Mary was the only good thing in her life and the time she had spent with her was the happiest of her life. Mary was not only a friend to Grace but also a great influencer. Mary was older than Grace and taught her everything she knew. She even took care of Grace when she got her first period and even gave her her red petticoat which Grace kept with her till the end. Grace admired Mary and looked up to her. So when she died, Grace lost her biggest support system and was left all alone in a cruel world.

Grace saw Mary as a light in the dark, as a saving grace in a harsh world so it is no wonder her alter would take the form of Mary. Alters share the pain the body of a person with DID feels and the form taken by alters are sometimes the ones the person is influenced by in some way.

Grace was also deeply influenced by the superstition that closed windows do not allow spirits to escape. The day Mary died, Grace lost consciousness for some time and her fellow maids mentioned that she had woken up and had pretended to be Mary. It is possible that it was the alter who had fronted during that time. Grace has no recollection of it.

There are many times when Grace suffers from amnesia, especially a few days before the murder and during the day of the murder . Amnesia is a major symptom of DID. The brain creates amnesiac walls that seperates the memories of the alters from each other. This gives the theory of Grace having DID even more substance.

When Jeremiah puts Grace in a trance and Mary reveals herself to the people in the room, her voice is altered and her manner of speaking is also different. People with DID do get different accents and voices when different alters front.

This is the theory that seems most plausible to me as well as to Dr. Jordan who mentions reading the case of a person in Frace who claimed to have multiple personalites.

But the final theory seems to have some merit as well. Firstly, Grace did have a motive to kill Nancy. She was pregnant with her employer's baby just like Mary. However, instead of suffering for it like Mary did, Nancy was contentedly living in the house wearing dresses and jewellery above her status. Nancy also was always jealous of Grace and treated her unfairly whenever Mr. Kinnear interacted with Grace.

Grace had a great reason to lie to Dr. Jordan and tell him a fake story where she was always the victim. She had been stuck in the prison since she was 16 and a report written by Dr. Jordan in her favour would go a long way in acquitting her.

There was a line in the book in which Grace wonders as to how to make her story more interesting to keep Dr. Jordan's attention. She also says that she would tell Dr. Jordan what he wishes to hear. These lines irked me a little. If Grace was truly innocent like she claimed she was, why would she try to make her story interesting. An interesting story does not equate to a true story. It is a possibility that she spun an entire tale just to gain Dr. Jordan's favour.

There is also not much evidence about the existence of Mary Whitney and not much proof of her relation with Grace Marks.

Grace could have orchestrated the possession with Jeremiah who is known to as a scammer and an accomplished impersonator. He was always sympathetic towards Grace and ready to provide her with the help whenever she needed. He even offered to take her along with him as a partner-in-crime in his various travellings.

There is also the fact that the entire story that Grace tells Dr. Jordan is told to us in first person. We do not see the story from an outside perspective or from a third person point of view. While the book is from a third perspective when the present time is going on, the books shifts to first person perspective whenever Grace is telling her story. We only hear Grace's side of the story. That makes her an unreliable narrator. She could have added any lie into her story and we would be none the wiser and with no proof to call her out.

In the end, however, I truly liked Grace's character. I put my money on the second theory because I want to believe Grace was a good person who just got caught in bad situations. This was just my opinion on the story and if you do not agree with it, that is completely fine. Thanks for reading. Have a nice day!

I would also like to add that I don't personally suffer from DID. I just have read a lot about it. I don't mean to assume or generalize people with DID. If I have said something harmful in this post, then I truly apologize. I am not a medical professional and this is not some kind of diagnosis. If a fact mentioned in this post is wrong or stereotypically harmful, please feel free to call me out in the comments. This is just a rant about a book I love and I had absolutely no intentions to hurt anyone.

[xo-alie-xo]

PORTWELL LONG GAME OR RINA SLOWBURN.

You can only choose one poison.🍷

Listen up my Wildcats.🐱

We all ship each character with happiness. No matter how much you love to hate them, a majority of us simply adores the characters and want the best for them. Then comes relationships and it's okay to ship our favorites.⛴

I'm a diehard Rina shipper and I know in my heart that they are series endgame. The set up, the natural chemistry, their mutual understanding, the surprises and angst literally put me on chokehold. So I'm 100% a Rina shipper till the end. I'm here for the slowburn and their development rather than one shots. They are worth the pain. 😭❤

Let me start with Ricky Bowen now.

Ricky shouldn't to be with Gina because he's hurting her mentality. He's not insensitive on purpose. Like when he tried to stop Big Red from telling her his message to Nina because he KNOWS it'll hurt her.

If you think, that Ricky didn't understand clearly when Gina confessed, think again. He shushed her. Kept their thing a secret from everyone. He knows he feels some type of way and she feels something too. But this boy is so used to safeguarding his childhood norms and has very little adaptability. Hence, he pretended to ignore everything between them because his home stability was falling apart and he clinged on to Nina, his constant childhood love.

He's a traumatised 16-17 year old boy that needs to heal and grow. This episode was heartbreaking because he had to accept that he had to let Nina go because their once upon a time fairytale had become toxic.

People change. I'm not the same person I was when I was 16 lmao. Being together as childhood lovers means growing together and accepting each other's growth. Which Ricky couldn't. He clutched to the idea of Nini. Even his love confession. It was sooo sweet but all he did was focus on their history.

This boy needs time to heal and maybe seek professional therapy. It would be so DAMN HISTORIC if Disney decides to take psychological issues seriously and show how he's dealing with his anxiety, pills and psychotherapy. He needs to breathe before he can be with any girl for that matter. He's hurting and isn't trying to hurt anyone on purpose. Including Gina.

Him asking her for advice on Nini was a dumb, insensitive move. But he's trying to find a way to build some supportive friendship that they shared in early season one.

As for now, this boy needs to get his own grip on life and heal.

As for our Queen Gina

In Gina's confession, she focuses on their future. She basically said, "I wouldn't quit on a possible future of us being together despite obstacles. Because I never quit. But moving away isn't in my control." Ricky deep down knows this, encouraged her to say it, teary eyed, despite right after getting back together with Nini. Gina is his future. She went to his new house. And I also have this feeling that when she was given a chance to stay, she stayed partly because of Ricky. She left a chance to be with her mom because she prioritised their relationship. Because she never quits. 💪🏼

But she came back and found out Ricky has gotten back together with Nini.😭 What she doesn't know is Ricky got together with Nina before her confession, and after Gina kept dodging his messages. She's hurt and questions why she returned because she isn't particularly close to anyone. Hence, she was so silent at the after party. She thinks it'll be fine, "she'll live", and finds other reasons to find permanence. Her arc this season has been settling down in East High, despite the pain of losing and being 'betrayed' by Ricky, she finds other reasons to stay. 🏡

This kind of contrasts her with Nina. Nina left her dream school and came to Salt Lake because she missed her established home, and not just because of Ricky. Nina returned and was loved and embraced by Ricky Bowen.💕 Gina came back to a semi new place called Salt Lake because of her promise of a future to Ricky. But she got stabbed and she bled. 💔🗡

Think about her situation. She feels confused, alone, heartbroken, out of place and seperated from her mom. She's broken and hurting too. And she doesn't need more from Ricky's accidental or intentional 'sick burns'. That's the one line where he was such a jerk and I can't defend him here. 😠

Here comes the Caswells.

Her second family. A place of healthy stability. A home that accepted her. Ashlyn, her roomie and her confidante. EJ, the misunderstood boy who saw her value and bought her plane ticket.

Let's get to EJ.

At first, I wasn't too keen on seeing Portwell's development. But then that video chat where they talk about the possibility of her staying and him convincing her. Had me sold for a solid brother-sister relationship. Few episodes later, when Gina's pain seemed to be oblivious to everyone, he was the only one who asked her how she was, and saw her glow. The comfort she must've felt.

Not that she needs a man's validation, but she must be feeling like a second choice and feeling a little insecure because of Ricky. But EJ lifts her up and I genuinely saw her smile. This boy has her back whenever. The man she can lean on and truly sees how special she is. She no longer feels alone now that she has his entire fam and other friends. She genuinely feels a place of belonging and happiness when she's the apple of his eye. Notice how happy she is? How happy this boy is? She's going through her own issues and she has found ground with EJ.

I was very doubtful when they started hinting at a romantic direction. Because EJ would be used as plot device again for a girl to get to Ricky.😤 This man doesn't deserve to be second best to anyone, just like Gina.😑 That's why I'm still hesitant on shipping them at least temporarily. EJ needs to be something even more special to Gina. They need to show each other how special and treasured they are to each other despite feeling like rejects. They are each other's source of comfort.

I'm sure they can keep EJ at East High for the next season. Whether it's the drama club, or the AV club or going to a local college. So he will be there for Gina. I don't know how they can work out a relationship with much distance as Rini's fell out when she moved away. So, if EJ leaves again, it'll again shake up Gina. Her being worried whether he'll date college girls, second thoughts, etc. I don't want them to go through that. And if they do move on to romantic Portwell, make sure it's not plot device for Rina. So you can either have Portwell endgame or Rina Endgame.

Basically I want Gina to be treated so right that she understands she doesn't need Ricky. And when he does ask her out, and he makes her feel like a second choice or a rebound, she says NO. Because EJ has helped regain her self assurance. Eventually I want Gina to confide in EJ about her and Ricky. EJ is jealous but also angry about how Ricky has been hurting her. And becomes damn protective of his 'babe'. Ricky gets jealous of their relationship, restarting Ricky and EJ's old rivalry. But this time, it's not because Gina is his girlfriend, but because she's EJ's best friend who he has a crush on and wants what's best for her.

If it's meant to be Rina endgame

EJ- RICKY, YOU IDIOT! You have no clue how to treat her right. You don't put her first. You mislead her. Get the hell away from her! She's too powerful and beautiful, she doesn't deserve your scraps. I know how she feels for you. I wish I were you. I would treat her like a queen. I don't mind even waiting years till she's ready. She deserves that. You're so lucky you have even a small chance that I may never have. So get your act together, prove you're worth it to win her over. All I want is for her to be happy. Even if it's with someone else. And maybe then I'll stop threatening you to stay away from her.😠

Ricky- .....I don't know what I'm more scared of. Change, or losing the girl I fell for or YOU. Okay, losing her but you're a close second.😬

If it's Portwell endgame.

Ricky- I messed up. Make sure you don't mess up with her. You'll regret it forever.

EJ- I'd rather get hit by thousand basketballs than ever hurt her. I'll be her plus one and her best friend until she's ready to be with me. I know she's ready now too. But I want her to know I'm willing to wait till she graduates before we make it official. I'm in it for the long game.

As for their age gap. I'm 100% sure Portwell won't kiss this season. If they do, it'll be next when Sofia turns 18. They are professional actors who are cast because they are the perfect fit for the role and are expected to carry out the storyline. But I suppose fearing some outbursts, they might delay Sofia kissing anyone till next season. It's so weird because Olivia was maybe 17 when Matt was 21-22 when they kissed in season one. But no one had a problem with that. But for this, they do. Remember, they are professional actors. They are acting! Sometimes, actors are over 10 years apart (but above 18) and act as romantic partners.

As for their characters, they are only two years apart. That's hardly any difference once you're over the age of 18. Age of consent is 16. But adults above 18 are only allowed to have sex with adults above 18. So, age isn't a problem here because EJ is a gentleman and is genuinely interested in her and isn't trying to get in her pants. So age isn't the issue when it comes to dating. It's the maturity. Gina is very mature and gives very sound advice. But I can see EJ being patient enough till she turns 18 just to kiss her because he loves her. 😚

As for the Ashlyn remark, "You look like a kid to me rn". He was JOKING.😂 Don't take things out of context. I tell my cousin sister that all the time. But she's three years younger than me and a grown adult. I don't see her as a kid but it's just a cousin teasing her younger cousin that's she's a little immature. I'm Matt's age and I'm very mature for my age and since I was a teenager, I always matched up with boys a little older than me. Now that I'm in my early 20s, I've dated boys even close to 30. So age is just a number.

EJ dating Gina and giving her quick kisses is fine. But to have a strong sexual element in their relationship (including making out), he'll have to wait till she's 18+. And I'm sure for that he'll wait till she's ready even past her early 20s. Age is really just a number and we can't help who we fall in love with. Trust me, I've been there.😂 So I can see EJ feeling conflicted about his feelings that are clear at this point.

They might not be a perfect fit, but they make each other sooo happy. They deserve a lot more than a short lived fling.😟 They are either endgame or Rina is. You can't have both as a Rina unless you're an EJ hater who wants him to exist as plot device. Nope! He's sooo much more precious than that.

But Jack on the other hand....I'm okay if he's the one to make Ricky or EJ jealous. Because he's just been introduced and it's okay if a character is used, but only once, for someone else to realize their feelings. 💁🏽‍♀️

In short.

Ricky needs help and needs to be on his own. No girlfriends allowed.🙅🏽‍♀️🚫

Needs to give both Gina and Nina space for them to grow on their own too.🌳

Ricky needs to understand the core of his problems and become more adaptable via therapy. Maybe the psychologist will point out his unresolved feelings for Gina, or he will conclude it himself. And in comes Ricky-pining-for-Gina season three.

Ricky needs to fully get over Nina before he moves on to anyone. Same for Gina if Portwell were to happen. No one deserves to be second choice.

Gina isn't Ricky's cushion. She's a living person with strong feelings for him and shouldn't be subjected to share his pain. She already struggles with her own issues.

Ricky needs to stay single till he wins back Gina and prove he's worth it. He needs to show even if another girl wants him, he'll never quit on Gina ever again. Even if he has to watch her be with someone else. *cough parallels*.

It's either romantic Rina then Portwell endgame OR Portwell flirty besties but Rina endgame. You and I can choose only one because my boy EJ shouldn't be used as plot device for a girl to leave for Ricky ever again.

Portwell's age difference can be practically solved and isn't much of an issue unless they get hot and heavy before Gina turns 18 which is impossible considering this is Disney. 🤣🤣

Jack and Gina will be plot device material and purely so sentimental to us OG Andi Mack fans. More than any ship, this is what I'm looking for. Sort of an Andi Mack crack ship for season 3a. It's gonna be soooo funny. 😍😂

I respect everyone's ship. I see what you're seeing. And I'm not going to invalidate your ship. But unless it's done right, I won't jump from the Rina ship. I liked Rini. I like Portwell. I like AU Juffy crackship haha.😂 But as for me, I'm still holding on to Rina slowburn.

Preparing myself for the pain. 😭🔥

(But if I had to pair two characters without Disney getting in the way, it would be Gini. The power duo. Undeniable chemistry. They can be written so well because of their layered relationship and contrasting personalities.🤩 The classic rivals to friends to lovers. But that's a talk for another day lmao.)

Thanks for reading my opinion, Wildcat!🐱❤

[jess-themess05]

This isn't really an idea, but more of an explanation to better elaborate on how Vanessa's possession in my outlines worked

Prelude: How the possession in my outlines works

I have noticed that a lot of people are a bit confused on how the possession here works, so I wanted to clarify it with this little addendum of sorts. My version would have Vanessa initally black out occasionally for the first month or so after her initial possession. They would happen more specifically when she has her therapy visits. This is also where GlitchTrap/Afton attempts to rewrite her childhood memories to include an abusive father figure (presumably like him) to try and make her more obedient.

This is contrary to Vanessa's actual childhood, which was fairly standard and had 2 normal loving parents. It should be noted that in this universe they died in a car crash the year before the events of Help Wanted. All the therapists would play along as a way to diagnose her (or something idk) before eventually telling her that her memories don't line up with what her patient report sheet (or whatever they use) says about her childhood. (In this universe, patient 46 doesn't exist and the lines in their tapes about them misreporting their childhood experiences are moved into Vanessa's tapes. Also any references to courts in Vanessa's tapes are replaced with lines that imply Vanessa was the one who told th therapist about her "abusive" childhood.)

This gets rid of all the work Glitchtrap puts in and Vanessa original memories come back the overwhelming shock of which causes her to freeze up, and during this time she blacks out and Glitchtrap takes control of her and kills the therapist. He would then get her back to her apartment where she would regain consciousness and be none the wiser to her therapists fate. Controlling Vanessa directly takes a lot of energy from Glitchtrap and tires him out since he isn't intended to "control" humans just be manipulative. This is why he can't take direct control of Vanessa and has to resort to attempting to mentally gaslight her.

This happens 5 times before Glitchtrap says "screw this" and decides to create Vanny. He doesn't really want to do this, as he will be creating a different persona. This persona will be "programmed" to be subservient to him. However there is always a risk that since they are effectively their own person, this seperate personality can decide to not listen to the instructions correctly or do them their own way. They can also have their own goals that conflict with Glitchtrap's (something that you see in idea 6). He doesn't see any other way however, and is getting impatient and wants to start being evil again quickly. So he creates Vanny out of his own agony power thing and some of Vanessa's emotions. He uses ones that are still hurting from her parents death, duplicates and then corrupts them beyond all recognition.

Vanny is "made" (for lack of a better word) to control things directly, unlike glitchtrap. As such, the experience is now completely different. At her last therapist visit, Vanessa is forced to watch herself kill someone for the first time, starting off the worst 6 months of her life.

I hope that cleared up some confusion. 

yayayaya ooohh this is very helpful! more backstory aswell heheh >:)

well first off, what a power move to insert memories of an abusive father based on yourself. least he’s honest!

afton just getting rid of the therapist makes sense, the logical side of me (there isn’t much) thinks that if i were having frequent black outs and memory loss i would see a doctor, but who would want to take care of a patient, whom the last time they saw a professional, ended up being the last patient they would ever see before dying of mysterious causes

or

just a mysterious murder

and i still love the idea of vanny being made from vanessa’s negative emotions, her anger and irritability, just generally the emotions you’d rather not feel. i believe i’ve said this before (and if not then oops) but vanny technically being made from vanessa would make not blaming herself wAYYY more difficult! no she didn’t directly directly cause it, but possibly knowing her negative feelings were used to create her worst nightmare has gotta be difficult.

[b0rista]

— ❝︎ 𝐘𝐎𝐔 & 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐑𝐈𝐎𝐑 𝐓𝐑𝐈𝐎 𝐈𝐍 𝐀 𝐌𝐎𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐍! 𝐒𝐎𝐌𝐁𝐄𝐑 𝐂𝐈𝐓���� 𝐀𝐔. ·˚ ༘

♡︎ : the atmosphere i'm going for is frustratingly difficult to describe djjfjg the word "somber" doesn't really do it for me, but it's pretty much these emojis 🌑🌨🎞💸🚬⛓🔭

lowkey just wanted to put this trio & y/n (aka the loml) in a really dark, gloomy, modern metropolis type of place full of cold weather, inner monologues, and cigarettes JFKGK

ALSO my insp was the reiner + annie fanart in the center of the divider i made!! i really wish i knew the artist, but i couldn't find them :(( definitely NOT taking credit, it isn't my art whatsoever. but LOOK AT THEM UGH THE AESTHETIC

to balance things out, i wrote the reader as female! && characters are aged up to their early twenties.

the bunch of you met through your college courses— of course, the three of them had known one another since childhood, but you managed to weasel your way into their close-knit friend group. ever since then, you all share the melancholy city life.

during your guys' campus days, reiner worked for his master's in kinesiology. it isn't that big of a shocker that he aimed for something that pertained to his bulkier build,, mans grows up to be an absolute unit, lmao. wanting to maintain an above average salary, he used his education to earn himself a place in the certified training department. currently, he's a personal trainer of many clients, all of which he does his best to maintain.

bertholdt majored in philosophy, and worked toward his master's degree. with his intelligence, he got it. while all three of you (reiner especially), urged him to pursue non-profit professionalism, praising his skill and all around ability to do so, he lacked the confidence to push for it, and ended up going down another path. currently, he's sticking to the safe road, aiming to become a professor in the very course he excelled in. he's yet to get there, though— right now, he's a professor's assistant. it's less tiring, at least. still, he was capable of becoming something better.

as for annie, she majored in political science. unlike the other two, she worked to obtain a bachelor's degree. with that being said, she attended college for a little longer. eventually, she got her degree, and while she was a little lost after graduation, she made her way into the policy analyst game. she had the writing skills, sOmewhat of the drive, and while she's the youngest worker in her office, she's also the brightest. they're all also terrified of her, she speaks .6 words a day.

of course, what you did is entirely up to you! if you took two or three years to get your degree, you likely graduated alongside the boys. if it took longer, no worries, annie's degree took quite a bit.

now, the four of you are living in the same city, and you're all experiencing that said city's constant mournful, dingy atmosphere. the aesthetic is calming, actually; the weather is never nice, it's a rarity that you ever get an actual glimpse of the sun. no matter the season, so long as it isn't summertime, layers are a must. rainfall is a weekly occurrence, as well as the occasional thunderstorm. the merged stench of coffee grounds and burnt oil linger within the streets of the city, simply adding to the melancholy. basically, the general scenery is dark, cold, wet, and quiet. it's a gloomy place,, definitely comparable to forks, washington, but more of a metropolis than a town.

even with all of that being said, you and your friends have a good time. honestly, if you didn't all have eachother, you'd all probably go mental.

while reiner and bertholdt have their own seperate apartments, you and annie share a place. the rent was cheap, especially once split between two homeowners. two bedrooms, one bathroom, and a single kitchen & living area. it was too good of a deal to pass up. fortunately, you and her are compatible roomates.

with that being said, of course, it's often that the four lounge around at your guys' apartment. bertholdt always makes sure to check in before visiting, while reiner has the sour habit of showing up unannounced. you've both had to deny him a key, despite his pleading. you love him, but not that much.

sometimes, the two of them crash in your living room. typically, it's reiner on the couch while bertholdt takes up the floor, waking up the next morning in whatever flamboyant position he'd folded himself into during the night. every now and then, you and annie forget to head back to your rooms, and you crash right there with them. before you all fall asleep, you're typically all huddled up near the glass doored balcony, allowing the rainfall to serenade the four of you into a deep slumber whilst sitting within the crisp remnants of cigarette smoke and freshly opened liquor.

in a way, it's funny, because you all have a tendency to do that on a work night. just the four of you, sitting in your living room, drinking your alcohol, coating your furniture in the brisk stench of pure, solicited nicotine, watching your very own city drown within the darkening sky's tears as little to zero words are even spoken. when it comes to you and your friends, that's something that can never be contradicted; the quiet. these were how you spent your evenings together, especially after a rough day— silence, smoking, and the most peaceful sorrow imaginable.

of course, when you aren't wallowing in your own self pity, you're known to get drinks together. there's this certain booth in a local pub, it had burnt burgundy seats made out of leather. it's your guys' booth, and whenever you go out for a drink or two, that's where you sit. it's way back in the corner, where none of you can be bothered. one time, a couple of rascals had stolen it, and they refused to move. without a second thought, annie slammed one of those motherfucker's faces into the table. in suite, reiner took care of the other one, yanking him from the collar and kicking him to the floor. you and bertholdt only watched,, you were laughing, poor bert simply dragGed his palm down his face.

hey, at least you got your seats back! absentmindedly, you etched your initials into the bottom of the table with your pen. without a thought, the other three did the same, marking the corner as their own. don't fuck with that table, you'll be slaughtered.

when winter hits, it hits mercilessly. it's insanely aesthetic, seeing your group standing on the side of the busy street, all absolutely layered up in buttoned up winter coats and thickly knitted scarves. because they're both unnecessarily large, you depend on them for warmth every now and then. the amount of times you've buried your face within reiner's side while sitting on the subway during the midst of wintertime is stupid. as for bertholdt, he occasionally takes off his very own coat, draping it over you or annie's shoulders whenever either of you are seen shivering. he doesn't mind getting a cold, so long as you're warm.

speaking of the subway, your city has one. it's a pretty average way to travel, and due to none of you actually owning your own vehicles, it's where you go whenever walking or taking the bus isn't an option. the only one who isn't allowed to ride the subway alone is you. there was instance where on your way home from work, you had a run-in with an unpleasant bystander with the means to hurt you. ever since then, a code has been set where if you want to travel underground, you do it with one of them.

^ one time, you didn't listen, and you went by yourself anyway— unfortunately for you, reiner was boarding the exact same stop as you, and gave you quite the scolding. however, it's only because you're special to him. to all of them.

you and annie are actually closer than you'd imagine. being one of the only female friends she's ever been able to keep, you've grown to be an important figure in her life. of course, she'd never admit that to you, but you know. some nights, the two of you lean against one another on the sofa while black & white reruns play on the television, ultimately sending you both to sleep.

once a week, you have lunch with bertholdt at the university he assists at. you know just how glum the work makes him, and fortunately, you showing up every single sunday with coffee and sandwiches never fails to brighten his day. sometimes, you're the only one that can get him through the week.

bert's crush on annie is still very much a thing, even in this universe. of course, he's older, and for the most part, he's grown out of it. still, he stares. not as much as he once did, but he does. you and reiner only watch from afar, quietly sullen that he'd never quite gotten the guts to act on it.

bertholdt is also the group's umbrella holder. it's constantly raining, and due to his height, he's the one holding the bigass umbrella over the four of your guys' heads. when there isn't an umbrella, you just sort of seek refuse underneath his arms, which he gladly gives you. reiner and annie don't really mind, they get wet. it is a thing where you're all rushing to get out of the rain, the two men shielding the women's hair from the storm with their jackets as they run for shelter.

you all smoke. well, actually, whether or not you smoke cigarettes in this scenario is entirely up to you. if you'd like, ignore this part. anyway, cigarette sharing is a given. while reiner's preferred brand of darts is far more lucrative and more likely to kill him (he's dead inside, it fits), he won't hesitate to snatch a cigarette from in between the tips of your lips, bringing them to his own. it's something all of you do, even bertholdt. sharing is caring, you all say. you tend to do the same thing with wine glasses, or beer bottles.

it's practically gotham city, you're all dead inside grownups, god isn't real.

irllydidn'tlikehowthisturnedout-

[obeymehasinfluncedmythoughts]

Brothers with Mc Who Has PGAD (Pt 1 of ?)

This is going to be different then my other headcanons. I tried doing them like usual, but it didn't sit well with me. This is only like the first two chapters?? Idk how to explain it. It's hard to show the issues with PGAD in a relationship without just rehashing my chronic pain ask. I might be a bit rusty because I'm playing off and on right now, so please forgive if anyone is OOC.

Also, I want to state that this is NOT a representation of everyone who has PGAD. I couldn't possibly fit all the symptoms, feelings, and causes in here without contradicting myself. There are many causes in the female sex though (Deposits built on the clitoris, slipped disc, hormonal imbalances, pregnancy, misfiring signals from the brain/nerve, ext). I have a fucked up nerve somewhere along the line. I'm a rare case of a rare disorder where I was born with it and haven't experienced a day without PGAD. These are only how I expect someone with my exact symptoms would react, and how the brothers would react to that. Also! If you have PGAD, and don't know ways to help out, I'll give you some tips. Just hmu baby 💞.

Warning! Sensitive Content!

Coming to the Devildom is just as you'd expect it to be, it's literal hell.

You're stressed, like, majorly so. You don't have your medications on you, you've been seperated from your phone, and these demons are telling you you'll have to stay in their realm for a year, doctor's visits be damned.

The emotional connection between your pain and your reactions is rising by the second. It's clear on your face, and most probably by the way you dig your nails into the palms of your hands, attempting to draw your attention away from the growing burning sensation.

You don't feel comfortable being set up in a strange house with seven strange demons. They're rowdy and rude and it just sets you on edge to the point that you're very near jumping everytime one of them speaks to you.

They don't speak to you often, thankfully. If you refuse to engage with them, they're fine with keeping their distance. Sometimes you'll hear something from Mammon, your appointed guide, and the blonde seems to enjoy commenting on what books you're reading, but that's about it.

But then you're expected to go to school, five days a week, whilst fulfilling a stupid task list everyday, and all that pressure really weighs on you before it's even begun.

You can't sit down for eight hours, let alone sit on a hard surface in such a toxic that is highschool without being put out of commission for a few days. This will really mess with their whole plan, and you doubt you'll get cut any slack if you don't actually let at least one of the council members in on your condition.

It shouldn't have to be that way. You shouldn't have to justify your state of wellbeing to people you've barely known for two days, but the only way out of here is by playing the game, so you target the eldest brother.

You explain to Lucifer your condition. It's very professional, straight-forward, and he doesn't ask many questions besides the obvious.

The two of you eventually come to a pretty decent arrangement. On the days when you're in too much pain to handle things, you can stay home, and do whatever you can to catch up. It's not exactly the best option, considering you have different teachers online and in person, but it works for the most part.

He does require you to do some studying with the third eldest though. Leviathan, you learn, is a shut-in. Most his schooling is online, and since you're situation tends to make you miss many days of school, Lucifer wants him to help you out.

The two of you don't exactly get along at first. Leviathan is the type to work alone, and he's not the best at explaining. So during the first two days, you kinda flounder from paper to paper, task to task. It's just more stress on your plate. You snap at him when he gets impatient with you, and he'll return the gesture with some mumbled insults.

Eventually the two of you get to a state where you can at least work together without arguing over something small, but he's still a little annoying to you.

Satan kinda steps up here too. He knows Levi isn't really the best at explaining things that aren't dipped in a convoluted storyline, so he tries to help out when he sees you in the library, often searching for information for your assignments.

And Satan is incredibly patient. Even without knowing of your condition, and that's kinda the support you need. Learning with PGAD is hard, because any sort of frustration just puts you in pain. He doesn't get offended if you snap, or if you're a bit stubborn because of this. Something about him recognizes that desperation in your eyes; the want to do things, but he just knows there's something holding you back. He's not sure what, and he doesn't ask out of respect for whatever you must be dealing with (Which is such a breath of fresh air).

Mammon, on the other hand, isn't as graceful in his approach. He doesn't really pick up on your vibes and that proves to be a bit unfortunate when you're having a hard time translating your feelings.

He takes most things you say a little too personal, despite also having a tendency to blurt out the first thing that comes to mind.

You two get on each other's nerves pretty equally. The stress that results makes being in his presence a bit difficult.

But no one makes your life worse then Asmodeus.

Sure, he's sweet. He probably picks up on the fact that you take baths as often as he does and gives you some fancy soaps/stuffs, but he's a little too touchy.

And a bit too sexual.

You try to distance yourself from him, and it has mixed results depending on how persistent Asmodeus is feeling that day.

The only one who you don't interact with much is Beel, and that's kind of a blessing in disguise. You're hardly a few days into your residency in the Devildom and you're already struggling to keep up with school and the brothers (as well as the voice coming from the attic...but you try to push that and Lucifer's threats to the back of your mind.)

Things only get worse when you make your pact with Mammon. In fact, the only good thing that really comes out of it is that you are able to help out Leviathan. Everything else feels like a shitstorm.

There was the expected teasing. The "Mammon was dumb enough to get played by a human" bit that really got old after the first time and a few offers to make some more pacts from lesser demons at school (which you always turned down). All the attention made your day stressful as fuck. You could hardly think without feeling strongly in some sort of way, and having a stabbing pain zeroing in on your pelvis.

And to your suprise, he can totally feel it.

(Personally I like to believe pacts go a bit deeper then the 'oh I can make you do things'. I feel it should be considered more, given how much power is given to them, and how often it's stated that the guys don't just give them out. If they were just about control, I have no doubt Mammon would have probably used it in a moment of desperation. In fact, it's kinda out of character that he hasn't at least made the mistake ONCE, so I headcanons there is a emotional/physical bond that comes with it.)

It's not completely there. He doesn't get all the pain and strife you do, but there's enough for him to kinda put the pieces together. He's not delicate in approaching you about it, however he thankfully does pull you aside after dinner, saving you the embarrassment of talking about genitals at the dinner table.

You explain to him what exactly PGAD is. That your body is feeling a sexual desire, but you mind isn't. So, instead of being pleasurable, it's painful.

He's not exactly sure what you're saying, but he becomes a lot more protective over you from now on.

[we-always-hit-our-ass]

Okay, but I need some Joe Toye headcanons like I need air. Help a girl out

Taglist: @floydtab, @deldontplay, @thatsonefishyboi, @noneofurbusinez, @meteora-fc, @hufflepuffpancakes

I just want to say that i love toye more than i love myself. This boy deserves everything and i mean it!

Btw thanks @adamantiumdragonfly for requesting these lovely hcs, i had a lot of fun writing this! 💕💕

General/Fluffy HCs for Joe Toye

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-------------------

so you see right here, this man is a professional lover and sweetheart extraordinaire 

you two actually met when running currahee

joe stumbled along the way and you gripped his arm to prevent him from falling

thought it was one of the boys like like luz or guarnere or just practically anybody

boy WAS HE WRONG

he was instantly like !!!!! but it soon turned into 💕💕💕

immediately thinks he died during training and went into heaven

looks like he is having the time of his life, he is by the way

you ask him if he’s ok as youre running along side him

joe nods his head slowly like the cute dope that he is

either of you could have fallen behind or could have run faster but nope!

you two keep the same pace as each other so y’all arent seperated and lose sight of each other

after that, you and joe are close as fuc-

when i mean close i MEANT CLOSE

theres endless laughter and happiness

snarky and sassy remarks from both parties

and you two doing whatever- 

literally toye is one of the people that you can never get mad at-

its impossible for him to make you mad i swear, he’s just too sweet and caring and this man can never do any wrong-

sooooo u and joe might or might not have huge crushes on each other

i'm just saying, but u two totally do-

if you were to walk into a room that joe was in, his eyes immediately go to you, because why not?

like seriously, joe would literally try to freeze the sun for you

but whenever you thank him he’s all like “that’s what best friends are for”-

the easy boys are so done believe me so they just watch in the background while commenting how stupidly cute u both are-

joe enjoys being sweet to you but he’ll never say it

you point it out sometimes while smiling and joe just erupts into flames

joe would never admit it, and this is a very well kept secret of his, only person who knows abt it is HIM and him alone

so basically during eindhoven, joe purposely yeeted his face away when a girl tried to kiss him and no one knew why-

after the day you met him, he made sure that lips were only reserved for u

everyone thought it was weird how he would launch himself away from the girls but you found it cute

you teased him a lot after that day and joe would act like he’s offended but in reality he's so goddamn head over heels for you-

joe legit doesn't know what to do around you, you're just so amazing

you and toye could either be the kids or the parents in the group, its an amazing vibe-

okok but the way he confessed to you was soo MMMM-

joe woke you up in the middle of the night to see the stars

after a few words of persuasion, you went outside with him and with your hand in his as he led the way

y’all sit down and when you gaze up at the sky, holy SHIT it was very beautiful-

toye loved your reaction and the smile you gave him after was worth way more than any fucking treasure-

joe was surprised when he didn’t stutter when he told u how much he loved you-

like if you were sleepy- not anymore! 

you immediately woke up and just stared at him for a good couple of minutes

but damn you told him how much loved him too- but like seriously picture this

midnight, stars, love confessions, and tender and passionate kisses with joe fucking toye-

it wasnt what you were expecting but excuse it was so fucking good-

btw this boy’s spunky attitude will bring you to tears-

like hes overly sarcastic and you would just burst up laughing because its so fucking funny-

one of the things you also love about joe is that he’s a sassy boy who’s actually very sweet once you get to know him

this is one the many things that made you fall from him-

when joey gets tipsy he will lean on you for support and will deny that he’s drunk

toye will also drunkenly say how much he loves you and that youre the best person ever-

toye will end up falling asleep after you run your hands through his dark hair while he’s cuddled up against you-

you fall asleep not so long afterwards

YO- joey boy cherishes everything you give him and he just really appreciate the little things that you do

like if you hold a door open for him or even just pick out stuff that got stuck in his hair i'm pretty sure he’ll think about for days on end

hes also genuinely enjoys it when you talk to him about things you are very passionate about

like toye will literally just come up with the stupidest conversations just so he can hear talk and you can say the same for him

his voice is so fucking perfect and its always immediately recognizable 😩👌

toye will iNDEED bring you small gifts that he thinks you might like-

joey is very VERY protective of you

like if he sees a person making you feel discomfort in anyway he will yeet the poor bastard

he doesn't go completely overboard, most of the time, he just really wants you to be safe

you two still having your weekend passes are VERY rare since sobel likes being a lil bitch

wo when you two actually have it, joe makes sure to make it count

he takes you to the bar sometimes while other times he takes you into town to ditch the noise and his hella drunk friends

um so he takes you around the stores and shops and you two will impulsively buy the randomest shit

the easy boys immediately stop trusting u both with money

yeah the items you two buy are cute but they have no literal use

during one of these trips joe buys you a really gorgeous necklace and you just ascended-

im not kidding

you never took off the necklace off your neck after that day

toye also gives you small gifts and lemme tell this boy even gives you a small camera

both you and toye take pictures of each other with it and the both of you always make sure to keep photos of one another

joe is also one of those boyfriends who has a surprise for you each and every single day-

either he’d take you swimming, riding bikes, eating at a diner, or watching a simple movie together

no matter how simple the activity, joe will find a way to make it the best experience you will ever have-

when watching a movie, joe would put snarky remarks in between the scenes and the experience is just alleviated-

when you two wake up next to each other in the morning, its the most peaceful little thing that has ever existed

sometimes you would wake up earlier and joe would still be asleep with his arms around you

toye will unknowingly pull you closer to him and wont let you go for a very long time-

did i mention toye’s devilishly cute morning voice??? 

his little good morning cuddles are pure and utter fluff and you will never get tired of it!

toye will surprise you with random hugs from behind every single day-

it soon became one of the things that you couldn’t live without

like he so tender, yet firm? and the hug is so fucking comforting what???

toye will hug you anytime and anywhere

his hugs bring you the most source of joy and they just make you so happy

if youre tired when he hugs you, you are immediately energized from the complete act alone

if youre sad, joe’s hugs will comfort you and you’ll just smile into his chest and his arms are wrapped around your waist

when youre angry, you just cool down in his touch- 

his hugs give you life and just repel off any negative emotions

if you were to be honest, toye and his hugs are probably your most favorite things in the whole entire world-

toye is just an overall very caring and hella GOOD boyfriend 

it has come to the point where both of you cannot exist without the other-

you love him with all of your heart and he loves you with all of his 😩💕

------------------------

-------------------------

im sorry for any mistakes that i made and i hope that everything is alright. btw im sorry for me taking so long to write this, i tried my best to finish it! 

but i love toye and he’s complete and utter perfection, thank you very much-

thank you for reading this and supporting me you guys are everything! 😩😊💕💕💕

[lexpressobean]

Catching Up

A Sasuke and Shino... thing... It's not terribly organized.

This is just a thing I wrote, I have too many ideas going around in my head.

AU where Sasuke and Shino are childhood friends and Sasuke never leaves and other self indulgent bullshit

Mention of SasuNaru (only feelings); Mild Swearing.

•••

The sun would be getting ready to set soon, but Sasuke had finally found Shino out in the outskirts of Konohagakure, where a gentle stream passed through a small ravine in the forest. This was a spot where water striders were commonly found, almost seeming to play on the surface of the flowing water and as agile as any ninja walking on water.

Sasuke had meant to catch up with Shino, who had come back from a mission earlier in the day. Though, it was strange. Usually Shino wasn't all the way out here doing who knows what right after a mission. Sasuke would have thought he would be resting at the Aburame compound, especially since it had been a bodyguarding mission that seemed more lively than not according to Lord Shibi. Though Lord Shibi wasn't sure exactly where Shino had went, Sasuke had an idea.

Except, when Sasuke arrived, he was met with a cold reception. Which was very strange. Usually the only people who Shino got with like this were Naruto and Kiba, and, well, for good reason. Those two were idiots. And Shino could tolerate A LOT before he decided he was done tolerating. It was also worrying, seeing as Sasuke had been looking forward to seeing Shino today, so what gives? As far was Sasuke knew, the mission was a success. And Sasuke could use some company after today. The telltale signs of a having been in a fight were literally all over Sasuke's face, but no substantial damage had been done. At worst, maybe a sore jaw. Surely Shino had noticed.

Sasuke: Why are you so moody all of a sudden?

Shino: I don't want to talk about it.

Sasuke: Oh no, I know you, Shino. If we don't talk you're gonna just keep digging yourself into a huge pit, so just tell me!

Shino: It's nothing to be concerned about. You can let it go.

Sasuke: I can't let it go if you don't let it go. And I know you wont let it go. I know it's hard to talk sometimes but, it's better to, isn't it?

Shino: ... It'll be fine.

Sasuke: Which means it's not fine now! ... C'mon Shino... You're really the only one I can talk to myself. I don't even tell my brother half the things I tell you.

Shino: !?

Sasuke: So, even though I'm not all that great at this, the least I can do is at least try to understand. If it means something to you, then it means something period. Right...?

Shino: ... Huh. If you needed to talk, I would've thought you and Naruto had gotten that close by now, seeing as I was absent till this afternoon.

Sasuke: Huh!? Me and Naruto!? (Why would he bring him up all of a sudden!?) That idiot is as useless as a thin hammer! I mean, we might have been on the same team for a little more than a year now, but even then he's NOWHERE as thoughtful as you! He's just so dumb and oblivious, why would I ever trust him with any of my problems!? You know how much of a moron he is, his brand of stupid is legendary!

Sasuke got so worked up he was flushed in the face. It was mostly out of embarrassment, thought he hoped Shino took it as rage.

Shino: ... Is that how it is?

Sasuke: Yes! He wouldn't know tact if it came and bit him in the ass!

Shino: ... It sounds like you're mad at him, which is surprising. Why? Because but you were laughing with him earlier today. Is he responsible for your face too?

Sasuke: !! Huh? You saw us earlier? I didn't see you.

Shino: I know you didn't.

Sasuke: !?!?!? (OH... shit... I see...).

Shino: But now I'm curious... What exactly happened today?

Sasuke: !? N-Nothing happened! He's just not a very ideal candidate for conversation in general... Talk to him all you want about training and Shinobi business, but there's a pretty huge lack of depth there for anything else... And maybe he ended up pissing me off a little...

Shino: That's pretty strange... You seem to enjoy yourself so much in his presence despite.

Sasuke: !? ... ... ... *eye squint* ... Shino... do you... have a problem with Naruto?

Shino: No. *starts to walk away towards the village*

Sasuke: H-HEY!! Don't you walk away from me!

Shino: Don't tell me what to do.

Sasuke: !! (He can be kinda scary when he's pissed...) But how am I suppose to hear you out if you're not here!? *follows*

Shino: I told you, no need to concern yourself.

Sasuke: Augh, you can be so difficult!

Shino: So I've been told.

Sasuke: ... Has Kiba been giving you trouble again?

Shino: I wasn't insinuating anything.

Sasuke: And I know you could kick his ass yourself if you wanted to, but you're not like that. I know he can be just as irritating... Or you tell me what is actually bugging you.

At that moment, time seemed to stop the second Shino did. Sasuke heard himself too late, but instantly regretted everything.

Sasuke: *SWEATING*  ... I... am so sorry... I didn't mean it, you know I didn't.

Shino: ... Sounds like Naruto is starting to really rub off on you.

Sasuke: !?!? (This is the third time he mentions him! ... Alright) Shino, did Naruto upset you recently?

Shino: I haven't had the pleasure of even speaking with him recently, so no.

Sasuke: Then... if it wasn't Naruto, or Kiba... Is it cause I didn't see you earlier?

Shino: There's no reason to be upset over that. You were already engaged in something else and I simply happened to pass by and see you. It's okay Sasuke, I'll live if you don't say Hi everytime we cross paths.

Sasuke: Then what is it??

Shino: ... I already realized it's nothing to worry about... So you really don't have to worry either...

Sasuke: ... So... What... you don't trust me, then? Just gonna keep it all to yourself?

Shino: It's not that.

Sasuke: It's what it feels like! Can't you see I'm trying here!?

Shino: I've simply gone past it, why even talk about it?

Sasuke: BECAUSE IT'S WHAT FRIENDS DO!? Sometimes you're over it but it's nice to be filled in! I care! Stupid Shino!

Sasuke crossed his arms as he started at the back of Shino's head. Shino wouldn't turn to meet his gaze, and Sasuke wasn't gonna hold his breath, but, you know, it'd just be nice.

Shino: ... ....

Sasuke: ... Well?

Shino: ... ... I was... starting to feel... lonely...

Sasuke: !? O-Oh...

Shino: But we all have obligations and things to do... And you should spend your free time however you wish.

Sasuke: !! However I... Holy shit, are you JEALOUS of Naruto?

Shino: No. The feeling passed. Why? Because I realize now it's... nothing to be worked up about... We're still friends even if we're not together all the time...

It made sense. Ever since they had been spilt into seperate teams, Sasuke and Shino hadn't been able to see each other as often. Their different teams' specialties meant they wouldn't be working very close together any time soon.

Sasuke: ... Hmm... I guess... If I really think about it, we haven't properly hung out in a while...

Shino: We're getting busier as we get more experience. It's just the natural course of things. We're not academy students anymore, and soon, we'll all be chunin, I'm sure of it. We have to prepare ourselves.

Shino had this way of constantly trying to logic everything into a workable justification or solution. In a way, Sasuke respected that a lot, but sometimes it was just a too much of a cold stretch for his liking. Shino had all the makings of a great Shinobi, and Sasuke looked forward to the day Shino would head his clan, an equal with his older brother Itachi. He knew he was going to be excellent. But while he was still young, it certainly wouldn't kill Shino to try and live a little more. Sasuke decidedly walked up next to Shino, copying his friend's pose by pocketing his hands.

Sasuke: Yeah, but... It just means we gotta plan things out more, that's all. We can figure something out.

Shino: ... That could help.

Every once in a great while, Shino went soft in mid conversation. And Sasuke always knew he could take it as a good sign, and it always made Sasuke happy to hear that softeness. It was also kind of cute in a way, though Sasuke'd never say that outloud.

Sasuke: *smirks* Shino, sometimes I forget how sweet you really are.

Shino: Don't push it, Sasuke.

Shino decided they would continue to walk, and Sasuke followed, both boys a lot more relaxed now.

Sasuke: *laughs* ... But you know... I am sorry...

Shino: There's no need to apologize. My reaction wasn't very logical or fair. I should be happy for my friends.

Sasuke: First of all, you're a great friend... but if you were feeling like that. Well, I know first hand Naruto is hard to deal with... He's my teammate, but now I'm starting to think we, he and I, don't make very good friends. I think I have to remember sometimes it's, okay if you don't... you know... feel that strongly about each other. Some people just don't mix, and I don't want to be the kind of person that neglects my actual friends trying to improve my professional relationships more than possible.

Shino: Well that's a lie if I've ever heard one.

Sasuke: ??

Shino: Anyone with eyes can see you two get along exceptionally well.

Sasuke: !?

Shino: But if the problem is that he's oblivious and tactless, then maybe you should be asertively honest and tell him upfront about whatever it is that's troubling you.

Sasuke: Tch, I don't wanna hear that from you.

Shino: I told you I was over it, because I was. You obviously are not over it. Whatever this thing of yours is.

Sasuke: Ha, there's no thing.

Shino: ...

Damn it, Shino really could see through Sasuke sometimes. Maybe he was a Yamanaka in a previous life. His intuition was nerve wracking some days.

Sasuke: Seriously, there's no specific thing! I was speaking in a general sense! Naruto is a good teammate, and he's always going on about being rivals and becoming Hokage... And that's fine! If he thinks he can beat me, I'd like to see him try. But we'll probably never be very good friends, that's all I was saying. I've realized this recently.

Shino: Wait, Sasuke.

Sasuke: What is it?

Shino: ... Do you smell that?

The two boys stopped in their tracks and Sasuke put his guard up and looked around, analyzing their immediate surroundings. He saw no smoke, no signs of fire or recent activity, nor could detect any smells of animals that could give off scent.

Sasuke: Huh? Smell? I don't smell anything significant.

Shino: Really? Because to me... It's smells an awful lot like bullshit.

Sasuke choked on a scoff and became exasperated. This absolute jerk!

Sasuke: OH SHUT THE HELL UP SHINO, YOU SHITHEAD!! UGH!! Naruto rubbing off on me, sounds like maybe you've been around Kiba too long!

Shino: I can't force it out of you. But just like you, I'll be patient.

Sasuke: ??

Shino: When you're ready, you can tell me. I won't forget though.

Sasuke: Hmph, yeah yeah...

Shino: ...

Sasuke: ... ... I will... Just... just not right now... Okay...?

Shino: ... Eventually...

Sasuke: ... ... Eventually...

Shino: Okay.

Sasuke: ... Thank-you...

Shino offered a fist in Sasuke's general direction. Usually, it was Sasuke which initiated it, but coming from Shino, it meant a lot. He reluctantly smiled and bumped it. And if he guessed, correctly, Shino smiled under his collar too.

Sasuke: ... C'mon let's go get something to eat.

Shino: Huh?

Sasuke: My treat for a mission well done.

Shino: I can't have you do tha-

Sasuke: Shut it. Just take the damn offer!

Shino: If you insist.

Sasuke and Shino decidedly walked side by side, taking their time through the forest. As they talked about Shino's mission, Sasuke's progress, their brothers, and whatever else they thought up, Shino already seemed a hundred percent lighter in his mood. But Sasuke couldn't shake it from his mind. He knew Shino was made of tough stuff, but he'd never wanna cause any friend to feel like that. This was a wake up call.

Sasuke was sure of his feelings. But his feelings for Naruto should never have gotten the better of him. He lost his temper today when Naruto just wasn't getting it. He thought for a hot minute and seventeen seconds Naruto might have actually been flirting with him. Flirting. With HIM. But he realized it was just him being delusional after Naruto made some off colored remarks.

What an idiot. Sasuke was actually thankful Shino hadn't seen that part...

... And yet... Sasuke wasn't over it, as Shino so smartly pointed out...

... Maybe it was time to burry these feelings, before they really got out of hand. Sasuke cared about Shino, his best friend since the academy. Always willing to lend an ear, surprisingly sassy and snarky once you got to know him well, loyal and understanding. Severely underappreciated by the rest of their cohorts, though Sasuke was sure Hinata Hyuuga was definitely a good match for him team-wise. And maybe if Shino played his cards right, something more?

... Sasuke was sure the day would come when Shino found a girl to be interested in and charm. But he was also dreading that day, seeing as it'd probably be easy for Shino once he decided he really wanted a girlfriend. Sasuke knew Shino had a pretty nice face under all those layers, especially around the eyes when he could see them in profile. But even before the gravity of his personal situation really hit him, he had already decided he liked Shino as a friend, and would rather not lose that. Sasuke thought he knew better, yet, here he was, in the closet with no active intention to follow through, but nonetheless undeniably drawn in by his clamorous teammate. Sasuke still had the upperhand on the field, for now, but Naruto was still getting the best of him in his own damn head. He still wasn't sure what it was about Naruto, all he knew is that this had to stop. He really didn't want to make Shino feel like that again, and cause drama within his own team for reasons he was unwilling to explain like earlier. Even Kakashi was visibly more invested than usual, and Sasuke loathed the idea of creating unecessary misunderstandings in general, or anything else like that. Sakura also looked so worried...

So for the sake of peace of mind, Sasuke decided that evening that he'd be done with Naruto.

No more distractions and wishful thinking. Shino was right.

It's time to focus on the future.

•••

But y'all know they ain't never gonna be done. Tune in next time as Naruto tries to bring "the old Sasuke" back and makes an absolute scene amost every other week over not getting enough of Sasuke's attention for the 2 years lmao.

[im-not-shouting-im-projecting]

Some Seamster!Quinn Cooper HCs

I didnt intend for this to be this long, but my seamstress heart was inspired. I got kind of carried away, and had to refocus, so I'm going to do another post soon with some advice and anecdotes for wrighting costumers.

For the last couple of months I have been absolutely Obsessed with @poindextears 's Crickets, her SMH post-Waffle Frog OCs, and I have had a lot of headcannons about Quinn Cooper: a theatre kid extrordanare and Hoh icon who talks like he's from 50s and is the boyfreind of Nando (Cricket dman) as we have quite a bit in common. All of Mel's fics are amazing, and I would highly recommend! Give them a read on tumblr or AO3

--

I know Mel has said that Quinn's favorite place is Joanne's, which is completely understandable for someone who doesn't live near actual textile markets... but Joanne's (and similar chain craft/fiberarts supply stores) suck.

Like first of all, on a monetary level... I'm going to start with the assumption that high school Quinn didn't have a large project budget (reasoning: 1. his family is already tight with money, 2. I can't imagine his not-particularly-supportive guardians gave him lots of spending money (esp with theatre fees and materials) 3. I can't imagine he brought in tons of money on the side with a theatre schedule + grades good enough to go to med school + time with his old lady freind + time for sewing)

With that being said: Fabric is expensive. Way more expensive than people expect. Especially if you don't have expensive machinery (like overlock machines) that make cheap synthetic fabrics usable. Also I like to imagine Quinn is in the "fabrics made of plastic are itchy and bad for the enviornment" club like me.

All that is to say: Joanne's is absolutely the worst place that isn't actively upscale to buy fabric (or materials) on a budget.

- The shop's target demographic is stay-at-home white suburban moms who have the time to clip coupons, buy materials on a "when it's on sale" basis as opposed to a "my sister didn't notice the four seperate places I marked my shears 'fabric only' so now I physically cannot continue this project without buying new extra-sharp fabric scissors'" basis, and importantly: can stop by the store every day for a month because discounted items change on a day to day basis, all of which is not particularly conducive to someone a high school kids on a budget.

- Even with all the discounts in existance, the fabrics there are still super expensive and especially for the often lackluster quality (like... they are fine but if I'm paying literally $40/y for enough faux fur to make a big enough "mane" to cover the gap between the cowardly lion's padding and the actor's neck, we shouldnt have to sweep the fur bits off the stage at intermission)

- Additionally if you need a lot of fabric, say enough 7ft squares of heavy mustard yellow fabric for 30 lioness cape/pants? You might just need to run 4 seperate Joanne's out of two different fabrics that were close enough to each other to work

If you are putting in the time and effort to make something complicated,

- Also, and this is probably the most obvious: there just aren't that many options. If you want anything other than a cotton or fleece, than you better hope the single shade they have in the right color works

So I have established: Joanne's = Bad

So how does Quinn factor into all this?

Well first of all I would like to imagine that at some point Quinn helped out in SMH costuming, where they teach him the magic of using something that already exists. Samwell being as liberal as it is, I would like to think that the costuming people are aware of how awful the current state of fabric waste is, and, how his sewing skills are so much better used altering things at thrift shops beginning his journey twords my completeley basess headcannon that he one day adopts some vintage looks

While I think he would be down to adopt some of these practices in his costuming (a la my personal anectode below), I have a feeling that Quinn is one of those people who just likes to make things from scratch. (reasoning: 1 his general personality, but far more importantly, 2 THIS BOY WANTED TO MAKE EVAN HANSEN'S POLO BY HAND, WHY??? WHAT IS THE PURPOSE??? DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH TIME THAT TAKES???????? YOU ARE WILLING TO SPEND UPWORDS OF TEN HOURS OF YOUR LIFE ON A MODERN STYLE SHIRT THATS GOING TO BE SEEN 4 TIMES???)

I get it, especially for historical reconstructions, there are people who genuinely love sewing by hand, I love Bernadette Banner as much as the next seamstress, but I honestly don't know how they do it.

I like to think that Quinn would be wandering around some thrift store and out of the corner of his eye notice some curtains and have a vision of frolicking through a meadow like Julie Andrews in cloths made out of a curtain... metaphorically. But he def gets "Do a Dear" stuck in his head every time he wears it

Of course the SMH Costuming crew introduce him to some better places to at least get draping and mock up fabrics, but I think they would also introduce him to an actual fabric store.

Samwell is close enough to Boston that I'm sure there's an actual fabric warehouse within driving distance, so when Quinn can't find a suitable material at his beloved Joanne's, and is understandably skeptical about ordering fabric online, Ford is just like dude, go to the fabric warehouse, so he gives it a try.

Ok his fist thought when he gets there is omg everything is so big. Ok, that's his second thought, his first thought is ugh this smells like the SMH locker room, bc a giant block of concrete with no internal climate control in the New England humidity stuffed to the brim with moisture-holding fabric is def gonna make some kind of funk.

But after that like...

Ok, on the left is your average Joanne's while on the right is your average fabric warehouse

I can totally imagine him physically getting lost. He is tiny, and those places are total mazes, absolutely ginormus, they are all stacked literally 8 feet tall, and all the rows look the same.

Fabric in warehouses is stored for maximum capacity as opposed to places like Joanne's where it is purposely stored in ways that display the whole selection at once. Additionally, while hobbyist bolts face out as much as possible so you can see it at a glance, professional grade bolts face in for protection

...If it's on the shelves at all, the hallmark of a textile warehouse is just dozens of bolts leaning haphazardly in precarious places

This tiny boy is just absolutely surrounded by rows upon rows of fabric, stored in ways that are absolutely not conducive to being looked at easily, and is incredibly frusturated bc Aggghhh I can't look at any of this without moving all of it around, and I can't reach any of it!!!

BUT!

Guess what he has?

Nando to the rescue!

Quinn's big strong dman boyfriend is more than willing to move around and carry the bolts for him and when need be he'll just straight up plop Quinn on his shoulders so he can see the stuff at the top :)

Ok, that's the gist of what I had to say, some other little seamster!Quinn hcs:

his old lady friend taught him the absolute basics, and his wedding gift from her is her 70 year old sewing machine that he first learned to sew on and he treasures that thing FOREVER

bc of his apparent love of hand sewing he is one of those people that swears by genuine leather thimbles, idk why it just feels like him

whenever people compliment his outfit he is just casually like "Oh thanks, I made it" (bc non sewers are always astounded by that and we get to gloat) because I said so

he makes Nando cute crop tops

[mikkock]

Hey hi your murder mystery art is super totally cool and amazing and I'd like to Extra! Extra! hear all about it *rattles bells*

haha wow i cant believe ud ask me THIS! unbelievable! now im gonna have to make a long post!

all info under the cut cause im kind like that ♥

For reasons I felt like making a Fancy Ass murder mystery story, with you know, hella complex secret storylines and everyone having drama and shit, and one person died but the more the story goes the less people care about who did the murder and the more they want tHE JUICY DETAILs. X and Y had an afFAIR you say!!! well that’s thousands time more interesting than that murder that happened, who cares about the culprit its not like any of us are going anywhere anyway! tell me more about the marital issues!

The ultimate Vibes are Clue (the game, ya kno, it had a movie too, and that movie was shot with three different endings -fun fact- so that movie theatres could play one alternatively that way people wouldnt get spoiled or even if they did they would not get the ending they were spoiled or even if all three were spoiled you couldnt know which ending you were getting anyway, big dick move, cause its an old movie and film is expensive, also that movie stupid and campy, ALSO I ONLY LEARNED MAKING THIS AU THAT IN ENGLISH THE GAME’S CALLED “CLUE” wE CALL IT CLUEDO therefore my wip playlist is called cluedo. because. fuck it.)(i just have an emotional attachment to that game i even had a cd rom video game version and it was the spookiest shit for a 6 years old, trust me, i played it so much tho i didnt even understand the rULES i was just making scenarios like gathering the characters in rooms n making conversations outloud cause honestly the banter is the best part of a murder mystery) ANYWAY that sure is a whole paragraph of tangent. 

BUT YE the inspo from the Clue game. you can tell it from the Colours obviously, everyone’s colour codded.(even everyone’s name is colours as well you’ll see it’s real dang fancy! im just remaking that game but with 2932020 characters and more behind the scenes drama and also for gay people.)

So BASIC PLOT!

Sir Belyy, the dude in white, is The Rich Powerful Respected Fancy Boss, and he throws a Fancy Reception Party with his closest friends and associates to celebrate the opening of a new branch of his business. All the lads gather in his wonderful little very isolated mansion in the middle of nowhere, like ok he got a death wish or something or he’s very trusting of his business partners, but not a good move, cause in the middle of the reception, as A Phat Storm Starts (for plot convenience, we going with a campy vibe if you couldnt tell), his body is found, it’s awful, there’s a killer on the loose! All the guests gather, and attempt to maybe contact the authorities, to not avail, since The Storm ya know, phone lines are Broken my dude. Its clear that the culprit is among them, since no one could have entered the house, or left it (cuz once again, ThE sTORm). And then it’s all about interrogating each other, distrust, alliances and betrayal, revealing one’s deepest secrets when they form an alibi and revealing someone else’s deepest secret for they could be a motive! Meanwhile there’s a dead body in the mansion just chillin there. 

.

So as I mentioned, I changed everyone’s name to be colour related (or ya know, food or flowers of that colour cause sometimes a colour in a language would not work as a name given the way names work in that culture all that jazz) which is the trippiest thing cause tHATS NOT YALLS USUAL NAMES but its fun (also changed so many ages hgfhs it was a trip)(still no one’s really old i guess i got boomerphobia). The “Cast” is clearly the most important part, and if ur a True “My OCs” Connaisseur (hdfghd the most useful skill to have, knowing *MY* Charactersdshgd) you may have recognised some faces and can already read some vibes and predict who will be progressing the plot and who will be yelling at people throwing accusations ghdfgd.

(god i wish i hadnt slacked off making the portraits of everyone in that AU i only have 3 tho that’s so sad so ill just make little sketches just cause <3 only text??? i got too many hoes with no attention span for that)

.

Sir BELYY (the one who dIEs lmao)

(bust shot missing the fact that this man is the tallest beefiest lad around)

Intimidating, powerful, composed, wealthy, carries the name of a family who has generations of control to it’s reputation, he’s The Man that hoes who believe in the economy wishes they were. As in, the “self made” man who only just happened to benefit from having a wealthy background to uplift his plans. In his youth, he wanted to prove his worth, seperated himself from his father, started a business, that business became big, then got attached to the family’s business, bam back to square one but with Reputation now. There seemed to be VERY big tension between him and The Father, some speculate it had to do with his unknown mother, and some family drama there, and it never got resolved as old man Belyy died quite young (the jUICY speculations are that current sir Belyy mURDEREd old man sir Belyy, fucked up if true!). People love him though in general, as he has that reputation of “Cold Lad With a Gold Heart” aka he takes people under his wings, donates, doesnt treat his employees like the absolute worst garbage etc... you know, he’s rich and a half decent person, so obviously he’s an angel on earth. But does it matter though, he’s dead! that’s the concept of the story!  

Mr.GRAY (the grey guest)(who could have guessed from the name)

He’s one of Sir Belyy’s oldest employees, and benefits from a high rank in the company. But, sadly for him, he’s been stagnating lately, as newer, youngest employees seem to have Belyy’s favours, and are his prefered associates for important tasks and positions. Therefore he has Some Bitterness, Some Salt, Some Distaste, some unbriddled but professionally muted hatred for Specific people in the company. He can be an antagonistic figure, but the amount of time he spent in Belyy’s circle grants him an immense quantity of information about the man, but mostly, about his business. Anything about the company’s history, dealings, operations, he’s aware of, either having been told of them, or having snooped around to obtain, immune to being questioned due to his legitimacy in the company.

Mr.LIM (the green guest)

Remember when it was said that Gray had beef with some employees cause they were younger and rose to high ranks faster than him and became Belyy’s favourite over him? Yeah well here comes the one he hates the most for that (ofc he’s belyys fave cuz he’s Mine <3) Our lad caught Belyy’s attention for his Exploits in like, em fancy high school tournaments of smart people, it’s a thing its ridiculous, making kids compete on Smart stuff for the pride of their schools n shit, well homie Lim got clout when doing that, and Belyy was extremely interested cause that kid’s main thing was how “this young lad got mad strategic skills tf are u a war general or smth how fancy”, and that’s a coveted skill for ruthless business. So as soon as the kid is an adult, bam, join the company my dude. And because he’s just that Cool n Sexy ofc he met the expectations Belyy had, and old man Belyy got attached cuz it do be such a young lad, a kid, mentally i am adopting. That’s how you get a youngas employee becoming the right hand man of one the phatest CEO in a few years, and even make your way into being a Good Lad on top of a business partner. And that’s how you get Gray to hate your ass too. Now though, fine lad with mad strategic skills, rising to power that fast, and even infiltrating Belyy’s private life? If I were Gray I’d call suspicion there’s surely some shady stuff going no way we’re just dealing with a nice fella who just happens to work good and be friendly to the boss right?

Herra MUSTA (the black “guest”)

Belyy’s newest butler, assistant, house keeper, he multitasks. His family has been tied to Belyy’s for generations, fullfilling roles of help, but also of confidents. He’s been the head butler since only a short time, after his mother passed, and as such is still “in training” you could say, despite having served the family his whole life. There are rumours going around that the contract tying his family to the Belyys may end on his generation and need to be resigned. He known the manor by heart, and carries all keys to any locked room (and mostly, The Master Key, cause in an old house, some doors may be locked beyond all still existing keys). He also knows secrets of the family that no one else knows, but good luck getting em out of him, he’s under contract not to divulge em bro.

Mr. HASSEL (the brown guest)

Belyy’s childhood friend. They grew up together, pictured their dreams together, sworn to flourish together, worked together when starting the company, and then Hassel felt he should create his own thing instead of depending on his friend’s existing wealth, and while Belyy’s business went wild, his never took off. They still stayed very close, despite the massive difference in wealth. Belyy considers him his closest friend, the one person he can trust (fucked if hassel did the murder lemme tell u). So of course, he’s still always invited to the Prestigious meet ups where’s he’s free to feel uncomfortably out of place amongst all the rich and powerful people that he could have been a part of had he had a tiny bit of luck and a small loan from a wealthy relative...People LOVE saying he’s still hanging out with Belyy so much to leech off his wealth, cause of course they do! His bestie status means he has a whole different brand of information of Belyy than his butler does, the Most Intimate Stuff, the Childhood Stuff. The Juicy stuff ya kno...But Bro Code, its all secrets...

Sir RUZH (the red “guest”)

Deep dive into Belyy’s personnal history, the man has many employees working at his house keeping it working, clean, ya know the vibe. They live on the premice, one has a kid who’s just a Joy to be around, all the employees just vibe with that lad, he’s just a born socialite you know? Belyy gets to meet the kid, and also hella vibes with him. And because human are influenced by their feelings, he gives the kid’s mum a bit of a preferencial treatment, in the tasks she fullfils and all, til he gives her an important-as mission, and then there’s an accident n mama dies, and now Belyy got guilt and there’s this kid who just Vibes. So naturally the move is to take the kid in, and play on how his vibes are just so clean, and raise him to be the Perfect Entertainer for guests, bam, its soft power propaganda, if everyone loves your now son’s vibes, they associate them with you too. And also that’s kind of a clean rep, the selfless man who adopted his employee’s son to not have him fall to the streets, how heartwarming. Not at all traumatising for the kid too I bet! But anyway now the lad is just the most charming young adult, mission accomplished. He’s always present at any reception, ready to work his people-pleasing magic, and then going back to a gigantic empty manor to wait for the next and curate the perfect vibes to meet the expectations of dad. On the plus side, he knows everyone, and those who don’t know him cannot wAIT to, he’s just got that aura ya know. People skills for miles, and the insider knowledge that comes with being the son of the CEO, all this hidden behind the personna of the fresh innocent bashful party lad. 

Dr.FEN (the pink guest)

Do not get mistaken by the title, he’s no doc, he will not diagnose you with anything, he just studied long enough to get the sexy title. Study in what? Haha. Nothing shady. Just toxicology. He’s a world reknown poison expert basically, that’s his main thing. Oh but don’t worry, of course studying substances that may kill people is only for finding out how to cure them from it of course. What brings him in this circle? Simple, Belyy may or may not have started to suffer some weird illness that no doctor has been able to find the source, let alone cure, of. Him and Dr.Fen had met previously on some event, cause some rich man also love flexing how smart they are and attending sciencey shit, and he was contacted as sort of a shot in the dark. The lad does know how to treat some things, maybe he can treat The Mysterious Unwellness, since no traditional doctor was able to. He knows science, he’s trustworthy, bam, you’re hired to work on My Case Exclusively. Thanks to this, Dr.Fen has access to the whole health history of Belyy and his family, to many mANY dangerous substances, and also has The Respect of the hoes at the party. He HAS a doctorate after all. Epitome of knowledge. And he’s a kind to people and he wears pink like dang how can you nOT pour your wHOLE trust in him. 

Sir MOREVITCH (the blue guest)

Youngest son of an affluent family, who used to be close the the Belyys. The two families fell slightly appart after the death of the previous head of the family on the Belyy side, as they do nOT vibe with the current one (well current, til the first night of the story ig). But, unbeknownst to all, one strong link had been kept, between the youngest of the Morevitch, who dislikes his family and wishes to emancipate himself from them while also assuring his depart will not throw him basically in the streets, and our beloved Sir Belyy, who also dislikes the Morevitches but loves to see the rebellious energy of the young one (and ya know, my enemy’s enemy’s my friend or however you say that). So Belyy’s basically offering tips and helping Morevitch plant himself safely out of his family’s grasp, but it’s all taking quite some time isn’t it, slow and steady is fine until your parents try to arrange a wedding to secure more political power, and suddenly it is all quite urgent that you escape that situation because No Thank You Parents I Do Not Want A Wife I’m Too Young And Also Huh <3 Stuff You Won’t Like Hearing For Sure <3. The people who know they’re working together also know that it’s a big point of argument between them, the difference in vision between “you have to go slow and steady to be safe” and “I have very limited time to get to that safety anyway so I gotta risk it” “hell no you cant i can’t follow through if we’re going that quick that’ll put me at risk and you’re family’s gonna send gunmen to take me down”. A mess, it’d be much quicker to just obtain a few million bucks out of nowhere and bolt for sure...

Mr.GANG (the orange guest)

Morevitch’s trusted assistant. He hears the concerns, he helps the secret businesses, he lies to the parents about the whereabouts, and mostly, he’s basically a budget spy. The lad got that talent where people just don’t notice him popping behind them and catching all their dirty laundry as they confess it to someone they trust, and he always manages to break into places, get the intel he was looking for, and escape, putting everything back into place as if no one was ever there (wonder where he got all those skills from damn!). But what he’s even better at is being sneaky not only to benefit his boss, but himself as well <3. If he can catch all the info in the world, go any places, nothing’s stopping him from playing double agent and also going behind Morevitch’s back. After all the assistant life isn’t the most glamourous and rewarding, who can blame him from going and using his talents to build his own little exit route, right? Everybody sort of knows he cannot be trusted, but also no one managed to really incriminate or stop him, and as much as he has tea on many people, no has it on him, but bet once found that would be heeeella juicy.

M.MOUTARDE (the yellow guest)(this one is straight up the name of the yellow player in the french edition of clue too when i say its my main vibe)

Moutarde was an influential celebrity. He had a big break acting in a movie that the whole country stanned so hard they basically turned the script into their national anthem (they would have if it was a true democracy where the people really decide), he was so handsome and elegant, everyone’s dream husband. And then the fame fiddled out because it’s how fame is, one moment you’re the sexiest dish on the table and the next someone brings in dessert and baam, its all about that fresh cake, and no one pays any mind to your delightful aroma anymore, you’ve gone cold, they had a bite, their interest is somewhere else. Belyy really admires his work though, and mostly finds his image fits with the brand of his company, therefore the two are working on a collaboration to make Moutarde a representative. This WOULD boost Moutarde’s reputation, for his ads would be displayed on every imaginable surface of the country, and it would also benefit the company cause being represented by thAT sexy motherfucker? clearly that’s a deal. The freshness of the partnership means Moutarde is a newcomer in the guests, a fresh face, with no reputation, no relationships, no unfair biases against him. He’s just the new handsome charismatic lad with a squeaky clean image. Emphasis on “image”. After all, no one really knows anything of his background, right?

Kun.LAWENDER (the purple guest)

Private investigator, very useful to be around at a party it’s almost like it was expected there’d be a body to investigate, he’s a very close associate of Belyy, as there’s nothing more important to business than investigating the rivals and finding dirt on them to make them fall through infamy. He’s not exactly the PI who goes look for justice to be served, he’s just here for cash bro. He’s got intel on everyone, and will only let it out if offered the right thing in return (money, or sometimes other pieces of very secret intel, trade is good). Wouldn’t advise letting him and Gang team up tbh but they probably wouldnt, as Lawender is really more of a lone wolf player, going on his own for himself. The one thing that negates his usefulness as a PI on an accidental crime of scene is that even if he knew the whole truth of the event he would not spit it out unless he benefitted from saying it. He sure is a polarising lad, but at the same time, an untouchable one, he’s too knowledgeable to be taken down. Rather than sneaky, he’s extremely observant, noticing the tiniest details and engraving them in his memory, ready to be linked up to other details to deduct the big picture. He’s the upfront tea gathered basically (as opposed to Gang’s shadow tea gathering if you will, they are similar forces but using opposite methods)(also one of em got a licence n the other does not hAH).

~~~~

Now the secrets, all of em have them. One of em at least got the secret of having KILLED Belyy that’s that. But that’s to be kept for later (for if i ever use this story for more than daydream material gfhjgh) bet you can imagine what some of em may be just out of Knowing what i do, from having seen the characters in other contexts, or just because you’re a genius and reading the character profiles immediatly lit up the bulbs in your head forming the perfect theory, props to you, mad genius.

Honestly my thoughts are just how lit of a game that would be, you get to pick one hoe (maybe sum are locked til u find their secrets for juicy purposes) and you do your invetigation using your character’s perks and disadvantages, and maybe there could even be Multiple scenarios and outcomes, to spice it up, give replay value, i just think it’d be a game id spend hours on. tryin to get the spicy details of everyone’s life. walking around n digging through a rich man’s stuff, witnessing the drAMA of people fighting cause they’re locked in with a murderer and that’s stressful ngl. That or a long ass show @ netflix wanna give me a show maybe? give me hella budget we’re making it animated cause im too cultured for live action. 

whatever i make of it though, i hope i can make this story Flourish, just so that i can lay down all those secret backstories i’ve written. i want the satisfaction of throwing out the craziest secret drama between character n seeing peeps loose their minds, it just is a tasty experience.

also i gotta say, i plug the hell out of Clue for an inspo but when i was building the basics of the story my mind immediatly went “oH MY GOD THE VIBES,, THE BACKSTABBING AND tEAMING UP and all,,, its The Genius, that one tv show where peeps have to do the wildest games that require strategy n they’re in that fancy set that looks like a rich ppl mansion oh god the vibes” so yeah, i rewatched the whole first two seasons cause they’re my faves and that had an impact if only minimal in the aesthetic.

Anyway hope that quick presentation gave you a lil taste of the story, and maybe,,,, got you curious,,, craving to learn more like you never did before (im exaggerating the only real question we all got is just “so who’s fuckin with whom then how many of yall secretly dating” this the real deal)

[acidmatze]

A Fractured Sense Of Self

About one year ago I made a post about Hawks possibly having Dependend Personality Disorder since I saw so many things in him that I saw in myself.

After several talks with my therapist however it became more and more apparent that I had been close but didn't really hit the target.

I'm not here to push a diagnosis on Hawks. He's just fictional after all and I am just someone overanalysing things and not a professional of any kind.

I'm probably gonna lay out the “symptoms” or rather.... Behaviours of Borderline Personality Disorder, see if they fit Hawks and how and then try to somehow make sense of his state of mind and how it ties in with how he acts.

Trying to make sense of whatever the hell is happening in the recent chapters.

So when my therapist said “I looked some things up and I would say his behaviour fits BPD the best.” my brain immediately went to “No that can't be. Isn't that a thing teenagers have?”

Even though I Should Know Better. Damn you, media.

Ableism is so ingrained in society even people with mental illnesses themselves aren't safe.

But anyway, this isn't an essay about me doing parkour to avoid feelings and problems this is more about HAWKS doing the same.

Part 1  So what is BPD anyway?

BPD is characterized by the following signs and symptoms:

Markedly disturbed sense of identity

Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment, and extreme reactions to such.

Splitting ("black-and-white" thinking)

Impulsive or reckless behaviors (e.g., impulsive or uncontrollable spending, unsafe sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating)

Intense or uncontrollable emotional reactions that often seem disproportionate to the event or situation

Unstable and chaotic interpersonal relationships

Self-damaging behavior

Distorted self-image

Dissociation

Frequently accompanied by depression, anxiety, anger, substance abuse, or rage

Says Wikipedia

Let's see if and how Hawks fits these behaviour patterns.

(If you read this and suddenly realise “Oh shit I do stuff like that!” then please know you are in no way a horrible person. You did not choose any of these things. Stay safe cuz the world needs you.)

I'm intentionally leaving the Identity part for last.

Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment, and extreme reactions to such.

And

Splitting ("black-and-white" thinking)

I'm gonna take both points on at the same time cuz they are dependend on one another and one thing causes the other.

Why did he suddenly switch from “I don't want to fight you! I want to help you!” while looking desperate and disturbed (and meaning it!) to a pretty much emotionless “I have to kill you” (and meaning that too)?

He wanted to help Twice!

He really believes that Rehabilitation is the way to go for him.

After all, Twice is a good person and good people should have no troubles in hero society, right? Only bad people are villains, right?

If Twice is a good person he should have no problems choosing Rehabilitation and come back to the hero side, right? They are friends and that's what friends do right? Friends agree with one another, right?

And then Twice declines and insults the one thing Hawks really believes in (because he never was taught anything else).

Which caused Hawks to:

Perceive Twice as an enemy instead.

Friends agree with one another and Twice does not agree which means he is not a friend which means he is an enemy and should be killed.

Hawks (probably) has never killed before and it's not the job of a hero even. Heroes should go out of their way to avoid murder and bloodshed.

So in my opinion this sudden switch from “my friend” to “enemy” is definitely fueled by Hawks own emotions. The feeling of betrayal; not only did Twice insult the hero system he also insulted Hawks himself because Hawks cannot seperate himself from the System. As far as he perceives it they are one. It is Hawks sole identity.

It is easy for us to say there are bad heroes and good villains.

Because what is Good and what is Bad can change from situation to situation and is always dependend on circumstances.

A person can both be good and bad at the same.

A person can give lots of money to charity. We would say that's a good person.

The same person can also constantly lie to people and be unreliable towards their friends.

We would say that's a bad person.

But we know it's the same person and we all do things that are good AND bad. We all do good things. And we also have done bad things.

What I wanna say is, no person is completely black or white. We are all shades of grey.

“I really love to have Joe as a friend. He's such a great listener and we have amazing talks but he really has to come clean to his girlfriend about crashing her car.”

For Hawks, this is not so easy to understand.

In his mind a person can either be good OR bad.

All villains are bad. All heroes are good.

This ties in with his own anxiety about not solving a situation in the best possible way.

Making even one mistake is not an option. Heroes are good people and good people don't make mistakes.

He was So Close to realising that Twice is a good person even though he is a villain but one of these moments cannot undo over a decade of brainwashing.

“The contradictionary truth that things or persons can be black and white, good or bad, etc At The Same Time, seems unimaginable.”

(Fragmented Selves: Temporality and Identity in Borderline Personality Disorder by Thomas Fuchs)

Impulsive behaviour

This one is either easy or hard, depending on how you look at it.

We don't know what Hawks does in his free time and if he even has anything like such.

But reckless behaviours are basically part of his job so he probably already gets his fill there.

Intense or uncontrollable emotional reactions that often seem disproportionate to the event or situation

See his reaction towards Twice.

Unstable and chaotic interpersonal relationships

Or rather, a complete lack of any relationship whatsoever.

He either idolises people (Endeavor) or demonises them (Twice right now).

One could argue that as of now Hawks is completely incapable or forming any sort of emotional connection. He himself says he doesn't get attached, sees it as a weakness. For me it sounds like a defense mechanism.

He Did get attached to Twice and we saw how that played out.

But Hawks getting hurt over and over is a self-fulfilling prophecy. Thinking of someone as either completely good or completely bad does little to aid a friendship.

Endeavor’s abuse getting exposed would probably cause Hawks to go through a crisis. He idolises Endeavor. In his eyes Endeavor can do no wrong.

Normally I would say this is something that must be avoided at any cost but in Hawks case, it is probably a necessary step to help him break the lock of his golden cage.

Self-damaging behavior

“If corrupting myself is enough to put everyone at ease then I will gladly take on this job”, anyone?

Hawks sending all his feathers to Endeavor to help him anyone?

When is this bird NOT hurting himself?

There are many ways to self-harm and this is Hawks way to do it.

Isn't it convenient that nobody would question is since he's just doing his job?

Distorted self-image

Goes hand in hand with the very first point which I wanna do last, just in case it gets really really long.

Dissociation

To be honest, I couldn't find any signs of that in Hawks. If someone of you can, just correct me.

Frequently accompanied by depression, anxiety, anger, substance abuse, or rage

Hawks seems to vaguely know that something is going wrong in his life and he absolutely does not like his circumstances.

He wishes to be free.

When he looked at Twice and smiled and said “A cage is not where I belong” it seemed to me like he looked more pained than genuinely joking.

He mentions drinking alcohol after work so this could or could not mean anything.

Maybe he wishes he could get smashed after work?

Who knows.

But he is definitely depressed and tries to cover it with jokes. Some depressed people joke even more the worse they feel.

Seriously, his interactions with Twice seemed to be the most genuine ones, where he was/is the most vulnerable.

The jovial, easygoing, chatty Hawks is a lie. A lie he has forced himself to believe in.

A role he has to play. But he played it for so long he forgot that it is just a role in a play and not real.

Part 2 Hawks must die

Okay, that sounds really harsh. I promise it's just a metaphorical death. I'm side-eyeing Horikoshi so hard right now.

Now we will take a look at his identity, or lack of one.

Lately what I really was reminded of was this “Inner child” thing.

We only caught glimpses of Hawks as a literal child. He probably grew up in an unstable home. Probably had no one really looking after him, why else would such a young child roam around the city alone so freely that it has the chance to help in a car crash?

He didn't look much older than 6 or 8.

The Hero Commission discovered him and took him in and “provided for his entire family”.

What happened was that he was apparently completely removed from his family and was put into a clinical environment, cold, not suited for children at all, hell probably barely suited for any human being.

Hawks remembers that even as a child he was taught interrogation techniques. Espionage.

From a very young age he was taught to leave himself behind. To mold himself into whatever he needs to be to complete the mission. To be a chameleon. A mirror. Just a reflection of what others expect him to be.

He has to be A so he becomes A. He has to be B now so he ignores he ever was A and is B now.

He has to be Hawks so Takami Keigo becomes Hawks and leaves himself behind.

The last time he was Takami Keigo was when he was a child.

Change is a normal part in humans. It's very important during puberty. That's why teenagers experiment with it so much.

“Oh, it's just a phase” sneer the adults when the teen wears only black and say thats the “Real me”. In a few months the same teen probably tries something else.

That's a good and normal thing. Even as adults we are constantly changing and adapting.

But we never forget the person we once were. We stay connected to it, maybe remember it fondly and think of the friends we found that way.

Or sometimes we look back and cringe because “Wow, my parents really let me go outside like this?”

It forms one fluent narrative. All these changes are still us. We know that we are the same person as we were last year even if last year's us was completely different from today's us.

Hawks doesn't have this continuity.

He became Hawks and wasn't allowed any further change and he also wasn't allowed to be Takami Keigo at the same time. He is a tool to be used.

Takami Keigo is a frightened child. A child that made a decision and thought he did well and now this decision is his downfall.

Takami Keigo was never allowed to grow up. He was pushed away, so he can be Hawks instead, probably as an attempt to gain approval, to be praised, to be liked.

Hawks is an amazing actor, likeable, chatty, funny and witty, very competent at his job and smart.

Takami Keigo is a scared child.

If Hawks stops being Hawks there is nothing he can go back to.

Normally people with Borderline ofc also go through “phases” as everyone else does but instead of putting them all into a single narrative and file them all away under “That's me” every phase is it's own seperate story.

All energy is put into one “phase” as much as neurotypicals do but once this phase is over there is nothing that comes after it. When people without Borderline change “phases” we know a “home” we can revert to while we change. Our Self still exists in us wether we are currently obsessing about Ballett or Comics or Dinosaurs or Architecture or whatever.

For someone like Hawks theres either Ballet or comics or dinosaurs or whatever. No neutral spot. You are either the person who puts all their energy into becoming an archaeologist or you're nothing. Being something gives you a goal to work towards to. It tells you who to talk to, what to talk about, what to do in your free time etc.

Hawks being Hawks gives him a goal, a worldview, things to believe in, topics to talk about, a job, people to talk to, opinions to have etc. It gives him an identity, ready-made and easy to consume.

He cannot be anything else but Hawks. He is nothing beyond that.

Takami Keigo plays Hawks, they are not one and the same person.

He is Hawks but Hawks isn't Takami Keigo.

Takami Keigo holds no opinion of his own, no worldview, no goal, no hobbies, nothing.

Hawks has to die so Takami Keigo can heal. So the frightened child can finally grow up.

[miracleboiz]

Making a Home Ch. 1

Kita Shinsuke had experienced a lot in life. He had been raised with his grandmother, a loving foster parent and for some time he followed in her foot steps before finding his own path. He thought his foster care license had expired before getting a call at three am with two small boys thrust into his arms. Miya Osamu and Atsumu, from broken homes but still fighting. Thirty days before his license expires. Thirty days to make a choice, keep the boys or let them be separated into different homes. Thirty days to fall in love with them.

Words: 4k

Relationships: Gen

Warnings: Mention of past child abuse, non-graphic abuse

Not from Kita, but it is mentioned. I will post any warnings before any panic attacks or vague descriptions of abuse.

Read below or on AO3

When Kita Shinsuke had gotten the call from his friend in social services he wasn’t sure what to expect. It certainly wasn’t a request to meet Oomimi at a police station at three am.

Even as he made his way down the halls his mind whirled with thoughts, trying to figure out what was going on that couldn’t wait till morning. For a second he was struck with the idea that Akagi had been arrested, before remembering that he wasn’t in the country so that wasn’t possible. Besides, he probably would have been the one to call Shinsuke and laugh his ear off about it.

“Oomimi.” He called as he spotted his tall friend, towering over everyone as he leaned against a desk. Shinsuke glanced at the officer sitting at the desk, taking in the black messy hair and sharp yellow eyes. He hadn’t dealt with him before but he’d heard good things about him.

“Ah, good, you’re here Kita.” Oomimi pushed off the desk, his normally blank face twisted into an unhappy frown as he stepped up to his old friend. “Sorry to call you this late, nobody else is available.”

“Available for what exactly?” 

“Emergency foster care.” Kuroo said quietly as he moved to his feet and extended a hand towards Shinsuke. “Kuroo Tetsurou.”

“Kita Shinsuke.” Shinsuke shook it as he turned back to Oomimi, trying not to be surprised. He waited patiently for the explanation, Oomimi would blurt out everything eventually.

“You’re the only one in the area that is already licensed and you’ve done emergency work before.”

“That was only for a few days and I still had notice before the raid. There are other foster care around here, why me?” Shinsuke pointed out, looking at Kuroo. The police officer looked exhausted as he grabbed a thick folder and offered it to Shinsuke. Medical files.

Shinsuke grabbed them and flipped through the two files, anger and disgust rolling in his stomach as he read through. Years and years of abuse building up to broken hearts and terrified kids.

“Why was this not reported?”

“It was… First and second homes were both busted for abuse and ever since the two have been thrown from foster care to foster care.” Oomimi put in, holding up his own file. “Normally they wouldn’t have been. But they wanted to stay together and when they tried to seperate them because a family wanted to adopt the younger brother…”

Kuroo grabbed his own file, thinner but it was a police report. He let it fall open on his hand and show its contents. Two photographs were paper clipped to the page. One of a man’s arm with a bite mark, the other was a small pale child with black hair and a multitude of bruises down the side of his face.

“Atsumu, the one you see, tried to run after his brother and when he was pulled away he bit his guardian. Who proceeded to do what you see here. The would be adoptees called the police and we intervened before it got any worse.”

“The adoptees decided to cancel the adoption, saying they don’t trust Osamu, his brother, not to be violent too.”

“A little boy is beaten for reacting to his brother being ripped away and they call him violent….” Shinsuke sighed, shaking his head. “So when you said no one else was available you meant…”

“That you’re the only one I trust to take care of these boys and not make it even worse for them. And the fact that nobody wants to take him in after he bit his last guardian.” Oomimi nodded, leaning back against the desk again.

“We’re friends, doesn’t that mean you can’t decide to put them with me?”

“That’s why I called in a professional. He worked with you before, with your other kids and he is kind of smitten with you.” Oomimi’s lips twitched at Shinsuke’s blank face.

“We’re both professionals, why do you do this to me? Why haven’t I earned a rest?” Another voice sounded as Moniwa Kaname hurried into the room, breathing heavily as if he had just run a marathon. He groaned and bent over to breathe in, waving papers at Oomimi’s hips until the man took them.

“Got all the paperwork, and the approval… and the checks passed. Good gods don’t ever make me have to call our lawyer this early in the morning again, I thought he was going to kill me through the phone.” Kaname continued, smiling painfully at Shinsuke before gratefully falling into the chair Kuroo grabbed for him.

“Wow… Moniwa-sama you should get paid for this work.” Oomimi drawled, turning his head so only Shinsuke could see the smile lifting his lips. Moniwa just groaned, rubbing his eyes.

“You’re taking him too right? Feel free to leave him in any nearby garbage cans like a stray cat.” Moniwa finally straightened, smiling tiredly at Kita. All three of them looked exhausted actually and Kita couldn’t help but wonder how long they’d been fighting with the agency to get the boys a place to stay for a while.

“Where are the boys?” Shinsuke asked, carefully reading down the medical files in front of him. There were a few things he would have to be careful about and he wondered if he had time to run to the store, probably not. He’d have to go tomorrow then, with the boys probably… 

“With Kenma.” Kuroo said, pointing to a room off down the hall. Shinsuke nodded, putting down the files and taking up a pen.

He took the chair Oomimi offered and started to sign through everything, quietly talking with him and Kaname over the process. For now it was an emergency foster situation while they looked for a more permanent solution, but after this incident they weren’t sure when they would be able to find a home for both boys.

Kita wasn’t sure about taking them in for longer than a month, he had a job he worked long hours in, a grandmother he was looking out for, and his own plans for life that hadn’t involved two children. He was only a licensed foster caregiver because he had taken after his grandmother and thought he wanted to help kids the same way she had, since then however Shinsuke had only had three kids in his house.

Two of them had been emergencies, needing a place to be safe in for a few days while their parents had been flown in after their aunt had gotten drunk and crashed her car and couldn’t leave the hospital. The other had stayed with Shinsuke for almost three months after a drug raid had put her parents in prison, she was adopted by her uncle soon after and was gone before the final month ended.

It had been a long time, Shinsuke could admit, and she had left his house a lot better than she had come in. Maybe that’s why they were asking him, he had a history with abused kids and he knew how to handle and help them. Plus his grandmother had been a foster mom for years and he had helped her with it, only retiring now since she couldn’t see.

Since then it had been nearly two years, Shinsuke honestly thought his license had expired after not renewing it when his business took off. His house was still mostly child proof however, and the rooms were set up, they needed new sheets but that could be fixed easily. He did own his business so he could always hire more help while caring for the two kids. It wasn’t exactly the best situation but he would feel a lot better if the kids stayed with him instead of being left overnight at a police station until they found someone willing to help them.

“I’m going to need to call someone to-” Shinsuke started only to blink when Oomimi smiled and shook his head. Suspicion ran through him and he narrowed his eyes.

“Check your phone.”

Shinsuke debated on running home before he pulled out his phone with a sigh. The only person in the world who could get Oomimi that ecstatic was-

One new message from Digging Fox

Akagi.

Hey bro! Ren hit me up an hour ago and told me you’d need my help, how's it look?

Picture Attached.

Shinsuke pulled up the picture, ignoring the urge to roll his eyes at Akagi posed between the twin mattresses in the extra bedroom. The sheets had been added and a plastic cover was tucked underneath them and a fluffy duvet was on each of them, and next to the pillow was Akagi’s ‘special’ touch. Two stuffed foxes stared blankly at the camera as Shinsuke turned up to his friend.

“Why is it always foxes?”

“He has major issues,” Oomimi said simply, “but he is reliable.”

“How did he get back from Cambodia so quickly?”

“Oh he got back yesterday, he was just crashing at my place while looking for another apartment.”

“Perhaps if he stopped leaving the country for months on end, he wouldn’t have to worry about not having an apartment to come back to.” Shinsuke sighed fondly. Akagi had always been a wild soul, atleast he would eventually make his way back home as long as Shinsuke kept a key for him.

“Yeah but you know him. If he’s not off being a photographer, he’s writing his books, and if he’s not writing his books he’s working as a translator, and if he’s not doing that, then he’s a virtual assistant. Then again… you are the only one he’s ever listened to, you could probably get him to settle down.” Shinsuke hummed at the idea, scribbling his signature on the last piece of paperwork.

“Not yet. He’s not in danger or running out of money, he just gets bored too easily and is too curious. If he doesn’t settle down by the time we’re thirty two then I’ll say something, but I don’t think a desk job is his future. If he is truly happy with odd jobs and he can support himself then there isn’t really anything for me to say is there? I’m proud of him for taking his life into his own hands.”

“Can you say that again, so I can record it? The great Kita Shinsuke, proud of someone. You’d make the old team cry.” Oomimi said, wiping away a fake tear as he held out his phone. Against his will, Shinsuke’s lips twitched up and he shook his head at him. The ‘Great’ Kita Shinsuke. Oomimi could be ridiculous sometimes, but Kita loved him regardless, there was a reason they were still best friends even six years out of highschool.

“Where are the boys? It’s late and I don’t want to make them wait any longer than they have to.” Shinsuke pushed out of his chair, handing the medical files to Oomimi. “You can carry these while I get the boys.”

“See Moniwa? Stone cold. Stone. Cold.” Oomimi whispered to Moniwa who just sighed softly.

Kuroo stood after scribbling something down on a notepad and moved down the hall, waving Shinsuke after him. He slowed down until they were side by side and leaned over to talk to him.

“They’re a little frightened right now but Kenma got them to calm down by playing games. Osamu was asleep last time I checked in but I don’t think Atsumu will sleep until they’re actually at home. I tried to get them to eat something but Atsumu was too wired and refused to leave his brother alone for more than a few seconds and Osamu wasn’t feeling well.” Kuroo explained, watching Shinsuke nod with the same neutral face. Kuroo had seen a lot of foster parents but never one so cold looking, if it hadn’t been Moniwa vying for him Kuroo might have refused to hand them over.

They rounded a corner and stepped into the first room on the left, pausing in the doorway.

The brothers were pressed up against an older man, who Shinsuke assumed was Kenma. He had a computer on his lap, turned slightly so the awake brother could tap away at the game with one hand. The other brother was asleep, arm stretched over Kenma’s lap so his hand could hold onto his brother’s on the other side.

The two looked up as Shinsuke stepped in, leaving Kuroo at the doorway. The awake brother pressed closer to Kenma, hand gripping his brother’s so tight he squirmed unhappily until he loosed his grip.

Shinsuke moved slowly across the empty room until he could crouch down by Kenma’s feet. The one watching him still had the black and blue bruises down his cheek, eyes averted for a moment before coming back and glaring at him, fear obvious.

“You must be Atsumu, I’m Kita Shinsuke.” Shinsuke said, smiling just a little when he nodded. Atsumu’s gray eyes were staring him down like a wild animal, but his hand was firmly clasped on his brother’s. He was a little shaky, probably running on nothing but anxiety and adrenaline which was still a surprise that his little body was awake at all, but he might have slept at the hospital.

“Do you know what’s going on?”

“... You’re going to take me somewhere right?” Atsumu said with a bit of jostling from Kenma. Kenma’s own gold eyes flashed as they watched Shinsuke, just as deciphering and calculating as Oikawa’s and nearly as protective.

“I’m taking you and your brother.” Shinsuke corrected, anger rolling in his chest at the shocked look on Atsumu’s face. It was one of the things he despised about the foster care system, how could you rip away two siblings from each other. Especially when at the end of the day they only had each other they could rely on.

“Me and…”

“You and Osamu, yes. You’re both going to stay with me for a little while, maybe a long while.”

“Till you get tired of us right?” Atsumu spat, a sudden viciousness in his eyes even as they drooped with exhaustion. Shinsuke didn’t flinch but moved to sit on his ankles instead of crouching.

“Until we can find a home that is willing to raise both of you as brothers, not take you away from each other. I know it’s frustrating moving from place to place, but with me, you will stay under my care until we have a permanent solution. Even if that takes a long time. You might get tired of me though, I have been told I am very boring.” Shinsuke said evenly, kids didn’t like being talked down too, even at the young age of six. He remembered when adoptees and other foster parents came to see his grandmother, they always looked down on him and he’d despised it. Being young just meant inexperienced not unintelligent.

“You’re not… you’re not going to give Osamu away?”

“No I’m not. I won’t give you away either.” Atsumu studied him, drawing his eyes over his clothes and hair and crossing his arms. Though Shinsuke noticed he didn’t release his brother for a second.

“You don’t look boring.” Atsumu said, as if he was catching Kita in a lie.

“I am wearing my pajamas. It is three am, it is what most people wear this early in the morning. Normally I am very well put together.”

“You definitely sound boring.”

“I did warn you.” Shinsuke said simply as Atsumu humphed and watched him again. Shinsuke just watched him back until the curse of being six and unstimulated came to haunt Atsumu and he wiggled.

“What?”

“What what?” Shinsuke hummed, Atsumu’s face twisting in confusion.

“What?”

“Are you ready to go home Atsumu?” Shinsuke asked softly, noting the fingers that tightened out of fear and stress. Perhaps home wasn’t the best word. “I have beds ready for you so your brother doesn't have to sleep on the floor, and I can make breakfast in a few hours.”

“I don’t really have a choice do I?” 

Shinsuke debated on lying before he moved to his feet and offered a hand to Atsumu. Atsumu definitely seemed the type to definitely ask for the other choices if given half a chance, so there wasn’t a point.

“Not really.”

“.... You don’t lie much do you?”

“No.”

“..... Weirdo.” Atsumu tried to whisper it to Kenma but Shinsuke could hear it easily. Despite that, Atsumu reached up and grabbed his hand, pulling himself up with all the strength in his tiny body. His hand stayed with his brother’s, pulling Osamu up at a weird angle. Osamu didn’t even flinch, happily asleep.

“Can I carry your brother so he can keep sleeping?” Shinsuke asked. Fear flitted through Atsumu’s gaze before he looked at his brother sleeping peacefully. With a sigh he dropped Kita’s hand and nodded.

“Don’t drop him.” Atsumu ordered as Kita gently lifted up the sleeping twin. Both of Osamu’s arms wrapped around his neck subconsciously and Kita moved him to his hip.

“Would you like to hold onto my hand or your brother?” The offer definitely took Atsumu by surprise because his jaw dropped and a resounding intelligent “uhhhhhhhhhh” came from his mouth.

“I… Don’t… know….” Atsumu seemed completely unbalanced by the offer so Kita simply took his hand again. It would be a simple matter to move Atsumu’s hand to his brother and Shinsuke didn’t want them to risk being injured on the ride home.

“Would you like to say goodbye to Kenma-san?”

“Kenma-kun! Bye!” Atsumu definitely jumped on that offer and Shinsuke could see Kenma’s lips twisting into a fond smile as he said his own goodbye and followed them at a much slower pace.

Once they were out of the room, Atsumu’s hand tightened on Shinsuke’s as if afraid he was going to be passed on to one of the other adults in the room.

“Oomimi, do you want to drop the files off tomorrow then? My hands are a little full.” 

“One could say that, yes.” Oomimi said dryly, amusement shining in his eyes at the blank look he received. “You have a way with kids.”

“Well. I did raise Akagi for the past nine years, so I suppose I’m experienced in dealing with small children.”

“Y’know, I didn’t have to come pick you up.” Akagi snorted, stepping out from behind Oomimi. “Kita-san~”

Shinsuke just shook his head slightly at him, gently squeezing Atsumu’s hand when he pressed against his leg. The child looked up at him but didn’t say anything, letting go of Kita’s hand to grab onto his brother’s pant leg instead.

Akagi’s grin shrunk slightly as he waved at Atsumu. He looked the same as he always did. Wild untamed hair piled on and wide eyes with a permanent smile on his lips. He was dressed in a purple knitted sweater that Shinsuke recognized as Oomimi’s, and tan slacks that were his own. Sometimes Shinsuke wondered if Akagi’s fox motif should have been a crow since he spent so much time scavenging for items in his friend’s drawers. Or perhaps it fit right in with that feral gleam in his eyes after all.

“I didn’t ask you to do that. But I do appreciate it, do you have booster seats for the boys?” Shinsuke said, nodding his head at him in greeting.

“Of course! I told you I would always have your back right? Captain~”

“.... Can we get the boys home? It’s late and they’re exhausted, Osamu isn’t even twitching at all this noise.” Shinsuke sighed, glancing worriedly down at the boy. He wasn’t too hot or cool, but it was suspicious that he hadn’t woken while being picked up.

“Osamu’s just like that. He doesn’t wake up for nothin’.” Atsumu said quietly, flinching when all the eyes landed on him. He squared his shoulders and glared back, hand clutching Osamu’s pants like it was a lifeline.

“You’re tired too, Atsumu. You need your rest.” Shinsuke said softly, gently lowering his hand on Atsumu’s shoulder. He flinched again, but didn’t glare at him or pull away, just allowed himself to be led down the hall.

“If you need anything else, please call me tomorrow, until then, good night Oomimi, Moniwa-san, Kuroo-san, Kenma-san.” Shinsuke said as he passed them, slowing down enough for Akagi to skip in front of him and lead him out.

“Whose this? What are you a captain in?” Atsumu mumbled, eyes on the leather jacket Akagi was pulling on over the sweater. A bedazzled red fox glinted under the hallways lights and Shinsuke wondered vaguely where he had gone wrong with Akagi. Atsumu, on the other hand, was fascinated by it despite his eyes trying to slide shut.

“That’s Akagi Michinari, we went to highschool together. I used to be captain of the volleyball team with him, so he still calls me that sometimes.”

“Oh…” Atsumu yawned then shook his head violently, trying to stay awake.

Shinsuke debated on his strength before gently tapping Atsumu’s shoulder. When he looked up Kita offered his arm.

“Can I carry you to the car?” He asked and Atsumu shook his head before yawning and face planting against Shinsuke’s hip.

“Don’t wanna fall asleep. Can’t lose Osamu.” Atsumu insisted.

“You’ll be right here with Osamu, let me carry you. You don’t want your brother to sleep alone do you?” When Atsumu agreed Shinsuke squatted and wrapped an arm around his waist and hoisted him onto his other hip. Atsumu wrapped one arm around his brother and the other around Shinsuke’s neck with his brother’s hand. It took a moment to get his arm under Atsumu’s rear so he could support more of his weight, but he started walking again when he could.

Akagi snapped a photo when he turned around and Shinsuke stared at him. Nine years of friendship worked against him however and Akagi just laughed quietly. Shinsuke’s own lips twitched up at the sound. It had been eight months since he’d last seen Akagi, it was nice to see him again and know he was safe.

“I knew you had to be keeping up at the gym, Mr. I don’t go to the gym.” Akagi whispered over at him and Shinsuke rolled his eyes at him.

“You asked me over two years ago recently Sugawara-san has been inviting me along with him and his husband, they both seemed surprised that I am familiar with weight training despite me telling them I used to be in volleyball. I suppose that is to be expected, I am slim after all.”

“.... You’re boring, do something exciting. Blow up a car, burn a man, kiss Suga-san.”

“I’m sure Sugawara-san wouldn’t mind, however I don’t see the purpose. Besides, I left my house thinking you got arrested and now I have two kids, I don’t think there is much more that can top this… ‘excitement,’” Shinsuke hummed, hushing Osamu when he started to stir. He didn’t seem to mind and the quiet confusion dropped off immediately into a soft snore, Atsumu seemed to be right. Osamu was just like that.

“..... You’re the worst, boss, the absolute worst.” Akagi sighed, leading them to the car. He opened the back door and took Osamu from Shinsuke, hand cradling the back of his head while he strapped him into the booster seat. Osamu didn’t mind, completely oblivious to the world as he snored quietly.

Atsumu woke a little when Shinsuke tried to put him on the other side, latching on with a tired whine.

“I know you’re very sleepy and I am very warm, but you’ll be much more comfortable in your seat next to your brother. You’ll be able to hold onto him and be safe, and you won’t have to worry about a crash because Akagi is a very good driver, atleast when I’m in the car with him.” Shinsuke said, gently removing his hands and buckling him into the seat. He lifted Atsumu’s hand and placed it over Osamu’s, a smile crawling onto his face when they both immediately held on.

“Wow.” Akagi breathed, staring at Shinsuke when he lifted his gaze to him curiously. His eyes were shining for some reason and Shinsuke couldn’t help but frown at him.

“What?”

“Nothing, nothing.”

“Whenever you say that, it’s not actually nothing you’re just thinking something weird and inappropriate and don’t want me to get onto you.”

“And yet, you manage just fine without even knowing what I was thinking.” Akagi groaned, closing the door carefully and sliding into the driver’s side. “Let's get you home.”