#like do we think I can wear this with a trench to a very nice restaurant

[teethpaste]

Trying on outfits for my tokyo work trip - I am going 100% solo, gonna have my lost in translation moment I swear 2 god

[where-does-the-heart-lie]

Revolutionary Army Punk AU

Ft: Luffy (not punk)

Steampunk is cool but i think just straight up punk would be cooler. I just think what they stand for lines up a lot better

Design notes:

I did some research and talked to a punk friend of mine for these as i am not a punk, myself, and I dont want to look like a poser. I think i did a really good job translating them and i want to explain my thoughts!

Sabo was first, of course.

I not only wanted to make the characters punk, but i also wanted to crank their designs up about 20 notches, so i gave Sabo’s scar one hell of an upgrade. In this version I tried to make it very clear that that cannon ball hit him head-on. I think it works really well with his punk vibes because under-cuts and shaved parts of the head in general are very popular in punk culture.

I largely tried to keep the silhouettes the same with this au, and It was really easy to keep it with Sabo because of the fact that he already has a lot of design elements that translate well to punk. His big pants into tall boots were perfect to translate, crust pants and steel toed boots fits him well. Trench coats arent a staple in Punk, but i couldnt take the coats away from him… him or Belo. They deserve it…

I threw away his cravat for a choker, i replaced his vest with a red tank top and his undershirt for fishnets, Patches up the wazoo, he looks very cool.

Belo Betty was next, she was super easy to translate. She’s already in the punk spirit with her tits out, we love to see it. Her hat was really difficult to translate, along with all the other hats, but a red knitted hat that has those two points cuz it’s essentially a scarf sewed together looks nice on her.

My punk friend suggested i give her a bunch of nets and harnesses and i really agreed that was her style, so i gave her red tie to Morley, slapped some harnesses on her and just overall just turned her sexy up like 50 notches. I think i was clever how i adapted her striped stockings here with how they have runs in them.

Karasu is almost the exact same. I just threw out his dinky little cravat and gave him a bandana and harness. I also gave him piercings. That’s the only difference. In the words of my Punk friend “hes naked and wearing a spiked mask, He can hang”

Speaking of what my punk friend said, he said that Lindbergh would get “demolished” in the pit, and that he looks like he’s scared of bees. The consensus was that he couldn’t hang. But also i still had to make him punk, so then he suggested CBGB punks:

Redneck, bluegrass, southern american punks. I was really in a rut with his design, I didn’t know what to do to keep the silhouette of his backpack. But everything changed when I chance got the idea of a guitar. And then everything flowed from there

Morley was really really fun. Punk friend suggested i make him Pop Punk, inspired by this pic

Mainly Lindsey way with this plaid skirt and tie

He was so so fun to draw, i love his fucked up eyes.

For dragon, i didnt change much at all, even though it’s only his bust that’s shown. Imagine everything is the same, except now he has piercings. Dragon isnt concerned with the punk fashion, but the punk cause.

For Luffy, I wasnt trying to make him punk, but he felt a bit plain looking like base Luffy next to punk Sabo, so i just did the “turn design up 20 notches”, and just gave him a more visibly tattered hat, bangles and waist beads.

That’s about it! Ive been getting a lot of comments and asks lately saying that you guys like when i go on my design explanations, and i realized that i didnt do that for the last few AU’s, so i thought id type this up :)

Thank you for reading!

[libraryraccoon]

The Aeon Of Creation : Surprise ?

P1 (here) -> P2 (coming soon)

TW : English isn't my first language, bad english. Spoil Penacony quests.

Gender : Male/GN

Pronouns used : He/They

Info : I was sad when I haven't found any hsr sahsr au, so I decided to write one.

There was an Aeon that everyone know in the universe.

The first Aeon that have been appeared, The Aeon Of Creation.

It’s said that The Aeon Of Creation was the first being that had appear, that it’s them that have create the universe, the worlds, and that have created the others Aeons. That it’s them that say who can be an Aeon.

But no one has seen them for a while now. Even the others Aeons were worried, even Nanook.

It’s only decades later that a trailblazer saw them.

<----->

His name was Caelus, he was in a dream at Penacony when he meet them.

They seems so familiar, but also they seems like a stranger.

“Excuse me.” Said the grey hair, looking at the h/c hair. “Have we met before ?”

They had h/l h/c hair, e/c, s/c, and they were wearing a white shirt with a sleeveless sweater on top, a trench coat, black pants and shoes.

They had a men body, and they look like a men in every way. But, more Caelus was watching them, more they don’t seems to be human, and more they remember him someone- but he don’t know who.

It was.. strange.

“Maybe yes, maybe no.. Who know ?” ask the person-thing. “I'm sorry, I have a bad memory."

They were lying, Caelus didn’t know how, but he just know it.

He hate when people lie to him.

“I’m Y/N and my pronouns are he/him. Just a person traveling in the universe. Nice to meet you.” He introduced himself lifting his hat a little in a sort of reverence- since when did he have a hat ?!

Caelus ask no question -he was used to things like that.

“I’m Caelus, a nameless.” He said, Compared to usual, he didn't make a joke or show off like he usually did. He didn’t really think about it at that moment.

<----->

Caelus was often with Y/N.

They was what we can called ‘best friend’.

Every time Caelus was in Penacony, he would go straight to Y/N.

Y/N gave off a sort of comforting and familiar aura. One that he found difficult to part with. Maybe the reason he clung so tightly to his friend was to avoid a repeat of Firefly, to protect him. Caelus didn't know, and he didn't search for an answer, focusing on the present.

“Caelus ! Do attention ! I swear one day you will die soon if you continue like that !” His friend swore as Caelus passed on the road to join him, not paying attention to the passing cars, almost being run over by one.

Caelus only give a nervous laugh at that.

<----->

Being the Aeon of Creation for them was boring.

They knew everything, having nothing to learn. That annoyed them. They wanted to learn, to discover things.

But with their creations worshiping them, some much, MUCH, more than others, it was impossible. So they took a human form and visited the planets, the worlds, that they had created from another point of view.

<----->

Humans were very attached to all this gender and sex stuff, so they took on a masculine appearance and he/him pronouns. Like that, they really look like the other humans ! Well, except for their blood. They had a blood that was like the universe, no, that was like their blood was the universe ! Just like their tears. And it's never touching the ground, disappearing in the air. They had to be careful for not being hurt or crying in front of people (but why and how they know their tears colors ?)

They was travelling alone until they meet him.

He was a boy with short grey hair and yellow eyes. His name was Akivili.

They traveled the universe together, in the Express.

Akivili was their first friend, their first best friend,

Their first love.

They were really closed, and the Aeon realized too late that they were falling for him.

The day they wanted to confess, Akivili disappeared.

The Aeon of Creation have done all for finding him, but always in a human form, they didn’t want people to realize who they was.

And, one day, in a dream they meet someone that look like Akivili.

His name was Caelus, a nameless, just like Akivili.

The Aeon of Creation thought that maybe, just maybe, he was Akivili, a reincarnation, or a descendant of him. They were sure the two were related.

Especially that he have the name Akivili wanted to give to his son.

The day before the Creator turn Akivili into an Aeon.

“Hey, if one day you have a kid, what name will you give them ?” ask Akivili.

“Huh- I don’t know ?” said the Aeon confused. They thought about how everyone always gives two names to this question, one feminine and one masculine. “Aether if it’s a boy and Stelle if it’s a girl.”

“Great names. You’re always creatives for names.” Said the mortal.

“And you ?”

“Caelus if it’s a boy and Lumine if it’s a girl.” Akivili answer easily.

Akivili always had something for picking great name.

It’s him who gave them the name Y/N after all. 

So, for knowing who really Caelus was, they decided to stay with him.

Of what they had understood, he lost a dear friend, so Y/N helped him at the same time with all his grief thing.

And that worked ! Well, in a way ?

Caelus was feeling better now that Y/N was here, but he was what mortals called ‘clingy’.

The Aeon found that funny – Akivili was always clingy with them when he was tired. So that make them think of the past.

They was happy to compare Caelus to Akivili, making some theories about it, and not to some creep that prayed them..

Maybe The Aeon Of Creations have what mortals called a trauma caused by a few of their believers.

<----->

The Aeon Of Creation is traumatized of all this Sagau imposter AU/j I thought making the creator having a universe color blood and tears will be funny because, you know, they created it- The Creator thinking Caelus is Akivili is an idea that would hurt when it will be more developed.

[stormoflina]

Outfit pics are back, time for my favourite post, lessgoo

disclaimer: opinions

Sigh, so the thing with Dominik is that you can't judge his outfits using parameters like taste or sense of style, you have to apply his very own little Domi scale to rate it, otherwise we are in the trenches.

With that in mind, I can appreciate that he is finally not wearing the rope laces, not that these ones are any better sadly. Bag, plain ugly. But you know what, hot take, but I kinda like this set. On the Domi scale it's a 6.5/10, 3/10 in the normal.

Will we ever see Ryan in something else, other than plain, monochrome sweats? Not feeling the navy either, I think the warmer tones look nicer on him. And those shoes look like the ones you can buy in Aldi, I'm sorry. It's safe, it's boring, can't give a number higher than 4/10.

Only Cody could wear Prada and still serve millennial dad core. 😭 Yet again, his height and face card saves him tho, he just looks clean and put together, as always. The shoes are nice, I guess. 5/10, because I'm bored!!

Listen, Stefan usually serves, but this is not a flattering picture. 😭 He loves his flowy, baggy pants, but this one is just not it. I like the chunky shoes tho, and the jacket and baseball cap, it's fun, youthful, he looks cute. 7.5/10

Nike and Adidas monochrome sweatsets? How original! I'm giving them 5/10 each, because I love them, not because they look good. I mean they do, just not the outfits.

Hot take: I don't like puffer jackets, so we are already a few points behind. Still, Virgil is just so effortlessly cool (despite clearly also putting effort into it yk), I just can't help but like it. 😭 Layering king, shoes are nice, hair is on point, pose is great... Typical Virgil aura. 8/10

Uhm, Macca, put your ankles away you, you w*h*ore. Yeah, this is not it, very much 2010s business bro vibes. It's something Ali would wear. 😭 And it's not your fault Macca, but I have trauma from men in shiny puffy vests. The maté kit is cute tho. 4.5/10

Don't judge me, but I like this okay. Idk, he looks so soft and cozy in the jumper and I like how the top matches the shoes. And his black leather maté kit is a serve too. But maybe it's just Darwin's good looks that make me say 7/10.

Here comes Wataru, saving the day again. Not his best fit, but he still looks sharp and so well put together, despite taking a more causal approach. I love a man in well-fitted clothes and these jeans look great on him! I don't really like the shoes, but other than that it's a casual 7/10.

[wayfayrr]

aaaaaaahhh all i can think of is like- most isekai fics I've seen for some reason [i mean understandably] the reader is wearing their pajamas, but after visiting the modern world they can finally show the chain what they actually like wearing, [i can see this going in so many ways, depending on who is reacting, and especially depending on what aesthetic the reader likes to dress in. for the sake of the request ill keep it as dark academia, cause i love it so muchhhh [not so much in the summer, but i make it work lol] with time? [just imagining reader with a tie and just wearing business casual w a trenchcoat frrrrrrrr- might draw this kind of thing and send it to you lol]

Anon I hope you know this ask had me in an absolute chokehold. OUJDFNBJNF ✨I LIVE FOR DARK ACADEMIA AESTHETICS!!!✨ My trenchcoat is one of my favourite things I own. So I get your pain in summer as well 🥹

“Hey Time, have you seen Wild anywhere? He borrowed my laptop and I really need it back.”

“I haven’t sorry [nam]-... Is that what you wear normally? You look incredible.”

“Pretty much, yeah? Why, is there an issue with it?”

Time’s blushing. Is what I’m wearing really that impressive because I know he’s not blushing over what I’m wearing being revealing. A trenchcoat that goes down to my calves with the rest of my clothes? Does he just think I’m attractive or something? 

“No, no issue. You look good in it, it’s just very different to what you arrived in Hyrule wearing.”

“I know, like I said then those were my pyjamas. These are my casual clothes.”

Well, his blush has only gotten worse from that, so he is clearly struggling with how my clothes look on me. Dark academia doesn’t exist in Hyrule I know that, but really he’s struggling far more than anyone else has with my fashion sense. 

“Do you think you could help me choose some clothes like that? I’d like to match wit.. I think that style would suit me.”

“If you’d like, we can go shopping for you later. After I get my laptop back and finish off this report I have due.”

Laughing at how he's stumbling over himself to ask me these questions simply isn't an option, no matter how hard it is to hold myself back. He's asking so genuinely and so sweetly and who knows maybe getting some new clothes could help him adjust to this world more easily, I mean it certainly helped me when I was in Hyrule. How different could it be for time?

It didn't take too long to find wild after talking to time, and even less to finish off the work I had to do, now it’s just down to taking time shopping.

“So you want to look like you belong with a shot of espresso in an artisanal coffee shop while writing a research paper?”

“I only know what half of those words mean [name.], even less with how you’re using them.”

“Right, sorry. I’m still getting used to all of the differences in our cultures. Hopefully, you’ll get more used to the terms we use here sooner rather than later. Ready to go out though?”

“I am, it’ll be nice to get some new clothes. Not that I’m complaining about the excuse to wear yours.”

The nearest place that sells things like these isn’t exactly the closest to where I live, making it the perfect opportunity to adjust Time to my world’s transport. Well, more than he’s already seen anyway. Actually, now that I’m thinking about this, what size clothing even is he? Not that it’s an issue but not knowing a vague size is gonna mean he’s going to have to try on a lot of different fits. Then finding the right colours for him is a whole different challenge… And we’re already here… Time to find out the answers to those questions of mine.

“Where would you like to start?”

“A coat exactly like yours perhaps?”

“I don’t see why not. Any colour in mind or just the same style?”

A shrug was NOT what I wanted as an answer, but he does know what he wants which means that I’ve got somewhere to start. Trench Coats are somewhat pricey but with how some of the others are chipping in towards living costs now there’s no issue with spending out occasionally. He seems to be gravitating more towards things that are similar to mine, isn’t that charming? He sees something he likes on me then decides that’s what he wants for himself hopefully, he just stays away from the expensive ones. 

“You ready to try those on then, old man?”

“Just a moment more love, I can’t find quite the right colour yet.”

He just… How red is my face right now? It has to be crimson, doesn’t it? That’s the first time Time’s ever called me something like that naturally it’s when he’s looking at clothes like my own, is he trying to kill me with his charms?

[melanieathene]

Suptober 2023 Day 12 - Swap-Meat

“O-kay,” Bobby drawled. “Run it by me one more time. Cas is Sam. Sam is Dean. Dean is Cas. Have I got that right?”

“No,” Sam said, but the words came out of Castiel's mouth, in Castiel's voice. “Sam is Cas. Cas is Dean. Dean is Sam. ”

“Huh?” Bobby shook his head. “Let's try spelling it out one at a time, boys.”

“I'm Sam,” Sam said, “in Castiel's body.”

“I'm Dean,” Dean said, “in Sam's body.”

“I'm Cas,” Castiel said, “ in Dean's body.”

“I'm confused,” Bobby said. “I'm going to slap name tags on the lot of you.”

“If you think that will help,” Castiel agreed, in Dean's voice – the words didn't sound sarcastic, as they normally would spilling from Dean's lips.

“How long is this going to last, anyway?” Bobby grumbled.

“A day or two. Maybe more, maybe less. Rowena was plenty pissed at us. She wouldn't give a straight answer, just whammo! Swap-meat! And I'm suddenly a giraffe. How do you do it, Sam? It's like walking on stilts.”

“At least you're not stuck wearing a flasher's outfit and shoes that pinch.”

“There's nothing wrong with Cas's trench coat. He'd look naked without it.”

“Well, I'm borrowing some of your clothes, Dean, until we switch back. “How about you, Cas? You doing okay?”

“I'm fine, Sam. Angels are accustomed to adjusting to different vessels. Dean's body is very comfortable, and the bowed legs are quite endearing.”

“Aww,” Dean cooed. “What a nice thing to say.”

Their eyes met and held; unconsciously, they drifted closer together, inevitably drawn into each other's orbit – no matter the bodies they wore.

“Nope, nope, nope!” Sam declared, shoving them apart. “I am not going to stand here and watch myself make out with Dean. You two can just keep it in your pants – your own pants – for the next however long this takes.”

“But, Sam,” Dean whined, turning a pleading look on his brother.

“Those puppy dog eyes won't work on me. I invented them.”

Castiel pouted, the look not new on Dean's face, but quite unsettling coming from the normally implacable angel.

“Fine,” Dean muttered. “No PDAs.”

“No hanky-panky behind closed doors either! You know what – I don't trust you. You and I will bunk together until we're back to ourselves, Dean.”

“Aren't you afraid he will mistake you for me in a half-asleep state and make a move on you?” Castiel wondered.

“Ewww,” Dean and Sam chorused. “Gross!”

“Well it is a possibility,” Cas said. “Dean is surprisingly cuddly, and often wakes up with an erection. If one thing leads to another – as it often does – ”

“I need a drink,” Bobby declared.

“Make that a double,” Sam sighed. “And add a dash of brain bleach while you're at it.”

[aninspiringwriter]

Surprise Dates - Part 4

Summery: After a fun night with Raiden, he makes a suprise plan for a date.

Word count: 805

A/n: I have crawled out of the trenches of depression and finished writing pure fluff for you all

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3 (Smut)

The morning sun comes up, and you start to wake up as well. You slowly sit up in your bed, there is a small warmth within you as you turn to see Raiden still sleeping. Raiden's black hair perfectly presses up against the blueish pillow you have, his breath softly hits your arm. You wake Raiden up, by lightly nudging him awake.

Raiden's groans were louder than you expected them to be so early in the morning, "Oh, what time is it Y/n?" Raiden gets up while saying this in a grumpy tone. "I think it's around 6 am, maybe even 7." You say on response, then you turn your head to see the clock say 6:47. Raiden also looks at your clock, to see it is almost 6:50. He is practically leaning on you, his chin rests itself on your shoulder as his arm wraps around your waist. "Yesterday, I was gonna ask you something, but uh we got… Very distracted." Raiden says, then looks away. He was embarrassed that you and him had some fun last night, you chuckle but then get more and more curious. "Oh? You were gonna ask me something yesterday, what is it?" You ask curiously, your naked body leans against his naked body. Raiden's brown eyes look at you again before bluntly saying what he wants to say.

"A date, a nice little date." Raiden says, your smile brightly lights up the room. "A date? Where do you think we should go?" You ask him, not necessarily rejecting and in fact being very welcoming to the idea of a nice date.

"Maybe at Madame Bo or a nice simple picnic in one of the gardens around here." Raiden moves away from your naked body and is grabbing his clothes off the floor. He gets to his pants before walking towards your closet. Raiden hides his nice toned abs with his shirt. 

"Why are you going inside my clo-" You get interrupted by a green shirt getting thrown at you, a nice light green shirt you even forgot you had. Along with a nice pair of flowing leggings that has blue spots near the waist and the ends of the leggings. "Oh… You have good clothing taste Raiden," you start to compliment him before saying more, "but can I get some underwear as well, my love?" You ask nicely, and Raiden compiles before looking confused. "Oh, right bottom drawer." You tell him bluntly where they are. Raiden finds them easily and gives you one of your laced ones. "How about a picnic at a garden near here, you pick the garden and I will get the stuff for it." Raiden says as he watches you with heart eyes as you get dressed. After you get fully dressed you think about the different gardens near here, then knows the right one. "Isn't there a garden near the bridge where the Sun Do festival is held?" You suggest as you go to Raiden, you start to hold his hand. Raiden's face shows he is in deep thought before nodding his head, a small beautiful smile runs through his face. "Perfect! I've always liked that garden anyways." You say, kissing his cheek. Raiden looks at you with those heart eyes of him that looks like a siren has him in a chokehold. "How about at noon?" Raiden asks you, playing with your hair. You nod yes, as you and him go to your door, you kiss his cheek and wave to him as he leaves.

Later, you put on a greenish-blue jacket and grab a blanket, a blanket with pink and orange flowers on it. You check the time and the time is 11:42,  you start to panic, quickly putting on some socks and shoes and run out the door.  It's 12:08 and you see Raiden, he was wearing a light purple robe and he looked nervous. "Sorry for being so late Raiden, I was procrastinating on what jacket to wear and what blanket to bring." You explain, Raiden smiles as he carries a basket filled with what smells like sweets and fruit, a bottle of what seems to be wine sticking out of the basket. You put down the blanket and Raiden puts down the basket and looks at you, and the way the noon sun glistens on your skin makes Raiden smile. "What did you bring?" You ask, as Raiden pulls out 2 plastic clear wine cups and the wine. "I stopped by our favorite dessert places and the local market for some sweets and fruit." Raiden says, pouring you and him the wine. Raiden grabs some strawberries and a small cherry cheesecake out of the basket. The date was sweet, like the food, and the way Raiden treated you like royalty made it sweeter.

[bonesandpoemsandflowers]

hey!!!!! i found this account recently and your info dumps and rants about poto are so based!!!! (coming from a high school student who loves gothic literature too).

what do you think about phantom of the opera attempting to defy tropes and cliches of the romantic era? considering that when gaston leroux wrote it when the era was coming to an end i’d like to think he said fuck it. and crafted poto to be a mockery of those romantic stereotypes ESPECIALLY with christine’s complexity and many facets …. what do you think? could be a really interesting thing to explore!! i am getting wayyy too deep

Lord, I'm not sure if I should be pleased or concerned that a high school student is describing my opinions as based at my age, but thanks. I had a high school PotO phase (naturally) and I've often reflected on how annoyed I would be if I had to face the current Discourse(tm) at that age. And also imo (naturally) there is no "too deep."

I do think that there's a lot to the idea that PotO is very much of its time. That is--it's so definitely post Romantic.

I wrote this in two separate sessions so I probably repeat myself, but:

have an essay, anon!

I don't think it's a mockery of the tropes as much as it is putting a bunch of the tropes in a blender. At the end of an era you have all these very familiar tropes to work with, so you can get weird about it. The audience already basically knows what to expect, so they're on familiar ground. Then you can fuck with them a little to make it your own.

It's like anything else going through phases: you get some critically claimed zombie shit (Romero's work or the walking dead first season) and then as time goes on people iterate and stunt on the genre so you get increasingly weird premises (what if zombies but mushrooms?) (what if zombie but stalker?) of varying degrees of seriousness and quality.

I'm not familiar enough with Gaston Leroux's other work, but I've read at least two scholarly pieces claiming that Erik is not just a mash up of established characters, but of mash up of Gaston's Leroux's own characters from other novels, specifically. So that's why some of his skillsets make no sense paired together: it's just a bunch of guys in there, wearing a trench coat full evening dress. And as a writer, I totally get this urge. "This guy was cool in this book, why not put him in this other book? Also he has an entirely new profession now. He went to trade school in the meantime or some shit."

Christine, though! This is trickier for me and shows my hand. I don't think I can as confidentially and easily toss off opinions about female characters in the Romantic and post Romantic eras. I'm going to reason through this as we go along. I have no idea what my conclusion is going to be because I have to check some dates first. I will give you my personal final answer for why Christine is as she is at the end, regardless.

So on one hand you have Frankenstein's Elizabeth in 1818, who, as far as I know, nobody is writing think pieces about. She's there, she's pretty and soft and good. She inspires Victor to think nice boy thoughts. Unless you know that first draft Victor was more explicitly modeled on Percy Shelley, you'd never know that first draft Elizabeth was based on Mary Shelley, because Elizabeth is almost a non-entity, while Mary Shelley was cool as fuck. Elizabeth is mostly there to be fridged--which I'm not necessarily against, because death and the maiden and blah blah blah and pretty dead girls is a horror genre motif specifically because people find it so tragic and moving. But also, like. Nobody's out here going, wow! Elizabeth! What a compelling female character! and if I did hear anybody say that, I would press x to doubt. Frankenstein is one of my favorite works of literature and I couldn't even remember Elizabeth's name for a solid three minutes.

But then, in 1847, you have Jane Eyre. And I don't know about you, anon, but I love Jane Eyre, and I love Jane. I was absolutely sitting there in AP Lit going "omg I'm such a Jane" and lusting over middle aged men. I think it's funny and great that it's taught in schools for that reason--Jane is basically your age when you read it! She's so relatable! She's whip smart and she's proud and she's struggling! What teenage girl isn't full of anguish and pride and internal screaming! People do write think pieces about Jane, as they should. And then, in 1897, you have Dracula. Which means you have Mina. And is anyone on earth arguing that Mina ISN'T great? She is also pure and good and blah blah--all the examples on this list are good girls and we'll get to that in a second--but she is, like Jane, very smart. She's using the cutting edge technology of her time! She's brave and clever and willing to fight against fucking Dracula. Mina rules. When I first read your ask, my first instinct here was to be dismissive of the idea that Christine is the result of rebellion against her era, because I specifically thought: well she's basically a Mina, isn't she? So not innovative at all. BUT. I think my first instinct was wrong, actually. Or at least: taking a lot for granted. Looking at the dates for the gothic classics I rattled off the top of my head--there's a progression there, isn't there? They're all Good Girls but the good girl gets smarter and more competent as time goes on. And Mina is cool but still part of the ensemble. Christine often gets co-billing with Erik or she's outright considered the main character. She gets a much bigger piece of the story pie.

And I think Christine is more emotionally nuanced than anyone else on this list. She's deftly navigating class differences (calling Raoul on his shit) (Mina never does that I recall--Jane does but that is central to her circumstances) and she's well aware of Erik's horror (you know, his everything) but book Christine is more emotionally savvy than most modern day readers in that she understands that Erik is to a great degree a product of his environment. I hate that people these days view Erik as a bad boyfriend metaphor. He's not. He is, as the book tells us over and over, a monster. And also…very human. And the way those things collide and what that means is the point of the book, and maybe the ending is too tidy but that the book has a happy ending is imo almost solely Christine's doing. Sure, the dagora and Raoul are doing stuff. But they might as well be mice in a fairy tale giving the dispossessed princess (and main character) advice on how to sort wheat in the moonlight or whatever. The person directly confronting the monster is Christine. And the person that grants him grace and thereby humanizes him…is Christine. Only Christine has this alchemical power in the novel. The dagora's been humanizing Erik for DECADES of in story time and apparently this hasn't accomplished shit. Furthermore, Christine's power here isn't something that Erik grants her because she doesn't humanize him with the Power of Music or whatever. It's her parsing things out and making choices. Christine's empathy is not a gift that Erik gives her; she has it from the start.

But it's a little tricky, right. It's too tidy. I'm letting it be tidy for now but as you know--I assume if you've been floating through my poorly tagged rants--I view PotO pretty exclusively through a monsterfucking lens and Christine might be the hero, but we, the audience, are supposed to identify with Erik and all that is monstrous in ourselves.

(have a tag mini essay about it here.)

but whatever! that's not the question!

The question being, as I understand it: is Christine's characterization in particular a reaction against the artistic context of Leroux's time?

and…yes and no?

Like if we look through our cherry-picked examples, there is a CLEAR progression in female character work. But these are stand outs and not necessarily representative. They are classics for a reason. And I suspect we can't forget genre here. Enduring gothic horror is pretty much always transgressive in some way. So a progression that we can track in THIS genre doesn't necessarily mean society or art on the whole was on the same track, let alone at the same pace. I would defer to the kind of weirdo that has more expertise than me here--the kind of person who deliberately reads forgotten or unclaimed period literature. Someone who really gets the artistic context of the time, not just the classics.

How much of that is Gaston Leroux on purpose, though, right? That’s more of what you mean, I think, and that’s what I should be answering. If I rephrase it to: do I think Christine is written that way on purpose? ABSOLUTELY, yes.

HOWEVER

I have a much simpler reason I think Gaston Leroux wrote a great female protag in 1909. And that is: Gaston Leroux fucks. As in, very literally went through a messy lady's man, spend his inheritance in brothels phase.

You might think I mean that in a bad way, but no. The right kind of personality doing this is someone who meets to and talks to a bunch of women. And if it's a man who happens to view women as people--and also views sex workers as human--a dude can come out of this phase really well rounded. Or: not every guy who goes to the strip club is a loser or a misogynist.

You are too young to remember this, anon, but [crone voice] time was, people thought Joss Whedon was a feminist writer. I got myself kicked out of TWO different feminist clubs in undergrad because everybody loved Buffy the Vampire Slayer and I was an asshole who said "Buffy the Vampire Slayer is shit." Or rather, it's fine, it's fun, but I don't view it as a feminist work and to me, Whedon was so obviously always a creep and none of his female characters ever resonated. (in all fairness to both undergrad clubs: I was an asshole. And I was very young, and I was frustrated by not having the language for what I meant yet. But my issues with Whedon could fill many other posts.)

There is a type of male writer that I describe as: this man has never talked to a woman in his goddamn life.

And that's not literally true; it's impossible for it to be literally true.

But I think it is basically true in that you have men who never talk to women unless they're trying to fuck them and even then only ever talk to them as vending machines they expect to spit out a fuck token if they hit the right word count. And it shows in their work! it shows! people are always surprised when a Louis CK type ends up with sexual misconduct accusations. people seem to think only Chads are predators. no! no no no no. The Neil Gaiman shit coming out recently, do you know who was surprised? NOT ME.

Which isn't to say you can't trust nerds ever. Nor am I saying that every man who blows his hereditament on hookers and blow is gonna be the kind of guy who actually has conversations with women.

What am I saying here? I am saying that I think Gaston Leroux was probably a pretty cool dude. He wrote Erik incredibly sexy despite literally everything and he wrote Christine brave and resourceful and willing to talk back to her pretty boy nobility love interest. That dude hung out with women. I am SURE of it. I do not think anyone could write a character as enduring as Erik, as bizarrely romantically and sexually appealing as Erik, without understanding what (some) women want, what (some) women like.

but here's something you didn't ask about--I called all these female characters good girls, right? And interestingly, arguably, both Mina and Christine have bad girl counterparts. Or Lucy isn't exactly a bad girl--until she's a vampire--but her three proposals a day are presented in contrast to Mina's already settled engagement. And Christine's story opens with Sorelli!

(I fucking love Sorelli)

Sorelli, who is Phillipe's mistress and carries a knife everywhere! GOD I LOVE HER. where was I.

anyway, good girls.

The ingénue.

I read The Phantom of the Opera for the first time when I was nine years old. I had to use my mom's paperback merriam webster dictionary to look up the word ingénue. I don't remember what I read but I remember very distinctly thinking: ah. not me, then.

which is an INSANE thought to have as a 9 year old!

but 9 year old me was right. by that point my family had lived in not one but several war zones and we had specifically been on a cartel hit list. I had seen people jump off a suicide bridge by our apartment.

The adults in my life, possibly because they were stressed out from living in a war zone, were all deeply committed to fucked up behaviors so that young me lived in a particularly gory telenovela. I knew what bombs sounded like and what gunshots sounded like and what bodies in the street looked like.

I had a shit and deeply weird childhood for reasons beyond all that, too, but the point is that I'm always arguing about this story with people from a certain kind of comfortable background that I just don't have. Didn't have, even at the time. I do not remember childhood as an idyllic time, as Bill Watterson once said.

so if you read PotO and you're not Christine

and you're not Raoul, because Raoul is a good girl except he's a boy and also rich and actual nobility, so therefore even less relatable

then who are you?

if you're weird and haunted and already feel different and other than your peers (and your peers can tell that there is, in fact, something wrong with you) (even if it's not your fault) and you read this book, who are you?

You're Erik. as stupid as that might sound. Even if you are, say, cute and small and nine years old.

and then, once I was older, once I re-read it and watched the 2005 movie and generally rediscovered the story post puberty, then I was like: oh my god he's HOT he's been hot this WHOLE TIME.

my initial reaction, even as a child, was sympathy and empathy and it is fuckin wild to me, my dude, that people keep reading this story in this day and age and they instantly align themselves against Erik because Erik is so immediately other. He immediately becomes a cipher for things they find monstrous. I genuinely feel there is some Jungian shadow shit happening here but it also makes me feel terribly cynical and un-ingénue all over again that people think Erik is about male entitlement or toxic relationships. It's always ERIK: SYMBOL OF BAD BOYFRIEND. and like, honestly? honestly? drives me fucking insane for reasons beyond the obvious, too. HOW COMFORTABLE ARE YOU IF YOUR ONLY CONTEXT FOR MONSTER IS TOXIC ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP?

not that, say, DV won't fucking kill you. but that's not even what most of the anti Erik crowd means. my point is merely that there are many more types of trauma, and many more types of monsters.

[also yeah planning to blow up an opera house is straight up evil, though. no excuses for mass murder events.]

But back to Erik—not that you even asked about Erik—I truly believe that there is a huge chunk of the audience with the media literacy of tin can of beans. I was haunting the PotO subreddit for a while and the takes are rancid. I really think a certain kind of reader—usually a woman—reads that Erik is ugly and Raoul is pretty and rich and noble, and that is somehow all they get from the work.

And that Erik—who is ugly—might feel normal human drives like lust or the desire to be loved is disgusting to these people. And they act like it. "This is a story about male entitlement!" No. It’s a story about human yearning. That some people react to yearning from an imperfect source with such visceral disgust is, you know, the entire point of the fucking book.

I preach to the choir, of course. It is on purpose. I am tired of arguing, of the expectation of being pious and apologetic before enjoying the work.

I logged out of reddit mostly to stop going to r/Box5. “And look how much healthier and hotter you’ve gotten in the past few months!” a friend said to me recently, which is a) kind of cringe and pathetic but also b) objectively true.

have you experienced love never dies yet so we can talk about how it's bad? no? SAVE YOURSELF, CHILD. RUN! RUN AWAY NOW BEFORE IT CATCHES YOU.

(LND is bad but compelling all the same. it's a disease.)

anyway, hope some of that is enlightening, thank you for stopping by and saying hi, and enjoy your future phantom adventures.

[velvetsands]

2024: milestone after milestone

living with my partner after two years long distance was such a nice reward, and confirmed that everything was right

realised my dream of going to the australian open

and going to attica(!!) and having a kangaroo meat pie

before coming back to the table and getting engaged(!!!!!!)

unfortunately we wanted to elope but family had other ideas

leading us to plan our wedding in just three weeks

it was such a great day but yeah, not what a little girl dreams of

anyway!

turned 30 on the 2/2 - glamped/biked around riesling country in adelaide which was goooorgeous

i was conferred my phd on the 22/2 which was cool

recieved dean's commendation for outstanding theses

submitted our manuscript for publication after so much tweaking

married on the 3/3

so yeah it was pretty full-on time tbh

we packed up our entire home, facebook marketplace was our best friend

my husband flew to saudi two weeks later, sending us back into the trenches of long-distance with a new challenge of time zones

i started my long goodbye to alcohol on a trip with friends to kangaroo island - lots of wine, laughter, and swimming with dolphins!

packed up my suitcase, ready to live out of it for the next three months and moved back into my childhood room in brisbane

spent easter with my sister, our grandparents and their siblings which was so lovely

went to san diego for a conference and for some reason, we were invited to the first class bar area on the plane (i can only assume an attendant heard my colleague and i talking about our cancer research which was very unexpected and nice)

flew to sydney for two weeks to complete requested experiments from reviewers and said goodbyes to all my friends

and finally received my saudi visa after much faffing around

my first business class experience to saudi was the qatar qsuite and it was heaven 40k feet above earth

all our stuff from adelaide arrived a few days after me, i set up the entire house

the compound is amazing, so much green space and although it hit 46C in summer, the lack of humidity makes it bearable

lack of alcohol was hard at first but then you just don't seem to think about it? there are tough days where you wish you had a whiskey sure but you get through it

worked on the paper revisions back and forth for months on end

we went to paris and bordeaux just before the olympics and stayed in chateaus and drank beautiful wine and did lots of fine dining

the saudi way of life is very much "inshallah", it's not very conducive to a western way of working which has been a steep learning curve

being here finally gave me the TIME to plan, order and cook whatever my heart desired instead of feeling like a total chore and hindrance during my phd

we went to turkey and bought rugs, drank, explored the landmarks, and went back to my hammam that i dreamt about re-visiting since 2018

saudi racing is fun but as no drinking or gambling, you just sort of sit around and gasbag with friends the entire time hahaha

the women like to engage with me and ask lots of question and the kids like to show off their english and be super cheeky with me!

in general, saudi's are the kindest people and feel the need to impress! same with the pakistani and indian expats!

there is such a sense of non-urgency yet things happen at the last minute - it's truly a wonder

i don't dress much differently to australia which made me realise i am quite modest (and that's fine). i try not to wear an abaya to show expat women that you can still be #stylish

i recieved lots of compliments from saudi women on my outfits which makes me feel FANTASTIC

i did however have to buy new racewear for here ofc which is fine

we went back to paris for racing of the arc at longchamp and explored a bit more, caught up with friends, lots of good food and museums, climbed the eiffel tower etc.

started doing mini triathlons are managed to get a sub-1hr 400m swim/8km bike/2.5km run which i was stoked about

made friends with someone at the australian embassy which was been wonderful - we went to a gala dinner onsite and i think that's a once in a lifetime experience

flew back to australia for the holidays which was again, another insane trip of three weeks in a suitcase

brisbane for a few days, to adelaide for racing (we were guests of honor which was hilarious) and to catchup with our friends and chicken schnitzels; back to brisbane and then to sydney

for my graduation gift, we booked a hotel under the sydney harbour bridge which was like a staycation in our own city. that was such a treasured part of my year

the uni dress people gave me a faulty phd bonnet which was too late to be fixed which resulting in a botched graduation photo with VC :( i got it replaced it after the ceremony but i still haven't recovered from the embarassment and anger!!!!!!

we flew out that night to hong kong for the international racing and catch ups! saw romantic warrior win up close <3

and then flew home just in time for christmas (we had a moo deng angel for our fiddle leaf) and spent christmas at the ritz carlton in riyadh which was unparallelled luxury

oh the manuscript was finally published on the 12/12 in nature communications (v prestigious, v proud) but bc of the embargo, i missed out on doing all public inteviews and tv appearances as i was no longer in australia :---(((((( honestly, the whole process sucked and really jaded me as a scientist - i know it's publish or perish but they just make it so demanding and hard

also they charged us 10k USD to publish which is an actual joke as they don't do any print versions, we could used that to perform more experiments

oh the patent was finalised too so now i can say i have officially found a potential cure for cancer

in bed at 10:30pm on new years because honestly, i think we celebrated every week of this year in a different shape or form

2025

just not sure hey!

i can't seem to get a job here try as i might

going to sweden to mid-jan to ski (read: apres bc i don't ski lol) with friends from australia and america! i am scared of the cold but we shall see

saudi cup is a big time here as the richest horse race in the world

we may be moving compounds which is slightly annoying

our cancer therapy will move into clinical trials in the first half of the year so i am really hoping that we can do some good in the world and make a difference to some families

we have tickets to the imola and monaco f1 gps!!! hoping to do lake como between the racing and we have a yacht for monaco!!!!!!

we may be moving to *** mid-year but stay tuned/fingers crossed

but other than that, inshallah it will be a good year!

[the-fiction-witch]

We're Family P2

Media The Queens Gambit

Character Benny Watts

Couple Benny X reader

Rating CUTE

I sat sipping my drink from its straw, the cup resting on my bump and the straw between my lips as I sipped the apple juice, my feet up on the coffee table. I heard the door open so I turned and saw Marybelle arrive home from school,

"Hi Honey," I smiled as she came through,

"Hi Mom," she said as she sat on the sofa too, "Where's Dad?"

"Groceries."

"ahh, how did your appointment go?"

"good, very good. Baby is coming along cosy and happy,"

"Good," she nodded, "What was all the swearing about last night?" She asked, "Or... do I not wanna know?"

"Why wouldn't you wanna know?" I giggled,

"...I don't know why he's swearing in the middle of the night in your bedroom."

I laughed, "Marybelle. Benny was putting the bedside crib together."

"ahh..." she nodded,

"Can I know why your friend Sam was swearing when he visited last week?"

"...no,"

"Alright," I chuckled,

I heard the door open and I looked over as Benny set the groceries on the kitchen table, "Hello my beautiful girls," he smiled as he came and leant over the sofa, "Hi honey," He smiled kissing Marybelle's cheek, "Hi Sweetie," he smiled kissing my cheek, "Hi baby girl," He cooed as he kissed my baby bump, "how are my lovely ladies?"

"Baby's kicking away," I smiled,

"Awww kicky little baby," he cooed as he came and kissed my bump resting his head there as he stroked, "such excited little thing, excited to come out for cuddles," he cooed, "How is mommy?" He cooed,

"Okay, I think," I laughed,

"Good," He smiled, "How was your day Marybelle?"

"Fine, Lisa threw a sandwich at Jacob Lintworth's head."

"Ohh..." I laughed,

"Perticular reason? or... did he just need gluten in his hair?" Benny laughed,

"He called her a gothy Bitch,"

"Ahh..." I nodded, "Makes sense,"

"I mean... Lisa... Kinda is..." Benny began,

"You wear a leather trench coat," she snapped,

"...Touche," he nodded,

I smiled as I stood in the kitchen cooking up some nice yummy cravings, frying some battered strawberries, Benny had his arms wrapped around me his hands on my stomach, his chin on my shoulder as we cuddled.

Marybelle sat doing homework at the kitchen table rolling her eyes a little at us, "You guys are mushy,"

"It is love," I smiled, "I love you Darling," I cooed,

"I love you too Sweetie," He cooed giving my lips a soft kiss,

"Adorable. And Mushy." she sighed,

"We love you too Marybelle," I smiled,

"Gross," she sighed taking her books and heading to her room,

"Teenagers," I sighed,

"Were you like this as a teenager?"

"I was a teen mother, of course Not. I was busy trying to afford baby toys and get some kind of a sleep schedule," I explained, "and you know dealing with a perverted Narasassist."

"Well you have me to help with this baby, I promise Y/n. I am going to take good care of you and our sweet baby," he smiled, "and Marybelle but... you know she's a teenager she doesn't much need my help. or want my help." He laughed, "Which is fair I also wouldn't want my help,"

"I would want your help you're a very smart man, Benny,"

"Course I am. I'm a genius."

"Yes, yes my sweet chess Genius,"

"Humm... More, I'm a genius cause I managed to get the most beautiful woman in the world to marry me and let me get her pregnant,"

"Awww Benny... Don't say stuff like that you'll make me cry!"

"Sorry, I don't mean to make my baby mama cry." he chuckled,

"Everything makes me cry Benny," I smiled as I served up my strawberries,

"Good point," he chuckled, "alright let me try the pregnancy cravings," He sighed,

So I happily handed him one as I had my own,

"...well... it... edible... I guess..." he said,

"I like it,"

"if your happy sweetie," He said, "Kinda... reminds me of battered prawns in the way it's like crunchy batter and then a sweet mushy inside,"

"Yeah! That was the aim,"

"if you wanted battered prawns why did you not make battered prawns?"

"Prawns are shellfish,"

"ahhh... now I get it," He nodded,

"They are nice though," I smiled,

"They're fine..." he shrugged,

"Better than the milk sausages?"

"ughh- please... Y/n... sweetie... don't remind me." He says just the memory of it makes him gag,

"Sorry Benny," I giggled,

"It's fine just... Ughh... nope the smell is in my brain I'm gonna hurl," he says bolting to the bathroom,

"Sorry, Benny darling!" I yelled,

I yawned as I sat on my yoga ball slightly bouncing myself as Benny played some chess,

"You wanna play sweetie?" he asked,

"no thank you, baby brain."

"is it that bad?"

"I tried to brush my teeth with a cheese string this morning,"

"ahh... fair enough." he chuckled, "You are really struggling with baby brain,"

"Maybe the baby is too smart, taking all my brain."

"Maybe, that's what happens when you have a chess prodigy baby,"

"A chess prodigy baby?"

"They are gonna be a chess prodigy, I mean I was as soon as I waltzed out of the womb."

I laughed, "Waltzed? no baby waltz's out the womb, Benny,"

"True," He chuckled, "But still our baby will be chess prodigy I'm sure of it,"

"We can hope," I smiled, "Ohhh!" I clutched my stomach,

"Oh?! Oh! is something happening!"

"....no." I sighed,

"Ohh thank god," he sighed, "Where's Marybelle anyway? Shouldn't she be home by now?"

"Therapy it's Thursday,"

"ohh yeah," He nodded,

I smiled as I sat at the table doing some crafting and scrapbooking in my little book planning and marking when I'd need to do the other things, Benny sat across from me with his recent chess magazine he got in the post this morning,

"Hummm..." He muttered,

"Hum?" I asked,

"They have Ohio on as the top prediction for this year's US championship."

"Ohh... wasn't Ohio like three years back?"

"Four but yeah, why would they go back to Ohio so soon?"

"didn't you say it was a uni?"

"Yeah some backwater University, playing on cheap plastic boards with cheap plastic pieces."

"Ohh... Maybe that's why? cheaper."

"True," He sighed, "But why not Vegas again then? Vegas hotels love it cause everyone has to pay for rooms to stay there. And you might tag team with your chess friends but you do not share bedrooms." he explained, "Plus everyone goes down and has a drink in the evening its good money for them."

"Maybe they don't want chess people cause most of them don't gamble?"

"Ehhh maybe," he shrugged,

"Ohhh..." I gulped,

"Oh? Oh! what Oh?" He asks setting his magazine down,

"Ooooohhhh nooo..." I said clutching my belly,

"Baby?!"

"BABY!" I nodded,

"Ohh no! Ohhhhhhh nooooo!" He gulped, "Okay! Okay! We need uhhh... Ooooh we need! Stuff! we need bags! we need your baby bag! we... we haven't packed it yet!"

"Just throw a nightie, a baby blanket, some bottles and a sleep mask in the black bag,"

"Okay! I can do that!" He bolted up to gather things,

"BENNY MOVE!" I screamed,

"Okay! okay! I'm moving!" he yelled,

"Yes I'm surprised you were able to be so calm From the look of it you've been in active labour for at least twelve hours" the doctor said as he came closer,

"Yeah… not my first time I kinda just ignored it?" I answered

“Ignored it!” Benny complained, “Why didn’t you say!”

“If I told you every time I was in pain during this pregnancy Benny you’d have told me to shut up a million times!”

"But that does mean baby will be along shortly. But not a lot of time for-” the doctor explained,

"No no, I know what you're gonna say, no. It's not going to happen. This happened last time, this happened with Marybelle I am not doing it again! I need my drugs!"

"I'm afraid that's just not possible Mrs watts not this late," he says

"Please please I'm begging you I need drugs there is no way I can do this without drugs. There is going to be a whole Human making its way out of me, PLEASE"

"Sorry, Mrs. Watts." He says before he got on with business with the nurses I just laid back on the bed.

"Ahhhhhhh!" I screamed as this pain rocketed through me and the room sprung into action a nurse beside me giving me a pace to breathe at, the doctor between my legs and nurses beside him by now the waves had subsided and it was now just this constant pain growing and growing each push of my almost numb muscles made the pain grow more and more I could hear them talking telling me things but I was so overwhelmed by pain all I heard was breath and push and that's all I did just keep breathing and pushing keep breathing and pushing I'd never felt pain so intense in my life that my mind basically shut itself down tears streaming down my face my body numb but in agony "aaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh!'

"Good good you're doing fine, another big push for me"

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" I screamed

"Very good"

“Ohh my god this is terrifying…” Benny sighed as he held my hand,

“Ohhh It's bad for you!” I yelled,

“Big push for me," the doctor told me,

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!” I screamed, "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"

"you doing okay sweetie?" Benny smiled kissing my head

"Do I look okay!"

"Sorry good point…” he sighed, "You must be... in misery"

"You think!"

"Well I'm happy to be here to hold your hand, sweetie," He smiled holding my hand sweetly and kissing it but I grabbed his shirt

"You really think I brought you here to be all cute and loving? You think I brought you here to hold my hand and kiss my head like some shit rom-com movie Benny! NO! If I have to sit here and push a goddamn human out of me without even a fucking ibuprofen as it rips its way out of me, You are gonna fucking be here! and you are going to fucking watch the absolute shit show that is the birth of a child! You dare look away I swear to god I will make you feel this pain Benny I swear it!"

"And push" the doctor demanded so I did what I could even if my body basically began to work on its own at a point where my body knew it had to get this out whether I liked it or not pure animalistic evolutionary madness fueled my body as it worked to get this thing out! And I screamed the blood-curdling sound bouncing off the hospital walls "You did this to me! You fucking bastard Benny! After Marybelle, I never wanted to do this again! Ahhhhhhhhhh!" I screamed

"Oh my god!” Benny gulped,

"Okay big push," The doctor says and I grab Benny's hand and scream "Perfect perfect keep that going," he says and I basically left my body from the stinging burning pain my vision blurring all I saw was the nurses working the doctor barking orders and benny holding my hand even if I did see his face go white I swear I blacked out and merely woke up to the nurses rubbing my legs and smiling

"You did great, that's amazing, baby's here," The nurse told me

"Baby's here?" I asked

"Baby's here,” the nurse smiled as she handed me the wrapped-up little body of our little baby girl, she had a patch of little Y/H/C hair and little brown eyes,

"awww... she's beautiful," I cooed,

"she is, she is just as beautiful as her mother." he smiled giving my cheek a kiss and her little head, "Our perfect little girl,"

"Our beautiful baby girl," I smiled as we cuddled her and gave her all the kisses, "what should we name her?"

"I do have an idea,"

"Ohh?"

"Cassia."

"Cassia?" I smiled, "I like it, little Cassia Watts."

"Little baby Cassia. It's perfect," he smiled,

I sat slowly giving Cassia her bottle as I sat on the sofa, The door opened and suddenly slammed shut.

"What the fuck!" Marybelle yelled,

"Whoa! Whoa, what's the matter, honey?" Benny tried to calm her given he was already in the kitchen,

"I was left at the school gate for THREE HOURS!" She yelled, "In the rain!"

"Ohh my god-" I gasped, as I remembered,

"Marybelle we-" he began,

"And after I walked home the door was locked! I had to stay all night at Lisa's!" she yelled, "and then I came back this morning still locked! what the fuck happened! I was down here an hour banging on the door before school!"

"Marybelle, Honey we are so so sorry," I told her,

"We are so sorry Honey Please forgive us." Benny told her pulling her into a hug as she was more upset than angry, "We're so sorry, I was going to call school once we got to the hospital, I just lost track of time."

"Hosptial!" she asked,

"Marybelle, come meet your baby sister," I smiled,

"I missed her being born!" She complained as she came to the sofa,

"We're so sorry Marybelle," Benny said as he came over too,

"It's okay, lots going on," she nodded, "I can deal with being forgotten one time. given she was being born I feel like that's fair..." She nodded, "Can I hold her?"

"Of course, she's just finished her bottle, you can hold her so long as you give her some burping pats." I smiled handing her over, "Gentle, gently... there you go, Marybelle,"

"Awww... Hi... Hi lil sis. She's cute."

"She is isn't she," Benny smiled,

"Her Name?"

"Cassia," I smiled,

"Cassia? I guess Dad named her right?"

"Yes, how could you tell?"

"We read the poem in class,"

"I think it suits her." Benny smiled,

"It does," she nodded,

"I'm sure you two will get along amazingly, you'll be an amazing big sister, Marybelle," I told her,

"I hope I can be," she nodded,

I smiled as I watched Benny putting Cassia to sleep as I did some scrapbooking adding her recent footprint to her book.

"what's all that?" Marybelle asked as she finished her homework,

"Cassia's baby book, it has all her little things in so we can look back and see how she grew." I smiled showing her Cassia's book full of prints, trinkers, photos and such.

"Awww that's sweet," she smiled, "Where's my baby book?"

"Ohh... you- uhh I didn't make one for you," I told her, "Of course you're in other photo albums and such but..."

"Why don't I have a baby book?"

"Well... I was only a little younger than you when I had you, I didn't really have the money to buy a book for you, or the time to do it all and god knows your father wasn't going to help me do stuff like that." I explained,

"Oh..."

"I do regret it, I wish I had made one for you Marybelle. Then we could look back and see how you grew. Compare it with Cassia. I wish I had made one up for you,"

"It's okay..." she nodded,

I sighed as I tried to get Cassia to go to sleep in her little baby basket in the living room, trying to keep her quiet as Benny had been up all night with her so I let him go to bed upstairs for a few hours,

"I wasn't picked up again!" Marybelle yelled as she came in,

"Maybelle!" I told her, "Please... quiet."

"I was forgotten after my therapy again!" she complained hushed,

"I am so so sorry Marybelle,"

"Yeah yeah, you're always sorry... sorry I am not Cassia then my every need would be taken care of!"

"Marybelle, Cassia is an infant! we have to do everything for her! everything! She can't walk! She can't eat! She can't even wipe her own butt!" I complained, "I'm sorry honey. it's just... babies are very hard to juggle," I explained,

"Dad could have come get me."

"He's asleep. and I would really not like to wake him. He's been up all night with Cassia he got no sleep, Yes... I should have woken him to come get you Marybelle but I am very very tired and yes... I forgot. I am sorry."

"You're really struggling aren't you?"

"Babies... are hard honey," I told her,

"... If... If we cancelled my therapy? Could you afford a Nanny? or daycare for Cassia?"

"You don't have to do that Marybelle."

"I know... but I wanna help,"

"Thank you, that's very sweet and very appreciated." I smiled kissing her on the head, "But it's okay, me and Benny can manage and you need your appointments,"

"Okay, and I'll make walking home part of my day. to take it off your plate."

"Thank you, Marybelle,"

"Did you want me to take her? so you can get some rest with Dad?"

"No no you get on with your homework," I told her,

"What did I miss?" Benny asks as he comes down the stairs,

"Your turn," I told him, handing him Cassia, "I'm going to bed."

"Okay, sweetie..." he yawned, "what did I miss?"

"Crying and screaming," I told him

"The usual day. Got it." he nodded, "Ohh Hi Marybelle..."

"Hi Dad," she sighed, "You wanna hand?"

"no no I got the babygirl," He said,

I sighed as I sat down putting Cassia down for a nap sitting with Benny laying my head in his lap,

"uhhh babies are exhausting..."

"Yeah. Imagine marybelle back when I had no help."

"How are you even alive?"

"To be fair... Marybelle didn't cry insistently like Cassia."

"...Y/n Sweetie?"

"Yes, Benny darling?" I yawned,

"...where is marybelle?"

"At school.... right?"

"It's six pm."

"Therapy?"

"Sunday."

"In her room?"

"Her room door was open when I put Cassia down..."

"Oh god-"

"Oh my god where is Marybelle!" I yelled as I got up bolted to the phone and called Lisa's mother,

"Hello?"

"Hi, Carol! is uhhh is Marybelle with Lisa!"

"Yes..."

"Ohh thank god!" I sighed, "She's with Lisa." I told Benny,

"Ohh thank fuck!"

"Can we have a word?"

"Course," she said and minutes later,

"Hi."

"Hi! Marybelle why didn't you say you were going to Lisa's!" I asked,

"I've been here since Friday night."

"WHa- YOU WHAT!"

"Yeah, thanks for noticing!"

"Marybelle we are so sorry we-"

"Didn't even notice! yeah, I gathered!"

"Marybelle please we-"

"It's fine you're dealing with your perfect little girl so I figured I'd just leave. and since it took you till Sunday night to even notice I guess you didn't miss me that much."

"We are so so sorry honey we have had so much going on with your sister-"

"It's fine. I'll stay here. You can move Cassia into my room."

"Marybelle No! please just come home and we can talk."

"Fine..." she sighed hanging up the phone,

"We are bad parents."

"I know..." Benny sighed, "I'm gonna let you lead this one... I don't think

Luckily it wasn't long till a very angry Marybelle was home,

"Marybelle please, we are so so sorry honey, everything has just been insane with Cassia, we never meant to forget about you, please forgive us and we'll do whatever you like next weekend."

"...I know this baby is hard. I get it. but... you fill her baby book once a week. take hundreds of pictures of her. every day you talk about her. you spent all your time with her. and around her. I just... I feel like... I'm an extra piece... like Your a mum, a dad and your little girl and I'm just... here."

"Marybelle you are not just here. you're our girl."

"Not your perfect little baby girl."

"No. you're not our perfect little baby girl. you're our perfect big girl growing up, and we still want to be with you, still want to see you, still want to be in every moment of your life. You are always gonna be our first girl. Our perfect girl. I know it must feel a bit like we are shutting you out. but I promise you we are a family all four of us. Just right now... Cassia needs us more than you do. and it's not that we don't want to be in your life... it's that... you're a big girl, you're growing up, and that is amazing! we want to be as much a part of it as we wanna be in Cassia's but... she needs us to be hands-on. Becuase she's a baby Marybelle. We have to be hands-on with her we don't have a choice." I told her, "It doesn't mean we don't want you here or don't want to be involved."

"You mean that?"

"Of course we do marybelle, Hey? come on honey we'll get a takeaway for tea and next weekend we promise whatever you wanna do and we'll do it as a family," Benny told her,

"Thank you," she nodded, "I'm sorry... I guess I could be a little more understanding given the new baby,"

"It's okay, we should have been more considerate about you. do you forgive us?" I asked,

"I forgive you," she nodded hugging me, I happily wrapped my arms around her and Benny wrapped his arms around us both,

"Family hug," he smiled,

"Almost, without Cassia," she said,

"Please no one move her now she's asleep," I laughed, 

[dear-mortality]

The shepherd prince

Chapter seventeen:

Chapters

Tw: abuse , domestic violence , assault , blood mention ,

Ether was gladly dragged along with enfys towards the group that called for him

"Alright im here so let's get to it"

They were a group of four, They all looked at ether for a second

One of them with silver curly hair waved at bun before they all started moving

He felt awkward but he got over it quickly as he walked around with them and saw the witches using their magic to build their camp.

Some planted a seed that they used a spell on to grow into a nice little cabin

Some made simple tents.

Though one of those tents was made of volcanic rock, the owner was especially proud of it.

As ether was occupied the people with enfys took that as an opportunity to talk to him in a low tone

"Hey uh you didn't exactly introduce us? Who is this person??" Said a man shorter than enfys, wearing a loose button up shirt full of stains shoved into some baggy pants and wearing leather gloves that were barely his size, with short wavy black hair on his head and stubble on his chin and jaw line

"Yeah like is he really not your betrothed? I'd say he's exactly your type."

Questioned a woman with pale skin and a button nose and cat like eyes, her short silver hair styled as a Bob cut and wearing a fancy dress with the front of it torn up to the knees and a saber sheathed on her side.

"I need to ask. How much wolf is he? Im pretty sure he may flare my allergies but i REALLY want to touch his tail." Asked a guy wearing a trench coat over nothing with plain pants and a white hat over his straight brown hair, his face and chest full of freckles and his waist full of potions of all colours

"It will be interesting seeing someone get all the questions i got when i first entered this group" stated a person with dark skin and dragon horns on their head, wearing only pants that stop right at their crotch with their torso covered in scales but a jacket over their shoulders like a cape. Their body covered in scales that are iridescent and with a long tail right at their tailbone.

"Whispering won't make much of a difference, everyone. He can hear us perfectly." enfys said while looking back at ether and met buns eyes, immediately and acted like he didn't hear anything and looked away in embarrassment.

"ok then let me introduce you! This is ether, the prince of my nation of origin. You know uh, the one that got cursed. He's under a curse that we can't decipher for some reason even though mom made it. Right now we're going on a journey to find the archmage because honestly i have no idea what else to do at this point. We've grown to be good friends." Enfys stated before turning to him "ether these are some of the closest people to me in the coven, the guy with short black hair is beiqis, the one with some dragon features and hair braided is malaje, the girl with curly silver hair wearing a 'practical gown' as she likes to call it is cyerosa and the one hoarding- i mean keeping potions on his waist is faqe. Sorry for the seemingly rude comment at the end we like to joke that he's hoarding them because they're pretty."

"I am." whispered faqe towards ether

"The short descriptions aren't giving us much character you know?" Stated beiqis with a smile

"Yeah yeah but its easier for you guys to reveal your character than have me describe it" enfys answered

"Well, i certainly quite like how you handled my introduction." Said cyerosa gleefully

"Yeah because he used more than 3 words on you." Interrupted beiqis

"Oh don't be like that! Your short hair is a wonderful trait about you, seeing that everyone here doesn't seem to bother even styling theirs half the time."

"Im ok with not being introduced in detail too. I don't like anyone describing me when im around." Malaje added without showing any facial expressions

Ether smiled at them all nervously before his bubble revealed him thinking that they were all very good looking

"ooooooo someone has nice taste i see~" quipped faqe as ether tried to strangle the bubble.

He turned around and tried walking away while embarrassed before bumping into the guy with volcanic armour as he was quietly standing behind them, ether was too focused with the group to notice him approaching

The armour was hot to the touch so ether hissed a little as it burned for a second

"Hey! Watch where you're going." He yelled, his hair seemingly catching a little fire.

Having heard that voice everyone froze and looked at enfys with a scared expression

Even ether felt the tension

"Naphees i wanted to talk to you about something-"

"You. Do not. Get to call me that, Trevor." Grunted enfys, not even turning around.

"Babe please i want to fix what's between us-"

Before he could finish enfys had stomped the ground making a force field that pushed everyone out, no one outside could hear or see them.

"thanks. Was kind of uncomfortable talking about this in the open like that."

"Hmm and yet you were quite comfortable with forcing me into talking to you in private! How curious! Have you no shame?" Enfys pointed out

"Naphees-"

"ENFYS."

".....enfys. im sorry for what i did i really am, I've been apologising forever now why won't you forgive me? Don't you believe im sorry?"

"You hurt me. You used something to block my magic and BEAT ME UP BECAUSE YOU WERE JEALOUS OF SOMEONE I WAS WORKING WITH AND LEFT ME THERE TO BLEED WITHOUT SO MUCH AS A POTION TO HELP ME HEAL. HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO FORGIVE YOU??? OR TRUST YOU???"

"Listen i know it was bad but don't make yourself the victim here! You know how i felt about you being around other men and you kept going out of your way to be with them! YOU KNEW IT WOULD MAKE ME ANGRY." Trevor yelled, flames swirling on his head

"Its called BEING SOCIABLE and PROFESSIONAL and DREADING BEING IN THE SAME ROOM WITH YOU BECAUSE EVERY TIME WE HAVE A NICE MOMENT YOU RUINED IT WITH YOUR JEALOUSY AND POSSESSIVENESS. THAT'S NOT TO FUCKING MENTION THE ASSAULT AND THE FIGHTS AND THE VERBAL ABUSE. WE'VE BEEN BROKEN UP FOR 2 YEARS NOW WHY CAN'T YOU JUST MOVE ON??"

"I CAN'T JUST MOVE ON FROM YOU!! I LOVE YOU!!"

enfys laughed hysterically

"Yeah it shows. Making me uncomfortable and hurting me verbally, mentally AND physically, draining me, using hurtful words AND BREAKING MY BONES when i point out your hypocrisy- yeah these sure are how you show love to someone and it tells me alot more about you than you'd like to hear." He responded with his voice shaking from how upset he is

"UGH you NEVER change do you??? Will you ever let my mistakes go?? You know what your issue is? you think im clueless. I know you're dating that new boyfriend of yours just to spite me so why bother playing around when im here to take you back !?"

"HE IS NOT MY BOYFRIEND! YOU JUST PROVED WHY WE WILL NEVER BE TOGETHER! YOU ARE JEALOUS, INSECURE, POSSESSIVENE AND IMMATURE."

As this was happening ether kept inspecting the area where the field is and trying to hear or see anything

Faqe held up a potion and looked through it at the field to see Trevor and enfys arguing intensely

"Yup they're going to fight. Everyone get ready to beat Trevor up."

They all stood in battle stances as ether looked a little nervous and decided to act.

With one slash at the field he tore it open with his claws and gave trevor a death stare while snarling a little

"I don't like you." His bubble stated.

Trevor was going to fight before looking around to see everyone is ready for him

"Ugh. This isn't over." He left huffing and stomping, every step burning a trace into the ground and his hair fully engulfed in flames.

After he left ether looked worriedly at enfys

"Sorry. They said you might fight so i had to act before any of you did." Ether apologized knowing he interrupted something that wasn't any of his business

"No. What you did was perfect. I really almost slapped him near the end. it would've escalated from there."

"Would it be wrong to wish ether didn't interfere so i could see Trevor's stupid face swollen with a slap mark?" Questioned beiqis

"Talk about a dilemma. i actually wish the same thing." Responded cyerosa

"indeed." Faqe and malaje agreed in unison

"Sorry guys but i have to go back to my room in the castle. Im pretty shaken after all this." Enfys interrupted, unenergetic and shaken.

"Its ok enfys. We're here if you need us." emphasized malaje with a sad look on their face.

"Thank you. Im going to have to rest after this." Enfys mumbled as she left in a hurry

Ether quickly followed without saying anything the whole way. They reached their room and sat on their beds.

"Ether i know you have questions. You can ask them now. Thank you for waiting this long."

Ether hesitated for a second

"Who was that? Why did he call you naphees? And why were you fighting?"

"That was Trevor, he's my ex boyfriend. He called me naphees because that's also my name, enfys is more like a pet name but I prefer using it over naphees. I dumped him after he beat me up because of his jealousy and he has been trying to reconcile ever since. This was two years ago. He keeps doing this whenever we see eachother but it normally gets violent real quick. i make sure to leave him limping every time."

Ether was horrified and furious

His entire face showed a mix of rage and sadness and shock

"Ether before you think of anything please don't get between us two. I can't promise to protect you if you get on his bad side because he's really..... really good at picking the times when you're most vulnerable to hurt you...."

Ether felt like crying after hearing the pain in enfys voice. He quickly hugged him tight.

Enfys smiled softly before patting ethers back

"Thank you. I'd like to sleep now."

"Yeah. Me too."

They both went to bed and closed the curtains to block the sunlight. Ether could hear enfys sobbing quietly and his heart broke a thousand times over with each sniffle he heard.

[nii-chans-rabiddogs]

Weird Doctor

TWs: drugged character, restraints, muzzle. It's extra long, but I'm not sure where to cut it so I haven't. lemme know if i need to add any other TWs if theyre missing, please. Have fun <3

@cupcakes-and-pain @maracujatangerine

It feels like I’m floating in syrup, cuz everything is nice and quiet and slow, but it’s also too cold to go back to sleep. I wriggled around until realizing that I’m not on a bed and there is no blanket, sadly. I opened my eyes enough to figure out that the cement I’m laying on isn’t covered by anything. Why would I sleep on cement? It’s not warm or comfy at all, and I always trip over the cracks and skin my hands or knees, it's the worst. Wait, there’s a blanket, but it's on the other side of the room and I don’t wanna get up. I stared sadly at it for a bit, letting my brain melt away. Eventually I got too cold and tried to get up, but my arms shook and everything started spinning just a little bit so I laid back down. I huffed, and tried to remember what happened but I kept getting distracted by how cold it was. Why would anyone ever make it so cold? Why would you torture yourself like that? It has to be at least 71 degrees for me to feel comfortable and even then I hide under the blankets. It definitely isn’t that warm in here, and I wanna leave but the only way out is a weird door with a flap at the bottom. 

Actually, the door looks like those ones in movies, yknow? The ones for cells to hold the prisoners, all steel and whatever metal doors are made of. It looks really heavy though, and the room is pretty dark. I can see alright, but there’s no light coming in anywhere. There’s also a ring in the center of the room, which is a trip hazard. You shouldn’t put things out in the middle of the room with no light source, someone’s gonna break the ankle tripping on it. I wouldn’t though, cuz I never trip ever and anyone who says I do is lying and should be banished from my kingdom. Wait, I don't have a kingdom. Do I? Oh well. It would be nice to have a kingdom, just relaxing all day getting to eat all the chocolates and not having to do anything. Maybe I should start my own kingdom, but people say it’s hard. All you gotta do is declare yourself king though, so I don’t understand what they think is hard about that. Maybe they can’t make themselves king? I could make all the people kings, but only if they promised to leave my kingdom alone and give me chocolates.

Suddenly, the door was shoved open, and I closed my eyes against the very bright light that came with it. That was scary, it dragged on the ground and made a really loud noise that hurt my ears. I opened my eyes to glare at it, so it wouldn’t do that again. Oh hey, when they get here? There was someone standing in the door, with a weird thing in their hands. 

“Oh good, you’re awake. Let’s get this on you, I need to take you down to the medbay. You lost quite a bit of blood, and we need to fix that. Getting more is a pain, by the way, so if you lose any more I will drain you dry myself, understood?” They said, walking up to me with the weird thing.

I tried to say something but it hurt and I started coughing, which hurt more. I huffed, cuz I couldn't do anything else. The guy crouched down, setting the weird thing on the floor nearby. He unfolded the weird thing, which had other things inside. He grabbed what looked like one of those shock collars for dogs, but without the spikes on the inside. She- wait, is she a guy or a girl? I can’t tell. Oh well. They slid it under my neck before pulling it tight and clicking it together. Rude, I’m not a dog. I’m not even an animal, everyone can see that. Maybe they need glasses? The weird person was wearing a doctor trench coat, which is even weirder than a normal trench coat, actually. The weird doctor pulled another thing from the little pile that was already mostly gone, and it looked like an odd fabric mask.

He lifted my head up and placed the cold metal part under my chin, and pulling the top metal piece over the bridge of my nose. I tried to watch, but my eyes went cross eyed and made me dizzy, so I just stared at the weird doctor again. They tugged on it before clipping the two back straps together around the back of my head, and then making it really tight somehow. I winced and tried to move away but the weird doctor just yanked my head back and told me to stay still or else, so I stopped wiggling and glared at them. They started pulling on something on the side of the mask thingie, and then that side was really tight and I couldn't open my mouth at all. They started doing the same for the other side, and I tried to move again but it was hard and really slow, so the weird doctor just shoved me back onto the floor.

He yanked my hands behind my back and click-clacked super handcuffs onto my wrists, right over the cuts from before. I tried to pull on them, but it just made my wrists hurt really really bad so I just laid there while the weird doctor went out past the door. It was still cold, but now it was worse cuz i can’t move and everything hurts. Weird Doctor dragged in a moving bed, like the ones in hospitals for patients. Weird, a doctor would never let it get this cold. I’ve never seen a doctor before so I’m not sure. Or a hospital. Movies show them all the time, and they always seem really loud with everyone yelling and weird machines beeping or screaming. Maybe Weird Doctor is a worker for a quiet hospital? Quiet hospitals seem like they would be more secret-ier, so they have to be super secret and make sure nobody tells.

“Alright, runt. I’m going to lift you and if you kick me, I will break your ankle. Behave.” 

That was the only warning I got before Weird Doctor lifted me up in the princess carry and set me down on the moving bed. I wanted to kick him but it felt like I was gonna throw up and I didn't wanna do that. I can’t even open my mouth at all, and I didn't wanna have to swallow puke. That’d be really gross and icky. I jerked when my wrists got crushed under me, and it felt like someone lit them on fire so I rolled onto my side. I took a deep breath, but it didn’t make me feel any better, and nothing made any more sense. Hopefully Weird Doctor could fix my wrists, and maybe give me some chocolate. I’m really hungry, but I can't ask for anything cuz my throat hurts, and the mask keeps my mouth clamped shut. 

Weird doctor started pushing the moving bed out of the dark room, and out into the hallway. I didn’t look very different, but there are lights which is nice. No one will trip, cuz now they can see the ground. Unless they’re distracted, like the one time Detective walked into a door while reading a case paper. He dropped like he was shot too, which was funny cuz he cussed like a sailor, whatever that means. I heard Ms. Secretary say that to someone, but I'm not sure what it means. He did cuss a lot though, and he said I shouldn’t repeat any of it to anyone who looked like a reporter.

We passed by some other rooms, but they all had the same type of door, so I couldn’t see in. I heard something whimpering in one of them, maybe a dog? That makes me sad cuz doggies are really nice and fun to play with, they shouldn’t be hurt. Maybe if I ask really nicely, Weird Doctor will help them too? We passed more doors, and I could hear yelling from some of them, which was scary. I don’t like when people yell, cuz they get really loud and mean and scary. Weird Doctor just kept pushing the moving bed along, and the yelling went away. Weird Doctor is kinda nice, but I don’t like the super-cuffs cuz they hurt my wrists more, or the mask cuz i cant open my mouth at all, or it’ll pull on my nose and make that hurt too. Maybe if I was good, Weird Doctor would get rid of them? And, and maybe if i was really super good i’d get chocolates and something to drink. My throat felt really dry and scratchy, and that was worse than it hurting cuz I can’t scratch my throat. 

Weird Doctor walked us around a corner, and suddenly there was an old elevator, like the ones in the scary movies. It looked a little different though, cuz there’s red blotches everywhere and I thought rust was orange. Maybe rust gets darker the longer it's there? The elevator jerked, and suddenly it felt like I was climbing but without actually doing anything. It was cool, but also made me feel sick again, so I ignored it and listened to the music that was playing from somewhere. IT was really nice and calming and made me feel sleepy again, but I don’t think Weird Doctor would like it if I fell asleep again. The elevator dinged, and Weird Doctor pushed the moving bed out of the doors. The walls were really bright, and they were white. I was right, this is a hospital! But it's a quiet hospital, cuz I don't hear anyone yelling, and nothing is beeping. It’s really nice. They pushed the moving bed really, really close to another bed, and lifted me onto that one instead. Why would they do that? The other bed was just fine. Probably a Quiet hospital thing. Weird Doctor undid the super-cuffs, but then they rolled me onto my back just to strap my wrists down to the bed. This is a little unnecessary, I couldn’t do anything before, so what’s the difference? They walked off, so I just laid on my back and rolled my head to watch them. Weird Doctor pulled out a tall, rolling thingie and hooked a red bag to it. 

They dragged it over to me, and shoved a needle into my arm. I huffed at the prick, but then the tube it was connected to started to fill with the red stuff. It looked really super familiar but I can’t remember. It was definitely a hospital thing though, but usually the bags are clear. Maybe I get to have a special bag cuz I'm a special boy. I’m the specialiest of boys, so that makes sense. Weird Doctor kept walking around and grabbing things and setting them on the table right next to the bed. I didn’t see that, maybe it's to hold all the chocolates and medicine things Weird Doctor is setting down. They need to make sure to leave enough room for the chocolates, though, or else I’ll have to beat them up. Chocolates are the most important-y things ever. 

I blinked slowly as Weird Doctor started filling needles with something, but it’s getting hard to stay awake cuz it's warm. The heat made me tired, and I couldn’t keep my eyes open. Hopefully Weird Doctor wouldn’t be mad at me, but they also never said anything about not falling asleep, I think. They’ve been nice so far though, cuz they haven’t yelled at me at all. Still don’t like the mask thing, so he’s not the nicest but he’s nice enough. I rolled my head over t o look at the ceiling. It was a pretty grey color, and I stared at it while falling asleep. Blue would be prettier though, I think.

[captain-astors]

if you’re still doing 003 reqs i’d LOVE to hear what you think of tatara! he’s one of my favorite characters so i’m biased </3

I am indeed still doing these, and still thriving. Here we go!

How I feel about this character: 

So cool looking, the white trench coat and mask combo is so stupid and pretentious but it works somehow, and the fact that it has emotional value actually leans to the silly side of it in my mind. I’m not sure why, I think I’ve just wired my own brain incorrectly enough to go “haha you have emotions.” But I’m going to tell that portion of my mind to be quiet for now, because he has an excellent design, though it could stand to have a few more defining traits, and he looks a bit like a pokemon gym leader.

Oh! Also, Hands down coolest Kakuja and I wish I’d seen it before the Kakuja polls, in which I so foolishly voted Uta or something, thinking there could be no better. How wrong I was, FLAMETHROWER KAKUJA. The mere combination of words invokes awe. I could roll it around in my mind for hours. Continuing the pokemon comments, it really feels like the evolution of his normal outfit because it is also pretentious and stupid but somehow works and it’s really cool anyways. I didn’t realize how… large it was supposed to be before I saw a screenshot of the anime’s portrayal. It always felt human-sized to me, perhaps a couple feet taller but no, it apparently has the dimensions of an 8-wheeler and I don’t know how to feel about that. He definitely doesn’t really have a grand plan he’s just chilling with these comparatively much worse people while doing nothing particularly remarkable himself, he’s mostly just a functional figurehead eating grapes and providing the method to the madness that is Aogori. Eto had plans but she’s not going to take the time to carefully direct them herself. It’s a thankless job but might as well have the pale beanstalk who was-a-mask-wearing–kakuja-before-it-was-cool do it. He doesn’t seem to mind, or at least he’s just going to be in the same bad mood regardless.

Any/all the people I ship romantically with this character: 

Just secondhand HouTata. I observe it. Live in antagonism, die alone, perfect. The golden standard. Neither of them are happy. Be like them, fictional couples. Also I like the thought of Tatara being awful at cuddling but the natural warmth makes it nice anyways. 

My favorite non-romantic relationship for this character: 

Ayato. “I don’t care about him at all, not worth more than the dust beneath my feet without about the same usefulness- oh they grow up so fast.” Go put what can only be described as your awkward nephew to bed, I don’t know why you thought it was a good idea to let this child into your terrorist organization Tartara, but congratulations he’s yours now.

My unpopular opinion about this character: 

I have few opinions on him and none of them are very strong so it’s difficult to find an unpopular one… his personality gives the profound impression of an undersalted pretzel stick standing upright inexplicably, and a shade of light green-grey. When lost I just spew a small piece of my constant stream of nonsensical, slightly unhinged simultaneous thought processes. 

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: 

More screentime. Yeah he existed to prove points about other characters but you’d think the debatable leader of Aogori would be a bit more fleshed out.

Favorite friendship for this character: 

Eto! Mutual respect, terrible decisions, fun times.

My crossover ship: 

Maybe Rem. Or Luida. These are just my end-of-ramble thoughts now. The song I listened to for most of this has several instances of very goatlike screams and they were never where I thought they were no matter how many times I looped it. 

[just-a-little-darkness]

The Unwanted

Ao3

She was trembling, and she couldn’t stop.

Emma wasn’t sure why – beyond this being a terrible nightmare that she wasn’t able to wake up from – but there was certainly something about this that felt… real. She’d had vivid dreams before, but this? Something was different, and she couldn’t explain how.

Still, despite the strange journey through space and time being hauled like unwanted baggage by a shadow with glowing eyes, she was able to make it on unsteady feet and run.

The shadow didn’t try to stop her. It just watched as she ran away, deeper into the foreign jungle.

There was something fantastical about the jungle that, at the time, she wasn’t able to place but later recognized as dreamlike and magical. She passed by a particularly shaped rock seven times before realizing she was running in circles.

Lungs and calves burning, she gasped and sobbed to a stop, leaning against the rock.Just where was she?

Voices, close and mocking, called out for her. She didn’t recognize them, but she knew that tone. She’d heard it many times in different homes. It screamed of danger.

And so, she hid. She hid until a hand covered her mouth and pulled her even further into the darkness.

“Don’t scream,” the voice breathed into her ear. A puff of warm air curled against the lobe. 

The person gripped her face and arms tighter as an army of people ran past – crowing and cawing like mad men. When they were mere long lost whispers in the wind did the person holding her release her.

When her arms were free, she curled her hands into fists and whirled around to them.

A boy – brown eyes and brown hair, nothing particularly memorable or discerning – smiled shyly back at her. 

“Sorry,” he said, his voice still soft. “They do this to – you’re a girl?”

“What’s wrong with that?” she said, looking him up and down. His clothes were old and well worn and the heavy bags under his eyes carved out trenches to hold the bruises from lost sleep. They were highlighted by the frown taking over his face.

“Nothing wrong with being a girl. It’s just that, well, he doesn’t want girls here.”

She frowned at that, crossing her arms in front of her. She wished that she was wearing more than her buffalo plaid pajama pants and Pink Floyd t-shirt. Socks and shoes, at the very least.

“Who doesn’t?”

The boy gave a soft laugh, wiping his hands on his trousers.

“We need to hide,” he said after a moment.

“If you think I’m going anywhere with you –”

“Look. If you’re here, it’s for a reason.” The boy’s sharp, brown eyes met her, making her breath catch in her throat. “Pan doesn’t keep girls. He wants nothing to do with them. You, though? You have to be special.”

“Pan?”

“I’ll explain later.”

“And you expect me to go with you?”

He sighed, running a hand through his hair.

“Look,” he said, “this isn’t a safe spot to discuss this. They’re going to come back, and they’re going to be a lot less nice than I am.”

“And why should I trust you?” she said, tugging at the sides of her t-shirt.

“You shouldn’t, but I can get you back home.”

She barked out a laugh.

“Back home?” she said. “Unless you can make my parents magically appear, you won’t be able to get me back home.”

A frown pursed his face as he contemplated.

“You’re an orphan,” he said. “Me too.”

She… wasn’t sure how to respond to that.

“Look, I’m trying to get to a world with no magic. You can come with me.”

“How?”

He held his hand out to her and gave her another shy smile.

“I know a way back. I just haven’t had a chance to try it yet.”

She hesitated a moment before grasping his hand.

“Okay,” she said. “What do I need to do?”

His face softened and he smiled wider.

“Not much,” he said. “Just trust me. I’ll make sure you get back home and out of Neverland.”

[sticker-journal]

Sticker Ver.1 2019-2020

NAMES WILL BE CHANGED FOR PRIVACY OF THE HUMANS IN THIS STORY.

In the summer of 2019, I was kicked out of a band who shall remain nameless. I wasn't good at guitar and a terrible singer. (I still think that I am lmao) Even my previous soulmate, (who shall remain nameless) would tell me to leave the house because she couldn't stand my playing. I'm sorry.

I was heartbroken and stuck working at a shitty Walmart. I hated that place. I wanted to slash myself with a box cutter and lay down in the isle just so I could go home.

However, I was more determined to start my own band, so I posted everywhere on my social media that I was looking for a drummer and a bassist. Months passed and I found nobody. Until one of my best friends, Jian. introduced me to a man named Pat.

Pat and I met briefly, on Jian's balcony at a gathering, and we smoked cigarettes, drank tea, and spoke to each other about music, humans, babies being trippy, and drugs for about 2 hours. He asked me to move to Seattle with him. I couldn't do it, thats's crazy! He said drugs were really easy to get out there and we could start a band there.

I declined politely, then he moved away to Seattle.

Focused on finding bandmates, I posted flyers that I had created by hand all around town and only got calls from people who... lol let us just say it wouldn't have worked!

Months flew by, suddenly Pat failed miserably by himself in Seattle, then suddenly moved back. He asked me to meet him at a park near his house to drink and play our guitars. He could't smoke pot because he had some mild schizophrenic episodes in the past.

When we played guitar together, it sounded beautiful. I sang along to the riffs I was playing, and he pretended that his guitar was a bass. We created some lyrics on the spot together for fun on an old tune, and we had immediately decided to start a band together.

I jumped up and danced around, and thanked the Universe for blessing me with a bass player and friend!! I laughed and cheered because I was so happy.

Myself and Pat returned to his mom's house and we drank and smoked cigarettes in his backyard. His family had a very nice backyard. I complained "I wonder why I can't find a drummer! Why is it so difficult?" He replied "I know somebody. I have a friend named Rich and he's a GREAT drummer! Let me call him! He might not answer though."

Pat called, Rich answered. Pat asked to meet the next day and Rich accepted.

The following day, we arrived at Rich's door, a well-lived in, loved, but dusty house. We waited, I sat in a chair in anticipation.

Suddenly a man opened the door, he was wearing a long black trench coat, dark sunglasses, and had very long hair. I was a little confused, startled, and mesmerized by his energy all at the same time.

He welcomed us into his home. "WOW! you have big amps? A drum kit! There's mics! There's a couch! And a radio!!" I was so happy and bouncing off the walls, I asked if I could play his kit, and he let me.

Rich went to the bathroom for what felt like forever and returned wearing a tank top and shorts. He showed me his amps and how they worked, I asked him about his life and his musical experience. Pat plugged in his bass, the mics were turned on, and then we started playing.

I began playing a simple chord progression that me and Pat had practiced. The drums kicked in, and oh shit! This was amazing! I was finally, finally jamming with a real band, as the main guitarist! Pat looked at me and mouthed "sing!" but I was way too shy LMAO. We finished the mini jam and then I asked Rich "can I try to sing a song that me and Pat have been working on?"

We started the song "He's back" and I showed him how it goes, I sang the playful lyrics and kept stopping, because I had NO idea how to sing into a mic. I felt very embarrassed, but Pat kept encouraging me to sing. I finished the song with a loud, wild, and unexperienced scream.

I felt super embarrassed but I asked him anyways. "Do you wanna be in our band?" He said yes!

We hung out many times and played and created a set of about 5 songs. We were doing shrooms a lot, and playing music and listening to music too. I was showing them parts of my journals and discussing ideas all the time.

I couldn't figure out a band name! I was trying for months to think of one, but I couldn't nail a name that fit with the music. We tried many names like: The Zebras, Tooth, Bad Luck Bois, Piss and Ass, Elemeno (like the abc song), Scenic Root.

None of it felt right. I just gave up lmao. Then one day while sitting on the couch, with no pre-meditation, no reason, without a plan, like a lightbulb flashing on above my head, the word "Sticker" came out of my mouth. Then I just kept saying Sticker, and then it stuck. That's the band name! They said they liked it too, so I was glad they didn't shoot my idea down. They never shot my ideas down.

2020 rolled around and we were finally about to play our first show! The date was scheduled for March 23rd, 2020. I was so excited. All of us were!

Covid-19 hit, then I lost my job as a Security Officer at a prestigious hotel in Las Vegas. Everyone was stuck inside. I mean, people decided to go out anyways LOL but I chose to lock myself in my room and I definitely had no issues with that! AND collecting unemployment?? LET'S GO!

Meeting with Pat, Rich, my best friend, and my ex-soulmate were my only reasons to go out. I thought, "Wow! Quarantine is a great opportunity to practice hard as fuck and then come out strong when it's over!" I continued to play relentlessly at home until the tip of my pinky would rip off and my fingertips bled.

My dream of becoming an amazing band was crumbling. Pat started introducing me to drugs i've never tried before, such as MDMA, Coke, maybe some of that shit might have been laced with meth, some of it was pure, taking larger amounts of acid, shrooms, alcohol.

I felt alone, all of my friends and loved ones, I was pushing them away without realizing it. All I cared about was getting blasted out of my mind and playing guitar.

Sometimes I would go on 5 day drug binges, alone in my room, playing guitar, watching concerts, playing games, writing, smoking cigarettes and taking long walks here and there.

One night, I had taken acid in my room, but suddenly the trip didn't feel.. fun or comforting. Something had switched in my mind. I looked at a painting on the wall that my Grandmother had passed down to me. It struck a chord, and I looked down at my hands.

I suddenly felt scared, I started panicking. I saw that my body was an explosion of particles and flesh, and it freaked me the fuck out. I stepped outside, and realized I was a human without an umbilical cord. I felt that my halo above my head was faint for a moment, and I started becoming even more scared.

I took deep breathes and lit a cigarette, the sun was rising, and when I smoked the cigarette, I was taken to the place that the tobacco had been planted and grown. I couldn't do anything without seeing the literal creation of everything inside of my mind.

I just kept hitting the cigarette and walked even farther down the road. Once I started walking back down the road, I went back home and laid in my bed. My room was in the back of the house, by the washroom, hidden, the smallest, and farthest away from all of the other rooms in the house. I was staying at a friend's house because their mother saved me after I became homeless at one point in time.

As I started drifting off, I looked at the clock and said to myself, "OH SHIT! I was supposed to take my little cousin to work like I promised! I'm gonna be late!!"

I got into my car, still slightly coming down from the acid and picked her up. We drove to her work, and once I parked I looked at her. I threw the cigarette out of the window and started crying extremely hard.

"I'm so sorry Cousin, I'm so sorry. I can't believe what I have done to myself and my mind. I don't think i'll ever be the same. I can't stop doing drugs and trying to escape reality at any costs. I used to be so kind and smart and energetic. I love you, and I want you to be able to rely on me. I'm gonna stop, I promise. I'm so sorry."

She wasn't mad at me, she didn't look at me differently, she comforted me and supported me and said that she will always love me. She headed into work, and I went back home to sleep.

I took acid again less than a week later, and then after I came down, me and my ex-soulmate decided to visit Arizona to see my father.

By the way. My ex-soulmate had NO idea that I was doing so many drugs. I was keeping secrets from her out of guilt. I'm so sorry.

Anyways, let's rewind just slightly.

During the heavy covid lockdown phase, I was hanging around Pat and Rich, and their semi-large friend group they had sucked me into. We all did drugs together. Everything revolved around drugs and Sticker.

I soon began to notice that we were doing more drugs and "partying" more than band practice. It started to piss me off. Pat started bringing women around more and more. Women came onto us, and all Pat could think about was MDMA, Coke, and having sex with men and women. I became depressed but stuck around, because this was my first band, and I didn't know that there were more possibilities in my future. I thought that this was the only version of Sticker. "Soon we'll stop fucking around and focus on music." Pat never listened to me. He would lie, and skip band practice to go do mdma at a park with women. Rich always canceled band practice.

I started losing all faith in things.

Anyways, a while after my little acid breakdown in front of my cousin, Pat, Rich, and I met at a park to have a band meeting. Pat really wanted to get something off of his chest.

"Our friend, I got really drunk with her, and we had sex. When we woke up the next morning she claimed that she didn't want to do that and was really upset. I thought she wanted to!"

I was pissed. While for a moment I was glad he came forward and had the courage to be honest, but then something didn't feel right. I felt like this was a 3/4th truth, I may be wrong though. I trust my insticts.

"What the fuck is wrong with you? Are you fucking kidding me Pat? We are NOT that kind of band! What the fuck!" I scolded him and we talked more about the situation.

I drove home, and I was so upset. Rich seemed to be upset too. This was my first time experiencing something like this.

A few days later after not talking to anybody, I met with Rich. We decided to go on a hike, we walked together up Lone Mountain. Our goal was to reach the top.

Before our quest, Rich pulled out some type of gel, and said it was an extremely powerful form of THC. He squeezed it out of a syringe type of tool onto my finger, and I rubbed it all over my gums.

We walked, and I became very high. I realized how high I was about halfway up the mountain. We reached the top, and there was a big metal disk at the edge of the cliff.

We were together, Rich was quite a few feet behind me, and I joked "HEY LOOK! It's our record deal!"

Rich responded loudly, "Whoever touches it first, gets the most money!!"

I laughed and rushed for the metal plate, but Rich passed me somehow and touched it first. I was confused at the way he ran past me so quickly.

We sat for a while, and I told him "Look Rich, we can't play with Pat anymore. I don't want to. We need a new bass player. I want to be an inspiration for the humans. I don't to be on some young kid's wall one day holding a cigarette, standing next to a man who only sees people as sex objects, constantly doing drugs, and fucking people for his own pleasure. He infects people with drugs every time they are around him. I don't want this."

"I agree." He said.

We climbed down hiked down the mountain. He drove back with me to a park. We sat down at a park bench table together.

He told me a story about a girl he once dated in high school. Her name was Jenny, and he took a blade and carved a J in his right hand. He still had the scar, the mark. He said "Now I can say, I've always got a J in my hand." Haha, pretty clever I guess.

I asked "Rich, why do you want to be in Sticker? Why did you choose to be in a band with me? Why do you do this?"

Rich then told me "Dennis I want to be in a band with you because I like your songs, I like your voice, and I think we can make money together. We are going to be so Rich. We are going to live off of this music, and I will have everything that I want."

"Is this the only reason why you want to be in a band? Money?" I asked.

"Yeah... of course."

I was turned off. I was sad. As Rich and I began to walk away, he said "Me and you should totally take acid together at my house sometime. I can show you some things and open your mind to stuff that you have never seen before."

Rich was a lot older than me, almost 17 years older. I became slightly frightened without Pat by my side as usual, and I just said "Yeah! Some time..."

I went home, still high from what he gave to me earlier on the mountain. Suddenly, I felt like lightning had struck the top of my head.

I was in a dark red room. One of my best friends was crawling towards me, he had a chain on his neck, he was naked, crawling on all fours. He was panting like a dog. He said "Come on Dennis! Come join us."

I looked up, and I saw Rich sitting at drum kit, shirtless, a ripped and muscular body, laughing hysterically, and chin pointed towards the ceiling. He cocked his head down toward me and stared. His eyes were completely black, pure evil. Pure evil. His hand was down my his crotch, and he was forcing my ex-soulmate down on himself, she couldn't breathe. I saw Pat fluttering around the room with demon wings, an adult face, with a beard, fat cheeks, but the body of an infant. He was acting similar to a cupid. Then, I saw a billboard with Rich's face on it. He was famous, alive, and smiling. He had taken my bright smile, and life. I was dead.

I jolted out of the vision and let out a small scream. I knew this was a message from above. I need to get out. Everything hit me all at once.

I started remembering when me and Rich and Pat hung out all the time and did drugs. They said things to me that I didn't think much of at the time. Pat said something like: "Yeah me and Rich actually share an ancient demon bloodline. We are the lions and you are our lamb, we will sacrifice you. You will be the final one to sit in the chair of music, and all of music will end with you."

I began to panic, I remembered that most musicians who "sold their soul" met the devil and he appeared in all black. The devil offered them everything they wanted and tricked the musicians into accepting his tempting deal. "Those are JUST stories though!! That can't be fucking real. I'm going crazy." Rich had shown me everything the day I met him. He showed me everything, he had all the gear in his house that we needed to record, he had his own practice space in his living room, all the things that amazed me that I didn't know before. I freaked the fuck out.

I was soon being kicked out of my friend's house. I think they knew I was doing a lot of drugs in secret there. I was about to become homeless, and then I told my best friend everything that had happened. We got an apartment together with some friends. I had to beg them to let me stay because I was going to be homeless again. Thank you for helping me.

The first month living there, I was doing drugs still every other day and had a shrooms trip. Shit I needed that one. I saw so many things. I met God. I was blessed. I was shown suffering and torment, and then grace and love. Thank you.

I did drugs one last time, an extremely small amount of MDMA. I felt scared because I saw a terrible vision and felt that I was abusing my beautiful mind again and God was angry. I went back home to my apartment and sat on the ground and cried because I couldn't stop fucking up.

I decided to end the band. I sent a long text to both of them after an entire day of drafting. I told them my morals did not align with them. I don't play music for sex, drugs, fame, or money. I play music because I love music. I play it for myself, the beautiful humans who need it, and God. For everything.

They were pissed.

Then, I broke up with her. I told her the truth about everything. I wanted to be honest with her. For once. I'm so sorry. Goodbye. She hates me now, and I will never blame her. I hope you're happy and loved to the fullest by everyone around you! Thank you.

One day, after crying in the shower and having a panic attack again, I stepped out, and started at myself in the mirror. I hated myself. I hated the old band. I hated everything they put me through.

Then I looked at myself and said "YOU!! FUCK YOU! You did this. It's all YOUR fault! You did this to yourself! You did. Not Pat, Not Rich, but YOU! You made those choices to lie and do drugs. YOU did. You did this to yourself! Stop blaming everyone else!"

That's the day that I grew up.

I crushed my cigarettes, threw them out the door, I didn't do drugs for a long time after that. It was really hard to quit all substances. I locked myself in my room, I played games to comfort myself. I met my cat Misty. She became my best friend, one of my soulmates. I love you Misty, you saved my life. You gave me a reason to live and stay at home.

I didn't play guitar for almost a year. I mean, I picked it up here and there, but I needed to take a break. I never thought I'd start a band ever again. I cried a lot, and I hated myself.

I began to tap into my old self again, no drugs, no smoking, consistently working out and practicing martial arts, I got a good job, and I became stronger within my Mind, Body, and Soul. My friendships and family became stronger, and life started getting better.

I have been scarred from that experience with that band, and to this day, I still struggle with sad thoughts, and fear that they tried to take my soul. I'm not dumb though. I mean maybe a little bit LMAO but not that dumb. I'm getting better though at pushing those thoughts away though. I can do it almost instantly now as soon as they try to attack me.

Anyways, that's Sticker version one for ya!

By the way, listening to old recordings from that band, WE SOUNDED TERRIBLE xD lmaooooo

There's no WAY those mfs were gonna get rich and famous LMAO they were trippin xD

sorry if theres a ton of typos lmao

[shakespearerants]

15 Questions 15 Minutes

Thank you for the tag @neverland-in-space ! I already did this like 10 years ago (gefühlt) but I love talking about myself so here we go again 😈.

1. Are you named after anyone?

No, but my parents are The Epitome of scatterbrained scientists so. It is very possible I am and they just never told me.

2. When was the last time you cried?

Uhhhhhh good question I don't remember. I almost cried when @freizusein picked me up in the middle of my Odyssee to grant me heat asylum in her apartment a few weeks ago, does that count?

3. Do you have kids?

I call my houseplants kiddies. In other words no.

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

No, I don't, but people think I do bc apparently I have a tone?????? Please know if I ever asked you something sarcastically and you thought it was an excellent joke - I was serious and I'm still waiting for my answer.

5. What sports do you play/have played?

Team sports? Soccer in elementary school. Am not a fan of collective excersice unless we're talking (ballroom) dancing.

6. What's the first thing you notice about someone?

VIBES. My Freitagsstammtisch can attest to that I've been complaining about someone at uni all year based on a 5 sec interaction and it took me multiple days to even notice they have very very prominent tattoos.

7. Eye colour?

Greenish - brownish.

8. Special talents?

Ohhh boy. Charming older (as in your grandma older) women. Especially antiques dealers. Got a deal on some very nice brass pendants when I was in Leipzig the last time just by being me and looking a little bit sad. I was once gifted a whole ass diamond ring on the street by a woman wearing a fur coat in 35° weather. I have had MULTIPLE elderly women come up to me when I was walking the dog UNPROMPTED and tell me about their dog who recently died. Last time I went to my local antiques shop I was offered 100€ discount on a ring I was looking at within 5 mins of walking through the door, and I hadn't even brought up the price yet.

Also I am unfairly good at doing things, especially art related things, perfectly after watching someone do it once. Was very surprised in 4th grade when I realized not everyone can weave a whole 12cm Perlenarmband with design in 45 mins on their first try.

10. Where were you born?

In a town with a MASSIVE causewayed enclosure. I'm talking multiple trenches multiple ha crop mark visible over 3 different fields.

11. What are your hobbies?

Ceramics (looking at, sorting, reading about, counting, collecting thereof), churches (insert "I just think they're neat!" Meme here) (as in looking at them and usually grumbling about those damn neuzeitliche Umbauten), Adventures™ (can't leave the house without having one!), cooking, reading, painting, sketching, embroidery, I've made a resolution to get into making my own clothes, houseplants, writing.

12. Do you have pets?

I technically own a rabbit but she lives with my parents and younger siblings.

13. How tall are you?

Child sized according to the helpful measuring sticks at Ganzbeck.

14. Favourite subject in school?

Art, choir. For a very brief period of time maths.

15. Dream job?

Grabungsleitung of a really really big Forschungsgrabung on the Baustelle of the wannabe Lindners I went to school with. I want to see their faces when I tell them they can get their building privileges back in 5-10 years if they're extremely lucky. Let's leave the fact that I haven't even finished my bachelor's yet and really don't want to stay in academia out of this fantasy.

Tagging: @lachricola @evolutionsbedingt @freizusein @perchingowl @clueless-dullahan @frubeto and anyone else who wants to have a go!