#like can u even believe were gonna live to see that. god damn

[merlions]

1 year sobriety date falling on Friday October 13th = cool !

18mo sobriety falling on homestuck day = *John Oliver voice*..........................."Cool."

[amourtoken]

so I literally cannot stop thinking abt this here u go

god kink Noah and softie Christian reader

I already know I'm going to hell so no need to remind me ik this is filth but that's what's fun abt it also basing the looks of the building off of this big ass church I used to go to and it's very weird and industrial so apologies if it's confusing

*NSFW below the cut, MDNI*

cw: sacrilege lmao, degradation, raw sex, oral (f receiving), dirty talk, Noah kinda thinks he's better than everyone else, maybe bc he thinks he's God idk, corruption, loss of virginity, experienced Noah, dirty talk, slightly public, belly bulge, dacryphilia

♡ Noah's only at church cause he has to be, otherwise why the fuck would he waste his morning here. He sits through the awful music and wonders how all of these people live such a lie, its pathetic to him. The only thing that makes it bearable is the pretty little thing in the little white sundress that never fails to show up every Sunday.

♡ he thinks you're so cute. Brainwashed, but cute. All he ever thinks abt is how he could desecrate you and how you'd look so much prettier worshipping him.

♡ Noah is damn near your exact opposite, covered in tattoos, always wearing dark colors. He never really talks to anyone either, keeping to himself. You'd say he was miserable if you didn't see his face soften a little every time you catch his eye. You try to make a point and interact with him every chance you get, maybe he's lonely? You can't let that happen. He's the worship leader's son, you'd think he'd be having a better time but who knows what's going through his head.

♡ Noah almost feels bad that he can't keep his thoughts in order when you walk up to him, pretty smile plastered on your face. You're chattering about today's service and he's picturing his hands on your hips, fingers digging into the soft skin while he bucks up into you and gets to hear those pretty little noises he's sure you'd make. All he'd have to do is pull your dress up too, it'd be easy. He's nodding along with your conversation and trying to seem interested but it's getting harder and harder to pretend he's listening.

♡ his eyes drifting to the neckline of your dress which is pretty modest but God he'd be able to pull it down so easy, tease your nipples while you grind yourself on his thigh and whine for him to fill you up. His eyes snap back to your face which is etched with concern.

"Noah, are you feeling alright? You seem out of it."

♡ he could lie, but what's the point. Isn't lying a sin?

"I'm fine. Just thinking about how pretty you'd look split on my cock."

♡ did he really say that??? You weren't sure how to even respond. Or if you should at all. You were flushed down to your chest and Noah admired the pretty pink tinge to your skin. He was almost nervous he'd fucked up but he knew what to say to have you following him like a little sheep. If you can sit through service every week and genuinely believe the shit his father is saying, you'll do anything if it's said in the right tone.

"Bet you've never even fucked before, have you? Saving yourself for marriage and all that bullshit. You know I could make you feel good, you should let me show you."

♡ you're still stunned, standing like a little deer in some headlights. You'd be lying if you said you didn't find Noah attractive but you felt like he wasn't in the cards for you. He's everything you're not, but maybe that's what's so enticing about him. How he talked about your beliefs stung a little but you couldn't help the way your thighs pressed together at the thought of him and his suggestion. He'd never hurt you, right? You can trust him, why would he wrong you?

♡ Noah nodded toward one of the exit doors, turning to leave and hoping you'd follow. You nearly tripped over your own feet trying to catch up with him. Your brain felt fuzzy and you knew whatever he was gonna put you through was horrifically sinful but you can be forgiven for being curious, right? Noah locked the door behind you, leaving you both in an empty stairwell. Hopefully no one tried to interrupt the two of you, because Noah was immediately to work. He walked you backwards until your back was pressed to the concrete wall and he tangled his fingers in your hair, pulling until you whimpered and keened against his hand for some relief.

"The only fucking God in this building is me. I expect you to treat me like such."

"You answer to me, and you follow my fucking directions, yeah? Gonna be a good girl and do what I say?"

♡ you felt your heart race terribly in your chest from how close he was, you felt like a prey animal being stalked by a predator. You really didn't know what to expect, you've never done this before. You shouldn't be doing this at all...what have you gotten yourself into...

♡ Noah surprisingly sinks to his knees in front of you, hands brushing at your knees and sliding up your thighs, hiking up your dress as he goes. His long fingers hooked under the waistband of your panties to tug them down and he threw one of your legs over his shoulder, without warning burying his face in your pussy making you yelp and tangle your fingers in his hair for some balance.

(Something like this yk)

♡ you pulled his hair tightly between your fingers, whining while he lapped at your pussy and groaned against you when you pulled a little too hard. You felt pricks of pins and needles all over your body, it felt like a swarm of butterflies populated your lower stomach. Oh god...one of his hands steadied itself on your thigh but the other slid up to glide between your folds, gathering the slick mess before prodding at your entrance making you squirm. He was right, you hadn't done this before. He wanted you to enjoy yourself though, that's why he was taking the time to stretch you out and make you cum, so you could actually take his cock afterwards.

♡ the fingers at your entrance slid in slowly, stretching you out and scissoring slightly to spread you further. Your legs were shaking and the swarm in your belly felt 100x worse. You were worried you couldn't hold yourself up much longer...Noah pressed his fingers as deep as he could fit them, brushing your cervix and curving up to press right into the most sensitive spot he could. He laughed against your pussy when he felt you clench around his fingers, teeth brushing your clit and making you whimper pathetically above him. He was the one on his knees and you were unraveling. Pitiful.

"You gonna cum for me? Can't let you take this cock till you cum, won't fit."

♡ when he nudges a 3rd finger in you completely come undone, tugging his face closer to you and nearly crying while you grind into him through your orgasm. He speeds his fingers up inside of you until you're squirming and begging him to stop. He withdraws and stands back up, reminding you he towers over you at his full height and he licks your slick off of his fingers right in front of you. You're still panting and your legs feel shaky, this isn't helping.

♡ Noah thinks you look adorable so shaken up, he can't help but admire how your chest is rising so quickly and your face is flushed. He did that to you. He's gonna do so much more too. He backs you into the wall again and runs his hands down your thighs, picking you up and pressing your back into the wall for extra support while your legs wrapped around his waist. You threw your arms around his neck to steady yourself but he wasn't gonna drop you, he could hold you up for hours if he needed to. Again though, he thinks you're adorable and lets you think he could drop you just to get your heart racing again.

♡ he holds you up with one arm while freeing his achingly hard cock with the other. You didn't even really get a chance to see it, but when he drug the tip through the slick mess between your legs you could describe the feeling as dread. He felt huge. Noah leaned his head against your neck, pressing soft kisses up to your ear and nipping at the soft skin.

"Gotta relax for me, promise I'll make you feel so good...trust me"

"Can't wait to feel how tight this pussy is, can't believe I'm your first. Bet I'll be the last too."

"Gonna fucking ruin you for everyone else, gonna be mine forever, yeah?"

"So much for staying pure, hm? All it took was one little comment and here you are letting me fuck you raw in a stairwell. Wonder how your god feels about that."

♡ he'd planned on taking it slow but after sinking in just a few inches he couldn't help himself. He trusted up into you, hilting himself in one move and sank his teeth deep into your shoulder to try and muffle the groan that escaped his chest. He slapped a hand over your mouth as he sank in and thank God he did because the sound you made was nothing short of a scream. Big tears welled in your eyes even after all the work he did to prep you, the stretch of taking his cock felt almost too much. Noah was loving every moment, watching you fall apart for him. He pressed a large hand to your stomach as he started fucking himself into you just to feel how deep he fit in your poor body.

"O-oh god-"

"The only fucking god you should be praying to is me."

♡ your whimpers and moans were nonstop but thankfully muffled against his palm, he didn't want anyone interrupting you. You gripped his cock just fucking right and he doubted he could really last long but he needed to have you unravel on his dick before he could finish. Noah reached up and tugged the front of your dress down, leaning to absolutely cover your chest in hickeys and lick at your overly sensitive nipples, your whines pitched up when his teeth got a little too rough but he couldn't help but admire his work. Your pretty soft skin marred with teeth marks and bruises. There's no way you could walk back out there and have no one notice, everyone would know exactly what you did, and who you did it with. Perfect.

"bet you've been thinking about this just as much as I have, huh bunny? Needed to get fucked, needed to get filled up by some fat cock, yeah? Tell me."

"Your little god was keeping you from this, does he really feel better than me? Wanna hear you say it."

"Gonna cum again for me, bunny? Need to feel you squeeze this cock, you can do it. I got you."

♡ your head fell back against the hard wall as he fucked into you, the coil in your stomach tightened unbearably. Every thrust sank as deep as he could possibly get and made your legs shake in his hold. Noah was chasing your pleasure as much as his own, he loved seeing your pretty little pathetic expressions. He slid a hand between your bodies and barely even had a chance to brush your clit as you came. His arm around you tightened to keep you still as he fucked you through it, tears spilling from your eyes and ruining your pretty makeup.

"S-shit- that's it- good girl, feels good yeah? So good for me-"

"That's it, tell me who's making you feel this good baby say my fuckin' name- n-need to hear it"

♡ his thrusts picked up in intensity, fingers sinking into your hips hard enough to leave Bruises and he sank in impossibly deep as he shuddered through his own end, you whined at the feeling of his hot cum filling you up and the extra dripping out of you making a mess on the floor under you. It took a second for Noah to set you back down on shaky legs, he helped you straighten your dress back out before pulling you in for an uncharacteristically gentle kiss. He felt like he was a little harsh on you but he was happy you actually would do something like this with him finally.

"So pretty...we should do this again sometime, yeah?"

[hoffmansgirl]

Honestly, I’m getting tired. It’s literally bts pics from a tv show. He’s not even playing Jesus in the show. People are just looking for a reason to hate him at this point and it’s really pathetic. I was not okay with him posing with those guys and I felt like people had a genuine reason to be upset with him, but I also thought double standards were rearing its ugly head again. Let’s get mad at nick for posing with guys dressed as Lyle and Erik but let’s like and repost thirst edits of Nick and Cooper made up of scenes from a show where they play … Lyle and Erik Menendez. People are holding him to a standard that other celebrities aren’t held to. He can’t do anything without people picking him apart and “canceling” him. It’s honestly annoying.

YES YES YES 🗣️ louder for the cunts in the back!

nicholas chavez is not problematic.

so. i actually feel so bad for him because it must be so hard. he's just gotten popular how long ago... a month? two? and people are trying to cancel him so bad.

he can't do ANYTHING without getting hate - first people started bringing up his love life - since when is it anyone's business? calling him a bop, a man whore. people are feeling way too comfortable nowadays.

next ━ "nicholas doesn't support the brothers", "he doesn't give a fuck" ━ how can YOU know that. he doesn't owe anyone a ny thing. he doesn't need to be as vocal as cooper is about it ━ as i wrote in here aaand here. i honestly won't even talk about it anymore after this post because it's fucking annoying.

the picture with the dicks dressed as menendez brothers ━ disgusting. i'm not gonna defend this one because well. he could have refused to take it. he's a grown ass man, for gods sake. although, as i mentioned before, he is HUMAN. he is LEARNING how to be a big star, what he should and should not do. let's not pretend we are all angels, bffr. we all make mistakes, and sometimes we don't even realise we do something that might be considered wrong.

now... the (hot) god damn pictures... can we stop being so sensitive and fucking annoying!!!!!! 😁 i saw that post and thought that he looks so good, the brat dance made me smile sooo much ━ then i saw the comments... he is not. mocking. religion. he is not mocking your beliefs or your god.

"cancelling" an actor for being an... actor is fucking embarrassing. i just have to laugh.

why is everyone so obsessed with this man, with everything he does? why are haters the first ones in his comment section? god, even i am not that fast and i'm fucking obsessed with the guy. come on... people just hate to hate.

and! surprise! he doesn't owe you an apology ━ if you're offended by the pictures ━ because it's just the show. people think he dressed up as jesus for halloween... do your fucking research. read the caption. stop harassing the poor man i swear 😭

in this house we don't hate on nick ━ of course he needs to be held accountable for the menendez brothers picture, no explanation needed ━ but nothing else.

it's kinda funny because my man is just working, being an introvert and people think he's a soulless narcissist.

i guess people just hate rich, popular and hot men that live their best life... i kinda feel sorry for them, ngl.

and one more thing before i finish... nicholas' love life. the insults i've seen online are so concerning. why are people so comfortable to comment on other people's relationships? why do people believe everything they see on tiktok or twitter? calling him a "man whore" is wayyyy too much. like let this man breathe around another woman? or have female friends? god forbid talk to another woman...

i don't want to comment on his girlfriend because... i want need her man, why would i even talk about her 😭 i have my own opinion but lemme just not...

woof woof i'm yapping. but yes anon, i agree with you. 100%.

and finally! if u wanna talk about it (or just talk about nicholas...) then my dms are open!

and remember!!!! to treat people with kindness ♡ 🫧

(celebrities are also people).

[aestherin]

KEEP MY HEART

goal 09: do you like sweets?

You are fully self-aware that you have delusional tendencies, but you know yourself well enough to think that you weren't that far gone yet to the point that you will start seeing your long distance crush right in front of you.

He's probably real.

Taking notice of your presence, Scaramouche then turned towards you. His face was hard to read, other hand holding his phone and the other inside the pockets of his denim pants. His oversized black shirt was tucked, highlighting his good figure.

'Holy. He's got good style too,' you thought. It was simple, yes. But he carries outfits so damn well.

But what is he even doing here in your uni?

Since an eye contact has already been made, you flashed a sheepish smile and a light wave. Your loud personality online was such a huge contrast in comparison to how you're actually behaving now.

He just stared. 'Oh. So he's the cold type. God, he's exactly my type.'

"Aren't you going in?" You snapped out of your musings upon hearing his voice.

"I was about to. I'm starving," you chuckled. He scoffed. "I could use a bit of food, too."

"We should eat at the birthday party then."

"Kazuha's?"

You nod.

He looked away. "Go and eat inside. I'll find another place to eat at."

You flashed a look of disbelief. Scaramouche raised a brow in confusion. "Dude, you're literally already at a restaurant and you still want to go somewhere else to eat?"

"And you're hungry, aren't you?"

He sighed. "Look, I don't know if you know this, but the one holding a party — well, we're not on the best of terms."

Oh. Yeah.

There's that thing.

How the fuck could you forget that the love of your life is from the rival of your brother's team?

"Ah," You nod again. He seemed to take it as you understanding his reasoning and turned the other way, attempting to head off.

If only you hadn't tugged at his shirt.

"What the?!"

You led him to a lone bench at the parking lot, lit warmly by the streetlight just directly above it. "Sit there and wait for me."

"Excuse me?" He hissed. "What am I? A dog?"

"Your words, not mine." You grinned. "Just do as I say, okay? It won't be long, I promise."

He was about to retort but you cut him off by hurriedly entering the lively restaurant.

When you got back, you easily spotted Scaramouche who was sitting comfortably on the bench where you left him. He immediately scooted over once he saw you.

"Wow," he remarked. "You know I actually doubted if you would even come back."

You chuckled as you sat and handed him his plate. "Do you have trust issues?"

"Shut the fuck up."

"Oh, so you do."

He rolled his eyes.

Your late dinner with him was mostly filled with a comforting silence, with some bits of small talk in between. The only ones left on your plate were delectable desserts, as well as the little pieces of food you left out.

"Do you like sweets?"

"No," Scaramouche speedily replied. "They're disgusting."

You subconsciously frown. "Shame. I like them."

"You can have mine then," he says as he picks up his portion of desserts and transfers them to your plate. Unbeknownst to you, his observant gaze failed to miss how your eyes sparkled in delight at the sight of mouthwatering sweets.

As he did so, Scaramouche also spotted some leftovers on your plate. "Do you not like bitter stuff?"

"My tongue can't handle them."

"Give it to me then instead of wasting food, idiot."

You let out a laugh. "Is that your way of saying you like bitter stuff?"

The man just let out a quiet "tch" before taking a bite.

KEEP MY HEART — scara x reader smau

previous . masterlist . next

SUMMARY —you find plenty of guys around you attractive, but there is only one you’re willing to make the first move on: the guy you first saw during your older brother’s soccer game. spoiler: he's a player from your rival university.

NOTES -> a lot has happened lmaoo i was so busy aaa -> i graduated hs finally :P -> i also submitted my requirements for college haha -> also can u guys believe i'm gonna be in college while my college smau is on going omg -> and apologies for ghosting HASDHADHA (also wtf fontaine livestream tomorrow already whaaat time flies so fast omg)

TAGLIST I (closed)

@lady-elodie @krnzysh @syriiina @unsterblich-prinz @xiaosonlybeloved @xiaomainlmao @cindywasneverhere @coquettemaiden @sunsethw4 @lunavixia @calickoh @arealistonao3 @lowkeyivorie @zyilas @mondaymelon @yukiipc @heartswonder @st0pthatsgay @ozzierenato @astreaa-express @shewolfmiko @lovelyycherries @myaaones @countessqin @aloveablechaos @letthewindlead @lunaavity @local-blueberry-boy @luminestars @layla240 @useless-potatho @atlaszi @alatusorrow @lahsram2201 @sakiimeo @user11918163805279 @vqazx @neigesprincess @kunicrush @yoursockstinks @hotgirlshit5 @mikctp @crucnhice @apotatouwu @yuaenri @sammybeefangirls @miko1ly @deffenferofjustice @etherisy @sagegreenthinks

[galaxycunt]

I Dream Of You

The Punk Buggy fic 😎 just for u my friends @gayafsatan @gingernut1314 @hey-august @rorywritesjunk @operationroots

Modern AU kinda

Let us all think back on the time of hooking up at a show with sticky floors and your ears left ringing for a few days after.

You wouldn’t admit it to a single soul, but you had a crush on Buggy. He was the kind of guy you couldn’t miss in a crowd, you weren’t sure if you’d even recognize him without his clown get up. Sometimes he’d even dress like a pirate, he was a funny guy. Buggy the Clown.

He’d never notice you though, people gravitate towards a guy like that, not someone like you. So tonight, you watched him like always. At point in the night he lost the big red clown nose he always wore, currently on his hands and knees looking for the damn thing while one of his friends held up their phone for a light.

You saw it though, you could be the hero. Before the woman next to you could step on the nose, or your hands, you grabbed it. You felt a cold sweat, you had your chance. Did he know you? You knew the band that opened, surely that wasn’t too weird to bring up?

“Hey! Buggy!”

He flashed a smile, prancing over to you, “holy shit. Thanks!”

“I’m uh,” you were more flustered than you realized.

“What?”

You repeated your name, shouting into his ear. He nodded with a smile, motioning you for a drink. You second guessed the way you nodded as you two navigated your way to the kitchen.

“Let’s go outside,” he said.

This was so fast, you almost couldn’t believe it.

“I’ve seen you around, you live here?”

“Nah, my friend does. They’re the opener.”

“Oh shit! That’s cool!”

You nodded, thinking of the best thing to say as he smoked and drank.

“I know you, Buggy. I really dig the costume.”

“It’s my uniform.”

“Oh is it? That’s so cool, man.”

He laughed, “yeah I can make balloon animals. I juggle too.”

“That’s so fucking cool! Wait, like anything? Can you juggle, uh, sticks?”

He laughed, picking up three random sticks in the yard to juggle. A few people turned to watch, but he only focused on you if not the sticks in the air.

You applauded, “see that’s why clowns are hot.”

He cocked his head, “what’d you say?”

You blushed, “clowns are fun. I never got the whole they’re scary thing. They’re funny.”

He only smiled, letting a comfortable silence fall as you listened to the band from outside. You wracked your brains for conversation starters, you didn’t think you’d get this far.

“Would you like another beer?”

“Yes, please.”

“Stay put.”

You locked eyes with a friend, nodding in approval. This was so embarrassing, everyone was gonna know by the end of the night. You looked at your friend again.

“Fuck him,” they mouthed.

Did he wanna fuck you? Should you try?

“For you,” he bowed, holding out a can.

“Thanks.”

“Least I can do, you saved my nose.”

“Where’s Richie?”

He had a small cat on a leash sometimes, the only other time you’ve talked to Buggy was to pet his cat.

“He’s getting old, left him at home for some peace.”

“Aw, I love that little cat. He’s so good.”

“Well maybe you can come over, meet him.”

“I-I’d love that.”

Buggy stared at you a beat before speaking, “can I kiss you?”

“Yes.”

Why he wanted to do that, you’ll find out later. Right now, all your brain focused on was his lips on yours.

“So why are clowns hot?”

You flushed, “o-oh. My god, uh. It’s kinda like a mask but not? I can get all messy when we make out?”

He raised his eyebrows, “interesting. I like it.”

You tried to shrug nonchalantly, “yeah, man. I like what I like.”

“You’re cute, you know that?”

You smiled so brightly at him, he seemed to love it.

“Come on, you say this is your friend’s house?”

“Yeah.”

He smiled, “so they won’t mind if we discussed this more inside?”

Your heart skipped a beat as he led you towards the upstairs bathroom. He rubbed your back, your hand flew to your cheeks to cover the burning you figured was too obvious at this point.

Before you could say a word, he pushed you against the door, teeth grazing your lips and your ears. Instinctively, you spread your legs, arms holding you steady on his shoulders.

“Do the gloves make it hotter or do you want it off?”

You thought about it, “off. The nose too.”

He laughed into your kiss, squeezing your thighs before he fumbled around with your jeans. You could barely think, you hoped the music was loud enough, the line outside not forming too long.

Would it be too cheesy to say anything? Your hands dropped to roam under his shirt, the cool metal of his piercings under your warm skin sent a hiss escaping his mouth. Your glided your palms against him again, he bit your lip in thanks.

Buggy shoved your pants down, dipping a finger inside you. You couldn’t stay as quiet as you wanted to, bucking your hips into his hand as he fingered you.

“Fuck me, buggy. Oh shit.”

“Beg for it.”

“Please, oh fuck. Please.”

You watched yourself in the bathroom mirror getting fucked, Buggy was only focused on your pleasure. You only had a few moments before someone would really know what you two were up to in here, he thrusted faster and faster.

“Fuck anyone outside, let them fucking hear it.”

You moaned hoarsely as you came around his cock. Buggy mumbling in your ear as his thrust became erratic.

“Fuck, I always wanted to fuck you. Fucking shit.”

You let him fill you up, he didn’t pull out as he caught his breath. He splashed his face with water, looking at the two of you in the mirror.

“Picasso.”

“Shut up, jerk,” you smiled.

You cleaned up the best you could, with Buggy stealing kisses the entire time.

You pretended you were in there puking, looking sick as he slung his arm around you. You were really dehydrated, you wanted to sleep.

“Lemme take you home, go see Richie.”

You nodded, “yeah.”

Buggy smiled at himself before speaking, “make you honk like a real clown.”

To him, the shove you gave him was worth it.”

[j-onedrabbles]

𝒌𝒂𝒓𝒎𝒂'𝒔 𝒘𝒓𝒊𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒎𝒑𝒕𝒔

this list contains writing prompts for fluff, nsfw, and angst. i welcome anyone else who wants to use it to please do!

fluff

"your hair is so soft.."

"it's too cold! come back."

"No. i'm not letting you go. It's too early to get out of bed."

"I'm not going to stop poking you till you give me some attention."

"I like the way your hand fits in mine."

"You can call me whenever you want... even if you don't have a reason too."

"You look really cute in that sweater."

"No, like... it's just, i can't believe you're actually wearing my clothes."

"I've been trying to get ready for like an hour and a half, because i know you're going to look so good and i need to try and match up."

"Your lips are really warm."

"Ssh. Stop fussing. I'm just braiding your hair."

"You are my new pillow."

"Don't get up– i'll do it."

"Stargazing was a good idea."

"I'll always be here for you."

"I'll be here to protect you."

"Don't be silly. I want to stay up with you."

"Your bed head is really cute."

"let's go home. You're freezing and I don't want you catching a cold."

"I'm not going to get sick, you baby. Just let me hold you."

"I'm not moving, your lap is comfortable."

"I know your mad at me, but will a kiss change your mind?"

"God, I miss you so much."

"Hey, let me in. I'm outside with your favorite pizza."

"I'm only doing it because you're cute."

"I'm tired, just cuddle me."

"Sorry for waking you, baby. Go back to sleep."

"Time for bed, sleepy head. Come on, I've got you."

angst

"Please look at me."

"I'm just disappointed."

"You... you never had a problem with it before."

"You're making me think that what they told me about you was right."

"Does it ever stop hurting?" "No, you just make room for it."

"I'm trying, all the time, but it's just too hard."

"I let you down."

"I tried to move on, but nobody is you."

"Do i look like I moved on?"

"I feel like everyone just forgot I exist."

"You're really drunk right now. I don't think you're gonna remember any of this." "No. I'm not drunk at all. You're just blurry"

"Did it ever occur to you that you're hurting me too."

"I just want to forget you."

"How much do you miss them?" "More than I should."

"I'd rather stay in my own head so I don't have to live in the world you ruined."

"It wasn't your fault."

"Don't leave."

"Don't do this to yourself."

"Stop pushing everyone away."

"I need help."

"I'm so, so sorry."

"I thought that if I acted like it didn't matter, the it wouldn't."

"I broke my rules for you."

"Don't make promises you can't keep."

"Damn it, are you drunk?"

"I just need time to myself."

"Let me help."

"You haven't been yourself lately."

nsfw

"I know a workout you might enjoy."

"I want it hard."

"I just want to feel something."

"I swear. I'm gonna fuck the next person that comes through that door."

"I'm either joining or watching, you pick."

"I love it when you act all controlling like that knowing damn well I can leave you shaking under me."

"You're mine."

"I'll let you do anything if you just touch me right now."

"Stay quiet."

"If you can't sleep... how about we have sex?"

"Let me show you why you should stay in bed."

"If you want to keep sitting on my lap, you have to stop wiggling."

"We're really going to fuck here? What if someone sees us?"

"Be a good girl/boy for mommy/daddy."

"If I have to stop what I'm doing then you're not gonna be able to walk for the next week."

"There's people here!" "I know"

"You're still horny? Didn't I fuck you hard enough last night?"

"Spank me. It's the only way I'll learn."

"I'd hold onto something if I were you."

"You can get louder, can't you?"

"I'm really in the mood to tease you today."

"Bite me." "If you insist."

"Just let me finish this/this level and I swear I'll go down on you till you come at least three times."

"I'm going to put some clothes on before you say anything else."

"Were you masturbating?" "U-uh no... I was just.." "Want some help?"

"I won't apologize for marking you up. Everyone should know you're taken."

"You look so good with my hand around your neck."

"If you complain that it's hot one more time, I'm going to give you a reason to sweat."

[grumpycurbur]

i'm just gonna leave this here... CW!!!!! my advice is unfollow/block me if any of the following upsets u, i'll know there's no mind changing that can happen...

At this point… i don't fucking care anymore… I REALLY FUCKING DON'T! Times HAVE Changed…

i've been on here for a few years, but i felt like i wasn't allowed to express how I REALLY WANTED TO FEEL about alot of things because i know i wouldn't be on here if i did. so i'll put it here…

I don't think drag queens should be representing stuff meant for CHILDREN!(like Care Bears and "drag queen story hour") I don't think LGBTQ+ should be persistently and insistently pushed/inserted onto content that's always originally been meant for CHILDREN!!!(Like CARE BEARS!(and it's not just care bears btw believe it or not)) Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer; What the fuck do you think that stands for?????

You can't look at me with a straight face and tell me, "trans lives matter" WHEN I DO KNOW MINORS ACROSS THE WORLD ARE GENUINELY SUFFERING FROM GENDER DYSPHORIA!(individuals confused about their "gender identity") it's messed up. IT REALLY IS! Sadly alot of people have been manipulated to genuinely believe that if they're born a man (parts n all), they're REALLY A WOMAN because their "feelings" told them so… ("pronouns" play a part in it) There are generally 2 sides to arguments like this where people say "think about the children"… I don't think YOU KNOW what that means…

it means let kids be kids!!!

it means no matter how subtly you try to phrase it, you PROTECT the INNOCENCE of children's content, not give corporations (even if they DON'T pay attention), ideas how to present certain characters i.e. Superstar Bear is Non-Binary, or Funshine is Transgender (it was a marketing decision back in the early 2000's, i doubt they ACTUALLY sat in an office room and explicitly pushed this idea that Funshine IS IN FACT transgender). (YOU'RE ALLOWED TO THINK WHAT YOU WANT TO THINK BUT PEOPLE SHOULDN'T HAVE TO BE EXPOSED TO IT AND END UP HAVING TO THINK ABOUT IT). Wouldn't you THINK if MINORS are on the internet in general, they PROBABLY shouldn't see "nsfw" themes and ideas unless they're ACTIVELY searching for it? "shudders" i don't care, LGBTQ+ is OVERALL "sexual identification", IT'S NSFW, stop fucking lying about it and trying to distance it from what it ACTUALLY IS with what YOU WANT IT TO BE!

Do i think EVERYONE who's pro-LGBTQ+ is bad??? (Drag is part of it too, please don't lie…)

FUCK. NO!!!!!

i'm aware of "Gays Against Groomers", and respect what they're trying to do, which is to prevent the "inappropriate grooming" of underaged individuals while also being part of the LGBTQ community and embracing their "pride"!

I just think people have been psychologically scarred by the rhetoric that's been pushed and are in many ways mentally destroyed by it and in need of some SERIOUS HELP!

Some might say "get a therapist"; I say, FIND A CONSERVATIVE THERAPIST! Someone who "morally knows" right from wrong. (i know you'll probably think this, but religion is part of all cultures wether you like it or not; rolling your eyes to the back of your head don't help.)

i wish people were more aware of how fucked up WE, as humans, have truly become, but i guess collectively we may never understand what that means and it's a damn shame…

just because you were told as a kid, "you can do whatever you want as an adult and be whatever you want to be", doesn't mean that there is absolutely NO rules, standards OR morals you have to follow.

FIND GOD! FIND SOMEBODY!! JUST…SOMETHING!!!

I GET IT, PEOPLE DON'T WANT TO HEAR "THE OTHER SIDE OF THE STORY" AND CARE SO LITTLE TO WANT TO HEAR IT THAT THEY JUST, don't. maybe it's time to look in the mirror and start to consider the possibility that, maybe, we are all PART OF "THE PROBLEM"… (personal thoughts be damned to hell)

"The Problem", in that, so many people are becoming more and more of an ever-growing, degenerative culture/society that cares SO MUCH about ourselves on an individual basis, that you don't realize that in the end, you don't CARE ABOUT YOURSELVES AT ALL, OR THE FUTURE, OR ANY THING!!! You wanna do/believe things that's odd/weird to others??? Go the fuck right on ahead, BE YOU! Just don't remind the rest of us, unless we (on an individual basis) are curious about it ourselves. sorry if this all sounded "transphobic", idk what else to tell you, it's my opinion, i believe in "free speech", sorry if you don't.

[ohwell-itsme-but-danganronpa]

[NSFW AU] Forest god Shuichi, bounty hunter Kokichi

Bunny: i didn't think Too deeply on it but basically. roaming bounty hunter kokichi + monster shuuichi kokichi gets in over his head :)c probably vine tentacles involved, because i like those [a little bit later] forest cryptid shuuichi…mmm good stuff the people who hired kokichi to kill him are maybe Not Great they kept fucking with his home it's not his fault he had to dissolve them like a pitcher plant can i add seed ovi

Me: Yes Do it

Bunny: they think kokichi's dead bc he doesn't come out of the woods SNDKHBJJFG

Me: He lives there now Becomes a planter, the way he's full of seedlings

Bunny: he does leave sometimes to take care of business but mostly. happy vine time his feet rarely touch the ground anymore. shuuichi spoils him

Me: Oh? Carries him around or keeps him in bed?

Bunny: i think mostly literally holds him up in his vines shuuichi is the forest, to some extent …does he have a bed, actually?? MAYBE THAT'S WHY KOKICHI HAS TO LEAVE SNDBJFJG u get kidnapped by a hot cryptid and he doesn't even have a house smh

Me: Mossy nest

Bunny: mossy nest could also work!!! comfy little cave

Hina: Is Shuichi a plant?

Bunny: shuuichi is a cryptid/monster that's like. the avatar of a forest? its spirit, but also its guardian

Hina: So do plants grow in him?

Me: I think in this case the seeds have to go Become airborne as seeds do Find some soil to settle into

Bunny: also, airborne??? what do you mean by that bc i can not be seeing the same image you are

Me: I don't have access to translator now but I mean like When the stuff from trees just fly off and people have allergies to that

Bunny: okay yeah i did understand we were having different ideas of the size of these seeds i'm pretty sure

Me: I assumed that they're tiny and in a huge quantity Seeds just suggest that idea

Bunny: they do!! however i usually go for Very Large bc it's fun to me

Me: Like. I thought of tiny orchidea seeds, bc orchideas are cursed with those so I was made to read about that once See, that was fitting in the mer au, but if Shuichi IS the forest then it makes sense he'd have A Lot

Bunny: ooohh that's true but how would that Feel

Me: Grainy cum Not dry tho Just textured Like chia seeds in a drink But more density [everyone disliked that, idk why]

Beez: in my head shuichi just looks like millennial tree

Me: In my he has like a gown with moss covered vines and flowers holding it together Flowers in his hair too, maybe elfish ears, probably lil antlers

Apollo: Okay but if Shuichi is the forest, does he have eyes everywhere? Like he sees everyone coming to destroy his home/him then sees a cute hunter and goes You. You're gonna be mine now.

Bunny: yes, yes he does :) kokichi never stood a chance :) i can't believe this was started over me liking swordkichi a little Too much [design from the official anthology]

Apollo: Imagine just walking into the forest to get rid of a creature but the whole ass FOREST decides you're its pet/partner or whatever now

Bunny: he was gonna melt him into bone soup but he sensed a pure heart and pretty face ok

Apollo: No need to live pay check to pay check when the forest is constantly fucking and breeding you

Dra: Damn does he do that [melt someone] to anyone else when Kokichi can see

Bunny: not when he can see he's very big, he can take care of forest-killers and his favorite pet simultaneously

Me: Feeding his favorite human handpicked berries and honey

Apollo: He's made him a little flower crown that won't die and is making sure he only eats the best things possible

Me: Tries to feed him bugs too, to get him some protein, never again, lesson learned

Apollo: LOOK HE'S USED TO KILLING HUMANS NOT TAKING CARE OF THEM. THERE'S BOUND TO BE A LEARNING CURVE

Bunny: kokichi is half-awake and being lazily fucked so he only realizes when he feels a leg wiggle against his lips IF ONLY THERE WAS BOOKS ON HUMAN CARE he's Struggling i jusg think. kokichi being suspended above the forest floor, strange smooth vines stuffed in every hole large enough, dizzily wondering what theyre pumping into him he's having a very blissed out time kokichi accidentally cuts his hand after gripping onto shuuichi's antlers and shuuichi is HORRIFIED he's pretty sure kokichi is Actually Dying

Apollo: He's never seen blood and Kokichi is currently too blissed out to notice that he's bleeding

Bunny: IN HIS EXPERIENCE HUMANS ARE FUCKEASY TO KILL OK HE JUST DROPS THE GROUND OUT FROM UNDER EM A LITTLE AND THEY EXPLODE he should probably have a much more intimate knowledge of death than this being a forest god but. it's funny

Apollo: Okay but Kokichi accidentally gags when his mouth is being fucked and Shuichi freaks out at that because does that mean he did something bad???? Kokichi seemed to like it though??? He's hopeless at caring for his little human but he's trying his best

Bunny: im imagining their first meeting,, maybe shuuichi's forest is extremely sheltered and humans have only recently started trying to "develop" it.. kokichi shrieking and swinging his sword around while vines hoist him higher and higher they start stripping him and he thinks he's about to die but they just end up poking around curiously wherever they can reach, trying to figure him out

Apollo: Shuichi that's not how you properly get a boyfriend smh

Bunny: he doesn;t know that!! he IS the forest there's nothing for him outside of it

Apollo: Shuichi appears but is absolutely zero help because he also starts poking Kokichi in curiosity

Bunny: he thinks shuuichi is there to help but no, he just wanted to feel kokichi's interesting textures more clearly the human makes cute noises when he pokes him there :D

Beez: would that mean cutting it down hurts him. .. . .

Bunny: yes sometimes death is a natural part of the forest lifecycle but you can't cut him all the way down and expect him to live

Beez: yeah i imagined if it happened naturally he would be fine but if there was smth interfering he would Feel it

Apollo: Kokichi tries to kick him and Shu just pouts because he doesn't know how to respond. He's just interested in this cutie

Bunny: kokichi tries to bite him and gets a vine stuffed in his mouth

Me: This is where verbal communication ought to step in

Bunny: when does verbal communication ever work when kokichi's involved /j

Apollo: This isn't how Kokichi wanted to be seen in front of a hot forest spirit damn it. He couldn't even flirt before getting naked /j

Kai: Human try developing Shuichi's forest and Kokichi is just "AW HELL NAH THAT GUY FUCKED ME TOO GOOD FOR YOU TO UP AND KILL HIM!"

Apollo: "We hired you to kill that guy!" "HE GAVE ME THE BEST FUCKING NIGHT OF MY LIFE! HOW AM I MEANT TO KILL HIM AFTER THAT????"

Bunny: maybe the fantasy seeds he has kokichi incubate are replacements for the killed trees OOO

Dra: I'm sorry but my mind just went to that fucking bird (there is a type of tree that doesn't grow unless the bird eats the seeds first)

Me: Yeah, the forest grown since Kokichi came around

Me: I was thinking something a lil more lovey dovey when you said he stayes in the forest

Bunny: it's lovey-dovey once they get past the Poking phase. shuuichi is very curious and has literally no idea what boundaries are maybe kokichi offers him a deal,,,like 'u can keep touching me wherever as long as you promise to stop eating people'. he does not have his sword and has literally no way to enforce this and is also currently wiggling toward shuuichi's hand but it's fine he's a very serious business man shuuichi is very diligent about aftercare even though he has no idea what that is and tries to feed him a bug he goes "well some of the animals like this" and pulls kokichi into his lap to start petting him humans need protein he's pretty sure he's doing his best

Apollo: Throws touch starved Kokichi into this /j

Bunny: funny you say that :)c the implications of kokichi being a wandering bounty hunter are that he has nowhere to go Home to, yeah? would also explain why he stays in the forest,,,

Apollo: Kokichi really went from being alone and living paycheck to paycheck to being taken care of by the forest itself

Kai: "I got no home but the willow maid fucked me good and hard so i think i like it here"

Bunny: kokichi is like 'stop it i'm not a pet >:(' and shuuichi is like b̶̀̌ȗ̶̏t̷̅̈ ̷̏̚ḯ̷̋ ̵͒̀c̵̃an ̵̓̏s̵͐͠m̷̃͑e̷̎͝l̸̂͗l̸̀ that ̚i̸͗t mak̷̃̎e̶s you ̷̅̚h̵͑̒ä̸͠p̵̎̂p̴̢̆y̵?

Kai: does Kokichi ever repay ;) him

Bunny: yes frequently

Kai: can a forest get off?

Bunny: nnnnot…really? at least in my interpretation he enjoys seeing kokichi happy maybe he finally decides to manifest himself some genitals to see what all this fuss is about NSDJBHSHDGJ

Kai: does he at least smooch Shuichi?

Bunny: YES shuuichi tells him that he is not a baby bird and does not need to be fed. then he tells him to do it again because it felt nice

Apollo: I'm crying because imagine if he made his dick real big because he's not sure what a good size is meant to be

Bunny: kokichi is munching grapes and watching him like no…a little bigger…little smaller…move that a little bit to the left…

Kai: peppers his face in kisses and Shuichi has no clue what he's doing but makes the correct assumption that it's a human sign of affection sorta like wolf licks and accepts it

Bunny: he does it back very clumsily it's too hard and knocks kokichi over (shuuichi vc) ẁ̷͑h̶̎͑a̵͂́ṫ̸͘ ̷̟̈i̶͌͆s̷̉ th̆e̷̽̕ ̵̑̾p̵͑̏o̶͒̕ǐ̷͠nt of t̶͋̚h̸is? ̛i̴̛ have ̓̔ă̵͝l̴̈́̿ṙ̵̐e̸̚̚ạ̸̈dy reprodụ̸͛c̶̛̃ȅ̶̈́d̸̆̕ ̸͐throug̃͠h̸̖̏ ̴you,̿ i do n̸͝͝ò̶̓t̵̂̽ ̴̒́n̴͛̈́e̵͌͊e̴d mammalī̴͘a̴͂̀n̷̾̈́ ̶̔͘feature̷͘͠ṡ̷̆-̴͑

Apollo: Okay but how long would it take for Kokichi to be able to understand him or can he understand him off the bat?

Bunny: he can understand him, he just rarely speaks and his voice is unnerving and layered like all the trees are speaking at once :D and the trees are DOWN TO FUCK- im gonna say there's no elk in his forest. just so kokichi doesn't have to hear his partner make the elk honk

Kai: he's better at birdcalls anyways why can i see him taking Kokichi's clothes off when they meet cause he doesn't understand clothes and thinks the human just got caught in something weird what buisness does a forest spirit have wearing clothes anyways

Apollo: Kokichi trying to explain that he sorta needs clothes and Shuichi does that little head tilt that dogs do because he just doesn't understand

Bunny: i think part of the reason he keeps kokichi is because of how INTERESTING he is. he's making offended noises about shuuichi taking him out of his strange false-skin one second and the next he smells like pleasure because shuuichi touched his chest NOT THE HEAD TILT…. with those antlers bro'd probably knock something over

Apollo: Shu can use magic right? Can he make it that Kokichi is no longer human (at least fully) cause humans don't last forever you know?

Kai: connect him to the forest become one with the moss

Bunny: yes, but it takes kokichi several decades to realize time is Weird okay. he was too busy getting fucked all the time to realize he wasn't aging- he could've ASKED about the mysterious green goo shuuichi was pumping into him it's his own fault really now there's TWO scary forest spirits, good job morons

Kai: what made Kokichi finally realize?

Bunny: would be funny if some humans came through and he realized his clothes were WILDLY out of fashion now bc remember this all started from an outfit

Bunny: hey do you think shuuichi has to be taught what holes are okay like does he go ok mouth makes him happy. ass makes him happy. time to try the urethra- IT WAS AN APPROPRIATELY-SIZED VINE HE DOESN'T KNOW WHY KOKICHI IS SCREAMING!!!!!!

Beez: are u saying he tried to stick it in his ears or smth a NOOOOOO

Bunny: he tries this too but kokichi thinks he's being silly and laughs it off mistake

Kai: god help him

Bunny: god just tried to stick a vine in his dick

Kai: Shuichi finds out it doesn't feel good going in the dick, but the dick going into something sure does

Apollo: Does Shuichi switch between parts or does he just have both at the same time?

Bunny: shuuichi is smooth like a barbie doll

Kai: both is more badass he either has both or none, there is no inbetween

Bunny: he grows whatever kokichi is interested in that day, if they're having face-to-face sex actually both might add to the 'divine' feeling like. he Is life to some extent.. maybe shuuichi eventually lets some people move in,,, just be respectful to the earth and leave offerings of human food with neat textures on the shrine and you'll be alright he's grown strangely fond of humans lately! imagine that

Apollo: Everyone remembers the stories of the forest killing people but nope. Forest dude is calm as long as you're respectful and leave little snacks

Bunny: just…don't seek an audience with him. he'll probably grant you whatever you ask, but is it really worth him having a squirming man in his lap the whole time…?? shuuichi doesn't see the problem

Apollo: Does Kokichi still look 100% human or does he have more fae like features now? (I dunno how to explain it lmao)

Bunny: i think he slowly gains them over the years never as much as shuuichi. but enough to be a little unnerving,, he wanders the villages vaguely unnerving everyone around

Apollo: He would though. He just walks away and everyone rushes into their houses because that's the forest's like boyfriend? Husband? Queen? Theyr'e not sure but they know not to mess with him

Bunny: he brings back lost children

Apollo: He has enough common sense to put on at least a skirt when he leaves the house only Shu gets to see him 100% naked

Bunny: he's wearing the same fucking clothes from several hundred years ago they don't age either, don't question it

Apollo: That would sorta suit the forest spirit vibe though

Bunny: it really does! he's killing it by shoving the offerings into his mouth like a goblin though

Kai: dude dressed in ancient samuri clothes who's rumored to be the spouce of the foreset spirit walks into town-

Apollo: He brings his sword around as well despite not needing it. It's badass okay? It's just annoying trying to return these lost kids to their parents while they're trying to mess with the sword He's sorta missed human food okay

Bunny: they ask him to teach them

Beez: what if he gets a new sword that sorta wraps around his wrist n whenever he wants to bring it out it uncurls

Apollo: He saves the kid of like a rich family and finds a shiny new magic sword among the offerings He sends a bird with a thank you note to their house and the village realizes that they don't just have to offer food. Kokichi also likes shiny stuff People start to think Kokichi is like a crow so whenever he comes to the village, he's wearing new shiny stuff they left for him

Bunny: that cave is about to get So Crowded that's why he walks so weird…he's got bird feets….. definitely……..

Apollo: Kokichi plays along with it and Shu says fuck it and like magics some wings for him because he finds it cute that everyone is calling him a crow

Bunny: (chanting) wing sex, wing sex, wing sex-

[girlbossblackbeard]

s2 brain thoughts: the squeakuel (ep 2)

as a reminder, if u see me posting any of these points as their own posts mind ur business:

-i'm sending my hospital bills to david jenkins for weaponizing thef cuking "you wear fine things well" scene WITHOUT ANY KIND OF WARNING i literally almost choked to death from shock

-hey so what the whole actual fuck is up with transitioning directly from the very painful "you wear fine things well" scene which, as we've already established, has REAL HUMAN CASUALTIES DUE TO THIS USE-CASE, into the "run from me darling" lyric overlayed on top of the god damn shot of ed pAINTING THE BRIDE CAKE TOPPER TO LOOK LIKE HIM AND BASICALLY PLAYING OUT HIS FANTASY OF MARRYING STEDE. david jenkins you have committed crimes

-also!!!!!!!!!! that cake topper has kohl smudged all over it so you KNOW our boy ed has been caressing it against his cheek and sighing longingly

-i know we've all talked about how insane the "ed plays with the wedding cake toppers pretending they're him and stede" scene is but i don't think we've really comprehended how GENUINELY INSANE it is like??? edward teach, blackbeard, the kraken, the scourge of the seven seas, the most fearsome pirate the caribbean has ever known that has recently been on a non-stop slaughtering spree, painted a bride wedding cake topper to look like himself which he then scoots next to a wedding cake topper that looks like stede so he can imagine that he's marrying him. this man carefully rubbed kohl on a cake topper to give it darker skin and darker hair and a BEARD. to make it look more like himself. so he could then. put it next to a cake topper that looked like stede. and pretend. they were getting married. i've written that 3 times now and my brain STILL refuses to fully process those sentences.

-i said it in my first brain thoughts post for ep 1 and i'll say it again: every time im reminded that ed has been crying NON-STOP. EVERY SINGLE NIGHT. for MONTHS. over stede. my wall gains another hole

-the way ed is so delirious in his sadness as he pushes the cake toppers out the window. i don't even have any thoughts on that i feel like all i can do is just note it and let y'all deal with the rest

>>actually I lied, he literally watches them sink into the sea after he pushes them out the window that's so fucked up whomever made that decision to make him do that is so fucked up

-"the sea is restorative isn't it" "YYYYEEESSS QUEEN!!!!!!!!!! I'VE ALWAYS SAID SO!!!!!!!!!!!!" "ohh that guy knows" IS THE MOST UNDERRATED EXCHANGE IN THE ENTIRE SERIES IT LITERALLY HAD ME SHAKING WITH LAUGHTER

-would looooooooooooooove to know what went through stede's head as soon as roach mentioned "some place called China??" like did he immediately think of the kiss or getting sent to the naval academy or the kiss or ed's excitement at the prospect of running away together or the kiss or getting kidnapped by chauncey or the kiss or watching chauncey shoot himself in the dome or the kiss or his flop behavior of running back to his family that doesn't even want him or the kiss or

-the crew of the red flag being so immediately kind and welcoming to stede and his crew <3

-i genuinely cannot wait to watch buttons fully immerse himself in the red flag traditions like he was made to be on that crew

-"how should I put this, your energy is..." can't believe they got hatecrimed like that

-RAT BOY

-HE'S HERE

-OUR BOY IS HERE

-fun fact: i recorded my live reaction to episodes 1 - 3 and posted the clip of my friends and i reacting to lucius coming back because we were quite literally jumping for joy and crying over the reunion and THE illustrious Nathan Foad himself told me it was literally the cutest thing he's ever seen (his words, not mine!!) so we're basically best friends forever now and the rest of my life will be spent chasing the high of the happiness i felt during that interaction

-i am also crying once again over his reappearance and i think that's just gonna happen every time i watch this scene :')

-roach's shocked face when lucius appears is something that can actually be so personal

-the way they all dogpile on top of him because they're so happy to see him bitch what the FCUK

-also stede's STUPID LITTLE "huh!" LIKE??????????? THAT WAS YOUR SCRIBE AND RELATIONSHIP GURU YOU HEARTLESS MONSTER WHERE IS THE ENERGY AND EXCITEMENT AT KNOWING HE ISN'T FUCKING DEAD??????????????

-"i love it" *BIG SMOOCH* "i love all of it" *BIGGER SMOOCH* oh so they're trying to kill me by smothering me in the syrupy sweetness of their love. okay

-okay sorry but lucius's absolutely microscopic furrowing of his brow right before black pete kisses him again. for a split second he had a slight look of sadness which lines up with the very real trauma he's endured and how even in extremely happy moments they can be tinged with sadness - maybe a sadness for the past and the way things could've been if he hadn't been pushed off the boat - and all i can say is nathan foad. ur big powerful acting mind

-we gotta talk about lucius choosing not to reveal that ed had pushed him off the ship in front of the whole crew. i'm still trying to figure out if that was him trying to spare stede's feelings (unlikely considering he lets it all out later), spare black pete's feelings (possible, since he knows black pete idolizes blackbeard), prevent himself from having to relive that trauma in front of his friends when he's not prepared to confront those memories, or a combination of all of the above

-"i fell. off the ship." "that doesn't sound like you. you have impeccable balance, babe" i literally love black pete so much i may legally have to change my name to lucius spriggs

-"toouwelss? what is this? are these jobs?" stede i love you so very much to the moon and back but for the love of god you gotta shut it my guy

-I AM LITERALLY SO EXCITED FOR THE BUTTONS SEA WITCH STORY ARC LIKE IT MAY ACTUALLY BE ON PAR WITH MY EXCITEMENT TO SEE ED AND STEDE PROPERLY REUNITE AND OPENLY LOVE EACH OTHER AGAIN

-ed just. washing the door handle. i dont have any other thoughts

-GODDDDDDD HE'S SERVING SOOOOOO MUCH GENDER WITH HIS LIL HAIR BUN AND MOSTLY CLEANED UP WAR PAINT AND DANGLY EARRINGS AKEFJAPWHFA OPERGJAER

-the way frenchie looks genuinely happy for ed when he says he thinks he got all the poison out of his system and it's a new day :((

-idk much about piracy but i really don't think there's a rule about the new first mate traditionally having to kill the old first mate, i think ed just made that up so someone else would have to kill izzy instead of him. despite everything, despite how low he's sunken into the very dark parts of his mind due to the heartbreak, ed still can't bring himself to deal the killing blow

-"i expect great things from you" might be one of the more chilling lines in that interaction because for THE blackbeard to have not just any expectations from you, but GREAT expectations? that's not a compliment, that's a threat. measure up to what blackbeard thinks you should be or else

-can't comment on the amputation scene too yucky sorry

-stede trying to triangulate ed's coordinates based off of his string of crimes on a map HE drew is me trying to triangulate where tf this season is going based off of buckwild theories i've made up and used as the foundation for even more buckwild theories

-yeah idk what the mushy ass lyrics stede wrote on that map mean but i know they're frighteningly homosexual

-"FUCK YOU. that's how i am" I am SO glad lucius gets to be openly bitchy towards stede it feels like a cathartic release for me personally

-ed's fuckin "heyyyy" to frenchie in the kitchen is both hilarious and unbelievably unsettling

-absolutely obsessed with the writers for once again showing just how scarily observant and intelligent ed is when he calls frenchie out for using his right hand to mime killing izzy even though he's actually left handed

-i really admire how david chose to use a low camera angle that looks up at ed as he reveals to frenchie that he's well aware he hasn't killed izzy yet because taika's performance was already unsettling enough but that specific angle adds so much to his overall menacing presence in that scene

-joel fry's performance in the kitchen scene with ed literally makes me want to bite something he's so good at acting quietly terrified

-this is almost certainly an unpopular opinion but i really would've loved to see more buildup to jim and archie kissing. i just feel like we know NOTHING about her let alone her relationship with jim prior to the two days we've seen them interacting and i feel like that kiss would've felt like a much more satisfying payoff if we had seen more interactions between them before they got to that point. i would've taken delaying that kiss by a few episodes if it meant feeling fully invested in it once it did happen, but i also know the show already has so much material to get through (which is why we should've gotten 10 eps but i digress)

-"hey no one told me this room existed" is giving "i didn't even realize there was piracy happening"

-"take the fuckin leg" is such a perfect line delivery

-love the foreshadowing of olu explaining how the little ships on the war table were all over the place and "some of them were over land"

-roach waxing poetic about the noodles is so relatable

-"jesus christ stede keep your pants on" hands down one of the funniest fucking lucius moments of all time

-sorry but we gotta give a shout out to lucius modifying the chinese fleet uniform so it's sleeveless. the edges are cleanly done so either he was put on tailoring duty at some point and picked it up there or someone on the ship wanted to enable the slayage

-there's something to be said about the fact that the only other man who has lasted being on board the red flag ship is another member of the revenge who was picked up and welcomed into the fold well before stede and the rest of the crew wound up there. something about how stede attracts and retains other people who he can tell are gentle at heart, even if they're putting up a tough front. something about how lucius had bounced from ship to ship until he finally wound up on Zheng Yi Sao's ship where he was allowed to be himself

-"ya don't know............if ya picked up....smokin....." nathaniel buttons my beloved

-OOOOF stede's guilty face after lucius talks about how he must've picked up smoking somewhere. after the crushing guilt he already feels about the ed situation this definitely would've weighed extremely heavy on him

-MY SPICY LIL RAT BOY IS SO IMPORTANT TO ME

-"what the hell is going on in towels" wee john my beloved

-look i know izzy is on the brink of death but he genuinely looks kinda beautiful before ed wakes him up from his shock induced coma and i won't apologize for that

-"my leg" izzy is so fred rechid coded

-"it's up in leg heaven now" i need to know if ed said that as a way of metaphorically digging the knife into izzy and getting back at him for trying to force ed to send stede to doggy heaven in season 1

-i dont have the emotional capacity to dive into the ed and izzy shooting scene rn but just know it destroyed me on a metaphysical level

-"too scared to do it yourself" no because unfortunately now im thinking about ed thinking through taking his own life but coming to the realization that he can't do it. whether it's because of childhood christianity trauma and thinking he'll be sent to hell for doing so or because he knows he can't follow through with it himself if there's still a tiny shred of hope that he'll reunite with stede and everything will be okay again, he always has to outsource the big job

-also, very interesting choice to have almost jovial classical music playing in the background of the ed/izzy scene. it definitely undercut a lot of the tension compared to how supremely uncomfortable and anxiety-inducing the scene would've been if it were dead silent behind the dialogue

-"i loved you...best i could"

-"i've got an ex-wife, two messed up kids probably" LMAO stede acknowledging he would have no way of knowing how fucked up his kids are because of him

-"sounds like you're quite the fuck-up pal" "yeah, i am! and im alone! talk to pete. don't be like me" ohhhhh my god stede is in just as much agony as ed is over this breakup he's just been using his polite society social skills of saving face and never showing how truly devastated you are to others to cover up how supremely messed up he is over all of it. he is BEGGING lucius to talk to pete and NOT make the same mistakes he did because maybe if he can prevent lucius from bottling it up and actually deal with this in a healthy way he can make up for a fraction of all the hurt he's caused not only ed but lucius as well. maybe if he can get lucius to talk to pete he can absolve himself of some of the soul-crushing guilt he feels over how his actions have irreparably damaged the people he cares about the most. maybe if lucius and pete are able to work through this trauma and still come out the other side loving each other just as much or even more than they did before, he can believe that there's still hope for him and ed.

-ed choosing to put on the cravat for what he believes is going to be his last action on earth before dying because he's resigned himself to his fate but is still scared shitless by it and wants that modicum of comfort that stede will always be able to provide him no matter how badly he hurt ed is giving me the urge to find the nearest cast iron skillet and loony toons my skull

-"some people are just broken no matter what you do" noooo why do i feel like lucius was talking about himself when he said that to stede about ed ://

-oof i know they were an unnamed character but fang tried to save someone who went overboard during the storm and wasn't able to :(

-GGGOOOODDDDDDD izzy looks so fucking hot and badass all soaking wet and leaning up against the rigging after shooting ed jesus christ

-"finally" ed was so relieved to have his pain finally end. even after his journey of self discovery in the next episode im really curious how he's going to deal with having to confront the pain he thought he escaped in addition to the pain he inflicted on others while failing to cope with that pain and stopping at nothing, including nearly killing the rest of the crew, to end it

[questionablepastries]

Wahoo I beat armored core (just now now!) thoughts below (and spoilers of course)

I can’t believe they made me fight an upgraded balteus lmao but what balteus wasn’t ready for was an upgraded ME 😈

Good game! Visually very very pretty to look at, mentally I’m clapping a lot at the credits rn lol

And the choices the game made me do lol aaaaaghhh. I almost considered putting the game down for the day when it asked me to betray carla. Same thing with eliminating G1 Michigan, only because I thought VIII Pater was my friend (turns out he’s sick in da head!! Scary guy. Really lives up to his AC name “dual nature” whew) less messed up arquebus members the better. In the end I went with ayre all the way but not because I like ayre but because of 2 things

1) carla she did try to kill me once (she made up for it by saving my ass out of prison tho)

2) (the more important reason why I sided with Ayres idea) — who knows what the ecosystem of the planet would be like with the complete removal of coral, not to mention coral is semi sentient so it’d be like super massacre if I went with Carla (and Walters) idea of destroying it all. ALSO, the destruction of the giant space ship crashing into that coral harvesting place, like what would life be like for the rubiconians? Even worse? Nobody has their interests in minds bc as far as they’re concerned they’re always caught in the middle of some corporation war, so if I sided with Carla it’d be adding fuel to that corporation war fire :(

Like ayre says at the end though, I’m sure we can avoid a fires of ibis situation 2.0 if we work really hard together. 621 is a human that didn’t lose their mind completely after contact with coral voices and maybe it has to do with the fact that they’re a fourth generation human (since the later generations worked out the kinks of not having to hear coral anymore)

Also. During the very sad heartbreaking (for me) killing carla mission, do u know how excited I was to beat the shit out of snail lmao

After reading that his augmentations were only perfected thanks to who knows how many innocent deaths, and his mind re-education shenanigans I’ve hated his ass since DAY ONE. Even IF he’s a sassy funny guy

Ok the ps just told me the trophy for this ending is called liberator of rubricon. Whatever ending that is lol idk what ppl are calling it

God I already miss Walter why’d they make me kill him too lol

ON THAT NOTE I MISS RUSTY I THINK WALTER MAY HAVE KILLED HIM. I’m gonna stick to anime rules for this one and that’s “no body seen no death” yup rusty is still out there (<- copium)

Oh wow ok I guess NG+ just starts like that huh, that’s ok w me I’ll do a NG+ run just to see the other endings, they better not make me actually kill rusty tho that’d break my heart more than it did to take out carla and chatty : (

Also pvp is fun but I’m ok at it lol I keep losing a ton but I’ve had a couple of close matches and won like 4 matches so far

Oh right about snail tho, back in the Carla mission? I was talking mad shit while fighting him like “I ALREADY BEAT YOUR DATA IN THE ARENA YOU THINK YOURE HOT SHIT??” that sorta thing. And u know how dissapointed I was that I didn’t kill him right then and there? His ass escaped that ass beating. Don’t matter tho I terminated his ass for good when he was riding that toddler ass upgraded baby chair balteus 2.0

Idk how from soft does it but they keep making these super super climatic boss fights and super fucking awesome attack patterns that are both visually appealing and difficult to evade/survive but when you do it’s like you’re really in the fight in that moment it’s awesome :) this happened with balteus, balteus 2 purple laser moment, and the fuckinnggggg icewormmmm, malenia elden ring comes to mind (alongside demon souls king of storm)

And I can’t believe they got me with the sekiro monkey “it’s not dead! It’s getting up again!” Moment too god damn that flying boss whew, sad the game wouldn’t let me use that boss’ sweet ass wings as a part to equip :(

Rusty really warmed up to me, initially I was a hater because his ass was always setting me up with these missions that always had an extra lil spice in them meant to kill me or set me up in some way (probably arquebus’ fault) but he…. Waghhhggg………”the first to join” ok cool….ty for being so eager to reunite with me rusty…I honestly thought he was dead after the ice worm mission….and the fucking line he says “there’s only one person who can keep up with me” with 621 in on the comm to listen in on….what are we…….(we’re buddies…)

Great game. And amazing cast of characters, like maybe it’s the voice acting that really nailed it but for me to care about a bunch of people (g1 Michigan…..) that you never actually see in game and only hear is wild lol

I do not care for ayre tho. I’m sorry I’m a hater, she always said some common sense stuff like “remember to dodge” baby we been on how many missions together now please. If she was a deep voiced lady I would’ve been on my hands and knees tho, and if she had a male voice I’d be even worse lol

Cortana ass!!!! Anyways cutest ayre moment was 621 and her watching these giant nuke missles hit a massive structure and she’s like (cutely) “they’re really like fireworks” & I had to laugh and be like we gotta get u some real fireworks ayre they don’t look like this gsvdvdvd

Right and do u know how much I was pogging when the fake raven or Rather the Real Raven showed up??? Damn what was that guys situation about and their handler too? Hmmmmm (dlc potential?)

Fun ass game! Slow start but momentum wise it keeps speeding up and then the end is like WHAM did ya like it and I gotta be like YEAH. I DID. Now I have the urge to play the other endings in ng+ since my AC is geared the fuck up to handle anything I feel like. Kinda wish the pacing at the start stayed the whole way as in slow pacing the entire game with the game letting me kill more shounen protagonist types lol (although that would mean killing ppl like Rusty hmmm my sadism for wanting more murder of naive protagonist types and love for rusty is like oil and water when it comes to that idea lol)

One complaint tho just one, the ost can be somewhat lacking. It has its moments tho!! There’s like 3 tracks that really kill it, and they’re at important moments too. Iceworm, balteus 2.0/snail showdown, and Carla fight are good. The rest went over my head tho sowwy

Now that I’ve achieved credits in this game im a certified armored core fan (even tho this is my first one) and I’m glad this game is getting attention! I really hope they release more AC games bc this kicked ass, maybe they can take a break before taking that on though, because every single mission is pretty breath taking visually, and MASSIVE in terms of sheer size sometimes like damn. Lots of love!

[squarebracketsmileyface]

do u still want songs bc.. don't blame me by james marriott is kina a sorry its locked song

I'm always in need of songs, and oh my GOD how did I not already put this one in the playlist holy shit. It's so fucking perfect, like wtf how did I not think of it myself, you're a genius.

And now I begin a too long analysis of the lyrics in relation to Sorry It's Locked, because I can't help myself and it's the only way I can explain how perfect this song is for Jay and Alex in that damn fic.

You touch me too softly And I know what that means That you don't really love me As morose as it seems

Jay knows, deep down, that Alex being all sweet to him, kissing him on the cheek and the top of the head and cuddling him and all that, doesn't actually mean that Alex loves him. He's hopeful, he wants to believe it, but he knows deep down that Alex doesn't really love him and that it's all either to make him feel better, or to build him up so that Alex can tear him down all over again.

Alex rarely ever touches him softly, that's not their thing, so the sudden change (outside of, like, aftercare after scenes) is super noticeable and instead of being like "Oh maybe he likes me" it just highlights to Jay how Alex doesn't really love him.

When I leave I'll pull on the last of our strings And you'll see That there's always the next thing There's always the next thing

This bit feels more like Alex's thoughts about the whole thing, he's pulling on all the strings of Jay's love and affection so that he can break his heart and "save him" from everything by making him hate him enough to finally actually leave for good and stop trying to help. "There's always the next thing" is Alex trying to force Jay to move on. Obviously that doesn't happen, Jay's completely infatuated and no matter how badly Alex hurts him he'll always want to come back and help him.

From Alex's perspective he's doing something good, breaking Jay's heart by getting his hopes up and then dashing them is for the greater good, it's to save Jay from the Operator. He's giving Jay the chance to live, to move on and find "the next thing".

I'm cutting our ties That's all I can do (Don't blame me) Don't act surprised It's only for you (Don't blame me)

This bit is very Sorry It's Locked, like, this perfectly explains Alex's fucked up thought process about everything he's doing (literally, this explains it better than I did in the Alex pov fic I wrote to try and explain Alex's thinking lmao (in my defence tho, I wrote it to try and fix my procrastination so it was never gonna be great))

The best of our times were the worst of your life Tell me who you're lying to Cover your eyes but peer through the lines 'Cause when I cry, it's only for you

Ouch "The best of our times were the worst of your life" literally just the perfect explanation of Jay and Alex's relationship. Jay's lying only to himself when he tries to act like there was anything good about that relationship and like it wasn't something they both should have called off way before they did (or shouldn't have started in the first place)

All I did was agree To mask all the missteps for our chemistry Was it all you had dreamed? Was I all you hate but you knew that I'd be

This whole bit honestly feels like they'd be sung by both of them (why is this suddenly a duet? Why are they suddenly in a musical? God knows, it's the only way I can explain how this song fits them lol) Like, they both hid how their relationship wasn't healthy, mostly by just not talking about it and acting like they were just friends when they were with their other friends.

"Was it all you had dreamed?" Again, both of them. They knew neither of them were going to change. Jay realised early on that he wasn't going to get anything real with Alex, but he stayed anyway and that kinda made him hate Alex (just in a way that even Jay himself doesn't really realise it's resentment). Alex realised too late that Jay wasn't going to change, that he wasn't going to hate him no matter how much he tries, but he keeps trying to make him hate him anyway.

They were both exactly what they knew they'd be to each other, and they hated it but there was nothing they could do to change it.

I'm cutting our ties That's all I can do (Don't blame me) Don't act surprised It's only for you (Don't blame me)

The best of our times were the worst of your life Tell me who you're lying to Cover your eyes but peer through the lines 'Cause when I cry, it's only for you

Same as above.

No, this path never stops And I'm already sick of the next mountain top No, this high couldn't last In a moment it'll move on and stay in the past

Jay. JAY.

Even back in uni he was so sick of the way his not-relationship with Alex made him feel. They fucked -> he felt amazing -> they went their separate ways -> Jay felt like absolute shit because he knew it'd never mean to Alex what it meant to him. He was just on a constant rollercoaster of the highest highs plummeting into the lowest lows, but the adrenaline of the climb and the drop was so exhilarating (and all that he knew) that it just kept him on the rollercoaster indefinitely.

Then Alex moved away, and uni ended, and for Jay everything was finally gonna be in the past and he could move on. Except he didn't move on because he was unfortunately still infatuated with Alex, hence why all the relationships he tried to have after Alex just didn't work and were only ever about sex.

I have now decided that Jay never kissed any of the people he had relationships with after Alex.

We were never in love So when we were fucking who were you thinking of? No, I'm never enough And I'll fall from your hands straight into your gloves

Again. JAY.

They were never in love and he knew and knows that, but god if he doesn't wish that wasn't true.

Second line... ow. We know exactly who Alex was supposedly thinking of: Amy. (he wasn't thinking of Amy, he just said that to hurt Jay. Dude practically forgot that Amy existed once he had Jay back)

"No, I'm never enough" Jay Jay Jay Jay Jay Jay Jay Jay Jay Jay Jay Jay Jay Jay Jay Jay Jay Jay Jay Jay Jay Jay Jay J

My poor baby and his absolutely dogshit self confidence.

No, this path never stops And I'm already sick of the next mountain top No, this high couldn't last In a moment it'll move on and stay in the past

We were never in love So when we were fucking who were you thinking of? No, I'm never enough And I'll fall from your hands straight into your gloves

Same as above :]

[cherryxsang]

okay so...

“Possession of illegal drugs and evading the law. That’s enough for a few months in the slammer,” the man said with a smirk, bending over slightly and lifting you up over his shoulder with ease. You squeaked at the feeling of his arms squeezing around your body, hitting your fists into his solid back and yelling at him to let you go. Whistling a bit, he simply carried you back to his taller, older looking partner who was leaning against the police car with his arms folded across his chest. YESS HE GOD DAMN DID LIFT ME OVER HIS SHOULDER WITH EASE SJDHKJSHF AND THE WAY HE DOESNT EVEN NOTICE ME PUNCHING THE FUCK OUTTA HIM JSDjsJ

“You have the right to remain silent, pretty girl. Everything you say can and will…” his voice trailed off a bit, focusing on pressing himself against your ass, sighing at the sensation. “…be held against you." SDFJKFH JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP ALYSSA JESUS DKJS PRETTY GIRL>????

“Uh-huh.” Yunho lowered his hand to your ass and grabbed it roughly, before sliding his hand in between your thighs, rubbing at the underside of your clothed cunt, pressing his digits down where he presumed your clit was. “Is this where you keep your drugs? In this little pussy of yours?” adkaodk we love a man who can find the clit 😌 ugh and i dunno if there's any drugs in there 👉👈 maybe u could check hehe 👉👈.....

NOW ALYSSA........ HOW R U GONNA PUT THIS: Yunho laughed a bit to himself, nudging Jongho out of habit. Jongho gave him a gummy smile, looking sweeter than he should have. AND THIS...: If he hadn’t just groped you and taken your hard earned money, you would’ve believed that he could listen to reason, unlike the psychopath that stood there gripping the outline of his unreasonably large package. IN THE SAME PARAGRAPH???? UNREASONABLY LARGE PACKAGE ???? WHAT? ?????

Being finger-fucked by him was almost the equivalent to having a cock inside you, especially if he filled you with three. He had a habit of breaking his toys too quickly, so he decided he would take his time preparing you for the real thing. ummm??? it feels like the cock???????? AIOSDJKSLJ and not him taking his time w us 🥰💅

eyeing Jongho through the rearview mirror, who gave you a cheeky wink, im sorry just this sdhsjdh he winked at us >< ////////

Yunho opened his mouth and dragged his tongue across his top set of teeth, the silver finishing of what seemed to be a bottom set of grillz glimmering in the light. “Kinky. I’d like that.”  eeeehehehehHEHEHEHEHEHEHE ///////////

Jongho chuckled to himself, licking at the corner of his lips. “Are you going to fall apart for him, doll?” You could see his arm shift a bit and the side of his forearm coming in and out of view from where you were sitting. “Are you going to–fuck–cum all over his fingers?” He was starting to sound out of breath. The motherfucker was jerking himself off and driving at the same time. To be quite honest, you were more disappointed that you couldn’t watch than the fact that he was risking all of your lives on the freeway. Maybe you were just like them. Just maybe. DJFHKHS THERES ALOT TO UNPACK HERE........ FIRST OF ALL DOLL TTTTTTTTT yes mr jongho sir i can be your doll /// AND SECOND HES JERKING IT WHILE DRIVING THIS HAD ME GIGGLING ALL OVER AGAIN THATS SO FUNNY 😭😭

Yunho pressed his lips onto the shell of your ear, feeling you routinely squeezing around him. He needed to send you over the edge. “Cum for me, pretty girl. You know you want to.” You pulsed around him, giving him a good idea of what you wanted to hear next. Sending his tongue up along your earlobe and biting it roughly, making you shudder, he growled, “Be a good girl for me and fucking cum.” you cannOT put pretty girl AND good girl in the same paragraph babe youre tryna kill me and i caught you </3 also kissing the shell of our ear thats so cute TT

He tapped his finger against the glass, watching as a tiny bubble formed inside. “You wanna try it?”  “I mean, yeah, but are you sure you want to?” you questioned, tilting your head. “One of my regulars told me he downed a vial and fucked a lovebot so hard, its system shut down halfway through.”  Yunho smirked at Jongho, before pressing his shoulder into yours. “I mean, you’re the one that’s acting as our little lovebot for tonight, so are you prepared for that?” SKFDJDS THIS HAS ME GIGGLING TOO NOT HIM FUCKING BREAKING THE ROBOT DJSDFKDH and im the little love bot hehe 👉👈<333

This discovery almost distracted you from what was going on in front of you. Yunho had grabbed Jongho by the collar, his other hand clutching the back of the younger man’s head, their lips and tongues eagerly entwining, both occasionally biting at each other’s lips. pls bestie this was so hot they drink the vial and then just immediately cant hold themselves back from making out w each other whatttttttt my mind is blown 😭😭😭😭

With your thighs being held open forcefully by two strong hands, you squirmed around inside Yunho’s lap, barely able to handle the visual of Jongho ravaging your swollen cunt, his nose grinding repeatedly against your clit, his tongue buried deep inside your hole, and his dilated eyes focused solely on yours. NOOOO WHY HIS NOSE ON OUR CLIT- “Stay still, kitten,” Yunho purred, gripping the undersides of your thighs and bringing them upwards so that your knees were up by your chest on either side. “Let my pretty boy take care of you.” SJDHK THATS HIS PRETTY BOY </333 Jongho groaned softly at his friend’s sentence, his hand closing tightly around his cock, fisting it with diligence. He plunged his tongue in and out of you, only stopping to purse his lips and let the mix of arousal and spit drip down onto your clit. Eyeing the wetness longingly, he smacked his hand down onto you, sending a bolt of pleasure through your body,before going back down to slurp all the escaping arousal back into his mouth. hhhhhh AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

It only took one forceful squeeze of your clit and the feeling of being stretched open by Jongho’s large tongue for you to cum so hard you saw stars. When you came to, Jongho was licking your squirt from his chin, his eyes hooded and hair completely soaked in your release. NOT A SQUEEZEEE AND HIS LARGE TONGUE SJKADH AND PLSSS THE WAY I CAN SEE HIS HAZY EYES LOOKING UP AT MEEEE HIS CHEEKS WOULD B ALL REDDDD N HED BE ALL CUTE :(

Yunho cupped your cunt and palmed it just to feel your body begin to shudder against his from the overstimulation, smiling fondly at the sight of Jongho’s rampant lust. “Did you like being squirted on, baby bear?”  ummm yes he did cup our cunt and baby bear now you've gone too far bestie....... too far

Your eyelids lowered, feeling yourself begin to pulse in between your thighs. “You’re going to watch me while I get used by Yunho before you get a turn with me.” After hearing Jongho’s small groan and seeing the lust take over his features, you unconsciously spread yourself further open like you were about to take him instead of Yunho, which they both greatly appreciated. AHHHHHHH JONGHO IS SO DOWN BADDDDDD IM FUCKING LOSING MY MIND MY BRAIN N PUSSY ARE OVERHEATINGGGGG

“Fuck, ifyou’re going to smack me, then at least aim for my p–" Yunho’s large hand slammed down onto your cunt, his calloused palm rubbing against your swollen clit, replacing your words with a choked moan and bringing a smile to his sweaty face.  “Again,” you said, your demand coming out as a plea instead, your legs starting to tremble against the slippery couch. “Do it again.” i- im done........ this is end for me thank you all its been nice 👋

Jongho immediately brought his hand down and slapped it directly onto your clit, not giving you a second to react, before he did it again, both him and Yunho watching with delight as your arousal began to squirt out of you like a small fountain. "Good girl," he sighed, sliding his fingers through the wetness and spreading it over your swollen clit.   this- i- im actually done now i cant take it anymore...........words cant explain.........the things im feeling inside.........alyssa.............

Before you could ever take a breath, you were suddenly being lifted up by Yunho and being set down onto Jongho’s lap. “Ready, doll?” the younger man asked, running his calloused hands up along your curves, squeezing at the softest parts of your body, his fingers settling on your tits and tweaking them. “Yes, sir,” you moaned softly, your words flipping a switch inside Jongho’s mind. YES SIR 🫡 *SOBBING* YES SIR 🫡🫡🫡 why's he being lowkey sweettttt w his strong pretty hands feeling us up *harder sobbing* TTTTTT

“Ride me, baby. Make it bounce.” im moving out i hate this fucking family i feel unsafe i feel violated i feel-

Yunho sucked and licked at Jongho’s neck as he nodded weakly, finding his softer moans to be a lot cuter than the deeper, more masculine sounds he tried to make. “She’s our little cumslut now, baby bear. Fill her up with your honey, okay?”  WHYS YUNHO So THIRSTY FOR JONGHO JSDHSDKJFHKJJ AAAHH AND GIRL WHYD U HAVE TO DO THAT W CALLING HIS CUM HONEY 🙃

“Uh-huh, right.” You tilted your head to the side, batting your eyelashes up at Yunho. “You’re lucky I didn’t give you head. I would’ve given your cock a little chomp if I had the chance.”  Yunho flashed you a wide grin, his silver grillz reflecting in the light. “Well, there’s always next time.” shefkjdfkdshfkh a chomp bestie 😭😭😭😭 AHHH THERES ALWAYS NEXT TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HEHEHEHEHE ><

𝔫𝔦𝔤𝔥𝔱 𝔠𝔦𝔱𝔶

pairing: criminal! yunho x fem! reader (criminal) x criminal! jongho

genre: smut, cyberpunk au?? kinda, kinda lore compliant

summary: After finishing up a late night drug deal, you find yourself getting arrested by two suspicious policemen.

w.c: 6.1k

warnings: *possibly triggering content* drug usage, jongho and yunho play a little bit of bad cop nasty cop with reader jshshd <33, hard dom! yunho, dom! jongho, bratty sub! reader, dubcon elements, mxm, kissing, brat taming, degradation, praise, pet names, exhibitionism/voyeurism, manhandling, fingering, spit kink (so muchhh), face slapping, pussy slapping, spamking, oral (receiving), size kink, breeding kink, bulge kink, unprotected sex, sloppy seconds, creampies, squirting, slight dumbification

a/n: choo chooooo 🚂 next stop is smut cityyy – i mean, night city hehe whoops <33 just fyi i renamed the fic and changed the aesthetic to better fit the vibe. also i stg i gave yunho grillz before the teaser came out and i just - someone please write seonghwa with grillz,, i will kiss the ground that you walk on 🧎🏻‍♀️ anyways enjoyy bc this one goes on forever and everrr ٩( 'ω' )و

song rec: numb to the feeling, slow down by chase atlantic

☆ Masterlist ☆

➽───────────────❥

“How much for Night Serum?” a soft-spoken, disheveled man asked you, only allowing you to see his dry, quivering lips and the few beads of sweat that were rolling along his chin, the rest of his face hidden underneath the heaviness of his coat hood. 

Leaning your back against the slightly damp alley wall behind you, your fingers traced the outline of a small pocket that you had sewn onto the inside of your jacket. “120 for a vial.”

He pulled out a wad of cash from his pocket and smashed it down into your open palm. “I want two.” 

You counted the money and shoved it away into your tank top, then fished out two small vials filled with a glowing blue liquid from the small pocket, dropping them into the man’s eager hands. “Pleasure doing business with you,” you said mostly to yourself, the man already fast walking his way out of there and tossing his head back to down it. You watched with envy as he let out a blissful sigh and headed towards a hologram of a beautiful woman that was beckoning him inside the building she was posted in front of.  

With your hands shoved inside your hoodie pockets, you followed in the direction of the man, heading back out onto the semi-empty street and mindlessly walking down it, your eyes settling on the plethora of neon signs around you, some advertising 24-hour ramen shops and bars where you could drink your sorrows away, some flashing red XXX’s at you, enticing you to settle for a quick fuck with a lovebot of your choosing. None of it really interested you these days. No matter what you did, everything just felt numb. Muted. All you wanted was to feel alive again. Before you could think, you pulled one of the little vials out from your jacket and looked down at it, eventually opening it and swishing the liquid around. 

A pair of blue and red lights suddenly blinded you, an irritatingly loud siren joining in as well to overwhelm your senses. “Oh, fuck,” you reacted, suddenly taking a step back once you realized you had done something incriminating right next to an idle cop car. Just your luck. The vial smashed onto the ground just as you ran in the opposite direction, glancing back in horror to see an intimidatingly solid man with large thighs and equally large biceps already catching up with you.

“Stop right there!” he called out, reaching his hand out in your direction, amused by the fear in your eyes and the quickening pace of your steps.  

You carried your body down the pavement as fast as you could, your lungs already on fire from routinely panting and breathing in the cold night air. Your breath escaped your lungs completely when you were suddenly yanked backwards by the collar of your jacket, the color leaving your face once you got a good look at the serious man standing behind you. 

“Possession of illegal drugs and evading the law. That’s enough for a few months in the slammer,” the man said with a smirk, bending over slightly and lifting you up over his shoulder with ease. You squeaked at the feeling of his arms squeezing around your body, hitting your fists into his solid back and yelling at him to let you go. Whistling a bit, he simply carried you back to his taller, older looking partner who was leaning against the police car with his arms folded across his chest. 

“What do we have here?” Yunho mused, a mysterious glint hidden within his coffee brown eyes. 

Once Jongho placed you down onto the ground, you tried to take off, instantly being yanked backwards by the taller man and shoved down face-first onto the hood of the police car. “Trying to run again, huh? Seems like we have a little troublemaker on our hands.”

“Fuck you,” you replied with your cheek smushed into the cold metal of the hood, groaning from how rough Yunho was as he grabbed your wrists and forced them behind your back in an uncomfortable position. 

“She’s feisty,” Yunho commented to his partner, the two of them exchanging pleased glances with each other, just as you heard a click sound and the sensation of something cold and heavy hanging on your wrists. You were fucked. Completely and utterly fucked. So why were you elated? “You have the right to remain silent, pretty girl. Everything you say can and will…” his voice trailed off a bit, focusing on pressing himself against your ass, sighing at the sensation. “…be held against you.” 

“And you have the right to choke on a dick,” you retorted, squeezing your thighs together, both disgusted and turned on knowing that you could feel just how large the man was in every sense of the word. 

“She wants me,” Yunho stated, grinning at his friend. Jongho playfully shook his head at Yunho, who chuckled and stepped aside. 

Your fingers twitched behind you, biting down on your lip in anticipation for what was next until you began to feel strong hands sliding up and down your thighs, then to your ass, his fingers squeezing into them and spreading you apart through your thin joggers, making your brain feel a bit fuzzy around the edges. “Wh-what do you think you’re doing?” you questioned weakly, lifting your head up to look back at Jongho with a glare. 

“It’s called a body search, sweetheart.” Jongho continued, moving his hands up your waist, going in a slow, deliberate manner, like he was trying to memorize how your body felt inside his hands. Once he got to your chest, he kneaded and squeezed your tits, able to pinch your nipples through your thin tank top, drawing a stilted moan from your lips. 

“Y-you’re a fucking pervert,” you scowled, squirming around, Jongho’s hands continuing to grope at your tits until he pulled the wad of bills out of your top. Before you could protest, Yunho grabbed a section of your hair and lifted your head up to make you look at him, causing you to whimper. 

“You’re the little pervert here, princess. Moaning and squirming around during a simple search. I bet you’re wet too.” 

“Sh-shut up…” you mumbled, your cheeks hot to the touch, comforted by the cold metal of the hood when the man let go of your hair. 

“Uh-huh.” Yunho lowered his hand to your ass and grabbed it roughly, before sliding his hand in between your thighs, rubbing at the underside of your clothed cunt, pressing his digits down where he presumed your clit was. “Is this where you keep your drugs? In this little pussy of yours?” 

You didn’t know what the hell was going on, but you almost didn’t want it to stop. You knew Night City was going to shit, but were these two assholes really allowed to be a part of the force with the way they were acting? Well, anything was possible. “Show me your badges,” you suddenly commanded, only for you to get flipped onto your backside, looking up at the two men who were staring down at you with hungry eyes. “Prove that you’re real cops.” 

Yunho laughed a bit to himself, nudging Jongho out of habit. Jongho gave him a gummy smile, looking sweeter than he should have. His face sharpened when he looked down at you, his tongue poking into his cheek, casually holding what appeared to be a police badge in front of your face, which confused you even more. If he hadn’t just groped you and taken your hard earned money, you would’ve believed that he could listen to reason, unlike the psychopath that stood there gripping the outline of his unreasonably large package. “You want proof, huh, little slut? I got my baton right here.”

You looked as bored as you possibly could, tilting your head, responding with a simple, “Is that it?” The man didn’t appreciate that very much, simply yanking you up from the hood of the car and shoving you into the backseat before accompanying you. 

“I know you want to keep acting like a stubborn little brat, but I know you want this just as much as we do,” Yunho said into your ear, nibbling on your earlobe with his teeth, sending a shiver through you. “I bet you’re soaking wet. Don’t you think, Jjong? Our little plaything is probably gushing for us, huh?” 

Putting the car in drive using the stick shift, Jongho pulled out onto the street, eyeing you through the rearview mirror, the corner of his lips lifting upwards. “Wouldn’t hurt to check.”

Yunho slipped his hand past your joggers, cupping your bare pussy and hearing the audible squelching sounds of your abundant arousal. You were a mess. Is this what Night City turned you into? Someone who was willing to be used by two unhinged strangers? You didn’t like the answer, but at this point, you were too invested to care. “Fuck me, you’re even wetter than I thought. We got a little whore on our hands, Jjong.” 

“Are you gonna do something about it, or what?” you challenged Yunho, your heart ready to burst out of your chest due to the rush of adrenaline flooding your brain. 

On the drive back to what you assumed was their residence, Yunho and Jongho both appreciated your encouragement, resulting in your joggers being pulled down past your knees and your dripping cunt being pounded by two of the “officer’s” sizable fingers.  

As Jongho turned the leather steering wheel to the right to make a turn at an empty intersection, he cleared his throat, gaining the attention of his partner in crime. “Add a third finger, Yun. Stretch her out for me.” 

“On it.” Yunho didn’t even bother hiding his giddiness, chuckling to himself, before pursing his lips to drip some saliva down onto his fingers. Being finger-fucked by him was almost the equivalent to having a cock inside you, especially if he filled you with three. He had a habit of breaking his toys too quickly, so he decided he would take his time preparing you for the real thing. 

“I’m really starting to think that the two of you aren’t real cops,” you chimed sarcastically, finally having calmed down a bit, eyeing Jongho through the rearview mirror, who gave you a cheeky wink, before glaring over at Yunho, instantly annoyed by the smirk that his pretty lips twisted into. 

“What makes you say that, princess?” the man asked aloofly, slipping a third equally long, equally thick finger into your tight entrance and stretching it open, leaving with you a pleasant burning sensation. 

“You’re literally knuckles deep in me right now, asshole!” you spat in his direction, resulting in a quick, though rough slap to your cheek, a stinging imprint of Yunho’s large hand still left on your face. It made you leak, aiding him in his quest to make you fall apart. 

“Is that any way to speak to an officer of the law?” Reveling in your clear shock and the influx of arousal slipping past his thrusting fingers, Yunho shook his head. “Oh, you dumb little girl. I’m obviously doing a routine cavity search. Checking for drugs and such.” He began to curl his digits and rub at the little spongy area that made your eyes roll back, noticing how you started to clench around him. “Though I don’t think you can fit anything into this tiny pussy of yours, but you’re more than welcome to try with my cock.” 

“A-as if I’d want your disgusting cock anywhere near me. You’re only getting away with this because I’m fucking handcuffed!” you grunted out, trying to bite back the moans you so desperately wanted to let out, the fire in your belly about to erupt into something that you couldn’t even try to tame. “I’d be choking the fuck out of you if I could use my hands.” 

Yunho opened his mouth and dragged his tongue across his top set of teeth, the silver finishing of what seemed to be a bottom set of grillz glimmering in the light. “Kinky. I’d like that.” 

You couldn’t tell if you wanted to spit on him or kiss him, so you simply looked on, finding Jongho’s eyes routinely locking with yours when he didn���t have to immediately focus on the road. He had hardly spoken a word to you and yet you found yourself pulsing around Yunho’s thick fingers just from having him stare you down. You were getting close and you couldn’t quite hide it anymore, your eyebrows starting to move upwards, mouth beginning to hang open, and your moans coming out embarrassingly high pitched in response to the pads of Yunho’s fingers rubbing at your g-spot. 

Jongho chuckled to himself, licking at the corner of his lips. “Are you going to fall apart for him, doll?” You could see his arm shift a bit and the side of his forearm coming in and out of view from where you were sitting. “Are you going to–fuck–cum all over his fingers?” He was starting to sound out of breath. The motherfucker was jerking himself off and driving at the same time. To be quite honest, you were more disappointed that you couldn’t watch than the fact that he was risking all of your lives on the freeway. Maybe you were just like them. Just maybe. 

Yunho pressed his lips onto the shell of your ear, feeling you routinely squeezing around him. He needed to send you over the edge. “Cum for me, pretty girl. You know you want to.” You pulsed around him, giving him a good idea of what you wanted to hear next. Sending his tongue up along your earlobe and biting it roughly, making you shudder, he growled, “Be a good girl for me and fucking cum.” 

A ragged cry escaped your dry throat as Yunho shoved his fingers inside you one last time, keeping them there, your arousal pouring out of you, getting all over his veiny forearm and the leather seat below. Once you recovered, you cleared your throat and blew a bit of hair out of your eyes, side-eyeing Yunho. “This is the only way you get girls to fuck you, huh? By handcuffing them and putting them in the back of your car?” 

Yunho felt a surge of anger shoot through him, but it went straight to his cock. “Fuck, you really do like being a little brat for us, don’t you? Because you like how we put you in your place, huh, baby?” Yunho ran a ringed finger through your hair and pushed a few locks of it behind your ear, his dark eyes studying your flushed face with an intensity that made you throb. 

“We’re here,” Jongho interjected, pressing a button on a small remote he had in his hand, the sliding metal garage door in front of the car slowly rising up, revealing a spacious garage complete with a secondhand sofa, a TV, a large toolbox, and randomly assorted car parts wrapped in bubble-wrap lying on the floor in the corner. 

You disregarded their set up, not needing to ask to know that they were probably up to some shady shit. It didn’t matter, anyway. You did what you had to do as well to keep up with the city that was both decaying and upgrading itself at the same time. 

Once Yunho pulled you out of the backseat, you motioned your head to your restraints. “Can you take these off now that you’re done with your little show? If we’re going to fuck, I don’t need my arms to be going numb.” 

He chuckled, sending Jongho a quick, pleased glance as his friend took a step behind you and put the tiny key into the slot to unclasp the handcuffs, not letting you go before he reached around you, pulling your jacket off, leaving you in just a thin tank top. Jongho noticed the sound of two vials clinking together, feeling through the jacket and slipping his fingers inside the secret compartment. 

“Go on and get comfortable, sweetheart,” Yunho chimed, nodding his head up at you, watching you with dark eyes as you sat down in the middle of the couch, one leg crossed over the other. 

Jongho stood next to him, handing him one of the vials. “Is this the stuff she’s selling?” Yunho mumbled, holding it up in the light, eyeing the chemical blue liquid sloshing around inside. “Night Serum, huh? What’s a pretty girl like you doing selling something like this, anyways?” 

You shrugged. “I gotta make a living somehow.” 

He tapped his finger against the glass, watching as a tiny bubble formed inside. “You wanna try it?” 

“I mean, yeah, but are you sure you want to?” you questioned, tilting your head. “One of my regulars told me he downed a vial and fucked a lovebot so hard, its system shut down halfway through.” 

Yunho smirked at Jongho, before pressing his shoulder into yours. “I mean, you’re the one that’s acting as our little lovebot for tonight, so are you prepared for that?” 

Were you? You weren’t too sure of much, to be frank. Just that you wanted to be used and abused by the sleazy pair of fake cops (mechanics?) hovering over you. You simply nodded at him, licking at the corner of your lips. 

“Bottoms up,” Yunho purred into your ear, tilting the glass back and allowing the liquid to drip into his mouth. Before he swallowed it all, he grabbed your chin and forced his mouth onto yours. 

“Mmfff…” you mumbled into his mouth, looking back at him, barely able to handle him shoving his tongue down your throat. The effects were almost instantaneous; your senses and any physical sensations you felt were immediately heightened to the tenth degree. Not only that, but you felt the overwhelming urge to be filthy. You could see why everyone wanted to get their hands on it. 

This discovery almost distracted you from what was going on in front of you. Yunho had grabbed Jongho by the collar, his other hand clutching the back of the younger man’s head, their lips and tongues eagerly entwining, both occasionally biting at each other’s lips. 

Once Yunho sucked on Jongho’s tongue and swallowed down some of their combined spit, he pulled back slightly, their now swollen lips barely touching, the both of them breathing in the same air, sending pleasant zaps of arousal below the belt. “What do you want to do next, Jjong? Tell me.” 

Almost breathless, Jongho cleared his throat, a faint blush on his cheeks. “I want to eat her out,” he mumbled, looking past Yunho and making eye contact with you. “I want her to squirt for me, Yun.”

Yunho smirked, running his thumb across the younger man’s glistening bottom lip. “Mm, you want our pretty little toy to make a mess, huh?” 

Jongho nodded, smiling softly. “A big mess, yeah.” 

-

With your thighs being held open forcefully by two strong hands, you squirmed around inside Yunho’s lap, barely able to handle the visual of Jongho ravaging your swollen cunt, his nose grinding repeatedly against your clit, his tongue buried deep inside your hole, and his dilated eyes focused solely on yours. 

“Stay still, kitten,” Yunho purred, gripping the undersides of your thighs and bringing them upwards so that your knees were up by your chest on either side. “Let my pretty boy take care of you.” 

Jongho groaned softly at his friend’s sentence, his hand closing tightly around his cock, fisting it with diligence. He plunged his tongue in and out of you, only stopping to purse his lips and let the mix of arousal and spit drip down onto your clit. Eyeing the wetness longingly, he smacked his hand down onto you, sending a bolt of pleasure through your body,before going back down to slurp all the escaping arousal back into his mouth. 

“Don’t swallow, Jjong.” Yunho reached around your shoulder to clutch your jaw, forcing it open, your tongue lolling out of your mouth. “Let her taste.” 

Jongho slowly stood up and hovered over the both of you, sending the mixture of fluids into your open mouth, replacing Yunho’s hand on your jaw to shut it. 

Just as you were about to swallow it down, Yunho growled, “Hold it,” near your ear, smiling slightly at the small, obedient nod you gave him. He grabbed Jongho by the chin and pulled him in for a kiss that mostly consisted of teeth and tongue, tasting you on him. The two men grunted and groaned, their hands automatically reaching for each other’s cocks, haphazardly stroking them until they were dripping more and more pre-cum by the second.

“Mmmn,” you mumbled with your mouth full, your back warm against Yunho’s heated chest, your pussy throbbing with urgency the longer you watched them pleasure one another. 

Yunho rubbed his thumb over Jongho’s slit, making him gasp and pull away due to how sensitive he was, a few strings of saliva still joining their lips. “Cute.” He chuckled, almost forgetting you were there until he saw the way you were begging for his attention with your eyes. “Aww, poor baby. Here’s your reward for waiting.” He tilted your face towards his and sent a wad of spit down your throat, making you moan and pulse heavily around Jongho’s tongue once he had returned to the space he took up between your thighs. “Good, now spit it out onto your cute little cunt like a good whore.” 

Biting your lip, you angled your head down and sent the warm liquid down onto yourself in globs, feeling it spread out over your clit and drip down your puffy folds. 

“Good girl,” Yunho praised, reaching down to rub the rough pad of his thumb back and forth over your clit at a rapid speed. He pressed kisses onto your neck, licking and biting at it, enjoying the myriad of moans and whines you let out the closer you got to your release. 

It only took one forceful squeeze of your clit and the feeling of being stretched open by Jongho’s large tongue for you to cum so hard you saw stars. When you came to, Jongho was licking your squirt from his chin, his eyes hooded and hair completely soaked in your release. 

Yunho cupped your cunt and palmed it just to feel your body begin to shudder against his from the overstimulation, smiling fondly at the sight of Jongho’s rampant lust. “Did you like being squirted on, baby bear?” 

He nodded with enthusiasm, standing up to show Yunho his softened length that was covered in his own release, smiling cheekily. “Very much so.” 

“Mm, that’s what I like to see,” Yunho nodded approvingly, his fingers idly slipping into your soaked hole and scissoring his fingers apart. Moaning, you pressed your head back against one of his broad shoulders. He placed his lips onto your cheek near your jaw, humming against your hot skin. “Ready to take my cock, sugar?” 

-

Laying on the couch with your legs spread open, you suddenly stiffened up when you felt Yunho’s cockhead press against your entrance, his large hands gripping onto your hips. You looked down at his condom-less cock, asking, “And what do you think you’re doing?” 

“Aww, come on, princess,” he purred, grabbing one of your ass cheeks and kneading it around. “You’ll let me hit it raw, won’t you? Don’t you want to feel my big cock rubbing against your pretty little cunt?” Sensing Jongho’s presence near him, Yunho moved out of the way and spread your pussy open, watching as Jongho sent a wad of spit directly onto your slit.

You were practically melting in Yunho’s grasp from hearing his filthy words said in such a patronizingly sweet tone and feeling Jongho’s spit drip down your heat, barely able to handle his intense gaze. Yunho tapped your cheek with two fingers. “Tell Jjong that you want it. That you want to feel me pump you full of my cum.” He took a second to let out a pleased sigh, his cock throbbing inside his grasp. “Tell him that you like that he’s going to watch me use you before he gets a turn.” 

“I-i want it,” you murmured with a pout, your eyes solely focused on Jongho. “I w-want to feel Yunho’s cum inside me…and…” You were both so fixated on each other that you didn’t even notice when Yunho slapped his cock down onto your lower abdomen, pre cum smearing across your skin. 

“Finish the sentence, doll,” Jongho requested, his soft, though commanding voice sending a shiver up your spine. 

Your eyelids lowered, feeling yourself begin to pulse in between your thighs. “You’re going to watch me while I get used by Yunho before you get a turn with me.” After hearing Jongho’s small groan and seeing the lust take over his features, you unconsciously spread yourself further open like you were about to take him instead of Yunho, which they both greatly appreciated. 

Yunho suddenly slapped his length down onto your abdomen, lining it up so that you all could see just how far he would reach inside you. The tip of his cock reached just above your belly button. You whimpered, feeling dizzy at the sight of it, wondering how something so big was going to fit. Yunho, however, was having the time of his life. “Oh my god, I’m going to rearrange your fucking guts,” Yunho groaned huskily, sliding his cock back and forth across your clit, using your combined arousal to stimulate the both of you. Enjoying the sounds of your small, breathless moans, he smacked his cock down onto your clit, making you let out a sudden gasp. 

“G-go slow, okay?” your voice not coming out as commanding as you wanted it to, your eyebrows furrowed, despite giving the two men a pout. “I don’t want to be split in half.” 

Yunho could’ve cum right then and there, too delighted with your acknowledgement of your clear size difference.

Noticing his friend zoning out, Jongho wiped some of the drool that was starting to escape Yunho’s lips. “What’s on your mind, Yun?” 

Yunho smiled gleefully at Jongho. “I’m going to break her, aren’t I?” 

Jongho shook his head, returning the same glazed over look that Yunho was giving him. “We’re going to break her.” 

-

You couldn’t quite remember how you got here — getting pounded into next week by some pervert with grillz and a silver chain hanging in your face, letting him use you to his heart’s content, while his partner simply watched on, steadily fisting his cock with unwavering enthusiasm. You never would’ve guessed that you’d be getting your brains fucked out in some random criminal's rundown garage that night, instead of just heading back to your apartment downtown. 

“Jjong, she’s zoning out again,” Yunho spoke up in between grunts, letting go on one of your spread thighs to rake his fingers through his sweaty hair. “What should I do?” 

Repositioning himself on the couch beside you, Jongho grasped your chin and tilted it upwards. “Give her a little smack.” 

Smirking, Yunho backhanded you, just hard enough to bring you back to reality, immediately allowing you to feel the immense pressure of the man’s hips rocking into yours, his cock plugging you up over and over. “Fuck, if you’re going to smack me, then at least aim for my p–”

Yunho’s large hand slammed down onto your cunt, his calloused palm rubbing against your swollen clit, replacing your words with a choked moan and bringing a smile to his sweaty face. 

“Again,” you said, your demand coming out as a plea instead, your legs starting to tremble against the slippery couch. “Do it again.” 

“Who knew such a feisty little thing would become such a needy slut for us?” he asked his friend, who shrugged his shoulders. Yunho removed his hand from your pulsing cunt, instead lifting your hips up and slamming into you at a deeper angle, making you let out a yell of pleasure.  “Would you like to do the honors and help make our new little toy cum all over my cock, Jjong?” 

Jongho immediately brought his hand down and slapped it directly onto your clit, not giving you a second to react, before he did it again, both him and Yunho watching with delight as your arousal began to squirt out of you like a small fountain. "Good girl," he sighed, sliding his fingers through the wetness and spreading it over your swollen clit.  

You looked to Jongho for a moment, your cheeks burning from the way he was gazing down at you with his pulsing cock in his hand, but Yunho's grip on your jaw brought your attention back to the cock that was currently drilling into your spasming cunt. "P-please cum," was all you could verbalize, a line of drool escaping past your lips.

Yunho continued to fuck you through the overstimulation, leaving your inner walls slick and warm with the heavy amounts of pre-cum that were spilling out of his cock. “Mm, that’s right. I bet a slut like you wants to feel every drop of my load when it spills into your womb. Don’t you? You want to know the exact moment that you get pregnant for me, huh?” 

You let out a long, drawn-out moan, gripping the edge of the couch, chipping off some of the faux leather material from the cushion with your nails. “I’ll…nnngh…kill you if you get me pregnant…” 

“What, you don’t like the idea of someone like me pumping you full of my kids?” he asked near your ear, his body pressing heavily against you, smacking his hand into your ass so harshly, he left a lasting handprint. 

“N-no, dumbass,” you choked out, throwing your head back into the couch cushion once Yunho persistently bucked his hips into you, sloppily and without nuance, like you were just a sex doll he had just purchased from Night City’s local rundown sex shop. 

Yunho scoffed, shaking his head, his raven locks starting to stick to his forehead. “Then why are you throbbing around my cock, pretty girl? Why are you about to cum all over it?” He bit his bottom lip, pulling all the way out and shoving himself back into you, your combined arousal making a filthy squelching sound. “You want it so bad, you’ll let Jongho fill you up too, won’t you?” 

“Fuck, just fill me up, please, both of you,” you finally admitted, your voice barely coming out, the way Yunho picking up his speed and slamming himself repeatedly into your sopping wet cunt sending you into another state of euphoria.

“I'm gonna fill you up, baby. Oh, fuck, here it comes,” the man grunted in between thrusts, letting out a series of low, gutteral sounds, holding his hand down on the bulge in your lower abdomen, cum shooting out of his cock in long spurts, coating your walls with white. It felt so good, you almost lost it, whimpering and whining. “Yeah, you fucking like that, don’t you? You like how big I feel inside you? Like I'm gonna split you open, huh?” You simply nodded, unable to think, let alone speak. Chuckling smugly, Yunho pulled out, fisting his cock until a few more dribbles of cum leaked out of him and dripped down your mound. 

Before you could ever take a breath, you were suddenly being lifted up by Yunho and being set down onto Jongho’s lap. “Ready, doll?” the younger man asked, running his calloused hands up along your curves, squeezing at the softest parts of your body, his fingers settling on your tits and tweaking them.

“Yes, sir,” you moaned softly, your words flipping a switch inside Jongho’s mind. 

Jongho picked your hips up and lowered you down onto his thick length, slowly pushing the entirety of it inside, his hips already moving like it was second nature to him, efficiently fucking Yunho’s cum back into you, some of the milkiness dribbling down to the younger man’s heavy balls. “Feels good?” 

“Really good.” You panted, wrapping your arms around his neck, holding onto him. “So good. More, please.” 

When Yunho nudged his neck and jawline with his lips, whispering something into his pierced ear, his tongue eventually sliding across his heated skin, Jongho leaned his head back, inviting it. He kept one hand on your hip, the other moving to stroke his friend’s cock. “If you want more, you’ll have to work for it,” Jongho stated, smiling lazily at you, his hand moving down to squeeze your ass. “Ride me, baby. Make it bounce.” 

Feeling desperate, you obliged him, gripping his broad shoulders tightly, his muscles tightening underneath your grip, lifting yourself up, only to drop yourself down onto him, his groans of approval urging you to go as fast as you could. “I’m riding you, sir, just how you want, so please give me your cum. I need it.” 

Yunho sucked and licked at Jongho’s neck as he nodded weakly, finding his softer moans to be a lot cuter than the deeper, more masculine sounds he tried to make. “She’s our little cumslut now, baby bear. Fill her up with your honey, okay?” Jongho’s hand tightened around the older man’s length, squeezing out more clear liquid and using it as lube, drawing muffled groans from Yunho. 

Determined to take the strangers’ loads one after another, you bounced on Jongho’s cock with fierce determination, his cum-covered length stretching you open over and over, effectively setting your insides ablaze. “Please,” was all you could whimper out, wiping some sweat from your forehead, looking between Jongho and Yunho, hoping to bring attention to your desperate situation. 

Yunho pressed his lips onto Jongho’s earlobe, mouthing something into it, both of their hands eventually traveling to your pulsing clit, taking turns thumbing it eagerly and rolling it around. “Cum for us, sugar.”

Drawing short, airy moans out of Yunho with his skilled hand movements, Jongho smiled softly at him, then looked at you, his fingers roughly squeezing your clit, as he studied your pleasure-struck face, chiming in, “Make a mess.” 

Letting out a ragged cry and blacking out for a moment, you came undone, the sensation of warm creaminess spurting into you bringing you back to reality, your head spinning from the feeling, as well as the sight of Yunho shuddering and covering his chest in his own mess. “Fuck….” you exhaled, leaning forward into Jongho’s arms, who wrapped them securely around you, all your strength suddenly leaving your tired body. The drug was starting to wear off, and you were left accepting the decisions you made, some of it dripping out of your cum-filled cunt. 

-

“The comedown from Night Serum is really rough, you know,” you sighed, sliding your fingers through your damp hair and leaning your head back into the couch cushion, puffing on the cigarette that sat between your lips. “Hot flashes, the shakes, cottonmouth, fever, the list goes on.” 

“I guess we gotta keep busy, huh? Maybe I’ll just fuck the fever out of you since you love to take cock so much,” Yunho replied smugly with a short, brusque laugh, buckling his belt and nudging Jongho with his elbow as if he was asking him to laugh along with him. Jongho gave him a small exhale of air, barely a chuckle. A pity laugh, if you will. 

“Uh-huh, right.” You tilted your head to the side, batting your eyelashes up at Yunho. “You’re lucky I didn’t give you head. I would’ve given your cock a little chomp if I had the chance.” 

Yunho flashed you a wide grin, his silver grillz reflecting in the light. “Well, there’s always next time.” 

Not that you didn’t know before, but Yunho had to be a psycho. You weren’t quite sure about Jongho yet, but there was always time for him to surprise you. Were you actually considering sticking around these two after everything they did? Arresting you, manhandling you, fucking you within an inch of your life — were you really capable of handling that for god knows how long? 

You sat up, flicking the cigarette stump away onto the dirty ground and smiling over at Jongho, who quietly observed you with the same pleased expression he had the entirety of the night, before gazing up at Yunho, your eyes full of determination, fire, and maybe a glimpse of insanity. “I’m looking forward to it, Yunnie.” He took a small step back, caught a bit off guard, letting out a nervous chuckle. You suddenly stood up and bit down onto your bottom set of teeth, making Yunho stumble back into the cop car and slide down the smooth metal until he landed on his ass, resulting in a hearty laugh from Jongho. 

Yunho appeared to be shocked, until his pretty lips twisted into a mischievous smile, his eyes upturned with satisfaction. “The others are gonna like you.” 

“O-others?” you squeaked, feeling Jongho settle a strong hand down on your shoulder and pat it, as if he was already apologizing for what was about to come. 

➽───────────────❥

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© kitten4sannie, 2023.

[caraphernellie]

can u write ellie with dacryphillia

info: ok so... you know me. biggest softdom ellie truther. at least for jackson ellie. now i raise you: softdom ellie who has a gf in a bratty mood and she's starting to get annoyed by letting you have your way too often... so she basically jackhammers u until u get the point! she's in charge here <3

“kay, faster now.”

ellie’s order falls on deaf ears for the millionth time and she’s starting to reach a limit. she has been for some time now. she’s too soft, and who could blame her? her brain turns to mush the minute she’s got you this way.

dazzling green eyes focusing in on the way your body moves, the rippling of skin and contortions of your belly. her hands find home on the spaces between your ribs and your hips, thumbs rubbing circles as you bounce on her strap.

“hey,” ellie tries her best with you, putting on a stern tone now, and her hand weakly slaps one of your tits. she bites back a smirk of pride at your jolt. “do you hear me?”

you definitely do. but hearing isn’t the same as listening or even caring. not when the rhythmic circles your hips are moving in are scratching that itch so good. it’s satisfying the pit of warm need in your stomach that’s been waiting all day. the pit you begged and begged ellie to help you out with.

it’s how you ended up here, ellie still half dressed in her grey pullover and you on her lap with nothing but an unzipped hoodie on.

“aww, i thought you said you were desperate, baby,” ellie continues, “what’s this?”

a shiver runs down your spine, ellie’s hand moving over the expanse of skin on your stomach and squeezing your tit. she’s on two trains of thought, distracted by the way the soft ball of flesh fits in her hand, and trying to keep you in line. because what ellie can feel is her power slipping out of her grip no matter how hard she squeezes your body under her palms. 

“so you’re not even gonna talk to me?”

a fire ignites in ellie when you move slower, rolling your hips down onto her cock, the depth eliciting a drawn out and long moan from you.

“god, can you not be fuckin’ stupid for two seconds?” ellie asks, never genuine when she gets like this albeit it’s a rare occurrence for sure. she starts to buck her hips upward, fucking into you while forcing you to change your pace – her hands grip meaty thighs and begin bouncing you up and down. she revels in the way you mewl a little louder, the sight of your tits bouncing.

“like this. don’t let me tell you twice, baby. i mean it.” voice strained from the effort of her movements, ellie grunts and finally releases you. “you said you were desperate, so we’re making this quick, and i don’t wanna hear any complaints.”

i’m too nice to you sometimes, ellie thinks to herself. but she believes it pays off. she lives for the control, but she’s a more gentle lover. normally it’s enough to get you to listen just like it has right now, with you continuing at the pace she set. she watches with a satisfied smirk, her thumb reaching down languidly to flick at your clit.

“there she is, good girl.”

sometimes (most of the time), ellie gives in. she lets you do as you please. she never gets to hear you beg because she’s so weak for you, so eager to make her girl feel good, that she will give you exactly what you need when you ask. she will give up on trying to reign you in and do what she wants you to, only because the sight you are is already so convincing that ellie doesn’t mind. anything to see it, the furrow in your brows, your eyes rolling back. anything to see a happy, fucked out expression on your face.

so it’s no surprise ellie’s seeing a rise in bratty behaviour, she enables it. she shouldn’t complain, but she will anyway. it’s her fault and damn, she needs to do something about it before it gets worse. she’s had a busy week and doesn’t need this. because ellie hates her authority to be challenged by one of the only people she even has authority over. 

the fade of ellie’s smirk comes with the fade of speed. she hears the sweetest giggle escape your lips and she knows you’re treating this like some kind of joke now and she can’t have that. 

“we’re not doing this again, babe.” ellie’s voice is a low rasp by this point, the slightest bit of amusement present. what you expect might be another spank to the thigh before she inevitably gives in to you, but that’s not what comes your way.

this time it’s ellie chuckling. you yelp loudly as she flips you onto your back. she’s on top now, wasting no time, and she slides into you again.

everything happens too fast for you to fully process it, but she’s pounding into you now. the sounds of skin slapping, the squelching of ellie’s thrusts into your poor cunt, and your nonstop moans – it’s filthy. ellie can’t stop it now, grunts of effort made as she hooks your legs around her waist. if she didn’t know any better, she’d make some point about being able to see her cock poking and bulging out of your tummy, her thrusts deep and carnal.

hands balling the sleeves of your jacket into paws, you hide behind them, finding this to be one of the most intimate and closest experiences you’ve had. ellie’s caging your head between her arms, lip drawn between her teeth, eyes piercing down at you. she takes grip of your wrists and pins them down, laughing at you. “yeah, look at me, baby. look… who’s making you feel this good? who owns you?”

your eyes grow half-lidded and ellie’s face becomes a blur, tears clouding your vision whilst all you can do is halfheartedly moan her name in response. 

“poor baby,” ellie mocks, her voice a hoarse coo, as soft as she can manage. it’s a harsh comparison to the reckless power of her hips. as long as you will sing your pleasure to her, she won’t stop. “i thought you wanted it so bad, you wanted my dick so bad, so what’s your deal?”

“mm… n- noth–” you try, you try to speak, but things are getting fuzzy. there’s nothing to occupy your busy mind besides her. ellie, ellie, ellie.

you’re brought out of the fuzziness for a moment when ellie cups your face to wipe a tear off your cheek.

“you just needed me to do all the work for you, huh? so you can lay there cryin’ ‘cuz it just feels that good to get fucked like this?”

all you do is nod, pitiful moans and whimpers flooding ellie’s senses, egging her on just as much as the sight of her strap covered in your essence does.

“i try so hard to be nice to you, baby, feels like you just–” ellie takes one particularly hard thrust into your sopping cunt, “--take advantage of that like a slut…”

“m’sorry,” you squeak, hands wrapping around her shoulders, pulling her closer, closer, closer, nails digging into her back and eliciting a hiss. she’s getting sloppier now, tired and finding that the base of the strap is pressing too well into her clit, making her near delirious, like it’s her real dick she’s fucking you with.

“who’s in charge?” ellie demands to know, glaring down at you but with no malice, there’s nothing but lust and amazement as hot tears streak your cheeks. “who are you gonna obey next time?”

“you.”

“who?”

“ellie, ellie, ellie ellie ellie.”

“that’s right,” ellie scoffs with a nod. “good girl.”

[ranvame]

one year older

everything became so clear to make us believe that life was short, last time i was a girl who love to enjoy my moms food living a beautiful laugh for my dad, loving sisters and brother and for many dearest friend, now im more older to face my life

i want to thankful that i can feel how life till now cus many people outside there didn't get a chance to achive what they want have to be, well that was something that we have to grateful for, something smash for yourself to getting better day by day

im so grateful that i can see clear, i can hear msny songs, i can taste spicy, i can smell so good, i can feel, i can dance, i can walk, i can eat, everythings the little things become so valuable for you who become older

we never know what were going to face even tomorrow, in hours, minutes, or even second. So we never know are you going to left this damn world tomorrow or even just in a minute left. It is what it is what something that will be happen it will happen, im just enjoying my life as myself in this world there's so many things that i want to say to myself that u already work hard for this body and soul.

for my mom and my dad, you are more than everything in this world i can't aside a love that i feel when i was around you. I can't imagine that day will come to me when u have to let me grow as a human body when i was alone in this space and you just left me, im always hope that u will be get healthier more day by day. Because when i lost you, everything even the little things part of me never gonna be the same

For my sisters and brothers just fucked up, i dont care are u gonna feel what i fell you guys just a bunch of a selfish human that i ever seen, but aside of that im thankful for a moment and the lessons that i've got. I hope you guys can live a life that u wanted and enjoy for that

for my friends especially for ayu nadya and nisya, i met ayu and nadya when i was in high school and nisya in college. I love them sm im just love them and i cannot describe what meaning love of friendship, i just can say i really cannot let them go and i dont want to lose them really and so bad, like you already put your little hope into someone so you dont want to lose that hope

and for me, i know you were tired , you always trying to be perfect, to get a chance, to get everything that u want. If i can say something to my little me i said "i hope there's a time machine i want to go back in the moment that i dont have to think about many things"

It's so clear to me to see when u became older, everything moment in the past that you think before gonna be the moment that you can feel in the future and its like a circle just like people said "you're gonna feel what ifeel " like when i was junior i was to think to be in high school, and when i was in high school i use think how is it fell in college and next on it just a like circle life till u die

aside of that, important to me to feel what i feel rn. If i said that im okay than im not trully okay. Something that i really hate from myself when i have to aside the feeling when i want to tell how is it so hard so bad just because you scared of people that will be compared the hard moment that you've been through between them. so what you gonna do? well im just being shut down and yeah just let it

But more that you being shut up you feel that you save the toxic traits in your heart day byday became like a cell of cancer its broken and its spreading to the other cell and you died

So after all for now im trying my best to giving the best for myself i put myself become my top priority, i have to do something that will be the right way for my life. Im trying to aside the holes that im going to fall, i dont know if that going to be that deep if i fall, i have to wake up and im gonna trying hard again and again to reach the top no matter how much i fall again and again.

cause your life was short all you have to do in this world you cannot stay away from your god if you always stay on the way then you're gonna feel that world is a little hard things that you have to face

happy birthday bila, there's so many things that i have to say to you, but i think you already know it dept of my heart

you're the cutest girl that i ever seen and gonna be always, you precious than just a words

love from me now you have to forget your teenage moment bye bye and say hi to your real life

[aeriris]

Crush on another idol! | 4town part ONE.

DESC. Ur a famous idol, and 4town has a crush on u 🫶🏽! Hcs + a small scenario!! In Robaire, Aaron t’s, and Taeyoung’s you are a soloist. In Jesse and Aaron z’s you are also in a group! Jesse and Tae are in part two !

ROBAIRE

.♡ robaire saw you when he was scrolling through tiktok, he saw an edit of you and was like “who’s this SCRUMPTIOUS person?”

.♡ so he decided to do a little research on you…. Yeah that lasted a while

.♡ after a few days of just learning who you are, he unintentionally became a big fan of you

.♡ the rest of 4town found out when he was listening to ur songs and just FANBOYING

.♡ t called him a simp and he got beat up /j

.♡ when he was listening to ur songs, Tae was like “oh (y/n)! That’s my friend!” And robaire IMMEDIATELY grabs Tae and shakes him like “introduce me. Now.”

.♡ the type to like edits and pictures of you (and secretly own a Stan account…)

.♡ if you ever acknowledged him he would die on the spot no joke

✧ROBAIRE starts getting nervous once he sees you being sat down before the award show, now, it’s not like he didn’t want you there. The problem is, your table is right next to his. Your table is right next to his and you look too good to not be looked at.

Another group is about to preform and while your focused on them, all he can focus on is you. He swears whenever he looks at you the room turns pink and sparkles shine bright around you and- dear god what the fuck is happening to him???

“Ooooo robaire is looking at them and he’s looking hard!” Aaron t said in a teasing tone, his voice was a little too loud for robaires liking “shut up! What if they hear!” He snaps back. While the two jokingly argue you look at them since they were causing a little bit of a scene next to you

“Robaire DONT look but y/n’s looking at you and they look a little concerned” Tae whispers “oh shit.” Robaire slowly turns to face you, as you two make eye contact he awkwardly smiles, and when you giggled back he swore he died inside that night

AARON T

.♡ Aaron t heard about you before you even debuted with you’re first song, you were the talk of the internet right now

.♡ one day he just hopped online and boom #y/n’sreallyhot is the number one thing trending on Twitter??

.♡ and t, being nosy, clicked on the hashtag and damn now he understands why you were number one trending. You’re really hot

.♡ he kept up with updates about you (surprisingly, the rest of 4town were also interested in you! But nobody was a bigger fan than t)

.♡ and I’m serious when i say nobody was a bigger fan than him. He does not shut up about you

✧“Guys! Y/n’s first song just came out!” Tae shouts from the living room, and as soon as Tae blinks he opens his eyes and AARON T is right in his face “WHATTHEFU-“ “PUT ON THE SONG NOW” t shouts at Tae and Tae is damn near having a heart attack with the way t popped up out of nowhere

“Ayo chill out- I’ll put it on” Aaron z comes out to resolve the situation that’s going on, he puts on the song and he’s gonna be honest your song is really really good, but t’s screaming like a mad man in the background and it’s concerning everyone in the house

“What-?” Jesse pops out from the hallways, everyone’s sitting there confused and t’s going mental, rolling around on the floor and just……

“….should we call an exorcist???” Robaire asks “yes.” Everyone agrees as t is being possessed by the power of your song.

AARON Z

.♡ now he had actually found you kinda through Jesse

.♡ how this works is, Jesse introduced Aaron to a girl named vae; you and vae are in the same group! Soooooo when vae invited Aaron to come see her filming her music video, he most definitely was not expecting her to be in a group

.♡ not that he’s complaining tho, he saw you and vae talking and he was literally so shocked because DAMN.

.♡ even though Aaron thought you were attractive though, he didn’t make any moves. He wanted to know you

.♡ so best believe he thanked god for vae introducing him to you

✧”AARON!” Vae shouted from across the room, waving at aaron to come towards her.

Looking beside vae, he sees you. And you were really cute. He walks over to vae and looks at both of you, “what’s up?” He asks “I just wanted you to meet y/n! I think you two would get along.” Vae says as she backs away so you and Aaron can look at each other clearly. “Hi…” “hey..” and then a heavy silence follows…. “Damn y’all???? Hello?” Vae interrupts “sorry…” you awkwardly chuckle. After a small moment of quietness you finally speak up “uh, I really like your pin!” You say. “my pin?” He replies confused “your pin! The one on your bag?” Oh. I totally forgot about that. He smiles, “thank you, basketball is one of my favorite sports” “I-I’ve been trying to learn! Though I’m not really good with aim yet” you smile

By now, neither you or Aaron notice how vae’s been long gone. Nor have you two realized that it’s been an hour and you two were just chatting the day away, “alright guys! We need to get ready to film!” Your director shouts “oh wow, it’s been a while huh?“ you say “yeah! It’s fun talking to you” and to be honest Aaron doesn’t think he’s been this happy to talk to someone in a while. “I gotta go! Here’s your pin back by the way” “oh, thanks.” He takes the pin back, looking at it for a little while as you walk away he notices a little note on the back

“Call me and maybe one day you can teach me how to play. Xxx-xxx-xxxx”

Can y’all tell I was running out of ideas for Aaron z

[hiy-breadcheeks]

He's not Sebastian Stan

ok so i was watching THE romanian interview seb did and i had an idea bc of the question "can u have a gf and go to clubs or bars?" and ya kno,,, enjoy??????

2022 © hiy-breadcheeks– don't copy, repost, or translate.

ok, just imagine walking inside a bar with Sebastian as your boyfriend.

and he's just nervous cause what if they recognize him and your relationship gets exposed?

"babe, just have fun! no one'll recognize you! relax and get drunk, old man."

and even if they did, you had a plan

but he didn't know what obviously

"old??? you're one year younger than me???"

"yep, still old." you teased.

what can u say? teasing sebastian stan is your favorite thing to do, next to kissing his face that is.

you drag your old boyfriend to one of the bar islands, taking a seat immediately.

your undercover date was going great so far. both of you had multiple drinks but no one was drunk yet.

"babe, stop fixing your hat! i can't even see your face now."

"you see me everyday."

"i do. and??? not enough"

sebastian was about to lean in for a kiss when a fan walked excitedly towards you.

"shit. i told you so! damn wait shit"

you laughed at your panicking boyfriend before facing the fan approaching. "omg, hi! can i take a picture-"

"hi-"

you cut off sebastian. "hey, girl! i love your hair!"

he threw you a confused look but you just ignored him.

"oh thank you! uhm, can you take a picture of me with him?" she asked excitedly, making you chuckle.

"with him? why? do you know each other?" she sent you a confused look. "uhm, isn't he sebastian stan?"

you put a surprised look on your face and threw your head back. "see? i TOLD you you looked like Sebastian Stan!" you said, hitting his shoulders.

"i- what?"

"yeah! see? even his fans mistake you for him! he looks so much like him, right??" you faced the fan again.

"wait, that's not sebastian stan?? you're not sebastian stan??"

"i- n-no! of course not, heh... i've been told i look a lot like him, though i dont really see the resemblance." he said, giving her a fake smile before taking a sip of his drink.

"oh you do! damn, i really thought you were him! i still can't believe you're not him!" the fan laughed, pocketing her phone.

"god, me too! unfortunately for me though, im not dating sebastian stan. i wish i was." you said playfully rolling your eyes. "instead i got a dollar store version named uhm..carl.. davis. very unlucky."

atp, you were laughing hard because of sebastian's confused and obviously offended look "d-dollar store?! you dare-"

"anyway, do you wanna take a picture with him? you know, prank your friends and tell them you met sebastian stan?"

"o-oh, no no! i'm sorry for ruining your date. by the way, you can totally do a good job if you impersonated him....BYE!" she said, as she turned around and hurried away. "god, that was so fucking embarrassing." you heard her say, making you laugh hysterically.

"baby, what the hell was that about??" he asked, laughing.

"you know, for someone who acts for a living?? your acting is SHIT!" an absolute lie btw

"i- that was the "plan" you told me about?? naming me your ex's name?? and a dollar store version??? you just hurt my feelings–"

you cut him off with a kiss. "oh shut up. i love you."

he didn't kiss back and just stared at you.

"oh come on! you can't say it didn't work because it definitely did."

of course he thought it worked but he's not gonna give you the satisfaction. i mean,, YOU NAMED HIM AFTER YOUR EX????

"no, u named me after your ex and said im a dollar store version of MYSELF??"

and of course he stayed salty about it all night because YOU NAMED HIM AFTER YOUR EX??!2?2!!/$&%?!

ok to be fair, this was funnier in my head lmfao im so sorry 💀