#like bro trusted him (which is big given his trust issues) in an attempt for solidarity only for it to not work out that way
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...no but this would ACTUALLY be both equal parts funny, and sort of insensitive. Funny, as in, Floyd getting a cosmetic surgery to better fit his aesthetic of (sad wet kitten) emo boy is equal parts funny and dramatic. But at the same time, I guess a bit insensitive in the sense where it's a bit of a slap to the face to any troll who DIDN'T get a say in that deformity i.e. trolls (Branch) that have gone grey for extensive periods of time. But honestly, it's kind of the equivalent of people surgically getting their ears pointed so IDK, maybe it's not?
It's just that Floyd gives off Sad Boi Vibes with them ears (and general attitude but I guess given the circumstances of the movie understandable) so it's not a far off guess that he might have gone grey. Maybe he did for like a year or something, but it wasn't long enough to have a deformity, and he eventually just modified his ears? Or maybe he's just a dramatic hoe?
Either way, funny. Might not be for Branch though, if he ever found out, is all I'm saying.
Okay I know people love to headcanon that Floyd went grey but the way I know it was just for character design is killing me I swear, like- look at him he looks like the kind of dude that would modify his ears in Claries.
I totally headcanon that getting your ears modified would totally be like a trend for trolls to have that emo vibe and you can’t change my mind about it
#dreamworks trolls#trolls band together#trolls floyd#trolls branch#brozone#trolls headcanons#trolls meme#trolls comic#floyd forever carrying that secret and hoping to whatever deity trolls worship that branch never finds out his hilarious to me#but fr if the other bros find out they would 100% lord it over his head for the rest of their lives#tho if branch DID somehow find out i feel like he'd feel lied to or betrayed somehow#like bro trusted him (which is big given his trust issues) in an attempt for solidarity only for it to not work out that way#yk cuz floyd never actually go grey?#the angst potential of that is delicious#like obviously it's gonna be minor angst and they'll probably move on from it pretty quickly#but still the mild betrayal?#oof#either way the story goes will be angsty (given that it IS BroZone: these gues are choc FULL of angst) and hilarious
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Thinking a lot about found family today, which led to thinking about RJ and Ben. (Part of my LW's name is a purposeful ref to my own mutually-adoptive older sib, who is currently doing me a huge Big Bro solid) That led to me thinking a lot about other parallels, including some shared characteristics with/reasons I probably find RJ to be a compelling and relatable character. The list of reasons is embarrassingly long frankly? (But so is the list of characteristics not held in common so I guess I'm not a complete narcissist)
Being me, I of course made an actual TVTropes-style list (mostly for reference as a partial list of hc and canon Core Mac Characteristics. A LOT of analysis, particularly at the end, and there is some self-discussion too, so placing under the cut to spare y'all).
-My Brother with 50 Levels in Badass: Absolutely, given my headcanon for Mac and the LW.
-I've Got This: Absurd when paired with the last item, but so goes it. Has a natural aversion to seeking assistance until In Dire Straits. (Thinking of the conversation with Daisy re: gnawed on by ferals during first Med-Tek attempt)
-I Don't Got This: The logical extension of the last one. Capable assistance clearly available? Still tries alone first? Doesn't work? shockedpikachu.jpg
-Good in a Group, Suckish Solo: If I were to analogize my life skillsets to a traditional RP class, I'd basically be a bard. Mac's a sniper. Neither one of us is specced to work outside of a group. (Can we talk about this kid sniper not having a working partner for however long? Yeesh)
-Trust Issues: Self-explanatory. His seem apparent from dialogue, albeit also contradicted by how quickly I seem to get his first affinity dialogue (though that might just be my characters giving off Chaotic Vibes)
-A Lannister Always Pays His Debts: doesn't like owing people? Very much so. There's a reason my SoSu says "fine" and takes the caps back, then promptly reinvests it in weapon upgrades for him and shuts him up by pointing out it's essential for their joint survival
-I Don't Have a Job, Is This How You Get A Job: How am I suddenly in charge of Thing? Because I spoke up about it and then didn't say "no?" I guess I'm now in charge of Thing. (See also 'Accidental Protagonist Syndrome;' 'Lord of the Flies (Averted)')
-Child Leading Children: Obvious, given 'mayor for fucking life.' Relatable content given: me, at age Very Young, ordering around my electrics crew, of age Who is This Kid, and staying in that role until I graduated from college.
-Beat It, Mungo: child who would cut an adult unless treated as a peer. "Look alive, you mopey motherfucker, you've got a mayor talking to you!" Excellent at putting Normie Adults off-balance. Has respect as an adult for kids who Would Prefer to be Treated With Dignity, Thanks (I HC that Mac and Nat Wright get along quite well for this reason)
-Ask Mayor MacCready: people being directed to you with bizarre inquiries? Probably knowing the answer to the bizarre inquiry but confused about why the fuck this person decided to come ask you about it? Relatable content. (See also "What do I look like, your tour guide?')
-Peaked In High School: Probably thinks people who knew him as a kid thought him way more impressive as a kid than they find him as an adult (at least, at this stage of adulthood). Publicly would take the stance "your point?;" privately, see Impostor Syndrome, infra.
-The One Absolute: For Mac the most obvious "inviolable rule" is the promise to Duncan, though he's got several. Relatable content. These rules may seem odd in the context of other rules not followed, but they are very important. (But see 'Loyal Unto Death™,' infra)
-Kathryn Janeway Depressive Disorder: Isolated from peers? Feeling the depression? Debuff acquired: Dark Room - forgets how to peer, forgets how to delegate, forgets how to keep people in the loop, forgets they don't have to do everything themselves, broods - oops
-Remove from VIP Room to Activate Functional Adult: Self-explanatory in part, given the whole "partnering up with you sure beats drinking myself blind in Goodneighbor" thing. Also relatable content. Fun fact: I do not drink when stressed! There's a good reason! Thus far, the rule has held for...fifteen years? But Mac never got that chance, given that he started at age six
-I (Don't) Want to Be Alone: Self-explanatory. Needs people per his own dialogue. Relatable content. For him, it's not surprising given that he basically grew up in a pack.
-Stop Bothering Me About It!: However, give the cat space when it is beneath the couch. (Thinking about how in 3 if you keep talking to him he'll blacklist you from Lamplight for a day) Also hc that the more you pester him about something, the less likely he is to want to address it (also relatable), though he will still do things he finds annoying as long as he can grouse ("Don't make me carry that worthless crap," as he takes the items from me anyway)
-Have Emergency, Will Travel: (immediately and for absurd distances) - self-explanatory
-This Beats Sitting Around: When anxiety, will die if not given task to dump said anxiety. Also self-explanatory
-The Devil's Own Luck Runs Out: has repeatedly survived but chronically Knows They Won't Survive This One, whatever that happens to be? more of a headcanon thing but oh yes
-Impostor Syndrome/'I Don't Know Anymore': sure, definitely a thing for him. Uh. And me.
-The Caves I Grew Up In : super-insulated environment during, and very unconventional, childhood - then unleashed to run about the greater world and wreak havoc
-Report to Baggage Claim Area: Heck we all have something going on -True Facts About: bizarre life experiences coming up in normal conversation that most people think are bullshit until they've known you long enough to realize that you're...actually serious? sure
-You're How Old?: self-explanatory, though I'm now of an age where it happens less thank goodness
-Aposematism: dresses to emit "don't fuck with me" vibes when situationally appropriate
-Loyal Unto Death™: once loyalty has been unlocked, unless an Unforgiveable Act is committed. Then will break otherwise inviolable personal mores to ensure it is clear that Loyalty Has Been Terminated. Will tell you if confronted in no uncertain terms why Loyalty Has Been Terminated -NERD!: obviously
-(longest for the end)This Is A Tree, What Forest?: This man focuses on some things to the exclusion of all others. He has single-minded tenacity for things he designates as high-priority. The flip side of this is that he's blindsided by/totally misses things that seem obvious: he is shocked to speechlessness to find out anyone has interest in him despite the SoSu dropping commuter-train-sized hints. He's definitely spooked by the idea of synths and is very wary of the Railroad, but totally misses the obvious analogy to the LW rescuing kids from (and potentially mowing down the slaver ring in) Paradise Falls. Again with synths - hc that he definitely knows Fawkes after he's released from Vault 87, so the idea of "this being is clearly A Person even though they're a ____" (mutant, synth, whatever) not parsing seems bizarre to me, unless framed as "shit, wow did I forget things I learned as a kid in the face of community indoctrination." Need I bring up his negative reaction to helping the kid in the fridge and certain reactions/dialogue when SoSu is looking for assistance finding Shaun? Speak of missing obvious analogies. I honestly think those are errors/Bethesda-continuity-check failures, but dear Lord. The guy only sees single trees and misses entire forests. He's also a sniper, and I think some of his being suited to that work has to carry over from his personality and how his mind works: he really needs a spotter (probably both figuratively and literally). I imagine his strengths lay in reacting, not acting. This man's biggest motivators are instinctual things: Love, immediate need for food/shelter, anger, fear. Instincts are reactive motivators. That makes him excellent at surviving the wastes, and made him excellent at his job in Lamplight, where quick reactions keep kids alive - plus in Lamplight he had some other Local Leaders around (Joseph, Lucy, Eclair, etc.) to help lay a groundwork to keep the place running. But without that? Boy howdy does he need someone to pick a direction and point him in it. He has excellent technical know-how and skill, and he's been doing his job for so long that routine can sub for forethought and/or for lots of the benefits having a sniper team would provide (assistance in scouting, researching marks, setting up/breaking down/concealing a position/nest, securing said locations, tracking targets, mapping routes, etc), but routine only keeps you alive for so long. For someone of his personality type, if I can be so bold, foresight is a learned skill and he's either put 0 skill points into it, or it's debuffed all to hell due to extreme stress from the circumstances he's in. He tried to Leeroy Jenkins Med-Tek. He's excellent at accruing income, and at bargaining (also a "think fast" reactive skill) but also holy shit does not budget (we know what Taka's noodles cost, and he also knows every bartender in the Commonwealth personally). He joined the Gunners, having grown up with the Capital Wasteland Gunners Talon Company in his backyard. He thinks (although he's not totally convinced) that he can pay off Winlock & Barnes. He needs a spotter, and I think that's critical to why he very quickly begins to work so well with, and click with, either a male or female SoSu. One is an attorney (practicing law is a team sport - my first mentor told me this and they're Words to Live By, I will die on that hill), the other is ex-Army (i.e, used to Working with Others, Or Else Death or Court-Martial), and so either would probably bring balancing skills to the table/be more balanced themselves in return. Even if they have some of the same issues he does, it's always easier to see/call someone on their issues than it is to accurately see/call yourself on them, so the benefits would still attach. This - all of this - is highly relatable for me. Having a team is crucial to my care and feeding. Without them I too find myself getting gnawed upon by ferals.
(tl;dr I'm clearly on the "Mac joins Piper in the ADHD Gang" train. I'd like to say I'm not projecting but that's probably impossible; that said, if you look at DSM-V criteria together with hyperfocus criteria/reactive motivators/what dopamine?/clearly needing to set inviolable boundaries to make himself do or not do things...I'd say he's got some objective ADHD vibes)
#eda speaks#oneifbyland#self-evaluation through works of fiction#headcanon kind of?#introspection through works of fiction#personal#but also fallout#rj maccready#maccready#robert joseph maccready
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Yugioh S5 Ep 20: Pharaoh’s Cool New Trick
Digging my way through quite a pile of commission work (funny how these things only come all at once or not at all), nearing the light at the end of the tunnel, was looking forward to some free time to catch up on my many little side projects when I was asked to take off for a weekend to do some cat-sitting to which I would NEVER say no to a cat, so like...Rip this blog I guess, we only update like once a week nowadays, but what do you do?
That’s right, play Puzzles and Dragons! The only phone game worth paying any attention to! Where they just released Pegasus on their Yugioh Collab and he looks pretty great!
So I’m just gonna take a second for some art appreciation, because the Puzzles and Dragons art team is just A++++ honestly, and yes, I did pull 13 times to get a Pegasus in my monster box, and yes, he is a completely insane team leader that is absolutely broken when paired with Yugi (the numbers are so satisfying) but...look at him. He looks so good!
(also I finally got Joey Wheeler, and so now my gatcha cravings are settled. And, don’t worry, I play this game so much that I was there during Christmas when they offered like a bajillion stones for free so I didn’t actually use real money on this.)
Now PAD also released a Weevil and Rex, and I don’t know why, and neither does the art team because they still look pretty good but in comparison to all the mains, they sure do looks like just some shorty guys in some casuals.
though I gotta admit, I want to learn how the hell this art team does swooshy effects, because man, that would make my art so much better to just have flames violently exploding out of all my art. Why am I not doing that more often? I have the technology.
anyway, I didn’t bother trying to pull them. Maybe I’ll accidentally pull them when they eventually release a Duke Devlin. (also, RIP to the fact that Roland will probably never be in Puzzles and Dragons but like...I can only send them so many polite letters covered in stickers pretending I’m some 10 year old child and writing in my broken Hiragana “Roland in PAD?”. Thems the breaks. (They also might not remember who Roland is.))
Shoutouts to the card that Weevil is holding that is censoring this nipple on the booby spider, PS.
So because this is not actually a Puzzles and Dragons blog, and it’s been ten eons since I regularly updated so I could remember episode to episode...where the hell were we?
That’s right, we’re on an island now. This show’s wonderful obsession with evil islands (and spoiler, this is one of the few Yugioh Islands that doesn’t explode at the end. Mostly because Kaiba isn’t here to do it or this place would be cinder)
(read more island stuff under the cut)
Anyway, after announcing “hey guys! Screw islands!” Yugi immediately collapses and without any warning.
Apparently the armor is a big ol parasite, which is something that Yugi is so used to at this point that he refuses to admit that this is a problem. Just normal Muto stuff, refusing to tell anyone that he has a serious illness going on underneath that giant mass of hair.
(the sailor moon vibes coming off this weird orb energy)
Sort of feels like a call back to S1 when Yugi was clearly possessed and everyone else was like “He acting weird to you?” except it’s S5 and everyone has learned to never trust Yugi when he says he’s fine and they are responding like he is about to die. Which is correct.
Outside of the cave falls this scroll that is...glowing, I guess. So they open it up and get a bunch of hieroglyphs that give them the “riddle of light” and like youknow...it’s riddle stuff.
They’re doing this riddle for “wings.” And it’s like...everyone’s monster here has a set of wings or an ability to fly. Every single monster except for I dunno, flaming swordsman? Hell, Yugi himself had two sets of wings when he fused with Dark Magician (which was weird, and I still don’t like to think about what technically was going on there.) But we have to go and get ourselves even more wings.
Weirdly, Joey turns to Tea and does something that in any other show would be completely normal. He was like “you want to stay here with Yugi, don’t you?” and it was the first time Joey has ever actually addressed the fact that Tea and Yugi are close. Uncharted territory. I was amazed at the amount of casual shipping that is happening here. It’s almost like a normal ass relationship.
So the boys decide to go off, and be boys and tackle this themselves. And they shouldn’t have, because Tea is smart for this group, and also has the only healing spell.
Like if you’re playing D+D you wouldn’t typically leave your only healer behind. Just saying.
Also like...Grandpa Muto went with them? I guess he’d have to since he’s the translator but also...kind of weird to leave your grandson dying in a cave, but maybe that’s just the Muto lifestyle.
Do not be fooled by my caps, no one has addressed the Bakura in the puzzle for 3 seasons. I’m starting to think this show will never address the Bakura in the puzzle. Which honestly, that would be hilarious if they made a big deal out of that plot point and then couldn’t use it in the end.
And speaking of plot points that kind of come out of nowhere and don’t make full sense with the continuity of the show--Joey has regressed back to the 4th grade.
Hey show? What?
So like if you love Joey, this is not the arc for you, because this arc he is reduced to a Himbo and nothing else. Straight up didn’t know what an echo is, but is very strong and pretty, I guess.
This inevitably happens with any TV show becuase different people make different parts, and I’ve brought up before that sometimes it feels like some teams only have loose post-it notes of what any character should be like at any given point (ESPECIALLY with Seto Kaiba’s timeline) but like...
...Personally I’m mot so fond of this interpretation of Joey, kind of ignores Joey’s best traits, and makes Tristan look way too smart in comparison (and like I always pinned Tristan to be the Himbo of the group, but maybe it’s because they give Tristan so little else to do?)
And like don’t get me wrong, Joey’s a dumbass a lot of the time and needs to get corrected by his pals...but...to the point he doesn’t know what an echo is? He’s a dumbass in a High School student sort of way, youknow?
Anyway, they get down to this big ravine, and they have to destroy this stone while the light passes over it. Kind of feels like a Breath of the Wild shrine quest, actually. In fact, I think Breath of the Wild recycled the shadow/sunlight pathing quest like 4 or 5 times. (I love Breath of the Wild to death but boy did they run out of ideas at the end there.)
They have to fight a glass monster and it’s kind of like...do you know the game Balls 3D? probably not, but it looked like a bunch of random shapes stuck together like a 90′s animation. They basically went to war with shapes.
Pure Himbo energy, has several pokemon, but punches for his pokemon instead of using them. A power move if I ever saw one.
Youknow that would make pokemon a lot more interesting if you could like throw out your pikachu, and then choose to just physically run up to your opponents Eevee and sock it in the jaw. Raise of hands--I know you all would love a version of pokemon like that. Let Ash Ketchum punch a Ratata.
Bro has informed me that Ash does do something like this in the anime. But I’m not talking about the anime, I’m talking about the video game. Give me the option to physically combat my rival. This is what I want, Pokemon.
They discover a way to break the monolith, and the show thinks we’re like actually 7 years old (because the show is Y7, although I forget because it deals with so many dark themes) so the show is going to hold on to this puzzle for a while...just to fill time. And it’s fine because we gotta switch over to Pharaoh anyway.
Yami has this dream again. He attempts to fuse with Dark magician to overcome the dream, but alas, he is still not strong enough.
Yugi wakes up in this murky cave while Tea is out washing out like...some rag? (he’s also still got a rag, so I guess multiple rags were required for how sweaty Yugi is.)
Yugi says “I feel like I’m a new man!” a lot in this episode, and every time he calls himself a man like he’s some sort of adult it’s very funny to me.
And then this plot lore dropped.
I mean I guess inevitably it had to happen...
But man, end of an era. It was freakin hilarious while it lasted: that Pharaoh refused to read ancient Egyptian because it’s like 2002 and he is a High Schooler living in Japan and he actually doesn’t WANT to resolve the mystery of the puzzle. Maybe the people who made this arc don’t know about how in S2 and S3, the fact Pharaoh couldn’t read Marik’s back tatt was like...a really big issue. He couldn’t read the God card, he couldn’t even read that massive tablet that read “HEY PHARAOH THIS IS LITERALLY YOU”. KAIBA had to tell him how to read the God card for him. Freakin Seto “Magic is a lie” Kaiba had to tell him how to use the God Card because Pharaoh couldn’t read it.
But like...Pharaoh finally gave in at some point after the world was devoured by the Leviathan, and before Kaiba finished building Kaibaland (which was already built in S1 but wtv)
The timelines on this show have always been a mishmash...but this one is just like...
...show are you trying to convince me that at any point in this show after season Zero, Pharaoh had any idea what he was doing? Did he sap that brain energy straight out of Joey Wheeler so he could do this?
Wow.
(secretly hoping he forgets how to read Egyptian after this arc is over and the show goes back to the other development team)
Pharaohs reasoning is that, if this is the riddle of the light.....
....then where is the riddle of darkness????????????
and when Tea was like “Pharaoh that is not even remotely logic. Omg it’s so bright outside, lets go back to gross cave.” and Pharaoh was like “Tea! You got it!” and she was like “What the hell are you talking about?”
Not gonna lie, I saw the Orichalcos green, and I got concerned.
Anyway, Yugi gets very frustrated and was like “ugh, lets go save em. They’re gonna die (again.)” and marches down there as if he didn’t pass out an hour ago.
And he fuses with Dark Magician again while everyone else (including his grandpa) was like “Yugi are you freakin kidding me? The suit freakin kills you omg! Tea you had one freakin job!”
And then we get the plot twist that...I mean it makes sense but it was choreographed in a confusing way.
And out of no where this guy shows up again:
So this mysterious man shows up and says “If you don’t succeed you have to live here forever” which...nice...that would probably save the world a lot of problems if Yami got locked away and took his OP puzzle with him. And then this man also says “if you do succeed you become VERY POWERFUL” and Yami was like. “...”
This whole episode had a theme to it, where Tristan and Joey were trying to prove that they could do things on their own and without Yugi’s help. And honestly...felt a little bit misplaced. Yami’s the same guy who murdered Yugi last season with the Orichalcos so like...
...I mean he is probably more reliable than Tristan who once died and turned into a robot monkey for 10ish episodes.
and then they flew into a glowing door.
Folks, this was wild to look at.
This is wild.
And at this point I closed Photoshop and thought I was done. But then I looked at my timeline on the video and was like...wait...there’s more?
and I’m really glad I kept watching because it went back to Alex, who...is apparently just still at those steps in this haunted ass Pyramid.
Now we’re watching Yugioh.
I forgot for a second when they turned Joey into a Himbo and made Pharaoh literate, but we’re back. I mean...
...look at the liner art on this adult man.
So...I posit the question...has Alex spent the last 2-3 episodes doing nothing but applying eyeliner to his face in the dark? Because he absolutely has. And honestly, the vibe of being in a spooky haunted pyramid with barely any light, just applying eyeliner down the edge of your face...that’s a Yugioh vibe, if I ever saw one.
This arc is wild. Anyway, next episode we do even more fetch quests and riddles? Just going to guess now that we probably will.
(and for those new here, this is a link so you can read them from the top. Which, since we’re in S5, means you got like...hours of Yugioh content to read through. Enjoy the rewards of my weird hobby.)
https://steve0discusses.tumblr.com/tagged/yugioh/chrono
#Yugioh#Yu-Gi-Oh#yami yugi#S5#Ep20#It's actually Ep 20 now I was wrong last time#Yugi muto#Grandpa Muto#Alexander the Great#Joey Wheeler#Tristan Taylor#Tea Gardner#TeaxYugi#never thought I would ever use that tag#in this show where they are canonically dating but sometimes it happens#Puzzles and Dragons#Because yes I had to talk about it. This collab is great
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You know what just to SPICE it up a bit imma say zadr too bitch
This bitch tryna give me arthritis smdh. Making me out myself for my dual-ship on main, can't even believe a bitch.
PRE-RELATIONSHIP
1. How did they first meet?
School. We must never forget the infamous handcuffs scene.
2. What was their first impression of each other?
Pure, unrivaled loathing.
3. Did any of their friends or family want them to get together?
Gaz said "kiss already" and throws things at them when they're getting too far away from "I want you dead" territory and well into "you want to fuck me so bad and it makes you look stupid" territory. Professor Membrane thinks they're adorable.
4. Who felt romantic feelings first?
Dib. Hormones get the best of us all. You can only be obsessed with someone so long before motivations get blurry.
5. Did either of them try to resist their feelings?
Zim would nearly break his PAK and commit accidental die trying to delete the emotions or install an emotional inhibitor. Dib would have a full mental breakdown trying to sort through it, which would manifest poorly in his behavior and negatively impact his ability to engage in their usual altercations. Pro tip: if you are painfully attracted to someone, being in a position where they pin you to the asphalt or lean over your desk to hiss insults at you is a bad idea.
6. If you had told one of them that the other would be their soulmate, what would they think?
I stand by what I said on my ZAGR post in that Zim doesn't know what a soulmate is, or the concept of a soul, but given this is in regards to his arch-nemesis instead of a creature he's mostly indifferent too, he'd be pissed at the insinuation he was in any way bound to Dib. Dib's fragile psyche would not survive the revelation.
7. What would their lives be like if they had never met?
Really empty. Their rivalry and parallel situations regarding neglectful authority figures is what keeps them going for so many years.
GENERAL
1. Who initiated the relationship, and how did it go?
As someone who thinks Zim doesn't understand even the concept of not being a possessive jackass, I think Zim just sort of concludes after awhile that, regardless of Dib's feelings, or even Zim's own feelings, whatever they have makes them wholly and entirely each other's. Just completely and hilariously misunderstanding the concept of a relationship, but still being incredibly presumptive in assuming they already have one. He also doesn't let Dib know of this revelation either, so eventually Dib explodes about his crush, and Zim's like "we are already together???? moron???" Dib could argue, and he kind of wants to, but he also never expected Zim to reciprocate, so he just sort of nods and is like "you know what, sure" and that's the end of it. They do not have an anniversary, but Dib's not really like that, and Zim doesn't know anniversaries are a thing anyways.
2. Did they have an official first date? If so, what was it like?
Again, stealing from my own ZAGR post, but I don't think Zim's really a 'date' person who would plan out that sort of thing. Dib is an awkward moron with arguably worse social skills than even Zim, and mentally comes to the conclusion that dragging Zim on investigations is basically like a date, and Zim doesn't bitch about it anymore than expected, therefore he is a master of romance, so it's fine.
3. What was their first kiss like?
Awkward, and quick. Dib is not a great communicator, nor is he great at explaining things like human demonstrations of affection, especially not when Zim's scowling impatiently at him through is fumbling and stuttering. He just goes for it, and it's quick and he misses his mouth almost. Zim is extremely surprised, especially when Dib makes terrible excuses about needing to be elsewhere and flees. Zim does his own research, and their second kiss is predated by a lecture about being better than Dib at everything/Dib being bad at everything. It is much more successful, even if afterwards Dib instigates a fight about Zim's tongue being weird.
4. Were they each other’s first anything (kiss, relationship, etc.)?
First everything, except kiss. Gretchen kissed Dib in high school as a dare. Zim will never forgive her for it.
5. What’s their height difference? Age difference?
I'd die to make them the same height, but I think the image of Zim being average height while Dib is a gangly big boi is just too funny. Zim would be pissed, and Dib would be so smug but so uncoordinated.
6. What’s their relationship with each other’s families?
Gaz interacts with them as minimally as possible, because they are loud and gross and annoying, but she's okay with Zim overall. They have a mutual understanding that Dib is stupid, completely reckless, and requires constant supervision to keep him from getting eaten by a ghoul or something. Gaz does genuinely trust him to skewer anything that tries to kill her brother, but she also knows that Dib isn't the only one with 0 sense of self-preservation. Dib was initially wary of Professor Membrane's reaction, because his dad is sort of unpredictable when it comes to his only son, but the Professor's only commentary is that he is glad his son finally made it official with his 'little green friend.' Dib then realizes that the implication in that perpetual comment about Zim had air quotes around that "friend" part all along.
Dib thinks Gir's gross and loud and doesn't get him, but he likes to team up with him and/or use him as a means to annoy Zim. The Base hates him, because now there's two morons with no sense of self-preservation that it needs to keep track of. Minimoose and Dib are bros.
7. Who takes the lead in social situations?
Zim, if only because he is arguably more 'charming' than Dib's fumbling attempts at communication with non-paranormal parties.
8. Who gets jealous easier?
Zim. Dib I think would have his 'HTTYD Hiccup moment' as he gets older, but still has that ingrained low self-esteem from years of ridicule and abuse. He is completely oblivious to the new attention he gets. Zim, however, is not. Dib never really notices the cause of his weird snarling and clinginess, but he shrugs it off as Zim just being weird and continues with whatever he was doing.
9. Who whispers inappropriate things in the other’s ear?
Zim is a slut, I will die on this hill.
LOVE
1. Who said “I love you” first?
Dib. He says it casually, in the dark, when they're on a stake-out to find some wood goblin or something. He says it like he's talking about something plane and unremarkable.
I think a ZADR relationship would need Zim to be a lot more independent in terms of researching how romantic relationships 'work,' since Dib's not a great communicator, and there's an ingrained rivalry that will never dissolve between them, no matter how many times they kiss, so Zim would be a lot more motivated to figure things out on his own. He would, in this circumstance, know the weight of Dib's way-too-casual admittance, and it would be a huge shock to him. He'd be pretty shaken about it for awhile, and Dib's not bothered when he doesn't reply. Dib would be pretty sure Zim would never admit it, but he does, eventually, because he refuses to be a coward about it.
2. What are their primary love languages?
Verbal affirmations. With their self-esteems firmly in the toilet in Zim's kitchen, being able to have someone validate them who they respect would mean a lot to them.
3. Who uses cheesy pick-up lines?
Dib. He uses it to start fights with Zim about linguistics and metaphors. Also, he's 99.9% positive Zim secretly is flattered by it, but hates that he is.
4. How often do they cuddle/engage in PDA?
Zim is very clingy, but Dib's too on the move to really pin down for a good cuddle frequently. He's twitchy and his minds always racing, but every once in a while when Zim's completely fed up, or Dib's running on fumes but still forcing himself on, Zim will all but pin him to a cushioned surface and force him to sleep. Neither of them are PDA people.
5. Who initiates kisses?
Zim. Dib's really shy about it, and also normally too distracted to pay Zim the attention he so obviously deserves, and often misses Zim's 'signals.'
6. Who’s the big and little spoon?
PAK not comfy against sternum. It's also easier to force Dib to sleep if he's the big spoon, because he can pin his limbs.
7. What are their favorite things to do together?
Paranormal investigations, and morally ambiguous and/or largely dangerous experiments.
8. Who’s better at comforting the other?
Dib, which is hilarious, because he's about as smooth as a cheese grater, but he is very attuned to the person he's been obsessed with for years, and he can also relate to a lot of his issues. While Zim usually shrugs off the sentimentality and the empathy, dismissing it as 'pity,' the affirmation means a lot to him.
9. Who’s more protective?
Zim. He has to anticipate his lover's stupidity to make sure he stays alive to hunt ghosts another day.
10. Do they prefer verbal or physical affection?
Verbal. Hormones are real, but there's something that eases the sting of years of abusive in a crooning praise or a sincere compliment.
11. What are some songs that apply to their relationship, in-universe or otherwise?
https://open.spotify.com/track/3IvUhEVbbA81QnEVhsFHiH?si=b3c5787c9ff14105
12. What kind of nicknames do they call each other?
It is primarily age-old insults that lack the bite and sincerity they once had.
13. Who remembers the little things?
Dib. Zim isn't inattentive by any means, cataloguing all of Dib's weird habits and nuances and what not, but for all the compensating Zim does to keep Dib safe and healthy, Dib reciprocates in meaningful gestures. He remembers to pack Zim-friendly snacks on their road trips and ways to keep Gir entertained, if they have to bring him. He always checks the weather and has an extra coat, just in case. Never makes Zim feel bad about needing to check, just one more time, to see if he got any incoming messages from home.
DOMESTIC LIFE
1. If they get married, who proposes?
Dib.
2. What’s the wedding like? Who attends?
It's just Gaz, Minimoose, and Gir. Membrane is too far away to attend, but that was deliberate. Dib didn't want his tendency to make things about 'the Membrane line' effect the intimacy and importance of the ceremony. Also, Zim insists on incorporating some Irken rituals into it, so it'd be hard to make excuses and explanations to why Zim wants Dib to fuck with his weird pink backpack during their wedding.
3. How many kids do they have, if any? What are they like?
No kiddos. Neither of them would be interested, even if it was biologically possible.
4. Do they have any pets?
Seriously, Gir counts, right?
5. Who’s the stricter parent?
Dib. Zim refuses to parent Gir when Dib is more inclined to do it, since he's more irritated by it.
6. Who worries the most?
Dib has perpetual anxiety. So does Zim, but he masks it better.
7. Who kills the bugs in the house?
Dib, to prevent the gooey grossness that is Gir's bug-breath.
8. How do they celebrate holidays?
Just with Gaz.
9. Who’s more likely to convince the other to come back to sleep in the morning?
Zim will strap Dib to a bed himself to get him to go the fuck to sleep, because it's been over 48 hours you insufferable human, and--!
10. Who’s the better cook?
Dib's idea of cooking is a microwave, salt, and pepper. Zim is forced to learn the wonders of human food to keep his idiot from dying of malnutrition.
11. Who likes to dance?
Gir.
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Most of the "bad bro Dick" stuff seems to be the DickBats era. Except it's Dick literally being torn between the bats, the titans, the Wilson family, and the JLA. And none of the bats, not even Dick and Tim, are mentally well during this time. (Dick confesses he loathes human contact. Tim grasps at straws to prove Bruce is alive.) All of that, AND Jason and Damian are trying to murder Tim.
I just have no love for that era of Bat-Family. Like legitimately nearly everything in it is so overrated to me.
Besides some elements of Red Robin (which even then I don't like, because in the long run it really fucked with Tim), they didn't even use the whole idea of "OH NO BRUCE IS DEAD" well in that era.
There's just some moments and overall besides continuing the idea of "WE MUST FIND BATMAN" which eventually happens in Batman and Robin (sort of invalidating that whole thing in Red Robin, and just feels ridiculous as a consequence that they eventually agree eventually anyway just to give them more to do that's relevant to the situation.) it just felt typical if not below average.
But like the whole effect it had on the Bat-Family absolutely ruined it in the long run too. Dick and Tim's relationship disappeared in the comics and in the fandom for the most part. And people seem to think Dick only really cares that much for one other Robin.
And it's not even entirely accurate to what happened. It was just so melodrama filled and people felt so sympathetic towards Tim that they just ignored that he looked like a crazy person.
Now, I don't like that they made Tim turn up near insane just to validate the plot because I think that's super cheap compared if they just grounded it a bit.
Cause now Tim looks like a child beater, Damian's acting like a normal bratty kid rather than an entitled non-joker as he was actually supposed to be characterized, and Dick doesn't even look the best given he already knew Tim was deeply connected to the role of Robin, and is implied to know Tim has suicidal thoughts.
So they all look awful just characterization wise.
Dick was also protective of Tim. Now he’s saying he’s as good as he is? Tim was a crime-fighter for 4 years, Dick fought crime for over a decade. All in an attempt to validate a change of identity, but all it does is sound ridiculous when you think about it. Like, oh really, the kid who’s thing was that he wasn’t a natural, and had to work extra hard, which made it his charm, was suddenly just as good as someone who had about as much experience as the legends in the crime-fighting business? In fact probably fighting crime BEFORE a lot of those big names?
But cause people act like Red Robin is Tim's Nightwing, when he already had a whole solo as Robin that lasted over 180 issues, they start there, and just accept that Tim and Dick have a rough relationship, that comes off more as Tim faking that he trusts him cause he's so suicidal and just happens to be picked up. Or at least so I seen from a lot of people.
Read some random fic out of boredom and the whole time it was like "NOT AFTER YOU TRIED TO PUT ME IN THE ASYLUM. YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO TALK TO ME", and my face just got more tired, and my mind stalled, and it was so tedious it put me right to sleep.
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Unpopular Opinion: Optimus Prime isn't a very good person and that he's too glorified. (expect TFA Optimus)
strongly agree | agree | neutral | disagree | strongly disagree
What can I say except that there are many, many Optimus'/Convoy's out there and making a general opinion on them just doesn't work.
But I couldn't think of any Optimus I experienced who wasn't deep down a good person - lets make a roll call shall we? (includes all shows except RB and RBA + Bayverse)
G1 Optimus Prime - Good person, good leader, good father figure. Is forgiving towards wrong-doers without being a pushover. Couldn't think of anything he does that is sketchy
Beast Wars Optimus Primal - He has a harsh personality, hits Rattrap on the back of his head when the Rat talks bullshit and can get feral against his own teammates when they are being assholes like Depth Charge - but all in all, he is still a good leader and a good person. He simply has a more down-to-earth personality and a no-bullshit attitude.
He only ever reacts angrily because his team do stupid and jerkass stuff, but he is never unreasonable.
When he gets angry, you know why and you get why.
Also, he gave Dinobot a chance as a Maximal two times, so he too has a forgiving nature. And his dynamic with Depth Charge shows that he isn't petty either. ("I don't like him much either, but he's still a Maximal.")
He also had a nice moment with Blackarachnia in which he assures her they won't do anything about her coding against her will and that she is safe with them.
Beast Wars II Lio Convoy - The only thing you could call him out for is for refusing the father role when he found out he has a son. It took him half the show to actually call Lio Junior his son, but it made for a nice story! Also, he was willing to make peace with Galvatron in the show, showing his forgiving nature.
Beast Wars Neo Big Convoy - The shy and awkward one! He's a treat who learns to become a good teacher and leader with the help of his students, and he had this moment in which he tried to save Magmatron's life from Unicron. He is a hero with a strong sense of justice who needed to learn about proper teamwork and friendship and it's a really simple and sweet story.
Beast Machines Optimus Primal - This dude is such a trainwreck and I cannot in good conscious say he was always on the right side of things, I admit that.
The way the show treated the Vehicons was a little sketchy, because the Maximals technically became hypocrits, especially when it was about Silverbolt.
Forcing the "techno-organic is the real way to be" unto the non-organic characters feels a little weird, because the show never properly showed us why being without an organic side is supposed to be so bad. (And this matters because the good vs evil conflict isn't properly connected to the techno vs organic plot).
So this Oppy you can make the point that he isn't all that good as he pretends to be in his preachy cult leader role.
RiD01 Optimus Prime/Fire Convoy - Listen, this is the most naive and cute Optimus out there. This dude was willing to let Decepticons into their base just because they were like "We are good now :)" without even checking first.
His dynamic with his jerkass twin Magnus supports that - he doesn't want to fight his brother! The dude fucking pushes him off a cliff and he still tries to reason with him and doesn't fight back at all!
Don't you ever dare call this Prime a bad person, he's precious! xD
Armada Optimus Prime/Convoy - This is the dude who goes fucking feral at the end and shows just how much hatred and anger a Prime can store - but really just towards the end! The rest of the show he's your typical leader who doesn't do anything bad.
And when he made mistakes, he corrected them.
The fact that he always had this hatred and rage that he pushed aside all the time is the most interesting thing about this Prime, but even that doesn't make him a secretely bad person, because he still doesn't do anything bad. He's just an angry boi.
Energon Optimus Prime/Grand Convoy - This is technically the same Prime as Armada, and for once that shows - that anger Prime showed at the end of Armada is still present here and shows up a few times, especially when it's about Unicron.
But just like in Armada, he doesn't do anything bad.
He even tries to save Shockblast, the jerkiest jerk of the entire show, from Unicron's influence! And did just that with Galvatron at the end as well with the full intend to sacrifise himself to save everyone, including the Cons.
Cybertron Optimus Prime/Galaxy Convoy - My favourite Prime of them all - this Prime is just a damn Papa Bear! He will be considerate and loving towards his men, but if you bully his kids, you'll catch his hands bro.
He's bit a stoic dude, but shows compassion and kindness when he needs to.
He doesn't do anything sketchy either, and lets the few remaining Cons be part of the Transformers society in the end, despite their misdeeds before.
TFA Optimus Prime - The one you say is the only good Prime? Guess so, he's a good person as well! He makes mistakes (like insulting his team) but learns and grows from them.
But mate - he isn't a better person than any of the other Prime's I just listed. The only difference between TFA Prime and the other Primes so far is that TFA Prime is a narrative underdog who you are supposed to feel pity for.
All the other Prime's are leaders in a leader role, so just from a narrative standpoint, you don't feel the same sympathy for them as you do for TFA Prime.
But being an underdog doesn't translate to being a better person. The Joker in the Joker movie is also an underdog, but no one says he's a good person and that everything he does in this movie is justified.
TFA Prime just goes through more harsh shit that isn't Megatron and that's it. He isn't being a better hero or person for that.
TFP Optimus Prime - Yeah, I saw the opinion that him being too forgiving towards Megatron in the past is a flaw and that he cares more about this one silver shark more than about the safety of the universe - to which I say: WHEN???
This is a thing Ratchet accuses him off! But I couldn't remember a single scene in this show in which Optimus does, in fact, let Megatron go when he had the chance to kill him!
They always fought to the death when they did and Megatron surviving wasn't because Optimus was too nice. He's not Son Goku peeps.
And I have my issues with TFP Prime and how his characters is written, but being a secretely bad person aint it. He isn't a bad person.
If this is also about Starscream - he has every right to not trust Starscream. No one should trust Starscream! Starscream doesn't exist to be trusted by anyone.
You cannot call Prime a bad person because he elects to not trust the notorious backstabber, who, as Prime himself as pointed out, only does things for his own gain.
Also, he did try to make peace with Starscream after Megatron's "Death", and Starscream refused.
Is it about him destroying the Omega Lock? Nothing wrong with that! He chose to save Earth and all its Humanity over restoring a dead planet! Dead planet stays dead, alive planet stays alive. No one died by his decision to destroy the Omega Lock - but a whole ass planet would have died if he hadn't.
Like bro - I am not a big sucker for TFP Prime, but all these points I see floating around to prove that he is actually a bad person are kinda weird and biased.
Why should he have given Starscream a chance? To get backstabbed and used??? Which we know would have happened because this is fucking Starscream we are talking about??? A dude who doesn't care about Earth in the slightest and was happy about it being destroyed? Who only cares about power and winning this war, which is why he goes back to Megatron???
Should have sacrifised Earth? Would that have made him a true hero???
RiD15 Optimus Prime - This TFP Prime, just sterner, weaker and ready to start beef. But ultimately still a good guy.
Bayverse Optimus Prime - Here you got a Prime who kills his enemies! For anyone saying that TFP Prime is bad for not killing Megatron when he could, do you at least like Bayverse Prime for doing just that? Three times???
Even though he kills all his enemies, I never saw that as him being evil. He just doesn't give second chances. And it was refreshing to see a hero who actually does get rid of his enemies before they can do more shit.
He aint the nicest bot in town, but in the end he still did the heroic thing.
Movie 4 even gave him an arc about losing his faith in humanity and not wanting to help them anymore, but in the end he still does because his Barn Husband Cade convinces him to.
Good man I say, good man!
Prime Wars Optimus Prime - He tried to stop Windblade from making a mistake that would end in war with an emphasis on Windblade herself - saying that war is horrible and he doesn't want her to go through the same thing.
He then decides to help her anyway when he learns what the stakes are, is giving Megatron a second chance, keeps being on friendly footing with the dude and dies in an attempt to destroy the bad guy.
All in all, a good boy!
Cyberverse Optimus Prime - He forbids his soldiers from taking Energon from a foreign planet because the local fauna need it to survive - he constantly tries to do peace talks and doesn't give up on them - He dances in front of his crew to cheer them up - he shows remorse about what happened to Wild Wheel and tries to make things right again - he holds the dead Megatron in his arms and calls him his old friend-
Nothing bad about this home boy!
War for Cybertron Optimus Prime - he fucks up the whole damn time, but he has good intentions! He's a flawed individual who realises what his mistakes are!
Making mistakes, even as grand as his, doesn't make him a bad person!
So, no - I don't agree that Optimus is bad person and I also don't agree that TFA Prime is a better person than any other Prime.
Almost all these Prime's do good things, protect life, try to choose peace over conflict at least once and have a forgiving nature (even Bayverse Optimus, as he forgives humanity) - that all good guy qualities for me!
What more do you want from him to be a good person? Be nice to Starscream off all people???
Also, what do you even consider to be "too glorified"??? The newest media like WFC doesn't even depict him as a good leader because he fucks up so bad.
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Hello! I saw your post about Hajime and Hiyoko’s moments and her FTEs and I fully agree about how they are amazing and underrated. I wanted to ask you for your thoughts on a hc of mine if that’s okay?
Just, I hc Hajime is like a big brother figure for Hiyoko and that they have a bit of a found family trope because Hiyoko’s family from what I know sucks (besides her Dad) and Hajime just kinda became her big brother figure after she came to trust him. And like, she is still a brat but is trying to be better and one time someone asked her in the group if she liked Hajime and she just yells “Gross, he’s basically my big brother!” And ever since then it’s kinda just established he is Hiyoko’s brother and he teases her about it a bit ( which always makes her embarrassed and grumpy like an angry kitten.)
Idk, I’m just really soft for a really good friendship between Hajime and Hiyoko where they both get each other’s issues and help each other out because Hajime is one of the characters who I thinks really understands her well, and I hc them with a big brother/little sister dynamic and wanted your thoughts on it 👉👈
Hi there! First of all, thanks! It’s really cool to see that there are others in the fandom who appreciate their friendship.
Secondly, I really do like that and I do feel like Hiyoko does have a big brother/little sister dynamic with Hajime. I could see him being a lil shit about her offhandedly referring to him as her big bro (which she does in the Japanese version of the game anyways) and he is quite snarky with her in general, so it would be a brilliant way to get her flustered. Especially since Hiyoko does get easily embarrassed when she is actually making the effort to be nice, so something cute like that would drive her crazy if she slipped up and called him Big Bro in front of the others.
That being said, yeah, I really do think it speaks to both of their characters about how well they kind of vibe together. The entire game has a very found family kind of theme to it more so than the other games. Like the other games (aside from Toko and Komaru of UDG), I could see the characters being friends while I think of the second cast as “they’re family and they can’t live without each other”.
This is something I wanted to talk about though. It’s that Hiyoko’s character gets a lot of flak because people feel like her arc is very unfinished considering it was revised so Fuyuhiko would live when she was originally supposed to be a survivor. That is fair. I would have liked to see how that would turn out. But a big thing that people also don’t pay attention to is how Hiyoko feels and why she relapsed. As a person who wasn’t always so… good, I really felt for her as she was trying to make changes, trying to be a better person, but when things did look dire, she also wanted to protect herself too. Trusting others is terrifying. Who does she have to trust? Her father? He loved her but couldn’t protect her. Her family? They took her away from the one person who wanted to protect her from pedophiles who came to watch her and placed her in a profession that subjected her to assassination attempts and horrible, life-threatening pranks. Can she trust the people on this island? No. Some of them took the one person she really cared for away from her again. So she retreats inward, relapses, gets mean to defend herself and keep people away.
And who understand her? Who knows that she made the effort to try and get over herself to come to Fuyuhiko’s recovery party? Hajime. This is why he’s my favorite main character. He knows that Hiyoko was trying. “You’d never know beyond her cutesy appearance that Hiyoko was so bratty and selfish. But she was trying to change herself and she was coming to terms with Mahiru’s death.” And “I understand why you went to the music venue. You were doing it to keep Mahiru’s lessons close to you… but still…” Like he genuinely mourns her passing. Besides Mahiru and Chiaki (who is perceptive enough to see when Hiyoko is making the effort as well), you can argue that Hajime is the one who understands Hiyoko the most. And of course, it’s always been reciprocated on some level from Hiyoko too. When they first meet, she even offers for him to help her squish ants, then remarks that he’s a wuss for turning her down. So she already had an interest in him as I’m guessing she would not be extending that invitation to others given how she is. We go from that to her telling him about her family, to telling him that her biggest belief is that the greatest gift you can give someone is to protect them to asking him to come see her dance and that it’s so important to her that she would hate him forever if he fell asleep. And in the special Island Mode, she then says that she wants to protect him too.
I just… I love their friendship. I love this cast. I love this game. I love them!
#danganronpa#hajime hinata#hiyoko saionji#sorry for the long post#thank you for the ask!#it made me so happy!#danganronpa 2 goodbye despair
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Chapter 24: “Seeing is Believing” of “pride is not the word I’m looking for” random favorite lines and commentary. Not a full list or full commentary, but longer commentary than usual to talk about quest construction.
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AN: This was... a weird chapter to write. When I started outlining, I had... the conversation with Shen Qingqiu planned... the conversation with Shen Yuan planned... the fact that SQH, SY, LQG, and LFL was the quest party... and the fact that they get the Eye at the end of it. That was everything.
The entire rest of this chapter came together FRIDAY LAST WEEK.
Huan Hua Palace wasn’t going to be there. The Weeper didn’t exist. The Eye or its previous owner wasn’t at all connected to the Garden Master. The Shadow Cave Wolf Spiders didn’t exist. The murder plant didn’t exist. The mysterious monster showing up at the end wasn’t originally planned either.
I mean, I had a lot of pre-existing plot threads to tie in and weave with, but ohhh boy! Picture someone lying facedown on a floor like, “I forgot to plan the contents of the super important quest...”
I was originally going to have the Eye quest a lot simpler, but given the weight “Death of the Author” had when I finally reached this part of the story, that wasn’t really going to do! It had to be bigger than that! It needed oomph! This also felt like a good opportunity to really establish the new SQH-SY dynamic. To explore SY fumbling to find a place in this world without strict character role, especially in relation to settled and well-supported SQH.
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“One attempts to remain dignified,” Shen Qingqiu agrees. “As there is little point in kicking and screaming about how such ignobility isn’t fair.”
“Ha! Is there ever?”
“Not in my experience.”
“Yeah, it’s definitely not cute when I do it,” Shang Qinghua jokes.
Shen Qingqiu’s lips actually twitch at that.
Success?!
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AN: I wasn’t going into this fic with the intention of writing any Shang Qinghua and Original Shen Qingqiu almost friendship! But it started developing and it seemed a shame not to explore Shang Qinghua developing a real relationship with Shen Qingqiu (though not a particularly close one) when the man is suppose to be the scum villain (and the readers know that the man might get replaced by Shen Yuan).
I can see myself writing more Shang Qinghua and Original Shen Qingqiu content in the future. Someone dropped a particularly nice prompt for them in my inbox that I’m looking forward to exploring at some point.
(I mean, not to say that Shang Qinghua has a type, but Shang Qinghua has a type and it’s handsome, deadly, intimidating, frosty men with a villainous character design and trust/abandonment and communication issues. I could make it work.)
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“Ah, well, two ‘ideal’ situations come to mind: severing the personal relationship for good… or, ah, talking about how to do better and trying that. You don’t have to forget or even forgive if you don’t want to! But, ah… there’s got to be a difference between totally swallowing your anger and cutting ties forever, right?” Shang Qinghua says awkwardly. “If there’s… ever going to be anything good afterwards…”
Shen Qingqiu stares at him for a sweat-inducing length of time.
“Ah, fuck,” Shang Qinghua thinks.
“Sorry,” he says. “Ahhh, I’m just… thinking about something someone told me… in… in regards to some of my own problems. Never mind! Never mind!”
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AN: Luo Jiahui really is out here making Moshang and Qijiu get their fucking act together just by setting a better example.
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“Shizun, my apologies for the interruption, but I came to ask Shizun if he would be willing to join our music lesson today? The disciples have missed his playing and are eager to present their improvements.”
“...Very well, unless anyone here would disagree…?” Shen Qingqiu looks directly at the Qian Cao Peak cultivator, as though daring her to object and die.
“It’s an excellent suggestion!” the Qian Cao Peak cultivator says quickly.
The young woman smiles. “And perhaps Shizun could sit in on the calligraphy lesson afterwards? In order to offer his opinion on my progress as a teacher?”
“Fishing for compliments is unbecoming,” Shen Qingqiu says dryly.
“Wait, what?” Shang Qinghua thinks.
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AN: So, this has all been happening in the background, but Shen Qingqiu accepted this House of Rejuvenation woman onto his Peak about... 6-ish years ago now? This is kind of meant to parallel Shang Qinghua’s once-secret relationship with Luo Jiahui.
Shang Qinghua was out here trying to be a better person and Shen Qingqiu noticed; now Shen Qingqiu has his own positive (platonic) relationship with a nameless background character who was meant to die for plot reasons. What a thing, huh? If the story was saved because Shang Qinghua started a domino effect of saving random people who went on to change things?
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After all, as Shang Qinghua said to the kid, besides Peerless Cucumber’s apparent talent for cultivation, he knows that his fellow transmigrator has three very important skills that will serve him well on An Ding Peak! 1) An encyclopedia knowledge for even seemingly pointless bullshit (which is kind of flattering, honestly). 2) The willingness to fight total strangers over seemingly pointless bullshit. And 3) a sharp enough tongue to win.
Peerless Cucumber didn’t find these points as funny as Shang Qinghua did.
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AN: Shen Yuan was always going to end up on An Ding Peak. I thought about sending him to Qing Jing or Qian Cao or Qiong Ding... or any other Peak... but that would take him too far away from Shang Qinghua to really explore their relationship and to move him around conveniently in the story. And SY sticking to An Ding seemed to best illustrate the fact that SY is lost and doesn’t know what to do except cling to SQH.
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“It’s not much, sure, but it’s yours,” Shang Qinghua says finally. “You’ll be joining the talisman classes soon, so don’t try anything from a book and then need to request some home repairs.”
Peerless Cucumber nods and puts his stack of manuals down on the table.
“How’s your tutorial mission going?”
“Fine,” the kid says shortly. “Have you found anything for the other one yet?”
“Ah, not yet.”
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AN: “Are you winning, son?” meme energy here.
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Ah, now Shang Qinghua recognizes his fellow transmigrator’s expression! That’s the same stunned expression one of his Huan Hua not-disciples, Yu Chaonan, made upon meeting the Bai Zhan Peak War God for the first time. Shang Qinghua assumes that Peerless Cucumber was expecting a man who looked more like a musclebound giant and less like a pop idol (if one with amazingly muscular arms), which is a super common and never-not-funny misconception people have about Liu Qingge.
“Brother of one of the most beautiful women in this world, bro,” Shang Qinghua reminds his fellow transmigrator, amused. Aha! Now Peerless Cucumber’s vehement disinterest in the harem stuff is making even more sense than before!
Shang Qinghua’s assumption gets 100% confirmed when it comes time for Peerless Cucumber to fly with Liu Qingge for the next leg of the journey. The other transmigrator is so embarrassed and awkward about it that Shang Qinghua’s super direct brother-in-law asks if the young man is alright.
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AN: This was so fun to write. Shang Qinghua really can use the Liu siblings to gauge people’s sexual/romantic orientation.
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The map (or rather, the copy Shang Qinghua made of the delicate original map) takes them to a green and grey landscape of leafy trees crawling over a wide network of tall cliffs and deep gorges. Gurgling rivers cut through twisting rock formations. Shang Qinghua can’t see any of these rivers on the map. Or these deathly drop ravines. From the outside, the whole thing looks like a natural maze (holy shit, there could be so many monsters and death-traps in there!), and Shang Qinghua would know those golden robes flying low over the hanging trees anywhere.
“Huan Hua,” Liu Qingge mutters.
“Do you think they’re looking for what we’re looking for?” Luo Fanli asks.
“That’s usually how it goes,” Peerless Cucumber says, before Shang Qinghua can.
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AN: I came up with the skeleton idea first. Then I was like... “I should give it three eyes.” And then I was like... “But who IS this dead author? A god? A spirit? What grander implications am I spinning here?”
And THEN I remembered that I had some ambiguous powerful being force the Garden Master into exile due to a flood. This was because, in the Epic of Gilgamesh, the immortal man Gilgamesh meets in the abyss is the survivor of a great flood. So I was like, “Reduce! Re-use! Recycle! There’s my skeleton!”
So I wanted to relate the skeleton to water because of the flood angle. Water as a symbol of cleansing/reincarnation is a big thing throughout many cultures. I can’t remember exactly how the crying aspect came up, but I knew there was going to be water in the temple now, so at some point my brain like was, “Bro, this skeleton should totally be crying because mythology vibes.”
So I built the surrounding land off the idea that there was water flowing from or around this temple. At this point, I had decided that Huan Hua Palace should also be looking for this artifact, so I had to come up with a way to hide the temple, yet have a way for SQH’s party to track it down.
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The damage to the doors is worse: someone once upon a time collapsed a part of the cliff face around the entrance, essentially leaving only the top fourth of the utterly smashed stone doors visible. It’s a wall now and has been for ages. It looks like it would take days to dig through the rubble. Someone has even super helpfully carved, “These doors will never open again,” just above the wreck.
“Guess we’ll have to go in as intruders rather than guests!” Luo Fanli says.
“What would be welcoming us inside a lost temple exactly?” Shang Qinghua asks vaguely, inwardly cursing the fact that explosive mining techniques will definitely attract the Huan Hua Palace Sect cultivators’ attention and also probably collapse the whole cliff on them.
“We only have to clear a passage for us, not the whole door,” Peerless Cucumber says optimistically. “Is there a special technique for this kind of thing?”
“Aha, not really.”
“Oh.”
“Why don’t we just keep following the water?” Luo Fanli says.
“...How so?” Shang Qinghua asks.
“Some of those waterfalls could be passages inside,” Liu Qingge explains, because he and the little sister-in-law apparently share the same brain. He’s already eyeing the waterfall wearing down the giant statue on the left.
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AN: Temples in quests need to have traps and obstacles and monsters! Well, not ALL of the did, but this one did. I based the obstacles they faced as much as I could around the whole “Death of the Author” theme, while using this whole quest to explore Shen Yuan, Shen Yuan and Shang Qinghua, Shang Qinghua and Liu Qingge and Luo Fanli, and so on.
The idea here with the door is that the “author” is not going to let them inside the temple to take the interpretation of the narrative (the Eye) for themselves. The story is over (the temple is closed for business)! The author is dead! If they want to get inside, they have to break inside or slip inside as intruders.
This also creates a convenient obstacle to hold up the Huan Hua Palace Sect cultivators so that our party can be nearly caught later! And shows off Shang Qinghua, Liu Qingge, and Luo Fanli’s twisty lines of thinking.
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Luo Fanli is holding the light and Shang Qinghua passes the other transmigrator to her, while accepting Liu Qingge’s hand for help getting out of the water.
“Ahhh, that was fun,” Shang Qinghua mutters.
Then he notices that Liu Qingge has the Cheng Luan sword out and ready. Shang Qinghua looks through the surrounding darkness, but all he can see are columns and water. For a moment, he thinks he sees something, a prowling shadow at the other end of the cavernous room, but he wipes the water out of his eyes and it’s gone.
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AN: The water in Shang Qinghua’s eyes briefly lets him see a flash of the invisible monsters who show up later! It helps up the tension.
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Another low growl rips through the darkness and Peerless Cucumber shuffles a little closer to Shang Qinghua. Because that sounded really fucking close and yet Shang Qinghua still can’t see the thing that’s making that sound.
He doesn’t see Liu Qingge lunge at him either. He only feels his brother-in-law shove him into Peerless Cucumber, knocking them into the water, out of the way of something that howls when Liu Qingge slashes at it with his sword. Shang Qinghua rolls off Peerless Cucumber and looks up just in time to see dark blood splatter across the watery floor. Liu Qingge pursues the attacker with a second slash, but only seems to meet thin air this time.
“It’s invisible!” Luo Fanli cries. “Fuck!”
“Behind you!” Liu Qingge snaps, and spins to slash at the thin air beside him. Dark droplets of blood hit the water again and something hisses at him.
Luo Fanli whirls and slashes, searching for an opponent.
“They’re reflected in the water!” Liu Qingge yells at her, standing guard over Shang Qinghua as he gets to his feet again. “Listen for their footsteps and vocalizations! Feel the demonic energy and air displacement!”
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AN: I got this from a list of Dungeons and Dragons puzzles. The idea is that there’s some puzzle that must be solved, but the truth of the room can only be seen in the reflection of the nearby water (or mirror or whatever).
Which felt fitting for a “Death of the Author” quest! Whatever an author’s intentions, the story is what they actually wrote, so the audience interprets a text without the context of the author’s insight. The truth (of the story) is in the reflection (audience interpretation)! It felt like a fun idea.
It also allows Shen Yuan to actually contribute to the quest via monster lore and bring up his impaired vision problem. And to confront Shen Yuan with the reality of this world. And to show off Luo Fanli’s fighting skills. And to show off LIU QINGGE’S legendary fighting skills, instincts as a warrior who fights many dangerous beasts, and the fact that he’s clever and observant!
Liu Qingge is good at what he does! And this is what he does!
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Someone has… angrily… or desperately… carved a lopsided message into the wall.
“‘If I go blind, so does the world,’” Peerless Cucumber reads.
“...That’s probably not good,” Shang Qinghua says.
“Nooo…” Fanli agrees.
The messages continue as they climb, carved into the walls, the ceilings, the floors. Most of it is illegible. Some of it is just nonsense. Some of it looks like the same kind of historical records carved into the broken tablets. Some of it looks like someone attacked the walls after reading what was written there. There are deep gouges in the walls and cracked marks that would match a giant’s hands.
“‘The water cleans the lies,’” Peerless Cucumber reads. “‘I am the only one who can see.’ ‘Lies everywhere, lies everywhere, lies everywhere.’ ‘The water cleans the evil.’ ‘I do not have enough tears.’ ‘Everything is nothing now. Everything in vain.’”
“You really don’t need to read them!” Shang Qinghua tells the kid. “It’s fine. It's totally fine.”
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AN: This is mostly here to up the tension, but it’s also here to try and give insight into this being and relate them more to the “Death of the Author” and the “Seeing is Believing” themes.
I also saw the phrase “If I go blind, so does the world” while I was browsing a list of riddles for D&D campaigns and I was like, “THAT’S SICK, I’M USING THAT.” Really brings the “an eye for an eye” and vengeance vibes. (The riddle was longer than that one phrase, but the answer was “the sun”.)
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The top of the temple reveals one massive room that looks like someone was alternatively scratching their insanity into the walls and tearing chunks out of the interior design with their bare hands. Overtop of the rubble is that eerie overgrowth. There’s a fine layer of water over the floor. At the center of it all is an incredibly enormous desk, cracked in half, with a robed skeleton sitting behind it, slumped over the top. It’s a little too large to be an ordinary human.
Plus, its skull is a little too long, probably to accommodate the third eye socket in the forehead. There’s something gleaming softly yellow in the third eye socket.
“Is… there water dripping from its eyes?” Luo Fanli whispers.
“It looks like it…” Peerless Cucumber whispers back. “Like it's crying…?”
“Still…? Is it dead or not?”
“Holy shit,” Shang Qinghua thinks, slightly nauseated. “System, bro, the worst bro I’ve ever known, tell me that we have not been swimming in a three-eyed skeleton’s magical undead tears or something this whole time.”
The shitty, no-good System stays unsurprisingly silent.
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AN: Okay, so the idea here is that this being was someone who recorded history and shared their knowledge freely. This being had the ability to discern the truth of a person - they were extremely perceptive. (The Weeper is either female or doesn’t have a gender, by the way.)
The Weeper met the Garden Master at some point. The Garden Master was an asshole, a liar, arrogant, etc.. The Weeper and the Garden Master clashed badly, until the Weeper sent the cleansing flood that nearly destroyed the sect and the Garden Master essentially had to flee to a personal abyss.
The Garden Master sent the plant as a final “fuck you” to the Weeper. The plant caused the Weeper to slowly go mad. The smashed tablets and destroyed temple are the Weeper’s work. The Weeper (not in a great state of mind) had the temple closed themselves once they realized they and their work had been corrupted. This was a “you destroy my (embellished) reputation, I destroy yours (and your entire life)” plot by the Garden Master.
The idea behind the tears is the whole “water is cleansing” thing. The Weeper tried to clean away the madness using their magical water-related abilities... and it actually worked for a long time. But eventually the madness began to overpower the effects of the magical water. The Weeper’s tears are from frustration and helplessness at losing control.
The water inside the temple combats the plant’s physical effects. Also stabbing the root killed the plant and essentially broke its mental/spiritual powers.
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Unfortunately, to get the fuck out of here, they have to go back through the temple. But hey! That’s still a lot better than an extended hike through an underground, haunted desert in darkness! The battle with the now-dead plant caused its growth to writhe around the temple. The vines need to be hacked through sometimes as they travel down through the rooms of broken shelves and shattered tablets.
“So much history lost…” Peerless Cucumber murmurs.
“He still thinks of himself as a reader - an observer, a visitor, separate from the flow of fate.”
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AN: This is... absolutely based on the Heart from the Dishonored franchise. But this sort of item didn’t originate with Dishonored and I need it! It’s a surprise/mystery tool that will help us later!
The Eye isn’t exactly a mind-reading object. I mean, it kind of is, but it works in a very specific way that I’m looking forward to getting into.
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From there, their path back out of the natural maze is even more careful and stressful than before, now that the Huan Hua Palace Sect cultivators are actively looking for them rather than the temple. It’s slow-going and stressful and silent, except for when the Weeper’s Eye presses too close against his chest.
“He is afraid that if he starts screaming, he will never stop,” it tells him, when he’s looking at a pale-faced Peerless Cucumber, as they fly over a particularly deathly-looking drop.
“Oh, me too, bro!” Shang Qinghua thinks. “Seriously! Tell me something I don’t know!”
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AN: Having Shang Qinghua be totally unimpressed by an object like this was very funny to me. He’s the author! He’s a transmigrator! He knows these people well! He already has insight into their situations.
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Shang Qinghua groans, but supposes that Peerless Cucumber would have at least been disguising Liu Qingge from the back. “You tell them that you were tracking thieves who stole something from Cang Qiong Mountain Sect,” he says quickly. “Rule of embarrassment! Admitting something that makes us look bad to a rival makes it sound true. Don’t tell them what was stolen and act really offended if they try to poke into Cang Qiong business. I’ll come back as soon as I get these two out!”
Liu Qingge nods and launches forward into the fight.
“We’re just leaving him?” Peerless Cucumber says, as they do exactly that.
“I’ll get changed and come back ‘looking for him for urgent sect business’ as soon as I’ve dropped you two off in the last town,” Shang Qinghua says. “I’m really good at acting stressed and confused, and at desperately needing an unstoppable wandering Liu Qingge back at Cang Qiong Mountain Sect immediately. Now let’s go! Let’s go! Mission isn’t over yet!”
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AN: Shang Qinghua is, at heart, a liar. I love him.
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Since it popped up on the Podcast, how would you rank the sibling dynamics from healthy to trainwreck?
This is an innocent-sounding question until you go over the franchise and realize just how many sibling relationships there are in Digimon and that all but like three of them have elements that might raise eyebrows. In the interest of being comprehensive, this includes all named characters in any anime, manga, and game I’m familiar with, treating the reboot separately and including Survive because... (looks at Kaito and Miu’s bios) ...holy crap.
Sibling Relationship Rankings! (Healthy is Higher)
Joe & Shin Kido (Adventure): Shin understands Joe’s hang-ups and offers support to make his own choices without steering him in any specific direction, for or against the family. And Shuu exists too (depending on the language you’re watching in)
Juri & Masahiko Kato (Tamers): For all of the awkwardness and potential points of fracture in the family, Juri and Masahiko are very close. Fun Fact: She started carrying around her iconic hand puppet to amuse and entertain him!
Keito & Nozomi Tamada (Re:Arise): Even with very different personalities, Keito and Nozomi have a lot of respect for each other. Unlike some big brothers, he comes to a mature conclusion when he realizes she’ll be just fine with Pumpmon at her side.
Yamato Ishida & Takeru Takaishi (Adventure 2020): Yamato’s worry over Takeru only affects his reluctance to take on time-consuming side quests when he might be in danger. Far more chill about trusting Takeru with the rest of the team, he’s a motivation rather than a mental handicap.
Masaru & Chika Daimon (Savers): Perhaps a more controversial pick for the healthier side, but Masaru and Chika have a playful relationship that proves that Chika dishes out as much as anyone in the family. Given how much harm DATS and Digimon have done to the family, Masaru risks her love to keep them away from her.
Joe & Shin Kido (Adventure 2020): Shin’s still supportive and still encourages Joe to make choices for himself, but having that bugout bag ready to go raises some serious questions about that family and which side Shin’s really on.
Ai & Makoto (Tamers): Toddlers fight. It’s okay. They come together for Impmon’s sake and the fact that they’re the only duo in the franchise with mutual custody over a digivice has to say something about the strength of their relationship.
Nene & Kotone Amano (Xros Wars Manga): Nene’s tactics are still desperate but not quite as extreme as the anime, and it counts for so much that Kotone fights so hard for Nene once the tables are turned. And good lord that backstory...
Takuya & Shinya Kanbara (Frontier): There’s definitely a sense of Takuya lapsing into thinking Shinya encapsulates everything frustrating about having an older brother, but he gets over it.
Miyako Inoue + Three (Zero Two): Perfectly normal large household. And while wondering what it would be like to be an only child is something every youngest does... top of mind fantasy, Miyako? Really?
Jianliang & Shaochung Lee (Tamers): Speaking of four-packs... there’s no doubting how much they care about each other, but Jian’s occasional short fuse with Shaochung betrays his usual calm demeanor, and we never get a picture of the full family dynamic once Rinchei and Jaarin are included.
Daisuke & Jun Motomiya (Zero Two): Everyone likes to paint Jun and Daisuke as something uglier than it really is. As much as they annoy each other, it’s still a pretty conventional sibling dynamic and they’d still fight hard for the other... even if the feeling’s closer to obligation.
Koji Minamoto & Koichi Kimura (Frontier): There’s no questioning the bond they develop, but there’s no way Koji and Koichi go from “don’t know the other exists” to “ZOMG Twinzies!” without a ton of awkwardness and feeling each other out. They’ll get better, but from our standpoint this is where we start to drift into trainwreck territory.
Tomoki & Yutaka Himi (Frontier): Tomoki can spin it all he wants but Yutaka comes off as a real jerk. Not that some resentment isn’t a little justified given how much Tomoki is coddled, but taking it upon himself to be the bearer of tough love is still not cool.
Taichi & Hikari Yagami (Adventure 2020): Hikari has a blind faith that Taichi can save the day in any circumstance, up to and including international shipping crisis. Meanwhile Taichi sees Hikari lapsing between typical friendly eight year old to brainwashed robot and doesn’t find any problem with it.
Yamato Ishida & Takeru Takaishi (Adventure): Lessons in how not to be an overprotective big brother. Yamato freaks out at the slightest notion that Takeru might be exposed to danger, including his very presence in the Digital World. When you have a complete nervous breakdown realizing that little bro’s actually pretty capable on his own, it’s not about your relationship with him anymore.
Touma & Relena Norstein (Savers): There’s caring about a little sister, making her plight a central cause in your life, and then involving her in a chess match with a madman. There’s a lot to forgive here (they are raised in a family where your kneejerk reaction to Grandma is “I bet she supported the Nazis in World War II”), but everything about their relationship just makes you uncomfortable.
Kaito & Miu Shinonome (Survive): Maybe it’s not fair since their game is the franchise’s unicorn, but their bios have warning flags all over it. He’s overprotective, ready to fight at the slightest hardship, and she repays this attitude by being rebellious and weird and eager to pursue trouble. May end up being worse once the game actually comes out.
Rei & Hajime Katsura (Appmon): Another one where their backstory makes you sympathize with the lengths they go to in order to stay together, but risking the security of actual guardians to go it alone? Jesus. Even with their ride or die attitude, you still sense a bit of friction in their relationship, and so many of their hardships are their own doing.
Nene & Yuu Amano (Xros Wars): There’s nothing seemingly wrong on the surface between Nene and Yuu, but that’s why their actions are so extreme. Yuu’s more than happy to treat her as an enemy general in his game, while Nene’s aligning herself with dark forces and causing real trouble to get him back. It’s all very loud and intense for a relationship that, without external influences, is just nice and cordial.
Yuuko & Yuugo Kamishiro (Cyber Sleuth): You can be anything you want on the internet! So why not take the identify of your big brother who was stricken with a mystery illness at a young age and lead a legion of hackers? And if you’re Yuugo, use your digital body to take control of that avatar! Nothing weird about any of this!
Ken & Osamu Ichijouji (Zero Two): Like Tomoki, Ken can come up with whatever rationale for Osamu’s abuse he wants, and Osamu at least had some kind moments, but there’s no denying that this family was a mess. And of course Ken’s reaction to Osamu’s death... could have been better.
Taichi & Hikari Yagami (Adventure): Hikari’s introduction to the series was intended to be a little creepy, and that just sets the tone. Her blind loyalty to Taichi is a primary point of emphasis through three series, and Taichi sometimes goes ballistic worrying about her... when not accidentally endangering her life. And that’s before she unleashes a world-destroying abomination at the mere suggestion that Taichi’s dead, and why telling him “what you’re doing is wrong and I kind of hate you for it” is a big moment for her, even though she’s wrong.
Neo & Rei Saiba (V-Tamer): There’s going a little overboard to keep your family together or save a sibling’s life, and then there’s aligning yourself with evil forces to avoid having to deal with your sister’s manageable disability. Call it being jaded or delusional, but when it drives your sister to attempt suicide there are definitely issues you two need to work through.
Erika & Ryuji Mishima (Cyber Sleuth Hackers Memory): Because aligning oneself with Arkadimon is always a fantastic idea. He’s overprotective, she manipulates him because of it, there’s resentment, there’s anger, and basically the entire game is spent watching these two outdo each other in terms of causing wanton destruction throughout the city and cyberspace.
Honorable Mention: Bagramon & DarkKnightmon (Xros Wars): The battle of who can stab the other in the back last.
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Hey hi your murder mystery art is super totally cool and amazing and I'd like to Extra! Extra! hear all about it *rattles bells*
haha wow i cant believe ud ask me THIS! unbelievable! now im gonna have to make a long post!
all info under the cut cause im kind like that ♥
For reasons I felt like making a Fancy Ass murder mystery story, with you know, hella complex secret storylines and everyone having drama and shit, and one person died but the more the story goes the less people care about who did the murder and the more they want tHE JUICY DETAILs. X and Y had an afFAIR you say!!! well that’s thousands time more interesting than that murder that happened, who cares about the culprit its not like any of us are going anywhere anyway! tell me more about the marital issues!
The ultimate Vibes are Clue (the game, ya kno, it had a movie too, and that movie was shot with three different endings -fun fact- so that movie theatres could play one alternatively that way people wouldnt get spoiled or even if they did they would not get the ending they were spoiled or even if all three were spoiled you couldnt know which ending you were getting anyway, big dick move, cause its an old movie and film is expensive, also that movie stupid and campy, ALSO I ONLY LEARNED MAKING THIS AU THAT IN ENGLISH THE GAME’S CALLED “CLUE” wE CALL IT CLUEDO therefore my wip playlist is called cluedo. because. fuck it.)(i just have an emotional attachment to that game i even had a cd rom video game version and it was the spookiest shit for a 6 years old, trust me, i played it so much tho i didnt even understand the rULES i was just making scenarios like gathering the characters in rooms n making conversations outloud cause honestly the banter is the best part of a murder mystery) ANYWAY that sure is a whole paragraph of tangent.
BUT YE the inspo from the Clue game. you can tell it from the Colours obviously, everyone’s colour codded.(even everyone’s name is colours as well you’ll see it’s real dang fancy! im just remaking that game but with 2932020 characters and more behind the scenes drama and also for gay people.)
So BASIC PLOT!
Sir Belyy, the dude in white, is The Rich Powerful Respected Fancy Boss, and he throws a Fancy Reception Party with his closest friends and associates to celebrate the opening of a new branch of his business. All the lads gather in his wonderful little very isolated mansion in the middle of nowhere, like ok he got a death wish or something or he’s very trusting of his business partners, but not a good move, cause in the middle of the reception, as A Phat Storm Starts (for plot convenience, we going with a campy vibe if you couldnt tell), his body is found, it’s awful, there’s a killer on the loose! All the guests gather, and attempt to maybe contact the authorities, to not avail, since The Storm ya know, phone lines are Broken my dude. Its clear that the culprit is among them, since no one could have entered the house, or left it (cuz once again, ThE sTORm). And then it’s all about interrogating each other, distrust, alliances and betrayal, revealing one’s deepest secrets when they form an alibi and revealing someone else’s deepest secret for they could be a motive! Meanwhile there’s a dead body in the mansion just chillin there.
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So as I mentioned, I changed everyone’s name to be colour related (or ya know, food or flowers of that colour cause sometimes a colour in a language would not work as a name given the way names work in that culture all that jazz) which is the trippiest thing cause tHATS NOT YALLS USUAL NAMES but its fun (also changed so many ages hgfhs it was a trip)(still no one’s really old i guess i got boomerphobia). The “Cast” is clearly the most important part, and if ur a True “My OCs” Connaisseur (hdfghd the most useful skill to have, knowing *MY* Charactersdshgd) you may have recognised some faces and can already read some vibes and predict who will be progressing the plot and who will be yelling at people throwing accusations ghdfgd.
(god i wish i hadnt slacked off making the portraits of everyone in that AU i only have 3 tho that’s so sad so ill just make little sketches just cause <3 only text??? i got too many hoes with no attention span for that)
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Sir BELYY (the one who dIEs lmao)
(bust shot missing the fact that this man is the tallest beefiest lad around)
Intimidating, powerful, composed, wealthy, carries the name of a family who has generations of control to it’s reputation, he’s The Man that hoes who believe in the economy wishes they were. As in, the “self made” man who only just happened to benefit from having a wealthy background to uplift his plans. In his youth, he wanted to prove his worth, seperated himself from his father, started a business, that business became big, then got attached to the family’s business, bam back to square one but with Reputation now. There seemed to be VERY big tension between him and The Father, some speculate it had to do with his unknown mother, and some family drama there, and it never got resolved as old man Belyy died quite young (the jUICY speculations are that current sir Belyy mURDEREd old man sir Belyy, fucked up if true!). People love him though in general, as he has that reputation of “Cold Lad With a Gold Heart” aka he takes people under his wings, donates, doesnt treat his employees like the absolute worst garbage etc... you know, he’s rich and a half decent person, so obviously he’s an angel on earth. But does it matter though, he’s dead! that’s the concept of the story!
Mr.GRAY (the grey guest)(who could have guessed from the name)
He’s one of Sir Belyy’s oldest employees, and benefits from a high rank in the company. But, sadly for him, he’s been stagnating lately, as newer, youngest employees seem to have Belyy’s favours, and are his prefered associates for important tasks and positions. Therefore he has Some Bitterness, Some Salt, Some Distaste, some unbriddled but professionally muted hatred for Specific people in the company. He can be an antagonistic figure, but the amount of time he spent in Belyy’s circle grants him an immense quantity of information about the man, but mostly, about his business. Anything about the company’s history, dealings, operations, he’s aware of, either having been told of them, or having snooped around to obtain, immune to being questioned due to his legitimacy in the company.
Mr.LIM (the green guest)
Remember when it was said that Gray had beef with some employees cause they were younger and rose to high ranks faster than him and became Belyy’s favourite over him? Yeah well here comes the one he hates the most for that (ofc he’s belyys fave cuz he’s Mine <3) Our lad caught Belyy’s attention for his Exploits in like, em fancy high school tournaments of smart people, it’s a thing its ridiculous, making kids compete on Smart stuff for the pride of their schools n shit, well homie Lim got clout when doing that, and Belyy was extremely interested cause that kid’s main thing was how “this young lad got mad strategic skills tf are u a war general or smth how fancy”, and that’s a coveted skill for ruthless business. So as soon as the kid is an adult, bam, join the company my dude. And because he’s just that Cool n Sexy ofc he met the expectations Belyy had, and old man Belyy got attached cuz it do be such a young lad, a kid, mentally i am adopting. That’s how you get a youngas employee becoming the right hand man of one the phatest CEO in a few years, and even make your way into being a Good Lad on top of a business partner. And that’s how you get Gray to hate your ass too. Now though, fine lad with mad strategic skills, rising to power that fast, and even infiltrating Belyy’s private life? If I were Gray I’d call suspicion there’s surely some shady stuff going no way we’re just dealing with a nice fella who just happens to work good and be friendly to the boss right?
Herra MUSTA (the black “guest”)
Belyy’s newest butler, assistant, house keeper, he multitasks. His family has been tied to Belyy’s for generations, fullfilling roles of help, but also of confidents. He’s been the head butler since only a short time, after his mother passed, and as such is still “in training” you could say, despite having served the family his whole life. There are rumours going around that the contract tying his family to the Belyys may end on his generation and need to be resigned. He known the manor by heart, and carries all keys to any locked room (and mostly, The Master Key, cause in an old house, some doors may be locked beyond all still existing keys). He also knows secrets of the family that no one else knows, but good luck getting em out of him, he’s under contract not to divulge em bro.
Mr. HASSEL (the brown guest)
Belyy’s childhood friend. They grew up together, pictured their dreams together, sworn to flourish together, worked together when starting the company, and then Hassel felt he should create his own thing instead of depending on his friend’s existing wealth, and while Belyy’s business went wild, his never took off. They still stayed very close, despite the massive difference in wealth. Belyy considers him his closest friend, the one person he can trust (fucked if hassel did the murder lemme tell u). So of course, he’s still always invited to the Prestigious meet ups where’s he’s free to feel uncomfortably out of place amongst all the rich and powerful people that he could have been a part of had he had a tiny bit of luck and a small loan from a wealthy relative...People LOVE saying he’s still hanging out with Belyy so much to leech off his wealth, cause of course they do! His bestie status means he has a whole different brand of information of Belyy than his butler does, the Most Intimate Stuff, the Childhood Stuff. The Juicy stuff ya kno...But Bro Code, its all secrets...
Sir RUZH (the red “guest”)
Deep dive into Belyy’s personnal history, the man has many employees working at his house keeping it working, clean, ya know the vibe. They live on the premice, one has a kid who’s just a Joy to be around, all the employees just vibe with that lad, he’s just a born socialite you know? Belyy gets to meet the kid, and also hella vibes with him. And because human are influenced by their feelings, he gives the kid’s mum a bit of a preferencial treatment, in the tasks she fullfils and all, til he gives her an important-as mission, and then there’s an accident n mama dies, and now Belyy got guilt and there’s this kid who just Vibes. So naturally the move is to take the kid in, and play on how his vibes are just so clean, and raise him to be the Perfect Entertainer for guests, bam, its soft power propaganda, if everyone loves your now son’s vibes, they associate them with you too. And also that’s kind of a clean rep, the selfless man who adopted his employee’s son to not have him fall to the streets, how heartwarming. Not at all traumatising for the kid too I bet! But anyway now the lad is just the most charming young adult, mission accomplished. He’s always present at any reception, ready to work his people-pleasing magic, and then going back to a gigantic empty manor to wait for the next and curate the perfect vibes to meet the expectations of dad. On the plus side, he knows everyone, and those who don’t know him cannot wAIT to, he’s just got that aura ya know. People skills for miles, and the insider knowledge that comes with being the son of the CEO, all this hidden behind the personna of the fresh innocent bashful party lad.
Dr.FEN (the pink guest)
Do not get mistaken by the title, he’s no doc, he will not diagnose you with anything, he just studied long enough to get the sexy title. Study in what? Haha. Nothing shady. Just toxicology. He’s a world reknown poison expert basically, that’s his main thing. Oh but don’t worry, of course studying substances that may kill people is only for finding out how to cure them from it of course. What brings him in this circle? Simple, Belyy may or may not have started to suffer some weird illness that no doctor has been able to find the source, let alone cure, of. Him and Dr.Fen had met previously on some event, cause some rich man also love flexing how smart they are and attending sciencey shit, and he was contacted as sort of a shot in the dark. The lad does know how to treat some things, maybe he can treat The Mysterious Unwellness, since no traditional doctor was able to. He knows science, he’s trustworthy, bam, you’re hired to work on My Case Exclusively. Thanks to this, Dr.Fen has access to the whole health history of Belyy and his family, to many mANY dangerous substances, and also has The Respect of the hoes at the party. He HAS a doctorate after all. Epitome of knowledge. And he’s a kind to people and he wears pink like dang how can you nOT pour your wHOLE trust in him.
Sir MOREVITCH (the blue guest)
Youngest son of an affluent family, who used to be close the the Belyys. The two families fell slightly appart after the death of the previous head of the family on the Belyy side, as they do nOT vibe with the current one (well current, til the first night of the story ig). But, unbeknownst to all, one strong link had been kept, between the youngest of the Morevitch, who dislikes his family and wishes to emancipate himself from them while also assuring his depart will not throw him basically in the streets, and our beloved Sir Belyy, who also dislikes the Morevitches but loves to see the rebellious energy of the young one (and ya know, my enemy’s enemy’s my friend or however you say that). So Belyy’s basically offering tips and helping Morevitch plant himself safely out of his family’s grasp, but it’s all taking quite some time isn’t it, slow and steady is fine until your parents try to arrange a wedding to secure more political power, and suddenly it is all quite urgent that you escape that situation because No Thank You Parents I Do Not Want A Wife I’m Too Young And Also Huh <3 Stuff You Won’t Like Hearing For Sure <3. The people who know they’re working together also know that it’s a big point of argument between them, the difference in vision between “you have to go slow and steady to be safe” and “I have very limited time to get to that safety anyway so I gotta risk it” “hell no you cant i can’t follow through if we’re going that quick that’ll put me at risk and you’re family’s gonna send gunmen to take me down”. A mess, it’d be much quicker to just obtain a few million bucks out of nowhere and bolt for sure...
Mr.GANG (the orange guest)
Morevitch’s trusted assistant. He hears the concerns, he helps the secret businesses, he lies to the parents about the whereabouts, and mostly, he’s basically a budget spy. The lad got that talent where people just don’t notice him popping behind them and catching all their dirty laundry as they confess it to someone they trust, and he always manages to break into places, get the intel he was looking for, and escape, putting everything back into place as if no one was ever there (wonder where he got all those skills from damn!). But what he’s even better at is being sneaky not only to benefit his boss, but himself as well <3. If he can catch all the info in the world, go any places, nothing’s stopping him from playing double agent and also going behind Morevitch’s back. After all the assistant life isn’t the most glamourous and rewarding, who can blame him from going and using his talents to build his own little exit route, right? Everybody sort of knows he cannot be trusted, but also no one managed to really incriminate or stop him, and as much as he has tea on many people, no has it on him, but bet once found that would be heeeella juicy.
M.MOUTARDE (the yellow guest)(this one is straight up the name of the yellow player in the french edition of clue too when i say its my main vibe)
Moutarde was an influential celebrity. He had a big break acting in a movie that the whole country stanned so hard they basically turned the script into their national anthem (they would have if it was a true democracy where the people really decide), he was so handsome and elegant, everyone’s dream husband. And then the fame fiddled out because it’s how fame is, one moment you’re the sexiest dish on the table and the next someone brings in dessert and baam, its all about that fresh cake, and no one pays any mind to your delightful aroma anymore, you’ve gone cold, they had a bite, their interest is somewhere else. Belyy really admires his work though, and mostly finds his image fits with the brand of his company, therefore the two are working on a collaboration to make Moutarde a representative. This WOULD boost Moutarde’s reputation, for his ads would be displayed on every imaginable surface of the country, and it would also benefit the company cause being represented by thAT sexy motherfucker? clearly that’s a deal. The freshness of the partnership means Moutarde is a newcomer in the guests, a fresh face, with no reputation, no relationships, no unfair biases against him. He’s just the new handsome charismatic lad with a squeaky clean image. Emphasis on “image”. After all, no one really knows anything of his background, right?
Kun.LAWENDER (the purple guest)
Private investigator, very useful to be around at a party it’s almost like it was expected there’d be a body to investigate, he’s a very close associate of Belyy, as there’s nothing more important to business than investigating the rivals and finding dirt on them to make them fall through infamy. He’s not exactly the PI who goes look for justice to be served, he’s just here for cash bro. He’s got intel on everyone, and will only let it out if offered the right thing in return (money, or sometimes other pieces of very secret intel, trade is good). Wouldn’t advise letting him and Gang team up tbh but they probably wouldnt, as Lawender is really more of a lone wolf player, going on his own for himself. The one thing that negates his usefulness as a PI on an accidental crime of scene is that even if he knew the whole truth of the event he would not spit it out unless he benefitted from saying it. He sure is a polarising lad, but at the same time, an untouchable one, he’s too knowledgeable to be taken down. Rather than sneaky, he’s extremely observant, noticing the tiniest details and engraving them in his memory, ready to be linked up to other details to deduct the big picture. He’s the upfront tea gathered basically (as opposed to Gang’s shadow tea gathering if you will, they are similar forces but using opposite methods)(also one of em got a licence n the other does not hAH).
~~~~
Now the secrets, all of em have them. One of em at least got the secret of having KILLED Belyy that’s that. But that’s to be kept for later (for if i ever use this story for more than daydream material gfhjgh) bet you can imagine what some of em may be just out of Knowing what i do, from having seen the characters in other contexts, or just because you’re a genius and reading the character profiles immediatly lit up the bulbs in your head forming the perfect theory, props to you, mad genius.
Honestly my thoughts are just how lit of a game that would be, you get to pick one hoe (maybe sum are locked til u find their secrets for juicy purposes) and you do your invetigation using your character’s perks and disadvantages, and maybe there could even be Multiple scenarios and outcomes, to spice it up, give replay value, i just think it’d be a game id spend hours on. tryin to get the spicy details of everyone’s life. walking around n digging through a rich man’s stuff, witnessing the drAMA of people fighting cause they’re locked in with a murderer and that’s stressful ngl. That or a long ass show @ netflix wanna give me a show maybe? give me hella budget we’re making it animated cause im too cultured for live action.
whatever i make of it though, i hope i can make this story Flourish, just so that i can lay down all those secret backstories i’ve written. i want the satisfaction of throwing out the craziest secret drama between character n seeing peeps loose their minds, it just is a tasty experience.
also i gotta say, i plug the hell out of Clue for an inspo but when i was building the basics of the story my mind immediatly went “oH MY GOD THE VIBES,, THE BACKSTABBING AND tEAMING UP and all,,, its The Genius, that one tv show where peeps have to do the wildest games that require strategy n they’re in that fancy set that looks like a rich ppl mansion oh god the vibes” so yeah, i rewatched the whole first two seasons cause they’re my faves and that had an impact if only minimal in the aesthetic.
Anyway hope that quick presentation gave you a lil taste of the story, and maybe,,,, got you curious,,, craving to learn more like you never did before (im exaggerating the only real question we all got is just “so who’s fuckin with whom then how many of yall secretly dating” this the real deal)
#doodlin every lad's face at one rly be like 'welcome to the cheekbone festival'#they got antti AND said at once like the cheekbonage is out of this world!#that's musta n gang btw#also every single time i draw cream (blue lad) im like 'i havent drawn u in ages' n it isnt#that i dont draw him much anymore#but that ive drawn only this bitch for months back in the days#him bein in this without his lover....criminal#cuz his boo wouldnt fit a murder mystery au like#hoes would find the corpse he'd just be like 'welp on that imma go to bed aight bye'#anyway u can tell which of my ocs i simp for v easely#like fr#they the ones i spend the longest drawfigfdj cuz i draw em n then go 'not hot enough do it again'#a struggle!#anyway the secret is that i prepares a motive AND an alibi for all of em#so that i can pick who murdered belyy at the last moment <3#its all abt the contextual clues on the scene of crime <3#none of the drama tells u anything its all for the treat of gossip <3#sad part of this project is how much ive planned n written yet i can barely tell anythin if i want to make it#n ive drawn nothingbhd#i hav a dari n a weiwei in their coloured clothes lookin handsome cuz ofc i do#im predictable i have faves#ask if they're in love in this one too take a fuckin guess#u rly think hoe going to his boss's house so much to see the ceo ???? HAH#the real question isnt if theyre smooshin we all kno that answer the question is if dad white suit knows thATs whats important#are yall secret lovers or is green boy climbing the ladder of the company cuz he's smashing the boss's son#who knows#i do i aint telling pay me
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Personal trikey plot headcanon:
Call me old fashioned or just a sucker for a slow, awkwardly dysfunctional descent into romance, but when it comes to my ideas of a semi realistic/workable ending for Mike and Trevor blows through like an icy wind on a warm summer afternoon, like you’ve walked around Costco and hit the fridge storage room, the customer one, you’re relieved to not be hot yet kinda upset at how opposite it is to the point you’ll hop around the doorway just to balance yourself out. That’s the premise of my headcanon. 2015 starts like any other at the De Santa household, brief morning arguments about Tracey’s life choices and her on/off flings with the college professors of all her classes, yes, ALL OF THEM, while she’s not flirting it up with Franklin since his wealth means he can chill at home with Chop and Lamar and the last thing he wants is to listen to L bitch all day about why he ain’t a 3 bit gangster yet so Frank hangs at their place to sit quietly by the pool next to his future daddy in law and not have to destroy his ears with music to drown out his besties moaning (All that time at the De Santa’s means he gets to know everybody and develop a crush on Tracey which eventually leads to babies and public screaming matches because she cannot live without drama or dick) . The money following the union depository heist (If we assume the timeline of the final few missions rounded off around mid to late 2014) has come through after being washed via Lester’s numerous amount of fronts (Usually it wouldn’t take more than maybe a week, three tops, but the millions they pulled obviously required extra people, extra roads to travel, extra everything) and the family are in the green once again, however, the lack of worry over money gives everyone time to reflect, to make important changes in themselves and their lifestyles, well, some of them, not all. As you can guess, the thrill of the chase being gone brings back Michael’s...issue, if you catch the drift and the deeper psychological reasons as to why create tension, release topics of conversation he never wanted to have ever again or prod using the longest of fucking sticks known to mankind. If it isn’t sex, it’s the lack of general affection between him and Amanda being incredibly evident, painfully so, to the point they might as well be brother and sister because no married couple hug like they do, no happy person in a semi working relationship wakes up eager to pull the covers and see just the indent of their partner (Unless you’re one of the rare types who have S/O’s and just like bed space in the morning). Anyway, the talk finally bubbles to the surface, that now is the best time to divorce as the kids are grown up and they have money again and everything is sorta settled already, it’s just packing their bags and heading out, which is how the tears start cus neither of them wanna push the button, neither wanna make it official or make that call you dread while knowing it’s the least painful option for everyone, even those you ain’t met yet. Michael gets himself a lil Vespucci condo (You know the ones with the cute bridge over the water), Amanda is given the house in the settlement and later sells it because she can’t deal with the memories and just moves into the hills (She buys one of the homes similar to Martin Madrazo’s but still close to the city), taking Tracey because no way is she living with Franklin just yet, and Jim sorta hovers, couch hopping because he’s having a rough time accepting his parents have broken up and work. He eventually bunks at Lamars and they become platonic love bros. Come September, Mike starts giving into the questions plaguing his sexuality and ditches the gentlemen club for Leather-Face’s (Popular gay bar based around leather clothing and a really poor choice of name given to it by the owners brother who loved horror movies and ironically died when a Pomeranian bit his leg and it got infected, leading to septic shock and heart explosion), seeing if his lack of ability to be fully intimate towards women stems from an underlying homosexuality which turns out to be less than helpful as despite his new love of boppy music and sparkly fishnet tops, the touch of a man that isn’t Trevor proves to be just as lacking, just as lonely as that of a woman, given a few exceptions (He can get a lil hard to nude mags but it’s sorta a fluctuating mood spectrum) which tend to be just even more confusing and gets him in trouble with anybody interested in him. Eventually, everything just comes to a semi climax when, with help from friends, Michael gives into his overall infatuations and comes out to Trevor, completely, asking for a date or “Hang out, but it can go ANYWHERE”, Trevs usual for just about anyone he meets ‘Insert cheap laugh here’. and gets understandably told to go fuck himself because why now and after all the pain he’s caused and blah blah Trevor’s hurt, this is opening wounds, big pity party for Mr Philips. It takes a good deal of arguing and crying to convince his buddy to trust him but after....a month? two perhaps, Trevor eases up and they have their first terrible attempt at romance in the form of a movie at the condo and some fancy ass wine too good for both their tastes, but it leads to a cute, disgusting, hella gay half smooch and some giggles, plus some deep convo that opens M up to a chance at second base but Trevor teases him with the whole “Going easy on you, since it’s your first time” and heads home, forcing M to scream into his pillow and call Amanda cus they besties now. Overall the headcanon is a slow progression into Mike realizing he’s somewhere on the mostly Aromantic/asexual spectrum with the exception of those he’s in love/obsessed with (Remember when Amanda said he got big balls when Brad tried to get her, it was mostly infatuation, Alpha dogging it) and being in love with Trevor, getting the life he tried to have before but properly this time, accepting himself and being sorta better but not really but also kinda. Yes I know “MICHAEL WOULD NEVER----” Really don’t care, Honey, my headcanon, don’t like it, the doors to your...’Looks around’---WHERE IS THE FUCKING DOOR!
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Kitten Peter! ch. 2
Go here for the plot bunny that started it all: clickbait
Go here for the actual first chapter I wrote for the plot bunny: more clickbait
Go here for the Ao3 link: how can there be even more clickbait
Okay, let’s start this. As with all the other stories, EVERYONE that comments on any of the parts, get’s automatically put down in the tags. If you don’t want to be tagged for this or future parts, (but still want to comment, in which case: bless you), just write “no tag, please.” Or contact me via messaging here. I completely understand if you want to keep your notifications as clear as possible.
Despite the many, many promises that he was not about to have a mental breakdown because his ex was coming back, Pepper had herded Tony (and Peter) out of the lab and into his living room. Then the fiery redhead had made him something to eat. A very poor attempt at fried vegetables with rice, that the billionaire had forced down his throat through pure will power. The woman was a great friend, a fantastic assistant and a marvelous CEO, but she could barely boil water.
Not that Tony would ever tell her that.
As he chewed his way through the mushy rice and cotton like broccoli (how did you even get vegetables to take on this kind of texture?), he couldn't help but envy Peter. The little kitten was happily munching on his chef cooked, kitty appropriate, fish dinner.
It had taken another hour after that to make the woman believe that he really was okay, before Pepper had finally left for the night. With the sudden absence of someone inquiring if he really was alright, Tony found himself asking the very same question.
Was he okay?
The feeling of tiny claws digging into his pant leg diverted his attention momentarily to the tiny brown kitten scrambling up into his lap.
"You realize these pants cost 900$, right? And here you are, poking them full of tiny holes and spreading your hair all over my general wardrobe."
Contrary to his words, he immediately scratched Peter's head once the kitten had made his way up and into his favorite spot.
"We are going to get some visitors tomorrow, Petey. This tower was actually not always this empty, you know? I mean besides the business departments and all the other S.I. staff."
Peter was apparently not finished with climbing his human, and proceeded to scale up the inventor's shirt. Tony kept a careful hand underneath his kitten, content to let Peter climb up on his own, but ready to catch him should he slip.
"They used to live here, you know? The Avengers. Earth's mightiest heroes. I was one of them. AM one of them, but you know this. You have seen my suit. I'm Iron Man, and therefore the best, right?"
Peter had made it up to Tony's chin and was rubbing his little body affectionately along his beard and cheek. Tony smiled.
"Right. Anyway, the rest of the team has been away for some time... I think they left about two weeks before I found you, and they are coming back tomorrow and I... I don't know how I feel about that."
He sighed deeply, as if finally admitting that part to himself, after having spent the last few hours denying any negative thoughts to Pepper.
Peter settled himself on his right shoulder and rubbed his head against the skin on his neck, letting out a tiny mewl that sounded almost prompting.
"It's not that I don't want them to come back. They are my friends, and I actually like having them around. Even Barton, and that guy is a menace, I tell you. If he tries kidnapping you into the vents, you go ahead and scratch up his stupid face, got it?"
He ran his fingers over Peter's small back, and the kitten started purring. Tony relaxed.
"You will like them. There is Rhodey, who is my best friend, actually. I met him in college and he... well, he has been looking out for me ever since. He is also an Air Force Colonel and probably the most level headed of all of us. He has a suit that is almost as cool as mine, but he buckled under the peer pressure and gave himself the moniker of Iron Patriot, which isn't even a fraction as cool as his previous 'War Machine'. Then there is Bruce, my science bro. He is the strongest Avenger and he might even be smarter than me, but we are not gonna tell him that. He also turns into a tall, green rage monster on occasion, but he is really just a big ol' marshmallow on the inside. Clint is our modern day version of Robin Hood, just without the stealing from the rich and giving to the poor thing. ... On second thought, scratch that. He always stole my fucking coffee and then drank it himself. As if he wasn't perfectly capable of brewing his own. So, yeah. Modern day Robin Hood with less altruistic intentions and only marginally better fashion sense. I'm not sure if Thor is on earth right now, so he might not make an appearance tomorrow. If he does, try not to climb him, okay? I know he is easily confused with a tree, and his stupid cape is probably a very big temptation for your little claws. But you just never know when that big lug decides to twirl his glorified hammer and light up like it's the fourth of July. And if Thor electrocutes my little Petey-Pie, I'm gonna blast his head off, Asgardian royalty or not. So we better avoid that and don't go climbing up any aliens, okay? Trust me, it's not worth it. His beard doesn't hold a candle to mine."
On cue, Peter rubbed his head against the billionaire's bearded chin, letting out a contented mewl.
"Natasha is a bit more difficult to describe. I'm pretty sure if Fury ever manages to clone her, he will jsut retire every other superhero and agent on the planet and fill all his mission teams with Black Widow clones and take over the world. ... Come to think of it, that's a very scary thought. Friday, remind me to hack into Shield later and see if they have any kind of cloning research in the works."
"Of course, boss."
Peter didn't startle anymore when Friday's disembodied voice sounded throughout the tower, but he had started batting his paw in the air whenever she spoke. Like he was waving hello. Tony thought it was precious.
"Anyway, Natasha is pretty badass, but I don't think you have anything to worry about. Just hit her with the eyes and she is gonna be a goner for sure."
He could actually picture Natasha stopping in the middle of kicking Clint's ass, just to give Peter a tummy rub. He would have to be vigilant from now on. He wouldn't put it past Barton and Romanoff to try and kidnap (catnap?) his little Petey. He was going to write an anti-kitty-napping code into Friday's mainframe.
"And that brings us to... to Steve."
His mood took a nose dive. There was the crux of the matter. Steve.
Peter, clever little kitty that he was, noticed the change in his human immediately, and bumped his head against Tony's cheek with a questioning meow.
"It's... complicated. Steve and I, we used to be in a relationship. Shoot, I haven't given you that particular talk yet, have I? So, when one mature cat really likes another mature cat, and they decide to have a bunch of little kittens together... wait, that's called a litter, right? Okay, so if these two cats really like each other, and are both of a consenting age, they might decide to have a litter of adorable little kittens together, you know, if one was in heat and it's like mating season... do cats have mating seasons? Actually, this comparison doesn't really work, because neither Steve nor I were trying to get each other pregnant... You know what? You are way too young for this kinda talk, mister."
He carefully took Peter into his hand and held the kitten in front of his face, so he could look directly into the big, round eyes.
"I do not want you getting any ideas of running off with any mangy, ruffian tom cat, or some little pussy hussy, that tries to lay their dirty, perverted paws on you, got it?"
Peter leaned over the rim of Tony's hand and licked him on the nose. Tony grinned.
"Okay. But we will be having a 'stranger, danger' talk later."
He then cradled the kitten in both hands and cuddled him into his chest.
"So, back to the Steve issue. We were together. As, in a relationship. All official like, with going on dates and pet names and everything. The media even had a ship name for us: Stony; which, not very original, but no one has ever accused mass media of originality, so what can you do. Anyway, Steve and I were a 'thing', and I thought we were a 'good thing', you know? I mean, we hadn't dropped the L-word yet, but we had been going steady for a pretty long time, and that was kinda a first for me, and... I liked it. Him. Us. Being an 'us' with Steve. And it was good. Comfortable. And then Barnes came back."
His hand stopped petting Peter at the memory, and the kitten softly tapped his paw against Tony's thumb. When Tony looked down, he once again couldn't stop the thought that Peter must somehow understand him, because right then, the little kitten was looking up at him with an almost too human expression of worry and sympathy. He smiled at him and resumed his petting.
"Long story short, Steve slept with Barnes and broke up with me. And, look, it's not like I don't have sympathy for the guy. The things Hydra did to him and made him do... Suddenly being free of all that and having your best friend there with you... And I understand Steve's side of things as well. Kinda. Those feelings he has for Barnes, they probably weren't anything new. But back in his time, same sex relationships weren't simply frowned upon, but downright illegal. Then there was the war and the serum and everything else... They probably never really had the time or opportunity to realize exactly what they felt for each other. And then suddenly Steve wakes up decades in the future; and everything is different and he gets put on this team of super idiots and there is fighting and aliens and more fighting and in the midst of all of this, there is the cultural shock of having just skipped like two whole generations..."
Tony had been thinking a lot about it, actually. He wasn't always honest with himself, and he wasn't always good with his emotions. It was something Rhodey had said to him a long time ago. That sometimes, in order to understand our own feelings, we had to understand the feelings of those around us.
And with Peter's calming influence, he had been thinking a lot about Barnes and Steve and himself and their relationships.
At first, fresh after the break up, Tony had just been angry. Hurt, too, but that was so much harder to face than the anger had been, and so he had settled on that instead.
After the team had left for the compound (and Tony understood that his personal relationship drama could not stand in the way of the Avengers availability for missions and their need to keep up their training regimen.), he had locked himself in his lab for three days, trying to tinker his anger and hurt away. Then Pepper had lost her patience with him and hauled the genius out of there and made him see a therapist and sleep and eat (not in that order, though).
Any protestations that he didn't need to see a shrink just because his boyfriend broke up with him, were waved away by the woman ("Someone taking care of your mental health has been long overdue.")
It hadn't helped. The therapist and the food and the sleep, non of it had helped and Tony just got angrier and angrier at his own inability to let it all fucking go. (He had missed his Iron Man suit, and being an active Avengers, but even Tony, as much as he hated to admit it, knew that he hadn't been in the right frame of mind for it)
But then had come that fateful night, where Tony had taken his therapists advice to take a peaceful, relaxing stroll around some neighborhood. It hadn't been peaceful, and it hadn't been relaxing, and Tony had been pissed all the more for it. And then he almost got shot by some two bit thug. But he didn't regret it one bit, because those were the circumstances that brought Peter into his life.
Ever since the little kitten had launched himself at Tony's almost murderer and saved the billionaire's life, things had started getting better. Having a tiny, fluffy creature to take care of and adore, had left Tony no time to dwell on his anger. Watching as the kitten explored his new home with too much enthusiasm and too little coordination, had made the man smile and laugh more in those first few days, than he had in weeks (months?).
Cuddling up with Peter anywhere and having the little fluffball purr up a storm, never failed to relax Tony and often lulled him into a deep, and thankfully dreamless, sleep. He quit going to his therapist and started taking Peter with him wherever he went. Pepper wasn't impressed the first time he showed up to a board meeting, with the kitten neatly tucked into his shirt's breast pocket. But she had quickly given in when she saw that Tony actually paid attention during the meeting, and was much more open to listening to the boards suggestions, while he was playing with Peter.
He talked to Peter all the time, about everything. S.I. business, new projects, what he thought about any particular book or movie, his robots, his suit, absolutely anything that came to mind. Aside from the Avengers. Until now.
"So, really, I get it. Those two are probably some kind of star-crossed, destined to be, once in a lifetime, lovers. And I don't even begrudge them finally being together. I just... I hate how it happened. I hate that Steve all but ignored me when Barnes came back from the dead. I hate that he slept with him while we were still an item. I hate that it made me feel like I had been a stand-in for Barnes all along. I hate that I have hardly talked to any of the team since they relocated to the compound. I hate-" He sighed. "I hate that I don't hate him. I kind of want to. I feel like that would be easier, you know?"
Peter just looked at him with his big, adorable eyes and laid his little paw on Tony's chest, right where the genius' heart was beating. Really, sometimes it felt like the kitten understood every word.
"I miss him, but not in the way one misses a significant other. I miss arguing about reading the newspaper on my tablet versus reading it on paper. I miss confusing him with pop culture references he doesn't know about. And I miss him getting on my case about spending too much time in the lab. But I'm not too hung up about all the couples' stuff. Not saying I didn't enjoy the se- wait, this isn't appropriate for young kitty ears. It's not like I didn't like our 'intimacy', but looking back on it now, I think Steve and I, we were always more of a 'friends with benefits' type of relationship, with more weight placed on the 'friends' part of the deal. Don't get me wrong, I'm still angry about Steve cheating on me like that, and how it all went down, but I think I can forgive him. I mean, obviously we will need to have it out, first. We didn't really get to the 'break up talk' before I pretty much kicked everyone out, and I guess that's partly on me. But, I want to forgive him. So, if Steve and I manage to clear the air between us, and all that sentimental stuff, ... yeah."
Peter had climbed back up to Tony's shoulder and lovingly rubbed his head against every part of his human's face he could reach. Tony laughed.
"Love you, too, Petey. You are the best kitten in the world, you know that? I will tell Vincent to make you something extra special for breakfast tomorrow."
Tony brought his hand up to massage his fingers into the soft fur, while Peter burrowed himself into the man's neck and purred until they both fell asleep.
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tbc
Okay, let me first say, I understand if people might be a bit confused over Tony's seemingly easy forgiveness here, but I hope I managed to portray that in this story, Tony and Steve's previous relationship isn't meant to be the main plot point. It's actually not even meant to be a particularly important plot point. The story's main plot is the relationship between Tony and Peter, and Peter being an adorable little ball of fluff. :-)
Also, I didn't want Tony to be completely broken up because things with Steve went south. Matter of fact is, romantic relationships sometimes don't last. They sometimes don't work out. And sometimes someone messes up. Steve cheated on Tony. That was a douche move, no question. But I didn't want to just bash his character. Steve didn't cheat on Tony because he didn't value him, or because he is just is a super asshole. These are very special circumstances, and things didn't go great, and Steve isn't perfect, and he messed up. But he didn't do it with malicious intent, and he is still a good guy, and he will try his best to repair the trust between him and Tony.
Tony is gonna get a bit of funny, petty revenge on Steve, though. With Peter's help, of course. ;-)
Sidenote: I would really like to know your opinion about Tony's aborted efforts to have 'The Talk', with kitty Peter. :-) :-) :-) I hope it was as funny to read, as it was to write!
Please tell me if tagging didn’t work, or if I forgot anyone!
TAGGING: @ theonemetorulethemalll @ sapphire-of-shield @ plueschpop @ deliciousflapbanditfarm @alanaaw88
#kitten!peter#peter is a kitten#kitty therapy#kitty daddy tony#kitty series#kitty!peter#tony stark#peter parker#could be seen as iron dad#kinda irondad#Avengers#fanfic#crack#cute#fluff#funny#mentions of cheating#past stony relationship#likely future ironstrange relationhip#op lurafita
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Feb 16th Hpcc recap part one!
So many covers! Lola!Myrtle, Tom Gilbey!Draco, Jim Fish! Harry, Lucy!Delphi, Rosie! Umbridge, Sinead!Polly, Duncan! Yann
Act one notes
You know it’s going to be a great show when the first note you’ve written is “I love Gordon’s jacket!”
Dombus has the most massive grin on his face at the prospect of being on the platform he’s just so full of utter delight to be there and it’s adorable
JSP kept whispering into lily lunas ear during Albus and Harrys scene on the platform 🥺🥺
JSP gave his mum a kiss on the cheek and then had some banter with his dad as he nearly ran into him
Fish! Harry had a right chuckle at the idea of Ginny being in slytherin
Scorpius is sat reading his book with such a grin on his face, he’s so into whatever he’s reading, he looks up to see Karl and tries to make a friend, has the second of heartbreak when he runs away and then heads back to his book, as if he completly expected to be treated like it :(
Throughout Scorpius explaining his parents, Albus keeps opening his mouth as if he wants to say something to him and make sure he’s okay, then on the “father son issues, I’ve got them” the recognition in Albus’s face is everything!!he sees himself in that line
During his sorting Scorpius was definitely murmuring something that looked a bit like “please” and then looked elated when he got into slytherin, Ronnie and Gordon were going mental jumping up and down to welcome him in
Karl ran right into Madam Hooch they proper smacked into each other and it was hilarious
Karl was jabbing Albus with his broom as he teased him
Karl getting signed on the platform by Harry let out the biggest shriek of EEEEEEEE
There was a big Potter bro play fight on the platform bless them
Yolly walked past as Draco was talking about the rumours and the nastiness of the hogwarts students, and Draco properly death stared at them, he was just so angry that the people at Hogwarts were so mean to his poor son.
Yann responded to this by screaming “AHHHH” and the pair of them ran away
Albus is so pleased with himself that he got incendio right, that boy just loves magic so much 🥺
The way Al says “of course” in response to “come to the funeral” is so utterly heartbreaking, he’s so sad for his best friend and sees it as a given that he’ll be there
At the start of wand dance Albus nearly got woooshed by the teachers spell bc he was so close
JSP was supportively shouting at Albus and slowing down to look out for him!
Lola!Ravenclaw girl was so happy she was the first one to get the spell “I did it! Ahahah!!” Whilst jumping up and down
Fish!Harry had such a wonderful dynamic with Hermione in the Office scene! They were bouncing off each other and constantly making the other laugh, after “it’ll go with the scar” Harry did the loudest “ HA HA HA HA”
For “no longer chaotic” he had the biggest grin on his face and put on his poshest voice whilst holding onto his wand at both ends.
Harry really seemed so invested in how Hugo was doing, he had the most genuine voice asking the question and reached his hand out across the table towards Hermione.
Ronnie cloak swished so hard bringing the table off that his hood went up
When Amos mentions Cedric Harrys face fell so much, he still feels so responsible and it destroys him
Lucy!Delphi very matter of factly went “I’m a theif” and did a cute little head tilt before pointing her wand at Albus aggressively
She’s so expressive it’s adorable and she constantly uses her hands
On the “once great Harry Potter” line fish!harry nodded very awkwardly, Harry was clearly so uncomfortable in the situation
Albus lights up when he sees his brother with pink hair and starts giggling, he has a puzzled look on his face when he sees the wings trying to figure out what they are but once he’s worked it out he just looks so happy because his sister is simply overjoyed by them and her happiness is infectious.
Fish!Harry gritted his teeth as if it was painful to think about his poor mum and clasped his hands together moving closer to Albus’s face to say “I think she would have wanted you to have it too”
“I used to LOVE packing” Harry is just desperate to find a way to chat to his son bless his heart and he sounded so enthusiastic about it but awkward at the same time
On *that* blanket scene line Harry punches his hand down, he was so angry, and then the regret of what he said started to crawl over his face and it was so painful, Albus sounds so broken on the “you meant it dad” his voice fully cracked
Craig as Dudley was absolutely hilarious today, he screamed “LOOK AT HIM” when he saw Hagrid and put his hands over his mouth and then fully fell over onto his stomach on the floor.
Dudley kept peering out from under the pillars of the staircase, whenever the word magic was mentioned Rosie!Petunia would cover his ears, when yer a wizard happened, Dudley stuck his head out as far as possible, and then Petunia stuck her arms out a bit too late and had to stretch super far to cover his ears
Fish as Harry seemed to me like he had all this hatred for Dumbledore, he said the line in the bedroom with ginny so sarcastically, as if he knew it was a fucked up thing for Dumbledore to say to a child
On the first train hug Scorpius flailed about but then tried to go back into the hug
The trolley witch missed JSPs compartment and he was very frustrated and distraught that she skipped him and was sort of aggressively waving out for her to come back
Albus tries to shove Scorpius up onto the train roof but gets fed up and goes first, Scorpius hurriedly follows after him, he doesn’t want to be left behind, and his legs were flailing about as he was getting up.
On the rebel line Scorpius did some jazz hands.
Scorpius is just so sweet and polite he tries to maintain eye contact and smile and nod along with what the trolley witch is saying even though she’s probs very terrifying to him at that point in time, what a good egg
In the EGM Susan was giggling so much at Draco’s sass and was absolutely living for the dramaaaa
Craig in St Oswalds was brilliant, “oh no” as he saw the old witches and wizards approaching and then “how are ya Susan? Did you enjoy Bessys birthday party?!” (At that point I died on the spot, I have the best friends ever for making that happen and now there is an offical character in CC canon named Bessy)
Albus tried to have a convo with Craig as he ran by in st Oswalds but there was just to much chaos
Scorpius always tries to protect Albus he keeps putting his arms around him to keep him safe, they stand so close to one another 🥺
“It’s going to be dangerous” “we know” Albus has the biggest grin on his face that boy loves the idea of an adventure
“I’ve heard it tastes of fish” Albus takes a big sniff trying to check it out for his friend and seeing if it does
Jons!Scorpius polyjuice transformations are just getting more and more extra and I live for themmmm, he was sticking his tounge out and fully shaking and going “vvvvvvvvvvdhdjdgyd”
Fish as Scorpius was incredible he had all of Jons mannerisms perfectly and was constantly giggling, especially at himself after telling Albus off he couldn’t stop laughing
Gilbey!Draco was nearly full on crying at “my soul heir” He remained steely and had such a front up for the start of the scene and then the vulnerability shone through :(
The search for hiding places was very dramatic, and then Fish!Scorp was pounding on the door like “LET ME IN” and Tom!Ron was like “ I CANT”
Tom!Albus’s fake vomit after kissing his aunt was wonderfully extra and then he started trying to wipe his mouth on his sleeves
Tom!Albus was completly starfished out over the door to stop hermione getting in!
He was looking desperately around for something to say before finishing with “A HOLIDAY” and then started to kiss Hermiones arms?! 10/10 flirt there
Fish!Harry walked past them both and jumped away like he was scared Ron was going to jump on him next
Fish!Scorp looks so upset about what Albus’s dad has said to him, he cares so much about Albus.
Fish!Scorp was so extra in the best way, “woahhhhhhh” *crouching down, flapping arms in the air*
One of my notes says “Fish crouched like spiderman.” So I’ll leave you all to imagine what that was like, he also at certain points looked like he was attempting the mobot
Fish kept throwing himself on the floor and crawled about then sat down in despair before getting sucked into the bookcase
Act Two
Fish!Harrys hand kept twitching in his sleep and he kept fiddling with his hands, is that where Albus gets it from?!
Lucy!Delphi did a finger gun on wizzo, and was being so encouraging to Albus with the expelliarmus. She stuck her hand up in the air to answer the question- she seems so incredibly dorky, a bit like the boys, you can see the hints of her manipulation how she plays up their traits in herself, to gain their trust
Scorpius speaks to Albus and only really to Al he just tries to ignore the fact that Delphi is also there
Delphi held the durmstrang robes above her head and then chucked them right in Scorpius’s face
The notes you’ve all been waiting for:
Bane.
Adrians neighs are more of a roarrrr than a neigh, they seem incredibly aggressive and quite frankly absolutely terrifying
Edge of the forest was so beautiful yesterday, it literally brought me to tears as soon as the boys emerged. Scorp just looked so happy, he was grinning and doing tiny giggles and even scrunching his nose up, and Albus was so desperate to let his friend know that he’s his best friend 🥺
Triwizard time!
Duncan tapped Ronnie on the shoulder and sent him off back to slytherin.
Craig started spelling out T W T with his hands to a bemused Lola
At least two attempts at a Mexican wave which were 60% successful?!
When Krum was mentioned Craig gave a big thumbs up to Scorp and Albus
Craug was down on his knees with his hands in the air proclaiming “I LOVE YOU FLEUR”’
Craig and Lola were being very sassy to the gryffindors at the mention of Harry, both making Ls with their hands and putting it to their foreheads at them
Ronnie got told off by Snape
“ITS THE DRAGON ITS THE DRAGON” - Lola bouncing up and down
Lola fainted at Cedric and then everyone started laughing whilst Ronnie pointed at her
Craig did his little high kick
Scorp fully throws himself at Albus after he’s hurt from the time turn he’s so scared that Al might be hurt :(
His voice cracked ok the “are you sure you’re okay?”
There seems to be this utter conflict in Fish!Harrys relationship with Dumbledore, he wants to be able to hate him for what he put him through but when the man is there in front of him he cracks, his “i missed you” sounded more like he missed him being around and missed speaking to him rather than like I’ve missed you at your portrait
Albus was sat crossed legged on the bed, and his legs were shaking when talking about hogwarts.
He’s so quick to rush in and defend Scorpius and is so upset that that’s how his dad sees him
When Albus is talking about Ron running a joke shop he’s grinning so hard like he’s reminiscing about all the fun he’s had at said joke shop
Fish!Harry was right up in Scorpius’s face when he walked past and then stood sassily waiting for Albus with his hand on hip.
Fish!Harry said the line “and he may not like me again” so incredibly sadly, it was such a contrast to the anger, he was just so devastated about the relationship with his son
During the whole DADA scene Lola and Craig were living for the gossip and kept turning to look at each other and then glare at Albus
In staircase ballet, Albus kept opening his mouth to try and say something, and did actually mouth a few words but I couldn’t make out what it was :(
Scorp always smiles at Albus whenever he sees him on the stairs, Scorpius still has that hope that maybe this time he won’t ignore him, when he’s sat on top of the stairs, and Albus runs through below him, he attempts to reach out through the gap and get to him.
The duel was so amazing, Fish and Gilbey have such an energy to them that is unmatched, Gilbey sassily sat on the table and went “tut tut tut” whilst shaking his finger, and on I wear it better, he reached out and licked his finger before stroking his hair.
When Ginny catches them Fish!Harry fries his best to look less suspicious
and sticks his hands behind his back and looks around the room trying not to meet his wife’s eye.
Delphi appeared so excited to be in hogwarts, she was fully trying to take everything in looking all around and imitating nearly headless nick sticking her neck out to the side.
She plays to his weaknesses so well, telling Scorpius she was ill as a child obviously evokes a lot of sympathy from him because of Astorias illness and it’s so easy to see how he was manipulated into trusting her since he sees his sickly mum in her.
Delphi is so fed up of Scorp not being able to see how much Albus needs him she was like “Scorpius NOoooOo” and rolled her eyes at the shoulder to cry on because he wasn’t getting it

During Dracos monologue He seemed like he was full on about to sob, he could barely say Astorias name without breaking down, his family is the one thing that can break down his icey barriers.
Mcgonagall fully starfished over the exit so that the boys wouldn’t be able to escape in the library scene.
When talking about Scorpius being kind from the tips of his fingers, Albus grabbed his own fingers to emphasis what he was trying to say
“That’s a nice thing to say” Scorpius reaches across and placed his hand on Albus’s knee
Scorpius came in very close to Albus as he said “I didn’t much like my life without you in it either” and his voice was all shaky like he was about to cry because he had missed his best friend so much
The new sparkly surprise was so cute, Albus lifted one hand as if it was a firework being launched into the sky, and then did three little firework explosions each complete with its own little pewwwww
When talking about making cedric larger, Albus lifted his arms out from him to mime something growing bigger
Lola!myrtle:
-> “do I moan?!” she spun her head around and kicked her legs up whilst pouting.
-> she leaned back and when talking about being partial to a Potter did a little upside down wave at a very taken a back Albus
-> C E D R I C D I G GORY - her way of saying cedric Diggory was absolutely hilarious
-> “waaaaaaaaaa” *albus rushes forward to say something else*
*does a very sassy stop right there hand motion*
“Excuse me, I’m crying” * returns back to wailing*
-> she waved Albus down the sink and then stuck her leg out across the top to prevent Scorpius from following him right away and stuck her face close to his whilst saying “I do like braveeeee boysssss”
-> the adults on their way in “uH oH” sticks hands over face like she’s playing peekaboo
-> she then proceeded to make kissing pouts at Harry
I love how in the lake Albus decides that although there’s a 5 min rule with the time turner he’s got plenty of time for a couple of underwater backflips
Scorpius is so elated when he gets out of the lake he’s so pleased he thinks everything is fixed so his first shout of Albus is all bubbly and then it slowly gets more and more panicked until he’s completely desperate and realises he’s all alone
Rosie!Umbridge put her hand on heart after mentioning Potters death, and then did some sassy hand on the hip action for “we bravely overthrew”
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How could allurance have been better developed so it would have become the most supported ship in the show?
I’m feeling super energetic tonight so I’m going to go write after this, but here’s a summary of what I think should have been done to make this better:
The AU where Allurance was better foreshadowed:
Season 1) Keep Lance’s flirting and Allura rejecting him, but give a slight glimpse of Allura looking somewhat frustrated that Lance is going off and flirting with Nyma or something. Also, give Lance and Allura a duo mission or training scene in which they work great together as team members, support each other as equals, and zero flirting happens. Somewhere in this scene, the fact that Lance likes Allura more than just as a passing thing should be brought up; maybe he asks her to dance at the party and when she rejects him, he plays it off in front of her but then shows the audience that he actually feels a bit hurt by it later. Something like that.
Season 2) Shit I forgot what episodes are in this season but I think Plaxum is in this season, right? I would have had Lance flustered about Plaxum’s behavior but also have a moment of him thinking about Allura and going “I already kind of… like someone else?” I would have added a scene of Lance talking to Allura one-on-one about the reveal of Keith’s background as a Galra, and have Lance listen to and respect her views, instead of everyone just shutting her down and acting like there’s no validity to her feelings. No flirting, just him being a good listener and helping her to talk through her anger and fear so that she can move forward and get back to seeing Keith as a friend. I think the episode where Allura and Keith run off together is in this one, so instead of Lance acting petty and jealous, have him genuinely worried for both Allura and Keith’s safety, and have him ask them to come back because it’s more important to face whatever is happening as a team than apart. When they come back, have Lance hug Allura in a non-romantic way, just as in an “I am so glad you’re safe” way. When Allura insists on going with Shiro to the Galra base and Coran tries to fight it, I would have had Lance start to agree with Coran, then stop and realize that no, he trusts and believes in Allura and this is something she needs to do. Also, sometime during this season, it needs to be implied that Allura has at least the starting of some interest in Lance, so that he doesn’t just look like a rebound later.
Season 3) Lance should have supported Allura for Black Paladin and explained that she had already been leading the team, so she is the most equipped to step in until they find Shiro. Personally, I would have skipped the entire clone!Shiro plot because it was pointless and unnecessary, and season three would have instead been spent searching for Shiro who would have been found or at least seen in episode cuts throughout this season, off on other planets hitching rides and helping out the locals. Instead of Lance supporting Keith in season three during the chase scene with Lotor, it would be Lance supporting Allura and telling her how much faith he has in her. I would add at least one scene in which Allura is frustrated with her slow progress with the Black Lion and confides her frustrations and her fear that she won’t live up to being the great leader that her father was (not a great paladin or great alchemist–Allura should have aimed to be a leader like her father). This could have been the watershed moment in which Lance finally got screen time to confess his fears and insecurities, which would have been properly listened to, respected, and addressed by Allura. The two could have reached meaningful mutual understanding, grown closer, and committed to working together not just to help save the world, but also to help each other grow as people. The idea of Allura and Lance being close friends and a TEAM should have been established by this season.
Also, after their meaningful talk, Allura should have had a moment of watching Lance walk away with a very fond look on her face, so that it could well-established that Allura had at least SOME feelings for Lance before Lotor came along. Shiro should have been reunited with the team at the end of season three, and Allura should have stepped down from the Black Lion only because she found it more useful for her to lead the coalition and correspond constantly with all their allies–i.e., she should have stepped into an even bigger leadership role (queen of like half the universe lol) at the end of this season.
Also, somewhere in this season, Allura should have given Lance the encouragement he needed to really break out and shine during at least one battle or scene, so that the viewers get the chance to see her supporting him in action and to see Lance growing in both skill and confidence.
Season 4) This could have been a season with little hints and nods here and there to Allura and Lance being great team members, closer and closer friends, and the first really obvious hints of the romance plot line coming in, although I think that Allura should have maybe gone a bit into the “oblivious to her real feelings” category so that it wouldn’t make her look heartless when the whole deal with Lotor suddenly popped up. Mostly the same this season but the Voltron Show should have, instead of poking fun at Lance’s “lover boy” stereotype, instead of poked fun of his being whipped for the princess and Lance should have been like “Coran, this is totally not realistic at all!” while Pidge and Hunk are in the background like “Hmmm, are you sure??” By the way, Keith never would have left with the Blades because that whole plot line was dumb, so instead he’s just in the background of all these Allura and Lance scenes rolling his eyes.
Season 5 and 6) The whole “Lance is petty and jealous” over Lotor would not have happened. Or, maybe he would have started it and then taken a big deep breath and realized verbally or mentally (for the audience to hear) that he’s being a defensive jerk and he needs to make take a step back from the situation. He would apologize to Allura for acting out and let her know that the real reason he was acting this way is that he’s worried about not just Voltron and the future, but also about her personally, that he doesn’t want her to get hurt, but that if allying with Lotor is what she thinks is the best decision, he’s always respected her as a leader and he’ll go along with her and support her no matter what. After this, THEN we could get the scene where he confesses to the mice (or geez, you know, like another human being? Because Lance does have friends he could talk to, because in this AU the team is actually… you know… a TEAM? Better–Lance confesses his deep feelings for Allura to Keith, who pulls a “That’s rough buddy,” Zuko moment for comedic effect, but then does genuinely try his best to be a supportive friend because hey, they could have solved the Klance drama by making Keith and Lance into bros who support each other as friends instead of playing them off as overly-invested rivals?) So, Lance has meaningful flashbacks to all the great times he spent with Allura throughout the series so far, and confesses his feelings, and this time the audience genuinely believes him and feels the pain of his (seemingly) unrequited feelings for Allura.
Meanwhile, we see Allura struggling as she gets closer to Lotor, weighed down by the fact that Lotor doesn’t have Lance’s trust… The series could have made a huge point here: Allura glomed on to Lotor because she thought he was a kindred spirit, someone who thought like her and valued the same things as her–only to realize that the person who respected, valued, and supported her and everything she stood was Lance, right beside her the whole time. Little differences in Lotor’s behavior versus Lance’s would have been the hints to Allura that something wasn’t right, even before the whole colony thing (which actually if I had a choice, I would get rid of–just make Lotor a well-intentioned extremist without reducing him to a Hitler stereotype, please), and when Allura realized that Lotor never truly supported and respected her the way Lance did (and, you know, that he’s still carrying out a plot that only benefits himself) would have been the defining moment where Team Sincline and Team Voltron had to part ways. In this way, we avoid the issue of Lance looking like a rebound–instead, it will look like Lotor was the misstep and Lance was the right choice all along. This could also have been the moment where Allura realizes that her feelings for Lance aren’t just friendship but actually romantic.
Season 7) I didn’t watch this season so I don’t know what happened, but I would have slowly unfolded the romantic plot throughout this season, ending with Allura and Lance just tentatively hinting to each other about their feelings–maybe a nervous hand hold right at the end of the season finale, and a cut to credits with them looking anxiously but hopefully at each other.
Season 8) Plot happens. Lance and Allura continue to be amazing teammates and supportive friends to each other. Their romance plot line isn’t the focus, but the other characters try to tease Lance about it a time or two; at least one joke episode is dedicated to Lance and Allura attempting to go on their first date but every single being in the universe somehow accidentally getting in their way. The series ends with Allura deciding to found the coalition’s central command on Earth, so that she can stay with Lance (and his family, because god, she’s so happy to have a full FAMILY again) and also still fulfill her duties as leader of essentially the known universe.
TADA. I’m not saying this is perfect but I feel like most seven or eight-year-olds could have written a better romance than what I saw of Allurance so far.
#allurance#voltron#allura#lance mcclain#voltron salt#allurance AU#HERE IS A FREE FIX-IT FIC PLOT#someone write it for me#allurance could have been fine#there's nothing wrong with the idea of it#just the terrible execution in the show itself
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Kiyotaka Ishimaru is Autistic - A Writeup
Hey there!
As you’ve probably guessed from the title, this is gonna be a pretty long post about Kiyotaka Ishimaru from the Dangan Ronpa series, and how I believe that he is autistic. Note that I am #actuallyautistic myself, so a lot of this is drawn from my own experiences of autism, as well as some common symptoms Kiyotaka displays. This is one of my personal favourite headcanons, because I relate to Kiyotaka a lot, and it’s nice to be able to relate to him on a neurological level as well. That being said, despite the evidence I’m going to cover in this writeup, it is still a headcanon- so of course you can feel free to disregard this if you don’t agree with me (just don’t come and fight about it on the post... because a lot of that tends to go into “autism is a bad thing” territory and as an autistic person it kinda makes me feel shitty).
With that out of the way, the rest of the post will be under a readmore, because this is about to get kinda long.
Kiyotaka Ishimaru is a fairly minor character when it comes to the Dangan Ronpa franchise. He’s a member of the cast of the first game, and dies halfway through, with almost no re-appearances or further mentions in the rest of the series. However, his personality is very distinct, and he’s been consistently seen as one of the most popular characters from the first game because of this.
Kiyotaka’s personality boils down to a few essential parts- his keen sense of justice and morals, his lack of social skills and social intelligence, his drive to be the best in his schoolwork, and his encouraging, yet strict nature towards his classmates. Just from this base analysis of his personality you can start seeing some autistic traits- namely in his idealization of morals and ethics, and his lack of general social skills. The former is so important to his character, it’s what gives him his talent- as the Ultimate Moral Compass (Disciplinary Committee Member in the Japanese version of the game, and Hall Monitor/Prefect in a few fan translations).
It’s quite common for autistic people to be unusually obsessed with justice or morality. I know from my own experiences that I absolutely hate situations I perceive as “unfair” or “unjust”- where I’ve been punished for doing things I didn’t do, when other people have been punished for things they didn’t do- I even find it hard to lie in certain situations. Kiyotaka certainly seems to display this pattern of thinking- his entire talent ties into making sure that those who do wrong are suitably punished, and those that do right are rewarded accordingly. The only time he goes against his morals and potentially condemns innocents are when he votes for himself instead of Mondo in the Chapter Two Trial, which seems to be him not fully realising that someone he associates with “being good, just and moral” (his new, and only, friend) doing something as amoral as murder.
He simply doesn’t believe that someone he trusted could turn out to do something so wrong- to the point where, at the end of the second trial, he is begging everyone else to give him another explanation, or for Mondo to at least explain why he did the things he did. I understand that this is a reasonable reaction when one’s friend is faced with death, but consider this in the context of the Dangan Ronpa games. To keep up the flow of the games, characters usually seem to brush aside the murders and executions once the trials are over. Otherwise, things would drag out too long while the cast mourned. Even Naegi, who was good friends with Sayaka and knew her all the way back in middle school, only spared a few hours or so mourning her after the end of her trial.
Kiyotaka’s reaction is the most drastic in the first game, even surpassing Asahina’s bid to make Sakura’s suicide a mistrial. She’s only shown to be seriously affected by Sakura’s death for the duration of the trial, and afterwards is composed enough to fight back against the mastermind. Consider also that Asahina and Sakura were friends for the entire duration of the first game, and that Kiyotaka and Mondo were only friends for one day, and you can see how exaggerated and strange Kiyotaka’s reaction really is.
Kiyotaka’s reaction is so strong compared to the other characters because Mondo’s killing is not only a betrayal to their friendship, but the betrayal to Kiyotaka’s perceived view of the world and what’s right and wrong. He fixates on his hatred of geniuses to an almost unhealthy level, and will not listen to anyone who tries to tell him that these “geniuses” can be good people as well. Simularily, he’s put Mondo into a box- a box that raises him above the amoral sensibilities of the killing game, making him someone who can do no wrong in Kiyotaka’s eyes- until he does.
This is the only time Kiyotaka’s moral compass seems to be seriously tested in the killing game, and it destroys him. He relies so much on his fixation with morals, that the second they are shattered, he breaks apart. Of course, this is only a minor reason for his breakdown, but we’ll get into the rest of that later.
Another big clue to Kiyotaka being autistic comes in the form of his social skills- or, rather, his lack of them. Kiyotaka, in his entire life, has made one genuine friend. Mondo Oowada seems to be the only person he’s truly connected with, and he even states that he’s “never had a proper conversation before” in one of Naegi’s FTEs. It’s not hard to see why- Kiyotaka has very little social intelligence, which displays itself multiple times throughout the story.
He doesn’t understand that people watch TV shows and play video games to form connections over them- he just thinks they do so to get a temporary buzz out of them. He’s surprised when Naegi describes what people normally do when they hang out, and his idea of a social setting is a very old-fashioned Japanese tradition of communicating naked in a bathhouse with other men. It’s obvious that he’s personally never had an experience like this before, as he’s reportedly “never held a conversation longer than three minutes”, so he’s most likely picked this up from old Japanese literature or other media and assumed that’s still how teenagers hang out.
Mimicking behaviours from media is another common autistic trait, and even though Kiyotaka doesn’t seem the type to read a lot of books outside of school-assigned ones, he still displays this trait. Mimicking other people in general seems to be his go-to when it comes to social interaction- he calls Naegi a “Professor” when Naegi tells him how to hold a regular conversation, and says he will study the same games and TV shows Naegi knows about to be able to hold conversations just like he does. Kiyotaka, once befriending Mondo, is shown to be mimicking him in some ways- he starts calling Mondo “kyoudai”, something common amongst gangsters in Japan. In the English localisation, this is changed to “bro”, slang that would also most likely be picked up from Mondo.
After Mondo dies, Kiyotaka copes by completely mimicking him, even combining their names together and acting like Mondo to feel closer to him.
Kiyotaka doesn’t seem to understand sarcasm or humour, in most cases. Kiyotaka seems a little oblivious in general, and tends to brush aside other’s criticism- a lot of the times because he doesn’t understand it. He takes things very literally, which is a key autistic trait.
He also wholeheartedly does seemingly idiotic things in an attempt to help others in the class trials- such as calling for the murderer to raise their hand, and stating obvious facts that were taken as a given (examples: “I propose that the victim was Sayaka Maizono”, and “We can be sure the knife was the weapon because of where it was found- sticking out of the victim’s midsection!”). Kiyotaka also displays this kind of well-intentioned, yet obvious advice when everyone is searching the school for an escape route- while others take note of potential danger and means of escape, Kiyotaka’s only contribution is to say that everyone has a dorm room.
This makes sense for him, and most likely for others with autism- nobody’s mentioned it, and he has the information, so he thinks it will be helpful to share it. He doesn’t get the subtext that people will already know these things, and that clarifying them further wastes time and isn’t helpful in the grand scheme of things.
While his dedication to morals and his lack of social skills are the most major identifiers of his autism, he also displays a few more subtler autistic traits.
Kiyotaka insists on holding the class meetings at a certain time in the morning, and arriving to the cafeteria at another set time. He’s always a punctual early comer, and he gets annoyed when others are late (holding back the time of his meeting). It can also be inferred that Kiyotaka is one to plan things- he has to be, if he’s taking on studying (and presumably kendo practise, due to the sword found in his room) as his only hobbies. This, and his love of the school system, can be hints towards him needing to function on a schedule. School is good for Kiyotaka because it’s structured, and planned, and not very subject to change. His hobbies of practise and studying are also not subject to sudden reschedules (unless he takes kendo lessons, but with his family’s financial situation, I don’t think that’s the case). A steady schedule is imperative for autistic people to function on a day-to-day basis.
Kiyotaka only wears one set of clothes- his school uniform. He owns several copies of it, and refuses to wear anything else. It’s implied that he doesn’t own anything else. This could be his dedication to being a good student, but it could also easily be a manifestation of sensory issues. Kiyotaka may only feel comfortable in the material of his uniform, and doesn’t like wearing other clothes because they make him feel uncomfortable. As a fellow autistic who prefers their school uniform to their other clothes, I can definitely understand this path of logic.
Similarly, Kiyotaka is a one-note cook. It’s revealed in School Mode that he can only cook rice balls and green tea. This seems like another case of sensory issues, where the textures of rice balls and green tea are soothing to him compared to other food tastes and textures. It seems a little odd that he’s put enough practise into creating his “famous green tea”, but wouldn’t branch out to cooking different kinds of foods than simply rice balls, especially if he wants to have a more balanced diet.
Kiyotaka’s fixation with the things he does know how to talk about seem to be extremely intense. Kiyotaka seems completely ready to engage in a long debate with Naegi over politics, international affairs, and the economy. He also seems to have memorised his school’s old policy, and seems delighted to talk about schoolwork. These could be examples of special interests, topics that Kiyotaka fixates on and ignores all others. Kiyotaka’s biggest special interest seems to be revolving around politics, a career path he hopes to succeed in in the future. Other than that, he seems to have a special interest in school policy and the school’s curriculum, shown with his dedication to school code and his continued study of everything he has to learn about. He doesn’t understand that other people can do recreational activities that don’t revolve around these two interests of his.
Physically, Kiyotaka has an almost unnaturally straight posture. He stands with his legs pressed tightly together, and seems extremely rigid. An unnaturally rigid posture is a trait of autism (as is an unnaturally slouched or floppy posture, but that’s not relevant here). Kiyotaka is extremely prone to crying fits, even in the middle of regular conversation. He is shown holding his head and sobbing full-force in some of his FTEs, which then turns into him cheerfully laughing a few seconds later. Extreme mood swings and unprompted crying or laughing are traits of autism. When Kiyotaka is reprimanded, or when he believes that he’s done something wrong, he immediately switches into an over-reaction where he cries and begs someone to hit or “punish” him. Breakdowns like these are also common in autistics.
Kiyotaka’s speech is abnormally loud. He seems to have trouble speaking quietly or whispering, and most of his lines are yelled. Volume control like this is a classic autistic trait. Kiyotaka’s dialogue also seems stiff and stilted at times, or verbalised in a strange manner.
I could go on more about Kiyotaka’s autistic traits, but I think I’ve said enough for one post! This is long enough as-is! I definitely think that Kiyotaka Ishimaru is autistic, but it’s up for you to decide if you agree with me.
#kiyotaka ishimaru#ishimaru kiyotaka#dangan ronpa#character analysis#autistic headcanon#actuallyautistic#my post
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tr8r goes to the beach — er, I mean, Traitor Among the Chiss initial thoughts
I have gotten… okay not much sleep. Maybe third time’s the charm. Anyway, I’ll just mash on the keyboard and see if anything somewhat coherent comes out.
Spoilers below the cut.
Storywise, having read the datamined dialogue ahead of time, I knew we weren’t going to get all *that* much in the way of content this time. Which seems a bit weird, considering how lopsided the cutscenes on this storyline have gone. However, having recently replayed through Forged Alliances on *cough* one of my Sentinels, these very short cutscenes with dialogue is actually pretty in line with the SoR stuff, at least in length. Seeing as the next part is supposedly the finale, a four act structure is kind of, well, weird. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ But whatever. I understand since the last installment had the “twist” of Theron being the “traitor”, they have to attempt to maintain that charade here.
]Maybe the real traitor was the friends we made along the way — oh wait.
So, first up, we get to meet Saganu! For the one person on the internets who hasn’t played through the IA storyline (aka me), it was fun meeting him! He seems like an interesting guy, so that should be a fun little bit for my new Chiss agent whenever she gets that far into the storyline. Hopefully Vector won’t mind too much. We also meet Raina, who seems a bit soft-spoken (not to mention a touch nosy, but considering she’s in intelligence, that kind of comes with the territory), and loyal to the Ascendency. Given that this was also the first time I’ve really met this character, I also liked her. Another reason for me to buckle down with my (actual) Agent while waiting for the next bit o’ story to drop.
And I mentioned it before but Copero is pretty. Like really, really pretty. I plan on sneaking through the FP on one of my stealth characters at some point to get more pictures, possibly in 4K, because damn that place is gorgeous. I would do the same with Umbara, but I am not lying when I say that the train makes my computer cry.
The atmosphere of running through Copero, and especially facing off against Boss #2, I think I mentioned before, but I was getting some major spy-fi vibes from. Between the gorgeous scenery on the outside, the henchmen just lounging around in various cafes, some just goofing off, some stealthed and waiting to pounce was giving me serious flashbacks to those cheesy fight scenes from shows like Man from U.N.C.L.E. and Wild, Wild West. Like seriously, I know I’m chasing supposed tr8r boyfriend throughout this, but he should have been there with me, at least in spirit! This atmosphere is right up his alley. I’ll have to re-run it with him as a companion, so at least we can pretend to get our 60s Spy Flick on. Maybe I’ll put on the Austin Powers soundtrack in the background.
Mechanic-wise, I kind of miss my godmode droid, who makes re-running the story flashpoints much easier. It certainly would have helped when facing off against the first boss, whose mechanics I suspect have something to do with those tank droids but was just trying to power through on the third attempt. The other two bosses were a breeze, because Sentinels are ♥.
There was some interesting by-play going on between all of the characters. I can’t help but get the feeling that these cut scenes are heavily redacted/reduced. I think they were trying to save the big reveal for the end that, but it kind of messed with the pacing beforehand. Bioware, I’m usually pretty lenient on story telling, but you’re kind of shooting yourself in the foot by trying to withhold information to preserve your twists.
First up, we have Miss Suspicious Sith. Maybe she’s just paranoid at this point, but I’m finding her so all over the map during this storyline, either I have the worst handle on Lana’s character, or there’s something weird going on here.
What was that for, Lana? Who were you nodding and giving secret signals to while the Outlander is busy talking to our unexpected guests? Why did the camera insist on focusing on you for this? Is it because he said where Theron was? Um, okay, if that’s the case, was that really a necessary cut? We like immediately go there in the next cut scene. STOP BEING SUSPICIOUS LANA. I HAVE TRUST ISSUES RIGHT NOW.
*ahem*
I mean, not that that’s your fault. We’ve been sort of written into a corner here. My poor sweet knight. She just wants everyone to get along. And yeah, I saw The Letter™, but I’m not even going to attempt to touch addressing that right now because it’s a whole other can of worms. And I’ve had my fill of needless dash drama I need to be operating off more sleep before I attempt to tackle that.
Hint: I think it’s suspicious
Also interesting in the “Wait? Am I imagining that?” realm of awkwardness: Was it just me, or was Valss (here on out to be referred to as Force!Chiss, because I’m just like that) checking out Theron’s ass?
Like seriously, look at him a bit more hungrily, pal. I mean don’t get me wrong, it’s nice to look at but--
Probably more meant to be evil smirk of evil.
Theron seems to be very studiously not looking at Force!Chiss. If there’s an attraction there, it seems to be one-sided. Which makes sense, even during Shadow of Revan, Theron was mostly focused on business. And well, he’s particularly motivated at the moment to finish up his spy shenanigans. Okay honestly, between his letter and the way he said “this is goodbye” back on Umbara, I kind of get the feeling he’s viewing this a suicide mission. Idiot.
Just like in the short story from the dev blog, he’s still having a very, very hard time staying in-character. You see him break character a few points in this scene, as the magnitude of what he’s gotten himself into seems to be weighing pretty heavily on him here. You got a little too comfy on Odessen, didn’t you, buddy? What with your nice, warm bed, and loving girlfriend, and all those people you actually kind of sort of liked? Makes it hard to go back to being a lone wolf secret agent trying to save the galaxy by himself. Maybe you’ll think about that the next time you decide to blow up a train in a very subverted attempt to play hero, hmmmm?
God, Theron, will you stop making those faces? It makes it hard to stay mad at you when I have to suppress the constant urge to hug your dumb butt.
The latest superweapon Theron has to blow up (it’s his schtick, along with taking out Dark Council members) is on a mysterious planet of mysteriousness. “Of all the gin joints in all of the planets in all of the galaxy, why do I have to go back there?” My guess is Yavin, with Ziost as a runner-up. Yavin’s got more lore (and that new PVP map), but Ziost has more bad memories. I’m bad at guessing, though, so watch it be something like Ilum or Hutta just to be like that.
Actually I know a few people are trying to decode the map, they have much better guesses since they: A) Know how to read a map B) Probably don’t get lost traveling in a straight line
Anyway, yeah, Force!Chiss happily hands a bomb over to blow up the map, thinking he’s found his soulmate in property destruction. Theron doesn’t have the heart to tell him all of Umbara was a bit. There’s mention of Force!Chiss having a vision, but after rewatching the scene a few times, I’m still trying to figure out if he’s pro- or anti-Apocalypse. This is one of those things I think they were trying to leave vague because Drama™. God I wish they had released this storyline as one giant chunk. This constant speculation and second-guessing of everything is killing me.
Back in the other land of spy games, Saganu forgot to do his research on Grey and asks her to go ahead and execute her prisoner. Oh. Oh Saganu. If she didn’t even punch Saresh in KOTET, why is she going to murder someone for a political alliance? Anyway, Syndic is going to be roomies with Saresh in the Greyverse. Maybe they can bond over how much they hate Theron Shan together in the brig. I smell a new sitcom coming.
After a series of puzzles I apparently just blindly walked through (THERE WERE MACROBINOCULARS??? SERIOUSLY????) we finally get to the big boss scene. And someone is in T-R-O-U-B-L-E:
Theron of course is pained to see Force!Chiss face off with his beloved Outlander.
I’m sure the subtle as a sledgehammer storytelling is to have me believe that Theron is purely concerned for the safety of his fellow conspirator, but depending on where Force!Chiss falls on the Apocalypse spectrum:
Theron is either like “Crap I’m getting everyone killed. Maybe I should have thought this brilliant plan through?” or possibly just “Shit, don’t kill my girlfriend plz”. Whenever the devs decide to stop being greedy with the facts, maybe we’ll find out.
So, all’s well that ends well. Sort of. Theron got away to tr8r another day. Grey accidentally started a Chiss civil war because she said murder was bad, but in traditional Fractured Alliances fashion, she’s probably just going to send Saganu a fleet of warships as an apology or something. Lana seriously needs to invest in a stationary set for the Commander or teach her how to write “sorry bro” on a napkin or something. At this rate there’s not going to be much of a fleet left, and I’ve got the strange feeling we’re going to need it soon.
But finally, we’re allowed to go “Hey, wait a minute!”
“Hahaha, oh, Commander, you silly goose, Theron’s proved himself to be a dirty filthy tr8r. The tr8r-est of the tr8rs. Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain! ANYWAY I’M GOING TO IMMEDIATELY CHANGE THE SUBJECT—”
I’m thinking Lana’s feeling left out, Grey. Maybe you should offer her a fleet of warships. After all, she got tazed on the last mission and you were more concerned about your boyfriend blowing up a train, and you have given them to everyone else at this point. Time to offer the Official Highwind Apology Package™.
I digress.
We cut over to Theron, and the next big reveal—
Wait? Could this be???? COULD THERON *GASP* NOT BE A TRAITOR? COULD HE BE UNDERCOVER? NO ONE SAW THIS COMING! WHAT A TWIST TO THE TWIST!
But actually what’s more interesting, is that someone on the other end of the holocall forgot to turn on his voice modulator this time around. And my oh my, isn’t that voice familiar?
GUESS WHO!
youtube
Hi there, Indo!
So I take it after the big Alliance soiree at the end of KOTET, you decided that the only party that could top it would be an Apocalypse Party, eh? Hope you don’t mind, but I’m going to pass on the punch/Kool-Aid. I’ve seen what it did to your last recruit.
Although, this does explain Theron’s hair and new jacket. No one can beat Indo Zal at being the Galaxy’s Next Top Model. He had to sabotage the competition, because the fauxhawk was a threat to that magnificent pompador and it had to be eliminated. Theron feared for Old Red’s safety and hid him in the nearest closet.
According to the roadmap, the next installment will be the last in the Fractured Alliances storyline, and you know what? Thank god! Like, usually I enjoy the serial format, but this particular storyline? I would have appreciated being dropped all at once, instead of them spreading this unrepeatable content across over nine months. I mean, sure, it gave us Gravedrog, but I’m not sure even Gravedrog is worth all of this in slow, drawn out and excruciating fashion.
I have thoughts on where this is all going, especially Indo’s involvement (go check out his codex entry. It’s interesting), but I’m going to save that for a spoilery, speculation thread filled with datamining and some other stuff from my observations.
I mean, I know I’m sounding a teensy bit critical, but overall my opinion on this storyline hasn’t changed. As long as they don’t stick the landing and do something stupid and jump the shark worthy, such as breaking up my OT3 Dream Team, or killing Theron and/or Lana, this has the potential to be building up as one of my favorite storylines. I really hope they don’t skimp on the emotional payout at the end, though, because all of this angst that’s building up needs somewhere to go!
I’ve got my suspicions that this storyline is actually a lead-in/build up to something much larger, although I have literally no evidence whatsoever to back that up. I guess we’ll truly see when we finally get part four next year. I hope it’s a meaty part, and it finally gets everything out in the open.
#spoilers#traitor among the chiss#long post is long#this post ghost written by sleep deprivation#picstravaganza#i got a little carried away#identifying the voice behind the mask was a team effort#clan piranha
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