#like bro i want to DO things but nooooo

[princekirijo]

So tired of being tired lmao

[todayisafridaynight]

Especially because in the end... Arakawa loses his son in small ways that just Accumulate... but Jo's the one who even gets to outlive his son... AUGH. THROWING MYSELF INTO A WOODCHIPPER

Also while going through old messages, I saw I actually had a dream back in 2021 that Jo came back in LaD8. I mean sure he had "longer hair" and "a new outfit NOBODY liked except me" and was Unserious like RGGJo whereas in the actual teaser he sounds more depressed than ever but I'm still taking credit alright... the vision came to me...

And in a Hell Will Freeze Over Before This Happens I Just Like To Think About It way. I want him in my goddamn party and I have for all of Y7 so it's not related to the new game. I don't care. I want to find out what his favorite flowers are I want to take him to Every Movie and get his commentary on all of it I want to take him out to eat and watch his little itadakimasu animation play out I want to have the most light-hearted and inconsequential conversations and I want him to chime in I want to exhaust every option on his Drink Link I want to unlock his sickass tag-team moves I want to wear True Hero and fight by his side I want to shower him with so much love and affection he won't know what hit him (<- channeling Arakawa tbh)

its just insane because from a metaphorical sense arakawa 'outlives' masato in that he becomes aoki and like. That's One Thing, but then Of Course. There's Jo. //stuffing my mouth with wet cement// like OHHHH the pain never stops it never ends,,

mate i think your brain was just tryna manifest RGGJo to make a come back through y7 ☠️☠️ CREDIT WHERE CREDITS DUE THO BUT DAMN would have been. THE MOST interesting change to his character though.... on the real.... because yeah he just sounds so tired from the trailer so far （；´д｀）would be hilarious if instead of entering a Super Depression arc bro's just. Yeah Alright Fuck It. What Can We Do Now Amirite. walk right out the cell with the white suit and snake-patterned lapels and all ☠️☠️

OK BUT MOST VALID RANT EVER. MOST VALID WANT EVER. would really just have the vibe of dragging your jaded uncle around the city i would died to have that,,, 😭😭

[auroreliis]

Imagine reader slipping up & call them the Catboys/Catfamily

They would be so bitter lol

If you called Bruce Catman, or something like that, he would be so confused, I'd love to see it. Jason would laugh, of course, but Bruce would remain stern,"Who is that? Where did you hear that name?" It implies that you were going to say Batman, which is also a big no-no.

Dad, Father, parental figure and Papa (and maybe a few other niche ones) are the only ones allowed. He is not Batman in front of you, only your father. And it BETTER stay that way >:(

Dick would freak out if you called him Catbro.

"NOOOOO NONONONONOOOOOO IT'S BIG BROTHER, OKAY??? BIG BROTHER!!!!", he would whine, with tears in his eyes. How could you do this to him? He's Richard, your dear elder brother. Well...actually, don't call him Richard either...just big brother, okay?

Jason has been called many things by you: Nuisance, asshole, jackass, weird guy who won't leave me alone...you get the point. However, never in his life would he have imagined being called Catbro. His reaction is one of disgust. With a scrunched up face he would tell you to stop. Right away. And don't do it again.

Tim, like Jason, has been called a plethora of insults by you, so just the fact that you talked to him at all makes him feel all warm and fuzzy inside. If he knows who you're talking to, he really doesn't care what you call him. He would certainly correct you and say,"No, no. I am neither Robin, nor a cat in your presence, okay? It's either Tim or big bro, alright?" He would try to be gentle about it.

Damian would stare at you silently untl you correct yourself. He wil NOT take this disrespect. He is either Damian or My dear younger brother to you, nothing else.

Duke would just laugh awkwardly,"Yeah, haha, whatever you say" He definitely wants to correct you, but is rather hesitant in fear of making you angry.

Barbara and Cassandra would both politely ask you to refer to them as big sister. Since they ask so politely, you cannot help but agree.

Stephanie just starts laughing like a maniac. You end up being so confused...does she...find it that funny? Is she being sarcastic? Why is she laughing so much? It kinda freaks you out. She throws her head back and starts hitting you on the shoulder. Like...It can't be that funny, right?

[dilfl0v3rss]

Hear me out 😮‍💨 - ony and y/n get in a argument but ony in the wrong and he look for a way to apologize

omg yessssssss bc usually we be the ones in troubleeee. i like how you thinking boo. we gon use basketball player!ony for this one since a lot of people liked it. aight so boom...

the argument

cw: smuttttyyyy

word count: 2.6k

── ⋅⋅⋅ ────꒰ ୨ ♡ ୧ ꒱───────

it was eleven o'clock when your boyfriend finally decided to come home. he had his duffle bag on his shoulder as he roughly kicked off his crocs at the door. you can tell he had an attitude, probably due to something that happened at practice, but so did you. it had been about a month since the the two of you have had so much as a movie night together because he's been so caught up in basketball and school. this was no where near your fault given that you've tried to spend time with him at every opportunity you had, but ony always had an excuse.

"can't mama, finna go to the weight room wit the guys." or "another time baby. coach had us running like a track team at practice." and other excuses like that caused you to stop even trying. and the worst part was, he didn't even notice. ony continued to come home late into the night because of basketball and leave early in the morning for class without batting an eye. tonight you've had enough. he promised to be home by eight since he only had practice from three to six, but lo and behold, this nigga didn't come home until eleven.

"do you know what time it is?" you stood up from your seat on the couch, placing each of your hands on your wide hips. you had to stop yourself from swinging on this nigga when you heard him mumble an "oh my fucking god" after sucking his teeth. "excuse me? you got sum to say nigga?" your were ready to scream. how could he have an attitude right now when he's the one completely in the wrong. he could've at least called to let you know he wouldn't be able to get home on time, but nooooo. he says nothing, and now he comes in the house acting like a child.

"ion got time f'this y/n. i been running around like a chicken wit its fucking head cut off all practice because niggas on the team don't know how to make simple jump shots." you scoff as you heard his excuse. "so first, you come home three hours late. don't call or text me to let me know that you were even coming late. and now, you come in here, don't even apologize, and have an attitude? that's cute. you sleeping on the couch."

your words must've set him off because ony immediately started raising his voice. "here you go wit that shit bro. the world don't revolve around you y/n." you started getting into his face. "i never said it did, but m'not finna sit here and act like ion deserve at least a little of your time. i'm your fucking girlfriend ony. don't you think it's a little odd that you be picking literally everything little fucking thing to do instead of spend time with me?" you can tell you struck a nerve when he folded his lips, looking straight ahead as if you weren't even there.

this was something ony did to keep his anger at bay since he was known to have a really bad temper. "chill wit allat cussing lil girl. m'not finna go back and forth wit you cause you being clingy." you was on ten at this point. you just told this man what he was doing wrong and all he registered from it was that you were cursing? "are you kidding me? you know what? you can have the bed. m'finna just go since m'so 'clingy'. when you ready to be a man and talk then you can call me." you went into your room and grabbed your PINK duffle bag before heading to your dresser to start packing.

ony watched as you stuffed clothes from each drawer into the bag, not even looking at what you were grabbing as tears blurred your vision. as soon as the words left his lips, he immediately regretted them. you had every right to want to spend some time with him given how much he's been neglecting you for other things. he let his stupid attitude get the best of him as soon as he walked into the door. he knew he should've apologized once he got home, but, being the prideful man he was, he decided to just make things worse by being a dickhead.

and now the woman that he loves is crying, trying to leave the house because he doesn't know how to control his emotions. before he knew it, you were at the door. holding your phone in your hand as you dialed your friends number for her to pick you up. ony listened to the phone ring twice before the girl known as eboni answered. "hello?" he wasted no time snatching the phone from you, hanging it up and putting it in his pocket. "the fuck you doing. gimme my pho-"

"you not leaving me y/n."

you looked up at him and were surprised to see water in his eyes. of course the tears never fell because ony never liked to cry in front of anyone, but the fact that they were getting to this point was surprising. you sigh calmly. "m'just gonna stay at eboni's for a couple days until you get your head right." you felt his strong arms wrap around you, holding you tightly as he spoke. "my head is right y/n. i was being selfish and stupid and prideful. i shoulda called or at least said 'sorry' when i got home, but i didn't. i called you clingy and invalidated your feelings. m'sorry furreal baby please just-....just don't leave me."

ony felt you shuffling so you can wrap your arms around him as well. the two of you staying like that for a while before you broke the silence. "i'd never leave you baby, just want you to be a little better wit your time management." he squeezed you tighter. "i will mama. i will" as the two of you loosened your grips on each other, ony lightly gripped your face in his hand before giving you a bunch of soft kisses on your lips, forehead, and cheeks. you were a giggling mess before you lightly pushed him away, making a fake serious face. "you still need to make it up t'me. what you said was mean."

a smirk crept on your boyfriends face as he led you to your bedroom. "ill make it up t'you right now baby." ony lied you down on the bed, removing his clothes until he was only left in his boxers. "take allat off mama i got sum else for you to wear." you gave him a confused look before eventually just shrugging your shoulders and removing all of your clothes. you lied naked on the bed as you watched ony pull his jersey out of his bag, bringing it to you. "put this on." was all he said before you gave him another questionable look.

"cmon pretty i wanna make love t'you wit it on." you had no idea what he was getting at, but you put in on anyways. ony was way bigger than you so the jersey was almost like a dress on you, stopping right below your ass before he lifted it up over you stomach and lied you back down. his body between your legs as he looked up at you. "ready?" his breath instantly touched your pussy, making you jump. before you could even reply, ony got to eating. he licked and sucked your clit like a starved man. long middle finger prodding at your entrance before he slowly pushed it all the way in .

your back arched off the bed as he kept sucking on your clit, middle finger reaching deep inside of you while you moaned his name like a prayer. "f-fuck onyyy" he moved his eyes towards your face, taking in your beauty before removing his mouth from your heat. "look at me baby. wanna see those pretty eyes." you slowly opened your eyes, pretty black lashes fluttering as you tried your best to focus on on him. a small smile crept onto ony's face as he added another finger into you, middle and index fingers digging you out as your eyes rolled to the back of your skull.

there's no way you could keep them open when he's making you feel this good. maybe you should get mad at him more often. your back was still arched off the bed before you felt your lover place his large hand on your stomach, pushing it down as he started fingering you faster. you felt your orgasm approaching as ony held his fast pace, licking and sucking on your clit to bring you to the edge faster. "ahghh...ohh my goddd...oouuhhh shit." you were losing it, hips fighting ony's hand as they twisted and turned all over the place. "i know mama. i know....jus let it out for me." the coil in your stomach snapped, liquid ecstasy flowing out of you and all over your mans face.

you shook in overstimulation as he kept eating without batting and eye. ony's fingers still held their fast pace as your hands flew to his head, trying to push him off and move back from him before you made an ever bigger mess. he bound both of your wrists in his hand before laying it back down onto your stomach. "stop runnin’ mama. m'not done." you were moaning so loud you had to make a silent prayer that the two of you don't wake up with a noise complaint notice on your door in the morning. "f-fuckk daddy ima make a mess pleaseee." you whined, but ony ignore you.

it actually felt like he started getting rougher. licking and sucking your clit harder while his fingers were now pounding into you. before you knew it, you were cumming again, making the mess you were trying to warn him about. you squirted everywhere from his face to his chest, some of it even running down his body and wetting up the waistband of his black briefs. ony sat back on his knees he looked down as your disheveled state. "look so pretty." he mumbled before pulling his underwear down right until his dick sprang free.

his hard length slapped onto his stomach before bouncing up and down due to gravity. doe eyes followed its movements. ony chuckled as he watched you become entranced by his dick. "y'ready mama? if its too much jus scratch my back cause m'not stopping until this this whole bed is wet." you nodded your head he lined himself up with your entrance, sucking his teeth at your lack of vocalization. "cmon baby talk t'me. you ready for daddy to make love t'you?" you look up to see his brown orbs already staring down at you. lips curved into a soft smile as he awaited your reply.

"yes. i want you t'make love to me" ony’s smile widened before he pushed himself into you slowly. eyes never leaving yours, reading your expressions to know when to stop to let you adjust. you were grateful for this because he was nowhere near small, and his girth alone would had you ready to cry at times. soon enough, the space between the two of you was completely gone. dick fully sheathed inside your pussy as ony waited for you to give him the okay to move. the two of you never broke eye contact through all of this and once you gave him a small "okay" he wasted no time.

slowly stroking you as he stared into your eyes. it was like the two of you were taking a look into each other souls. he began picking up his pace, pounding into you the way he knew you loved which caused you to tear up from the pleasure. "how it feel baby?" your back arched into him. the two of you stomach to stomach as ony intertwined both of his hands with yours. you couldn't even speak, using jumbled moans to reply. "aahghh...mmmughh." your eyes were at the back of your skull as you felt the tip his dick begin to kiss your cervix, making your legs open wider as you freed your hands from his and raked them down his back.

ony continued his onslaught on your pussy. letting you scratch up and down his back as he lied his hands flat next to both sides of your head, pounding into you harder. "mhmm sing f'me baby." you screamed as you felt your orgasm come out of nowhere. squirting once again on his dick, but he didn't stop. he fucked you through it, letting your essence splash all over your lower halves as he continued to look down at you. you were absolutely stunning. tears running down your cheeks as you looked up at him. bottom lip being tugged on by your teeth as your body jerked from his hard thrusts. "made my pretty girl cry. you should never be cryin'. daddy can't give you those babies if i be making you cry like that." he groaned before pressing his hand on the big number three on his jersey. he was so deep in you he felt the bulge he was making in your stomach under his hand.

your tears reminded ony of how you were earlier. angry and ready to leave him after he hurt you with his cruel words. he vowed to never do nothing that dumb again. "you only supposed to be crying from pleasure, never pain. m'sorry mama. s-so sorry." you began to spasm around your boyfriends dick, fourth orgasm of the night ready to come out. ony felt this and sped up, feeling close to the edge as well. "you forgive me baby?" his eyes never left your face as you whined out your reply. "i-i f-forgive you daddy. i f-forgive you." you smiled up at him, shakily putting your hand on his cheek. you caressed his dark brown skin as you felt your orgasm approaching. "i wanna cum together papa."

ony kissed into your palm before leaning down and softly kissing your lips. "cum mama. m'right there wit you." the both of your threw your heads back in unison as he gave you three hard strokes before stilling inside of you. cream leaking onto his base as you felt his hot load fill your pussy. you stayed like that for awhile, kissing each other while you caught your breath. ony saw your eyes flutter as you fought off your sleep. removing his jersey from your body before carrying you bridal style to the bathroom. he sat you on the toilet the turned on the shower. "need you to pee before i can let you get in." after you peed then the two of you showered together, ridding each others of the evidence of your earlier activities.

as you got dressed, ony changed the sheets and remade the bed so you wouldn't have to lift a finger. he then carried you to the bed, knowing your legs were probably still a little week before laying you on top of him. "mama?" he grumbled, you can tell he was getting tired as well. "hmm?" "im real sorry okay? never ever meant to hurt you." you lightly chuckled while tracing different shapes on his chest. "i know baby. and i know basketball and stuff could be time consuming and you just wanna do your own thing sometimes, but i just wish you'd give me just a little of your time y'know". ony rubbed on your lower back as he hummed in agreement. "ima do better. tomorrow i got early morning practice so im all yours after class. how that sound." you looked up at your boyfriend. he's doing better already. "sounds great."

[whyse7vn]

LOVE OCTAGON? -

[ ot7 x reader ]

YOUNG FOREVER

8 participants - 8 online

———————————

hobi: just did 8 push ups i’ll smack the shit out of anybody rn

jin: if you were a girl i’d be into that

jk: pls don’t hit me

tae: thought he liked men

jimin: could of fooled me

jin: ??????

namjoon: glad to see ur working out again hobi

hobi: what’s that supposed to mean??

namjoon: i’m glad to see you working out again?

y/n: can i watch?

jk: i want you so bad omg

y/n: ??

jk: sorry i was hacked

yoongi: did one of you order food to my house?

jk: no i wasn’t

tae: MY BURGER IS AT YOUR HOUSE???

OH MY GOD I THOUGH I WAS SCAMMED I WAS SO UPSET

jimin: eat it yoongi

tae: DON’T

pls 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

send it back to me pls i’m begging

i’m literally starving

and shaking

jin: i think you should give it back to him yoongi could be his first meal in months

hobi: real

yoongi: threw it away

tae: WHAT IS UR ISSUE??????

yoongi: you

hobi: namjoon do you want to fight?

jk: do you want me back?

jimin: shut up

tae: don’t expect to hear from me ever again bitch

yoongi: oh nooooo

namjoon: fight??

y/n: can i watch?

jin: this is stressing me out

someone give me a fun fact to calm me down

namjoon: um

hobi: xikers are the first 5th gen group

tae: that sounds like a disease

jimin: thought we would never hear from you again

yoongi: good things never last

jin: 5TH GEN??????

ARE YOU SILLY

THATS A THING??

THAT FACT DID NOT CALM ME DOWN AT ALL

jimin: ofc tae’s talking about diseases again

tae: am i wrong tho??

like

omg i got xikers rn

i’m itching soooo badddfd

pls i need to go to hospital the xikers on my back are killing me

namjoon: stop talking

tae: i’m not wrong

jk: are you ok tae?

what is xikers

it sounds bad

tae: i’m dying

pls remember me

jk: WHAT 😨

i will bro 🥺

y/n: he’s lying to you

jk: i’m not i swear i’ll remember you forever and ever

y/n: tae is lying to YOU

stupid

jk: oh

wtf man :/

tae: you never let me have fun

hobi: i want to be 5th gen

jk: but we said we were 4th gen??

namjoon: we are 3rd gen.

yoongi: let’s not do this again

tae: ME FOR 5TH GEN IT BOY

jimin: jimin 5th gen ace

jin: although i’m in shock and disbelief rn i’ll still take on the role of 5th gen it boy

tae: ?????

tf is wrong with you

can you read

i said i’m 5th gen it boy?

let’s vote

come on guys 🤗

yoongi: i vote jin

y/n: jin

jk: ME 3

jimin: ig jin

hobi: jin4thewin

namjoon: jin?

jin: i also vote for jin

tae: burn in hell

jk: y/n 5th gen it girl?

y/n: but i was 4th gen it girl last time

jk: ur right let’s swap

y/n: best 5th gen rapper

it’s an honour really

jk: i will use my 5th gen it girl title to help better the world

hobi: 5th GEN VISUAL HOSEOK

yoongi can take the best 5th gen singer title

yoongi: k

y/n: namjoon best 5th gen dancer?

jk: i agree

namjoon: ??

jin: idk about you but i love my new title

tae: i bet you do

jin: you sound mad

namjoon: again?

tae: i’m not

namjoon: you can take mine if you really want

i don’t care for you guy’s silly little game

jk: THIS IS NO GAME JOON

THIS IS OUR REAL LIFE

hobi: RIGHT

tae: KEEP UR NASTY TITLE I DONT WANT UR PITY FUCK YOU FUVK YOU FUCK YOU

jin: yikes

yoongi: all this shouting for what?

y/n: wow

namjoon: fine

jimin: why did jungkook go live naked

y/n: proof lmao?

jin: right put me off my salad fr

jimin: you were eating a salad?

jin: yeah?

jimin: ok

jin: tf you mean ok???

do you want to fight?

jimin: i’m just surprised that’s all

jin: why??????

jimin: cuz yk…

jin: no i DON’T know

pls enlighten me bitch

jk: i wasn’t naked??

jimin: yes you were

jin: HELLO???

YK WHAT?

jk: i swear i wasn’t

y/n: proof???????

jk: you want to see me naked 🤭??

i’m blushing rn

tae: i was naked once

hobi: this isn’t about you

y/n: tae sent me nudes by email once

hobi: ok this is about you

jk: WHAT????)/£/

jin: by email?

tae: omg why would you tell themmmm

jimin: why would you ever want nudes from that?

tae: that????

y/n: i never asked for them

who do you think i am??

tae: what does that mean??

namjoon: you can literally get arrested for that

tae: kinky

but i did send them on accident

so i’m sure the police would understand

jin: i do not believe that at all

and by email??

how is that an accident

yoongi: right

tae: plus i did look super hot right y/n?

y/n: that not the point

tae: see how she didn’t say no

jk: SAY NO

hobi: send the nudes here i say!

jin: DO NOT

jk: say no before i shoot myself in the head

jimin: wow

namjoon: it doesn’t matter if she thought you looked good or not you can’t go round sending ur nudes to people with without warning

tae: says who?

namjoon: the fucking law?

are you okay?? like that’s common sense

wtf is wrong with you

hobi: joons getting mad oh my god >.<

yoongi: thought we established he has no common sense

tae: i knew telepathically that she needed to receive nudes from me in order to keep living

jin: so you didn’t send them by accident then

tae: accident on purpose it’s all the same thing tbh

y/n: to keep living??

jimin: they are polar opposites actually

tae: omg all of u on my dick rn

don’t be mad i stepped up and you didn’t

jk: i was goONA STEP UP

ITVWAS SUPPOSED TO BE ME

I HATE YOU

IM GOING TO KILL YOU

hobi: jk’s mad this is scary >.<

jin: witnessing the fall the taekook in real time

wow this is truly beautiful

tae: omg chill out??

it’s nothing she hasn’t seen before

jimin: and is that by choice?

jk: I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU

hobi: wait what?

namjoon: everyone shut the fuck up

jin: look now you made joon fr mad

hobi: sorry namjoon >.<

tae: it wasn’t even my fault

y/n: i’m the victim here don’t be mad at me

jk: DO SOMETHING ABOUT HIM JOON

yoongi: i’m tired

jimin: this is a lot to take in

namjoon: taehyung apologise

tae: FOR WHAT?????????

hobi: ur sick in the head

namjoon: now

tae: sorry??????

jk: nasty bitch

tae: y/n let’s tell them about us

jk: what

yoongi: 🤨

y/n: us?

tae: ummmmmmm lol?

she’s normally not like this i swear

she likes me honestly

stop embarrassing in front of the guys babe

y/n: blocking you

tae: are u using me for my body???

i sent you nudes TWICE

hobi: one in a million we are twice 🩷💖

tae: you said i was hot

are we not in love?

yoongi: lol

jk: YOU SENT HER NUDES TWICE???????

OH MY GODDDDSJEJ SOMEONE PLs PULL THE TRIGGER FOR ME IM TOO WEAK TO DO THIS ANYMOREEEENBE

jimin: so like did she ask for the nudes the first time?

y/n: SHUT UP???

jimin: OH MY GODFF YIU TOTALY DID

THE PLOT THICKENS

y/n: namjoon tell them to stop taking

namjoon: stop talking

hobi: wait…

is this the fwb you’ve been talking about for weeks

tae: STOP SPEAKING

jin: wooow ur really sad

jk: OhH MY GODDDD ANd I CONGRATULATED YOU SND EVERYTHING OH MY GODDDHDXUD KILL MEMEME KILL MEMEEEE

y/n: fwb?

we have not fucked

jk: oh thajnk god

yoongi: have you kissed?

hobi: yoongi’s jealous >.<

yoongi: just asking

tae: i don’t want to talk about this anymore

jimin: look he’s embarrassed

they totally have not kissed

tae: bottom lie is that she said i was hot

jk: SHE WANTEF TO SEE ME NAKED BEFORE SO UR NOT SPECIAL

DONT LET IT GET TO UR HEAD

BITCH

namjoon: calm down jungkook

jk: HES A LITTLE SNAKE I WILL NOT CALM DOWN NEVER EVER EVER

I LIKED HER FIRST

yoongi: no you didn’t?

jin: is this a love triangle?

hobi: classic case of a love square

jimin: love square?

y/n: no one is in love

tae: my life is over

y/n: get a grip

jimin: i’m feeling left out put me in the square

hobi: it wouldn’t be a square then

jimin: love pentagon?

jin: make it a hexagon

hobi: wait wtf and me

love heptagon so cute 💞

what about you namjoon?

namjoon: what about me?

jimin: do you want to fuck y/n yes or no?

y/n: oh my god????

jk: YOU BETTER SAY NO

SAY NO

ILL KILL YOU

namjoon: i’m not answering that

jk: GOOD

WAIT WTF ARE YOU TRYING TI SAY YOU DON’T THINK SHES HOT???

WTF IS WRONG WITH yOU???

SHE IS NOT UGLY

namjoon: i never said that

jimin: i’m taking that as a yes

hobi: love octagon 🩷

y/n: what happened to talking about our 5th gen life 🙁

jk: i love 5th gen

hobi: what is with the gc name?

jimin: it’s for jin’s mental health

jin: ur actually decreasing my mental health by taking about 5th gen

jimin: are newjeans 5th gen?

jin: okay so just fuck me then?

yoongi: idk

hobi: I LOVE NEWJEANS

oHUr my OHUR MY GODTT

jin: i don’t listen minors sing

it’s bad for the economy

jimin: just say they make you feel old as shit

jk: i don’t listen to other women sing

y/n: ???

jk: i mean i love when other women sing

i actually only listen to girl groups

tae: he’s lying

because that’s actually me

y/n: shut the fuck up both of you

yoongi: real

y/n: and you

yoongi: ??????????????????????

jimin: LMAO

HE DIDN’T EXPECT THAT

jin: GOTTT HIKMMMMM LMAOSOSOSOIDKEKEKDKDKDK

hobi: i love feminism ❤️

y/n: it’s nice not arguing

namjoon: i’ve been telling you all

jimin: true!!!

hobi: you argue the most

jimin: me???

hobi: yes you

you and jin literally argued 10 seconds ago

jin: don’t put us in the same sentence like that i’m getting uncomfortable

namjoon: the fact that they actually shut the fuck up

what have i been doing wrong

jimin: maybe cuz you don’t have a pussy idk

namjoon: did you have to be so vulgar?

y/n: vulgar?

what are you 65??

hobi: pussy is power

NOT vulgar

jin: vulgar is such a nasty word like ew vulgar

namjoon: i’m leaving

jin: praise god

namjoon left “young forever”

tae: i love pussy btw

jimin left “young forever”

hobi left “young forever”

y/n left “young forever”

yoongi left “young forever”

jk: personally i think you’re so brave for saying that

—

and taekook lived!!

[skylarsblue]

✦Incorrect C.o.D Quotes, Again✦

Guess who's back...back again-

Ghost @ DILF!Y/N: Stop making me have gay thoughts, General. I look at men and I feel weird. I feel strange. It makes me wanna do things. I don’t like that.

(This also works with Soap, of course)

-- (Based on that one Avatar moment that set the fucking bar for me. Also, bonus random name of an NPC) Ghost: Oliver is the best sniper. DILF!Y/N, real softly over Ghost’s shoulder: …well I don’t want Oliver. Ghost, a man with daddy issues: Ghost, internally: HOLD IT THE FUCK TOGETHER SOLDIER, WE’LL GET THROUGH THIS

-- Y/N: I was gonna say that if in ten years time, the two of us aren’t married, let’s agree… Gaz: Yeah? Y/N: To hunt each other for sport. Gaz: T-To hunt each other for sport?- Y/N: Yeah! D-did you just agree?! Gaz: I thought you were gonna say like, y’a know, let’s get married! Let’s- Y/N: Oh! Oh. Gaz: I’ll be your Gilligan! Y/N: I didn’t mean- the signals-

-- Gaz: Sorry! I thought I saw a wasp. Y/N: Do you love me too? Gaz, breaking his neck: Excuse me?

-- (NSFW warning) Y/N: Like- no I know it’s bad but bro I- he makes me such a whore. Soap: Okay like, on a scale of one to ten- Y/N: I’d let him cum on my glasses Soap: ON YOUR GLASSES?! Oh it’s serious. Y/N: I KNOW

-- 141: *looking at knocked out Graves* Y/N: I’m gonna check his pockets. Alejandro: For weapons? Y/N: No, to see where he keeps the fucking audacity. Soap: *wheeze* No no, bad timing, don’t be funny this is serious.

-- Y/N: You wanna go toe-to-toe with me, pretty boy? Alejandro: Go for it.~ I’ll give you the first shot. Y/N: Better make it count, casanova. Alejandro: I never half-ass anything, mi girasol. Ghost: Oi, keep your pants on and focus, would ya?

-- Soap: Missed me missed me now you gotta kiiii…. Simon: Now I gotta what? Soap: Nothin’ forget it- Simon: No no, now I gotta what?

-- Y/N, surrounded by attractive men: Am I…a whore? Y/N: *looks at them* Y/N: I don’t really give a fuck, HEY TEAM-

-- Gaz: Why are you just…laying on the couch? Usually you’re up and doing something. Y/N: Can’t move. Soap: Why?? Y/N: *sits up on their elbows and allows their neck to be seen* Gaz: *gasp* Nooooo… Y/N: Mhm. Soap: Nuh uh. Y/N: König carried me here. >:) Gaz: YOU WHORED! Y/N: I DID!!

-- Someone: Please PLEASE don’t tell anyone. Y/N: I won’t! I won’t, promise. Someone: *sigh* Thank you. … Price: *doing paperwork* Y/N, busting in: CAPTAIN!! Price: BLOODY FU-What in the world?! Y/N: *shuts his door and smoothly sits on his desk* Captain you will not believe what I have heard.

-- Soap: I’m gonna stop listening to drama. I’m gonna focus on my training, be a better person- Gaz: Right, right. Y/N, popping in: Guess who got caught sucking dick in the bathroom. Soap & Gaz: WHO?! Soap: *falls out of chair*

-- Price: Be nice. Y/N: I’m always nice! Price: Really nice, not bitchy nice. Y/N: …you tied my hands but fine.

-- (With a random backstory I have in my brain for König) Y/N: How do you uh, deal with all this trauma? König: I call my mutter. Y/N: That’s beautiful, K- König: Call my mutter a bitch.

-- Gaz: GIRLFRIEND STOP, GET BACK IN THE CAR Soap with zero self preservation instincts: *sprinting with a pipe bomb* YOU GET BACK HERE!

-- Y/N: This entire team is full of babygirls. Gaz: Oh not that fucking meme- Soap: Full of huh? Ghost: Call me that and I will snap your spine. Y/N: Bring it! An honor sir! Price: Jesus Christ-

[thechekhov]

Dungeon Meshi Quick Reacts: CH.25

I think Laios would be equally thrilled by both options, personally.

worrying is a free action, Marcille. Dash!

Chillchuck didn't even want to be here, and yet he's going through it with the rest of them. Poor guy.

I do love the small accent this translator gives Senshi. All Dwarves are Scottish trope lives on.

Ouch.

The fact that Laios falls OUT of frame in the panels up there is just. Fucking great. I love how well these are stacked, how much it portrays the suddenness of the motions despite it all happening over an entire page.

Ch....chillchuk.....

You DO care!

The balls on his halfling are giant sized.

the little scallop in there is hanging on FOR ITS LIFE it did NOT sign up for this bullshit! I absolutely cannot blame it.

oh fuck oh shit nooooo!!!! D:

do not. Do. Not.

Oh, I thought he was gonna let himself be eaten. This is MUCH worse!

A little something in mind?! A little something?!?!?!

On one hand, it's really do this or perish with your friends. Or run, like cowards. But on the other hand.... can't you just lure it away with noise? Get your friends up? Something????

These two really are so sweet. Marcille is doing her damn best, going with whatever plans anyone cooks up. You gotta feel for her, she's physically useless aside from the magic...

Can't fucking believe that worked. I would have thought he'd just go careening off onto some roof.

Yeah, that was also bound to happen. Good thing he's an hp tank....

Oh I see. That WAS the plan all along. Wonderful. Marvelous.

OW. BRO.

HOLY FUGG

the fact that he didn't crack his neck in half on his way down is a testament to how lucky this son of a bitch is.

Adrenaline is a hell of a drug

you do that, buddy.......you....do that.

[the-atlas-sister]

ᴅʀᴜɴᴋ (Older!Damian Wayne x Older!Reader)

Warnings!: drinking, vulgar language, hungover behavior

You didn't intend to get hammered while attending your boyfriend's birthday party, but here you were.

After hearing comment after comment from Damian's rich friends about how you weren't good enough or their snide comments on your status or figure, you just decided, fuck it.

"Ahaha, I think you've had enough," Jonathan said, pulling the glass from your hands. He was the one friend of Damian's that hadn't be verbally ridiculing you throughout the night.

"Noooo, Johnny," you whined, reaching for the glass as he held it farther from you. "Please, I just need one more." You're eyes widened as a waiter walked by the two of you with a whole new tray of drinks. "Or five." You grinned like a madman as you grabbed another glass.

"Okay, y/n, y/n."

"Hm?" Your eyes followed Jonathan as he snapped his fingers. He laughed nervously at your state.

"You just turned 21, you need to stop drinking," he said, smiling awkwardly at your flushed drunk cheeks. "Especially because if you don't Damian might blame me and kill me," he added, pulling your tenth or so drink from your hands.

"Johnny, you're like, Superman," you not-so-whispered, leaning forward for emphasize.

"OH HO HO- yep, that's enough," Jonathan said loudly, sweat beginning to bead on his brow at your words. "We're just saying things now, huh?" Due to his panic he didn't notice you snatch the drinks from his grasp. "Y/n please," he sighed as you downed both drinks.

"Dude, it's good," you slurred, leaning on the boy. "I'm good bro."

"I do not think you're not so forgiving boyfriend would agree," Jonathan said, wrapping an arm around you gently. You felt comfortable, like he was protecting you. "Shot, speaking of which-"

"Dami!" you cheered, noticing your seething boyfriend approaching the two of you. "Hi baby," you slurred, pulling yourself from Jonathan and leaning on Damian.

"What the hell is wrong with her, Kent?" he hissed, holding you close. His question was quickly answered although as the smell of alcohol hit his nose. "Have you been drinking?" He looked down at your flushed face.

"So much!" you said, emphasizing every word. "Did you know, that if you drink, the voices of every single asshole in here, just kind of... floats away? Why did you even hang out with them?"

"Because they're not friends, they are business partners, darling," Damian answered, looking down at you with worried filled eyes. "Just ignore them."

You pouted at him before looking around. Even in your drunk state, you could see the looks the rest of the guests were giving you.

"You know what, I gotta say something," you slurred, pushing away from Damian.

"Wait, no," Jonathan began.

"Y/n, darling, there is nothing you need to say-"

"Hey, all of you!" you yelled, stumbling to the center of the room. You felt your face hear up as everyones eyes landed on your figure. "I don't give a shit what any of you say! I love this man!" You pointed a shaky finger at Damian, making him look at the ground and place a hand on his forehead. "Happy birthday baby! I love the way your nose crinkles all grumpy-like when you pout. I love how beautiful your paintings look and how much you care about animals. I love the way your beautiful eyes sparkle when you smile. I love how you look when you're focused, how your eyebrows crinkle and you hunch over, despite how much you bother me about my posture. I love how hot you look when you smirk and how good you fuck me-"

"OKAY!" Damian interrupted, rushing towards you. He grabbed your hand and pulled you away from the ground.

"He fucks me so good!" you called as you were pulled through the halls of Wayne manor. "Dami, where are we going?" you asked as you noticed the change of setting.

"You're going to bed," Damian said, his face a deep red.

"Nooooo," you whined, watching as your boyfriend pulled you into his lavish bedroom. "Please, noooo. I want to go back to the party."

"You don't need to go back to the party," Damian stated, sitting you down onto his bed.

You watched in your druken state as he gently pulled off your shoes, holding your legs softly as he did. You stared at him as if in some sort of trance, falling deeper in love as he treated you with so much love and care.

"You treat me so well," you cooed as he put you shoes aside. "I love you so much." You allowed the man to rest you against the plush pillows of his bed.

"I love you too, beloved," Damian said, placing a chaste kiss on his forehead. "Now get some sleep."

***

"Holy shit," you groaned, sitting up within a bed you didn't recognize.

"Good morning beloved," Damian's voice chimed through the air.

"Shhhhhhh," you said, throwing the covers back over your head. "Too loud." Damian chuckled slightly and you felt the bed lower as he sat down. "What happened last night?"

"You don't remember?" Damian asked, pulling away the cover gently. He handed you a large cup of water, which you reluctantly took.

"Oh god, what did I do?" you groaned, holding your head in your free hand.

"You may have announced how well I make love to you in front of my family, friends and business partners," Damian stated.

"Oh god, oh god sweetie," you said, throwing your head back. "I'm so sorry, you must be so upset with me."

"Oh very, but that's something for after you’re no longer hungover," Damian said, kissing the side of your neck lovingly.

"You treat me too well."

"I know beloved."

[hassianlovebot]

EXACTLY AAAAGGGGGHHHHHHHHH

tbf though i do think nai'o genuinely likes working on the farm and that's a big reason why he doesn't understand auni! he thinks auni is just being influenced by other people like hassian and najuma and one day he'll realize he likes farming. meanwhile, auni is trying to explain to him that he's never wanted farming to be his path. nai'o loves farming, he just needs to learn how to pace himself and not do everything for everyone yknow?

but it's so interesting too because hassian respects majiri culture a lot and is actively continuing his apprenticeship under his mother despite their issues and him not wanting to be a blacksmith. maybe auni even sees that as something to be aspire to... living his own life and adventuring while also sticking to the family path... OUGH all these characters make me cry :')

ohhmmyygooood im so stupid i literally just realized that a big reason auni likes hanging out with hassian (besides tau lol and hassian genuinely being good with kids) is cause hassian is literally doing what auni wants to do! he's living out in nature, exploring, "going on adventures", and meeting new, mysterious people!! auni must think he's so cool dude :')

[donutwatches]

MHA Movie 1- Two Heroes (Two Gay Dads) - part 2/3

So they all get dressed up like they are going to prom and everyone is adorable, but screen capping all of them would take up the whole post. BUT I must include this image right here:

Kirishima packed a suit for his bestie? He really said, 'No worries, bro, I'm not going to let you look stupid at the dance function with your usual tacky grenade hands and baggy pants'.

Is this an extra suit from his closet, or did he BUY a suit for Bakugo? He's giving him a suit with a floral print, with roses on it. King sh!t.

Melissa made Deku a super useful (if ugly looking) tool to help with his power not breaking his bones. That would have been great to have earlier. Will he only have it for the movie though?

One criticism I have of the movie is that these villains are very generic and boring. Having All Might tied up with this magically strong rope was a contrived way to keep the focus on the kids. I do not care about the plot much. This movie thrives more when it is giving fun character moments.

They got so lost they wandered 84 whole stories in the wrong direction, and have no idea villains have even attacked. Good job boys, getting that lost is a talent.

Why can I hear the James Bond theme playing in the background? They really gave Todoroki the coolest edgy one-liner in this movie. Good for him.

I am not sure how cannon this movie is, but I love the implications that quirk strengthening technology would get confiscated. The powers that be want to stay in control, and they see anything that messes with the power balance of the hero industry as a threat. Some juicy 'hero-society is not so perfect' material there.

Love that Dave fell for "You're worried that villains will hurt people? Nooooo waaaaaay." Davey-o you are meant to be a smart guy, but I guess no one is immune to being stupefied by All Might's thick pecs. I too, would turn to villainy to preserve Toshinori's mountain range-esque muscles.

Dave is stupid for going along with this plan, BUT he is was only made stupid by his true love for his old college babe All Might, so I forgive him. I support gay men's rights and wrongs.

They are shook! I felt genuinely bad for Melissa here. She looks up to her Dad, and her Dad just messed up in the messiest way a mess up can make a mess.

I don't know why Deku looks devastated though, he only knew this guy for 2 minutes. I guess, he is just an empathetic little bean.

...the image speaks for itself...

The sad thing is, is that none of this had to happen if All Might didn't keep OFA a secret from Dave. The entire plot of this movie would not have happened if Dave had been informed that All Might's power could be passed to a successor. All Might being secretive causes more problems than it solves.

Hold up, are the villains going to HURT people, for real? Noooo waaaaaay, who could have seen this coming?!

Part 3 is here

Masterlist

If you want, you can request to be added to the -

TAGLIST:

@blackaquokat @jessiedead @granny-griffin @setfiretotheshadows

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[webslingingslasher]

no but imagine during their situationship, troubles at a party and some girl comes up to her and asks if peters single (bc they’re always together and if anyone knew, it’d be trouble) and she plays it cool like “yeah, why?” and the girls like “no way! i always thought you two were dating! do you think i’d have a chance?” and trouble’s eye is twitching as she’s trying so hard to play it cool like😀😀😀 “ofc!! let me introduce you”😀😀🔫

nooooo wait wait wait WAIT

feeling slightly mopey, you take a trip to the garage for a game of beer pong. you'd rather not watch peter flirt with another girl, especially one that was prettier and most likely funnier and smarter.

you felt like you were brave, until she walked up to peter, then the anxiety settled in your chest. after a quick game you needed to check out the scene, heart dropping when both of them are gone from the previous spot.

you were terrified peter had taken things to a quieter spot... like his bedroom. until that same girl gave you a shooting glare from her group of friends, it had you confused until a heavy arm draped across your shoulder.

'upstairs. now.' it sounded very short, like peter was doing his best to keep everything in check until he had you alone. you've only seen peter heavily annoyed at best, but two words had your stomach churning, he sounded mad.

the second he had his door shut, peter hissed out at you.

'what the fuck are you doing?' you step back, suddenly feeling like you're being attacked.

'what? i don't...'

'no, you know. the fuck was that, trouble? a test?'

you shake your head, 'no? i don't know what you mean.'

peter's arms cross over his chest, he looks taller than normal. 'no? you have no idea why you sent another girl over to me? no idea why she said you told her i was free game?'

he's being extremely condescending, it makes you shrink down.

you keep your eyes on your shoes, 'i dunno. she asked if you were single.' peter's voice hitches, 'and you said yes?'

your head snaps up, 'well! what was i supposed to say?'

deadpan, 'no. you say no.' your eyes narrow, 'i love when you change the terms of our relationship and forget to fill me in.'

peter sighs, dropping his arms, he speaks clear and calmly.

'i don't like you thinking i'm looking for someone or something else. i'm working on something with you, alright? no one needs to know the details of us, all they need to know is i'm not available, and neither are you.'

you squeak your shoes on his floor, 'oh.' you don't want to admit the summersaults your heart just did. 'so like... label wise.. is that...'

he doesn't know the answer either. 'i don't think of myself as single, but...' he doesn't want to say the wrong thing, you'll say it for him. 'you don't think of yourself as my boyfriend.'

peter's response is a small head shake, you hum and roll your bottom lip between your thumb and pointer finger, trying to think of the right term.

'hanging out?'

peter tilts his head, you finish your thought. 'hanging out, right? we're not dating, but we're not single. we're hanging out, right? i mean, is that a good enough answer if someone asks?

'yeah. that's good, we're just hanging out, right?'

you smirk and punch his shoulder, 'me and my bro, just a couple of guys hanging out.'

'nevermind, i'm single.'

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s6 episode 1 thoughts

season 6!!!! my goodness, how the time sure has flown!! i started this whole project in may of last year, and now we are in january! so much has changed! but other things have stayed the same. 

i have heard mixed things on s6, so i am a bit nervous. but i am excited to be reunited. 

i am also curious to see where exactly the movie was set after the finale of s5. has it been a while, or only a few days? has our little friend gibson been missing this whole time? what about diana- did she pull through? will we get to know more about her?

we need to microchip gibson so we never lose him again. 

(i felt vindicated when people told me diana isn’t a fandom favorite, LMAO. i’m usually the girl that goes to BAT for overhated female characters, but she just seemed too intentionally antagonistic towards scully)

so… this episode shall deal with our agents going on a hunt. well, they had best be careful! there are a bunch of different aliens and beasts on the loose!

(post-episode thoughts: my fury at mulder is 75% normal juni rage and 25% enhanced by me being sick and emotional, a fact i only put together the morning AFTER i took all of these notes. you have been warned....)

anyway. let us begin!

(previously, on the x files)

(and i STAND by my opinion that CSM has a very soothing voice, okay?!? googling this man so i can see if he narrates any audiobooks)

man, i forgot about mulder pushing spender up against the wall and their feud. ah, spender. i feel bad for him, but that doesn’t mean i LIKE him. 

OH, WE GET TO SEE CLIPS FROM THE MOVIE IN THIS RECAP!! and they are in such high quality in comparison to the DVD i borrowed!! wow. when i watch it again sometime in the future- hopefully not on a DVD from 1998- i cannot wait to see everything so CRISP.

NOT THE KISS BAIT BEING INCLUDED IN THE RECAP LMAOOO

but now let us begin the adventures of s6!

NOOOOO! roush!!! the evil biological company! their truck is out in the desert. and their guys are pissing. 

well. this happens.

sandy is sweating. bro does NOT look good. i know his ass is not making it through the night.

when sandy gets home, he cranks the heat up to 80 in arizona, which is WILD. then he goes to lay on the couch and shiver. 

AUGH!!! his hand is JELLY???? it’s see-through!!! i did not want to look at all of sandy’s veins!!!

is he having an alien baby, too?!?!

his work buddies come to fetch him later. we see a bunch of photos of him in his house wearing a lab coat and doing doctor-y things.

AWW, his coworker called him sandman. don’t make me feel bad for the dude who works at the evil alien biotech company…

BLEURGH. he DID have an alien chest baby virus infection thing. OH, this other guy is SHOCKED!! AND HE HEARS THE ALIEN HISSING AT HIM!!!!!

HE’S GETTING EATEN!!!!! NOOOO!!!! 

RIP this guy :(

YAAAY, the intro!!! felt weird not having it with the movie!!!

and it was shortened, but okay. i’m getting used to that.

ahhh, look at this computer on which mulder is examining something. is he looking at micro film?

OH, the sweet boy, he’s restoring the fragments from the x files!! this makes me sad!! does that mean there isn’t a huge box of floppy disks somewhere containing all of them? because it is the responsible thing to do, making sure you have all your files saved in multiple sources! well, we’re only a few minutes into the episode. there’s still time for one of those to be found

and now he is presenting before a panel. he says the x files were destroyed “several months ago”, which places us on a vague timeline. scully is here!!!!

“i see your renowned arrogance has been left quite intact”, says this dude on the panel, and HEY! mulder literally isn’t even being arrogant at THIS MOMENT, OKAY? plenty of other times he is. but not now, as he is submitting his report on this alien spaceship!!

“i didn’t see men in black” “well it’s a damn good movie” <- LMAO they are BULLYING HIM!!!

scully looks pained. 

NOT THEM GETTING ON HIS ASS FOR THE TRAVEL EXPENSES STOOOOOP BEING MEAN!!!

OHHH NOOOOO!!! he says that scully can prove the whole thing, but she can’t. cut to them fighting in the hallway.

mulder… you’re pissing me off. SHE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT THE VIRUS IS OR HOW IT WOULD MAKE ALIENS!!!!!! maybe you should have brought a camera to the arctic. don’t you BRUSH INTO HER SHOULDER AS YOU WALK AWAY!!! you were going to KISS HER like a few weeks ago!!! i won’t tolerate this disrespect. 

CSM is debriefing the syndicate on the arizona alien deaths, saying he made up a cover story and it’s called “blaming it on Native Americans”. classic CSM, world-renowned great guy /s

so, he thinks the arizona guy who gave birth to an alien chest baby accidentally injected himself with the virus, and now the alien is on the loose!!! 

man, the presence of well-groomed man is missed. RIP. this other guy is here, though. so that’s good. i guess.

CSM says he is managing the situation. will he be sent out to test his sniping skills?? can you snipe an alien?

skinner is coming down to see mulder on the computer… NOOO, he breaks the news that his reassignment on the x files has been denied!!!!! 

mulder's all angry, and skinner tries to clarify he’s not arguing with him, but raises the question: “when will you accept that no amount of pressure or reason will bring to heel a conspiracy whose members walk these halls with absolute impunity?” <- ohhh, a very good point…

so they reopened the x files, then denied his reassignment? are they going to assign them to someone else? or just close them again?? will they keep scully on them?

skinner said that the vote was unanimous… he must have been trying not to blow his cover as mulder’s biggest supporter… but i'm sure this still made mulder very sad

so he gets all his stuff up and starts to leave. BUT SKINNER WANTS TO HELP HIM FIND PROOF??? SO HE CAN PROVE THE OTHERS WRONG??

i told you!!!! that man is my uncle.

he says there’s a file on his desk in the old office……. and sure enough, there is.

is this season much darker in terms of screen brightness?

OH SHIT…. why is spender down here in mulder's old office? WITH DIANA??? “diana, back on your feet. i guess that’s the only way you can stab me in the back” <- damn. he's pissed.

woah, what? okay, i was imagining scully staying on the project and spender taking his place, which would obviously be awful, but diana taking his place is like, worse. so now is it going to be spender and diana? instead of mulder and scully? ew.

jump to CSM lighting up in front of a no smoking sign… he’s just fundamentally a bad boy. he’s walking in where some sort of surgery is taking place!!!

he says he needs the patient bandaged and dressed, even though this might kill them. OH SHIT! IT’S GIBSON!!! and he must be in the middle of surgery!!!!!

EAIGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THEY HAVE HIS BRAIN OPEN………….

good lord, i nearly passed out. again, i repeat my grounding mantra: shoutout to the props team.

and he was awake, too………..

poor baby. 

AWWWW, THE AGENTS ARE DOWN IN PHOENIX to investigate the case that skinner left them the files on, and scully WILL remind him that they are violating state laws regarding contamination of a crime scene (she lets out a deep scully sigh, asking “why do i bother?”) yeah. idk either queen.

he sees claw marks on the walls!!! that does not look like it came from some bare hands. scully is not fooled by this claim in the evidence report. 

ooooooo, he finds a claw!!!!!!!!

“is that an animal?” “ain’t rupaul” <- LMAO I’M CRYING????????? 

mulder, i knew you were an ally ✊

(listen, both of those agents are bisexual to me. and maybe ace, too. depends on the day. THAT'S MY OPINION!)

(he hands the claw to scully very carefully <3)

feels wrong to see him in what i think is a polo, but it is hard to tell because the screen is so DARK.

oh yeah, let scully calculate the gestation rate of this hypothetical alien baby. under 12 hours!!! damn!! that is… quick. and also? how could a baby do all this, she wants to know? well. some babies are more equipped for violence than others. i guess. 

oh no! CSM IS HERE!! AND POOR BABY GIBSON, BLEEDING THROUGH HIS BANDAGES!!

please someone lay him down and let him watch spongebob. NOW.

gibson announces that "it" (alien baby) isn’t here. and that he knows CSM wants to kill him if he can’t find the creature. poor sweet little dude. they drive off.

mulder emerges into the daylight, and he does, in fact, have a polo on. but he is asking scully why she won’t believe him. MAYBE IT *WILL* TAKE AN ALIEN BITING HER FOR HER TO BELIEVE, BUDDY!!! DON'T RAISE YOUR GODDAMN VOICE AT HER!!

OHHH, SHE GRABS HIS HAND?? “listen, mulder, you told me that my science kept you honest. that it made you question your assumptions; that by it, i’d made you a whole person”

(okay girl, stay with me here now, but i think he meant YOU made him a whole person, not your science…….. but maybe she had to compartmentalize after nearly kissing him)

“if i change now… it wouldn’t be right, or honest” oh, scully <3 he has never deserved you or your kindness...

he’s being a whiny baby. like, i get it, and i understand. they're taking the x files away! and he needs to prove they are correct about aliens! but “i’m sorry scully, but this time your science is wrong” and walking away… 😒 which problem did that solve?

idk!! i see both of their points!!! this fundamental and ancient conflict is once again playing out, but can we focus less on the hows and whys of the situation and more on the “we need to get our jobs back and be bestest friends forever and ever, and also save that missing little boy and find some answers along the way”? please. consider this viewpoint. for me!

oh, let's go off to a nuclear power plant. again, very dark. noticing a theme here. it’s outside arizona. is that where the alien wants to go?

did they call the guy homer as a simpsons reference…? i see what was done here. well, something in the power plant is off. 

don’t send homer loose into the dark!!! the alien will eat him!!! especially while vague splattering noises are heard!!

CREATURE EATS HOMER……….

agents mulder and scully are on the scene. but so is spender!!!

UGH, he’s so ANNOYING: he basically says “i’m gonna get skinner censured for telling you some guy was murdered, now LEAVE” SPENDER!!! you are PISSING ME OFF!! 

(it made me think of that line from sharkboy and lavagirl: "mr. electric, send him to the principal's office and HAVE HIM EXPELLED!" <- that's what your whiny ass sounds like, spender)

and diana won’t let them in either, saying that it was "just a work accident". oh, so much for caring about the x files, huh? like you claimed in the last episode. you sound REAL invested now /s

scully gets him to come back to the car after he spits some venom at diana (“i hope you know whose errands you’re running”).

however, he says to give him the keys and tells scully to get in the car, and she gives him the most DIABOLICAL side eye LMAO. she is so suspicious of his shenanigans!!!

OH MY GOD, THERE WAS A REASON FOR THAT: SHE FINDS GIBSON IN THE CAR????? he’s out cold and she’s holding his head, calling him “sweetheart” oh my GOD????? 

wait. hold on. i’m emotional. hold on.

they take him to their motel, and she’s trying to smile at him while she trims off his bandages. he IMMEDIATELY READS HER THOUGHTS AND SAYS “frankenstein? really?” and DESPITE KNOWING HE CAN READ HER THOUGHTS, SHE TRIES TO LIE AND MAKE HIM FEEL BETTER.... OHHH, SCULLY

(this is still making me emotional. lying to the kid that can read minds because she doesn't want to hurt his feelings or scare him... knowing that she is the doctor that has to try and make him better, so he cannot know she thinks he looks to be in serious danger...)

he has some infection because they didn’t change his bandages and a fever, ohhhh this poor CHILD

so he ran away when they weren’t thinking about him!!!

scully, do you have antibiotics on you? is that a doctor-ly thing to have in your purse? please fix him. 

OHHH SNAP, HE CALLED HER OUT: “they were using me. because i can communicate with it” “communicate with what?” “you already know. you just don’t want to believe it”

actually such a fascinating narrative choice to have a child psychic call out her own internal lies… he’s too young to blunt his words, so we know they are the truth… getting to see inside what scully truly believes, even if she cannot admit it to herself, through the lens of this sweet angel with his poor infected skull...

(mulder nods his head to the side, indicating to her they must go talk privately)

he wants to take gibson out to find the Creature, but scully says he needs to be in bed under constant medical supervision; he is the evidence for the x files that can prove to the panel that everything they research is real!!

lowkey pissed me off that this boy is suffering in front of them so horribly and mulder wanted to go on an alien hunt.

so, they’re going to sneak him off somewhere. maybe to an alien hunt and then the hospital. but alas, who approaches them in the parking lot?

IT’S DIANA???? she claims to be alone. CAN WE HAVE A BREAKUP LATER???

she tells mulder that she took the assignment to represent his interests, reminds him that THEY found the x files together, and says that they should go find the beast right now. sure. whatever. you go find the beast, let scully doctor the poor boy. whatever. like i care.

he agrees to do just that, which i actually do think is morally wrong, because now scully has to play single mother to this sick boy. what if she gets sleepy and he is stolen from under her, like what happened with diana?

but diana and mulder are off to the nuclear reactor. mulder thinks that maybe the alien baby needs to be warm… maybe to grow?

so scully is with gibson, and he accuses her of only thinking about herself and what she can learn from him. “i’m a very special lab rat”, he says (deep and sad scully sigh)

OHHHH… these two are giving me feelings……….

gibson just wanting to be a normal kid, and scully wanting to take care of this normal kid who is sadly being used for ulterior motives, but also knowing that if she wants to keep her job and prove the x files, that she must test upon him, too... she must have felt so conflicted... and he must have been able to sense that...

meanwhile, mulder and diana are sneaking into a nuclear reactor. i hope they don’t kiss. i don’t wanna see that shit. 

do they have guns? like, good guns? what are they going to hunt the alien with?

he finds a sticky trail… while spooky music plays…. and the wrench from homer (RIP)

bro needs to stop touching mystery fluids.

EUGH he pulls out… guts??? 

but scully calls!!! they found evidence of the virus that she was infected with in gibson’s system!!!

is diana here to just snitch on their progress… with his gut haul…..?

NOOOOO!!! THE DOCTOR APPROACHING GIBSON IS GOING TO HURT HIM??? HE IS KIDNAPPED! AGAIN!!!!!!

SCULLY IS GOING TO YELL AT SOME DOCTORS ABOUT IT!!!!! THREE CHEERS FOR MAMA BEAR SCULLY!!! DON’T TELL HER TO CALM DOWN!!! GO FUCK YOURSELF!!!

the evil guy is taking him away in an ambulance while mulder and diana track the beast. and again, i’d like to know what their game plan is once they find the thing.

gibson is brought to the nuclear power plant as well, being forced around by his kidnapper, who wants to use him to find the alien. and i can barely see what is happening because it is so DARK. 

gibson is being brought into what i think is the nuclear core, where he declares that "it" is here. 

i’m gonna need this gibson fellow to make it through, okay?

mulder is POUNDING ON THE DOOR, telling the evil guy to open it NOW, you SON OF A BITCH!

diana wants to find another way in, maybe, idk, i don’t trust her!!!

AUGH, the alien EATS the evil guy!!! well. deserved, tbh. will the alien please NOT eat gibson, though?

and it seems that diana DID snitch on him??? she pulls her gun on mulder as the cops suddenly arrive??

IT’S TOO DAMN DARK, I CAN’T SEE IF GIBSON WAS EATEN OR NOT!!!

skinner is absent from the hearing in which the agents are being told they must not go near the x files at all, or else they will be immediately dismissed!!! and they are moved to assistant director kersh!!! 

who is this man.....?

i expect mulder to just hand in his resignation papers now.

EW, CSM IS HERE TO SEE SPENDER??? he says he doesn’t want to see him. but CSM congratulates him on handling mulder. and he calls him “son”. 

“simple but extreme solutions” bro is offering to kill him??? no... he says this will not do in such a situation

spender asks if he’s killed men... IJBOL! that is his whole thing, buddy. welcome to this show.

CSM says you cannot kill what a man stands for, unless you kill his spirit. can mulder's spirit be killed?!?!

mulder is back to investigating the scraps of paper from the x files. “it would help if you’d shut the door; it’d make it harder for them to see that i’m totally disregarding everything i was told” <- LMAOOOO

oh scully, always pushed to the side in his mad ahab quest: “everything we were told, mulder” <- YEAH, YOU TELL HIM!!!!!!!!

she thinks that diana is throwing him under the bus (her report makes no mention of gibson!! and lies about the body they found!! also, i think she literally pulled a gun on him when the cops rolled up??), but he INSISTS that she is doing this out of the goodness of her heart 

“and though it may not say it in her report, diana saw it too. and no matter what you think, she’s certainly not going to go around saying that just because science can’t prove it, it isn’t true” 

wait hold on… i’m emotional… that was so mean… why am i genuinely tearing up…?

scully just wants him to trust her…. and he won’t take her files, because he's being stubborn, but they are literally TEST RESULTS that prove his theories to be true……..

the claw matches the DNA from the virus and the DNA from gibson…. 

if it’s true, that means everyone is a little bit of an alien?? oh scully…. look at her…….. sciene geek...

back at the nuclear power plant, it’s GIBSON!!!!! he sees the alien going for a swim in the nuclear water!!!!! yucky. 

it’s hatching………… oh.

the end.

man.

i don’t know if i’m emotional on this fine evening, but i nearly cried at mulder disrespecting scully. how can you say that about someone, that they make you whole, and keep you honest, and then treat them like that? how can you just toss her to the side the minute someone else says what you want to hear?

like. what the fuck! i can’t tell if this is purposeful character development leading up to something or if he is truly being an awful guy. how can he go from trusting her with everything he is- his life and even his death, over and over again- to having a hissy fit because she can't prove the virus was alien? it's not like SHE is the one taking them off of the assignment! she is not the corrupt government! in fact, she knows better than anyone the reality of the corrupt government, considering they 1) KILLED HER SISTER and 2) TRIED TO KILL HER WITH TERMINAL CANCER THAT DAMN NEAR SUCCEEDED?

shakes my fist angrily… i think scully should get to bite him.

she NEVER blows up at him!! even when he deserves it!!! and he has!! a million times over!! but she doesn’t!! it’s his stupid alien nonsense that got her sister killed and nearly killed her!! why does he act like he is the only one who can see some bigger picture?? oh wisest of all men, mulder, enlighten us with your alien theories??? bitch!!! if i was scully, i would have had enough!!! i would need a break from him!!! i would take that reassignment!!!

okay, maybe i’m just really angry tonight. BUT I HAVE A RIGHT TO BE! we were making such good progress in the “telling your best friend you love them” department, that i truly cannot stand this!! you tell him anything he wants to hear and he’ll eat it up!!! sure, sure, this lady that you used to date CONVENIENTLY wants to save the project you just got kicked off of after dedicating your whole life to it. (heavy on the /s) BRO??? LET’S USE A LITTLE BIT OF COMMON SENSE.

grrrr, i’m actually gonna GROWL. i don’t CARE about your inner man angst, you HAVE TO BE NICE TO YOUR FRIENDS!!! she LOVES you and you LOVE HER, so you ought to ACT LIKE IT.

and they took my uncle skinner away from me…

oh, i just know that if i had seen this when it was airing, i would be SPITTING MAD!! i’d be on those discussion forums saying NASTY things!!!

man. i still feel angry.

scully and gibson…. she wants to keep him safe, but also wants to prove her theories, and he suffers because of it… poor baby… how she held his unconscious head, calling him sweetheart; how she screamed at the doctors who ignored her…. god…

see, normally i’d say “give them both a baby”, but right now i’m mad as hell at mulder, and he does not deserve baby privileges.

poor gibson… i hope he makes it out of that nuclear reactor.

also. spender. the most pathetic nepo baby of all time. is he not at all suspicious about why his absent father is suddenly making a reappearance? hello? and the way he just pushes people around with his newfound power? do you think CSM will just use him and then discard him like he does everyone else????

wow. much to contemplate. for now, i must sleep off my rage. stupid mulder in his stupid polo…

spender and diana are literally scully and mulder from shein.

[sunnysideaeggs]

uuuuh okay thoughts about S2E1 (disclaimer: SPOILERS! and some unpopular opinions bc i WILL be criticizing alicent). most of these i had during my watch yesterday, and now i’m elaborating on them after more thinking about it. looooong post ahead

okay i liked the new intro. i will miss the blood pouring but i think the tapestries are a more visual way to convey targaryen history.

my favorite parts were the shot of vhagar and balerion in the field of fire(? idk they were eating men (green dragon black dragon !!!), the jaehaerys and alysanne portrait, alicent and rhaenyra and aegon and rhaenyra crowned side by side. beautiful.

also, the blood beneath the thread !!! targaryen history is written in blood. never forget this.

i dont particularly like jace being at the wall. it makes little sense to me, especially because the north is massive and i don’t think that cregan would like to make a procession to the wall just because a prince is there. i liked the tidbits though: jon going to the watch is a tradition he followed unknowingly :)

show me more political jace please, he’s cool.

‘surely torrhen would’ve rather died instead of bending the knee unless he believed aegon could bring unity to the 7K’ jace pls 💀

it’s funny that in one scene rhaenys and daemon had more tension and chemistry than all the scenes of daemon with adult rhaenyra. maybe what he needs is a GILF to put him in his place? lmao

LAENA MENTION LETS GOOOOO

‘make it a son for a son’ referring to aemond? alicent has no bone to pick here be fr i can smell bleach for the whitewashing a mile away

i also have issue with the writers’ choice of making rhaenyra ignore her physical needs and spend apparently days riding on dragon back and doing jumps and that when she just had a miscarriage. it’s canon that she was in bed rest for half a year because the loss of visenya took a toll on her body. it will be dumb and criticized if she’s fine to disappear for weeks but not to fight.

alyn velaryon? ok i’m mad bc corlys literally knows this dude is his son ???

i love how we all pretend that corlys and rhaenys were particularly interested in the strong boys. idk i can’t really care about that anymore

ow is helaena sewing alicent a dress? please tell me it’s not a shroud

AEGON APPEARED WOOO 🍳✨

‘where’s jaehaerys? where are his lessons?’ my man doesn’t know to what school his kids go lol

also he can recognize the twins apart with only seeing them :)✨ cute

aegon wanted jaehaerys in his council !!!! he’s making sure jae KNOWS he’s his heir and he’s on aegon’s mind

oh hel is comfortable enough with him to tell him about her prophecies, i’m just afraid that no one understand her

‘the rats’ NOOOOO

aegon is always like ‘😐❔’ around her lol

‘the queen is an enduring mystery’ he’s a poet i love him

alicole pussyeating but at what cost

why does criston has that empty look in his eyes, he had the same look in his scene with rhaenyra

where is all the raw emotion between them from last season? it’s giving cersei and lancel when it should be cersei and jaime. no deep gazes, no catholic guilt, something’s amiss

jaehaerys and egg </3 my feels they’re so cute

okay i have a bone to pick here because why is tyland being treated like a joke? i can get past jaehaerys toying with him because he’s a child, but aegon respected his allies (that’s a big part about him) and would never antagonize them in that way. it’s given rhaenyra and lady redwyne when we know both characters differ the most in the way they treat their subjects.

also, this is TYLAND LANNISTER, the most employed guy ever. he literally put his skin on the fire for his team, he’s loyal and he’s the best ally the greens could’ve asked for. if anyone is to thank for the death of the dragons, it’s him. put some respect on his name because this is the finance bro to end all finance bros.

also he’s always saying important things: the treasure in the green council, jason’s moves here. please listen to him!

another thing i dislike is the way important political moves are being brushed off. the treasure is a big big matter. it should be said explicitly what the council is doing about it being the focus of the scene. i’m sure most casual viewers didn’t catch that the comedic relief is making big money moves that will backfire later.

but anyways jaehaerys is so cute hehe

happy father’s day to aegon targaryen and aegon targaryen only

okay i’m rewatching the jaehaerys and tyland scene and i love tyland’s accent, and how polite he is to the little prince

go aemond in the council !!!

‘you do not have a seat in this council’ okay alicent please stfu. i disliked her demeanor since she was chastising aegon and tyland but this is too much. remember you do not have a seat either.

and no she doesn’t: she’s queen mother, not queen regent. aegon is an able adult and can rule without her help. i know the only council we had was with cersei but that’s because joffrey and tommen were under westeros’ age of majority. that alicent is there is out of aegon’s kindness and the council members’ respect.

also why would she be mad that the brothers are brothering ??? girl you wanted them to be on each other’s side

SUNFYRE MENTION LETS GOOOO

‘we must proceed cautiously’ i think all caution must be thrown overboard here. i know they want to portray A/R as the ‘voices of reason’ being pushed to war and all but sometimes violence is necessary to prevent more violence. what tywin said about murdering a dozen people in a dinner and a thousand in battle.

i’m tired of this aemond slander. he did it, but he’s innocent your grace

why larys kinda…

ok i love his voice

oh so now every move of alicent is seen by larys. she knows that he knows. neat.

why do the handmaidens wear green? they should wear gold ☀️

okay i initially thought syrax was sunfyre because of the pink of his wings. i hope sunfyre is golden smh

it’s neat that we remember than no matter what side we’re on, for the common people dragons are a source of fear and caution. the fishermen are loyal to rhaenyra yet they will run away from her when she’s on syrax because they don’t trust a dragon.

rhaenyra’s pain is so deep, i really empathized with her. absolutely devastating. her expression, her grabbing the cape, everything

emma is so fucking talented for real, making me feel for the death of a character i dislike

(oh how the mourning of a woman for her child will cause thousands of mothers mourning their children the same)

‘aegon the magnanimous’ when your homie gives you a ridiculous nickname

my boy sits and listens to his subjects, calls them by their names and tells them not to be afraid. hello jerard what can i do 4 u? :)

i love how egg is like ‘yea whatever take ur sheep jerard pls like me’

okay i dislike otto here. aegon is obviously into crowd pleasing (a secret tool that will be useful later) and for once it’s okay. jerard will go home with his sheep and be a diehard aegon supporter and raise his kids to be the same, tell his friends about the king’s generosity. i think otto should know better than to angry the population in time of war, even if you can’t make the flock whole, give the man grain or coin so he can feed his family and the effort of going to the king’s house.

hugh? like hugh hammer? ooooh

‘our victory depends on the efforts of the smallfolk’ close enough welcome back princess diana

another otto slander moment here. i don’t think it’s wise to chastise the king (an adult, mind you) and putting himself in between of aegon and the court like that. did we saw otto with viserys? he sat by his side and whispered his advice in a discreet manner. he didn’t try and strongarmed his king in front of dozens of people. that’s not a smart way of doing things. it’s called soft power for a reason

also, i think the directors were trying to make otto parallel tywin in that joffrey in the throne scene, but tywin was explicitly trying to get joffrey to be more involved in the council and the two were alone. give it to aegon, let him have his fun in public and manipulate him in private, that is the way. doing dumb shit like that only makes aegon look like a kid and otto like a shameless powergrabbing dude

one thing i appreciate is that aegon has his own court. he has his lads-in-waiting, he has a few ladies following behind, and that’s how a king should be. we always saw the royal kids isolated (joff, tommen, rhaenyra only had alicent) when in reality most important people will have a flock of people accompanying them every day.

now that’s what i’m talking about. larys is all about being subtle, honey trapping his way to power. that’s how the game of thrones is played. while aegon will not agree with him just like that (because larys gives him the oogies), i’m sure he will remember larys’ words.

‘as viserys wished’ oh don’t speak of him fuck what he wants

an ally would not sit there and cut her legs at the table of men? girl you do that yourself

alicent, the problem is not otto undermining you, is both of you yapping about shit aegon and aemond not care about and winning empty victories lol

aegon will probably forget about jerard next episode, but will not forget feeling his wings being cut by otto. aemond remained in the council room but will remember alicent wanting him gone.

i wish alicent and otto believed more on their kids/grandkids

mysaria apparition yay

‘you speak of highborn games, i am common born’ tell him girl

daemon don’t put your hands on women challenge: impossible

chemistry with mysaria? uuuuh

i love how everyone reminds erryk of arryk like ‘ayo where ur bro at?’ a matching set is not matching, it’s giving the parent trap

‘i want aemond targaryen’ okay at least she knows who to blame. i want to see more of vengeful rhaenyra, let women be mad

daemon going for aemond instead of for jaehaerys is such a cheap move smh, whitewashing at its finest

jaecarys and rhaenyra :(

is it too insensitive to say that jace’s hair looks great? you’re serving cunt? your brother just died and you’re serving cunt?

ow alerie florent :((((

FUCK VISERYS TARGARYEN

i really like the symbolic funeral. that shot of rhaena crying over the fire? chills

is it me or they changed joffrey’s actor? idk

uuuuh alicent idk if that’s empathy or weakness 🙃

once again i don’t think it’s neat that they show blood being a normal goldcloak. he was discharged dishonorably for femicide. be honest

cheese’s actor kinda looks like joaquin phoenix

‘i want aemond targaryen’ i hate this fucking show.

ROSBY AND STOKEWORTH MENTION LETS GOOO

criston agreeing with aemond in private but backing alicent in public is the medieval version of ‘yea kid ur right but i don’t wanna fight with your mom’

criston looks so tired :(

‘her grace speaks with two tongues’ SAY YOUR TRUTH AEMOND

it is vain to try and blame aemond for starting the war when the war was brewing since before he was born. rhaenyra wouldn’t give up her claim, daemon wouldn’t accept it. if rhaenyra ascended, the targtowers die. there’s not another version of this story

‘she holds love for our enemy, that makes her a fool’ that makes her a traitor. especially after the events of tonight. do we think rhaenyra has a designated green supporter that tries to get her to the green’s side? why would the greens have a rhaenyra cheerleader then?

gods forbid something happens and otto is not there 🙄 control freak

i like how they’re making aemond more rage-filled. careful ewan your book!aemond is showing

‘aegon the strong’ ‘my nephews have already taken that one’ but egg 💀💀💀

i really love how aegon has his court. he’s protected by the throne’s swords AND his homies got his back

the true king can sit however he likes. he lounges on the swords and they’re as soft as pillows to him. pretenders can’t relate.

in a deeper level, it shows how he’s comfortable both in the throne and surrounded by people. he has high trust. kinghood is a tool he doesn’t have any training on but he holds it like a natural

aegon truly trusts aemond. i love that for them. if they make aemond to be treacherous i’ll cry

AEGON THE DRAGONCOCK 🐲 rip leon estermont you would’ve loved shitposting

also why the ratcatchers are just walking around the keep? are they in the tunnels or in plain sight?

the kick to the doggie :( i really hope they didn’t really kick a dog for that

unrelated but i really need the rats around the red keep to mean something like larys skinchanging into them. they can’t be a red herring or just blood and cheese. they have too many shots

again, why are they out and about? isn’t it weird to see dudes in the middle of the night?

helaena’s maid looks like emma stone and she has really good eyebrows. i’m pretty sure she knows something (larys agent ofc)

how do we go from searching for aemond to threatening helaena? whyyyyyyy

oh right we had to blame the smallfolk for being soooo greedy and wicked and stupid that you tell them kill a great warrior and they kill a baby. because daemon can’t ever order a baby killed amiright?

the little beds noooooo :( baby jaehaerys

okay i was expecting more of helaena. in the books she’s described as pleading, begging, crying and so on. phia is killing it with the eye expressions but she looks stiff in comparison with only her necklace. even trying to bargain more (my husband can give you everything and more), some more tears, some stuttering would fit show!helaena’s too. that’s on the directors tho

i also dislike the choice that anyone can just barge in the room, literally they had to make the castle desert instead of blood and cheese waiting for hel in alicent’s rooms. i know someone is going to make the point of ‘why didn’t helaena scream or run?’ and yes partly. guess we had to slander alicent in another way right?

but alas, i am thankful that a prediction of the scene didn’t came true: no children being forcefully stripped. that would’ve sent me over the edge. they implied it but no child actors were harmed in this episode

omg the sounds of the head cutting and jaehaerys’ muffled sounds i wanna cry

helaena is so lost and the castle is a maze and nobody’s there and she’s lost lost lost and running with jaehaera i can’t

did she saw a vision there? when she stopped and went to alicent’s room

imagine going to comfort for your mom and she’s at it

‘return to your post lord commander’ why didn’t you criston? 🙃

also it didn’t pass me by that aegon has THREE kingsguards in addition to his four homies and his own sword. helaena had none. even if he was off duty and he’s sworn to alicent and not helaena, the lord commander is not commanding

THREE maids at the start of the episode doing absolutely nothing and none here? i’m so mad

‘they killed the boy’ :(((((

also why is helaena so disconnected? like why is she ‘able’ or is she in shock? i hope if they don’t make her go insane with pain like in the book she gets a revenge arc where she goes on dreamfyre, she deserves it.

i hope aegon kills them all.

[six-eyed-samurai]

🌸Life would be so much fun with these two psychos as your overprotective, fashion forward, freaky poser older brothers!

🌸I can think of a few words on how you'll turn out raised by these two: spoiled, coddled, well dressed, short sighted, manipulative, badass.

🌸The Haitanis were living by themselves as minors. Meals probably weren't fancy back then but all three of you would be playing hot potato with the best piece trying to give it to the other - or, well, Ran and Rindou ganging up to give it to you.

🌸Probably felt bad when you go to school (you're the only one still going) and all the girls have pretty things, new bags, non dog-eared textbooks, uniforms whose colours have faded a little. Ran tells you you're the best out of all of them, the smartest, the most beautiful, etc instead and Rindou counts their savings to get you a new pair of nice shoes.

🌸Speaking of school, Ran nearly cried the day you stopped needing to hold his hand all the way there, or so he claimed. You insist you can carry your own bag now and Rindou lectures you on the dangers of scoliosis all the way.

🌸I’m not sure about their grades academically but since they're older they still try and help you study. Well, Rindou does, because Ran has a bad habit of getting distracted and dragging you along. By distracted I mean napping.

🌸Ran loves doing your hair! When you were younger he’d be the one to brush and braid it, figuring out how to do whatever struck your fancy from magazines, secretly feeling nostalgic and sad when you outgrow pigtails and no longer match with him. Still though, you two divas are always making Rindou drive to the salon and pay for it all. You want to dye? Go for it! You want a perm? Whatever you want! Bleach?…uh, no, bad for your scalp :)

🌸Rindou and you gossip a lot - mostly about Ran and how you’re both tired of his stinky ass sleeping twenty four hours. Aside from that you think your brother’s got the best taste in music, even if you’ll never say it now, and Rindou takes pride in you idolizing him and his DJing skills. You don’t understand how someone so great at that hates going to karaoke so much but there we go. You’re very embarrassed when he catches you singing and records it.

🌸When they got into gang stuff and the whole ruling Roppongi thing they didn't have time anymore, but they tried to have either one of them fetch you from school no matter what. No, don't walk home with Yukiko! Nii-chan can get you!

🌸You know those annoying moms at sports games going all “hey, look over there, that's my kid” every other minute and love yapping about said kid's accomplishments? Yeah, that's why the Haitanis are really unpopular with the other parents when they attend your competitions. Not just because they're delinquents. They're noisy delinquents.

🌸My own bro has this thing of yelling stuff at me like “SOCIALIZE!”, “IT WAS RIGHT THERE, GOD, WHY?!” , “NOOOOO”in front of everyone. Ran does that a lot when he's trying to get your attention, no matter whether you're outside or inside. It's all “HEY LOOK WHAT I GOT YOU”, “LITTLE SISSSSSSSSS”, “PRINCESS, YOU FORGOT YOUR LUNCH!!!”until you and Rindou beg him to stop. Please.

🌸They’re very, very proud that you know how to defend yourself so well, both physically and verbally, from bullies looking to harass the Haitanis’ kid sister or mean girls picking on your outfit or bitching about how the little princess always needs saving. Rindou had to stifle his smirk when he saw you beat down the creep that wouldn't take no for an answer with a move he taught you himself because someone needs to be responsible and reprimand you that violence, is not, the answer!

“But you're in a gang, nii-chan.”

“That's different. Next time someone's following you around, I'm beating him up.”

🌸Low-key I feel like they'd turn a blind eye on whatever less than appropriate stuff you're doing. Oh, you wanna stuff shaving cream into Usagi’s locker for talking shit about your friends? No, Ran definitely didn't see you stuffing a can into your bag. What's this Rindou hears about you copying off someone's test paper? Nonsense. He helped you study this topic himself.

🌸No way, absolutely not, their baby sister is too innocent and pure for such things.

🌸But when it comes to breaking their rules, nuh uh. They're not gonna stand for it; sorry, it sucks but it sucks. No involvement with gangs. No smoking. No skipping school without a valid reason (”Yes, princess, going to a cafe with your beloved older brother is a valid reason, now let's get going.”). If you need money just ask. Again, no interacting with gang members.

🌸Most of all: no dating.

🌸If you've never gotten a confession and feel left out that all your friends are dating, sad bad luck, sorrows, sorrows. Ran will comfort you and assure you you're a catch, beyond a catch, an angel no one deserved, but secretly be glad.

🌸If you have, though, and it's not a secret admirer, Ran and Rindou will show up at school looking for him/her and give him/her a nice chat. With a baton. And Rindou casually bringing up all the ways to hide a body.

🌸Heaven forbid you actually have a boyfriend/girlfriend.

🌸The actual problem isn’t that they’re against that. Ran’s the best person you want when preparing for a date and you know one text will have Rindou running if he/she tries anything uncomfortable. Your number one hype men, although you’re tired of yelling at them no, okay, stop, you’re not gonna do the nasty, so stop will all these protection warnings!

🌸No, the problem is that they have the most unrealistic expectations for whoever your (unfortunate) crush will be. You’re not saying their (impossible) ideals don’t sound pleasant, because who doesn’t want the perfect partner, but they don’t exist and do they really have to be so nitpicky about whoever you bring home?

🌸Their baby sister is just too pure and innocent for such things!

🌸Moving on they’re extremely against bringing you into gang life. You know vaguely what they get up to, but otherwise they keep their lips sealed. The idiots showing up at their house for revenge from a rival gang had their asses handed back to them twice as much for involving their sister. The rest learnt to stay away from you. On the one occasion they had to bring you along very reluctantly, Tenjiku low ranks learnt the hard way not to make a comment on you, not just because you gave them a nosebleed (from a punch, not…yeah). They’d only trust Kakucho with you…Izana, not so much, but what can they do if boss wants to induct you in?

🌸What happens when they go to juvie? Ran and Rindou worried sick about you, of course. You’re equal parts tears and indignant anger when they’re taken away and they’re pretty alarmed because how are you going to make it on your own? How? How?!

🌸I think it’s after they’re released the dynamics that had been changing since the day they became delinquents become more obvious; you’re the one taking care of them now, not the other way around. Ran doesn’t order takeout anymore, you make bento. You no longer need Rindou to come fix a flat tire, in fact you take his bike to the shop for maintenance. Ran grumbles that you’re pulling at his hair too hard with the comb and Rindou grudgingly lets you do his highlights over the sink. When they’re back, battered and bruised you set down whatever you’re doing with a complaining sigh to bandage them up, pass ice and wipe off the blood.

🌸You’re the most precious thing in their lives. Ran and Rindou aren’t ever letting you go, get hurt or worse. You’re going to get into a good college, graduate, get a good job and everything great in life, far, far away from the mess in theirs.

🌸For now they’re content to lazily smile and watch you those off in between them, horror movie long forgotten and popcorn crumbs all over your hoodie.

[therabbitthatpostthings]

Live Arcane Reaction; Act 3:

Ep 7: Thank god the killmonger cut only exist in the hell dimension- don’t let them give you a fuck ass cut Ekko.

Powder my princess- IS THAT VANDER’S FINE ASS

OH MY GOD MILO CLAGGOR!!!

Jayce my princess I never doubted you. I knew the Hexcore fucked you up girl🫶🏾

Goddammit every frame in this show is a painting

VI MY POOKIE BEAR WHY

There is something so heartbreaking about the Bridge of Progress being used as an actual progression between the two cities. An olive branch. What could have been.

Jayce istg they do not want you to be happy-

BRO HE JUST WANTED TO PLAY WITH SOME MAGIC-

“Viktor is the mage” theory you might just have merit

Arcane artists I will see you in HELL for that Viktor/Jayce parallel of them literally building themselves up, morphing their damaged bodies to move forward.

Ekko and Jinx girls enjoy your SCRAPS-

WHAT WE COULD OF BEEN GODDAMMIT! FUCK!!!!!

Actual fucking tears in my eyes- FUCK THEY COULD HAVE BEEN SO CUTE- also the hard cut to Jayce and the Hexcore glitching like TV glitches as the universe breaks down.

MY BOY JUST WANYES TO PLAY IN SOME MAGIC!

Thank god he didn’t die in that universe too I would have crashed out Powder deserves to be- SHE KEPT THE CRYSTAL!?

Ep 8: oh thank god my Pookies is alive- IS ANYTHING SACRED- why the fit kinda eat tho….

I need everyone to understand I was SO happy about Mel being alive that I barely understood anything those mages said. I was just happy my babygirl is alive. GOD THAT MAKES THE FLOWER IMAGERY IN THE OPENING MUCH BETTER.

I just remembered Isha is dead... FUCK HIEMERDINGER DIED TOO 😭

Nooo Vander- NO VIKTOR- nice to know I am not immune to indoctrination.

Huck cannot catch a break omfg

LORIS MY BELOVED 🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾

Hi traitor- omg Cait cute hairstyle

The divorce is not going well for these two.

Jayce and Mel have not seen each other for god knows how long- DONT FUCKING YELL AT HER JUST CAUSE YOUR SITUATIONSHIP WENT SOUTH!

The throuple is back together and it’s TOXICCCC

I would just like to point out that when Viktor said this all started with Jayce, the parallels between Jayce and Ekko is still going. Like I could on for pages about these two at this point.

Fuck they made this Yaoi TOXIC-

FUCK THEY MADE THIS MAGIC TOXIC- is it wrong still stand by Viktor. Like I know he’s wrong but he’s so fine. Jayce and Viktor’s parallels, Jayce and Ekko- lord.

FUCKING FINALLY THE SISTERS ARE- well shit

Jayce and Mel, I never doubted this ship. I never doubted this relationship. I thought they were good for each, the rest of the world is just full of haters.

Sevika thank god they dumb bitches get on my nerves, I need someone with a functioning brain cell to lead us to salvation.

I’m gonna be on my fucking deathbed talking about the Zaunites joining Piltover to fight a battle they done have to, to save their homes- to make Progress.

Vi, it’s okay- OH MY GOD

Istg this show cannot- I’m- Ambessa my love I’m still reeling from the gays, give me a moment. VANDER MY LOVE NOOO! SINGED I'LL SEE YOU IN HELL!

Oh fuck- we’re in it now

Ep 9:

EKKO THANK GOD- most stressful 3 mins of my life.

Honestly I don’t trust these dumb bitches at all. Jayce and Vi are like 2 for 2 on losing fights. Ekko save us Ekko. I had hope on Sevika but her leaving is so real. She has been let down by these people so many times- GERT NOOOOO

LORIS NOOOOOO

Thank god fish guy made it

Ambessa rises from the ashes like a demon- I KNEW IT I KNEW THAT BITCH WAS A TRAITOR!

GOD IS A WOMAN AND HER NAME IS MEL MEDARDA!!!

YEA JINX! SEVIKA IM SORRY I DOUBTED YOU QUEEN NEVER AGAIN I SWEAR!

There is something so special to me about piano boy being the one to make the shot. Like the smallest thing can make a difference, anyone can rise to the occasion.

Of course Ambessa is one step ahead

I have issues, I still think Viktor is so hot rn.

I know my girls are getting their asses beat rn but let’s appreciate they let the girls get down and dirty in a fight. No pretty fighting- my bitches scrap-

Bow your heads. We lost THE bad bitch today.

Omfg there’s still like 20 mins left

I should have known this plan was gonna go to shit the minute Jayce and Vi sat next to each other.

Praying for the salvation for my girl, Sevika I promised not to- FUCK

Ekko please save these idiots- SAVE US EKKO.

Jayce understanding that he was the soldier in the ash like yeah dummy- DID IT CLICK YET- Please let Viktor be the mage, I will not let this theory die.

Fuck I wanna side against Viktor but he looks gorgeous in the Arcane.

Oop Jayvik nation rise.

EKKO THANK GOD THATS MY BOY SAVIOR

HE WAS THE MAGE THE WHOLE TIME-

I’m actually in tears this isn’t a bit, like I’m actually crying

Viktor I never doubted you, I never forsaken you, I never hated you, I never turned against you, I never thought less of you. He could have actually succeeded and I would have stood by him.

Oh damn Jayvik nation rise for real, I was just joking the first time-

JINX I NEVER DOUBT- FUCK

This show is so beautiful, every scene a painting. Mel in all noxian gear while still wearing her purple eyeshadow, a mix of her roots but also the promise to move forwards and look ahead.

Yall im so fucking stressed and there’s only 3 minutes left.

No one talk to me for the next few days- I’m going through some shit okay-

[pumpkinsy0]

I'm in tech week for a musical and I JUST NOW forgot a set change (Stage manager was NOT happy 😭) so that's how I'm doing... ANYWAY, hcs for Curly joining the Curtis brothers on a vacation?? Mix of Curly being a little shit AND him and Pony having sweet moments? Maybe cuddling by a fire or smth? Thank youu!!

i hope everything i smooth sailing from there and everything goes ur way anon,,,gods speed🙏🏽🙏🏽

•the curtis’ were going camping as mostly a gift to pony for doing so well, yknow to get away from everything!!! take it as the closest hes gonna get to the country side for now. and theres a LOT of things curly would do, but go camping??? not rlly one of em, but a week???without pony??? booooooo borriinngg

•curly QUICKLY rethought this bc when he said he wanted to come along, pony said that they werent going to like, a decently well known camping ground, they were just gonna go into some “apparently safe” forest, camp down for a bit, then go. and curly was NOTTTT rocking w that, if u have CURLY thinking thats not safe, triple check ur plan dude😭😭

•pony was saying “nooooo cmon its fine, i already begged darry u have to go now” plus curly already asked tim and had his things packed so he was way too far along to just back down and NOT look like a wimp so he accepted his fate,,,wherever that comes,,, if thise white boys kill him in the forest everyone knows who did it,,,

•ANYWAYS, the forest was pretty far, so there was a small roadtrip moment for all four of em!! curly and ponys hungry asses ate more snacks than they were supposed to but thats probably for the best bc in between kinda sugar crashing and play wrestling and talking, they just passed out and gave darry and soda much needed peace (and photo material)

•by the time they got there, it was almost night so they had to hurry and make their tents. u already knowwww there was a passive aggressive fight between soda and curly over who was sharing what tent, but bc darry just wanted pony to relax, he just let him choose and pony chose curly cause look, he always cuddles up to soda, he can change it up these few nights, also darry was kinda hoping pony chose curly always he doesnt wanna sleep next to curly that would b so awkward

•the whole night darry couldnt sleep bc he heard pony and curly playing 21 questions except they barely rlly played it bc all curly was doing was making shitty oneliners and innuendos. darry heard curly gearing up to tell a brokeback mountain sex joke and took that as his queue to just fall asleep

•pony and curly has snuck out to go swim ONCE, and pony was scared shitless and that was PERFECT for curly. he could pretend to b the #protector while his babygirl clung to him, he was thinking “JACKPOT!!!”, DID they get caught later on the next day when darry said he heard them??? yes but sooooo worth it

•personally i like to hc curly as a guy who loves insects, so when he sees them he starts ranting about the type theyre looking at. darry and soda r half paying attention while ponys thinking “yea im making out w this guy later”

•and then curlys the kinda guy who loves the night time, and he can finally see more stars without the light pollution,,,ik hes lovin it and ponys thinking curly AND the sky is pretty. bonus points if theres a shooting star they see

•during the day curly and pony tend to get a liilllll lost while on their walks, and curly tried doing that thing where u leave breadcrumbs but some stupid squirrel just ate the trail so they had to yell for help

•i like to hc that when they used to live in haiti, curly used to visit his family in the country side sometimes so he knows some #lifehacks to help make things easier, SO YKNOW WHAT??? darry and soda can call curly many things, but useless???? aint one of em, darry and soda had some new found respect for him

•ESPECIALLY when it comes to dinner, bc if his experience curlys good at fishing and can make himself a fire ANNNDDD cook the fish w it, not that the curtis bros couldnt do that, but it woulda took wayyyyyy longer,,,,thats ponys man right there,,,woaw,,,,

•had the fire going long enough to cook s’mores which rlly was one of the only things pushing curly to go camping w em, right next to the reason of being w pony, him and pony filled UP on those things and cuddled hung out near the fire after wards, they both fell asleep there and had to b semi carried to their tents!!!

•darry and soda even had the decency to manhandle them into cuddling FOR them, to b fair the night was cold but still, how sweet of em