#like as far as im aware these are just names ppl have

[swordfaery]

anyway my favourite thing about dead men fanfiction is the wildly different characters we all write. like. not even the ones who have been dead for years and have so little actual characterisation but even the ones who were alive in canon were probably very different one hundred, two hundred, three hundred years ago. also theyre under characterised in fiction. also we are all just having fun

[fardf150]

fuck

[etoilesombre]

Hi im a new here i finally watched black sails after someone convinced me. And im changed. I'm. Yeah. I'm not who i was before. It's a bizarrely good show?

I'm so so so glad that so many ppl on ao3 agree with me that flint and silver need to fuck. Have fucked. Will fuck.

This will be all i think about for the next month or so.

If you have fic recs do let me know. I'm in dire need.

Hi my friend and welcome to hell! It's the best, right? ("Month" is a HIGHLY optimistic estimate about how long this will consume your brain...)

So honored that you asked for recs! I don't think I've ever compiled a general list of favorites, I had a great time and I think I'm happy with the results. This is by no means comprehensive, and obviously HIGHLY reflective of my own tastes, which are... uh.. I am known to not enjoy nice things very much. I invite others to reblog with their own favorites. Here we go...

Notes: These are in vaguely chronological order. I'm including word count and brief descriptions so you know what you're getting into but no warnings or anything, that's all on AO3. They are all silverflint and all explicit (I think, there might be one or two 'mature' in there but, this is the they need to, have, and will fuck list.) I didn't include any of my own work because presumably that's how you found my blog so you're aware, but I do have a pinned list, and if you want recs for mine or to talk about any of these just message, I will talk about silverflint all day.

Overall Recommendations:

The Most Unexpected Things by forbiddenarchives (~20k words) I think this one is a great starting point. It is very.. fic flavored fic, if that makes sense, in a great way. Hits the spot. The author's description is "season 2 if everyone were 5000% hornier" and that is accurate. Note this is marked as unfinished, but the place it wraps up feels totally reasonable to me.

As Good as Gone by spinninginfinityboy (~5.5k words) Complicated hot weird semi-hate sex on the way to Charles Town. A thing with a Spanish Dubloon that is emblazoned on my brain forever.

Combat by equestrianstatue (~10k words) A two part series, which I think captures the push-pull early frenemies vibe of s1-2 perfectly. Also the writing itself is stellar.

All alone in a moonlit shanty by PrimalScream (4.3k) Celebrating a good day hunting, Flint gets very drunk and tells the crew a dirty story. Silver tries to put him to bed, but he has different ideas. By far one of the lighter things on this list.

after the winnowing by princesskay (~14k) Set after Silver loses his leg, early in his recovery. Silk pajamas, multiple orgasms and overstimulation as well as their usual codependent fuckery.

What It Feels Like Not to Hurt by Robotboy (~9k) Another recovery fic. As the author says, it's 9k of slowburn watersports but really it's about Silver's pain and autonomy and humiliation and. Just. Even if it's not your usual cup of tea it's hot, give it a try.

vigia by doomcountry (~3k) A short, perfect rendering of their dynamic during early s3 raid times. Heartwrenching character study, excellent porn.

The Sack of James Flint by princesskay (~107k) So, yes, this is a novel length sub!Flint cock and ball torture series. I would make the argument that it is one of the best character studies in the fandom, for real. Absolutely worth your time, but fuck, it hurts your heart as much as your captain's balls in the end.

Concurrence by ember_firedrake (~2.5k) Mid s3. The first time they call each other by their first names. Now, that's not actually a thing I think they do, but, good porn and lower angst.

appreciation by nysscientia (~8k) Flint cultivates a certain aloof persona, but Silver sees right through it, and eventually they kiss about it.

Don't Fear The Ships (Fear The Black) by Farasha (~10k) - Silverflint use learning to sail as a coded way to flirt and talk about feelings (and eventually they kiss about it).

A Ship Is A Republic by Robotboy (~20k) A slow burn fic set during the inter-season sword training times. Love this dynamic, this author does power bottom Flint and sub Silver so fucking well.

deliverance is ours by the light of the stars by piratecaptainraven (3.1k) Flint sees Silver and Madi together, and doesn't stop watching when he should. They don't technically fuck in this, but its SO much pining, and the writing is poetic and gorgeous.

frail and fragile bars by ajaxthegreat (~21k) Possibly the hottest thing I've ever read, this rewrote my brain chemistry. Slow burn-ish. It captures that late season love and dependence and resentment and power struggle.

Cold, Dark, Depraved by notfelix (~10k) When fucking fixes absolutely nothing. This hurts in a way that feels, to me, similar to canon. I hate it (affectionate).

Opportunist by anonymous (~6.1k) This was part of the kinkmeme event (see below) and it fucking changed me. If I recommend one fic and only one fic to process the ending, it's this. It's awful. It's necrophilia and light cannibalism. It's the only thing I can imagine happening after, if Silver actually shoots Flint on that island. It makes me feel bad in the best way.

hand in unlovable hand by brinnanza, Jaynovz (~9.9k) Affectionately known as the worst ending AU, this is actually a great followup to the last one. How Silver copes, after Skeleton Island.

Bonus: AUs. I don't generally read AUs, but these two worked for me, in very different ways that still felt very silverflint.

did the twin flame bruise paint you blue by Jaynovz (138k) Novel length mod AU where silverflint broke up, and we see their relationship along two different timelines, before and after. Toxic fucked up goodness, lots of BDSM dynamics, bonus silvervane! All set in NYC.

holy ghost fire by ajaxthegreat (~52k) Appalachia horror au! The author clearly knows the area, and silverflint is already a ghost story, so it works really well. If you've ever been there you'll know how right it feels, if not, just trust me.

extra bonus: fic event collections and rec lists

kinkmeme

built on sand

beach blanket black sails

@jaynovz has also compiled a number of much more specific rec lists, which can be found at #jay's esoteric rec lists

[candy8448]

Lu lgbt headcanons Because im feeling very gender today:

Legend:

Genderfluid, any pronouns

Bisexual and demiromantic

Used to be in a relationship with Marin

In a relationship currently with Ravio but they haven't decided exactly how far their relationship goes just yet

Never wears trousers, even on a masculine day, just never. Nope. Wears a ton of jewlery

Probably has some magic ring or something with a gem that he can change the colour of to represent what pronouns they want to use

Wild

Also uses any pronouns

Decided to not use a name or label for gender

Before the shrine was probably not given any opportunity to explore any gender identities or sexual orientation, so went as a cis man

In a queer platonic relationship with Flora

Ace

Sky

Bigender, i saw this headcanon once and im stealing it for self projection reasons

She/he pronouns with a slight preference to he

Bisexual, polyamory

He, Zelda and Groose are all in a relationship together (Zelda is mostly straight and Groose hasn't decided yet)

Hyrule

Seen hcs that fairies aren't born with a gender and get to choose theirs

Intersex (though was treated more femininly by most of his sisters and mothers)

Nonbinary and trans male

Uses he/they/fae pronouns

Time

Saw hcs that the kokiri dont really pay attention to gender

Agender

Uses he/him pronouns for simplicity as that was what people used when he first left kokiri forest

Will not mind if someone uses whatever pronouns, will not correct since he doesnt really have a connection to any gender

Pan, again since he doesnt really recognise gender he doesnt have a preference to what he is romantically intrested in but he is married to Malon

Seen hcs that he used to have a crush on Sheik and sure, i like it when its written as a goofy childhood crush thing

Four

Cis male, ik most ppl hc them as the most gnc but i like this

They/them pronouns, they use them as plural pronouns but not many people actually know that

The colours themselves and mostly cis male though as individuals

Not sure their sexual orientation

They are at least 1/4 gay (looking at you, Vio)

Warriors

Trans male

Aroace, did not have a fun experience with that whole Cia thing and has just sworn off any kind of romantic or sexual relationships

Wind

Demiboy

He/they pronouns (is experimenting with the they/them pronouns and mostly prefers the he/him ones)

Straight as far as he is aware for now, might have a slight crush on Tetra but will deny it with his entire being

Twilight

Nonbinary, He/they pronouns

Had/has a big crush on Midna

In situations or aus where they are able to be with Midna, he is dating Midna and Midna is dating Dusk, but Twi and Dusk are not dating

Ive had this post in my drafts and completely forgot about it lol

[duckieduccss]

NEW KAIJU OC?!?!

Well, yea technically. Basically i was interested in figuring out how id go with making my own kaiju. At first i wasnt sure where to go for designing one. So i chose to base it off another existing kaiju for inspiration. I kinda wanted to go for a dragon type kaiju (i like dragons) and the only thing i could think of was Ghidorah so i went with that (now that i think about it more, I could’ve maybe used Manda too prob but oh well, Ghidorah was still a good option). I added some different details to mine that make it unique to the og Ghidorah

My idea was that it could potentially be a relative to Ghidorah (being of the same species) but still far apart from one another to the point they arent all that aware of the other existing (theyre in for a shock when & if they do encounter each other lol). This version actually relies on cosmic energy derived from such sources like stars & generally anything that produce some form of energy within the vast universe (basing it off how Ghidorah themselves originally came from space & this variant being much more dependent on that factor). It stores that energy & relatively stays in a dormant stage for an extended period of time until when faced with the challenge to defend itself or fight off those it deems as a danger. Then it would release all that ginormous amount of space energy that manifests itself as a rapidly expanding glow of extremely bright light. Enough to cause extreme damage & bring down the opposition. It can gather energy by using special crystals it can grow (took that also as inspiration but from Space Godzilla) & become as some form of attracting & absorbing the energy. In a way, the energy is like its main source of food & energy to maintain itself (right after releasing a lot of it during its final attack of using that glow, it would be put in a highly vulnerable state if not recovered by regaining some energy back soon enough). For the most part, they mostly sleep (being lazy 24/7 just like me fr lmao) to keep all that energy but can be potentially dangerous if disturbed or provoked in some manner

(Here’s a better closer look at their faces. Realized the canvas’ too big to properly see each of them-)

The name of this kaiju you may be wondering???

It’s Ryudorah

(Yea i know im the most creative person out there. I combined another nickname i use for myself and just added the end part of Ghidorah’s name to make it clear it’s related to the other kaiju. I couldn’t think of anything else im sorry😭)

And also each head has its own individual name:

Do, Re & Mi

(Named after intervals in the musical scale (ex: Do, Re, Mi, Fa, So, La, Ti, Do)

Did i mention this kaiju can also technically sing too :)

I did have a lot of fun with coming up with the concept for them (tho it honestly took longer in designing them due to a busy schedule ive been put in as of late & finding the time to finish it) but im glad to finally be able to share this with you all. Hopefully I can share more about them soon (i have a whole google doc’s worth of lore lmao) & probably draw them again (tho maybe a lot more simplified by then). Didn’t wanna overwhelm ppl with the huge amount of info so I’ll prob slowly reveal more over time.

[Another thing too is that i still am new to the fandom (tho with more knowledge from getting to learn more from the source material) & most of this i gathered from already know stuff i knew. Tho im also open to feedback & maybe some ideas to add onto my own kaiju. So id very much appreciate it if there’s any suggestions from you guys ^^⭐️]

(I’ll only be taking constructive criticism btw. Anything hateful will obv be ignored)

[theninth09]

So I have been in the whole Thiam things quite a while how and there is specific tag that got me wondering and it is the Jewish Theo Raeken tag the reason bcs where does this coming? Is this just a tag that an author like just created and ppl thinks “oh hey! This is really interesting!” And decide so write more about? Or this there any specific theories behind it????

hi yeah, that theo is Jewish is a headcanon. im pretty sure that its theoceanismyinkwell (they're under the same username on tumblr too!) who came up with that since most of the fics under that tag are by them! i dont know much about this headcanon, but theoceanismyinkwell is actually Jewish themselves, so if you have more questions about that, maybe try sending them an ask instead :)

in canon we dont really get to know much about theo's religion or ethnicity. theo just gets read as a white guy, which, well, he is. cody christian, his actor, is actually indigenous (his mother is penobscot) but teen wolf in general likes to cast actors that are racially ambiguous. froy gutierrez, nolan's actor, is of caxcan (indigenous to mexico) and mexican descent. victoria molores, hayden's actress, is of mexican descent as well. kelsey chow, tracy's actress, is chinese (im ignoring her claiming she's native american bc that's a whole controversy and im white european myself so its Definitely not my place to comment on that.)

my point is, all the characters ive listed can get read as white if you really want to. they're just racially ambiguous enough that you can ignore any non-white features they may have. and with the way teen wolf likes to be racist in general (the way they treat literally all of their Black characters, the way they treat kira and the incredibly poor way they handle their inspirations of asian and native american mythology) this feels... interesting to me. its definitely a choice they made.

sorry, i got of track. the racism in teen wolf makes me incredibly angry. canonically, theo mentions once that he's an atheist in s6ep9 when the sheriff threatens to shoot him "until god won't even recognize him" to which theo says "im an atheist. fire at will." if hes just always been an atheist or if his time underground possibly made him stop believing in higher beings- who knows. i think its a very fun tidbit of information about him since his name, theodore, means "gift of god." how ironic. (heres a post where i briefly talk about that btw)

anyway. that theo is Jewish is just a hc, and not an actual theory as far as i am aware! its definitely fun though. since we dont really know a lot about theo, especially his childhood and his life post-canon, i think giving him these kinds of hcs is so cool. adding aspects to his character to further explore him.

[grossillygirl]

You’re not incorrect that they are the lesser of two evils. But the lesser of 2 evils is still evil 😭 like don’t get me wrong, I’m frustrated at American politics in general, I didn’t mean to be aggro at you specifically.

But I feel like people are seeing Biden/Harris as the less bad option and throwing full support behind them to make sure Trump stays out (which is fine, he can go fuck himself with a pineapple). But then people are so far into the “we need to support them completely to win!!” mindset that people are being toxically positive about the relatively minor wins that the administration has had, and completely glossing over all the terrible shit that the administration has allowed/encouraged. Ideally, Biden wouldn’t have even run for reelection this time so we’d have a bigger pool of potential candidates to consider, but his pride got the best of him and he didn’t drop out until the last minute, so we’re stuck with Harris as the candidate (basically continuing many of the current policies) rather than having voters select a replacement candidate.

Again, not directed at you because I know you’re not even in the US, and I also know you’ve also reblogged pro-Palestine posts to help raise awareness. I’m mostly just frustrated at the toxically positive, blue MAGA subset of the Democrat voting base that is willing to flush all of their values down the tube to ensure that the president has a (D) next to their name instead of an (R), rather than pushing for a better candidate that will actually push for positive changes 😞

I genuinely agree with you 100% I FELT THE SAME WAY ABOUT LABOUR 😭😭😭😭😭😭 thankfully i always saw posts saying "yes labours better but we should vote for green cus theyre ACTUALLY GOOD" but idk people are fucking idiotic.

But yeah i think the way ppl blindly have a toxic positive mindset about the democratic + labour party is insane. As if they don't actively support genocide.....? And push policies that also hurt sp kany of us as citizens (who also voted for them??) like what??? Like the privatisation of healthcare being pushed is so obvious in the UK now its insane. Anyway yeah im sorry everyones shit snd no one cares about the genocides occuring around the world. But yeah i promise im not stupid so dont call me ignorant or imply it because im not. You couldve just asked me questions but yeah i accept ur apology🫶🏽

[blueiight]

I was reading your tags to dre's published ask. Do you think while writing about these blood sucking monsters, Anne deliberately made one of them a former slave master? I mean the way this man during his mortal times had benefited by preying on the black race and the reflection of it in his fate where he is now in literal terms an entity who survives by preying on people? Or is it like twilight ( movies) where Jasper's past as a confederate soldeir is just dropped as if it's the most casual thing to shrug away.

( something is up with vampire media and all of them being connected to slave trade my god. Either it is a social commentary or people really do not have any self awarenesses?

i dont know about twilight book or movie to make a meaningful comparison to louis’s book counterpart. i wish i knew. and tbh, its hard to prescribe authorial intent on a dead woman who wrote a sprawling epic of 20+ books for 50 years , especially with shifting perspectives , namely pivoting away from louis to lestat as her MC bc of what fantasy/POV was more interesting to her. but i think in the first book there was some intention there, i cant just say how much. lestat wants to hunt the runaway slaves along the freniere plantation, and louis discourages him from doing it not out of compassion for enslaved people (which would be condescending and abysmal writing for a slaveowning character), but for his proximity to the freniere’s as fellow planters. ive talked about it a lot how its really interesting in the first 2 books that the american planter is created both literally + vampirically by the european aristocrat.. and theyre both parasitic beings in relation to the enslaved people, eventually draining them+ burning the plantation down. iwtv early book louis is resentful of lestat in part bc he thought lestat wanted his plantation, but when he learns who lestat is + where he came from, the power and will he has. hes far more genial to him. its a very dark book, and i think the fact that these characters are so vicious + melancholic is intentional on the authors part. i dont know how much race based chattel slavery is meaningfully explored from the perspective of the slaveowner, but book louis thinking of people in his captivity as fixtures, as creepy ‘things’ more proximate to the supernatural bc of their ‘african nature’ (that had yet to be ‘trained’ out of them) is a very probable, chilling, and haunting perspective of a former slaveowner to take even a hundred and some years removed from it. or if we take it as book louis immersing himself in his perspective @ the time. either way. and its pathetic when fans try to flatten book louis into ‘he was a good slaveowner’ cuz at that point theyre just conflating the movie with the book. i kinda joke that book louis is the vampire it girl bc he was such a terrible mortal LOL. im still indeterminate on the exact mode or purpose, or how much it was just about the aesthetic of gothic horror (re: the earth’s a savage garden). especially bc later books fixate on very discrete modes and metaphors of servitude/subjugation ‘being a slave to the blood’ is a recurring motif running antiparallel with the motif of ‘purifying the african/asian/foreign’ (through ‘admixture’ with the ‘european’) (s/o poacher bro gabi + talamasca bro dave ig) and in later works, theres the cycle of slavery through marius & armand.. marius, whos mother was a slave, purchases armand. chattel slavery took inspo from the romans in the idea of maternal based slave caste inheritance.. idk. idk. ive had very long rambly convos w ppl on here in the past (& im still a bit embarrased abt it) on this, but i think the reasons why fans dont rly get into it is cuz most ppl got into these books at a young age + was just into the cool lore or the queer shit and were able to handwave things as just aesthetic/era/quirky anne things etc. idk.

[ace-hell]

Something very frustrating about the whole i/p is how people view this place

The MENA is the only place in the WORLD where ppl try to rewrite its history and force indigenous-ity over its colonizers just bc the colonizers aren't "white European". instead of accepting the place was colonized and moving on and try to learn the native cultures and stuff

The brits know they colonized america and a big part of the world

The germans know they caused the holocaust

The mongols know about chinggis khan horrible rein and the massacre of millions

The american know they are not natives to america

We all know about the greek, roman and ottoman empire were conquering and colonizing land

So why can't arabs accept that they are also colonizers? Its ok, every nationality did horrible shit throughout history but instead of accepting it they just force themselves into nativity- ofc with time they mingled with the natives and most of them are mixed- but it doesn't cancel anything. Now the west and practically the whole world CHOSES to ignore history. As if the fact that you are not light skinned/white/european means that you can NEVER oppress or do something horrible.

Altho arabic is fund by different native languages it still originated in arabia peninsula(saudi arabia) just like islam and the arab identity. But bc it happened almost 1500 years ago and sound so far in the past people just choose to ignore it and in the end, with the israel-palestine conflict it hurts jews and our history bc no arabic is not indigenous. Its not nablus, its sh'hem and was called that name even BEFORE abraham was even born. Even islam isn't indigenous the canaan- Christianity and judaism are.

Im not shaming or anything but self awareness is important.

Bc we all from the same area then ofc there will be A LOT of similarity with the clothes, food, music etc just like there are a lot of similarities between Japanese and chinese culture altho they all are different its just NORMAL. The problem is that bc jews were colonized so much, everyone destroyed everything we have, bc of the diaspora jews gathered the cultures they grew up in from different countries and brought it with them to israel that's why "israeli culture" is made of a lot of different cultures worldwide, not bc "they stole it"

Israel is the ONLY place in the world that got successfully decolonised and rebuild and the world has never been angrier about that. Just mind blowing

[leefi]

The Flower That Bloomed Nowhere Read-through | Part 1: Chapters 1-14

Part 1: 1-14 | Part 2: 14-22 | Part 3: 22-34 | Part 4: 34-64 | Part 5: 64-80 | Part 6: 81-90 | Part 7: 90-100 | Part 8: 100-127 (caught up here)

Hi!!!! I've been reading through this webnovel after seeing @ot3's pitch for it and started writing down some thoughts on the characters and worldbuilding and imminent murdering. This story is very, very long and I only reacted up to about chapter 33, so most of my thoughts will involve the worldbuilding and less the murder mystery aspect -- so if you're looking for theorizing you won't find much of that here. Since I'll be continuing eventually, I wanted to post what I did make note of to revisit later!

Most of these are not marked by chapter/section because I was lazy and I'm not sure how easy it will be to follow as a result, but everything is chronological.

everyone here is hijabi mashallah

The visual I'm getting of the solar system/local system/dimension they inhabit is kind of a blend of steampunk and fantasy and uhh some secret third thing. With the walls of their "universe" painted in that puella dollhouse witch lair style. Does the sun bounce around like a screensaver. Does it orbit their earth or is it on a fixed axis flung out into “space”? Does “space” even exist anymore? I’m assuming they’re in an enclosed area that they've created. Do they actively use arcane resources to keep objects (ie star and planets) sustaining themselves, or have they made them self sufficient?

everyone is so mean to Ptolema leave her alone what the fuckk let a bimbo live i want to kill you all you’re so annoying. Ptolema I WOULD be your friend and not ask all these weird ass questions. and we would hold hands and skip and giggle

Yes shes an airhead nepo baby but you guys could try doing anything other than snickering and rolling your eyes whenever she says stupid shit. If she starts arguing back about government war crimes during the Revolution or something then you have my blessing to beat her ass!

I HATE kamsurepa i HATE her i HAYE Her and her stupid ass name

Ran and Su have no chemistry its insane that theyre always hanging out every conversation is like uhhh (awkward silence) (rude comment from Ran) *Su voice* wow she gets me so well. every time they talk im like what the fuck just happened.

Su’s internal narration is too self aware for me. it’s like she talks like she knows she’s a character? or something. it's self-deprecating in a very bizarre way

im sorry i don’t know if i can continue with this. i know too many med students irl and these characters are literally pissing me off. compliments to the author for realism you knocked it out of the park

Oh, thank you very much!" Kam said, reverting back to her smiley-diplomatic form for a moment before stepping away from the counter and continuing as she handed us the cards. "...as far as it seems to me, the desire to reproduce is essentially an immature form of pursuing life-extension - this idea that you'll 'live on through your children' that's patently pseudo-mysticism justifying what is ultimately an animal instinct." ⬇️ I’m going to grab her ginger head and swing her around like bowser in mario 64. SHUT UPPPPP SHUT UP please tell me shes the one that dies

You know," I mused idly, my eyes wandering. "I think this is actually the fourth glass ceiling I've seen today." "Mm, it's true that you don't see a lot of women working in Aetheromancy," ⬇️ I know this is a small nitpick but aren’t we really far into the future why do they keep using terms like this 😭 gendered stuff like this still exists billions? trillions? of years into the future?

Why has the disco elysium skill tree randomly started talking to su. Is this her future self nagging her. Is she pulling a han sooyoung. when do we get to the various utsushikome ego deaths

"prosognostic overlap"…do ppl repeat faces? Are most people cloned at this point? What triggered the need for cloning surely medicine is advanced enough that childbirth or test tube babies are feasible? Can bodies be cloned and reinhabited to inhibit aging? Is there some disturbing psychological element to seeing someone with the same face as you? Does it make your brain short circuit? Kam mentioned having children earlier which I assume means people still give birth or have test tube babies, so i don’t know if it’s the result of cloning…but it does sound like a sameface sort of thing. What else would it be if not that though?

Actually, if they’ve figured out teleportation (whatever it was called when they went up the aetherbridge) - let's say they can atomize a body and reforming it elsewhere (though we don't know for sure yet, could also be a fold in spacetime) - transferring consciousness to an empty clone of yourself (and therefore effectively doing away with aging or death wholesale) sounds a lot more efficient and technologically practical than maintaining an organic system that naturally decays. Why keep on finding ways to push the human body past its limits when you could simply transfer a person to a new, identical vessel?

I feel like the key to immortality isn’t maintaining an organic body, which naturally tends towards systems of entropy (being a biological thing, entropy=decay), but rather delineating and separating human consciousness from its host and replicating its original environment perfectly. I’m not talking about making a copy of consciousness, which is just glorified cloning - I’m talking about *transferring* a consciousness.

You could almost call dementia itself the mind's tendency towards its own kind of entropy?

Though if you transfer a consciousness to a younger body, the dementia issue could still potentially remain. Depends on if it the author sees it as a solely physical phenomena (atrophy/buildup of inhibitors of the brain) or there's some metaphysical anomaly about amassing too many memories/"existing" too long in general

The way spellwork is described is really cool and feels super believable. Optimizing multiple concurrent spells into one “function” is intricate and sophisticated, and you have to dedicate a lot of brainpower to doing the math in your head. It’s like they’re coding the real world. I love the way lurina describes this it's awesome.

[ravenbloodshot]

Jack Grealish (Soccer Player).... Personality Reading

He gives off very introverted-extroverted vibes. When he's alone, he remains alone. But when he's around others, he interacts and engages wholeheartedly. I low-key feel like he's someone who doesn't make friends easily or at least doesn't consider ppl his friend easily. He's definitely more of a loner than others realize, probably bc of what I said above. He's not the type to be standoffish when ppl are around him, he talks and jokes around, but truly befriending others. Not likely.

This guy is very independent and in his own world/space. He's someone that can look quite intimidating if you see him chilling on his own (I saw a scene of him sitting on a bus with his headphones in and others, I assume soccer teammates, walking by him kind of afraid to sit by him). He could have resting bitch face when he doesn't smile or the type to look upset even when he's not.

There is something cool about him. I get a "ik who I am" aura from him. Although as cool as he is, this type of aura doesn't come from living an easy life. He most definitely has had a rougher childhood than most

When I first said his name while pulling cards, I "accidentally," said Drake. It reminded me of Drake Bell, the Nickelodeon child star that was assaulted and abused. Idk if Jack was a childstar himself or just had a really bad childhood, but I sadly see a similar situation.

Jack may be quite manipulative and play victim at times to get his way. Although, he may actually go through a lot and have shitty shit happen to him. He may use that to make excuses for himself, like "ik I drink too much and it's affecting how I practice and ultimately my teammates as well, but Im really dealing with a lot."

Wow...this guy has a VERY strong intuition, could be a strong manifester as well. He's the type of person to unintentionally predict or speak things into existence. You guys know how when you're calling off of work and you give an untrue excuse, he's the type to call in saying like "oh, my dad's in the hospital so I can't come in" and later that actually comes true. He can go quite far with this gift, but he can also cause a lot of destruction. I think he will use it carefully, if he was aware of it. It's possible he spoke his successful career into existence.

I looked it up to see if he has a girlfriend/wife bc I was picking up on some interesting vibes. Turns out he does, but unfortunately, he's not very faithful, and is likely very good at hiding his secret escapades. Even if his girl finds out, she's not the type to expose him, and neither are his secret lovers, so his public image will never take a hit (not for this at least). He does all of this sleeping around to fill some type of void. Definitely, a guy who needs therapy.

Princess Diana by Ice Spice is a song that fits this reading's energy

[awkward-clone]

Ok think I’ve finally got my thoughts together on the bright situation and im just gonna say it.

Its not gonna work.

It basically is just slapping on a new name on dr bright and calling it a day. Like. No matter what u do its the same character, it does nothing. Djkaktus said it himself that he was “always writing elias shaw.” That “any similarities are just a coincidence.”

So its funny seeing some of the ppl thats on board with this claim that “u cant separate the art from the artist” and yet that’s exactly what they're trying to achieve. Except, u know, the community had already done that a long time ago, ripping bright out of the hands of admin bright. So really, no change is actually being made.

Anyway with that out of the way I do want to address some concerns about djkaktus.

I’ve been looking around and have seen people mentioning that the dude:

1. Was quiet about the admin bright thing when it was happening along with actually being one of the people trying to cover it up

2. Had been banning people simply cuz they didn’t like his works

3. he’s an alleged predator

Now I havent personally found much relating to this other than people's words on it on tumblr. Tho someone on insta has told me that djkaktus was extremely quiet during the bright situation. Which yea it took an entire year after admin bright was banned to only now bring up this elias shaw bs.

Now if anyone has sources on any of this, links, screenshots, anything, it’d be a great help if ya can send it to me via replying to this post or dm-ing me. It would better help spread this awareness around.

Also regarding articles that had brights name replaced w/ SA jokes that haven’t been edited out which is something else that also has been mentioned to me, would appreciate it to get more scps/tales listed regarding that. Only got 4498 so far which has a really bad um…”butt stabbing” joke...I mostly did skim read it so I’ll have a proper read at some point.

Tldr:

- Elias Shaw is pointless and does nothing.

- People who are saying u can't separate art from artists are tryna separate bright from author.

- Djkaktus was quiet during the admin bright situation and potentially was tryna cover it up, has been banning ppl for not liking his stuff, is an alleged predator and hasnt edited out sa jokes in articles where he changed bright’s name.

Correct me if I’m wrong on anything or anything like that.

Edit: reminder to take the djkaktus stuff as a grain of salt (especially the predator allegations) as it did come from pixelated harmony who did in fact doxxed someone

Source:

Still I stand by that he was quiet about admin bright though and of course I still don’t believe the elias shaw thing is gonna work

edit edit edit: things are messy. u can look in the comments for more info I don't rlly know what to say beyond this point.

[kwangyanese]

ugh lemme get this off my chest

i came back to kpop in 2020, i had left around 2014 because the first group i was interested in (exo) was losing member after member and the fandom had split and it was just a horrible experience so i didn't want to be part of it anymore. coincidentally when i came back in 2020 aespa debuted and 2 members were added to nct (sungtaro).

i had grown fond of nct that year and i liked those 2 very much, and aespa was the first gg that i was extremely interested in from the get-go as well (in a very unhealthy way btw). the short time i was a fan of kpop as a teenager was not nearly as convulated as the one i'm experiencing now as an adult lol. just the fact that i was able to drop kpop for almost 6 years as a teen only to be brought back bc of the pandemic. the thing is even tho i liked exo very much (i still do), it was never to the point where it'd be considered parasocial. i think i only got to experience Real Parasocial and Emotional Dependence when i started to like aespa.

i think that made me realize that i was unable to care about men (especially men that i DIDNT know) in the same 'deep' and insane way that i could love women that i didn't know. anyway my point is i always saw men as objects even back when i was a teenager. especially idols. i know that it's a image they try to sell and if by chance we get to see a real human emotion then that's a plus. for me it always went down to either pretty or talented men singing and dancing and that was it. strong deep ties between them was beautiful to watch but i was always aware that i didn't know them thus i could not trust them.

what hooked me abt sungtaro was mostly bc im a contrarian and a lot of ppl were hating on them back then lol but with time i genuinely enjoyed their dynamics - sungchan's rookie mistakes and charms versus shotaro's professionalism as a dancer and lostness in being in a country he wasn't familiar with and a language he didn't speak. the two of them had it pretty rough in the beginning and i love a underdog. they barely got any activities as it was and they stayed in a limbo since they didn't have a fixed unit. it felt genuinely freshing and like things were actually gonna work out for them when smrookies (shohei, eunseok and seunghan) showed up.

theeeeeen lee sooman was removed and all plans went to shit. not only had we lost the man who knew and created the kwangya lore (which was one of the things i liked the most about aespa) but also the man who was holding sm up by its fingertips lol. yes he was committing multiple crimes while doing so but at least he would never treat or manage groups like the new management bc the mistakes they are doing now are the mistakes he did 10 years ago (and hopefully learned from lol). riize was gonna go wrong from the very beginning. first of all removing sungtaro from nct was such a dumb move. they had finally grown an actual fanbase there but the semi-good thing was that some nctzens also became briizes lol. we had lost shohei to his injury but at least we had eunseok and seunghan who we already knew had great synergy w sungtaro plus 3 new guys. center 5 tried to promote them as global group of young men who were hip and relatable in the beginning, relying mostly on their contact w fans online. i have no idea why they published that manhwa, literally no one asked for it neither was it interesting or continued. then when they released siren everybody was confused on why would they remove these guys from nct just to make them do a nct-esque song.

i think that's where the issues started. their concept was too vague. but luckily they were received well both in and out of korea which was their initial goal. all in this mean time there's already leaks happening, but as far as i rmr the reaction in the beginning wasn't so bad, the fandom wasnt that tight yet. so center 5 decides the FANS get to choose the fandom name, so we do: sunz. i rmr thinking it was ugly and that just sun was better but at least it wasn't briize. then out of nowhere the kfans start saying that actually sunz is EXTREMELY offensive because of the political connotations of rising sun (mind you, my first thought was sun+riize. and MIND YOU again, riize performed a song called rising sun not long after) with japan's colonization. so not even days later, center 5 says that they decided to change the fandom name to briize.

that was probably the first time kfans threw a tantrum and got their way, and center 5 showed they have no backbone lol. i shouldve realized at that point it would be a waste of time to be a part of this fandom (and for a LONG time i said i wasnt).

the thing is it happened again and again. whatever the kfans didn't like, center 5 would change (dates, designs, the lightstick). what kind of dumb ass +20 year old company changes stances again and again to please a small group of whiny people? the only explanation was the lack of experience of the new management. all people involved in working with riize rn have no experience at all and they just follow the flow of local fans.

by that point seunghan was already in hiatus because some briizes (both kfans and ifans) were pissed at him and harassed him until he was too emotionally unstable to stand on stage, and that's when the fandom split between people who thought he shouldn't be put in hiatus for what he did and the people who thought he should be removed.

i'm not korean or asian so i'll never in my life be able to understand or relate to believing that idols should be perfect human beings who are not allowed to drink or to go out or to have sex or to date and if they aren't perfect or pure then they shouldn't be an idol. an idol for me is someone pretty or talented who sings and dances and does it well, that's it. as long as they aren't harming someone behind the scenes then i don't care about their personal life. i understand that it's a cultural thing but it will never make sense to me. and i'm sure there must be many asian fans who don't think that way.

when seunghan got in hiatus the first reaction of ot7s was to say that it's okay for him to take time off and that they would wait for him while ot6s were just happy that he wasn't there, that his 'impurity' wasn't staining the other's 'purity' and that riize's 'image' would finally get better. the members didn't say anything about it. seunghan posted an apology and center 5 said they would handle whoever was exposing his personal life and all people who were harassing him.

and yet, not even days after, they started removing him from riize content. removed him from videos, from photoshoots, from merchandise and from songs. that's when ot7s caught up that there was something wrong and that this wasn't a simple hiatus, and that's when the ot7 protests started (where they would either comment "riize is 7" in sns or scream it, although only ifans out of asia had the balls to actually scream). ot6s where simply just annoyed at this and said that it was unnecessary and it would make the other members uncomfortable. this split the fandom even further, and ot6s would blame genuinely every little thing that went wrong with the fandom or with the members on seunghan (and his fans), in a way to ostracize them even further.

riize was probably ordered to not mention him by name, because they didn't do it for 10 months. there were a lot of comments about seunghan in the beginning that they obviously couldnt answer so they just ignored it all until they broke off communication w fans and would only return to semi-normal interactions after most of the ot7s had dropped riize and the seunghan protests were dying down. at the very beginning we only got a live of the 6 of them looking miserable because seunghan was harassed until he was in hiatus and now some ppl were trying to throw eunseok, anton and sohee under the bus (if i remember correctly it was: eunseok bc he had a gf and was drinking, anton bc he had a gf and sohee because he drank and went to clubs and was too affectionate with a friend). all they did was ask for fans to not believe the rumors (bc ppl were extrapolating what they had done) and that they would be okay. it was very obvious they were all distraught and upset even tho they tried to play it off as another normal live.

in the meantime, sm did absolutely nothing. literally nothing. ignored all the calls and e-mails and reports and projects ot7s did just to KNOW if seunghan was okay and when he would come back and that it would be fine for him to do so. they didn't do anything to people who were harassing seunghan, if anything they allowed them to get worse. so now there's a lot of akgaes.

one of the reasons i think sm ignored it all is bc MOST ot7s were still watching, listening, buying and supporting riize as 6. one of the 1st things some ot7s planned was to boycott sm and riize until seunghan came back. i did my part, i never bought anything from riize, i pirated their content and never supported them as 6 🤷‍♂️. there is literally no point in screaming riize is 7 to staff who has no power over it after you already bought the damn ticket to the show. do it in front of the building, do it in any free show riize attends, do it in coferences that center 5 higher ups go to, have the balls to say it to riize personally and let them know you support them as 7 lol. just don't give sm money. the thing is most korean ot7s are fucking cowards and they never did anything for seunghan other than write notes in the billboards people bought for him. and i think that lack of action got korean ot6s too comfortable, because they were the majority in all korean events and knew ot7s would do nothing.

so imagine their shock now 10 months later after all this time of inaction, out of nowhere, riize posts a statement saying seunghan will be back, and seunghan posts ANOTHER apology for what he did. mind you, not even hours before, dispatch posted an article saying he had left riize. ot6s went from celebrating to being absolutely livid. they start boycotting and harassing all of riize.

to make matters worse, wonbin (the most popular, the one who has the most akgaes and has the most fans who are anti-seunghan), like 30 mins before going on stage in madrid, posts on weverse defending their choice to bring seunghan back and APOLOGIZING for making briize mad. so now kbriizes think sm FORCED him to do it, and they bring all their anger back on seunghan, bc they believe sm is using wonbin as a shield and that they'll try use other members as well. this is right around the time they start mass buying funeral wreaths and sending them to the park in front of sm. the phrases on them vary from jokes to actual threats, but all are addressed to seunghan. riize is still in madrid (and right before they went on, there's was a riize is 7 chant) and seunghan is by himself in seoul. someone posts a video of seunghan walking thru the hundreds of funeral wreaths in front of sm alone, and later someone posts pictures that he went to the billboards with support messages. the next morning we get the news he decided to leave riize for good.

the way that they treated him is simply inhumane. and such a lack of professionalism. how dare such a big company go back on their word over and over and not do the basic thing that is protect their artist. they literally let him walk ALONE through HUNDREDS of funeral wreaths with HIS NAME. he's just 21!!!!!!!!!!!! do you know how insane it would be to walk through your own funeral!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! to lose your career and to be ostracized by your own fandom for something so fucking stupid!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! they have been threatening his life since LAST YEAR and watching and judging his every move!!!!!!!!!!! they want him to repent thru their terms and they're mad he's not whipping himself in front of them!!!!!!!!! he couldn't go out to help his friends, he couldn't want to attend umiversity, he couldn't go to restaurants, he couldn't go on shows. they would constantly remind him how he needed to be repenting like he was a criminal!!!!!!!!! i think that's why they did something so radical, they wanted to break his spirit, and they did.

riize wasn't even there to support him thru it. when the statement came out, they were on the plane back to korea. there was no way center 5 thought that bringing seunghan back into riize was a decision they made as a whole, but deciding to remove him again was something that seunghan could decide on his own after having witnessed such a horrific thing with no support system. if anything, all the suddenness of this points to something else. maybe center 5 had already decided they would remove him, but wanted to do one last cruel thing to him and riize, just to be sure that they would keep the insane fans who gives them money, and hope the fans who cared about seunghan will stop caring now.

but you see this thing will blow up in their faces. because kbriizes are simply never satisfied. they'll target one member after the other (they already are doing that). and now whatever little connection riize had with briizes was severed. they saw with their own eyes all those funeral wreathes. they saw their own company go back on a decision they all had made. they saw the fans who they had build a relationship for over a year turn back on them just to remove their friend and co worker, for things they have also done. so they KNOW their neck could be on the line next. they KNOW the fans they have genuinely don't give a single fuck about their words or feelings or passion. and the company just sent them on their next event on japan, so they'll have to face all the fans that did this without even having time to rest and think, because sm booked them from oct 15 to oct 20.

and to be quite honest, i wasn't even ride or die for seunghan like that. my focus on riize was simply bc i enjoyed and biased sungtaro, i liked seunghan and eunseok only bc i was already familiar with them. from the moment they removed seunghan from content, and especially when they removed him from siren, i knew he wasn't coming back. sm literally have never done anything like that. in those 10 months my faith went from low to nonexistent. i had kinda already accepted he wouldn't come back, but i thought it was evil of sm and center 5 to not even say anything regarding his situation. so the anger i feel now isn't even just for seunghan, but in general, seeing idols be mistreated like this. but i have never seen it to this extent.

and for them to bring him back out of nowhere just to remove him 2 days later? this is INSANELY EVIL. i will never be able to look at riize or sm the same way ever again. they knew exactly what the reaction from ot6s would be because THEY LET IT MARINATE FOR 10 MONTHS!!!!!!!!!!!! they didn't prepare a SINGLE thing to protect him or the other members. if anything they were foaming at the mouth in a hurry at the chance to remove him because they knew he was already in a delicate spot. they're literally playing with this guy's mental health!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i was genuinely worried yesterday that he would kill himself!!!!!!!! sm already dealed badly with other idols being mistreated in the past, but to give in to what haters say? this is a new low for them. they should have stood their ground, they should have removed those wreaths and let all the members say that they won't tolerate any of that!!!!!!!

but instead they bowed their heads like the cowards they are. i genuinely feel sorry to everyone that's under sm rn. especially the rookies and the new gg that will debut. what a sorry excuse of a company. they deserve all the bad things that comes their way. this would also be such a perfect chance to address the madness that fandoms can become and how important mental health is to idols, but they threw it in the trash to stay in the same mess this industry has been for years. and now riize will go back to the same way they were, pretending everything is okay but walking on eggshells. i can't even feel that sorry for them cos they should be able to stand up for themselves. i literally can't look them in the face without feeling anger and sadness.

[bonesandthebees]

ive been both really busy and also not? hahah but ive been good!! i've been mostly working. today was crazy actually, someone walked into the vet with a bearded lizard?? that they found ?? at the local park?? someone had just abandoned their lizard there ig which was really sad but im glad someone found it and was able to help it!! also the person who found it was a vet tech themselves who used to have bearded lizards so that's good hahahah they were v prepared

our doctor unfortunately doesn't take any exotics so we had to send them to a diff vet but it was cool to see the lizard, he was very sweet and friendly EUEUUEUE

but yeah other than work? mostly just been writing which has been super nice. this is the first year im properly tackling whumptober!! normally i just. pick and choose my fav prompts LMAOO but this year im actually writing for each prompt every day and i've done all 7 days so far!! im super proud of myself rahshshs

i went to my first social dance a couple weekends ago!! that was super funn

i cannot remember if i told you, but i started doing west coast swing lessons!!! since i took a gap year of school while waiting to apply for the vet tech program, i was like "welp i need some sort of hobby that gets me out of the house" so i didnt stew in bad mental health n stuff and i decided to try dance! i'd seen vids of it on my youtube shorts a lot and it always looked so... freeing. and i thought doing something that involved physical activity would be a good idea too since exercise is good for mental health!!

and woww i love it way more than i was expecting HAHHAHASDKFJJK it's so so fun and it really does feel like flying (when you do it with an experienced lead lol, so not always but the times where it's happened i cherish v much <3) and the people?? are all so nice???? like wow i was a bit nervous when i first started but everyone is so welcoming and understanding and super fun to talk to and it's a very accepting environment of queer ppl and i just RAHSHS ITS SOOO LOVELY BEE OH MY GOSHH

but yeah!! so ive been doing that sinceee march but i had yet to go to an actual dance, i'd only done lessons bc i was really nervous lol but also bc its on the weekends and thats when i go visit my mom so its hard to find time. but i finally decided to go no matter what last time (which yeah. almost canceled bc i ended up having two other meetups that day?? it was busy) and im really glad i went it was super fun.

just hoping i can convince one of my friends to go with me one day lol

oh no I'm so sad that someone abandoned their beardie :((( thank god someone found it though and wanted to make sure it was okay. so many people would just leave it so that little guy got lucky with that at least. I love bearded dragons, one of my teachers in high school had one she named Mushu and she would let him just run around the room during class sometimes. he was adorable.

ooooo I hope you're having fun with whumptober!!! you're stronger than me I've never attempted to do all the prompts for something like that. I struggle so much already with keeping things short and I also don't do great with prompts but I admire everyone who can dedicate themselves to that. it's such good writing practice as well

oh that class sounds lovely. tbh it really shows you have a LOT of self awareness to recognize that not only do you need something to get you out of the house, but taking the steps to sign up for a class with physical activity for your mental health. that's really great and you're going to thank yourself later for putting yourself out there like that. and that sounds so much fun!!! manifesting you get one of your friends to join you one day

(also this reminds me I really need to get back in the habit of going to my yoga and other exercise classes. I fell out of it after I got back from my europe trip this summer so I need to get my ass in gear again)

[yasminewestbank-archive]

some yasmine upbringing lore

he's born in dino valley in a community of yakut horses herders/breeders, which are mainly used for meat. (or a jorvik version of yakut horses idk). in jorvik horse meat is illegal/controversial but it's part of life in dino valley. he was raised around horses and grew up with them and taking care of them and he loves them. but he never saw any other horse breed besides this one. he especially always loved riding his horses, as fast as possible. ofc he had his 1 yakut horse he loved the most and loved riding.

one day he encounters in the forest a pure black russian-arabian horse. he hasn't seen a horse like this before. (not sure yet where the horse came from). he befriends it and is blown away by how athletic and fast it is. and when the horse finally lets him ride it, it's so incredibly fast and it's the best feeling in the world. he completely falls in love with this horse.

but something happens that eventually forces him to kill the horse. at first i thought that maybe theres a hunger and he needs to sacrifice the horse for his family to have food, but if they have many horses it doesnt rlly fit. so idk yet what happens but something that makes him kill the horse that ill think about eventually. its a big deal for him ofc, and he cant stop thinking about this horse. hes way more heartbroken than he wouldve liked to admit. and riding the yakut horses is not the same anymore. eventually he pushed his "childhood friend" yakut horse to the limit to try to match the russian arabian he lost, and it died.

so he makes a contract with a pandorian creature. in dino valley people are kind of aware to pandoria, not very clearly, they dont know the name of it but they just know there are those supernatural things that come from this supernatural world and they try to keep balance with it. they use pandoria energy for light beacons for example, just a little bit, and give back to pandoria and try to keep the harmony.

so yasmine wants to bring back to life the horse he lost. he wants to feel what he felt when riding it. the pandorian creature asks yasmine to eat him. so basically like in howl's moving castle: yasmine swallows the creature, and then his chest hurts and his heart comes out of his chest surrounded by pandoria pink light. he holds it and the heart becomes a horse embryo. so yasmine starts taking care of it. he doesnt have a heart now, his heart is inside the horse.

im not sure if he hides the horse away bc he knows ppl would be suspicious of it and feel the pandoria energy, or if he takes care of it with the rest of the horses.

he also notices it hurts him to be apart from his horse for too long or too far. its unbearable.

when the horse matures he runs into difficulties with it, the snow and ice are a problem to ride fast and he also doesnt know how to train horses for racing so he has to leave dino valley and go to jorvik to learn more about training and all those stuff. then to sustain and support himself he needs to find odd jobs, and starts working for GED. when miss drake finds out about him and the horse, she becomes interested in him.

[secondchoice-ragdoll]

Do you think Trixie ever had feelings for Katya?

hiyaaaaaay now thats definitely a question😭 disclaimer: this is veeeery wishy-washy and fanfiction-y, based on barely anything else but *vibes* and my observations. this is strictly my perspective, and may not at all overlap w anyone's involved. none of this should be treated as actual information (just like anything else i say, pretty much).

so the quick answer is: yes. (but "feelings" is very broad)

in depth: i am 99,9% sure the answer is yes. at some point(/s), to some degree, some kinds of feelings, definitely yes. in the beginning it (whatever it was) seemed to pair with a sort of admiartion, which im sure they still have, but back then K could have been more like a far away, untouchable, sensational concept, now K is closer and she knows her well and loves and trusts her (and she is her god. never forget that😭😭😭). like rn she for sure loves K very very dearly and very very much. do you know abt that kind of love when u r not exactly sure what box to put it into, but all that matters is that its there and its a big feeling. and maybe u would be open to it being sexual/romantic too, but u might as well be fine w nothing of the sort ever happening, u just want to keep each other close. well they seem to fall under this bracket from where i stand.

obvi we know K has vocalised her opinion on the matter back in the days pretty clearly. and i'd argue that she has kept doing so up until very recently. and i'd also argue that so did T. like, the jig has been up for a decade, i think atp its their subconscious speaking sometimes, and they might not even be fully aware of how they r coming off (for example: the way they kept describing each other when asked abt their ideal partners. like, im sure they do not spend their days actively pining for each other. but like. u see it, i see it, we all see it?). im not saying they'd be perfect together w no issues and no rough times, bc thats just not realistic at all, but i know for a fact that they do love each other so very much im not even sure what a person can do w that intensitiy. (do they love each other the most? like, im not joking here, do u remember the times they have both said things like "u r my fav person" or "i definitely love u very much" or T pressing K on who she loves the most until she said her name? like??? if things have happened in the last months then i think ppl might have fallen out of Ts line who had a chance at being higher on the list (for a few possible reasons. such as being a romantic partner and how u r "supposed to" place those ones higher. but i get that. i just also have a lot of feeling abt this, surprisingly) then they *do* do love each other the most, dont they? so its all veeery complicated w them😭

the thing i am not certain abt is if T ever called it what it was, even only to herself. bc. like she doesnt seem to be a very big fan of said possibility of said feelings towards said person regardless of whether or not its true. like yes she will float the idea as a """joke""" of K being her partner at netflick in the middle of watching something totally irrelevant. but as a sentimental deep and actual reality im decently sure she does not like it. at different times of the last decade for different reasons (understandable ones, if i might add. the worst of it is that i can easily justify everything from both ends and thats why its just so UGH bc i get it. but i still think they r silly for doing things the way they do them). i think she knows on a level of being aware of what time it is, but the most in-character thing in my head would be for her to just go "no💗 like okay i see u i hear u i cant do anything but accept the fact that there is smth but just no. we got to stop, we cant be doing this. so i will not be acknowledging anything of the sort. bye". like ik it sounds stupid spelled out like this, but what i mean is that i feel like she worked on putting these things neatly away (before they even really had a chance to form into a graspable thought), and despite the box being made of glass and a little seetrought here and there, she seems to be content abt it being as it is.

and for how things are since her break? not a single fucking clue. i couldnt even tell u if i got paid to do so. i have a few ideas, all of them being based on even more nothing of a nothing than any of my other ideas. but i am seated for whenever we will be hearing abt how things went, or just seeing how things r when she is back. hope she is doing amazing wherever she is!!