#like are you kidding? some channels i watch barely put stuff out every three months

[navree]

anyway the whole watcher Outrage™ about a company making a business decision is motivated by the exact same sentiment as people who want good journalism but also get pissed when news articles are put behind a paywall or the people who want more public transport but get pissed about bus fares or train tickets costing money

[srirachvbi]

Kageyama and Bokuto taking their kids to practice headcanons !

request: hihi i was wondering if you can do a continuation of the bringing their kids to practice with some of the other haikyuu characters? i’d love to see it with kageyama especially but honestly you can pick anyone! thank you :)

a/n: i AM SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG... I have no excuses, i was too sad about haikyuu e wording but i have read threads on how to write characters on twitter and i am thriving... so n e ways i was looking for a reason to write more of these because i just... love the idea of this so tsym for requesting!! if i write more parts, i might do hoshiumi, hinata, atsumu, and... maybe oikawa? i’m a huge bokuto stan so his might be longer than kageyamas im sorry <3 and and ik that kageyama goes to italy but for the sake of i want to write other characters, i will be using the adlers oops. i will also be only doing probably two characters per post for these because i write so much for it. LMAO ALSO these are super unrealistic this would NOT be allowed during pro sports practices but for the sake of entertainment, let’s just... do it warnings: manga spoilers

Bokuto Koutarou

He had been wanting to bring Kaori to practice for a while but each time he tried to, you would be like no bitch </3 

heart been broke so many times

When you told him that you had to go into work and couldn’t schedule the nanny in time, he was like “I’LL TAKE CARE OF HER!!!”

Honestly you were only against him taking her because you were still mad at him for leaving her in the high chair for a while and you came home to her crying and him just knocked out 

Like... Kou, pls <3 

He had brought Kaori into post game interviews before but you were always there so this would really be the first time he’d take care of her by himself for a period of time longer than an hour

He’s a good parent dw !! he had just spent the whole night thinking about the most random shit and he ended up sleeping like three hours 

He was thinking about horses cause Ushijima brought them up in an interview >:0

You were still mad tho 

It had been a while and he had actually shown to you that he could take care of her by himself so you were fine with him taking her to practice

He was super pumped and was practically shaking in excitement (he was texting Akaashi the whole morning asdlfjskdf)

Bokuto-san AGHASHEE!!!!! Y/N IS LETTING ME TAKE KAORI  TO PRACTICE!!!!!!!!! AGHASHEE Congrats, Bokuto-san. 

That conversation but every two minutes

I’m sorry Akaashi <3 

He also texts the whole group chat and Hinata’s equally as excited

Kaori and Hinata were best friends !!!! She literally loved him

Like he would put her on his shoulders and they’d run around for hours

How he has so much energy goes beyond everyone but it’s fun to watch 

You lectured him for half an hour about what he should do in certain situations and unlike most times, he listened really well because :(( the baby cares about Kaori

Both Kaori and him actually walked with you to the train station and saw you off before heading to practice !! 

He normally drives to practice because he has a super nice car and it’s easier to drive with Kaori instead of public transportation

When they get to the gym, he goes running in with Kaori on his shoulders 

“WE HAVE ARRIVEEEED!!!!!!!!” 

cue Hinata cheering super loudly

Kaori’s giggling and being all cute omg i love her

She was being carried in on her dad’s shoulders so Bo lets her down and she immediately runs (read: waddles quickly) to Hinata

“Hinata-nii!!!!”

Hinata starts crying-- jk, no

He goes “Kaori-chan!” and scoops her up in his beefy arms 

BEEFY HINATA BEEFY HINATA BEEFY HINATA

Sorry

She’s giggling and she like kisses his cheek and everyone’s like “so cute...” ohmyogd babies

Similar to her dad, she’s super friendly!! and a bit simple minded

It’s literally in her blood to not actually hate anyone so she gets along with EVERYONE at practice

She even makes the coach super soft omg

Atsumu’s just watching her and being like “child. want. child-- oh god, i need a kid.” cause she’s just so god damn cute

Lol atsumu having twins cause it’s a gene or smth idk biology

I barely passed bio please spare me <3

I actually got an 80 smth on my final last year don’t listen to me

Sakusa being hesitant at first to be near her but she’s actually super sweet to him!!

CAUSE LIKE HER DAD SHE’S ACTUALLY REALLY EMOTIONALLY INTELLIGENT AND CAN READ PEOPLE REALLY WELL

like she saw Sakusa’s face and was like “oh!! I remember what dad said!!” 

Kou talks about his teammates a lot and somehow Kaori remembered him telling her about how Sakusa’s a germaphobe so she’s like

“Sir!! I washed my hands!! I’m not dirty!!” and he

He just 👁👄👁 

He thinks she’s cute and treasures her now

Suddenly Kaori has a whole team of dads

it’s okay

Bokuto itching to let her play volleyball but at the same time worrying about her if she does

It’s like the angel and the devil on his shoulders

One sides like

let her pLAY!!!!! LET HER PLAY (read it as if it’s the LEt ME INNN meme)

While the other sides like

👁👄👁 (y/n) will kill me if she gets hurt and i’ll kill myself if she gets hurt and hinata will kill me if she gets hurt-

In the end he gives her a volleyball after she asks once and he’s like ‘PFFT KAORI-CHAN IF YOU INSIST’ while she’s like

dude i asked to play once and normally someone disagrees with me tf are you on, sir? 

she tries to pick the ball up but it ends up being half her size and it’s just... such a cute image

Bo takes a picture of it and sends it to you!!

You reply back in seconds lol

Kou-kun ❤💖 [image.jpeg] LOOK AT HER!! FUTURE PRO (Y/N)-CHAN!! (Y/N) MY LOVE ❤💕❤💕💕❤💕❤💕 be careful letting her hold that it’s too big!! but so cute!!! have fun taro <3

He ends up taking the ball away after a bit because she can’t walk while holding it

Eventually practice has to start tho so he asks her to sit on the bench and she’s an obedient angel and does so !!

The whole time she’s like swinging her legs and watching her dad practice

It’s fun for her to see him play 

Okay but like I’ve said, she’s similar to her dad

At one point at practice during a break, she stole Atsumu’s water and was running around the gym with him chasing her

He was ofc not actually chasing her cause he found it cute that she was trying to steal his stuff

Lol Sakusa being like “oh, you can’t catch up to a child? are your knees getting bad, old man?”

Atsumu’s like “bro, we’re the same age”

Sakusa ignores him

She ends up TRIPPInG AND ATSUMU’s LIke “Oh fuck” 

SHE CRIES

omg Bokuto’s like “tsum tsum-- do you want to die 👁👄👁🗡” because she just got hurt because of him

Atsumu picks her up and is apologizing so god damn much

This is the first time anyone’s seen Bokuto remotely irritated

Kaori: WAAAHHHH

Atsumu: please, child... i don’t want to die today... please... shhhhhhh

He lets her down and she walks (read: waddles) over to her dad and is giving him puppy eyes omg

Bokuto stops being mad and scoops her up and he’s like “did Kao-chan get a boo boo” and she nods, sniffling

Ohmygod dad bokuto dad bokuto dad bokuto stop

suddenly I actually want kids

no

Shion ends up getting a first aid kit since Meian asked (woah more black jackals players except I don’t really know how to write for them??? woahhh)

Shion roasts Atsumu with Sakusa for letting her fall and suddenly Atsumu’s the bad guy

lol

By the end of practice tho Kaori’s fine !!!

She’s back to her regular happy self so cute :(

She asks Bo to call you and when you pick up she shows you her bandaid on her knee and is like “Miya-san was chasing me and I fell!!”

Suddenly Atsumu feels a cold chill and knows you found out lol

Hi this is (y/n), and you’re watching disney channel-

good luck, atsumu *stops camera*

Kageyama Tobio

He

sigh

He would be equally as confused as a father as Ushijima

It’s okay, he’s trying his best

You normally work from home so you guys haven’t really hired a nanny! 

And if you needed someone to watch your guys’ son, Sho (which can mean to fly oho see what I did there I’m so smart), you just drop him off at your parents’ house or Miwa’s!

WAIT SHO... SHOYO... WAIT I DIDN’T EVEN DO THIS ON PURPOSE IM LITERALLY

However, today was the only time you had to go in for like the next few months and both your parents and Miwa are busy

So, you enlist in your husbands help

“Tobio... I need you to watch Sho...” 

He spits out his milk “wHAT” cause like,, he’s hardly taken care of Sho by himself and normally had either his sister or you around

He doesn’t actually spit out his milk-- you’d kill him if he did because it would be a pain in the ass to clean up <3

It takes a bit of convincing being he’s really nervous about taking care of Sho!!

Okay but he’s a great dad dw it’s just he’s nervous about having another human being literally rely on him completely

You also just remind him that Romero’s a father so he won’t be completely on his own while taking care of Sho

So he somehow gets to the gym with Sho in one piece but he’s literally so stiff like bro, i need you to relax

Hoshiumi yelling “KAGEYAMA SHO!!!!!!!” and Sho (who has actually met the team like two times) goes like “HOFIUMI-SAN!!!!!” 

Sho’s a bit of an energetic bby-- he’s less emotionally constipated than his dad <3

He’s... he reminded you guys of Shoyo and well, you thought it would be nice to name him after his god father

No this isn’t a kagehina post i swear i love them but this is me saying that i love their friendship sm omg stop im gonna cry 402 really just popped into my head again

Hoshiumi getting mad when he sees that Sho has actually grown even though he’s a grown ass man and the little toddler would not, in fact, be catching up that soon

“KAGEYAMA SHO HAVE YOU GROWN >:0000!!!!!” 

Sir, pls... sit down

The Adlers all love Sho since they’ve come into contact with him like twice at games before 

Ushijima just... doesn’t know how to interact with Sho

He just stares down at him and honestly Sho stares back up without fear

Kageyama Sho: no (0) fears 

I think it’s cause his father gives a similar stare sometimes and he just... got used to it

Ushijima gives him that stare and Sho just goes SIGH this again

Jk he’s a baby

He literally looks up at Ushiwaka and gives him this cute ass grin and Ushijima’s like “oh, children are very cute.”

Thank you, Wakatoshi-kun

Romero does, in fact, give Kags some tips about fathering and ends up showing pictures of Rubens to the team (love that) 

OKAY BUT LIKE OFF TOPIC FROM THE PRACTICE BUT

Sho being such a big fan of Hinata and being like “woAHHH!!! I’M NAMED AFTER HIM!!!” 

Hinata rubs it in Kags face because Sho practically idolizes him

anyways

Practice starts and Sho’s just sitting on the gym floor with a volleyball in his hands cause he

Kags just giving newborn Sho a volleyball and expecting him to become acquainted

It worked

Sho’s used to holding onto volleyballs and even tries to hit it but everytime he did, he’d fall backwards onto his lil bum and would be like :(

Kageyama watching from the other side of the gym and his heart just goes AHHHHHHHHHH

He’s about to cry that is the cutest thing he’s ever seen

Sho making sure he doesn’t interrupt practice!!! and like chasing after the ball to make sure it doesn’t go onto the courts!!!

Cute babs is so good :(

He ends up tripping tho and starts to tear up and Kags is watching during practice and goes “OH GOD”

He’s literally whipping his head from Sho to his coach and has this desperate look on his face 

he’s saying “JUST ONE BREAK!! JUST ONE, SIR!!” with his eyes and his coach just gives in

Kageyama going from one side of the gym to the next at insane speed

Sho: dad :((( i hwurt my knee :(((

Kags just picks him up and cradles him to his chest (he does this after making sure there’s no blood or anything-- it’s literally just a little bit red) 

Kags being a good dad just... WEAK

Only like two minutes later, Sho stops sniffling and is like “!!! go back to practice daddy!!” 

Kags does and he can’t focus on Sho anymore cause his coach would yell at him asldfjlsf

At the end of practice, Sho is like “dad i wanna play voweyball!!!!!!” and Kags heart just CLENCHES

He grabs his heart like that meme or smth 

You call them cause you know when practice normally ends and Sho’s just talking a lot and it’s so cute

He’s super excited and you’re like !!! My CUTE CHILD !!!!

Lol you tease Kags cause he was worrying about nothing

“Maybe I’ll let you take care of him by yourself more often Tobio” “Pls, I lost ten years of my life when I saw him fall pls not yet <3″ 

[killian-whump]

Game Night! [Liveblog #4]

I’m gonna try to finish up the last game and the end of the video in this post, so we better get right to it!

The last game they’re going to play is called Quiplash. Okay, they’re going to be given a prompt... and whoever finishes the quip in the funniest way wins. Kat warns that she’s a master at this and that everybody’s going down. Colin seems impressed by her bravado, but incensed to win nonetheless. “Here we go,” says Sam unenthusiastically 😂

AND THE GAME IS ON!!!

...or it’s meant to be on. Sam’s not joined the game yet. Seems to be having some sort of technical difficulty. “You scared of losing, Sam?” Colin asks helpfully. “All the rest of us got in pretty easy...”

Sam has joined. His name is now Colonislosin 😂 It’s hard to see exactly how it’s spelled. I don’t think any of them can see it that clearly, either. Sam has to tell them what it says.

“We’ll see,” Colin says. “We’ll see.”

The game begins. “It’s more like Col-on is losin,” Sam says. “Col-on.”

The audio is breaking all up in this segment, and Josh even comments on “Low internet signal. We’re doing great.” Hmm. I paid $10 for this, you damn well better find a stronger internet signal.

ROUND 1! The first quip is: We can all agree that... The two answers are: “Covid sucks” and “Josh... is... hairy” “Covid sucks” wins ~ and Colin gets all the points.

The second quip is: A terrible name for a funeral parlor. The two answers are: “Happy Times Palace” and “We put the Fun in Funeral” “We put the Fun in Funeral” wins ~ and Kat gets all the points.

The third quip is: “Knock Knock” “Who’s There?” The two answers are: “Me DUH” and “Get the fuck away from my door” “Get the fuck away” wins and Josh gets most of the points. Colin gets some too, I think, for his answer, because Sam voted for it.

The fourth quip is: “Something that would make a creepy replacement for the horses on a merry-go-round.” The two answers are: “Mini Josh’s” and “Creepy Princes” AREN’T THOSE THE SAME THING?! 😂 “One and the same,” says Sammy. “You don’t want to sit on a mini Josh, do you?” Sam ponders. Josh forgets to even vote, and Sam gets points for “Mini Josh’s”

At the end of Round 1, Sam is in the lead, with Kat and Colin tied for second.

I wanna take this moment to apologize for how BORING this post is so far. During the games, all five people (the three stars, Josh, and Sammy the producer) are in these miniscule windows on the far right of the screen. You can barely even see them. And during this game, there’s little to no conversation going on between/during the quips. As much fun as this game might be to play, it’s not a lot of fun to watch. The last one was better, but even that tended to DRAG for the audience at home. Josh really needs to work on the games he’s having stars play if he plans to keep charging $10 a month to watch this stuff. Also, the audio keeps breaking up in this segment, so even when they talk, some of it’s hard to decipher.

“I respect that Colin is doing this instead of reading bedtime stories to his children tonight,” Josh says as everyone’s entering in their answers for Round 2. “[That’s] how committed I am,” Colin replies. Kat says something that is so broken up, I can’t even begin to figure out what it is. Something about bedtime stories and Colin’s kids. It’s probably funny. 🤷‍♀️ I’m getting mad about my $10 gift card being gone again.

Alright. Round 2.

Quip #1: It never ends well when you mix ___ and ___. Answers: “poo and oatmeal” and “Sam and Josh” Okay, that second one is gold. Who did that? Apparently Colin did “poo and oatmeal” and Kat did “Sam and Josh”. Bless her. Colin gets the points with more votes, though.

Quip #2: The worst car feature that ends with “holder” Answers: “penis” and “diaper” Sam is just blinking rapidly. Now he’s laughing. “How does that work?” he asks. No one answers. “But I wanna know,” he says. “How does it work?” Josh wins the points with his “penis” answer - which Colin voted for, by the way - but no one cares now. “Does it move?” Kat asks. “Or does it just-” “Don’t ask too many questions,” Josh says. “What kind of size is it?” Sam asks. “Is it stationary or is there a motor feature?” Kat asks. “Maybe it’s a good idea...” Sam concludes, as Josh laments the kind of dreams he’s going to have now.

The third quip is literally happening in the background now, as everyone talks about the penis holder. Colin is noticeably silent on the topic XD

Quip #3: Something upsetting you could say to the cable guy as he installs your television service. Answers: “you smell like fart” and “want to see my murder room?” I’m sitting here going, “don’t be Colin, don’t be Colin” while simultaneously knowing 100% that Colin absolutely typed “you smell like fart” into his phone and... Yeah. Yeah, I’m right. That was him 😂 And he got 0 points. “Oh, boooo,” says Colin. Honey... Honey, I’m sorry, but that was bad.

Quip #4: The name of the reindeer Santa did not pick to pull his sleigh. Answers: “ohdeer” and “tipsy” Neither of these are very good. I hate this game. Kat gets the points with “tipsy”.

OH WOW, YOU GUYS. The final points are tallied and...

WHAT IS THIS TOMFOOLERY?! Colin is LOSING?!?! I mean, I know “you smell like fart” was bad, but this is unbelievable! I call shenanigans!!!

Colin is literally sitting forward in his chair now, lmao. The determination is intense, you guys. I once again cannot handle him right now. I wish he wasn’t in the teeny tiny window so I could show you guys better, but look at him getting his fucking game face on:

This man is a peanut and I love him with every fiber of my being. Look at him being a competitive little somesuch in last place. I can’t, you guys. Bury me here, etc, etc, I’m just a goner for this ridiculous man.

O’DONOINTENSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Last Round: Quip: Strange side effect to hear during a drug commercial. Answers: “cream cheese will come out of your butt” “seeing double horowitz” and “the screams of baboons” - there’s only three because Kat didn’t get her answer in before the time was up. Aaaaaaand the sound’s breaking all up again 😣 Josh is wondering what the point is of voting, if all you’re doing is giving points to your competitors. “Do you have to give all three votes?” Colin asks. “See,” Josh says. “Colin is thinking strategically, like me.” “Well, I’m not entirely sure the other two, I think, deserve any more than one point.” But it’s... it’s the WAY he says it, OH MY GOD, lol. Lemme... I gotta... Okay, I screen recorded it for you guys.

That O’Donosass is actually almost worth $10, you guys.

Which is good, because the audio is getting worse and worse on this and it’s starting to piss me off. Anyway! Everybody’s got a lot of points, because those were ALL good answers (Colin’s was “the screams of baboons” which I quite like). Let’s see the final tally...

Josh is the winner! But Colin managed a come-from-behind close second, so I’m really proud of him :D Sam mentions how Josh invited them all there to play games and then BEAT them. Josh is closing out the show, saying he hopes everyone enjoyed it... “I enjoyed it,” Josh says "But maybe that’s just 'cause I won at the very last second.” “No, well, you won ONE,” Colin cuts in. “You won ONE game.”

SERIOUSLY. BURY ME RIGHT THERE 😂😂😂

“Colin won the first round,” Josh says.

“...and then we have these two other people.”

Incidentally, I wish everyone’s webcams were as clear as Kat’s.

Anyway, now there’s some sweet summing up... and Josh hawking everyone’s current projects... (gee, it’s like this is promotional content or something) and the show closing down and-

“Can I win next time?” asks Sam Heughan.

~ The End ~

I hope you guys had fun reading this. I gotta say...  this one video isn’t worth $10. I can see if you’re a huge fan of Josh’s or really into celebrity culture, $10 a month might be a fine price to pay for a bunch of this kind of content... but for a one-time video when your fave happens to show up on his channel? Nah. He really should have a “one time access” fee available for individual videos that’s a LOT less. Like, I’m talking, like... $1 or 2. This is literally a zoom call... and as such, the quality’s only as good as his guests’ webcams and audio and everyone’s internet connections. Also, I found the game format enticing... but ultimately boring due to the games chosen. The Would You Rather was the most fun of the three, because we actually got to hear from the stars and get some banter going. The games relied too much on the stars interacting with their devices instead of each other or anyone really engaging the audience. Honestly, if it was any of my faves other than Colin in this video, I might not have even watched the whole thing. Colin’s adorable competitive streak and eagerness to win play games is what kept me watching. The idea is cute, but it needs some work. And the price is too high - especially with the audio issues in the last ten minutes or so. That’s my final verdict.

[madamewriterofwrongs]

May and the Rainbow Kingdom

911/Buck & May

Written for @cirrius-akiyo who wanted a Buck & May friendship.

The station was unusually quiet when she walked through the front door. The trucks were still in their place, being polished and restocked by other crew members – most of whom paid her no mind or recognized her as the ‘captain’s kid’. She’d only been called that once, but she remembered the uneasy feeling and the sneer of the probationary officer’s voice. A well-practiced eyebrow raised, and her best customer service smile, ensured he never bothered her again.

Today she wasn’t here as the ‘captain’s kid’, she was here as a friend in need of help from another – older and wiser – friend. A glance at the ambulance missing from its usual station dampened her expectations slightly.

“Hey, May.” She looked up to see a familiar face waving at her from the loft and she jogged to meet him.

“Hey, Buck. I was hoping to talk to Hen, is she around?”

The blond-haired firefighter returned to his task of tidying the upper floor (the table smelt comfortingly of bleach and lemon so he was nearly done) while she knelt on the couch to watch him work.

“Sorry; she just left on a call with Chim and Bobby. Is there anything I can help you with?”

She tried to keep the dejected sigh from her voice. “How versed are you on Bioethics of Non-Existence?”

It was almost comical, the way Buck paused in his sweeping to take in her question. “I definitely recognize some of those words.”

As she suspected; May turned to collapse onto the couch with a groan. “I really needed to talk to Hen.” Not that she didn’t trust the other adults in her life – Maddie had tried to help, but she’d been out of Medicine for too long – Hen was her last hope.

“School going that well, huh?” She didn’t have to look to hear the amusement in the man’s voice.

“It’s actually pretty good.” She admitted, still slumped half-off the couch. “I just have mt midterm on Friday and I really need someone who can test me on this stuff.”

“I’m sure you’ve got a handle on it. You were always a smart kid.”

May did smile at that. It was easier to accept being called a child from someone who actually knew her as a child. Granted, she and Buck weren’t overly close, but he was always nice to her, and Bobby seemed fond of him.

“I’ve studied this stuff over and over but I just don’t feel ready” she admitted to the ceiling. Maybe Buck should clean those rafters (he was certainly tall enough). Better yet, maybe she could do it. “I either need a distraction or another month of review.”

Maybe if she hid out at the station, she could lie to her professor and say she had a medical emergency. Or maybe, she could convince him to let her take her exam tomorrow and put her out of her misery. She hated the waiting game. The more she reviewed the material, the less secure she felt in her knowledge. It just needed to be over and done with so she could start stressing about the next thing. Her English essay was due next week. It could use a third rewrite.

“I don’t know about the review.” Visions of Buck peering over top of her, pulled May out of her spiral. “But if you’re in need of a distraction, I could use a co-babysitter tonight. I’m watching Christopher while Eddie’s out on a date and I’m sure he’d love to hang out with you.”

An evening spent with her stepdad’s friend, and her stepdad’s other friend’s son was not exactly what she had in mind for a Monday night, but it was better than nothing. Besides, she liked Christopher well enough; he was a cute kid with a sensible head on his shoulders. And Buck was nice – if a little bit accident-prone for the amount of times she’d visited him in the hospital – plus it was an excuse to get out of her routine for a few hours. Maybe she could come early and ask Eddie some questions (an army medic had to have some thoughts on ethics in medicine, right?).

“Sure,” she smiled up at him. “why not?”

Which was how May found herself squished between a surprisingly calm 10-year-old, and an overly-energetic 29-year-old, splitting the difference as she scrolled through their Netflix Kids’ queue.

Christopher had insisted that they didn’t need to use the kid’s channel as he was absolutely old enough to handle all the scary movies. She remembered Harry, not too long ago, with the same attitude (along with the same nightmare he’d had for weeks about a clown in a sewer). While Buck didn’t have the same experience, he was with her decision to stick to the lighter stuff for tonight. Perhaps he was being overly cautious as he always was with the boy.

Everyone in their circle knew about how Buck had saved Christopher during the tsunami and how close the three of them had become afterwards. It was no wonder he wanted to do everything in his power to protect him – even from the CGI monsters.

As they continued to scroll, she paused on their ‘Continue Watching’ bar, to see if there was anything they wanted pick up. She wasn’t about to watch whatever they chose for their post-dinner treat; she had her textbook and laptop in her bag all charged up.

Just as she was about to continue the search for the perfect movie, her eye caught one of the titles with a half-full red bar and shot a confused glance to Buck. The man kept his eyes purposefully trained on the screen, eyes darting to hers once, as a sign that he knew what she was looking at. Still, he showed no sign of explaining himself so she moved on. For now.

They ended up settling on one of the dinosaur documentary movies, but May kept her promise to herself and reviewed through the entire 90-minute event. It was easy enough to tune out, the graphics were fine, the story was predictable, but at least the boys on either side seemed to be enjoying themselves. Every once in a while, Buck would elbow her to pull her attention back to the screen but it never held her interest for more than a few minutes. Then Christopher would do the same, asking her questions or feeding her facts about the various dinosaurs. That did help for a little while, but even that kid’s endless enthusiasm couldn’t keep back the voice in her head that told her she should be studying.

As far distractions went, this night seemed to be a bust.

When she heard the water run in the bathroom, signally the beginning of Christopher’s bedtime routine, May found herself reaching for the remote once again; if only to keep her hands occupied while she waited to say goodbye to Buck. The least she could do was thank him for his attempt to distract her – even if it had failed.

That was when she found the ‘Continue Watching’ bar once again, and her curiosity got the better of her.

“What’s True and the Rainbow Kingdom?” she asked once her companion had returned. “’Cause it doesn’t seem like something Christopher would be into.”

Buck huffed as he flopped on the couch next to her. “Okay,” he began his confession by raising his hands in surrender. “I watched an episode to see if it was something that’d be appropriate for Nia, but I kind of started watching it on my own.”

“Really?”

“Yes, really” he matched her mocking tone. “Not all the time. But I’ll admit, when I’m having a bad day, it’s nice to turn my brain off with some mindless fun.”

She wasn’t laughing at him – maybe she was, but she wouldn’t tell him that – it was that the image of this grown man, sitting at home, watching what was clearly a Sophia the First carbon copy (if the design was to be believed), was very amusing to her.

“Wow, I see how it is.” Buck lightly pushed May as she shuffled over to create more space. “I try and help and instead you mock me. Very nice.”

Even as a joke, she saw his point and the laughter turned into a smile, which morphed into an eyeroll.

“You’ve got to admit, this doesn’t exactly fit your image.”

“I have no image” he protested. “I’m allowed to like whatever I like.”

“So, you wouldn’t mind if I text my mom that” she had barely begun picking up her phone from the coffee table, when he reached the device first.

“Don’t you dare.” More laughter did make her heart feel a little lighter.

He only handed her phone back once she’d half-heartedly agreed not to text her mom this fresh blackmail material. “I bet you’d like it. It’s about a girl and a cat, and she gets these wishes from a tree, and she uses them to help others.”

“The cat gets wishes?”

“Just” Buck rolled his eyes, grabbing the remote from the cushion between them. “we’re going to watch it right now.”

Without waiting for her response, Buck tapped the first episode and shushed her failed attempt to protest.

The first scene introduced a reasonably catchy theme song with bright colours, along with the main character True and her talking black cat named Bartleby. There was something about a party and a bitchy princess and a weird walking pill they called…something Banjo? Admittedly, when the cat said something sarcastic towards the girls, she cracked a smile, but her mind was still reviewing the differences between Potter’s and Callahan’s philosophies.

The next time she tuned back into the episode, they were sitting on mushroom stools under a tree, attempting to solve a problem as a group. When they took a deep breath, May found herself exhaling with them, and her forehead ached from holding tension for so long. Admittedly, it felt nice to relax her shoulders.

Okay, so this was clearly a kids’ show and nothing else. Mining wishes from a tree and using a book to decipher what all the wishes could do, as though they were Pokémon characters.  It was ridiculous, why was she still watching this? She needed to get home to study.  

“Sure, they get to use the ‘wishopedia’ but my professor won’t let me use Wikipedia as a starting source?” she grumbled under her breath.

“What was that?” She startled when Buck smirked at her.

May tucked back into the arm of the couch with a half-hearted glare. “Nothing.”

She really should be reviewing. The more time she wasted outside of the classroom, the worse her chances of success. She shouldn’t be wasting her time watching this kids’ monstrosity. This really was a stupid show. Why would True forgive Grizelda after she was such a bitch to Bingo-Bango? She was always so positive and patient. And she only used her special powers to help people. That was pretty nice.

That theme song was pretty catchy.

Before she knew it, she was four episodes in, watching two mushroom people win a motor race after everyone got detoured by falling crystals and Grizelda being a bitch (again).

“She should just toss the Cu-Bigly over the cliff and then throw Grizelda.” At Buck’s look of amused indignation, she shrugged. “What? She deserves it for sabotaging the race. It’s not like she’d die from that height.”

A quick glance at her phone told her it was after ten and she had a class in the morning. What astonished her most, was that she hadn’t thought about her course work in an hour. For the first time since starting university, she’d let herself escape her thoughts just for a little while; and honestly, she felt lighter for it.

Still unbelievably guilty for not spending every waking moment of her life preparing for her next test or assignment – but just a little bit lighter.

“Hey, Buck?” She turned to the man barely hiding the fact that he’d begun to doze off. May smirked when he awoke with a snort. “Thanks for your help, I really needed this.”

For a moment, she saw the ‘puppy dog’ that her mom liked to call him: the puffed chest and kind smile and excited eyes. She saw what won over her, somewhat cynical, mother; it made her smile brighter.

“Glad I could help.”

Buck was scrolling mindlessly through his phone two weeks later, when it buzzed with a new text notification, and his mood instantly improved.

87%

Also I may have finished the first season of TatRK

I totally ship True and Zee

Do you want me to wait for you to catch up?

“Hey, May passed her Bioethics Mid-Term” he announced to his friends sitting in the loft; the rest, he would keep as his own reward for a job well done.

Bobby looked up from his usual place in the kitchen, buttering a pan for some dish most of them wouldn’t get to eat. “Since when did May start telling you about her exam results?”

There was no honest answer that wouldn’t make him feel embarrassed, but Buck blushed regardless. “I, uh, helped her study.”

Eddie slapped his shoulder jovially as he passed on his way to grab a bottle of water. “Is there something you want to tell us? You have a secret Bioethics degree?”

Buck brushed him off with a smile. “No, but you do what you can to help out family, right?”

His eyes met with his Captain’s and there was a fondness he only saw with May and Harry. Something he hadn’t seen for himself in a long while.

“Yeah, kid, you do.”

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #348

“nothing will be free  /  nothing will be done  /  black out the sun”

Do you have any famous relatives? My third or so cousin is the author of Not Without My Daughter, but she's not like a smash hit or anything that most people know. I really do recommend the book, though. It's a long read, but a beautiful, true story. Do you care about celebrity gossip? Nah. Have you ever failed a science course in high school? No; I was very good at science. What’s your favorite breakfast food? Cinnamon rolls. Does your house have a basement? No. No house I've ever lived in has had one. Do you like Hot Topic? Well duh. Do you think imagination is valuable? VERY! Just imagine how many incredible things wouldn't exist without it. What was your reaction to your first time falling in love? Unspeakably happy, and I felt like I was building a future with someone. I felt like I had purpose, which I should mention to anyone reading is a mindset to NEVER adopt. No one gives you purpose; you're born with it. How much weight can you lift at once? Ha, not a lot. When you have your own house someday, what color Christmas tree do you want and how will you decorate it? I want a black one with faux snow on the branches, then maybe red ornaments. Kinda look like blood dripping off. Sounds metal. Name three YouTube channels you’ve been loving lately. Lately, John Wolfe, The Dark Den, and Aim To Head Mix. Have you ever bought a designer purse? No. Do you wear jewelry often? No. What color was your senior prom dress? Black. Are you colorblind? No. Name the people you know who are colorblind. Jason's older brother is colorblind to two colors, but idr which. Would you ever consider a career in writing? I'd love to. What was your first favorite color? Red. What do you think about horror movies? I love them. If you love them, what’s your favorite? I really enjoy The Crazies and both The Blair Witch Project movies. Oh, and of course Silent Hill. Got any cool Christmas presents picked out for family or friends yet? I don't have the money to get anyone presents... and while I sometimes get ideas about something I could make someone, then it wouldn't be fair to the rest of my family if I don't make them something, too. What’s your favorite word and why? I really like the sound of "serendipity," as well as its meaning. It's just a pretty, nice word. Do you like to do craft projects? If so, what’s the coolest thing you made? Not really... I think the coolest thing I made was when I put the clay heart I made in Art into a shadowbox, and a poem I wrote was in the background. It was a gift for Jason. I remember working really hard on the whole process and being really happy with it. I don't want to know what he's done with it since. What’s one occupation you think gets paid too much and doesn’t deserve to? I don't know. What’s something you are currently saving money for to buy? Everyone knows about Venus' terrarium by now... Do you smoke/vape? If so, what brand do you smoke/what device do you use? No. Ever done drugs? No. Tell me one of your worst habits. Catastrophizing. I take a tiny seed of something potentially bad, and in seconds it's a damn redwood tree. And I do mean "in seconds." What’s a weird quirk you have that no one else you know does? I don't know, I don't have any particularly unique ones, I think. If you game, what type of headset do you use? I just use earbuds. Do you think you would be a good therapist? You know, it's funny, I've actually pictured myself as one a few times, given my level of understanding and empathy for people, as well as how deeply I want to see others succeed and spread the word that recovery from things like depression is very possible. I've never truly entertained the thought, though, given I'm quite sure I legally couldn't be given my suicidal past and mental illnesses. There is also NO way I could listen to so many people's suffering and manage to stay healthy myself, so, no therapist position for me, thanks. Have you ever been to a Chinatown? No. Do you prefer chunky or creamy peanut butter? Creamy, 100%. Do you stop to pick up heads-up pennies? No. Do your pets have collars? Describe them: Roman has an adorable navy one with a bowtie. Do you have any friends that speak any languages you don’t understand? Old friends, sure. What is something you want to begin learning? I want to improve my ability to perform what in therapy is called "opposite action," where you do the opposite of what your depression (or other conditions) make you want to do. It always helps me feel good, like when I draw even when I don't initially feel like it, but it's rough to really force yourself to do it. What is a food you find comforting when you are sad? Ice cream is my comfort food. What is a quote you find comfort in? There are really a lot, but none come to mind immediately, gah. What is one Tumblr blog you really appreciate? I actually haven't been on my main Tumblr in months, but oh my god there is a Markiplier blog called "lady-raziel" and she is FUCKING HYSTERICAL. The meme quality is A+. What is a comfort movie/show for you? When I actually liked watching movies, I enjoyed watching Silent Hill when I was down. That whole franchise just makes me so happy. What is a recent creative project that you are proud of? That I'm PROUD of, idk. I'm not that happy with the last drawing I made, and I haven't done any serious writing lately that I find noteworthy. What is a video game that you find comforting? Shadow of the Colossus is probably #1. I find it so relaxing while equally epic as fuck. The soundtrack is to die for, and after playing it a billion times, it's pretty easy for me to kinda breeze through and just enjoy myself. Do you know how to bake bread? If so, what is something you’ve baked recently? No. Would you rather live in the mountains, city, beach, or the forest? THE MOUNTAINS!!! Particularly in the woods IN the mountains! Are you closer to your mother’s or father’s side of the family? Mom's. I don't even remember anyone from Dad's. Have you ever been in a “perfect relationship”? I thought so. Have you ever lost a fingernail or toenail? No. Were you a Disney or Nickelodeon kid? I preferred Disney. Have you ever been inside a jail/prison? No, and I don't plan on it. Have you ever dated a guy with a beard, mustache, or goatee? Jason had a goatee usually. He'd go clean-shaven sometimes. Did you ever name your stuffed animals? I named every single one I got as a kid. Now I don't, really, unless they're really special. What’s the name of the person who cuts your hair? I'd rather not share, given her name is very unique. Do you like cheeseburgers? Yes, they're one of my favorite foods. Do you have a Flickr? Yes, but I don't use it anymore. Did you ever want to be a fashion designer? No. Do you drink milk? Yeah, I love milk. Where was your FB display pic taken? My room. Have you ever burnt your tongue like REALLY bad? If so, what on? Yeah; white rice. My dumb ass didn't realize it had JUST come off the stove. My tongue hurt literally for weeks. Have you ever gotten your legs waxed? No. Do you own any CLOTHES from Victoria’s Secret? Er, are undergarments not clothes? But I know what you mean. No. What are your grandfathers’ names? William and... I can't remember Dad's dad's name. Have you ever seen a snake in real life? Well yeah. Are you against seances? I don't know if I believe in them being effective, but either way, they seem like a bad idea. Even risking luring a negative energy/spirit to you is something I'd stay away from. Do you own any superhero shirts? No, just Harley Quinn ones, some with the Joker on them, too. I need to toss 'em though because I am like, violently against romanticizing their abusive relationship. I used to just like them as a story character couple, but I got to a place where it just seemed... wrong to "glorify" it by wearing merch and stuff. What band has the best guitar solos? Metallica, durrrr. Who is the biggest jerk you’ve ever met? Can you believe that would be my former best friend? Have you ever swerved off the road to avoid hitting an animal? I've never had an animal in my path. Have you ever grown your own herbs? No. Do you like kissing in public? If you're my serious s/o, I could care less, so long as it's a simple peck. I'm not making out in front of people. Do you think someone has feelings for you? I don't know. Do you want to be in a relationship this year? I don't know. I'm lonely and love feels amazing, but I need to get my life on track before I can be a good partner to someone and not just dead weight. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you? Huh, funny, he's the one that walked away. How long can you just kiss until your hands start to wander? Uhhh that would depend on how serious we are, where we are, and just what mood I'm in. What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you? ugh What’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for someone? also ugh What’s your dirtiest secret? TMI AHEAD. Probably receiving oral while bare-ass naked on the chaise in the living room while we were home alone. Or having sex in my sister’s bed. Oops. Would you ever get lyrics tattooed on yourself? Yeah. I already do, anyway, and I plan on getting another. Can you photoshop images well? I'm decent at it. Where did you last drive to? Mom and I went to go get our Covid vaccines today. What’s the first verse of the last song you listened to? "I don't know what we're supposed to be, but I know we lost it along the way to something better, something so much more than pleasure that we seek, so blind inside to fill these holes left by these lies that we tell to ourselves as we manufacture our own hell." What do you hear right now? The aforementioned song: "BLACKOUT" by 3TEETH. What was the last thing you laughed about? This is so fucking immature lmao but when we were driving earlier, we passed a gas station that had a sign that was advertising Coke, but due to space limitations, it abbreviated to "2 liter Cok" and I cackled like a child. Mom laughed harder than I did. Do you know any gay people personally? Ye. What was the last thing that startled you? I think it was a car hoonking at somebody the other day. What was the last thing to make you even remotely sad? Today's been a kind of rough PTSD day thanks to Facebook. My old high school friend had her beautiful daughter, a childhood friend just got married the other day, another friend is due to have her baby in just a couple weeks... It's just weird but even more painful to know it was the life I once fantasized about with a guy that just dropped me and made a break for it. I hate admitting that there's this deep, deep bitterness in me about it, like he took my life away from me, even though that's of course very unfair to say. I don't want to talk about this anymore, so moving on with my day.

[tomsnovia]

As Long As You’re Happy - G.D.

Y/N POV

It was my first flight back to LA after being with my family for just a little over three months. Spending the holidays back at home was always something that I looked forward to every year. Now that I live thousands of miles away from home I try to take times like these to my advantage to catch up with my family and finally just spend time with everyone. But at this point I was ready to go home. Back to the warm and sunny Los Angeles. Back to the little friends that I have made throughout my couple of years being there. Back to my tall, handsome, 200 pound beefy boyfriend, Grayson Dolan.

Today was Valentine’s Day. A day where everyone is supposed to celebrate their relationships with their significant others. I never really cared for this day. I mean I did spend a good portion of my life single but that is besides the point. Valentines Day was just another day for me up until last year. Last Valentines Day I finally got to experience what all the hype is about. And lucky for me it just so happened to be with someone like Grayson.

A couple of years ago I moved to LA to finally be able to pursue my dreams. Sure I was just barely getting started in the YouTube business but I felt like I was finally at a point in my career where I could potentially live off of the earnings that I made through the platform. My family supported me of course. My parents being more than willing to help aid me in anything financially if I needed (thank the lord). But I took this as an opportunity to finally live my life the way that I wanted. To finally be out in the world as a strong, independent woman (even though I am still technically a teenager).

The first few months of me being in LA went by pretty smooth. I finally met up with some fellow content creators who I have grown fairly close to in such a short amount of time. But this one day.. Whew! This one day is where everything changed for me.

*flashback*

I had gotten invited to a little celebration dinner by my friend Kyle Houck. He had been working on a project with a few of his friends for about a month or so. Kyle and I hadn’t really talked to each other for a while prior to this invitation just because he had been so busy with helping a couple of people film for their channel. So I had absolutely no idea what this celebration dinner was for or why he even invited me.

I of course accepted (mainly because I had absolutely no plans that night other than to lay in bed and watch Netflix or whatever) and found myself dressing semi formal for the occasion. Kyle kept the details very vague. He just told me to dress “kinda fancy but like not too fancy”. 

As soon as Kyle picked me up we wasted no time catching up with each other. I asked him what he had been up to and what he had been working on for the past month and he very excitedly told me that it was a documentary for his friends’ father. His friends who just so happened to be The Dolan Twins.

When I heard about the big project I felt.. a lot of things. One: Stoked and proud of Kyle. Two: like an absolute idiot that I had no knowledge of his relationship with a couple of very successful creators. I mean Kyle was my best friend.. How long was it since we last talked?.. Was I really living under a rock? UGH.

Once we finally arrived we met up with everyone who took part of the documentary.

“Hi,” I said as Kyle and I approached the twins.

“Hey guys, this is Y/N. She’s my friend from back home who I’ve been talking about,” Kyle said.

“Oh right! We heard a lot about you! It’s nice to finally put a face to a name,” Ethan chuckled. “Im Ethan,” he said pulling me into a hug.

“I’m Y/N, it’s nice to meet you,” I smiled hugging him back. The moment I let go of the hug my eyes immediately laid on what I believed to be one of the most beautiful human beings I have ever seen in my entire life. You know- not to be dramatic or anything..

“I’m Grayson,” he said also pulling me into a hug.

“It’s nice to meet you both. Congratulations on the documentary!” I said as we all made our way to the table. I sat next to Kyle, Grayson immediately sitting to my left. Ethan walked over to the other side of the table and sat next to a really pretty girl.

“I’m sorry I couldn't make it to the premier.. I didn't know that was a thing,” I said fixing my vision on Kyle.

“Im sorry! I completely forgot to mention it, my mind went straight to dinner” Kyle chuckled. I smiled and shook my head.

“So how have you been? How do you like LA so far?” Kyle asked as he took a sip of his drink.

“Uh.. well you know, its going okay I guess,” I shrugged. I had only been in LA for a couple of months and this technically is my first outing. I hadn't had much time to get out there because of all the unpacking, and my new found responsibilities taking over my life.

“If Im being honest, this is my first time actually going out since I moved in,” I said as I looked at the menu.

“No kidding?” Kyle asked.

“Kyle, you’re my only friend out here and you’ve been busy this whole time,” I chuckled.

“Fair enough,” he smiled. I skimmed over the menu trying to decide what I wanted to eat. For some reason my appetite completely vanished the second Kyle and I stepped foot into the restaurant.

I’ve never really been good at the whole socializing aspect of life. Being antisocial is sorta my cup of tea.

I sat there in silence, using the menu as an excuse for me not to talk. I was actually pretty focused until Grayson spoke up.

“So where are you from?” He asked as he put his menu down looking at me. If I’m being honest, the moment I made eye contact with Grayson my heart started to beat so fucking fast. His face lit perfectly despite the dim lighting in the restaurant. The way his hair slowly fell down the sides of his face when he would run his fingers through it. Oh what I would do to run my fingers through-

“Washington State,” I said quickly snapping out of my thoughts. “I just moved here a couple of weeks ago.”

“Oh wow! So you’re pretty new to the area?” He asked.

“Yeah.. which is why I haven't really had a chance to go out until tonight. I don’t know anyone besides Kyle here,” I chuckled.

Grayson smiled and nodded. “Well now you know me!”

_______________________________

The whole dinner went smoother than I thought it would. Grayson was very outgoing and easy to talk to and having Kyle there next to me helped ease the little tension I felt occasionally. The dinner was finally coming to an end and we were all getting ready to head home.

“Hey, what're you doing tomorrow?” Grayson asked looking down at me as we both stood up. I quickly took out my phone to check the date.

“Um.. nothing I guess?” I said looking up at him. “I’m most likely gonna end up unpacking some more stuff.”

“You want some help? We can go out to get some breakfast before or something?..” 

YES ARE YOU KIDDING ME? PLEASE LETS-

“Sure!” I smiled up at him. “Is 9 o’clock okay? I need to sleep in at least a little bit,” I laughed.

“Sounds perfect,” Grayson smiled and bit his bottom lip. “Can I get your number?”

“Of course,” I said taking his phone. I added my name into his contact list as “Y/N :)” just a little something quirky. idk. I’m not good at this.

__________________________________

1 New Message

Grayson: 9 AM it is! Can’t wait to bring you to THE BEST breakfast place in LA. Goodnight Y/N 😊

Me: Can’t wait! Goodnight Grayson.

Grayson: You can call me Gray 

Grayson: Only if you want to

Grayson: It's not a big deal if you don’t want to. I don’t want to make you do anything you don't want to do..

Grayson: Even if it is just a little nickname..

Grayson: Okay I’m sorry for the spam

I laughed.

Me: It’s okay! 😂 See you tomorrow. Goodnight Gray ☺️

Gray: Goodnight Y/N :)

_______________________________________

[ a/n: AHHHHHH here it is! the first part to my first series ahhhhhhh. idk how I feel about it tbh lol like I feel like its bad but im going to really take my time with this series just so I dont rush things. I genuinely want it to be good. pls let me know what you guys think. I won't take anything too harsh. ily all I hope you enjoyed even the tiniest bit ♥️

[peachyteabuck]

eye on the prize

summary: commission for astrid, who asked for chris evans x reader interview fluff.

pairing: chris evans x reader

words: 3,006

trigger warnings: RPF, slow burn, heavy flirtation, idiots in love, nondescript mentions of misogyny in the media as a business, a likely poorly reconstructed timeline (time fake and reality is a construct!)

ask box / masterlist / commission info / ko-fi

The hotel bed is large, big enough for four of you. The blankets are thick and the soft, the pillows a perfect balance of structured but plush. Sunbeams stream onto the mused sheets, warming your face. It’s nice, but only as nice as the calm before a major tropical storm can be. As your phone alarm blares next to you, you start to wonder if being caught in a category five hurricane would be better than press junkets.

A whole day talking to people about a movie you made months ago that you know jack shit about. Sometimes you have nightmares about giving a book report on a novel you’ve never even opened (you’re how old? And high school is still haunting you? Jesus, you need to go back to therapy) that cause you to break out in a cold sweat and kick all the covers from your bed and buy a bunch of stuff online to distract yourself from your racing heart and shaking hands.

Still, those are never as bad as interviewers asking about character arcs and plotlines and your relationship with actors you’ve barely (if ever) met and whatever else a normal interviewer would ask a normal interviewee when all you know is your character, the fact that she does shit with magic, and she’s Dr. Strange’s daughter. Anything other than that is anyone’s guess.

Your stylist and makeup artists are the ones to eventually drag you out of bed and plop you into hair and makeup after squeezing you into an incredibly tight pair of jeans and a non-controversial sweater. The forty-five minutes are a complete blur, but then again, nothing feels real until Sebastian hands you a large coffee in a travel cup that bares no logo or other kind of copywritten signifier – your knight in shining…cardboard? What are travel coffee cups even made of? Paper? Can paper even “shine?”

You’re nearly purring when the taste of caramel macchiato burns your tongue. “Ah. Thanks, Seb. I appreciate it.”

Sebastian shrugs, sipping at his own drink masquerading as generic brand. “No problem. I didn’t want you to bite an interviewer’s head off this morning. Or worse, mine.”

You play-hit him in the face and laugh with him, making small talk and trying to kill the time before the mind-numbingly long day really begins. You’re halfway through a rant about the woes of make up artists trying to put you in a full face of makeup to a man who barely has to put on concealer, the fucking asshat, when Chris makes an appearance.

“Hey, guys,” he’s is also drinking coffee from the unmarked travel cups. He looks you up and down before taking another sip. “You look really nice today.”

You blush, smoothing out your sweater – one of the color-blocked ones that sits at the intersection of casual, feminine, and not-intimidating. “Thanks, you too.”

Sebastian’s about to say something snarky when someone wearing a headset calls upon the three of you.

“Let’s get going, people!” she calls, ushering you into three barely-comfortable seats. You’re between Chris and Sebastian, the sheer mass of them making you feel approximately three feet tall. It doesn’t take much to forget how large they both are – even if Sebastian doesn’t weight two hundred pounds anymore and Chris was able to tone down his exercise regime since finishing Infinity War, you still feel like you’re sitting at the big-kid table for the first time.

The first interviewer is from some YouTube channel you only know because your fourteen-year-old niece gushes about them every family dinner. The woman who sits in front of you is young, cute. Dresses trendy, dark eye makeup and red lips.

She’s nice, too, along with being knowledgeable about the projects of each of you. She banters with Sebastian about his seven million movies before turning to you.  

The interviewer turns to you. “And you! You’re nominated for some pretty major awards!”

You smile wide, unable to help yourself. “Yeah, best actress and best original score.”

“That’s so cool,” Chris mumbles. You blush and pretend not to hear him as you speak again.

“It’s just super crazy,” you tell the interviewer. “Not even gonna lie. When I was younger, I would look at stars who like, cried when they found out they were nominated. Not even winning, just their name shows up on the ballot. But now I’m like, it’s me, two-time Grammy nominee! I was nominated for a Grammy, twice!”

Sebastian chimes in, laughing. “When we were at bunch together, I got there early and the caterer showed up and they were like, we’re here for the two-time Grammy nominee?”

“You had a brunch?” The interviewer asks.

You nod. “Yeah, I bunch of the Avengers cast and the cast from my last movie were in my hometown, which is super rare, so I hosted this giant brunch-”

“As one does,” Sebastian chimes in with a crooked smile.

You nearly hit him. “Yes! As I do! I wanted to see all my friends, whom I love, so I host a brunch. Sue me! Anyway…I hosted this brunch and invited a bunch of people over. Just a bunch of my favorite food from my favorite restaurants. Everyone I’d wanted to see for such a long time was there. It was amazing.”

The interviewer paints a faux frown across her face, looking at the man on your right. “Chris, you look very sad.”

“I didn’t get invited to the brunch,” Chris frowns. Unlike the woman in front of you, he looks genuinely sad. A twinge of pain bounces in your ribcage, and you rub his cardigan-clad back

“You were out doing Broadway shit!” you laugh. “You were halfway across the country!”

Chris continues to frown, staring at the printed-out pictures from the social medias of various guests. A few are from yours – you in a flowy sundress with your head thrown back laughing, a shot of you and a few of your friends from college drinking alcohol in the bright mid-afternoon sun. One you recognize from Sebastian’s Instagram, another from Hemsworth’s. A few from Twitter of a few of your non-movie-star friends. You look so happy in all of them, so beautiful in each shot. “I still wanted to be invited.”

You just roll your eyes. “Okay, call me when you’re in my region of the country and I’ll host a brunch,” You touch your forefinger to his nose. Chris blushes, profusely, in his cheeks and his ears. “just for you and me.”

You don’t hear much after that, too focused on Chris’ eyes meeting yours and his small smile. You’re taken aback by how sweet, tender he looks, and before you know it the interviewer is saying goodbye and the next one is taking her place.

It’s a man this time, a little older than the last one with artsy facial hair and a button hip. He mostly pays attention to the two men and soon your brain goes on battery-saver and you’re lost in your own thoughts.

Are hipsters still a thing? Is that what this guy is trying to be? Do hipsters even like Marvel? Is that too “mainstream for them?”

Eventually he asks a question about you, your recent entry into the Marvel Cinematic Universe, your music, your composing. You’d be happy to talk about your passions, of course you are, but the first genuine question of the interview is positing towards…not you. You’re about to tune everything out again, but then Chris speaks and you snap back to attention.

“It’s always interesting to meet people who bring something new to the art form, ya know? A huge part of acting is learning and evolving and all that, especially from other actors,” Chris avoids your gaze, and the gaze of everyone else, as he speaks. “If you stop learning, if you stop growing, what’s the point? Why would I do this job if I didn’t think it could change me for the better?”

There’s a moment of thick silence, the heavy weight of Chris’ introspective answer settling over the people in the room. It’s one of the things you lo-

It’s one of the things you enjoy most about Chris, how dedicated he is to acting as more than a job. It’s amazing, truly, how much he adores what he does. You could spend the rest of time with him, a plate of cheese, and a bottle of wine; listening to him talk about how he thinks of acting as an art, how that art can impact people and society, how actors have a responsibility to that art (that is, of course, after you mock him endlessly for Not Another Teen Movie and Fantastic Four).

You feel like a high schooler again, doodling your first and his last name in hearts in your math notebook with your favorite pink glitter pen. You’re an adult, why are you blushing red as a raspberry every time he says something smarter than a fast food order?!

The rest of the day goes down in a blur, the only time you start to care again when someone on the production staff calls for dinner (yeah, no lunch on press junket day. You can ask for a light snack, but you learned the hard way a full meal is “bad for your figure” and “makes you likely to burp on camera” and a bunch of other stuff you care very little about).

All three of you groan in happiness when you enter the room designated as craft, the thick smell of barbeque hitting you like a baseball bat. But a good baseball bat, though, like…one you ask to be hit with. Honestly, you have no idea what you’re talking about because you’re so hungry.

When you finally manage to scavenge food, Sebastian’s right behind you as you stare at a very delicious looking tray of pulled pork. Your plate is already full, but what if they take the food away? And then what if you get hungry later?

“You know he’s flirting with you, right?” he whispers as you watch the man in question scroll through Twitter on his phone. Chris is eating about the same thing you are, plus celery. You almost make a quip about it being “nature’s floss,” but then you realize that would be dumb because Sebastian definitely wouldn’t find it as funny as Chris would.  

You shrug, picking up a French fry from your plate. “Yeah, but you were, too.”

He scoffs into his second Americano of the morning. “Nah. Not like that. He likes you! He like likes you!”

“He does not-“

“And you like-like him!” He boops you on the nose and pinches your cheek like some sort of grandmother who hadn’t seen her fifteen-year-old son since he was five. “My little baby has a cruuuush!” he coos while making small kissy noises.

You’re about to bite back about how you’re not that much younger than him, but then the sound guy on the other side of the meat tray glares at the both of you. Looks like, while Chris couldn’t hear your bickering from the across the room, this dude definitely could – and he’s not very happy about it.

“Sorry,” you both mumble, shrinking away from the persecuting techie and his judgmental eyes.

Sebastian only talks again when you find an unpopulated corner, devoid of prying eyes and anyone who could be annoyed with the two of you gossiping like high schoolers.

“You know I’m not wrong, right?” he says around a bite of crisp apple. What is up with this guy and fruit?  Sure, he’s on a restrictive diet for a role to keep him from bulking up (something at the intersect of keto and vegetarian but able to eat lean meats) but he’s can’t eat like, the vegan stuff? Why must he always eat like rabbit in your presence? “Have you not seen what he says on Twitter?”

You scoff. “No, because I don’t have a Twitter. And neither do you!” You narrow your eyes accusingly. “How do you know what he posts?” Sebastian rolls his eyes. “I see screenshots on Instagram, first of all. Second, he could be complimenting your music on the inside of a cave. It’s about the principle.”

“That doesn’t make any sense,” you hiss. “Also, I’m done arguing with you about this. Let me find a cheeseburger and eat in peace. Is that too much a woman to ask, Sebastian!?”

He just laughs you off and lets you eat in peace, eventually getting his own food. Though, you suppose the meal was specially timed, because then Chris Evans is sitting next to you.

He’s about to say something, too, and you’re about to listen, but then you get called for an individual interview for a women’s health magazine and you have to leave him and you plate of food and fuck…you hate this job. A lot.

The interview is boring, once again, and the next time you have another coherent thought you’re taking the elevator back up to your hotel room and waving off your manager, who is telling you to be downstairs by seven tomorrow to catch your flight back home.

You’re just kicking off your heels when you hear a faint knock at the door. When you look through the peephole, you see a very sad-looking Christopher Evans. With his small frown and hunched shoulders, he looks like a kicked puppy; and even though all you want to do is take your bra off, you let him in.

He’s quiet for a moment before speaking as if he was a child preparing to be scolded.

“I lost my hotel key. And my backup got demagnetized.”

You bite back a laugh, trying to seem sympathetic. “Do you want to chill in here until security brings you another one?”

Chris nods solemnly as he steps through the threshold. “Thanks.”

Neither of you speak for a while, instead Chris looks around your quite messy (or “homey,” as you call it when you FaceTime your best friend and she scoffs at how easy you can make a room look like a hurricane tore through it) room and you…find an outfit for tomorrow?

You’re the first one to speak, only breaking the quiet after changing into fuzzy socks and sneakily taking off your lacey bra (and tucking it under the covers of the bed for you put away later).

“Well, that was excruciating,” you mumble. All you want to do is change into your biggest, most comfortable hoodie and your cotton panties and order room service and ignore humanity until you leave for a flight the next morning, but a man you’ve had a crush on since he appeared as Johnny Storm is right in front of you and after that talk with Sebastian your world is kind of shaken to its core and should you make a move? Is he the kind of guy to not like that? Would you want to be with a guy that doesn’t like that? What if he-

“Always are, I guess.” Chris interrupts your train of thought, saving it from going off the rails. When you at him he looks just as, if not more than, exhausted than you are. “That’s one of the things that you forget, I think. How hard it is to talk about these movies.”

You snort. Out of the corner of your eye, you can see Chris smile a little wider as you laugh. “Yeah. Other movies I can talk about like, characters and plots and shit. With these I live in constant fear I’m gonna pull a fucking Ruffalo and get my ass fired from the best paying gig I’ve ever had.”

Chris laughs with you, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Word.”

An awkward silence fills the room and you find something, anything to do to avoid his heavy gaze under those thick eyelashes and his thick beard that you just want to run your fingers through or his even softer hair that you want to mess up while you-

“Do you want to get dinner together sometime?” you blurt. You’re ready to take back the words as soon as you say them, wanting to backtrack or say “just friends” or “ha-ha, just kidding!” or something else that absolves you of non-platonic commitment.

By a long stretch of luck that you can’t even begin to thanks a long number of deities for, Chris doesn’t laugh at you or turn you down or even walk out of the room. He meets your gaze with excitement in his eyes and a smile wider than your home state. “I’d love to,” is all he says. It’s all either of you get to say before his phone rings loudly, and the name of the head of security flashes on his screen. He sighs loudly, apologizing as he takes it. Somehow, you feel more awkward as he turns away and answers the call. You fidget with your hands, with a loose thread on the sweater you’ve come to hate more than anything else in the world, with your phone. Nothing makes it easier to face Chris again once he hangs up.

“That was…,” he laughs lightly. Not laughing at you, maybe at life or how weird his life is, but never at you. “You know. They fixed my key and want to give it to me in person.”

You swallow and nod. “Yeah, understandable. I’ll, uh,” you clear your throat. “I’ll see you…”

Chris finishes for you. “How about we find a good restaurant near here after I’m confirmed to actually be me by the private security detail our employers hired to make sure no one kills us? We can have that second dinner I’ve heard you always eat late at night.”

Holy shit…he remembered that time you vaguely mentioned how much you enjoy staying up late and eating lots of food. It makes you blush as you respond.

“Yeah that sounds,” you sigh happily, smile just as big as his is. “That sounds great.”

[dyscrasia-eucrasia]

<<Prev | Next>>

Part 14

Demie fidgeted nervously as he listened to the dial tone on the other end of the line. For once in the past few weeks, he wasn't calling Angel. Which made his anxiety feel even weirder - Angel should've been the one he should be worried about talking to, since he was an outsider. If Demie was making the wrong choice in trusting him, the results could be disastrous. 

So why did he feel totally comfortable talking to Angel, but not to his own brother?

"Hello?" Marius said when he picked up the phone. Demie's heart rate spiked. Marius used to be the one thing that kept him calm, but since he'd moved to California, he mostly just gave Demie more anxiety. Sometimes it was because he didn't have anyone around to calm him down, other times it was because he was worried about how the human world was treating his brother. 

"Hey bro," Demie replied. "I'm not interrupting anything, am I?"

He secretly hoped he was, so that he could get out of the phone call quicker. Even though he was the one who'd initiated it. 

"Nah. I did a recording sesh in the morning, that seems to be the best time to do 'em. All the actual stars are too lazy to get out of bed before like 1am, so I get the studio all morning long. They better watch their asses, 'cause I'm comin' for 'em." 

A year and a half in California had changed Marius, as far as Demie could tell. It was mostly in the voice. He said things that he never used to say, in a way he never would've said them. It was oddly painful. Like every time they talked, the brother Demie had known was being replaced piecemeal with some Californian superstar. Even his rural West Virginian accent had pretty much faded away. 

"Cool," Demie said. He wasn't sure what else to say. He could picture Mar in a real recording studio, and he had to admit it suited his brother. Meanwhile, he and Elaine still recorded in a shed that was sound-proofed with old egg cartons. He felt inadequate, but at the same time like that was all he deserved. 

"So what's up, little man?" Mar asked. "You haven't called in a while." 

"Yeah I have, I called back in…" How long ago had he called? "I called during Lupercalia." 

"Yeah bro, that was in February." 

"So?" 

"It's almost June." 

"...Oh. Sorry, I've… I've had stuff going on." 

"Really." Marius sounded a touch incredulous. Demie didn't blame him - he'd never had anything going on. Marius was the one with the big plans, Elaine was the one with the job, and Demie… he knew that they still saw him as the baby of their weird little family. A 25 year old baby that towered over both of them, but still a baby that didn't have any responsibilities and who needed to be taken care of and protected from the outside world. 

Not like he was bitter, or anything. He appreciated that they looked out for him, and he'd be the first to admit that his anxiety did make it hard to fully care for himself. But was it really so hard to believe that he did stuff without either of them present? 

"Yeah, uh… I've been talking to people." 

"What, like our cousins? Or the maenads?" 

"No, with, like… a normal human." 

"Hmm." 

"Are you going to yell at me like Elaine did and tell me I'm being stupid for talking to him?" 

"Oh, it's a 'him', huh?" Marius asked. His tone was a lot lighter than Elaine's, and Demie was grateful. He didn't think he could withstand being yelled at again. "How'd you meet him?" 

"Elaine and I did this show in Charleston, and he just started talking to me after the show. And, like… he didn't seem like the kinda guy who'd listen to our music, but he's really into the band. And we talk on the phone a lot, and it's just… nice." 

"Okay…" Marius said, in a tone that implied he knew there was more to the story. 

"And, like… I think I actually made a friend, and I wanna like… do shit that friends do. Like have some beers or go out shooting or whatever. In person." 

"Does he know you're a satyr?" 

"Not yet, but like… he's a gay guy, they have to be in the closet, right? I don't think he'd blow our cover." 

"Hm. He's gay, huh?" 

Demie furrowed his brow. "Why are you and Elaine so surprised by that? I'm not a homophobe, I'm fine with gay people. Just as long as they don't try anything funny." 

"No, that wasn't what I… nevermind." 

"Are you going to tell me this is a bad idea?" Demie asked. 

"Actually, no," Marius responded, barely taking time to think about it. "You need some friends. I was hoping that you'd come out to Cali with me and start having an actual social life, but that didn't happen. I've honestly been kind of worried about you, cooped up with just Elaine and the goats and the video store." 

"I can't go to the video store anymore," Demie admitted, despondent. "There was this video…" 

"I know. Elaine sent it to me. I tried to call you to talk about it, but every time I tried I got the busy signal. I guess that was you talking to your friend?" 

"Oh, yeah. I remember hearing it do that a few times. I don't know how to put a call on hold and I figured if it was important, whoever was calling would call back." 

"Well, I definitely tried to call back, guess I just got bad timing." 

"Yeah, well… we're okay. I was the one who shot at them, I thought they were just drunk kids out trespassing." 

"Probably a good thing you did," Marius said. "I subscribed to their channel just in case there were any more updates, but it looks like you really spooked them. They didn't go back to Billy Brook, just went on to some two-headed goat taxidermy in some other town." 

"Good. Fuck those jackasses. Last thing we need is more cryptozoologists coming out here." 

"I think you're safe for now," Marius said. "Those guys… they're a very specific breed of jackasses. There's tons of them here in L.A. They're not actually in it for the cryptids, they just want more views so they can make brand deals to sell amphetamines to tech bros." 

"Whoa, really? They're selling meth out in L.A.? I thought they all did, like, weed and coke out there." 

"Well, I mean, it's not actual meth, it's ADD meds and this stuff called 'nootropics'... but it's basically meth." 

"What, have you tried it?" 

"Kinda. My exec gave me Adderall when I was going through a writer's block. It felt pretty good, I got really focused, but the stuff I wrote was crap. That kinda drug high just doesn't hit the same as the Frenzy." 

"Wow. Weird. Hey, speaking of the Frenzy, are you actually gonna show up to the Bacchanalia this year?" 

"Hmm, that depends. The label's pushing for a tour this summer. I'll try, though. I really don't like missing it." 

"You should be there. It's not as much fun being there on my own. Everyone was peer-pressuring me to be part of the orgy last year." 

"You know you can just be part of the orgy, right? You're an adult, you can go have group sex." 

"Yeah, but it's like… too many guys. It's too gay." 

"Ah, yeah, that's right, you can't see another satyr's penis in the middle of an orgy. That would just be too gay." 

"Exactly." 

"Alright, well… good luck with your friend, okay? I'm glad you found someone to talk to, really." 

"Thanks, bro." 

"And don't wait three months to call me next time!" 

"Yeah sure, whatever, Mom." 

The two brothers laughed as they both disconnected the call.

[purplesurveys]

851

How have you been feeling lately? Have you been doing ok? Uncomfortable because of period cramps and the heat WHICH IS STILL HERE, even though it’s supposed to be gone right about now and it’s supposed to be raining at this point. I wish I was kidding saying this but we literally have three electric fans turned on just for the living and dining rooms. It’s crazy and stupid and it shouldn’t be this hot anymore. I’m doing better mentally and emotionally, so at least that balances things out lol.

Are you currently in quarantine? Still am. While all countries are slowly going back to normal, our Covid cases continue to get higher and higher everyday because our government hasn’t done anything except to make us stay home for three months. No mass testing, no alternate public transport plans, and for some reason Duterte keeps borrowing billions of dollars’ worth of loans from the World Bank nearly every week, and we have no idea where the stupid fucking money goes. Our government is convinced they’ve been doing everything right so they’ve loosened up quarantine protocols, so with malls and restaurants being open again we’ve done nothing but reach record high cases almost every day.

Do you wear a mask when you go to the store? I’ve gone outside a total of three times since March and I wore a mask for two of those times. The first time I went out I just genuinely forgot to bring a mask, but in the end it was fine because I only had to stay in the car.

Does your state require people to wear masks in stores? As far as I know it’s not a requirement per se, but fortunately everyone follows the safety precautions anyway.

Do you know anyone who’s had the coronavirus? Yeah, my mom’s former boss. This is a bit of a stretch but I also know someone personally who had immediate family members that tested positive.

What was the last sweet treat you ate? I had a peanut butter doughnut from J.CO! Soooooooo good.

Was it a nice day out today? No, it’s too hot. Even if life was normal rn I’d prefer to be indoors with air conditioning, like a mall.

Is the weather nice where you live usually? Fuck no. It is disgustingly hot, sticky, and humid 3/4 of the year.

What was the last thing you ordered online? I don’t do a lot of online shopping. When I get something online it’s usually to get food delivered, and the last time I did that it was me and Andrew getting Hong Kong noodles.

Are you expecting a package right now? Nopes.

Have you ever ordered anything from Wish? If so, what did you buy, and did you feel it was worth it? No, though I remember Good Mythical Morning featuring it in a couple of episodes. I don’t feel comfortable buying from stores or sellers that sell things for a lot cheaper because they could always be fake, so I wouldn’t feel comfortable buying from that site.

Are you a youtuber? If so, are you consistent with uploads? and how many subscribers do you have? I’m not, but I do have my own channel. I just use it to like videos and subscribe to my favorites, though.

What is one thing you hate about summer? The weather. Honest to goodness I’d really rather live somewhere that gave me -40C weather everyday.

Did you go outside today? No. My dad wanted to bring Cooper to my grandma’s place and I planned to come along, but at the last minute he changed his mind and did just the errands he was supposed to do.

What is the name of your youtube channel, if you have one? It’s just my full name because my YouTube is linked to my Google account.

What was the name of the last store or restaurant that overcharged you? I don’t know any instances where that would happen. I don’t find service charge inconvenient because I know that directly goes to the servers anyway so I don’t mind how high it gets most of the time. Is your room more often messy or clean? It’s clean most of the time but sometimes when I’m busy I won’t be able to keep it clean and it’ll be clean-messy? Like I’ll leave stuff around but I’ll still know where everything is lol.

Who is someone you miss? ALL MY FRIENDS BRUH

What is something you miss? Being able to go out and freely do activities. Life Pre-COVID < Life pre-COVID, perfectly put. I miss getting an allowance, being out until midnight, having dates with my girlfriend thhe most.

Do you feel like your emotions are often haywire? Not necessarily, but they can get pretty unstable sometimes.

Have you ever received a misdiagnosis from a doctor? Nah but I’ve been given a prescription that didn’t work. We went to our family doctor who made me take a certain medicine for three days, and I started getting worried when three days had passed and I still had my fever. I went to Angela’s mom and she was super quick to tell me that that medicine wasn’t the right one to take for a UTI and prescribed me with something else; and that second one ended up working like magic.

Have you ever been “diagnosed” with a mental illness from an online friend? who is not a doctor? If yes, isn’t that frustrating? That’s never happened before, but if it did I wouldn’t let my frustration get the best of me. I’d just tell them that they should avoid doing that if they’re not a professional because they could very much end up seriously harming people.

Do you have any friends that you can trust and tell everything to? All of them.

What was the name of your favorite roommate you’ve had? Kimi :)

Do you have a favorite book that you’ve read multiple times? Yeah when I was a kid I would reread this book that an aunt had given me for Christmas as much as I could. For many years I forgot the title but after painstakingly Googling the few keywords I could remember I finally found out it again – it’s a series called Three Girls in the City by Jeanne Betancourt, but I only ever read the first book because it was the only gift I got. It’s not my favorite book, but I’d be so happy if I got to be reunited with it again because I don’t think we got to keep it around when we moved houses.

What’s one book or book series that you’ve read multiple times? ^ That, multiple wrestling memoirs, and Norwegian Wood by Haruki Murakami. I’ve also reread the Twilight Saga once.

What was the name of the funniest kid you’ve ever babysat? I never babysat anyone other than younger relatives, but the one I enjoyed taking care of the most was my cousin Lucas. He was the smartest kid I babysat so it was fun talking to him, plus his yaya was always nice to me, they had a playground and sandbox at home, and all I had to do was keep him company while he watched Thomas and Friends over and over.

Do you enjoy babysitting? Just the younger relatives that were smarter and more behaved. I didn’t like the kids who thought kicking and being rowdy were fun.

Do you have any big regrets? One big one.

Are there things about your past that bother you? Of course. My entire childhood is one.

What was the last thing you saw or read on social media that made you angry? OMG get ready for this one. Our dumb as a rock presidential spokesperson was talking about how happy he is that the country beat UP’s (my school, which the government hates because we always talk shit about them lol) prediction of 40,000 Covid cases by the end of June if the government doesn’t do anything to prevent more cases. How many cases do we have? Fucking 36,000. Our government is happy because they finally beat our school over something for the very first time and they are technically happy that we got 36,000 cases, which if you round up will give you 40,000 anyway. My school had a fucking FIELD DAY over it and now he is a national meme.

Do you often post about controversial topics on facebook? At first I didn’t but that’s because I wasn’t active on Facebook in the past anyway. After I realized that I had a bigger friends list on Facebook I decided to put it to good use and post about controversial topics to educate others. It’s made a bunch of conservative family members uncomfortable and that’s the goal, son. 

Do you think it’s a good idea to post about serious topics on social media? or do you think that it’s better to discuss serious topics in person? It definitely is. In person is good too but you don’t always get that opportunity, so sharing stuff through social media doesn’t hurt too as long as information is accurate. For instance most of my relatives life far from me, so if I want them to get a piece of my mind about Trump or BLM or abortion, sharing informative graphics and tables is always convenient.

What was your favorite book you had to read for school? Without Seeing the Dawn by Stevan Javellana is my absolute favorite. It’s probably the closest thing to being my favorite book. Number the Stars by Lois Lowry is a good runner-up. On the other hand, Dekada ‘70 by Lualhati Bautista is my favorite that was written in Filipino.

Have you ever failed a class and had to repeat it? Nope. I really believe I was meant to fail algebra in my freshman year in high school because I failed every exam, but I think my teacher just took pity on me and gave me a barely-passing mark at the end of the year so that I didn’t have to go to summer school. As for college, I’ve never failed a class.

What class in school did you hate the most? In college I hated my economics elective. I still don’t know why that’s mandatory for us journ students... I also dreaded a couple of journalism classes, but it was more because of the teachers than the classes’ topics.

Have you ever wanted to be a teacher? I don’t think so.

What’s one childhood dream that has stuck with you, and one that has not? Having a big house; becoming a firefighter.

Would you want to re-live your childhood over again if you could? I’ve already said it on this survey, but: fuck no. I’m ok where I am now, even if I am a clumsy adult.

Which do you like more: being an adult or being a kid? Being an adult. Being a kid meant having to stomach the smell of hard alcohol and cigarettes from morning to evening everyday; being caught in the middle of screaming matches between drunk relatives; and being cramped in a single-floor home with 12 people. Like I said, I love where I am now. The amount of independence I gained in college was freeing and felt so nice and I’m glad my parents never tried holding me back. I’m also glad that I didn’t fall into the same alcohol trap, and that I know how to deal with my alcohol responsibly.

At what age were you when you started to feel like you were mature enough to offer others advice? Around college-age, so like when I turned 18.

Did your parents smoke or drink when you were growing up? Neither of them did, because we had enough alcoholism happening at my old home. It was actually my drunken relatives that finally drove my mom out of that house.

Do you enjoy bonfires? I’ve only been to one and I was like 9 years old then, so I wouldn’t know how I feel about them now.

Have you ever stepped on a sparkler? Nope.

What, do you know of, are you allergic to? No allergies.

Have you ever ridden in an ambulance? Also nopes. I always feel bad for the ambulances that I see because I live in a very traffic-heavy city and they always end up getting stuck and crawling through traffic like the rest of us. We do try to swerve, but our roads are so tiny and always cramped that there’s little space left for us to move out of the ambulance’s way, so even though we’re able to make a path for it, the space is not big enough for the ambulance to drive in the speed it’s supposed to.

What is your favorite version of the Bible to read, if applicable? That’s a big no thanks from me.

Do you follow trends? or are you a trendsetter? Yeah, I follow some of them if I think they are nice.

Has anyone ever described you as a trendsetter? Nope, because I am not.

Do you know anyone who used to be loving, but then turned cold? List three people you’ve known whom this has happened to. My mom, Athenna, Macy. The only person I don’t resent out of these three is Macy, because I know she turned distant due to mental health issues and because she wants to fix herself first, which is responsible.

What SAT subjects, if any, did you get a perfect score in? We don’t have SAT.

What were your best subjects in school? and what was your favorite subject in school? I loved taking history electives in college, and I performed the best in them too. I also did well in international relations, which was under the political science department.

Have you ever been abused by a parent or legal guardian? I’ve been verbally and emotionally abused by my mom ever since I can remember.

Do you have a lot of wounds from your past? If we’re getting visual then I’d rather say that I have one ugly, infected gash that gets bothersome from time to time. My past isn’t made up of little tiny scattered wounds.

Has anyone ever called you a jerk? Behind my back, probably.

Are you a jerk? I can be, so I don’t mind being called it. I never said I was the nicest person.

What color were your bedroom walls in high school? They have always been white. My mom doesn’t let us have control over our own rooms, so in the beginning it’s always been plain boring white. Don’t get me wrong, I like my room but sometimes it just feels like living in a cell.

Is there a girl or guy you wish you hadn’t let slip away? I wish I was still close with my high school friends, and I remember saying how they were for keeps in my old surveys so that makes me extra sad haha. I’m civil with most of them, but no longer close. And I only ever talk to them if it’s their birthdays or if they achieved something big. The only people I’ve remained close with from that original group are Angela and Hans.

Is there an old friend that you miss and would like to reconnect with? Not really. Sofie and I have grown apart from each other now and we’re both very happy, so there’s no need to change that. I’m okay with seeing her once or twice a year.

Who has hurt you the most? My mom.

Have you been bullied? Yeah in kindergarten. Long-lasting effects though.

Which talent show, if any, would you most like to audition for? and have you auditioned for one? No thanks. I don’t have the kind of talent that I can show off, like singing or playing an instrument.

Do you know anyone who’s auditioned for American Idol? I don’t think so. But my mom knows someone who auditioned for our local version of America’s Got Talent. He’s a ventriloquist that my mom used to get for our parties. As far as I know he got into the grand finals, but I’m not sure if he won.

Is there someone you think should audition that hasn’t yet? American Idol’s been over for a while now.

What time of day do you usually feel your best? I love the evenings.

What’s one way in which you’ve changed within the last ten years? I was in sixth grade then, I’ve graduated from college now. My mom was purely verbally abusive to me then, now we have brief stints of having an actually healthy relationship. I had one dog then and I have two dogs now; I had no friends then and I have tons of them now. There’s been a lot of tiny changes but nothing that were life-changing.

Do you feel like time goes by fast, or slow? It goes both ways depending on how stimulated I am or how much fun I’m having.

Who do you know who has died of cancer? One of my great-aunts.

Has there been cancer in your family? Yeah, ^ that. Other than her I’m not sure if we’ve had other cases. My family tends to be hush-hush about cancer and only ever call it ‘c’ or ‘the big one.’

Have you ever stayed overnight in a hospital, and if so, what for? Yes, once for a low platelet count.

Have you ever been a victim of police misconduct? No but the cops here are just as corrupt as the ones in the US, so I can very much be a victim any time. It’s just a matter of being in the wrong place at the right time.

Have you ever been so angry you wanted to sue someone? Not so much that I wanted to sue someone, no.

Have you ever been a victim of racism? My country isn’t diverse at all and we’re all Filipinos here, and I’ve only ever traveled to Asian countries, so no. But racism is a big reason why I have no plans to go to other countries known for it.

Have you ever deleted a friend on Facebook for making racist comments? I’ve unfriended those who were being little bitches about BLM and George Floyd’s death, so I guess that kinda counts as being racist. I still have a few racist Facebook friends that I keep around, but that’s because they’re family members.

What was the last thing you ate? Binagoongan.

What was the theme of your senior prom? Clair de Lune, so like the moon and shit.

Did you go to prom? It was mandatory, so I had to go even though I really had no interest.

Have ever been engaged or married? I have been neither.

Are you an aunt or uncle? Nah but I’m a godmother to one of my cousins.

Do you live to glorify God and to do His will? LOL no

Are you happy with the way you are living your life day-to-day right now? It could be better and more filled with activity. But I’m not miserably depressed right now and that’s more than enough for me.

Do you feel like your life was better or worse six years ago? It was slightly better. I feel like 2014 was my best year.

Have you ever made a huge, catastrophic mistake? Not anything that ruined my life or someone else’s, no.

Do you feel like you are currently in a state of suffering? and that not all of your basic needs are being met? If so, how long have you been in a state of suffering? Basic needs?? So you mean poverty? No.

Do you hate social injustice? Absolutely. Anyone who tolerates it is automatically a gigantic prick, I’d say.

Are you happy with the current social class you are in? No. I don’t know how it translates to English, but in Filipino we have this term called naghaharing-uri that comprises the very very very very tiny top of the social pyramid and it’s made up of top government officials and their families, heads of corporations, old money families, etc. It’s no secret that it’s this 1% that exploits the 99% remaining in the pyramid, so even though I’m relatively comfortable in my class, I hate that, when it comes down to it, we’re only being used by this 1% for their own benefit.

Life isn’t fair. True or false? True.

Do you hate that life is so unfair? Sometimes, if it’s for stuff about social injustice and how some people have to be homeless, why homophobia exists, etc. But if it’s for tiny problems, I feel like they’re necessary sometimes so we can learn from them.

Name a few people who seem to have everything handed to them. Some richer kids that I know.

Who do you go to when you’re upset? Sometimes myself, sometimes Gabie.

Do you pray less or more than you did 5 years ago? A LOT LESS, thank fuck I got out of that trap.

Do you pray a lot? Definitely not.

Do you frequently have back pain? Yeah, haha. Kinda expected considering I have scoliosis.

What’s the worst side effect you’ve experienced for a medication? and what’s the worst withdrawal effect you’ve experienced from a medicine? Nothing worse than diarrhea. I’ve never experienced withdrawal.

Have you ever used an epi pen? Nopes.

What’s a name that you like but probably wouldn’t use for one of your kids? Isabella because I’m already an Isabelle and my girlfriend has a sister named Isabela.

What’s your name, and do you like it? Robyn. I like it now.

Would you prefer to give your kids common names or unique names? Common, more old-school names. I just feel like they sound super elegant.

Do you feel like anybody values you in the way that you deserve? Angela, Andrew, and Gab.

Who have you felt the most valued by? ^ Them.

Have you ever been treated like you were inferior? For sure.

What was the name of the biggest bully in your high school? Oh my god this survey is so long... we didn’t have bullies in high school. We had mean girls and mean girl cliques, but as long as you weren’t involved in drama with them you’d be fine.

Do you ever sleep outside? Nah. I’d sleep at the rooftop but there are sooooo many mosquitoes at night.

How many siblings do you have? Two.

Are you the oldest, youngest, middle, or only child? Eldest.

How many kids do you want to have? One or two would be great.

Do you want to get married? Yessssssss.

Best date you’ve been on? Probably that time we went to BGC so we can feel fancy and have a fancy dinner, then when we meant to walk back to our car to go home we ended up having impromptu drinks at like 11 PM when we randomly found a jazz bar loudly playing live music in the area. OH and that time we went museum hopping in Manila and we ended the day having delicioussss Italian food.

Dream date? Traveling out of the country.

Ever kissed someone on New Year’s? Nah. We celebrate New Year’s with our respective families so there’s no chance of that happening. Which is fine, because New Year’s is traditionally a family-centric holiday here so it would be weird for anyone to ditch their families.

Have you ever had an experience so good you felt like you were flying? Sure.

Have you ever been in so much pain you prayed that you would die? YES, with my toothache last year.

What brings you the most joy? My dogs.

What is your passion; what is it that would bring you the most joy and fulfillment in life? I’m at a point where it still keeps changing, so I don’t wanna give an absolute answer to this just yet.

Have you ever laid your dreams aside because someone else wanted you to? That’s never happened to me. I only ever gave up on one dream because it realistically wasn’t attainable, when it came down to it.

Who supports you in everything you do? My two best friends.

Who always tries to stop you whenever you try to go after your dreams? I haven’t had anyone bar me, but if someone tried to they would definitely hear from me.

Do you believe in following your heart, in going after your dreams? Not always.

Do you wish other people would want you to be happy? Of course.

Do you wish you had someone who loved and supported you? I already do.

[sapphiclecterarchive]

the babysitter - fic

Fandom: MCU, Spiderman

Character(s): Peter Parker

Desc.: In which Peter is trusted with a child.

A/N: i’ve never posted any fics on tumblr so i thought i’d give it a shot! this will also be on my ao3 if you fancy sending it some love over there. SORRY if this is indecipherable, it was written in 3 days in amongst a mad panic to finish art coursework

WARNING FOR ENDGAME SPOILERS. SO MANY SPOILERS. OH MY GOD THERE ARE SO MANY SPOILERS IN THIS

Peter really isn’t expecting the call.

May is working a late night at the shelter, which she’d explained with a concise note left in the middle of the kitchen counter, underneath a twenty dollar bill for takeout. The takeout guy is the only person he’s expecting to encounter this evening, besides the Instagram group chat which buzzes every two minutes and John Mulaney on Netflix. That’s until his phone rings.

The number isn’t saved on his phone, so he almost doesn’t answer it. It’s only when he realises that it could be May calling in an emergency, or Ned or MJ or anyone else, that anxiety forces him to pick the phone up. The line between his Spidey senses and generalised anxiety disorder is a thin one that he treads very carefully.

“Hello?”

The woman on the other end of the line sighs in relief, “Peter, thank God you picked up.”

He recognises her voice instantly - from the news, from the battle, from the funeral. He scrambles to find the remote and pause the TV.

“Mrs Potts? Why are you — what is — uh — how are you?”

They haven’t spoken since the wake, when she’d hugged him and let him cry into her shoulder. His heart seizes at the memory of her calm composure, supporting a boy she barely knew while he fell apart over the death of the man she loved.

“I’m doing alright, thank you,” she answers. “I have a favor to ask.”

“Okay.”

“Would you be able to babysit Morgan for a few hours?” Peter’s hand freezes on it’s way to the bag of Cheetos next to him on the couch. “I wouldn’t normally ask with such little notice, but I have to do some stuff for the Foundation launch, and our regular sitter fell through.”

“That’s no problem at all,” Peter says, without even thinking about it. “I didn’t have plans, anyway.”

Pepper exhales with relief, ���That’s amazing. I’ve sent Happy to pick you up, he should be there soon. Thank you so much, this is such a big help.”

As soon as he places his phone down, Peter realises that he knows absolutely nothing about taking care of a kid, and that he’s currently in nothing but ratty sweatpants and an old sports jersey.

He practically launches himself over the back of the couch, abandoning his show and his takeout to race into his bedroom. His pyjamas are replaced with black jeans and a thick wool sweater over a tshirt, and he just manages to comb through his hair and spray himself with deodorant before his phone chimes from the couch and he races to check it.

Unknown Number: Outside. – Happy

He texts May to let her know where he’s going while he bounds down the stairs. Sure enough, Happy is waiting on the sidewalk, leaning up against a black car.

To Peter’s surprise, Happy ignores his offered handshake and instead pulls him in for a hug. The embrace lasts a long few seconds before Happy pulls back, his hand lingering on Peter’s shoulder. “How you holding up, kid?”

“Okay,” Peter says. Happy opens the passenger side door for Peter and rounds the car to get in behind the wheel. The doors slam, and Peter talks over the starting of the engine. “School’s getting intense, and — uh — everyone’s getting excited for prom. But, uh… Yeah, that’s sort of it.”

Happy glances at him out of the corner of his eye as he pulls the car out into the road. “Prom, huh? You got your eye on anyone? Planning a…. what do you call it? A promposal?”

Peter thinks about MJ, about Ned, about Betty, about the guy in his physics class who always lets him share his textbook when Peter forgets… “I haven’t really thought about it, uh, with everything going on.”

“I getcha, kid.” They come to a slow stop at a red light. “These past months have been pretty intense… I haven’t really known what to do with myself, to be honest.”

His voice has grown quiet, and the last word of the sentence almost dies completely. Peter looks over at him as he scrubs a hand over his face. Is he crying?

Happy is covering his face with one of his hands, now, shoulders shaking minutely. Peter has no idea what to do. What are you supposed to do when your dead mentor’s assistant who hated you not that long ago is suddenly crying in front of you?

“Uh… Happy?” He gets no reply. “Happy?”

“Yeah, kid?” Happy looks up at him, his eyes tear-filled and puffy but a supportive smile on his face all the same.

“The light’s green.”

As if on cue, the car behind them beeps it’s horn, spurring Happy into moving the car forward.

Pepper Potts is waiting for them when they arrive at the house. It looks no different to how it did at the funeral, and it upsets him a little to look at the front porch and the small dock where they’d stood to say their final goodbye. She gives him a very brief tour of the house, and an explanation of Morgan’s bedtime routine. Apparently, she has already had her bath and her dinner, so the only thing Peter has to do is put her to bed by eight.

“There’s enough food in the refrigerator and the pantry for you to make yourself something to eat, feel free to watch whatever you want on the TV, and I should be home by eleven, but if you’re tired by then you’re welcome to sleep in the guest room.” She pauses, taps her fingertips together as if checking off a list, and then drops her hands and smiles warmly at him. “I really can’t thank you enough for doing this.”

How could he have said no? He understands more than anyone what grief feels like, and if the obvious exhaustion underlying her composed expression is anything to go by, being suddenly thrust into single parenthood has taken its toll on her. He remembers May wearing the same expression after his Uncle Ben died, and he knows now how much she’d needed an extra pair of hands.

“It’s really no problem, Mrs Potts.”

Her petite hand brushes his elbow, “Please, call me Pepper.”

She then crouches down to say goodbye to Morgan, and he politely looks away, for some reason he feels like that moment deserves privacy.

“You’ve got my number, so if there’s anything you need you can either call me or Happy, okay?” she assures him.

“Okay, Mrs — Pepper.”

She smiles, nods, and gives Morgan one last kiss on the cheek before leaving.

“We’ve got about forty minutes to kill before bedtime.” He looks down at the young girl. “What do you want to do?”

“Cartoons!” she exclaims, a gleeful grin on her pudgy face.

“Cartoons?” He turns toward the couch, expecting her to follow him. She grabs three of his fingers with her small hand and walks ahead of him, as if guiding him to the couch. He doesn’t have to wonder where she gets that from.

“Cartoons,” she clarifies, jumping up onto the couch with a huff.

He sits next to her and picks up the remote to start looking for the kids’ channels. “What’s your favorite cartoon?”

“Spongebob!” she says around her thumb.

It takes him all of five minutes to scroll through the entire TV guide and finally assess that there isn’t one channel currently playing an episode of Spongebob. Or any cartoons, it seems. He’s about to give up, when she holds out her hand.

“Remote.” The ‘R’ is more of a ‘W’, and she makes a grabby hand toward the remote until he passes it to her.

“There are no channels playing cartoons…” he begins to explain, bracing himself for a five-year-old temper tantrum. Instead of screaming or crying, however, he’s greeted with the familiar opening note of the Spongebob theme tune.

When he looks at her, she’s looking back at him with a cheeky grin. “How did you figure that out?”

“Mummy got it on the TV for me.” Her speech is pretty advanced for a five year old, but it’s obvious how hard she’s working to get her words right. “She said so I can watch it when I’m sad.”

His eyebrows knit together, and he fears sounding like a counsellor - or a parent - but he can’t help but ask, “Are you sad a lot?”

She shrugs, jams her thumb in her mouth and talks around it, “I watch Spongebob a lot.”

He ends up watching her more than he watches the cartoon, mesmerised by her starry-eyed expression as she watches the bright colours flash across the screen. They reflect in her big brown eyes, which he knows that she inherited from her dad. She also inherited her stubbornness, apparently, because even when her eyelids begin to droop and she can hardly sit upright for sleepiness, she doesn’t give in. She refuses to doze off until the end credits of the episode are rolling, and then she almost instantly collapses, snoring lightly, onto the couch cushions.

Careful not to wake her, he slips his arms underneath her armpits and lifts her. Her arms and legs wrap around him sleepily, making it much easier for him to carry her upstairs without fear of dropping her. He pushes the door open with the heel of his shoe, uses his right hand to continue supporting Morgan’s weight while his left pulls back the covers on her small bed. Once he’s placed her down and tucked the blanket up to her chin, he follows Pepper’s instructions of shutting the blind, turning on the nightlight next to her bed, and leaving the door slightly ajar when he eventually steps back out into the hall.

The TV is still displaying the paused credits of Spongebob when he sits back down on the couch. He wants to go onto Netflix and carry on with what he was watching earlier, but he feels like it might be a bit of an intrusion to use Pepper’s personal Netflix account, so he settles on a channel that seems to be only playing reruns of Family Guy.

His phone buzzes, and he glances at where it sits next to him on the couch.

Ned: Deathmatch?

Peter can’t help his smile. After Thanos, and everything else that’s followed, the simple things like playing Overwatch with Ned - even if he loses every time - make him so much happier than they would have before.

Peter: can’t tonight, am babysitting.

The next message from Ned comes through almost immediately.

Ned: Who tf trusted U with their kid?

Peter: ikr

Peter: pepper needed an extra hand w morgan

Ned doesn’t reply, so he assumes that the match has started and settles down onto the plush couch cushions. He scrolls through his Instagram feed, through photos posted by people from school and the odd celebrity. Until, eventually, he dozes off with his phone still in his hand.

A loud bang makes him start awake what feels like five minutes later. His phone slips out of his hand and onto the floor, the bang it creates making him startle again. He sits up blearily and stretches until his back pops. Through the windows, he can see nothing but black. His phone screen, when he picks it up to check, tells him that it’s just past nine-thirty. He hadn’t planned to sleep at all, let alone for an hour and a half.

Everything in the house still seems intact, and it doesn’t seem like Pepper is home, so he assumes that the bang was caused by the dog door, or something similar. Nevertheless, a residual anxiety forces him to his feet. He rubs the sleep from his eyes as he trudges up the stairs toward Morgan’s room.

The door is still slightly ajar, and the light from the hallway illuminates a strip of her polka dot duvet cover. He pushes the door open more, expecting to see her still tucked up tight and fast asleep.

She isn’t in her bed.

Peter’s stomach flips.

“Morgan?” he calls, hoping that she’s just hidden somewhere and will pop out giggling.

She doesn’t. He flicks the light on.

“Morgan?” He rounds the bed to check the other side, which is also empty.

She’s not hiding underneath the bed or in the wardrobe, and he checks every single room upstairs for her. But, she’s not in Pepper’s room, the guest room or the bathroom.

“Morgan!” he calls again as he races down the stairs. The downstairs bathroom is also empty, and she isn’t in the living room or the kitchen.

As he races back into the living room, his eyes lock on the front door. He can’t remember locking it behind Pepper, and he’d been woken up with a loud slam…

He throws open the front door, looking out onto the lake and the front garden, until there’s a small cough to his right.

There she is, her small form curled up on the rocking chair, thumb in her mouth and eyelids heavy with

He softens his voice to try and mask his panic. “What are you doing out here?”

“I can’t sleep,” she explains quietly. Her body seems to betray her there, though, because she lets out a yawn almost immediately.

He really doesn’t know how to get a stubborn kid to go back to sleep. He thinks back to when he was a kid, and how May would convince him to go to bed.

“You can have milk and cookies if you come back inside.”

She shakes her head.

“Juice pops?”

He remembers seeing them in the freezer earlier, and he assumes that she’ll be moved by the offer. She isn’t, and shakes her head again.

“I want to talk to daddy,” she says.

Peter’s brain takes a second too long to reboot, because she rolls her eyes and continues like he’s missed a very obvious point. “Mummy says that daddy can hear me if I sit here and talk to him.”

This is the first time this whole evening that Peter realises how much she must miss her dad. For the past few weeks, he’s felt like he’s been on autopilot, like there’s a vital part of him missing. So he can hardly imagine how she feels; she probably doesn’t even understand that he’s never coming back.

He doesn’t remember when his parents died, but he remembers asking May about them. He remembers the frown that would tug on her mouth every time he did. He remembers how much that frown would confuse him. They’re in a better place, she would say, so why would she look so sad?

He understands the questions she probably has, he understands how overwhelmed she must feel, surrounded by sadness and falseness and feelings that she doesn’t yet understand. All she needs is some normality.

“I think daddy would want you to wear a jacket outside.”

She pouts indignantly and crosses her arms to let him know she isn’t going anywhere.

Knowing now that she isn’t being moved, he grabs the hem of his sweater and tugs it over his head. The hair on his arms immediately bristles against the cold, his t-shirt doing nothing to keep him warm.

He crouches in front of the chair so that he’s level with her, sweater held between them.

“This sweater belonged to my uncle Ben. He’s in the same place as your dad, but before he went, he gave me this sweater. Do you know what he told me when he gave it to me?” She shakes her head. “He told me that it would protect me against anything, and it can protect you, too.”

He remembers Ben passing it to him while they were queueing for the Haunted Mansion at Disney World. Peter had forced him and May to queue for almost two hours, only to get too scared and start sobbing as soon as they got closer to the ride. The sweater was supposed to be a mode of persuasion for a then nine year old Peter, but it’s his most treasured item, and memory.

After Ben had died, the only thing Peter wanted to keep was the sweater, and ever since, he has worn it whenever he needs extra comfort.

He’s been wearing it a lot recently.

“Anything?” Morgan repeats, eyes wide. “Even monsters?”

He laughs, “Even monsters. Do you want to put it on?”

She nods enthusiastically, and he silently praises himself for his quick thinking as he helps her pull it over her head. It’s too big for him, so it covers almost her whole body, and the sleeves are about twice the length of her arms. She looks a lot warmer and happier, though.

She reaches out to him, and he doesn’t understand what she wants until her hands pop out of the sleeves and open and close sporadically in a move which he reads as “pick me up”.

He picks her up around her waist, her arms wrapping around his neck, and then turns to sit on the chair. She shifts around until she’s sideways on his lap, facing the lake, her head cushioned on his shoulder and her hands pulled up under her chin. The sweater cocoons her like a swaddle.

“Can you tell me a story?”

He doesn’t know any stories for kids, unless the classic, Disney movie fairy tales count.

“Do you want a story about your dad?”

She nods, the movement clear against his shoulder.

“Okay.” He wills himself not to cry immediately at the memory of his mentor, not wanting to freak the kid out or undo the hard work Pepper has undoubtedly done on making this whole situation seem lighter for her. “When I met your dad, I’d just gone through a big change…”

He recites the story of Germany, and then, when she asks for another, the stories of the boat and of Titan. They’re shortened, censored, and the latter is missing the part where he turned to dust for five years, but they’re true. Calmed by the stories, and smiling at the talk of her dad, she eventually falls asleep soundly against his shoulder. He looks down at her serene face, and he hopes that she remembers the good things about Tony, he hopes that she’s dreaming about him. He hopes that she dreams about building pillow forts with him, about him carrying her on his hip while doing important research, about him tucking her into bed and kissing her forehead.

Pepper gets home not long after Peter has tucked her back into bed.

“Was she okay?” she asks in a whisper, although the house is definitely big enough to talk at full volume and not wake the sleeping girl.

“She was a dream.”

A small, relieved sigh stirs her fringe. “Good. I really can’t thank you enough.”

“It’s honestly fine,” he says. “I had fun.”

When he unlocks and pushes open the door of the apartment, May is in her pajamas on the couch, watching some reality TV show. She looks over the back of the couch when she hears the door close, and smiles. She seems tired, as she always does after working overtime, but she’s wearing her fluffy pink socks, which means that she’s happy.

“Good night?”

He sits next to her, slowly tipping sideways until his head lands on her bent knee. Her hand automatically goes to his hair, stroking the top of it like she used to when he was small and would sit on the floor between her knees while her and Ben watched TV. Then, she moves her hand to his upper arm, and her palm feels boiling hot against his skin. “You’re freezing.”

As she tugs the throw blanket over him and pulls him closer to her side, he realises that he didn’t take his sweater back.

[rhnuzlocke]

Extra One: Jumpin’ Jack Flash

Zinnia was going to tear this incompetent twit a new asshole when she found him. How did he manage to screw up a simple task not once, but twice? As if she didn’t have enough to do, now she had to clean up this idiot’s mess.

And really, that was the least of it. She could see right where this was headed. Mr. Stone wasn’t an idiot. If the old man were only a little less perceptive, they would have had what they needed two months ago. The only sensible thing for him to do now would be to get the prototype to someone who couldn’t be compromised—his son. Once Maximus put two and two together, he’d send a squad to ambush the Giratina-damned League Champion like the arrogant dick he was. And Courtney—who Steven knew and would recognize—would lead it because no one else had the chance of a Bergmite in a volcano of overpowering him, superior numbers be damned. Maximus wouldn’t care. He was already impatient for the next phase. So he’d take the risk regardless and expose them weeks ahead of schedule. Why did she even bother planning when they’d all just chuck her hard work right out the window at the first little bump in the road? Well, it wasn’t really fair to blame them for what they couldn’t see. But she wasn’t about to explain it to them. They couldn’t be trusted. Not if they tripped over every hurdle. Zinnia didn’t even want to contemplate how they’d fall apart if they knew she was pulling the strings. She couldn’t say anything about it. She just had to nod her head yes as if she were none the wiser and let it happen. And that was why this peon was dead. He wasn’t in his room because why should anything in her life be easy? “The rec room at the end of the hall,” said Aster. Zinnia looked down at her daughter—always keen, always listening, always helpful—and just like that, half the anger melted off her. She held onto the rest for the job she still had to do. “They’re watching TV.” The Whismur hopped towards it, and Zinnia followed. The door was open and there sat three men on a couch, two watching and one sketching on a large work pad. She was in their peripheral vision, but none of them looked. Almost no one did. Zinnia had seen the artist and the one slouched on the other end together several times before, which meant they were a unit and didn’t run solo missions. That left the gangly teen in the middle. Now she understood. He was a child. Who the hell assigned him to her division in the first place? Zinnia stayed still in the doorway and watched him. He hunched over, arms resting on his knees and ass barely perched on the edge of the couch cushion. A copy of White Fang lay discarded on the coffee table, and a dull brown Poochyena went ignored at his feet as he stared intently at a news report, face tight. “Mr. Stone, owner and president of Devon Corporation, held a press conference this morning in conjunction with the Rustboro police chief, Hine Honda, reassuring anxious business owners and workers of his intention to support the repair of Rusturf Tunnel.” Even in the accompanying footage, he did indeed look kind and reassuring, far more so than the chief of police and her dour Hariyama. “The tunnel collapsed yesterday after being damaged by the combined Uproar attack of a stampede of wild Whismur and Loudred, setting the nearly completed project back for the fifth time this year alone. Thankfully, emergency responders report that no one was injured, but there is no word yet on how much longer it will take to repair the damage.” The other man rose from his slump to scoop the remote off the coffee table, and switched the channel. “You shouldn’t be watching that stuff, bro.” “You heard Terra at mess,” said the other without looking up from his drawing. “Probably would have happened anyway.” “Not your fault!” the first said with a clap on the back that made the kid jump. “The press is going to get a lot worse soon. It’s best to just ignore it.” “And don’t worry about Tabitha. I’m sure she doesn’t blame you.” “It was m-m-my fuck-up, Hart,” the kid finally responded with a pronounced stutter. “I’m p-pretty sure she b-b-blames me.” The other one elbowed the kid. “She thinks everyone is incompetent. You’re not special. That’s why she gets to boss people around while we have to do all the actual legwork.” “Th-thanks, Brent.” He sounded sincere, but not particularly heartened. “It was a shitty assignment and you had some pretty rotten luck, that’s all.” Hart slid back down again and put his feet up on the coffee table. “You were doing your job. Shit just goes south sometimes. You haven’t been a trainer that long and your Poochyena isn’t exactly a seasoned battler. Have you thought about maybe—” “Fang d-did fine! That t-trainer just pulled a d-dirty trick, having her Shroomish St-st-stun Spore me like that.” Now that part Zinnia hadn’t heard. Hardly a trick, just smart. Smart in a way most people weren’t. She rather liked the sound of this trainer. “See?” said Hart, as if that solved everything. “You just got dealt a shit hand as usual. Nothing to beat yourself up about.” “I know,” the kid mumbled. He sure was beating himself about it though. Seemed excessive to march in and chew him out now. But she had a reputation to uphold here and she didn’t know when she’d get another chance like this. Time to play her part. “JOSH!” she thundered, and Aster boosted it enough to make the furniture rattle. The kid damn near jumped out of his skin and threw an arm up to protect his face. Dragon’s teeth! But she couldn’t stop now. “How the fuck did you fail the same job twice!” This time, his stutter was so thick that nothing got past it, and the others were too stunned to move their tongues. “You had better get your fucking act together because this is the last time I clean up after you! Next time, it’ll be whoever’s on maintenance duty,” she spat, and he withered away from her glare. Then she turned on her heel and left. But she didn’t go far, just enough to make them think she was gone. “That nearly gave me a heart attack,” Hart groaned. Brent let out a big sigh, probably at the dark line he’d slashed across his drawing in fright. “I’m s-s-s-such a fuck-up,” the kid sniffled. “Naw, bro, that’s just Azalea,” Hart soothed, patting him more gently this time. “She’s always like that. She nearly bit my head off last week for nothing.” Zinnia didn’t even remember it. “Look, we all knew this wasn’t going to be easy, but it’s worth it, you know? We’ve just gotta focus on our goals, that’s what’s important. There’s gonna be some ugly press about us soon, but they’ll come back around when this is all over. People are fickle, but it’s up to us to help them out.” “Just keep working hard and things will get better,” said Brent. “They’ll get better for all of us.” “Y-you’re right.” Ah, there it was. Final question answered. He believed in it, what Maximus was trying to do. She could hear it in his voice. It wasn’t fear, but guilt, that was making the kid agonize over his failure. That was why he was in her division. That was why he was assigned the mission and would probably still be given more like it. Because it was simple and should have been easy, but should the worst have happened—should he ever be captured and questioned—he wouldn’t give them up. Because he was loyal and Maximus understood the value of it—probably held it in higher regard than she did. Zinnia stowed that away for safekeeping. More knowledge gained. One job accomplished. Now on to the next. “Yeah, don’t let that crazy bitch get to you.” That was her, even with Courtney for competition. Azalea was the crazy bitch. Zinnia had to smile. These clowns didn’t know the half of it.

[fierycosmos]

YGO 5Ds: JackxReader - Attachment

How are there still boxes? You thought to yourself. You adjusted to your new apartment three months ago and still every time you are finally sitting down to relax you spot a box from the corner of your eye. But this time you were going to ignore it. The urge to unpack everything had died a month ago. You needed to focus on what you had now, and not on the past. Also, you were worried that it would be another one of THOSE boxes. The ones that contained all the things you used to share with Jack. And though you've been able to make a living and not live off his fame as his girlfriend anymore, there were still small things that reminded you that he was in your life and a big part of it. And it's also hard when your Neo Domino News Station would talk about dueling. And Jack was a star. You hadn't talked to him since that fateful day you packed your stuff and walked out on his new stardom life. You missed the old him, where he was about dueling for saving people, for justice. The Enforcers was the best thing that ever happened to him. He was so happy and confident. Now he's just confident. To remove him from your thoughts you headed to your kitchen attached to your living room you were just lounging in and prepared a cup of cocoa. Chocolate always cheered you up. Once it was ready, you were dying to take a sip but the phone ringing interrupted your thoughts. You immediately headed towards your landline, finding it nice to finally use it. But the light wasn't blinking. You then headed back to the couch and saw your phone was buzzing along with the ringer going off. You sighed and reached out to grab it. You didn't recognize the number but decided to pick it up anyway, you had to get a new phone plan when you broke up with Jack's money as well. So it could've been someone you knew. "Hello?" "Hello, is this Miss Y/N L/N?" You didn't recognize the stern voice coming from the receiver, but he certainly knew who you were. "Yes, this is she." "Hi, I'm calling from New Domino General. We have some news." "The hospital? What's wrong?" "Mister Atlas has been through quite an accident. It says on his paperwork that you are the first to call in emergencies." Your cup of cocoa dropped and shattered to the ground. Thankfully it didn't burn you, but it's not like you would've noticed it anyway. Your hand shook as it had a death grip now on the phone. "Miss? Are you there?" "Y-Yes." You stutter as you take a deep and calming breath before continuing. "I'm still here." You cradled the phone with both her hands. "I'm on my way." You said a quick thank you and didn't bother to hear him say goodbye as you hung up and rushed towards the door with your car keys and jacket. You didn't care if you were speeding. You needed to reach Jack. The one day you wanted to go one day without thinking about him and now he needs you. You were rushing in anger and in fear of what happened. As you rushed through the lobby and right to the desk to explain why you were here, it suddenly dawned on you that you hadn't seen Jack since you left. His dark eyes flaring with tsunami fury and his hoarse voice echoed through the walls and down the hallway after her. The nurse directed her to the room Jack was being cared for in and you froze. How were you going to react, how was he going to react? You didn't know if you were going to be able to stop yourself from slapping him or even talk to him. The nurse held the door open tentatively as you weren't moving. Before she could call out to you, you got your nerve back and took a confident stride into the room. You were ready with an opening line, you were so ready. Then time froze and the duel racing blondie came into view past the curtain and you froze. Bandages partially stained red was the first thing you registered. You eyes scattered to his bandaged arms and his leg partially up in the air with a cast. The rest of the room was starch white like his sheets and the only thing that stood out was his creamy bare skin, he also had his toned torso bandaged hiding his stunning physique. Then the blonde caught your eye as the sun reflected off his shiny hair as his forehead was bandaged as well and heavy gauze was under it. Then all you saw was indigo. His eyes stared at you, and for once you couldn't read him. It's like he was a completely different person. Unrecognizable. And that threw you off. "I'm surprised you haven't yelled at me yet." Jack's voice rang through the small space of his room. You watched his mouth move, but you were still processing his current state. You cleared your throat and prayed for something to drink. "I'm not mad." You state with as much conviction as you could. "You sure about that?" He inquired. "Sometimes your silence is your strongest form of anger." "What happened?" You asked, ignoring his commentary. "What does it look like, I got into an accident." He huffed as he crossed his bandaged arms over his chest in discomfort. "Were you dueling?" You asked with more bile in your tone. "Maybe I was." Jack gave you a sideways glance. "Jack." You state as you dared to get closer to him. He turned to look at you this time, as you say his name was a shock to the both of you. "Don't give me attitude." You tried to pretend the pause meant nothing and continued without a missing beat. "Tell me what happened." He blew some air out of his nostrils and decided to be civil. "Some duel racing reject challenged me and forced himself into the arena." He went into detail about some ex-champion who got his title stolen from Jack. "He was cheating and so I knew I had to put a stop to him." "What do you mean he was cheating?" "He tampered with my wheels." Your eyes widened at the comment and you gripped your hand close to your chest. "Damage in the duel became another missing part on my bike." "That's insane!" You gasp. "It's all right." Jack said, trying to make it seem like they were having a normal conversation and not talking about his accident in the hospital. "He was kicked out and handed over the police. No big deal." "Jack." You state sternly and he stiffens slightly at your tone. "This is very much a big deal." You said sternly between your clenched teeth. "I mean just look at you." You took notice of his bandages again and felt a rush of worry and sadness overwhelm you, making you rest in a chair not far from his medical bed. "Look at you." "I can't." Jack states, almost with his full confident tone. "I've been looking at you." You blow air out of your lips making an exasperated noise. Jack sighs and continues on a different note. "Look, I don't need to see anything." "Jack!" You snap as your head shot up to glare at him. "This isn't okay. You can't do something like this again." "Since when did you start bossing me around again?" Jack challenged. "It's for your own good." You crossed your arms as you lean back slightly in the uncomfortable chair. "I think we have different ideas of what's good for me." Jack noted. "Oh I would love to hear one of your bright ideas." You retorted. "You getting me out of this hospital." He emphasized. "Do you not see the cast around your leg?" You state as you stand up and gesture to his elevated leg. "You have to get physical therapy and be given pain meds." You begin to list but stop yourself short before you lose your train of thought. "There's no way you can race tomorrow in that match." "So, you've been keeping tabs on me?" Jack inquired as he smirked slightly and raised a brow at you. "It's not very hard to when you're practically on every news channel." You state as you try to keep your heart from beating fast from seeing that infamous smirk, crossing your arms tighter over your chest. "Sometimes it's hard being me." He continues boasting. "Oh I bet." You said sarcastically. "It's even harder when your girlfriend decided to move out." Jack mentioned, changing his tone yet again. You turn your body slightly away from him. 'I was waiting for this,' you thought to yourself. "You know exactly why I left." You mention in a smaller voice, not wanting to make a commotion in the hospital by starting a shouting match with Jack. "I can't even remember the bloody fight." Jack stated as he crossed his arms and looked out the window. "It's not like it was a major game changer." You state honestly. And before he could brighten up about the small fight, you continue saying, "But it was the last straw." You say as a small fraction of your sadness trickled through your voice. It was silent in the room for a bit as you chose you didn't want to sit down anymore as you leaned against the wall instead, feeling jittery and slightly infuriated. "You made me dinner." Jack stated in a thoughtful voice. Your head turns towards him hesitantly. You see him with his arms still crossed but he was looking at his lap in concentration. "Yeah, I did." You spoke. "I can remember it now." Jack said in a far off tone. "Good for you." "I like to block it out of my head a lot." Jack admitted as he decided to change his attention back to you. "It's very distracting." You wanted to retort but you saw a far off look in his eyes that said maybe you shouldn't. "It hurts a lot thinking back to that day. It's felt like an eternity since you've been away. I remember the smell and that awful apron you were wearing covered in flour." "You remember that?" You state, almost surprised that suddenly it was hitting him. And the flashes of the events that unfolded that fateful day glided across your vision. "Of course I do." Jack states, making you stop reflecting and making eye contact with him again. You were surprised with how much sincerity and recognition flashed through his eyes as he didn't dare leave your face. "You made me that pizza we talked about having as kids. The one with the garlic knot crust" "Yeah." "I knew it was perfect as soon as I smelled it." He smiled slightly at the memory, but it vanished as something dark appeared in his mind. "Then I saw that look in your eyes, not unlike the one you're giving me." You hide your face with loose strands of hair and look away. A strong heat was definitely rising to your face and you weren't going to give him the satisfaction. "You looked lost and strained." Each word sort of sent a needle through your heart. "I was late. I had a long day putting up with Goodwin and I took it out in you. I really messed up." "It's in the past." You state quietly, trying not to get too emotional over it. You had to be strong to continue being here. But the memories flooding in brought you right back to that moment you ran down the stairs to escape Jack. "No." You looked up, forgetting that your face was giving away your true emotions no matter how strong and tough you wanted to act. "It's still here. I've played back that day through my head since you slammed the door." Jack admitted. "Probably the hardest thing I ever had to deal with. And it wasn't something I could fix with dueling." "No, not exactly." You wanted to sound sarcastic but it came out sad and pitiful. "Crow won't stop giving me hell for it." Jack admitted as he rubbed his chin, thinking about how Crow practically decked him despite their height difference when he first found out. "He probably knows a lot more about how I messed up than I do." "Oh Crow..." You put a hand to your face, just in case since you could feel tears were eventually going to fall if you didn't keep it together. The memories of the other boys, and meeting Luna and Leo, were really hard to think about since you distanced yourself a bit from them too. You were worried if you were ever around them that you would see Jack again. "He always hated us fighting. I think he preferred when he started them." You reflect. "And he loves to pick a fight with me." Jack stated with annoyance. "You know you can take him, right?" You pointed out. "I know that." Jack retorted defensively. "But there's no point in fighting him when he's right." "Right about what?" You question, completely giving up on your place on the wall and kneeling slightly near his bed. You couldn't stop yourself from moving slightly closer to him the more you two kept talking. By the time you were on eye level with him, you realized you couldn't retreat back. Your body just gave up on listening to you. "How stupid I was to let you get away." He stated honestly as he glanced slightly at you, but decided it would be better not to make eye contact with you and thus stared at your hands, currently clenching the fabric of his sheets covering half his body. "I should've chased you, throw your stuff to the ground, just to spend a few extra seconds with you." You let his words sink in, almost tempted to imagine what could've happened if he did stop you. How would that have changed the situation? Would you still be with him? Would things have been worse? Despite the dread that came with asking, you were just too scared not knowing. "Well..." You clear your throat. "I'm here now." You admit as you decide to look at him, but he still avoids your gaze slightly, but you could tell you had his full attention. "Tell me what you wanted to say." "Right now?" He asked nervously as this time he did meet your eyes, and it was painful for the both of you but you didn't break the connection. It was now or never. "Yeah." You nod. "Right now." Jack stares at you, then closes his eyes briefly to clear his head. You could tell he was deep in thought. And the small creases in between his forehead showed that he was trying to go back to that moment. After a beat, he opened his eyes and sighed deeply, then blinking again before looking at you again. "To be honest, I didn't have a full speech planned." Jack admitted as he scratched his bandaged arm in annoyance. "I just sort of wanted to stall you until finally, I said something right. Or did something right." That wasn't a good enough answer for you and so you decided to continue. "What could you have done?" "This." Without hesitation, he gently caresses your cheek and sits up to the best of his ability and pecks your lips gently. He doesn't dare to linger longer than necessary so he pulled back almost immediately. He was kind of afraid to get slapped. But you didn't. You were stiff. You were frozen in time, just staring at him as you felt your eyes glazing over with sudden sadness that resonated with how you felt all those months ago as you trudged down the hallway. Though this time there wasn't a broken feeling, there was a missed opportunity. Jack had looked away at this point and didn't bother saying anything more as he didn't want to force you into anything you didn't want. He saw something shining from the corner of his eyes and he betrayed himself as he found himself looking at you again. You were crying quietly, but you weren't shaking or wheezing. You were just stunned with so many emotions you didn't know how to deal with them. But you knew you had to do something. So you rose slightly as you leaned over him and kissed him again. There wasn't a need for force or any sense of hungry desire like sometimes it would feel when they've been a part for a while. Everything was gentle like they were experimenting with how they felt again. Seeing how far before things ended up breaking again. The two of you lingered as you didn't want to separate, just barely parting before giving a few more pecks. Then he pulled back and you looked at him, wondering if maybe he didn't feel anything. You could tell it would hurt more than last time, but right there and then you were just trying not to clench onto him with all your might. You felt as though you needed his strength and to hug him again. Your heart tightened in anticipation but he smiled gently at you, something you weren't expecting for the master of faster, and combed his fingers through your hair before gently bringing your face to his bandaged chest. And this time when you looked at the bandages you were no longer afraid; you felt that he was here and that the two of you were going to be okay. Maybe it was a good thing not all the boxes were unpacked.        

[jylener22]

Headcanon: Orihime is the primary bread winner in the family and works as a famous news anchor.

Ooohhh…I like this idea. And this is what came to mind!!! Also, I added in two of my OC’s for Ichigo and Orihime’s family: twins Reika and Ayaka. Read more about them here.

“Look out below! Aliens are coming in from the engine room! What should we do Captain?”

“Man your battle stations men! Defend the ship! Fight to the last!”

Three sets of little feet came barreling down the stairs with screams, squeals, shrieks, giggles and ‘pew-pew-pew’ laser gun sounds.

“Captain! We’ve been cut off! Where should we go now?”

“Quick! Head for the brig!”

From upstairs, a deep male voice inquired dryly, “You sure you want to head down to the ship’s dungeon, Kazui?”

“Ummm…” called the ‘captain’ back up the stairs, “Where do we want to go?”

“Try the helm.”

Looking back at his ‘subordinates’, Kazui pointed towards the kitchen and ordered, “Quick! Head for the helm!”

The seven year old boy took off with his four year old twin sisters, Reika and Ayaka, close at his heels. They continued playing and frolicking for another ten minutes or so, before their father came down the stairs with a hamper of laundry piled so high that it nearly reached his chin. Rounding the corner to head into the living room, if it had been a cartoon movie, Ichigo might have allowed the basket of dirty clothes to slip from his numb fingers and add to the mess that he had just walked into. Couch cushions had been pulled from their intended places and strewn in a rather haphazard way (at least that was what it looked like at first glance) all about the room, while a couple of afghans and even one of their everyday tablecloths were draped across and now bare couches and the coffee table and that might not have been so bad if it were for the ‘Hansel-esque’ trail of unidentifiable crumbs leading into what Ichigo could only assume was the command center/helm of his offsprings’ imaginary space craft.

“Lieutenant! Behind you! Don’t let the alien touch you with it’s anti-awake stuff!”

“Augh! Captain! Save me!”

“Wahhh! Captain, the alien caught the lieutenant! What’ll we do?!”

“Stand back and keep your nose plugged! I’m going to get her back!”

“Captain!”

Just like with his wife, Ichigo couldn’t help but grin and do his best to stifle a chuckle as his children’s antics. Honestly, it boggled his mind how they managed to come up with such elaborate games to play together when he was 98% sure they had never seen the kind of sci-fi movie or show that their story was seemingly based off of. Then again…they had to take after their mother in other ways than just her good looks.

As he was wondering just how to get their attention as it was getting close to their bedtime and unless they cleaned up this mess there was no way they were going to get through their usual bedtime ritual. Then he spotted a walkie-talkie laying nearby and got an idea. Setting down the laundry basket and turning the device on, Ichigo took a couple moments to breath deeply to try and compose himself before briefly inserting himself into the kids’ game.

Pressing the talk button, Ichigo said in a flat, officious tone, “Captain Kurosaki! Come in, Captain Kurosaki! This is the General Commander Patriarch! Over!”

Immediately all other screeching and giggling stopped and Ichigo could imagine all three of them looking at each other in surprise and then delight as they realized their father had joined in their game.

Apparently they did not wish to break from the storyline they had already established as Reika responded on the walkie, “Sorry Genner Command Party, but the captain is trying to save the lieutenant right now. Um…over.”

Squeezing the corners of his mouth between his thumb and forefinger, Ichigo then went on gravely, “I see. That is most unfortunate. Tell the captain, though, that very soon the queen will be addressing the nation and if he and his lieutenants wish to see her speech, the aliens need to be taken care of and this space ship cleaned up good and proper or it will make the queen very sad. Over.”

There were a few moments of silence and Ichigo was just beginning to wonder if maybe his kids’ were a bit too young for those kind of vague directions when suddenly the screaming and squealing commenced again, only this time it was followed by a kind of explosion of the blankets covering Kazui, Reika and Ayaka as they all raced around trying to put the room back together as best they could. Kazui did fine on his own folding the afghans and tablecloth, but Ichigo took pity on Reika and Ayaka, helping them to pick up and arrange the pillow cushions again as most of them were at least half as big as the four-year-olds.

With the floor cleared, Ichigo could see a package of some kind of chips they had apparently shared, which seemed to be the source of the crumbs. Before he could even say a word, Kazui snatched up the bag to throw in the garbage while Reika and Ayaka knelt down to pick up as many of the pieces as they could with their little fingers.

Heart melting instantly at their sincere and desperate attempts to be helpful, Ichigo wrapped his left hand around both of Ayaka’s then Reika’s with his right as he said, “Don’t worry, Aya-chan, Rei-chan. Daddy will take care of this while you and your brother head upstairs and get changed.”

As twins are sometimes wont to do, Reika and Ayaka looked at each other then in perfect unison straightened up, gave their father a big smile and leaned over to give each his cheeks a big kiss. It wasn’t until he let their hands go (which he purposefully didn’t do for at least four seconds) that the girls leaned away with a big ‘Muah!’ sound and raced out of the room and up the stairs to get their pajamas on so that they could see ‘the queen’s address to the nation’. Unable to control the pleased flush of his cheeks or the rather dopey grin on his face, Ichigo quickly headed to the closet to pull out the vacuum to dispatch of the pesky crumbs.

Less than five minutes later, the whole Kurosaki clan, minus the ‘queen mother’, were comfortably ensconced on the couch before the television while the ‘general commander patriarch’ adeptly turned on the set and swiftly selected the channel they were all anxious to watch. They had to sit through a couple of tedious commercials before the show began and even then it took a few minutes before the camera moved away from the head newsman who was announcing the various stories that would be covered during that particular news hour to the woman Ichigo, Kazui, Ayaka and Reika all wished to see. As per usual, their waiting was rewarded quite spectacularly.

Tonight, Orihime was wearing a particularly flattering ruffled blouse with an onyx brooch fastened at the neck, while over top she had on an emerald colored suit coat. Her hair was loosely twisted and pinned so that the low hanging ponytail hung over her right shoulder, while her make-up was only minimally done so that her natural beauty shone through. To make her eyes pop, however, there was the faintest trace of green and black make-up on her top eyelids, seemingly to match her outfit.

The first half hour of the news always covered topics that both Ichigo and Orihime felt their children could handle: an animal shelter throwing an event to help promote adoptions, a new restaurant sending one of their chefs into the studio to demonstrate how to make one of their not-quite-so-signature dishes, a successful sports team/player or exceptional students excelling in their particular field and so on. Once all the ‘feel good news’ was out of the way, Orihime would secretly signal to her children and her husband that it was time to head upstairs.

On this particular evening, Orihime and her co-anchor had been interviewing a young gymnast who was well on their way to qualifying for the following years Olympic Games but had had to do some intensive training after they were diagnosed with a malignant tumor that was successfully removed and Orihime wrapped the segment up by laying a hand over her heart and saying sincerely, “I’m sure your mother is so proud of how far you have come after such a scary diagnosis. The best of luck to you both in the next few months.”

The camera pulled back to show a wide-shot of both anchors and while the man began introducing the next topics that would be discussed after the commercial break, Orihime looked into the camera and smiled before giving her children the signal that said ‘I love you all and I’ll see you in the morning’. She placed her index finger next to her eye and tapped it slowly and deliberately one, two, three times.

Wrapping his arms around the small bodies surrounding him, Ichigo said, “Okay all. Brushed teeth and under covers in five. Go!”

While most kids would get even more wound up by the directive to hurry and borderline refuse to settle down when it was time, the Kurosaki children had no such issues. They could be wild and crazy one minute and then calm and docile the next, especially at bedtime. Kazui, Ayaka and Reika were by no means ‘perfect children’, but they came pretty darn close in Ichigo’s estimation.

After taking the time to tuck them all in, kiss them affectionately on the forehead and wish them pleasant dreams, Ichigo headed back downstairs to attend to the previously forgotten laundry before settling back down in front of the tv to finish watching his wife with his heart swelling with pride every time he saw her smiling at the screen and listening to her compassionate voice talk about the more difficult topics the news had to cover.

Unbeknownst to the kids, Ichigo also had his own special signal that Orihime would give him at the end of her news hour. In all the time they had been married and she had started working in front of the camera, he had not missed a single broadcast. Honestly, he wasn’t sure which part he loved more about the whole thing: the fact that Orihime cared enough to think of a way to deliberately show him how much she loved him every night in front of an entire studio as well as viewing audience, or the fact that while he needed to be comfortable with his wife being so much in the public eye, open to all their criticism and overblown affection alike, there were parts of herself that Orihime reserved just for him and their kids.

Ichigo snapped out of his reverie in just enough time to catch the signal: a subtle hand over her heart, while she brushed the tips of two fingers along her lips. Unable to contain his smile, Ichigo returned the gesture regardless of the fact that his wife obviously could not see it. However, for some reason, Ichigo thought she knew as almost immediately after he did it, Orihime’s smile would become just a little bit brighter.

Switching off the tv as it went to commercials, Ichigo leaned his head back and closed his eyes, listening to the various sounds throughout the house. If he listened hard enough, he could hear the soft breathing of his kids upstairs and the constant ‘tick-tick-tick’ of the clock in the master bedroom along with the other typical sounds that could be heard when all was still in the house.

As per usual, Ichigo dozed off for a couple of hours on the couch, but immediately became alert when he sensed a familiar, warm presence hovering over him. Opening his eyes slowly, the smiling face of his queen came slowly into focus. What a perfect sight to wake up to, if he did say so himself, even if she was upside down at the moment.

“I’m back,” said Orihime as she reached down to stroke her fingertips along his lips.

Reaching up to take hold of her hand, Ichigo responded with, “Welcome home.”

Shaking her head in gentle admonition, Orihime said, “Honestly, Ichigo. Why don’t you head up to bed? You’ll put such a kink in your neck sleeping like this.”

Chuckling and shaking his head in response, Ichigo replied, “Don’t wanna. Can’t sleep up there by myself. It’s too cold.”

“Oh, you…what am I going to do with you?”

Grinning cheekily, Ichigo’s answer was to cup a hand around the back of her head and carefully pull her down so that he could officially welcome his wife home.

When he finally released her, Ichigo stretched and groaned as he said, “I’ve gotta move the laundry into the dryer before it starts to smell. You head upstairs and get comfortable, all right?”

“Okay,” said Orihime and she started to walk away before she turned back around and said, “Would you rather I wear something comfy so we can snuggle or…something else?”

Inhaling deeply, Ichigo shrugged his shoulders and said, “Surprise me.”

Before she went up the stairs, Orihime gave him another smile that gave him absolutely no indication as to what he would find when he did come up. That was just fine with him. He would be the predictable one in the family who enjoyed allowing the others to surprise him with their spontaneity, while they could always come to him when they needed something firm and steady to hold them together.

[snowwritesall]

Writing update #2 Anathema + new WIP!

Hi folks, hope y'all have been doing well and staying healthy - I've had a pretty trying week and my financial situation is gonna be tight at best for the next few months but I'm still trying to maintain a positive outlook. With that being said, I'm gonna give you guys some updates and excerpts on my current WIP, Anathema, and a new novel that I started the other day (yes I'm well aware I have way too many wips but I'm dumb and listen to no one's advice :)

Anyway, that being said, onto the updates!

Anathema is my surreal sci fi novel that I came up with last year and has spent many months under development. A brief summary on the novel for you!

The tea on my novel: 

I absolutely love the concept of my novel - keeping in mind that there is a lot of the plot hidden because I don’t want to spoil the entire book - however, there are a lot of things that need work. Seraph - my main character - still feels a little flimsy and underdeveloped - as well as my side characters, who have had limited interactions with Seraph throughout the novel as far - mainly due to the reason that I’ve been focusing on narrative rather than characters. The next thing that I’m finding is a problem is that there’s barely any dialogue between what character interaction I do have. I’ve been focusing a lot on the vibe and feeling of my book - I really want to create an eerie, almost alien feel, without being fully horroresque - think Coraline x Limbo. 

The things that I do like about my novel: 

- I really love the literary devices that I’ve come up with to help give the story that eerie vibe I want. 

a) Really weird rhetorical questions

b) interjections of two unknown characters that comment on Seraph and his friends when they’re together

c) POV of animals and inanimate objects 

Here are some examples of both: 

a)  Really weird rhetorical questions

The wind seems strangely muted to Seraph, as if moving through a half-awake dream, or sinking in murky water that chills the bones.

Why does the water hurt? This is only one of the questions hurtling through his mind, but there are many more barrelling inside his head; a turbulent chamber of thoughts and unspoken quandaries that crescendo in the night hour. He is curious. And that - that, is what will save him.  

ai)

The beetles crawl up the blackened bark, wings glistening from between the cracks. They make soft, chittering noises as they climb aimlessly up the branch. Their path is strangely linear, their wings a malachite soaked fluorescent in the bitter, fuse sharp breeze. If they were to travel down the length of Seraph's spine; their strange, crackled wings fluttering against his ashen, ghostly skin; they would calm him as they walked up the shallow curve of his spine and nestled in his hair, a dim saucer of moonlight that they would bathe in.

Is the moon ever lonely?

b)   Interjections of two unknown characters that comment on Seraph and his friends when they’re together

“What was it like?”

His voice shakes as he asks, still staring at his hands. Wilbur is teething his lip, his jaw hardening like clay left in the sun.

  “Were there others? Are we the only ones left?”

Are we the only ones left?

They both look scared, don’t they?

     No. Not scared. Doomed.

Why are they doomed?

      Because they were never meant to be here.

Wilbur continues to stare out at the forest, and after a moment takes a few steps forward, shoveling his feet into the soil; the wind rifling through his clothes. He looks like a scarecrow made of marble, distant, ghostly - not real.

  Were any of them real?

c) POV’s of animals 

Seraph had stroked the snake gently, the scales cold and undulating under his fingers, the snake mothers eyes dark and pupils, her nose nudging the wings of the fledglings.

“Don’t eat your babies, mother snake. They love you. Don’t leave them.”

I have found my new children. My own children were buried in a sandstorm, and I milked my venom from my teeth on the carcass of a deer. There was no one to sing them to sleep as they died. I will listen to this strange boy. I will take care of my children.

I will not leave them.

ci) 

The forest is very cold for us. Even we, with our wings like a shield and a fur coat, even we feel the wind. The bark splinters are like earthquakes under our feet, even though there have been no earthquakes for centuries. We remember. We remember when the earth shook and trembled, and when we would seek shelter amongst the splintering trees and scuttle for cover under broken fern leaves. He comes to see us. The boy with curious eyes that glint like the rock in the sky, his hands are as pale as the eggs the birds lay. He brushes his fingers across our coats, and we shiver; with a strange fear and an even stranger contentment. We are not alone.

 He is not alone. 

Here are some excerpts from the novel that I really like: 

- POV of the boy that drowned in the lake. Seraph remembers this when he looks at the jars of butterflies that he keeps on his windowsill. The clear, glossy surface reminds him of how the lake looked when he watched some of the village men pull the boy’s body out of the lake. 

- Seraph is remembering the first time that one of the children stuck their head in the guillotine in the schoolyard. He remembers thinking how odd it was that they would have something so dangerous where children could find it. Maybe they wanted them to use it. 

Seraph is watching his school teacher polish the guillotine blade through the cover of pine trees. One of his friends, Beluah, creeps up behind him and startles him. They both watch the teacher and talk. 

More commentary of Seraph and Beluah watching the teacher together: 

Okay, that’s all on this novel for now, onto the new WIP! 

Basically, this idea arose from two things - I felt like I was constantly writing in the same sort of style - ie, cold rivers, frost, rain, foggy forests - and I was majorly inspired by Fairytales for Wilde Girls by Alysse Near. This woman has an absolutely INCREDIBLE writing style - I would compare it to the bright and shiny treasures that magpies collect, and her plot and characters are amazing; so a big part of why I’m writing this is because of her. 

The characters appeared really easily to me, and after only a few minutes, I already could feel them writhing around alive inside my mind. But, before I tell you about the characters, a summary of the novel for you! 

When three dead girls show up at school with flowers where their eyes should be and birds living in their chests, Ariel isn’t sure what to think. She’s never really been sure what to think, since her mother sells beads and homemade jewelry for a living and her sister is a snake. Well, two snakes, really. Her parents keep strange things in the closet, like elephants with jellyfish swimming in their stomachs and siamese twins with leopard skins in the attic. And then there’s that strange girl that lives in the mirror.

When three dead girls demand to be brought back to life, you start to panic a little when you realise the closest things you’ve made come alive are the ragdolls in your toy chest.

It gets even worse when they tell you you only have a month or they’ll take you back to the underworld with them. Then you really begin to freak out. And begin to have a mental break down in the middle of class which involves involuntary tap dancing (Except the tap dancing is actually crying. Ariel doesn’t own tap dancing shoes. Not even doll tap dancing shoes.)

It doesn’t help when your best friends are literally ragdolls. She actually has a few real friends. I promise.

Now onto my babies/kids/characters! 

Ariel Hakens: 

has a big giant ball of curly red hair that she likes to dye a new colour every week. She likes glitter but also loves black. Big boots and shiny raincoats are a thing. She love to collec. She loves to garden, but her methods are...unorthodox, shall we say. Loves Edgar Allen Poe, and recites it to herself on the way to school. Does she ditch a lot? Maybe. Who knows. Can apparently see the dead and do weird stuff nobody should be able to. Favourite animals are mice and rats. Is fascinated with the legend of the pied piper. Is like a beaver in the fact that she chews pencils. They’re basically like a midnight snack for her. Favourite foods are peanut butter and cherry tarts.

(yes I am fully aware this is Leigh-Anne Pinnock from Little Mix, but this is what she looks like in my head) 

Gwendolyn Spires: 

She is as extra as the name sounds. She dreams of participating in an illegal dance competition in an abandoned subway tunnel. Her mother is the principal of a ballet boarding school, and highly disapproves of her daughter's skateboarding fetish. Her father is completely on board with it, and also her addiction to gumballs and love for all things haunted. Yes, those spell books are completely real. The amount of salt rocks she keeps in her bag would put a shaman to shame. African American. 

Indie Brooks:

 She’s basically a giant nerd, but covered with tattoos. And piercings. She actually needs those glasses, and she refuses to put in contacts for fear that the government will be able to read her mind. She has a conspiracy theory Youtube Channel, but her theories are really??weird??

Think: we are all giant animals living in a zoo for aliens

Does she have evidence: Yes. Is it sketchy evidence? Also yes.

May or may not have broken into area 51.

Native American/Latina.

Callum Prikhill:

pervy, but not in a sexual way. Will he sell you exam answers in exchange for candy? Possibly. Ironically wears caps. Unironically wears light up shoes. Likes sci-fi movies from the early 70’s. Skinny dipped and LOVED it. Is a theater boy. If he were an animal he would be a lizard. His mother is a low-end movie producer and his father is an accountant. Often stays at his nan’s place a lot because she has a hidden bunker under the house and he very much down for that. Because the acoustics are amazing.

The first time Ariel saw the three dead girls sway through the doors of Helkbud Senior Preparatory School, she was whistling Sissyneck while flipping through her collection of rained on vinyls that she’d chanced to pick up from the thrift store, her tanned dewy legs slick with snow and hail as she pushed hot pink cat eye sunglasses up her freckled nose.

They looked like nesting dolls all jumbled up in a lolly bag, corpse candy sucked dry of their colour and watermelon blush that should have twisted their cheeks into marionette smiles.

The girl in the middle wore poppy red heels that spun and shone like a disco ball at a teenage party where the parents were gone for the weekend and everyone was drinking punch mixed with vodka in cheap, crinkly red cups; and was the shortest of the three; yellow daisies and white crocuses growing out of her eye sockets, petals drinking salty tears out of a chipped watering can that dangled over her head.

Hope you enjoyed hearing about my WIPs, and I’ll keep updating about them as I continue to work on them :)

That’s all for now, folks! 

- Bella. 

[go-diane-winchester]

I had a dream 5 years ago, when I had no issues with Misha.  Too bad his stupid ass destiel fans wont allow something like this to happen.  Neither would he, because who is going to troll his dumb fans if he is busy contributing to the SPN canon.

There are some parts of this dream that I forgot.  There are some that don't make sense, but duh! its a dream.  I am writing it like a story so its wont be boring.  I am going to embellish harmless bits and pieces here and there, so its not bland.  

My dream starts in a motel room.  The old kind from the pre-bunker era.  I miss the motel rooms.  Sam is channel surfing, with a remote in his hand whilst reclining in an arm chair, and Dean is lying on his bed, reading a magazine.  I am very surprised because I seldom see fuddy duddy Sam actually watching TV.  He is usually squinting at a lap top screen.  They look seriously chilled out and I am happy about that.  There is a knock on the door. 

Dean:  [hollering] We don't need anything, thanks.

Cas:  Its me, Dean.  Open the door.

Dean and Sam look at each other surprised.  I was surprised too.  Why isn't he flying in uninvited, like he usually does?  Sam opens the door and finds a very busted up Cas.  He is missing his trench coat, his suit jacket and shoes.  He has a swollen eye, bust lip and blood running down one nostril. 

The brothers help him into the room and make him sit.  Sam runs for a glass of water.  It is only when I woke up and relayed this story to my cousin gleefully, that I realized that Sam wouldn't need to give an angel water.  But its a dream so just go with it.  Dean is assuming, as I am, that a monster attacked Cas.

Dean:  What did this to you?

Cas:  Youth.  Around 15 years old. 

Dean and Sam stare and him and then at each other. 

Sam:  Children beat you up? 

Cas:  Yes, and stole my possessions. 

Sam:  Kids beat you up and stole your stuff...how did they manage to do that?  And why didn't you stop them?

Cas:  There were five of them.  And they had bicycles.  But the time I got up of the ground, they were gone.  They pedaled very fast...  I lost my grace. 

Dean:  Again?  Dude you are clumsiest angel in the garrison.  Why don't you sew it to the inside of your underwear so you won’t lose it. 

Sam:  How did you lose your grace?

Cas:  It’s a long story and not important right now.  I need your help. 

Sam:  Sure man.  What do you need? 

Cas:  Some people are trying to resurrect an ancient demon.  They made it their god.  Humans cant fight this thing.  Only warrior angels can put it to sleep...using their grace.  We did it before. 

Dean:  But you don't have your grace.  Why don't you ask one of your brothers to do the job. 

Cas:  Because, they hate me.  None of my brothers wants to talk to me.  I betrayed them, remember?  They said that the next time they seem me, they will kill me.  Only the cherubs are on talking terms with me.  I hitched a ride with one of them to get here.  The cherubs are weak.  They cant fight, otherwise I would have given the job to them. 

Dean:  So you have a monster that we can't kill.  You can’t either.  Your brothers don't want to see your face.  So what kind of help can we give you?

Cas:  You have to teach me how to procreate. 

Dean and Sam:  HUH!

Cas:  I am still an angel.  I have power.  It’s this power that is making this vessel move.  My energy source is switched off. 

Dean:  Like a battery pack?

Cas:  Yes, like a battery pack.  So I need a new one. 

Dean [grinning]:  And sex does that for you?  [Sam puts on his bitchface]

Cas:  No, but a child will.  My child will have my grace.  I can harness it to put this creature to sleep.

Sam: [disapprovingly] And what about the kid after that.

Cas:  There are plenty of single mothers in the world.  I know this sounds manipulative.  But this half angel child will be strong and won’t need me.  But right now, the world needs it.  Will you help me?

Dean: [horrified] You want the birds and the bees talk?  Oh, please say no.

Sam:  I'm going to get pizza.  You go ahead, Dean.

Sam rushes out of the room, living a pissed off Dean to glare at his retreating form. 

Cas:  I am not stupid.  I know how everything works.  [Dean sighs with relieve]  I need to know how to get a female to procreate with me. 

Dean blinks at him, and eventually smiles a mischievous smile. 

Dean:  Oh, that part's easy.  Just ask very politely ''Excuse me, mam.  Would you like to make a baby with me?''  If she says yes, good.  If not, keep asking every female you meet.  One is bound to say yes.

I remember thinking 'Dean, you rascal!'. 

Cas [squinting his eyes at Dean]: That works? 

Dean:  Oh sure.  Just get cleaned up first. 

Dean dresses Cas in white Bermuda shorts, a loud red and parrot Hawaiian shirt and a white fedora adorned with an oversized feather.  If this was an actual episode, there would be a reason he would have those items of clothing, but since it’s my dream, I got nuthin'.  I remember feeling mortified but Dean looks red because he is trying so hard not to laugh. 

Cas steps outside and Dean wishes him good luck.  As Cas is walking down the corridor, one of the doors open, and a lady steps out of her room, wearing a beige peignoir set.  She lights a cigarette.  Cas walks up to her, smiling. 

Cas:  Good evening, Mam.  You are looking very lovely.  Would you like to make a baby with me?

I remember feeling second hand embarrassment.  The lady looks at Cas's grinning face, with wide shocked eyes.  Who could blame her?  Then she shrugs.

The lady:  Sure!

She escorts him into her room. 

We cut back to Sam hitting Dean with a rolled up magazine.  Dean is laughing despite the abuse. 

Dean:  If you want things done right, do them yourself.  Nobody told you to leave me on the lurch. 

Sam:  What if someone beats him up, you jerk? 

Cas:  That never happened.  It went well.  Thanks Dean. 

Sam:  You just appeared.  You have power! 

Cas:  Yes, I can fly now and I repaired my vessel.

Sam:  What did you do?

Cas:  I did exactly was Dean told me to do.  I, very politely, asked a lady if she would like to make a baby with me.  She said yes. 

Sam:  It worked? 

Cas:  As you can see, yes it did. 

Sam and Dean stare at each other slack jawed. 

Sam:  I guess, some women are just desperate to become mothers. 

Dean nods sagely at him. 

Some time goes by.  The brothers are in another motel sitting at the dining table and Cas appears, dressed in his trench coat.  Don’t ask where it came from. 

Cas:  I need your help.  My child is in danger.

Sam and Dean are shocked.

Sam:  What happened?

Cas:  I don't know.  But he is in an enclosed place.  He can’t get out.  And he's scared. 

Sam and Dean look at each other, trying to hide their smiles.

Sam:  That enclosed place is his mother's womb.  It’s only been a month.  He is going to be in that enclosed place for a long time.  Then he will be born.  Don't worry.

Cas:  That is how it works for humans.  This child is half angel.  Things are different with us.

Dean:  Are you sure?

Cas:  I can sense him.  He communicates with me.  I know he is in danger.  Please.  I need your help. 

Sam:  Sure Cas.  What do you want us to do?

Cas:  When I fly, I lose touch with him.  If I am riding in your car, it will be slower and I will be able to locate him. 

Dean:  That's it?  Fine.  Lets go. 

Baby pulls up next to a cave mouth, in the desert.  The guys go into the cave.  Cas goes to the back of the cave and points at the ground.

Cas:  He's here. 

Dean and Sam are suddenly very serious.  The boys get shovels and start digging, as Cas stands to the side, staring earnestly at them.  Suddenly, Sam drops his shovel and walks away.  Dean follows him.

Dean:  Sam? What’s wrong?

Sam:  Dean, I’m freaking out.

Dean:  Sammy, calm down.  Tell me why you’re freaking out. 

Sam:  Dean, do you realize what we are doing?  We are digging up a baby’s grave.  I have never seen a dead baby before. 

Dean [realization on his face]  I haven’t either.  Oh shit….You know what.  I’ll handle it.  Don’t worry.  Sit this one out.

Sam:  Dean, I’m sorry.

Dean:  Sammy, it’s ok.  Don’t feel guilty.  Stay here.  I will tell you to come closer if I’m sure that whatever we dig up won’t damage you more than you already are. 

Dean goes back, and flings Sam’s shovel into Cas’s hand.  They start digging.  Finally, one of the shovel hits something.  The hole was damn deep and Dean immediately scrambles out of the grave and runs to Sam’s side.  Whatever needs to be seen, let Cas see it.  Dean cant stomach the thought of seeing a dead baby.  Sam looks away and Dean stares gingerly as Cas climbs out of the grave and pulls out a big pine box, with sigils etched into it.  There is a large chain around the box, with a huge lpadlock fastened.  Cas breaks the chain and padlock with his bare hands, and flips the lid open.  He stoops and pulls out a kid of about a year and half, with long shaggy brown hair.  Dean [and Sam too apparently] go close to take a look. The kid looks fast asleep.   

Dean:  Is he….?

Cas:  He’s fine.  Let’s get him out of here.

They are relieved but when they turn to leave, they freeze.  There is someone standing at the entrance.  Dean and Sam pull out their guns.

Dean:  Who are you?  What do you want?

The mysterious person steps forward.  It’s Meg.

Meg:  Well, I wanted to stop you, but obviously I am late. 

Dean:  Stop us from doing what?

Meg:  Digging up the box, you idiot.  I went through all the effort of making the box as protective as possible and burying it as deep as possible, but if anyone can go looking for unnecessary trouble, it’s you three jinxes. 

Cas looks at her disappointed. 

Cas:  Oh no. 

Meg:  Oh yes. 

Cas:  How could you be so stupid?

Meg:  Because I loved you.  And the curiosity was killing me.  And I was trying to be helpful.  What, with your broken battery pack and all.  If I were you, just bury him before he wakes up.  I am petrified of him.  Let that clue you in on how dangerous he can be. 

She disappears.  Dean looks at Cas confused.  Then realization hits him.

Dean:  That is why that dumb pick-up line worked.  The woman was possessed by Meg. 

Sam:  What do we do now? 

Dean:  Bury it.

Sam:  What!?

Dean:  You heard her.  Bury it before it wakes up. 

Cas:  There has to be another way.

Dean:  Another way?  Like what?  How are angel-demon hybrids usually dealt with. 

Sam [after realizing Cas doesn’t have an answer]:  Cas, is this kid the first of his kind?

Cas:  Yes.

Sam:  Oh shit. 

Dean:  You have to kill it. 

Sam:  Dean!

Dean:  Sam I know this sounds cruel.  But nobody on earth has dealt with this type of creature before.  Meg is afraid of it.  What if this thing wakes up –

Cas:  Then I will deal with it. 

Dean:  Cas don’t be stupid. 

Cas:  Put yourself in my shoes. 

Dean:  This is not right.  This creature could kill you. 

Sam [To Cas, pointedly]:  Its ok , Cas.  I understand. 

Dean [To Sam]:  Do you?

Sam:  Yes!  You don’t have to like it Dean.  I can understand your concerns.  But it’s his kid.  Have a heart. 

Dean:  Screw the two of you.  I am not going to clean up this mess.  This is all on you two.  I want no part of this. 

And then Dean disappears.  No, that was not a special plot point.  That was my dream growing crazy stupid.  Suddenly there is a four poster brass bed in the cave.  Cas lays the little boy on the bed and lays down next to him.  Sam stands over them.

Sam:  He’s freaked out.  That’s why he’s behaving like that.  But don’t worry Cas.  I will stand by your side.  I will support you. 

Cas: [with a weak smile] That’s mean a lot to me, right now. 

And then Sam disappears.  And then my dream must have shifted to something else or my sleep just broke.  I don’t remember. 

The End

[semiwriting]

Grizzly Bears

On Wattpad

There’s a storm coming. That’s what the news said. I hopped off the couch and went through the screen door onto the porch. It was pretty sunny right now, not that hot, but I didn’t want the bother of the sunlight in my eyes anyway. “Daddy! A storm’s coming!” I yelled out to the field where Daddy was pulling weeds out from crops. He stood up to look at me. “How long?” He yelled back. “They say it’s going to be five days this time!” I retreated back into the house after seeing him nod and turn back to the ground. I heard Todd talking to Mama loudly and saw Russ hop onto the couch with a popsicle. He had slightly lighter brown hair than Daddy, unlike me who had more blonde-ish hair like Mama. Todd...didn’t really have much hair yet. I didn’t know if that was normal for babies. “Did Mama say you could have that?”

“Yes,” Russ swung his legs absentmindedly and reached for the remote to change the channel to a cartoon with bland and flat colors. Mama came into the living room and put her hand on her hip. “Did you tell your daddy about the storm coming?” “Yes, Mama, didn’t you hear me yelling?” “Okay, okay.” Daddy came back inside, the screen door slamming back and creaking as it moved. He pulled off his gloves and stuffed them into a pocket in his overalls; he rolled up the sleeves of his sweatshirt and walked over to Mama, kissing her. “We should go to Lee’s house for the storm,” he said to the side, not really at anybody but also to all of us. “Is it just rain, or is there noise with it?” “The TV said just rain, but a lot of it,” Mama said. She leaned her shoulder against the wall and crossed her arms over the floral print of her dress. “Always is, isn’t it?” He circled back around in his spot, keeping a hand on the base of Mama’s back. “You kids pack, alright. A week’s worth, just in case,” Mama told us. There were a few mumbled yeses from us; Russ ran up the stairs excitedly having already finished his popsicle, and I grabbed Todd’s hand and led him up the stairs. We packed our little suitcases, with me helping the boys pack since Todd was too young to know how to fold clothes and Russ would just throw his toys into his bag. “Rita, can you tuck me in?” Russ looked up at me from his bed later that night. “You know, you’re going to be too old to be tucked in soon,” I smiled at him. But I complied anyway, bringing the blankets up to his chin and flattening out the space around him. “Goodnight,” I said to him as I left the room, leaving the door slightly open so the hallway light would comfort him enough until he slept. I went back downstairs, Mama and Daddy now out of their day clothes. Mama was in the kitchen, washing the dishes, and Daddy was hugging her from behind, probably kissing her neck or something. Daddy always doted on Mama like that; he says he’s been in love with her since their schooling days and their fire’s never gone out, whatever that means. I’ve never known love so I guess I wouldn’t know. I started tidying up the living room from the mild chaos that came with Todd and Russ whenever playtime hits. Mama thanked me from the kitchen and asked if I had enough to eat for dinner. “Yes Mama,” I answered her. “When are we going to Lee’s house?” Lee was Mama’s brother. We stayed with him whenever storms come because he had a cellar and we didn’t. Lee’s family were my cousins; we would see Laney and Danny and their mama Gracie. “We’ll leave in two. It’s three days until the storm comes, we don’t want to stay at Lee’s for longer than we have to.” “And we can’t stay too long, anyway, the crops need an eye,” Daddy input with a smile. He came over and squeezed my shoulders together, giving me a kiss on the forehead. “You should go to sleep soon, babygirl.” I smiled to myself. I was excited to go to Lee’s house. We don’t see him often and only go to his house when it’s a five-day storm or more. We usually let the rain irrigate the crops by itself. Especially for noise storms, it could be dangerous if you don’t have a cellar. On Tuesday, we took the drive to Angola; it’s where Lee lives. It was about three hours away. And since the days before storms are unbearably hot, we were allowed to have the windows down. I leaned against the frame of the open window, watching the barren land barely even spotted with skinny trees go by. There were tufts of grass by the road. I imagined the last of the surviving animals lived in those small tufts or the remaining leaves of the trees. Maybe they all turned small and minuscule when the world turned hot. There couldn’t have been that many that died. But Daddy told me when when he was in schooling, he learned that when all the grasses started dying, it hurt a lot of species, and they died too. I saw a small type of rabbit bounce around and stop and look at our car. He sniffed the air and then flew out of sight when our car went by. I looked back inside the car. Russ was sitting in the middle, drawing something that looked like a dragon mixed with a lion. He was always a pretty good drawer; Mama likes to hang his drawings in his room or around the house and stuff. Says it really livens up the place. Todd was sitting at the other end than me, asleep in his car seat. I don’t know how anyone could sleep when they’re sweating this much, but Todd could sleep anywhere. There was one time we were at the grocery store and Russ was trying to convince Daddy to buy some cereal or candy, so I was standing with Mama and Todd for a while. Todd was holding Mama’s hand and ended up nodding off to sleep standing up in the store. “Daddy?” “Yes, babygirl?” “When do I get to go back to schooling and learn about all those animals that died?” He chuckled. “That’s not all you learn in school, you know. But your Mama and I think you can go back this year. With Russ, too.” “I missed a year, though. Is that okay?” “Yes, it’s fine, babygirl.” I got taken out of schooling after my first year of high school because Mama and Daddy said that they didn’t have enough money for another year. So on my year off, I helped them with the farming and selling the crops that Daddy planted. I got to go to town and talk to the locals a lot. Sometimes Mama would come with me, carrying Todd, and walk around town for a little bit. I would stand with baskets of food, selling them to people, and she would talk with the other mamas and their little babies. I don’t know what they would talk about, but sometimes when we got home she would get really sad and hug us a lot. I didn’t like seeing her sad, but I didn’t ever know what to do. And when Daddy got home from the field or the labor work, he would dote on her extra that night and they would watch a movie. I was shaken out of my thoughts when the car suddenly slowed down and pulled up next to a house. Three hours had passed and we were at Lee’s house. He was already coming outside of his house when we pulled up. “Miss Maybelle!” Lee walked up to the car with his arms open. “Mister Leevi!” Mama got out of the car and hugged her brother tightly. I helped the boys get out of the car, and Daddy went to hug Lee as well. “Rita! You grow every time I see you!” Lee smiled widely at me. “Hi, Uncle Lee.” “That’s Lee, to you,” he scooped me up into a hug. “Uncle makes me feel like an old man.” He turned to Russ and Todd and squatted to be at a more equal standing to the two. Russ jumped into his arms with a giddy smile, and Todd tried to run to him but ended up falling flat on his face in the dirt. Daddy helped him up and pulled a tissue out of his pocket to wipe the dirt off his face. Todd wasn’t that discouraged and wobbled over to Lee; for a one year old, he doesn’t cry that much. “You have to face your age sooner or later,” Mama said to him. “You trying to pick a fight, Miss Belle?” He stood with Todd in his arms. “My kids are the same age as yours.” We all traveled inside, beginning to socialize with Aunt Gracie. She was a petite woman, more so than Mama, but somehow Danny was taller than both Aunt Gracie and Lee. Him and Laney came in, smiling despite the occasion. Danny hugged me first. He was seventeen, only two years older than me. Laney was five, the same age as Russ, but was going to turn six in a couple months. “How you been, Rita? Last time you came for a storm was three or so months ago.” He lingered a bit longer than usual when hugging me and kept his arm around me. “Yeah, it’s too bad we only visit during the bad ones.” “But this one’s not supposed to bring any noise, right?” Mama stepped into the conversation. “There was an update, actually. Apparently it’s noise and all,” Lee said, pushing Laney lightly on the back to come say hi to us. Mama bent down to hug Laney and complimented her little dress, making her smile and giggle. “Y’all had a long drive, I’m sure you’re all hungry,” Aunt Gracie smiled to all of us. I disconnected from Danny to reach for the plate of brownies Aunt Gracie set on the table. I gave one to Russ who ripped his in half and took a bite out of one of the halves. “Honey, give some of that to Todd,” Mama picked up Todd who was grabbing out with his little hand to the plate. In response, Russ yelled ‘no’ and shoved one of the halves in his mouth. “Russel!” “Don’t worry, Belle, there’s plenty to go around,” Aunt Gracie giggled. “Hey, city boy? Why don’t I help you bring the bags and stuff down to the cellar?” Lee has been making fun of Daddy since they were teenagers, Mama always said. He didn’t have an accent like the rest of us; he moved out of the city when he was in high school. That’s when he met Mama. “Yeah, sure,” Daddy grinned, heading out to the car with Lee. “Hey, can I show you something?” Danny touched my arm. I looked over to Mama still holding Todd. Her and Aunt Gracie were chatting about something as Russ and Laney ripped up some brownies over a paper plate. Todd was nibbling on a small chunk of brownie, not really paying attention to anything else. “Sure.” I followed him into one of the other rooms. I looked around the room. Nothing really stood out. I faced him. “What did you want to show me?” “I, uh, actually wanted to talk to you about something,” he looked down at his hands, fidgeting with them. “About what?” I stared at his face; he was a bit pink. I heard Lee and Daddy join the conversation back in the kitchen. “I...I know we’re cousins, but--but I have these feelings…” He still wasn't really looking at my face. I peered toward the empty archway to the room. It was the only entrance and exit, and we were far enough from the kitchen that we couldn’t really hear the other conversation, and they probably couldn’t hear ours. “What do you mean?” I said slowly. He looked up, nervous yet sincere. “I think I really like you, Rita.” Before I could respond or even react--I didn’t know how to if I wanted to--he grabbed my hand and took a step closer to me. What do I do? I didn’t want to be mean to Danny, but I didn’t like him like that. We were cousins for goodness sake. I saw him look at my lips; I started to panic. What do I say? Do I say anything? Should I just try to leave? He was coming closer. “Daddy!” I yelled frantically. Danny jumped back in surprise. Daddy popped into the doorframe a few seconds later looking worried. “What’s wrong, sweetie?” He stepped into the room and put a hand on my arm, scanning my face. “I don’t feel too good,” I glanced at Danny briefly who was now red-faced and ashamed, staring at the carpet. “I think I have a bit of a headache.” “Does your stomach hurt, too?” He asked, guiding me out of the room and away from Danny. “No.” “Do you need any medicine?” “No, I think I just need to lie down or something.” “Okay, sweetie. It might just be from the heat from the drive.” I nodded, sitting in one of the chairs at the kitchen table where everyone else was around. Looking over at Russ and Laney, it looked like someone forced them to wash their hands. Laney was showing Russ some of her toys in the family room connected to the kitchen, continuously taking out toys from the bin and setting them on the ground. When Danny and I were little and over each other’s houses, we used to play farmer. Daddy would be in the field pulling weeds or bad crops, and Danny and I would be in front of the porch, digging small holes, putting pieces of grass or dandelions in them, and then patting the dirt in. It was sweet, innocent fun. And when we were at his house, we would play cops. We’d take turns chasing each other with finger guns, rolling around on the couch like they would over car hoods in movies. Lee said something about the time and everyone started moving, shaking me out of my thoughts. I stood and followed Mama into the cellar, assuming the storm was going to start soon. The cellar was how I remembered it. It was a pretty large room. There was a pantry in the corner, filled with the necessary amount of food; a bathroom was on that side of the room as well. There were two pull out couches, a futon or two against the walls. Over the years, piles of toys have appeared and disappeared in the corner. Russ and Laney rushed the toys, hopping on whatever they could find giddily. Todd yawned in Mama’s arms, and Mama asked if he was sleepy. I sat, curled up, against the wall. Mama and Daddy were sitting next to each other, me near them. Russ was sitting with Laney on the floor at one end of the room, deciding on coloring as tonight’s activity. I set my chin on my arms, trying to think of when it all went wrong. The last time we visited and I saw Danny he seemed fine, he seemed normal. It was only a couple months ago, I think, maybe three months? The last storm was two months ago and it was a small one so we didn’t visit then. How could he have developed feelings like this in such a short time? We hadn’t even seen each other. It didn’t make any sense. He didn’t make any sense. Having a crush on me… I buried the bottom half of my face behind my arms. When I was in schooling, I didn’t have any crushes. The girls were always talking about boys, and the boys were always talking about girls. It was kind of gross, if you ask me. I never really wanted a part of it so my friends didn’t talk much about it with me. I always felt kind of...isolated, but I tried not to get sad about it. I didn’t like boys, or girls, or anybody. But that was okay with me. I just had fun selling Daddy’s crops in town. That was good enough for me. The rain started soon after we came down here. I heard it faintly since we were underground. I looked over to the sound of dry heaving and saw Aunt Gracie leaning over a bucket, Lee holding her hand and rubbing her back. She usually got sick during storms. It was worse depending on how bad the storm was. It was kind of how when people had broken bones they could feel when it was going to rain? Except Aunt Gracie got sick. I heard it was because she got super sick when she was younger and now it affects her like this. I saw movement in front of me; Danny came by to sit next to me. I glanced to the side at Mama and Daddy. They were sitting close, talking quietly to Todd so he could fall asleep. I peered back at Danny cautiously. “Shouldn’t you be taking care of your mama?” I asked defensively. Danny smiled weakly. “My daddy takes care of her good when she’s sick. I don’t have to.” He paused. “I wanted to...can I talk to you?” He waited for me to answer, but I didn't. “I’m...I’m sorry. I know it’s wrong,” he looked at the ground. “I shouldn’t have, um, tried to come at you like that.” I didn’t say anything. “I’m really sorry, Rita.” I didn’t want to say anything. Without looking at him head-on, I could tell he felt sad. He didn’t move, he just sat against the wall near to where I was, silent. A couple hours passed, uneventful. I had gotten up to get a book about bears from the bookshelf. I was on page seventy-eight. Danny was chatting quietly with Russ and Laney. Laney jumped up happily, her dress bouncing with her; I think she stood just to show off her dress. It was light pink. Russ rubbed his eye with his fist; he was probably tired. I stared at the page of my book, not really reading it, but thinking about the bears in the book. This book was made after they all died off; the publication date was twenty years ago. The first chapter talked about how the global climate made it nearly impossible for the bears to continue living. Now they were all extinct. I frowned. The pictures of them looked so cute, it was unfortunate they weren’t around anymore. Suddenly, we heard the sound of glass shattering somewhere from above. We all looked up at the ceiling in vain. “Shit,” Lee said helplessly. “Probably one of the windows we didn’t get to reinforce yet.” Lee looked grim. The storm breaking one of his windows early on meant he was going to have a lot of water damage. The house will probably flood by morning. But there wasn’t much any of us could do. I looked towards Mama and Daddy. They looked equally as helpless. Our windows weren't really reinforced either. We were going to get home in a couple days and figure out how to deal with all the damage. A large crack in the sky boomed all around us. The lights flickered. Russ and Laney stopped what they were doing out of fear. Russ was afraid of the dark, and I think Laney didn’t really like noise storms. She stood up and held onto Danny’s sleeve. When the lights flickered again, Russ ran to Daddy; Daddy hugged him with one arm while he still had an arm around Mama. “What if the lights go out?” I heard Russ say to Daddy in a small voice. “We’ve got a generator, don’t you worry,” Lee chimed in. Russ looked to Daddy for clarification. He smiled. “That means that if the lights go out, the generator for the cellar will keep the lights down here on, even if the ones upstairs are still out.” I sat with my book, glancing at Danny for a moment, who I noticed was staring at me. He looked away. I looked back at my book. The grizzly bear. Similar to what we’re doing now, hibernate during the winter. They stock up food, huddle with their family, and wait for the storm to pass.