#like actually making them scary and stuff
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So I'm playing Mass Effect for the first time, and coming out of Veilguard Mass Effect is so jarring in such a wonderful way.
I am right at the beginning of this game and I've already had two side quests which I doubt will add anything to the overarching, but which actually make you THINK about what is the right decision:
A man contacted me about his dead wife. The military won't give back her body so he can't give her a funeral. He asks for your help to get her back. Pretty simple? Except when you get to the military officer he tells you the reason she hasn't been given back is that her body is one of the only bodies they have killed by this specific new and scary weapon. They think they could potentially find ways to defend/cure what happens to you when this weapon is used, but to do so they'll need to be able to work with actual bodies that suffered this damage; and there are so few of them. If they don't find ways of stopping this weapons effects on human bodies it could end up risking thousands of lives. So what do you do? Do you go with the husbands wishes, so he can have closure? She never signed up for this kind of medical research post death! But then, if you push for the body back, what if that really DOES affect their ability to find a cure and protect humanity in the future? Is the trade off worth it?
A woman is refusing to get her baby screened for a genetic disease that killed her husband and has a high chance of killing her baby if the baby inherits it. But there's a 1/3000 chance the procedure could hurt the baby more. Her brother in law is desperate for the baby to get scanned because the disease could be easily cured in-utro if it is found, but not once the baby is born (I don't 100% think this is realistic but hey it's the future whatever). They want your advice on what to do. This is pretty simple, basically, philosophy 101 questioning but it's STILL like. A morality decision the game is asking you to help with
These are both pretty simple; they're good for world building but you could skip them entirely and still have a good game experience. But I wanted to highlight them both because this is EXACTLY what Veilguard was missing. These 'no objectively 100% correct' tiny side quest questions that force the player to think about the world; or allow for deep characterisations of your player character.
Idk man. Like. Bioware was doing this stuff right 15 years ago. It's a real shame that energy isn't still valued because it makes for a MUCH better experience imo
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Dialtown is the most USA-core game I've ever played. It's so fucking American that it's scary, and I've lived there my entire life! Like, this feels fundamentally tied with the game's themes and narrative, that's how extreme it is. And it's not even alienating OR nationalist?? It makes such genuine commentary? And then there's so much other shit to think about too; Dialtown has a very real identity outside this that anyone could love?
One: I am VERY impressed that you have done the USA and its people this well. I am actually astounded, bewildered, and chuffed. I've never felt so seen by a video game, culturally-speaking. I didn't even know there was a culture to see.
Two: WHY did you do that. Dialtown is like USA Culture Absurdified: The Visual Novel. What drove you to make a game this rich with American culture and ideas???
Hello!
It would've been odd for an outsider (non American) who enjoys reading up on history to make my setting nationalist or alienating. America is a country with a lot of serious issues. You can't really study how America is (and has been) internally run without facing glaring and obvious systematic issues. DT's setting is one of scarcity and most of the main characters you follow in DT are kinda just scraping by without much hope for true mobility/advancement. A lot of Americans (especially younger generations) would agree this sorta encapsulates the national mood of the country right now.
Of course, the systems that run a country don't define its citizens - many of the finest people I've ever known are American and are victims of the whims of those with power, not willing participants in this system. I could be wrong, but that's why I think the setting connected with a lot of people. We all know Randys, Olivers + Karens, people who've fallen through the cracks in some way. To them, America's spirit of self-determination isn't about individual identity - it's more "you're on your own."
Why I chose to set DT in America would be a novel length answer in of itself, but it mainly came down to history + narrative opportunity. I wanted to set the game in the epicenter of where the phone-revolution came from and Crown likely couldn't have pulled his plan off anywhere else and probably not during any other time. It had to be 1960's America.
Of course, some parts of DT are sorta universal and were inspired by the the Great Recession and what followed. I remember there was an area not that far from my house that was full of green fields when I was born and when I was a kid (and when real estate boomed), stuff started being built there. Parts of it looked really nice, not quite like anything nearby. Like the future was coming. Then the economy crashed and stuff was left sitting there, half-built for like a decade. Skeletal, unfinished buildings. DT is much the same.
There's a feeling that the city could've been something better and while things could be more equal, it does feel like there are no easy solutions to fix everything - unless someone very smart and determined somehow bypassed every safeguard that was set up to halt radical change and enacted a genius plan to somehow eliminate scarcity. It happened once and might never again.
I don't think most people understand the intricacies of stuff like global commerce all that well (myself included), but when you're sitting looking at a half built neighbourhood mere hours after speaking to a friend who just kicked out of rented accommodation and doesn't have a stable family unit to fall back on, you'd have to be a real dolt not to understand that things aren't great right now. Most people are scraping by and feel if they could just get affordable housing locked down, if they had maybe one good opportunity - maybe there's hope that things could change for the better.
The end of DT isn't really utopian, things don't massively change for the better and indeed, the town has a lot of rebuilding to do. But, a collection of lonely people are now looking out for each other and through the relationships they have, now feel like they have a place in this world. That no matter how bad things really get - they aren't truly by themselves anymore. Most individuals don't have the means to significantly advance change on their own - but you can live your life, love those around you and support others and plan for when the opportunity to affect change comes about.
I guess that's what life is, in America or anywhere else. Sorry I rambled for so long. Hope this answered the question!
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Out of the closet
I absolutely cannot get my mind off of Hiroaki coming out as gay so I had to draw this.
Analysis under cut
I have to much to think about this whole scene of Hiroaki coming out of the closet. Starting to think about it, you really come to understand just how important him being gay and closeted is to his character and backstory, especially being a celebrity in Japan.
At first when Hiroaki first admitted he liked guys I was absolutely over the moon, and frankly I still am but it became apparent quickly just how devastating the scene actually was on Hiroaki’s side. It’s clear that Hiroaki felt pressured to come out of the closet like that from how the conversation with Yanagi was escalating. With Yanagi accusing Hiroaki hooking up and dropping out of relationships with all these women for no reason and Hiroaki forcing to admit that the reason things were like that was because he’s gay. He was backed into a corner and forced to come out, even if that wasn’t Yanagi’s intention. Thankfully Yanagi was supportive and understand but Hiroaki’s first time coming out of the closet being in a way like this must’ve been really scary for him, and especially how he broke down crying at the end of the conversation. Because even if he was accepted in this one situation, the feeling of panic and having to admit a personal violation which if he was outside the killing game, would’ve stemmed the end for him, would’ve been incredibly traumatic.
Hiroaki is a celebrity, so the pressure to hide his homosexuality would’ve been even more intense than the average person. Due to the nature of homophobia in Japan, his job very much could’ve been on the line with him forcing to hide being gay. His management team has created out this image for him of him being a ladies man and womaniser constantly hooking him up with relationships with other popular girls. And Hiroaki only adheres to them from the idea of getting popular through followers and stuff. And I can definitely imagine that through hooking up and even sleeping with all these women he’s desperately trying to convince himself that he’s not gay and that it’ll pass in time. Even bragging to Yanagi over all these sexual relations he’s had with over ten women to keep up his image, even though he doesn’t truly care about it because he’s not into women, and never truly loved any of them. And it was only for appearances and PR. And maybe even during that time there could’ve been some rumours of him being gay circulating which could’ve furthered this.
I can’t imagine how uncomfortable it would’ve been for Hiroaki to live a comphet life ike this and Yanagi put this very well. Hiroaki wasn’t born into riches and had to work extremely hard to become the multi millionaire that he is and having the risk of losing all of that over people finding out that he’s gay, I could imagine how scary that would’ve been for him. And why he accepted to doing all this stuff. And in the end when he confessed to Yanagi that he likes guys instead of women, it was probably also him admitting it to himself in a way. That this is a major step in Hiroaki’s arc that has been stemming back for years in his life when he started to realise it.
All of this makes me think back to Hiroaki’s student spotlight near the beginning of chapter 2. Looking back to how he freaked out so much about those questions asking about his relationship with Ojima makes so much sense in retrospect now, knowing that he’s a closeted homosexual. And even though the questions asked weren’t directly related to a potential romantic connection with Ojima he still interpreted it as an accusation and got very defensive and aggressive. Even telling the original asker to get a life and friends. From how much he’s had to hide this part about himself and Hiroaki’s attitude of lashing out at people who get too close to or annoy him, especially in chapter 1. He probably got very uncomfortable and defensive here. And it makes me think if he’s ever been accused like this in his personal life. And how distressing it must be to him of the idea of people looking into his life and making accusations like this which could potentially ruin his career and an to an extent, his life.
So all of this and Hiroaki coming out as gay, I feel like it’s very safe to assume now that he has a crush on/is in love with Ojima. Even though I feel that people are making Hiroaki’s coming out scene more about hirojima then how personal it is to his story, it’s definitely something worth talking about. Hiroaki said that he did know for a few years by know that he liked guys, and due to his high standing as a celebrity and especially in Japan where being queer is still heavily stigmatised in society, he never got to properly be true to himself. And now in the killing game where he’s completely separated from the outside world and trapped with 15 other students who didn’t know him. Perhaps that could be a reason why he was acting more overly affectionate with Ojima if he had less of a worry of public perception, but I don’t know, that’s just speculation. And even from the initial interview at the beginning of the series him showing interest in him. And how over time we’ve seen Hiroaki and Ojima truly develop a strong mutual bond and with the very high likelihood that Hiroaki has fallen in love with him, all the ways this could go is so interesting. This is likely the first time Hiroaki has truly fallen in love with someone which isn’t just some PR stunt. And how with Ojima genuinely caring about Hiroaki and being supportive to him in his lowest of times and is actually able to see him for who he is. He’s one of the rare instances Hiroaki has had a figure in his life who isn’t toxic or has a part in upholding his image and covering up his true self. I can definitely see the possibility of Hiroaki actually confessing to Ojima happen some time, or even then becoming a romantic couple. And something like that would be a huge step in both of their arcs especially with Hiroaki coming to terms with his sexuality after a life of lies. And that’s where I would normally talk about Ojima’s story leading up to this as well, but that’s an analysis for another time.
So yeah that’s my thoughts on this reveal and why I love how big of a personal moment it is for Hiroaki. Exploring a specific story of coming to terms with homosexuality in an unforgiving celebrity industry where one has to try so hard to hide it is such an incredibly interesting narrative and by this one confirmation of him being gay, recontextualises so much of Hiroaki’s story and lots of things starting to make a lot more sense now. And I truly cannot wait to see what the future will hold for this narrative.
(Apparently this post isn’t showing up if I put too many tags so here’s my extra thoughts on it Oop)
#tetro danganronpa pink#tetro danganronpa#tetro danganronpa pink spoilers#tetro danganronpa spoilers#Hiroaki Nakamigawa#fanganronpa#tw homophobia
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So what is happening in your Blades in the Dark Game exactly? The Midnight Runners Specifically?
[Takes a deep breath in] OK so this is gonna take a bit.
Blades in the Dark: The Midnight Runners was run by my friend colinomicon on The Lost Caravan RPG twitch channel at the start of 2024. (You can find 3 out of 4 sessions on the youtube channel, sadly the 4th is lost to time and space.) The premise of the game was the 1979 film "The Warriors".
Where The Warrior leaves their turf in Coney Island to take part in a meeting in uptown NY city called by the largest gang in the city. Things go south and The Warriors have to survive the night and get back to their turf whilst everyone thinks it is their fault things went wrong at the meeting. So our game followed that premise but with a bit more to it.
In our game The Midnight Runners is a small gang of drug producers/movers that specialize in "Blue Lips" a psychedelic mushroom that grows on corpses. It mimics the "going into the light" feeling people have in near death experiences, though untreated the shrooms cause actual death. The gang knows how to make the shrooms safe to consume and also how to make the purest high, so they corner the market on Blue Lips.
The members are (L to R)
Rust: The Cutter. The muscle of the group. Loves to fight and fuck, typically in that order.
Soda Pop: The Hound. Second in command and drug tester. Drinks a lot of soda pops, like so much. There is a post about her pre episode 4.
Cricket: The Lurk. "God's favourite child", an ex Blue Lips junkie and sneak thief. Likes having a place she feels she belongs and River.
River: The Whisper. She sees dead people and talks them into moving on which makes the Blue Lips high all the better. She likes stuff... she is insane but she likes Cricket.
Dexy. The Leader. Botanist, mother figure, the best of us all. GM NPC.
The gang got their invite to the big meeting called by The Unseen by crashing a big old fundraiser/ball at the Academy and getting everyone high as balls off Blue Lips that was added to the beef wellington and vegetarian dishes. As well as having smashed so many priceless antiquities and releasing some ghosts in the process.
There was a lot of downtime and flashbacks that happened in episodes 2 and 3 so I'd suggest checking out the videos that didn't get lost to time and space, cause I think we were entertaining and brilliant.
At the meeting (which they had to go to without any weaponry since a truce was called), all the leaders were called up to the stage to talk with the leader of The Unseen... Only for a bomb to go off. Killing a lot of the leaders, including Dexy. Dexy had been wearing a piece of pottery that served as a new calling card for the gang and that unfortunately survived the explosion and made everyone think that The Midnight Runners had set up the bomb.
Episode 4, which is sadly missing, was the gang trying to get back to Barrowcleft.
Dodging gangs and the police. Dangerously climbing under a bridge to bypass a barricade. Fighting Soda's old bounty hunter mentor who was trying to collect the bounty on them. Fighting a gang with a ghost toilet cover, River called up a useless ghost of a man that died on the toilet along with the ghost of his toilet. So Rust having no weapons armed himself with the cover from the ghost toilet and bashed a man's head in.
Getting back onto their boat to try to make it home, only for the mostly exploded leader of the Grinders, Marlo, sitting in the boat being a scary badass. Luckily talked her into not killing us all with her one good hand.
Got back to Barrowcleft only to find our hideout, the barn, on fire surrounded by cops. Decided, fuck it, we are going in live. Ends up that "Officer Muttonchops", a seemingly joke of a man, was the one that set up the bomb and pinned it on us... Soda shot him through the eye before he could get into his whole villain monologue. Everyone ran in swinging: River summoned a lightning storm, Rust punched his way through, Cricket armed herself with dynamite from some stashes, and Soda made her shots count.
In the end The Unseen showed up and ended the conflict. Apologizing for thinking we were to blame for the death of their leader and offered us reparations. We said we'd need a new hideout and since we needed new corpses for Blue Lips, we'd be taking the cops'.
That is how it went. Hope that answers your question.
#answer#blades in the dark#blades in the dark the midnight runners#the midnight runners#ttrpg#ttrpg art
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I am having Arlo/Neige thoughts again so. Here is some rambling and headcanons about their relationship!!!
tagging!! @jadelover69 @kirexa @lallopsyou @miriaocs @jovieinramshackle
- Arlo is originally only interested in photography but after talking with Neige so often, he ends up getting into film making. However all of his films end up weirdly sad at first and make Neige cry so he has to ban him from watching them lmao. Eventually he starts making happier things!!
- once they’re adults Neige ends up getting Arlo to do most of his photo shoots, mostly because Arlo prioritizes him being comfortable and happy and other people tend to not really care about his opinions as much.
- they go to the movies literally so often. so many movie nights. Neige is the BIGGEST fan and it’s infectious. they watch stuff and then talk about it for hours afterwards.
- when they first start dating Arlo is initially really nervous about coming off as too intense, and Neige IMMEDIATELY dispels that fear by buying him a bouquet of flowers for three dates in a row.
- they share clothes a lot, and Vil is SO MAD every time he has to see Neige’s sweater 😭
- previously thought to be incapable of hating anyone, Neige hates Arlo’s entire immediate family lmao
- following up on Neige thinking it would be fun to play a villain, he expresses this to Arlo once who says he can’t really picture him like that and would be interested to see if he could pull it off. Cue Neige jokingly acting out a villain character and Arlo immediately becoming so flustered he can’t speak. (He likes every version of Neige, but this one was just unexpected, okay?!)
- Arlo only takes photos of his own volition if he thinks things are beautiful, which usually means he never takes photos of people unless he’s asked to for a job. He doesn’t try to hide this, either.
- Neige invites him out to see cherry blossom trees at some point, and while he’s looking at them he hears a click and turns to see Arlo taking a picture of him. ��Sorry, I just wanted to.” Arlo doesn’t realize it’s actually a big deal at first until Neige gets really flustered and happy about it.
- Neige gets asked in an interview once who his ideal partner would be, to which he answers “someone charming, sweet, and passionate!” Arlo immediately breaks a vase in pomefiore and then picks a fight with a third year lmao
- while NRC students tend to get pretty angry and chase out RSA students when they visit, Neige can visit all he wants because he’s with Arlo (who has a reputation similar to the Leech twins, just with a different vibe)
- Occasionally, when Vil is particularly annoyed, he’ll drag along Arlo to his joint shoots in hope that it will distract Neige. This works but also frequently backfires, because Neige then puts in extra effort.
- Neige is VERY public and vocal about how much he loves his boyfriend once they start dating (with Arlo’s permission, of course). He posts a ridiculous amount of pictures with the two of them, and nearly every time he has to talk in an interview he somehow manages to mention how much he loves Arlo 😭
- Arlo definitely cried over this a few times. He goes from never believing anyone at all will love him to having a partner who literally tells every single person at any opportunity how much he cares for him. It takes him a while to process it’s real.
- Despite no one thinking he would be, Arlo is a very, VERY supportive partner. Neige tells him about a charity or cause he’s trying to raise funds for and you KNOW he’s going to stand menacingly behind his boyfriend and glare at anyone who thinks the charity is pointless or stupid. You WILL donate.
- Neige now has scary dog privilege but the scary dog is actually the tiniest piranha merman ever. rip my boy for being 5’2. (He can still bite with razor sharp teeth with force 30 times his body weight though, so like. run?)
#twisted wonderland#disney twst#twst oc#twst original character#arlo wake oc#neige leblanche#twst neige#twst headcanons
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Can you walk all the way around it? Mercury - NO. You'd think so but it's way too close to the sun, it's too hot, you'd probably need a big umbrella and they've never taken one to space. Venus - NO. It's basically the same size as earth, incredibly boring because no fun landmarks, way too foggy, huge risk of getting lost. Earth - Yes, BUT. You can walk all the way around it, but the problem here is that other people have already done it. Sure it's possible, but nobody's gonna care. Mars - NO. It's a nice place, with a beautiful sky, nice temperatures for a holiday, and lots of robots to make friends with, but don't let those 'rivers' fool you. There's nothing to drink on Mars, and as we all know, walking around a planet is thirsty work! Jupiter - NO. You're not allowed to because it's too gassy and let's be honest, you would get tired too fast. It's the biggest planet ever discovered!* Saturn - Yes, BUT. The problem is not the size, despite what pictures will show you it's actually much bigger than the inch across that google images pretends it is. The problem is not resources, it's probably got a lot more food and drink than the pictures show too, it's named after the roman god of harvest! The issue you would face is having to look up as you sleep in your sleeping bag every night and see that fucking ring. And you know that even if you walk all the way around Saturn (which is totally doable), that for the rest of your life, everybody you ever talk to will ask you 'wait the planet or the ring' and you will have to look them in the eye and sadly explain that you can't walk on the ring because it's not actually solid, it's lots of little bits of stuff and they're not joined together. Uranus - NO. To take a quote from NASA's (leading spaciologists) website, "Uranus' environment is not conducive to life as we know it. The temperatures, pressures, and materials that characterize this planet are most likely too extreme and volatile for organisms to adapt to." It's impossible to even think about walking when the conditions are that bad, but there might be public transport if you need to take short trips. Neptune - NO. To be honest we forgot about this one, but it's named after that the ocean king or something and that's really scary, so you're probably not missing out on much. Pluto - YES!!!!! Pluto is literally the perfect planet, if your legs are long enough you can probably do it in a day, but I would suggest taking your time to really enjoy the sights. It's really far away from the sun, so you don't need sunscreen, and at since it gets to 35K (Kelsius maybe?) at night, you'll not even need a blanket! Most importantly, since '''scientists''' decided it's no longer a planet, it's left off of a lot of brochures, so there won't be any annoying tourists pushing up motel prices. A lovely weekend visit!
Honourable mention - The Sun. Lots of people asked me to add this to the list because they see it on planet charts but it's actually not a planet and is instead something else. I hope this helps!
*No it's not.
i think my only big disagreement with the consensus of pluto not being a planet is that dwarf planets aren't considered a type of planet. like, why aren't they just a subclass of planet. the major planets and minor planets. sorry but these bitches are more interesting than me than mars
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the thing is that they're so fascinated by sex, they love sex, they can't imagine a world without sex - they need sex to sell things, they need sex to be part of their personality, they need sex to prove their power - but they hate sex. they are disgusted by it.
sex is the only thing that holds their attention, and it is also the thing that can never be discussed directly.
you can't tell a child the normal names for parts of their body, that's sexual in nature, because the body isn't a body, it's a vessel of sex. it doesn't matter that it's been proven in studies (over and over) that kids need to know the names of their genitals; that they internalize sexual shame at a very young age and know it's 'dirty' to have a body; that it overwhelmingly protects children for them to have the correct words to communicate with. what matters is that they're sexual organs. what matters is that it freaks them out to think about kids having body parts - which only exist in the context of sex.
it's gross to talk about a period or how to check for cancer in a testicle or breast. that is nasty, illicit. there will be no pain meds for harsh medical procedures, just because they feature a cervix.
but they will put out an ad of you scantily-clad. you will sell their cars for them, because you have abs, a body. you will drip sex. you will ooze it, like a goo. like you were put on this planet to secrete wealth into their open palms.
they will hit you with that same palm. it will be disgusting that you like leather or leashes, but they will put their movie characters in leather and latex. it will be wrong of you to want sexual freedom, but they will mark their success in the number of people they bed.
they will crow that it's inappropriate for children so there will be no lessons on how to properly apply a condom, even to teens. it's teaching them the wrong things. no lessons on the diversity of sexual organ growth, none on how to obtain consent properly, none on how to recognize when you feel unsafe in your body. if you are a teenager, you have probably already been sexualized at some point in your life. you will have seen someone also-your-age who is splashed across a tv screen or a magazine or married to someone three times your age. you will watch people pull their hair into pigtails so they look like you. so that they can be sexy because of youth. one of the most common pornography searches involves newly-18 young women. girls. the words "barely legal," a hiss of glass sand over your skin.
barely legal. there are bills in place that will not allow people to feel safe in their own bodies. there are people working so hard to punish any person for having sex in a way that isn't god-fearing and submissive. heteronormative. the sex has to be at their feet, on your knees, your eyes wet. when was the first time you saw another person crying in pornography and thought - okay but for real. she looks super unhappy. later, when you are unhappy, you will close your eyes and ignore the feeling and act the role you have been taught to keep playing. they will punish the sex workers, remove the places they can practice their trade safely. they will then make casual jokes about how they sexually harass their nanny.
and they love sex but they hate that you're having sex. you need to have their ornamental, perfunctory, dispassionate sex. so you can't kiss your girlfriend in the bible belt because it is gross to have sex with someone of the same gender. so you can't get your tubes tied in new england because you might change your mind. so you can't admit you were sexually assaulted because real men don't get hurt, you should be grateful. you cannot handle your own body, you cannot handle the risks involved, let other people decide that for you. you aren't ready yet.
but they need you to have sex because you need to have kids. at 15, you are old enough to parent. you are not old enough to hear the word fuck too many times on television.
they are horrified by sex and they never stop talking about it, thinking about it, making everything unnecessarily preverted. the saying - a thief thinks everyone steals. they stand up at their podiums and they look out at the crowd and they sign a bill into place that makes sexwork even more unsafe and they stand up and smile and sign a bill that makes gender-affirming care illegal and they get up and they shrug their shoulders and write don't say gay and they get up, and they make the world about sex, but this horrible, plastic vision of it that they have. this wretched, emotionless thing that holds so much weight it's staggering. they put their whole spine behind it and they push and they say it's normal!
this horrible world they live in. disgusted and also obsessed.
#this shifts gender so much bc it actually affects everyone#yes it's a gendered phenomenon. i have written a LOT about how different genders experience it. that's for a different post.#writeblr#ps my comments about seeing someone cry -- this is not to shame any person#and on this blog we support workers.#at the same time it's a really hard experience to see someone that looks like you. clearly in agony. and have them forced to keep going.#when you're young it doesn't necessarily look like acting. it looks scary. and that's what this is about - the fact that teens#have likely already been exposed to that definition of things. because the internet exists#and without the context of healthy education. THAT is the image burned into their minds about what it looks like.#it's also just one of those personal nuanced biases -#at 19 i thought it was normal to be in pain. to cry. to not-like-it. that it should be perfunctory.#it was what i had seen.#and it didn't help that my religious upbringing was like . 'yeah that's what you get for premarital. but also for the reference#we do think you should never actually enjoy it lol'#so like the point im making is that ppl get exposed to that stuff without the context of something more tender#and assume .... 'oh. so it's fine i am not enjoying myself'. and i know they do because I DID.#he was my first boyfriend. how was i supposed to know any different#i didn't even have the mental wherewithal to realize im a lesbian . like THAT used to suffering.
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Bruce is actually really attractive, and I have enough reasoning to make a list
He's:
Tall (. Tall enough to hit his head on the vault doorframe)
Long-legged
Has a straight nose bridge
Has high cheekbones (more noticeable in 2nd pic below)
Has a strong jawline
Sharp eyes, but they aren't small (plus eyebags if you're into that)
Overall, he has strong, attractive facial features
Has broad, refined shoulders. You can tell he works out (or he did, when he was alive)
Even has a thick, muscly neck
He has MUSCLE. Is SCULPTED. NOICE. VERY NOICE. (nice arms. Nice shoulders. Nice neck. Nice legs. Nice butt-)
(There are actually panels where you can see some of his muscles. Other than those already shown here, he's got bricky thighs-
-and in the panels where we first get his name dropped, he's got those shoulder blades too-)
The one time we see him smile, and he actually has a scary one
Has small, kinda sharp pupils, and his eyes remind me of a cat. We only ever saw him tense or defensive, so his resting/listening face is really cute
Other than the physical appearance stuff, he also:
Takes shit without batting an eye (patience, knowing it's just how Kudo is, etc)
Kudo being all "Cut the crap Bruce and give it to me straight", after Bruce tests his blood and is rightfully Concerned because they just faced AFO
Put up with Kudo's experimenting and testing over Yoichi's transferable Factor
Did ya'll see the look on Kudo's face when he realized he had Yoichi's Factor/will? Kudo was going to start in nonsense and Bruce just dealt with that.
Also something I noticed when looking back at the images here; Bruce has bandages on his arms in the void. But not when he faced AFO in the sewers.
Were he and Kudo cutting their arms open in their experimenting over Yoichi's theory? Is this why Kudo has two gauntlets instead of his one? Why we never see his bare arms in the void? That he always keeps his arms down so there's no slip?
Is smart enough to run blood tests, plus has enough common sense to pick Shinomori as his successor
He picked a guy who avoids society, has an Ability to detect danger so he can always stay away from AFO, is also a coward so he's never going to go throw himself into danger, even without knowing instinctively he stands no chance, etc.
Meanwhile, Kudo chose Bruce, who he played Hot Potato Yoichi with; but he did also trust Bruce, and put the only pure combative Ability in OFA through Bruce.
These two made their choices based on what they valued and saw the Factor needed.
Is logical, analytical, and calm.
He tried advising Midoriya on their Abilities in One For All, especially his own.
Midoriya then tried ignoring him about using Fa Jin for the first time, but found he was right, thinking: "Dammit!! I had [Lady Nagant] right where I wanted her, but... ugh! The Third was right. My parallel Quirk processes are all screwed up!" (ch. 314).
Plus, when Midoriya fixed his processing mistakes, Bruce was analyzing the way he reached his new conclusion. Pure facts, no bias, very calm, just saying it as it was.
We never see him panic. When he's caught by surprise in the sewers by AFO, Kudo, and Yoichi's little bubble event, he immediately reacts. He doesn't falter, he just knows he has to do something right now.
Was more willing to listen than Kudo to Yoichi's beckon, and probably was just following Kudo's rejection of Midoriya
While we don't see Kudo's face, we see Bruce's eyes when Yoichi calls on his heroes. Bruce was more open and receptive, or at least more impacted.
Bruce was also the one to start talking, while Kudo just kept quiet.
He actually communicates a lot
When Yoichi called them to support Midoriya, Bruce started talking to paint a picture of why they thought the way they did, so Yoichi understood where they were coming from.
(Though he seems to beat about the bush sometimes, since Kudo spoke up to be direct on how they couldn't just put their trust in some starry-eyed teenager. Plus, when Kudo tells him to just tell him what's wrong [double Factors])
When Midoriya first used Fa Jin against Nagant, Bruce came out just to tell him he knew what he was trying, but that Midoriya wasn't ready; and Midoriya found he was right. Midoriya just didn't want to listen to him then.
He asks Kudo for clarification after finding Kudo had two Factors in him after the sewer incident ("Just to be sure, All For One didn't touch you, right?") Kudo knew him well enough to go "stop beating around the bush and tell me", so Bruce was probably gonna start with questions, theories, and trying to understand everything in general, before saying "yeah you have two Factors. Don't know why".
Is strong-willed and loyal.
He followed Kudo, even to death, carrying on the cause he started until it ended with him.
Plus, when talking about how AFO needs a strong will to override OFA's own, we first see Bruce, Kudo, and Yoichi.
AFO couldn't steal OFA because the will was too strong for him, and that was back during Banjo's time. Since Shinomori never actually tried opposing AFO and just hid, we can assume the first Three (Yoichi, Kudo, Bruce) already had an accumulation of strong willpower that made OFA un-stealable. Those three are a strong enough foundation, and the main wills, that the other users just become bonuses.
Kudo, also saying that Midoriya needs allies with the same will and drive as him... hey Kudo, you're talking about yourself and your old allies, aren't you? That's why you look at Yoichi and Bruce when you say this.
Not only is Bruce attractive, but he's got good character. THE END.
#yes this is a bruce appreciation post#am i biased? yes. am i right that he has these features? also yes.#hes actually a very attractive person. hes got all the right features for it#plus hes smart (some medical knowledge) is really loyal strong-willed and patient#he puts up with kudo SO much#from being bossed around to taking home yoichis brother to whatever the heck kudo made him do to figure out OFA's transfer properties.....#i didnt think much of bruce originally#then i started doing resistance fic stuff and now hes a fave#hes a little blorbo#that i throw in terrible situations for my own entertainment#used his scary smile for comedy purposes#like when he made a kid cry once. or when a meta child was afraid of him so they bit him#has patience to deal with kudo and co. but also. has enough bite to snark them. is how i like writing him#oh? background character? well lemme just *picks him up* EXPAND ON THAT-#fic stuff: he tries making a good impression on a girl and kudo is ruining it immediately#he doesnt know what to do because the two always banter#kudo: fuck you#oc: fuck me yourself you coward#he sees through a rose-lens that kudo is trying to rip off his face#appeciation kinda turned analysis in general#bruce#kudo#yoichi shigaraki#bnha#mha#spoilers#boku no hero academia#my hero academia#NOT YOICHIS BROTHER. i meant Yoichi / AFO's brother in a prev tag up there but theres too much tags i dont wanna rewrite to fix that#(image limit and tag limit)
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'I wont cry for you, I wont crucify the things you do. I wont cry for you, see, when you're gone, I'll still be BLOODY MARY'
#cw blood#SUUUPER SCUFFED LIL WIP THATS BEEN RRRROTTING IN MY FOLDER. OUT!! GET OUT!!!#its almos 2 am and imm gettin high as hrothgar. spruced this up within an hour so i could be shared n eaten#its SUPPOsed to be part ofa bigger doodly page so ofc theres the chance this changes between now n then#fuuuuck shoulda made her dress sparkly. fuckit ill fix it laterrrrr. i havnt posted art in YWEARRS i needed to post something#also i uh. well you see i started losing followers on twitter bc im sooo inactive and i KNOW that shouldnt matter like it should be whateve#but. you see. i lkike when number go up and when it go down i get MMMADDD.we all get our dopamine from somewhere#ANYWAY so i actually havnt touched the suckening in so long. been workin on oc stuff.BUT WELL. ARTHUR AND MARY. STILL MAKE ME WEEP#THEYRE SO CUTE N TRAGIC...whadda fuck is it with grizzly n charlie characters being so in love and so doomed#kian and becky then arthur and his various exes like CMAHn.stop doing this to me#from what i remember of the episode.she seemed so.tired.disconnected.like she had been wandering a dream#and yet she seemed so positive.reasonably concerned and yet.content.she warmed up to arthur as soon as she recognized him#she speaks so gently and so sweetly and she keeps the conversation so light.even though shes dead and shes gone and she#is doomed to wander an odd limbo for the rest of time.and yet she seemed so at peace.i can see why arthur liked her.what happened?#what caused them to separate?arthur seems so jaded and so tired.marys company seems like such a gentle place to rest.#how did he squander such a blessing?was it a blessing?OHH what i would give to crack open their minds and peer inside.#yknow wat im runnign out of room i think so ill add a last thought here at the bottom of my tags. I AM MORE CORRECT ABT ARHTURS UGLY LOOK#I WANT THAT MAN TO BE BEASTLY AND GROSS AND STRANGE AND SCARY AND EEWWW I SEE THINGS SQUIRMING IN THE DARK.ther are bugs#LETTING HIM HAVE HOT HOT ABBS AND STUFF WAS A COP OUUTTTT LET HIS WHOLE FORM BE DISTORTED OR UR NOT A FUCKING 0 APPEARANCE BITCH#THE BONES SHIFTED BENEATH AS IF TRYING TO HATCH. MANY OTHER THINGS HATCHED ASWELL. THE DEAD IMMORTAL FLESH SOURED#TOO GRAND TO ROT BUT TOO CORRUPTED TO KEEP CLASSIC FORM. MMMONSTER MONSTER MONSTER MONSTER#oka y im not going to bed but im gonna go. uh. do miore drugs or something. maybe ill work on more jrwi stuff. or oc stuff.#i hope ur day goes swimmingly thankyou for reading my tags i love you so so so so so much
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I can see this vision
my evil plan is to become a content farm for media that does not exist whatsoever i mean id still put effort into those animations, so it wouldn't even be a content farm .. but the intention is still there!!! it counts!! Shmeepy Deeby's Playtime Land sad backstory part 39 Do you understand me
#Except for me it would be my own takes of pre existing medias#like actually making them scary and stuff#Like maybe the channel could start with your generic “POPPY PLAYTIME but the COLORS are MISSING”#but then later on it would actually be some spooky/dark take on the game#aka a good ol bait and switch
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I think the most baffling thing about the Tulpar as a vessel to me is the fact that the ship really did only have a one way communication system.
I know it was cheap but even the most basic of vessels regarding major transport would have some way, shape or form for outside communication. Not only that but there was absolutely no form of innate emergency signal to show they may have been offline or in trouble despite clearly having a system to dock credits if they went off course. It's another factor that really shows that bad situations are made to get worse by design. One person who is required to relay all information to the crew and make all the choices without feedback. No way to update or call for help in case of a dire situation. No way to inform of inner personal conflicts and acquire procedures accordingly.
It really is like they are all in some sort of fucked up solitary confinement. They have their own world with strict roles that are meaningless in the end, as long as the cargo makes it, it doesn't matter what happens on that ship to the company. They don't want to hear anything and will come to conclusions on what happened based on how much pay they can withhold from the workers. Even what they do send is short, sterile and corporate to the extent it was likely written and sent out with a command by some random unmanned computer in an office.
There's something to be said about how unfair it is to force absolute power and control onto one person when you as an entity could do so much more to offload it but I've said it many times before so I won't again.
#its just like idk i dont think Curly was a bad captain because we only have this scenerio and I certainly dont think a man like Swansea#would like him or have very little issues with him specifically if he was incompentent or too lienent in the past but I do think the stress#was making him worse and worse as being a present leader as it dawned on him how much he actually had to handle like I really think he#just wanted to do yknow normal captain pilot stuff and fly the ship and yknow the little stuff like make sure things run right and over tim#the constant stress and strain of having to make every major choice started to grate on him and freak him out cause they cant even fucking#eat unless he pulls out the scanner and starts cooking like he has to choose the meal likely or have a vote and i make that part of the#reason he seems so indecisive and inactive is the fact he has to make the choice all the time and he's hoping he can at least make the crew#feel a little more in control of themselves as people by staying out of affairs like the game or disputes because god he literally has to#choose for them all the time like thats a lot of responsibility monitering their sleep their breaks food consumption thats all on him like#it really should be another persons job entirely as thats almost like absoulte contrl over the lives of everyone else that PE forces onto#that title and its also crazy how everyone accepts it even if they dont like it like they broke the food machine open rather than get the#scanner they all waited two months before Jimmy appointed himself leader its so scary how conditioned they all are to the environemnt#cause that sort of mindset is sadly real where people just wait everyone just waited until it was getting real dire and then they still#followed Jimmy without too many complaints like i saw a fic or post where Anya acknowledges they all kinda just let Jimmy do what they want#because he became the captain and it was stupid on all their parts cause they could clearly see how bad he was and yet he was captain so#they just fell in line to their roles and thats a bigger point towards how PE treated them and the complacency capitalism brings to you#just like something that irks me because idk I know Curly is slow to act but he's not as like unopinionated as people make him out to be#like he does try to find solutions but they are still restricted at the end of the day by what PE provides them and I think his biggest c#crime is being in his own head too much and not giving Anya that emotional stability cause like idk man was he supposed to go to Home Depot#himself and install like padlocks? even if the let Anya sleep in medical after she pointed it out she was already pregnant at that point#like we arent seeing the inherent issue that no one not even Anya herself was thinking of the preventative measures because a)there was a#point nothing was happening that necessitated them b) it would've been the responsibility of PE to address them pre and post incident and c#there is only one person on the entire ship given the authority to do anything. You can not make multiple important choices in one instance#in such little time and Curly should not have had that total power like i think the most interesting thing in takes that really blame Curly#is that level of control they give him over the company. Like again i think about the three days we miss between the eval/party and the#convo/crash like i think people switch them around as if those scenes happen in succession when they are broken up and its heavily implied#Curly and Jimmy just havent been talking vs the depiction that she told him and for like three days Curly was just chummy despite the fact#Jimmy and him just had a blow out fight like the next time we assume they talk is during the crash sequence cause he honestly hangs#around Anya more which i think is really important because she trust Curly to defend her himself but not his judgement to give her somethin#to defend herself as she knows he believes her but also knows she's not seeing the danger the same and its heartbreaking and more
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Kraz, royal healer
Kraz (Razzy if they like you(but they like everyone)(except Jerry)) is a human (?) mage who voluntarily exiled themselves to the underground to follow monsterkind during the war. They are later appointed royal healer by the king and queen and has devoted themselves to the betterment of monster society ever since. They are the only human the royal scientist ever tolerated (although would you call sharing lab coats and beds tolerating or...something else?)
Information
-Species : mage (half monster, half human)
-Age : older than the barrier. As long as they will to live, it appears that a mage cannot age.
-Gender : apparently born a female, although it is unclear how sexual dimorphism develops in mages. Kraz does not specifically care.
-Soul : Green
-Height : 1.99m (6'5)
-Hair colour : Black (somehow iridescent ?)
-Eye colour : deep dark brown. Their sclera is grey as well.
-Build : sickly thin, actually skin and bones. They never eat much of anything, claiming that they do not need a lot of food. It worries people quite a lot, especially Toriel, but they have been like this for hundreds of years so... at least they're not dead ? Still, they scare the kids.
-Personnality : a sweet, calming presence. They exude an aura which makes anyone around them feel at peace. Although they are quite akward and generally anxious, they smile easily and brightly. Kraz is very friendly, caring, and kind to a fault. has quite an outdated manner of speech. A jokester. Always does their best to please people around them. Deeply devoted. Probably has some sort of attention deficit. Easily fascinated. Suffers from chronic bird behaviour (will bring you trinkets??).
-Likes : gardening, playing the piano, cooking, puzzles, collecting shiny trinkets, science, herbal medicine, cultivating bacteria, gift giving, late 1800's fashion, dark spaces, funny socks, Gaster.
-Dislikes : loud noises (especially clamoring crowds), being watched, sudden movements, bright reflective surfaces, small enclosed spaces, bitter foods.
Backstory
Kraz was born to a human mother and a monster father during the war, as mages often are. Abandoned by their mother, who could not endure the shame of their birth, they were taken under their father’s wing and raised amongst a small monster village. Early on, they manifested an extremely intense green soul and spectacular magical power, even for a mage. Although unequipped and unprepared to nurture such potential, the monsters in Kraz's community did their best to encourage the toddler's magical prowess, such as having them heal cuts and bruises, or speed up a few carrots' growth. But as war progressed, human armies swept through monster territory and eventually raided the child's village, pillaging and slaughtering everyone in their path. In these times mages were rare, being the product of monster-human relationships, but extremely sought after by humanity, who could only manifest minor magic potential. Stumbling upon the young Kraz and recognising in their physiology the traits of a "hybrid", human soldiers immediately identified them as a mage and took them away to be raised amongst humans. Their father, if he ever survived the attack, never stopped looking for his little bird until his dust settled on the ground. And so Kraz was raised in human war camps and settlements, amongst soldiers and other mages. Being so young, they only ever had vague memories of their time amongst monsters and soon put them to rest. As they grew, their healing powers grew with them, and it was soon clear to the commanders that Kraz may as well be the most spectacular healer that they had ever known, capable of rising men at death's door back on their feet and ready to fight in mere minutes. Suffice to say, as one of their greatest asset, they were sent from battlefield to battlefield, from division to division in order to rise the almost dead and reinforce the dwindling human forces. But they had a fault. Kraz, at their heart, was kind. Compassionate. Caring. And oh so, so young still, no more than fifteen. And the pain, the suffering inflicted by and to monsters broke their soul into pieces. See, despite all the propaganda, they could never quite bring themselves to hate monsters. Hate half of themselves. And so in the midst of the battle's confusion, in secret, they would slip a hand or a green bullet towards a bleeding frog here. A dusting lion there. They wished they could just run to them and pour their whole magic into the wounded, but the human soldiers watched them. Always. But eventually, as war was nearing its end, temptation was too great. They could take it no more. And so during a bloody battle, they slipped away from the soldiers surrounding them and ran to a fallen monster, who was already dusting away. A skeleton. The young mage fell to their knees, reaching for the monster's broken face with magic already at their fingertips and reassurances spilling from their lip, and poured everything they had left as the soldier tried to struggle and speak. He barely was able to call to them, in a language they didn't know, his bones just starting to reform, but fate is oh so cruel. Kraz could only slip their guard's attention for so long, and just as life started to flicker back in the man's face, they were torn off his bloodied body and promptly covered in his dust, their work undone by the fall of a sword. As the soldiers dragged the teen away, they could only claw down at the dusty floor to rack up the dust, and a nametag. Dingbats.
"Traitor", they were deemed. "An error of nature", "a freak", they were called. But a valuable freak nonetheless. Their magical abilities were still wholly unmatched through all of the land. They were needed. And so Kraz was beaten down, corrected, whipped back into shape. Into following orders. Royals spoke of banishment. Of a barrier. And they needed mages.
Finally, monsters were defeated. They were to be sealed underground. Kraz and the other mages assembled, staring down at a beaten monsterkind, a sea of eyes and bleeding hearts crying out at them as they chanted the words.
They couldn't do it. They couldn't.
They ran to them.
As the barrier rose up, this child fell to their knees in front of Asgore and Toriel and begged them to let them stay. To right this wrong. To help. They did.
And so Kraz poured their heart out. It wasn't easy, getting monsters to accept human help, even though they shared some physical traits. They slaved away for nothing in return, growing crops magically in dead ground and never taking even a grain of wheat for themselves. Endlessly imbuing water with their energy to create remedies for everyone. Only accepting the bare minimum of food to stay alive, even though they felt as if they were tearing this food away from the hands of the needy. They tried so, so hard to repair humanity's sins. Clear their name in the eyes of monsters.
And eventually, it somewhat worked. Instead of frowns, they were faced with smiles. Children stopped crying when they saw the healer's incomplete beak and started to spare them a smile. The elderly stopped refusing treatment from them. And even though they still had to face a seemingly unclimbable wall as they began further studies in medicine, biology and microbiology, chemistry, agricultural sciences, magical studies, anything to broaden their knowledge and help, they made it. (No thanks to the shy, awkward, standoffish and straight up rude engineering-chemistry-physics student which whom the king and queen pushed Kraz to hang out with. They said that it would "help the both of you, you kids would work beautifully together". Not that the mage minded, as a matter of fact they quite enjoyed his presence and always did their best to be agreeable and overall lovely company; but the skeleton never quite seemed to get over his absolute loathing of humans. Oh well, no matter. They'll keep trying anyways.). Eventually they did succeed and ascended to the position of "tolerable fellow student who I regularly hang out with" in the eyes of their adversary. When Kraz got their first doctorate, in medicine, WingDings even cracked a smile. And as the two completed their studies, the now mage-doctor was promoted to "acceptable collaborator". A win for the ages!
Kraz finally moved out of the derelict place they were practicing medicine in since the war to a more acceptable place (which was, well, their newly furnished house, courtesy of the royal family for their friendship and as a congratulatory gift for their doctorate) and kept working as always. But with an official title to strengthen their position, and what some may call a reluctant friend, things seemed lighter. Monsters were flocking to their office, business (which was still free but their patients insisted on leaving little somethings) was booming, their ties to their fellow "collaborator " deepening, and the doctor became sincerely appreciated in their community. Maybe not in all monsterdom yet, memories of the war never quite fading, but it was progress. Things were going well.
But it seemed that fate had other plans.
One day, plague broke out. The illness decimated monster populations, entire families perishing from an unknown condition.
And Kraz, oh Kraz, tried everything. Every spell, every potion, every cure they could think of. Nothing worked. They asked for help to the other healers, consulted with other scientists, even asked the engineers if they could think of something, anything. Nothing worked. They could only watch as the malady swept through monsters, powerless to watch them die, just like they did during the war.
No. No.
They would not stand for it, they would not STAND FOR THIS !! They will find a cure. At any cost.
They locked themselves in their laboratory.
One day. Two days.
Three days.
Six days.
Eight days.
Their colleagues had tried banging on the door, shouting at them to come out, to go home, they would not answer. They called for the doctor’s friends, to no avail. Eventually, it was WingDings Gaster, the royal scientist himself, to be at their door threatening them to “kick their feathery ass if it’s the last thing he does” in order to get them to open the damn door.
No answer.
But the royal scientist was a stubborn man. And when words failed, he proceeded to take the door’s security system apart and barge into the lab, only to be taken aback by the stench. He covered his non-existent nose with a sleeve and bit back the urge to let last night’s dinner see the light of day again, ushering the doctor’s worried coworkers away. It reeked of illness. It reeked of plague. The skeleton, being the only one without lungs and hence immune to all airborne diseases, made his way through the mess of papers, vials and…patches of blood and hair…to the form bent over his friend’s table. Kraz was staring straight at him with their big, beady dark eyes which seemed to be glazed over. They looked even paler than they usually do, which is to say whiter than snow, and seemed so frail that they could snap at any moment. Their face was also swimming in what seemed to be bloodied spit, over a mountain of papers scribbled with words that made no sense. Suffice to say, they looked like death itself. They looked dead.
It was as if Gaster’s bones were made of ice. Barely thinking, he grabbed his friend’s limp body, by Asgore were they TALL, and zapped away somewhere safe. Somewhere clean. His place, apparently.
He cleaned Kraz. Changed them. Laid them in bed. Listened to their delirious babbles, relieved that at least they were alive. In a moment of clarity, the doctor pleaded him to retrieve some instruments from their lab and conduct a series of tests on samples of their blood, which he was urged to collect daily.
“I need to help them Dings. Please. Please, I beg of you, do this for them. Or else I would have done this for nothing. Please.”
Eventually, the unthinkable happened. They got better, the little colour their cheeks normally had returned. As soon as the healer could walk again, they were out of their friend’s house and back in their lab (ignoring everyone’s admonishments). Barely a week later, there was a cure for the seemingly incurable plague.
Monsterkind was saved.
And everything was truly fine. Kraz was promoted to Royal Doctor (a fact they endlessly teased Gaster with, because Now you can’t boss me around anymore mister science man), was granted a whole department in the Hotland labs, and was now revered though the kingdom! Their promotion to head doctor was also accompanied by another, to the exclusive rank of “beloved special stupid idiot who gave themselves the plague” in the soul of a certain someone. They weren’t going to live that one down anytime soon. But well, when the royal scientist’s coworkers noticed that his lunch was packed daily in the common room fridge with “Do not forget nourishment today dear, I will see you tonight at our usual, -A stupid idiot “stuck to it, let’s say that the air in the Core labs was decidedly more pleasant. And Alphys, a young intern that the Doctor befriended during one of their numerous visits to their collaborator-friend-lover(?), could barely contain her gushing to anyone that might listen.
Yes. Times were good.
Until a human fell.
#undertale oc#character sheet#Kraz#YIPEE FINALLY DONE!!!#I am so so excited to get you guys know them better#I'm still trying to define their personnality precisely but I've been thinking about them FOREVER#their lore is a little insane but. They're weird too.#Literally a bird. Has bird behaviour SO BAD#I'll draw them doing stupid shit dont worry. Bringing Gaster beads and stuff. A lover's offering.#They look scary as hell but actually they're a big softie. Very silly and kind person.#The giganormous half beak giant height and skeleton apearance just don't help#I love them.#permission from/to my mutuals to draw razzy interracting with your guys ?#(if i ever have time to draw lmao)#they're dating the royal scientist because I need to kiss that goop man personally#their relationship is science x science (different flavours) they're the worst lmao#kraz is the only seemingly responsible one#they have this self care thing nailed (forces Gaster to eat and shower)#date night is either gaster building something and kraz doing the very meticulous bits or running tests on razzy's new bacteria farm#“Can you make a bacteria that tastes like tomato sauce” well a week and a half later apparently yes you can#these two i swear#Kraz wears funny socks and Gaster funny ties. The funny sciences.#my art#my oc
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#??????????????????#????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????#i dont know what to doooooooooooo i dont know what to do w my life.....#i dont wanna go to college im way too stupid for that and also its insane like#im scared i dont like anything enough to make it worth it. not even biology#thats like 5 years idk and i fucking hate school.... i think id kill myself if i had to go back to somerhing remotely similar#idk thats scary.....#my plan b was getting a job and i rlly tried but im a pussy . i only started to go out and do stuff like last year. and im an adult !!#i feel like i fucked something up at some point in my life cuz like this is insane#im stuck in limbo. like theres something wrong and its not the autism#bites a cinderblock bites a cinderblock#man im so fucking scared everyday i feel like im going insane . i cant even imagine me doing anything#theres something wrong w me cuz thats like not normal . i dont wanna die in my bed but everything else scares me#fucked up if true#uh#vent#its funny af tagging my posts w vent but i tag them so u can block them or whatever#FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKK IF ONLY REDBULL ACTUALLY DID SHIT TO ME . THEN ID BE FIXED#FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCKKKKKKKKKKK I JUST WANT AN ENERGY DRINK THAT WORKS PLEASEEEEEEEEEEE PLEASE GOD#PLEASE PEKASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE
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starting to kind of date someone right before christmas is so stressful fr. do i get him a gift or what we've been on two dates but i'm seeing him tonight n it's christmas eve.....but what if he didn't get me anything then it will be weird.....
#i planned to try to find something small enough that i could easily carry around concealed then take it out if he got something for me#but the thing i got ened up being a bit too big for that lol#im gonna bring a big bag of gifts for all my friends maybe and then it won't be weird idk#by some miracle my mom showed me a bag of emergency gifts for the girlies and i was like cool im taking all of them tonight 😂#which was not what she intended lol#but im gonna do it#if i had time i would have gotten him something different but its good enough#he mentioned a book he hadn't read last night so would have been cool the got him that but its too late its a music hat now#if he even got me anything idk#but he specifically told me he was last minute christmas shopping so idk#i am over analyzing this for sure tho#anyway most unrealistic part of christmas romance movies is they're not anxious wondering whether to gift or not to gift#also im lowkey scared abt new years 😳#not that i wouldn't like to kiss him probably but i already have a hard time looking at him without blushing 😂#so that would make it 10000x worse lmao#also idk if i want to kiss him JUST bc its new years instead of waiting for the right moment to just happen? idk i dont wanna rush things#its not for sure we'll be together at midnight on new years idk what his plans are#but we'll see#anyway things are going well but moving faster than expected 😅#also not 100% sure i'm seeing him tonight and def not tomorrow so that might take the gift pressure off but idk#waiting to hear back abt tonight#😐😐😐#also idk why we waited until we were both on break from work to do stuff bc honestly every time we've met it's been after work hours anyway#however it allows us to stay up later than on work nights which is nice#he didn't leave my house until after 11 last night lol#anyway trying hard not to get swept up in all this while its new but fr im like oh this is what it's supposed to feel like 🥺#never been in love before every relationship i've had was awk and forced was starting to think maybe im just not capable of love#but literally cuddling on the couch watching it's a wonderful life last night i was like hm i'm definitely capable of love actually#not saying im actually there yet but it would be soooo easy to fall for this guy which is p scary actually#esp bc im not sure it would work for other reasons
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Another magical girl au design? its more likely than you think
#dndads#dungeons and daddies#my art#normal oak#link li wilson#taylor swift dndads#scary marlowe#dndads magical girl au#gonna hopefully color these soon#was gonna make something with the adult designs but that wasnt working rn so i decided to be self endulgant#prepare for a rant btw because as always i put wayy too much thought into clothing and symbolism#i have a lot of like doodles of this with my shitty handwriting if anyone wants to see that#hopefully i will get to do actually finale related stuff soon#i mean this is slightly finale adjecent because these are like final forms of them#taylors sword is a sword of darkness btw#taylor sucks to draw as always i hate drawing him >:[ hes so difficult to get right#anyway rant over hope someone apart from me likes these
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It's always interesting to hear about people's weird/unexpected "alternate life paths". Like, something that you could have done with your life, a job you almost took, a school you almost went to, etc - that was still actually realistic enough that it could have happened, but NOW it seems to not suit your current personality.
Like for example, I currently hate advertising (how manipulative it is, brands trying to be 'relatable', social media amplifying it to an obnoxious extreme, etc.) so much that even seeing a little ad before a youtube video is grating to even witness, but there was a point in time where I was genuinely seriously considering going into marketing/making commercials as a career lol. Or like, I have a relative who was very inclined to be a pastor when they were younger, even though today they're a super strong atheist, etc. etc.
#BECAUSE I knew I really liked filming and editing things and doing set design and costume design (from having done little bits of that#here and there in media classes and my own stuff - i used to be a lot more into making videos than I am now). BUT I was always thinking#that a movie is WAAY to big and long. even a short film. So I was trying to think of ways I could still like#have the fun of scouting locations to film and dressing up actors and etc. etc. without it having to be a Huge Million Dollar Production#on tv show or movie level. SO then I was thinking about like... just doing commercials. Or music videos. Like shorter things where I still#get the fun of the filming and everything but it's less of an intensive long term project.#So there is an alternate version of me (I suppose if i somehow did not end up having physical and mental health issues#as badly somehow.. or like.. randomly came into wealth and was able to pay my way through a nice college despite missing#days constantly being out because I'm sick or something lol) that works in some corporate advertising office coming up with commercials#and directing or filming them or doing the sets for them or something in that general vicinity.#I also was considering being a corporate psychologist. or whatever its called.. oh from google:#''Industrial and organizational (I/O) psychologists study and assess individual group and organization dynamics in the workplace''#I don't think I even knew what the job entailed. I was at the time just thinking like.. the type of person that comes into a business offic#and gives everyone personality assessments or does MBTI or big-5 testing crap for whatever reason that some businesses get that#done for people. Really i just wanted to be in a Corporate Big Office setting yet still do psychology. Because I used to be really fixated#on living in a big city. Like the ideas of everything being walkable. picking up a coffee in the morning. walking to my job in a Big#Skyscraper Building. people watching in a huge hotel lobby for lunch. flying frequently (I love airplanes and airports aesthetically).#living in an apartment with a giant window overlooking the city. etc. etc. BUT that was before i had really BEEN to a city. Then I actually#hung around a city a few times and went places and I was like... AUGh... The Sensory Overwhelm.. cars people lights loudness noise scary#everything happening all at once. etc. etc. (though even when I wanted to live in a city i NEVER strove for the Night Life. when i say I#enjoy city imagery I mean like... in the day time. Many people who like cities talk about The Night Life and post pictures of cities all#lit up at night and clubs and dancing and restaurants. none of that EVER appealed to me. perhaps a sign I am not a real city person. Like#I am NOT standing in a crowded bar full of loud people in the middle of the night lol.. get AWAY from me!!) but I do adore the#architecture of like bright white clean sterile modern spaces like huge airport lobbies or malls or etc. I think thats what reminded me of#city and what I liked about the idea of that life. Like I always LOVED the layout of schools and hospitals and trainstations and public#transport in general. Though even then I knew enough that I would not be a good architect/city planner. so I guess my adoration for those#spaces was merely to be channeled into LIVING there. but then I realized I didn't even really want to do that that much. I mean I still#definitely aim to live NEAR a city. like the little areas outside of it. I would never live in a rural place 4 hours from anything. I liter#ally just COULDNT since I need close access to hospitals sometimes lol. But I used to want to live in the CENTER of citites like high rise#condo. and now I'm like.... eh....... perhaps a smaller quieter walkable space nearby lol.. ANYWAY.. alternate me in my Business Suit eheh
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