#like I was a substance overuser

[granolagal]

I'm trying to be so graceful and everything (I am generally speaking deeply ungraceful and I'm nearing acceptance of this) but I am not enjoying watching my hair grey it is not. Something I'm finding easy actually. And in my teens and early twenties I was all ooooh yea actually I can't wait to have some grey hairs ha ha. Very edgy of me and stuff, very cool and interesting and artful of me and everything, but actually. I don't love it and I would like to love it but it's just not quite panning out that way

[mariasont]

Lip Gloss - S.R

a/n: wow this is really short and i feel like i overuse the lip gloss shtick but

masterlist

‧₊˚ ✩°｡⋆♡ ⋆˙⟡♡ ⋆˙⟡♡⋆｡°✩˚₊‧

pairings: spencer reid x bimbo!receptionist!reader

summary: in which spencer really likes your sparkly lip gloss

warnings: none? fluff

wc: 0.5k

Pink. Sparkles. Lip gloss. Those were the only thoughts running through Spencer's mind as he walked into the break room. Which this was a surprise to him because usually his mind was running a mile a minute--mathematical equations, book references, and case theories. But when you were near that was all reduced to a heaping pile of nothing. Especially now, as you leaned casually against the counter, in pink pumps and matching skirt that definitely wasn't up to the dress code, but he wasn't sure if you cared.

Cradled between your hands was a white mug, its side inscribed with the words 'Britney survived 2007. You can handle today' in stark black letters. He had no idea what it meant, but he noticed it was your favorite, a staple in your daily routine, unless it found its way to the top self, an inconvenience Spencer would subtly always rectify when he went to pour his own cup.

The focal point of his attention, however, was your lips, more precisely, the sheer layer of shimmering gloss that clung to them. Words were forming on those same lips, presumably directed at him, but they seemed to dissolve before reaching his ears, his gaze transfixed by the glistening movement of your mouth.

"Huh?"

With a smile, you pressed your glittering lips together and took a step in his direction. He managed to clear his throat, trying to redirect his attention to your eyes, but his gaze remained helplessly planted.

"I swear, half my routine is just reapplying this stuff after every sip," you said while your thumb worked diligently to wipe away the sparkling smudge from the mug.

"Considering the non-Newtonian fluid dynamics of the lip gloss's polymeric substances, which exhibit both viscous and elastic properties, it leads to a higher propensity for adhesion and cohesion on substrates with varying thermal coefficients."

Your fingers absentmindedly toyed with your earlobe as you cocked your head, a bemused furrow forming above your eyes, but your smile remained undiminished.

"Sorry, that went right over my head," you laughed, nose scrunching in the process. "But it's sweet of you to assume I caught all that."

"Oh, sorry, well, lip gloss is made of oils and waxes that give it that shiny appearance. However, these ingredients don't fully absorb to your skin, so when you press your lips against something, like a hot coffee cup, the excess transfers over."

Heat suffused his face as he registered the unwavering attention you afforded him, as if you were hanging on his every syllable. He sensed your struggle to comprehend, but your effort was evident. He really liked having your attention.

"So, with all that brainpower, do you have any tips for keeping my gloss on my lips instead of my mug?"

"Maybe a straw?"

Your laughter was like music to his ears, filling his senses as your hand, perfectly manicured, lightly touched his arm. A rush of warmth flooded his neck, and he looked at you, momentarily lost for words, as you murmured, "I'll try that out, thanks, Dr. Reid."

"Spencer," he corrects.

"Right, well, thank you, Spencer," you said, standing on tiptoes to plant a kiss on his cheek, before twirling on your heels, your smile lingering in the air.

Spencer could feel the stickiness on his skin, his fingers pressing against the spot you had left, feet glued to the ground. He starting to think he really likes lip gloss. 

[arthursfuckinghat]

So, I've been wondering something.

In red dead online, there isn't too much use for Dead Eye because it doesn't/can't slow time down since you're playing on a server. It's still a powerful skill if you work on the upgrades for it, but one thing I noticed a lot (because I rarely use Dead Eye in online mode) is that your character really doesn't like having a low Dead Eye meter.

As in, your character will cover their eyes and scrunch up their face and wince as if they've got a bad headache (this goes for playing in story mode too). Now I know they're just visual cues for the player to see and be able to tell that the Dead Eye is low (because your aim is much worse with low Dead Eye), but the implications are pretty interesting to me.

So the question is, does having low Dead Eye hurt and why?

We know that both Dead Eye and Eagle Eye are learned skills, and things like cigarettes, cigars, chewing tobacco, alcohol, snake oil and cheese all benefit your Dead Eye when it's low. It's a crucial meter, just like your heath or stamina - which raises more questions in itself.

Dead Eye and Eagle Eye are fascinating to me because they're very valuable abilities that can be used at will, and have specific set limits for how long they can be used at a time.

But only Dead Eye needs regular sustenance, or "feeding" I suppose.

This gives me the impression that Dead Eye is constantly dormant, instead of something that's "turned on" when needed. Like a constant state of being on high alert that's running on the sidelines of your character's day to day life.

When your character hasn’t used Dead Eye for a while and it still drains, it could mean their brain is struggling to maintain that high level of alertness in the background. This constant readiness, or the potential to drop into Dead Eye at any moment, would be like someone constantly being on high alert in real life. Even if they don’t act on it, the strain of staying ready for danger builds up.

Dead Eye uses an almost superhuman level of focus and precision. To enter that state of hyper awareness where time seems to slow down (even if it's just the perception of it), your character's brain might be working much harder than usual, forcing the mind into overdrive. Just like overusing muscles leads to physical fatigue, overworking the brain through intense focus could lead to mental exhaustion and physical symptoms, like headaches or vision problems.

And since Dead Eye depletes like a stamina bar and requires nourishment (cigarettes, alcohol, cheese), the skill could be linked to the body’s energy resources. Using Dead Eye probably increases your character's heart rate, sharpens reflexes, and probably even increases adrenaline production, which are all very taxing on the body.

Which makes sense as to why things like tobacco and alcohol help replenish it.

Stimulants like nicotine or the rush from alcohol might help keep that mental sharpness in check or at least alleviate the strain. It's as if the brain needs to be sharpened or soothed with substances because it's working overdrive in the background, even when you’re not actively engaging with Dead Eye.

So if we treat Dead Eye as something that affects the brain’s chemistry, like sharpening focus and precision, it could also deplete certain neurochemicals or hormones over time (adrenaline, dopamine, etc). Tobacco or alcohol might simulate the release of chemicals that help regulate those abilities. The discomfort your character feels when Dead Eye is low could well be on the same level as withdrawal symptoms, where the brain is craving more of those chemicals to return to its state of super focus.

I mean, what a fucking fascinating concept right?

Dead Eye is solely tied to heightened awareness for life or death situations, focusing entirely on people who can fight back and threaten your life. So while you're using it, you're engaging with targets that could potentially harm you, and that’s why it probably has such a taxing effect. Your mind and body are fully ramped up for combat, for precision, and for survival. It’s essentially a battle skill, designed for quick, decisive violence.

You also gain Dead Eye points for killing people, so you're not just using this dangerous skill, you're learning every time you use it and kill with it.

From a world building pov, this really deepens characters like Arthur or any other Dead Eye users. They're not just "good with guns" - they're managing the toll that comes with honing such a deadly skill. And unlike Eagle Eye, which is more of a passive, less draining ability, Dead Eye seems to tap into something more intense and unsustainable. Which is really fitting for their lifestyle.

Eagle Eye is taught through patience and understanding of the natural world, Dead Eye is forged in fire and the result of a life steeped in bloodshed and conflict.

[updatingranboo]

tips and tricks for ranboo fans to make chat (and the community) a better place!

hello! since the rebrand is coming up i decided i wanted to make a list of certain things ranboo fans should be discouraged from saying/doing, to keep chat/the community fun and keep from pushing ranboo back into the box of a streamer they no longer are. i personally don’t believe in cringe culture, i think everyone should be able to have fun, but at this point certain jokes and comments restrict ranboo from growing as a person and do reflect on the community. this got a lot longer than i was expecting, apologies! lets begin.

gender jokes (“genderman”, you stole my gender etc)

a super obvious one. getting gender envy from ranboo is normal and super awesome! nothing wrong with that. but the jokes have been overused. the genderman one specifically has ties to minecraft which, while ranboo doesn’t care about being associated with minecraft, it’s still a tie to their past content they would prefer to leave behind. this is the same level as calling them an “mcyt”, while there’s no harm in it and ranboo really doesn’t care, it’s also just.. not really true anymore and hasn’t been for years. let them grow!

2. *blank*boo/general spam

*blank*boo is nothing but spammy. all it does is fill up chats and replies and brings no substance to anything. spamming “tiredboo” when they yawn, “madboo” when they yell etc. is not contributing anything meaningful to a chat. it’s annoying and drowns out actually fun and interesting comments. as for general spam, you can use a few emotes here and there! but when all you do is spam emotes it again just floods the chat. when ranboo tells chat to stop spamming, you stop. don’t take it as a challenge, you will just get banned. yes there is delay, but you can see what other people in chat are saying too. spamming lag, telling them they missed a dono, anything where you find yourself repeating what other people are saying to either get their attention or just because (except for using bttv emotes) just don’t. i know most people are used to speaking in a fast chat, but the truth is chat doesn’t have to be fast! if you don’t have anything to say, you can just stay quiet. even spamming the PETTHEMODS emote defeats the purpose !!

3. telling off chat

slightly related, you don’t have to tell off chat either. going “chat stop” “oh my god chat” just adds to the spam. change the subject! ignore the spam and let the mods take care of it. focus on reacting to the stream and being silly, not being backseat mods.

4. the swearing obsession

ranboo is almost 20. they make so many innuendos every stream. they are heavily considering adding a mature warning to most streams from here on out, and as we have seen they no longer are the “family friendly” kid who they used to be. he can say shit and fuck and people can be normal about it. you don’t have to say LANGUAGE or go THEY SWORE ?????? he’s an adult and can swear. all of his friends swear and a huge portion of us in the community do too. it is not a big deal

5. telling ranboo what to do

back seating in video games, as well as in other situations when it’s NOT ASKED FOR is not fun. let ranboo do what they want. this applies to just general things too- you don’t need to tell ranboo to go to sleep. they can make that decision themself. again, he’s almost 20.

6. assuming ranboo is uncomfortable with something

it’s always good to be careful about respecting boundaries! but don’t confuse your own boundaries for theirs. ranboo has said many times that if something bothers him, he’ll talk about it! it’s safe to say they are more uncomfortable with you harassing an artist for drawing something you personally don’t like, over the actual art itself.

7. the chat hopping/mentioning ranboo unnecessarily

we all love ranboo. that is very obvious. their friends love them too! but when you go into one of ranboos friends chats or comment sections and start either asking about ranboo, telling his friends to play with them, or making unnecessary references to their content, it makes their friends want to do things with them less! streamers are their own people. there’s nothing wrong with watching one of ranboo’s friends streams because ranboo is there, i do it all the time. a lot of us do. the biggest thing is to be RESPECTFUL to the person who’s stream you are watching. if you chat, chat to the streamer! you don’t have to mention ranboo. or, just stay out of chat if you don’t think you’ll be able to stay on topic. you don’t have to speak in chat! there is the flip side of this, don’t bring up other streamers in ranboos chat unnecessarily either! no one cares if you saw two colors and it made you think of something unrelated. it’s so disrespectful to the streamer to do this.

8a. unnecessary negativity

the internet can be a very negative, reactionary place. seeking out negativity just for the sake of an argument is unhealthy and can also expose others to arguments that they wouldn’t have had to see. bait, obvious unchanging bigots, and also people who just don’t like ranboo (which is valid!) don’t need to be engaged. in the case of trolls, bait and bigots, they only bring negativity and are there to cause arguments. don��t give them the attention they want. As for people who just don’t like ranboo, you can leave them be too! Not everyone has to like ranboo. he can handle it, you don’t need to defend him or try and change someone’s mind. now, unnecessary negativity does not equal call outs/criticism!

8b. please criticize !

if something happens in the community, or from ranboo directly that hurts you or makes you uncomfortable, don’t be afraid to say something and help make us all better people! ranboo wants criticism. if it’s purely in the community, try reaching out to the other person first! often things can be settled privately so as to not hurt others by dragging them into the conversation or making things heated and causing people to attack each other. on the other side of this, if you see criticism from someone and feel the need to defend ranboo: don’t. if you are affected by something (ie. you are a person of color and the topic is racism) feel free to add to the conversation! if you do not have an opinion on something (ie lesbians call out lesbiphobia, and you are straight) keep it to yourself. let the people actually affected by something talk and have an opinion, and support them. it may feel like people are “attacking” ranboo (or you!) but they are not. they are real people with real, valid feelings, who want to feel safe in a community when in real life, they may be constantly victims of horrible things. listen first. if you still have your own opinions, reflect on them and why you feel the way you do, and dissect any implicit bias you may have. these are all important things that keep a community safe, happy, and mutually respectful!

ranboo encourages everyone to be good people and use common sense. remember when you say something, people other than ranboo see it too! every account has a person behind it, so treat each other with respect and help make the community a more fun and safe place for everyone to be in. ranboo has no tolerance for bigotry, racism, misogyny, antisemitism, ableism, and so on. remember to be aware of the things you are saying, and if you don’t know why something is wrong, look it up or try asking someone politely!

thank you for taking the time to read all of this! this list is non exhaustive. there are plenty of other things you can do in the community to make this a better place, from uplifting the minorities in the community more, to supporting artists by reblogging/sharing and commenting on their art, and more. at the end of the day though we are here because we love ranboo, so by following guidelines like these and putting in the effort, you show ranboo and the other people in the community you care and make everyone proud.

that’s all for now! keep boobing!

[toxicpineapple]

writing tips masterpost

hello to my loyal tumblr followers... i am often asked to give writing advice but usually when people ask me this i'm nooooot completely sure what to say despite having a ton of advice to give. it's such a broad question when there are so many different things i can advise on, right? so i thought i'd make a sort of writing advice masterpost where i can compile the tips that i think people specifically in fandoms could benefit the most from hearing, OR that i wish someone had told me when i was still finding my footing as a writer.

hopefully this will be helpful to you. i am putting all of the advice under a read more since this is going to be a long one. let's roll!

✬ paragraph breaks are your friend

the fastest way to get me to stop reading a fic is if i click in and see that there are NO paragraphs made and the entire piece is in a huge block of text. no matter how good your work is, i just can't read it at that point. the giant paragraph makes me get lost, i can't focus on anything... it's a huge no.

the trick is you want your paragraphs to sort of act as a guide for your reader, taking them through the story, keeping them engaged. do not be afraid to do short paragraphs! i can understand wanting to shy away from one or two sentence paragraphs for fear of not having "enough substance" in your work, but the truth is, a thousand short paragraphs is ten times easier to read than a huge block of text.

realistically, you want to have a good amount of variety in your paragraph length. variety is key. readers will notice when your work gets formulaic, and some people will like that, but for others that can turn people away from your work. but don't force it! a paragraph should end at the end of a statement, or if the paragraph is getting too long then cut off the thought and continue in the next paragraph with a transitional phrase.

as a general rule of thumb, you want lines of dialogue by different speakers to be put in separate paragraphs. you also want to avoid doing huge chunks of narration or exposition in the same paragraph as you introduce a new speaker. just make a new paragraph! no big deal. i guarantee you your reader will be way more engaged and nobody is going to come at you for doing more rather than less.

✬ make sure the reader knows who is speaking and when

you don't have to end off every line of dialogue with "she said" and in fact i would really recommend you don't. but you ALWAYS need to have some kind of indication in the text as to who is speaking, otherwise the reader can get lost.

this doesn't necessarily mean that you always have to explicitly say who is saying what, though. if it is obvious in a scene who is saying something -- so for example, a scene where there are only two characters talking OR the dialogue has some kind of phrase, statement, etc that makes it obvious who the speaker is -- then in that case you can just let the dialogue speak for itself. sometimes in writing less can be more. you disrupt the flow of a scene if you start to exposit unnecessarily when the reader could reasonably work something out for themself.

✬ "said" is your friend too

related to the last piece of advice, here's another note: don't shy away from using the word "said".

don't overuse it, either. obviously, you don't want every single line to be "he says" "she says" back and forth, especially when they might be asking questions or shouting, in which case the word "said" probably isn't all that applicable at all. but it's a nice default. if you catch yourself busting out the thesaurus, my recommendation? quit it. just use said. it's not going to hurt you and the reader isn't going to mind.

but yeah, in the event that a character is raising their voice, whispering, inquiring -- there are tons of other words you can use in lieu of said and then an adverb. it's just context-dependent, and also, you don't really want to lean too far one way or another. like i said, variety is key. too much of the same breaks immersion.

✬ if you wouldn't say it yourself, probably don't use it in writing

another related tip. look, i get it. you want to spruce up your writing with synonyms. but the fact of the matter is that a lot of these words that "mean the same thing" on paper actually have wildly differing connotations and if you don't understand what those are you're going to look kind of silly whipping out a word you just found off the internet. we can usually tell, too.

your vocabulary will naturally grow and expand as you continue to read and learn. you don't have to try and force it to seem smarter in your writing. people who can write compelling prose and dialogue without throwing in fancy words they barely understand look a lot more intelligent than people who have a thesaurus at the ready 24/7.

✬ if there's a simpler way to say it, take it

this one can be sort of style-dependent, so if it's not your cup of tea then feel free to take or leave this tip, but in my opinion, taking a whole seven-line paragraph to describe a simple action wastes both your and the readers' time.

how many times have you read a fic where the main characters are having a conversation with these long rambling paragraphs between lines of dialogue? sometimes this makes sense! if you were writing a death note fic it would absolutely make sense for light or L to be pausing every few seconds to carefully analyse their opponent's move... but that's not always the case. sometimes characters are just making small talk.

i'm not saying you can't show off. you should show off where applicable. but there's a time and place. sometimes a scene benefits more from you taking the easy way to describe something and moving on. flowery language is great, but if you're meandering too much the reader will lose interest and attention.

✬ a metaphor is useless if nobody knows what it means

writing is subjective and highly personal. write for yourself first and foremost, and use the metaphors that feel right to you -- but the best metaphorical pieces, to me, are the ones that people can understand and identify with.

you've read a story like that, haven't you? with a reoccurring theme or motif that comes back into play at the end in a way that makes you feel so satisfied and complete? THAT'S what you aim for with literary devices like that. if you write a story that nobody can understand, with metaphors that just don't make any sense -- then you haven't really successfully told a good story, have you?

i understand wanting to have a magnum opus. i think it's easy to fall into the "misunderstood writer" mindset where you want your pieces to be so magnificent that only the likeminded will get it -- but writing is a form of communication. metaphor is just another means with which we can illustrate how we feel. you WANT your readers to understand what you're doing with the metaphors, you WANT the people who step away from your story to know what you were trying to say. you don't have to be obvious, just make it good. make it something that can be reasonably drawn from the text.

at the end of the day flowery language is just flowery language. that doesn't actually make your story good.

✬ grammar intermission

(.) period/full stop: used at the end of sentences. oftentimes not used at the end of sentences in dialogue, because lines of dialogue are considered a fragment of a larger sentence. use a period/full stop at the end of a line of dialogue if the dialogue is followed up by another complete sentence. example:

"i just went to the store," he said, scratching his head.

"i just went to the store." he scratched his head.

(,) comma: used in the middle or to separate different clauses (parts/sections) of sentences. used for incomplete clauses, AKA sections of the sentence that could not function as individual sentences. also used to indicate a slight pause. example:

she reached for the ripest banana, plucking it from the bunch.

a comma can also be replaced by a conjunction like "and" or "but". example:

she reached for the ripest banana and plucked it from the bunch.

(;) semi colon: used to separate different complete clauses in sentences, AKA sections of the sentence that are related but COULD function individually as their own sentences. example:

he sighed as he looked out the window; it had been so long since he stepped outside.

not to be confused with

(:) colon: used at the end of a line that leads into or introduces another line. example:

his fingers drummed restlessly against the window sill. it was finally happening: he was finally leaving this place.

(-) hyphen: used to connect compound words like three-years-old or hyphenated surnames like jones-smith.

(–) en dash: used to indicate ranges of time or distance, like 3–4 hours.

(—) em dash: a girl's best friend. slash j. but an em dash is used to indicate a few different things: an abrupt end to a thought or sentence, a "cut-in" where you interject something tangentially or unrelated before returning to the original thought, or a diversion in the sentence/thought. examples:

"no, listen, you don't understand—"

he scowled—an ugly look on his usually handsome features—and told her to be quiet.

it's not like she had wanted it to go that way—but when had it ever mattered what she wanted?

(()) parentheses: used to add additional context, information, or a semi-unrelated thought that would break the flow of an ongoing sentence without completely taking the reader out. example:

"no, i'm sorry. i just forgot to call you this morning," he said, looking away. (in truth, he'd sat by the phone for fifteen minutes trying to psyche himself into it, but hadn't been able to muster the courage.)

✬ show don't tell, and tell don't show

show don't tell is one of the classic pieces of writing advice that i do, often, think is correct -- but it's a little more nuanced than just never telling your readers what a character is thinking. you want the work to speak for itself without you implanting messages or themes into the reader's brain. at the same time though you don't want them to be doing too much work because it breaks immersion.

this ties into what i was saying above about simpler being better sometimes. you want to be concise especially in scenes that might call for it. a fight scene should be quick and snappy. no need to dig into the physical sensation of being enraged -- just say the character is pissed! but if a character is having a meltdown or panicking, you can get SO much more out of describing how that feels than just outright saying it.

✬ remember your perspective

another huge thing with show don't tell is that you don't want your character to be able to objectively say what everyone else is thinking and feeling -- unless that makes sense for them within the context of the story. really dig into it. DOES the character have a reason to know what their opponents, friends, etc are thinking? how well do they know the other characters? how attentive are they to the emotions of those around them?

it's better to focus on descriptions than labels in that case. say what face a character is making, describe their body language or tone. your character can have impressions, just make it clear that those ARE their impressions. and let your character be wrong! they do not have to be a completely objective source of information.

✬ when it comes to representation, if you aren't confident you can do it well, don't do it at all

i'm one of those people who's kind of of the opinion that white or cishet or otherwise systemically advantaged people have no place being the loudest voices in conversations about representation, least of all AS the representatives. if you are someone with systemic privilege and you choose to portray someone who is oppressed -- that's not necessarily a bad thing. but you need to be willing to do your research and have a sensitivity reader, and you have to be ready for people to say you did it wrong.

not much else to be said about that. your voice on the matter isn't actually all that important. there are people from the demographics involved who DO have stories to tell about themselves that will be MUCH more valuable than your perception of them, so it's honestly better to just let them tell it. that's how i feel.

✬ don't break the rules unless you know how to follow them. in other words, your rebellion should be obvious

a lot of times i see people breaking grammar or other rules and citing "stylistic" choices as their reasons why. which is all good and well, to an extent -- but you want it to be very clear that you ARE breaking the rules on purpose in a way that adds to the artistic merit of your piece.

if you don't know the rules, then it really just comes across like messy work. you both have to know how to apply the rules, and also how to break them in a stylistically significant way. if it doesn't make sense for the rules to be broken, if it says nothing... it's honestly better to just follow them. that's my take.

✬ don't be scared of names and pronouns

i said before that you want variety in your work, and that is very very true -- but it's also true that certain words like names, pronouns, etc will sort of blend into the background in writing. people don't notice them. that means if you're using a name or pronoun a lot in a scene to make it clear who exactly is being referred to...

hey. look into my eyes. breathe. it's okay. you do not have to resort to highlighting arbitrary characteristics of the characters. i know. just breathe. it's okay. use their names. they have them for a reason. it's all good.

this isn't to say that you SHOULDN'T do that, just do it when it makes sense to. if height is something the characters are noticing then use "the shorter boy". if age is relevant, eye colour, hair colour, whatever -- go ahead and use them. but don't be excessive with it. i should not be having to read the bluenette more than i'm reading shuichi's actual goddamn name.

✬ read

this is the huge one. reading other works informs your writing. it teaches you skills and tricks you can use. it helps expand your dialogue and your world view. it might even highlight to you things you do too much of in your own writing. read, all the time, whenever you can. it doesn't have to be books. it can be fanfic, articles, whatever -- just keep reading, because you will be passively absorbing knowledge during that time and it'll help you grow as a writer.

✬ practice

BOOOOOO TOMATO TOMATO TOMATO! SHE SAID THE THING SHE SAID IT!

but listen, it's literally just true. i write almost every day for at least a couple of hours and i have been on a trend of consistent growth for the past five years. go read my fics from 2019 if you don't believe me. i've grown fast and i've grown constantly. you just DO grow through constant practice, even if it doesn't always seem that way.

not only that, but you start to build confidence too. writing a lot helps develop those muscles to a point where you start to realise that you ARE that good and you DO have that dawg in you. or whatever. you just have to keep at it. you're not going to magically improve thinking for six months about how you want to be a better writer without practicing anything about it.

✬ yeah, betas are good

you want to have a good editor. i know that that can feel like having someone ELSE be the reason your piece is good, but that's genuinely not it. a beta reader is a second pair of eyes on your work, someone who can tell you about the issues and mistakes you're missing. they'll tell you when something doesn't make sense. they'll point out your punctuation errors. you don't NEED to have a good editor for every crummy little oneshot... but it's good to have one.

✬ numbers are fine and all but don't compare yourself to other people

i think almost everyone in some kind of creative pursuit wants to get some kind of acknowledgement for it. we want to be the best we can be, and it can be discouraging to receive utterly no validation along the way! i get it!!

just don't get caught up in crunching the numbers. you are not as good as your fanbase is. you alone know your skillset and you absolutely should not say "well this other writer got THIS much attention" because that'll just wear you down. it really will. external validation will only keep you going for so long, and you'll always end up needing more. you HAVE to build your own personal confidence first or you'll crash and burn.

✬ read your writing out loud

there is no quicker way to see if something is wonky in your prose than reading it out loud and seeing if it makes sense verbally. i highly recommend this to anybody who struggles with sentence flow. it's a good one.

✬ yippee hooray!

🥰 and that's what i've got for now. thank you if you made it this far, please take all these tips as you will, it is all subjective of course, these are just the tips that help Me the most when i sit down to write something.

please feel free to ask me for additional advice (on specific topics if you could!) at any time, i love encouraging new writers and i am passionate about writing so i will gladly offer support in any way i can, including beta reading works for anybody who might need that.

take care now 💖

[handofmidas-writes]

I didn't hate season 4. Or the love triangle. Let me explain.

Okay. Listen. Listenlistenlisten.

I know everyone is pissed about season 4. I hear you. I get it. I don’t think anyone is thinking that this was a well-executed season. Not by any stretch of the imagination.

But hear me out.

The bones of the thing are good in principle. The arc makes sense at the heart of it. Again, hear me out.

MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

The entire series is about saving the world by stopping the apocalypse. And as all the Fives in the deli have shown, the apocalypse is due to the Hargreeves siblings’ very existence. Reginald has fucked over every iteration of the kids to bring back his wife who died as a result of her own actions in creating marigold. He couldn’t give her up, and he was willing to rip universes apart to get her back. Five has tried time and time and time again to save his family, ad infinitum. He knows how to solve the problem, but he can’t bring himself to do it. Until this Five. They are, as we here on tumblr love to say, doomed by the narrative.

Five also says the universe loves balance. We saw this in season 3 with the kugelblitz. They were an impossibility in the universe and the kugelblitz formed to solve the problem by eliminating them. Impossibility for impossibility.

One of the Fives founded the Commission to solve the problem. It happens every time.

Abigail’s purpose through the whole season is to ensure the Cleanse, to reset the universe to the correct timeline. She shouldn’t be there. The kids shouldn’t be there. They are a direct result of Reginald releasing marigold into the world to enact his plan of resurrecting Abigail. The universe is trying to return to homeostasis, balance itself. And in every iteration, it needs to rid itself of the marigold, the substance that shouldn’t exist in the first place.

Ergo, the principle is sound, in my opinion.

The execution was shit, as I’m sure we all can agree.  I don’t like that they cease to exist, necessarily, and I think there were other avenues they could have taken to avoid that. But I can stomach it.

The shit storm is certainly in the characterizations. They did almost everyone dirty in some way or another. I think it could have been saved with a few more episodes, but we know that Netflix sucks like that and the season definitely suffered after the strike. I won’t be going into all of the characters just now since I’m apparently a loquacious bitch and don’t have the space. (And I know this is all being screamed into the void anyway. None of y’all will be reading any of this lol.)

Here’s where I’m going to ruffle feathers. I buy into the whole Diego/Lila/Five thing. And here’s why. (Cut here because this bitch got real long. Like 1.5k words long. Oops.)

The first episode is called “The Unbearable Tragedy of Getting What You Want.” Is it a slightly contrived Now That We’re Not Superheroes Our Normal Lives Kind Of Suck thing? Absolutely. Has it been overused in basically everything ever? You bet. Does it kind of work here? Yeah, actually.

These people legitimately don’t know what to do without powers. They’re coming fresh off the heels of trying and failing to save the world 3 different times. That takes adjustment. A lot of adjustment.

Lila and Diego fall into parenthood, which is a huge thing in and of itself. It’s not surprising that Diego turns into the stereotypical suburban dad, the breadwinner because that’s what he thinks his role should be. It doesn’t fully make sense that Lila turns into a housewife, but I can see her trying to throw Diego a bone and trying to make up for how she’s treated him in the past. Not to mention proving herself as a mother.

It makes sense for Lila to want to get out of the house and do her own thing, without her kids and her husband. It makes sense for Diego to resent his low level job when all he’s wanted to be is a badass and a hero.  Their frustration about their family life is understandable. Being a family is a lot of effort. There’s a loss of freedom when people become parents. And these are two headstrong people who have things to prove to themselves, to make sure they show up for their kids. Which leads to breakdowns in taking care of themselves and their relationship to each other.

Now, the sticky bit comes in with the whole love triangle. I know folks hate the subway subplot. Here’s the thing, despite how it was executed, it makes sense, too.

It’s an interesting way to portray the Many Worlds Theory and it’s plausible enough that Lila and Five connect in this way because of their shared knowledge of the Commission. It makes sense that they explore it together.

Which leads me to this: Five is incredibly lonely. He spent 40 years alone in an apocalypse and tried everything in his power to get back. He fell in love with a mannequin because she was the only thing keeping him tethered and sane-adjacent (sweet Dolores, we’ll never forget you, queen). He was desperate and alone and persisted because he had to.

He joined the Commission to try and stop said apocalypse and then inadvertently ended up in another. He’s tired of trying to save his family over and over and now he’s not sure there’s anything he can do to save them this time. And now here he is, stuck in the labyrinthine Subway of Fuckery with Lila and they can’t get out. Lila who has the same training as him, the same knowledge base, who went with him to the remnants of the Commission in season 3 and tried to save them all. Let’s call them frenemies, I guess.

And now here they are. Stuck together and feeling helpless. Enduring every fucking thing under the sun, watching each other’s backs, and they only have each other. And they’re tired. They’ve been searching for a way home for six fucking years. So, they decide to stop running and catch their breath. I won’t say it’s an inevitability, but Five is so lonely and scared. And Lila is lonely and scared and without her children. But they’re safe with each other, and they take comfort in each other, and it’s so easy to blur those lines.

So yeah, they end up together in the now infamous cottagecore greenhouse with the strawberries. And they try not to think about Diego. Is it right of them to do this? Well, no. But are people messy as hell? Yes. And are their actions understandable? Also yes.

So, to me, when Five finds the notebook and keeps it hidden from Lila, it tracks. Because he’s so fucking scared of what’s going to happen now. What if they still can’t make it back? What if they can’t save the world this time? What if it all comes down around his ears again? So he hides in easy domesticity and thinks about the solace they’ve found in each other.

And Lila, understandably, blows up when she realizes Five has hidden this from her. Because for her, this was a way to cope. To survive, as she says. She loves her children. And she loves Diego. She didn’t stop loving them. She couldn’t stop loving them. But she might just love Five, too. And isn’t that scary as hell?

People are many faceted, my friends. Does it make what she did morally right? Of course not. But does it make sense? I truly think it does.

The limited number of episodes is one of the largest contributors to the half-baked-ness of it all. There’s not enough time to flesh out a proper resolution to the whole thing. Which led to Diego’s hunch from episode 2 of Lila cheating with Greek guy/Five accidentally being correct foreshadowing. Which then resulted in a heavy confession from Lila in front of the entire family (which I was digging, just like the siblings, tbh). And then the boys started throwing punches and the whole love triangle thing went completely down the shitter (a dubious and debatable statement, I know).

So, that leaves us with Lila who is now in the middle of two brothers. Said brothers are now physically fighting out bad blood and pent up frustration. And only part of it is due to Lila.

Diego’s character is criminally underdeveloped. He was always halfway between the underdog and class clown and his characterization in this season falls spectacularly flat in all aspects. He’s a character who has fought to prove himself over and over again, and is still trying to do that here, but nothing really lands. Diego and Luther are comic relief mostly. And Diego’s role, unfortunately, ended up being a stick in the spokes of a sloppy love triangle and pretty much nothing else.

Five is obviously the favorite in Blackman’s eyes. Five is knowledgeable. Five always has an idea. Five is the one the family looks to for answers, more often than not. Five is the one who almost always opts to save his family in some way, shape, or form. And this has resulted in Five being sad and helpless, in a way. He has been building this emotional bomb for decades and across timelines without any real release or acknowledgement. So Blackman chose to have Five get his emotional release in the form of “a love story” with Lila. Doing it this way, with the limited number of episodes, left Diego’s part woefully inadequate.

No resolution really takes place here. Diego kind of “wins” insofar as he convinces Lila to take their family to the subway and she takes his hand first when they all say goodbye. Five gets the teary “I hate you for this,” after she ends up choosing self-sacrifice with the others, which we know means “I am so incredibly sad and I hate that you told us the truth because it means everything ends for real this time and I’ve had to let my family go.” Then she holds his hand, too, showing that all is forgiven, here at the end of all things.

There’s definitely not a resolution for Diego, and it can certainly be inferred that he still pretty much hates Five’s guts. I get the feeling that Five is just resigned to finally ending the cycle. He knows he’s hurt Diego badly and I think he does feel bad for it, but it’s not translated into the final scene, which leaves the whole situationship hollow and earned it the well deserved hate for hilariously poor execution.

So that’s it, friends. That’s my unpopular opinion and way too many words justifying it. I surprisingly have more I could blather on about, but I’ll spare y’all from including any more in this post. Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.

And for a final palate cleanser for those of you who do not care about any of this: I think we deserve a side plot of Five and Derek the Twink from the CIA. The true OTP. (Also Brisket Five, who is the real MVP.)

[qatheauthoress74]

Transformers One Spoiler Review

There are so many spoliers in this review. I am not kidding when I say go watch the film (five times at least) before reading this. Okay? Good.

I’m gonna be honest here. Growing up I wasn’t all that invested in the Transformers franchise as other kids were. I ocasionally watched a random episode of Transformers Animated or Prime whenever they were on TV back in the day but I wasn’t what you’d call a fan. All that changed after I watched Bumblebee (2018) on a whim and it changed my brain chemistry in the best way. Seriously, that film is still one of my comfort movies and I love it so much that I even began to write fanfiction again with several TF fics, including my Riding A Sunset story (https://archiveofourown.org/works/17648414/chapters/41617823).

But before Bumblebee, theatrical Live Action Transformer films had the infamous status of being bad to downright terrible for overusing bland human characters over the Autobots or Decepticons as well as being very inconsistent with their own established continuity. Not to mention making some characters act very out of character. Seeing a film like Bumblebee helped me believe that filmmakers are capable of telling a story that not only respects the lore but also genuinely cares about substance over spectacle outside of the well-made fight scenes. That was why I wanted to give Rise of the Beasts a chance when it came out but I was sadly a little underwhelmed. It is still better than any of the Transformer films Micheal Bay directed, but personally, that’s like saying the Eukrea 7 film “Pocket Full of Rainbows” is better than E7: Ao and the follow-up film trilogy, which isn’t saying much. Again, that’s just me and my biased opinion. Which is the whole point of this review.

But believe me when I say I did want to give Transformers One a chance. I was hopeful after learning it was going to be fully animated and would actually focus on the Transformers instead of some random humans. So, what kind of plot would the film be about it’s a prequel set on Cybertron?

Well…

Plot: The premise is the origin of the mighty leaders of the Autobots and Decepticons, Optimus Prime and Megatron, and how the two factions would eventually fight over control of their home planet, Cybertron. Both started as lowly miners unable to transform into vehicles like the other half of their race can and so are forced to work day in and day out in their underground home of Iacon City to collect the fuel source known as Energon. The reason they need to do so is because 50 cycles before the events of the story the leaders of Cybertron, The Primes, died in a war against an alien race called the Quintessons. After they were killed an important relic known as the Matrix of Leadership disappeared and it led to the Energon dwindling until it could only be found deep under the planet’s surface. Without Energon, the Cybertronians would perish, which is why Orion Pax (Optimus Prime’s identity before he became a Prime) wants to find out what happened to the Matrix of Leadership. The current leader of the Cybertronians, Sentinel Prime, is trying to find it out on the surface but has been unable to do so. D-16 (Megatron’s original name) would rather keep his head down but constantly gets dragged into whatever zany scheme Orion has come up with at the moment. Thanks to unintentionally antagonizing a Cybertronian named Darkwing the two get dumped into the lowest place imaginable and meet an overly talkative but friendly bot called B-127 (aka Bumblebee). There they discover a warped message from one of the fallen Primes, Alpha Trion, calling for aid. Orion sees this as an opportunity to find a clue to where the Matrix might be and convinces D and Bee to help him reach the surface and inadvertently brings along Elita-1, Pax and D’s former boss, who recently lost her job thanks to them breaking protocol to save another miner’s life. The four bots end up discovering Alpha Trion’s unconscious body and manage to wake him up. He reveals to them that Sentinel is not what he seems and tells them a horrible truth:

Sentinel was never a Prime and was the one responsible for killing the original Primes with help from the Quintessons.

And all of the Energon the Cybertronians have been mining was being given to the Quintessons by Sentinel as a form of hush money to keep them from revealing his true colors to the Cybertronians. The heroes later learn that he was also the one responsible for taking their cogs as newborns so they could never have the freedom to be anything else but miners. The story then goes to show how Orion, Elita, and Bee want to bring Sentinel to justice while D (who gets slowly consumed by his deeply suppressed anger) wants to seek vengeance against Sentinel for what he has done and kill him for his crimes. The story gradually unfolds as lines are drawn, and tragically, the beautiful friendship between Orion and D ends with them becoming bitter enemies under their new personas, Optimus and Megatron. The movie ends bittersweetly with Optimus inspiring his former fellow miners into becoming Autobots and bringing Energon back to the planet as soon as he was given the Matrix after he sacrificed himself trying to save Sentinel from D/Megatron’s wrath. He also gave the miners their T-Cogs back, restoring their freedom and autonomy. Optimus then sends a message to the Quintessons, telling them he and the Autobots will be ready to face them when they return. Meanwhile, Megatron forms a new faction consisting of the previous members of the dead Primes' High Guard and calls them Decepticons to remind themselves to never be deceived by anyone again.

Damn.

Characters/Voices: The film leans heavily on established lore from pretty much all of the comics, the Aligned Continuity, some Live Action stuff, and Transformers Animated. I wasn’t bothered by the celebrity voice cast. Don’t get me wrong, I will always choose professional VAs over celebrities anytime, but I genuinely thought everyone did a great job, especially Chris Hemsworth as Orion/Optimus and Brian Tyree Henry as D-16/Megatron. Henry said in interviews he was using his experience as an activist in college as inspiration for how resentful and angry D-16/Megatron sounded in wanting to change things and I say he succeeded. Hemsworth had done his homework by consulting with THE Optimus Prime himself, Peter Cullen. I personally like to believe Cullen shared his “how I became Optimus Prime story” which is summed up by how Optimus should “Be Strong Enough To Be Gentle.” The reason I think that is because I felt it in Hemsworth’s performance, especially at the end of the film. I loved how they gradually sounded more like Optimus and Megatron as the story progressed. Which is both amazing and heartbreaking at the same time because you could see from the start how close Orion and D-16 were to each other before learning about the truth. It gave me the same feelings after seeing other great friendships/sibling bonds like Vi/Power/Jynx and Moses/Ramses fall apart in Arcane and The Prince of Egypt. Also, was anyone else reminded of that scene from The Fox and The Hound Todd and Copper's promise of staying friends after seeing Optimus' flashback of his first meeting with D-16? );

Other standouts include Laurence Fishburne as Alpha Trion. He gave the Prime a grand presence that almost reminds me of James Earl Jones as Mufasa from The Lion King. RIP.

Scarlett Johansen was great as Elita-1, but I already had zero doubts since she had experienced voice acting before this film.

Vanessa Liguori did a great job of giving Airachnid a sinister personality.

And I have no idea who this “Jon Bailey” is, but he certainly gave Soundwave an “Epic” voice that I liked. ;)

Steven Buscemi as Starscream was a delightful surprise, even if I learned way more about Starscream’s kinks in this film than I would like, but hey, if he likes getting hit and choked, I won’t kink shame him.

Jon Hamm made me hate Sentinel so much. Give him an Oscar, please.

Now, the one actor who I was a bit wary of was Keegan-Michael Key as B-127/Bee. Bee has quickly become one of my favorite Transformers thanks to Bumblebee (2018), and I was worried Key would make him unbearable to sit through. But as I said earlier, the script (and possibly the voice director) made Bee come off as annoying in a “doesn’t know better” kind of way that almost leans to obnoxious but more akin to a hyperactive young adult who’s happy to have friends. Heck, the film even knows his voice could get annoying and made several funny jokes surrounding it. Also, the film knew to only have Bee talk too much during scenes that were supposed to be funny. When it came to the more quiet moments Bee was able to take things seriously as well as the rest of the characters.

And yes, I noticed Steve Blum was the racer announcer and archive guard. He did amazing as per usual. No notes.

Animation: I can’t stress enough how beautiful the animation for this film is. Industrial Light & Magic did an excellent job with the animation and I hope to see them do another Transformers film like this again. I loved the way Iacon City was designed.

The director, Josh Cooley, said the filmmakers were inspired by the Art Deco movement and you can see it from how the buildings look. It gives off a Metropolis meets Blade Runner in the best way. I also liked the way the roads and rail tracks would “magically” appear when someone was driving on them. And the way the planet’s mountains moved was also nice to look at.

And this is something that my mom liked while she watched the film was how Alpha Trion used sand to show the past and what happened to the Primes. (Who knew Alpha Trion was an Earthbender? XD)

One touch that I really like was when after the quartet learns of Sentinel’s alliance when the Quintessons you can see D-16 is sitting further away from the others and has his back facing them. A subtle sign showing the growing distance between him and the heroes. And the way his optics gradually changed from gold, orange, and finally to red was done very well.

Also, when Orion reunited with the miners he made sure to kneel so he wasn’t towering over them. It’s a nice way that show how humble he truly is compared to Sentinel and later Megatron.

And another thing was when D-16 shot Orion his left arm got destroyed. D-16 originally ad the Megatronus Prime decal Orion gifted him at the beginning of the film on his right arm, too. It truly feels like D-16 is destroying his old self in that moment.

Did anyone else notice that Shockwave and Soundwave initially had yellow optics and visors, but they were changed to red in the post-credit scene? They must've did it to match their new leader, which I'm sure Starscream was very "happy" about since he was originally leader of the High Guard and had red optics before Megatron. XD

I didn’t expect this film to get violent, but the shot of Megatron killing Sentinel by pulling him apart was brutal. The film did not kid around with its PG rating.

Nitpicks:

If I could complain about a few things I would say that I wished the film had a slightly longer runtime. At least 10-15 more minutes in the third act. I would’ve loved to see more of the final battle with the miners fighting Sentinel’s soldiers and Optimus vs. Megatron. I did mean it when I said Hemsworth and Henry killed it as Optimus and Megatron. But hey, if their performances were that good it definitely convinced me to go see the next film with them in it.

I would’ve liked to have seen other animals on Cybertron’s surface besides those metal deer but that’s just me.

Also, this is just a me thing again, but I kinda wished the miner characters (or minors XD) had more distinct voices. It’s just that since the Generation 1 cartoon, all of the Autobots were known for having unique accents like Ironhide’s southern drawl, Wheeljack’s Brooklyn accent, or Jazz’s smooth way of speaking. I mean, if the High Guard/Decepticons were allowed to have voices based on their original counterparts the Autobots should’ve had the same thing, ya know?

And how dare they tease me with namedropping “Medic Ratchet” but not actually have him appear in the film. I want my grumpy doc-bot. And Drift. I don’t think I saw Deadlock with the High Guard. Did anyone? I think I mostly just saw Seekers and Coneheads in the crowd shots.

HC/Theories:

The reason mining Energon was so dangerous had to do with Primus himself deliberately trying to halt it as much as possible. Think about it, Primus sent the Matrix of Leadership away before Sentinel could use it. I bet Primus didn’t want Sentinel to give Energon to the Quintessons which Sentinel ended up doing by making Cybertronians mine for it. Primus also probably made the mountains move while the group was on the train because we later learn it was full of Energon and not waste like Elita initially thought. Primus has been trying to undermine Sentinel’s plans all this time but probably couldn’t do too much damage as he didn’t want to hurt innocent Cybertronians in the process. And another thing to add is the fact that it looks like the planet itself is moving after Orion was dropped by D-16/Megatron so that Primus himself would bring him to the planet’s core and bring him to life as Optimus Prime because he knew the young miner was worthy of the Matrix.

I’m pretty sure Jazz became one of the first Autobots because he wanted to show his appreciation to Optimus for saving his life earlier in the film.

I like to think the reason why B talked so much in One was probably to make up for the fact that he barely talked at all in previous TF films. Though, there is another theory going around that in the next movie, the filmmakers are planning to make him mute which is why he talks alot in One. I seriously hope that WON’T happen because I’m sick and tired of Bee losing his voice so often. I know some later shows have avoided this, namely Robots in Disguise (2015) and EarthSpark, but I would seriously love the films to follow the same example.

Overall:

I love this movie a lot. I’m pretty sure if this was my first time seeing it instead of Bumblebee (2018) I think this would’ve altered my brain chemistry as much as that film did. If you haven’t seen this movie go watch it and if you have, go see it again. I WANT this movie to do well in theaters and not be a failure. The fact that it took us this long to get a film that captures the Spark of Transformers and be something both fans and newcomers can enjoy is nothing short of a miracle. We need Hasbro and Paramount to know this and Bumblebee are the kind of content we want to keep seeing and not the same movie with “Bayhem” over and over again.

Thank you. I’m already writing another blog about this movie soon. It’s going to be about why TF: One is a better Wish movie than Wish (2023). Trust me, it’ll make sense once I post it. XD

Keep on Writin’ and Rockin’

[boysssofthemonth]

Cardigan

JJ Maybank Series: Teenage Love Triangle Masterlist

Genre: Angst Warnings: None Words: 1700

JJ makes the biggest mistake of his life, and you have the rest of your life to pay for it.

Vintage tee, brand new phone High heels on cobblestones When you are young, they assume you know nothing Sequined smile, black lipstick Sensual politics When you are young, they assume you know nothing

For much of your life, it had been ingrained that hate was a strong word. It would be best practice to refrain from carelessly applying it to your vocabulary. 

But from a young age you were confronted with life lessons prompting you to learn just how much more weight the word love carried. And without careful consideration, the overuse of the word could wear out its substance. Throwing around the word could do more damage than good. 

Your parents were never the role model for what love was supposed to be - they were everything that it shouldn’t be. 

You were determined to be careful of who you chose to love, and to do so with caution. And most importantly, don’t trust boys who say they love you. 

But, as much as your life was predetermined the same way everybody else’s was. You were young and inexperienced. The road ahead longer than what was behind you. 

An essential part of an individual’s young life is ignorance, and despite the wisdom of those older, the best way to learn a lesson is through exposure. 

Your biggest life lesson?

JJ. 

Your history dated back in elementary school but your first actual interaction did not occur until freshman year in highschool. You spent your childhood shying away from the crowd, and JJ had his friends. He always had friends. 

But the world was your oyster, and in freshman year, your life changed when JJ sat beside you one lunch time - which continued on for the next few years. JJ with his big toothy grin, sharp comebacks and boyish appearance. Who could not fall in love with his charming personality?

Eventually you became that duo and the school was well aware of your relationship. There no longer was a Y/n and no longer a JJ. It became Y/n and JJ. 

Where’s Y/n? Probably with JJ.

I’m gonna invite JJ to the party. Y/n will probably come too.

It began romantically - but messy - just as every high school love story goes. When your inexperiences catch up to you, and you both come to an understanding that being in a relationship wasn’t just holding hands and being seen around each other or calling each other cute names. 

A relationship was a bond, requiring commitment and change. There was now a link between two individuals and through life's greatest challenges, you were to stand strong together. 

But JJ was young, and she was always there.

But I knew you Dancin' in your Levi's Drunk under a streetlight, I I knew you Hand under my sweatshirt Baby, kiss it better, I

You and JJ came up against many trials that were critical to the development of both your individual selves but also your relationship. Your love and fondness of each other blossomed like an elegant rose, envied by others for its beauty and passion. A love overflowing with romance and childish dreams.

Your time was well spent in each others company and you shared many firsts. Like the much anticipated first kiss, first dance, first party, first drink. The firsts for everything was with JJ. And throughout it all he was caring and understanding.

JJ showed you what love was and could be. He was the role model that you needed growing up to show you how to be loved.

But JJ was also surrounded by all his friends. Everybody that he loved.

And when I felt like I was an old cardigan Under someone's bed You put me on and said I was your favorite

When family ties loosened and friendships failed. JJ became the one constant in your life, readily available whenever you needed him. 

When you felt unsafe in your own home, you found solace in JJ. He provided you a home in his heart, the same as you providing him a place in your heart. Nobody could understand the pain you were going through the way JJ did. In a way, you both lived similar lives - having parents who were never really there. 

When you felt like you were another hole in the wall, ignored but a silent burden, JJ patched you up and made you feel beautiful again. 

He would always, without ever a single doubt, pick you,

That’s what you thought, anyway. 

A friend to all is a friend to none Chase two girls, lose the one When you are young, they assume you know nothing

Your first warning from the very beginning should have been his kindness. 

JJ was the life of the party and was constantly surrounded by people. But your entire relationship he showed up, and his loyalty never once wavered. 

But you were seventeen, and everybody tells you that you’re too young and naive. Too immature. Life throws you obstacles so that you can learn from them.

First loves never last, but their impact will remain throughout the rest of your life. 

She was always there too. Sharing laughter, attending the parties, going to the school dances, riding out the waves of life the same as you and JJ. And JJ was kind to everyone, so JJ was kind to her.

But I knew you, Playing hide and seek and Giving me your weekends, I I knew you Your heartbeat on the High Line Once in twenty lifetimes, I

Roses are beautiful, they signify love and passion. But with everything beautiful, a dark side is concealed until eventually something forces it to come out of hiding. 

The signs became clearer and the thorns became sharper. 

She was only supposed to be a friend - that’s what he assured you - and you were supposed to understand. But she became a more frequent character in your life. 

You were the old cardigan again, shoved under the bed, no longer remembered. She was new, the latest style and perfect proportions. Only you could dream to be like her. 

All it took was one summer away from Kildare, away from JJ, to change everything. 

To kiss in cars and downtown bars Was all we needed You drew stars around my scars But now I'm bleedin'

You reminisce on the days being with JJ. How love made you feel. How JJ himself made you feel.

Running around town, not giving a care in the world. It was you and him, against everybody else.

Trying out all the new cafes, ordering new items that you both had never tried before, and JJ offering you his drink if you didn't like your choice.

Competing on regular bowling dates, with JJ never giving you the chance to beat him (that's just his nature, JJ always had to win). But making it up to you by buying whatever you wanted at the ice cream store.

Reading your favorite book and JJ taking the time out of his day to listen to your review, providing you with just the right amount of responses so that you knew he was really listening.

Watching tv shows together, laughing at the corny jokes, gagging at the love scenes. But also seeing your love portrayed in the films you watched.

If he had just been with you, maybe she would have never had the chance.

When it returns to your mind, the wounds that never healed are reopened and you are reminded of your loss. You lost your love, guardian and believer.

The one who could console you in your darkest days.

JJ had you believe that no other man, besides your father, could harm you. But they were lies, because the very boy that those words came out from, was the very same boy that hurt you. The wounds much more painful and deeper than your fathers. Because at least you grew up not knowing any better, that was your father and it was expected.

But JJ? He tricked you. He made you believe that he would always protect you.

'Cause I knew you Steppin' on the last train Marked me like a bloodstain, I I knew you

JJ’s disloyalty was the cause of the end of your relationship, but more than that, his treatment towards you as the relationship began to crash down. He chose that road, filled with lies, betrayal and dishonesty. He chose a life that he could not come back from when he willingly put her above you.

JJ proved to you that he was just a boy and you had more self-respect than to stay with a boy. You learnt first hand from your own mother what staying could do. 

Tried to change the ending Peter losing Wendy, I I knew you

You loved JJ, and love was enough for you to allow JJ into your heart in the first place. Although it did take some time. But you opened up to him. Nevertheless, deep down, you were aware of the dangerous path you had chosen for yourself. 

You knew the risks of getting involved with a boy, and that first relationships usually never last. But despite that, you gave him a chance. 

JJ was young and he was a boy still navigating life blindly. He was disappointed in himself, and ashamed of what he had done. 

The moment he found out that you knew what happened, he was quick to apologise, and begged you to forgive him.

You could see it in his eyes, the regret and shame. You knew this would have a lasting impact on him. But his mistakes were irreversible.

Leavin' like a father Running like water, I And when you are young, they assume you know nothing

The betrayal stained you, like red wine on a white dress. 

You reminded yourself that life was filled with lessons, and this was just a part of that, but the hurt remained a constant in your life. 

JJ promised you many things, but he had other plans. 

You were used to people entering and leaving your life, but this hurt the most.

But I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss I knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs The smell of smoke would hang around this long 'Cause I knew everything when I was young I knew I'd curse you for the longest time Chasin' shadows in the grocery line I knew you'd miss me once the thrill expired And you'd be standin' in my front porch light And I knew you'd come back to me You'd come back to me And you'd com*e back to me And you'd come back

Despite the break up, JJ was still there, haunting you at every corner of your life. 

You explored the town together and now every lamp post and every ice cream store were just reminders of his betrayal. Of everything that you lost. Every book you read had never felt the same again. 

You knew that you had to endure this pain endlessly, and your love for JJ, in spite of the circumstances, would never waver. 

But you were angry. Angry and shameful. 

Angry at JJ for what he did, lying to you and proposing empty promises. 

You felt shameful, that you allowed a boy to get so close to you and grant him the power to hurt you tremendously. Because all along you knew things could never stay blissful, but you still allowed him access to your heart and rip it apart. Leaving you with nothing but broken promises, tears of blood and a wilted rose. 

But he came back, knocking on your door, begging to be let in again and show you that love did exist in the midst of his infidelity. 

But how could you let him in again?

Taglist: @fals3-g0d

[meafortuna]

ASTRO NOTES # 7

Spiritual awakening or just an astrology? 🪬

It's kind of a trend nowadays to get into spirituality, which I can't say is a bad thing, but I'm a logical thinking person and an over-thinker😅 and decide to go a little deeper into this topic. After all, astrology is a science, and that science can explain a lot about things like the dark night of the soul, the death of the ego, or even twin flames. Here are some astrological transits that will make you feel like something extraordinary is happening to you. I hope you enjoy this one. 🫶

• Uranus transiting (conjunction, opposition, square) your natal Moon. You may start to feel like you are thunderstrucked⚡️, something in you have really changed with the blink of an eye. Your emotions may become more unpredictable, your thoughts may start moving in different places and directions. It’s like you are going crazy, but you know you’re not. You will feel just like an alien, like you don’t belong here. 🛸

• Transit Pluto to your natal Sun. Oh, my godness! 🫥 This is one of the biggest transformation you will have in your life, especially if it’s in conjunction with your Sun. The ego death is real, your whole belief system changes and it’s hard, really hard. You will struggle with the urge to make the changes you will need to make, because you will have to lose someone or something you don’t want to lose. This will be your greatest rebirth. 🌅 After this transit, nothing will be the same in you and for you. It’s painful, but it’s probably the most powerful and beautiful process of your entire life.

• Saturn returns, in particular the first one. Here the things can be a little bit smoother, because after all Saturn represents the karma, the lessons we have to learn. 🪐 So if you have been working hard on the things you want and you still doesn’t see any results, wait until your Saturn return, everything it will reward you. And if you haven’t done any work to achieve your goals (here we can talk about health, work, love life and etc, depends on the house your Saturn is sitting) you will have to learn the hard way why does something always go wrong. In these about two and a half years, you will have to learn some lessons about patience or responsibility, in other words - you will have to grow up. 🐛 - 🦋

• Transiting Neptune 🔱 aspecting your Moon. With this transit you can start diving really deep into your subconscious. 🧘‍♀️You may feel the urge to start exploring yourself more, things like astrology, psychology, esotericism will naturally appeal to you. But there’s always a catch… there is a danger of overuse of substances that can lead to addiction. But if you’re smart enough, you will use the 🍄🍃more as a tool and with intent, not just to escape reality or to make yourself feel better.

• On the Twin Flame topic. ♾️ Here we don’t talk about transits, just aspects.

Pluto/Saturn/Neptune in contact with Venus or luminaries in synastry. The intense of the connection between two individuals it will be so strong, powerful and magnetic, like its something really destined to be. Aspects like this can lead to feeling like you have finally met your Twin Flame. 🎎🔥I will quickly explain why. With Pluto you will feel that transformative love you have never met before, we know the relationship between twin flames is super tense and emotional. 💣 Saturn will make you go back to each other, because there are lessons that have to be learned, that gives the on and off dynamic of the couple and the feeling you know that person from before. Neptune will give you that telepathic and outworldly feeling. 💞

I don’t want to kill the magic, but science is science and if you know how to use it, you will go much easier through your spiritual awakening journey.✨⚔️📚

~meafortuna💙

[steampunkforever]

To be clear, and I bag on it enough that it should be, Solarpunk is a nothing-genre working as a synthesis of generational Toyota Prius stockholme syndrome and the consequences of corporate and social reduction of “punk” to mere aesthetics.

Though littered with trashy romance novels (thanks to its high percentage of bodices ready for ripping) Steampunk had antiimperialism at its core. Dieselpunk, which I’m less familiar with, provides opportunities to critique industrialization* and nationalism by its inherent interwar setting. These are ‘punk genres that, though often misused (insert debate on efficacy of cyberpunk here, or at least copy and paste it from my capstone paper) have a sort of basic ideological discussion baked into them. It might be just a dusting of commentary, but its ingrained into the genre.

Solarpunk has none of this! It’s sci-fi with a kudzu problem! There is no punk. It’s just futurism with extra trees. 

Look at you, you’ve managed to place some shrubs on top of a tower. unfortunately, that does not a genre make. It’s not even a new idea architecturally. The city of Lucca’s had that on lock for centuries.

Fixing Solarpunk and making it earn the title of genre means putting some substance in the aesthetic and filling the hollowness with some conflict, be it against social engineering/ecofascism (Logans Run, a bit of a reach), or greenwashing (Soylent Green, also a reach) Or government over-regulation (Red Barchetta, right on the money). But that’ll never happen, because the solarpunk aesthetic is inherently built on a naive ever-smiling idiocy. And you need the cynicism of counterculture to be punk.

Solarpunk has no counterculture. Its entire aesthetics point to there being no counterculture. The literal architecture of the “genre” tells us: “the establishment has accepted and is actively supporting sustainable living. You have nothing to fight for, the war on pollution is won.”

Solarpunk is to its twee fans what The Libertarian Free Market is to guys who think we should privatize healthcare MORE or what the “Revolution” is to tankies who treat it like a Government-funded-rapture-utopia. Everything will be all right, Society is on our side, and the sun comes out precisely when we tell it to.

That’s not a genre, and it certainly isn’t punk.

*By this metric, Dieselpunk would’ve been the logical wellspring for cottagecore, but funnily enough the cottagecore aesthetic actually owes more of its existence to the same cultural impulses that popularized Solarpunk stock photography. I’m gonna say the word “hopepunk” here because you can only look at the word solarpunk so many times before written language has ceased to maintain any semblance of coherence so why not embrace my role as a monkey seated at a overused typewriter?

[necropathys]

I love those headcannons! *Eagerly awaits the nightmares post when you have time* 👀

I'm really happy you liked them, Anon. A continuation of this post:

I think SwapDream Nightmare is physically quick and spry, but this agility comes at a cost. He suffers from joint and mobility issues that cause pain and stiffness, especially after intense movement. Over time, the strain subtly impacts his endurance, forcing him to manage his energy more carefully as time passes. His relentless nightmares leave him with insomnia and chronic fatigue, making it difficult for him to stay focused and patient. Often, his exhaustion leaves him zoned-out or unsteady as he pushes himself to keep going. His smoking habit (and less frequent bouts of substance abuse) offers him a brief sense of control over his insomnia and pain, even though he knows it takes a toll on his health.

Nightmare has one eye socket completely covered in corruption, leading to narrower vision and partial sight loss on that side. This limitation subtly impacts his spatial awareness and can affect his sense of control. Also, his body has been altered by the dark magic and corruption he absorbed, leading to a constant dull, aching pain throughout his body. His tentacles are especially sensitive, sometimes leaving him in intense pain if they’re damaged or overused. This pain can flare up unexpectedly, making him withdraw or become irritable.

Additionally, I think Nightmare experiences photophobia—intense sensitivity to bright lights—due to the nature of his corruption and relating to his control over shadow/darkness. Bright environments can be painful and overwhelming, prompting him to avoid sunny or well-lit areas in favor of darker, quieter spaces.

Shattered Nightmare’s often suffers from dissociation and identity confusion (“I’m not supposed to exist…”), making him question his reality, especially under stress or when his past resurfaces. He suffers from mild PTSD due to past trauma, with flashbacks triggered by certain sensations or visual cues that remind him of painful conflicts, leaving him momentarily vulnerable until he can ground himself. Additionally, he is blind in one eye due to a broken skull around his eye socket, resulting in narrowed vision that further challenges his perception and sense of stability.

[sophieinwonderland]

dissociative disorders and plurality really aren’t the same though. do you know what it’s like to be triggered by something innocuous because your body thinks it’s in danger and be sent into a spiral that can take hours to get out of? and you can have parts be cognitively aware that you were triggered! and still, you cannot get out of the spiral. you just have to allow time to pass and find distractions or use drugs (and wind up with substance abuse issues on top). it isn’t fun. and you can go for years having this happen before you realize what is happening. so you just feel really confused and like a fuck up crazy person and you can barely maintain any relationships.

maybe in healing and in recovery they become more alike, but there’s a reason it’s called a disorder.

That doesn't sound as much like a dissociative disorder as just PTSD. Right?

I'm not going to say there's no relation between the two, but I feel like you can have people going through what you describe, including endogenic systems, who don't have any sort of dissociative disorder because you don't need a dissociative disorder to have PTSD.

Dissociative disorder symptoms would be more the derealization and depersonalization symptoms, the amnesia, internal conflicts between headmates. Arguably even harmful overuse of inner worlds if we take the view that maladaptive daydreaming is a dissociative disorder.

But what you're describing just sounds like PTSD, which while highly comorbid with dissociative disorders, isn't a dissociative disorder in and of itself.

[party-gilmore]

the thing is like i am very pro weed in general like hell yeah if you wanna do drugs do drugs it’s literally like alcohol drink if you wanna drink smoke if you wanna smoke just be cognizent of the people around you cuz weed has that smoke byproduct alcohol doesn’t

but the flip side of that SAME coin is that… it’s literally LIKE ALCOHOL. people forget that it IS in fact a drug. and overuse/abuse/addiction* is NOT taken seriously - even LESS seriously than alcohol abuse, in many cases

*and before anyone gets all “scuse you MY weed doesn’t have any addictive chemicals!” no but your BRAIN fucking does. addiction isn’t just the chemicals in the shit you take, it’s habits and desires and feelings and activities and all the endorphins you get from those YES you can be fucking addicted to weed

and like i’ve got people IRL im watching struggle with so much in their life right now and i want SO BADLY to be like… hey, im not trying to write this off as JUST about the weed or anything, but i REALLY think there’s some overuse problems you have with this substance that is HEAVILY contributing to the issues

but i see so many people getting shit down as being “too sensitive or puritan or fear mongering” about it in ways you don’t really see with alcohol, BECAUSE the fight to have it be accepted recreationally has been so difficult which i DO understand that part!

but if ANYONE were tipsy as often as some of this people are high, like CONSTANTLY sipping out of a flask the way people hit their pens, using it WHILE like ACTIVELY driving… EVERYONE around them who cared about them would be like. There’s a problem here, hun.

And even if the individual balks and insists they don’t have a problem, no one thinks you’d be trying to like fully bring back PROHIBITION for trying to call attention to the dangers of alcohol abuse… it would be nice if the same reasonable responses were offered when pointing out dangers of THC abuse.

[axelsthoughtss]

Thank god The Heart Killers is happening because I need JoongDunk to take on gritty, edgy characters. They just look too mature to be good ol' uni students (and I'm also SO done with that trope).

Star In My Mind was an okay debut series as a ship. It wasn't anything groundbreaking but it was fine (Dunk also needed more acting lessons. Baby boy can act but doesnt now how to react. He looks like he doesnt know what to do with himself when he's receiving after saying his lines). Their chemistry was immaculate though, and they do have potential, which made me expect more from them.

Hidden Agenda feels like a continuation of SIMM. It's still the same overused, unrequited-love-but-not-really, university trope, just a bit more mature and sexier. It did not quite scratch that itch that I had of them after watching SIMM. I expected more......substance? Complexity? Better script? Idk, just more. Nothing really stood out to me from this series except for their chemistry.

I don't really want to expect too much from THK but I love JD so much that I just want them to have that one series where it really puts them in the map. Fingers crossed it's THK for them.

[the-lonelyshepherd]

what does indigo do. like what effect does it have on the human body and how do ppl take it (smoking, eating, injection etc)?

HELLO!!!!! indigo time

so first in case people aren’t liek following every part of my oc thing,,, indigo is like. kind of a drug? ish? it’s a substance sourced in the first threshold (main wacky events of the story) from these butterfly monsters that i literally cannot design i hate them. it’s refined by a group that shay and cat come across and used to sell for money and also used for other. things

there’s a few different versions of indigo so indigo in its raw form is a kind of venom stored in spines on the butterfly monsters. it’s, as the name implies, a very recognizable saturated purple-blue color. the butterfly monsters are very dependent on salt.

most of the salt in the human body (in most animals, but we’re talking people) is stored blood (plasma specifically), sweat, urine, and tears.

if you do happen to get pounced by a butterfly monster (they’re stealthy at first) and stabbed with a spine, you are going to be a. mess of fluid! it’s basically an extreme emotional high (important) and are in tears you are probably going to piss yourself and your nose is bleeding. and then later probably your ears and maybe your eyes and any other possible. wound that might be inflicted. and then u kinda get like. licked to death. they don’t have very strong jaws (and in some designs they only have a proboscis) so they aren’t able to tear flesh to eat. so instead they have indigo.

sounds nasty right. well what if we took it in small refined amounts 💞💞💞💞 yum

basically after years and years of people getting stuck in the first layer forming groups killing each other killing themslves getting eaten etc. some groups did manage to stick around a little longer than most. including one very important one to the story ,,,, a group that. among other things. created a method to refine indigo into a kind of drug because if there’s one thing we love on the range besides alcohol and sex workers after a long day it’s liquid meth on steroids. yay!

this group gets such profits from selling indigo in the first later that they do consciously stay in the first threshold, which is full of. weird sucky shit. (the logistics of how this group specifically does inter layer transport is still being worked out but it IS difficult and they do keep it very. secret. which backfires).

their specific indigo is meant to be taken in small amounts in liquid form by mouth, though injection is also being experimented with.

taking refined indigo also causes an emotional high, usually a positive feeling one but sometimes people have bad. experiences with it. it’s usually very. euphoric though. everything feels a lot like something and it’s very bright and your heart is beating really fast. people usually get teary-eyed. some people think they can talk to god. apparently it’s quite the experience.

ODing can make you piss yourself though. among other things

overuse usually causes frequent nosebleeds and nonsensical crying as well as high blood pressure.

since indigo is so expensive, its common to order it in a drink at the saloon - a minuscule amount in some hard liquor gets you drunk(high?) five times faster than normal. and when you get paid 25 dollars a month its a relief to cut the cost of a good time by five times.

they had so much fun with mixed drinks back then 💞

i hope that was enough info i can talk more if needed grin

[tenebriskukris]

Oshi No Ko Chapter 155 - My Thoughts/Analysis

I never thought that this series would disappoint me more than it did with Chapter 152 but apparently the manga is just shoveling us utter dogshit on our plates now and expects the readers to think it’s the best thing since sliced bread. Let’s just get on with it. Spoilers for Oshi No Ko Chapter 155 below.

And so we open this chapter with Ruby’s POV. Finally we get to see her thoughts on this whole mess. And with double black star eyes too? Considering we see her have white star eyes a few chapters ago I’m Assuming that there isn’t much of a timeskip between the movie being shown to select people and this interview but the manga’s use of timeskips without a clear timeline being placed is just yuck. 

This entire issue wouldn’t be relevant in the first place if the manga didn’t sidestep showing the readers key reveals when they happened chronologically in the first place. Or already have a tendency to have these conversations and key reveals offscreen of all things. 

I’m going to do what I can for Ai. Like jump off a building? I wouldn’t be surprised if that man does something like that after he’s had this worldview shattered into dust. Or does something hasty like go on a murder spree. The worst kind of person to deal with is one that has nothing left to lose—they’re unpredictable. 

Aqua letting him go here is just a huge fucking mistake. He pulled the strings to kill Ai, after all. What’s to say that these events wouldn’t lead him to kill anyone else. Ruby, himself, Literally Anyone Else. It’s plausible that he could lash out at people and cause a whole mess. If someone from the movie dies while it’s being pushed out then it’s going to cause more than enough controversy to get the movie pulled from theaters. Who would want to screen the movie if one of the actors died because of it??? It would be a nightmare of legal issues. 

Your revenge is over now. Interesting. So Aqua’s given up on revenge? Or does he have something more planned? Another case of the series telling us these things without actually showing the progression of events happening to these characters and expecting the readers to just be okay with these logical leaps happening. It’s a trick that’s only useful if a writer doesn’t overuse it, but the way this series is using it as a crutch is just disgraceful. 

Incredible. No decompression. No conversation between the twins about what they just experienced. Just a timeskip back to Miyako. If they don’t talk about what just happened in this chapter I swear to all the gods and deities above—

Well that was a cute interaction between Miyako, Aqua and Ruby. It is also a cheap way to tug at the reader’s heartstrings. This entire scene would hit harder if we actually managed to see Miyako in this pseudo-maternal role more but as it stands now it is nothing more than a toothless attempt to insert her into this arc as a pseudo-mother to the twins. This “newfound” understanding of Aqua’s character for her is also similarly one which has little substance behind it were it not a callback to the earlier chapters of the series. It’s a sad scene, don’t get me wrong, but it’s all style and little substance when one considers that Miyako’s paternal role has been rather lacking throughout the series.

And now we’re back with Ichigo. Wonder if we’ll ever see his interview come up—because that’s still up in the air, apparently. Same with the other interviews, but at this point I wouldn’t be surprised if they were all done offscreen like so many other important bits of the narrative.

Ruby made a choice. And telling Aqua that she’d encountered her father was just done offscreen again. Incredible. Absolutely incredible. Of course. Just offscreen the conversation that Ruby talks to Aqua about forgiving Hikaru—surely something like that isn’t relevant to Ruby’s character arc in the slightest. 

Not the mention that with Ruby’s black star eyes blazing in the start of the chapter—did she really forgive Hikaru or that just Aqua assuming she did? Oh! We don’t know because their entire conversation about Hikaru was offscreened in the first place. At least we know that Ruby knew who Hikaru was this whole time—which was a fact that was very obvious in the first place. 

With Ichigo not wanting to kill Hikaru anymore that’s more or less everyone’s revenge scheme more or less wrapped up. I highly doubt we’ll be getting any more insight on how they made these decisions in the past because it seems like this series is dispensing in quality and good narrative structure in exchange for rushing towards the ending as quickly as possible. I’ll be more than happy to eat my words later down the line if the series is going to give these characters and this story the time it needs to shine but I won’t hold my breath.

Finally we get an Akane appearance. I was starting to think she was killed offscreen. Would not surprise me in the slightest at this point. She got a new haircut!!! Very cute.

If Hikaru is the one behind everything, then some things don’t make sense. Of fucking course! Aqua and Akane both independently figure out that Hikaru and Niino were responsible for Yura—and a bunch more people’s—death! And this realization was also done offscreen again!

And then there’s another thing. I recall somewhere during the Mainstay arc that Aqua said that he knew Goro Amamiya but with Akane reading the script she would easily be able to tell that that was false because Goro died before Aqua was even born. For someone as observant and smart as Akane was she surely would be able to put two and two together and call Aqua out for his bullshit but noooooooooo. We’re just going to pretend that never happened, then. 

What a complete and utter travesty. So the narrative is now pointing at Niino as the final antagonist of the series. A side character who a good chunk of people didn’t even know existed and was first seen in some side material  until she showed up close to the end of the arc. After Hikaru was unceremoniously thrown out of that role without the sufficient narrative payoff after all the buildup. 

I think I have to make an amendment to what I said before on one of my previous chapter reviews. The quality of writing that we’re seeing here isn’t of a college level writing student. That would be giving the writers the credit that they don’t deserve. No, I’ve seen high school level students draft me a more coherent narrative than whatever the fuck was going on in these last few chapters. Amazing.

The editors of this manga must surely be hungover drunk in their seats or held at gunpoint if garbage like this is allowed to get published. Then again, any reader swallowing this slop uncritically deserves media that crashes and burns when it gets to the finish line. The main writer of the series already has a tendency to screw up the final arcs of his manga series so I’m flabbergasted that no one took a step back and bapped these chapters on the head because of how low quality they were. But I digress. 

Ruby changing her black star eyes directly into white star eyes in this chapter is just—why. Every time we see one of the twins change from black to white to black star eyes and back again it was because of some event that touched their life. Now it’s just—they do it whenever, I guess. Whenever the plot demands it with little to no repercussions.

Having Niino as the final antagonist is also incredibly yucky. This isn't a hashtag GirlBoss moment with her being responsible for Ai’s death. Her being the final obstacle for this series to overcome is some horrible social commentary and reeks of misogyny. The final antagonist of the series isn’t a product of the horrible system—some high ranking industry official who was also scarred by the industry and is now in a higher place to also exploit people in the same industry—ala Hikaru. No, the final antagonist is someone who was on the same level as Ai—even lower, really—who had a hand in her death and wants to keep people from reaching the same level as her.

That’s not even getting to the fact that having her as what is essentially the final boss of the series has to be one of the stupidest writing decisions I’ve ever seen in media—about as idiotic as having Kaguya from Naruto appear at the end of that mess of a series. If you told an Oshi No Ko fan when they started the series that the final antagonist of the series would be this random side character that was first shown in a short story they would laugh because of how stupid that twist would be—and yet it fucking happened!

On a slightly more serious note, Nino as the main antagonist fails so supremely for a variety of decisions. The first is buildup. The narrative has been pointing towards Hikaru for the majority of the series and now we’re pivoting to what is essentially a side character taking his place with little to no buildup. The stuff we got from the movie arc is so minor compared to how the narrative was building up towards Hikaru throughout the entirety of the series that pushing her to the main villain role is just cheap at this point.

The second is character. Or rather, her lack thereof. Nino is more of a plot device than a character from what we’ve seen of her already. Her motivation is to keep people from surpassing Ai and—what? That’s basically it. She’s a one note character without anything interesting going on behind those eyeballs with absolutely nothing else to say. At least Hikaru had some backstory and motivation shown—even if it was done in a completely haphazard way.

Let’s examine that point further, shall we? Both in the side story and from what we see in the small bits of her in the manga paint the picture of a woman who was incensed that Ai was more popular than her and now she wants to keep anyone else from rising higher than Ai ever did as we see with her words to Ruby. It’s obvious that she’s going to make some move on Ruby during Kana’s graduation concert or around that time so that’ll be her 

And then there’s her absolute dogshit motivation. Nino had a hand in killing Ai because Ai was more popular than her? I’m sorry, that is a literal skill issue. At the end of the day, the idol industry is still an industry. Those who have more potential or skill than another will obviously be more favored and reach higher. It’s not a slice of the dark side of the idol industry, it’s simple fucking causality. 

It’s the equivalent of an average student in high school that helps a group of students murder the smartest student in school and the only reason she helps them is that the smartest student is better than her academically so she has to die. That’s basically the gist of Nino’s reasons for wanting Ai’s death. It’s petty. It’s entitled. It's downright idiotic. I would even say it was character assassination were it not for the fact that she barely had any character in the first place. 

The third point is what Nino represents as the final antagonist of the series. I spoke before about how having her as the final boss is an incredibly tone-deaf narrative decision for a series that delves into the darkest parts of the industry. The narrative before these couple of chapters was pointing at Hikaru being the main and final antagonist of the series. This high up industry official who was also taken advantage of by the worst of the industry lashed out at Ai after she broke up with him and whose children find revenge on him by telling him that Ai loved him all along. It doesn’t absolve Hikaru’s sins and his hand in killing Ai but sidesteps the issue in favor of casting blame towards his circumstances caused by the industry. The concept sings, fits with the darker side of the industry the manga has been trying to grasp, and tries to wrap up everything in a neat little bow.

Nino has none of that backing. Ai’s last attempts at reconciliation with Nino were unceremoniously denied by her in her short story and she does not grow as a character because of it. She is not built up as a character who was sufficiently ruined by the industry the way Hikaru was or has the justification for her misdeeds. No, the true and final antagonist of the series is a woman who was jealous of Ai for upstaging her and because of that she helped orchestrate her death. This concept does not sing. It does not say anything substantial about the industry so far and does cohere in a way that justifies her being the final obstacle of the series. It’s a bad piece of social commentary and undercuts so much of what the series has been leaning towards for over a hundred and fifty chapters. The real villain of the series isn’t the industry itself, it’s the ones around you who are jealous of your success! Utter dogshit writing.

I can almost hear the complaints now. Niino showed up in the short story! She has tons of character depth there! Here’s a hard truth to swallow: It doesn’t matter. If you have to look at what is essentially supplemental media that not every reader will have read to get the gist of a character as important as the final antagonist of the series then you’ve failed in setting said character up to take the reins of the title of final antagonist. It’s like if you were watching a movie in a theater and this one character shows up during the last ten minutes as the real antagonist with little to no foreshadowing and she has an entire backstory and character that was shown in some supplemental material online that a good 90 percent of people haven’t even seen. That would lead to a box office bomb if I’ve ever seen one. You’d get thrown out of a Hollywood scriptwriter’s room for even proposing something like that! 

In any case, I’m very glad that the reactions of people online are finally turning on the writers for serving the readers this shitshow. With how people were talking about how the last two chapters were so good of all things I was quite surprised that there were still people around swallowing this shitshow on a plate uncritically because it’s more than obvious to my eyes that the manga is already spiraling downwards in terms of quality during these last few chapters.

It’s a shame, really. I wouldn’t still be doing these chapter reviews if I wasn’t invested in the series in the first place. Before the movie arc’s horrible pacing issues and the massive number of timeskips with these recent chapters I still held out hope that the series would give us a satisfying conclusion. Now I wouldn’t even be surprised if the next chapter just timeskipped us again to the graduation concert without dwelling on Nino as a final boss.