#like!!! liam makes him say things and im like 'HE WOULD NOT FUCKING SAY THAT'

[hatchetmode]

EATS CEMENT!!!!!!!!!! I HATE CRITICAL ROLE!!!!!

[livingemkayde]

waterfront

neighbor!joel miller/dbf!joel miller x f!reader

Warnings: Rated 18+. CONSIDER THIS YOUR FUCKING COMMUNITY LABEL LOL. Minors please dni. Smut. unprotected p in v. age gap. Pet names. Dirty talk. Dom!joel. Oblivious ass reader's dad. Not proof read one bit (per usual). 

a/n: thank you so much for the recent love. you guys are honestly so funny - COMMENT ASK REQUEST PLEASE INTERACT WITH ME IM SO LONELY ON HERE. this lil mini series has really pushed me to write despite some…things (and by things—i actually have been getting a shit ton of hate on my din fic for some weird reason?? so im really happy this dbf corner of tumblr is very accepting cuz that was really making me feel…SAD LMFAO). also do you guys picture joel in this fic as game joel or hbo joel - i wanna know. please enjoy this token of my gratitude as always. 

wc: 4.5k

this is apart of my small dbf!joel mini series, read the previous parts here:

part i part ii

if you would like to read more of mine: masterlist!

“Fuck, Joel,” you mutter when you finally relax around him, your tight walls flutter at the feeling of his cock moving halfway out of you. When he pushes back in you see stars.  “That’s right honey —fuck— so good for me,” he pants, bottoming out again and setting a slow pace that punches each breath out of you. “Teasin’ me all day—couldn’t fuckin’ wait any longer.” 

“Sweetie? Have you seen the sunblock?” 

“Yeah dad, in the back bathroom!” you yell back from your room. 

It’s honestly unbelievable. 

Packing. 

You’re packing. 

For a weekend getaway at some beach house property one of Joel’s client’s offered him for the weekend.

Joel’s client. 

Joel Miller.

Who got down on his knees for you at your graduation barbecue. Who fingered you in the front seat of his pick-up truck when your dad was looking for you. 

Who refused to talk to you after that. Not like you were trying anyways. This had to stop. Especially since you and Liam have been talking more and he’s…nice. Boring—sure. But he’s what’s good for you. 

He even got you a job at some hardware store on the other side of town. 

Liam was keeping you company—no—keeping you busy. But not enough to stop the incessant thoughts of your middle aged neighbor who is—even worse—probably your dad’s only close friend. 

You tried to keep your distance. For your sake and Joel’s. You don’t want to know what’s going on in his mind anymore. All you know is he continually runs laps around yours. 

You can’t shake how he looked at the barbecue. How the sea of people parted for him like he was Moses, greeting him with strong handshakes and acrylic nails wrapping around his bicep. But even worse, you can’t stop thinking about how through all those people—he found your eyes first. 

You tried to convince yourself that maybe Joel was thinking the same thing you were. That this—whatever it is—was actually fucking ridiculous and had to stop. 

Because it did have to stop. But it never felt ridiculous to you, as much as you will yourself to believe. 

You tried to convince yourself that much when your hand was down your pants in the middle of the night. Something sounding a lot like Joel’s name on the tip of your tongue as you made yourself come. 

You aren’t sure if your dad has seen much of him either—saying something about how he was booked through the fourth of July weekend with a huge project he was working on with his brother. 

That’s why you were shocked when your dad came up to your room with a grin explaining he counted you in on the weekend getaway with Joel, Sarah, and the two of you. 

You were excited to see more of Sarah — she had really grown up in the time you were away. But with Sarah comes Joel, and you aren’t sure if the butterflies in your stomach were from anxiety or anticipation at that thought. 

A half a day after your dad told you to get packing, you’re in the backseat of Joel’s truck, Sarah at your side, while she talks everyone's ear off about something. You aren’t really paying attention because Joel can’t stop stealing glances at you in the rear view mirror—and let's be honest. You can’t stop either. 

“—so then she said to me that it was my fault. I mean can you believe that?” Sarah slaps your arm gently while finishing her story. 

She looks around the car for approval and the dads just shrug their shoulders. You give her a sympathetic look. 

“Sorry Sarah, sounds crazy,” you say, grabbing her hand. You—honest to god—tried to pay attention but there were so many names thrown out you couldn’t keep up. It didn’t help that the man in the driver's seat kept you up at night—almost every night—since the barbecue. 

“I know! But then Jackson was like okay with it so whatever,” she gives you a knowing look, finishing her story—don’t say anything else because my dad’s here.

“Boys,” your dad murmurs to Joel under his breath, but you catch it. 

You also catch Joel shaking his head in response, letting out a huff and a—

“Tell me ‘bout it.” 

You meet his eye through the rear view mirror and drop his gaze quickly. His knuckles go white on the steering wheel. 

You think you’re almost off the hook and maybe can get some rest but Sarah lets out the first of many—

“Are we almost there yet?” 

Four more of those and you arrive at a secluded beach house on the coast. Joel pulls up to the back of the house, you can see the deck which leads down to the beach. Sarah and your dad hop out of the truck hastily—excited to see the house, and enter through the back door. It leaves you and Joel in the car together. Alone, for a few uncomfortable seconds until he finally speaks. 

“You alright?” 

It throws you for a loop. Joel Miller asking if you’re okay? You must be dying. You look at him through the mirror, an eyebrow raising. 

“‘M fine,” you reply back, monotone.

“Do you wanna talk?” 

Another surprise. 

“There’s nothing to talk about. You made that clear,” you huff, putting an emphasis on you so maybe he can start to feel an ounce of what you do. 

He gets out of the car but you don’t move from your position. Your dad and Sarah have disappeared into the house, undoubtedly claiming the best bedrooms and rifling through the owner’s things. 

He opens your door, his hand hanging off the top of it while his other braces himself on the car near your head. He dips his head closer to you, taking up the entirety of the door frame. 

“You gonna be a brat this whole trip?” His drawl, rich and velvety, almost tricks you into leaning up to kiss him, but you snap out of it from his words. The name shouldn’t make you clench your thighs together like it does. You opt for anger over letting him see what he does to you.

“I’m the brat?” You bite back. He’s not going to do this again. If it’s your last dying wish, Joel Miller will learn a lesson this trip. For leaving you high and dry. For being a fucking asshole, just like you told him at the barbecue a couple days ago.

“You think parading that lil boy ‘round here s’okay?”

“Again with Liam? It’s not any of your business.” 

You look at him. Really look at him—and there’s a certain emotion behind his eyes you can’t place. Like he’s biting his tongue, and you know he is.

“What, Joel? God,” you say, exasperated. 

“Nothin’—I—” he pauses like he’s trying to collect his thoughts before speaking. Then he says something that surprises you—like maybe he really does care about you and what happened in his truck. 

“He make you laugh?” 

You stare at him, shocked, and you can’t help but soften your gaze. You feel like bursting into a puddle of tears—but what’s even worse—you feel like running into his arms. 

“He doesn’t make me cry.” 

He looks down at that. Like he’s defeated. 

“I told you I care,” he throws his words back in your face. From when he had his tongue buried inside you. 

You roll your eyes. 

“What? You think I want it like this?” He continues when you don’t respond.

“I have no fucking idea what you want.” 

“I want to not be sneaking around behind my friend’s back. Your dad’s back.”

“Didn’t stop you before.”

He pushes off the car at that, putting his hands on his hips while scoffing to himself. You think you catch him mumbling something and before you can bite your tongue you urge him to speak up. 

“Insane,” he grunts.

“Sorry?” 

“I said you drive me fuckin’ insane.” 

You pause at that. Partially because his tone suggests it’s not the typical insane but like he can’t stay away from you. Like you drive him up the walls. Like he can’t stop thinking about you. Maybe even the kind of insane he makes you feel. Maybe it's the same thing he does to you. And you didn’t know you did…anything to Joel. 

“That’s my job,” you reply sarcastically instead of saying something stupid—or something you regret. 

You break his gaze—looking down to unlatch your seatbelt. When your hand goes to click the button, you stay fiddling with it; the latch fails to come out of the buckle. 

“‘S jammed. Need to get a repair,” he reaches over you to unlatch it himself. 

But you don’t get your hand out of the way quick enough and your fingers meet over the button. 

He pauses, you both do. The contact makes your head spin. 

You think he’s going to pull away. An apology is already braced on your tongue but instead of moving or retracting, he tentatively rubs your hand with his thumb instead, lacing his fingers through yours like it’s second nature. 

He’s in your space, and he smells like Joel, and you don’t think the two of you have ever shared a more intimate moment. Not even when his mouth was between your legs. 

You look up at him, hesitant, because you aren’t sure what’s going to be looking back. But he stares at you, his eyes soft. Joel looks down to your lips and back up to your eyes. His brow twitches a bit. You let out soft pants—the peaks of your breasts threaten to ghost against his chest. 

He looks at your lips again and inches closer, starting to duck his head. 

“‘M sorry,” he grumbles in a low, dangerous drawl that shoots right up your spine. 

You don’t think it’s a phrase he says often. You’ve never heard it. It sounds foreign on his lips, especially when they’re inching closer to yours. 

“For what?” You squeak out, a breath cutting through your words. 

“Everythin’.” 

Your eyes urge him to continue. 

“Thought I could stay away f’m you.” 

He gets closer. 

“Thought it was the right thing.” 

You shake your head. 

“But I don’t think I can stay away.” 

“Don’t stay away. Don’t go,” you plead with him and shake your head. All of your plans to make him pay have honestly gone out the window. But when he says things like that and he really—honest to god—means them? You know you’re fucked. 

“'M here.” 

You close your eyes at his words and will your tears back when they close. All you can smell is Joel and all you can feel is his hand coming up to loosely wrap around your throat, the curve of his palm hugging your collar bone. 

“Look at me.” In a blink, you do. 

He’s closer, if possible. 

And he kisses you. It’s the first time he’s ever kissed you. It’s not tentative, or aggressive.

This kiss feels like the real apology. Not him on his knees for you and then ignoring you after. He kisses like he’s willing you to forgive him. You know he’s not good with words—that’s why this kiss feels like the heartbreak that had settled in your chest is scattering. It feels like your old fantasies and butterflies breaching the surface are making you moan into his mouth. 

He kisses you like a man starved, but also like he’s scared of messing up again. 

It feels fucking good—he feels fucking good. 

His hand on your throat lengthens your neck to deepen the kiss. Your hands find his bicep and squeeze the life out of him. 

His other hand pulls at the hem of your shirt and almost ghosts the skin of your stomach but the sound of a door slamming snaps you both out of it. Joel turns to see Sarah pushing out of the patio door with her back turned towards you, carrying towels and a cooler. He quickly unbuckles your seatbelt with dexterous fingers, helping you out of the car.

You act like you were helping him unload the flatbed when Sarah turns around—a big smile cast on her face.

“Get your bikini on! Let’s go!” She looks at you and nods towards the ocean over her stack of beach supplies. 

“Alright, alright, I’m going.” 

You hustle into the house with a duffle slung over your shoulder. You can see your dad in the kitchen rifling through the pantry—the cooler for drinks and food abandoned on the floor near the fridge. 

You find a bathroom and change into your swimsuit quickly. You don’t miss the wet spot on your panties. From a kiss nonetheless. You’re beginning to think you’re way more fucked than either you or Joel like to believe. 

You rush out onto the patio. Sarah is probably shoulder deep in the water and it’s way too fucking hot to be sitting under the sun without taking a dip. You haven’t been to a nice beach like this in a really long time. You don’t remember the last time you went on vacation. 

This is nice.  

Joel is being way too…nice. 

You pass him on the way to the beach where you see Sarah jumping through the water. He looks at you, subtly. Out of the corner of his eye. You try to avoid his gaze and hide your blush but you can feel his burning eyes shift to the back of your head as you give him a small smile in passing. 

“Dad! C’mon let's go!” Sarah yells from the water. You look to see Joel staring back at you—you drop his eye when your dad busts through the door. 

“‘N a minute!” Joel grumbles as he throws his duffle over his shoulder, carting in a crate of barbecue things for the weekend. 

Your flip flops splat on the deck as you break into a small jog down to where Sarah is. She smiles at you as you run into the water. The two of you playing in the salty spring like teenagers—well she is—you aren’t. 

You can see your dad and Joel settle on beach chairs some yards away from the shoreline. They sport a couple beers and talk amongst themselves while watching you and Sarah play in the water. 

You catch Joel’s eye a couple times. He even comes down and throws around a football with your dad. He splashes and teases you all day. 

When the sun finally extends down to the horizon and the water turns orange from its light, Sarah tells you she’s beat and basically hobbles back over to the dads on the beach chairs. She slumps down onto the one next to Joel, you move towards them as well, trying not to blush because you know Joel is looking at you before you meet his eyes. 

“Tired?” Joel asks, not to you or Sarah in particular, but it falls on you—Sarah already asleep on the beach chair. 

“Exhausted.” You plop down on the chair beside your dad, taking a towel and drying your hair off before moving to the rest of your body. 

“Want dinner? I’ll make my burgers,” your dad inquires, beginning to stand and take the beers with him. 

“Sounds good dad.” You stand and wrap the towel around your body. “Need a shower.”

You try to wake Sarah up gently, she grumbles and stalks off to the house, you, trailing behind her. She kicks her flip flops off at the entrance and moves to the couch in the living room. She’s back asleep before you get the chance to enter the door. 

Your dad moves to the kitchen, you don’t know where Joel went. Maybe you left him back on the beach. You move to take a cold shower, the small tug in your stomach grew to be quite big when you caught him staring at your exposed skin on the beach. 

When you get upstairs, you enter your designated bedroom. You smile when you realize it has a bathroom attached to it. You strip off your bathing suit, putting it in the sink of your bathroom. 

You wrap a towel around your body and go to twist the knob of your shower. When you tug it towards hot it comes off the shower wall with a chink and you curse to yourself, the water coming out in a leak rather than a stream. 

You huff. This is not what you need right now. 

“Dad!” You call from the doorway of your bedroom—not wanting to venture further in just a towel. 

You turn away from the door—moving into the bathroom, trying to chance figuring out how to fix it instead, when a pair of footsteps fall by your bedroom door. 

“You okay?” A voice calls from your bedroom, but it’s not your dads. 

You jump at the sound of a honey rich southern drawl echoing your name as Joel pushes through the bathroom door to find you in your towel, holding the shower handle.

“Jesus—” he looks away with a cough, you can tell he’s shocked to see you in just a towel. But when he sees you holding the handle he does a double take. 

“What the hell did y’do?” He flips between giving you privacy and moving toward you with an outstretched hand, taking the shower handle into his own. 

“I just tried to turn it on and it snapped off,” you try to reason with him, a flush coming to your cheeks when he comes into the bathroom. 

“Move,” he grumbles, sneaking by you. In the brief moment you come chest to chest, you look up at him and he lets out a groan. His hand snakes by your waist. He looks down at you—a dangerous look in his eyes. 

Joel breaks first, moving towards the shower. 

“I’m gonna—yeah—just…uh thanks,” you gesture to your towel and shut the door to the bathroom behind you. Leaving Joel in there alone. 

You throw on an oversized t-shirt and underwear before he comes out, sans shower handle. 

“Thanks,” you mumble, suddenly self conscious you didn’t have time to put on pants. You aren’t sure why. Joel’s seen…a lot already. 

“‘Course,” he says, but doesn’t leave like you anticipated. 

“You havin’ fun?” He asks. There’s something in his tone that suggests he doesn’t actually care. 

“Yeah,” you reply, breathless, “Thanks for inviting us.”  

“sorry—I—” he points to the bathroom, “thought you were in trouble or somethin’.” 

“‘S’okay.” 

He looks at you, and down to your bare legs, your underwear just peeking out from beneath your shirt’s hem. 

The way Joel looks at you—like you’re the only one who matters—stokes the fire growing in your stomach. The look in his eyes tells you he’s still wrestling with his moral compass. Like he needs to stay away for his own good, but like he said in the car—he just can’t. 

Joel nods, and steps back like he’s turning to leave. You don’t want him to. You need him. When you take a tentative step toward him, he suddenly breaks into stride in your direction. The dam of fleeting touches and wandering eyes for half a day breaks. He grabs your face in his hands, kissing you hard. His tongue slips to run over your bottom lip and you whine into his mouth. 

Your hands come up to rest on his chest. His, wrapping around your waist while he dips his head to start kissing your neck.

“Joel–” you start, but the feeling of his lips on the sensitive parts of your collarbone punches your breath.

He only hums at that sentiment. 

“Where are we going?” you manage to get out, when he’s tugging you into the bathroom by your wrist, shutting the door behind him. 

“Need to fuck you,” he groans into your ear as he spins you around, so your hips press into the bathroom counter. You can look into the mirror and see your reflection. You look entirely too fucked out from a couple kisses and he looks stone cold. 

“J-Joel—ah—jesus,” you moan when his hand dips to your front and catches your clit through cotton. 

“Say please,” he groans into the skin of your neck. You turn your head to catch his lips in a chaste kiss. It's all tongue and teeth, but you don’t mind either way. He’s close, he’s here and he’s kissing you. 

You break away from the kiss just enough to whine out a small, “Please–fuck–”

You don’t really know what you’re asking for, but you know if that’s what he wants—you’d give him anything in this particular moment. 

“Nicer.” 

You whine, the pad of his finger catches your clit just right.

“Please, Joel,” you cut out through bated breath. 

He huffs, you can hear the sound of clinking and shuffling behind you—the tell tale sign of his belt coming undone. 

“Alright, baby, c’mon,” he pushes you down, folds you in half, your breasts pressed against marble. It's cold, and his hot hands on your waist, snaking down to slot his fingers in your underwear makes you dizzy. 

“You’re a tease,” he groans when he eases your underwear to the side, the head of his cock catches your clit.

“Joel—p—fuck—” His cock catches at your entrance. You both pause for a second, reveling in the feeling. One of his hands grips your waist so hard you’re sure you’ll have bruises by dinnertime. The other pushes your face down—fingers tangling in your hair. 

“Look in the mirror,” he growls, lifting your head up by your hair, just enough so you can watch his face as his tip slips past your entrance. 

He stretches you out just from that, you muffle down a scream in your throat. 

Joel’s mouth goes slack but he doesn’t react much with his face. He just looks down at your bodies connecting and pants while he slowly slides home. 

“‘S big Joel. Feel so good—oh my god—” he breaks you open and splits you in two. His breath cuts somewhere behind your head—your eyes squeezing shut at the feeling. 

He buries himself to the hilt, you curse and mutter inconsistencies into the bathroom. His iron grip on your body goes tighter if possible. 

“Eyes open,” he growls behind you. “You can take it baby, c’mon.” 

You will open your eyes, focusing on him in the mirror. He has a sheen of sweat already casing his forehead, his shirt is half unbuttoned with his sleeves rolled up to his elbows. 

“Relax, angel,” he pants. “You’re squeezing me — could barely get it in,” 

He settles there, you try to relax but the stretch makes you squirm underneath him. He lets you adjust to his length, cursing every time you clench around him. It’s filthy. Obscene. He’s pushing your head up — lifting you by your hair, so you can see him spear into you with no remorse. He’s filthy, and so are you. 

“Fuck, Joel,” you mutter when you finally relax around him, your tight walls flutter at the feeling of his cock moving halfway out of you. When he pushes back in you see stars. 

“That’s right honey —fuck— so good for me,” he pants, bottoming out again and setting a slow pace that punches each breath out of you. “Teasin’ me all day—couldn’t fuckin’ wait any longer.” 

“More please,” you whine, meeting his eye in the mirror. The air is thick in the bathroom now, the potpourri on the sill of the window doesn’t really mask much of anything. 

He complies—surprisingly. Moving faster and harder, each push of his hips knocks you into the counter. The grip on your waist gets impossibly tight. The hand pulling at your hair finally lets you rest back down on the counter, pushing hair out of your face when you look back at him. It rests on the back of your neck. 

“Feel so good baby,” he groans. 

“Joel—I’m—I can’t, I’m gonna—” 

“C’mon angel, come for me,” he says, you take another peak at him through the mirror. He looks wrecked. But you look even worse. 

You get impossibly tight around him while he mutters things you can’t hear over the ringing in your ears. You think you hear him toss out a small that’s right when you finally spill over the edge. 

He fucks you through it, his pace doesn’t let up, the coldness of the counter brings you back to reality. Where his breaths are becoming groans and pants and he strokes your cheek with his thumb. 

“‘Nother,” is all he says when your tight walls finally relax, molding to him and only him. 

“I–I can’t—” you say, slumped against the counter. You sound cock drunk. It’s halfway true though. No one else has ever made you come twice in one night. You were starting to think it might be a myth. 

“Know you can, pretty girl,” he goes slow at that, angling down so the tip of his cock catches something inside you that lights the fire again. “There we go. ‘S okay, can feel it already.” 

He pushes you towards another orgasm, it washes over your entire body and you slump against the counter. Maybe it’s some sort of weird trance he has you in. Or maybe you were right and this — whatever it is — is getting bad. Fast. You’re threatening to fall. But he’s there, and he picks you up and holds you down. 

“Jesus. Fuck, baby,” he curses into your skin when your release coats his cock and lets him sink deeper, thrust faster, push harder. 

“Joel—fuck. Fuck.” Maybe the overstimulation should be getting to you, but you stay there like that, as he speeds up and his thrusts become more frantic. He chases after his own orgasm. 

“Turn over,” he says, hastily. His hands move at your body before you can process his words. He flips you around and slots himself in between your legs—sliding back in deep, grinding into you while folding over so his head is in the crook of your neck. 

“Please,” you whimper. You both know what you’re asking for. But he pulls out, ripping your shirt up and spilling all over your stomach and breasts. It coats you, the liquid hot and he dips his head to watch it coat your body. He lets out a strangled string of curses, bracing himself on the counter as he comes. 

He kisses you. Really kisses you. You grab his face and moan into it. Like you’re willing him to stay there, in between your legs forever. 

But he breaks first, moving to grab a towel out of the cabinet above the toilet. He cleans you up gently, wetting the towel with warm water before it touches your skin. The sentiment could make you cry. 

When he’s done cleaning you up, he kisses your forehead. Joel wraps his arms around you as you sling yours over his shoulders. He holds you there, his hand coming to cup the back of your head, stroking your hair and breathing hot kisses into your crown. You smile, lazily. 

He pulls back just enough to look at you. You know you still look wrecked and are in desperate need of a shower—he looks perfect by contrast, completely untouched and definitely unbothered. 

“Dangerous,” he mutters when you look at him through your lashes. 

You kiss him instead of responding.

You know Joel's right—this is dangerous. 

But it feels way too good to stop. 

_

part iv

taglist! (comment or message me if you would like to be added) kisses to you all:

@nostalxgic @iluvurfather

[em-harlsnow]

i was just watching a new trend that's going on rn that people tell their partners "i wasn't satisfied with your performance last night" and it reminded me of you it'd be so funny if mickey tell ian that lol

Okau so i looked for this one everywhere, but i couldn’t find a good example so i’ll have to make it up as i go!

So Mickey starts getting annoyed. ian’s just constantly having this little laugh to himself about these stupid toktik clock trends, and mickey’s sick of it.

he thinks for a while about how to get ian back, and decides that the best way would be to give him a taste of his own medicine.

by downloading toktik, which is apparently tiktok.

at first it’s very weird, and it takes a while for him to understand how the app works. when he does, he searches ‘couple prank’ into the search bar, remembering the point of this whole thing.

the second one he sees is interesting, so he resolves to try it.

they’re eating breakfast, ian absentmindedly typing on his phone. he’s probably looking for more ways to confuse mickey with those stupid trends.

he swallows the food in his mouth.

“you know last night?” mickey says.

“yeahh” ian responds, only looking up from his phone to smirk.

“yeah, i wasn’t really satisfied with your performance, man.” he tells him, then gets up and puts his plate in the sink.

it takes a moment to register, but when it does it’s exactly what mickey expected.

“what?” ian whips around.

mickey just shrugs.

“what do you mean you weren’t satisfied? i was great!” he rises from the table, waving his arms around.

mickey tries to contain his laughter. “i dunno about that. i think you’re losing your touch.”

ian gapes like a fish out of water. “losing my- no! no i’m fucking not!”

“uhuh, sure.”

“what the fuck, mickey! do you even remember last night?”

“‘course i do. which is why im saying this.”

ian presses closer, squinting at him to see if he’s lying. “last night was good.”

“sure it was tough guy.”

mickey can see ian’s brows furrow as he gets more and more annoyed. last night was good, which is probably why he’s so confused.

“well, what was wrong with it? i’m sure i can improve.” ian tells him, immediately switching to horny and annoyed instead of just annoyed.

“you didn’t last very long.”

“what?! were you even there last night?!” he rages, taking his hands off of mickey.

in response, mickey just laughs.

“please, i killed you in two seconds.”

“you- wait, what?” ian stutters, suddenly even more confused.

“i said i killed you in two seconds. you’re shitty at video games.”

ian blinks a few times, putting two and two together. “you weren’t satisfied with my performance last night in liam’s shitty fortnight game?” he says, outraged.

“yeah. what’d you think i was talking about?” he asks, playing dumb.

ian seems to catch on. “you’re such an ass.”

“dunno what you’re talking about.” mickey shrugs, barely containing his laughter.

when ian grabs him again and places him on the counter roughly, he’s not exactly surprised.

<3

hope it lived up to expectations!

—-> send me tiktok trends and i’ll write a fic!

[pinazee]

And down the stretch comes murder

I wanted to take this moment to highlight the adorable child actors they got- Liam James and Carlos McCullers II. They are so perfectly cast as Shawn and Gus and they do such an amazing job! Im so impressed by them 👏👏

The whole spitball incident really highlights the differences between Shawn and Gus’ ethics. Shawn feels guilty for thinking he got the wrong spitter and ruined Jimmys life while Gus actually did it and feels no remorse at all. Perhaps it’s because Jimmy tortured Gus more, but it’s also come up a few other times i believe, that Gus is not above revenge nor is always willing to do the right thing if it interferes with his safety or his own code of justice, whereas with Shawn it’s like he can’t rest until he’s made things right. This, in addition to the ways he looks out for people (helping Lassie solve a case without him knowing, helping juliet find some kids without getting paid, standing between Gus and a gun), I think is why i tend to be more drawn to Shawn. I love tender-hearted morally just characters. Im not saying he’s always riding the high horse (pun intended), simply that at the end of the day you know he’s going to do the right thing. Don’t get me wrong, i love a morally ambiguous character too, and if I’m honest Gus’s outlook is certainly more realistic, but if i had to pick a favorite, i want the reliably good and wholesome over the self-serving. Not that im saying Gus is selfish at all, but of the two Shawns more our hero, even compared to his own cop father. I think Juliet is the only one who comes closest to matching that above and beyond heroism. I think the only reason she’s a step below is because Shawn simply notices others more. Thats all. If Juliet had Shawns abilities she’d be just as on top of it as him, probably more so. Actually she might get overwhelmed by seeing it all and not being able to help everyone. I think it’d be really hard for her to ignore sometimes. Which, okay I’m going down a tangent, but do you think Shawn had to learn to shut it off sometimes or like, learn to walk away? Cause i imagine day to day Shawn’s seeing people dealing with grief, abuse, or pain and with as kind as he is, it must be hard for him to ignore. Like if you’ve ever seen Daredevil, I’m imagining a less dramatic version of that haha

Henry will take any opportunity to point out Shawns failings or try to make him feel less than. Shawn tells him he’s there for a case and instead of asking him about it, Henry goes right back into you never could be a good handicapper because you lack the patience and follow-through it takes to put the time in and research. Also, the line “i let him talk to me” just doesn’t sit right with me even if the guy did turn out to be a skeeve. This kind of stuff makes me think Shawn either learned how to respect people from his mother or refused to treat people like his father. Probably both, though i hate to give her credit for anything haha

Look at his smile when he sees Lassie feed the horse. He’s so warmly amused by him. I wasn’t a Shassie shipper originally (as i just didn’t ship ppl in ye olden days) but i think I am now. I see it guys, I get it haha

These scenes are what makes the episode for me! I love them! We get to see both Shawns interacting and how he utilizes his vast memory, taking a peak into his mind palace so to speak. Plus he literally answered that common question of if you could go back in time what would you tell your younger self? (“Think big!”) I know they never really intended for this to be like a deep scene (nor expected certain fans to overanalyze it haha) but i like how he approaches the kid version of himself with a certain degree of amusement. Like I imagine if i was seeing my young self I’d probably be rolling my eyes at my sheer stupidity, but Shawns a lot kinder to himself haha Also little Shawns line “I thought I’d be bald by 20” was fucking gold! I wish I had better words for why this works so well but all i have is that it does and its brilliant.

Nice try Psych, your Canada is showing ;)

Heres some completely irrelevant info. The difference between a dreamcicle and a creamcicle: both are orange flavored, but dreamsicles had an ice milk center while a creamsicle was ice cream. And dreamsicles are no longer made.

I like this addition to the background. Its so cute. (Sidenote: this screenshot makes it seem like Shawn is the babyfaced assassin)

P.S This is the second episode ive seen him hold this frog. That is all.

[farklelucas]

okay so. now that ive taken some time to breathe, compose myself, and gather my thoughts, lemme lay out why the teen wolf movie was a hot holy mess (besides, you know, the obvious) as a teen wolf enthusiast and expert.

a lot of the characters were really little more than set dressing. to be specific, i think liam could have been replaced by a mailbox with a hat and the movie would have been the same (and this is coming from a major liam fan). the same can be said for mason, malia, melissa, peter, and honestly even the sheriff (which i hate bc god he was such a core of the show). i think parrish was only useful in one specific instance and even that isn't enough to warrant him being in the film. the characters i loved felt like cardboard cutouts and that wasnt fair to me, to the characters, or to the actors. i would have rather they not been there at all tbh. like just leave liam out of this if youre gonna do him like that fr

a lot of the plot points felt... disjointed and weird. saraid said it felt like three different movies in one and i have to agree. derek and eli felt like its own thing, then scott and allison, and then everything else (whatever the hell parrish and malia had going on, the lydia and jackson buddy cop comedy, liam in... japan with a ramen shop i think? and some random girlfriend that happened to be a kitsune) kind of fell to the wayside in between.

this movie was truly so flat without kira. it was hard to make a nogitsune movie without stiles, but it was almost impossible to make without her. hikari unfortunately ended up just feeling like a woman they randomly shoved into all the plot points kira was supposed to be in. because she didnt have a character besides liams girlfriend (and because liam was barely a character himself), she just couldn't compare and so kiras lack of presence was really felt. she left a huge hole in the narrative. they didnt even mention her and you knew what was missing. if you had cut khylin and dylan sprayberrys checks entirely, im sure they would have had enough to pay her as much as the rest of her white coworkers :) but that's just my opinion xxx

this was supposed to be for fans of the original series, but really just felt like jeff davis's weird rare pair fanfiction. instead of focusing on the dynamics that already existed - melissa and the sheriff, malia and peter, scott and liam, derek and. anyone really - he ended up delving into all these new dynamics with only two hours to develop them. malia and parrish (which. i really had to mentally run through the show to see if those two had interacted before and i dont think they have), liam and hikari, and derek and eli. all of which had a shot at being interesting but because there were so many different plots going on, it all just felt. awkward and confusing.

that being said, im gonna move onto derek and eli generally. i like eli! i do. i thought he was funny, i thought the actor was super charming (although the timeline made no sense because if he was born fifteen years ago And allison died fifteen years ago he would be braedens and. hate to say it folks. thats not braedens baby. make him mixed jeff davis you fucking coward). really, i liked him. ... but not at the expense of dereks character. the derek i knew was an asshole. he was mean, he was sarcastic, he was a bastard (honorifically). its not to say that people cant change, but... the derek i saw in the movie was a complete 180 from the derek we last saw in the series. honestly, the derek i saw in the series probably wouldn't have made a good parent - we saw how he was with erica, isaac, and boyd. even with scott. derek was kind of a dick. i dont even think he would have wanted kids - i think he would raise them out of duty, and i think he would if a partner wanted him to. but i dont think kids were ever in his life plan. and i think that could have been super interesting to see with him and eli. i think making him a parent could have been really interesting and it just. crumbled.

i know i mentioned the timeline in that last bit but. the timeline. it hurts my head. when was eli born. what year is it. how long has it been since scott has been in beacon hills. im so confused.

lets talk about adrian harris. shall we. i have made a list of people who i think would have been a better villain reveal are you ready: allison, peter, theo, chris argent, kate argent (resurrected), matt daehler (resurrected), victoria argent (resurrected), kira herself, danny mahealani, rafe mccall, isaac's shit dad, coach, greenberg, me with a baseball bat filled with rusty nails, jeff davis in a wig. the list goes on. you could not have picked a more random and less memorable character to reveal as your villain. i almost felt like i was being mocked. "haha! you didnt expect it to be this guy? the chemistry teacher who also died fifteen years ago? who had almost nothing to do with the plot until season 3? stupid! idiot!" i have never been so mad in my life

speaking of villain. did they forget what a nogitsune is. it needs a host. its not some guy they can stab to death. its a concept, a feeling, a parasite. its a manifestation of mental illness. but no sorry excuse me i must be wrong bc now its also a werewolf??????? im sorry. am i the crazy one. give me void allison! give me allison as the host and shes being taken over and she has those bags under her eyes and that creepy void stare and grin! give me crystal reed emmy noms! while we're on the subject, heres some more questions about the nogitsune include: why was it in a jar? why was it with LIAM of all people (who didnt even know what that was)? why did its powers completely change? HOW was it a werewolf????????? i cant stop thinking about it.

i said it once and ill say it again: jackson fucking carried this movie. he was giving all season one jackson, he was bringing comic relief, he was even bringing up ethan when no one else would! king! he carried. but he shouldn't have had to. dont get me wrong, i think crystal reed ate and left no crumbs. this was allisons movie and it should have been. but when the other two standout characters imo were jackson (who arguably did nothing) and coach (who did even less)... you simply didnt use your characters well. i think i would put deaton up there and even chris, but... scott and lydia? this should have been their movie. but scott spent nearly the whole movie ignoring his friends, and lydia was reduced to 'woman whose plot was about a man,' again. it was horrible. lydia outgrew that song and dance by season two. and scott? hasnt been to beacon hills in twelve years? hasnt seen his mom or his friends? not the scott mccall i know.

this is not about shipping discourse this post will never be about shipping discourse so i say this as a completely objective party. that being said. st/dia was so strangely shoved in there at the end. how did harris even know about lydia leaving stiles. how did he know about her dream. how did it add to the plot. like yes the nogitsune feeds of chaos and strife but i think lydia was getting enough of that watching her friends get murdered. it felt like a weird way to explain why dob wasnt there and it simply didnt work. i would have rather they not said anything about stiles at all.

anyway, this is skipping over a lot of other little things that i thought were really bad (sexualizing malia who literally had the mentality of an eight year old for most of her life AGAIN, why was mason a fucking cop, peters lack of interaction with the hale family which is what made him interesting in the first place, the absolute insanity of allison coming back to life and just being absolutely okay even though shes been dead for fifteen years, died at the hands of her friend, and almost everyone she knew including stiles, isaac, and kira are all just gone now), but boy oh boy. for a while it was funny bad. like "oh this is bad but i can still enjoy this for what it is" bad. but those last ten minutes. what is actually absolutely wrong with jeff davis. there are very few times ive felt this betrayed by tv shows i held this close to my heart, but im there. im heartbroken. i wont go on about it here, bc honestly, it would need its own post considering how much i have to say. but if the rest of the movie was bad? that was shit was traumatizing.

anyway. so sorry this post is this long, and so sorry i couldnt come back with a positive review. this show died long ago; i think we should have just let it rest - nobody asked for a reunion, and now i can see that was with good reason. so the next time jeff davis opens up an email with a header titled 'sequel idea' and he ccs tyler posey, i think we should all just agree to ler arden cho beat him to death in a dennys parking lot instead.

[yanderu-deredere]

could you please write something about a darling worried about being too clingy? boyfriends always ask me to loosen up, that i need to give them room to breathe, that im too clingy often. id w9nder how your ocs would deal with a darling that has decided that this relationship will be different! even though she wants to be clingy, she tries her best not to!

a/n: another grouped up thing LOL! if you want more specific ones, send the request again and i'd be happy to rewrite it! thank youu for the request!

also, this request is Big Mood™ and i relate so so much to this. anon, i want you to know that you're not clingy. you're not too much. and you should never settle for someone who doesn't enjoy being around you, okay? there will be someone out there that will love you in all your wonderful gorgeous clinginess.

you belong to them and, last they checked, they weren't telling you to doubt yourself, were they? if you ever come to them with your concerns or they ever notice you pulling away, they'll address it immediately. in their minds, they own your entire being and, if they haven't told you anything about hating how you act, you should use your pretty little brain to worry about other things. plus, they'd like a clingier darling anyway because it shows how dedicated you are to them and it reminds them that you really are all theirs.

liam, fujio, ayaka, mel, ryouta

awww, poor baby. they'd definitely reassure you that it's fine, that they prefer their darling to be clingy. if you ever give them room to breathe, they'll just pull you back in. they don't want space! they want you all over them 24/7! and, of course, anyone who told you that you were too much suddenly disappear. but that's not something you should be concerned with! what you should be concerned with is them; paying attention to them, being glued to them, always being near them. that's what they want and they'll make sure you never forget it

gavin, ryuu, soren, casimir

what? clingy? you haven't been clingy at all! in fact, they'd tell you that you're not clingy enough! they'd be a bit shy to tell you but they'll steel their voice and try their hardest to come off confident and sure. they want to reassure you that they love you, that you're theirs and they're yours and there's nothing in the world they'd love more than for you to lower your walls for them. they want you to treat their relationship like home. they want you to be comfortable, happy, safe, warm. their love for you is unconditional, darling, so be as clingy as you want, okay?

gawain, yeong-bae, eun-jeong, emm, isamu

Yeah, bitch, you are clingy and it is annoying. Is that what you want him to say? Shut the fuck up! If he thought you were too clingy, he would've told you! Don't fucking thing he's some passive aggressive asshole that would imply things instead of just being straight with you. He loves you for you, in all of your entirety, and he'll literally be so pissed off if you even think about holding something about you back, no matter how small you think it is. And, anyway, he's the clingier one of the two of you so he doesn't know what the fuck you're talking about.

leonard

[thecavernsabove]

okay now i just want to talk about my expectations versus why i have ended up liking certain characters because i am just so intrigued by everything these people and characters do. for bells hells, i went into it knowing i would love ashton because they are the reason I started watching, i didn't think i would really latch onto any other character, apart from maybe fearne because she's a satyr and i am particularly partial to satyrs, and imogen because i mean it's laura bailey!

but what actually happened, is that yes i did get super attached to ashton of course i did, but my top three quickly became ashton, orym and laudna (and as someone who started being able to watch live at the split you can imagine how devastated i was). and recently chetney is really creeping up there. i do love all the characters dearly though.

ashton just reminds me of myself so much, apart from the fact that they are much braver than i could ever be, and blunter too. i wish i could be them and also see all my faults in them. its a lot.

orym was my first introduction to liam o'brien and his devastating little guys (more on caleb later), and just his backstory and the way he deals with people intrigues me so much and i want to see him happy so bad.

laudna oh laudna. marisha ray you have ruined me. even going into this with my minimal knowledge of the briarwoods, her backstory reveal was so intense and it hurt. also, creepy unnerving girlies stick together! she's iconic.

chetney is so wild to me i love him so much. he is so intensely gender as well i love him so much. i love gruff and grumpy characters that are actually nice once you are more friendly with them.

imogen. i will say it took a little bit for her to grow on me but i do love her. i think the bassuras dusk stuff really helped me like her more. also her immense power and lightning scars are pretty cool if you ask me.

fearne. i love how sweet she is and the stuff like being bad at lying and also just stealing little things here and there was really fun. but what made me like her more was when she got more serious and i didn't expect that (foreshadowing for later!)

fcg. now, i still have, mixed? feelings for fcg. in a sense of i dont hate the character but i think the character arc is not something im too interested in, but i do still like them. the stuff with frida was very nice, and i do like the bits that they do - but i think there still feels like there is something missing for me somewhat.

now, with the mighty nein, i had an inkling on who i would like. i thought caleb certainly because we seem very similar, molly maybe because i liked ashton so hey i might like this taliesin character too! and that was it really. going into it though, because i had seen so much of jester (talking about her and cosplays mostly) i thought that she would be probably my least favourite because her personality didn't seem to really gel with what i usually like in characters. but here i am, on the other side with my favs being caleb, fjord, and jester! it was so much watching everything for the first time, even with knowing the big spoilers and then looking at more minor spoilers so i knew somewhat what would happen - but i do that with a lot of things, its different knowing what happens versus actually watching and experiencing what is happening.

caleb. caleb widogast is such an intense character and i loved every minute i spent with him. i spent so much time checking when i would finally see the nein sided tower of his and watching liam describe everything for an hour was so incredible i was in awe. i truely love that dirt wizard so much.

fjord was a truly unexpected character for me to fall for. the first time i realized that i was going to love him though was when they were in the one politicians house early in the campaign and he held his sword to caleb to make sure he wasn't fucking with them. then seeing his growth, the accent change, and just his whole deal i was enraptured. i do miss the southern eldritch blast though.

jester oh my goodness did she creep up on me. i think her initial cuteness that i had experienced throughout just existing on the internet put me off for some reason but i don't know why. however i did quickly fall in love with her, when she had one of her more sinister/serious moments early on. i don't remember what it was but i remember thinking oh. /oh./ okay. i love her. and then her relationship with her mama, and artie, gosh i just loved watching laura bailey do literally anything. the cupcake bit! also the sprinkle bit is quite funny. i also just love doing her voice when im talking to myself. she is also the reason that i take a decent amount of damage spells with my current cleric.

beau. i think i thought that i would have liked her more than i did (don't get me wrong i liked her a lot but she is not in my top three), but she is incredible. as a fellow monk pc i do love going the extra mile with those stunning strikes, and also seeing her relationship with yasha blossom was so lovely. and her bro relationships with fjord and caleb were also some of my favourites.

yasha. after starting with campaign three, it was really hard to not see ashley all the time and i remember having to look on the wiki while watching to check when she would come back every time she left. i think i really started to like her more after her she got taken, and went through that big arc, and we were around her more often. i loved watching her dreams. i loved watching her so much.

veth was so unexpected are you kidding me?? i will say i have yet to have a sam character be in my top three but god he knows how to throw an emotional punch and i love that kind of stuff. i love her relationship with caleb, the detective agency, the chaos crew. i love her arc of getting herself back, of seeing her family again. ough. im a big lover of families.

caduceus. goodness gracious me what a character. i just absolutely loved the aesthetic and caduceus's whole relationship to how he approaches death. he is also the reason i started playing a grave cleric in a newer campaign. but truly, has made me think differently about death - which was especially needed for me this year.

mollymauk. i knew he was dead. i knew he would die. but that didn't make me any less upset when it happened! i think about him often, what could have been. especially since i was so sure he took the wrong amount of damage in that fight and should not have quite have been knocked out at that time. but his whole maximallist aesthetic is something i very much enjoy, and i love the through line of his cards with jester.

wow okay this has gotten to be very long but i need to get my thoughts about everyone out somewhere!! if you've read this far im so sorry this is so much of my own ramblings.

[justallihere]

i'm going insane bc i was away for the weekend and left my phone alone (god bless) and came back to a whole chapter PLUS love declaration PLUS forehead kiss ?? omg.....

Mira is not letting Xaden rest like ever, I do wonder what Violet told her while Xaden was prepping her bath tho.

“Not if it bothers you, they can’t,” said Xaden. “I’ll make sure they keep it away from you.” 

oh he wants violet to be comfortable so baaaad he's the embodiment of "is the sun bothering you queen" and im so here for it.

i'm totally fine and sane over xaden washing violet's hair im not kicking my feet or anything and im definetely not crying over how soft they are and how much trust must violet have on him bc she's letting him touch her hair after it being threatned to be cut.

forehead touches are my faaaav so u can imagine how well fed i am after this chapter and for that i say thank you alli *dramatically bows*

Xaden not wanting her to feel like she wasnt love so he just declares himself to her had me weak, like it could've been this grand gesture but nothing between them has ever been planned or expected so he just winged it and it was perfectly what she needed. talk about soulmates !!

when u told us the declaration was gonna hurt i didnt have this imagined in my mind but im so glad it happened this way and not the way i thought it was gonna happen. it was so bittersweet !!

ALSO she def knows she loves him shes just not ready to admit it bc in no way in hell would she ask him to say after he declared himself if she didnt know she also felt something

also the way they first slept i know xaden neck was complaining

also violet reminded me of a cat who always try to get closer in their sleep. she just wants to cuddle !! and shes so real for that

Rhiannon is truly a bestie!! not her terrorrizing the love interest we love a ride or die bestie, even if sometimes she's unresonable

“You whisked her away before anyone could check on her.” 

bestie there was not one single part of her that wasnt broken what was the man supposed to do *cries* but i do understand her stress

SLOANE MAIRI !!! not her calling the king of tyrrendor her brother i love that for her !! she's a princess so true. also i looove xaden and liam's talk it wasnt too cheesy bc tbh they dont operate like that but it was so genuine !!

can the guards chill !!

Garrick is just like me!! i too love gossip and will put my hands on it as soon as i can. but garrick its been like 12 hours wait a little longer or violet herself will call u out again. but also not garrick begging xaden no rule to country and he's just like "no <3" love that for him his wife just got back running a country is very far from his mind.

“Is that what you told her to do?” Rhiannon raised an eyebrow. “Get over it?” “No, but you’re not her, are you?”

He's so ??!!

the development of violet a few chapters ago being like "he didnt hold me while we slept bc there had been no excuses for it in Aretia" to now being like "im gonna curl into your arms so hard you'll never escape" and honestly good for them !!

anywayyyy i LOVED this chapter

lol a lot happened this weekend, welcome back!!!

Xaden’s literal one and only concern is Violet and her comfort, fuck everything else. I’m totally not fine and sane about the hair washing so I guess we balance each other out 🫶🏻

They are very much soulmates!! Xaden didn’t plan to fall in love with her, of course he didn’t plan some grand declaration of it either, we’re just going with what feels right. Violet is a grumpy little kitten yes you’re right

Rhiannon is stressed as hell, like give her best friend back RIORSON where is she

Garrick needs both gossip and for Xaden to do his job and he’s getting neither of those things! Too bad so sad!

Thank you!!!! 🩷

[astranva]

TPWK (Behind the Scenes)

Word Count: 1.5k

Category: Fluff

Warning: liam’s strip that down choreography slander and a few swear words

Summary: The one where you post the behind the scenes of the TPWK video that you filmed, showing Harry as an annoyingly adorable boyfriend.

miss @finelinevogue​ sent me “NOV IM THINKING YOU WOULD ABSOLUTELY PERFECTLY EXECUTE A BEHIND THE SCENES BLURB WITH THIS NEW CONTENT” and you know i can’t say no to el, like ever so here i am 🥳

..

“Do you think I can dance?” Harry had asked you one night as you watched Stranger Things.

You had hummed, tearing your eyes from the television to look at him on your lap, seeing his eyes set on you, “What was that?”

“Do you think I can dance?” He repeated.

You smiled before chuckling a little, “You got a move or two,” you teased him, “Why?”

With an excited smile on his face, he had answered: “I’m thinking about Treat People having a dance.”

“Like a choreography?”

“Yeah.”

Your eyebrows had went up, tilting your head as you looked at him, “I like where this is going,” you said, “But baby, it has–look, I don’t think I’ll be able to look at you if by choreography you mean something like–like Liam’s Strip That Down thing, please,” you cringed, “I won’t be able to look at you, I’m sorry.”

Harry burst out laughing, poking you in the stomach, “Fuck ooooff!” He dragged, “Be nice, Y/N!”

“I am being nice!” You laughed, “And you know I’m right! I don’t mean anything against him personally, it’s just–it’s just bad choreography, alright?”

But you had trust in Harry–enough to know that he wasn’t going to go for a choreography that would make him look all “cool” and “hot”.

You felt like a proud mom every time you watched Harry practice, sometimes feeling like a mean girlfriend every time you laughed at him if he fell or stepped on anybody’s toes.

“Stop laughing at me!” He had tackled you in his arms one day, laughing with you and everyone else did, “You’re not allowed in the studio anymore. You’re not allowed.”

“Studio?” You had teased him, “Look at you, talking like a professional dance–Ow, H, stop, I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” You had pushed him, trying to stop him from tickling you.

And that was when you decided to start filming the behind the scenes of the Treat People With Kindness music video.

Initially, it was just going to be a keepsake for you and Harry to look back and laugh at, with no intentions to post it anywhere, but then the 2nd of July came and with it, the video you had created was posted.

It started with the makeup artist of the music video trying to fix Phoebe Waller-Bridge’s makeup with a brush, and Harry annoyingly pushing her hand away as he looked at you with a childish smile.

“Harry, stop being a pest!” You could be heard saying through a giggle before he huffed at you and turned away.

The video then officially began, the song beginning to play the moment Harry was seen standing in the dancing studio where he practiced, Cosmigos red t-shirt tucked inside his black joggers with his hair clipped back. His hands were on his hips, trying to stifle his laughter as he stood in the front and middle, backup dancers behind him.

The scene then changed to show Harry standing from the side in a white t-shirt and colorful Elvis-printed pajama bottoms, his white dress shoes that he was set to wear for the music video on his feet. In a ready posture, his arms reached out to hold Phoebe Waller-Bridge as she ran towards him so he could carry her, but they both ended up laughing.

“And he says he does cardio,” you joked in the video as you recorded, letting out a laugh when Harry ran towards you, jumping with his hands on your shoulder.

In a split screen was then two videos of Harry with a mic stand, doing the official dance in the studio along with the music, before it split to 3 screens to show the actual music video at the top.

The video then showed a single scene of Harry from the TPWK’s location, doing his dance from the side as you recorded on an 8mm film camera that you had borrowed from a friend.

It then moved to show another video you recorded with your phone, Harry in a white t-shirt and black shorts before you propped your phone and stepped beside him with a grin, Harry putting his hand out for you to hold as that one move from the dance, and you put yours in his, the both of you laughing as you moved to stop recording.

It then showed 4 photos of Harry dancing from the music video before it moved to show the camera filming him as he danced. 

At the 49th second, you were seen through the large mirrors of the dancing studio as you recorded Harry running in a circle with the backup singers dancing, before he ran towards you, pressing a kiss to your phone before his face scrunched as he ran away, hand reaching to hold his groin, “My groin,” he complained before laughing.

A minute and 14 seconds in, it was just you and Harry in another studio, you recording him as he practiced his movies in a white t-shirt and white shorts, his Vans on his feet. 

He stepped closer to your phone as you recorded him from the floor, opening his arms as he looked down at you before giving you a grin.

It then moved to show another clip from that same day, you on Harry’s shoulders as you recorded through the mirror, his arms out before he placed his hands on your legs, carefully swaying the both of you as you both laughed.

At 1:18, and unbeknownst to the fans watching, it was the day when you surprised him on set. Harry was standing with Jeff, in his black TPWK hoodie, you recording as he looked around nonchalantly before his eyes landed on you, his face lighting up and his eyes going wide before he pointed at you, “You,” he mouthed as he raised his arm to excitedly wave at you and send you an air kiss as he chewed on his gum, before the video showed him eagerly walking towards you, his arms out before he was out of the view, but clearly because he was hugging you. 

In black and white, the video showed a shot of Harry, shaking his left leg with his lips tucked before he moved to the side with his body a little, shaking his other leg.

“You’re such a pro at this, H,” your voice could be heard saying, “Give us the moves, give us the moves!”

The video then moved, showing Harry in his TPWK sparkly outfit, you giggling as he got close to your phone, “Get out of my face, alright?” He said with wide eyes, dramatically so, before turning around to walk, looking over his shoulder at you with a sheepish smile before he walked back towards you, “I’m just kidding, come heeeeere,” he puckered his lips.

The video then showed Harry in black and white filter again, standing in the studio with the backup dancers as he smiled, “This is the first time H is performing the dance,” you said, “Look how smug he looks,” you zoomed on his face, showing him give you a face before sticking his tongue out and laughing.

At 1 minute and 50 seconds, he stood in your shared home in the living room, his full TPWK on as he showed it off to you by giving you a full twirl.

“You look so good,” you said, “Give us another twirl, H, come on.”

With a childishly excited grin, Harry twirled again before ending the twirl with his hands out and an open mouthed grin.

The video then showed more behind the scenes of Phoebe practicing, and her and Harry practicing together as well as photos of them you had taken before minute 2 and 9 seconds came and it was you and Harry dancing together.

Standing in front of one another, your hands were out, going side to side as that one move from his and Phoebe’s dance, wide grins on your faces before you held on to his hand, wanting to do the cartwheel but Harry being Harry, he pulled your entire body to his chest instead, making you lose balance against him before you threw your head back as you laughed, Harry joining as he wrapped his arms around your body against his before pressing his lips to your cheek while Jeff laughed at the both of you in the background.

The video then continued to show more behind the scenes of the music video before it ended with you propping your phone before stepping back, showing all the cheering backup dancers and Phoebe as it was the last day of filming the video, before Harry appeared, wrapping his arm around your waist before you wrapped yours around his shoulders, the both of you raising your other arms up as you cheered with the rest.

If there was anything you understood, it was how exciting it always was to give Harry’s fans content like that out of the blue, so you knew that it was something they would eat up when you posted it on your Instagram with: 

“@harryflorals you’re welcome xx” 

[upsidedowngrass]

hi these are some thoughts i had about liam a min ago. theyre messy but im thinking abt them so much . blwos up (text version under the cut, tho i also put the text into the alt)

its. initially he doesnt seem OPPOSED to help or anything but he def develops just. not considering himself. he doesnt care what happens to him as long as he can do what he needs to .but i think at the most visceral he still will avoid things that Actively Will Be Painful, tho i think hes more aware of that in heavy hindsight, or when its extremely imminent (gestures at ep 14)

DEFINITIELY… I THINK TO THE SHIT W THE SMOKESTACK SM hes like. is it dangerous? yeah. could i get in legal trouble? yeah. but its what stone wants, im sure of it. and i need to do that. no matter what

bc he obv is scared of death!!! he actively AVOIDS it in ep 14. which ofc is a low bar but its like. it shows his priorities SO well

that saving the others+stopping the others+just. doing whatever stone is asking him, thats giving him … some semblance of a purpose w what he feels like is already a permenantly destroyed life that cant be pieced together, that he has nothing else, thats weighed heavier than his own safety

he DOES object to offing himself in ep 13 though. at least he says as much, but he. doesnt seem to convinced. i think it was on his list of idedas but hes scared of death so idt he wanted to outright do THAT unless hed exhausted his options entirely, and following the notes WAS his 'options'

he cant follow the notes if hes dead, and as far as he knows, dying might screw up his ability to follow them. so its not smth he WANTS and hes scared of it and will avoid it if he can, but his own safety is considered a lower priorty; the same way he didnt wanna kill airy, he didnt wanna kill himself- stopping one from continuing, follow the notes were a higher priority, but if doing that directly requires doing the first two things he doesnt wanna actually do, he would do it. which , the thing w the smokestack isnt suicide, but the lack of concern for his own safety feels cut from the same cloth, really

THE FACT THAT HE CONSIDERS IT IS SO. hes so obv at his last straw its so upsetting. i think he realizes its illogical and thats what properly deters him. if its the wrong call, after all, it could ruin his chances- he needs to make use of his life as much as he can, he doesnt actually know what comes after bc he wasnt there long enough, but he knows its terrifying- but if it had been what he needed to do he would. but it doesnt seem to be

the argument is so very much. bryce fully coming to the realization that liam isnt just unhappy. that this isnt just smth hes just adamant abt, or a surface level problem and solution- he said 'you really are a mess' abt the eggs and i think at that pt all he knows is that liams Obsessed w this, and he knows shit got worse, but that liam is dwelling on it (smth bryce, master of handling his emotions, does not do /silly) - that hes doing this for himself and is just being ridiculous. but the argument i think is when it clicks how deep seated it is. i think after liams final little outburst after bryce says liams doing it for himself, i think the calling of bryce by soda bottle, the phrasing all makes it click that hes not just a guy not handling problems well, and isnt just being stupid, that liam is actively at the end of his rope and has stopped keeping himself safe and couldnt give less of a shit abt it- and its only then that it properly clicks for bryce. which ofc bryce couldnt know this is more an observation of what that convo does, bc what it does is like. make it click for bryce just how deep seated this problem is. he cant say 'dont do that' and walk away, and i think that probably scares bryce, because hes often the one fucking himself over- and this time, its someone else doing that, and its terrifying

he ultimately follows liam out of compassion- he doesnt need the keys. the car is totalled, and im fairly certain itd cost more to repair that thing than to get another car. he doesnt need liam for that. but i dont know if, before liam says his final thing, bryce wouldve fully followed him up the smokestack. bc theres a pause in bryce following liam at the gate, and i think thats the stretch that was because of what liam last said. bc he still cares about liam of course. hes pissed and catches up w him the first time because hes fucking angry and reasonably so, bc this guy STOLE AND CRASHED HIS CAR . and is mad abt it, and wants liam to know that. and he follows him to the gate bc hes WORRIED bc liam is being stupid, but that last stretch is like. thats him deciding that. liam isnt being stupid, hes not thinking and doesnt care and that its not smth liam COULD even do intentionally, bc its not smth that occurs as smth illogical and dangerous (and that being bad) if youre out of it and fucked up and dont know how to handle it. and bryce has his own issues, and hes not an asshole, and following liam up there is just. its him acting bc he knows liams too out of it to not get himself killed, and not only does he not want that on his conscience, he knows liam doesnt deserve to have that happen to him due to being so fucked up by things that he CANNOT think straight. hes not responding well and no matter how much someone could say he should try, like bryce was wanting him to, liam isnt at that pt. there are stages, so to speak, of experiencing trauma, and theres a point where its hard to even conceptualize that you SHOULD respond better to it, even if told, because it makes everything turn on its head and its hard to follow that, no matter how logical of a person you are. and bryce knows this. that liams not not trying to heal, that hes not in a place he CAN

if that makes. any sense. i have a lot of feelings on it

[louisisalarrie]

I have another one "where do you want to sit" "next to you" (just stab me with an angel blade it would hurt less) --- Harry got Louis a Christmas present and it even has a little bow on it --- Louis' birthday party --- I think we kinda share that really --- any domestic larry

anon “where do you want to sit” “next to you” makes me cry every time they were just KIDS it hurts so much

and then them very obviously being told they can’t. god. vid here

HE WRAPPED IT HIMSELF AND IT HAS A BOW ON IT LOOK AT THID PROUD BABY

I assuuuuume you mean his 21st here hehehe so fucking cute look at that damn CAKE

THIS is also one of my absolute faves and like !!!!!!!! Zayn losing his shit so much he has to put his helmet on and Louis making fun of Liam the whole time it’s just too good. Also in this iconic interview:

- harry messing up his V day narrative 1:20

- the ongoing Liam’s kidney saga 1:55

- “special relationship” and the above quote 5:40

- “I’ve got the fastest time, 2 minutes, dead” “not an endurance man!” cackles 6:35

And everything about this interview, really, is just incredible. Niall cackles at everything louis says, Liam tries to be so serious and do the right thing, Louis is being an absolute RASCAL, Harry is being sooky and then forgetting the narrative, and zayn just losing it quietly in the corner.

Idk who’s idea it was to give 5 teenage boys (particularly Louis) redbull but my GOD it gave us some great content

Okay now listen…. I could do a whole masterpost on larry being domestic. It’s extremely hard to just pick a few faves, but damn…

FEATURING:

1. Harry dishing on how bad of a housemate Louis is but that he still wouldn’t live with anyone else im sobbing

2. Harry being up before louis every morning and making him a cup of tea I mean cOME OFF IT

3. Harry doing all the cooking in their house and FOR LOUIS

4. Harry bringing louis’ glasses over to him which may not seem like a big thing but it’s just so fucking cute and one of those little moments that we got to peek at but never see

anyway thanks anon I’ve now been crying for 2 hours

[ykthefancyclamwiththepearlinside]

still need to check the other one u answered me but again, ur stories are really fun, so im going to ask for two, if u don't mind... 🫣 whoopsies ouch and thiam theater au

ofc i don't mind! thank you so much for the ask bestie!!

whoopsies ouch

@adhdavinci @skarabrae-stone @post-and-out @auburnlaughter @ksbbb tagging yall here, thank yall for the asks as well!

Straightening up, he pulls on all of the years of lessons and training on how to be a proper gentleman. “I’m sorry, Captain Raeken. I didn’t mean to offend you.” Liam says coolly. “If you would like, we can discuss my release.”

“Call me Theo.” His look is dark, and Liam swallows hard, taking another step back. He’d rather throw himself off of a cliff than give in to this man. 

“I apologize if I offended you, Captain Raeken.” Liam spits out, grinning when Theo’s eye twitches. 

The pirate sighs, mouth twisting up into a sadistic smirk. “Have it your way, darling. If you don’t want to stay here with me, I can throw you out there with the crew. And they haven’t had any type of company in a long, long time.”

thiam theatre au

@aparticularbandit tagging you here, thank you for the ask as well!

“Hi.”

Oh fuck oh shit what the fuck?

“Uh,” Liam says dumbly, making him laugh. His laugh is so cute.

“All I get is ‘Uh’?” Wall boy asks, and Liam scowls at him.

 “No, I just…ran out of things to say.” 

Real smooth Dunbar, real smooth.

hope yall enjoy!

[saccharinemeat]

What are your opinions on Hfjone ships?

oh fucking man

okay imma get crucified , but here we go. opinion on popular ones + my own rareship

Liam/Bryce

fucking SUCKS. it can only work if you're self aware about how absolutely awful and hurtful liam is,and i feel from what ive seen that the fandom just reduces them to 'omg doomed yaoi' and like, woobifies them. This ship only and only works as one sided,forced and extremely toxic (in my eyes). Bryce deserves better than Liam, and liam relentlessly hurts Bryce down to the very goddamn end (← i say this as someone who is currently fuckin obsessed with liam and self recognizes in him 😐)

Liam/Amelia

I like this one. I feel like theyre pretty good for each other, although, it's sort of a doomed one,in the sense of how it would work only if they were to be in the plane forever. I do feel like Amelia sort of lost herself in the plane forever. If those two ever got out, he'd have to take some charge on their shared recovery and Liam is NOT gonna deal with that well. Still a cute ship,and I like it.

Amelia/Charlotte

...why? this feels like pairing the leftover main characters because everyone is focused on the Boys TM. they dont really have any chemistry,like,even theorically i feel like they wouldn't mesh well,unless you wanna make Amelia basically Charlotte's therapist. But yay, women! i can't be mad about this one,really. I don't mind it

Liam/Airy

Lairy is...complicated, emotionally. I can see it actually being a thing,but it's really in a fucked up way. definitely a 'i hope we both die' kind of pairing. I think about it and it gives me heartache that i cant explain. it hurts because they both are awful in different ways but also they are trying. I will say i do enjoy it but in a way that makes me hurt. lots of angst there. I think this one especially benefits from becoming a ship that happens after moldpack being A thing

Liam/Charlotte

Okay this one is not popular,in fact i feel like nobody but me is into it but theres so much potential here. especially the way they would be so horribly,terrifyingly bad to each other. I can imagine Charlotte getting out instead of Bryce,and how different it all would be. her prideful nature and liam's manipulative tendencies are so deliciously wrong. I feel they would bring the worst out of each other. I have a lot to say about them but like. Consider those first 5 months. Liam was as isolated as Charlotte was,he only sorta rejoined the others in the last two months stretch, and I think they might've interacted during that. And just, Charlotte WOULD be interested in solving the mystery,she would jump on that chance because she needs control and Liam would be elated at first and horrified later and AGH it would be so messy and interesting. please ask me more about moldpack. im the charlotte/liam person number 1 fan now.

and now rapid fire other ships,

Oscar/Bryce - can see it,and i feel like it makes sense within Bryce's trauma streak. I can imagine them bonding and it getting a bit too close

Bryce/Stella - I wish this had more exploration,object shipcest is so insanely rare. I like it

Taylor/Amelia - kinda cute,can see it if taylor stayed in the plane. Especially if it starts as a sort of one sided crush that goes too far

Liam/Owen - this is cute,can kinda see it but only in a no-show scenario (as in, ONE never happened and this is a coworker romance thing)

Charlotte/Parker - it upsets me,but i can see them as having hooked up once and Parker catching feelings while Charlotte is super uncomfortable about it and that explains that weird tension.

Bryce/Amelia - eh. sure? it's cute but i dont care for it a lot. also i dont care for sodacentpack a lot,but it's better than sodapack alone i Guess. get ♣️'d lmao

ALSO, the crackship/crossover with showvember

Airy/Popcorn - NO. piss off the joke is boring and lame and IDK i hate it.

[jellyaibo]

awesum splendid dream!!! (im lying)

so in this dream cheesy decided to randomly release a post finale thing for hfjone, that seemingly had the main 3 (bryce, amelia, and liam) and even airy having a good ending. it starts off with liam, amelia, and bryce going to some bridge above a river, there was also a tunnel on the bridge too (this is important remember this), and they were chatting about a fourth person coming to take a photo with them, which then reveals that airy was going to join them.

liam turns around and sees airy waiting to cross a road, liam and bryce decide to help him cross since to them it looks like he had no fucking clue where he actually was, so they waited for the cars to stop and helped airy cross, both of them held his hands like he was a fucking child and they kept joking and talking about how he can barely function, with airy not really even paying attention to what the two are saying. then, as the two approach amelia who was still standing at the bridge, bryce decides that just carriying airy would work much better, so he cradles him basically like a child. help!

anyways everyone gets ready to take the picture and once its taken they realize that airy wasnt looking at the camera so they make fun of him and decide to take another picture, while they are getting set up again airy somehow gets his hands on a match and somehow nobody fucking notices him lighting it and putting it out for funsies because they are too busy making fun of him because he called the camera a "flash box thing." so the smoke from the match starts wafting into the tunnel, and makes contact with a faulty lightbulb that was hanging inside of the tunnel, which caused the match to ignite again suddenly, and set bryce on fire since he was still holding airy.

obviously this made him drop airy and he was desperately trying to pat the flames off him, liam and amelia were also rushing to put out the flames and while this was happening bryce was just fucking screaming his lungs out, then i think amelia manages to get a bucket of water from the river below and puts out the flames but i think it was way too late cuz the flames fucking melted bryces face off (and i mean this literally, when she threw the water onto him his face fucking came off, it wasnt gruesome at all because there wasnt really any gore except for his eyes since they seemed to be gone after this??? idk its weird to describe) oh and he also slipped on the water and fell into the river, which now seemed to be RUSHING with so much water compared to how calm it was in the beginning, so bryce got quickly swept away, you could still hear him screaming for a minute but then he went quiet and got swept away. liam dived into the river after him but then he was just- never seen again after this, i think he immediately fucking died, or maybe something else happened but i cant remember for the life of me. anyways amelia is scrambling to find a way to save the two, she tries calling for help and looking around for airy but he also seems to be gone, but then the camera cuts to under the river where airy plunged into the water himself for . some reason and is thinking really hard about things, but then he remembers that he needs to breathe so he frantically swims up to the surface and nobody is there anymore, just him and the tunnel bridge. theres some music playing here i think, and we just have a shot of airy getting out of the river and walking onto shore (the river is completely calm again btw) and then it just fucking ends there??????? theres . a lot of credits and even a little fucking "thanks for watching" from cheesy, and i tried skipping to the end of it which revealed a fucking after credits scene where amelia is in a PSYCH WARD . but for some reason there was some creepypasta shit going on here cuz when i tried to go back to the psych ward part it just didnt exist anymore, and instead was replaced by a very….interesting montage.

so it showed two furry wolf characters, one of them wore a green hoodie and the other wore a red suit, the green hoodie wolf was trying to mug the suit wolf. then it cut to two children in kindergarden, one (obviously) had a green backpack and the other had a red lunchbox, then the red lunchbox kid tried to either play with or…bully the green backpack kid, i cant remember but- basically this was cheesy saying "oh yeah bro the lore is deep" and these two have been destined to meet in every "past life." and they were also destined to die together in some way, i think it then showed how the wolves and children die which was upsetting and this went on for a bit longer with other "sodapack colored" characters until the video just suddenly ended. and uh yeah, it was 5 am when i started writing this and uhmmm i cant go back to sleep cuz of it

oh and also heres my recreation of their last photo

(ofc it was much more close up but i wanted to show how the bridge looked too, also its messy cuz its. fucking 6 am now helpme)

[pinazee]

The Old and the Restless

The first episode to include another Spencer! Now, granted we don’t get much here other than henry doesn’t seem to get along with his dad and maybe doesn’t like the idea of his son being around him. Plus, I don’t think he’s ever mentioned again. I was hoping the introduction to grandpa spencer would give us some kind of reason for why henry is so controlling. We could possibly infer, strictly based on his personality, that grandpa spencer wasnt the most responsible and that henry, as elder brother, took on the brunt of taking care of the family. I mean, you could possibly even go as far as to say grandpa spencer had some run in’s with the law and thats how henry got interested in it- out of spite of his own father and thus leading to the idea that spencer sons resenting their fathers is like a family curse (i think thats actually a thing? I have a vague memory of someone saying it at least). But again, this is all speculation because we never see him again. Grandpas also act differently with their grandkids than their own kids too so who’s to say what it was like for henry growing up. Either way, this flashback really emphasizes how strict henry was, and the more flashbacks i see, the more saddened i get by how downtrodden little shawn is every time he shows up. Liam visibly shrinks when he sits next to him, its heartbreaking. But im glad his grandpa stuck up for him (which is probably why he never saw him again).

The way they pop up here makes me snicker

I love the fast one they played on henry! Shawn knew there was no way he would help unless he thought he could use it as an opportunity to show him up (because his dads a grade A asshole).

I also have no respect for men who call other men girls as an insult, especially when one of those men is his own fucking son. So you gotta imagine shawns heard that kind of bullshit his whole life, so i kind of give him a pass when he makes fun of gus for not being manly enough, though thankfully that seems to dissipate in later seasons so we can call it character growth (though i think it was just the writers, or maybe james, who decided it wasn’t very funny and just hurt the character). Henry has a lot of ground to cover before he can get redeemed in my book. He’s just the worst. im having a much harder time with henry during this rewatch.

Gus is being absolutely adorable here. This episode really made it seem like Gus was henrys kid too, not only because he’s completely comfortable sleeping on his shoulder (I’ve never felt that close to my friends parents at least) but also because he’s giving shit to henry as much as shawn is and i love it! It makes sense too considering how often gus was at his house, henry practically raised him as well.

This is a semi good shawn vs. henry episode. I wish they would have highlighted better how shawn and henry gather their information in different ways but it was more like Henry got some pieces and shawn got pieces but neither had the complete picture so they ended up just working together instead of against. I think i’d have preferred if henry was seeing all the same stuff but shawn actually came to the right conclusion, or that shawn showed kindness to the right person and got the key piece of info that way because ultimately its how he connects with people that separates him from henry (simply because henry is pretty good at seeing the same stuff shawn does a lot of the times is all).

“Just this time im going to teach you a lesson” just this time??? Thats literally all you do henry! Thats like your whole thing!

The way Henry says this makes it seem like he was struggling to call Gus his life partner haha

Shawn and gus both knew of african gambian pouch rats, so i can only assume they watched a nature documentary together haha Sidenote: i randomly looked up african gambian pouch rat to see what they looked like and they’re being used to sniff out tuberculosis apparently?!? Crazy stuff man.

Lassie just wanted to straight up incarcerate a child. Thank god karen became chief over him- could you imagine??? Shawn would definitely have been locked up in the pilot. Gus wouldve been killed next to mira or something, juliet would still be in miami. Buzz wouldve been fired or killed by that serial killer. So many crimes would’ve been unsolved and so many people would’ve been locked up and innocent. So again, thank god for chief vick.

The indian blood bit gets a pass simply because of the line “they were here first” and gus’ response “im not hating on indians im hating on you” I dont think its terribly offensive but it is a dumb stereotypical joke. It just kind of makes me sigh and shake my head.

Why is gus always trying to get shawn to taste blood?? Does that show up later? Is this a consistent thing? Its just kind of weird considering gus is really squeamish around it? I think its Gus’ way of trying to prank him but he’s like really bad at it haha Also i didn’t like gus’ face there. It made it seem vaguely… nevermind. Its just weird lol

I dont like the B story with juliet and lassie. I think i did at one point because juliet put the fear of god in him and inadvertently that same fear in the others which was fun, but this kids a fucking creep so i don’t think theres any combination of words that would cause this character to suddenly become respectful and it might be the most unrealistic thing to happen on psych, which is truly saying something. Its just one of those scenes you can’t overanalyze so I won’t! Its fun! (But like, thats what im doing here so jk). I did enjoy the “scared straight” subversion moment. Prisons great kids. Its like summer camp. Also his friends name is “white slavery” and idk what to do with that information except point at it with my mouth open in amusement.

I just like how lassie does his “strike two” and im doing that from now on.

Overall its not one of my fave episodes but heres some gifs of some of my fave moments

[ilovejaskierthebard]

I bowed out of the Netflix!Witcher fandom in the middle of S2 so like, I have zero regrets considering the future of the show now.

-but let me just say theres a way they could get me to watch again.

In which Netflix accepts their utter fuck up and just leans into the fandom. Like make it 100% Jaskier. Have him bard it up, have Joey write and preform for half the episode. Then fuck his way across the world in the other. Maybe just fun side adventures of him doing wacky things. Maybe some monster fucking.

And then every now and then, in the background you see Geralt fighting a monster. Maybe so far/fuzzy you cant see his face. Alternatively I would accept Liam!Geralt is just what Geralt looks like from Jaskier's perspective. Perhaps he needs glasses? Idk Im just spit balling my dream season at this point.