#lifesuck

[dumbsneky]

*burning through life pretending to be a snek so I dont have to human* *the fact i need money coming to hit me with a reality check*

[psychika-siada-czlowiekowi]

Czemu życie chce mnie tak dobić ? Co ja mu takiego zrobiłam, że na każdym kroku musi mi rozpierdolić wszystko co dobre?

[griefladenribs]

shawty hurt me so bad i came back on tumblr (sad poetry and prose maxxing) ((only art can give me the tenderness i need rn)) (((pain is the only home i have that won't kick me out)))

[elgringomkposta]

Here is the panel 1 colored, im really happy. Took longer than expected but it defenetely worth it, or atleast for me. Hope it met your expectatios. I will be leaving the story and dialogues down in the description. I won´t put speepch bubbles because they will ruin the panel.

This story was writen with the help of a Deviant, thank you so much for your participation!

A Soul soucking Guest... Panel 1:

20:18... Cold night in Berlint. Fuuka winced as she entered the town of Berlint, her body injured from her fight against Naruto Uzumaki. She wanted his chakra and body so much, and even with her various skills, she failed. “That damn brat! Damaging my body and making a fool out of me…now I have to find a way to regain my strength…” Fuuka walked around aimlessly in the streets, trying to find a worthy body to drain and steal, yet she only saw people with low chakra and weak bodies... 21:02 She was nearly dead so she drained a poor woman who was just enjoying the calm of Berlints beach and stole her clothes... It wasn´t enought... Right as she was about to give up, she sensed something extraordinary, a huge load of chakra, emanating nearby. Fuuka smiled and walked towards the source, licking her lips in excitement.

1.She knocked on a door, patiently waiting until a beautiful woman opened it, confused as to who the mysterious guest was. “Oh hello? And who might you be?” Yor Forger looked at the woman, taking in her gorgeous face, sexy body, and Long luscious hair. The seductive vixen introduced herself with a voice that could make any man swoon for her.

2.“My name is Fuuka dear, and I wanted to visit you on behalf of a request…” A request that even an assassin like Yor would not expect.

3.“Oh! A request? Did my employer send you then? Please, tell me more!” Yor, oblivious to what the older woman was planning, asked her for what was hopefully her next job. “Oh no dear, I didn’t come from your employer, I’m here for a more personal request… I traveled a long way... Im hungry. I want your unawaken Chakra... I want that beautiful soul that you are proudly carring with you... Oh i would rip it out right now if i could... So beatiful...Also i would love to add your body to my collection"

4. Yor looked at Fuuka with a confused face... " Ch..Chakra? My soul?" Yor´s vision started to ignore every other input of her enviroment... She could only focus on Fuuka´s eyes...    Fuuka eyes lit up red, causing Yor’s to freeze in place, her legs feeling like stone. “I-I can’t move…” Yor struggled, unable to look away from Fuuka. “Perfect, now let’s see what you’re hiding under that wonderful body of      yours…” Peering through Yor’s body, Fuuka could now see her Chakra pathways, large and filled to the brim with energy, resembling her circulatory sistem... glowing along with yor´s heartbeat. “Oh my…so much chakra inside you and you have never used it... is all mine, and your body is absolutely perfect as well…”

5.Fuuka walked up to Yor, licking her cheek to get a small taste of the assassin "Oh... How lucky... Wind nature, i will really enjoy this". Yor began to blush, confused as to why this was happening. “W-what are you doing!” Fuuka shushed her with a single finger, putting it to Yor’s lips. “Don’t worry my dear, you’ll enjoy what’s going to happen next…”

A soul Stealing Guest... Panel 1

[salembehindbars]

I MUST have been evil in a past life because I am definitely suffering a punishment in this one.

[edy-l]

[iamreallyawkwardsblog]

Ye insecurities khatam kyun nahi hoti bhai!!

Do pal ki chain nahi hai naseeb mai.

[watchtheendthroughdyingeyes]

Fake it till you make it..

[fumiku]

MakiAngel fic prompts

Dropping my makiangel fic prompts/wips because I bet I won’t get to write out 99% of these, but the ship has so little and they’re dear to me so I still want to share them, for what they’re worth. Mostly, they’re bite-sized atmospheric prose to make you ponder touch starved lonely depressed monster who plays at being lazy uncaring and devilish x heartless lonely singleminded manipulator monster who happens to be one of the few able to touch him and modified his memories. Girl who everyone is in love with that has everyone wrapped around her finger x guy who isn’t but also isn’t not who’s somehow never thought of resisting or leaving or distrusting her... These two grabbed me by the throat and still haven’t let go for whenever I’m in that melancholic mood fr. This isn’t my ship manifesto, I’m just sighing looking out my window wistfully

Every separate prompt is in its own paragraph. CW for Makima and sad doomed exploitative relationship narratives

With that said while I’m here, I’ve also made a makiangel spotify playlist, it’s great if I do say so myself

Angel just wanted the days to drag on and blur or for them to not happen at all. For the dark to come, wether it be night or death. He didn’t care about how suspicious the bosses sometimes were. Humans are an-ill intentioned race too after all. Sloth was always his sin. An useful one. A virtue, the way she spoke of it.

Angel devil was a pawn. A tool. Useful and impersonal. All these words were synonymous with his very name, and so there is no need for her to repeat herself as she narrates this. [Makima pov, ficlet]

Makima was a very busy woman. A busy worker. He and just about anyone knew that her schedule was packed down to every hour. So why was she setting time aside to meet with him?

Makima understood the importance of rewards in training, of easing up the pull on the leash just long enough to remind them that at your call you can give them breathing.

Makima calls angel to her office to address his diminished results due to his laziness. She thinks he’s touch starved. She takes his face into her hands gently, Angel doesn’t react. He finds his apathy gets more pronounced when he’s with her, even as the touch makes spiders crawl under his skin. Backs him into a couch he falls-sits on, and she straddles him, touches his chest, lets her hands run for a moment where he does not move. "Do you like this, Angel-kun? Is it not enough as a reward for future hard work?" Goes straight into kissing him, pressing her body to his. This time he does gasp, at the stifling suffocating warmth of it all, even when her skin is slightly cold and firing off all the nerves on his skin. The kiss feels… Good, somehow. He wonders if this thought too was her design, planted into his mind somehow. Angel continued to be lazy on work duty, and Makima continued to touch him when they found themselves alone together.

Angel Devil was special. He’d always been the most complacent of her pawns, how fortunate he was also one of her most powerful.

Her tool. Her touch.

Her tool, her weapon, her messenger. She meticulously made him integrate the Hayakawa circle. Relationships are chain-like bonds, and the more chains one has… Angel Devil is obedient, but as it is, only by complacency.

Touch me Midas / Make me part of your design [My Ordinary Life, The Living Tombstone]

Angel wakes up from a nightmare and he wants to die. He wants to shed a tear at all but he stays dry and empty and hollow. A shell of an imitation of an imitation. He wants to die screaming and crying, his guts embowelled to the floor, everything out of him before he leaves this devilforsaken place for ever. Maybe by his sword. Makima comes visit him. Makima takes him to a movie, he ends up crying uncontrollably.

He claimed to like humans dying. Makima sees the sympathetic glint in his eye that he tries as best he can to make hollow. Her smile doesn’t shift a millimeter. "Oh, Angel… You truly are so kind." In a cute pitying demeaning ways of oh wow u do fulfill your gimmick

This is how Makima chooses to spend her last moments of peace on the beach, while Gun Devil goes to Denji. She hasn’t felt peace since forever, order does not rest, but here the waves bend around her ankles, mold themselves against her, and there is the body of an angel devil ungracefully lying in the sand, wet hair whipping at his face and sticking to false skin as he eats seafoam and bites back words. He asks her if she ever thinks about the people who die instead of her, from her contract. Makima smiles, but there’s an uncharacteristic softness to it, melancholy.

So won't you tell me / What do you know of devotion? / Be grateful for the freedom of lacking emotion [Like a Dog, Ferry]

Makima with Angel like aren’t we so glad to be devils. "If I a devil don’t feel what they call emotions, I can only imagine how awful and pitiful living as a human must be like." And yet they yearn.

Their hairs were both the color of hearts, despite neither having one.

Angel and reading the bible. What was the point, when he was an insulting imitation of an angel, and a devil who couldn’t follow these words of god? He doesn’t like reading, doesn’t undeestand this, feels guilt at every little fact of himself that overwhelms him so much it loops back around to numbness. [I am alas not knowledgeable enough to pull this concept off but it’d be interesting I think. Not very shippy though I suppose, but hey Makima god imagery…]

Connection control. Bond and chain.

Angel Devil has remembered what Makima is many, many times before. He just didn’t remember any of them. The only therapist Makima would have is one that forgets, that she can keep under her thumb fully… An employee with no rights she has full supervision over who happens to be a devil who’s a good listener out of apathy. "Movies are easier" she says. Devils will literally watch movies instead of going to therapy. He’s all singeing of course but gives up on killing her every time until they have a chat. Here it’s a hard reset where every time they do this it’s news to him, but alternatively it could be like the flip of a switch where he remembers every time before immediately at the snap of her finger.

Frankly, he never understood what was so great about Makima. Until…. What there’s to love about makima: she can touch him. Inexorably, ineffably, miracurously.

[Generally, I like when he knows she’s a devil but of course in most cases that can’t be the case, so my go-to explanation is that being a devil cancels out Angel’s lifesucking touch power but that when asked she tells him that she has a devil contract that protects her from his power and he doesn’t push. But alternatively… : ]

She tells him that as part of her contracts others’ lifespans dwindle in her stead when she touches him, and he bears all this guilt as well.

He thought himself above being fooled or charmed by her, but ultimately he fell into the warm comforting duvet of emotionlessness, lethargy and boredom. Denial, just another kind.

They kiss, and it feels unnatural and unfamiliar to both of them. He’s still starved for physical intimacy tho, and he wasn’t difficult. Makima seeing him as the perfect practice dummy He couldn’t hear her breathing, going to sleep against her.

His hair was always like a bush of brambles. She so disliked disorder. Makima personal grooming time, the dog fur with a comb kind.

"You’re very uncaring, you follow orders toughtlessly. Well, you follow orders most times. It’s not exactly respectable, but, I like that about you."

"Why me?" "Devils have no protected rights."

Any love she ever got was coerced. Sacrificial lambs on a false altar.

Like idk he wants to be free in general and free of her and he has this faint feeling pushed down deep in his stomach that she’s the source of that bind and he’s chained to her by her, but also he wants to be subjugated to not feel so much, like Denji. Complacency is his coping mechanism. Don’t care don’t feel everything is out of his control it’s all too big it all means nothing. The fear of angels, the fear of divine higher authority and divine servitude, the fear of the messengers of the order of the world and of how tiny you are.

[arlos-thoughts]

No one cares about me. I'm not real. It all just happens when I'm not there.

[trixiesum]

It hurts. It just hurts. So bad. All the time.

[absurdfishplz]

I think I'm slowly succumbing to madness <3

[greyaugustuspoetry]

a letter to my younger self.

The shed we hid in got taken down

Our like looks different farther from the ground

The girl next door stopped saying hello

She figured out we sucked a long time ago.

We don’t even dance with mama nowadays

Those little moments become such a haze

We’re to big to be carried inside

We stopped knowing how to be held when we cried.

Our dog is in a wooden box sitting by the mantle

Mom made her a spot right next to the candle

We threw rocks at the stars to get her back down

Don’t tell your little brother but she’s not coming back down.

I really am sorry that daddy was so mean

I dont think we’ll get over it and he never got clean

Little brother is becoming too big to hold

I don’t know why but he became cold.

One day you’ll see mom breakdown and cry

All because of our words that we try and justify

You’ll start to understand why people make choices

But the reasons aren’t good ones and they just make us joyless.

And I don’t know why but none of this stops

It will keep coming like heavy raindrops

The growing pains get bigger until our head explodes

What do you do when your whole world corrodes?

One day you’ll start crying and you won’t stop

We will always be waiting for the next shoe to drop

I’m so sorry that I couldn’t get you the moon

I know you thought it could fix things but there’s nothing we can do.

Our dogs are in wooden boxes sitting on the mantle

Daddy made them a spot right next to me and the candles

Our brother screamed at the sky to get us on solid ground

Who will tell our mother that we can’t get back down.

To: Younger me

From: Grey Augustus

P.S. I’m so sorry.

[holdmepainlessly]

"Are you living or are you just existing?"

[apoetstragedy]

[distractionactivated]

Article: "people applying to hundreds of roles without a peep from recruiters [...] the radio silence may not be their fault." "About 81% of recruiters say that their employer posts “ghost jobs,” or positions that either don’t exist or are already filled."

Same article: "Ghost jobs have become so ubiquitous Escalera says that rather than hope for a cultural change, job applicants should adapt to the new normal." Advice on how to do so includes learning to spot fake ads (with what dataset, pray tell?!) and leaving/reading reviews on Glassdoor (hard to do when every fucking job ad is by Random Agency With No Info As To Who The Employer Actually Is).

Just the most fucking craven, cowardly, milquetoast conclusion possible. What the fuck. "This bad behaviour sucks, so just perk up about it and git gud!!"