#life in suicide
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lead balloon (the tumblr post that saved me)
if this comic resonated with you, it would mean the world to me if you donated to this palestinian family's escape fund.
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no creative notes because this isn't that kind of comic.
I know I don’t owe any of you anything but I still felt compelled to write about my long term absence. And I feel far enough away from the dangerous spot I was in to be able to make this comic. I have a therapist now, and she agreed that making this could be a very cathartic gesture, and the start of properly leaving these thoughts behind me. I am still, at seemingly random times, blindsided by fleeting desires to kill myself. They’re always passing urges, but it’s disarming, and uncomfortable. I worry sometimes that my brain’s spent so long thinking only about suicide that it’s forgotten how to think about anything else. Like, now that I've opened that door for myself, I'll never be able to fully shut it again. But I’m trying my best to encourage my mind in other directions. We'll see how that goes.
I am still donating all proceeds from my store to Palestinian causes. So far, I've donated over $15K, not including donations coming from my own pocket or the fundraising streams which jointly raised around $10K. In the time since I made my initial post about where this money would be going, the focus has shifted from aid organisations to directly donating to escape funds.
If you'd like to do the same, you can look at Operation Olive Branch, which hosts hundreds of Palestinian escape funds or donate to Safebow, which has helped facilitate the safe crossing and securing of important medical procedures for over 150 at-risk palestinians since the beginning of the genocide.
#cw: suicidal ideation#cw: suicide#cw: self harm#cw: mental health#cw: depression#i made the balloon the main representation of my self destructive urges for a reason but im not going to explain it#i tried to keep a lot of the details in this vague#it would be my worst nightmare if this comic encouraged someone to hurt themselves#so. please dont#for a long time even the thought of making this comic felt so insipid and narcissistic#with the state of the world as it is#having the only threat to your life be yourself felt so privileged and trite and shameful#but doing this comic made me sit down and process things in full#and im just. very grateful i didn't give in to my thoughts back when i sincerely felt i'd be more useful to the world dead#i also feel the need to say that this wont represent everyone's battle with mental illness. its unfortunately different for all of us#there is no fix-all#and im afraid this might be one of those comics that either resonates a lot or misses the target by a mile#i made it for myself foremost. and now that its done im glad i did it#thank you for reading#and please stay alive#stillindigo art#stillindigo comics
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#girl blog#im just a girl#girlhood#hell is a teenage girl#girl blogger#delusional#female rage#lana del rey#girlcore#lana del ray aka lizzy grant#girly stuff#girl interrupted#manic pixie dream girl#cool girl#this is what makes us girls#esoteric#girl rotting#girly tumblr#feminine urge#ultraviolence#this is girlhood#female insanity#girl boss gaslight gatekeep#cinnamon girl#the virgin suicides#girl interrupted syndrome#female hysteria#lust for life
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Its the daddy issues in me I swear
#girlblogging#this is what makes us girls#im just a girl#girlhood#gaslight gatekeep girlboss#female rage#just girly things#coquette#girl interrupted#hell is a teenage girl#lana del ray aka lizzy grant#playing dangerous#lana unreleased#day in a life of a pretty girl#daddy issues#hayden christensen#jake gyllenhaal#buffalo 66#layla buffalo 66#the virgin suicides moodboard#the virgin suicides#sensitive era#i hate my dad#vintage americana#coquette dollete#dollette
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I love it when he smiles 🥰
#notice how both times its because of deadpool#and both times dp was trying to deal damage#the weapon between them might be a euphemism#deadpool and wolverine#wade wilson#logan howlett#deadpool#wolverine#deadclaws#poolverine#ryan reynolds#hugh jackman#when i say i love when he smiles i mean especially when his life is under threat#especially when he has a gun to his head or a blade at his neck#logan i adore how suicidal you are /hj
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#girlblogger#girlblogging#tumblr girls#2014 girl#lana is god#2014 aesthetic#bring back 2014#lana del rey#2014 tumblr#coquette#coquette dollete#2014 vibes#2014 grunge#2014 revival#female hysteria#dream life#manic pixie dream girl#i’m just a girl#soft girl#cool girl#this is what makes us girls#girlhood#girly aesthetic#this is a girlblog#just girly things#lux lisbon#the virgin suicides#lizzy grant#lana del slay#priscilla presley
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#lizzy grant#lana del rey#this is what makes us girls#coquette#girl interrupted#dream girl#maniac pixie dream girl#female hysteria#lana del ray aka lizzy grant#honeymoonswan#art deco#dolled up#doll life#china doll#the virgin suicides#dollhouse#dolores haze#lolita1997#fawncore#bambi doll#this is a girlblog#nymph aesthetic#lizzy grant aesthetic#sparkjumprobequeen#ldr
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#girlblogging#girlhood#this is what makes us girls#gaslight gatekeep girlboss#im going insane#tumblr girls#cigarette#hell is a teenage girl#lana del rey#nympette#nymph3t#lana del ray aesthetic#lana del ray aka lizzy grant#maybe in another universe#maybe in another life#im just a girl#girly stuff#just girly thoughts#just girly posts#just girly things#whisper girl#the virgin suicides#thought daughter#depressing shit#this is a girlblog#losing the idgaf war#igaf#girl things#thoughts
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Spring
'What if Renchanting duo were the last two left' AU (with a Jesus Christ Superstar coat of paint)
#happy good friday btw#art#mcyt#doodle#doodles#treebark#trafficshipping#3rd life smp#3lsmp#renchanting duo#inthelittlewood#rendog#i have a tagging system to keep by god if anyone sees this it's not my problem#itlw#tw implied suicide#tw death#tw blood#gagagate#technically#comic
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bubbling up definitelynottober - day 6
from god in pieces by @raichett that i read a day or so ago. hi this fic made me feel fucking sick /vpos (and when i read "bubbling up" i just. eyes widen. i can commit crimes with this)
#tw suicide mention#tw sh implied#desert duo#scarian#hermitshipping#trafficshipping#in the fic so jic#3rd life#third life#if school does not exist i wouldve colored this and made more pages just so yk🫵💥💥💥💥💥OUGH#isdoodles#comic#definitelynottober#definitelynottober2024#just remembered i forgot to actually tag it HELEPAJAKHQJHAK
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#lana del rey#lana del rey live#lana del rey aesthetic#this is what makes us girls#cinnamon girl#coquette#coquette girl#girlblogging#coquette aesthetic#girl blogger#lizzy grant#lanadelrey#lana del ray aka lizzy grant#born to die#paradise#ultraviolence#honeymoon#lust for life#norman fucking rockwell#chemtrails over the country club#blue banisters#did you know that there’s a tunnel under ocean blvd#sofia coppola#the virgin suicides#priscilla movie#marie antoinette#female hysteria#manic pixie dream girl#girl interrupted syndrome#girl hysteria
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#2014 tumblr#coquette#girlblogging#lizzy grant#lana del rey#female manipulator#femcel#just girly things#gaslight gatekeep girlboss#black swan#the virgin suicides#lust for life#ultraviolence#i love lana del rey#lana stan#just girly thoughts#im just a girl#just girly posts#girl blogger#girlhood#girly stuff#girl interrupted#manic pixie dream girl#tumblr girls#tumblr memes#meme#relatable#pinterest
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#my edit#trash posting#trash post#trashy coquette#girlblogging#lizzy grant#dreaming away#dreaming my life away#girl interrupted#born to die#just girly things#im just a girl#this is a girlblog#the virgin suicides#sophia coppola#sylvia plath#delusional#female hysteria#female manipulator#trash magic
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#thought daughter#just girly thoughts#sad thoughts#late night thoughts#thinking#this is a girlblog#just girly things#cecilia was the first to go#the virgin suicides#manic pixie dream girl#girl blogger#girlblogging#girlhood#girl blog aesthetic#lana del ray aka lizzy grant#lana del rey#im just a girl#girlblogger#hell is a teenage girl#gaslight gatekeep girlboss#girl interrupted#tumblr girls#cute#this is what makes us girls#life#lana is god#lana del ray aesthetic#lana del rey aesthetic#lana del slay#lana is mother
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#messyr#doodle#this is a joke#i cant go on one day without saying one suicidal statement/joke AAHAHAHAHAA#wym how do i deal with psychological issues and sh*t? just get delusional and youre set for life#shitpost#vent post
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I just want to go to sleep and never wake up again.
#personal#life#thoughts#lost#depressing quotes#dead#tw depression#sad thoughts#suicide#suicidal#death#want to die
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#girlblogging#lana del ray aka lizzy grant#girlhood#tumblr girls#gaslight gatekeep girlboss#lana del ray aesthetic#lana del rey#girlboss fr#hell is a teenage girl#this is what makes us girls#fiona apple#ride lana del rey#lana stan#lizzy grant#lust for life#elizabeth grant#born to die#fourth of july#just a girlblog#girl interrupted#beauttiful girls#my girlblog#this is a girlblog#ifykyk#adrianne lenker#female manipulator#the virgin suicides#black swan#2014 tumblr#shitpost
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