#liek … He means so so so so so so so so much to me I’m gonna throw up
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lucentstarss · 7 months ago
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Sometimes I get hope for unraveled but then I remember how much of an ick I got from keefe when reading unlocked and get sad again
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butchrindou · 25 days ago
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godbless for opposites attract couples u wouldn’t catch me dead or alive matching w rindou for our outfits unless im the one styling him
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soullessjack · 1 year ago
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i think one of the other autistic aspects in jacks character that’s like a little hard to see unless you’re also autistic, because it’s more of a common experience than a visible trait, is the sensitivity he has to people perceiving him as “different.” like, yes he actively wants to be strong and protect people and embrace his powers/what he is for a good purpose, and he even likes to show off and impress or entertain people with them. yes he’s well aware of his capabilities + Most Powerful Being status and literally weaponizes it against their enemies, but then at the same time he’s extremely uncomfortable when people regard him as “different” or dangerous, despite him knowing and owning that in other areas.
when mrs butters says that sam and dean should be afraid of jack bc of how insanely powerful he’s become, he never argues against his power level, only that he’d never hurt them; again, he knows his strength and uses it against various enemies even proudly sometimes. a large part of his character is just grappling with what he is and accepting that, which in turn ties into using it for Good to fight the Evil that’s supposed to be inherent to it. au bobby almost has him thrown out of the camp because he’s a “half breed” who will “inevitably” turn on the humans there because of it, and later on rationalizes that jack must be fully evil now because without his human side (a literal biological aspect that can’t be taken away), all that’s left is Lucifer. jack is essentially feared for being half-angel and looked down on for being half-human, for literally being a lesser human being because his other heritage isn’t human.
while jack obviously embraces their human heritage more, they do also make some effort to accept their angelic heritage for what it lets him do. suffice it to say, “this is who i am and I can’t change it but I can do something with it.” so then, when people view him as something weird or dangerous or simply different, when they see him negatively while he’s actively struggling to make positives out of it, he doesn’t deal with it very well. he strives to be “normal,” while still maintaining the protective role he’s able to fill specifically because he isn’t normal.
and for me, the autistic parallel lies in that directly. the more I’m realizing about myself and my autistic identity, the more I’m able to understand myself and embrace it—and even though my family jokes here and there, they also embrace me and help me feel more comfortable and confident in who I am. but it still feels like almost every day, I’m going through loving myself, messing up because I’m autistic, hating that I’m autistic and stuck like this forever, and learning to love myself again despite my faults. wash rinse repeat. as I become an adult and have increasing responsibility and pressure that I’m unable to take on because I’m autistic, I resent that the world isn’t built for me; that it actively hates and mocks me. countless tiktok core-core videos about how I am fundamentally a lesser human being or not even human to allistics, just because I am autistic. I flip back and forth all the time between “I hate being autistic because I struggle like this and I’ll never stop struggling” and “I love being autistic and I wouldn’t be me if I wasn’t but I hate how difficult the world is because of it.”
and honestly both can be true; I don’t enjoy the executive dysfunction and exhaustion I’d deal with even in an ideal non-ableist society, but I enjoy being able to have special interests and experience certain things in a unique way. and conversely, jack likes being able to protect their loved ones and do cool tricks with their angel powers, but they don’t like being rejected or othered by everyone else because he’s half-angel. self acceptance is incredibly difficult to maintain when you aren’t outwardly accepted, and it’s even worse when you’re actively rejected—which true for anyone, but especially in the autistic experience. and again, even if the world was accepting of autistic people, I would still probably struggle to accept myself personally because of the ways it disables me. in that same way, even tho jack is (mostly) surrounded by people who accept him as he is and are equally as weird or “monstrous,” he still feels ostensibly Different from them and is actively othered from them by heaven and hell and dean in 15x18 arguing about his True Place.
another layer of this is that, even jack’s supportive accepting equally-weird family has their moments of othering him without meaning to; he is fundamentally dangerous [against his will], and they’re not being unreasonable when they’re afraid. i think dean even frames it as, “we aren’t afraid of you, we’re afraid of what you can do to other people,” which means to separate jack’s inherent dangerousness from their personhood, when jack so easily conflates the two (and even that itself can be seen as separating your symptoms/behaviors from your personhood).
a lot of dadstiel ppl might be mad at this, but even cas has the tendency to impose Jack’s value with the paradisal destiny Kelly told him about, despite also saying that Jack only needs to be himself to be loved. neither his or Kelly’s love are conditional on that basis, but it inadvertently created a standard for jack to hold themself to and is part of the reason he seeks to make Something Good out of what he’s been taught is Inherently Bad. he’s expected to succeed and actively wants to, but because their natural tendencies for retaliation or anger or impulsivity (things they view as inherently evil in them), as well as their lack of total control, causes jack to falter in fully succeeding and ergo, continue the struggle to love himself on the basis of meeting cas and kelly’s accidental standard.
it’s not their fault and it isn’t Jack’s fault either, because it’s all fundamentally a matter of genetics and circumstance, but it’s obvious to anyone alive that’s ever struggled with self consciousness and esteem that it’s hard to love yourself when the love you receive from others seemingly falters in a specific area, because then you fixate on the area where their love falters and you either strive to fix it or spiral into a crisis that there will always be some aspect of you that isn’t lovable.
thank you for coming to my ted talk.
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rue-isabelle · 3 months ago
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Aphrodite of Formula 1
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Yn had never imagined working as Toto’s personal assistant would put her in the spotlight. Her days were filled with managing schedules, coordinating meetings, and ensuring the smooth running of the Mercedes team. She loved her job—it was busy yet calm, a perfect balance for her. But what she didn’t realize was how much her presence had captivated the entire Formula 1 paddock.
She was beautiful, yes, but it wasn’t just her looks. Yn was gentle, intelligent, and kindhearted, with an easygoing demeanor that made her magnetic to everyone she met. Her ability to handle pressure while keeping a warm smile never went unnoticed—especially by the drivers.
---
Charles and Alexandra
Charles leaned against the wall of the Mercedes hospitality, watching Yn chat animatedly with Toto. His lips curved into a soft smile as he took in her laughter, the way her eyes sparkled with genuine interest in every conversation.
Alexandra stood nearby, fuming. “I don’t get it,” she muttered under her breath.
“What’s that?” Charles asked, not looking at her.
Alexandra crossed her arms. “What’s so special about her? She’s just… Toto’s assistant.”
Charles finally turned to face her, his smile gone. “Don’t talk about Yn like that.” His tone was sharp, protective.
Alexandra blinked in surprise. “I didn’t mean anything by it, I’m just saying—”
“She’s kind, she’s smart, and she doesn’t need to try. She’s perfect just the way she is. She isnt.tge one.getting jealous about every tiny thing. And to be honest, she is a better person than you will ever be. At least she doesn't use me for fame and my name. She would never be a gold digger and has never done anything to you. You are the one acting fragile and shy, while we both know you are just jealous. Yn has always been a sweetheart to you and i wont let you talk liek that to her.” Charles said firmly.
Alexandra felt her cheeks flush with embarrassment. She had tried everything to mimic Yn’s effortless grace, from her style to her mannerisms, but it only made her feel more inadequate. The problem was that she didn't have Yn big heart and good soul.
Charles sighed and walked away, disappointed to call her his girlfriend, leaving Alexandra standing there, humiliated. Her cheeks were a deep shade of red. Some people nearby were giving her dirty looks. She glanced back at Yn, who was now walking towards the drivers’ paddock, blissfully unaware of the tension she had caused.
---
Carlos and Rebecca
Rebecca wasn’t blind. She could see the way Carlos’s eyes followed Yn every time she entered the room. He would light up like a kid in a candy store, his usually suave demeanor crumbling into something boyish and endearing. Sometimes, he would even beg his cousin to take a picture of Yn, just so he could see her every day. She was his wallpaper on his phone after all.
“Carlos,” Rebecca said one evening as they sat in their hotel room.
“Hmm?” he murmured distractedly, scrolling through his phone, looking at Yn Instagram. Oh, how he wished to be there right now. He was the one sending her flowers every week, paying her rent, and sending her random gifts.
“You’re in love with Yn, aren’t you?”
Carlos froze, his thumb hovering over the screen. “What? No! I mean… she’s great, but—”
Rebecca laughed softly, cutting him off. “It’s okay. I get it.”
Carlos looked at her, guilt written all over his face. “Rebecca, I—”
She shook her head. “Honestly, I don’t blame you. Yn is… amazing.” Her voice softened as she spoke.
Rebecca’s thoughts drifted for a moment, imagining herself with Yn, walking down an aisle, just the two of them in some intimate, fairy-tale wedding. She could see it in front of her, their beach house in Malibu. They would go shopping every day, she would dress Yn in the finest clothes. She could imagine Yn pregnant, carrying their child. She would kiss her breathless, lead her into their bedroom and...
She snapped back to reality and cleared her throat. “I’m not mad. I just wish…”
“Wish what?” Carlos asked cautiously.
Rebecca didn’t answer. Instead, she turned away, her mind swirling with thoughts of Yn’s gentle smile. Oh, how she wished to finally leave Carlos. She played often with the thought about breaking up with Carlos and running away. Oh, what a beautiful dream, a life without Carlos obsession over Yn, while she obsesses over her.
---
Max and Kelly
Max was leaning against the Red Bull garage, trying—and failing—to look casual as Yn walked by. Kelly noticed the way his entire demeanor changed when Yn was around. It was infuriating.
“Max,” Kelly said sharply.
He tore his gaze away from Yn and looked at Kelly. “What?”
“You’re staring at her again.”
Max frowned. “I wasn’t—”
“You were.” Kelly’s voice was bitter. “You act like she’s the only person in the world when she’s here.”
“She’s nice,” Max said defensively. “And she works hard. What’s wrong with that?”
Kelly scoffed. “You’re obsessed with her. Everyone is.”
Max didn’t deny it. Instead, he looked back towards Yn, who was now chatting with George and Oscar. “It’s not like she’s trying to get anyone’s attention. That’s what makes her… different.”
Better, was what he was thinking. There were so many moments where Max knew Kelly was just using him for his fame and that he could be a father to Penelope. He told everyone the age difference didn't matter, but it did. He felt like he was in a relationship with his own mother.
Kelly’s jealousy bubbled over, but she bit her tongue, knowing any outburst would only make Max more defensive. Oh, how she wanted that little disease called Yn to vanish forever from her life.
---
Oscar and Lily
Oscar was shy by nature, and his crush on Yn only amplified it. He could barely string a sentence together when she was around, his cheeks turning a deep shade of red whenever she smiled at him.
“You should talk to her,” Lily said encouragingly.
Oscar shook his head furiously. “I can’t. What would I even say?”
“Anything! Just be yourself,” Lily said with a laugh. “She’d probably find it adorable.”
Oscar groaned. “Lily, she’s way out of my league.”
“Everyone feels that way about her,” Lily said, rolling her eyes. “But she doesn’t act like it. That’s why everyone loves her. Including me, by the way.”
Oscar’s eyes widened. “Wait, what?”
Lily grinned. “What? I can’t appreciate Yn too?”
---
George and Carmen
Carmen adored Yn like a little sister. She often invited her to lunch, bought her small gifts, and even shared personal stories about her relationship with George.
“She’s like family,” Carmen said one evening as she and George prepared for a gala.
George forced a smile, adjusting his tie in the mirror. “Yeah… family.”
Carmen didn’t notice the wistful look in his eyes or the way he always seemed to find excuses to spend more time with Yn. The way he always had to walk up those stairs behind her, to make sure she didn't trip (and to admire her ass). Or his need to always show her how to do every training workout right (imaging her sweaty skin underneath his rough palm for a different scenario)
“You should invite Yn to the gala,” Carmen suggested. “I think she’d enjoy it.”
George’s heart skipped a beat. “You think so?”
“Of course! I’ll text her now,” Carmen said cheerfully. Oh, how excited she was to see her baby again. Her beautiful innocent angle.
George nodded, hiding the turmoil inside. He loved Carmen deeply, but Yn… Yn had a way of making the world seem brighter.
---
Pierre and Kika
Kika and Pierre didn’t hide their admiration for Yn. They often joked about being in a polyamorous relationship with her, though there was a hint of seriousness in their laughter.
“She’s perfect,” Kika said one evening as they lounged in their hotel room.
Pierre grinned. “I know. But don’t get any ideas—she’s mine.”
Kika raised an eyebrow. “Yours? I don’t think so. If anything, she’d pick me.” Deep down, she wished Yn would pick them over anything.
Pierre laughed, shaking his head. “We’ll see about that.” Hoping, to one day call this woman their wife.
Despite their playful rivalry, they both knew Yn was oblivious to their feelings—and to everyone else’s, for that matter.
They didn't need to talk about the things they imagined doing with her. If it could just be easier.
---
Yn hummed to herself as she sorted through some paperwork in Toto’s office. She loved the quiet moments when she could focus on her tasks, unaware of the chaos she caused outside her bubble.
When Toto walked in, he raised an eyebrow. “You’re always so calm. It’s impressive, considering how much you have to deal with.”
Yn smiled. “I like keeping busy. It makes the day go by faster.”
Toto chuckled. “You’re something else, Yn. Don’t ever change.”
She didn’t notice the knowing look Toto gave her or the way the drivers seemed to hover outside the door, hoping for a chance to talk to her. To Yn, it was just another day at work—a job she genuinely loved, with people she genuinely cared about.
Little did she know, the entire grid worshipped her.
Part 2. Part 3
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suzukiblu · 2 months ago
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Day thirty of “obligatory sugar baby Kon” behind the cut, the final day!! Eyyyyy, gang, we did it! Full month of daily updates for this one, haha. Ended up writing about 24k, give or take a few hundred words. prev: (( chrono || non-chrono ))
The alert on his communicator goes off again, and then again a few seconds later. Tim represses another frown. Nobody double-texts him on Tim Drake’s phone. The only people who ever would are Dick and Steph, and Dick never texts Tim Drake’s phone outside of emergency situations where Tim’s not suited-up and Steph doesn’t have Tim Drake’s number at all; they just use burners and the occassional dead drop. So who . . . ? 
The alert goes off a fourth time. Tim definitely doesn’t panic, but also definitely turns his wrist in his lap underneath the fall of his cape and taps the little armored pocket where he hides one of his micro-receivers for situations where he can’t pull the full-sized one out of his utility belt without being obvious about it. Cissie’s distracted with whatever’s distracting Cassie and neither of them can see his eyes behind the lenses of his mask, so it’s not difficult to slip it into his palm and out from under his cape to glance down at as he thumbs it open to wake up the tiny little screen. Four text alerts, and the caller ID is scrolling “UNKNOWN NUMBER” across the screen. 
Okay, so his civilian number is getting spam texts now. Jesus, he was worried, that’s so–
The actual number of the unknown number scrolls across the screen after the text. Tim . . . blinks. 
. . . that’s Kon’s number. Specifically, the number of the phone he bought Kon. Who is literally right outside, according to Cassie, and . . . texting somebody. While he’s out there. While he’s out there, and Tim is in here, and is being Robin. 
Tim has literally no idea how he feels about this situation, and honestly neither does Robin.
He opens the text log, and there are, in fact, four texts from Kon in it. 
so like 
superweird questin 
liek uh rly superweird tbh but uh 
cn u wish me luck babe??
Tim stares blankly at the messages. “Wish me luck”? That’s–what? 
Good luck, Kon, he texts back after a moment, figuring it’s the logical response anyway and assuming that using the other’s real name will help him feel better about whatever he wants the aforementioned “good luck” for. He’s going to have to try and get a read on him when he comes in, see if he can’t work that out. If it’s something to be concerned about . . . 
thx, Kon sends back with a blue heart emoji and literally nothing else. 
Blue, Tim thinks, yet again having to repress a frown. What the hell does a blue heart mean? Does that mean anything? 
He barely bites back the question, because it’s way too risky to ask even if if anyone knows what different-colored heart emojis mean it is definitely a teenage girl and if he texts Steph with a random question with no context attached and then doesn’t stick around to talk she’ll get annoyed and might leave another glitter bomb in their next dead drop. 
He really doesn’t wanna have to explain glitter in his cape to Bruce again. Or worse, explain glitter in his cape to Alfred. Alfred did not appreciate the glitter tracked all over the cave last time. Very, very much did he not appreciate it. 
Maybe Kon just picked it because he likes blue. Or maybe red seemed like too much to him? Or maybe– 
“I’m back!” Suzie announces excitedly as she spills into the room, and Bart bolts through her smoke trail a moment later and stops on a dime right next to the kitchen table. 
“What’s going on?” he asks, wrinkling his nose down at Cissie and Cassie. “Are you crying? Is it because your wig looks weird? It’s not that weird. I mean, kinda.” 
“That HeroWatch magazine thinks it’s your real hair!” Suzie offers brightly. “So it can’t be that weird.” 
“I am not crying and HeroWatch thinks what?!” Cassie demands, whipping her head up to stare at them both with a horrified expression. “It’s not even real hair! It’s like, synthetic! I buy the stupid things off Amazon!” 
“You should stop doing that,” Tim advises reflexively. There are so many ways for that to end badly for her secret identity. Genuinely so many that he doesn’t even know where to start, in fact. 
“And do what instead, exactly?” Cassie asks with a sullen scowl, leaning back just enough to fold her arms. “I can’t just clear out Spirit Halloween every–” 
She cuts herself off and stiffens, then jerks to her feet very quickly and straightens her wig and jacket even quicker. Tim has half a second to remember that while Cassie’s hearing isn’t super, it’s definitely enhanced, and then Kon walks into the room. 
“Yo,” he says, half-waving a hand at the table and then making a face. “Shit, I’m the last one here? Figures.” 
Tim . . . blinks. Blinks again. Cassie looks downright agonized, and Suzie and Bart both tilt their heads in opposite directions. Cissie raises both eyebrows and looks him up and down. 
“Jesus Christ, Kon, that is borderline indecent expo–” she starts incredulously, and Cassie immediately claps a hand over her mouth and leans down to hiss into her ear: “Cissie, you are my best friend and I love you and shut the hell up right the hell NOW.” 
Tim attempts to make his brain work. It needs to, like–do things. Be usable. Functional. Brain . . . able. 
The problem with that is the fact that Kon is currently wearing the tiny little jean shorts that first made Tim aware of the existence of the other’s thighs and the S-shield crop top that people really should have more respect for Superman than to have made and sold commercially with his usual leather jacket and sunglasses and a pair of heavy black boots that Tim also bought him, plus the sapphire stud earring from their last date with a little bit of eyeliner and chipped black nail polish and . . . thighs. Just–thighs. Kon is very, very much wearing thighs right now. 
. . . thighs.
Tim suddenly understands literally everything about the way Cassie came in acting and literally everything she’d said on top of that. Also, he isn’t sure, but he thinks maybe this is worse than the changing room was? Like, this might be worse than the changing room was. Because Kon’s not posing to show himself off like he was there, and “Tim Drake” isn’t here for him to be showing off for. So Kon is, presumably, wearing this outfit just because he wants to be wearing it. 
Tim needs a minute. Or a year. Or maybe a hard reboot and a new identity and a new reality to move to. Not permanently or anything, just until he can remember how to function like a reasonably-normal person again or he needs to send Kon his allowance, whichever comes first. 
It’s going to be the allowance, he already knows. It’s definitely, definitely going to be the allowance. 
“Huh,” Suzie says, looking a little perplexed. 
“Oh, is that what hormones are?” Bart says, looking surprised. “Weird.”
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sexlapis · 1 year ago
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Ho! I loooooooveeee your actor toji fics! Is it possible to get added to the taglist? Thank you ~
Also an idea: a bts scene of reader getting sick on set(perhaps even collapsing) due to fatigue and toji taking care of them- I feel like that'd be such a hit ship moment irl :D
thank you for liking my fics <3 you can be added to the tag list 🩵.
and omg yeah i love that idea of reader overworking themselves and toji looking after them :’). and yeah i didn’t make it a behind the scenes clip i made a short fic abt it bc i do not know when to stop.. like give me an idea and i will fly away w it like a bird liek..i don’t even think this is what you asked for srsly…i hope you don’t mind (but i’ll add it to my tojiyn headcanons hehe)
cw: actor toji x actress reader, hurt/comfort, angst to fluff, swearing, petnames (‘kid’, ik people don’t like this one but i think it’s so sweet & so toji :)), collapsing, mentions of skipping meals/not eating, poor sleeping habits, feelings of loneliness & inadequacy, crying, toji taking care of reader, i made this way more angsty than you asked sorry :(
wc: 2k+
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you dragged yourself through the doors of the studio, immediately bombarded by directors, stylists, scrip writers and other cast members on your way to the dressing room, only fuelling your fatigue and stress.
sleep was a foreign concept at this point. five hours at most. so were healthy, filling meals - the last time you ate was yesterday at noon, and for breakfast today all you had was a cup of coffee, not helping your nervous, exhausted state.
admittedly, you were not doing very well. you felt that your acting was subpar and you felt lonely and isolated on set. while everyone went with their friends for a break or lunch, you sat by yourself in your dressing room, your only company being the silence.
sure, toji was also on set too, but he played a very minor role, so he wasn’t always there. and even when he was sometimes, he would hang out with the other crew members, which wasn’t a problem of course, but it did sting a little when he chose them over you.
you just felt so lonely, anxious and quite frankly upset at yourself and the circumstances you find yourself in.
there are a few knocks at your dressing room door and you weakly tell them to come in.
toji peeks is head in. “hey, kid. we start in five..” he takes a look at your weary face, dark eye bags prominent even through the makeup the stylists caked on and the frown on your lips and just knows something is wrong.
“are you ‘right?” he asks quietly, like you’re a deer who’s about to run away at the slightest of sounds.
“yes, i’m fine.” you lie, a voice in the back of your mind wishing he’d just ignore you like everyone else on this damn set does.
“‘you sure? ‘cause you don’t look-”
“i said im fine! just get out.” you snap, heart beating and breathing heavily at your own outburst.
fuck. you didn’t mean to say that.
but toji doesn’t look offended. he just nods and walks away footsteps fading as you put your head in your hands and sob.
so there you are, acting in front of the camera with your colleague in a scene where toji appears in too and you just seem off. everyone assumes it’s just not your day today and they’re not exactly wrong. you lines were slightly forced, tired and you were jittery and clearly apprehensive, like you didn’t even want to be here.
“cut!” the director calls out, more than annoyed with your behaviour. it was the sixth take and you’re really trying to make it believable, but it’s futile.
“this is the sixth take _____. this is ridiculous. get your act together. let’s take five.”
you look down at your shoes, face hot and chest thudding with embarrassment due to the director calling you out in front of everybody. tears well up in your eyes and you sigh, blinking them away as everyone starts talking again, walking away leaving you standing there like an idiot.
it all becomes too much for you. your empty stomach, oncoming headache, exhausted body, dry mouth, furrowed eyebrows, sweaty palms-
you let your script fall out of your hand as you stumble off the green screen, trying to get to your room before a hand is grabbing your arm. you turn around and it’s toji again.
“hey..” he leans down slightly to your height, scanning you over once. “you don’t look so good, _____-”
you shrug him off, vision becoming blurred with black static and limbs heavy and shaky. “i-i jus’ need to go. to my..uhm-” you stop, rubbing a hand down your face harshly. “i just-”
and then there is black.
౨ৎ
you come to and realise that you are laying on your dressing room couch, staring up at the ceiling. reaching up, you feel a wet, cool cloth on your head. you take it off. still fuzzy and body essentially lethargic, you try to sit up.
“hey, hey, hey.” toji whispers.
oh, toji’s here.
“take it easy.” he helps you sit up on the arm of the couch. he hands you a bottle of water and you drink it like a god.
“wait, what happened?” you ask, still confused and disoriented.
“you fuckin’ fainted that’s what,” he states bluntly. “scared the fuckin’ dogshit outta me.”
“oh.”
toji sits beside you on a chair, looking at you closely. you look down.
“the med team checked you out.” he tells you. “said you fainted, collapsed-whatever the fuck. ‘cos of stress and exhaustion. they even checked your blood sugar and said it was low as fuck.” he pauses. “not dangerously low,” he adds at the sight of your worried expression, “but.. low enough.”
you sigh, falling back on the couch. you think back to how the director shouted at you, how annoyed he was, and how humiliated you felt. tears start to form again and you cover your face with your hands, not wanting to cry in front of toji. you felt like you’ve had enough embarrassment for today.
toji leans forward. “what’s happening with you?”
the way he said it, so soft and concerned, makes the tears fall down and cause sobs to escape your mouth, hiccuped breaths falling from your mouth.
“hey, hey, hey..” toji coos. he reaches to you and makes you sit up again so he can take you into his arms. you let him, sobbing into his shoulder and sucking up all the comfort he gives you. toji’s big hand strokes your hair and the other caresses your back softly.
“shh, sh, sh…” he calms you down a little, you sobs turning into sniffles. he leans back and gives you space but his hands stay planted on your back. “tell toji what’s wrong.”
you hum sadly, looking down and gulping. “i’m..i’m tired. i wanna sleep..”
toji waits for you to continue. he can see you want to say more so he doesn’t hurry you along, he just rubs your back and nods to let you know you’re listening.
“i..” you take a breath, “i dunno what to do..i can’t do this fucking role.. i’m fucking tired half the fucking day and my so called colleagues don’t even like me!” you try to calm yourself down, taking another shaky breath. “and i just feel..lonely all the time..” you cry out the last few words, feeling another sob session coming up and toji pulls you close, letting you ruin his shirt with your tears as he rocks you back and forth in his arms.
“it’s okay, it’s okay..” he coos, resting his face in your hair.
you both stay like that for a few moments, you weeps dying down before toji talks.
“you can play this part, _____. ‘you have any idea how good your are, huh? you can act circles around half ‘these guys.”
you scoff, pulling your lips together. “i dunno about that..”
“‘m serious. _____, you can act, okay? ‘wouldn’t have made it this far if you couldn’t.”
“yeah but..this one’s hard..” you sigh, voice cracking but toji doesn’t let you start again.
“yeah, acting’s hard. but i can help you,” toji cups your wet face with his hands, wiping the tear streaks that paint you face, “we can all help you. the crew, your friends, that bitchass director. i’ll put a gun to everyone’s head to make them fuckin’ help you with this.”
you giggle at his seriousness and he huffs, relieved that you’re relaxing a little.
“they don’t hate you, y’know. everybody on set. the cast. they just think you’re a little shy and quiet. they don’t hate you, okay?” toji reassures you. you nod absentmindedly and he shakes your head from side to side to make you pay attention, making you smile, eyes crinkling even though they’re still tear stricken. “there she is..who the fuck could hate you, huh?”
“ugh, toji.” you roll your eyes, sniffling and rubbing your face. you pull away from him. “ugh..i just want my bed right now.”
“yeah..i know it ain’t my place but told the director that you’re taking a few days off. you need a break, kid.”
you didn’t even argue with him. you couldn’t.
“yeah, i do.” you agree.
suddenly, a loud rumble from your stomach erupts, it was like an earthquake.
toji laughs. “someone’s hungry.”
you groan. “‘m starving. haven’t eaten since yesterday.”
“we’re getting you something to eat.” he states, leaving no room for objections.
toji stands, holding his hand out for you to take. you do, his large, calloused hand dwarfing yours as he helps you stand up. “can you walk?”
“i will if there’s food involved.”
“that’s good.” toji chuckles, “how’s takeout sound?”
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a/n: had to write a whole fic abt this i apologise 🥸 will add the tag list later i just keep forgetting the users </3
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seeingivy · 10 months ago
Text
the moms
ryomen sukuna x f!reader
**part of my best friend's older brother fic
previous part linked here
--
“so was it good?” 
you shove sammy in the side. 
“i don’t have sex and tell, samantha.” you respond, exaggerating every last syllable. 
sammy sticks her tongue out to you in response, before handing you the fork. she was the messiest eater you knew, possibly even worse than yuuji, and she had all but demolished the layers of the triple chocolate cake that the two of you were sharing. 
“would it kill you to eat this like a normal person?” 
“dude, just tell me. this is the fun part about having sex!” 
“what? gossiping about it after?” you ask.  
“obviously.” 
you roll your eyes, before crossing your arms over your chest. 
“well, why don’t you gossip first? you’ve had more sex than i have.” 
“okay, fine. the first time i had sex it was after prom at some random house party. your turn!” 
you give her a glare, which she responds to with a glimmering smile, before gesturing for you to take your turn. that wasn’t the answer you were hoping for when you asked that. 
“well, i made dinner before he came. and he was like…doing the whole teasing thing because he always makes us dinner and not the other way around.” 
“well, i’m shocked you didn’t chop your own hand off during the process.” 
“shut up. anyways, i like initiated it by just giving him the condom.” 
sammy nearly chokes on her bite of the cake. 
“huh?” 
“i just like put it on the table. then he was like going on about how he should be buying the condoms and not me and all that. and even after, he was going off about birth control and plan b and he can buy this one or that one for me and –” 
“as he should. i’d come skin him alive if he didn’t.” 
“yeah but, i just hate when he offers up him money to me sometimes. he won’t let me pay rent, he like so casually offered to pay for grad school if i have to apply again and -” 
“you won’t have to apply again.” 
you shoot her a warning glance, before continuing. 
“i just feel bad. it reminds me a lot of how much mom probably has to pay them back and hasn’t yet. i’ll feel like i’m doing the same thing to him even though he said it doesn’t really matter because i’ll make more money than him down the line and pay him back.” 
sammy pauses. 
“i get what you mean. and it’s not his fault, but maybe he just doesn’t get that…that it’s such a big thing he’s giving away. and you are his girlfriend and you do mean the world to him, but it’s not…” 
“it’s just too much money. i don’t have something liek that to really offer him. i know it’s an investment in me and that he believes in me and that…that i could eventually pay him back, but i just can’t do that i…i just –” 
“well you won’t have to, because you’re going to get in. and if you don’t get in, i will help you apply again. i have a job and you’re my sister.”
you glare at her. 
“i’m serious, y/n. you’re my responsibility and…and you shouldn’t feel bad taking my money to do it. it’s only because i know how strapped you are for money. i know that you’ll really mean to pay it back.” 
“i will pay it all back, though. like the first second i can, i’m going to –” 
sammy leans forward, placing both of her hands on your shoulder and squeezing hard. it’s an almost silly smile that she gives you – and it’s almost like you can see seven year old sammy coming up to the surface. 
“relax. i know you will. and i’ll be waiting for it.” 
you swallow hard. 
“okay fine. fine, fine. you can help me if it gets to that.” 
“okay enough boring talk. was it hot? did you actually orgasm?” sammy asks. 
you curl your nose up in disgust. 
“nice segway.” you deadpan. 
“cmon. he’s hot! i know it was good.” 
you sigh. 
“yes, it was hot. and yes, i did orgasm. twice.” 
sammy always been one for the theatrics. and she’s never one to disappoint – because she’s dramatically clutching her chest and making such shocked faces that it makes you laugh. 
“not one but TWO?” 
you can’t help but smile as she continues her spiel of dramatics and that silent bit of pride – that sukuna was a caring enough partner to actually care about you rather than just himself – simmers up. 
“who was the dom? is he into foreplay? oh…oh did he like the outfit? i bet he probably lost his mind.” 
“him, obviously. but he said that i’m a brat. and yeah he is into it, but he’s kind of always been like that. and he accidentally ripped it because he got too excited but he offered to get me another one and then added that i need lingerie in every existing color on the color spectrum so…” 
“what a dick! i paid for that. and you looked great in it.” 
you reach forward, just close enough where you can wrap your arms around her neck. you can hear her struggling a little, an irritated string of noises coming out of her mouth before you let go. 
“what’s your problem?” 
“i just felt really appreciative of you for a second there.” 
sammy gives you a disgusted look, before cupping the bottom of your chin in her hand. 
“you’re gross, y/n.” 
“you love it!” 
sammy gives you one last glare, before sliding a little pink box over to the side. you shoot her a confused look, before opening it and fighting the urge to laugh. 
it’s a little frosted cupcake, with the word virgin crossed out on it. 
“you’re horrible.” 
“it’s funny!” 
--
“what’s in the box?” sukuna asks. 
sukuna watches as your eyes widen, before you slam the little pink box shut and slide it behind your back. 
you feel your heart sink your chest as sukuna stalks closer, giving you a wide grin, before he stretches his arms – which are irritatingly long – behind you and reaches for it. and before you can even try to snatch it back, he’s turned his back to you as he opens it. 
“who gave you this? or is this just something you bought yourself?” 
“why the hell would i buy that for myself?” 
sukuna laughs as he hands you the box back, which you tuck closer to your chest before you glare at him. 
“it’s okay to celebrate big milestones in our relationship. i get it, sweetheart.” he responds. 
“i did not buy myself a cupcake with the word virgin crossed out on it. sammy gave it to me. she thinks she’s hilarious.” 
sukuna shrugs. 
“you’ve been hanging out with sammy a lot.” 
you smile. 
“dunno. she always invites me to come get coffee with her. the other day i asked her to come study with me and it was really nice.” 
“and you talk about how you’re not a virgin over a matcha while you hang out.” 
you grin. 
“it was actually a slice of cake.” 
sukuna dismissively shakes his head, before leaning his head over your shoulder and eyeing the cupcake. 
“what flavor?” 
“chocolate. you’re not going to like it.” 
he’s leaning over your shoulder, sticking his finger straight into the frosting before licking it off his finger. you watch as he curls his face in disgust as he holds his finger out to you. 
“too sweet. want it?” 
you swipe the rest of the frosting off of his finger as you tuck the box back into the fridge and turn around to sukuna smirking at you. you roll your eyes as you shove him, knowing that this was going to be yet another one of his dirty jokes – that never seemed to cease. 
it’s at that point that you realize that he entirely did it on purpose. and that he had the maturity of a seventeen year old boy at times. 
“you’re immature. i just licked your finger.” you state. 
“you just licked my finger? like you just licked my –” 
you flip him off, earning you a laugh from him, before he wraps his arms around your waist, this time pressing a kiss to the crown of your head. it’s not long before he starts leaving wet kisses on your neck, before you can feel your entire body start to thrum under his touch. 
“c'mon. you’re so tense. let me fix it.” he whispers. 
“i need to iron our clothes. and i’m just worried about later, with the moms, that’s all.” 
his breath tickles as he leans lower, now sucking into the soft spots of your neck, as you whine – his voice rasping against your skin. you try to shake him off, already sporting three marks that you’d need to cover up for tonight, but he persists. 
“who cares?” he murmurs. 
you pout. 
“i care! she’s your mom! she’s my mom! and sammy said they invited yuuji, who is probably going to be pissed that i was going there without him in the first place. and your dad is going to be there which is –” 
sukuna spins you around, tucking his hand under your chin. 
“i don’t give a fuck what my dad thinks. neither should you.” 
“i don’t. but, he…” 
“what?” 
“he says stuff. about yuuji when we go. he could say it about us too, about you.” 
“i don’t care.” 
“well, i do. who gives him the right?”
it was a simmering irritation that had been taking residence in your head for the past few days. you’d always thought it was a little crass – sukuna’s comments about how his mom was spineless at times, how he couldn’t care less if his father lived or died. 
he’d always found your insistence to see your parents at least every two weeks ridiculous, that you and yuuji would go out of your way to trek out there to see them when the entire experience was wholly unpleasant anyways. 
but it was all you thought about now – and maybe even a little haunting that now you found his reasoning sound. that as much as you loved his mom, she really was spineless for making him assume so much responsibility when it should have been her. and his dad – that you would actually prefer it if he did die, just to save the two of them from getting hurt. 
sukuna lifts his hands and squishes your cheeks, so close together that you can’t get a word out. you glare at him in response – irritated that he always seems to somehow shut you up before you can even broach the topic. 
but you drop it, like you almost always do, because all he does is brightly smile at you in response, muttering under his breath about how squishy your cheeks are. and it feels wrong – to curb someone who was so happy and bring up such a sore topic…especially when you two would probably return to the apartment downtrodden in a few hours and have to talk about it anyways. 
“sukuna.” 
he reaches up, rubbing his thumb into your forehead – a gesture he always did when he was trying to get you to stop frowning. 
“eh? what happened to calling me ryomen?” 
“well, you’re being annoying.” 
“quit making that frowny face.” 
“i’m just saying that i want dinner to go well. i don’t want it to go bad because then the moms are going to be upset and yuuji could be too which will be irritating for you and i just –” 
sukuna gives you one lingering kiss before pulling back and resting his forehead against yours. 
“love that you worry about me. but i’ll be fine. just drop it, okay?” he whispers. 
you frown. 
“okay. but the first sign of trouble we’re leaving. three squeezes we fight and leave, two squeezes for shut up and stay.” 
sukuna smiles. 
“deal, pretty girl.” 
--
you stand on the cobblestone walkway for five minutes. mainly because every time sukuna makes an effort to drag you into the house, you pull back on his hand and linger there for a few more seconds, refusing to walk in. 
“we’re already late. one of them is probably having an aneurysm right now.” sukuna states. 
“there’s no way they aren’t watching this all go down from the window. and two more minutes. i’m just trying to compose myself.” 
“well, unfortunately, we’re not in the fucking orchestra, baby. let’s just get it over with.” 
you roll your eyes at him and he tries again – pulling your arm forward – before you pull back. you appreciate that he refuses to walk in without you, but that simmering pool of disgust in your stomach, mainly for sukuna’s dad, was getting even worse now that you were here. and if you went now, you wouldn’t keep the promise you two had made. 
to avoid fights, at all costs. 
“so what are we doing out here?” 
you both turn your heads to find yuuji at your sides, both immediately dropping your hands from one another’s, as you look at him. it fills an ache in your chest – that you used to do this with him and he barely even wanted to see you these days – as you give him a halfhearted smile. 
“ah. just nervous to go in, that’s all.” you respond. 
“oh, the moms will be dying to hear all the details. what’s there to be scared of?” 
“exactly that. that they’re going to ask for details.” 
yuuji leans his head back, laughing like a little kid, before shaking his head and pressing his hands to your shoulders. it fills you with the slightest amount of ease – warm hands on your shoulders, his musky cologne filling your nose – as you walk closer to the door.  
sukuna knocks on the door for the three of you. and they both answer the door in a split second, confirming your suspicions that they really were watching everything go down from the window. 
it’s suffocating – the group hug that the two of them trap you all in. you can hear both yuuji and sukuna groaning in your ears, your own windpipe constricted from your vantage point in the middle, as you hear a string of sweet nothings coming out of their mouths. 
“our little love birds are here!” 
when they let go, freeing the three of you from their deathly grasp, they’re both beaming at you and sukuna so lovingly that it almost freaks you out. you shoot a look to yuuji at your side, whose making his best efforts not to laugh, as he walks past the four of you into the kitchen. 
“okay, okay, let’s see it then!” your mom states. 
“see what?” sukuna asks.   
“do something sweet. give her a kiss, sukuna!” mrs. itadori adds. 
“i will most definitely not be doing that.” sukuna responds, pressing a halfhearted kiss to his mom’s cheek before linking his arm in with yours and dragging you past the two of them. 
they both follow, like overzealous dogs, as you shoot them polite smiles. but the second you catch sight of sammy in the kitchen, with a batch of cupcakes, you wrestle out of sukuna’s grasp to run up to her. 
sammy gives you a smile in recognition when she realizes it’s your pounding steps that she’s hearing and opens her arms up for you. it’s a warm hug – a sickeningly sweet smell of sugar emanating from her – as she whispers into your ear, the two of you snickering. 
“did he like my cupcake?” 
“i hope you die, bitch.” 
“who said that?” your mom asks. 
“sammy.” you respond. 
“y/n.” sammy responds, at the exact same time.
you both snicker as you lean against the counter with her, as sukuna walks over with his arms crossed against his chest. 
“samantha.” he states. 
“ryomen sukuna.” she responds. 
“y/n!” you add. 
the two of them look over at you, irritated looks on their faces. 
“everyone was saying each other’s names really dramatically. i wanted to join in.” you add. 
“i’m going to have a talk with you after dinner, ryomen.” 
“fine, samantha. i look forward to it.” 
despite the rather dramatic and overzealous tones they’re both using, their smiles deceive them entirely. sammy gives him a light shove, that he fully returns, before he walks off into the kitchen. 
and not even two minutes later, you can’t help but abandon helping the sammy with the dishes and instead poke your head out to the table – where sukuna’s now sitting next to yuuji and two seats away from his dad. 
you can tell that the sukuna and yuuji are whispering under their breaths, but entirely unable to discern if it’s pleasant or if they’re two seconds away from ripping each other’s heads off. 
sammy slaps you on the backside of the head. 
“you’re even worse than him. why are you staring at him? you literally live together.” 
“we don’t live together. and how do you even know that?” 
“you told me.” 
“i totally didn’t, but…they’ve been fighting since we started dating. i’m scared one of them is going to smack the other at this point.” 
sammy rolls her eyes. 
“don’t tell me yuuji has some weird complex about you dating his brother. there’s no way he didn’t know sukuna has liked you this entire time.” 
“what are you girls whispering about?” your mom asks. 
you both shoot up, abandoning the door, as you start stacking the plates, shooting the two of them a peachy smile. 
“nothing, mommy. just girl stuff.” you mutter. 
“y/n was staring at sukuna. i was telling her that she has all the time in the world to do that and that she should help me instead.” 
you shoot sammy a glare, as she starts laughing behind her hand, before sukuna’s mom walks up to you, cupping both of your cheeks in her hands. you’re caught off guard by the blatant affection – because it’s not that she hasn’t been fond of you before, but it holds too much of a different weight now. 
“oh sweet girl. i’m so happy for you two, i’ve always known he’s had such a special spot for you.” 
you smile as she reaches forward and presses a wet kiss to your cheek, before wrapping you in one of the tightest hugs to man. you can feel the blood rushing to your head, nervousness returning in full flesh as she lets you go and smiles. 
“so everyone tells me! at this point, it feels like everyone knew but me.” you add. 
“do you remember when he walked to a grocery store to get you a princess bandaid because you thought the tan ones were boring? because i personally remember that and thought –” 
“sammy, quit it. don’t tease your sister.” your mom scolds. 
sammy bites down on her cheeks at the comment, at being berated by your mom, as you frown. you look at her over your shoulder, shaking your head in dismissal, as you grab the last of the dishes and drag them out to the table. 
it was a weird test – the dinner tonight. between you and sammy, since you had just rekindled whatever relationship it was you had, and you and yuuji, since he couldn’t seem to be bothered to really talk to you these days. and between your god given patience and sukuna’s dad, obviously. 
when you walk into the room, sukuna shuffles a seat over, offering you the spot in between him and yuuji, and you shoot him a grateful smile. but you immediately regret sliding into it, realizing that he’s now stuck right next to his dad and across from his mom at the other side.
you reach for sukuna’s hand under the table and he laces his fingers in with yours. when he looks up at you, he frowns and presses his fingers to your cheek. 
“you have a lipstick mark.” sukuna states, rubbing into the softness of your cheek. 
“oh. your mom kissed me.” 
sukuna rolls his eyes. 
“irritating. that’s my thing.” 
sukuna drops his hand as your mom walks in with the last of the plates, everyone shuffling into their seats and giving each other peachy smiles. it’s almost awkward at first, because no one seems to really talk with anyone else. it’s really only the moms interjecting every one in a while, but it’s almost always awkward comments. 
“sammy. you should have brought your boyfriend.” your mom states. 
you shoot your head up. 
“he’s busy.” she responds. 
“he’s always busy. we’d love to meet the guy you spend so much time with. he could even be friends with sukuna!” 
“well, sukuna is annoying, so i doubt it. but sure, sure. next time.” sammy responds, reaching for her glass and downing half of the water in it. 
you shoot her a smile, which she doesn’t really return, as you bite down into the side of your cheek.
the dinner goes well, considering things. it’s obviously very awkward – and they ask way too many overbearing questions that sukuna refuses to answer due to the intrusion. and that you can’t stomach answering either, because yuuji’s almost too attentive eyes at your side guilt you into not confessing. 
“have you guys said i love you yet?” mrs. itadori asks. 
“mom.” sukuna groans.
you two shoot each other a look. 
“if you must know, we have. now talk about something else, literally anything else.” sukuna responds, making such an aggressive cut into his chicken that it loudly clinks against the ceramic of the plate. 
it’s enough to satiate the moms and throw them into their own frenzy of excitement. 
“i’m going to get some water.” yuuji states. 
“i’ll come with!” you respond, shooting him a smile as you both awkwardly pull out of the chairs. 
it’s a quiet walk to the kitchen, as yuuji rummages through the cabinets and produces a glass for the two of you. but luckily enough for you, he’s the one who fills the silence first. 
“i miss you.” he offers. 
you feel your chest clench. 
“really? i really miss you too.” 
“got no time for me anymore now that you’ve got a boyfriend?” he jokes. 
“that’s rich coming from you.” you joke back. 
except when you look up, he’s looking at you with no semblance of a smile on his face, instead an awkward mix between confusion and irritation. 
“what do you mean by that?” 
“oh! i was just kidding!” 
“were you?” 
“it’s just because you’re always with megumi. and he always used to come to our hangouts, that’s all.” 
“do you have a problem with that?” 
“no. but –” 
“because if you did, you should have just said. i thought we were best friends who told each other everything. including when the other was being a bad friend.” yuuji states. 
“i know. i just felt bad and i didn’t really mind him joining.” 
yuuji sighs, before turning to your side and facing you properly this time. it’s a simmering pool of disgust in your stomach – mainly for yourself – that yuuji had tried to build a bridge and you’d immediately burned it down by making a joke that wasn’t appropriate. 
“look. i don’t like fighting with you. and i really miss you, you…you can even ask megumi. talk about it all the time. we have a lot to talk about, obviously, but –” 
you sigh, reaching forward and opening your arms for him. it’s a bright smile that he gives you – characteristically warm, with the soft wrinkles by his eyes. 
“i miss you too.” 
“i’ll uh…promise to be civil then. if sukuna’s the hill you’re willing to die on, then…then i’ll try to get over it.” 
you smile. 
“really?” 
“are you really that shocked? i’d do anything for you.”
“you gave me a pause there.” you add. 
yuuji frowns, before reaching forward, and affectionately ruffling the side of your hair. 
“i love you, y/n. i’m sorry if i didn’t make it seem that way, i just –” 
“i know you love me. i just thought you trusted me more to know i wouldn’t make stupid decisions anymore.” 
yuuji frowns. 
“i don’t think you’re stupid. it was him i didn’t trust.” 
“well, how about you just trust my judgment about him?” 
“i just want you to be with someone who would treat you really well.” 
“and he does treat me really well. i wouldn’t be with him if he didn’t.” 
you reach forward, linking one of your hands in with yuuji’s, and squeeze hard. 
“i appreciate the concern. but i’ll tap out if it’s too much for me.” you affirm. 
yuuji frowns, before halfheartedly shaking his head. 
“i know. just…you’re still my best friend first. you can still come to me if he does something to you…i…i don’t give a shit that he’s my brother.” 
“obviously. you’re my day one.” you respond. 
yuuji gives you a glimmering smile, which you take as a silent win, as you both walk back into the main room. and when you sit back down, sammy shoots you a wide eyed look, before letting her eyes flicker over to sukuna. 
you look over at him at your side, only to find him clenching not only his jaw but his fists under the table. you reach for his leg under the table, squeezing once, which he immediately responds to by taking hold of your hand instead. 
“you’re finally back. don’t you think it’s rude to leave for minutes at a time, y/n, yuuji?” 
you bite down on your lip, feeling the acidic feeling crawl up your throat, as you turn your head to where sukuna’s dad is now staring you down. you shoot sukuna a warning glance, before you swallow the feeling down. 
“i’m sorry. i wasn’t feeling well.” you respond. 
you’re able to cue in that in the few seconds that you and yuuji had stepped into the kitchen, his dad had downed a decent amount of the wine bottle that had been intended for you and sukuna to share. 
and the awkward silence hangs in the air, everyone lowering their heads to focus on pushing their food around on their plate. no one makes an effort to talk again and sukuna’s squeezing your hand so hard that you’re almost positive that he’s cutting your circulation off. 
“what were you and yuuji talking about?” he asks. 
“nothing. we were just getting water, because she wasn’t feeling well.” yuuji responds. 
“right. well, you’re sure there’s nothing going on right? because you’ve always been closer than most.” 
sukuna watches as you and yuuji pinch your eyes shut, the irritation festering in both of your expressions. sukuna remembers that you had mentioned it in passing – that his dad always seemed to suggest that there was something going on between you and yuuji – to avoid talking about megumi. 
“she’s my girlfriend.” sukuna responds. 
“well, like i was saying, you should rethink that.” his dad adds. 
yuuji drops his fork. 
“what?” 
“yuuji, don’t.” sammy whispers. 
“well, i was just saying. if it were me, i would feel strange if my wife was so close with another man. they’ve had hundreds of sleep overs…and you’re really telling me that two teenagers were sleeping in the same bed without doing anything?” 
you feel your eye twitch. 
“and then again, you do have to question her intentions. he makes more money than her, i’m now being told that she lives with him, and…and it begs the question. what does she really bring to the table? at best, student loans?” 
sukuna immediately shoots his head to the left, only to find you looking down at your plate, the strands of your hair obscuring your face. he shakes your hand under the table, only to get two squeezes back. 
no fighting. 
he leans back in his chair, stomach rolling over, only to find yuuji staring bullets into his skin. he gives him a confused look, which only seems to agitate yuuji more. 
“do something.” yuuji whispers. 
“what the hell are you on about? just be quiet.” sukuna responds. 
yuuji slams his utensils down on the plate, before pushing out of his chair. 
“sukuna. help me with the dessert in the kitchen.” yuuji responds, tone scathing. 
you let the two of them shuffle away into the kitchen and restrain yourself from joining them for a full two minutes. but the first shred of a raised voice that you hear is enough to make you push out of your chair and excuse yourself, only to find the two of them glaring at each other. 
“guys…you have to be kidding me.” you state. 
“y/n. you said you would tap out. i think now’s the time.” yuuji states. 
sukuna tilts his head to the side. 
“you said what?” sukuna asks. 
“yuuji. that is in no way what i meant. and why the hell would i tap out?” 
“he’s a dick! sukuna’s letting him talk to you like that and he doesn’t even care.” 
sukuna’s sneering at him. 
“like i said, dipshit, she asked me specifically not to. i actually care enough to listen unlike you.” sukuna responds. 
yuuji’s glaring back. 
“i would never, in good faith, let anyone talk about her like that. maybe that’s the difference between me and you.” 
“you didn’t say shit when we were sitting there.” sukuna states. 
“because you’re supposed to do that. she’s your girlfriend. you should adore her so much that it pisses you off that someone would even raise their voice at her.” 
“and i do. but i love her enough to respect what she wants – which is not fucking fighting in front of our parents, dumbass.” 
yuuji gets a little too close to sukuna and his raised hands make the panic rise up in your chest. you feel a set of footsteps moving before sammy’s standing right at your side, the two of you watching as they continue to argue. 
you refuse to intervene. sukuna was mature enough to deal with it.
“do something.” sammy whispers. 
“what the hell am i supposed to do?” you whisper back. 
“they’re like your little lap dogs. make one stop and the other will follow. mrs. itadori’s like two minutes away from crying.” 
you groan, as sammy gives you a supportive thumbs up, and you inch closer to them. 
it’s the last time you decide to take sammy’s advice. 
because the exact second that you decide to walk closer to them is also when yuuji decides that he’s going to punch sukuna first. except when he pulls his hand back to aim, he backs his fist into your face instead of sukuna’s. 
it’s a burning warmth that’s blooming under your skin, as you clutch your hands to your forehead and block out the light before dropping to your knees. you instinctively try to block the light out as the pulsating rushes under the softness of your eye, the pain sharp. 
you feel your head raise off of the cold tile quickly, sammy’s hands on your cheeks. 
“shit. shit, y/n i’m sorry i didn’t think he’d punch you.” sammy states. 
“sammy, you…you’re such a fucking idiot.” you murmur, in half coherency. 
the first thing that you see in your peripheral vision is sammy and yuuji looking down at you, a warm fear drowning in both of their eyes but with the edges of your vision blurred. you can tell that there’s a slight sheen in yuuji’s eyes, his hands squeezing at your biceps and his voice entirely frantic. 
“y/n. oh my fucking god, i’m so sorry. i didn’t even fucking see you there. i would never fucking hit you.” 
“hey. hey, hey. focus on me.” sammy beckons. 
you avert your gaze to her, now focused on how her fingers seem to be massaging into the back of your head. 
“repeat your name for me.” sammy asks. 
“what? you know my name sammy.” 
“you know where you are?” she asks. 
you can tell what she’s doing. 
“sam, i’m fine. quit doing one of your nursing school exams on me.” 
“follow my finger with your eyes. you hit your head, dumbass.” 
the light is entirely obscured this time, quieting the sharpness of the fluorescent bulb above, when you finally find sukuna in your line of vision, nursing a bag of peas in his hands. he doesn’t say anything, eyes drowning in such guilt that it makes your stomach turn. 
“hey, i’m fine.” you offer.
“sit up for me then doll.” he responds. 
you follow his command, both sammy and yuuji stabilizing you at your side as he brushes his fingers over your eye. you flinch at the sensation, watching as his eyes flicker in hurt, before he presses the peas into the softness of your eyes. he continues to hold it there, before turning to sammy. 
“is she okay, sam?” 
“she didn’t answer all my questions, but i think she was just sassing me. she’s alert but just be on the watch if she gets more confused as she gets home. call me if it gets worse.” sammy offers. 
“anything else i can do besides the ice?” sukuna asks, voice quiet. 
“she’s going to be fine. s’just a bruise. give her an advil for a headache.” sammy responds, reaching forward to ruffle your hair before pressing a kiss to your cheek. 
yuuji takes one of your hands in his, squeezing his hand in yours. 
“y/n, really. i’m so sorry, you have to know that i didn’t mean it.” 
you frown. 
“i know, yuu. no big deal, let’s just…talk about it later, okay? i know it was an accident and…” 
you’re cut off by the feeling of sukuna taking your other hand and squeezing three times. you look over at him, eyes wide. 
“you might not need to tap out yet but i fucking do. can we leave?” he whispers. 
“of course we can. i don’t want to –” 
“i’m getting your bag. stay with sammy.” he responds, gesturing for her to take his place in holding the peas against your face as he stalks out of the room. 
sukuna returns just as fast as he left, bag in his left hand and his right wrapped around your waist as he marches the two of you to the porch. in the few seconds he uses to pull up to the car at the front, you turn to sammy at your side. 
“stay with yuuji. tell him that it’s okay and that he should stay with megumi tonight. i don’t want him to be all upset.” 
“got it. i’ll come by tomorrow, okay?” 
you give her a nod, as she walks you to the passenger side door, where sukuna’s quick to open the door and tuck you into the warmth of the car. 
it’s a quiet ride home. 
--
he’s uncharacteristically inexpressive the second you get back to the apartment. you can tell that it’s not nonchalance – only because he seems to be tending to you so dutifully, but quietly. almost like he can’t muster up something to say. and you can’t think of the right thing either. 
he’s quick to lead you to the bedroom, helping you into your pajamas and carefully pulling the shirt over your injured eye. and even after that, delicately wiping the makeup off of your face, before pressing a real icepack into your eye. 
it’s satisfying to him that you seem to relax under the cooling sensation of the icepack, fluttiern gyur eyes shut like you’re relieved. 
“thanks ryo. i appreciate you taking care of me.” you mumble. 
he lifts his hands up to your neck, using the tips of his fingers to angle your face up so that he can look at you properly in the light. you can see the contempt in his face at the pink swelling now, at how he swallows so hard you can see his adam’s apple bob in his throat. 
“i’m going to kill him.” sukuna whipsers. 
“i don’t care what your dad thinks. i don’t care if he thinks i have nothing to offer you –” 
“not him…i’m talking about fucking yuuij. he fucking punched you, y/n.” 
you cringe. 
“it was an accident.” you respond. 
“i know that. but that’s just the thing. he’s so fucking immature for even attempting to punch me at a family dinner. and as always, he has no fucking awareness of his surroundings or of you, because he just gave you a black eye.” 
you can tell that he’s still simmering – muscles in his neck tense – as you try to diffuse the stiffness and tension. 
“you care so much about little old me?” you joke, giving him a peachy smile. 
he only glares in response. 
“he punched you in your pretty face. stop fucking joking about it. i know how much that shit hurts first hand, y/n, and it's in no way funny to me."
you frown, before standing on your tiptoes to wrap your arms around his neck. he’s quick to return the hug, holding most of your weight around your waist as you sag into him. 
his voice is quiet when it comes out.
"i hate seeing you in pain." he mumbles.
it’s only then that you’re really able to recollect everything – the extremely high energy that the moms seemed to be dishing out, his dad’s clear, abundantly clear disapproval of you, and the fact that you and yuuji seemed to only get farther apart the closer you try to be to him. a
nd that the pinching headache that was starting to settle into the front of your forehead was something sukuna was all to familiar with, at age seven. that maybe the entire ordeal was reminding him of the worst, but that you were at the center of it.
and horribly, it’s a quick thought that passes your mind. that what you and yuujji have going on in between you might be irreparable. that you have to pick, and that you can't fix anything that happened to sukuna when he was little.
you don’t say much at first, only focused on pressing yourself into his skin and leaning against his shoulder. the thought of never recuperating your relationship with yuuji has the tiredness seeping into your bones and wearing you down completely. 
his breaths seem to slow down, muscles relaxing as he only holds you closer, burying his head into the crook of your neck. 
“quit being mad.” you murmur. 
“easier said than done, princess.” he responds. 
“was an accident. i know why it bothers you but...” 
sukuna's quiet, his voice like gravel.
"i don't want to talk about that."
you pull back, immediately regretting mentioning it.
"i'm sorry. i didn't mean to push, i just meant-"
"i know. i just can't stomach reliving that when i can see the bruise on your face. i can't even fucking look at you, you...."
his voice wavers and you press your hand into his cheek, dismissing it.
"whenever you're ready. if you want to."
you frown. sukuna’s quick to pull back and wrap one his hands around your cheek. 
“stop talking about me. you're the one who's hurt, you...you have to let me fix it.” he whispers. 
you can tell that he's trying to change the subject. and that really, some part of him only feels comfortable when he's taking care of someone else. you'll grant it to him for today.
“i’m just tired and that was just a lot with yuuji and i just…” 
you deflate, feeling warm tears rise up in your eyes. that he always wants to take care of you, even when he doesn't feel his best. you can watch as sukuna’s face literally droops, before lifting your face up again. 
that really, he cared about you so earnestly, and yuuji was refusing to see it.
“what is it?” 
“what if yuuji and i are never the same again? what if…what if we just keep getting worse?” 
sukuna frowns. 
“i don’t like that he makes you pick, y/n. but i wouldn’t –” 
“no. no fuck off for a second, god.” 
sukuna’s thrown off by the cursing, as he takes the cue to be quiet and talk. 
“i’d pick you. he’s being a dick and i-i’d always pick you. you’re all the cheesy stuff for me. we’re two stars and two flowers and you…you’re the love of my life. i’d pick you. i just hate that he won’t let me have this thing and how we don’t get to have a big…a big cheesy family who is happy for us besides sammy, who i really love right now.” 
sukuna tucks the stray hair behind your ears, before pressing a kiss to your cheek. 
“it’s not fair! we deserve people who just want to be happy for us, you deserve a good dad who isn’t a dick, i deserve one who is still here, and i’ve always wanted a big wedding and future with a warm family that…that bakes cookies for each other and shit and it just gets more and more obvious that we’ll never get to have that and it makes me angry.” 
sukuna smiles, before pressing his hands to the sides of your waist and lifting you up on to the counter. he takes residence in the spot between your legs, looking up at you with the softest of smiles. 
“i wanted to have a nice dinner where yuuji realized you made me really happy and sammy could admit that she’s bi or a lesbian or experimenting or whatever and i wanted to feel like people really loved me and were finally happy for me after everything that happened.” you add. 
you look down to find sukuna with the smallest whisper of a smile on his face and you can’t help but glare at him. 
“what are you smiling about freak?” you mutter. 
“you want a big cheesy family with me.” 
you roll your eyes. 
“i got hit in the head. let me live.” 
sukuna shakes his head. 
“no take backs, angel.” 
he presses a kiss into the bare skin of your shoulder, before mumbling quietly. 
“no corny family for us, right now. but that doesn’t mean that we can’t make one for ourselves.” 
“hm?” 
“we can make our own big cheesy family. you’d be a really good soccer mom.” 
you snort. 
“you’d run a kindergarten soccer team like it was the military.” you respond. 
“damn right i would. our kid has to be the best.” 
you smile. 
“we’ll be a proper family. you have to make school lunches that every food on the fucking food pyramid in them or whatever and corny notes about how much you love them. and i’ll teach them math and attempt to not make them cry when i help them. we’ll go to shitty concerts together and pretend like it was good and i will obviously fight a snotty nosed child if they ever bother our kids.” 
you poke at his dimples. 
“we’ll rotate on good cop bad cop. i’ll pretend like i’m their favorite when we both know it’ll be you. sammy will be a wine aunt and if yuuji can stop being a fucking bitch, which he will, he’d fucking spoil them rotten.” he adds.
“why are you saying all this?” 
“we’ll make the family we want. s’no point in being upset about it when we’ll have it all. i'll make sure of it.” 
you sigh, before pushing off of the counter and looking up at him. he leans down, pressing a featherlike kiss into the pulsating bruise near your eye, before locking his hands together around your neck. 
“see the vision?” he asks.
“not really. i would hate being a soccer mom. yuuji doesn’t seem like he’s going to let up. and sammy doesn’t like wine, sukuna.” 
sukuna smiles. 
“we’ll get you there. i’ll keep convincing you till you’ll believe it, okay?” 
“are you mad i can’t see it?” 
“no. thought stuff like that was hopeless for me before i met you, so. and fighting with your best friend and hearing shit from people you want more from doesn’t make that easy. but i'll get you there.” 
he reaches forward, tracing a little x over your chest. you give him a nod, before mimicking the same motion on his heart too.
--
next part linked here
an: sometimes i wonder if this fic is ever annoying. but then I ignore it and post the chapter anyways. anyways meow the next chapter im so excited for eek
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ethelcained · 10 months ago
Text
rosemary (matt sturniolo) ⛧°。🦇
they’re both twitch streamers.. planning on writing an actual fic soon so requests are deeply appreciated!! thank you so much for all of the love in my last post <333 it means the world ⭐️⭐️ let me know if you’d like me to turn this into a series (;
777.starlem
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777.starlem 🕯️🦇⋰ ⋱✮ streaming @ 6 pst!!
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aerichandesu star tat pic... you’re a fucking slut
777.starlem just say you want me…
salemywife … i want you 🤗
starboxed will aeri and hamzah stream with you?
hamzahthefantastic U find as he’ll i won’t u
777.starlem i’m gonna hurt you.
slushysalem RUN HAMZAH RUN
aerisgigi martin won’t let you
radvxz wanna kiss you 💋
777.starlem come here
pinkpantheress that fortnite buzzcut is no joke!!
nebruhska245 fr bruh
starstarstarzzz got my cut and came out bald
steve.lacy 😵‍💫😵‍💫
mayawinky gf
777.starlem 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩!!!
dvasdiva pls tell me you’re playing overwatch
sturniolo33luvr please don’t wish that upon us
radioheadenjoyer nah she better play fortnite
ariana_greenblatt the laptop??
777.starlem it’s old dumbass
kdagrande11 favourite sisters 🙏🙏
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matthew.sturniolo
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matthew.sturniolo Streaming now 🍎🩹
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mattpugluvr My girl boner is through the roof
christophersturniolo Bing bang pow
fortniterizzlette69 what is bro even saying 😭
kda4lifesz literally
destinconrad nah fuck YOUR side
matthew.sturniolo WROOONG ❌❌❌
laufey333 someone tell nick his brother nd bf are fighting
taycroom69 i don’t think he cares tbh🫠
madisonbeer is it even safe to play fortnite
matthew.sturniolo We’re playing fall guys
ellamaebae NOT HIM BEING SCARED OF SALEM
snot Brudda
nicolassturniolo Going to eat you
frankoceanlover93 Me too fr
777.starlem oh..
matthew.sturniolo Oh?
salemariana33 ariana what r u doin here??
mattismymunch what happened to him never being able to step foot in mount olympus 😏🤣
fayewebnerd that was before she found out he was cute
beaszapinklvr 👀👀👀
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777.starlem
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777.starlem texted my doctor n i was liek “haiiii :3 how much for 3 prozacs >////<” no reply back )))),:
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radvxz literally so babygirl
777.starlem thank u!!! ^^
christophersturniolo This pic so fucking tuff man
777.starlem on some real shit
sturnisalem777 ??????????
milesmoralestds this is crazy
salemluvrgirl ARE WE GONNA SLIDE PAST HER HANGING OUT WOTH THE TRIPLETS??????
mattisbbgprincess honestly i’m surprised they waited this long
ethelilysmrip she’s too cool for the triplets
salemsfortnitebf @ethelilysmrip are we talking about the same salem orrrrr??? that is the biggest loser
kdalol154 @salemsfortnitebf FR💀💀💀💀
solanamymomma33 i’m really just happy salem and solana are friends idrc ab anything else tbh 🤓
tylerdainventor real !!!! and when salem dates matt and they can both be sister in laws 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩
salemermaid77 nah she’s for the girls
beabadoobeesbzz @salemermaid77 are we gonna ignore the tweet she accidentally posted two months ago orrrrrrr….
sarahsarahsarah @beabadoobeesbzz outta sight outta mind!!
ft.gioo smash
777.starlem 🔄🔄🔄👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩
matthew.sturniolo Cutest scene girl
777.starlem SO YOU THINK IM CUTE 😨😨
444salemwifey FUCK ITS SPREADING
lilghettobitchesdatqueef @matthew.sturniolo SHES MINE‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️ you stay away from her
steve.lacy i am björk
solanaroan speak on it twin
mayawinky it’s true
destinconrad he be serenading me with hyperballad
novacane1728 What a intimidating group of losers
wewecroissant3333 real !! this is why i’m not surprised they’re all a group now.. losers just multiply together like mutants
redveil 👾👾
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streamerupdates
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streamerupdates Famous twitch streamers @777.starlem & @matthemunch are currently streaming together via twitch with other streamers!
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lesbian4salem INSAAAAAAAANE
deftonesdagoats i love how salem and solana are cussing chris and matt tf out and raging 💀😭
clairebeard23 meanwhile hamzah, maya, nick, david, aeri and gio are streaming escape evil drake tycoon on roblox
deftonesdagoats @clairebeard23 insane group of ppl😭😭
rosemary_ am i the only one feeling like a third wheel
deezfrankinuts nah but fr and it’s like i’m used to solana and chris being all googoogaga but matt and salem??? fml
salemluvraeri y’all think that in the last 6 months since #THAT tweet they’ve been…. maybe perhaps??👀👀👀
aeriteenagedirtbag @salemluvaeri Honestly prob cause like sum fishy going on and it’s not ur pussy
scenebitch222 @aeriteenagedirtbag BRO??????
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matthew.sturniolo One year with my vamp 🦇🩹
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777.starlem the sackboy to my domo 🧛🏻🫀🧛🏻‍♀️
matthew.sturniolo I love you sweetheart ❤️‍🩹
playboicartee999 ?????? SICKENING
777.starlem beat the radiohead no head allegations!!!
ethelcainsalem NO FUCKING WAY BRO JUST SAID THAT
peaches_heart3 never beating the loser allegations tho..
mothercain so is she a freak in nebraska?
777.starlem disappointed that you’re even asking this hayden.. like you KNOW that i am, freakys daughter and all 😒😒
pinkpantheress she really got you like ^_^ :3 >_<
matthew.sturniolo She has me going yahoo :3
semiz4llll 😭😭😭FUCK😭😭😭MY😭😭😭LIFE😭😭😭
vampluvr666 when loser pulls loser
sirjohn1738 gotta love this trope
sunnylevine moon x moon
ft.gioo proud of you gang
aerichandesu she’s still my girl btw..
777.starlem duh we’re already married 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩
mattsbbgpook @matthew.sturniolo FIGHT BACK
nicolassturniolo 🧛🏻🧛🏻‍♀️
christophersturniolo Can’t make fun of u for being the single one anymore 😞
rip.brockhampton the only reason we didn’t think they were dating was bc this mf kept making fun of him for not being cuffed wtf
money_420 @rip.brockhampton Naaaah i always knew mf was way too geeked this year 💀 bro has been all “🫠☺️🥰”
ariana_greenblatt don’t you dare hurt my sister 🤬
matthew.sturniolo 🫡🫡🫡
tylermycreator my greenblatts ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹
solanaroan CONGRATS FUCKERS
brentfaiyassfied sicko🤣🤣
oasisza222 can’t believe that silly fucking tweet is what brought them together 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
kalicoochies3 fr fr
dijondress_ i’m soooo drunk @mayawinky
mayawinky @dijondress_ pass
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godmadeaterribleerror · 4 months ago
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I Skip My Pride - No Love Lost Bonus Chapter
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Series Masterlist
Read on A03!
Author's Note: What an amazing opportunity to use that gif. Takes place in Chapter 22. Title from Lay All Your Love On Me by ABBA.
Word Count: 1.3k
Summary/Warnings: You share some music with Ben over text. Usual warnings.
Tags: Soldier Boy/Supe!Female Reader, canon divergence, fluff
whjt is empty v 
What? 
annie and mm are talkinng avout empty v. wat is it. Ben frowned at his phone, watching the little bubbles appear and disappear, and added theyre foghting about something calld a reeahna  
The bubbles disappeared for half a second, and then- 
Ask MM how to spell that. 
Ben ahead of him, where MM and Annie were locked in an argument about something that sounded fucking stupid. 
“How the fuck do you spell that.” 
MM twisted, frowning at him. “Spell what.”
“That weird fucking word you said. The reeahna.” 
“Do you,” Annie paused, exchanging a weird fucking look with MM. “Do you mean Rihanna?” 
“Sure. How the fuck do you spell it.” 
Ben listened as Annie sounded every letter out—slowly, like he was fucking stupid—and entered them into the phone carefully. 
rihanna. 
The response was immediate. Jesus fucking Christ, Ben. 
wat 
She’s a singer. And you’re thinking of MTV. 
whats mtv 
MTV was launched in the 80s. You should know what MTV is. 
Ben paused, then typed, cabel channel 
Good work. I’m proud of you. 
shutt up. why is that shit still aroond 
People love music, celebrities, and drama, and MTV provides all three. 
od they still do thw msuic show 
VMAs?  
sure 
Yes, they do.  
music goood 
What???? 
is musac still good 
I’d say it is, but it’s an incredibly subjective medium. 
wat music do u liek tha most 
Ben knew what music She liked. He’d spent hours listening to all her fucking songs, over and over while she was gone. But the variety had almost killed him with whiplash, and he didn’t have the goddamn time to comb through the infinite amount of songs she seemed to enjoy. If She’d just spell out the best ones, he’d memorize them because he loved Her, and not bother with shit that wasn’t necessary.
The little bubbles had started up again, appearing and disappearing for several seconds before- 
Did you listen to the playlist? 
dont knoww how
Do you want help?
He sighed, glancing up at Annie and MM to ensure they wouldn’t reach back and grab his fucking phone from his hand, and looked back down. yes 
Yes… Please? 
dont puush it 
I’m not helping you if you don’t say please, Benjamin. 
Ben scowled at the screen. pleas 
Thank you. Open the app, go to playlists, and hit the one labeled Benjamin Music Education Initiative. 
Ben rolled his eyes, but followed Her instructions, returning to the messages when he was done. now wat 
Listen to the music, dummy.  
i dont know theese songs 
That’s the point. There was a brief pause—Ben was really starting to hate these stupid fucking bubbles—before, There’s four songs per decade you missed. Three that are important for you to know, and one that I like. I also added some more familiar stuff that I thought you’d like, so you don’t listen to Toxic and explode.  
stuf i like 
Hughie said you like Steely Dan, so I went off of that. Ben grinned at the screen, even as the next message came through. Old fucking man music, by the way. You’re not doing yourself any favors in the “I’m not a goddamn dinosaur, Sunshine” department. 
He wasn’t a fucking dinosaur. Normally, Ben would’ve immediately typed that into the phone with a glare, but something in his chest was making him all fucking soft and fucking happy. He loved Her so fucking much, and it was making him a pussy, but Christ, he couldn’t bring himself to give a flying pig’s fuck. He could picture Her perfect face in a mock frown, almost hear Her voice dropped into that dogshit fucking impression of him as he read her words, and he did like Steely Dan. He had absolutely no memory of telling Hughie that, but Ben didn’t really fucking care if he’d mentioned it and forgotten, because now She knew. And She’d added a few of their songs to the stupid playlist, mixed in with a bunch of shit Ben didn’t recognize. 
doo i have to listeen now 
Do you not want to? 
i dont want to stoop talking to u 
There was a pause, and then, You can do both. They aren’t mutually exclusive. 
why 
Because two apps can run at once.  
Ben blinked, and went back to the playlist, hitting the button labeled play and almost dropping his phone as the music blasted through the car. 
“Shit!” MM turned around the glare at Ben as he smashed his thumb onto the screen, trying to stop the guitar splitting filling up the air. “Use fucking headphones, you asshole, not all of us want to listen to Nirvana right now!” 
“Nobody gave me headphone, you dicksack-“ 
“Here,” Annie threw a pair of thin white wires at Ben’s face, shrugging. “Those are my backups, they were like fifteen dollars. You can keep them.” 
Ben scowled at the alleged headphones. “This is fucking string.” 
“Goddammit,” MM muttered, snatching Ben’s phone and the wires from his hand and chucking them back into his lap, now somehow connected together. “You’re welcome, motherfucker. Go back to sulking about your separation anxiety and use those if you want to listen to music.” 
Ben didn’t know how to use them to listen to music. Headphones were big, and they went over your ears. These couldn’t go over fucking shit. 
how do u use wiires as headpones 
What? 
annie gav me string and said to use is to musicc 
Oh. Those are earbuds, you put them in your ears.  
Ben glanced down at the wires. There were little pieces on the end that looked bigger, and could maybe fit in his ears. 
They did. It felt really goddamn weird, but when he shook his head they didn’t fall out, and when he pressed play again it was like the music was being pushed into his brain.  
i got it 
Good work. 
shut the fhck up 
Rude. Do you like the music? 
its ok. loud 
I’ll take okay and loud. I did start with grunge, so it’ll get quieter.  
its not baad. didnt fuckinng expect it tho 
I have so many old man jokes. 
Ben rolled his eyes. brat 
Cunt. Wait until you get to the 2010s, you’re going to hate it. 
He might. Ben didn’t understand half the pop culture shit in the modern world, but She did, and he trusted her. He wasn’t listening to his music for himself, it was all for her. To find out what fucking music she deemed worthy of showing him, what stuff she loved, so he could love Her better. Maybe manage to understand her insane, genius fucking brain a little more. And he hadn’t been lying, the music wasn’t bad. A lot of it was weird as shit, but none of it made him want to rip off his ears.  
And it was making something inside of Ben all fucking soft and gooey, that She’d successfully figured out what music he liked. That she’d taken the time to do this, just for him. It was the Benjamin Music Education Initiative. This was for Ben, from Her. He fucking loved Her, and she cared about him enough to do this. He was going to memorize every single fucking song on this list, and maybe she’d do it again.  
He’d love Her no matter what. Even when she made old man jokes and called him a cunt, Ben would keep loving Her until it killed him. 
i thogt u hated romeo an juilet 
I do. Why? 
song 
Well, this version has a happy ending, and it’s an excellent fucking song. 
its fine 
It’s amazing. Do not disrespect that song, Pretty Boy. It’s blasphemy.
i said its fuckig fine 
I’m going to make you listen to the whole album. The entire discography. 
He could live with that. If it kept Her at his side, Ben would easily put up with listening to this twangy guitar for a million goddamn years. If it made Her smile, all the fucking better. wahtever 
Don’t test me. I’ll do it.
i no 
Know. 
fuckk off
No. You’re stuck with me. 
Ben could live with that as well.
End Note: Do you guys think Ben would be a swiftie. I feel like he would but he'd be like, angry about it.
If you like this story, please reblog, share, or leave a comment! <3
If you want to be tagged, just ask!
Taglist
@manicjk @lordofthunderthr @artemys-ackles @brtodd
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scorpioriesling · 8 months ago
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So American
✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *
Pairings: Rhysand x reader
Warnings: this is so fluffy oh my
Summary: Rarely do you get to go back to the continent to visit what you once called “home”, and when you do, your newly discovered mate is happy to accompany you — and learn some of the things that make you who you are (a human), as you’ve already learned things about what it is liek to be fae.
SR’s Note: Bare with me guys… this inspo came from Olivia Rodrigo’s song and I was getting all the giggly, feet kicking vibes. I wanted this one to be about Rhys, and the “continent” in this fic is just going to have to be America because it fits the theme I’m rockin with this time pls ENJOY <3 I apologize for how short it is lol
✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *
"And you... ride them for fun?" You glance sidelong at the male to your left as he thumbs through a flyer, brow furrowed in confusion as he studies a page going over details about your city's amusement park. You can't help but giggle at his contemplation over what humans consider "fun".
"Yes, and a lot of people like to ride rollercoasters for the thrill," you explain. He looses a breath, shaking his head slowly and widening his eyes as he flips the page. The afternoon sun gently casts the sidewalk in a golden glow as you walk the streets of your hometown, finally having time with your lovely mate to show him the place you've always called "home". As a couple moves past you on the sidewalk, you pull Rhys close by his elbow to sidestep them; him blissfully unaware, his nose still buried in the pamphlet he'd picked up from the gas station hours ago.
That in itself was quite the revelation.
"Are you hungry, my dear?" You ask. He finally looks up, and smiles softly at you as he notices your touch on his arm. His hand is placed over yours in an instant, and he nods.
"I am," he says. You approach the crosswalk, and he stops.
"We wait until the red," you say, and he rolls his eyes playfully.
"Oh come now, Y/N -- I've seen a stoplight before," he teases. You scoff, and he earns a swat on the arm.
"Hey! I don't know how much you know or don't about the Continent." You say. He quickly kisses the crown of your head, and as the light flashes red, you make your way across the street. You walk quickly to match his pace, his lethal grace propelling him forward at an almost unmatchable speed.
"So, where shall we dine, my dear?" He questions. You bite your lip in ponderment. Glancing around, you pass storefront after storefront -- none of them quite catching your fancy. That is, until you approach the unmistakeable golden arches. You grin mischieveously.
"Rhysand..." you purr. He grins down at you innocently.
"Yes, darling?"
"Have you ever been to a McDonald's?" You ask.
"Why... no, I don't believe I have-"
*✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *
"Rhys, you've got something..." You lick your finger, swiping it across his cheek as you exit the Mickey D's, giggling at your mate's unusual messiness. He grins, chuckling down at you.
"Oh my... what was it?" He asks.
"Ketchup," you grin. Between his practical orgasm over a McDonald's cheeseburger and trying to pay for your food in Prythian currency, you'd say the dinner was... quite eventful, to say the least.
"Well... I can say, I do quite like it. Ketchup, I mean." He tilts his head in thought, and you laugh. "And, McDonald's. Very good choice, Y/N."
"I'm really glad you liked it honey," you say, biting your lip to hold back your smile. "But, that's nothing compared to the fine dining we could have-" He gasps, grapping your hand in his as you continue your walk down the sidewalk.
"You mean to tell me that was not fine dining?" You laugh again, and he smiles at you, gazing into your eyes so intently that you have to pull to the side of the walkway and stop for a moment to return the sentiment.
"No, silly," you say between chuckles. His intense gaze lingers, and he pulls you close to press a kiss to your lips, smiling into you as he does. You wrap your arms around his neck, not caring about the looks you get from the numerous passerbys.
"I'll never tire of hearing that laugh," he says, pulling back slightly. You stare up at him, and his hands brush up and down your sides. Standing on your tip toes, you press a kiss to his cheek before he takes your hand in his once more, pulling you close to soon wrap it around the small of your waist.
"Just wait until I expose you to ice cream-"
"There's... ice cream to be had?"
*✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *
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who1ssheesh · 11 months ago
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NSFW Xanxus with s/o? 👀
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Xanxus NSFW Headcanons
Warnings: seks and swearing; fem!reader; huge OOC; 100% wrong grammar, english still is not my native (it will be one day is this how it works idk); no beta we die like tyl tsuna
Note: tbh, this is really short since I'm still holding back my filthiest thoughts?? The add-on section with sub Xus can be NOT considered serious but those make me raaaaaaaaaawrrr aooga
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• Fucking horndog end of the story leave lieks uwu
• No really, he riles up in a second and in the most inconvenient situations. And if you don’t give him what he wants, Xanxus will be very broody for the whole day. Good luck, you will need one ngl
• Xanxus obviously likes (LOOVES) seeing you in revealing tight clothes, this bitch will drop stuff on purpose just to see your bottom if you're wearing a short skirt that day. He will not hide it, man will just be sitting with the nastiest smile, and you know you have to get that thing up since he won’t
• More of a thighs and ass type tbh. Any breast is good if he can see a nice cleavage.
• I really imagine Xanxus as a big juicy man despite Amano’a art style. His thighs worth dying between, his tiddies look heavy I can hold them bb. And I think he also enjoyed someone not really slim? He loves something to GRAB
• Not even in a sexual way. He will always grab your ass even around people and he can't even give you a coherent answer why. He just stares zero brain head empty - he can't admit out loud he loves your body, what a loser
• HUGE size kink. The nastiest, craziest size kink, he is going to be feral with a small s/o like he really means to snap them in half
• Also has a big dick, so……..can’t complain
• Choke him. Never in your life you can even choke him a little bit, but Xanxus appreciates the effort. Your both fragile feminine hands cannot do anything against him and even grab his neck fully, and that feeling of power over you gets him going.
• Then you feel his hot touch around your throat. He is going to show you how it is done
• Enjoys the fight. Someone too obedient is not his type at all, he gets bored quickly, he loves his girlie to has temperament. Scratch him, grab him, bite him and never hold back. Xanxus enjoys smell of blood, seeing your marks all over him after
• Touch. His. Scars. I’m sorry for involving feelings, but he will like it
• You can never dumbfound him with love-bombing btw. Unlike SOMEONE ahemsqualoahem
“I-i love you”
“Yeah, who doesn’t”
But he still thinks that’s lame and kills the mood
• Yes to power play but GOD FUCK NO WHAT ARE YOU DOING GET THE FUCK OUT YOU FREAK to Daddy kink. He has too much going on with parents and has big issues, especially with fathers. But props to being the first person Xanxus calls a freak
• Get on your knees for him and he’s so WEAK
• Speaking of weak. Xanxus thinks too much with his dick, and you won’t have much problem convincing him about something through a good blowjob (or sex in general). He knows your trick but doesn’t mind, since he’s had a good time, nay? Though sometimes he’ll fuck around and just go away “well, bye now”
• Corruption kink and no one will convince me otherwise. Having a confident skilled woman is good. But how about the most stoic, morally right woman turned into the filthiest nastiest whore just for him? Bonus point if she's a virgin, something clicking in his head. Xanxus enjoys the fact he's one and only or at least, if you break up, he's still your first and no other man will satisfy you she same way (those are his words, not mine)
• Such a dirty talker. But usually Xanxus tries to get an answer from you and just laughs and your fucked-out pathetic state. He won't stop until your eyes are glossy and absolutely empty, his dick is the only thing on your mind.
• Xanxus is shameless but still gets really angry when you two get caught. HOT TAKE. It's not about him btw, he doesn't give a shit about being seen with some one-night-stand but YOU as his partner are different. He wants people hear you and know how good he's making you feel, he wants then to see how hot, awesome, smart, pretty, confident you are BUT! Xanxus is the only one who sees you in the nastiest, most vulnerable state.
• Hot take again - he's not against eating you out. First - being between juicy thick thighs worth dying for, second - he again turns it into a dominating moment, where HE decides if you're having an orgasm.
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Secret-secret headcanons I myself BELIEVE
• Sit on his face. Xanxus will act like a bitch but in the end you will notice he likes it WAY too much and even has some shade of pink on his cheeks
• Just try to dominate him in general. Use the same dirty words he uses for you, don't be scared to insult him. You both are too fucked up and horny at this moment anyways, Xanxus' brain won't even comprehend what you are telling him and that actually he's supposed to get angry
• Xanxus didn't know this is his kink - a beast being tamed, huh?
• After the first time this idiot didn't even talk to you, trying to process what the hell happened. But seeing you the same as always, still treating him as a big smart boss, and that's what everyone believes, makes him hard instantly.
• Xanxus doesn't like sex toys at all (he can make you see stars without any help) but JUST MAYBE that's the first time you get whips? Question mark?
• Nah, he won't just become suddenly submissive, that's not the point. He will insult you, bite you, scratch, choke you, fight against you. If you can't handle him, you don't deserve him in this state, okay?
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st4rgzer · 1 year ago
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Can you write a about the reader loving Matt sm but knowing he doesn’t like her back. Liek don’t have a super happy ending but also don’t have a super sad one. Do it inspired by me and …
UNREQUITED (matt sturniolo)
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summary: the reader experiences some unresponsive feelings from a special someone
genre: angst
cw: taylor swift references maybe…? Is that a warning? Other than that I really don’t think theres much
a/n: as always, @iha8you ‘s request, ly, also dw you’ll get him🙏
This winter had been hell for me, it was always my favorite holiday, the cool air, snow, when it rained and I got to stay home playing boardgames with my mum, or I finally got to read that book that had been collecting dust on my shelf for ages now that it was dark and rainy. No, none of it this year. Every time I hung out with him I held my breath, in fear I’ll do something wrong, take too much space, become too much of a liability. Its stupid, just stupid, I’m his best friend, known him since i was 16 years old, but he seemed so much more older, and wiser.I belittle myself next to him, instead of just letting go, I take a mental note of every little gesture he does that correlates in any way to me, every choice of words, I save them to then divulge them later. It’s draining, not knowing if its just all in your head. If you’ve got it wrong…
“y/n? Hellooo, are you there” i snapped out of my meditative state.I was cross legged on my bedroom floor with two of my closest friends, I didnt even remember what we were talking about anymore.
“yeah sorry i was just distracted” I sighed tying my hair back into a low ponytail and resting my hands on my knees
“we were talking about Matt? Y’know you actually have a chance with him, did you see the way he talked to you earlier?” My friends were only feeding into my delusions, the other nodded in agreement. Even if he did actually see me like that, i dont know what i would do, we’ve been friends since highschool, everything would just be too weird and messy, it wouldn’t be right, no, not with me, not with him.
“No, guys, stop, you’re all just talking nonsense and it just makes everything worse” I groaned, placing my head between my hands.
“C’mon, who could ever leave you?” She says giggling, looking over at my other friend, it wasn’t funny, not in that moment at least. I felt despaired, I know it’s obvious I like him, maybe no one actually takes it seriously when i throw in some extra compliments once in a while of some flirty remarks, but I never try to hide it, except the real thing of course. I know my love should be celebrated, I shouldn’t settle for someone who just tolerates it, but I keep going back to the same thing, always, no matter how many people I see, no matter how many excuses I make to not hang out, its like a moth to a flame, I know im bound to get burnt, trust me. My friends keep convincing me, I feel petty having to listen to them try and make me feel better. Sometimes I come close to actually getting serious then I just think its a waste of time, he just always assumes im fine when my eye contact becomes non existent and my words get mixed up, I dont think he notices it at least, I dont think he ever notices. I guess this means im just doomed, It doesn’t matter how many times my friends reassure me, how many “glances” i pick up from him, Im never going to be one of his main concerns, unrequited. Im always just dimly lit, just enough. I should start trying to accept, settle, “always the bridesmaid, never the bride”.
a/n: this is kind of sht i wrote this at 1:00am, I’ll write more with requests🙏😊😊
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HIII IDK IF UR ACCEPTING REQS BUT HER EI GO
If u don't mind, would u write a Toya Aoyagi x Male reader (if not male gn) decorating whatever place (like weekend garage or the reader's house or Toya's house) with Christmas decorations? Liek they put mistletoes and they realise like "oh." and then they get flustered, and like the reader is strong so he lifts Toya to reach some high places he alone can't reach (altho if Toya's uncomfortable with the heights the reader would make him reach the place and then be liek "u ok toya???" And hug and comfort Toya BRHWHDHW)
IDK feeling like holiday vibes im tlly excited for Christmas ☺️☺️ i hope you're having a good day/night and thank u if u write it or if u read it until here~
okay!! i’m so happy for requests thank you so much!! 😭🫶🏻
also i’m so sorry it’s so late Happy New Year!! 😓😓
here you are!!
notes - ooc, may be a little cringe, tad bit of logic gone but oh well 😔
Underneath The Mistletoe - Toya x male!Reader
“Toya, could you pass me those tinsels?” You ask as you hang a couple of baubles on the overhead lamp. “uh, right.” Toya mumbles and passes you the white decoration.
You had agreed to decorate Weekend Garage while the others went on their own dates. Toya had jumped at the chance to spend time with you alone, having not been able to for some time now due to practices.
You hung the tinsels and move on to a different part. Toya takes a few sprigs of mistletoe from the box, starting to hang them up on the cherry-wood walls. Meanwhile, you follow him and place a couple on the other side. You start humming a Christmas jingle to yourself as you work, hearing him join in after a while. As you decorated, you realised the sound of his voice was getting closer…
Suddenly, he bumps into you as you both realise you were back in the middle, underneath the door entrance.
A mistletoe was already hung up there and both of you were underneath it. Right in the doorway. He doesn’t seem to realise what it meant.. Typical of your adorable clueless idiot. You stare at him, searching his eyes and hoping that he’d catch on by some unknown force of knowledge. He stared right back at you, his cheeks slightly pink-stained. It seemed he was flustered at the intense look you’re giving him.
You smile, amused and just lean down and press a kiss to his soft lips. “This is what it means, love.” You chuckle softly at his stunned look as his expression dissolves into a flustered, “oh.” You gently pet his head and murmur, “Come on, let’s get on with the deco.”
Toya follows, his cute face still pink, his expression barely betraying the slightest hint of nervousness.
You pick up some Christmas lights and pass them to him, pointing to a spot of the wall near the barista area, which was slightly higher than the lamps. “There. I think we can hang some over there.”
Toya nods and goes over while you hang up other strings of lights on the opposite side of the area. As you finish, you hear him letting out a soft sound of him trying to reach the spots.
You chuckle and come up behind him, hoisting him into your arms as you lifted him up to reach the space. He starts to thank you while hanging up the lights and you look up at him, grinning, “You can always ask for help, my love. you know that.” Toya mumbles a soft, “Yeah, yeah, alright..”
⋆��˚.⋆ —
(lowkey gave up since i wrote the parts alrd.. tell me if you want it to be longer!!)
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neighborhood
okay so there’s only 12 houses in my neighborhood (11 not counting mine) and i bike around it really often and am nosy so he’s what i’ve found out.
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first house- indian family, never leaves their house except maybe twice a month, no one has seen their faces (except me), and they’re always dressed in saree
second house- the hottest son ever, and he’s friends with a smash biker. parents don’t really do much besides put their dogs in the front yard and watch. the son goes on walks every tuesday and thursday at 18:45
third house- RACIST HELLA RACIST, called my mom illegal, has a shrine of trump. the wife is dying of cancer and flew to india to try to get a backcloset surgery. weirdly obsessed with the civil war (confederate side). the husband is named paris
fifth house (mine is the fourth)- smash son but he’s in college so he’s barely there, when he is though he goes on runs every morning. daughter is one the drill team and a huge bitch. weird noises come out of their shed and the dad is always doing yard work.
sixth house- they give me death glares a lot bc they don’t like my music, cute dog
seventh house-i’ve seen their nannie’s but not them. they have two wheelchair bound daughters, i’m sorta friends with their nannie’s kids (they’re like three and one)
eighth house-going through a divorce, both parents are smash, their son plays basketball, the mom is a great gardener, daughters bf accidentally flashed his high beams and apologized like twenty times
ninth house- weird almond mom. and i mean weird weird. their daughter is scary and sits by the mailbox in a nightgown unmoving
tenth house- cheating on his wife with two different people. order takeout every day. one of his lovers has blue-green hair
eleventh house- the most athletic kids, football, soccer, track, tennis, baseball, lacrosse. liek literally every sport. honestly super chill and nice
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your-queer-dad · 7 months ago
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hi, dad!
i made some new friends recently and because i’m in a REALLY small non-toxic fandom, i’m friends (or at least moots£ with most people in the fandom :D
and the best part about the fandom is: everyone is queer (i’m trans, gay & caedaroace), everyone is pro-otherkin (i’m a fictkin) and everyone respects the creators and actors boundaries on not sexualising the characters! (other than two people. but one left the fandom (THANK GOD..) and the other i don’t interact with as much because she’s got some… interesting takes…!).
also it means i’m more focused on making fanfiction for my friends and myself instead of for the kudos and comments because it’s a small fandom.
AND it means i’m not constantly exposed to ableism, because in the fandom i was in there was a canonically disabled character who’s disability was erased after a disabled actor experienced discrimination and people forgot about it and were overall ableist to said character… :(
the fandom is a musical that has explicit queer rep (two gay characters, one nonbinary bisexual character, one genderqueer-coded lesbian character and one pansexual character), an accurate depiction of hypersexuality in two characters, an accurate depiction of an abusive relationship an accurate depiction of an autistic character and also accurate depictions of trauma!! :D
but somehow in an all-queer fandom (aside from one person, but he’s chill!) everyone somehow misgenders the nonbinary character even though they explicitly use they/them and gender neutral terms… (“there’s no way THEY’D help you if you killed THEIR girlfriend”, “a MAGE left the prison, THEY could find you today”, “alright, loverMAGE, we’re going in”, “maddox, her LOVER…” “ the MAGE? what do THEY have to do with this?”) … it’s only like one person that i can see (the person who has the… interesting… takes) but it still pisses me off because they’re made to be nonbinary, but because the actor has long hair and he has makeup on and is trans but uses any pronouns (iirc?) people take that as them being gendered.. :(
the way autism is portrayed in this makes me really happy, because the autistic character is never explicitly mentioned as autistic because it’s a medieval-set musical, but he’s confirmed autistic! he has a personality outside of his special interest—which is birds and nature to some extent—and he also DOES swear (once, but STILL!!!), understand sexual references and hes also sarcastic!!
and the way abusive relationships are portrayed, as someone who was in one, makes me so happy. the abuser is called out on his behaviour multiple times, it’s not fetishised, the victim gets another partner who is everything he needed and it also shows how some victims, after the relationship, still have feelings for the abuser or victimise the abuser jshsns
AND all the characters have personalities aside from being queer while queer & trans love is still a main theme!
all the cast is queer too, and so are the writers! and there’s only one guy in the cast who, to my knowledge, is cis. and the thing that makes me really liek ‘jdhahanaj’ is the fact NO ONE MISGENDERS ANYONE (aside from jordan i mean the person with shit opinions… to the nonbinary character :(()
(sorry if this is really rambly, this is my special interest!!!)
i hope you have a good day/afternoon/evening/night !! (it’s 2AM while i’m writing this, so i’m gonna go to sleep..)
— robin
Hey kiddo!!! That sounds incredible!! What's the name of the musical? I'll have to check it out!
- dad x
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georgiapeach30513 · 4 months ago
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I really hate comparing people but I saw on Nancy’s page she made a comparison about what Evans was doing on the side during marvel vs hemsworth and I thought that was an accurate AF comparison. And more positive.
Hemmy and Evans are more of a realistic comparison because they are both in the same Hollywood trifecta, get confused for each other and other Chrises, according to fans, both starred as this blonde superhero beefcakes, often being leveraged in films for their physical appearances rather than acting, both went on to do more voice acting for franchises, both have similar audiences due to Steve and Thor, and were referred to as the Chrises whenever the OG 6 was being talked about. Both may have also been pigeonholed in the industry because of this
They genuinely have great rapport and chemistry and especially in the old avengers interviews where they got paired together it was havoc. They were adorable and they still are but they’re both not really taken as seriously as they could/should.
Hems has also tried his part in villain roles which he does well. But he does revert to franchise and cash grab stuff all the time.
I mean, I personally think most of the Sebastian comparisons are people who are Stevebucky fans who can’t let go. They follow both fandoms but some are not fans of both and only fans of one and liek to come to the other to spite like your other anon said. I know this sounds harsh but like I’m not seeing where these two made any sense but I do see Chris and Chris making sense.
Hemsworth fans are much more lighthearted and they love their big goofball despite him probably not on the path to win any Oscar’s. But he’s fun to watch and nice to look at.
Why can’t more CE fans treat him the way hemsworth fans treat their Chris? They’re both love able in their owns ways and as a pair they’re cute too. I also love Steve and Thor together and think their relationship is underrated.
I just hate the SS comparisons because ITS ALWAYS to spite and compete and it’s like, guys enough already. Let it be. Move on. Haha
That being said you are a fan of both so I completely understand you’re going to get anons for both and often it bleeds together. You’re always very pragmatic as well and I dig that.
I agree that Hemmy is a better comparison. But I also don’t understand why we have to compare him to anyone but himself. It’s how we should live life, the only competition you should have is the person you were yesterday.
But you do bring up excellent points on their careers. And I miss seeing those two together. The Seb and Chris competition I don’t feel is going anywhere anytime soon. I’m tabling the conversation. It just makes no sense to me.
I am a fan of both, and I became a fan long before they were in CATFA. I watched Sebastian on Once Upon A Time in live time. I think that has been able to separate the two as actors. They’ve both have had long careers, and they are both taking their careers in different directions. As they should.
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