#lgbtq thoughts

[animefem]

ways of describing your gender that might come from painful dysphoria but are also very sexist/misogynistic (and often cissexist) and worth actively confronting in yourself, since you might very well be reinforcing gender roles in yourself and others:

joking is 100% fine obviously, but sooo many of these i've seen completely unironically within the lgbtq community (terfs dni)

#1 - i'm not a woman or i don't feel like a woman because... i'm too masculine, hairy, loud, snarky, confident, wish i was tall and buff, want to be the one in charge, don't care if i'm pretty, do unwomanly things, don't like fashion, don't like makeup, don't know how to do small talk, don't understand social cues, enjoy stereotypically masculine interests, like to be the one penetrating during sex, like being rough during sex, like dominating, like being tough, all things that obviously contradict womanhood

#2 - i'm not a man or i don't feel like a man because... i'm too feminine, don't like body hair, have a more feminine or high pitched voice, talk or dress in a stereotypically girly way, enjoy dresses and skirts and dolls and makeup, enjoy stereotypically feminine interests, like being the submissive one and being penetrated (which i see as a "womanly thing" especially if it's in a rough way), like being polite and docile and dainty or being promiscuous and wearing revealing outfits, or even being a sex worker, all things that are girl things to me and make me feel like a woman and aren't something a real man would ever be

#3 - OBVIOUSLY i'm not a man/woman... look how androgynous i look!!! how did that cis person even think i was cis lmao???? i'm too gender nonconforming to actually be a cis man/woman, obviously even i will assume a gender conforming person is cis but a VISIBLY ANDROGYNOUS person like ME??? extra hilarious!!!! (there isn't a specific "trans look" bc trans/nonbinary can look like anything and gnc people exist so this is sexist and transphobic af)

#4 - [anything that implies that being trans/nonbinary is a political statement for the person or a choice to say fuck you to cissexist heteropatriarchal society instead of a very personal identity like being gay or bisexual, it's just a political subculture]

#5 - i'm gay/bi/etc and i believe that my lgbtq identity inherently contradicts me being a cis man/woman

fyi, #5 is said not in the respectful way someone will describe their own personal identity, but rather trying to literally state that being gay/bi/etc inherently means not feeling like a man/woman despite MANY lgbtq men & women being totally connected to their binary gender, feeling a special connection to it through their gayness. this includes binary trans people who have a very unique connection to manhood or womanhood. it's not cool to label gayness or transness as inherently nonbinary. radical sure, but binary lgbtq people have fought FOREVER to be seen as no less of a man/woman than anyone cishet, an obviously homophobic af belief that is pushed by bigots everywhere, to the point where some countries have transition legalized but not homosexuality bc they think that being gay makes you not a real man/woman, so you might as well become a "normal" straight person by transitioning. this shit should be called tf out

#6 - i don't agree with misogyny and i want to distance myself from it politically despite being 100% comfortable with being male and living as male and not having any social or physical dysphoria, or even euphoria, so i use the term nonbinary to show support to women. this is a take i've actually seen passed around lmao, both from transmasc and transfem people

#7 - i just want to make cishet people uncomfortable. it's funny as a joke obviously, i've said i'm gay to make men mad wayyy too many times i get it. but some people when prompted will deadass say that's their only reason to identify as nonbinary. and ngl that sounds like treating transness as a political accessory instead of just a personal identity. which means they think being trans is a choice, like political lesbianism back in the day

there's so many hilarious jokes to make about gender that i love seeing around. so many fun ways to describe gender identity. but let's not feed cishet people's sexism and reinforce the bullshit we've learned growing up, excusing it by giving it a fresh rainbow coat of paint. the last thing the community needs is tighter gender roles. we need to EXPAND not only what it means to be nonbinary, but ALSO what it means to be a binary man or woman!!! it's okay if some of these were signs for you, but the way you speak about it matters

[teafulbisexual]

i miss your arms around me.

[thatsimplepoet]

I’ve never felt more powerful than when I flash my tits at my girlfriend while they’re gaming. Seeing them short circuit for a split second before they blush and smile goofily makes me feel so many things ☺️

[aliceonsaturn]

My favourite character in the weekenders was Lor and now I know why. I wanted that queer swag she had going on.

[mxcat777]

Oooooohhh, that's good!

I’m a cis man sure but i also wanna opt out of the gender binary. None of that shit is my fault or my responsibility and i don’t want any part of it

[riotkittiesarchive]

beware of attack lesbian!! reblog if you too are, indeed, an attack lesbian

[addelaidesupreme]

I'm watching a video essay about a game ive been interested in playing. The creator of the video, who has crossdressed multiple times, makes a "women arent funny" joke, and i suddenly realize ive never witnessed him acknowledge a woman in an uplifting way before.

I'm on a dating app for lgbt+ people. I've stated multiple times on my profile that i would rather lose an arm than recieve nudes without consent. I will be sent five dick pics for every 2 people i talk to that night.

I'm talking with my dad, who informs me he's been trying his best to learn about trans issues. He says the same things steven crowder brings up when trying to ridicule trans people. I gently but firmly correct my father and get told that ive been fed propaganda.

I'm on instagram, under the comments of a post ridiculing someone for being a misogynyst. Someone's left a comment saying "it must be hard being a woman on the internet" and i respond "it is." I will have every aspect of my appearance scrutinized as a reminder that no matter how well i pass, it will never be enough for someone with bad intentions.

I'm back on that dating app for lgbt+ people. I'm messaged by an attractive looking person, but i can see their partner prominently displayed in all but their main photo, oftentimes striking what im sure they thought was a very intimidating pose. Their bio says "looking for a third for our anniversary." I know that even if I did feel up to it, the gruff partner wouldnt approve of me because i don't pass.

I'm at a job interview for a clothing store. I tell the gracefully-dressed woman interviewing me that ever since i began my transition, i've discovered an interest in fashion, and that this job would allow me to dip my toes into the industry in a safe way. I'm told that i've reduced womanhood to a stereotype, and i can tell by her tone that i lost any chance at the job the minute she realized i was trans.

I'm at the same hospital i got facial feminization surgery in, trying to figure out what's wrong with my bowels. When the person behind the desk gives me a wristband with my patient info on it, i notice a single, lonely, letter M. I ask a nurse in private why it would say that despite me having changed it nearly a year prior. They say they have no clue, and bring in paperwork for me to fill out and have it re-changed again.

I'm living with my mom at the time. I'm new to transitioning, and decide to try my hand at voice training. It feels a bit off, but otherwise im feeling neutral toward the whole thing. I try speaking in this new voice to my mom and she laughs. Now, when people ask if i intend to voice train, i find speaking at all difficult for minutes after.

I didnt have some sort of grand message to convey by this. I just had a thought and then that thought spiralled into whatever the hell this became. Some, okay most, might call it complaining; they are right to do so.

[prince-ashitaka]

Lets create a house where yelling means we’re having fun. When you hear a door slam you know it was accidentally pulled with too much strength, not slammed out of anger. When there is silence, it is Contentment, not another passive aggressive fight. The dog is no longer barking to protect, he simply just wants the cats to play with him. Let’s create a safe, warm environment that makes you feel like you can breathe, not hold your breath. Let’s stomp on the eggshells we use to tip toe on. Together we will make this house into a home. And welcome all with open arms into this kind and loving space.

[bedazzledtrashgoblin]

And if the only way I get to see your smiling face looking down at me when I wake is when I fall asleep in class, then so be it

[nekhcore]

HEY YOU!

Yeah, you! Are you trans? Do you like reading books? Or watching movies?

Do you like media about trans men/transmasculine characters but don't know where to find it?

That's sooo crazy because I have this little spreadsheet I'm working on where I'm trying to document all media with protagonists/major characters who are FTM or transmasculine.

The spreadsheet currently has 400+ entries spread across the following categories:

Books

Manga

Memoirs and non-fiction

Movies

TV Shows

Graphic novels / Comics

Webcomics

Audio dramas

Books and movies are also sorted by:

Which character is trans (MC, love interest, antagonist, etc)

If the trans character is POC

The trans character's sexuality (Because I saw lots of transhet guys sad about only being able to find gay romances)

If the author/actor is also trans (if we know for sure)

It's free to use, and free to add to as well! Editing permissions are on, and I check on the spreadsheet every now and then to make sure everything is in order and to clean up.

If you know something that isn't on the list, please add it! You don't have to fill in every single column, but fill it to the best of your abilities.

If you don't want to use the big ass long link below, you can also use: bit.ly/FTM-protags

I made this because I want it to be a community resource. So even if you're not a trans guy or transmasculine person, please reblog!

[animefem]

unfortunate fact... but posts about terfs and female abusers SHOULD be scanned for mysogyny. bc, y'know, women are oppressed. yes even the bigots. yes even the creeps and the monsters. same as disabled people, even evil disabled people STILL should not face ableism from the public. bc their disability is irrelevant. just like a woman's gender is irrelevant, or SHOULD be irrelevant. and bc we're all raised in a mysogynistic society, NONE OF US CAN TELL UNLESS WE EXAMINE WHAT WE ARE SAYING/DOING THROUGH THE LENSE OF FEMINISM. the majority of white people had no clue they were doing something racist against people of color despite clearly harming them, they refused to believe they were affected by their privileged upbringing and white-centric society. same as how the majority of people, including women themselves, will have no clue that they were doing something for the sake of, or emboldened by mysogyny. we need to check ourselves.

truth: terfs, female abusers and female bigots are horrible and harmful and should be rightfully shamed in society

also truth: there is some disgustingly rampant and downright horrifying mysogyny being said about terfs, female abusers and female bigots

and i mean EXPLICITLY MYSOGYNYISTIC, explicitly gender-based threats and bigotry and sexual harassment. jkr was sexually harassed like no one else for being a terf. basically every racist white woman has had disgusting shit all over her comments, and it's normalized bc she's a racist. women being sent death threats and sexual threats is nothing new, it was all over the internet since day one. but we can do better as a community, can't we? we can talk shit about terfs and humiliate terfs for being bigots WITHOUT being a total creep or mysogynist against the terfs??? can't we???? let's do better y'all. some people are shaming terfs for the right reasons. some people are shaming terfs because they love harassing women and humiliating women, they get off on it, and they infiltrate our ranks and WE DON'T CALL IT OUT which only strengthen terfs' belief that non-radfems don't care about women's abuse and put trans rights above women's rights. when did you see the last viral post that mentioned we shouldn't send women sexual threats or gender-based death threats or generally sexualize them for being a bigot?? when???? bc this is how many gender-based crimes happen y'all. if we let this happen to one woman, all women are in danger, and the perpertrators will be emboldened to harm more women because it'll be normalized by then and no one will bat an eye, and it'll happen even to women who aren't abusive/bigoted. and if we let one woman get harmed, we are normalizing gender-based crimes. and the only crimes on earth should be punching a nazi in the face, stealing from the rich and throwing a stink bomb at terfs

[teafulbisexual]

born to chase little homosexual whims... forced to attend math class 😔

[anticapitalistmongoose]

alright boys, girls, neither, both, and those in between we need to clear something up:

if someone says they are queer, they are queer.

no ifs, ands, buts, etc. they are queer.

and if they discover later that they're cishet, great, amazing, wonderful, i'm glad we gave them community when they were figuring themselves out and needed it.

no gatekeeping of queerness here, alright?

because when shit hits the fan queerphobes wont care whether you're a cis gay man who goes by he/him or a bigender aromantic pansexual who goes by it/its

so stop with the respectability politics.

we're a community, fucking act like it.

[oatmealdoodles]

Shout out to our favorite little Queers™

Edit: fixed their sexualities, I was just going off head-canons before

[brooke2valley]

Sometimes things are just... Hard.

(repost) I know sometimes it can be easy to sink into despair. At times everything just feels wrong and dysporia makes it hard to function... I still have hard days sometimes, but it does get easier. I believe in you 💕

[tigergirltail]

Escapism