#lgbt communuty

[sillycourtjester]

"Trans visibility day" fuck they can see us now

[currymaker]

my understanding of rin is that she is lgbt but NOT part of the communuty

[feeling-kinda-sad-ngl]

wait ive been gone for awhile, is your gay counseling like conversion therapy or?

NO SORRY ITS COUNSELING AT THE LGBT COMMUNUTY CENTER IN MY CITY

i just refer(red) to it like that irl when i talk to my friends abt it because its the shorter way to say it since i also have another place i go see a therapist and then i just started to refer to it that way online too 😭😭

[luniastheelf]

What the fuck is a non queer side of the lgbt communuty? 😭

I'm gonna choke

[pastelfeverdreams]

AOA paying homage to Mamamoo’s 2016 MMA’s performance while doing Egotistic? we stan.

[loveamongthesailors]

Can't relate to lebbians who r upset about the lipstick lesbian flag being left out of like a photoset of puppies with pride flags laid over them in Photoshop or whatever coz ive never felt represented by it at any rate :/

[garetthawke]

anyway the continued jokes and disgust at the expense of furries, kinksters, polyamorous people, asexuals, etc. is literally just an extension classic respectiability politics. you know, the ones that alienated trans people and bisexuals during the earlier movement and nonbinary people later on.

there has always been, and always will be, a push to distance the community from what is seen as "not normal" to try and make the community more acceptable to cishets.

we saw trans people get thrown under the bus because gender issues were just "too much" for liberal cishet palets. nonbinary people were just too "confusing" and other pronouns became "an embarrassment."

this has extended down damn near every fucking branch of the LGBT+. there are always people who just don't fit the mold of what the community thinks they can sell to cishets in exchange for some measure of rights and respect.

what furries, kinksters, polyam, and ace people have in common? they're majority LGBT+ communuties already, with roots originating in the community.

that's why there is a dedication to laughing at and mocking them, to belittling them and marking them as too weird. it's respectability politics. remove association of largely queer groups of people from the rest of the community so the cishets don't cringe.

i beg of you to actually examine why you think these jokes are funny. what makes you think these people deserve this treatment? what makes "it's just a joke" not callus when it's about these groups of people? who started these memes?

following trends blindly, especially when it comes to mocking and alienating whole groups of people, is monumentally stupid when you're a minority that has been on that end of things yourself. being gay and trans once was as weird and mockable as any of these other things. imagine yourself being gay or trans now and part of a smaller, largely queer community and still being mocked, by other lgbt people too? it's not pleasant. it's not fair.

[imsociallyanxiousgetoverit]

Funny but I hope they’re okay

One of the funniest coming out moments😂🏳️‍🌈

[that-twink-over-there]

Dude if ace/aro people aren’t a part of the lgbt+ community where the hell do they go for support? I thought that our community was about protecting people and demanding equal rights. Ace/aro people face conversion therapy just like us and we need to support them. They’re outside the norm too- we have to stand together.

Ace/aro people not being "inherently" LGBT doesn't mean they all intrinsically aren't. Lesbian/Gay/Bi/Trans aces or aros are LGBT. But cishet aces just aren't. If an ace/aro person is LGBT, then by all means come to the LGBT community for support, because that's your community.

But there are infinitely more resources available to help cishet people with things like finacial issues, homelessness, and assault. There's no reason for a cishet person to come to LGBT support spaces and organisations, other than their own sense of entitlement.

If ace/aro people need a community where every aro/ace person is a protected member, then make an aro/ace community, instead of trying to wedge cishet people into the LGBT community.

The LGBT community is for the protection and acquisition of rights of LGBT people. Which is why LGBT aces/aros will be protected, and why we advocate for all LGBT rights. But cishet aces/aros aren't lacking any rights; they're cishet.

There are no laws preventing asexuals from doing anything by virtue of them being asexual, and no laws preventing cishets from doing anything because they're cishet. Suddenly combining them and being a cishet ace person doesn't magically remove any rights, because those individual groups aren't legally denied any rights. Why should the LGBT communuty pointlessly advocate for the rights of a social group who have all their rights, and who've historically been our oppressors???

I'm sure there are some aces put into a form of conversion therapy, but that doesn't make cishet aces LGBT just because LGBT people are also put into conversion therapy. There are black people murdered for being black just like LGBT people are murdered for being LGBT, but that doesn't make every black person LGBT.

And the LGBT community isn't for every single human who feels like they're outside the norm. We aren't a club for misfit toys. We're a community formed due to the rampent homophobia and transphobia in society, so LGBT people banded together to protect ourselves from those things and the discrimination they resulted in. If we were just a place for everyone "outside the norm", then we'd invite cishet kinksters and furries and whatever else to join; but we aren't, so we don't.

LGBT people ARE normal, and it's really telling when people want to see us as abnormal to try justifying their place with us.

[purple-haired-faerie]

Hi! Ummm I wanted to ask something, and it’s something I haven’t really ever verbalized (which is the reason I’m on anon for this). Lately, I’ve been questioning whether or not I’m on the ace spectrum. I’m definitely not fully ace, and definitely not aro. I’ve had plenty of romantic crushes before. But... I’ve never had sexual feelings for any of them. Or anyone for that matter. Although I look back and wonder if I did for just one moment have sexual feelings for a guy I liked for a year. (1/7)

(Does that make me demi?) I’m only fifteen, and I know hormones are something that are supposed to be huge in my current stage in life, and I’ve taken into account that maybe I’m just not old enough to have those feelings or fully process them. (Am I?) But... is that how it works? I do experience... I don’t know how to phrase this... being turned on, but it’s under very random certain circumstances, and lasts for a very short period of time. (2/7) 

Not only that, but it’s never strong enough for me to consider... acting on it. Also, it only happens maybe once every couple of months. I’ve done a lot of research, and the only labels that I can think of that could possibly describe me is Gray-Ace, or even demisexual (for that one time, because I got over the guy shortly afterwards, though we remain friends, and maybe I’ve never established a deep enough connection with someone I liked romantically to feel it). (3/7)

I know labels aren’t required, and many people prefer not to have a definitive one, but labels are something that I function well in. I like to know where I am and who I am and exactly how to describe it. But there’s all these thoughts nagging at me all the time. I am a cis, straight (heteroromantic at least), female. I live in a liberal town with liberal and accepting parents. I have friends who I know would support me. (4/7)   

And asexuality seems to be the easiest spectrum to come out as. (Though it’s absolutely not fair for me to say that. There’s a lot of acephobia that many people face and struggle with, and I feel awful even thinking that it’s easy.) I don’t want to feel like I’m an impostor or a wannabe in the LGBT community, and I don’t want to find out later, even years from now, that turns out I’m allosexual and I just didn’t know and everyone will think I lied. (5/7)    

Hell, I’m too young to legally have sex, so telling anyone might make them ask me, “oh, but how do you know if you aren’t legally capable of giving consent about sexual acts? Your brain just may not be ready for it.” or they’ll dismiss it like “you’re too young to be having thoughts and feelings like that. Good for you.” Though, at the same time, I almost want to believe that. I feel strange asking, but where do you think I fit? (6/7)             

I know it’s up to me to decide where to place myself, and someone else isn’t going to be the same, but... I want someone to tell me what they think is going on so I’m not limited to the stuff inside my head. Thank you for listening to all this crap (wow, this was so much longer than I intended) and thank you for any response you feel okay with giving me. :) (7/7)

Firstly I’m touched you trusted me with this, even if you are on Anon, which is fine as this is clealry a big thing for you that you are trying to process and work out for yourself.

I’m going to try and break this up into sections to help me give the best response to you and I hope that even some of it will be useful for you.

So I’m going to do some definitions to make sure we’re defintely on the same page and clear up any confusion.

Asexual: “An asexual person (“ace”, for short) is simply someone who does not experience sexual attraction.  That’s all there is to it.  Aces can be any sex or gender or age or ethnic background or body type, can be rich or poor, can wear any clothing style, and can be any religion or political affiliation.” (From “What is asexuality”)

Aromantic: “An aromantic is a person who experiences little or no romantic attraction to others.” (Psychology Today)

Allosexual: “someone who experiences sexual attraction.” (The gay UK)

Demisexual: “A  demisexual is a person who does not experience sexual attraction unless they form a strong emotional connection with someone. It's more commonly seen in but by no means confined to romantic relationships. Nevertheless, this term does not mean that demisexuals have an incomplete or half-sexuality, nor does it mean that sexual attraction without emotional connection is required for a complete sexuality. In general, demisexuals are not sexually attracted to anyone of any gender; however, when a demisexual is emotionally connected to someone else (whether the feelings are romantic love or deep friendship), the demisexual experiences sexual attraction and desire, but only towards the specific partner or partners” (Seventeen)

Definitions done, from reading everything that you have said, I’d say that for you, your sexual orientation and romantic orientation would fall under different groups. From my understanding, you have romantic feelings for others, but no sexual attraction. You’ve said yiou might have felt a sexual attraction towards someone you’d had feelings for, dor about a year. I’m not here to say wether you actually did, or are still are sure and are assuming what you felt was sexual. I’m not you, I don’t know. My personal opinion is that your attraction could come under “Heteromantic demisexual” or “heterosexual asexual”.

Ultimately you still are 15, so you still have plenty of time to find someone you do have romantic feelings and eventually develop sexual feelings for. In that case you’d be a demisexual. If it doesn’t happen, you’d be an asexual. Whatever happens, you’d still be you and would still be winning at life.

What I’ve heard so many times, is that if you are questioning your sexuality, or at least some part of it, then there is a reason for that, and quite often you arent as allosexual, heterosexual or heteroromantic as you previously thought. But like I said you still have plenty of thime to work that out.

I’m glad that you have a supportive network around you, so when you do feel confident to come out with whatever your orientation is, those around you will still love and sccept you. And as far as what you think is the easiest thing to come out, well let me tell you a few things. Coming out, whatever it is, is hard. yes some may be more understtod that others, but it’s still hard. You’re still whatever sexuality you are, regardless of other people’s ignorance. If you identify as being asexual then you’re asexual and are part of the LGBTQ communuty and no one can tell you otherwise. If, after some more self-discovery and life experience you realise that it’s a label that no longer describes how you feel, then thats also fine. If other people disagree, then pity their prejudice and ignorance be damned.

On a final note: just because you are below the age of consent doesn’t mean that your orientation and feelings is any less valid. We don’t grow up with no sexual or romantic feelings, then wake up on our birthday when we can legally give consent, full of sexual and romantic feeling and knowing exactly what our orientation is. That’s not how things work. You can still be questioning and working it out before hand. And that’s OK!

I hope this helps Anon and that you find something that describes how you feel

What is asexuality: http://www.whatisasexuality.com/intro/    

Psychology Today: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/living-single/201710/s-so-aromantic             

Seventeen: https://www.seventeen.com/love/a21999166/demisexual-meaning-definition-signs/   

The Gay Uk https://www.thegayuk.com/big-gay-glossary-allosexual/

[werewolf-cuddles]

feedmenugnugs replied to your post “You know, these braindead conspiracy theorists who keep insisting...”

What is going on with the OW communuty. Ive been gone for a year and it feels like everyones pissed at everyone?

Basically, a few days ago, they released a new short Overwatch story called “Bastet”, which focused primarily on Ana and Soldier 76. One detail from this story that people very quickly picked up on was that Soldier 76 had once been in a romantic relationship with another man.

This has provoked several different reactions from the community. Aside from the people who are pleased about this reveal, as having both of Overwatch’s flagship characters be canonically gay is important for LGBT representation, there’s a lot of people who are unhappy for various reasons.

There are some people who are complaining that it makes no sense for Soldier 76 to be gay, because “he showed no traits of his sexuality before”, or even claiming that Blizzard “retconned” his sexuality “for woke points”. So, basically just cynical assholes.

And there are some people saying that Soldier 76 being gay “isn’t enough”, an attitude which honestly reeks of entitlement to me.

The most annoying by far though are the ones who are insisting that Blizzard only revealed Soldier 76′s sexuality to distract people from several scandals related to the company. Whether the scandal they’re “trying to distract us from” is the infamous Diablo Mobile presentation from a few months back, the shutting down of the Heroes of the Storm competitive league last month, or even recent scandals like the former employee who suffered racial discrimination and abuse while working in Blizzard’s eSports division, or the Overwatch Contenders player who was exposed as a fraud, seems to vary depending on who’s telling the story.

To be honest, these people irk me the most, because apparently the concept that it’s nothing more than unfortunate timing is completely alien to these people. They’re so dead set on believing their own bullshit that they outright refuse to consider the possibility that they’re wrong.

[tumblunni]

Randomly remembered how i couldnt stop pronouncing LGBTA+ as "ludgebutter" in my head for several months after i first heard it. I dunno why but im really bad at turning acronyms into words instead of actually remembering the damn letters. Which is a tad bit of a problem when youre in the LGBTQ communuty yeah. I'm not even sure if LGBTQ is the current agreed upon one, is it LGBTQIA now? I feel really guilty about it cos i worry if i ever talk aboyt sucking at remembering acronyms cos of my brain badness, then people could take it as if im making fun of the acronyms or something? I hate all those people who are like "blah blah trans/asexual/queer/etc people arent real and also somehow cause all homophobia by making the acronym longer" or something. My inabiluty to memorize strings of letters is 100% my own problem and nothing to do with excluding people from the community!

Anyway thats why i sometimes mess up and just write LGBT, even though im one of the peoople included in the extra letters. Im just real bad at letters!

[itsdetachable]

You would literally exclude ppl because you want to use an acronym that only acknowledges a portion of the ppl who are part of our communuty but I'M the asshole lol

Queer has been reclaimed for decades. Dykes on Bikes have been around since 1976. Slurs can be reclaimed and while you can object to using them yourself you can't object to other ppl using them for themselves and their communities.

There's ridiculous amounts of resources online now that document our history and ecplain our roots and growth and everything but instead of using those resources ppl like you prefer to stick to your imagined world of what LGBT is and refuse to accept any other aort of viewpoint.

You're exactly the type of person that NEEDS op's post but it obviously went in one ear and out the other bc it didnt fit your ideal.

What and who is included in the lgbt/queer/gay(general) communities aren’t always super clear cut actually and like... that’s fine.

[who-is-page]

Uh yeah heteroflexible means straight but open to dating someone of the same gender if it was the right person. That what i immediately thought of when you responded to that person but youre right, I did phrase that poorly. I guess while were on the subject, what do you think abt hetereoflexible people with regards to the lgbt communuty?

Hell if I know, man. I'd personally say that it comes down to the individual and their own interpretation of their identity.

[aroace-people-are-lgtbq]

Anon from earlier about LGBTQ+ gatekeeping again... I know people are commenting that it's only on tumblr that this happens, but in my experience that has not been true. I've had real life LGBTQ+ friends say that while being ace is valid, it has no place in the alphabet soup, and no place at Pride parades, etc. and that we should form our own society-- it just gets discouraging.

yikes, i’m sorry. that’s not right of them. I don;t know where you are, but are there any other places or LGBTQ centers you can go? 

It can happen in real life, but remember that these friends of yours don’t speak for the communuty as a whole. I don’t know if you are still talking to these people, but think you need to find new lgtq+ people to talk to; some who respect your right to exist in the community and particpate in it 

honestly, and this is just my opinion, if you say “I think ace is valid just not LGBT,” I don’t believe the first half is true

-Mod ama

[garetthawke]

man i think one of the ways we've sorely gone wrong in activism is the idea that just because communities are seperately identified that we don't have to be involved in their activism...like there are communities that aren't strictly speaking lgbt but i think the lgbt has full obligations to remember and fight for as well.

it goes down smaller within the community, e.g. gay folks need to remember and protect trans people, but the discourse and politics surrounding strict community definition have gone a long way towards isolating the community from outside allyship, and we've left people in the dust we should be looking after.

everyone is so concerned with their opinions on whether intersex is counted within the lgbt, they've forgotten that when it comes to activism, it really doesn't matter. the intersex community has stood side by side with all the rest of us for decades, and we should be well obligated to remember and fight for them anyway. but arguing all the reasons why they shouldn't be counted as lgbt is what i see instead, from people who will never lift a finger to help intersex people.

and there is overlap with many other communities, like polyam and ace communities. there's shared interests with others, like marriage equality for disabled people and even racial issues. things that SHOULD matter to us lgbt people, but they get ignored instead!! and everyone cares more about whether a letter is on a dumbass acronym than if these people are facing struggles and whether they can help them.

"gay" once covered anyone who was considered "sexually deviant." that used to include the sex workers, who often worked side by side with trans women and gay folks if they weren't one themselves. now our understanding of our identities and communuties and words has rounded out, we understand what "gay" means and who it doesn't include.

but it makes me incredibly sad that in the process we have left behind sex workers, vulnerable women and even sex workers who are gay and trans, because the respectability politics that played out over the years. they get targeted by radfems - swerfs - the very same people who attack trans women, and yet we don't offer the same protection against them. all too often i see people inside the damn community repeat swerf rhetoric instead.

sex workers should be a group of people we care about and advocate for. they overlap with our community quite often, and it's not about fucking identities or internet arguments about who "counts" as part of the community. its about who is struggling, who is oppressed, who the government beats down and denies rights. often times they will have considerably more overlap with the lgbt than anyone else.

we should CARE. these are our roots. sex workers stood beside trans women and gay folks because ALL of us were illegal, what they had to do to survive and what they did with their sex lives was controlled. and guess what? sex workers never had their stonewall. we can get married, but sex workers are still illegal and face horrific abuse and death rates. and why don't i see the lgbt standing UP for them??? where are yall?? people shouldn't have to be strictly within the definition of "lgbt" for us to care about their oppression and to recognize where their concerns overlap with our own. do y'all really think we can make that much progress when our government can still moderate our sex lives and bodies?

and this includes homeless people, mentally ill folks, abuse and rape victims, addicts. lgbt make up a lot of those groups, and we need to CARE about their rights and their struggles!! even just feminist body rights issues - if a cis woman has to struggle so hard for abortions or to get her tubes tied, for rights to her body, how can we expect them to let us trans folks have any control over our bodies?

i am literally so DONE with the most "activism" lgbt people participating in being arguments over community definition. we have neglected our obligations in allocating so much energy towards such petty shit - we've abandoned vulnerable people to a system we should be dedicated to fighting against. it doesn't MATTER if they're "not part of the community." fighting the system means you're going to have to suck it up and care about ALL the people that the system is abusing, the end.