#let��s learn Aelin

[throneofsapphics]

first time

first time. 

poly!Rowaelin x f!Reader

Summary: Y/n’s first time with Rowan and Aelin. 

Word Count: ~2.6k

Warnings: nsfw, pure smut, light d/s dynamics, mention of blood, third mate trope 

Aelin grabbed my hand and tugged me towards the bedroom. As soon as we’d entered, she gently pressed me up against the door, her body melting into mine. Her hands roamed over my shoulders, down my arms, all the way to the tips of my fingers, before tracing up my ribs. I didn’t know what to do, didn’t know where to put my hands, or anything. So, I gently slid them up her body, skirting around her breasts, and letting them loop around her neck. She’d keened into me slightly - good, I did something right. 

“Calm down love.” She whispered, “no need to be nervous.” 

“Easy for you to say.” I mumbled, as she placed a kiss to the corner of my mouth, and then the other side, before capturing my lips in a gentle kiss. Her hand tilted my chin, placing my head at the perfect angle for her. It was soothing, comforting, and sweet. I found my body relaxing slightly, myself easing into her. My arms tugged her a bit closer, and she chuckled. Her hands gripped my waist, and turned me around, walking me back until the back of my knees hit the mattress. She grinned at me, just before her arms looped under my thighs, and I squealed as she threw me on the bed. Right into the middle. She laughed and crawled after me. I spotted Rowan in the corner of the room, standing next to the door with his arms crossed, but a faint hint of amusement showed on that stony face. 

Aelin pouted. “Look at me,” and her fingers gripped my jaw, yanking so I’d look at her. Her eyes had darkened slightly, with lust. “Better.” She praised, and I felt my cheeks pink. She did too, because her fingers drifted over it, over the now pink skin, “I love this.” 

I almost blanched at that word. Love. But before I could freak out, Aelin kept talking. “Tonight is about you, do you understand?” 

I swallowed, but nodded. “Yes.” 

“Using your words, look at you - learning already.” She crooned, one hand roughly grabbing my breast, squeezing. I moaned, my body arching up into her, craving her, wanting to be as close as possible. I reached up for her, but her other hand grabbed my wrists, pinning them up above my head. “Can you keep them there, or will I have to tie them to the headboard?” 

“I’ll keep them there.” I breathed, feeling myself get wetter and wetter with each new thing she said. 

“How good.” I heard Rowan from the side. He was teasing. “I wonder how long that will last.” 

I looked back and forth between him and Aelin. “Rowan.” She said, her voice a warning, but I saw that glint in her eyes. 

“I think you’re being too gentle.” Rowan kept going. Gentle? Yes, but she’d thrown me on the bed and squeezed harshly. He must’ve seen the expression on my face, because he laughed. A wicked laugh, before he climbed on the bed. His hand held my throat, squeezing ever so slightly - showing he could cut my air off if he wanted, without magic. He squeezed tighter, until I whimpered. His voice lowered, “I’ll ask you one more time. Are you sure you’re ready for this?” 

“Rowan, don’t scare her.” Aelin clicked her tongue, but her fingers pinched my nipple, through my top, and twisted - making me yelp and look at her. “Look at him.” She ordered, and I did. 

His eyes were intense. That green a promise of pain and pleasure. I felt captivated, mesmerized by him. “Are you sure?” He repeated himself, upset about having to - based on the small squeeze he gave my throat. 

“Yes. I’m sure.” I said, maybe a bit more confident as I feel. 

“Good.” He answered, my hand moving to scratch at my chest, a nervous habit. 

Rowan moves as soon as my hand shifts, one of his hands snatching both of mine and pulling them up, above my head, stretching out my body. “I believe she told you to keep them above your head, are you not capable of listening?” His voice is low, almost a growl, and he speaks right in my ears. Aelin, in the meantime, has straddled my lap, her fingers running up and down my sides, leaving goosebumps in their wake. 

“I’m sure it was an accident, wasn’t it petal?” Petal. The mating bond liked that, I could almost see another small golden thread stretching out and sparkling. My body arches into her, my hips undulating to try and get closer to her, to get some relief. I whine slightly when her hand presses my stomach down, pinning me to the bed. “Needy little thing, aren’t you?” She presses a kiss to the hollow of my collarbone, her teeth dragging over it, dragging down my body, right to the valley of my breasts, pulling my top down so she can access the skin. 

She looked up at me through her lashes the entire time and fuck that was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen. Rowan’s hand pulled my head towards him. It did two things, gave Aelin access to my neck, and let him crash his lips against mine. Aelin’s teeth dragged down the column of my neck, as Rowan’s lips consumed mine. His teeth tugged at my bottom lip, biting enough to draw blood, before his tongue ran over them, cleaning up. He licked across the seam of my lips, and I opened to let him in, tasting my blood on his tongue. A smaller, but still calloused hand tugged my head back, and they switched. 

I felt so, so close - and I was still fully dressed, still had all of my clothes on. 

-

I watched Aelin kissing Y/N, and was surprised I didn’t feel any jealousy. I hadn’t the last few days, or even since she came into our lives, but I still thought maybe part of me should feel that way. Aelin pulled up for air, her breathing heavier.

“Why do we still have clothes on?” Y/N demanded, wiggling slightly where my hand still gripped her wrists, and Aelin pinned her hips down. 

Aelin climbed off, and let me drag Y/N, so she sat on the edge of the bed, and I stood in between her legs. I slowly pulled her tunic off, marveling at every bare inch of skin revealed, my fingers tracing her skin as I went. Aelin’s hands undid her band, her breasts left bare. I sent a gentle icy wind to her, just enough to brush against her nipples. Aelin countered it with a gentle flame - not one to burn, just to send a gentle flicker of heat. She threw her head back and moaned. 

“So sensitive.” I tutted, and she tugged at my top, pulling it up over my head. Aelin, behind her, was already naked, and fisted her hair, twisting her head around to kiss her. I made quick work taking both of our pants off, and leaving the three of us naked. All exposed to each other. My hands gripped her sides, thumbs brushing over her breasts. A whimper, right into Aelin’s eager mouth. I’m going to enjoy seeing all of the sounds I can wring out of her. 

Once she was completely bare, I knelt in front of her - in between her legs, and spread her thighs, both of my hands pushing her legs as far apart as they could go. 

-

They each made me finish. Twice. Before Rowan even moved to enter me. They wouldn’t let me touch them, or please them either. Kept saying it’s about me, and that there would be plenty of time for that. Only after a whole lot of begging did Aelin let me taste her. 

“Please, Aelin.” I begged. I writhed under her fingers as she leant over me. 

“One more.” And she pinched my clit. Pinched it, and I came hard enough to see stars. 

She kept her word, and moved us so I could kneel between her legs, her back propped up on pillows. As it happened, she told me exactly what to do to make her feel good. And when words started to fail her, Rowan was there - whispering in my ear. A little harder, slide one finger in, curl. He knew exactly what to do, exactly how to make Aelin come undone - and I was eager to learn.

-

“Are you ready?” Aelin breathed, kissing my shoulder. Rowan didn’t speak, but his expression asked the same question. 

“Gods, yes!” I exclaimed. Rowan’s hand shot to my throat, not squeezing, but gripping lightly. 

“Watch your attitude,” He said, with a gleam I didn’t quite recognize. 

“Please fuck me.” I breathed, looking back and forth between both of them. Aelin knelt behind me, supporting me alternated between gentle and brutal kisses on my neck and shoulders. Rowan had been between my thighs, doing about the same. 

One finger shoved into me, knuckle deep. I whined at the sudden intrusion. “Breathe.” Aelin whispered in my ear. I listened, but my eyes didn’t leave Rowan, not as his finger slowly retreated, before pushing back in. He carefully watched every one of my reactions as he added another, and then a third, stretching me. Preparing me for him, I realized. I must’ve looked nervous as he lined up, because Aelin’s lips captured mine in a kiss, and I felt him slowly inch in. 

Gods it hurts. It fucking hurt. I whimpered, a slight tear dripping from the corner of my eye. Rowan’s thumb brushed it away. Green eyes met mine as he lifted it to his mouth, licking the tear off of his finger, and I could see him trembling with restraint, trying to be as gentle as possible. He’s holding himself back. Those strange Fae instincts didn’t like that. They, I, want my mates completely unleashed. All of him, and all of her. 

“Why are you holding back?” I demanded. 

-

“Why are you holding back?” My little defiant mate said right to Rowan, who’s eyes narrowed as he spoke to me, 

Should we? 

Yes. 

He pulled out, almost completely, before gripping her thighs tightly and slamming back into her. Her scream. Pain, one of pain. The pleasure hadn’t hit yet. 

“You can take it.” Rowan growled, his hand circling around her neck, as he pulled back out slowly, before thrusting in just as hard. 

Another whimper, her eyes widened as she met his. 

-

Aelin’s fingers prodded at my mouth, pushing inside. “Suck.” She ordered, and I did. Right as Rowan pushed back in again. I fought to swallow down that pain, to wait for the pleasure to kick in, but mother above I’d never been stretched so far. She pulled her fingers out, and went right for the apex of my thighs. 

“Aelin.” I moaned, as she hit that same sensitive, overstimulated area. Rowan moved faster, quicker, and I felt my magic tingle to the surface. “So good,” she purred in my ear, “you’re taking him so well petal.” 

Faster than I could process, Rowan had pulled out, and flipped me. He grasped around my waist, and pulled me so my back hit his chest, and my thighs spread across his knees. Without another word, he pushed me onto him. All the way down in one thrust. 

“Rowan.” His name came out as a mixture between a moan and a whimper. 

“Good girl,” His lips brushed over the shell of my ear. “Taking me so well.” A hand grasped my chin, and I felt Aelin’s fingers circling my clit, just as her lips crashed against mine. I was caged in between both of them, and it was pure ecstasy.  

-

He felt Y/N’s head dropping back against his shoulder, 

“Please,” She moaned, “please.” 

“Use your words,” he ordered. But such nice manners out of her. Maybe Aelin could learn something. 

“Please can I come?” She could barely get the words out, 

He pushed her forward so she’d brace her hands on Aelin’s shoulders, “come for us,” Aelin whispered in her ear, brushing hair out of her face. Y/N screamed his name, and Aelin’s, as they both worked together to bring her over the edge. 

-

I felt Rowan’s canines scraping one side of my neck, and Aelin’s on the other. How did they do it? I have no idea, but they both bit down, right as I reached the edge, and they sent me over. 

-

Without thinking too clearly about it, I finished inside of Y/N. Aelin didn’t notice immediately, her fire coming out to play with Y/n’s magic, swirling around together like two sides of a coin. The gentle soothing night, and raging flames. Icy wind mixed in with them, swirling together in harmony. 

I’ll get a rag. Or several. Keep her distracted. 

-

I kissed the crown of Y/N’s head, and then her forehead, and her cheeks, to the corner of her mouth, before placing a soft and gentle one on her lips. She let out a small noise of content, completely exhausted. I stroked her hair, murmuring sweet things to her as I held her in my arms. 

-

Safe, and content. That’s how I felt, wrapped in Aelin’s arms, her hands stroking my hair, lips kissing my skin. 

“I’m going to clean you up.” I heard Rowan say. “Then a bath.” 

I hummed my agreement, hoping he wouldn’t tell me to use my words right now because I wasn’t entirely certain I could. “Don’t look.” Aelin whispered as I opened my eyes, her fingers tilting my chin up to see her instead. I tried anyway, but her grip was unyielding. Right. Bleeding on my first time. She gave a soft grin as my eyes widened in understanding, and her canines nipped at my nose. I laughed, poking at her cheek in reply. Her hand snatched up and caught it, before she pressed a kiss to the tip. 

“Are you two done?” Rowan sounded amused. He ducked as both a small ball of fire shot right for his head, followed by a wave of night. “Bath.” He ordered, looking at me. 

“Do I smell?” I huffed, and started pushing myself up. 

“Like us.” I could hear Aelin’s wink, “but you’ll be sore, the bath might help with that,” she continued.

“Sore?” I questioned, but in the same moment I tried to stand, just to realize my legs were too shaky, and gave out under me. Rowan caught me with a laugh, like he’d been waiting for that to happen. Smug male pride spread across his face. “You’re insufferable.” I told him. Another grin. He knows, and doesn’t give a damn. 

“Let’s go.” Aelin said, and I yelped as she scooped me up, taking me right to their bathroom, before I could argue. 

“I can walk.” 

“And I can carry you.” She snarled back. Fussy. 

Let her fuss. Rowan’s voice popped into my mind, surprising me. Right, mating bond. I told you, she’s twice as bad as me. 

And he was right. Aelin climbed in the bath with me, gently washed every inch clean - even if she seemed a bit reluctant to do so. Her fingers dug into my skull, and I relaxed into her, my back leaning against her chest. I might have fallen asleep at some point. 

-

Aelin. He spoke to her, moving to get her attention. 

What. She snapped, focused on scrubbing the shampoo into Y/n’s hair. Like she’d been for the past five minutes. 

She fell asleep, love. 

Her hands paused, and she peered over to look at our mates face. Oh. Aelin spit off some orders of things for him to grab, and gently woke Y/n back up, finally finishing the longest damn bath he’d ever seen. Aelin can call him a fussy buzzard all she likes, but at the end of the day she’s twice as bad. Maybe even worse with their mate than with him. He doesn’t mind her … fussiness … but he also wouldn’t mind if someone else got to bear the brunt of it for a while. 

[ju-vondy]

The text I wish I could draw to every Elriel shipper:

What Azriel feels about Elain is lust. The need to fill a void and nothing more. He's desperate because his loved so-called brothers found their mates who ironically were sisters but the third sister wasn't give to him. But what we do know is that Azriel WANTS a mate: this has already become clear at several points in the narrative of the books.

The mating bond is SO much deeper than lust. It's so BEYOND. Azriel will never feel a mating bond snapping with Elain, and guess why? Because she ALREADY HAS A BOND WITH ANOTHER FUCKING MALE. That is true: everyone can smell it, even Azriel can.

So, let Azriel kiss and f*ck with Elain how many time he wants... That will NEVER be a mating bond (that he desperately wants) at the end of the day. That will never be the connection he wants. And I wouldn't bother to see a scene of them going to bed together: I've seen Feyre having s*x with Tamlin, Aelin with Chaol, etc. etc. But did that EVER influenced the end? No. Once them found their partners the past didn't mattered anymore, for God's sake!!

And SJM has already made it clear that when she thinks about "pairing mates together" she always looks for who has the most things in common and also the two people must have a dynamic where one CHALLENGES the other. Like that dog and cat dynamic. Sarah loves writing "bunters."

Do you really think Elain will challenge Azriel, seriously? HOW?! She doesn't fight. She hates violence. She has zero personality. She has no interest in training (seriously, she could have literally shown up at the House to visit Nesta and signed up to participate in the training... But she didn't, clearly because taking care of the garden is more interesting than learning to defend herself, right? LOL). Elain likes SUNSHINE, flowers, baking, gardening, delicate things. Azriel has NOTHING to do with that.

Now: Gwyn is one of those hyperactive people, with orange cat energy. She is the total opposite of Azriel when it comes to communication hahaha and that would be REALLY COOL to see. She being plugged in at 220W and he getting lost thinking "Damn, how can this beautiful thing talk so much?" 😄👐🏻 Gwyn, with this personality, would simply take Azriel out of his comfort zone. Isn't that what SJM likes, after all??! People who challenge each other.

Not to mention Gwyn has a very good sense of humor. That day of the Solstice, Azriel could have simply been rude to her, but he decided to stay and start a conversation with her, joking: "Are you kicking me out?" And soon after, when Azriel said that he had forgotten his dagger and couldn't sleep without it, Gwyn didn't think twice before joking "Ah yes, a comfort for every growing child" and Azriel laughed. Gwyn has a sharp tongue and it would be lovely seeing Azriel losing his mind to it.

Gwyn, like Azriel, is interested in combat. She became the first Valkyrie after hundreds of years (Azriel himself looked at her with admiration when she was about to cut the ribbon) Gwyn likes to sing, Azriel too. She was PISSED when Azriel sneered saying that they wouldn't be able to overcome the obstacles and therefore hadn't thought of a prize for them. Gwyn is competitive and we know that Azriel is too, as Cassian and Rhysand have never managed to defeat him in snowball fights in all these years. Azriel is a master spy, Gwyn spent literally hours sitting up in the trees spying on opponents and monsters when she was in the Rite.

That's and we're the reason why after reading ACOSF I stopped thinking about being Elriel and I'm rooting for the little redhead to be the boy Az's endgame.

She's so much more compatible with him! I liked the idea of Elriel because he had that "forbidden thing" going on and all, but honestly? It would be too cruel to Lucien. And Azriel is too loyal to Rhysand to disobey his orders. Azriel himself said that he didn't go that far with his plans, the only thing he thought about was bitching.

In other words: Az only thinks of Elain as a source of pleasure. But a partnership bond is not that. A bond of partnership is someone who challenges you, complements you and supports you. That's what I want for Az: someone he looks at and admires for who she is, and not just because he feels horny and wants to see how the female will react when he's inside her 🙄😮‍💨

Another thing: I don't want to see him getting some female whose his shadows DISAPPEAR when she is around. That would be too boring! Literally, the bonus chapter already gave us everything: on one page we see the shadows shrinking through Elain's breath and minutes later one of those same shadows intertwines with Gwyn's condensed breathing. And it wasn't just Azriel who calmed down after that conversation, it was the shadows too.

I'm not here saying that Azriel ALREADY DIES IN LOVE with Gwyn, for God's sake! How do you have selective interpretation, right, sweet Elriels?! Guys, Gwyn just appeared in the story (and has already attracted more attention than the plant in 4 books LOL, cry less!) And it's clear that she still has so much to develop! The whole thing just started, you know?

Sarah said she's leaving "crumbs" and "clues" along the way, and clearly the vocabulary says it all. What examples of hints can we notice? The "spark" Azriel felt in his chest and the image glowing quietly even if he buried it down deep. Sarah at one point in the narrative emphasized that Gwyn was "willing to erase Azriel and Cassian's arrogant smiles. Especially Azriel's." Why not let the narration die there in the penultimate sentence? Why did Sarah add *especially Azriel's*? Look at the DYNAMICS there my people 🗣️🗣️🗣️🤏🏻

Also, when Nesta hear Gwyn's singing she describes as if Gwyn's voice was claiming to be freed, to let go! As if there's something inside Gwyn that need to be developed. And Sarah has never been one to leave things loose. Anyway, let's see what fate awaits us!

[mariaofdoranelle]

Look at Us Now - Ch. 11

Fic masterlist

This week I had to reassure two different friends about a Rowaelin HEA for this fic, can you believe this? It’s like you guys don’t trust my fluff-loving side at all lmaoo

Warnings: language, drunk idiots

Word count: 4,4k

As a soon-to-be mother, Aelin was so proud of her baby girl for growing so much.

As an orthopedist, she was mourning the perfect posture she used to have.

Fenrys stopped at the kitchen’s doorstep to stare at her. “What the hell are you doing?”

“I’m trying to save my lombardic curve. Stop being weird about it.”

He shrugged and sat on the nearest couch as Aelin tried to adjust that arched back of hers. Holy rutting Mala, why did pregnancy make her go through all that?

“Is Dorian coming tonight?”

“Probably. If he feels like it.” Fenrys shrugged. “It’s not that serious.”

Aelin crossed her arms, clamping her lips together as she tried to look serious. “You’re just casually seeing each other every day?”

“Exactly.” He turned on the TV. “Just like you and Rowan are platonically living together and having a baby.”

She gaped, but still sat by his side. “Take it back!”

“Absolutely not! Do you think Rowan just…” Fenrys flailed his arms around, looking for an example. “He doesn’t goes around massaging everyone’s feet, Aelin. I’m pretty sure you’re the only person he does that for.”

She crossed her arms, chin up. “He does it for me, but not because of me. I just happen to be carrying his baby.”

“The baby is inside the belly, not the feet.”

She sighed, forcing her voice into a lower, calmer tone. “Look, you weren’t there, but he clearly wasn’t interested. He only changed because of the baby. And I’m not complaining about it, I had fun, I’m just saying that if he wanted non-platonic stuff with me, he would tell me.”

Fenrys looked her dead in the eye. “You had a boyfriend.”

“And that never stopped him from fucking me senseless. Wouldn’t stop him from seeing me outside the base if he wanted to.”

It was true, and it was also killing her. Every time Rowan ran to a store to buy something she was craving or massaged her swollen feet, Aelin had the painful reminder that, when it was just her, all she got was cock and a couch inside his office. Rowan just learned very early on that happy mom means happy baby, and she was trying to be okay with it.

They were just having casual sex at first, and now he seemed okay with keeping things platonic for their kid. There was no use in reading between the lines.

After that, Aelin decided to go find Rowan at her house. Fenrys was nice enough to be silent when Dorian was there, but his bed still got squeaky sometimes.

She hired a company to paint her house, since she couldn’t smell paint because of the baby, nor could she let Rowan paint the entire four-bedroom house the Air Force provided her. He protested her decision, but he was already doing too much for her.

Aelin had a feeling that, if she asked him to build a house from scratch for this baby, he’d do it alone without thinking twice.

She had already grown familiar with the path between her house and Rowan’s. The sound of the leaves when the wind got a little stronger never failed to soothe her, and Aelin was excited to co-parent a kid with such close proximity.

Which could be even closer, if her new idea worked out.

When Aelin stepped into her house, the first thing she noticed was the faint sound of Syd Barrett spilling his guts, and she looked for the source until she found Rowan lying on the nursery’s floor.

He didn’t seem surprised when she walked in, though. He probably listened to her footsteps all the way to the baby’s room.

“I didn’t know you were into junkies from the 60’s.”

Rowan got up to get another pillow and help ease her onto the floor. “You listen to them all the time.”

Aelin closed her eyes, feeling the muscles on her back relax now that she was lying too. “My parents were fans.”

Rowan’s hand found her scalp, and Aelin almost purred. God, she was too weak for those.

“You think about them a lot?” He asked.

“More often now that I’m pregnant. And with insomnia.”

Pregnancy just made her think of them more often now, but it wasn’t the crushing type of grief she felt during her late childhood and early teen years. It was bittersweet.

Rowan hummed, never ceasing to caress her hair. “Did you try eating an apple before bed? It helps to induce sleep.”

“No, I haven’t.” Aelin hid her face on his side, trying her best not to laugh.

Apples before bed did absolutely nothing for people with sleep disorders. Rowan didn’t know that her pregnancy was just making a deeper problem worse, though. Aelin couldn’t take any kind of sleeping pills with a baby on the way, and telling him this problem with no solution was just going to make the Buzzard worry to death.

Aelin had been off her antidepressants for almost two years, so this new development made her ghost her psychiatrist and decide to go back once she stopped breastfeeding. She had plenty of time to tell Rowan about that.

Aelin closed her eyes and grinned. “This song is so silly. I love how he laughs halfway into it.”

It was a good song, but he just repeated the name Maisie over and over most of the time.

“It isn’t silly,” Rowan protested. “He’s stoned out of his mind, and the only thing he feels like doing is repeating that girl’s name over and over. It’s kinda relatable”

“Rowan Whitethorn.” Her voice was low as she looked at him with widened, surprised eyes. “Are you coming out as a stoner?”

Chuckling, he playfully pinched her upper arm and turned sideways to face her while lying. “The name is really cute.”

“Maisie?”

“Yeah.”

She chewed her bottom lip, thinking this over. The name was adorable. “But we’re not naming our daughter after a junkie’s song, right?”

“No.” He shook his head, as if erasing the idea. “Of course not.”

They just stayed there, letting the album play as Aelin took in the baby’s room. It was so cute she felt like her chest could burst any minute.

She made Rowan and Aedion put a baby blue wallpaper, even if the Air Force’s regiment said every wall should be plain white. The furniture was in white wood, except for the little dresser in the corner.

It was wooden as well, but every drawer was a different shade of blue, getting darker at the bottom. The knobs were sea life themed, and it took Aelin a lifetime to decide which animal went with what drawer.

It was the cutest, babiest little thing. She woke Rowan up at 1 am to show this finding when she saw it online. It was her favorite part of the nursery.

Aelin felt her heart bang again when she met Rowan’s deep, inquisitive eyes.

“What’s on your mind?”

She placed her pillow closer to Rowan and hugged him. “Thank you.”

He had been pulling Aelin’s house together day and night, completely ignoring her protests about not letting her do much.

Rowan didn’t say anything, just caressed her head in that way that made her melt.

“I’ve been thinking about something,” she continued.

He hummed.

“Your house doesn’t have much of the baby vibe. With the parade of one-night stands and all.”

Rowan sighed. “I know I need to have this talk with—“

She shushed him. The house was Fenrys’ as well, and she didn’t want a surprise baby to disrupt his lifestyle.

“I thought of something. It’s not a permanent solution, but I won’t put an expiration date on it either.”

Rowan leaned closer, watching her intently.

“When I move into this house, you could come with me—“

He engulfed her in a hug, burying his face in the crook of her neck. “Yes.”

“You can pick any room you’d—“

“Yes.”

“So neither of us will be alone with a newborn—“

“Yes.”

Aelin laughed, feeling her chest tremble against his own. Alright, he didn’t need a lot of explanations. She got that.

They just stared at each other for a moment. Aelin felt her heart knock on her throat and do fuzzy little flips as she watched how Rowan’s smile made his eyes light up.

For the first time, she could put a name on the jolt of electricity he made her feel.

She was falling, and bracing herself for the bone crush.

~~

It was funny how everyone from this soccer moms’ night out was telling her to stop being shy and sing with Lysandra. Aelin wasn’t a shy person at all, she was just someone who knew her strengths. Singing wasn’t one of them.

There was no amount of fancy drinks that could make her go up on that stage, but now that Lys made the crowd ask no nicely…

Dorian was trying to save Aedion’s love life in a bar two blocks away. If this became a huge embarrassment, she could just leave, pretend this never happened and join them there. Aelin got up and took the second mic, not missing the cheery crowd—and especially her table—stirring things up.

“What are you two singing?” The employee with the computer asked.

“Lana?” Aelin suggested, but her friend had a vacant stare on the crowd.

She poked Lys on the ribs. “What are we singing?”

“Oh.” She jerked Aelin’s way, blinking, but then her disoriented face turned into a roguish grin. “Peppers.”

Not a question, but Lys and the employee still sought Aelin’s confirmation before starting.

Aelin was just singing at first. She wasn’t stiff, but there was nothing much to her moves. However, when the pre-chorus was reaching its end, Lysandra placed one hand on hand on Aelin’s hips in an attempt to loosen it, and that’s when she understood.

Lys didn’t want to sing a song. She wanted them to give a full show. And now that Aelin understood, she wouldn’t settle for less.

She was rolling her hips, swaying her whole body and toying with her hair as the lyrics suggested. Aelin had no idea if the tables were stirring them in because they were actually good or just two excited drunks, but she was eating it up.

“Put your hands on my knees, baby!” Someone screamed, referencing the song lyric.

Aelin had a snarky remark ready, but kept to herself when she realized it came from a woman, not a creepy dude. Instead, she swayed her hips harder and went down so she could put her hands on her knees in a little provocative manner. The lesbian roared, making her cackle mid-chorus.

And you know what? Tonight was about girls. Aelin came with her soccer mom friends to talk about girl things and sip girly drinks. If she was doing sexy dances tonight, it was for the lesbians. And bisexual girls. Non-binary too—

Lys tapped her shoulder when she stopped singing, too distracted counting all the letters from the acronym to check if she wasn’t forgetting anything. Fuck. She blamed it on the tequila.

Aelin smiled at the crowd when the song ended, taking the applause and fame in. Maybe she should quit orthopedics to perform for a living. Maybe that was her true calling.

All of those thoughts came to a halt when she paused to carefully study the room, though. Her heart stopped just to go back at the highest speed.

Rowan. By the side of a hot redhead.

He was staring at her, and there was no way to decipher that intense look in his eyes. His lips were pursed, but even if Rowan looked pissed, he never took his eyes off her. Not while she was on stage, not when Lys dragged her by the arm to the ladies’ room.

The redhead was looking between them the whole time, probably figuring something out already.

Aelin didn’t do anything when she got to the bathroom, though. Just stood there, staring at a blank spot in the wall. She was so shocked she barely noticed the distinctive reek of a bar’s bathroom. Lys was watching her the whole time, forehead wrinkled and hands on her hips.

This silence was too much, especially since Lys knew most of whatever went down with Rowan.

Well, that didn’t matter now. If the last weeks gave her any doubt about how she should proceed now that they were in a better situation, this just gave her rational side more certainty. He had moved on already, and so should she.

Aelin decided to reapply her lipstick just to do something with her hands.

“I’m assuming you saw Rowan with that woman.”

Yes, and not with any woman. It was the kind of woman who made single moms question their sexuality.

“A redhead?” Aelin’s voice came out slightly high-pitched as she stopped reapplying her lipstick to protest, searching for Lys’ concerned gaze through the bathroom mirror. “I thought he liked blondes. When did blondes stop being the hottest option?”

“You’d still be hotter than her if she were blonde. Or if you were a redhead.”

“This is not about me.” Aelin closed her lipstick, rolling her eyes. “I’m talking about men’s choices in general. It’s an anthropological observation.”

Lies, lies, lies. But Aelin didn’t even tell her therapist about old feelings resurfacing, she wasn’t about to pour her heart out to her newest friend while drunk at a club. Especially not while Rowan was having a hot date.

She raised her eyebrows, looking as if she was tired of explaining something obvious. “Even though he was ogling you like a dog staring at meat through a butcher’s shop window?”

Aelin put away her lipstick and gave Lys a pointed look. “He was not.”

“I was there. I remember it all too well.”

Aelin’s eyes widened. “We could sing that.”

“We can, because you’re not crashing Rowan’s date tonight.”

Aelin was carefully silent. She’d be lying if she said that idea didn’t cross her mind.

“You’re not.” Lysandra’s tone was firm, and she placed both hands on her friend’s shoulders. “You’re going to repeat after me: I’m Aelin Galathynius.”

Aelin giggled. “You’re not Aelin Galathynius.”

Lys squeezed her friend’s shoulders harder than necessary. “Say it.”

She straightened her posture. “I’m Aelin Galathynius.”

“And I’m too mature to crash Rowan’s date.”

“And I’m too mature to crash Rowan’s date,” she lied.

“Great.” Lys took a deep breath and pointed to the door. “Let’s get back to our table.”

Aelin went from the restroom’s door straight to Rowan.

“Good to see you got out of your house for once.”

Rowan slowly assessed her outfit with that judgy gaze of his, making her skin burn. ”Good to see you singing something that isn’t a nursery rhyme.”

Aelin crossed her arms. “I thought you were seeing a guy tonight.”

Rowan mirrored her expression. “So did I.”

Wait, he thought who would be seeing a guy?

His date extended a hand. “Hi. I’m Ansel.”

She begrudgingly shook it. “Aelin.”

God, this was awkward. She should’ve listened to Lysandra and stayed at her table. But when she saw Rowan there on a date with this gorgeous homewrecker with incredibly shiny hair… Aelin felt like she was burning from the inside out, and not in a good way.

Something about her face must’ve showed, because Ansel pointed between her and Rowan and said, “This is totally platonic. Fenrys thought Rowan could have a night out, so he stayed with the kid and set this up.”

“This is…” Rowan tilted his head, frowning at the redhead. “Exactly and not exactly what happened at the same time.”

Ansel elbowed him, making him straighten his posture.

“This is exactly what happened,” Rowan amended.

“Rowan?” Ansel put a hand on his shoulder to grab his attention, and Aelin almost singed it off with her eyes. “Can we talk for a second?”

They excused themselves and got just far enough so they’d be out of earshot. It looked like they we bickering. Ansel pointed at Aelin with her head. Rowan’s body stiffened. She pointed at the door. He pulled at his shirt cuffs and nodded. Aelin would kill to hear whatever that exchange was, especially because when Rowan approached her, Ansel was… smirking? As weird at this sounds, it looked a lot like a smirk.

“Hey.” Rowan didn’t sit again, just got close enough so she’d hear him over the terrible performance of an 80’s song. “I’m going to call an uber. Can you stay here?”

Aelin felt her heart sink. “You’re leaving with her?”

“What? No!” His eyebrows shot up as if the idea was absurd. “I’m calling Ansel’s uber. I was asking if you can wait for me here. Or at the tables outside, anywhere but the club part.”

Aelin nodded, chuckling. The loud, buzzing dance floor by the entrance must’ve been a terrifying sight for Rowan.

She found the soccer moms and quickly explained she’d be with Rowan in the other room. They seemed to understand the situation, which was good. Aelin was friendly with everyone there, but the only person she was close with was Lys. That one would be blasting their DM tomorrow morning, there was no doubt.

Rowan came back just a few minutes after she found them a table at a calmer area outside.

The breeze hitting her shoulders was gentle, but still stronger than her thin, backless shirt. Still, Aelin held her head high, refusing to feel bad for crashing and ruining his date.

“How many beers did you pay her?”

Rowan leaned back on his chair, a playful glint in his eye. “Three, why?”

“You’re paying me four.” He opened his mouth, but she raised a finger and beat him to it. “No questions asked.”

Rowan chugged his beer after their first round came. “I don’t know why you’re being like this. Aren’t you dating other people too?”

“What?” Aelin slightly shook her head, mouth ajar. “Where is this coming from?”

He tilted his head. “You were very clear about wanting more kids.”

“And then you made an assumption about my dating life.”

Rowan didn’t answer, unwavering.

Aelin held a finger up. “First, I told you I haven’t figured that out yet.” Another finger up. “Second, I wasn’t in a relationship the first time, I don’t need one to have kids again.” She shrugged. “For all you know, I could be talking about adoption or fertilization.”

Rowan had his arms crossed, eyes squinted at her. “Why would you pay to have kids if we did that for free the last time?”

The mix of what he’d just said and his displeased face made her cackle. Hard. Her head was tilted back, her body trembling as she tried to regain composure and feel less breathless.

“Why is this funny?” He protested, trying and failing to hide a silly smile. “I’m just saying that if you don’t have another person you’d like to… share genes with, the reasonable thing to do would be make the other children genetically compatible with Maisie.” He sipped his beer, looking nonchalant. “In case one of them needs a kidney or a bone marrow transplant.”

“Alright.” She chugged the rest of her beer down. “Let’s suppose I decide to do that. Would you donate your sperm and sign off parental rights?”

“Absolutely not!” He blurted, clutching his beer for dear life as if it’d protect his imaginary kids from Aelin’s modern ideas. “I’d make and raise them the old-fashioned way.”

Aelin leaned towards Rowan, her pulse skyrocketing as her breath fanned against the shell of his ear. “I bet you’d love that, wouldn’t you?”

There was no mistaking the way he trembled under her whisper. Rowan found the exposed curve of her waist with his hands like a magnet, the tips of his fingers pressing against her skin.

Rowan’s pupils were dilated, his forest-green irises looked on fire. “Stop teasing me. We’re drunk.”

Aelin leaned back on her seat and sipped her drink, chest filled with satisfaction even after being rejected. It was really hard to feel defeated now, since Rowan was too intoxicated to take his eyes off her golden top.

“You were a lot more fun six years ago.”

Rowan chuckled and finished his bottle. “Next round?”

Aelin confirmed at the same time her phone started ringing.

“Dor? Is everything okay—“

“I can’t stand your cousin anymore, Aelin! I’m dumping him in the sewers!”

She chuckled, not missing Rowan’s curious gaze. “Did Aed drink too much?”

“That too! He went straight to a woman and slurred: ‘you’re the prettiest girl I’ve seen this week.’ I can’t do this, Aelin. He’s unsalvageable.”

Aelin snorted. “Alright, give me five minutes and I’ll text you.”

“Too long!”

She finished the call before Dorian could protest further. Rowan had his head tilted, waiting for an explanation.

“Dorian’s bored, so he decided to be Aedion’s wingman tonight. They’re at a bar close by, so we agreed to uber back together.”

“Uber together where? Dorian lives in the opposite side of town.”

She shrugged. “Who knows? You know how Dorian is.”

That explanation seemed enough for Rowan. It didn’t take long for them to decide it was way past their bedtime already, so they decided to head out as well.

They needed to have their wristbands scanned at the cashier near the exit, and she took a step back when Rowan mentioned for her arm as well.

Aelin shook her head. “I spent a small fortune in frilly cocktails.”

He didn’t say a thing, just gently took her wrist and showed it to the cashier.

The outside of the club looked the same it did hours ago, except the line to enter was longer, making the street too loud for it to be the middle of the night.

“Heeeey.” Aelin made a twist to look him in the eye, but stumbled on her heels. Rowan tried to catch her from falling, but she beat him to it. She was just that kind of independent drunk. “Your mom invited me to your trip with Maisie the last time she was in town.”

Rowan snorted. “Sounds like her.”

Every year, Rowan and Maisie visited the southeastern beach house his parents retired in. Inviting Aelin to her ex’s trip without letting him know was something only Rory Whitethorn could pull off. She was a… peculiar person, to say the least. Aelin loved her to death.

“What did you tell her?” He asked.

Aelin tried to look nonchalant, thankful he couldn’t tell the tingling in her limbs. “What was I supposed to tell her? I already crashed your date, I won’t crash your trip too.”

To be fair, Aelin didn’t say anything because she would not, under any circumstance, invite herself to Rowan’s trip. And by under any circumstance, she meant only if she was drunk.

He shrugged. “Maisie would love it if you went.”

She gave him a pointed look. “Of course Maisie would want me to go. I’m talking about you. Would you feel comfortable with me there?”

Rowan’s shoulders dropped, and something in his eyes melted. “Of course I would. Do you want to come with me next month?”

Aelin flipped her hair, not looking him in the eye. “Well, since you asked so nicely.”

He snorted and placed a hand on the back of her shoulder, gently stroking that patch of skin with his thumb until their uber arrived.

Rowan opened the backseat door for her, but a very drunk Aedion called his name from the inside.

She leaned closer to Rowan and whispered, “I think he wants you to go in the middle.”

He sighed, but complied.

The moment they got inside and closed the door, Aedion laid down on the backseat, resting his head on Rowan’s lap and hugging his middle. “I love you, man.”

Rowan petted his head the same way he’d do to a dog. “You’re okay.”

“Aw,” Dorian cooed from the passenger seat. “He got so happy when he saw you outside.”

“Are you staying with Aedion?” Rowan asked, since the driver was getting them farther from Dorian’s apartment each minute.

“No, I’m staying with you. You stole my boyfriend, remember?”

Rowan’s face was flat when he replied, “Thanks for letting me know.”

Grinning at the bickering, Aelin rested her head on Rowan’s shoulders and nearly purred when his hand met her scalp. He chuckled. She lightly elbowed his ribs.

“You know damn well I’m weak for those,” she mumbled, eyes blissfully closed.

“I do.”

Aelin almost fell asleep right there, all because of Rowan’s skilled hands. She would’ve, if it wasn’t for the seat bumping as the driver sped, and the annoying air freshener in the car.

When they arrived, Rowan decided to drop Aelin off while Dorian did the same to a nearly dead drunk Aedion, and they’d meet later. Or Dorian could just break into the house through Fenrys’ window like he used to, that part wasn’t clear.

“There’s this thing nagging me,” Rowan said as they walked through her front garden.

“Spill.”

“Dorian seemed to know you were with the soccer moms all the time, but Fenrys seemed so clueless about this earlier today.”

“Oh.” Aelin leaned against a pillar, scrambling for a nice way to explain this. “Dorian doesn’t tell much about me to Fenrys, since it’d be the same as telling you. I never asked him to do this, but he’s just that loyal.”

Rowan’s expression seemed downcast for a beat, then he concealed it with a grin. “Keeping secrets, Lieutenant?”

Aelin crouched to get the keys from under the front mat, trying to downplay how much that harmless question made her heart twist. Something about her demeanor must’ve given it away, since he changed the subject.

“You know it’s not safe to leave your keys there, right? Why didn’t you take them with you?”

Aelin got up again and sighed, already knowing it was too much for his male brain to understand. “My purse is small, and the keys would scratch my lipstick tube.”

Rowan shook his head, but a small smile betrayed his disapproving face. “So between your lipstick and your house keys, you’d rather keep the lipstick?”

“Absolutely. I need to keep my priorities straight.”

He chuckled, eyes soft as their corners crinkled. “Good night, Aelin.”

Rowan held her upper arm for a beat, caressing it with his thumb, and then let her go.

This chapter has a bonus scene

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[starfall-spirit]

One Condition

Most Romance Week Prompts will be attached to a romantic song.

Day 1: Brad Paisley’s We Danced

SJMRW Prompt: Meet Cute

Ship: Aedion x Lysandra

Summary: Modern AU where Lysandra leaves her purse behind on girls’ night out. The cute bartender gives it back at the price of a dance after last call.

Short and sweet.

Lysandra

I cursed as I reached for my clutch on the center console and met air. “What is it?” Aelin slurred from the passenger seat of her own car. Despite my offer to drive her home from girls’ night out, Rowan—ever the doting husband—came to pick her up himself. Newlyweds were something else.

“I left my purse inside somewhere. Who knows who snatched it up by now. My credit card, my ID—”

“Just go back inside. Look, you know I picked this bar because my cousin’s an employee. The over protective pain was watching us all night. If you left your bag, there’s just as good a chance he grabbed it and missed us leaving as some stranger picking it up.”

He was the bartender. The hot bartender dropping bad pick up lines when I went up for my one and only drink as a lightweight driving myself home. I groaned. I hadn’t seen him since Aelin and Rowan’s wedding where we hadn’t spoken a word, but he was certainly acting familiar tonight. “Alright. I’ll go check.”

Slipping back into the empty bar, I found the blond wiping down the counter. “Looking for your clutch?”

“Aelin said you probably picked it up,” I said, hope rising.

He nodded, dropping his stained rag on the bar top. “Rowan asked me to keep an eye on you girls.” He chuckled. “Aelin calls me over protective. Let’s just wait till she finds out her husband’s the one hounding me about watching you two.”

I smirked, sure my friend had a good enough idea about her husband’s interventions. “I guess we should thank the both of you for keeping us from becoming a Friday night bar horror story. That’s it,” I confirmed as he raised my black clutch from a shelf behind the bar.

He drew his hand back before I could take the purse from him. “You’ll get this back on one condition, Miss Lysandra.”

I crossed my arms, already irked by his little game. “That being?”

“Dance with me.” I snorted. “Come on. One dance right out here on the floor. No one’s watching.”

“I—” He raised his brows. “Fine.”

Stepping around the high counter, he turned a cheesy slow dance on his phone, sweeping me into his arms.

Taking a step, he led the first pattern. Oh, the man was smooth.

Here I had expected awkward out-of-time steps and stiff turns, but this man could dance. He gave a full laugh, easily reading my surprise. “So little faith, Lysandra. Why? I am the prima donna’s cousin. Shouldn’t I have maintained a skill or two we learned in our childhood?”

“I didn’t see you dance once at the wedding. I made my own assumptions, I suppose.”

He spun me under his arm—once, twice, drawing me in closer as we resumed our original stance. “Maybe I was waiting on the right partner.”

I met his eyes, surprised at what I found there. He held me like a gentleman, leaving space between our bodies, but the heat in his eyes promised something else, dare I welcome it.

“Are all of you Ashryvers such smooth-talkers?”

He grinned, leaning down as the song faded to its outro. “That depends. Is it working?”

~~~~~

Aelin

“So, did he have it?” I asked, waving a magazine over my freshly painted toes.

“Yes. Thankfully,” Lysandra said. “Replacing that stuff would have been a pain.” I grinned, glad we were speaking over the phone. How Lysandra hadn’t put together my history of pick-pocketing and my cousin finding her purse, I didn’t know. “Aelin, would it be weird if he and I went out? Like to dinner.”

My grin widened. “Lysandra, I think that’s a brilliant idea.”

~~~~~

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[emilyoftheshadows]

Deja Vu

Hi! so this is a one-shot based off of olivia rodrigo's new song deja vu. It took a little longer than I thought to write, but here it is in all its questionable glory. Of course it is rowaelin because what else endgame couple would I write lol. Anyways, I hope you guys enjoy!

wordcount// 1838

*****

Aelin felt sick to her stomach as she stared at her phone. The bright screen illuminated the disarray she had created around her. The bed covers were thrown recklessly around Aelin’s mattress, a package of half eaten oreos shoved between the twisted sheets. Bottles of alcohol were towered on the floor and nightstand, creating a maze that she had to maneuver around every time she left the softness of her bed. Tears stained Aelin 's cheeks, the sadness inside of her spilling out everytime she even thought of him. How his touch felt on her skin or how his lips used to kiss her forehead in comfort.

But all of that was over for her. Because he didn’t need her. Her love and her own problems only held him back, and Aelin knew it. She was a stain in Rowan’s perfect new life, and she would die before she let herself be the reason for any sadness he experienced.

So here she was, 6 months and 9 days after she had broken up with him. His face had been scrunched up in confusion, his emerald eyes glistening with tears as she had said her goodbyes. Aelin knew the breakup had hit him hard, but she consoled herself with the thought that once he got over their relationship, he would be free to live his dreams. Aelin would no longer be the unnecessary tether holding him back from his full potential.

Rowan had moved soon after the couple had ended university, taking a high end job at Maeve’s Publishing Co. in Doranelle. He had met his people, The Cadre as they were known to the locals. Working with his new team, Rowan had formed an unbreakable bond with the men he spent so much of his time with. As much as Rowan had found his new home in Doranelle, the opposite could be said for Aelin.

She had opted to stay in Rifthold, accepting her own high end job at Hamel Hotels working as their Brand Manager. At first, the glitz of the hotels and fast paced life had been exhilarating. That was until she had learned her boss was a demanding misogynist and occupied her time with insane projects and endless demands.

Her sour demeanor matched Rowan's exuberance head for head, and every visit she could see the concern etched in that beautiful face deepen with time. But when she went to visit Rowan in Doranelle, all Aelin saw was a makeshift family that he would have forever. The Cadre was working their way up in the publishing world, becoming an unstoppable force and you could practically feel the excitement buzzing throughout Rowan.

It was then when he was surrounded by his men eager for their future, that Aelin knew that she was a distraction. A miserable self loathing girlfriend who was holding him back from immersing himself into this new opportunity. So she took herself out of the picture, doing whatever was necessary to make sure he moved on from her.

She stopped answering his texts, let his endless calls go to voicemail, and unfollowed him on every social media site she had. After the third month, he finally stopped calling her everyday. The month after that, he stopped texting her. Although Aelin wanted this, she couldn’t help but be sad when she stopped getting his streams of i miss yous and hearts.

Aelin had gotten herself a dog after the breakup, focusing all her misguided love and intentions into the white beast that ate all her shoes and furniture. Using his pictures, she made an account for him and used this new anonymous account to stalk Rowan and his Cadre, plus the girl that used to occasionally join the men on their outings. Lyria was Maeve’s assistant and had been through just as much hell as they did, dealing with their bosses' incessant needs. Because of this, the crew often invited her out to the bars as a way to unwind from long days of work, sharing funny mishaps and complaining about Maeve together.

She told herself it was just to check up on him, to make sure he was okay, but she knew deep down that she could never fully separate herself from Rowan. This account was her only link to him, and as shady as it was, Aelin would be damned before she ever gave up the chance to get a glimpse into his life.

But as she focused on her phone, all previous thoughts for Rowan’s wellbeing flew out of her head. Because on Fleetfoot’s instagram feed, Lyria had posted a picture. The scene was innocent enough to any other person looking at it. She sat outside, the sun filtering in through the trees in the background of the photo. On the small table in front of her sat one cup of strawberry ice cream, a spoon poking out of the top of the scoop creating the picture perfect image. Her delicate hand with its perfectly manicured fingers grasped a tan hand almost twice the size of hers, emphasizing her petite features.

But that hand is what stopped Aelin in her tracks. Because as she looked at the post again, that hand led her to the face she adored most in the world. All too fast, she was consumed by his emerald green eyes, a hint of mischief shining in their center. His silver hair reflected the light around him, giving Rowan an ethereal glow as he posed for the camera. Other than slight dark circles under his eyes, he looked perfectly content. A soft smile graced his features and his clothes showed no clear stains or rumpled appearance.

Rowan was okay. He was absolutely fine. And Aelin was not.

Because whether he realized it or not, Rowan had recreated their own first date. As awkward college freshmen, the couple had gone to a family owned ice cream shop run by a friendly old man Emrys. They would return to that ice cream shop at least once a week after that first date, getting to know the owner and his partner Malaki. They had gotten strawberry ice cream, and Rowan had only asked for one spoon, insisting that he could just feed her himself whenever she wanted a bite. The buzzard didn’t even like sweets as much as she did, only wanting to make her suffer. They had sat on a bench outside the restaurant, laughing at how silly they both were and enjoying their newfound relationship. That memory used to always bring a smile to Aelin’s face, causing nostalgia for a simpler time in their lives. Looking at this recreation on her phone though, all Aelin wanted to do was scream in his face for how careless he was with their past.

That moment should belong to them, and them only. Her vision became blurred with tears, the image of his face distorting in front of her. All she could feel was a pit opening up inside her, clawing its way through her body until all she felt was numb. Her tears stopped running down her face, her hands stopped shaking, and she could finally breathe again. But Aelin no longer felt heartbroken for the bird boy who had made her dreams come true. No, all she felt was curiosity. A curiosity for whether or not he got deja vu when he was with her.

---

Rowan sat on his couch, staring at the photo in front of him. He had gotten back from his date with Lyria a couple of hours ago, guilt crashing over him every time he looked at her. Because Lyria wasn’t the woman that made his heart soar or his bones ache when he wasn’t near her. No, that feeling only belonged to his fireheart. The woman who could apparently no longer stand his presence in her life.

Aelin had broken up with him abruptly, pushing him away when he knew she needed him the most. Rowan wasn’t blind, he could see how unhappy she was in Rifthold. Arobynn Hamel was a pervert at best and Aelin deserved to have something or someone good in her life. And he thought he could be that someone, he really did. Rowan had already put in his two week notice to Maeve with hope in his heart and a ring in his pocket. He would do anything to make Aelin happy, and nothing would ruin them, not even the job of his dreams.

But apparently, they weren’t on the same page. Because when he had gone to visit her in Rifthold, ready to offer his life to her, she had crushed his spirits in less than 5 minutes. He had flown back home, but Rowan never figured out why she felt the urge to end their relationship. The lack of closure and the loss of the other half of his soul led him to ruins. For months he texted and called everyday, hoping that she would open up to him about her pain. But Aelin never answered. And she never texted. Next thing Rowan knew, he had stopped trying all together.

The Cadre did all they could to comfort him, but none of them were even close to understanding the aching pain he felt in his heart everyday. Lyria was the only one who could stand his somber demeanor, choosing to spend her breaks near his desk and chit chatting about office gossip during the slow days. At first, the distraction had been nice. But somewhere along the line, Lyria had become more serious about Rowan than he cared to admit.

Now here he was, with an almost-kind-of-talking-maybe-dating situationship that he didn’t understand even started. He mistook her friendliness for just that--friendship. But he also hadn’t stopped her. Deep down, Rowan knew that he was using Lyria, but he couldn’t help but keep the facade going on. Because if he was left alone again, Rowan didn’t think he would ever leave his apartment.

The nights were the worst, where he was alone with his endless thoughts, his regrets, his tears. The past 6 months had been rough, and if this was how he had to pick himself up again then so be it. Aelin sure as hell didn’t want him anymore and Rowan had to come to terms with it whether he liked it or not.

But still, sitting with his phone propped up in his hand, staring at his own face and the scoop of light pink ice cream in front of him, Rowan’s mind wandered to a simpler time. A time where they would be on a bench outside their infamous ice cream spot instead of the random ice cream parlor downtown. A time where Rowan’s eyes would be shining brighter staring into the deepest blue he had ever seen. A time where his fireheart would be taking that picture instead of the woman he strung along like a puppy dog.

Imagining his own heaven in his head combined with the bitter reality around him, Rowan felt a momentary sense of deja vu.

*****

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[seasonofthewicth]

quarantine questions

AN: this was inspired by the incredible @highqueenofelfhame ‘s fic everyone’s favourite teacher (which you can find here xxx and I 100% recommend). I absolutely adore that fic and couldn’t help but write my own spin on teacher Rowan and Aelin. 

p.s. one day I will write Aelin as something other than a teacher, today is just not that day. 

p.p.s. this isn’t a proposal fic I just can’t think of titles. Anyway, enjoy!

word count: ~2.2k

part 2 - part 3

------ 

Aelin loved her job, she really did, but Gods did quarantine make it difficult.

Normally she loved seeing the kids, they were great fun, and most of them wanted to learn and wanted to be in her classroom which meant the environment was positive and enjoyable. Even the kids that didn’t want to be there could usually be won over with a few tricks or promises of treats, which was always rewarding.

The interactions with the kids were what made her get up in the morning, the reason she had become a teacher in the first place was to satisfy her desire to help nurture children and to help them grow. But then the global pandemic had hit and the access to her students was reduced.

Not only did she have to adapt to trying to teach her lessons online, working out how the content could be explained using only her voice and a computer screen had pushed her in ways she hadn’t expected. While it was satisfying when she figured things out Aelin knew her lessons over zoom weren’t up to her usual standard.

That was the reason she had let her students know she would be at her desktop for an extra half an hour every day after school usually finished, for them to come to her if they had any problems or anything they wanted her to go through with them. Normally she would have operated her open-classroom-door policy, but a virtual replacement would have to do.

A good number of her students had taken up her offer of extra time to go through problems with her in the few weeks since she had started it, some came in groups for extra explanation for her lessons or some came individually for personal guidance.

As the clock struck 3:30 she joined the zoom call to wait for any students to join. It wasn’t long before a notification popped up telling her a student was requesting access to the call.

“Hello,” She called once the student had entered the call.

“Hey Miss G.” The student on the call was a young girl named Evangeline. 

Evangeline was an enthusiastic student and always tried her best. She sometimes struggled with the content, but her perseverance was what gave Aelin such a soft spot for her.

“Hey Evangeline, what can I do for you today?” She asked, making sure her tone was upbeat enough to invite questions.

“I just have a few questions about your lesson today I was hoping we could go through them?”

“Of course,” She said, grabbing her notepad and pen in case she needed to do any drawing of diagrams to aid her explanation, or make any notes for herself.

It didn’t take her long to go through Evangeline’s list of questions, they were all genuine and thought provoking, and it made Aelin smile knowing Evangeline had thought deeply about her teaching.

“Is that everything for today?” She asked capping her pen. “How are all the rest of your classes going?”

Evangeline took a deep breath, looking down below her computer screen and Aelin’s stomach turned nervously.

“They’re okay…” She started. “Most of them are fine, Spanish is even going well, it’s just Maths.”

Aelin shuffled where she sat, hoping the conversation wasn’t going where she thought it was as her student continued.

“I’m in Mr Whitethorn’s class, and his teaching in our lessons is fine, I’m just really struggling with the assignments. The class is huge too, so I don’t like to speak when I don’t get something.”

Mr Whitethorn.

Mr Rowan Whitethorn.

Aelin’s boyfriend of three years, not that Evangeline knew that, who was currently sitting in the room next door where he had been teaching his own zoom classes for the past few weeks.

She had met Rowan when she joined the school almost four years ago, she was newly qualified and nervous for her first proper teaching job. She had made friends quickly within her own department, the other history teachers Yrene and Elide were great fun and always up for a raucous night of drinking with Aelin. They had taken her under their wings when Aelin first started, which had led to her meeting Rowan.

The school was one of the largest in their district, meaning the different departments didn’t often mix, but one night Elide had brought along her boyfriend Lorcan, another maths teacher, who brought along his co-worker Rowan.

Rowan Whitethorn had not been what Aelin had expected. She remembered seeing him in the halls at school, dressed smartly in his button down and slacks, square framed glasses hiding most of his face.

In the bar Rowan Whitethorn had looked like a god. His tightly-fitted t-shirt highlighting his strongly-built arms and allowing her a long look at his intricate tattoo stretching down one of his arms that had previously been hidden. His silver hair shining in the bright lights as he towered over her to greet Elide.

He had flashed her a grin as he had taken the seat next to her and introduced himself and Aelin had been gone. Hooked on his slanted smile and the twinkle in his shining green eyes.

They had got along well all night, and he had bid her farewell with a chaste kiss on the cheek. The next morning she swallowed her pride and asked Elide if she could pass along his number. Elide had only replied with a phone number and a smirking emoji.

From there their relationship had been simple, but not boring. He drew out her fire and she loved him for it.

They had kept their relationship hidden at school, which had proven difficult once the quarantine kicked in and they had to hide the fact that their zoom lessons were taking place in the same house.

Aelin sighed, her attention only briefly drawn away from her student. “I’m sorry to hear that, Evangeline. Have you tried contacting Mr Whitethorn separately to let him know that you’re struggling? I’m sure he’d be more than willing to help you if he knew.”

She knew her boyfriend would be horrified to find out that a student was struggling and had been too shy to ask for help.

“No,” The young girl started, still blushing. “I’m not really sure what I would say.”

“I could help you draft an email if you wanted?” Aelin offered immediately and let out a soft sigh of relief as Evangeline nodded enthusiastically.

-----

Once her call with Evangeline had finished where Aelin had helped her to compose a draft email to Mr Whitethorn she shut her computer and left her office. She padded into the living room where she found her boyfriend lounging on the sofa, dressed in a pair of light grey sweats and a Doranelle University sweatshirt. 

Seeing him dressed so casually in their home sent a warm jolt through her chest, and an only slightly lesser rush of warmth headed somewhere slightly lower through her at the sight of him.

She flopped down next to him and burrowed her nose into his neck, breathing in his pine and snow scent.

“Hello, you.” His voice was soft as he pecked a kiss onto her cheek. “How was your day?”

She laughed, tilting her head up to face him. It wasn’t like she hadn’t seen him today; they coordinated their breaks to see each other throughout the days.

“Fine,” She said with a sly smile. “I helped one of my students draft an email for her ever so wonderful maths teacher, Mr Whitethorn, to ask for some extra help.”

“Oh Gods,” He laughed, a loud and bright sound, and tucked an arm around her shoulders pulling her in tight. “What a nightmare. He sounds like a great teacher to me.”

She snorted. “And modest.”

He poked her side. “I think he’ll get back to them tomorrow, he’s busy now anyway.”

With that he pressed a more meaningful kiss to her cheek and peppered them all the way down until his lips were pressed against her own. She leaned into the kiss, twisting her fingers through his thick hair to pull him closer towards herself.

It was incredible how he still managed to ignite her blood with a kiss, her skin burned where he touched. He slid his hands down her sides, tucking one into the crook of her knee and hitching her leg up over his own.

After a few minutes she managed to draw herself back for a breath. “He is very busy.” She pressed one last kiss against his lips. “Cooking his beautiful girlfriend her dinner. She’s very hungry.”

He growled, face pressed tightly against her neck and nipped the skin lightly with his teeth, a promise for later, but stood up, nonetheless. He held his hand out for hers and tugged her up to follow him to the kitchen.

-----

She knew Rowan had seen Evangeline’s email, and had arranged his own one-to-one session with her over zoom to go through her questions. They mostly tried to stay out of each other’s teaching, knowing that everyone had different styles and used different techniques, but they shared general pieces of information about their roles and their students.

She knew Evangeline was feeling better about his class now, she’d told her a couple of weeks later in another one of her post-school hours drop ins that she had spoken with him and he had offered her guidance on the assignment.

She also told Aelin that Mr Whitethorn had opened up the chat facility for students who weren’t confident in speaking aloud to ask questions during his lessons. Aelin had to bury her smirk at the comment, hiding the fact that Aelin herself had made that suggestion to a worried Rowan.

She was currently on an extended drop in session with around fifteen of her students going through one of the larger pieces of coursework she was setting for the class. She had tried to avoid setting large pieces of assessed work throughout the pandemic as she knew how difficult it was to work from home and she understood that not all students had a level playing field when working from home, but this one had been unavoidable.

This session had run way past the time she had allocated for it; they were over an hour into the half-hour time slot she normally used at the end of the day for the sessions.

She was listening to her students’ discussions of their ideas for the coursework, she encouraged group work and collaboration as long as the final pieces of work were completed independently.

She nodded along silently, until she heard a voice from behind her.

“Aelin, are you coming—” Rowan’s voice cut off as he froze in the doorway. 

She gasped, whirling in her seat, aware of the students on her call falling silent.

Her eyes flew back to her computer screen to check the small square in the corner that showed what her students could see of her.

Rowan was clearly well inside the frame where he stood behind her, frozen with his hand on the door handle, his mouth hanging open in an exaggerated o-shape.

She turned back towards him, her own eyes as wide as his as they met, neither knowing what to say or how they could explain his presence in her house with anything other than the truth. She knew there were too many students on her session for this to stay a secret too, the news would spread along the student network in no time.

Rowan’s mouth snapped shut and he began to inch backwards to where he had come from, but he was interrupted by a voice.

“Hey Mr Whitethorn.” Evangeline’s voice was clear over the zoom call, and it snapped Aelin out of her stupor.

“Hey guys,” Rowan’s voice was croaky. “I’ll just be—”

“Mr Whitethorn will be going now.” At her raised eyebrows he raised his hands in apology and crept back out of the room, pulling the door closed softly behind himself.

Aelin dropped her forehead to her hands and puffed out a laugh, before glancing back up at her screen.

At least five of her students were visibly on their mobiles, tapping away. Those who weren’t all wore mischievous grins. This was mortifying.

“I know why he was so helpful after our chat now Miss G.” Evangeline’s voice was smug even over the video call.

“Yes, well. Sorry about that, anyway, moving on.” She could move past this; she would move past this.

----

She left the room once the call with her students was finished, most of the awkwardness had cleared by the time the call had ended, but she had no doubt that there wasn’t a single student in the school who wouldn’t have heard about this by the next day.

She collapsed onto the sofa, her face buried in a pillow next to where Rowan sat, looking down at her sheepishly.

“I’m so sorry Aelin.”

She let out a muffled scream before taking a deep breath and looking up at him, a wonky smile spreading across her face.

“It’s not your fault,” She told him. “It’s this rutting quarantine.”

------ 

In regard to tags, I have so far assumed that anyone who has previously asked to be tagged had requested specifically for my new girl au fic, if you want to be added to a general tag list for things like this please let me know!

[theladyofdeath]

The Cadre {19}

A Throne of Glass, 1920s Period AU.

Summary: Orynth became Aelin Galathynius’s kingdom the moment the Prohibition began. She sang every night, the voice of the city’s underground world, her cousin selling the liquor that was banned by the authorities. She was living the dream, young and free, until the Cadre, until Rowan Whitethorn, came into her life.

Since Rowan Whitethorn returned from war, everything had changed. His aunt wants to take his crown, old enemies have returned as business partners, and he can’t sleep without feeling as if he’ll be suffocated by the memories of war. Little did he know that when he came back home he would be leaving one battlefield and entering another.

All characters belong to SJM. I am no more than a fan with a plot.

**Warning: mature content - language, alcohol use, drug use, sex, murders and shit.

A/N: The one before the finale....and the finale is a long one.

After chapter 20, I’ll be starting  In the Bleak Midwinter {The Cadre, Part 2} If I’ve tagged you in this, I’ll tag you in that, too! x

Links:

The Cadre Masterlist

Full Fanfic Masterlist

My Askbox

Days had passed before Gavriel found the nerve to approach Aedion’s office. The next day, they would have to come together to face Arobynn’s men, so it was now or never. After a hesitant knock, Gavriel pushed opened the door.

It was humorous, really, how nervous he was to meet with his own child. Gavriel had met with Aedion on a handful of occasions, and yet, this was the most nervous he’d ever been encountering another human being. 

Aedion was surprised when he entered, setting down the report he’d been reading.

“Gavriel,” he said, in way of greeting.

“Aedion,” Gavriel nodded.

“Sit, please,” he said, quietly.

Gavriel nodded, sitting in the seat across from Aedion’s desk.

“I assume you got my letter,” Aedion said. 

Clearing his throat, Gavriel nodded. “Yes, Lysandra got it to me. I, um, I’m sorry it’s taken me a few days to come here…”

“I’ve waited nineteen years,” Aedion said, leaning back in his chair. “A few more days didn’t kill me.”

It was guilt that settled in the pit of Gavriel’s stomach, but he deserved it. “Right. Well...Look, Aedion….”

“Did you know?” Aedion asked, when it was clear Gavriel was at a loss for words. “Did you know that you were my father?”

Gavriel hesitated, but then he answered, honestly, “Yes.”

Aedion nodded, jaw locking, disappointed.

“It’s not that I didn’t want to be a part of your life, Aedion,” Gavriel went on, desperately. “But, I was a part of the Cadre already then, and your mother was an Ashryver. There was bad blood between our groups, and after your mother passed, and you were placed in Rhoe and Evalin’s care...well, they didn’t know, you see, who I was. Your mother had lied to protect me, claiming that your father was some random, low-life man who wanted nothing to do with you. It was easier that way, she claimed, and your mother was a stubborn woman. Especially when it came to you.”

Aedion nodded, thoughtfully. “I see.”

“You don’t know how many times I’ve wanted to approach you,” Gavriel breathed. “I have wanted so desperately to know you, but I eventually reached the conclusion that it was nothing more than a dream. We were so young when Saoirse got pregnant, we weren’t sure at all what to do. Especially me. By the time your mom told me to stay away….It was selfish, Aedion, but it was easier. Then, after she died, I knew you were in good hands, and I didn’t want to disrupt the peace.”

Aedion’s eyes fell. “I see,” he repeated, then he asked, “Did you love her, though? She certainly seemed to love you.”

“Very much,” Gavriel breathed. “Your mother...was an incredible woman. Kind, smart, sarcastic…” Gavriel chuckled as his words faded away. “She loved me, and I had no idea why, but she did. When I found out she was pregnant, I was ecstatic. Then, when I found out she passed…” He shook his head, slowly. “I had a lot of regret. Words left unsaid, time spent apart. Knowing I wouldn’t be able to be a part of your childhood.”

Aedion was silent for a long moment.

His turquoise, gold-rimmed eyes, that reminded Gavriel so painfully of his late love, were full of distress, confusion. But then he asked, “Could you tell me more about her? My mom?”

Gavriel let loose a long, slow breath. “Of course, anything you want to know.”

Aedion nodded, but said nothing more.

Gavriel supposed there wasn’t a lot to say. He’d never been in a situation where he wanted to say so much but also so little at the exact same time. It was complicated, to say the least.

“Perhaps we can meet at the pub one night, then,” Aedion went on. “And you can tell me stories about her. About your time together.”

Gavriel was nodding before he was even done, “Of course. I’d like that.”

“Good,” he said. “Tomorrow night? After the shit with Arobynn, of course.”

“Of course,” Gavriel said. “I’ll be there.”

“Okay,” Aedion said.

“Okay,” Gavriel said, unable to stop his smile. Then he was standing, and saying goodbye. When he walked out, and the door shut behind him, he fell back against the wall, covering his face with his hands.

Aedion.

His son.

His son that looked just like Saoirse.

He was ready to know, to learn, to hear, to listen.

And Gavriel wanted so badly to prove himself. 

Tomorrow, after their fucked up shit with Arobynn was done, Gavriel would tell him everything. They’d sit together, and Gavriel would reminisce, and Aedion would learn about his parents, about how he came to be. 

And it was the thought that unraveled him.

But Gavriel quickly dried his eyes, adjusted his hat, and swept out on the streets of Orynth, hands shoved into his pockets. 

~~~~~

Elide looked in the mirror, nude, running her hands over her abdomen, even though nothing had happened to it yet. Even so, she felt the change. She knew there was a life growing inside of her, but the moment it was confirmed by her doctor in the city, her entire outlook changed.

It was half her, half Lorcan, a little, innocent infant, growing inside of her. In eight months or so, she would be giving birth to a little girl or boy, one that hopefully looked like their father but had their mother’s temper.

Their father’s temper was a little much.

A baby.

Elide couldn’t get over it.

She was going to have a baby.

Lorcan’s baby.

“You look like a hell of a conversation is going on inside of your mind,” Lorcan muttered from where he laid in her bed.

Elide rolled her eyes. “Just thinking about how I’m going to be looking like a whale in no time.”

Lorcan had been supportive the past few days. Even after their fight days before, things were going better than ever. 

“A beautiful whale,” Lorcan muttered, eyes falling shut. It was growing late, and the time was ticking by. Before they knew it, it would be tomorrow, and tomorrow was a big day. 

“Are you ready?” Elide asked, as the thought ran through her mind. “For tomorrow.”

“It’s not the first gang war I’ve ever been in,” Lorcan mumbled, eyes still shut. And Elide heard his unanswered comment, It probably won’t be the last.

“I’ll be here, waiting,” she said, calmly, still looking in the mirror, if only to avoid him. Not because she wanted to, because the anxiety of what the next day would bring was too much. “When it’s finished.” 

Lorcan said nothing, and when she turned around, he was still laying on her bed, his arms behind his head, his eyes closed. 

“Is this what it will be like?” Elide asked. “Being with you? Having you as a husband? A father to my child? Constantly in fear that you’ll be shot and killed?”

“I’ve been shot multiple times,” Lorcan muttered, eyes still shut. “Never killed.”

“You’re not invincible,” Elide mumbled. 

“No,” Lorcan agreed. “I’m not.”

There was no point in arguing, no point in fighting, no point in bringing up the pain that tomorrow might bring, because it wouldn’t do any good. This was who Lorcan was, this was his life, this was the way it would be. This is how he would support Elide and their child, by living this life, by doing business with Rowan Whitethorn. 

Being against it wouldn’t do her, or their baby, any good.

“You worry too much,” he continued, at last. “I’ll be fine. I’ve always been fine.”

“You better be fine,” she said, sitting on the edge of the bed. “I still have to give you my answer.”

He’d asked her to marry him, and she claimed she would let him know once he returned from the standoff with Arobynn. She thought that was fair enough. If he returned, she would tell him yes, and if he didn’t, no harm done.

The thought left Elide’s heart aching.

“You don’t ever get scared, do you?” Elide asked.

Lorcan shrugged. “I would if I didn’t know what I was doing, but we have a plan. We know what we’re doing. Rowan is a good leader. We’ll prevail.” 

Elide nodded, slipping her hand into his. “Well, I’m scared.”

The light in Lorcan’s eyes softened as he squeezed her hand, meeting her gaze. “I’m not going to get hurt,” he whispered. “I promise. I’m coming to find you, the moment it’s done, and you’re going to tell me that you’re going to marry me, and it all will be okay, alright?”

Elide huffed a laugh as she nodded, although there was still a knot in her stomach. She laid her cheek against his chest and closed her eyes, although there would be no sleeping for her tonight.

~~~~~

“Are you ready?”

“For what? To take down Arobynn?”

“Obviously.”

“I have no choice but to be ready.”

Rowan and Aelin laid awake in her bed, in her little studio apartment, as the night dragged on. There would be no sleeping tonight, as the next day would only bring anxiety and pain. So, despite Rowan’s sore shoulder, they’d made love and were now lying together, their skin against one another’s, in the dim moonlight, atop Aelin’s bed.

“I still can’t believe everything went so well with my dad,” Aelin muttered, against his chest.

Rowan chuckled. “You’re very convincing.” 

With a roll of her eyes, Aelin grinned. “You’re so full of shit.”

“You keep telling me that,” Rowan muttered. 

Aelin chuckled. “Because it’s true.”

“I don’t wanna talk about any of that,” Rowan said, brushing the golden strands out of her face. “I don’t wanna talk about your father, or Arobynn, or tomorrow….”

“Then what do you want to talk about?” she asked, quietly. 

Rowan was quiet for a moment. Then, he said, softly, “Nothing. Just be here with me.”

“Okay,” she agreed, snuggling up as close to him as she could get. 

They laid like that for hours, Rowan rubbing slow, gentle circles on her back with his fingertips. He ran through the plan in his mind over and over and over again. He’d sent Arobynn a letter the day before, saying that he couldn’t find Maeve, but that he wouldn’t back down. They’d meet at the docks at noon to faceoff. Even with his and Rhoe’s men, they would be outnumbered, but Rowan was confident. 

Confident enough, anyway, but apparently still worried enough not to get any sleep. He had been sleeping better in the last week, with Aelin beside him, his calming anchor, but tonight was different.

Tonight, he watched Aelin, with her eyes closed, her chest rising and falling with steady breaths. She clung to his chest, as if she, too, was afraid to let go.

Because yes, Rowan was confident in his men, but if someone died tomorrow, it was going to be him.

~~~~~

Just after dawn, Arobynn stood at the docks, helping Maeve onto the ship to Eyllwe.

“Take care of business and come straight back,” he ordered.

“I will,” she promised, kissing his lips before letting go of his hand and stepping on board the ship with her travelling case. 

Arobynn watched as she disappeared with his child in her womb. He didn’t like the thought of her being away from him while she carried his child, but as life went on, business had to, also.

She wouldn’t be gone long, though, and he would be distracted, building his empire.

Starting with today.

He turned on his heels, heading back to his warehouse where his men would soon be gathering, preparing.

They had to get ready.

Come noon, they would have a man to kill. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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[divinerivals]

Congrats on 1k!!🥳💜 Your gorgeous writing deserves it😍 For the mutual mixtape, do you think you could do Manorian + K. by Cigarettes After Sex as a drabble, please? 😘✌️

🥺🥺🥰 Aww thank you love! You’re so sweet! 

I’ll wait forever

Song of Choice- K.- Cigarettes After Sex (I actually made this a drabble *pats self on back*)

Dorian climbed the stairs up to his old chambers. His footsteps along the cool stone are the only sounds to be heard. Parts of the palace were still being reworked and this was one of them. It had been five months since they saved Terrasen and all of Erilea from Erawan and Meave. Five months since he had seen her. The night of Aelin’s coronation where the two of them poured all their passion and love into each other throughout the night. Holding Manon until she slept soundly in his arms. It was as good as it would be with her for sometime, he knew that. Yet he wished she could stay with him and never leave.

 He told himself every night, every day that Manon hadn’t visited because she was busy delegating in the witch kingdom. As time passed he was beginning to think she’d never return to him. Perhaps as the last Crochan queen she found her place and no need to look back. The feeling unsettled him. More than he cared to admit. It was there and grew ever present as days wore on. 

He despised only having Manon in his mind, his dreams. Despised that the tip of his fingers could not run along her skin, or through strands of hair kissed by moonlight. The dreams he had of crimson lips and golden eyes were more haunting than blissful. It pained him and yet, he couldn’t let go. Believing she would one day return.

 Dorian wasn’t sure when he fell for the half Crochan, half Ironteeth witch. He knew the first time she stayed and slept in his arms, that Manon was no distraction. She was more than that, and slowly she healed the cracks in his heart from Sorscha. With every smirk, kiss, touch, the way she loved her people and Abraxos. Cold on the outside, but on the inside she was burning with love only few could see. He considered himself lucky to have been so close he could touch that fire. 

His palm moved along the smooth stone walls as he reached the hall. There were still scratches and marks littered across the stones from when the witches attacked Adarlan. If he shut his eyes he could still hear servants screaming during the chaos of it all. Dorian made his way through the isolated hall reaching the wrought iron door. He yanked it open with a loud thud. The door groaned with an almost eerie sound as he stepped in.

There was no debris scattered along the floor anymore. The bed had been removed as well as most of the furniture. Whether saved or tossed he didn’t know. From what transpired here, thrown out was his estimation. Dorian could picture Manon flying into his chambers on Abraxos. Her face all the might of a warrior ready for bloodshed. Her eyes when she landed on him were mingled with worry and care. He knew she’d still deny it. The King of Adarlan smiled at the thought wandering to the edge of the room. Towards the gaping hole on the side. He saw the building she landed on mere nights after the Valg Prince was cast from his body. How she waved at him. He waved at her. 

Gods above did he miss her. Perhaps he should have taken her on the marriage alliance. Dorian sat on the floor with a soft plop staring out into the darkened skies. Thinking of all the times they were entangled together. The nights during and after Morath where he thought of her. Not only the way she felt when they laid together and forgot the world. But how she said his name when she reached her high. Like he was her divine salvation. When they stayed in their camp on a cot talking of the shared burden of crowns. Thinking of the way she shielded herself from worrying of him. When he knew deep down Manon was terrified for him. It was that moment, when she refused to speak to him for days, that he could tell her feelings were changing. She was starting to feel something genuine and true.

Now as he sits on the cold stone floor, feeling more like a boy with a broken heart. Than a King ruling a land. Resting his cheek on his fist, fingers tracing the floor making icy swirls in their wake as he sighed deeply out of frustration and boredom. Being separated from her, Dorian learned one thing. He preferred the world just with her and no one else. A foolish thought for a king and wItch queen, it was one that gave him comfort nonetheless. That and the thought of kissing and holding her until she fell asleep in his arms. 

“Manon,” he spoke to the open air, watching the stars twinkling in the night. Wondering if she’s looking at the same ones, “I know it’s stupid and you can’t hear me. I wish you’d come back already. I’ve been waiting for you and I still will. However long it takes.”

It was that moment, he heard the thunderous roar of a Wyvren.

*******************************************************************************

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[tomtenadia]

Island Dreams - Chapter 12

Hello lovlies,

here we are with chapter 12. This should be, according to my plans, the last of the very angsty chapters. Now things should start to head towards fluff. I kinda plotted the ideas for all chapters and in a moment of inspiration I wrote a moment with plenty of fluff. They are getting there. Also, please don't hate Elias. He loves her. He really does. They are both just very impulsive.

At the very beginning Rowan says "mo chridhe" well, I am not going to give you a translation this time. Aelin will discover its meaning in the next chapter. You just have to sit tight a bit longer.

-------------------------

Days rolled over quickly and Aelin’s d-day had eventually arrived. It was the day she was meant to meet with Elias. She had been nervous and in a bad mood since she had received the message and didn’t get any closer to figuring out a way to let the man down gently.

So that morning she had woken up as usual, scoffed the remnants of the chocolate cake she had bought from Maeve’s and tried to instil in herself the idea that everything will be okay. Rowan had given her again the morning off and she was quite happy since she had to go and get herself a laptop. She was quite serious in her goal of finding a job as a doctor on the islands and she definitely needed her own computer.

Elias had kindly recommended her a place in town and she decided she could go on foot. The day was going to be nice again and she craved the fresh air. With the address in her hands she was surprised that she found it without the need of the GPS on her phone and happiness took her at the realisation that she was getting very familiar with the town. A few more years, she told her herself, and I will be a local. Elias had been amazing as his usual and had given her some info on what to look for in a laptop and she was grateful for his help and felt horrible at the idea of how much pain she was going to cause him. Half an hour later she had a box under her arm and she was on her way to the bookshop. She missed Rowan. “Madainn mhath!” She greeted him with a huge smile, her mood suddenly improving at the sight of him. That day he was wearing a green hoodie that almost matched his eyes and her heart skipped a beat. “Madainn mhath, mo chridhe.” Aelin walked to him and dumped her box on the floor “What was the last part?” Rowan’s face turned red at the realisation that he had spoken too much “It means my menace.” He lied and she knew it. She was still learning Gaelic, but she had a feeling he had used a term of endearment. It was the loving tone and the hint of a smile that betrayed him. She just had to try and figure out the meaning on her own. Problem was she had no idea how to write down the word. In her basic lessons of Gaelic from Rowan she had soon realised that often Gaelic would pronounce far less letters than the ones written down and some sounds were not written the way she thought. “Sure, keep your secrets.” Gently she poked him on the shoulder. A totally pointless gesture. Given his muscles he probably didn’t even feel her. “What do you have there?” He pointed at the box. “I bought a laptop. You know… for work stuff…” grabbing her belongings she went for his office where she got ready for another day. Nervousness knotted her stomach. After the day had spent gallivanting around a part of Scotland she felt as if the energy between them had shifted again and she had no idea how to address it. “I phoned back the school and I told them that I will give it a try.” He said calmly while typing away on the keyboard. Aelin stared at him amazed “Ro, it’s wonderful.” And she meant it. He nodded timidly. “You don’t seem convinced.” She moved a step closer and her hand landed on his arm and the tightness in her chest loosened a bit when he did not shy away from that contact. He shook his head “I am okay. I really like the idea. It’s just the whole going back to a swimming pool without competing it feels alien.” “I am freaking out about the idea of going back to work in an hospital.” she confessed knowing exactly where he was coming from. The idea of being a doctor again was wonderful but a part of her was terrified at the idea that what happened in London might have broken her completely. He looked at her in understanding. “When it happens, you will be incredible.” He finally looked at her and she noticed the sincerity of his words in his eyes. “Sure, Buzzard, but for now I want to redo the whole fantasy section. It’s bugging me and we need a new display.” And she crossed her arms at her chest “You finish that paperwork. I am on a mission.” She added cracking her hands and marching to her favourite corner of the bookshop. Rowan laughed and kissed her head “Go, have fun.” In response she gave him a grin. Ten minutes later all the books were on the floor, the shelves in the Fantasy section were empty and Aelin was sitting down on the floor reading a book. “You are supposed to organise them and put them back, not read them.” Rowan admonished her from the counter. “Shhh… I am in the zone.” “No you are in the way.” And with his head he pointed at a couple of customers. “I am sorry,” she apologised jumping back on her feet “I am redoing this section. If you need any help, let me know, please.” “We were looking for the fiction section.” Aelin walked them to the correct area “If you need any recommendations, Rowan is your man.” The couple thanked them and she went back to her job. She picked up the book she was reading and gave it to Rowan, “set it aside. I am buying it later.” “You are just as bad as me.” “That’s why you love me.” Shit. “I meany you love working with me.” She corrected herself but the damage was done. So far, their plan of taking it slow did not include using the l-word. Yet. “Who told you I love working with you? Look at the mess you make of my poor books.” He pretended to be stern but she noticed the light in his eyes and the very slight uptick on the right side of his lips. He was trying not to laugh. “I should really start calling you menace instead of Fireheart.” Aelin stuck her tongue out and went back to work. It took her a few hours but the shelves were now more to her liking and she took a step back to admire her work. Rowan joined her to have a look at her project. “Right here in the centre at eye level I placed the book of the month. The two red bars at its side bring it out to attention and the plastic holder underneath has a message that says something about the book and entices the potential reader.” She explained to him “we should have more around the shop. More book recommendations.” Then she took a photo with her mobile “And this will be our official social media post. “I love it.” “And I am amazing.” He laughed “you are amazing.” His arms went around her waist. The two customer had paid and left and they were alone so he could let himself go with a bit of PDA. She stared up at him and his heart began racing and in that exact moment she decided to lean against his chest and hoped she could not hear his heart pumping hard “I love your hoodie.” “Well, you can’t have this one. Buy your own one.” She caressed his pecs and felt his muscles underneath “But if I buy my own one than it won’t smell like you.” Rowan’s hand went onto hers “You buy one, then I will wear it so it smells like me. How does it sound?” “Pinky promise?”she lifted her hand with her pinky extended. “What are you? Five?” She looked at him with puppy eyes and he rolled his in acceptance. “Fine.” He yielded. “Pinky promise.” He was doomed. He was so madly in love with her that he would even swear a pinky promise just to see her give him the smile that would melt his heart. “Ro?” He looked down to her while never breaking their embrace. “You know I have dinner with Elias tonight.” Rowan’s body went rigid. She had mentioned that. She had explained to him why she had to do it and although he had supported her, he had openly admitted to her that he was jealous. He wanted her to dump the guy and screw his feeling, but that was not what Aelin wanted. And doing that would make her miserable and that’s the last thing he wanted. “I remember.” That’s all he could muster. “And you are mad at me.” “I am not. I told you.” She pulled away from him and he missed the contact with her body. “I need to do this, okay? You know I have to do this if we want to… well… whatever is the next step in our relationship.” She sounded almost hurt and it broke his heart. “Aelin, I know. And I am not mad.” He pulled her to him again “I am just being selfish and a lot jealous.” “I don’t love him, Ro.” I love you, you idiot. “But I owe him. He has always been nice to me and he deserves the truth.” “I know.” He kissed her temple “I know.” They pulled apart as soon as they heard a customer enter the shop. The rest of the afternoon continued with them adding suggestions around the shop and Rowan beginning to post confidently on the shop’s Facebook page about all the books of the months they had chosen. Aelin had told him they already had five followers, but he had no idea what she was talking about, he just trusted her. “Go home.” He had told her later on that evening “You need to get ready.” “I can stay.” But he shook his head. “We are closing in an hour anyway. I will be okay.” She kissed his cheek “I will see you tomorrow.” He bushed her hand in response “I trust you.” She nodded, collected all of her stuff and left.

Aelin got home from the shop a bit early so she could have the time to take a shower and get properly dressed. She pulled off Rowan’s hoodie and stopped thinking about his expression when she reminded him that she was going out with Elias. He was aware that she wanted to let the man down gently and Rowan in the end understood. I trust you he had told her before letting her go. Aelin had been grateful for that week that Elias had been away because she had the chance to analyse her feeling, her growing feelings for Rowan. They had the best time together and she longed for the moment she would stop feeling like she was cheating on Elias every time she touched Rowan. She needed closure, but she also had to do it in a way not to break the man’s heart. At 7pm Elias rang the bell to her house and when she opened the door he was standing in front of her. He had a pair of jeans on, a shirt and a blue jumper on top of it, looking neat and very charming. But the pang of attraction she had felt at the beginning was not there anymore. She, had opted for a smart casual attire as well, not wanting to dress up too much and give the wrong idea. “Hi you.” His expression lit up with one of his bright and dazzling smile while his arm went around her waist pulling her close for a quick kiss that she allowed. “I hope you like seafood.” Aelin nodded scared about what emotions her voice would betray. “Then let’s go.” Once outside she noticed his car was not around. “We are walking,” he said when he noticed her looking for the vehicle. His hand was extended in front of him and she took it very reluctantly. “How…” she stumbled on her words “How was Glasgow.” “I love the city, but work was so boring but I had to do it. I spent the week in never-ending meetings. And missed you of course.” He squeezed the hand. “How was yours?” Shit. “Fine, I have been working at the bookshop and on Saturday and Sunday I was out exploring.” “Have you been somewhere nice?” Lie. Lie, her brain kept telling her. “On Sunday I went across the water to Ullapool and drove around a bit. I was reading my guide on Saturday evening and when it seemed doable I just went for it.” And she hoped he believed her. “I wish I could have come with you, I know the area very well.” So does Rowan. Ten minutes later they reached the restaurant: the Harbour kitchen, apparently a great place for seafood freshly caught. Or at least that was what the locals said. Elias had reserved a table and when it was time to sit down he was a proper gentleman and pulled the chair out for her “M’lady…” He sat down as well and the waiter brought the menu while Elias ordered a bottle of wine. “You drink, don’t you?” Aelin nodded. She looked at the menu and the food sounded amazing. ‘This is one of my favourite places, the food here is great.” She could see the joy in him. She kept her gaze on the menu, using the excuse she could not make up her mind. They were silent for a moment and she welcome the respite. How was she supposed to break up with him? Did she just tell him whatever there was between it was over? That she loved Rowan? She almost growled. She hadn’t been able to speak to Lysandra and now she had no idea on how to do it properly. “Aelin?” She looked up and noticed that the waiter was there at her side. Apologising, she placed her order and Elias extended his arm and placed his hand on hers on the table and she almost flinched. “How is the bookshop?” He asked and she noticed that it costed him to show interest in something he had clearly admitted to be against. “Busy. I have set up Rowan with a Facebook page and Instagram fro the shop and we are working on online ordering. Plus, tourist season has started, so nice and busy.” Her tone was flat and he noticed it. “You seem pretty invested in that shop.”and there it was, his hate for the choice she had made of working there instead of going back to her old job. A waste he had called it. “Just helping a friend.” And she looked outside the window ignoring his gaze. Ignoring the pain his words were causing. “Sounds like is not a good business manager if he needs a doctor to help him.” Aelin grabbed her glass and took a sip of the wine to try and hide her gritted teeth. What happened to the nice guy she met on the beach? Jealousy, her brain told her. “He just doesn’t use Facebook. Some people don’t feel the need to be on social media and there is nothing wrong with it.” She might have uttered those words with a bit more venom than intended. At her sharp tone his hand clench a little in annoyance and he was about to add another snarky remark when their food arrived and she thanked that now she had an excuse to stay in silence at least for a while. This was not going well, but he was clearly insulting Rowan and his job and she could not allow that. “Are you enjoying the food?” He added after five minutes of neither of them uttering a word. His tone had lost the loving edge it had when they first arrived. “Yeah, it’s nice.” Her response was almost devoid of all emotions. ‘What?” He asked when he noticed her reaction “Are you mad at me because I insulted you book buddy?” Aelin grabbed the glass and almost threw it in his face and stormed out of the restaurant but she could not cause a scene. So she breathed in and counted till 10 “Just tired.” “I have been looking forward to see you for days. I was not expecting this.” He whispered through gritted teeth. “I am sorry I forgot my red carpet and the roses, your highness, I am ready for my ten lashes.” And the fire-bitch queen, as Chaol used to call her, was back in full swing. Good job, Aelin. She hated the words as soon as they left her mouth. But the damage was done and once again she was going to pay for her inability to filter her thoughts before talking. She had not meant to fight with him, but apparently fate had other plans in mind for her. She was so tired of fighting. “You are not yourself tonight. Is it because of him?” Elias was jealous, that was blatantly clear. She might have been impulsive, but he had been downright arrogant. “I told you I am tired.” And she slammed her fork on the plate a bit too hard. “Well, take a day off. I am sure book boy can work on his own for a day.” Aelin stood and grabbed her bag.”You know what?” She whispered trying not to cause a scene. “If you can’t talk about Rowan without insulting him, we are done here.” She was about to leave when he grabbed her wrist but she pulled free and left the restaurant.

Elias went to pay quickly and ran after her “Aelin.” He shouted a few times but she ignored him. Eventually he caught up and gently grabbed her writs “Aelin…” his tone suddenly much more gentle than what had been in the restaurant. He had behaved horribly. All he wanted was a nice night with her. However, he could not forget that he had spent a whole week agonising over the fact that she was alone in the shop with Rowan and it drove him mad because, yes, he was so damn jealous. “I am so sorry.” When she turned Elias noticed she was in tears and his heart sank “Elias this is not working.” She blurted out while sobbing “Whatever this is… I can’t” “I love working at the bookshop and until I feel ready to be a doctor again that is what I will do. And I am tired of listening to you insulting the shop and Rowan.” He was not ready for the look full of hurt in her eyes. He wanted to see her smile and nothing more. “This is not working, Elias. We are not working and I am sick and tired of being in pain.” He stared at her and for a while he was immobile as if stunned by her words. “You love him, don’t you?” Elias’ voice was almost a whisper but she heard him nonetheless. In frustration his hands ran through his hair and he groaned “I have been such a stupid fool not to notice.” In the meantime, Aelin had taken a seat on one of the benches at the marina while Elias was not towering in front of her and she kept avoiding his gaze like the coward she felt. “That’s why you almost ignored me while I was away. And why your texts were cold all of a sudden.” Aelin didn’t answer and kept staring at the small fishing boats moored at the pier, while tears kept flowing down her cheeks “I had to sort out my feelings.” “Clearly not your feelings for me.” She clenched her fingers “Life happens,” her tone almost a growl. “No, annoying bookseller happened. You were fine until you started working there.” His anger back in his words. She finally found the strength to stand and face him “This is between me and you. Damn it, Elias we were not together, we were still trying to figure out things. It’s my feelings okay? I am the one who fell in love with him, so leave Rowan out of this.” She shouted, now clenching both hands in fists “I am the one who is so messed up and could not make up her bloody mind. Blame me for this.” Suddenly her back was at him again “This is not how it was meant to go down.” She leaned against the wall of the pier. She turned and he was in front of her. In a swift movement he kissed her “tell me you don’t feel anything. Have the guts to tell me that the time we spent together meant nothing. Be truthful, damn it. I deserve it.” Her hand went in front of her mouth to stifle the sob rippling through her “I loved the time I spent with you.” She finally looked at him and the pain she saw in his eyes almost broke her “But my feelings for Rowan developed before the ones I had for you had time to form.” It was a pathetic excuse but it was all she could give him just now. She started shaking and he offered her his jacket. “You are cold,” his voice soft again. “Don’t be nice to me. I don’t deserve it.” She refused the jacket. “Aelin… I am sorry for what I said.” He moved a step closer, he could not see her in that much pain. She did not answer for a moment “I didn’t want to hurt you.” She sobbed tears flowing again “I am so bad at this, but I didn’t want to hurt you.” “I know.” He pushed behind her ear a rebellious lock of hair “Let me walk you home, you are freezing.” Aelin nodded and they walked back to her place in silence. Once in front of her house they stopped. Aelin took out of her purse “Let me pay for half of the dinner.” His hand stopped her “Don’t even think about it.” “But… I have been horrible to you.” “I don’t care, I am not letting you pay.” And caressed her cheek “Can we talk tomorrow? In a more civilised way? I accept your feelings. I really do, but if we have to part I want to do it in a better fashion. Tonight’s fight was nasty and I’d hate to remember our time together having such a brutal ending.” Aelin managed a faint smile “Yeah. Yeah, it sounds good.” And Aelin’s heart felt all of a sudden lighter. “Good.” He kissed her cheek “I’ll text you tomorrow with an ETA of when I am meant to finish work. Is it okay with you?” “Yes, Elias.” He winked at her and left. Aelin stood outside the house and stared at the sea for a while, but when the wind picked up again she ran back in the house. She changed in her jammies and plopped on the sofa with a cup of chamomile tea. She felt horrible after the horrible dinner they had. But she was looking forward discussing things with him in a more civilised way. She hated the fight and all she had said. She did care about him, just not in the way he hoped. She sighed and grabbed the book on the coffee table. Her mobile lay beside it and when she retrieved it she found a text from Rowan How was the evening? Are you okay? Disaster was all she texted back. A couple of minutes later his reply came Would you like to talk about it? And laughed. Rowan was still coming to grasp the whole texting thing and she loved the fact that he always used proper grammar, punctuation and never contracted any words. Not yet she replied. Please, take the morning off tomorrow. I will handle the hordes of tourists on my own. I will see you in the afternoon. She laughed. K. <3 XOXO was her reply and she waited to see his. Is that a sort of secret code? Good night, grandpa. A smile appeared on her face. She adored their banter and mocking him for his limited knowledge of certain aspect of technology was fun, although she found it quite attractive and fascinating.

In the end she decided to go to bed instead. And before switching off the light she flipped through the pictures she had taken of their adventure and chose one of the two of them together as a home screen. “Night, Buzzard.”

[throneofsapphics]

cold shoulder

Rowaelin x f!Reader

Summary: You got into an argument with Aelin, and she gets sick of you ignoring her.

A/N: Tiny plot, mostly smut.

Word Count: ~3.4k

Warnings: NSFW, possessive, overstimulation, slightly dark, light d/s. I think that's it.

I’d finally made a friend. It took nearly six months, the entire castle avoiding me like the plague after I came to live here. The Queen and King’s mate, whispers would follow me, somehow unaware I could hear them. 

Both Rowan and Aelin were gone, leaving me to my own devices in the castle. My head was pounding, and I made my way towards the healers room. The castle always had one on call. I know where it is, but I’d never visited. I took a few breaths to center myself, facing the heavy oak door, and knocked three times. 

“Oh come on in you bastards.” The voice, a female - or woman, chuckled from within. I fought the urge to smile, pushing the door open. 

“Apologies if I wasn’t who you were expecting.” The woman standing in the room squeaked, dropping the glass in her hands. A wave of magic caught it and laid it on the table for her. “I’m Y/N.” I introduced myself, but didn’t hold out a hand. It was polite to let her do that. 

“Oh Gods I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to call you that. I’m Reina” 

“I’m happy to meet you Reina. I heard I might find some tea here. To help with headaches..” I shifted back and forth on my feet as she jumped up, ruffling through some of the several jars of dried herbs, to make a small mixture, placing it in a small glass canister and screwing the lid on. “You’re a saint,” I breathed, and she laughed. 

“Would you like for me to brew it for you?” 

I debated for a few long moments. It couldn’t hurt to talk to someone. “I’d love that.” I finally said. She nodded rapidly before fluttering around the room again. I made casual conversation, asking her where she’s from, about her family, and what she thinks of the castle. Of course she didn’t dare say anything negative about it. Even if she did, I wouldn’t report back. 

“Thank you.” I said as she pushed the warm mug in my hands, along with the tin full of more herbal mixture. Staying here to drink it might be pushing her comfort levels. “I’ll return the mug.” 

She smiled, opening the door for me. “It was lovely to meet you.” 

“And you as well.” Her voice squeaked again.  

-

I was chatting with Reina, the woman who’d given me the tea all those months ago. I’d visited her again a few times, and she’d always been more than helpful - always had a solution or a brew for something. Honestly, I craved company as well, and she was cheerful and knowledgeable. I learned so much about herbs and plants from her, and soaked the knowledge up like a sponge - even going to pull some extra books in the library. 

Reina and I stopped towards the end of a hallway, when she told me she’d be leaving, at the end of the week - back to her village. She’d been here on an apprenticeship, to learn more and go back to serve her village. A program that Aelin started years ago, shortly after her coronation. 

I gave her a tight hug, she seemed surprised but hugged me back. “I’ll miss you.” I sighed, pulling back and grasping her forearms, as she held mine. 

“I’ll miss you too.” 

“Maybe I can come visit?” 

“I’d love that.” Reina beamed. 

I felt her presence then. Aelin. I stiffened, and dropped Reina’s arms to see my mate a few paces away, glaring daggers into Reina, who looked absolutely petrified. 

“Leave.” She ordered my friend, who scurried down the hallway, almost running. 

“She’s my -” I turned and hissed. 

“Not. Here.” Aelin said through gritted teeth, pacing towards me to stop right in front. She wrapped an arm around my waist, gripping tightly and walking back towards - towards my rooms? They were closer I guess. Her touch was laced with pure possession. 

“What -”

“Wait.” She interrupted my sentence again, and I clenched my teeth. Her grip tightened, holding me closer, her fingers digging into my side. That might be a bruise tomorrow. We finally got to my rooms, and I looked to her for an explanation. 

“I can smell her on you.” Aelin’s eyes were narrowed. My mouth opened, but before I could speak she said, “Go take a bath.” 

“Excuse me?” My eyes widened. Is this a real conversation?

“Go take a bath. Her scent is on you.” Aelin tugged at the mating bond, sending her emotions down it. The jealousy. Something with the bond encouraged me to yield, to give in to her will - to please my mate and make her happy. 

I rolled my eyes, but didn’t say another word and spun on my heel, stomping off towards my bathing room. I despised myself for it. 

I ran the water, making sure it was hot, and threw my clothes in the basket. I scrubbed my body down with the rose soap, the one Aelin had got for me after she found it was my favorite. Once my skin was scrubbed pink and my hair washed clean, I dried myself off and focused on keeping my cool. I threw some clothes on. Fleece lined leggings, and one of my favorite long sleeve tops - cut right below my navel, and flowy. A beautiful darker green color - Terrasen green. Apparently my subconscious is doing everything it can think of to please my mate. 

I took a few conscious breaths and stalked back through the door, letting it swing shut behind me. I stopped a few paces ahead of her, and crossed my arms, not bothering to put a pleasant expression on my face. Aelin’s eyes narrowed, but she looked at me almost approvingly. 

“All to your liking, your majesty?” I used the term to tease her. To aggravate her a bit. Based on how her nostrils flared, it worked. 

She circled around me, much like a predator. I felt myself stiffen, a bit of fear creeping in. “Good, I can’t scent her.” She spit out the last word ‘her’, like she was some sort of demon. My shoulders relaxed a tiny bit. Gods, this is ridiculous. 

“She’s my friend.” I exclaimed. “I hugged her because she’s leaving.” I heard her say something under her breath, something suspiciously like if she wasn’t leaving I’d make her, but I chose to ignore that, and pretend it didn’t come out of her mouth. “Am I not allowed to have friends now?” I said sarcastically. 

“Not when I can scent their arousal on you.” 

My jaw dropped. “She’s just a friend.” 

“Have you told her that?” 

“Of course I have.” I swallowed harshly. “I’m needed in the library,” I muttered, walking maybe a bit too quickly out of the room. 

“This conversation isn't over.” Aelin growled from behind me. 

I stopped in the doorway, turning to face her. “It is for now,” and strode out of the room, letting it slam behind me. 

-

Y/n was pissed, and I couldn’t figure out why. Everything was … almost normal, but she avoided touching Rowan and I, shrugging away from any kind of intimacy, and spent more time than usual in the library. I asked the head librarian, who feigned ignorance. I didn’t push the woman for answers, not wanting to cross that boundary. 

After three days, I cracked and asked Y/n. Her mates eyes darkened. “You don’t remember?” She spit out, teeth clenched. 

I fought the urge to laugh at the venom in her voice, completely at odds with her normal demeanor, but I knew it would make the situation ten times worse if I did. 

“Obviously not,” Rowan said, not bothering to hide the amusement in his tone. “Care to fill us in?” 

“You got pissed over me hugging a friend.” 

That’s what this is about. “Her arousal was over you.” I snarked back at her. 

Rowan looked at me, why haven’t I heard about this? 

Slipped my mind. Thankfully, he left it alone for now. 

“It’s not my fault I’m pretty.” 

Rowan stiffened next to me, but Y/n shoved her plate away, stalking out of the room. 

She stayed in her old chambers that night - from when she first came to live with us, and no amount of coaxing from Rowan could bring her back over to ours. 

-

I didn’t sleep well that night, by myself. I’d grown so used to having both of them with me, the three of us tangled up together. Past midnight, I regretted my decision but I wouldn’t go sneaking in there. Part of me knew I was being a bit ridiculous holding on to the grudge. I probably would’ve been pissed smelling someone else's arousal on my mates. 

But, it stung. Part of me couldn’t help wondering if they’d reject me because of it. Maybe they’d think I was somehow ruined? Stupid, I chastised myself. The thought bloomed out of nowhere, rooted in my own insecurities, but it was enough to make me avoid them. 

-

My patience was running out. I wanted to touch her mate, to feel her, to scent her arousal. But - Y/N didn’t start anything, didn’t initiate anything, and I couldn’t figure out why. For Gods sake I even swallowed my pride and apologized to her. So, like a rational person, I brought it up in the middle of dinner, and bluntly. Never one to sugar coat my words. 

“Why are you avoiding intimacy?” 

Rowan’s look said ‘rutting Gods, Aelin.’ 

“I’m scared you’ll reject me. Or laugh at me somehow.” 

That. That was not what I expected. At all. 

“Y/N.” I said her name softly, dinner forgotten as I rounded the table, pulling her chair out so I could kneel in front of her. On my knees - for her. I grasped both of her lands in mine. 

“Petal. I’d never reject you. Or laugh at you. You know exactly what you do to me.” I met her eyes, and trailed a hand up her thigh, up her side. She shivered as much touch ghosted over the side of her neck, all to grip her chin. Rowan had moved, and he was standing behind her now, a steady presence. If she noticed him, she didn’t turn or look away from me, her attention focused wholly on me. Gods, I loved that, being the center of her attention.  

One hand stayed on her chin. Gripping that soft skin, the other covered her chest, right where her heart was. I felt the heat of her skin through her top, and scented her arousal too, starting to creep up through her. I kept the smirk off my face, barely. 

“This is mine.” My voice was low and possessive enough I almost didn’t recognize it. I rose from my knees, standing in front of her. My hand guided her chin, tilting so she’d see me - look in my eyes. Her hands gripped my hips, and she stood with me. “You belong,” I emphasized, “to me.” 

She bit on her bottom lip, and my thumb tugged it free with a rough movement. Harsh. “I would never reject you.” I yanked her up, one hand wrapping around her waist to pull her flush to me. The chair flung out of the way, and she tried to turn but I held her in place. Rowan’s hands trailed over her shoulders and down her side. 

“You belong to us.” He told her, leaning down so his lips ghosted her ear. Eyes meeting mine. 

Our mate. 

Our mate. I repeated to him. 

She shivered, her body reacting to the pure possession in our touch. “Or have you forgotten that?” I teased. 

“You haven’t exactly shown me.” She teased back, even as a bit of fear crept into her. I could scent it too, and for some reason I loved it. “You haven’t either,” she turned her head to face Rowan. He snarled, flashing his canines when she turned back around. 

“You have no idea what you’ve just done.” I said softly, tracing the line of her jaw. 

“I just told the truth.” 

Oh, there’s still a fire in her. 

Our scents are weaker on her. I spoke to Rowan. 

We need to fix that. 

Do exactly what I say. He rolled his eyes, but he gave a short nod. 

-

I traced my hand down the lines and curves of her body, relishing in every soft bit of skin. I kissed my way down, through the valley of her breasts, stopping to leave a mark right in the middle. I loved the way she screamed as I bit into her, and sobbed. She was begging before I’d even touched her pussy, before my hands touched her breasts. 

“Aelin. Gods, Aelin. Please.” Eventually I gave in, licking one long strip up her core, before biting down on her clit, tugging it. Her back bowed, arching as she sobbed. “It hurts.” She whined. Her eyes fixed on Rowan, like he might convince me to let her finish. 

“Don’t look at me.” He said, “I’m enjoying this.” She fixed her gaze on me again, pleading. 

“I don’t care if it hurts.” I whispered, my warm breath fanning her as she shivered. She got even wetter. “My little painslut.” I whispered, rising back up to meet her lips. My knee pressed into her core, and she whimpered into my mouth, her nails scratching down my back. 

“You’re mine.” She moaned, pulling me as close as she could. 

I pulled back just enough to meet her eyes. “I’m yours my love.” And I kissed her, again and again until her lips were bloody and bruised. Her hands squeezed, pinching my nipples, before scratching down my back to squeeze my backside. She craved me as much as I craved her. Our bodies wanted to be together, belonged together. The mating bond thrummed with joy, feeling fulfilled again for the first time in over a week. 

One of my hands pushed at the back of her thigh, pinning her leg up near her chest, before I made my way back down. 

One finger entered, tantalizingly slow, and rubbing circles inside of her, right inside on the spot. My lips wrapped around her clit, sucking hard. She screamed - loud. I hope Rowan has a shield up. I alternated between sucking and grazing my canines over her until she came undone beneath me. 

After that, I didn’t stop. I kept going until she gave me another.

-

It was almost too much, so overstimulated, so much pain mixed with pleasure but I didn’t want it to stop, didn’t want her to leave. I kept wiggling. Her eyes narrowed, before she lifted slightly. 

“Rowan.” She called, “Hold her.” He listened, climbing up on the bed and kneeling behind me, his hard arms caging my body, tugging me tightly into my chest. 

“It’s too much.” I whimpered, my chest heaving. 

“Then safeword.” Aelin demanded. I didn’t, and kept my mouth shut. 

“You’ll take everything she gives you.” Rowan breathed into my ear. “And thank her.” I shivered, his words making the hair on my arms raise. “Do you understand?” 

“Yes. I understand.” My voice shook as I replied.

“Good girl.” 

I yelped as Aelin’s fingers pinched my clit. The already bruised and overstimulated spot. 

“What do you say?” She teased. 

“Thank you.” I said through heavy breaths. 

“My little pain slut, that’s what you are, aren’t you?” She crooned. 

“Yes. Gods, yes.” I sobbed, as she flicked again, before her fingers pinched it. Tears started streaming down my face. 

“So pretty when you cry.” She purred, leaning in. Her tongue lapped one of the tears, before she met my lips again. Rowan’s arms stayed firm around me - I couldn’t move if I wanted to, I couldn’t feel her or touch her, but I pushed against him as much as I could, trying to get closer. His hold is unbreakable, I don’t know why I expected anything else. 

 “Your turn.” She grinned, and met Rowan’s eyes, over my shoulder, hers glazing slightly. Speaking, they’re using their bond. They moved so quickly I was caught in between them, caught off guard as my body was maneuvered. Aelin leaned up against the pillows, and I was between her legs. Her hand fisted my hair, and pushed me down into her. I hooked both of my arms under her thighs, holding on and started absolutely feasting on her. It hadn’t taken me long to figure out exactly what she likes, and I absolutely loved pleasing her like this. I could do it for hours, and she knew that. She’d had me sit under her desk and do it for hours before. Makes work bearable. She’d told me. 

I startled and whimpered as rough hands gripped my hips, yanking them up. Aelin’s hand fisting my hair kept me firmly in place. 

Fingers slipped inside me, stretching. Preparing me. I kept licking her, lapping at her, even as Rowan pushed into me, inch by tantalizing inch. 

-     

And how would you like me to fuck her, milady? Rowan asked his wife, amusement on his face. She thought about it for a second, her hand keeping Y/N firmly in place, moaning at their mates' touch. He knew she’d keep her there for hours, if she was in the mood. Keep her all to herself. 

Slow. But hard. 

He could do that. He pushed himself all the way in, right to his hilt, and Y/N moaned against Aelin, drawing a moan out of her. He pulled out slowly, almost all the way, before slamming right back into her, she cried out and jolted, but kept her head right there. 

-

Gods it was almost torturous, Rowan moving so slowly, yet so harshly, against me. My already bruised and sore pussy. But - I felt Aelin coming undone under me, and I focused on that, redoubled my efforts, even as his cock threatened to distract me. She was close, so close, I could feel it. Then - Rowan’s hand snuck around my hip, right to the apex of my thighs, pushing harshly against it. I screamed into Aelin, and that sent her over the edge. 

Sneaky Bastard. He’d done that on purpose - knowing what the vibrations from my scream would do to her. I could practically feel how pleased he was with himself, as he pulled out of me, Aelin panting in front of me, her hand releasing my hair. 

“Do you trust us?” Aelin asked me, through heavy breaths. 

“Of course.” I said, immediately, almost offended. She glanced at Rowan, who left. “I feel a bit left out.” I grumbled, rising up to my knees. A grin formed on her face, and she gripped my chin, forcing my eyes to stay on hers. I heard Rowan coming back, and tried to turn. 

“Look at me.” She ordered, and I listened. Maybe I shouldn’t have because silky ropes tied my arms behind me. Rowan tossed another length of rope to Aelin, who caught it, and pulled me up towards the headboard, looping the rope in between my hands, and attaching it firmly. I sat on my knees, and watched with wide eyes. The knots were clever, and there was no escaping them - at least without magic. 

“I figured you might need a break.” Aelin crooned as her hands pushed on Rowan’s chest, pushing him down to lay on the bed. She lowered herself on him, and I watched as she rode him, my eyes wide and breathing heavy. I’d never done that … and no, Rowan would never let me. Watching, though. I liked that. 

He leaned up, her arms steady on his shoulders, and his hands gripping her hips, helping guide her on him, lifting all the way up, before slamming right down. She fucked him - hard. Gods, it was mesmerizing. 

-

Rowan could tell Aelin was in her element, and loved every moment of this. Especially Y/N watching, tied up and helpless to do anything about it. He groaned, coming close to finishing, and felt Aelin start to pulse around him. She threw her head back in a moan, rode him through her orgasm, and until he spilled inside her. His gaze turned to their mate, watching with wide eyes, her cheeks flushed, wiggling to try and get some friction or release. 

“Don’t.” He warned her, and she froze, a sheepish smile forming on her face. He lifted Aelin off him, bringing her up to sit on his face. She whimpered on top of him as he licked one long stripe up her pussy. 

[bookocd]

Light as Air

Hi guys this is a Fenrys Fanfic that is set in the aftermath of Kingdom of Ash. I’m literally so excited about this and I have such a clear vision for where this is going to go. If anyone wants to be tagged when I update or has any thoughts for me PLEASE feel free to reach out. 

Summary: Fenrys see’s a powerful fae female after Aelin’s coronation and is given the task of finding her. Only he doesn’t know the secrets and chaos that he is about to unleash upon Orynth and himself. (A longer summary will be provided after this chapter! I just didn’t want to give any spoilers away)

Thank you for reading :)

Links:

Chapter 1

Chapter 2: 

Ever since she was a little girl, she only ever dreamed of two things; a beautiful night sky with different constellations then she had ever seen in Terrasen, and a pair of violet eyes, only a shade darker than her own. She never understood these dreams, but it always felt as though someone was watching her, not in a scary way, but in a safe nurturing way. Like she would always have someone guarding her and giving her direction. 

This past night she had still dreamt of the same stars and darkness, but instead of purple eyes looking back at her, she was staring into eyes of onyx. 

She didn’t understand her sudden need to go back into the city gates and find the golden man and she sure as hell didn’t understand that feeling in her heart, in her soul, that he was also searching for her. That while she was dreaming of his eyes, he may be dreaming of hers. 

Obviously he was a warrior and a male of worth, he was literally blood sworn to the most powerful queen in history. 

What would he ever want with me, she thought to herself as she laid in her small bed. I’m nobody and I will always be nobody. Her insecurities clouded her mind, like a summer storm cloud.

The female looked around and saw just how much of a nobody she was. Her room was actually a hidden cellar, and past the shelves of vegetables and ale, her small bed was in the corner. The bed was for a child, not a fully grown fae female. When she slept at night, she either had to curl up into a ball, knees to her chest, or let everything past her knee go over the end of the bed. There was a small worn dresser with drawers that squeaked when opened, that had all the clothes she owned. Having never learned how sew or stitch, her wardrobe consisted of her fathers pants, which had never been long enough, loose white shirts, which also didn’t fit, and one single hooded cloak. The cloak was a deep navy blue that almost seemed black, and it was the one thing that fit her and the only reason her father had gifted it to her was so she could cover her ears, facial features, and her lean muscular body. It was also perfect for hiding her assortment of knives and other weapons. 

Her father had only ever given her three things: the cloak, her array of weapons, and the skills to fight and always win. It wasn’t just physical fighting either, he educated her until she knew history, mathematics, and science, he made her able to adapt to any situation, he made her witty and able verbally spare with anyone. He did not just gift her weapons, he molded her into one. 

She ran her rough crooked fingers down the soft cotton fabric, and thought about her father. He was a warrior turned scholar, and somehow knew that dangerous times were coming, so he moved himself and his only son, Smyth, along with some of his books into a small cabin. The extensive forests west of Orynth became their home and soon after the female’s home as well.

Pushing out the thoughts of her family and the impeding misery, she tried to figure out what to do next. It was obvious that she needed to wait until the other royals left before she could make her move. With so many powerful people, she would be too much of a threat, a risk, and if she was provoke… Her body shuttered with memories of torn flesh, burnt skin, and silent screams of terror. She willed her hands to stop shaking. 

She would wait until all the royals were gone, then she would go into the city and see if any opportunities presented themselves, and if these opportunities came from the golden male, she wouldn’t be upset. 

—

He had gone into the city and the surrounding areas every day for two weeks. He told Rowan and the others that he wanted to help with the initial rebuilding, while they were working on goodbyes and more diplomatic matters. Lorcan and Elide both did their calculating stares, Aedion coughed while saying “bullshit” which had Lysandra smothering a laugh with her hand, and Rowan pulled him aside and gave him a “stay safe” lecture. 

Aelin caught up to him when he all but ran out of the room. She pointedly grabbed his elbow and forced him to look her straight on. The three blinks she sent his direction, meaning Are you all right, immediately calmed him, but also brought him back into a dark place. He could never lie to her, so he responded with two blinks, No.   

“Are you going to tell me what’s going on in that thick head of yours or do I need to use force.” Aelin’s eyes sparkled with the treat looming in the air. 

He opened his mouth, a deflecting comment on the tip of his tongue, but she interrupted and said, “Rowan told me what you said, about someone else joining the court.” Fenrys’s head whipped toward the door they had just existed and swore he could feel the bastard male in there smiling. 

“Oh don’t get all pissy about it. It’s my gods damned court and I get to decided who joins it.” He knew she was being playful by the light in her face, but he couldn’t help the sharp words as they came out of his mouth. 

“I know that” 

Aelin then moved her hands to her sides and widened the gap between her legs. A fighting stance. She was wearing pants and a loose black top, and her leather boots were stained with mud. 

He didn’t want to fight with her, not with the one person who understood his pain. He didn’t want to push her away. 

Letting out a rugged breath and running a hand down the back of his head nervously, he said, “It’s nothing I just can’t figure out if I think this girl is a threat or one of us”

“One of us?”

“A dreamer.” Clarity finally filled Aelin’s eyes and her body changed from taunt to fluid. She ran forward and put her arms around Fenrys’s neck. He grabbed her and pulled her close with his arms around her middle. 

Hearing a growl, the two turned and found Rowan glaring and baring his teeth. Fenrys couldn’t help, but laugh, even if the result was a fist to the face. Rowan started toward Fenrys, but Aelin ran to him, jumped up, and put her legs around his waist. 

Rowan’s fury washed away into something more heated. 

Aelin turned one last time, “Go find her Fen. This group could use another female, all the males and their territorial bullshit is getting old.”

Chuckling as Rowan poked his queen in the ribs, Fenrys decided it was his time to leave. 

With his fae ears he could just make out what Aelin said to her husband. 

“Oh how I’m going to make you beg after that performance.” The returning purr told Fenrys that Rowan wouldn’t mind that type of punishment. 

—

It wasn’t quite spring, but Fenrys was still sweating. His tan skin glistening in the sun, while nailing boards onto The Tadpole Inn’s roof. The innkeeper, Annie, a sweet human girl who had inherited the inn from her parents, who had both fought and died in the final days of the war. Fenrys had never asked her age, but he guessed she was in her twenties, and with her blond hair tied back into a long elaborate braid, she never shied away from hard work. Fenrys instantly liked her the moment she picked up a shitty wooden hammer and worked along side him, asking him questions, and even telling him to leave when she had mastered what had been taught. 

She was one of those closest to the outer wall, and Fenrys constantly found himself up on the barges. The surrounding area’s were still all a battle ground, scars and all, but the forest and freedom called his name. 

His keen eyes searched and scanned the land in front of him, and then he turned and looked toward the streets of Orynth. In the past weeks, he had found himself getting more and more anxious at being cooped up in the palace. It wasn’t the company, but the confinement. But he would be lying to himself if he said that was the only reason for being out and scanning the winding streets every spare moment. 

A phantom wind lifted his hair, and he turned toward the strange warm breeze.

Fenrys froze. 

The wind was blowing into his face now and it hit him. 

Cinnamon. 

He shifted in a flash of light and ran south, toward the smell. 

Gods he hoped it wasn’t a pastry.

—-

Every time she was in this city, she kept to the shadows. When she was younger it was based on fear, now it was to observe. She kept far away from the palace, from the queen inside it. She didn’t want that yet, she wanted gossip. 

Her father taught her that people always talked, and if you listened hard enough, the truth would always emerge. 

She watched a woman with graying hair and winkles around the cornes of her dark brown eyes, slowly move wet laundry to a clothes line. The conversation with her neighbor included sharp clipped words and it rubbed the female the wrong way. 

“I’ve seen the queen every single day with that male of hers,” she scoffed at the word male and violently gripped her clothing. 

She continued with every word dripping with distaste, “I feel like the fae are going to be her priority, if her choice in companions says anything.”

The female thought out the words and analyzed the tone. The truth came to her fairly quickly: the woman was panicked. Their city and Terrasen, had been in a war and that has effected everything and everyone. She was scared that her and people like her, would be a second thought to their queen. The female didn’t blame the fake distain for the fae males in Aelin’s court, but the thing that did stick out to her was that the woman had seen the queen everyday. 

Those are the actions of a queen who cares, for not just the city she rules over, but the individuals as well. A queen who wants to look within, fix what has been broken, before moving forward. 

She didn’t know what to do with the information, but she had been hearing the same thing all morning. The queen was caring and wise. Someone that could be trusted. 

It was enough.

Looking around at the smiles, even with their city so broken, these people were resilient and they would come back stronger than before. 

Stepping out of the shadows for the first time, in broad day light, the female felt lighter somehow. She had no idea that her good mood translated to her manipulating the wind. All around her the air started to breath and stir, seeming to wake. 

Tomorrow, she decided, I will—

The screaming cut off her thoughts and ended her rare reign of the wind. Unlike others she ran toward the commotion and started to yell at people to get inside. It wasn’t until she saw what was coming down the stone street at a sprint, that she lost her voice. Standing in the middle of the road, it was impossible for her to melt in-between buildings or become a shadow. 

The golden wolf bounded toward her, and the scratching of its elongated claws against the ground was deafening. The muscles on its legs were straining with effort and its coat was near radiant in the beating down sun. 

The wolf stopped mere inches from her, panting and staring into her soul, giving her a clear view of its knife like teeth. The sheer height of the beast sent a shiver down her spine. The near black eyes reminded her…

Blinding light surrounded her with a feeling of warmth. It was too bright for her not to quickly put her hands in front of her eyes as a shield, a shield from the sun like rays. 

A heartbeat later, the light was gone and the female slowly moved her hands down and opened her eyes. 

The golden male was standing in front of her. And he had a shit-eating grin on his face. 

She was in fucking trouble.

[mariaofdoranelle]

Mariaaa, Rowaelin leaving their children at school and Rowan losing it more than Aelin🤭

PD. I'm ready to send more prompts 😂

I LOVE THIS. And send as many prompts as you want!!

Whatever Happens, Don’t Cry

Written for my Drabblefest!

~400 words

⨯ ⁺ ✦ ･ ｡ﾟ⨯ ﾟ♡ ✧* ･｡* ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

“Whatever happens, don’t cry.”

Aelin snorted. “Are you telling that to me or yourself?”

It was a joke, but deep down she didn’t know. Maisie was power-walking ahead of them, carrying her bee-themed rolling backpack herself. Something squeezed inside Aelin’s chest just to think that this bag was nearly as tall as her toddler when the handle was up.

Rowan squeezed Aelin’s hand. “I’m not forcing her to stay if she cries.” He gave her a firm look. “One tear, she’s back home. We can try again next year.”

She squeezed his hand back. “She won’t, okay? Maisie has to learn how to be in school.”

They were soon in Maisie’s designated classroom, the teacher was outside to greet the kids and their parents, while her assistant watched the kids who were already inside.

After greetings and introductions, the teacher turned to Maisie. “There’s some other kids in this room, and we’ll have a lot of fun together, okay?”

“‘Kay.” Then Maisie took her father’s hand and pulled him into the classroom.

“Mais,” Rowan’s voice was pained, and he crouched to be eye-to-eye with his daughter. “your mom and I won’t come in with you, okay? We’ll pick you up in a few hours.”

The little girl patted her dad’s cheek. “Daddy, are you sad?”

“No,” he lied, “it’s just my allergies.”

For Mala’s sake. Aelin pinched the bridge of her nose. Rowan had his back to her now, but she just knew he broke their promise to not be emotional about this in front of their daughter.

Maisie hugged her dad. “Daddy, you can't be here, but I’ll tell you if I discover a new game."

She quickly hugged her mom too, grabbed her bag, and hurried inside the classroom, but stopped at the door’s threshold.

“Bye!” She waved at her parents. “Tell Fleetfoot I’ll be back to play catch.”

And just like that, she was out of their sight.

Aelin caressed Rowan’s shoulder. “Do you need a moment?”

He was staring slack-jawed at the door. “Did you see that?”

“I did.” She pressed her lips together, blinking back tears. “We’re raising a very independent little girl.”

Rowan let out a fond sigh, sneaked a hand around Aelin’s waist and led them out of the school.

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[made-me-deep-blue]

wake me up when it’s all over.

Book: Blades of Light and Shadow

Pairing: Nia Ellarious x F!Elf MC

Prompt: Consequence

Words: 1223

Rating: Trigger warning, violence

Tags: @choicesmaychallenge @kinda-iconic

-

“I will never regret falling in love with you, ever. Even if it means suffering the consequences of doing so, I’ll do it a thousand overtimes in every life we meet, every reincarnation I will be reborn as, in another world where it’s just us...it’s always you.”

-

It was blurry.

Aelin’s vision was blurry, she could barely even get her surroundings right. Her body felt so heavy, she couldn’t even bring herself to her own feet. The female elf gently turned her head to scan her surroundings once the blurriness cleared. 

Mal was decked across the altar and laid somewhere into the dents and cracks of a nearby pillar, holding his bleeding midriff, grunting under his breath. Tyril, winced as he pulled himself across to where Mal supported himself against the wall and started healing the human. Imtura cursed to herself as she helped herself up, only to land on the floor with a yelp of pain. From the looks of it, she wasn’t in that of a good shape like everyone else is.

Aelin’s elven blood isn’t doing her much help either.

She had to hold a squeak in when Nia—or the Dreadlord—held her hand up towards her, and held a phantom hand at Aelin’s neck, letting the elf’s legs dangle in the air.

“Child of Nightbloom,” Nia snarled. It wasn’t cute at all, for your information. “I’ve always despised that bloodline, ever since I learned of Ilta’s mating with that elven princess.” The silence stretched on, only for it to be broken yet again when Nia hurled Aelin across the room yet again like a rag doll.

No cries of pain could be heard, no yelps, no screams. Aelin gritted her teeth and held it all in through every single blow.

“S-Stop it…” Mal rasped. “Kit’s not gonna make it like this…”

Tyril’s eyes softened in agreement.

“A-Aelin...c’mon, ya can make it through this. You’re the only one, who can get through to her…” Imtura said, as her eyes drifted towards the fallen Priestess. It was quiet, a desperate plea at the end of her tongue, but it was enough for Aelin’s elven hearing to pick up those words.

The blonde elf staggered as she got to her feet, the Blade of Sol still glistening by her side. She took heavy steps towards the altar. The Dreadlord must’ve been surprised because Nia’s quicksilver eyes widened as she watched Aelin took one step at a time towards where she stood at the altar.

“Hey, Nia,” Aelin chuckled weakly, “Kind of a mess we got into, didn’t we?”

Inside Nia’s inhabited consciousness, somewhere laid the woman herself, perked up as she heard Aelin speak. “A-Aelin?” Her name came out as a small whisper. “I...It’s you, it’s really you. You...found me.”

Nia yelped as the shadow’s tendrils pulled her further into the darkness when the Dreadlord lashed out at her with a hiss. “Silence, you brat! If you resist any further, I’ll make sure to erase you and make this body my permanent host.”

That made Nia silent, but Aelin and the others heard Nia talking to herself. Because their comrade was still alive...trapped in her own body.

Aelin’s eyes softened, glistening with unshed tears. “I-I’m sorry, for all this.”

“Sorry? What could she be sorry for?”

“This...this fight, somehow it’s family history. Because you know...the Great War in the elven empire, and I’ve never wanted you to be involved in something like this. You’re just...too good, too pure for this world. But I also never want to make you feel like you should be protected all the time. I’ve seen you display your power, and I’ve always been awestruck every time I see you do that.”

Everyone somehow managed to murmur in agreement.

“I’m sorry...that I couldn’t protect you,” Aelin wearily glanced at the limp figure amongst the rubble at the far corner of the north wing. “I’m sorry...that you had to be the one corrupted. I’m sorry that I’m so weak.”

Nia wanted to deny everything that Aelin had said. The elf had protected her all along, and it wasn’t at all, her fault, that Nia was a suitable host for the Dreadlord to inhabit. And Aelin wasn’t weak, she was strong. From where she came from as an amateur adventurer, they came so long together to where they stood. Aelin didn’t deserve to be called weak.

But the Light had something else to notify her about.

Aelin’s breathing was getting shallow by the minute, and being any closer to Nia would only slow down her enhanced recovery rate. Despite the Nightbloom’s bloodline ability which allows one to feed off the darkness, this is...something else.

“T...There’s one thing I will never be sorry for,” Aelin smiled. She had to get the words out before she doesn’t get the chance to anymore. “I will never regret falling in love with you.”

A ripple in Nia’s subconscious. A drop of light that woke Nia up.

“Remember when we first met? I had already thought that you were beautiful on the outside as you were on the inside. I might have flings here and there, but you’re...special. You make me want to commit everything I have for the relationship between you and I. That night that the palace we spent together? It was magical, and I want you to remember that, Nia Ellarious.”

Nia.

Nia Ellarious.

Nia herself had been trying to remember who she was. The Dreadlord’s influence had already taken a toll on her, but that name…

It was an awakening.

Aelin trudged further, where it was only just an inch before their bodies met. The blonde elf ignored the musty and acidic smell rolling off her sickly grey skin, webbed with ink dark veins, and pressed a gentle hand on Nia’s cheek.

“I love you, Nia. I always have. So please...come back, and stay.”

Aelin’s hand slid off her cheek, collapsing at Nia’s feet, the clanging of armour resonating the room.

“N-No…” Tyril groaned.

“A-Aelin…” Imtura rasped.

“Kit!” Mal bellowed with all his might.

-

The Dreadlord chuckled to himself, pleased with the fact that he had wiped out the last supposed surviving member of the Nightbloom family. Until he stopped what he was doing, and turned around slowly.

He instinctively cowered at the light that was starting to grow inside of his host. 

A small orb, which grew and pulsed along with every heartbeat that Nia’s heart made. She had heard Aelin, she finally heard Aelin say those words that she wanted—needed to hear. The shadow tendrils restraining her faded into the light as she landed on her own feet gracefully.

“N-No…” The Dreadlord muttered. “This can’t be...I should have erased you earlier!”

Nia deflected the wave of darkness that was about to collapse onto her with a wave of her hand. This light that she felt inside of her, an ancient power was awakening, it felt like as if she was being embraced by the Light, being blessed with her magic. The sheer power that would bring anyone to their knees.

Nia Ellarious was the one at the pinnacle.

“You assumed that I was compatible enough to be corrupted and took me as your prisoner, and now you’re going to suffer the consequences for doing so.”

-

Author’s note: Hello! I hope you enjoyed reading this piece! There is a mention of a character by the name of Ilta, a Goddess who mated with an elven princess and had many children, thus starting the Nightbloom bloodline. I made a House Nightbloom information page based on my own ideas, and maybe if this gets a ton of likes and reblogs, I’ll post it!

[yellowpeonies26]

Then why don’t we make it official?

Rowaelin Hogwarts au oneshot

Part 2 of this, kinda- you can read one without reading the other

Aelin hated the history of magic lessons and everything that came with it, which was why she sat at the Ravenclaw table in the great hall at breakfast, beseeching Dorian to do her homework for her.

“No, I’ve got my own homework to do and I need to practice with the team for our upcoming game.” What didn’t add was that the Gryffindor quidditch team no longer needed to practice so much anymore since they got knocked out this season so she will have more time on her hands but Dorian wouldn't say it, he was too diplomatic for that. She wished that he had said it so she could refute his claim and say that they were actually going to practice soon to get better in the rain. Despite that, the loss still stung.

Her head rested on a hand, her elbow on the table and a pout on her face. A hum resounded out of her throat, “so, who is this girl you’ve been pining over.”

“Oh, so I refuse to do your homework so instead you pester me, hoping that I’ll change my mind to get you to stop?” He raised an eyebrow and she couldn’t tell whether the smirk playing around his mouth was from embarrassment or amusement.

“I was just making conversation,” she said defensively, ”but if you wanted to change your mind I wouldn’t turn you away.”

Dorian’s sapphire eyes rolled fondly; as they did so often when Aelin was around.

“I’ll just keep hounding you.”

Nehemia came and sat with them, her blue robes matching Dorian’s. She politely asked what they were talking about and when Aelin told her of the subject matter, her eyes averted to the toast in front of her.

Suddenly suspicious, Aelin’s brows knitted together with her eyes bouncing back and forth between her two friends, both of which were acting shifty.

“I won’t interfere if you do this assignment for me.”

Dorian faced her fully and assessed her raised eyebrows and smug features before asking, “how can you interfere if you don’t even know what you're interfering in?”

In answer, she pointed her gaze towards Nehemia and then back to Dorian.

A laugh escaped her friend sitting diagonally across from her, Nehemia’s braids fell behind her shoulders as her head tilted backwards.

“I have to go, I’m tutoring a third year struggling with ancient runes.” Nehemia sent an amused look their way and Aelin forgot to say bye because her mind was preoccupied with trying to organise and make sense of everything.

Dorian seemed inclined to either ignore her or leave himself even though he knew she’d follow after him. She grabbed his sleeve just in case and leaned in so no-one else could listen in.

Of course that was when Rowan walked through the doors and his gaze immediately landed on them, assessing their proximity. In response she gave him a sultry glance and rolled her eyes cheekily at the proprietorial look that he was failing at hiding.

“So it's not Nehemia, then who is it?”

“I might as well do your essay while I'm doing mine, I'm assuming it's the same one.” A blush crept its way onto his cheeks.

“I won’t say anything, I swear.”

He mumbled something. “What? I didn't catch that.”

“Sorscha.”

A pause followed by Aelin’s barrage of questions assaulted Dorian. The final question she asked was, “why didn’t you tell me?”

“I know that you mean well, but if you’d have known so would the rest of the school.”

“Are you trying to say that I can’t keep anything quiet.”

Her thoughts drifted to the broody Slytherin sitting at his house table, inconspicuously watching them from the corner of his eye. She had kept their relationship a secret; sure, she had told Ansel but that didn’t really count.

After a few minutes of her draining every piece of information from Dorian, Aedion called her from where he sat at the Gryffindor table because they were late for practice.

As she walked towards the doors of the great hall, she could see Rowan’s face as he casually conversed with Lorcan beside him. Oh, he was definitely jealous.

Aelin had grumbled the whole way to the quidditch pitch and Aedion was inclined to agree but insisted that the team captain, Ilias, was right in having the team practice in the rain and wind. When Aelin tried to convince him that the conditions were too dangerous, he just said that Quidditch matches wouldn’t be postponed so they needed to learn how to manage. He was a man of few words but the words that he did say were always true.

They were in the air a matter of minutes after getting changed into their Quidditch gear. They flew around, threw some balls, dodged some bludgers and aimed for the golden rings at the end of the pitch: all the usual things really.

Despite the atrocious weather which had only gotten worse while they practiced, AelIn got more and more enthused in the game just as she did with every quidditch match, apart from the ones that had Rowan there distracting her. She was reminded of all the times she and Aedion had played together in a small field with a group of friends as she watched him send a bludger in the direction opposite to her.

She wasn’t used to playing this weather. Sure, Terrasen’s weather wasn’t the best and that’s where her and Aedion used to play but her parents and aunt would always ban them from leaving their sight because they knew that they would get on their brooms as soon as they turned their backs.

Something hit her side just as she lunged for the quaffle Ansel had thrown her. Mikhail had hit a bludger and the force had sent him swerving into Aelin’s side. She tried to regain her control of her broom but it was slippery in the rain.

The next thing she knew, she had toppled off her broom completely and looked up to see Mikhail trying to catch her, his hand grazing her arm.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Miss Galathinius, can you hear me?” Madam Hafiza was leaning over her, attempting to rouse her from the half-conscious state she was in.

The only response she could give was the full opening of her eyes and a groan that came out louder than she intended.

The matron, Hafiza, had trained in the legendary medical school, the Torre Sesme and gave up a job teaching there to come and practice at Hogwarts instead.

After doing a few tests, madam Hafizaexplains that she only sustained a few broken bones and a mild concussion because of the height she fell from. It wasn’t very high because Ilias had taken some of the team’s concerns into consideration and told everyone to purposefully fly low and only to exceed the limit he set to score goals. She thanked the gods that it wasn’t a higher drop because her injuries would have been a lot worse.

“Would you like your friends to come in, they’re waiting outside.”

“Uhh, yeah, let them in.” She was still groggy because of the concussion.

The next thing she knew, Aedion came barrelling through s though he had been waiting expectantly right in front of he door the whole time.

“Are you okay?” Madam Hafiza recounted all of her injuries which Aelin was glad for because her head pounded even more when she spoke.

He let out a sigh of relief and the others came trailing in after him, slightly less alarmed. Mikhail tried to apologise for knocking her off her broom, Ilias tried to apologise for insisting that they practice in weather so dangerous and everyone practically tried to apologise for not catching her but Aelin shut them all down. It wasn’t anyone’s fault. She should have been more aware of her surroundings; it was always the one thing she could be faulted for.

A while later, some of the others had left but Ansel, Aedion, and Nesryn remained chatting with her. She’d have to stay overnight so madam Hafiza could monitor her bones’ progress with righting themselves with the help of the tonic she had to take. She also supposed that another reason she had to stay was because the tonic tasted so nasty that she wouldn’t have taken it if she didn’t have the matron watching over her every time.

“I think we should probably go now, you’ve got a lesson haven’t you Aedion,” he tried to protest but Ansel carried on, ”and Aelin needs to rest.”

Again, Aedion tried to protest but Ansel dragged his hulking frame towards the exit, only letting him return to give Aelin a hug before he left. The others said goodbye and Aelin was left wondering why she had wanted everyone to go so abruptly.

She found out why though when she looked towards the second door, the one furthest away from her bed. Rowan was standing there, a bunch of flowers in hand.

She should have already known that half the school already knew about her accident but despite the thought making her want to groan, couldn’t hold in her huge grin at the sight of Rowan standing there, waiting so he could see her, check if she’s alright. Aches and pains forgotten, Aelin laughed inwardly to not alert the others who were almost at the door. She wondered how long he had been standing there because if he had come in, it would have aroused suspicion and a constant glare from Aedion, maybe even more than a glare.

“How are you?” Concern graced his features and his tone.

She rattled off her list of injuries and added a, “but i’m fine” on the end at his still worried face.

He let out a breath of both relief and frustration. “I hate having to hide that we love each other.”

“You love me.” It must have slipped out due to his mixed emotions and she delivered her response as both a question and a statement, with a hint of teasing yet seriousness at the same time.

Undiluted panic crossed Rowan’s face, something that he would never let anyone else see. “Yeah, I do.” Then almost as an afterthought he said, “and I know that you love me too so don’t bother trying to tease me.”

Unbridled joy overtook her features; her eyes crinkled and mouth lifted so much that her cheeks ached. “Then why don't we make it official.”

His expression now mirrored hers. “It was your idea to keep it a secret in the first place, you should make the decision. Though I would like to be able to scare off any other guys who get too friendly.”

Aelin rolled her eyes but it was half-hearted because she was just too happy to feel anything else. She knew he was jealous of her and Dorian in the great hall.

Aedion was going to have a tantrum for a couple of days, maybe even a couple of weeks. Not to mention, the rest of the quidditch team; they see him as a rival, someone to keep far away from the inner workings of their team. But they’d get over it eventually and at the end of the day, Rowan and herself could be open about their relationship so it was worth it. And she believes that she was entitled to more than a few PDAs(public displays of affection) after all this time, especially in front of Rowan’s friend Lorcan who already hates her.

“Then yes, I think it’s time, but you have to leave Dorian alone.”

At this, Rowan rolled his eyes but agreed while leaning down and placing a soft kiss on her lips.

[highqueenofelfhame]

if i had a soul to steal // 4.21 // thirteen.

From the second she heard the door open, her hand reached for the gun she knew lay on the nightstand, then disappeared back under her pillow. Thought it was likely it was just Rowan, she couldn’t be too careful and she had learned that the hard way.

Like the time she thought it was Rowan and spent a handful of minutes fighting for her life only to be taken and tortured for seven years. 

A heavy body dropped onto the bed beside her and she knew two things immediately: the first was that it definitely wasn’t Rowan. Never had he ever woken her up like that in their entire relationship. The second was that she didn’t have time to think up another plan, because with such a rude awakening anyone would be immediately awake and complaining. So instead of taking even a second to consider her options, she whipped her hand from beneath the pillow and slammed it into the face of whoever took up Rowan’s place in bed. 

A voice she recognized swore and, because she couldn’t trust anybody right now, she scrambled to get out of bed, and about halfway through the notion she realized just how injured she still was. The immediate and quick movement sent a sharp, searing pain to the wound that was barely beginning to heal in her side and having overshot the distance to get out of bed, she slammed to the floor. Aelin had no control over the series of curses that spilled from her mouth and instead pushed herself to her feet. One hand went to the wound, the other rose to point a gun at the trespasser. 

Fenrys Moonbeam rolled off the bed and moved around to stand in front of her, one hand raised in surrender and the other raised to his temple. 

“I thought you were supposed to be crippled. Shit. Not to mention, weren’t you a hell of a lot more mellow?” It was then that he opened his eyes to look at her and his eyes widened at her appearance. 

Risking a moment, Aelin shifted her gaze from his bleeding temple to the too-warm and suddenly damp spot at her side and she groaned. Blood was soaking through the white shirt that she wore and just as she looked back up to Fenrys to grill him to find if he could be trusted or not, the front door slammed into the wall and footsteps were pounding through the cabin. Fenrys mumbled another swear word, likely knowing that Rowan was going to kick his ass when he found the compromising position the two were in. This was going to be worse than any prank Aelin and Fenrys had ever played on him, because in none of those pranks did it look like Fenrys was responsible for stabbing the life out of his wife. This reality, however, did. 

“What the fuck is going on here?” 

“Before you go getting all stabby or shooty, she did that to herself. I merely sat down in bed—”

“I would not classify what you did as sitting down in bed,” Aelin hissed, but it was hard to keep her lips from tugging up at the corners. She had hardly seen the golden brother since her return, and until five minutes ago, had missed him. 

“—and she freaked out and fell out of bed. I’m not sure what happened while she was on the floor.”

“She has a two-inch stab wound held together with string, you moron,” Rowan shoved him out of the way and made for Aelin, “and you’re just letting her stand here?”

“You broke the godsdamn door in before I could help her!” This time, Aelin did smile, and nodded slightly to tell Rowan it was the truth. It didn’t help the situation at all, Rowan still carefully deposited her back onto the bed and raised her shirt and began quick work of inspecting her wound to figure out how bad she had managed to hurt herself. 

It was pretty bad, apparently, because he gave her a look sharp enough to deepen the wound altogether. Aelin merely shrugged.

~*~ 

After a very loud, very heated discussion, it was determined that Fenrys was no more a threat to Aelin than Rowan was. Fenrys and Aelin had always shared a special bond, the kind that best friends do where they would lay everything down for the other. It was a deep, but purely platonic, love that could not be wavered. Even by an assumed death, or a gash to the temple. 

It was halfway through that discussion when the conversation had turned from Fenrys to Aelin. Aelin, who was sitting at the table across from her conspiracy board and staring intently at the strings and blurred letters that she could hardly decipher, but it had been pertinent to get it all down while she was remembering things so freshly. 

“I want you to take me back to the cabin,” she had said, referring to the cabin she’d been found in, ignoring the shouting between Rowan and Fenrys, not particularly caring if they were listening. She had hardly noticed when they stopped yelling at each other and spun to look at her like she was absolutely out of her mind. 

Maybe she was. Maybe she was losing it, or had already lost it, or maybe since being pulled out of that tank in a cement basement she’d never really had it together at all. 

“Absolutely not,” Rowan said flatly, his voice an icy chill down her spine that didn’t register as much as it should have. 

“It’s not a request.” Where Rowan was all ice, Aelin was all fire. His ears burned at her words and they made his mouth dry with ash. Taking her back to the cabin was a huge risk and one he wasn’t so sure he was willing to take. Was anything worth risking her safety? Was it worth the risk of her getting arrested? Or taken from him in any capacity? “You can take me yourself or I can turn myself in under the single condition they take me there first.” The golden core of her eyes seared into him, burning holes where his eyes ought to be. Damn her. 

The answer was a huge and resounding no, one he didn’t have to even think about. But there was also no getting around her demand. When Aelin wanted something she got it by any means necessary. He knew that her threat to go by police or taxi were not empty, and at least if he was with her he might have some sort of control on the situation. 

It was how the three of them ended up in the Jeep Fenrys had driven in on the way to the place that Aelin had been found.

~*~

Nothing. 

There was absolutely nothing that told her a single damn thing about the person that had kidnapped and kept her hostage here. There was nothing on the walls, nothing in the now-empty tank, nothing washed halfway down a drain that told her anything of what happened here.

The things she couldn’t remember were still forgotten, the words and images choked down somewhere between her throat and stomach dying to get out with no release. There was still an empty space where a face should have been in her mind of the person that had brought her food or water or had beaten her until she was bruised and bloody and resembled little more than bleeding pulp. 

The only clues left behind were the drops of blood that had been processed by the bureau weeks ago upon her discovery, all of which had apparently belonged to Aelin. 

It was frustrating to say the least, that the only place she could remember being harbored no leads, no information. There was nothing here that wasn’t in her head. The only difference was that her hands were shaking harder than they did when she woke from her dreams. 

In an attempt to calm herself, to ground herself somewhere to the world, she rest her forehead against the cold, concrete wall and closed her eyes. One of her hands had her fingers splayed wide against the wall and the other was soon encapsulated by Rowan’s warm fingers that seemed to thaw her out and bring her down from whatever panic was trying to claw its way out. 

His touch reminded her that there was a door behind them, with stairs that led up and out. She was not trapped here. Nothing was keeping her here. Nothing could keep her with Rowan and Fenrys behind her. Rowan’s broad hand on her lower back had her lifting her head to look at him and she merely shook her head once. 

“There’s nothing here.” There was a resigned sigh in her voice, and Rowan leaned forehead to rest his forehead against her temple, nose grazing the side of her face, her jaw. Lips pressed beneath her ear, to her hair. “I needed to find something here.” 

But she didn’t. So when Rowan tugged on her fingers to lead her away, she let him. 

~*~

They thought she was sleeping. Aelin, with her head in Rowan’s lap in the back seat while Fenrys drove back toward their cabin and his fingers scratching at her scalp to soothe her. Eyes closed, her mind was wide awake so when Fenrys explained to Rowan that Lorcan was wavering in her innocence, she heard everything. 

Knowing she had never been his favorite person was one thing, but the fact that Lorcan was open to the idea that she was a murderer, had potentially kidnapped herself and was a danger to society was another thing entirely. Aelin couldn’t believe that anyone who knew her on such a personal level would ever even contemplate that she would leave Willow and Rowan behind. 

Willow. Her heart ached with a ferocity she was becoming all too familiar with. With every beat she felt like she was losing the life in her, the irony being that she had just gotten it back. But for how long? She was running out of time. She was a fugitive. Rowan was breaking so many different laws. Fenrys was breaking dozens of them. Everyone putting everything at risk for her and she couldn’t stand it. What would come of Willow, growing up in a world where her mother was a murderer? Where her mother was crazy? 

After what felt like ages, they pulled into a diner. It wasn’t quite in the middle of nowhere, but not in the hub of the city. It was somewhere they had brought Willow to when she was young, but not the same place Rowan had met Lyria. After Rowan mussed her hair and tugged a hat over her head, she wasn’t quite as recognizable. Aelin still lacked color in her face from the injury she bore, and with sunglasses on her nose to hide her brilliant blue eyes there wasn’t anything extraordinary about her.

Upon entering, they sat in a booth near a window. Aelin’s stomach grumbling so loudly it was almost comical. It was a risk, stopping to eat, but after Aelin’s constant insistence Rowan gave up and told Fenrys to pull off at the next stop. 

“Chocolate pancakes with strawberries, please,” she requested, handing off her menu before turning to lean into Rowan’s side. On the other side of the booth, Fenrys watched her closely. 

“You’ve looked better, I gotta say,” he drawled, eliciting a short from the golden blonde. Aelin didn’t have to look at Rowan to see his eye roll. She could feel it. 

“That bruise looks lovely on your face,” she crooned back, burrowing cold fingers beneath Rowan’s shirt. Fenrys laughed then earned a glare from Rowan that silently told him to keep it down. 

Their midnight dinner went smoothly, no hiccups, no police being called on the most wanted criminal in the country. It wasn’t until they were leaving, when her shoulder crashed with another set of broad ones that she was recognized. 

“Laena?” 

Something in her head throbbed, the nickname jerking her back several decades while she looked up into the too-handsome face of Archer Finn. 

Laena. The nickname gifted to her at the orphanage she stayed in for the year before the government managed to locate her Ashryver family, before they could get the adoption details in order. 

“I’m sorry,” Rowan said. “I think you have the wrong person.” He guided her back to the car, but she couldn’t stop the glances she sent over her shoulder. 

Faces of two young boys that she had played with, long since forgotten and buried under a mental suppression so black she had forgotten they existed at all. 

@starseternalnighttriumphant​ @musicmaam​ @city-of-fae​ @empire-of-wildfire​ @the-regal-warrior​ @schmlip-scribble​ @kandasboi​ 

idk guys i’m trying to be better at tagging but i dont have the mental energy and i’m lazy lmfao

[rayonfrozenwings]

Hey mutuals, followers and p0rn bots, 

Its my blogs 3rd birthday! 

I’ve been lurking, posting, ranting in the SJM fandom on tumblr for three years and that’s kinda Crazy to me. 

So here are some fun Facts that kinda evolve into an appreciation post… and then an anecdotal history of this fandom I’ve been a part of. So thanks for hanging round and talking shit with me. :D

if ur tagged it’s just like a thanks or when I met you - lol you don’t have to read the whole thing... 

and the rest is under the cut.... 

I only liked posts for the First month, I never reblogged. It was my first time on tumblr.

I’ve had the same URL since the start

The first post I reblogged and commented on was @miladyaelin ‘s post about a Volcano in the Frozen Wastes - such a wasted opportunity for World destruction that was not used to full potential at all in KoA hahaha - maybe a spin off series? joke.

The first person to reply to one of my asks was abookandacoffee or @bookofmirth 3 months after I joined tumblr and that’s kinda scary because that means we have been speaking longer than we realised. 

@propshophannah​ thanks for letting me go nuts about theory with you!

The Big blogs in the SJM fandom change, and it's cool that being in the fandom for so long means that I get to talk with all these people and make some real friends.

I made read friends from reading books and talking about them - How Cool Is That!

I had fun making shit posts about Dorian’s couch, Rowan’s relationship status after EoS and seeing my friends come up with some pretty clever memes too. 

The Art is amazing, and actually getting to talk to artists about their art is something I didn't think would happen ever. So I’m so grateful to tumblr for that.

I want to tag a lot of people but - having been here so long means that urls change and I lose touch - plus I think I would go over the “50 tag limit” easily. 

The first kiwi blog who I talked to was @verifiefangirl and we bonded over the Old El Paso advert of “why not both”. 

I want to thank those who encouraged me to write my theories, and I did that for the first year on here. 

I want to say thank you to the people who told me “You know, you can write your theories as fic and people don't get as angry.” Because you were right! And so that started my writing of fan fic, and thank you to those people who wanted to be tagged and let me know what was up - sorry I haven’t written in a while. 

Thank You to @faenet and my Faenet Fam. I joined to share theories, switched it up to write fic, and then evolved into Edits. I was able to learn how discord works and be a part of a team and learn new photo editing skills - I knew nothing before I joined and it's so cool to have become a part of that community.

Thanks to my BookClub brotp - It’s been the best getting to know you all over the last year, discuss books and life. And just have fun. I honestly wouldn't have connected with you guys if we just relied on tumblr because it often requires me to say something first, and i'm not good at that. @theyretheirthere​ sorry I had to tag you twinnie. :P 

Some Fandom History for those who have been here a while ... (well for as long as I have been in the fandom, I know there was a time before this).

Phase One - POST EOS Theory and Beach Scene Debate, Elorcan exists now even tho People still HATE Lorcan (not me but lots of people did). ACOMAF love, nickname of Tam the tampon takes off. 

Phase Two - PRE ACOWAR, Moreil Hype, Fandom super excited, Acomaf love, Rhysand love.

Phase Three - ACOWAR IS AWFUL - Dumpsters on Fire, lots of fandom people left. The ones who stayed had discourse about Moriel, Mor’s sexuality, Nessian, the ending and how it was rushed, Azriel is a smol cinnamon roll who deserved better - lots of Az fics and the birth of Elriel started here. 

Phase Four - TOG FANDOM ARE MAD because Chaol’s novella turned into a Novel. Cyber bullying of Chaol lovers in fandom led to a lot of blogs leaving - just be kind to one another, you can talk about stuff without personal attacks.   

Phase Five - WE ARE ALL GOING STIR CRAZY, Someone released a TOD mock cover and there was a lot of ableist stuff going on. Bad time in fandom. 

Phase six - TOD Came out - Lots of people refused to read, other people felt vindicated about theories, other people were shocked about Maeve. Praise and Hate towards the book and for how SJM handled race and disability. Was she being sensitive or appropriating? Mixed Reviews, again fandom got a little smaller. Acotar Fandom was taking off in terms of fics. 

Phase Seven - Acotar Fandom PRE ACOFAS Fan Fic Mania. Most of us re-read acotar, acomaf, acowar and Fix-it fics, Nessian Fics, Feysand Fics, Lots of Fics. Lots of Art. I noticed the ACOTAR fandom kinda took off while the TOG one floundered.

Phase Eight - A New Novella for ACOTAR, ACOFAS - lots of hype. Lots of mixed reviews - “it had no plot” or “I love it” or “I don't like how the first pov changed depending on the character” or “Yay christmas!!!” or “boo wall scene” or “yay Wall scene!!” Again - more fics and art came from it. Snowball fight was a highlight, art was gorgeous, Amren as a snowball was also good. Fandom was flourishing again, yes we lost some people but we also had a resurgence in creative content.

Weird non-phase - Catwoman: Soul Stealer, was released but wasn't a “must read” for many people.

Phase Nine - Pre KoA, Fandom was Hyped! We were all doing our re-reads, theories came out again, discussions about favourite quotes of things we had forgotten were shared. Again - Some good ToG fic came out because people had it fresh in their minds again  - we were preparing. Edits were great, lots of Edits, Lots of Art. 

Phase Ten - KoA Came out and destroyed us. Fandom was relatively quiet while people abandoned tumblr to read it. Anti’s came out in force, they had more to say about it that the fans did. Fans didn't see this immediately because they weren't on tumblr. About a month after release, We got Meta and discourse on KoA and what it means and what Aelin’s story has meant to us personally. Edits started taking off again. This Phase is still ongoing even a year later. Personally I am in Awe of that book and what it managed to achieve, I wanted to re-read it straight away but it still has so many parts that HURT to read. 

New people slowly trickle into fandom, or pick up the books, its sweet, but as a veteran sometimes seeing the same arguments gets tiring and so I dont comment as much as I used to. I’m still here reading, but I don't really want to write another essay like the ones I've previously written to defend a point so i’m quiet. 

Where I think it will go next? 

Most of the people who remain in the fandom are good at looking at things with a critical eye but saying “I can still enjoy a book”, which I like. 

We will get hyped as a fandom for Crescent City which was pushed back to March 2020, even if we are unsure it’s what we want, I don't think we can help ourselves. 

ACOTAR 4 is in the works with no confirmed release date, just vague mention that it was being pushed back - twas supposed to be 2020 but I'm doubtful, especially if other titles are pushed back first like CC:HOEAB - it was by three months from Jan to March. 

WOTOG was also pushed back, first from release with EoS, then from release with ToD and now from release with KoA (those are all goodreads dates as I was waiting for it and keeping an eye out, but we also had novels added and other books like acofas - goodreads also isn't the best at staying on top of release dates)…. we have had mention of it that it will include art and is co-authored by Lynette Noni, so It is still being made at least - I mean I don't have to cry about it being cancelled just yet. And So I have to stay around for those. I became invested in the World building of TOG to not wait for WOTOG. 

So yeah, it’s been a wild 3 years. <3