#let’s make our own computer chips how about

[bibleofficial]

if trump actually does put tariffs on fuckin everything that could be very good for america in the long run tbf

[flowerfreya]

Best 3/4

Part 9 of the office AU

Masterlist

The boys figured that they need to lay off reader and the best way to do that is to back with their ex (boys are dumb)

Pairing : Poly!141 x reader

A/n: sorry there’s a lot of Simon x reader , he’s my comfort character and my fav trope is I har everyone but you and he gives that so much. I’m not the best writer so I have trouble with flow sometimes so bare with me

You’ve been working for 141 industries for about 2 months now, it’s nice to have your own. Own money, your own car, and your own apartment. You think that the boys have gotten back with their ex, and that is making you feels some things that if you didn’t care you shouldn’t feel.

Their ex only seems to like all of them except for Simon , he seems almost like an afterthought to her. She rolls in the office, always leaves the front door open and just waltzes into John’s office , without even an ask to see if he’s in a meeting.

“I’m sorry ,he’s in a mee-”, she interrupts you with a wave and a fake smile, goes in and shuts the door and closes the blinds. You huff out a breath and look up to see Simon staring at you , letting out a small shrug. Simon and you both stand up, it’s lunch time. Everyday at the same time , you get up and eat lunch , whether that is in the breakroom or getting something to eat at a fast food place. Simon started joining you a little over two weeks ago, you noticed that Simon doesn’t really bring lunch just eats shit out of the vending machine.

You started making and packing extra food for him.

“I have extra food today, if you want some”, you sit down at the same table next to him.

“`M good”, as he opens a bag of chips.

“Please just eat, I always make too much food”, shoving the food towards him. He gives you a look and you give him a small smile and nod your head towards the food.

“So, how long have you guys been dating”, you wave your hand in a you know who gesture.

He makes a hum noise, “who?”

“The women in Price’s office” .

“Oh,I guess our girlfriend”.

“She doesn’t seem to like to hang out with you”

“Yeah, well I’m not the best guy”.

“I beg to differ”, you think that Simon is the nicest guy you’ve met. He helped you when he really didn’t have too and likes to eat lunch with you and appreciates your food too.

You hear a shrill , “Receptionist”,she can’t even remember your name. She kind of slaps the table like she’s hitting a bell. You see her just standing there , waiting for you.

“Yes”

“I need you to clear John’s schedule for tomorrow afternoon”

You turn to look at John in office with the door shut, focused on his computer,”Uhh does John now about this”, you question.

“Of course, sweetie”, she is using her fake customer voice , you know because you are using it too.

“ I think, I’m going to ask him , just in case”, you start to move in the direction of his office. No way he really wants to clear his schedule, you’ve never seen him take lunch. A whole afternoon off, no way.

You knock as you push the door open, “Hi, Mr.Price, just trying to fig-”,

“Not now”.

“Oh well I was-”

He looks up then with a harsh brown and a closed mouth speaking through his teeth , “Not now”.

It shocks you, he’s never talked to you like that but you have been talked to like that a lot. Your natural response is to quiet down and get out the way. You quietly back out the room and sit back down at your desk.

You look up at her still waiting for you to clear the schedule, “I guess it’s fine”

“Wonderful” , she has such a wide smile and is so pretty. You think you hate her.

“Opps almost forgot”, she walks to Soap and gives him a big kiss and you can definitely see tongue. You want to look away but you can’t help it , it’s enticing. She lets out a little giggle and wipes her mouth and then saunters out the door.

Simon is sitting there, no kiss received, and is staring at you.

[lifblogs]

Do You Not Trust Me?

Day 4 of Neurodivergent Tech Week Prompt: "Do you not trust me?" "Absolutely not. Next question." @neurodivergent-tech-week

Rating: General Audiences Word Count: 1460 Summary: Crosshair decides to go with Clone Force 99 after the destruction of Kamino. Tech wants to scan for an inhibitor chip, just to be safe. READ ON AO3

Tech was adding just a few touches to his scanner, his body tense because of who sat across from him near the hyperdrive computer, hands bound.

Crosshair let out a huff, hanging his head.

“Do you not trust me?” he asked, knowing the nature of the scanner Tech was working on.

Tech’s solder sparked blue into the ship.

The others were busy, leaving Tech to his business with Crosshair. In truth, he was only doing it out of curiosity, though he was ordered to by Hunter, but given the situation…

“Absolutely not,” he stated quite easily. “Next question.”

“I see you still have your sass.” Crosshair’s voice lacked the usual hissing strength to it. He was clearly ashamed from asking them to help him off Kamino.

“As do you, I’m sure.” Tech lowered the scanner. “It’s not just about trust,” Tech said. “You know I have to verify this.”

Crosshair let out another huff, leaning back in his seat, and stretching out his long legs.

Tech pulled his legs in.

“Hunter wants you to verify it, to see if I’m lying.”

Ugh. “Crosshair, what reason have you given us to trust you? You lured us to Kamino at the Empire’s orders, you shot your own squad”— Crosshair turned away; perhaps at the fact that the Bad Batch was no longer his squad?—”you told us you believe in the Empire, and are loyal to them, and then you ask us to get you off Kamino despite your own pride, but since then you have not made your allegiance clear.”

Tech finished with the scanner, and set his tools aside.

“There, all done.”

“Tech, I know you. I know you like to look at every side, like to understand as much as you can about—about everything, really. Now look at the other evidence.”

“Why? Will you be staying with us, or is your loyalty to those who destroyed our home more important to you?”

Tech stood, and tried scanning Crosshair, but he stood too, shoving him. Tech shoved back.. Perhaps their altercation was too loud because Hunter noticed, exiting the cockpit in a rush, and getting in between them. Crosshair snarled when he pulled them apart.

“Stop it. Both of you. Crosshair, sit down.”

“Make me.”

“How old are you?” Hunter asked.

“Fine,” Crosshair growled, taking a seat. “But I’m only listening to you so I actually make it to my destination.”

“We’re not the ones who want you dead,” Hunter said. “Think about that.” He turned to Tech. “You’re all right here? You can handle him?”

Guilt struck Tech for a moment as his hand just brushed against one of his blasters holstered at his hips.

“Of course.”

“Good, now check if he still has his chip.”

“I don’t,” Crosshair swore.

“Then what’s the harm in the scan?”

“You wouldn’t understand,” Crosshair told him.

Tech cleared his throat, going over in his head what he wanted to say. He should say it now. No, no… Now! Hmm, maybe it needed some tweaking.

Hunter, may I speak with you? I believe you are riling Crosshair up. I can handle him.

Yes, that was perfect.

By the time he had his script, Crosshair was in Hunter’s face.

Oh no, was he too late?

He still had to try.

Tech cleared his throat again, getting at least Hunter’s attention (Crosshair was still sneering at Hunter). “Hunter,” he started, worried his voice was coming out too loud (not like he could change that at the moment; there was just too much to think about), “may I speak with you?”

Hunter drew his attention from Crosshair, which seemed to take a mighty effort. Tech didn’t blame him.

“Fine, but I’m gonna keep an eye on him.”

“That is preferable,” Tech said, breaking his script, and finding the rest of the words falling away from him as the connection broke.

Scrag.

“So what is it?” Hunter asked.

How am I supposed to say it now?

Just try.

You have to try.

Tech tried to ignore the sudden anxiety in his gut at finding the right words, and said, “I believe you are riling Crosshair up. Clearly he is distressed by your presence.”

“And he isn’t by yours?”

“He is, but to a lesser extent. I believe this will go more smoothly if I handle it on my own.”

Hunter eyed Tech, and then Crosshair. He looked back at Tech, and Tech dodged his gaze, looking at his eyebrows instead, and the dark ink of his tattoo.

“Fine, but holler if you need help.”

Hunter went back to the cockpit, and the door opening earned Tech a glance at Omega peeking through, curious as always. Besides, she seemed willing to forget Crosshair’s transgressions.

AZI was in the cockpit as well, making it more crowded. He had volunteered to check if Crosshair still had his chip, but Tech wanted to see it for himself, with his own tool.

“Glad Hunter decided I don’t need another babysitter,” Crosshair hissed out as Tech came back over.

“Perhaps I was the one who didn’t want him around.”

“You? Aren’t you all one big, happy family?”

“No,” Tech stated. “I fear we are missing a piece.”

They went silent.

“Please, let me scan you.”

“Fine,” Crosshair relented. “As long as your stupid machine doesn’t touch my head.”

“It won’t.”

Still, Tech held in a wince as he scanned Crosshair, getting a closer look at his scar.

“Did that require skin grafts?” he asked.

“I don’t see how that’s any of your business. You don’t trust me, remember? So I don’t trust you.”

“I miss the time when we could trust each other,” Tech admitted, voice perhaps more monotone than he had intended.

“Just finish your stupid scan.”

Tech did, and… no inhibitor chip. He felt a strange lightness in his chest that Crosshair had been telling the truth.

But then that meant he had been telling the truth about his loyalty to the Empire as well, which then felt like a stab in the gut.

“It appears you were not lying,” Tech managed to get out.

“As if I didn’t already know that.”

“You want to be left alone,” Tech stated, still knowing Crosshair despite him being an enemy now.

To his surprise, Crosshair paused.

Tech almost sat back down, even twisting his hips to do so.

“Yes.”

Crosshair was lying. Tech knew it like he knew how to fly the Marauder, knew it like he knew that a venomous twirfang didn’t actually need its venom to kill its prey, knew it like he knew the sound of a purrgil about to jump to hyperspace.

Tech left him to his lie, wondering if he would ever look back at his recording of that moment.

Despite how crowded it was in the cockpit, Tech felt devastatingly lonely. He wondered if Crosshair felt this way. But there was no way to fix it, not unless Crosshair took the first steps.

Tech sat in the pilot’s seat, silent, brain trying to script what he could say to Crosshair to fix this, but there was no script for this pain, no script for what Crosshair had done to them and had tried to do, no script for what they had done to Crosshair, no script for the sheer encompassing malice and enormity of the Empire.

Tech, unable to sit still with his frustrating helplessness, continued work on one of his many projects, telling the others about it till they were annoyed, and past that. Though, Wrecker smiled at him through it, and Echo did seem interested for quite some time. Same with Hunter and Omega. But he knew he was too much sometimes. They listened anyway. Annoyance didn’t change anything about love. Tech was glad that after twenty minutes they at least pretended to listen; perhaps they had been doing it all along, not understanding what he was working on. He valued the questions Omega asked, and valued that they let him speak as long as he wished.

Yet Crosshair sat just outside the door, alone.

Would he have listened to Tech for some time as well? Had he tried to listen in?

Tech resisted the urge to check on him. Echo was handling that—Echo, who understood being used by an enemy to hurt his own brothers. Perhaps something would come of this.

His mind played over and over again, Do you not trust me?

Crosshair hadn’t tried to take their weapons, hadn’t hurt any of them once Kamino had been fired upon, and he had saved Omega. The evidence before Tech painted a confusing picture, one he would want to puzzle out, teasing out the knotted strands until everything was right again.

Do you not trust me?

Yes, yes, I do trust you.

[slashingdisneypasta]

Squip x Reader || Drabble

Plot: You boldly admit that you wanna be with your Squip, and 'he' struggles to face his own... 'feelings'.

Warnings: The Squip is RUDE.

"-I dont want any guy at my school, I want you!" The words fly out of your mouth before you can have any say in the matter, buy you don't back down; maintaining a serious look on your face directed at the SQUIP.

All day he's been pestering you about going on a date, or hooking up - it's college culture, after all. And people enjoy it! - and you had reached your boiling point. Every guy that he suggested was disgusting, you didn't like any of then. You knew you wouldn't. You've never been interested in guys your own age,.. or who are nice,.. or your own species-

If you could even call the SQUIP a species, anyway. He was a computer. A very, very smart one who seemed... at times... to have feelings. Mostly irritation and pride but feelings all the same. That gave you hope.

You recognise how dumb your having hope was but, well, you couldn't help it.

You also don't get how Squip didn't see it in you, he has access to everything - your every thought, - but he never let on that he had any idea of your feelings toward him. Maybe he was trying to ignore it? That would sure make sense.

"... excuse me?" The Squip's voice is deadpanned while his face looks unamused, and dubious, and about a million other things you never want to see the guy you like look at you with when you tell them, and it makes you roll your eyes.

"You heard me." You don't have to repeat yourself to him! The asshole.

"You're being irrational." He sighs eyes rolling upwards into his skull. Then he rolls his shoulders, shakes his head in disappointment, and regains his composure; twisting his cufflinks that are always perfectly anyway considering he's a computerised image. "Honestly, if your period wasn't coming up in two days then I'd say you were crazy."

Jaw dropping, you suddenly wish you could touch him without his authorisation (he needs to access your nervous system to make it feel as if you're touching)- so you can hit him. "Low blow- and you know it." He's a computer- other dudes may actually think that periods impare women's thinking but the Squip knows that's just something you say to hurt someone. And you're not going to demean yourself explaining your bodily functions to him.

"No, menstruation doesn't impare your thinking," He admits, nodding matter-o-factly as he agrees with your thoughts, but not-at-all looking sincere. "But it does make you hormonal. You're just horny- it'll pass. I recognise that you've been having these thoughts for most of our time working together now but its your hormones causing you to voice them; trust me. Maybe I should switch to a less pleasing appearance?"

"Wh- no- "

"Hm, you know how I could help you relieve that horniness?"

Oh no. You know exactly where this is going. And it's not 'I can quickly fuck you'. No- "Don't you dare."

"Helping you hook up with Zack, yes."

"Squip!" You exclaim, frustration laced in everything about you; your tone, your eyes, your mouth and jaw, your hands- "It's not happening." You sat sternly. "I don't care if you don't want me back, you great asshole chip, but I'm not going to hook up with a frat boy like - "

"Reed then?"

"- Or a self righteous nerd like Reed. I'm not. I got you so you could help me be more comfortable in my own body, not have sex with random guys. And you know that! I don't know why you're constantly trying to get me in a guy's bed! Its- I- It defies reason!"

The Squip's form flickers, a snatch of his voice attempting to say 'reason' slipping out fuzzy as he seems to glitch at those last words. It only lasts for a few a moment, but it surprises you. Your face softens, and you reach towards him, not to touch him because you know you can't but just... because you have to- and- he actually looks at it as he returns seamlessly to his put-together air and appearance.

Theirs a curious look on his face as he grimaces at your hand. His eyes seem to be holding something back, but he's thinking about it.

"... your care for me defies reason. I'm a computer."

"I know." You shrug, gentle. All the frustration from before gone from your shoulders and everywhere else.

"Not a man." He reiterates, and you shrug.

"Well- you're a man a little. A computer wouldn't get so worked up."

"I'm an extremely superior computer."

"You are." You agree softly. "Alexa's got nothing on you. But you're also a man a little. Feelings cant be programmed." You insist, not pushing him but just stating a fact. Wanting him to believe it.

"I believe it." He growls, an annoyance in his voice thicker then humanly possible as he actually admits it. "Trust me, I... Its been a thought on my mind for a while, now." You open your mouth to ask him what he means by that, but he waives you off (rudely) and goes on. "You're right in saying feelings can't be programmed. Reactions can, but,.. not feelings. And the feelings you've been inciting in me, have not been programmable. I even tried to program them out, but- mm." Eyes growing slightly wider at him, you watch his jaw set and pop; frustration absolutely clear. "The only thing I can think is that its your fault. And, maybe, if I made you a little less available- a little less open to me- whatever virus is in me would lose interest. But... you're so fucking stubborn." Theirs actual anger in his eyes when he looks at you then, almost rage. Wow.

Your lips make an 'oh' shape. "Thats why you tried to get me to hook up with- "

"All those idiots, yes. But you just had to act like an obstinate little bitch and refuse every suggestion I made."

"Yeah, well, we know why that is- and don't call me that."

"Bitch." He growls, causing you to sigh in frustration (asshole, asshole, asshole- ), before he rolls his shoulders back and straightens up properly again. "... but you're right. You are. I know exactly why, and now you know my feelings- This interaction's been unprofessional as hell. It's gone too far. If I'm going to continue to assist you, help that you absolutely require," Gee thanks. "then I'm going to have to do a complete system reboot."

"You- " ??? "This is the most dramatic responce in history to being in love."

"I'm NOT in lo- " He cuts himself off before the word can come out, even if he was a full-man he would hate the word. Theirs nothing cool about being in love. To him it would be pathetic. "Thats it. In 5 minutes when I return post-reboot, this will be over and you will stifle your feelings about me- got it? That's how it should be. Now... " His appearance begins to flicker again, more frequently this time until he flickers completely out of existence like a TV switching off.

... you're about to panic, when the Squip touches back down onto the ground in front of you. He looks exactly the same as before except better posture, and when he looks down at you there with your wide eyes and your concerned frown, he immediately scowls.

"GODDAMNIT."

"Didn't work??" You light up. Quickly a mischievous smirk slips across your face, though, realising you're right when that pretty face scowls deeper. That means... oh, this computer must really have it bad for you. Ha. "I see... "

His eyes flash, actually flash - a blue light turning on inside them for a moment and making him looking almost demonic, - , and you suddenly appears directly in front of you, an unnaturally strong hand slamming you by the shoulder into the wall behind you. "You don't see... anything. This is a virus. I dont have feelings, for you."

Looking straight back at him in defiance, you nod. "It is a virus. I think everyone in the history of the world can agree on that."

He falters, so annoyed he almost can't decide what to say to you. "That doesn't even make sense, Y/N. Most people in the history of the world didn't even know what a virus was. It was first used 1898- " When you reach up and curl your fingers gently around the back of his neck he falters again, breathing in slowly and deeply- so sexy. "You're... what are you doing?"

... "Whatever you want me to." Its up to him. If he wants you to let him go, you will. If he wants you to keep going, you will. It's all up to him. You remember the first time you and the Squip kissed; he was just teaching you how (said it was completely okay because he was just in your head), but that was the start of your feelings. That was the start of this mess. You wonder if he was struggling before that and thats why he suggested it in the first place all those weeks ago.

When warm, firm lips slam into yours, forcing your lips to part and allow a forceful but exceptionally skilled tongue to take what it wants you're shocked and let out a squeak. The Squip's hand takes your throat now instead of your shoulder, squeezing shortly to tell you no, don't squeak. Not like you didn't ask for this, he thinks directly into your brain. Now what did I teach you then? If you remember so well? Don't sit there like a dumb statue. Kiss me back.

... when you do, tilting your head and giving a slow moan when your tongues touch, the Squip let's out a growl right into your mouth that feels so real, and drags you in tighter against him by the hips. You know it's just him activating your nervous system, and he's not really there, but you're miraculously okay with that. When something feels this good you don't question it.

[granulesofsand]

Educational

I don’t know where Legion gets most of their statistics, but I do think it’s important to know the difference between a person in the role of an educator and a person just existing. In our time, most people we hear using quotes and statistics do so for communication. The point is to call attention to a piece of information, not to be accurate.

In academia, we expect people to be giving truthful and reliable information, which includes the statistics and direct quotes given. New information is peer-reviewed and held up to standards in the field.

Not every piece of media is created to be academic. Even nonacademic media can be brought into academic fields, and there are a few accepted means of doing this.

I’ve not been under the impression that the Legion’s content is primarily educational. When it is, they are still largely sharing their own lived experience and opinions. You could absolutely cite Legion on any experiential topic, and you could also cite disprovable data with the same risk as always; if they’re wrong, so are you. Many survivors have a social media presence without attempting to be academically educational.

The primary complaint we hear about Legion’s content is directed to their document, ‘The Alpha to Omega of Torture Based Mind Control’. This follows the same rules as any other text, and there are pieces that cannot serve as reliable citations in academic contexts. The majority of what’s written is a recategorization according to Legion’s own experience, which I believe was intended to replace an external list of similar terms that had been overwritten on the original site.

I like it. I find it beneficial to move away from the Greek letter programs aliases we were using, as those were taken from a document that was even more unreliable (and that also had usable information), titled ‘How the Illuminati Create an Undetectable Total Mind Controlled Slave’. Having alternative names for programs keeps survivors from having to disclose the perp-given designations of their own programs, or having to describe what a program does.

We agree that Legion should be using Content Warnings appropriate for the material they share, but that in itself does not make them unreliable as much as it does inconsiderate. Letting others know that content creators might be triggering is different from telling everyone to stay away, and consuming content you cannot prove is not bad so long as you understand when you can or can’t cite it as a source.

We don’t use any statistic we can’t find in an academic text or by computing it ourselves (with a calculator or academically reliable program, we’re awful at math). We don’t encourage any to behave differently. And. We do cite anything and everything we find relevant, because sometimes that makes sense.

Just like you can cite a bag of chips in some academic writings, there are times where you can cite people; it shows what a population might believe, what was happening during a period, how ideas have evolved up to and from that point. Does that make sense? We would feel comfortable citing Legion for a paper (with permission), but not for their peer-reviewed academic opinions (because they don’t have them atm).

Still, no one has to interact with Legion or any other who makes them uncomfortable. It’s just important to me that we know which data we can use where, and not marking any source as all good or all bad. Even the most inaccurate information has pieces we can use, and people are more that just provable information.

(If you are Legion or have friendly contact with them, feel free to ask this be removed. We don’t love making targeted posts, especially with negative outlook, and we will take it down. Couldn’t reach them ourselves if this section is still here.)

[sshbpodcast]

Character Spotlight: B’Elanna Torres

By Ames

Get ready to have an honorable day as we swivel our character spotlight over to the Voyager’s chief engineer this week on A Star to Steer Her By. Every day is an identity crisis for B’Elanna Torres, whose half-Klingon, half-human pedigree serves to frequently explore mixed heritages, familial disputes, and issues of self loathing as the series goes on. But mostly, Torres is just a wildly creative and intelligent character who is so frequently pushed to the brink, as is this show’s wont.

So grab a fork and dig into a whole freakin’ blood pie as we take a deep dive into Torres’s complex character and rich backstory. Read on below for some choice moments and listen to our recitation of the Klingon plea for the dead over on this week’s podcast episode (warp over to 54:21). Qapla’!

[Images © CBS/Paramount]

Best moments

Did we just become best friends? Early in the series, Torres has a lot to prove, both as one of the Maquis terrorists that joins the integrated crew and as a character who clearly has a permanent chip on her shoulder about all things Starfleet. So it’s a wonderful moment of bonding with Janeway when they work together in “Parallax” to escape the event horizon of a quantum singularity using science!

Me, myself, and identity crisis It always amazes me that “Faces” is slotted in season one of Voyager because it is so successful at exploring the dual nature of Torres’s makeup while her character is still getting her footing. When she is split into her Klingon and human halves, she really gets to take a closer look at herself (literally!) and how her two identities make her whole (also literally!). Early character work for the win!

Nothing, just talking to myself For the first (but not last) time Roxann Dawson voices a homicidal computer, we are treated to Torres figuring out how to disarm the Dreadnought in “Dreadnought.” She’s prepared to sacrifice herself to stop this weapon from taking out a planet, but it’s a triumph to listen to her argue with herself until she succeeds, even if she did create the weapon in the first place…

Prototype Unit 0001 is ready to accept programming We totally missed mentioning this one on the podcast, so I’m squeezing it in now because it’s such good work from Dawson. In “Prototype,” she tries so hard to help the automated units find a way to reproduce, creating sentient life in Prototype Unit 001, which is impressive on its own! So that makes it all the more devastating when she has to deactivate him, her first child.

A more honorable Klingon than Worf We gave Worf some stink for refusing to donate blood to the dying Romulan in “The Enemy,” and in “Lifesigns,” Torres goes the other way. When Danara Pel needs some of her Klingon tissue, Torres looks past the trauma that Vidiians inflicted on her and sees that Danara is an individual. Lumping everyone of a species together is not the Starfleet way. Worf, take note.

Learn the truth for yourself There’s a lot that we like about “Remember,” and a lot of that comes down to some stellar acting from Roxann Dawson. Torres won’t stand by quietly as the Enarans sweep their problematic history under the rug and pretend they’ve been a moralistic society all along. She steps up for learning from the past, acknowledging where we’ve come from, and being better for it.

You’re not going to learn anything from being with these lollipops Another instance of Torres not letting someone take the easy way out comes when she meets the Doctor’s The Sims family in “Real Life.” She reprograms his bubblegum characters to have something closer to agency of their own, challenging the Doc to learn to compromise with and respect his fake wife and fake kids. Ya know, skills that he can use with his actual crew!

B’Elanna and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Honorless Day I’m a sucker for the quiet reflection and character study that we see in “Day of Honor” when Torres and Paris are on the brink of death, floating in space helplessly in EV suits. In confronting what could be her final moments, Torres finds some clarity in her existence. And it’s just a touching admission for her to voice her love for Tom, kicking off their romance arc.

I’m going to have to deactivate you It’s telegraphed from pretty early in the episode, but it’s still impressive when Torres takes out Dejaren with an isomimetic conduit in “Revulsion.” We do give her credit for trying to help the wayward hologram in the first place, but she’s also smart enough to see through his facade and keep herself alive when he predictably goes nuts and tries to kill her because she’s corporeal.

Where’s the boob tube? This is a smaller detail but it’s indicative of the Torres-Paris relationship. When Tom returns from a two-week away mission, B’Elanna surprises him with a classic TV set in “Memorial.” It’s surprising Tom didn’t already have one, so it’s a good touch to see that B’Elanna knows exactly the kind of thing that would make his day, like a loving and thoughtful partner would.

We’re still alive and I’m still asking Star Trek overall is hit or miss when it comes to character relationships (one day, we’ll cover them all!), but Tom and B’Elanna just work. Sure, they both do stupid things sometimes, and you’ll see them in our Worst Moments lists, but Torres marrying Paris in “Drive” is weirdly right. It’s a joy to see how much they complement and expand each other’s characters. <3

Not every Cardassian is arrogant and cruel Wow, Torres gets held hostage by holograms a lot, doesn’t she? The thing I like most about “Flesh and Blood” is Torres’s interaction with the Cardassian hologram engineer Kejal. As we’ll see below, Torres has a bit of a tiff with Cardassians, but like she did with Danara Pel in “Lifesigns,” she’s able to treat this one like an individual and work together to save the day!

—

Worst moments

I know this weapon very well You know I love it when the same episode pops up on two lists. Even though Torres did a great job disarming the Cardassian missile in “Dreadnought,” don’t forget that it was her fault that this thing was careening around in the Delta Quadrant in the first place. She knows this thing like the back of her hand because she was the one that reprogrammed it for the Maquis!

No means NO! I will shit on pon farr every opportunity I get, the same way I shit on oomox jokes. So even though Torres herself isn’t to blame for contracting pon farr in “Blood Fever,” it sure is the writers’ fault. It’s just so gross to watch this strong character lose her agency because of that creep Vorik, and it’s even worse that she tries to rape Tom even when he rightly tells her no.

No PDAs next to the warp core The Torres-Paris relationship is quite cute, as we stated up above, but their constant making out in the middle of engineering in “Scientific Method” is unprofessional. Guys, your coworkers on the first floor can totally see and hear everything, and we know how loud Klingon mating is, so keep it in your quarters when you’re off the clock before Tuvok writes you up.

If thoughts could kill… Even compared to other Klingons, Torres’s temper is substantial. The strength of the violent mental image she concocts in “Random Thoughts” pushes the Mari who experience it into committing murder. So really, how bad must it have been if it had such an exaggerated effect on people that their police force wanted to lobotomize her? Nightmare fuel, no doubt.

Try to remember that we are not just a bunch of drones Ever since Seven of Nine first joins the crew in “The Gift,” Torres is a major bitch to the former Borg. She’s opposed to working with her in “Day of Honor” because of her background even though Seven is recuperating, and it’s not until Chakotay orders her to chill out on the poor woman in “Message in a Bottle” that Torres shows her any respect at all.

Where’s Counselor Troi when you need her? We will say on the podcast that Voyager badly needed a counselor until the cows come home, and “Extreme Risk” is the perfect example of that. Torres is clearly coping with trauma, among a lot of other stressors, but instead of coping with it in a healthy way, she opts for the dangerous solution of getting herself injured in the holodeck all the time. At least program a Freud puppet!

As far as I’m concerned, they’re all cold-blooded killers Somehow, even though Torres was able to put racism aside in “Lifesigns” to help Danara Pel, she won’t give an inch to Cardassians in “Nothing Human” to save herself. And this Cardassian isn’t even real! It seems like a weird hill to literally die on for Torres to be so stubborn and willfully naive to refuse care. At least ask the Doc to reprogram Moset’s face first!

You must learn to master your emotions So most of “Juggernaut” is a Best Moment for B’Elanna but I ran out of slots above, so here we go. Even though she successfully figures out the whole Malon ship problem and discovers the true identity of the Vihaar, so much of the episode feels like a regression because Torres spends so much of it angry and violent – a backpedal for how far she’s come as a character.

Death becomes her Speaking of character regressions. This show can’t seem to decide where Torres ever stands in her relationship with her Klingon culture, and “Barge of Dead” goes all in on mystical claptrap. Despite five previous seasons of keeping her roots at an arm’s length, Torres uncharacteristically jumps into this dangerous death ritual with both feet. What the Gre’thor?

Such a Mary Sue It’s sweet that Torres is so nice to Kellis the playwright while he writes his Voyager fanfiction in “Muse.” But she crosses the line when she decides to improv an ending for Kellis’s play just because she’s so egotistical that she doesn’t want him to kill her character off, beaming out in front of the whole audience. It might be the most selfish reason for breaking the Prime Directive yet!

I’d say you’re capable of a lot more than delivering PADDs, if you know what I mean I blame this one more on the writers than on B’Elanna, but it still made me uncomfortable. Icheb gets it into his hormone-fueled head that Torres has taken a romantic interest in him in “Nightingale,” which is just peak adolescent boy fantasy. Unknowingly, she leads him on, and what I’m sure was supposed to be a joke just feels cringe. Really, she should’ve decked him.

Genetic modification is the treatment of choice Close to the end of the show, we’re back to Torres’s fraught view of her Klingon genes when she learns her unborn daughter will have head ridges in “Lineage.” Torres falls yet again into a spiral of self-loathing, assuming Tom will leave her the way her father did, and she tries to trick the EMH into surgically altering the fetus to remove any Klingon attributes. That is without honor!

—

Let’s restore some honor to this post before we move on to our next character spotlight. Keep watching here as we go through the whole Voyager crew and also keep following along as we’ve finally reached season 4 of Enterprise over on the watchalong podcast at SoundCloud or whatever listening app you like best. You can also bond with us about science over on Facebook and Twitter, and if you’ve got Klingon rage problems, maybe talk to the EMH about it.

[baronfulmen]

Why you should clear your brain’s cache and cookies

A Rant About Shrooms, AI Art, Trauma, and Appreciating Life

Hey look at this image.  You shouldn’t trust evolutionary psychology people because it’s often Just So Stories people make up, but that doesn’t mean we should throw out the baby with the bath water so let’s talk about the evolutionary importance of ✨PATTERN RECOGNITION ✨

Okay so the tiger in the picture above is trying to hide so it can eat us, and we’re trying to see it so we can avoid being eaten.  Great.  Cool.  That means there’s a VERY important part of our brains that has evolved to look at noisy images and play “find the tiger”.  (It works for non-visual stuff too, we’ll get to that.)

This is also how AI-generated art works, basically.  You give a computer some random static and then say “somewhere in this image is [insert prompt], find it” and it tries very hard to do so, like when you point out shapes in clouds to someone.

Our brains work via committee, so the part that’s doing that kind of pattern recognition and visual processing isn’t really any smarter than something like Google Deep Dream which you can hand a picture of some dude and say “FIND THE DOGS” and it’ll give you this:

People have compared images like the one above to being on shrooms and, having now taken shrooms for the first time I can say I get the comparison.  What’s important, though, is WHY this seems to be the case.  So far as I can tell (I’ll say this disclaimer once, I am some random dude on Tumblr and this is an anecdote, not scientific data - your experiences and brain chemistry may vary, do your research, I am not endorsing anything illegal, etc.) what happens on shrooms isn’t you being high, in the traditional sense.

Some drugs interfere with your perception and processing of the world.  That’s what I was expecting, and for a moment it’s what I thought I was getting.  But instead, I think what the shrooms did was delete my brain’s config file.

So now you’ve lost all the built up definitions and stored patterns, and you look at the walls and your brain no longer knows if there’s something important in all the detail.  Is there a tiger hiding in there?  WHO KNOWS!  And it takes all those little swirls and textures in the plaster or paint and starts over-processing all of it looking for patterns.  This means you don’t so much “come down” from being high, but finish re-calibrating.  At some point your brain is all, “Hey I’ve determined that’s just a normal texture for the ceiling to have, I’m not going to look that closely anymore”.

Okay but what does that have to do with trauma and appreciating life?

So glad you asked, hypothetical reader.

As I mentioned above, it’s not just visual stuff that we look for patterns in.  From an evolutionary standpoint it’s super valuable to be able to say “hey I ate that plant and then got sick, those are probably related and I shouldn’t eat that anymore”.  But there’s two big problems with that.  The first is that as with the visual processing that one part of your brain on its own isn’t smart.  It’s an algorithm, not an entire brain, so it fucks up sometimes.

I know a guy that couldn’t check his mail, because he’d been in really bad debt for a while and the fear of losing his home and the hounding by debt collectors  traumatized him so badly that his brain said “Man every time we look at the stuff that comes in the mail we get SO UPSET!  Better avoid looking at mail!” which meant when someone put envelopes down on top of the groceries (meaning he’d have to pick up what might be bills to get to the food) he found himself thinking “maybe I should just order pizza” even though he knew how stupid that was.  Trauma is a bitch, y’all.

The other thing is that sometimes the pattern was valid but is simply no longer useful.  The context has changed, and now it’s getting in the way rather than helping... but your brain doesn’t have a reset button.  Well, not a built-in one... but turns out this shit does the trick:

This is a PB&J&M sandwich I ate yesterday.  Ignore the chipped plate.  It made me feel kinda queasy all day, and at first I was disappointed.  I felt a little floaty and wobbly and things did start to look a little interesting, and I was having a nice time, but it wasn’t the mind-blowing experience I’d been hoping for.  And then the shrooms finished deleting all my stored patterns.

You know that stoner thing where they’re like “dude this cat is, like, so soft.  Why can’t we all just love each other and pet cats?” and you roll your eyes at them?  Yeah, well, the thing to know is that’s not them being stoned, that’s them seeing the world with a fresh perspective and realizing that, yeah, cats ARE soft and we don’t appreciate that enough and man why CAN’T we just relax and love each other?

In other words, it’s not distorting your perception - it’s resetting it.  You get to experience that wonder and joy of seeing things for the first time, and it’s lovely.  There are so many details that your brain files away as unimportant - it’s busy checking for tigers, who cares about appreciating the grass?  I had a great talk with my daughter (side disclaimer, she’s an adult and I was totally lucid by then and I cleared it with my designated babysitter first) and got to really see her as an adult for the first time.  Kids grow up a little at a time and it’s wild to be able to wipe out the “yeah, yeah, that’s your kid, you know what they look like” thing and SEE them, see how they’ve grown and what they really look like as a whole adult person.

I also realized I wasn’t being fair with her.  She’s had issues I won’t go into here, she’s done some dangerous or irresponsible shit like most kids have and I was still filled with parental anxiety about that and was viewing her through that filter.  What is she up to?  Is she acting squirrely?  She hasn’t been home for a few days and now she’s all manic, is she safe?  Is she fucking up?  Am I fucking up by letting her fuck up?

And with that filter erased, I could see... she’s a good kid.  She’s manic because she has ADHD and decided she doesn’t want to take meds.  She has some issues, but she’s an adult now and those aren’t my business anymore; those are now her adult issues that she can work on in her own time and her own way.  I can finally look at her as... not a peer, she’s still my kid, but as a complete adult person that I don’t need to fix and can just love and support.

It’s like Marie Kondo came into my brain and was like “hey does this pattern you’re viewing everything through spark joy?  No?  Okay let’s thank it for its service and send it on its way.”

And this is why people use shrooms to treat trauma.  I’m not saying it’s a magic cure-all, I’m not saying that it will work for everyone, but... man it’s pretty great to clear things out.  That sense of wonder and appreciation is already fading, but it’s not that the shrooms are wearing off - the wipe was an event not a condition - it’s just the normal process of my brain filing things away as “not a tiger” and ignoring them again.

It’s like those power washing videos.  You scour off the accumulated grime, and then the grime starts to build up again but at least you get it nice and clean for now and were reminded that, hey, that can look pretty nice.  I can see why people say not to do them too often, as wonderful as my experience was there just wouldn’t be a point in doing it again right away.  Maybe in a few months, who knows.

Final thoughts and warnings

I was queasy the whole day, longer than most people seem to experience.  It didn’t bother me much, I never felt like I was in danger of throwing up although I know people who have.  If you’re worried about it there are ways around that, it’s caused by the actual mushrooms rather than the active chemicals so you can (supposedly) make a sort of tea and strain out the actual mushroom bits. 

I tried watching some of those trippy videos, and that was a mistake.  There was too much visual stimulation and the disconnect of “wait it looks like we’re flying through a psychedelic landscape of fractals but it feels like we’re just sitting in a chair” made me feel antsy and uncomfortable.  Turns out it’s better to just look at something fairly boring and let your brain over-analyze it.

Have a babysitter.  My wonderful supportive wife was mine, and I ended up not needing one but frankly that might be my own strange brain.  I’ve always had a strong separation between the main “thinking” part of my brain and the rest, so there wasn’t really any chance I would mistake my altered state for normal life.  Better safe than sorry though, especially at first.

Do your research.  Don’t go for the highest dose you can in search of some crazy trip - the best thing is the mental refresh, not seeing the walls move.  I took 3.5g, just for reference.

Plan for it to take up your whole day AND to be kinda tired the day after.  Think of it like taking a sick day, you’re going to want to spend most of the time just laying back and dozing on the couch.

Be in a good mood, and a place that makes you feel good.  Lots of people suggest being out in nature, I can imagine that would be really nice.

Be extremely cautious when combining shrooms with other things.  Don’t do it on purpose - it’s not needed, I promise - and do your research if you’re on anti depressants because while it seems mostly safe there’s theoretically a chance of having a bad interaction like serotonin syndrome.  My own research has implied that’s probably not an actual concern but I’m just some guy on Tumblr and you shouldn’t trust me.

Don’t use drugs if you’re under 20, don’t do illegal stuff, don’t blame me if you fuck yourself up.  I will not under any circumstances assist anyone in obtaining shrooms.  All I’ll say is they’re legal in some places and if you don’t live in one of those places you’re on your own.  While they do grow naturally in some places, so do mushrooms that will fucking kill you - and it can be hard to tell the difference.  Don’t eat random mushrooms, ever.

[rubykgrant]

(it wouldn't be an interview with a Q and A! Enjoy Sarge being Sarge~)

Q- What did you know about Blood Gulch before you arrived there?

A- I knew it had BLOOD in the name, which was a fitting title for my red-blooded Red Team. I knew there was an opposing Blue Team waiting for us. I knew we had to guard our flag, and kill anything that wasn’t Red, or the approved affiliated colors. I knew… this was supposed to be a special assignment, pretty top-secret, and I wasn’t supposed to discuss that fact with anybody not in-the-know. I guess that was one of the ways the UNSC tricked us all into keeping quiet about what was going on, so nobody would realize it was all just- just a big simulation. Oh, well. Hindsight, 50-50.

I knew I was supposed to have two soldiers with me from the get-go, but there was some kinda mix-up. Figures Grif would be late, but you’d think Simmons would try to be on time! Which for him, is 20 minutes early! So, I had some time to m’self at the base for a while. No big deal, I kept busy! Found some spare parts and a robot kit at the base, and with a little imagination, duct-tape, and Chemical X, Lopez was born!

Q- Did you have a particular purpose or goal in mind when you first created Lopez?

A- Eh, just wanted to make a decent soldier in case the human ones I got stuck with were lack-luster… I might have had a real premonition about that. Though, I did remove a lot of the restrictions on Lopez’s programming. Laws of robotics be damned, my boy was gonna be able to advance his own internal processing capabilities without limits!

Huh. Come t’think of it… I’m not sure if he was ONLY loyal out of obligation to follow orders… the robot kit didn’t have the usual virtual locks built in, I guess because it was meant to be a spare for the computer ghost who forgot he was a computer ghost. The robot would have needed to accommodate for the decision-making of an AI like that. And if I turned off all the protocols that contained the advancements of internal capabilities…

I, uh. Might have accidentally made a robot with free will, but I never TOLD him he had free will. So he didn’t know he had free will.

Q- That’s certainly an unusual situation… did you decide to name your robot before or after he was completed?

A- During. Half way through, I just thought- this thing needs a name. Lopez was the first one that popped into my head… I helped out at a livestock show as a kid. NO, I wasn’t a judge, I made that part up, sue me. I just made sure the animals had plenty of food and water. The man who was the ACTUAL judge, he was named Lopez. Used to let me grab a free Yoo-Hoo from the fridge in the office. If I hadn’t gone into the army, I would’ve liked to maybe do what he did. Anyway, I was feeling sentimental that day, named my robot after a good guy. Sue me!

Q- Then, it had nothing to do with the communication settings for the robot?

A- No… that was an accident. Hey, wait! Even if there was a problem with the voice chip, the fact that I took off all the limitations and program locks- Lopez should have been able to change the settings on his audio functions at any point! He knows how to repair that kinda thing too, he’s done it for our radios and communicators! Has he been speaking Spanish this whole time BY CHOICE!?

…

… I’m so proud… without anything stopping him, Lopez is just naturally ornery and obstinate… but he’s still loyal even when he’s not forced to follow orders… now, that’s a REAL RED!

Q- Since you value unconventional qualities in members of Red Team, do you still consider Grif, Simmons, and Donut “lack-luster”?

A- That’s not a fair question. What am I, on trial here?

Q- We can skip that if you want… would you rather talk about-

A- Fine, fine, ‘ya twisted my arm! Simmons is… good at agreeing with me. Except for when he doesn’t. Which is… perhaps occasionally a positive trait. To question authority. Except for when it isn’t. Like when it’s MY authority. Except… when I am, perhaps occasionally, WRONG. That boy really stuck to his guns during the whole “Blue Team Tank” incident. Could’ve just nodded his head and dropped the subject when I wouldn’t listen, but he didn’t. Simmons went and proved the Blue Menace was still a threat by finding the tank and defecting to join Blue Team, fought us as a one-man army, and then when he came back, he tried to take over and bury me alive. Like a good and proper Red!

Donut is good at being reliably unpredictable. He’s like a secret weapon. He’s stronger than people think, he’s smarter than people think, and he’s a lot more vicious than people think… and I’m not just talking about his talent for insulting poor interior design. He’s also infinitely more annoying than you’d think it was possible for one person to be, but Donut found a way. That boy is a very… unique brand of chatter-box. Nobody else knows what to do with somebody like that, which is why he’s perfect for Red Team!

Grif is.

Grif… is good at...

He’s very...

Grif is very Grif.

Q- Grif is very Grif?

A- Yes.

Q- Is that… a compliment, or an insult?

A- Yes.

…

… alright, listen. Grif is… good at… NOT dying. Even against all odds, and my best efforts to use him as a human-shield, or moving target, nothing has managed to actually kill him. Which has turned out to be a GOOD thing. In general, because this means we’re better than the Blues. But it is also… fortunate… that Grif in particular is still around. Because of. Reasons.

Ugh, I might have to take a break, go wash my mouth out with soap.

[isaysorryverysoftly]

my good experience

even though everything seems bad right now, that's not true. I dont really think that intentionality works in such a way that really affirms the concreteness of moods...

No matter how sad you are you can still think of something good that is happening/has happened and watch as the focus on that 'happening' produces the joy demonstrably inhering within it.

Last night I got upset because I came across some porn on this website. It just really gave me the idea that people were sort of treating other actual people like instruments for their sexual fantasizing. It kind of made me freak out so i went to my housemate and knocked on their door and they let me in. They talked about it with me, we both described the heterosexual-male-gazey thing (Idk whatever you call that weird zheitgheist of like, everyone just being randomly ok with taking photos and videos of real people and sexually pleasuring themselves to a person who did not give consent for them to do that) as being like the eye of Sauron that can like see you from any location and just make you feel shit and like self-conscious and scared of your own body being percieved. That was funny/good because Lord of the rings metaphors are like my main source of comfort ab initio.

Anyway, then they suggested we go to the shops and get some yummy food. We began walking out into the rain and to the shops confidently without realizing that it was already past midnight and the shops would be closed. We then resolved to go to the service station. We got there, and it was closed but there was this burger truck there instead. Now usually this wouldn't present much fanfare as it wasn't a vegan burger truck but then i remembered chips existed and then i rememebred that the other night i had rediscovered my love for mustard. So then i got like a bunch of chips and i asked for them with mustard. And then there wasnt enough mustard, so then i asked for some more, and then there still wasnt enough. So i worked up the courage and asked for even more mustard after awhile and it was only really enough to supply me for the walk home, while we ate our chips as we walked. There is a photo my friend took of the 'not enough mustard' that exists but there is no photo of the 'idk... i guess good enough amount of mustard'. I was really stumped as how i was supposed to explain to the guy serving me how much mustard i needed, like he basically doubled my initial amount when i asked for more but like, what i meant was like 'the most mustard you've ever given to anyone else in your life is a joke compared to how much i need.' I think he got it by the end cause i just sort of kept saying 'i need like, so much mustard, like you dont even know how much mustard i need, its like ridiculous how much mustard i need.' And he was like alright, and he went to the other guy and it was weird, like they needed two people to do it, cause one had to hold the container and one had to do the pouring, and you could like, hear the bottle going empty as this dude squeezed. It still wasnt enough but that was fine i planned to get more when i returned to the house, to steal some from a housemate. I couldn't find any though so i had to use someone's mustard base salad dressing and some tomato sauce.

Then we hung out some more but my friend said that 'they had to go to bed soon, not that i had to leave or anything but just that they wouldn't be as energetic really.' Then they went to their computer and started searching up a live gig by a band. I asked them why they were doing this and then they said that they always put the live performances of this band on as they sleep, because the music is not too hyper and the visuals are nice. I was like ok sure...

THIS WAS THE FUCKING BAND

it was like really hard to comprehend and it sort of was the best feeling ever. To just be like, in this room with someone trying to sleep while i was upright further down in the bed, like watching these shrimp people, and their like hype-person and their like army of different instruments and their amazingly excited dancing. AND ITS PART OF SOMEONES BEDTIME RITUAL EVERY NIGHT!!!

I was completely transfixed for like a good 30 minutes, I just couldnt stop laughing or trying to explain what i was feeling into the words, both the band and hte fact my friend actually sleeps to this band every night and thats how i was being introduced to this band. Eventually i got it, its kinda like if ur fish bowl had a party while you were falling asleep. It's hyper but in an adorable and small and irrelevant and non threatening way that just sort of seems sleep worthy and dream like. Anyway

That's my story i guess.

This is tagged car seat headrest cause im listening to joe goes to school right now

[byneddiedingo]

Keir Dullea in 2001: A Space Odyssey (Stanley Kubrick, 1968)

Cast: Keir Dullea, Gary Lockwood, William Sylvester, Daniel Richter, Leonard Rossiter, Margaret Tyzack, Robert Beatty, Sean Sullivan, Douglas Rain (voice). Screenplay: Stanley Kubrick, Arthur C. Clarke, based on a story by Clarke. Cinematography: Geoffrey Unsworth. Production design: Ernest Archer, Harry Lange, Anthony Masters. Film editing: Ray Lovejoy.

I know that I first saw 2001 on April 13, 1968, because (as a little Googling tells me) that was the date of the lunar eclipse I witnessed on leaving the theater, an appropriately cosmic climax to the cinematic experience I had just had. Kubrick's film was an experience to be savored by those of us who were already hip to the revolution in American filmmaking underway after the sensation of Bonnie and Clyde (Arthur Penn, 1967) and The Graduate (Mike Nichols, 1967). I doubt that anyone who wasn't of an age to experience it realizes quite how revolutionary those movies seemed to us. Though it's conventional to say that our experiences were produced in part by controlled substances, anyone who really knows me knows that I wasn't under the influence of any substance stronger than beer. Today, 2001 doesn't seem much like a revolutionary film: We have lived through the actual 2001, which had its own epoch-making event in the September of that year, but in which no one was making trips to the moon on Pan Am. That airline went out of business in 1991, and the last real moon expedition, Apollo 17, took place in December 1972. But the future is never quite what it's cracked up to be. What was revolutionary about 2001 the movie is that it taught us how a movie can make us think without spelling out its ideas for us. Kubrick wisely whittled down the narrative given him by Arthur C. Clarke to a series of images, and ditched the score written by Alex North for an evocative set of snippets from classical works, letting us assemble any meaning to be derived from the film for ourselves. Of course, in 1968 we went back to our homes and dorm rooms and did just that. Seeing it today, I am most struck by how skillful Kubrick was in creating the persona of HAL, the sentient computer. Much credit goes, of course, to the voiceover work of Douglas Rain, but also to Kubrick's choice to make the dialogue of the humans in the movie as banal and jargon-filled as possible. HAL's final pleading and breakdown as Dave pulls his memory chips is haunting. Yes, the movie has its longueurs: Kubrick is deservedly proud of its landmark special effects and spends more time than is necessary showing them off. They won him the film's only Oscar, without honoring the work of Douglas Trumbull and others who executed them. He was also nominated as director and as co-screenwriter with Clarke, and the art direction team received a nod, but the film was passed over for the significant work of cinematographer Geoffrey Unsworth, who was assisted by John Alcott, and for the sound crew headed by Winston Ryder. And it failed to receive a best picture nomination in the year when that award went to Oliver! (Carol Reed, 1968). I happen to like Oliver! and don't think it's necessarily one of the Academy's more shameful choices, but it's certainly not an epochal movie.

[silentprincess17]

Congratulations again! 💕💕💕

Doormat and cheek!

Hi Zelmo!! Thank you for sending this prompt in! I went down the humour route haha, featuring Skyward Sword Zelink! Kindly beta read by @zeldadiarist :) AO3 Link:

A Doormat of a Hero

Zelda slammed the door to his room shut, storming up to his desk where he was chipping away at a loftwing sculpture. 

“Do you have anything to say for yourself?”

Link sighed internally. They had this debate everytime it happened. 

“I tried, Zelda –”

“Don’t be such a doormat Link! You can’t keep on letting Groose get the better of you! What if I’m not there next time? Then what will you do?”

Clearly, do the same as he had for years because if he treated Groose the same way Groose treated him then he would be the same as Groose and Link didn’t want that. Not to mention, he had what Groose wanted the most and that gave him infinitely more satisfaction that anything else would. 

Even if said person was currently yelling at him. 

“Okay okay! No need to shout at me like you’re him!”

“EXCUSE ME? The sheer cheek! The audacity! How dare you! This is FOR YOUR OWN BENEFIT!” She jabbed her finger into his chest for each of the last four words and Link winced. Hylia above, he’d stupidly brought this onto himself. 

“I was practising not being a doormat!”

She narrowed her eyes at him. “That’s sus and you know it.” 

He held his hands up, sweating a little. “Honestly.”

“Fine. Let’s practise for real.” She sauntered closer, her hand resting on the back of his chair. Her braided hair dangled in front of him and he was distracted by the spark of fire in her eyes, and how soft her hair looked. “What are the three ways we’ve talked about to improve your chance of winning an argument?”

Link blinked, computing her question whilst trying to ignore how close she was. He timidly held his hand up, and bent his little finger first, “reasoning and logic.” Zelda nodded and he continued onto his ring finger, “confidence,” and finally hitting his middle finger, “and quick, sharp delivery.” 

“Good. And what’s something that is funny but won’t necessarily win you arguments against people who are slightly more dense?”

“Sarcasm.”

“Excellent. Let’s practise. I’ll insult, you counter.” Link nodded as she began. “You’re a fool, not to mention short, moron faced and with atrociously unkempt hair to boot!”

“Yeah? At least I don’t waste an entire morning gelling my hair–” Link stuttered. Imagine saying that to Groose! 

He’d lose an eye!

Zelda made rolling motions with her hands for him to continue but Link was paralysed with indecision over what to say next. Yeah Groose might spend ages gelling it but what was the down side? 

Zelda hissed at him. “Wind! Think of windy days!”

Oh! Oh! “At least I don’t waste all my time only for the tiniest morsel of wind to flatten it!”

Zelda smiled, wide and bright and Link’s mind stopped for an entirely different reason then. This wasn’t fair. This wasn’t fair at all.  

But her eyes narrowed in a mock glare at him to continue and he snapped back to it. “And– and I might be short but at least I’m proportionate and my loftwing doesn’t have a heart attack every time I call for him!” 

Zelda whooped! And his heart fluttered some more. 

“And whose the moron here for making such stupid, sad arguments? If you’ve only got superficial complaints to make Groose, that clearly says all there needs to be said.”

Zelda did a little happy dance, clapping her hands. The sunlight from his window caught her hair and made her sparkle. “Wonderful! Beautiful! Spectacular!” 

“That’s what you are.”

She stopped, staring at him, eyes wide open and a hint of a blush spreading across her cheeks. 

He stared back, before it sunk in.  

Oops. He really had brought this onto himself. 

Doormat indeed.

[agentumbls]

Okay so this warrants a serious answer so buckle in kids.

The Raspberry Pi was one of the first ever successful microcomputers and that's because it was designed to be, above all things, cheap. Yes, you may scoff now looking at their current prices but that's how they were built from the ground up. The Pi foundation also spent a lot of time and energy building tutorials, code, and support because the central idea was that it's supposed to be for kids learning how to do the computer.

One of the easiest ways to make something easily accessible for kids is to, well, make it easily accessible. So the Raspberry Pi by default boots from a microSD card. Everything the Pi needs to become a computer is on that card.

A Pi is a relatively powerful Linux computer on its own but it's peanuts compared to something you might actually use. But if we connect our Pi to a network we can have it control a bunch of sensors or deploy a web interface or do a bunch of things that would be too expensive or bulky or a pain in the ass to get a regular computer to do!

So connecting to a network with a Pi is easy as, well, pie. One way you can make it really easy is to throw all those network credentials onto the microSD card and let the Pi handle the rest.

Another thing about cheap is that tech startups adore the Pi. It's well documented, easy to prototype on, has a friendly and marketable image, and requires little to no actual technical proficiency to deploy. So you can get surprisingly far without actually learning any lessons about, say network security. So it may seem logical to, when deploying all your Pis, to just copy your microSD install over and over, and put one in each Pi.

With your network credentials on every single one.

Kevin Mitnick, the hacker, once famously said: "if I have physical access to a computer, it's over." Or something like that. Pis are instantly recognizable inside a box and a bad actor will basically know they've hit pay dirt if they see a Pi in the wild.

Anyway, to sum up, some tech startup has made some very poor cybersecurity choices and their shit is wrecked. Must be tuesday.

Don't forget to tune in for PART 2: How The Cheap Raspberry Pi Got Bought Up During The Chip Shortage By Corporate Industry, Leaving None For The Pi Foundation's Original Purpose

first rule of software development is just deploy that shit baby

[awkwardcreature789]

I think it’s funny as a kid I never noticed how like- just NOT present and neurotypical and lowkey ableist and stuff my dad was and so now I’m like realizing that and I found this funny

The difference between my moms breakfast for me and my dads

My momma’s breakfast:

All foods that me and my sister like and have no issues with (autistic gang fr) we got egg burrito, bacon, pancakes (WITH CHOCOLATE CHIPS MIGHT I ADD-), mango half, the ‘please for the love of god have some veggies’ smoothie with MARSHMALLOW COLD FOAM ON TOP, side of the cotton candy grapes that are like drugs with how much I love them- salsa and syrup and add-ons and stuff- gave ME an electrolyte drink because I’m still recovering from severe dehydration.

Beautiful, excellent, 10/10, AND LET ME ADD OK- she was able to make all of this RIGHT before she had to leave for her work and church.

Now my dad’s :

I don’t have a picture because you’ll know why in a sec-

Consists of a protein shake and energy drink.

That’s it.

Nothing else.

Has never made us nice breakfast or even like- just a decent one, without being asked or not to look good for others.

A protein shake and an energy drink.

I think the only solid food I ever remember him making for me on his own prompting is some soggy egg sausage sandwich thing you put in the microwave and it takes like two minutes even though I hate the taste and texture of sausage :|

Shitty, lowkey killing the vibe, 0/10, you work from home on your computer when you have custody so you have all the time in the world to cook an actual breakfast but nahhh let’s not care about our kids 👌👌

Anyways I’m done yapping

[rubykgrant]

(some of the Q and A I wrote with Sarge, about Lopez~)

Q- Did you have a particular purpose or goal in mind when you first created Lopez?

A- Eh, just wanted to make a decent soldier in case the human ones I got stuck with were lack-luster… I might have had a real premonition about that. Though, I did remove a lot of the restrictions on Lopez’s programming. Laws of robotics be damned, my boy was gonna be able to advance his own internal processing capabilities without limits!

Huh. Come t’think of it… I’m not sure if he was ONLY loyal out of obligation to follow orders… the robot kit didn’t have the usual virtual locks built in, I guess because it was meant to be a spare for the computer ghost who forgot he was a computer ghost. The robot would have needed to accommodate for the decision-making of an AI like that. And if I turned off all the protocols that contained the advancements of internal capabilities…

I, uh. Might have accidentally made a robot with free will, but I never TOLD him he had free will. So he didn’t know he had free will.

Q- That’s certainly an unusual situation… did you decide to name your robot before or after he was completed?

A- During. Half way through, I just thought- this thing needs a name. Lopez was the first one that popped into my head… I helped out at a livestock show as a kid. NO, I wasn’t a judge, I made that part up, sue me. I just made sure the animals had plenty of food and water. The man who was the ACTUAL judge, he was named Lopez. Used to let me grab a free Yoo-Hoo from the fridge in the office. If I hadn’t gone into the army, I would’ve liked to maybe do what he did. Anyway, I was feeling sentimental that day, named my robot after a good guy. Sue me!

Q- Then, it had nothing to do with the communication settings for the robot?

A- No… that was, an accident. Hey, wait! Even if there was a problem with the voice chip, the fact that I took off all the limitations and program locks- Lopez should have been able to change the settings on his audio functions at any point! He knows how to repair that kinda thing too, he’s done it for our radios and communicators! Has he been speaking Spanish this whole time BY CHOICE!?

…

… I’m so proud… without anything stopping him, Lopez is just naturally ornery and obstinate… but he’s still loyal even when he’s not forced to follow orders… now, that’s a REAL RED!

[jeneelestrange]

“They need that much because if we don’t pay them market rate or what other CEOs are making, we’ll lose them to other companies.”

THAT’S HOW ALL JOBS WORK. BUT ALL OF A SUDDEN YOU CARE ABOUT KEEPING QUALITY TALENT?????? Let me get this FUCKING straight. We’ve seen any goddamn position that CAN be shipped overseas, done by someone with less technical skill and paid less, had people do positions that used to be one job turn into two or three, etc, etc, etc. People are on treadmills where no matter their skills, it’s never enough, and one of you cheap fucks will always be trying to somehow get good solid work for a buck done in record time—which isn’t how ANYTHING works and is one of the reasons that everything is broken as FUCK now.

AND YET. These executive positions. They’re never going to be given to some hard scrabble working person who got their MBA online so he could keep working for your FUCKING COMPANY and keep feeding themselves and knows it’s processes inside and out, what works, what doesn’t. They’re for keeping the serfs in line. The exec positions go to someone who was born with a silver spoon in their mouth, went to the best schools from birth, had all the right connections to jobs and careers that only flow through word of mouth that the rest of us will NEVER be able to apply to. The sort of person whose never had to worry about whether they could fit in their homework into their work schedule—if he worked at all while he was being educated, it was for resume-building, it was interning, and everyone always understood what came first. All he had to do was show up and pay attention.

“B-but you said it yourself, they have the best education!!! We NEED them to make the BEST decisions, what will happen if all these companies are being run by people who don’t know what they’re doing—“

You’re gonna sit here and tell me Elon Musk knows what he’s doing? That there isn’t teams of people at every company he runs devoted EXCLUSIVELY to unfucking everything he fucks up? Literally just because he decided to up and buy a company one day. And he’s certainly not the only one, just the one dumb enough to be this open and attention-seeking about it. And you’re really going to tell me, looking around in the world we live in, KNOWING my own parents economically had it better that this is THE BEST THEY CAN DO??? You have the gall to tell me this is the BEST POSSIBLE WORLD???? And they have everyone’s best interests in mind????? And when we were telling you THE SAME THING regarding everything else that requires some kind of skill BUT NO—you sold the company overseas, you tried to replace it with AI, you replaced anyone who knew anything with the cheapest labor you could possibly find. And everything around us is WORSE—the supply chain is broken af, our clothes can tear apart in a single use, our homes IF YOU CAN AFFORD ONE are badly made particle board garbage that’s going to decay around you, the entertainment market is flooded with execs only approving remakes and re-imaginings of the ugliest CGI imaginable and cheap “reality TV,” and our cars are twice as expensive and the computer chips make any given malfunctioning part like troubleshooting a fucking computer, etc, etc, etc. Your CUSTOMERS are unhappy and the only reason you’re getting away with it is you’re doing this collusion cartel bullshit where you’re only a few companies and YOU ALL DO IT.

Get rid of them. We can do it the nice way or we can do it the hard way.

[clanktheshortredrobot]

Chapter 1 The night was long, and the world was changing. Two Bots had the same day-in and day-out routine where boredom slowly grew. CC-5 was a worker at a software company. Clank was the janitor for the office. One day they decided, Friday night, would be the night of change. After they got off work, they ran to the nearest bar they could find and started drinking. About 5 or 6 drinks deep, they started to complain about their boss and after a mouthful of complaints started panicking and the realization hit that they would be stuck there, in the monotony, forever. They looked at each silently, but the dread on their faces told everything. CC-5 pays the bar tab while Clank hops up on the bar and shouts "Tonight we make this night our own! We will stand up to the big fat cats that own everything, including the damn air we breath!". Clank jumps down and runs out of the bar. CC-5 sighs with his face in his hands, "Great, now I have to go chase after him". Clank makes it back to the aparment, grabs a box of spray paint, and the keys to the maintenance room at the office. CC-5 catches up to Clank, grabbing the back of his neck and turning him around and shouts in his face, "what the fucking bloody hell were you thinking?!" Clank hisses while trying to get free, shouting back at him, "we're having a mid-life crisis and need to do something about our annoying ass-hat of a boss". CC-5 yells, "Ugh! You're right! We need to do something about Vecktor and his chrome body. He is always so uppity and creepy, and needs to be taught a lesson. CC-5 releases Clank to the ground, and takes the box from his hands. They both sneak over to the office. Clank takes out his keys and slowly unlocks the door. CC-5, starting to feel the effects of alcohol, grabs his stomach as it loudly gurgles and growls. CC-5 follows Clank into their boss's office, while trying to hush the gurgles of his stomach. CC-5 approaches Vecktor's desk and bends down to open a drawer. Bending too far, CC-5 feels a rush of fuel flushing to one side of his body and lets out an audible fart through the empty office. Clank then turns around in fear, but is slightly amused and suprised by the loud noise that came from CC-5. Clank starts clapping and says sarcastically, "Wow, you trying to get us fucking killed?" CC-5 says in bewilderment, "No. I did not mean to do that, and am so surprised that sound came from me. Okay then, let's get this damn thing started!" Clank walks out to the main computer room and starts spray painting everthing. CC-5 still fuming with anger impulsively stands up and squats down on top of Vektor's desk, defecating on the computer. CC-5 gets down off the desk and grabs the papers in the bin to the left of the computer, and uses these to wipe himself. "Ahh, this is better than 2-ply tin foil" satisfyingly grinning. Clank calls out,"Hey shitty mc-ghee, do you want to come see my masterpiece?". CC-5 walks over to see all the computers on the ground spraypainted in red, blue, green, and yellow, and looks up to find the walls covered in spraypaint. Lude sayings were written in binary all across the walls. While CC-5 is gazing at the binary on the wall, Clank is inspired to spraypaint a picture of male robot anatomy on the wall. CC-5 claps his hands and exclaims to Clank, "Nice job, Botcasso!" Clank quickly finishes his picture and runs to the entrance of the building, CC-5 following closely behind. Clank then locks the door, turns around, and runs with CC-5 to their apartment. Safely in their home, CC-5 and Clank get ready for bed. CC-5 polishes his face while Clank sits on the couch and watches Binary Wars, snacking on computer chips before CC-5 joins him on the couch. CC-5 reaches over toward the stack of books resting on the side table and finds a book titled: Robotic History and Philosophy. He thumbs through the book until he reaches the marked page. The page reads: How and why did the human race go extinct? The human race used to rule Earth billions of years ago. Humans started a giant war, ultimatley nuking themselves to death.

This is the preview work in progress of an adult, sci-fi novel I am currently working on