#let them be codepedent together

[adamsrcnan]

i want to talk about how crazy this line "brown like the gaze that sought jean out in every room" actually is. because what does this mean????

jean has noticed that whenever jeremy walks into a room he immediately does a scan to find jean. so what? these boys are so attuned to each other already that jean actually notices jeremy looking for him?

nora are you trying to say that there's a shift in jeremy once he finds jean in any given place?? does his body relax? do his eyes soften or shine a little brighter? you're telling me it's a physical visible thing that jeremy walks into a room and his first thought is "where is jean?" and then what?? when he finds him he goes "ah there he is" and there's a shift??? in him??? when he sees jean?? and jean can see that? he's aware of it?? he's noticed it?? it makes him feel safe enough to associate jeremy's searching brown eyes (searching for him. for Jean.) with everything else that brings him peace??? like are we hearing this???

or am i crazy? am i deluded?? am i losing my senses???

[fandomwe1rd0]

OVERANAYLAZING AN OLD MAN AND HIS GRANDSON AGAIN BITCHESSSSSSSSSSSS

I think Rick is more aware that he is codependent on Morty, maybe not completely aware, but let's take a look at who exactly Toxic Rick was thinking of when he heard the phase "irrational attachments"

He was looking directly at Morty

Not looking up and thinking about his other attachments (Which he probably considers irrational too let's be honest), not looking at Healthy Rick, he immediately thinks of and looks directly at Morty

So, we already know that Rick considers caring about people as a whole, irrational, I mean this is Rick we're talking about, but I find it interesting that he instantly thought of Morty and not literally anyone else.

Now, this is partially because he cares about Morty the most out of all of the family members, this much we know, I mean you really just gotta watch the show to see that Rick and Morty have the deepest bond out of all of the family members, they spend the most time together, heck they spend nearly all of their time together, I mean consider how lonely they both were before they came into each other lives, Morty was just a loner at school with no friends, and Rick was avoiding all bonds that didn't involve his work, either as a freedom fighter, or with finding Rick Prime, so they were both pretty lonely, then they found each other and became inseparable

But I'm just saying stuff we all know by this point, I mean why even mention that Toxic Rick looked directly at Morty

...

Well, because that made me think of something.

It is possible that Rick knows that he's codepedent on Morty, so he might've been looking at Morty because he knows that his "attachment" to Morty is partically irrational, because codepedency as a whole just is irrational, even to the average person.

Now, consider how irrational it is to Rick someone who, without a doubt, attempts to give everything a rational explanation, he tries to apply logic to everything, even stuff you just can't apply logic to.

Now think about how irrational it is to need someone, to sacrifice everything if it means keeping them safe, to destroy their psyche, to do whatever it takes as long as they stay by you, to break them down until they are irregonizable, it's not rational, it doesn't make sense to need someone, it makes even less sense to need a teenager, especially if that teenager just makes your life more difficult...

Especially if that teenager is your worst enemy's grandson

The guy who ruined your life, who killed your wife and child, the guy you killed with your bare hands.

So why are you sparing his grandson? Why do you care about him? Why do you love him more than you love anyone else, including yourself?

...

Why are you codependent on him?

It doesn't make sense, it doesn't make sense, it doesn't make sense.

And that's exactly what Rick thinks

every

fucking

day

[disaster-theysbian]

Because @morningsolitude has specifically requested it, here is the rest of the Useless Lesbian Story of how my partner and I got together.

Quick backstory, we'd been friends for a year or so before having a platonic cuddle at a party. Then we realised our feelings weren't very platonic at all, and proceeded to dance around the issue for the next two months because... well, useless lesbians.

It started with me popping round to use her printer. Then it was popping round for cups of tea. Cooking dinner together. That kind of thing. We had a movie night where we shared our Favourite Stupid Films from our childhood, and it ended with a Very Awkward Handshake (story here )

Anyway, the following night was a Christmas movie night with all of our friends, including her brother and brother-in-law. All of them were getting ready to knock our heads together. Whereas the night before we'd had a sort-of cuddle under a blanket, we were so conscious of people watching us that we were sitting bolt upright and not touching.

Then our phones start pinging. A few of our friends started posting cute animal cuddle gifs in the group chat. We were smoking at the ears by this point. I went to the loo and actually heard her voice from upstairs (she never shouts, ever) calling her brother in law a twat!

She gave me a lift home that night and it was excruciatingly awkward as ever. But we both knew something was there, and we both knew that neither of us were going to be brave enough to say it.

So I decided I didn't have to say anything at all.

That week was Christmas, so I made her a card. A silver elephant wearing a Santa hat on a dark forest green background, bordered with holly and ivy, holding a single sprig of mistletoe in its trunk.

She came round for a cup of tea before giving me a lift to our craft group's Christmas party. I gave her the envelope. And promptly hid behind a cushion as she opened it and read what was inside: "Shall we address the elephant in the room?"

The next thing I knew she gently took the cushion away from me and pulled me into the gentlest, warmest, most comforting hug I'd ever had. I let myself melt in her arms.

I had come to realise, and realised over and over during the first year of our relationship, that I'd never known love before I knew her. Attraction? Yes. Desire? Yes. Infatuation? Yes. Codepedency? Trauma bonding? An innate, unmet need for validation that was preyed upon by multiple people? Yep yep yep.

Before I confessed my feelings to her, I didn't really care if she didn't share them. I just loved being with her. I loved watching her smile and laugh, and infodump about her favourite things. I just wanted to be around her. And the way she made me feel.

She made me feel like I was worthy of care and respect, without me doing anything in particular or saying anything in particular, or liking the same things as her, or looking a certain way. This was something I'd rarely felt, not just with romantic partners but among friends and family. As friends, she never treated me like I was extra special, never said anything cheesy like "you're perfect just the way you are". But I felt special just being around her. Just sitting there having cups of tea or eating dinner, folding laundry, doing normal shit. I'm not the only person who feels this way around her. She is so well loved among our friends because she so quietly, innocuously, makes you feel like you matter, without love-bombing you or putting you on a pedestal. She doesn't even know she's doing it.

She has given me back so much of my faith in humanity, in kindness, in patience, and optimism. She has given me back my own self, that I hid under layers and layers of people-pleasing cultivated by 25 years of toxic environments.

On Valentine's day just gone, I asked her to be my wife.

And she said yes.

[consultingsister-aa]

@theasteriae​ said: *whispers* do my url

LET ME LOVE YOU // ACCEPTING

do i follow them?: well duuuuuh who isn;t why did i follow them?: i cannot remember who i saw you writing with? maaaybe gold but i was like.... is this the seb i have been looking for all my life? AND IT WAS!! IT WAS!!!!  do we role play?: no we’ve never written anything together ever shameful  do i want to role play with them: pfft guess so whatever  an au idea for our muses: mm we still need to do 1920s stuff but with the g&g gang ! lex and cee and Sirius being glamorous but sad socialites  a song for our muses: for seb: lover, taylor swift (my heart's been borrowed and yours has been blue, all's well that ends well to end up with you, swear to be overdramatic and true to my lover) for sirius: lover please stay, nothing but thieves (so take from me, what you want, what you need [...] Lover, I feel your sorrow, pourin out of your skin, I don't wanna be alone) and for lex: the show must go on, queen (the show must go on, inside my heart is breaking, my makeup may be flaking, but my smile, still, stays on) what i think about the mun: my sister from another mister !! we clicked just so god damn fast and the Ophelia thing? the german sheppard thing? idk there was like ten more but OMG the amount we just clearly see for all our characters !! we are just so on the same page about everything and i’m so happy i have so many plots and au’s with you so i can just chat to you all day thanks so much ! you’re so kind and wonderful and talented i just love you  overall opinion: Lou has given me all these characters to play with and i am so spoiled for choice; i get to write cee in a loving mature relationship with seb, a sort-of dumb and codepedent one with Sirius, a endless supportive friendship with lex, a banter filled we love to hate each other sibling relationship with Aidan, a we-like-each-other-but-both-vying-for-the-crown thing with kate AND a mother daughter thing with xan?? im shook. you have been so kind to let me write with all your characters and im always so excited when you message me or i get a notification !! im crying now i just love you so much and im so thankful to you

[lalalinka]

12x19 thoughts

Okay so after FINALLY watching the episode (I’ve been busy, okay??) I think that the lack of a brother hug was quite justified given the circumstances of their escape. Though I found it hard to believe that neither of them figured any means of escape, supernatural or not, but I understand that it was for the sake of drama.

Once the Billie twist was revealed, I was so ready for Sam and Dean to say “me!” at the same time. But tbh, the way they were talking and with the line “We should talk about this.” sometime early in the episode makes me think that they already made their decision. And by the dialogue distribution and edits I was convinced they agreed Dean would be the sacrifice. I can’t imagine Dean agreeing to anything else. But then, I don’t want to believe Sam would sacrifice his brother, c’mon!

So I’m glad the show left that ambiguous, that way I can pretend Sam and Dean were hoping to find a loophole or another way out of this and none of them wanted to let the other die.

Also holy shit, the boys work together like well-oiled clock work. Seriously. How do they even manage to be badass on their own, they seem to be just naturally expecting the other to have their back. And also (and I’m really sorry) it kind of makes anyone else useless? And I’m not just throwing shade at Cas, but it applies to Mary as well, Crowley, Rowena, even Charlie!

I’m only really hooked on the show by the brother’s bond anymore, and by bond I mean the unhealthy codepedency. I don’t care about healthy. Healthy is boring (in SPN world at least). I don’t want them to make a reasonable, calculated choice. I want them to recklessly jump in front of each other to take the bullet.

I liked the episode :)

[seancamerons]

Emma can do better than Spinner and a Sean can do better than Ellie

i mean spinner is fine as a character i don’t know if sean is better than spinner. ellie i’m meh on bc sellie was codependent as all get out but spinner jumping into a marriage after a major infidelity was a weird call and i don’t think it’s fair to either characters to deal with that. 

(the rest will be under a cut bc well reason being it gets a lil long)

ellie needs to work on herself and become independent on relationships to bring her joy. spinner needs to find himself. emma arguably needs to find out what SHE wants, sean might want emma he might have found love elsewhere but at the end of the day  if they were to come together they’d be grown up and arguably different people than they once were. sean would have to let go of his hang ups about perfection and even emma’s reservations on trying to live up to the perfection she strived for in high school in order to grow up. 

no one is perfect in this love hexagon squareish thing that we’re discussing. its not that i don’t think spinner is good enough for emma, i just don’t think the relaitonship has much merit because it was just so quickly and haphazardly put together. that’s my main issue with spemma. it’s not that i dislike spinner, i have nothing against spinner (except maybe when he was super problematic and homophobic against his friend marco but that’s another story for another time) but he had grown as a character into someone great i just don’t know if emma is and spinner together are a good match. that remains to be seen. it was basically put together at the 11th hour with no warning and both of them had doubts going into it before they ultimately decided to stay married and officialize the marriage. i’m more and more confused by spinner’s behavior toward paige during #throwback thursday if he’s supposedly happily married with emma. why wasn’t he wearing his wedding ring in season 14 when he was hiring eli? there’s a lot of things that seem up in the air and maybe if we had a limited series or a idk a possible continuation of the story i might see spemma differently. 

as for sellie they just had codepedency which ellie is no stranger to written all over it. i know it’s no secret i love sean and emma together and i still do as of today. i believe sean and ellie were good for each other for that time period that they were together and anything after that was extra and unnecceary. they broke up and ran their course and honestly even if sean stayed in town post shooting idk how long sellie would last if sean had his own reservations about their relationship. if their relationship was strong, ellie would’ve respected that sean needed to deal in his own way post shooting and make amends with tyler and all that fun stuff that happened in back in black. it seemed like it was EMMA who understood sean most in that timeframe. i wonder what it would’ve been like had he stuck around maybe emma would’ve never fallen into hooking up with jay or finding validation in theatre or questioning her self and falling into a downward spiral of an eating disorder and a host of drama but we’ll never know. only fanficiton could give us those answers but ellie and sean would more than likely not be together in that timeline much longer than mid season 4. if sean were to have an emotional affair with emma while being with ellie that would be messed up but more likely realisitc but i don’t really want to get into that. 

i’ve thought so many ways to answer this ask. so i conclude with - spinner and ellie aren’t neccesarily bad people they just don’t make a great match with emma and sean respectively. i question the authenticity of the storytelling with the marriage. i wonder if they are happy. i wonder if paige and spinner are having a not-so-secret-pretty-out-in-the-open affair. is emma like into open marriage? she always had sort of unconventional beliefs and was raised pretty open-minded but i’m not sure if she feels completely secure. i think if anything they have a ‘hall pass’ where like they have someone they’re allowed one free pass and spinner’s is paige (or hilary duff or whatever i feel like he had a crush on her circa 2004ish bc he asked if paige looked like her) and emma’s is probably sean. idk if their marriage is 100% a fairytale but it’s realisitc to have some imperfections it’s not okay to have an affair behind the others back though and abuse trust. relationships are about trust, it’s sure that spinner knows a hellava lot about that given his past and even with his relaitonship with jane where he was on the recieving end. with sellie their major issue was codepency on both ends not just with soley ellie. so i just think it’s not that spinner and ellie are better than or worse than or less than they’re just not as good of a fit in my opinion. 

[fandomwe1rd0]

One thing I noticed between the Vat of Fake Acid arguement and the Rickfending your Mort arguement is that the Rickfending your Mort gets solved quickly, and the insults are a lot less harsh and less personal.

For example, in the Vat of Fake Acid arguement, we get some incredible personal insults, including:

Morty insults Rick's age "A vat of fake acid! Are you dying or dementia!?"

2. Rick insults Morty's life without him "What's that cool thing you did without me again? The awesome thing?"

3. Morty insults Rick's alcoholism "Big man, big genius, big lonely drunk."

Now let's compare those to some of the insults in Rickfending your Mort shall we?

Rick calls Morty a little gremlin when Morty says "I don't make the rules." Rick replies "Yeah, I do, you little gremlin" Not nice, but it's a lot less personal.

2. Morty calls Rick bitch "I got recipts, bitch." Not nice, but *cough* Rick deserves it *cough* again they are in an agrument, and that's a lot less harsh and personal than "A vat of fake acid, are you dying of dementia?!" (I love you so much, Morty)

3. Rick insults Morty by saying "Look at your face! You're so fucked!" But again, less personal. Then Rick accuses Morty of "cooking the adventure books" basically Rick says "They are basically like police body cams but you can't turn them off before you beat up a minortiy, or in your case before you cook the adventure books!"

This agruement actually gets solved pretty quickly when the observer comes in, and Morty even gets mad at the observer talking down to Rick. At the end of the episode instead of Rick tramatizing Morty for arguing with him, we get to see them excited for their next adventure together, with Rick saying while shaking Morty "Rick and Morty! We're back baby!" And even surprising Morty woth another gun (Entirely unprompted, he just wanted to surprise his grandbaby) and we even see Rick thanking Morty (In his own way) at the end of the episode, having completely solved their argument saying "Morty, I appreciate what you were trying to do, with the punchcard, my whole groove thing.". I just like seeing their growth, even their agruements are getting more civil (As civil as it can be considering who we're talking about) I love my codepedent little freaks <3