#let me pretend I’m not having an actual meltdown over this

[kookiestarlight]

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[sweetflanfiction]

Assymetrical Symphony - Part 8

Universe: Arcane (LOL)

Pairing: Viktor x reader

Summary: You had been on the rooftop with Jayce and the Herald and somehow you were sent to a place where things can be different with your help

Disclaimers and Warnings: If you want me to tag you on the chapters let me know! Also leave a comment with your thoughts :D Not finished, not proofread. English isn't my 1st language. All I know about LOL is from google and all I know about Arcane is taken from the show, so inacuracies will be plenty. I have a sort of idea on how to I'm gonna go with magic and runes, so bear with me. The reader will be written as GN (going by they/them) to get everyone involved, but if you see any discrepancies let me know.

AN.: Should I post this on AO3? Maybe? Thoughts? Or do you guys like this format??

Part 1 • Part 2 • Part 3 • Part 4 • Part 5 • Part 6 • Part 7

• ··········· • ············ •

“Drink this.” Viktor placed a steaming white mug filled with a pinkish, translucent liquid. You looked up at him, curious. “Don't worry. It’s just tea.”

Bringing the mug to your lips, the warm liquid filled you with comfort and calmness. It smelled and tasted sweet, but you couldn't place what flavor it was. Your brain was half turned to mush from the meltdown at the memorial.

Viktor had gently dragged you as best as he could to the Academy, not that you were fighting him. There was fuzziness that still lingered in your mind, and although his hand on your wrist felt like it had thorns, your willingness to fight had disappeared, your head tired and foggy.

Once inside the Academy and near the lab door, he silently opened it and led you inside, apologizing for the state of disarray. He had grabbed something from the back of a chair and mentioned a wheeled bench for you to sit in. You did, and he placed a blanket on your shoulders. Heavy, thick wool that smelled of mint and cinnamon.

You laid your head on the table, cheek touching the surface of it, your eyes looking out the window, letting the cold surface relieve you from the headache that was about to burst.

You started drawing runes on the table. You found, at some point during one of your worst nights, that the fluidic movement of the runes calmed you. Sort of like making lists in your head. Unless you intended for it to go free, it only shined for some seconds and dissolved into the air, creating blue embers that floated upwards and disappeared.

Viktor's eyes, you also noticed, behind the blue shimmer, never left the hand or the runes.

Looking around at your surroundings, you found that the lab was indeed a mess. Not that you thought that Viktor as Jayce could ever be tidy. No matter the universe, these two brainiacs have this whole lab in an 'organized chaos' situation.

“Your desk is a mess.” You noted, staring at a pile of blueprints, tools, and papers.

“I wasn’t expecting guests.” He told you quietly without malice.

You turned your head to lay your chin on your arm, looking at him as he sat in front of you, sipping his own cup of tea. A tired chuckle came out of your mouth at the picture of Jayce with a mustache drawing in ink.

“If you were, would you have cleaned up?” You blinked up at him.

“Maybe…” you blinked at him again, raising one eyebrow. He leaned into the table and smiled. “No. Actually, would you mind if I worked? I wasn’t expecting to come back to the lab tonight, but since I’m here... eh... might as well.”

“Pretend I’m not even here.” You told him, once more turning your head to lean your cheek into your arm and look out the window.

“If you want more tea, there’s more in the kettle.” He pointed to a small table next to where you sat that had a kettle and some half-eaten sandwich on top. 

You stared at the window again, waiting for the attack on the memorial to happen. However, by your mental calculations, it should have been done and over with.

Several minutes passed, the only sounds heard being Viktor’s writing and the handling of his current invention. When it was clear nothing was going to happen, you took a deep breath and looked at Viktor. 

(Evelyn Trouble - Made of Rain)

I haven't seen the moon in days... Been so busy changing my ways.

He had taken off his jacket and was hunched over his desk tinkering with something, sleeves rolled up to his elbows, and a small bandage wrapped around one of his forearms. The dark color of his shirt contrasted beautifully with his pale skin, and you noticed his vest hung open. His hair was a mess, sticking out in all places, especially the little hairs near his neck, the ones he liked to curl when he was thinking. You couldn’t help but give his back a sad smile.

I haven’t cried in forty days. Though inside I am made of rain.

Had this been another time, another place, you’d be leaning into his shoulder blades, annoying him, careful not to hurt him, only heavy enough for him to huff and puff at you being a nuisance. You realize now how much you missed this man.

Oh baby, baby, that’s ok. It has always been this way.

“I can feel you staring.” Viktor remarked, not looking up.

“You have no proof of such accusation.” You moved so you could lean your cheek into your hand.

He touched a magnifying glass the size of your hand with the tip of a screwdriver. It was pointing straight at you. You narrowed your eyes and scoffed, but the corners of your mouth tilted upwards. 

Slowly you rolled the bench towards his desk. The squeaking of the heels announced your movement, making him stop his work to look at you over his shoulder. It took you a comically long amount of time to reach him, making a curious Viktor swivel in his stool to look at what you were doing. Once you arrived, he shook his head and rolled his eyes, moving himself to the side so you could sit next to him.

“I am only allowing you to sit here because this is for your mother.” He announced going back to his calculations.

“Had no idea.” You placed an elbow on the table and leaned into your hand.

“Well, now you know.”

You looked at his desk, noticing the differences between your Viktor and this carbon copy of him. Less coffee mug stains, a lot more little notes, some with actual notes, others with his telltale hatching. His pencil cup was filled with colored pencils and colored chalk. The Viktor you knew was an avid fan of white chalk and charcoal pencils. Under piles of paper, you spotted a newspaper crossword puzzle half made, and on the corner of the desk, a dusty old framed photo of him and Jayce. You knew that photo from Jayce’s desk, not his. 

A purple pencil had rolled over as Viktor tried to reach for it and was about to fall from the table. Instinctively, you used magic to make it roll back to the inventor’s hand with a soft breeze. His neck snapped to look at you.

“What?” You blinked at the quickness of his movement.

“Nothing.” He cleared his throat and went back to his work.

A couple of minutes passed, and he seemed to have forgotten about your illegal use of magic inside the lab he shared with a councilor. You kept watching him work, his deft hands working with small wires and cogs. He was ambidextrous in this dimension. Your Viktor would be jealous.

“Thank you, Viktor.” You began, and he looked at you again, his pencil stopping midway through a note. “And I’m sorry.”

“Why are you sorry?” He turned fully to you, his knees bumping into yours. Neither of you moved away.

“You’re going to have to put up with a... healthcare provider...”

“I don’t even think Jayce saw us leave. Besides, you weren’t exactly... able... to leave for yourself. I would not be comfortable if I had just let you walk out in your state.”

“I’m sorry about that too. I haven’t had one of those in a while. I thought they were over..." You explained, soothing yourself by gently swaying the stool from side to side.

“Is it because of the…” He pointed to the hand. You shook your head. “Mmm, maybe you just need rest.”

“Pot meets kettle.” You blurted out and heard him chuckle.

“Actually, yes.” 

He went back to the tinkering, and you laid your head on your arms again, watching him work. There had always been something relaxing in watching either Viktor or Jayce work, especially if they were deep into what they were doing. 

There was this laser focus on the work; their movements became sharp and precise, and it was like they had honed in their bodies to only move when extremely necessary. Their expression changed as they worked, eyebrows furrowing, eyes widening, and a little smirk would grow on their lips when they figured out something or turn into a frown when they did something wrong. If you looked at them for a long time, it was like magic; their hands moved, and something appeared.

Once again, your mind started drawing runes on the table; this time you let them go. A pencil was being whooshed away from you, and when it rolled back, you did it again. 

“Does it hurt?” Viktor asked, not looking up from his paper.

“What?”

He opened his palm, the pencil he had stuck on his middle finger and thumb, and shook it. He meant your glowing member.

“Oh. No, not really.” You placed your glowing hand on the table, palm down, fingers spread. “It tingles, but… It’s not uncomfortable. It's soothing even.”

“Mmm… do you know why it glows?” He asked, his eyes landing on your hand, his paper forgotten. You chuckled.

This is what he wants: to study something new. You would happily oblige him; he had been incredibly accommodating. He had brought you to his second home and even let you sit next to him as he worked. 

To you, this—all of this—the sights, the sounds, the mess in the lab, the somewhat tired man sitting next to you—this was your normal.

To him you were a stranger; your presence was uncommon in his space, someone who was naturally yielding something he had only managed to create artificially.

“I do.” You turned your hand over, and the white line of the rune there glowed a little lighter. “The rune makes me able to…write…without physical means.”

“Fascinating.” He was about to touch a finger to your palm but stopped abruptly. “Will it hurt me?”

“I don’t know. Haven't slapped anybody with it yet.” You smirked; he rolled his eyes. 

Viktor grabbed a pencil and poked your hand. It felt normal. It was underwhelming even to you.

“So?” He asked, observing the tip of the pencil. 

“You poked me with a pencil, and that's exactly how it felt.”

“Mmm…” He ripped a little note sheet and placed it gently on your palm.

After a few seconds of it just lying there, with him looking at it intensely, you brought your head down next to his.

“Are you expecting the paper to burst into flames?” You whispered, and he looked at you and back to the paper and then back at you.

“Oh…this is…” He groaned and replaced the paper with his hand.

Your eyes widened, half scared of what would happen to him and half scared of what would happen to you. His palm was cold as usual, heavy and bony. You swallowed, taking deep breaths, waiting for his hand to turn to white and gold. 

“Surprisingly warm but seemingly harmless.” He said, taking his hand away, and you sighed in relief. He realized what he had done and looked at you. 

“I…apologize. I should have asked if I could.”

“It’s alright.” You cleared your throat.

“Would you mind if I asked you more questions about this? It will stay between us, but I think I can use it for the hex-”

“No,” you interrupted him. “You won’t use this on that.” 

“Do you know what hextech is…it’s a—”

“I know what hextech is, and I know how easy the hex-core is to corrupt.”

“Corruptible? No, no…It’s stable; we have been trying new things with it… and they run—"

“No, Viktor.”

“But... it... can be helpful to it.” He was starting to get frustrated, his forehead starting to crinkle as he narrowed his eyes.

“It might help, but what would be the costs? You’d add an unknown variant to a stable environment…” you felt proud being able to use his verbiage against his own argument. “The result could vary, and it could destroy everything. I’ll let you study the magic, but not for hextech. Not for use in hextech.”

“But…”

“I will not go anywhere near the hex-cores.” 

Viktor opened his mouth to argue, but after a while, he shut it and nodded. You knew, if he was anything like your Viktor, which it appeared so, there were some doubts about the usage of hex-core in more unstable scenarios. 

From where you were, it seemed the hex-core hadn’t been corrupted yet, but his leg had still been enhanced, which meant that the possibility was there. And you knew he knew that. Nothing was ever just pure. There is always a way to corrupt the incorruptible if anyone tries hard enough.

“I accept your terms.” 

“Good. Give me the notebook.” You mentioned the new notebook, and he slid it to you. You turned it over to the last page, writing something on it.

“Read it and sign it.” You gave him back the notebook and the pen you were holding.

“What?” He looked at what was written on it, his golden eyes moving through the lines. “I, Viktor, co-creator of Hextech, agree to investigate the matter previously discussed without using it to further my investigation of the hex-core.”

Viktor raised an eyebrow and looked at you, his face blank, unimpressed. You, on the other hand, smiled triumphantly.

“This does not look very legally binding.” He tilted his head to the side, still looking at the book.

“It may not look official, but it could be used against you after you sign it as an informal commercial agreement.” You added.

“No. To be an informal commercial agreement, I will have to receive something in return.”

“Alright. Write down what you want then.”

Without second thoughts, he grabbed the pen and scribbled something on the page, passing it over to you.

“In exchange, the subject of the study will be available whenever and answer all the questions asked truthfully.” You mentioned the pen, and he handed it to you.

You added ‘possible’ after ‘whenever and showed it to him.

“I’m not about to be woken up after you figure something out in the wee hours of the morning.” You explained.

“Eh...fair...”

He did a little VK on the side of the page, and you did your own signature.

“I guess we have a deal.” Viktor smirked, excitement contained behind his amber eyes.

• ············ •

“So…nothing happened?” Your mother asked, still in her sleeping attire, a purple silk robe wrapped around herself.

“Nope.” You drank some tea from the delicate yellow cup.

It was still early in the morning, but you had places to be at. When you asked Viktor when they should start, he mentioned the earliest convenience, pointing to the ‘contract.’ So, you had woken up before the sun came up and were already ready to leave, only stopping by the kitchen for breakfast. Everything was quiet until your sleepy mother walked in asking all kinds of questions.

“So, what now?” She was leaning on the kitchen counter, arms crossed, chewing on some vanilla cookies Voltaire had dropped.

“I don’t know.” You sighed. “I was counting on the events being the same and going from there.”

“I guess it’s good you're a musician…” You looked at her. “You’ll be playing it by ear.”

“Oh…by the gods…Mother…” You snorted and got up from the table as she snickered at the bad joke. 

“What? That was funny.”

You kissed her forehead and walked away from her, laughing on your way to the Academy.

• ············ • ············ •

@marshy-moo @victormydarling @blueesmiski @th3stup1dcat @22carolina08 @httpstes @that-one-shitty-blog @disa-pointment @sseleniaa @moons-lighttrail @aysluxe @fae-doodle @kitewa @local-mr-frog @bakusquadobsessed @cherry-cola-100 @optimistic-but-very-realistic @seeksrsnn @thecordelialetters @notsaelty @lansy-4 @ayupfrogg @sammypotato @wnbrw

[daisyblog]

Wedding Bells

Our Story Masterlist Summary: Harry and YN finally say “I do!”,

It was the night before the big day. The day that YN and Harry finally say “I do!”. Wanting to keep the ceremony very intimate, only inviting close family and friends, the couple decide they would get married in a small wedding venue that was tucked away in the countryside of Yorkshire. 

Harry had been whisked away from his soon to be bride, by the men but Louis stayed by his sister’s side for the evening. The two siblings were sat together on the balcony of YN’s room, silence surrounded them as they enjoyed a moment a quiet after a busy day. 

Louis eyed up his sister as she sat in her “bride” robe, her now large bump poking out, her hand that held her engagement ring stroking back and forth where the little Styles grew. “Any nerves Tiny?”. 

She glanced over at Louis, who was still sipping on his bottle of beer from earlier on in the evening. “No…nothing…I’m actually excited”.

“I suppose that’s when you know you’ve found true love!”. He thought out loud, knowing his sister was lucky to find that type of love when she was young. 

“Good thing we didn’t listen to you ey?”. YN tried to break the serious of the conversation, earning a smirk from Louis. 

“I was so annoyed…and now look we’re sat here on the night before your wedding!”. Louis reached over to hold her hand in comfort. 

“You’re the best brother…you know that don’t you?”. YN could feel the tears rise from within her chest, the moment making her emotional. 

“Of fookin’ course!”. Louis sassily pretended to flip his hair over his shoulder. “Now less about me and let’s get you into bed before I have the girls pestering me about you needing your sleep”. 

---

YN couldn’t believe how her evening had gone from calm and quiet, to the next morning being chaotic. Her room was filled with every person possible, her makeup artist and hairstylist were being put to work. Louis had left once he could see the chaos about to start, but not before whispering “it’s all about you today Tiny” in her ear and placing a brotherly kiss on her cheek.

After what felt like hours, YN stood in front her bridal party that included all his sisters and breaking tradition, Louis too. “I’ve never seen such a beautiful bride before!”. Anne was the first to speak, as she wrapped her arm around Louis who was gulping down his tears.

YN wore a flattering white grown, that showed of her bump elegantly as it flowed down her body and left a small trail behind her. Her face was covered in light make up, giving her a natural look to her pregnancy glow. Her hair was placed in a low up do with a slight curl framing her face.

“You look absolutely breathtaking!” Lottie complimented as she dabbed her eye with a tissue, careful not to smudge her own makeup.

“I hope Harry’s got some tissues ready…’cause he’s definitely going to need some!”. Louis caused the whole room to laugh as he all held their tissues ready.

A knock at the door disturbed them as they all looked at Mark who wore a smoke. “It’s time for a wedding!”.

YN couldn’t help but feel giddy knowing that within the next hour she would get to call Harry her husband and she would be Mrs Styles, no longer sharing a last name with her siblings. The thought caused an internal meltdown in her head.

“Tiny? What’s wrong?”. Louis was the last person to leave the room before YN. He hurried to her side.

“I won’t have the same last name as you or the girls anymore”. YN’s concern was real, her bottom lip quivering slightly.

Louis couldn’t get but let out a little chuckle. “YN…your last name may change today…but you’ll always be a Tomlinson in there.” He gestured to her heart.

“How do you always know what to say?”. She asked as she pulled herself together again, not wanting to walk down the aisle with tear marks.

“Stop procrastinating…you have a man waiting to marry you!”. Louis playfully moved YN closer to the door.

---

The sound of ‘Ocean Eyes’ by Billie Eilish sang through the room, as YN and her father stood at the double doors. YN couldn’t help but smile as she watched Daisy walk down the aisle first with Doris and Ernest, both holding her hand as they smiled at everyone the walked passed.

Next, Phoebe walked carefully behind, Olive in her arms wearing a beautiful ivory flower girl dress as she sat in her mother’s arms. The newborn caused the other guests to ‘awe’ at her cuteness.

Lottie and Lucky trailed behind the others, but the little toddler caused some laughter as he tried to run down the aisle.

Louis and Freddie were the last ones to walk down the aisle before YN. The bond they shared really showed as they both wore the same smile and how Freddie gave Harry a fist pump before he found his chair.

“Are you ready darling?”. YN heard her father as he held open his arm for her. His smile matching hers as he got ready to give his first daughter away.

“I think I’ve been ready for the last twelve years”. YN marched his smile as she spoke true words. She looped her arm through his and they both took their first steps down the aisle.

As she takes her steps down the aisle, she couldn’t help but notice all the familiar faces that had come to celebrate her and Harry today. The people she will always be grateful for.

She spotted Sarah, Mitch and the other members of the love band all sat in a row together. But causing her to smile and let out a giggle was Pauli mouthing the words “saucy” to her. These were the group of people who she got to call family for the last few years.

Next, she spotted Harry’s uncle, auntie and cousins, all smiling brightly back at her as they officially welcome her to be a part of their family.

The next three faces that all say together was a pinch me moment for YN. There sat Niall, Liam and Zayn, all of them amused by her jaw dropping expression that she quickly covered up. The three boys that took her on like a sister since she was sixteen, the ones who she caused chaos with on tour, the three people who always showed up for her.

Before setting eyes on her grandparents and siblings, three empty seats reserved for special people caught her eye and it was in that moment that reality hit her, her Mum wouldn’t see her marry the love of her life. But catching Anne’s eye brought her some comfort as she mouthed “I love you” to her as she wiped her tears.

As they reached the bottom of the aisle, she was face to face with Harry who was wiping away his tears at the sight of his bride. “You look so beautiful…you literally took my breath away”. He whispered as Mark placed YN’s hand in his. Louis took his place next to YN whilst Gemma remained by Harry’s side.

“Friends and family, we have come here today at the invitation of Harry and YN to share in the joy of their wedding”.

Harry and YN couldn’t help but get lost in each others eyes as the registrar spoke. They both felt like young teenagers again, as they let out childish smiles and giggles.

---

“The bride and groom have written their own vows and wish to read them…YN..you may begin”. The registrar instructed as he looked between the couple.

“Harry…I could stand here all day and list everything I love about you. But I think everyone in this room has already heard it a million times. From the moment I met you, I knew deep down you were the one. You taught me how to love myself, you showed me love on a different level, you have been there by my side through all the good and bad times and I will always love you for that. Harry you are my best friend, my soulmate and I can’t wait to call you my husband and the father to our children. This is our forever and always”.

YN took a deep breath and smiled up at Harry, as he used his knuckle to wipe his eye before the tear escaped. “I love you”.

“Harry…you may now read your vows”. The man instructed.

“YN…whilst you come across as sassy, strong willed and a bit of a potty mouth, what others don’t always see is your loving, caring and kindhearted side. I’ve been lucky to see that side of you for the last twelve years and I can’t wait to see it for the rest of my life. You’re the most beautiful, strong and determined woman I’ve ever met and I love you for it. You’re my best friend, my partner in crime and as much as I can’t wait to call you my wife, I’m even more excited for us to be Mum and Dad. I love you forever and always!”.

The guests let out a cheer as the couple finished their vows, causing the pair to go giddy with a coy smiles.

“Do you Harry Edward Styles take YN Olivia Tomlinson be your lawfully wedded wife, to live together in matrimony, to love her, comfort her, honor and keep her, in sickness and in health, in sorrow and in joy, to have and to hold, from this day forward, as long as you both shall live?”.

“I do!”. Harry gave a boy-ish smile to his bride, one that showed his dimples as he placed the wedding band on her finger above her engagement ring.

“Do you YN Olivia Tomlinson take Harry Edward Styles be your lawfully wedded husband, to live together in matrimony, to love him, comfort him, honor and keep him, in sickness and in health, in sorrow and in joy, to have and to hold, from this day forward, as long as you both shall live?”.

Without hesitation, a large grin shinning through that caused her eyes to sparkle, YN spoke the words Harry had longed to hear. “I do!”. She carefully pushed the band along his finger.

They both beamed at eachother as they waited for the famous next line.

“By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife…Harry you may now kiss your bride!”.

Having been deprived of each others touch and presence since the night before, Harry wasted no time reaching for her cheek to bring their lips together. YN could feel them both smile against the others lips as they shared their first kiss as husband and wife. Their guests cheered and clapped as they watched on in happiness.

---

The reception area was decorated in fairy lights and Polaroid photos of YN and Harry were hung around the room, dating back from when they first met.

Harry and YN were sat on the top table, with Louis and her grandparents next to YN and Gemma, Anne and Des next to Harry. The newlyweds were in their own bubble as they huddled together, whispering in each others ears and stealing quick kisses.

With the guest all full from their three course meal and itching to get on the dance floor, Gemma rose from her chair as she was given a microphone to speak.

“Hello everyone…I’m Gemma and as the Best Woman I’d like to say a few words”. She glanced at Harry, before speaking again. “Harry…my baby brother who followed me around is married. For everyone who knows my brother, will know how amazing he is…he’s selfless, warm hearted and one of the kindest people you’ll ever meet. When I say I’m proud of you Harry, it doesn’t justify how proud I am…watching you grow from a little boy to a grown man has been an absolute pleasure. I love you baby brother!”. The guests all clapped as Gemma took a breath. “I will be honest…growing up I always believed there would be no one good enough for Harry…but the day I found out that YN had won my brother over, is the day I changed my mind. I’ve never met two people who are meant for each other, and as much as I would like to say welcome to the family YN…I think it’s safe to say you spend more time at my Mum’s than I do”. The joke caused a sea of laughter from the guests but also YN as she did spend a lot of time at Anne’s. “In seriousness…I wish you all the happiness as your family grows and I love you both!”.

Everyone lifts their drinks in a cheers and in agreement of Gemma’s words. Louis takes this as his cue to stand.

“‘Elle everyone…I’m Louis and YN has decided to be different and instead of having a Maid of Honour…she’s got me a Maid of Man…I know it’s exactly what I was thinking!”. Louis made the rook laugh at his attempt of a joke, only causing YN to playfully tap his arm. “For those who know us Tomlinson, you’ll know we’re a large family…I was an only child until YN was born. The day my first baby sister was born, was the day I met my best friend for life…from kids to adults we are inseparable and I wouldn’t have it any other way. YN…you’re a married woman with a baby on the way but you’ll always be my little sister and I love you more than you know”. YN wiped away her tears as Harry gently rubbed his hand along her back in comfort. “Harry…you’re my best friend and when I first learnt that you and YN were a thing…I was skeptical and went into big brother mode…but with some wild old words from Grandad Len here…I saw sense…and over the last twelve years I’ve watched your love for my sister grow…you have cared and supported her and our family though some dark times and I will always be grateful to you…but most importantly you’re the only person who could put up with YN’s pregnancy hormones because I’ve never seen something change so quickly!”. Louis’ sense of humour took a hit with the guest as they all shared a giggle, as Harry nodded in agreement. “But I wish you all the best in your long married life and your future together…YN…Harry…we love you!”.

“To YN and Harry!”.

---

Between her pregnancy bladder and large wedding gown, YN had spent the last twenty minutes with the help from Lottie in the ladies bathroom. But as she exited she was pleasantly surprised to see all the guest mingling.

She stood for a few moments of searching the room, she spotted her husband in the corner chatting away. YN made a bee line for him, not wanting to be away from him a minute longer than she needed to be.

YN slid up to Harry’s side, and naturally his arm draped around her waist as he pulled her closer to him. The couple shared a quick peck as they reunited.

“Well someone fookin’ pinch me but I swear I see One Direction standing in front of me”. YN couldn’t help but tease as the five boys all stood together.

“You never change do you babe? Still our number one fan”. Zayn laughed as his eyes scrunched slightly and his tongue poked through his teeth.

“I’m loyal Zayn…can’t say the same for you lot…eighteen months you said”. The boys knew YN was teasing but it didn’t stop them all from giving each other a side eye. “So is my wedding present a performance?”.

When the boys looked between each other but remained silent, YN broke the silence. “Well it was a try…I’ll have to get this little peanut to nag you when she’s here…you’re not going to say no to your daughter or niece are you?”.

“YN…it’s your wedding day…you’re not surely still going to talk about One Direction?”. Liam laughed as he noticed Harry give him a look of not to say a word.

“Exactly Liam…it’s my wedding day and I want One Direction to perform”. YN said with sass as she flicked her hip out and placed her hand on it.

“God I love you aye….don't ever change!”. Niall only encouraged YN’s behaviour, Harry could only assume it was because their friendship was so strong.

”On that note…I’m going to find Lottie again because this little bubba is sitting on me bladder again”. YN hurried off after placing another peck on Harry’s lips.

“And just think lad….you’ll have a mini YN running around soon!”. Louis playfully tapped Harry on the shoulder, causing the other boys to laugh at Harry’s wide eyes.

---

“Ladies and gentlemen…please welcome Mr and Mrs Styles to the dance floor for their first dance!”.

The newlyweds walked hand in hand to the dance floor, smiles beaming at eachother as wrapped his arms around her waist and YN’s reached up to wrapped around his neck.

When she gets that come-get-me look in her eyes

Well, it kinda scares me

The way that she drives me wild

And she drives me wild

They gently danced across the floor, both too busy wrapped up in each other to notice their family and friends watching on in awe, some videoing the special moment whilst others stood their and lived in the moment.

Beautiful, crazy

She can't help but amaze me

The way that she dances

Ain't afraid to take chances

And wears her heart on her sleeve

Yeah, she's crazy

But her crazy's beautiful to me

As Harry had his head resting near YN’s ear, he sang the words to her causing a shy smile to land her lips. After waiting twelve years, they were finally a married couple with their baby girl on the way and life couldn’t be better.

“I love you Mr Styles!”.

“I love you Mrs Styles!”.

Tag List:

@pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy @harrys-flower @platinumbarbie143 @frickin-bats@harrysbbyh0ney @chronicallybubbly @goldensunflowe-r  @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite@kaverichauhan @peterholland04 @panicattheuc @or-was-it-just-a-dream @hittiesontour@bunnyharold @fanfictioncafe @lilfreakjez @iamahallucinationnn @theekyliepage @indierockgirrl@buckybarnessimpp @ashleighsss @jerseygirlinca @fake-coolbeans @itsmytimetoodream@treehouse-mouse @mrs-anna-styles211994

[lightofraye]

You are completely so fucking stupid, just because people prefer jenmish they hate Jared? grow the fuck up. and you stanning a person who is mentally a child is pathethic. oh wait you are mentally a child as well, getting pressed over a fictional ship is pathetic. and don't act like you know Jensen personally or his thoughts and feelings. you parasocial fuck. get a fucking life, Jensen isn't a fucking puppet for you to use for your fucking para-sexual fantasies. you need to be permentally locked up in a psychiatric ward allway with your mutals and friends and the fact you pretend to have children when in reality they are your sock accounts is utterly pathertic, no ones actually likes you they are just humouring you and you and you fucked up brain are too egomamiac to realise how delutional you sound.

Wow.

Five, no wait, six days. That’s how long it took for my haters to find out anon asks was on and have a meltdown.

And look! Dehumanization galore! And yes, anon, you are hating on Jared. I’ve yet to met a genuine J2M fan who doesn’t subtly hate on Jared, because he stands in the way of their fantasies.

You say I’m being parasocial. Okay. How aren’t you being parasocial by wanting Jensen and Misha to fuck? Or have Destiel to happen, even though the show’s been over for four years and was never canon?

What do I do? I write observations of the human behavior. I never leave my blog to hate on others. Ever. I ignore my haters, even when they dehumanize me and then try to pretend they’re good people. I’ve tried to stay above it all, to not sink to their level. I won’t sink to yours.

Hate me all you want, anon.

You’re just proving me right, again and again.

Meanwhile, what do I do? I write about how worried I am about Jensen. About how happy I am for his career. Celebrate his joy with Jared. Then I talk about abuse, to help people notice the signs. To help them. I write about my family that I love dearly.

I enjoy talking with other bloggers, and I imagine they enjoy talking with me. If it helps you to think I’m unloved and unwanted and unliked, go for it. Let that delusion be a balm to your wounded ego.

Meanwhile, I’m gonna go live my best life, enjoy being a gossip columnist of three fantastic Texans, a cat mom, a writer, a mother, and friend.

Thanks for the talk.

[nicosraf]

I’m sure I speak for all of us when I say we desperately want to hear all your baal and lucifer thoughts!! I’m foaming at the mouth begging for crumbs, barking like a wild dog

Warning for major Angels & Man spoilers. I'm sorry for this long essay but I'm stuck in a lecture for this certification thing and bored.

So I'm thinking about immeditaely after the demons re-group and Lucifer leads them in building their caves. Baal falling to Lucifer's feet and swearing his allegiance. He says he's been fighting in honor of Lucifer's memory in all the time that Lucifer has been asleep. Lucifer is angry, though — maybe he slaps him — and he asks why Baal thinks that he's worthy of trying to continue the devil's legacy. Baal apologizes, says he didn't mean to continue it, just protect his memory, to worship him in life and death. Lucifer asks why Baal wants to worship him, Baal says Lucifer is beautiful, and Lucifer glares. Baal adds that Lucifer is powerful and wise, too, but Lucifer's already angry and maybe turns his back on him.

Regardless, Lucifer still offers him the title of duke within a few months. (He might be angry at Baal, but he's probably the most loyal among the demons). Whenever they're alone, Baal tries to touch him, lowers his voice, but Lucifer denies him over and over. It's only until Baal is hopeless, not even trying anymore (sleeping with other random demons), that Lucifer finally takes him to bed. (It was a test; Lucifer wanted to see if Baal would remain loyal even without the promise of sex. Baal has passed, but Lucifer doesn't seem happy with him, he never does.)

Baal carves a room to sleep in close to Lucifer's chambers but not too close. Baal starts modifying his body. He has a fixation on Michael; sometimes, he thinks of how far Lucifer and Michael might've gone in their relationship and pisses himself off. He imagines that Lucifer has become violent because of Michael. He imagines Michael must've hurt Lucifer. Baal tries to make himself stronger and bigger, scarier too.

Baal spends a lot of time beside Lucifer, sees a lot of his spells of anger and grief and violence. He offers to take over some responsibilities. He wants Lucifer to focus on being happier/calmer. Lucifer agrees, but because he plans to use Baal as a way to shift blame; whenever the demons need to be punished, he'll send Baal, whenever things need to get done, he'll have Baal scream at them. The demons will hate Baal and love Lucifer. Lucifer does, however, use most of his new free time to sleep and tend his gardens; so, he is a little calmer, and Baal is happy.

It takes centuries for Lucifer to let Baal actually sleep in his bed. One day, though, I think Lucifer wakes up cold and trembling, and he walks out, sees Baal, walks up to him, grabs him by his tunic, then drags him to cuddle in bed without a word. It takes another long time before Baal gets to sleep there frequently. Lucifer stops kicking him out post-sex; Baal eventually moves his stuff to a tiny corner of Lucifer's chambers, and Lucifer pretends not to notice.

Their relationship is rocky. Lucifer takes out most of his fury on Baal. Baal just takes it, sometimes unsure why he bothers being so loyal, but every time he thinks of stepping away, he comes crawling back.

Cain changes things though. Lucifer becomes a lot gentler. In front of Cain, Lucifer is very sweet and only playfully mean to Baal, and even when Cain isn't there, Lucifer stays a little nicer. Baal sees that the young, sweet Lucifer he loved in Heaven is still alive. Baal also sees Lucifer having meltdowns over Cain's safety, panicking and hyperventilating and pulling his hair out. Baal holds Lucifer tight as he cries and gasps over Cain being hurt or lost.

I'm trying not to ramble too much about Cain right now, but I think Cain mends a lot of their relationship. Lucifer is a little gentler, and Baal sees how hurt Lucifer really is. And they both adore Cain, even after everything that happens with Abel. Lucifer is a mess when Cain walks off on his own after the murder, and Baal is there for Lucifer.

So why is Lucifer still so mean to Baal in A&M? A part of it is an act. A part of it is trying to push Baal away. A part of it is trying to push himself away. Lucifer doesn't want to love anymore. Love drove him crazy in the past. He especially doesn't want to fall for someone like Baal, who he thinks isn't very bright or powerful or special. But.... Baal holds him really tenderly sometimes and Lucifer feels safe. And even happy, sometimes.

[moritashie]

"Will you go with me?" 900 words

huge thank you to @shootothrill and Thali from DC for their help <33

Tony Stark, Iron Man, is in his kitchen again. He has been coming over every day without fail for the past two weeks and has told Peter why, but excuse him for questioning the intentions of the gazillionaire suddenly being all buddy buddy with him.

It is especially strange, as before that, the only four interactions he remembers were of them fighting about Spider-Man. It must've been about this amazing superhero Spider-Man. Peter is pretty sure that Tony doesn’t know that he knows about those arguments. He doesn't understand why exactly the man is acting all friendly, so positive, so fake that it annoys him.

A lot of things began to annoy him recently. The way Ned is suddenly interested in watching sports, the way May constantly sends him random articles from the past two years and the way everyone seems to have already moved on from his uncle's death.

A knock on the door throws him away from his train of thought. 

“Can I come in?” Tony asks from the other side of the door.

“Go ahead.” 

Peter clicks off his pen and lays it next to the notes. The knob turns and Mr. Stark's beelines to Peter's desk. 

“A little birdie told me you still haven't left the house.”

“Didn't wanna.”

“Well, maybe you'll wanna when I tell you about the Expo~”

Correction. Five interactions. Four negative, one positive. 

‘Nice work, kid’. 

And only one that actually feels his. 

“I won’t.” Peter cuts him off.

“Oh, turn that frown upside down, underoos. Will you go with me? Pretty please? Please with a cherry on top?” He lies on top of Peter’s desk, beaming like a child.

“I don’t feel like leaving the house, Tony.” 

“Mm, But I need my crazy–smart intern with me.”

Peter squeezes the pencil in his hand and feels it break inwards.

“I’ve never even worked with you.”

Tony makes an expression pretending to be oh-so petrified, and asks in an artificially low, quiet tone. “Then whose name is in the credits?”

Peter is on the verge of blowing up at the man. Some things start to boil real quick somewhere deep down in Peter’s chest. 

“I’ve told you.” He tries to stay calm. He swears he does. “That I’m not your intern. I don’t remember any of that, It's like it didn’t happen for me, I CAN’T DO ANY OF THE STUFF I DID WHEN I–” Tears well up in Peter’s eyes. He feels a sudden urge to throw his notebook across the room full force when his torso is squeezed tight by Tony. 

For the next few minutes his chest rises and falls, his heart rate slowly decreases and the sobs quiet down bit by bit, as Tony gently strokes his hair.

“I just don’t get you.” 

Tony hums and pulls Peter into a tighter hug. “When you first woke up after the accident, you were absolutely delirious. Going in circles, asking the same three questions every five minutes, you briefly recognized May on a good hour. I was so scared I would lose you, and I couldn’t even do anything to prevent it. And then you got better, and now I can do something to… Still have you by my side. Not just physically.” 

Peter says nothing, but he ducks away from Tony’s arms and raises his head to look at Tony, who seems out of his depth, moments from having a meltdown himself.

“Cho said that since you don’t seem to be recovering your memories, chances are that the past two years are go– aren’t coming back. We can’t wait until it all goes away, neither me nor May want you to stay cooped up in the apartment because of this. So please, let’s go out together. It doesn’t have to be the Expo, we can go to some restaurant or, hell, even an art museum. Baby steps.”

“...I did remember some things.” He mutters.

“What?” Tony asks in a soft voice that leaves Peter unsure whether he didn't hear the question or if he just wants Peter to clarify.

“It’s not much just- I can count all my memories with you on one hand but– you were always annoyed in those, or mad at me, like when we were on some ship? How am I supposed to trust that we’re close and you don’t just want to- I don’t even know… And if we were, I don’t feel like the person you are talking about.” 

The man’s eyes are glossy, and Peter wants the floor to swallow him whole. 

“I am so sorry Pete. I don’t know how to–  I can only promise you, I care about you. More than I thought I would care about anyone. I want you to go back to being happy and healthy, and learn to live with everything. And you are still you, memories or not. I see it every time I come over.”

He takes a deep breath as he carefully assembles the next sentences.

“I’ve researched support groups for people with amnesia, you're not the only one feeling this way. One is here, in Queens, could you at least consider trying? Once?” Peter hides his face in his knees, and Tony’s already bracing himself for refusal when the teen quietly mumbles.

“Will you go with me?”

Tony smiles. “I would love to.”

[rose-tinting]

the amount of misinformation that has been circling outside of neopets circles I swear

I see a new rumor every time

“They’re free from nft bros” Nope. Owned by one!

“The original team rebought them” God fucking no and you should not want them to, Adam Powells little meltdown over neopets users criticizing his new crypto venture is reason enough lol.

“The company was sold to Neopets Internal Teams” They sold it to the guy who used to head the former NFT project and are promising this means TNT has more freedom “under new leadership“ with “no current plans for crypto/NFTs” (This is not a promise not to make them)

One of the “brand ambassadors” who is supposed to help TNT with the knowing and understanding the userbase is some celebrity who’s wife is also a celebrity who I’ve seen people CLAIM used to be a Neopets mod. Does that sound like a neopets user who can tell the neopets team what the average user wants? No call for users who aren’t celebrities to become brand ambassadors has been made afaik.

Current Neopets mods are silencing trans people for mentioning HRT as well as top surgery and ignoring cis people talking about pregnancy, death, and surgery. (Have seen these boards go on for several hours and never get deleted even after a heated debate on one one about abortion) 

There’s items and backstory on the site that are racist. Neopets users have asked these be addressed. Do you think this “brand ambassador” will address any of that? Why does the ambassador need to be a celebrity? Unless the actual intent is to have “ambassadors” who sell neopets as a brand to the potential new userbase and isn’t about “listening to the users” at all.

god can one person with a huge following please for once just reblog and acknowledge the TRUTH. (doesn’t have to be from me I’d just like the actual info to be spread!) Awareness will help us keep the worst from happening! Pretending everything is fine until it isn’t is NOT the way!

If you want the actual info on the site Neopets has a fansite dedicated to reporting Neopets news including everything TNT tries to sweep under the rug

https://www.jellyneo.net/?comments=14391

A direct quote from their article on this

“ New CEO of Neopets is Dominic Law, who previously headed the Neopets Metaverse and brokered a "management buyout deal" “

Please if you’re reading this

stop spreading misinformation

spread the real information

make your own post even

this could go either way right now

this is not a “neopets renaissance”

this is a crossroads and we don’t know where we’re going yet. It could be great, or it could be the end of the site.

(Editing my reblog in so it can hopefully get seen too, I was provided with more accurate info on the brand ambassador.)

@pirakeet Thanks! Was actually hoping someone COULD correct this :3 Cause I was REALLY HOPING it wasn’t what it seemed since all I could find was a twitter post with an attached video where he accepts it (I immediately fled twitter may be why)

[Image Text ID]  Posted by tumblr user pirakeet: I’m not correcting anything, but just letting you know the “brand  ambassador” program has been made available - just presumably not in  the ‘john legend’ sense:  https://portal.neopets.com/brand-ambassador-program  and for clarity, i’ve been popping off about the difference, this isn’t a  “gotcha moment”.   There’s more info when you click “apply” and it takes you to a google  doc [End Id]

As I said I’m more interested in the truth being spread so I hope this can be seen!

[ninyard]

Towning bedroom hcs? 💖

- Browning doesn’t know how to decorate and Towns knew if he left him in charge they would end up with an IKEA kallax unit in their bedroom and he just couldn’t let that happen. They have way too many throw pillows on their bed and the only thing Browning had an input on was the wallpaper choice and the curtains <3

(jk)

I hope to god u meant. bedroom bedroom hcs because I’m going to say somethings about these fictional men that is kind of stupid for characters that don’t even have first names in canon

- They were already living together for a while before they started dating. And when I say dating I mean like,,, dinner dates and going to see movies without having kissed or hooked up or anything. Browning didn’t even realise they were actual dates until a couple dates in because he’s literally useless sometimes, even though he thought to himself, “Wow, I wish this was a date,” while Towns was thinking “I can’t believe we’re on a date rn”. They were hanging out at Brownings apartment after he’d cooked them a meal, watching a movie with a glass of wine before Towns asked if he could kiss him. Browning got so flustered that he got up to start cleaning the dishes, Towns thought he was rejecting him, until he came back over like “wait, you scared me, can you ask me again?” And Towns looked up at him and smiled and asked again and he just blubbed out, “I’ve been waiting for you to ask me that for months”

- They're hanging out, getting a bit wine-tipsy in the living room, when Browning blurts out that he's never given anyone a blowjob. His shy ass instantly regrets it when Towns starts laughing, but he's not laughing at him. He tries to explain what's so funny about it while Browning hides in his hands, and regrets his entire existence. He says something along the lines of, "Are you looking for a lesson or to practice?" while Austin in literally screaming with embarrassment, but he stops him, kisses him, and asks him again.

- God bless him like. It’s not great. And that is not a reflection on him nor is it an embarrassing or terrible thing; it’s just that he really has no idea what he’s doing. But Sam loves it. At no point does he make him feel bad about it, or genuinely laugh at him over it. He loves how his cheeks flush. He loves to be the teacher for a little while.

- he tries not to be condescending or patronising when it comes to those early days of them having sex, but it's hard for Browning to understand that when he has so much weird catholic guilt around the things that he's doing, and he's so self concious that he's doing something strange or weird when he’s not. Even when Towns assures him it’s fine, it takes a good few tries before he understands that that is the truth, and Sam isn’t lying to him just to make him feel better. It’s adorable to him; He watches Browning at work, owning a room, smart and savvy, knowing how to talk his way out of anything, but as soon as Towns asks him what he’s into he becomes a blubbering bright red ball of embarrassment.

- (Towns used his handcuffs on him ONCE. He pretended to lose the key and it was funny for 0.05 seconds until Browning LOST HIS SHIT about how embarrassing it was going to be to call the fire department to get him out of them. He was about two seconds away from having a meltdown crying “stop laughing please oh my god it’s not funny!” while Towns couldn’t stop laughing before he told him he was kidding. It’s the longest silent treatment he’s been given in their relationship, and Browning was still red in the face for hours afterwards.)

- Towns does not dare mentioning toys around him until they’ve been dating for like. A year. Browning would’ve killed himself on the spot at the thought if he’d mentioned it any earlier

- that’s an exaggeration, okay, because he really gets soo much more comfortable in himself after a month of two of them being together. it’s like. A beautiful sexual chrysalis. He loves Towns, and there’s nobody in the world that makes him feel comfortable like he does, so eventually he really relaxes into it.

- Still cringes if Towns says “cock ring” around him tho. but he’s getting better!!!!!

- first time Browning tops, a year or two into things. I was imagining a scenario in which Browning is having like. An awful day. And he’s usually the upbeat one in the office, the happy one. He’s not that sensitive when he’s in work mode, and he’s far more likely to get sad over things than angry. He can leave work in work and move on with his day. He’s generally really good at that. But EVERYTHING is going wrong. A case gets taken off him because he’s too invested, he finds out about a conflict of interest that makes another case difficult, he finds out that evidence he was really relying on broke the chain of custody somewhere along the line and can’t be used anymore. He’s swamped with work. He’s dealing with asshole witnesses. Losing witnesses. Somebody stole his lunch out of the staff fridge. One thing on top of another on top of another. Just not a good day at all. And he’s pissed.

he gets home and he rants like he has never ranted before. He’s yelling, he’s throwing his hands around, he’s swearing when he doesn’t like to swear. Towns knows it’s just work, that he’s not usually like this, as he listens to Austin rile himself up more the more that he says. But he can’t lie,, none of Austin’s anger is directed at him, so it’s fine to be a liiiiiiittle turned on by his quiet little southern belle yelling like a trucker about stupid fucking assholes. Right???

Sam says something like, “do you think maybe you’re overreacting, just a little?” and Austin is like, “Oh, f-,” and stops himself, looks at Sam and says with this look in his eyes, “Don’t.” Sam smiles with a, “No, continue, were you going to tell me to fuck off or to fucking stop? Or was it fuck you? Was it fuck you?”. They’re STARING each other out of it.

“I didn’t mean it, so I didn’t say it,” his accent is thick, voice still loud. “But you’re fixing to piss me off if you tell me I’m overreacting again.”

“But which was it?” Towns tests him. He can see that Browning is getting frustrated with him, prodding a sleeping bear. “Fuck you? fuck off? fuck me?”

“Fuck off,” and he’s not sure if it’s an answer or a request not to push it, but there’s nothing behind it other than a frustrated voice and a tense as fuck boyfriend.

“Make me,” He says, but Browning isn’t smiling back. He steps towards him. He feels the tension in Browning’s shoulders as his hand travels up his spine to land in his hair. He wraps his growing-out hair around his fingers and gives it a gentle tug. Browning kind of melts into it ever so slightly, Towns being his safe place, but his face doesn’t change much. “Or are you still too angry about your paperwork?”

“Paperwork,” He scoffs. He’s a little quieter now that Sam is up in his face, but that pent up frustration is still rumbling through every inch of him. He doesn’t look down when Towns hooks a finger underneath the buckle of his belt.

I’m losing the run of myself but,,, you get the idea. Browning tells Towns to get himself sorted and Towns is like me??? Cue the getting-out-frustrations-topping that Towns didn’t know he was capable of

[walkingintheheartbreaksatellite]

Hiiiii there! I really liked your Meltdown one shot! It made me think about Save My Life and if you wanted could you write something about that song? I had an idea but you don't have to do it. But what if Niall is having a hard time after 1D break up and when he meets y/n she basically gives him the motivation and encouragement to write his own songs and have a solo career?? Only if you want to do that or even write it.

Thank you so much lovely!!! That means so much!!!🥹 I hope this is everything you hoped for! I do try when writing for this precious baby.

Save My Life

Niall Horan x Reader

Summary- Niall was depressed. He was lacking motivation and he wasn’t sure what to do anymore. But one day, he meets someone who just might save him.

(Wrote this in Niall’s pov so I hope it’s okay!)

Niall’s POV

January 2016, London

It had been a long couple months since we agreed to take a hiatus, and the boys all got to work on their own thing. But me? I don’t even know where to start… It came so easy to me before and now? I can’t even think.

I decided to get out for a bit, and visit a new pub Harry had been telling me about. I decide to take a walk there, needing the fresh air after being trapped inside in an attempt to write.

I enter the almost empty pub and I’m greeted by the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen. She smiles at me and my stomach fills with butterflies, something that hasn’t happened in a very long time.

“Hey! What can I get for you?”

I smile and take a seat across from her at the bar.

“Just a pint of Guinness, please.”

She smiles and makes it quickly before she slides it over to me.

“Would you like to start a tab?”

I think about it for a second before nodding.

“Yeah I think so. But shouldn’t you check my ID?”

She giggles and shakes her head before giving me a smile.

“No need. I know who you are, Niall. I know you’re old enough. But not like in a bad way because you’re not old-I mean not that I have a problem with older people but…Sorry I’m just rambling now.”

I laugh and shake my head.

“No worries. I appreciate it. What was your name? I don’t think I caught it.”

She smiles and her eyes glow in the light.

“That would be because I never gave it to you. It’s Y/N.”

I tilt a pretend hat and she lets out another beautiful laugh.

“So what’s a girl like you doing working here, Y/N?”

She dries another glass as she looks back at me.

“Just putting myself through school. Going to school overseas isn’t cheap and I’ve got aspirations in life. What about you, Mr. Pop star? Surely you’ve got plenty going on but yet you’re in a bar by yourself on a Wednesday night.”

I let out a sigh and I grip my glass with both hands.

“I guess it’s just been hard since the band went on hiatus. The boys are starting to all branch out and do their own things and I… don’t know. I’ve got so much pent up creativity and no idea how to get it out.”

She nods and puts her rag down before she leans on her elbows and looks at me.

“So you’re in a creative funk and you’re unsure if you can actually do it? Here’s my advice. Don’t compare yourself to others. You’re your own person, Niall. Not Harry, not Louis, you’re Niall. And that is enough. Do what feels right.”

I smile a little and nod.

“Are you in school to be a therapist, Y/N? You’d make a great one.”

She laughs and shakes her head.

“Actually, I want to be a writer. But for now, bartending keeps a roof over my head. I’m glad to be of help though. Got some inspiration ?”

I nod with a big smile. I finish my drink and slide a few pounds to her.

“Thanks Y/N. I think I should get to it before I lose the lightbulb!”

She nods and waves. Her smile is the last thing I see before I turn my back to her and I’m out the door, heading home.

October 19th, 2017

I storm into the pub, as usual, but this time, I’m not as calm as I usually am.

“Y/N! Y/N, you have to help me! I’m freaking out!”

She raises a brow and sets down her rag as I walk up to the counter.

“Niall? What’s wrong? Why do you look so upset? Shouldn’t you be getting ready for your listening party?”

I shake my head and place my hands on the counter,

“I can’t. I’m freaking out! They’re gonna hate it! I’m gonna fail and it’s-.”

She places her hands on my shoulders and it grabs my attention.

“Calm down. You’re gonna do great! Your music is so unique, Niall. No one could be like you. You are one of a kind, Niall Horan. Your fans are going to love your album just as much as they love you. So don’t worry, okay? It’ll be great.”

I let out a sigh and I give her a small smile.

“Would you… Would you come with me? I- I really want you to be there…”

Her eyes widen and her mouth drops.

“A-Are you sure? I don’t want to impose-.”

I smile and shake my head.

“I want you there, Y/N. You’re my friend. Of course I want you there!”

She sighs and I smile, pulling her around the pub and out the door before she can argue.

>>>———————->

August 2018

I’m finally home from tour, or at least back in London, and the first place I go is the pub. As soon as I walk in, Y/N’s eyes train on me immediately. Her eyes light up and she runs through the empty room and pounces on me, hugging me tight.

“Niall! Oh my god! You’re back!”

I smile and nod, hugging her right before pulling away.

“I missed you, Y/N. I really did. Talking on the phone wasn’t enough…”

She looks at me confused and I let out a sigh.

“Y/N… I have feelings for you. I’ve never felt this way before… With anyone. I-I think I love you. A-And I understand if you don’t feel the same but-.”

Before I can say anything else, she cuts me off and surprised me with a kiss. I melt into her touch, pulling her closer to me as our lips move in sync until she finally pulls away with a smile.

“I love you, Niall. I feel the exact same.”

I hug her tight and hold her close, afraid to let go.

>>>——————->

March 22nd, 2020

I hear the front door open as I slump on the couch in the living room of my London home. Y/N comes in, a worried expression on her face.

“Niall…”

I hold my arms open to her and she climbs in my lap, laying her head on my chest. She lays her legs across my lap and I instinctively wrap my arms around her.

“They had to let me go… A-And your album! You were gonna tour with Lewis! A-And now-.”

I let out a small fry as I hold her close, running my fingers through her hair.

“I-I know, Petal. But it’ll be okay… I hope… You’ll move in with me. We’ll quarantine together. That way you can focus on school and you won’t have to look for another job. Okay? Does… Does that sound okay?”

She’s quiet for a minute before she nods against my chest. Things were rough, but at least I had her.

>>>——————->

June 2020

I sit at the piano, agonizingly as I attempt to be productive. Quiet patter of feet echos through the house until I feel someone sit next to me on the bench. Y/N. I turn my attention to her and she runs her fingers through my hair.

“You okay? I could hear you dropping f bombs all the way from our room.”

I sigh and shake my head.

“I-I’m frustrated, Y/N. I’m tired of this… I didn’t get to tour and I just- I don’t know… The most I can do is go live on Instagram… that’s not exactly a concert…”

She kisses my cheek and I sigh again.

“You’ll be able to put in your show, I promise. You’re doing what you can right now and that’s all we can do, babe. It’ll come to you. But you don’t have to do it alone. I’ll be here. Every step.”

I smile and peck her lips.

“I think you saved my life, Y/N. And you do every day.”

She pecks my lips a few times and loops an arm through mine.

“And you saved mine.”

The next day

I find myself back at the piano and for the first time since lockdown started… I feel inspired. Extremely inspired. I want to write a show.

>>>————————->

January 2023

“Please Niall? You said you finished it! I want to listen! I love your music! You know I do!”

I laugh and shake my head as Y/N clings to me with a pout.

“I’m sorry Petal, but I can’t do that. You’ll just have to wait like everyone else.”

She puts more and lets me go, folding her arms across her chest as she slumps on our bed.

“I should write a column on boyfriends keeping secrets from their girlfriends. I’ll get a lot of hits since YOU’RE KEEPING IT A SECRET FROM ME.”

I laugh and shake my head as I take my place next to her on the bed, taking her hand in mine.

“I promise, it will be worth the wait. Can you do that for me, Y/N? Just hold on a little longer. 5 months then it’s all yours.”

She sighs and squeezes my hand, giving me a small smile.

>>>———————->

June 9th, 2023

“Niall, please? It’s the release day! I just want to listen to it! I’ve only heard the bits you’ve teased!”

I laugh and shake my head, taking a seat next to her on the couch as I pull an AirPod out of the case and I place it in her ear.

“You can listen but I want you to listen to this one first. This album… I’m so proud of this one. This is everything I’ve ever wanted to make. And it’s all thanks to you. This is save my life.”

I hit play on my phone and she smiles as it begins to play.

Eyes are bloomin'

The floor is shakin'

Walls are movin'

Feelings changin' now

So, I'm rolling through it

Like I'm floatin' ten feet above the ground

As you float up to me

I just gotta tell you now

Ever since you walked in

I'm seein' a new light

Ever since you walked in

It's startin' to feel like

You might save my life

She tears up as she listens and before it’s over, I pull out the AirPod, much to her protest.

“Niall! I was-.”

I pull her into my arms and place my lips on hers, pecking her lips a few times before I whisper to her.

“You saved my life.”

She smiles and pecks my lips, cuddling up in my arms. I was lost before I met her. But she saved my life.

>>>—————————->

I hope that was okay! Thank you for requesting!!!! Please like and reblog! Let me know what you thought!

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Tag List

Those I couldn’t tag are in red!

@be-with-me-so-happily @swiftmendeshoran @babyiamperfectforyou @freedomfireflies

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@purple9950

[sipswithtea]

My therapist told me to start blogging

I semi recently got a new therapist. I’ve always had issues keeping therapists because I never feel comfortable enough to be honest with them. I always end up pretending I have nothing to talk about or can’t think of anything going on. It’s so much easier than having to get into all the bullshit.

So why did I go back? Well I’d have to go back to last year, when I had the fun task of having to find a new psychiatrist because I aged out of my parent’s insurance. I started the appointment the way I do with any new psychiatrist: I got straight to the point. I let her know I have bipolar and BPD, diagnosed since 2016. She tells me she’s not convinced. Mind you, this ends up being one of the longest psychiatrist appointments I’ve ever had. Those things are like 30 minutes MAX, this one was well over an hour. Being diagnosed by multiple other doctors was not convincing her. She told me she’s thinks I’m just depressed and suffered a lot of trauma, and that I need therapy.

She told me that in August 2023. I took the bait. Since I was diagnosed in 2016 I’ve had a love/hate relationship with therapy. I think I try to Pavlov myself into believing it works. But nonetheless, I decided maybe she was right. I had just gotten insurance through my job and I was finally gonna be able to see my *favorite* therapist that I had years ago before I had an insurance change. I ended up booking a session with her as soon as my insurance came through.

When I say favorite, looking back now it was definitely a Pavlov moment. She was one of my first therapists, from when I was 18-19. She probably was a really great therapist for my teenage self, because I was so detached from reality. I wasn’t nearly as self aware as I am at 26. So once again, it didn’t last very long.

I tend to talk about very superficial topics during therapy to avoid any further discussions. It’s much easier to talk about how annoyed I was at a situation than the fact that I had a meltdown down and bashed my head into a wall over it. I also hate the obvious “your childhood is the reason you’re the way you are” undertones of therapy. Like no shit. But there’s nothing to be done about it but move on. No I’m not gonna write my parents a letter. No I’m not gonna relive traumatic events in order to somehow finally move on. It all sounds like actual nonsense.

So I stopped seeing my *fave* after 3 months. I figured I’ll just stay on my meds and try to keep doing what I always do. I stayed with the psychiatrist for a few more months too. She ended up putting me on meds that I was on back in 2017. I told her that back when I was on this specific medication I experienced a lot of seizure activity. She told me since it was such a long time ago I’m probably remembering wrong. (Literally don’t know why I kept seeing her as long as I did I’m sorry) Long story short I ended up having seizure activity once again while on this medication.

That ended up being my last straw. This wasn’t just a small bump in the road. I was out of work for 8 weeks straight because I was having so many seizures. I couldn’t even stop taking the medication cold turkey because that would cause more seizures.

After I was fully weaned off of the medication I decided to find a new psychiatrist. I really tried to do my research this time so I wouldn’t end up in a similar situation. The only issue was I would have to wait almost 2 months to get an appointment.

Having both bipolar disorder and borderline personality disorder, navigating through life unmedicated is just about impossible. I know I tried. But life doesn’t pause itself no matter what’s going on. And that’s exactly what happened. Life continued. I was out of work. I suffered a loss in the family. It was all so much.

So I caved. I went back online to look for a new therapist. This was during one of my manic episodes, so I had the energy and motivation. I read through every therapist’s bio, looked through their qualifications. I tried to look for anyone who looked like they would truly hear me. Someone who would understand that my brain is very complex but I am still a person who loves and has feelings.

After a long search I found a therapist that I feel comfortable enough to express my thoughts. I am able to recall events without feeling pitied or judged. I’m not gonna sit here and act like I’m 7 months into recovery. It’s literally been 6 weeks. But I feel like I’m heading the right direction. I have a lot of shit going on in my head but I just want more than anything to be able to function like everyone else. So I’m blogging. Something I’ve literally never done!

[scaredoflizards]

Gonna braindump tophabe thoughts because i’m trying to figure them out… don’t mind me.

Some part of my brain wants to explore Topher crushing on Abe through having this very deep insecurity that Abe is too good for him because Abe is so genuine and sweet, then trying to over-compensate by pretending he’s so woke and well-liked to impress Abe so Abe will need him because Topher can’t fathom Abe just wanting to be friends with him, so tries to make himself useful and needed.

Then, when Topher felt that wasn’t enough, also began blackmailing Abe because he’s dysfunctional and doesn’t know how to be normal about wanting someone’s attention and asking them to hang out and was scared Abe wouldn’t need him if he had Joan. To Toph, the idea of someone liking him for being himself is unfathomable. There has to be something the other person can benefit from by keeping him around, or they have to be forced to still talk to him (like through blackmailing) or they won’t interact with him. These insecurities are directly based on past experiences he has had with the other teen clones, but then it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy where he pushes people away by treating them poorly in his attempt to keep them in his life.

Also I hc Topher secretly finding the fact that Abe has gotten called out for being problematic really hot because Topher is masking his own shit to fit in, so the fact that he isn’t much better than Abe (actually he’s worse) makes him feel a sense of solidarity, but seeing Abe face consequences for being himself speaks to that repressed side of Topher that also longs to be himself instead of making his entire identity an “ally” to fit in (and probably have an outlet for his anger because he can justify bullying people online for being problematic, let’s be real).

I think Topher is both aware he has a crush on Abe but also denying and repressing it at the same time because he doesn’t truly believe he has a chance with Abe and isn’t ready to accept parts of his own identity.

I think Abe on the other hand is as oblivious as usual to Topher’s crush, but unlike when Joan had a crush on Abe and would practically confess it over and over while Abe didn’t get it, Topher isn’t going to confess his feelings. He’ll just find excuses to talk to Abe or hang around him even if it’s to be unpleasant because he doesn’t feel he has a shot anyways but at least he can ride on Abe’s back even if Abe finds him annoying, he can use the fact that he is unlikeable to push boundaries to get any attention from Abe.

I think the reason Topher invited Abe to hangout was because he took an immediate interest in Abe when they first met and swapped shoes and Abe showed enthusiasm about learning about Topher’s clone father. It was probably the first time (at least in a long while) someone didn’t look at Topher with disgust and I really think he fell for Abe hard and fast then and there, but it took him a bit to realize that’s what he was feeling towards Abe.

I think Topher would eventually be the one to confess, and I imagine it in a scenario where he’d drive Abe to such a breaking point that Abe would finally try to cut him off for being “toxic” (influenced by Joan because she notices Abe’s lack of boundaries) and Topher would have an internal meltdown about losing Abe from his life so would panic. It’d be a messy confession where he maybe also spills a few fears and insecurities about Abe being this person who he felt was way out of his league.

Abe would be confused at why Topher treated him so bad because he already liked Topher before he started blackmailing him, etc.

I don’t think Abe would know what he feels towards Topher though. I think he does like Topher but never had to analyze his feelings beyond understanding he feels there is good in Topher because he was clearly drawn to him enough to keep hanging around him.

I think Abe’s inability to give an immediate answer would put Topher in a really anxious and fearful position while Abe figures things out. What he feels for Topher is very different than the superficial attraction he had to Cleo or his friendship with Joan. He needs time and space and Topher wouldn’t be good at giving those things now that his secret is out.

Maybe… i’m still tentatively feeling all of this out… i’ll stop there to think on it more. But now I am zzzz

[confessions-official]

i’ve tried to start crocheting recently and i CANNOT do a chain stitch. i just can’t. i’ve looked up multiple different ways, i’ve tried each of them many times but my hands are just. Not doing it right??? i am actually on the verge of a meltdown because What the Fuck i have spent an HOUR trying to do an allegedly easy thing. specifically it’s the yarning over thats fucking everything up for me. i am trying so so hard but i am ass at anything to do with coordination and i would like to have another body please. i would like a refund on my flesh suit or at least my brain because it’s really amazingly shitty at working like it’s supposed to. i am genuinely considering staying home sick from school for the rest of the week so i can keep trying to make this goddamn motherfucking chain stitch.

and i can’t talk to anyone about this or anything coordination-related that i struggle with because they’ll say “its fine, practice makes perfect, nobody gets it on their first try” and its like. okay but YOU are not experiencing this. YOU do not have to deal with being disabled even though 1) your disability isn’t recognized as a disability even though it is extremely fucking disabling which sucks because 2) i am diagnosed with this, i was diagnosed with it at a young age i will be dealing with this for the rest of my fucking life it impacts literally every facet of everything which makes it more infuriating that 3) mostly people don’t fucking know what it is. which makes it very tiring whenever i talk about it because i have to preface the conversation with an explanation of what it is. and whenever i’m explaining this to someone as a reason for why i can’t do a thing or will do badly at a thing they’ll be like “ok well you shouldnt let that impact you so much, stop using it as an excuse” because 4) most people do not consider it a physical disability. they just don’t! which is. kind of wild to me. because like. yeah the disorder that makes everything involving coordination 100 times more difficult DO interfere with my daily life, actually. nobody gets that. it’s not that i’m clumsy, my legs just don’t work like they should. i can’t even run for longer than a couple seconds without needing to lay down for a couple minutes.

my body doesn’t work right. thats it. thats the whole thing. it doesnt work how it should and that’s fucked up every single part of my life. “dyspraxic children may be more vulnerable to bullying and social rejection” YEAH NO SHIT! even as a kid in PE classes i could see everybody else doing things that my body just wouldn’t. i tried for years but i am simply not built for that. and of fucking course thats going to get you othered, rejected and bullied, which if it happens enough times will fuck up your social skills for A While. i’m not trying to mope around about it because i understand that it’s not that bad a disorder, it is disabling but other disabilities are more disabling and i can mostly pretend i don’t need any accommodations. thats fine. i can do that. its just that the fucking chain stitch made me realize “oh, fuck. i know why my life is like this.” and maybe i am having a very strong reaction about not being able to do a chain stitch but i don’t know. it was the straw that broke the camel’s back, i guess. like, i can’t do any sports or most art, i don’t have any friends, i don’t go out and do things and i can’t even do a fucking chain stitch? i can’t even do that? i probably will end up getting it in a while but idk. i just want to crochet, man. i don’t know why this is so difficult for me. i wish i wasn’t like this. i wish i was better. like, just in general i want to be better. i’ve tried but i can’t. i just want a body and brain that work how they’re supposed to. i don’t see why i have to work twice as hard as everyone for the same results. i know nothing in life is fair but jesus christ this is ridiculous. i’m very “sad, down on his luck protagonist who gets sucked into a whirlwind adventure” coded. i am. going to start crying

.

[thebat-musicman]

The Other Playlist™

I was recently asked to make a young justice playlist so here it is!

@automaticsoulharmony it’s for you :)!

The young justice playlist is under the cut with explanations for each song

Tim

Ur gonna wish u believed me (start of brucequest)

Yes I’m a mess (I could see him deleting his identity)

Karma (AJR) (depressed man)

Mastermind (smart Timmy)

Don’t blame me (all his action with the loa)

Fool (him with the Wayne’s)

Wow, I’m not crazy (him when he meets the bats (he is crazy))

Humpty Dumpty (he’s a depressed lil guy)

Good 4 u (to dick about Damian)

Pretender (Acoustic) (Jason canonically calls him pretender I had to)

Mister Cellophane (everyone forgets about him)

Come hang out (he’s a workaholic)

Let the games begin (Tim enjoys power)

Heart of stone (depressionnn)

brutal (it’s just Tim coded)

Deja vu (to dick about Damian)

Every breath you take (stalker)

The sound of silence (he is so fucking depressed)

Go the distance (start of robin training and brucequest)

Viva La Vida (Tim coming back to Gotham)

Bart:

What ifs (him going to past)

2085 (he’s from the future)

Bones (him running)

Everything has changed (him coming back to life)

When will my life begin (him in vr)

We didn’t start the fire (he is from the future)

Go the distance (him going back in time)

Iron man (time travel)

How far I’ll go (look it’s easy to find Disney songs about going back in time)

For the first time in forever (him meeting actual humans after being raised in vr)

Adventure is out there (very adhd coded song very adhd coded character)

Into the unknown (going back in time)

Dead! (he died)

The nights (it gives me his vibes)

Blackbird (finally being in the real world)

Record player (he’s from the future so it would make sense for him to find 2014 old)

Over the rainbow (going to the real world)

Wow, I’m not crazy (meeting the rest of YJ)

The DJ is Crying for Help (him wondering what to do after becoming an adult)

Centuries (from the future so he knows they will be remembered for centuries)

Kon

Father of mine (Clark sucks)

Dead! (he died)

Teenagers (it gives me his vibes)

All you wanna do (he was canonically taken advantage of by several women immediately after being “born”)

Oops! I did it again (player)

Too late (him maturing)

Used to be young (him after the playboy years are over)

Cat’s in the cradle (Clark still sucks)

You’re on your own, kid (horrible father)

When will my life begin (being in CADMUS and wondering when he can leave)

What else can I do (discovering his powers)

Pity party (he was canonically forgotten by everyone he loves after flashpoint)

Rip (by bladee) (I’m still focusing on the being forgotten thing)

Drift away (talking about the other superboy who came to be while he was trapped in another dimension)

Pretty fly (for a white guy) (he’s a player)

Uptown girl (Cassie!)

Rät (finding out CADMUS is evil)

Back to life (I think the name explains it)

Sober up (talking to YJ)

Shake it off (him responding to insults he gets)

Cassie

Just a girl (it’s hard being a female superhero)

Me too (badass woman)

Clara Bow (how it feels being a legacy sidekick)

Thunder (she’s Zeus’s kid)

Emotionless (good Charlotte) (Zeus is not a good father)

Brutal (her Bart and Kon’s deaths meltdown)

Cat’s in the cradle (I really hate Zeus)

Toxic (her about Kon)

I can do it with a broken heart (having to continue being a superhero even though her friends are dead)

How far I’ll go (her first becoming a superhero)

Last kiss (Kon’s death)

She used to be mine (her thinking back to what she was before she became a superhero)

My heart will go on (Kon’s death)

Eleanor rigby (her being alone after everyone died and she betrayed Tim)

Womanizer (Conner before they started dating)

Devil town (it gives me YJ vibes)

Yesterday (missing when things were simple)

No scrubs (not liking Conner before they started dating)

Two birds (her and Tim being the last ones left and her staying on the wire)

Sober up (her and Tim’s mistaken dating after everyone died)

I hope you like this new playlist!

[pb-loves-owls]

I keep thinking about probable old hexside crew adventures

and like what would be explored in them

like obvs Raine and Eda’s development together. but I’d love a lot of individual Raine development where we see them excel in classes. I can see them turning into the mysterious and cool new kid who just becomes popular outta nowhere. I can imagine them coming from a very pro-coven family. Raine I feel is one of those naturally gifted types of students who just do really good in everything (yall know the ones) but really only give a shit about the one. super smart kid. but painfully clueless. can not take a hint and can not lie in very situations. they’re also super sweet to p much everyone.

but Eda knows that they can’t be underestimated. they are much like actual boiling rain and will mess you up if need be. and they’ll look cute doing it!

but they also talk to Darius like “Eda called me cute and said I’m special to her but that doesn’t mean she likes me. I’m sure she says that to all her friends” “I’ve literally only seen her talk to you and her sister there’s zero other friends. Except maybe Perry but no one talks to Perry either.”

Alador and Odalia are the very annoying on-again-off-again couple who fight in public. they’re also the reason for a million of the PDA rules in hexside.

Lilith and Darius start hanging out more when their closest friends (Eda and Alador) start hanging out with their respective crushes/partners. It’s mostly to study but they develop a close bond. She acts like his big sister in a way.

Perry makes his way into the mix on accident. He has a small crush on Lilith because she’s been nice to him. He, Darius, and Lilith start studying together too.

The first bit of hijinks that the crew gets in is to break in to Principal Fausts office to burn the detention that he put in Lilith’s files, mucking her perfect record. Lilith had a whole meltdown from it and Eda is not having it. Seeing it all go down even causes the owl beast in her to spike. Raine is really quick to calm her by going “focus on comforting your big sis, let me do the revenge planning”.

the B plot however is Odalia, Darius, and Alador sleeping over at the school over a rumor about Grom coming out at night and wandering the halls. they basically bet that whoever stays last wins and the losers have to do the winners homework for a month.

Lilith obvs finds out about Eda and Raine’s plot and follows them to make sure they don’t get hurt.

they all find out Faust is sleeping at the school for some reason and is also worshipping Grometheus and starting a cult. Eda and Raine are the first to find out and proceed to freak the fck out.

The two find Darius, Alador, and Odalia in the abomination class. they give them the run down and now theyre all hiding from Faust. Lilith eventually finds them (they’re now in the school auditorium) and let’s them know that the authorities are on the way. she also chews Eda out for doing this.

But she can’t stay mad because she knows they can’t expect to hide and stay safe that way. so she devises a plan to essentially trap the cult.

Idk the plan but Eda would be taught a bard spell by Raine via finger snap. Alador would be able to show off how fast he can think things up, with help fortifying his inventions by Darius. and then Odalia summoning a shadow spirit and pretending it to be Grom.

By the end of it, Bump would be the new principal. He’d still give them all a weeks worth of work and community services but no need for the detention pit. and no need for anything to go on record.

[hostilehospitalbeds]

I don’t know what to do or who I can talk to, I've totally messed up the good friend group I had going for me here, even if they’ve all moved on and forgotten it I haven’t, they don’t even KNOW I’m upset with them bc I’m afraid of confrontation so even in person with the girl I thought I could maybe actually talk to more about what went down, when she said something that just crushed me I just crumbled and lost all coherency and she read it as me being emotional about the whole situation and I let her continue to comfort me like you’d comfort an infant having a meltdown and then have a friendly conversation afterwards about other things, when I should’ve said ���wow ok clearly this was a waste of time and I’m going to go now” so she’d know I was pissed. I did my absolute damnedest to clear up in the main chat about my original response to this guy bc I did phrase it really poorly initially. But the way he responded to my initial response was absolutely patronizing, condescending, self-important, etc etc but nobody seems to get that or care except one total stranger I’ve never met sent a supportive reply about it. And now I just don’t know where this goes from here bc they’ve moved on, they presumably think I’ve moved on, and so they won’t bring it up again and I can’t or I’m beating a dead horse. But it’s tainted how i feel about all of them and this was my fucking social network and support system here and they chose this fucking pretentious man in his 40s over me (really picking his fiancé over me bc she’s cooler than me) and now I’m just supposed to pretend everything’s normal anyway or lose this entirely. And if I’d just been ignoring the chat while at work on Friday like I was supposed to be doing already, had already determined I was checking it way too much, way too involved, keeping me from other things (I have it on the app on strict block during work hours now)… then I’d never have even posted the song that he just HAD to give his dang opinion on and none of this would’ve gone down at all. But no fucking rewind button in life. So fuck.

[creationfathers]

“I know for sure is laughing at your delusion while he's fucking his girlfriend.And now your mad because his fans are going to make sure you never get near him again.”

“No he doesn't love you. He loves the person he's actually in a relationship with. Who I am sure hides away to avoid your toxicity.”

People leaving comments like this really need to stop. This is not helping. This will never help. This will just send her spiraling further like she just has. She’s deleted the posts these comments were on now and just doubled down on her posts.

And this one, this person pretending to be Misha is especially bad.

“nowiburnyoutoash

These people made me aware you were in Atlanta with videos of everything from you broadcasting your hotel address, room number, and key code with an invitation to join you to the meltdown you had when you found out about the silent retreat on the other side of the country. Speckled with lude and lascivious behavior on your balcony and in front of your child, disgusting racist behavior, laughable "thirst traps" and having to beg for food from the same people you're so racist toward. I had people from the picnic you crashed send me pictures of you, Amber, while you drank their wine, ate their food, and let them entertain your child. The fans are the people I had to talk out of going over to that hotel or meeting you in that park and beating your ass. You should be nicer to them, not gaslight them, and pray I can defuse every situation you put yourself in harm's way.”

If these people truly know all they were saying they do on his posts and I’m not going to put people through every single comment containing way too much personal information that we shouldn’t know. If they truly know these things then they are also being very creepy. You don’t dig into his personal life and post it on a stalker’s instagram account. What’s worse is they all know this isn’t the right thing to do. People have told them in follow up comments and gotten ignored or blocked for it.

Don’t do this guys. This isn’t helping Misha or anyone he’s with, or his kids, or the rest of his family. This is only making it worse and unless you are truly stupid you know that. Stop caring about the attention this may bring you and internet fame and start truly caring about people’s safety. Stop this.

Those people are going to be the cause of Misha seriously getting hurt. Do better, people