#let me kiss him bioware. cowards.

[inkyquince]

I need my Rook to wake up sandwiched between Lucanis and Spite. Give me that nasty demon fade threesome, fucking me stupid over the bloody corpses of our enemies.

SO, after finishing another playthrough (shut up) I am FIRM in what I believe. Which is the following:

Spite fuckin falls first, Lucanis falls harder. Spite ADORES Rook, even outside of a romance. He doesn't even show this preference for Neve (i'm vindictive and this makes me smile. Neve is my least favourite- I DONT HATE HER, LEGIT, ADORE HER, JUST OUT OF ALL OF THEM, SHE'S AT THE BOTTOM. IM SORRY BABY). Spite even fuckin says he LOVES Rook if they focus on punishing Illario. (Don't even get me started on Illario holY SHIT "you picked the wrong dellamorte" brother you have a string of failed romances, sees his cousin in his FIRST relationship and starts scream crying. im so mad he's hot). Solas offers to separate Lucanis and Spite? Lucanis tells him to fuck off WHILE SPITE YELLS THAT HE HURT ROOK. Spite adores Rook and its PLAIN to see, even hurting Lucanis because he wants to talk to Rook. Also he's a bitch to everyone when possessing Lucanis and trying to waddle out, except to Rook, he's fuckin purring and wanting scritches. He shows how much he likes Rook in like... The second interaction with Spite? Even when flatly telling Lucanis that you will kill him if he gets to rowdy? Spite moans and says "Watch about for them I WANNA TALK TO THEM, ROOK TIME"

This is a poly relationship. Brother, that's just semi canon. Fucker, HE'S THERE ON YOUR DATES, NIFFIN HIM COFFEE. He giddily gazing at Rook as Lucanis says he loves you and then sticks his nose into the coffee. Lucanis is his and ROOK IS HIS FAVOURITE, THESE ARE LINES HE FLAT OUT SAYS. Hawke fuckin joked that Justice makes sex with Anders a threesome, and that blond twink frowns at you, i feel like Lucanis would just "yeaaah.... yeah." Mostly because he FULLY admits that he can't control the wings. Those are all Spite. THEN, DURING THEIR INTIMATE SCENE, THEYRE BURSTING OUT. spITE IS ACTIVELY IN THE SEX SCENE. Brother, Spite openly says that when Neve and Lucanis are together, he is mentally OUT of there. Not interested. Plays with the Wisps. Rook and Lucanis? Brother he's activating wings and bouncing around and giggling.

I like that he fuckin SNIFFS people, like Taash. I'm sorry, there should be 20 more horny lines from him, talking about how Rook smells. Everyone would be horrified constantly (Emmerich would be SCANDALIZED, Taash goes "lol same").

IN FACT, WAIT, BACK TO SPITE IN ROMANCE SCENES- ITS IMPLIED HE'S ACTIVE IN ALL OF THEM. When Lucanis and Rook first attempt a kiss, brother is GOING IN, and then, starts, pulls back, swears and fucks off. Brother, Spite said something. It was RIGHT after a possession too. Fuck, if Rook visits Lucanis randomly in his hidey hole pantry? "Spite, could you not.... Mierda." BROTHER?? HE IS HERE. I love Spite so much, he's like a grumpy cat that has TWO favourite people, a skeleton boy he likes to paw at and a well meaning uncle he can vent to (Emmerich. God I love Emmerich).

I like that he's Lucanis but just... Purple. That's my brand babey.

Anyway, yeah no, Spite would want to get fucky with both of them and Bioware remains COWARDS for not letting us.

[aduro-gayming]

they’ll kiss. next question

[chaos-monkeyy]

Tagged by @wantonwhale thank you!! This looks simultaneously more fun and more challenging than folding laundry 😂

First ship

Ben/John/Sarah Midsomer OT3 💖

First OTP

Thrawn/Eli I guess, but like... I'm pretty sure I'm too much of a chronic multishipper to have an actual OTP. They were just my first favourite ship 🥰

Current favourite ship

John Sheppard / anyone & everyone, including John Sheppard 😏

Your ship since the first minute

mmmm if this means from like.. the first minute of their interaction on-screen, that's probably a tie between Geralt/Jaskier and Loki/Mobius 😍

Ship(s) you wish had become endgame

..I'm not entirely sure what this means 🤔 Like, a ship that existed in canon but didn't last?... I guess? I still have no idea for this one. There's probably something, but 🤷‍♂️

Ship you wish was canon

Male Cipher Nine/Vector Hyllus, bioware you cowards you literally already have the dialogue going, Vector brought him to a goddamn orgy ffs. Just let me make them kiss already 😤

Ship that most of the fandom hates but you love

Thrawn/Ba'kif, apparently. Why is there not more love for such an excellent ship, honestly 😤

(honourable mentions to Sheppard/Kolya, Thrawn/Thrass, and Harry Dresden/Thomas)

You don't even watch the show, but you ship it

Jester and Fjord (thanks for that, Rev 😆)

Ship you wish had a different storyline

...Thrass/Being Alive 🙊

Favourite ship that's endgame

Dalinar/Navani. At least it BETTER be fucking endgame >.>

Also Aziraphale/Crowley <3 They count, fite me

oh no now I have to tag people 🙈 @starport-seven-five (edit: nobody saw that) @revakah @tessalyn @dedkake @draculard @that-one-stranger and/or anyone else who wants to because I can never remember tumblr names I am sorrryyy

(unadulterated list of fandom ship Qs below the cut!)

Fandom Ship Game Questionnaire

First ship

First OTP

Current favourite ship

Your ship since the first minute

Ship(s) you wish had become endgame

Ship you wish was canon

Ship that most of the fandom hates but you love

You don't even watch the show, but you ship it

Ship you wish had a different storyline

Favourite ship that's endgame

[sugarbubbleslove]

Dragon Age (again)

The thought of having a Remastered version of Dragon Age Origins? *Swoons*

The thought of having the Broodmother in HD? *Faints with fear* (or vomit)

It’s a double edged sword, I swear but if they were going to remaster, I’d be torn between squeeing in happiness (Tamlen and Alistair in HD?!! Yes Please) and Squealing in fear over the the Broodmother (Fuck that shit)

But seriously - why Bioware?! Why do you not let me kiss Tamlen? Why do I need a mod (That I can’t use cause my laptop can’t run games T_T)

But one day - ONE DAY - Bioware will give my Warrior and my Mage the chance to pick locks.

One day...

Cause as much as I love playing as a rogue - I really wanna play as my warrior Dwarf in this damn game but there is too many locked chests for that shit!! Give me my freaking unmodded lockbash you cowards!! Skyrim lets me pick locks while being a warrior!!!

and here I go again. Down the rabbit hole.

Elizabeth Cousland who romances Alistair (Yes...I’m not using defaults name now...)

Drake Aeducan...who sleep his way through Thedas...can you still have a foursome with Alistair/Isabela/Leliana if you’re not in a relationship with them...can it become a fivesome if you invite Zevran?! (Or do you need to be female and in a romance with Alistair for him to join in? A romance with Leliana?)

Lyra Mahariel who is love with Tamlen and refuses to believe he’s dead...awkward but hey - I have a good excuse. He gave her the dalish promise ring ^_^...why do I need to make myself sad these days?!!

Maybe Damien Amell...who also sleeps his way through Thedas...One question - does Cullen still remark on a male Amell in II? A male Mage in Inquisition? Or is it just the female Amell/Female Mage?

Melinda Hawke - Warrior who friendmance Sebastian/Mage who rivalmance Sebastian (Yeah - I’m sucker for this chantry boy...why, I have no idea but damn, I love him and Melinda)

My female Adaar who romances Iron Bull - there is my Mage one and my Rogue one...I’m still debating on her looks and her name. I was thinking Hecate??

Yes - I’m keeping the first part of the name, just changing the rest....^_^;

[abbeyfangirl]

dragon age: all characters (companions)

I’ve been in this fandom for a hot minute now and I want to update my opinions on characters :)

Origins

Alistair: super sweet dude who literally is not the stereotypicalchantryguyfightme. He’s a great example of healthy masculinity and I totally wish he was bi because I have an entire essay on that— also: he’s a poc! His mum was brown. In game he’s got dark features. if you really want a blond/blue-eyes/white guy, make your warden that. or accept that brown people can be noble and moral. or just draw cailan, idk. just because BioWare whitewashes doesn’t mean you should.

Leliana: someone hug my singing girlfriend before I crush her under with my own hugs. Also: nugs. Yes! Shoes. Yes! She likes how I style my hair? YES!! I honestly think she’s super duper and it pisses me off whenever someone’s like: yeah she enjoys killing people and the Game. ok. and michel de chevin willingly participated in genocidal marches through the alienage he grew up in with his elvhen mum. 

Morrigan: dirty swamp witch that i stan and also have a v big crush on. tiddies. Have a son with a GW so we can raise him with our tiddies out in the forest. she’s also white-passing, as her father was chasind and all people we’ve seen that are chasind are black. therefore, she is biracial. therefore, poc can be goths and don’t shy away from giving morrigan a darker skintone. if the devs had of been thinking, she’d have a darker skintone.

Zevran: Actually is the best romance, I think. Loves consent, therefore I will stan him so hard my skull cracks a little. Also: he is a very brown boy and if he’s white in da4 I’m seriously going to throw all canon out the fucking window. genuinely a good person who needs to be told so. 

Wynne: grandma who only likes my friends who go to church. but also super sweet and I’d rest my head on her bosom (in a platonic way omg ZEVRAN)

Sten: angry quiet boi. the bestest boi. I totally would give him a kitten for a gift and bake him cookies. Thicc softie. I think if I had DA:O and i knew how to use mods i would mod the fuck outta him. sorry.

Sha(y)le: who’s gender? idk her. See also: fuck birds and authority. pound ur ass into the ground you feathery meatbag little shits. fuck songbirds.

Dog: such a good boi. thicc. thinks Alistair is a whiny fuck and is Morrigan’s only friend. love him. he’s the cutest companion. bet.

Ohgren: honestly forgot about him bcc he’s such a shitbag. also: he could’ve been a really cool addiction recovery type but NOPE. probably would have a trump shirt in a modern au and would catcall wlw and hit mlm. no thanks.

Awakening

Anders: he acts like rlly straight but he’s so gay I can smell it. also he’s rlly cute and fun and I love him so much.

Justice: MAYBE i’M selF CONSCious OF THE twitchING. is the friend that genuinely doesn’t get dick jokes but is ur 110% ride or die.

Nathaniel Howe: honestly is sort of a white knight/neck beard a little, but it’s kind of charming with his whole velanna m’lady?? grump boi. annoying soul patch that I’d mod out SO FAST—

Sigrun: would have ROMANCED the FUCK out of her. why she even entertains the idea of fucking with ohgren makes me realize most of the writers are dumbfucks.png. peppy little emo. 12/10 would die if she kissed my cheek teasingly.

Ohgren: why. why. why. I’d have brought Shayle over. Maybe Zev? Definitely Dog.

Velanna: she was written to be an annoying feminist and you can tell but I deadass am a kindred spirit with her bcc I too am deadpan annoyed with Thedas’ general population too. love her. Would’ve loved to romance her. She’d totally be one of those who’d get all tsundere and be like “n-no i hate you” *kisses the fuckin soul out of you then blushes so hard she’s now a tomato*

Dragon Age II

Anders: fuck the cops. i don’t care. fuck the cops. (vine reference). also: do i hate him for blowing up the chantry that would eventually annul a huge collection of his people? no. read dalishious’s meta on Anders. v intriguing. didn’t they retcon the fuck out of the reported deaths too? like there was like eight Templars and Elthinia in there. Templars killed more “abominations” in a day than Anders in the game canon—

Aveline: initially thought she was fine and then realized she’s shit to my lil brother and I will fucking clap her ginger ass. See also: whorephobia isn’t a joke so fuck off with treating Isabela badly, you tit.

Bethany: sunshine. Literal sunshine. I feel my freckles grow in her presence and i love it. she’s my little baby sister and I’d slam that ogre so fuckin hard before it touched either twin.

Carver: there has to be a mod where both twins survive. I love them both to bits. My babies. carver is my bitter, angry little brother and I can relate because I too am very angry and would totally clap my own ass. hes so genuine and I don’t get the competition between Beth and Carver. Like, both are fuckin stellar in different ways. In this essay I will—

Fenris: honestly, I don’t get the general hate between him and Anders. Fenris’ main arc should’ve been a recovery arc, not drunken moping and revenge. he deserves better. give him a soft sweater instead of his spikes and let him love himself as much as I love him for MAKERS SAKE. like when you really think about their relationship, it could’ve been an eye-opener for fenris and finally some legit sympathy for anders. but we all know that if they had of teamed up that Meredith would’ve been dead before the end of Act 1 so.

Isabela: whorephobia is not a joke. oversexualizing your only appearing brown woman is so poorly written. how about we appreciate her and her lovely bosoms but also let people tease her about her heart of gold? her innate understanding of freedom? instead of just a wave of dick? please?? can we give her some pants for when she fights? can we accept that i fall for rogues who hate themselves?? fuck. also whomever draws her x femHawke x Merrill literally is after my own heart.

Merrill: my fucking babygirl MARRY ME. Fenris could’ve been her older brother type, but NO. she and Isabela should’ve been canonical gfs instead of Isabela/Fenris (no shaming the pairing tho!!). I love how she’s written as neurodivergent. V nice. Sometimes I just look her up and cry because she’s fucking everything. Also: she’s in the Dalish origin and she’s far from being white. Why did they make the most innocent/naïve character really white? hmmmm.

Sebastian: whew that boy. Would totally be that annoying Mormon at your door but you still let him in bcc he’s super sweet. Also: huge ass bible thumper and should get his head slap because you said the maker loved all his children why do you defend a complicit old hag you annoying attractive fuck—

Varric: totally is a bard and the devs couldn’t handle the idea of him being one bcc it might make him look less straight. is the only grey morality person I don’t want to fucking bash in with a fry pan. he sees people and I like that, but you totally know he’s siding with mages every time bcc him and Anders are like besties. I’m sorry. I don’t make the rules. “Professional Younger Brother”.

Tallis: I know nothing about her but she seems okay. I think she was an escaped slave and honestly? Fucking props. Spy on a shitting organization, idk what you’re doing, but your VA was that cool lesbian from SPN so I think ur okay?

Inquisition

Blackwall: Redemption Arc 101. Love him to bits. Sad dad bunwall. good man. actually atoned for his sins by actively becoming a good person. his initial design is 80% hotter im so sorry but so not.

Cassandra: was way browner in the last game. would romance the fuck outta her. I love me a butch lady who melts at my dorky recitation of poetry. BioWare is a coward. also is the worst choice for divine. but not a bad person. could use some more guidance or get her ass whipped by a dalish elf about religion or a circle mage kid whos like “yeah bud i didn’t ask for the templars to whip my ass everyday for existing.”

The Iron Bull: I think the Qunari/Vashoth were a little based off black people (the whole anti blackness thing where ppl are scared of them bcc of whatever reason) and it pisses me off that he had a weird ass dubcon thing with Dorian in banter. It doesn’t make sense— he’s an A+++ dom and would not jump straight in role play without at least checking in at first like wtf BioWare.

Cole: his mother was chasind so he’s like not supposed to be that white? or like biracial? albino? idk. love him to bits tho. He’s neurodivergent and I deadass love him. romancing him? idk. I see why ppl think it’s fuckin nasty but also like as a writer I’d age him the fuck up so fast before my inquisitor even THOUGHT about that. like idk. I’m down with him being a sweet little bro character tho. he’s a babe. love him.

Sera: had the worst fucking writer I’ve ever seen and I willingly read the twilight saga twice by a shit ass racist white lady who okay’d pedophilia. like. Fuck you Kristjanson suck your own dick you fuck. had the worst options in regards to speak to her. has a thicc case of internalized racism that literally most of the fandom just loves to use against her. my lesbian neurodivergent queen. Would write a thousand fix it fics for her. Love her to bits. im gay.

Varric: I haven’t played DA2 so i don’t get why everyone wants to romance him but like. a dwarf romance? yes please. Idk he reminds me of my uncle so I only see him as fun uncle material. Deadass should adopt Cole and Merrill and co parent with Blackwall for Sera. dads? fuck yeah. love me some wholesome, present fathers.

Dorian: is a gay stereotype that I love/hate so much. and he’s also just as bad about being a creep bcc he sexualizes qunari men (in banter). I attribute that to shit writing tho. I want to protect him from all the “omg gay best friend!” people. he’d clearly be that tired gay that wouldn’t give a diddly damn about ur het romance. wanna talk about politics? he’s ur guy/gay.

Solas: “me, an intellectual:”. I don’t hate him, but I’m not about him. He comes off as mysterious and suave (which he totally is) but I deadass would not save him from himself because he’s a racist, exclusionist eggshell. idk. not my cup of tea, but I can totally see the appeal. And he’s interesting, I’ll totally say that. “I think the Dalish are garbage but they made you” is not a compliment. it’s so offensive. and such bait for “quirky girls” which I’m no fan of. Would be Achilles and let Patroclus (Lavellan in his case) die before he realized how his pride is literally a waste of time. If he gets a redemption arc I hope Lavellan gets to slap him before getting him to teach all about ancient Arlathan and show that the Evanuris weren’t all total dicknozzles. (Aka I really have a hard time believing that they’d be slavery cult things. especially since they’ve compared elves to indigenous ppl, Jews and the Romani.)

Vivienne: it’s so racist that they’d make a black woman be pro-slavery. That’s such internalized racism. She could’ve been the cool ass “educate yourself first before you speak, fool” ice lady, but NO. the devs could’ve kept the “Templars are a tool that I proudly can mandate” and the “circles are very good education” and we. Could. Have. Romanced. Her. Like. Fuck. Sake. I just wanna give her a hug and say “love yourself omg!!” and not even in a romantic way. Also: she and morrigan should not have been so antagonistic towards each other. I’d expect them to have great respect for each other, as they both moved up in the world through hardwork and very little help. They could learn different magic from each other too and still maintain that rival respect “oh you” mood. Sidenote: probably the cooler option for Divine. if her approval is high enough she’ll love and be loyal to you forever and i can’t see her agenda being bad. she improves the circles exponentially and tells all the antis to suck her pretty painted toes.

Josephine: an actual disney princess. romanced her my first playthrough. I love her so much. she just makes me so happy. And she’s like: “Integrity, Loyalty, peace. That is what it means to be a GREY WARDEN good fucking person.” she’s the person who would let you hold her hand if you got anxious and she’d be that person who shouldered the whole group project with finesse and poise and would probably lie for everyone as to not be mean. i love josie. her and leliana’s relationship is so cute, too. whether it’s romantic or not: women supporting women.

Leliana: if you leave her hardened you must hate her. why. she becomes so against herself. i like how shes feminine and lighthearted because that’s so powerful-- to remain hopeful when the world is hopeless. (its hard to know when to soften her/harden her so i get it but. google it. she deserves to be happy and sweet again.)

Cullen: uwu war criminal with shit ass “redemption arc” that was actually a half-assed (at BEST) recovery arc. Recovery isn’t linear, it isn’t pretty, and even the broken need to be told they are wrong in order to heal right. Like I’m offended by that bullshit. I’ve had to do some mental health recovery in the past and unlearning lots of toxic ideologies— which I’m still unlearning— and it bothers me that he gets an easy pass because he’s hot. It’s one thing if you like Cullen, it’s another thing if you hold him accountable.

[critterbutt]

BIOWARE 

JUST BECAUSE YOU’RE A BUNCH OF COWARDS DOESN’T MEAN I AM 

LET ME WOO KHEM VAL 

LET ME STICK MY WHOLE HEAD IN HIS BIG TOOTHY MAW IN AN ATTEMPT TO SMOOCH HIM 

LET ME SMOOCH KHEM 

I WILL SMITE YOU IF YOU DONT LET ME KISS THE MONSTER 

[pregnantcornbread]

Mass Effect: Andromeda - Choices, romance, further questions.

So, I preordered Mass Effect: Andromeda to be delivered to me via courier on release day. Why? I absolutely loved Dragon Age: Inquisition, and loved BioWare’s style. The hard choices you have to make actually make a difference in the story, as do your personality and influence (not like TellTale’s Walking Dead series, who promote that your choices matter, when actually, they really don’t, the story continues regardless). In DA: I, I was a female hunter Lavellan, with not-so pointy ears (which made a difference how the other elves interacted with me), and a Ghilan'nain vallaslin (which endeared me to the halla herders). I originally romanced Blackwall, but when he left, I went full Cullen, a satisfying relationship filled with awkward coughs, innuendo, and drug withdrawal – and frequent visits to the ramparts for ‘alone time.’ I spent over 300 hours completing every side quest, relishing in new environments, killing everything bad in sight, trying not to whine when all the important choices somehow fell to me (including what is to be done with a man who is flinging goats at my stronghold) and taking down all the dragons. I never felt tired playing that game, the ‘fetch’ quests were fun due to the party banter (hint: if you have your romantic interest in your party, things get hilarious!), and the lovability of your party, well developed characters who don’t just rehash the same lines all the time (except in fight mode: “Solas needs help” is still ringing in my ears, after all this time). The DLC was quite well crafted as well (although The Descent is possibly my least favourite – why am I collecting mugs in the deep roads again? Trespasser had a great ending, and gave you another change to mix it up with your crew). So my expectations were quite high with ME: Andromeda.

After spending a quick five minutes deciding on a male or female Ryder, I chose the obvious. After having to play countless RPG’s as a man (Far Cry, Shadow of Mordor, Sleeping Dogs, GTA:V, Witcher), I chose a woman, because yeah, I am one. I spent an hour fixing my Sara to look like a human rather than whatever the preset was. My Sara, in the design part, sort of looked like a young Mary Steenburgen. Satisfied with my choice, I got on my merry way with the game. Upon waking up out of cryo, I saw everything that was wrong with my Sara’s face, the shading was shitty, the skin was terrible, her nose was way bigger, her eyes looked purple in some lights (instead of deep blue) and what was up with her goddamn eyebrows? But in some scenes, she actually looked like the Sara I had designed. Rather than spend another hour redesigning her face, I decided to roll with it and keep her. It was a good choice, because she looked like present day Mary Steenburgen with worse skin and a neck tattoo, and looked like she had seen some shit and could handle her shit, rather than some prim and proper pathfinder’s daughter who was only on the ark because her dad said so.

End game spoilers ensue, so please read at your own peril:

The following is split up into three parts: My choices in the game, romance, and post-game questions.

My game is at 111 hours and 98% completion. There were two quests that I did not finish before completing the game (excluding the medicine quest after Herbal Entrepeneurs, because it was bugged) – ‘Path of Hero’ and ‘Aid Apex’ (because I killed all the architects before I got the mission, and so had no option to scan them). Post game, these quests are no longer available to me.

My Choices:

Sometimes I would leave the game running for hours while deliberating on a choice. My first choice was whether or not to have a scientific outpost or a military outpost on the first world, Eos. As your advisors tell you, what you choose will reflect on how the initiative is seen in the eyes of possible intelligent life in the system, and will set the standard of what you intend to do in the system. I chose a scientific outpost – less “we’re coming to invade you”, more “we’re just here to live and learn.”

First murderer: I chose to release Nilken, because intent is not a crime, but I also didn’t speak to his wife outside the jail, so his secret was not exposed.

Vehn Terev: I gave him to the resistance, because interfering with Angaran justice wasn’t the right play.

Path of a Hero: I spoke to Kerri, but declined her offer, as I was just new to this pathfinding business, and didn’t feel that I could offer any nuggets of wisdom. Then I forgot about it and it failed the quest. Meh.

Reyes Vs Kelly: Both are terrible choices for leaders, but at the time, I wanted to see where a romance with Vidal would go, I played it out, and was disappointed, but in my do-over, I still let Kelly die, because she was quite evil. Even though Reyes was a tosser for cheating, he still seemed the better hand.

Angaran AI: I gave the Angaran the AI, because I didn’t feel right about keeping it for myself – and potentially angering the Angara.

Secret Water reservoir: I let the Angara merchant keep the water in reparations for the outcasts killing her brother, and to prevent the Nexus from becoming a thoroughly colonising body in Elaaden.

Drive Core: This one was a bit fuzzy for me, because I was also doing the quest with the AI saboteurs, and they were talking about Overload (I think), a program about a weaponised AI, and Drack was sending me emails about Overload Morda, so I thought that Morda was a weaponised AI. I ended up scanning Knight’s hideout a little too thoroughly, which made her people hostile to me, and she ended up being sniped on the Nexus. Alain vows revenge, which is unfortunate, because SAM made him walk again. After finishing a few more quests, I came back to Elaaden and I ended up trusting Morda with the drive core, because pissing off all the Krogan was not my idea of ‘peace among worlds.’ Also, after all the shit the Krogan have been through, the Krogan need a voice at the table – they didn’t even get their own pathfinder!

Avitus Rex: Rex became a pathfinder, because he was out finding Turians when the Turians weren’t.

Sarissa’s Fate: I couldn’t let Sarissa keep her position after all that dickery that got her Pathfinder killed. It may not have been the smart move, but although she was the best person for the job, a huntress without her squad’s support will not go far. Also, I don’t think I could have looked at Cora if I agreed to lie to everyone about it. If Tann (number eight in line) can be the director, why can’t Valderia?

Salarian doctor: Ehh, what a moral dropkick. He got jail.

Exaltation facility: I let it stand, for further help in the final mission.

Salarian Pathfinder: This one was heartbreaking. A female Salarian who is an actual trained pathfinder (would have been the only one in my crew), who is captured trying to rescue her people despite my commands to get the f out of there vs Drack’s dime a dozen Krogan scouts. I had planned on saving the Krogan scouts beforehand, and had Drack in my party, but while I was doing this mission, I was really torn. If I choose the Salarian, the Krogan won’t trust or respect me, but if I chose the scouts, I would get further support from the Krogan, with no real consequences on the Salarian side. Whatever I chose, I would be taking a side, with consequences down the line. I went with ‘Krogan lives matter,’ despite sacrificing the most badass Salarian, ever. I mean, every Salarian would want to mate with her just for the prestige!

Kill code: While it may come to bite me in DLC or sequels, I used it, just to get it out of the way. I don’t trust Primus to honour his deal in the future.

Ambassador: I loved Morda for the choice (just to spite Tann), and Bradley would have been a good second, but I ended up conceding power to the Moshae, I believe she was the smart choice. Although I had enough of a presence to unite the Angara and the Initiative, the Moshae would not be swayed by outside or inside influence. If I chose Hayjer, the Krogan would hate me, as much as “Krogan lives matter,” Morda would only act in favour of the Krogan and Clan Nackmor, and possibly make a heated attack against the Salarians/Turians in retaliation for the genophage, and Bradley, well, I could be accused of being specist.    

  Romance:

This is where I think the game could use improvements. It is pretty disappointing if you are FemRyder or a MaleRyder who doesn’t romance Cora (the extreme effort put in this relationship compared to the minimal effort of the others is quite disappointing – they actually kiss properly and there’s thrusting!).

Look at those two humanoids realistically kissing!

The lack of dialogue choices means that relationships become boring and quickly. While in DA:I, the cut away sex scenes did hold a little to imagination, that fact that you could go and talk to your interest during long, arduous missions and sneak away for a little kiss cut scene helped keep your interest in them, and having them in your party was always a hilarious time (“Keep your eyes off the Inquistor’s behind!”). While playing the game, you get a sense of your SO and your squadmates, their endearing and not-so endearing traits, it almost felt like they’re almost real people. DA:I is a well-fleshed out, well-written RPG, and the relationships are defining trait of this game – I’m sure that if all there was to do was going around killing things, I probably wouldn’t care. Instead, you help Cullen get off his lyrium addiction, let Iron Bull teach you your umm… limits, hunt around trying to find the perfect gift for Sera (much to the utter dismay of your compatriots), read terrible poetry to Cassandra, strong-arm a fop for Dorian’s pendant, save a spirit with Solas, challenge Josephine’s fiancée to a duel, save Leliana from spy assassins, and want to give Blackwall the coward another chance.  

The last major RPG I played that had multiple romance options was Fallout 4, and I romanced MacCready, Cait, Piper (just to shut her up – every time I’d talk to her, she’d want something more - ehhhhgghh), Danse and Curie (to also shut her up). Having one romance option in FO4 became too tedious, the only thing that changes is their scripted dialogue when they wake up next to you, so I romanced others to see what they said – because I honestly didn’t care about romance in that game because it was so flat.

Here’s who I romanced in ME:A (usually by flirting with everyone and then seeing what happens):

Liam – I started off flirting with Liam because he seemed interesting, until he quickly didn’t. His dialogue doesn’t change. You can’t really flirt with him in between missions after you’ve had a one night stand, and he’s so boring, I’d rather eject myself out of an escape pod than deal with him. If you go the whole game with Liam, he makes you a jump pack, but is it really worth it for being bored to death?

Vidal – I quite liked having someone off the ship to avoid a HR nightmare, but it turns out that after you become exclusive and dance with Reyes, that’s it – that’s your big romantic scene. Reyes becomes a chatterbox of nothing after that.

Jaal – Jaal is interesting, and unknown, and kind of reminds you of a perfect, dreamy boyfriend who is too in touch with their feelings, and you stay with them because you don’t want to deal with the fallout if you break up with them, because they’ll probably kill themself. Rocking a sexy, deep voice, I was almost convinced to be in a relationship with him, if not for Jaal’s confusing switch between Vulcan logic and hopeless romantic during the course of a conversation. Jaal is a warm space Mufasa, and will tell you what you want to hear, but his sex scene kinda sucked. Although the post coitus (?) debrief with Lexi is quite hilarious.

Vetra – I’m not sure if I didn’t flirt enough with Vetra, or if she didn’t want to be with me because I told Sid off – a lot, but perhaps it was never meant to be. My codex reads that Vetra hopes that we can be friends, so perhaps admonishing Sid worked against me.

Suvi – I didn’t flirt with her at the beginning, and I decided against a relationship with Suvi because her sex scene was awkward/awful.

Which leads to my commitment for the game:

Peebee is the one with the purple jacket… not young Sarah Paulson rocking the undercut…

Peebee – Peebee is a thorn in your arse from the moment she joins your crew. Rem-tech this, remnant structures that. Tight-lipped, evasive, and a motor-mouth, she’s a bit like Sera from DA:I, but a bit more grown up. She has limited long-range fighting skills, so bringing her to anything bigger than a small raider camp firefight is pointless. She insults Vetra, Liam, and Cora, but has some quite funny conversations with Jaal (interspecies breeding) and Drack (about their age). Liam and Cora, even during the final stages of the game, relentlessly question her loyalty. I chose Peebee because her storyline was the most interesting, as opposed to other potentials (Liam – “Hey, I’m a boring human too.” Jaal – “I’m an alien, meet my mothers, I moisturise my neck flaps.” Vidal – bad boy Han Solo). I turned down Peebee’s offer of casual sex, because at the time I didn’t want anything to do with her, so I told her that I’d want more to get her to leave me alone, and I didn’t want a Liam thing – where you have a one night stand once and then all of a sudden they want you to commit. But I kept flirting with her, regardless, recycling the “I like it when you flirt” dialogue whenever I got on the ship. I couldn’t do that with Liam, Jaal, or Reyes. Turns out, the more I learned about Peebee, through doing her loyalty missions, the more endeared I became towards her. From being tight-lipped and evasive to slowly trickling out interesting snippets – like her relationship with Kalinda, and her rem-tech project, she started to grow on me as I realised that she was not like the others, who give you all the information up front and you spend the rest of the game cycling through dialogue that you first heard 70 hours ago, with minor changes mirroring your progression in the story. You have to prove to her that you’re trustworthy. If you do commit to a relationship with her, and reciprocate her trust - it leads to a pretty explicit sex scene – complete with Asari melding. While the mechanics of the scene are quite awkward with FemRyder’s weird facial features – she looks like she’s super confused and not enjoying it all – trusting Peebee enough not to leave you brain dead during the first time she has melded with someone, and having Peebee trust you enough to meld with you makes the relationship all that more worthwhile. While I’m all for space boinking, Peebee’s relationship was less about the physicality of the act of boinking, and more about the trust and emotional connection inherent in the relationship, which I felt was satisfying. Post-meld Peebee has some killer dialogue aboard the Nomad, inviting Cora over for a pyjama sleepover, faking extreme horniness to get Jaal to admit that he was faking being asleep, and at the end, when you ask her ‘what am I going to do with you?’ she offers to make you a list. But the relationship and closeness doesn’t really go anywhere near the level of a relationship that DA:I does, due to the stunted dialogue choices. Although, I hope I didn’t get Peebee pregnant.

Post-Game Mysteries:

The ending scenes kind of set up the unfinished issues for the DLC/sequels – Primus wanting to kettify everyone, exploring Meridian, understanding the Jaardan, finding all the other lost arks, how many more useless solar systems are around, etc. Some questions remain, though. Say if I find a way to fix Ellen Ryder, what could she add to the story, other than my mother being there? She may be able to assist with new gadgets for players who chose a biotic route, or will she just serve as a ‘bringing your romantic attachment home to mum’ trope? Should we care about Jian Garson’s death and the mysterious benefactor? You learn during the game that the Milky Way has been fucked over by the Reapers, but we can’t save them, should we care?

After finding out why Alec Ryder made Sara the Pathfinder, all I wanted to do was talk to Cora about it – she wasn’t “looked over” and the promotion was to protect Alec’s secrets (i.e. Ellen on board, Milky Way gone to shit). I felt like my number two deserved an explanation, rather than sullenly assisting the other untrained Pathfinders on the Nexus (who did nothing, by the way – go out and bloody Pathfind – it’s not that hard!). I noticed that after ‘Journey to Meridian,’ Cora seemed cold, and would barely speak to me. Perhaps she was disappointed in me choosing Peebee, or perhaps SAM leaked what I found out to Cora. Will I ever get the chance to tell Cora about it?  

During the pre-prologue descision making process, you get to choose if you want a Male Shepard, or a FemShep (your ME:3 save has no bearing over this game). I went with a FemShep, like my ME:3 counterpart. Did I hear Jennifer Hale during the game? No. Does it even make a difference? Unknown.

After leaving Meridan and coming back to talk to everyone, some questions remain. During the epilogue, you meet the new crew responsible for Meridian. After you come back, the Australian implores you to go and find the sprog (a baby). Every time I see Addison, I ask about the baby that was born on a spaceship flying away from the Kett, who I suggested the family settle on Eos (no way was I going to get that lady on the Nexus – she’d have hated it!), but when I’m in Prodromos, I can’t find the baby. If that baby has been stolen by the Kett, I swear – I will hurt Bradley!

Further questions: Will Lexi and Drack ever get together? Will Vetra find love? Will Peebee take Jaal’s offer to try Asari-Angaran reproduction? Will the Nomad ever get some tunes? Will Drack live to see great-grandfatherhood? Will Cora hook up with Scott? If I agreed to sign up for Jill’s insemination program, and Peebee was carrying my child, could I raise them as siblings? How would my FemRyder deal with being a father?

What would happen if the Jaardan came back to Meridian to check on their experiments? What happens if the scourge takes over Meridian? Have I screwed over all of humanity by settling them there?    

[godslittlesadge]

I'm gonna wait until i play inquisition but what I would want it (or more like other future games cause I know that inquisition made some Choices) to have is:

More dialogue choices for the protagonist (like origins) while still having them build a personality according to the most predominant tone you've picked overtime (like da2)

The multiple act narration that da2 had: i felt that it allowed me to see how the protagonist's decisions influenced things as time passed and gave room for character development

More dwarves

More chances to talk to your companions because one talk per act plus the conversation you get if you were lucky enough to find one of the very few gifts there were in da2 or straight up used a guide was Not Enough

On that note more gifts because MY GOD i dont know if it was just that or if it was also combined to the fact that i tried to friendmance fenris as a very vocal pro-mage but i Struggled (and had to spend hours in the end looking for a way to get his friendship to max before the final straw, and all around got way too stressed out about the whole thing lol)

A sick aesthetic for your protagonist as the one hawke had (*chef kiss*)

The infinite option to kiss the companion you've romanced because If I Had To Struggle So Much To Romance Fenris Then At Least Let Me Kiss Him Every Time I See Him Once We Finally Become A Thing

In origins i literally smooched Alistair every single time i got to camp (which was a lot) SO LET ME KISS FENRIS BIOWARE YOU COWARDS

More shirtless sexy qunari please

just finished Dragon Age 2