#let me count all the things ive got going rn

[sirompp]

whenever i reach a certain amount of “pending” tasks my brain just kind of crashes. tragically acquiring new tasks is like my favourite thing to do ever and i keep forgetting what the old ones are but theyre still On My Hard Drive Taking Up Space.

[whorelaud]

꒦꒷ 𓈒 𓈒 𓈒 hushed fantasies ¡

pairing brother's best friend¡nicholas chavez x fem¡reader

summary thinking you were messaging your friend, you accidentally sent your brother's best friend a thirsty paragraph about him, with Nicholas opening it before you get a chance to delete it. what you were not expecting was the leading conversation, causing realization to wash over you as he hints your desire is not one-sided after all.

contains suggestive, sexual tension, a bit of dirty talking, a brief kiss, flustered reader, cocky nic, hes also very freaky (uhh???)

a/n this is the silliest thing ive ever written i was giggling the whole time while writing it. likes and reblogs are v much appreciated!!!

word count 1.7k

You: the amount of self control i have is insane because why do i not have this mans dick in my mouth rn please i need nic so fucking bad its not even funny anymore he is everything i want in life id let him use me any day morning afternoon n night im available ugh i dont even get the ick when its him he was acting like a dad earlier yelling at us to grill the meat right and it was so adorable ill call you daddy u want me to call u sir i dont kink shame im down for whatever king omg stop he got hurt earlier and he GROANED???? i almost fell to my knees YAHOOO he definitely whimpers #needthat 10/10 i just know its thick ooh tip pink shade #d97e77 thats insane till my knees are bruised and my throats scratched my panties fell tears are rolling down my thighs OMG PLS can you feel my pain hes so bodangshis how does my brother look at him and not wanna fuck him id be all over him if that was my friend gahhhd!!! hes actually so sweet he kept speaking to me earlier so i dont feel left out of the conversation and i find that adorable do u think he slaps it before he cums oh my his girlfriends so lucky im ab to put her in a headlock ahaha this is gross no man should have this much of an impact on u unless their dick is big and the sex is absolutely amazing yooo what he probably knows how to please a lady id be hard if i had a dick rn STOPP he has a happy trail im gonna lose it hahah lets find out where it leads i dont wanna think ab that im going crazy literally pulling my hair out that should be u baby GIVE ME A CHANCE?!!!! thinking ab him makes me so nervous this is getting a little too srs ahaha okay im sorry hows life?!? i miss u :(

Sending that message, you were anything but expecting the response you got in return, not from the man himself, that’s for sure.

nic: oh?

nic: i think you got the wrong person

You audibly gasp, realization washing over you as you read over the message. That was, in fact, not for Nicholas, nor was it for anyone but your friend to see.

You panic, putting your phone down to process what happened, needing a moment before responding. Right, you needed to do that.

But why did he see it so fast? He didn't even give you time to comprehend your message, the text switching to read in an instant.

Hell, it was midnight, and it’s been a long, tiring day for the both of you, having been out the whole afternoon, merely to come back to the hotel and spend more time with your other friends.

Everyone decided to end the night off early; early being a bit before midnight, with you heading to your room afterwards. Your brother and his best friend shared the room taking place next to yours, making it easy to reach out to him.

And for that, you were grateful since Nicholas was with him; meaning you got to see more of him throughout this trip.

You’ve had a crush on Nicholas for god knows how long, with it starting the moment your brother befriended him. You’ve technically gone through all the phases he experienced, hell, you saw him more than your own parents.

He was sweet, a little too sweet, perhaps it bothered you. Nicholas was very known among women, he knew how to attract a lady, showering her with praises until he eventually got what he wanted.

That made you extremely jealous, knowing you couldn't have him. He was forbidden, off-limits, someone you could only admire from afar.

And that stupid crush of yours led to this conversation, one you didn't want to discuss.

You: i didnt mean to send that to you

The text switched from delivered to read right away, causing your breath to catch in your throat.

nic: clearly

nic: i dont have a gf btw

Why did he feel the need to clarify that, and why were you relieved over hearing it?

You buried your face in your pillow, feeling heat reduce from your body. You’ve never been this embarrassed before, not around Nicholas. While you were weird sometimes, it was never this bad.

He wasn't supposed to know about this, nor discover it the way he did.

You: cover your eyes pls

You: this wasn't for u

nic: you sure?

nic: are there any other nics in your life?

Your stomach twisted at the message, hand coming up to cover your mouth as an audible gasp escaped your throat. How could he say that?

You felt all sorts of emotions wash over you, unable to process each one of them as you read the message over and over again.

You: what if there is

The question was risky, it could either end with him telling your brother, or him teasing you over it and brushing it off. Either way, you couldn't have him, so why not just fuck it and go with the flow?

nic: then that would be disappointing.

Your breath caught in your throat, vision going blurry as Nicholas’ bubble kept appearing and disappearing.

nic: id really hate that you feel this way about someone else

Oh my god, were you dreaming?

You could not believe your eyes. You turned off your phone, letting the dimness of the room seep through for a moment before you unlocked your device once again, heart skipping a beat when you realized it was real.

Nicholas, your brother’s best friend, might have been flirting with you, but that’s just in your head, right…?

You: ??? wdym

nic: you first

nic: was this about me, doll?

The pet name made you weak to your core, spiraling you over the edge as you put your phone down for a second. You took a deep breath, feeling your face heat up at how suggestive the boy sounded.

He sounded so desperate, you weren't sure if it was the tiredness, or him being genuine. Either way, you’re fucked, because you’re willing to do anything for him, even if it means breaking your heart.

You: what if it was

You: what will you do ab it

You felt nauseous as you waited for a response, groaning when the boy disappeared for a minute. Did you say something wrong? Why did he suddenly leave?

nic: then id risk it all

Speechless. Your mouth hung open, chest filling with lust as a breath heaved out of you.

You: are you saying this because you’re tired

nic: no

nic: god no

There was no ounce of self control in your body left. You almost screamed, overwhelmed by a new sense of emotions.

Is this how it felt? Because fucking hell.

You: it is

nic: it is what?

You: this is so embarrassing

You: why are you making me admit it you know exactly what im talking about

nic: baby

nic: jus tell me

You: no you suck im going to sleep

nic: WAIT no come here youre so cute

You blushed at the message, unable to suppress the smile forming on your lips. God, he’s such an idiot. And you were totally swooned for him.

You: i literally just sent you a message talking ab how much i wanna suck your dick what about that is cute

nic: oh? so you do admit it

You: …

You felt nervous, realizing how serious this has gotten. From a silly message turned into you contemplating whether this was a good idea. The last thing you were anticipating while typing that message was a confrontation, one from Nicholas; at that.

nic: you couldve told me yk

You: do you hear yourself

nic: ? what

You: nic you know this is wrong

You: youre gonna wake up tmr and forget all ab it

nic: you knkw

nic: yoirw so fucjinf hot

You came to a halt, noticing the amount of mistakes the boy was making. Your mind wandered somewhere else, feeling heat crawl past your neck, all the way to your face.

You: what are you saying

nic: fucking hell

nic: take the hint baby

You froze in your spot, tongue coming out to wet your lips, suddenly feeling heat travel to in between your legs. Don’t give in, don't give in, don’t give in.

You: what

nic: you couldve asked me if you were curious

nic: i wouldve happily showed you

That sent you over the edge. Your mind went fuzzy, unable to process the last few texts you received from Nicholas. He was being serious, dead serious, you were sure of that.

The texts you exchanged always revolved around your brother; usually Nicholas asking whether he was home or not. However, this one was different.

He was hinting something, something very risky that you were unable to resist.

You: dont say that

nic: what, you don't believe me?

You: nic

nic: give me five

You stared at the message on the screen, confused on what he meant. Your eyebrows furrowed with puzzlement, awaiting a message, merely to get nothing in return.

As you were about to shut your phone and go to sleep, it pinged, the notification startling you awake. You clicked on it immediately, mind going hazy as you read the message over and over again.

nic: open the door

nic: im outside your room

You didn’t hesitate as you got up, swiftly walking your way to the door. You unlocked it with haste, vision going blurry as you caught sight of Nicholas, who was standing inches away from you now.

He looked just as desperate as you were, maybe even more. And that was it, it was all you needed to pull him by the collar and cease the distance between you two.

The moment his lips collided with yours, you realized that maybe it’s worth ending up with a broken heart, because Nicholas tastes fucking addicting, and you found every way to make good use out of that obsession.

The possession of knowing he’s off limits, yet here he was, eagerly kissing you numb.

[sweetteainthesummerx]

THE LOVE LASTS SO LONG (7)

The pining saga continues...

series masterlist

Notes: hey ya'll! This is just getting started for real. I just realized that this is going to be so long :p so leave a comment (love those they raise me from the dead) and if you want any specific trope let me know!

★・・・・★・・・・ ★・・・・★

MESSAGES

ollie

hey text me when you land!

aubrey

safe and sound back in van ❤️

ollie

glad to hear it

sooo did u enjoy this weekend

aubrey

uh yeah! Never knew that the English clubs could get so wild 😭

ollie

cmon Im wild 😔

aubrey

ollie pls ur the sweetest guy ever u don't need to be wild 😭

olliebearman posted

olliebearman life's been wild lately

liked by aubreyyang, charlesleclerc and 880,426 others

view all comments

user1 UMM HELLO? THIS IS SO UNWARRANTED

aubreyyannggfan guys were gonna lose mother to a guy that drives vroom vroom cars for a living 🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️

liked by dior.n.goodjohn

-- aubreyyannggfan DIOR LIKING THIS WTF

aubreyyang don't let him fool you that's 100% water

-- olliebearman let me have my moment 🥲

-- aubreyyang hydrated king 🚰

-- olliebearman 😔

-- ollbreyhearts STOP UR HONOUR I LOVE THEM TOGETHER

user2 the lip bite GAWD

oscarpiastri r u working out or having a photoshoot 🤨

-- olliebearman guys pls I was feeling myself

-- smoothoperatorrr55 my mans catching strays left and right 😭

MESSAGES

aubrey

fine ur a wild guy

ollie

thanks 😁

aubrey

happy now?

ollie

yes very :)

aubrey

okay bearman

ollie

okay yang

whatcha doin

aubrey

at a cafe rn! about to meet w some people for a project

ollie

good luck!!

aubrey

ty xx

bearyfast_04 posted

bearyfast_04 wow

liked by kimi_possible, landoakabob and 12 others

view all comments

kimi_possible sir you got smth to tell us

-- bearyfast_04 can't too busy being speechless

arthuranddw ur so down bad it hurts my eyes and ears ive seen so many of her movies and interviews because of u

leosdad I KNEW IT - me and alex

-- bearyfast_04 what? how did you know??

-- kimi_possible it hurts me that hes being serious

chililos55 I think I missed a chapter

-- leosdad how u look rn: 🤓👆

landoakabob did u go through her insta just for this

-- bearyfast_04 ...no she sent me the last one 😁

aubberieyaang posted

aubberieyaang get urself a man that can do BOAF!!!

liked by walkdontrun, aryannawhatrudoinghere and 15 others

view all comments

celine_diorr whos urself? I thought u were standin on business 😤🗣️

-- aubberieyaang but business is 6'1, a sweetie, has big arms, explains his job to me and sends me selfies with a thumbs up :))

-- celine_diorr true I hate when guys do that four finger thing 🤮

-- chuck_bushes I feel targeted

walkdontrun does this mean we can get paddock passes

-- aubberieyaang girlll idk were just friends

-- leeahh_j liar liar pants on fire

liv_laugh_love white man did in one week what ive been trynna do for years #niceguysfinishlast

-- aubberieyaang BYE that's not true we've known each other for like 6-7 months

-- celine_diorr damn someones counting

-- dallastexas she used to watch his races on set 🤷🏻‍♂️

-- aubberieyaang NOOOO stop exposing me

★・・・・★・・・・ ★・・・・★

Taglist: @callsignwidow @iloveyou3000morgan @honethatty12 @taygrls

© sweetteainthesummerx.tumblr. all rights reserved. unauthorized copying, translation, or claiming of my writing or any works as your own is strictly prohibited.

[certifiedstarrr]

After Party | Pt. 2 | ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* | Chris Sturniolo

P1

warnings: swearing, alcohol, mentions of drugs, and smut.

if you don't like smut, find smth else to do.

she/her pronouns will be used!!

pink = y/n

green = lia

blue = matt

orange = chris

purple = nick

Word Count: 710

✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧

**NOT PROOFREAD**

b/n: sorry if this sucks ass, first fanfic ive ever written.

✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧

"Yes the fuck we are."

✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ✧･ﾟ:

The time reads 10:52pm. My hair is done, makeup is too, and my dress is on.

To Lia:

you otw??

read 10:53pm

From Lia:

yes im coming down ur block rn

read 10:53pm

✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ✧･ﾟ:

I see Lia's car, plan is in action. First, I take off my heels and I place them in my hand, I open my window, I breathe out. I'm ready. I've got this.

I've climbed down my tree and I'm walking over to Lia's car, on the way over I start putting back on my heels.

"Plan success!"

"Yesss thanks so much Lia"

"Anything for you girl"

✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ✧･✧･

We arrive at Noah's house a couple minutes late but people were still walking through much later anyway. The beer pong, bottles upon bottles of alcohol, and people sucking eachother's faces off; typical house party. But in the corner of the living room I see people that I never thought I'd see ever again. The. Fucking. Sturniolos.

I saw him and his brothers talking to somebody. Lia went to go talk to somebody who she thought was cute or some shit. And so I was now left alone.

Well I'd atleast want to be drunk so I won't remember any of the fucking feelings and emotions or regret shit. I grab a half-empty bottle of beer and down it, it plunges down my throat and it feels freshening.

We used to live in the same neighborhood when we were little. I was closer with Matt and Nick, but never with Chris; in fact we were always arguing, fighting; we hated eachother. I was extremely sad when they moved away, emotions mostly for Matt and Nick though. I cried for days on-end, not wanting to go to school without them.

When I caught eye contact with Nick it was like getting the top item on your Christmas list. The way his face lit up was like seeing him as a little kid again, and his smile deserved everything in the world. I went over to him hugging him tight and even letting a silent tear fall out of happiness.

"Oh my god y/n! How are you?"

"I'm doing fine, how about you?"

"I'm good, but it's been so long."

"You know, when you guys moved away I cried on-end. I never wanted to go to school without you guys."

"Me neither, I begged my mom and dad not to go anywhere."

As soon as Matt noticed that Nick was gone and looked over his face also lit up with joy, just like when he was little. I also hugged him tight.

"Y/n! How are you it's like I thought I'd never see you again"

"I'm doing great Matt, what about you?"

"You know I've doing great, after we moved away I gave my parents the silent treatment for days."

"Ha, guess we all didn't like your parents after that."

"Guessing not."

Chris walked over to us and shot me a look. Forget him and his attitude y/n. I thought to myself.

"Long time no-see Chris."

"Yeah whatever."

"Okay don't be a asshole Chris."

"It's literally been almost 10 years Chris and you still can't greet her correctly or nicely?"

"Guys it's fine. Just let him be."

✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:

We talked for a good while and I introduced Lia to them, they seemed to be fond of eachother.

At this point I was extremely drunk and I couldn't remember a single thing. But I last thing remember was drinking bottles of alcohol.

✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:

I woke up in a bed that wasn't mine. Was I in some random guy's bed? Or did I have sex with somebody I didn't know.

Well atleast I didn't remember anything. Right?

✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ:

a/n: just ask to be on the taglist!! and my reqs are always open!

@lovingmattysposts

[headcanon-territory]

☆ ~ Part 6 review and rambles - by a person who has part 6 as their first TV series watch -> reasons why because of that one edit in instragram that made it look cool

☆ CHAPTER 1 - Herlock Shomes arc aka Lupin III snooze fest ☆

>Ok to simply start, Part 6 has one of my favorite character designs in the series, I really love work of the Art Director of this Part and 2 of the specials they worked in

-But Part 6 Lupin is too attractive for me that I'm not normal when he comes up sometimes

-On a scale of attractiveness Teal Jacket is up there with Koike Lupin and CGI Lupin

~☆

>Art direction good, Animation was rough on them though

> especially the car scenes girl those are part of this series' core that it's kinda funny - they could have cheesed their way in making it cool by yknow by cutting the fps and do some squashing magic but I dont think budget and time can make up anything for it

>I should watch Part 5 for more Albert and Yata especially Albert because Yata, in comparison to what I said in the movie review post is actually... ok just not as exceptional as Prison of the Past Yata

>Ok to the biggest flaw this part have done - The Sherlock Holmes arc that took half the season

-ive been 2x speeding that whole thing because to simply put: It's almost all talk, the characters are cramped into one scene standing so awkwardly, NERFED ZENIGATA

-they should have some time to flex out the thing with Lily and Lupin because it feels so off that she immediatly knew that Lupin didn't kill her father with ease. Girl let the mystery be a mystery like how did she easily move on when that girl is trauamatized by his mere presence the first time she saw him

>And Sherlock and Lupin immediatly resolved their conflict with eachother when Sherlock disguised himself as Zenigata despite how they advertised part 6 as Lupin vs Sherlock

>SERIOUSLY ONE EPISODE WITH THEM INSIDE A LITTLE RESTAURANT WITH CRIMINALS?? THE TALKING TOOK HALF THE EPISODE IN ONE SETTING

>The Angel Fossil episode was written by Mamoru Oshii right?? Man nice to know he got a chance to show off a piece of his cancelled idea back then

-but instead of The little girl actually being an angel from the original pitch it's that blonde dude from the beginning actually being The Archangel, Michael.

-its an interesting plot but sadly was boring

-Do like that Heaven is canon to Lupin

>The time period episodes are the ones I only enjoyed along with the episode with a treasure hunter Grandma - Sad that they were kinda fillers and could have been used for more stuff with Sherlock

>GOT YURI BAITED FUCK

>God I don't think the production crew was enjoying the first half the moment theyre done with that and immediatly up with some Lupgang shenanigans felt like they can stretch their legs again

>I'm not a Sherlock Holmes fan but the closest thing that I watched related to this series is The Great Mouse Detective and I'm telling you TMS, you guys fumbled such a concept about Lupin III against Sherlock Holmes

>the story was almost all talk, they explained that shit to you with no proper buildup I was 2x speeding this shit in one day before school starts

>"Pops is not a badass" TMS count your days

~ CHAPTER 2: The Tomoe Arc ~ Mommy issues fuckfest ~

>Now Tomoe arc is the good shit and I'm so mad that the Lupin vs Sherlock thing was the thing that advertised Part 6 primarily

>infact all of my screenshots from Part 6 is from this half of the series

>Ok we have the Lupin fangirl episode, a Fanfiction episode, the episode with the fashion designer and Goemon -- THOSE ARE MY FAVORITES - AND THEY ARE ALL CONNECTED TO THE ARC THEY WERENT FILLERS??

>Me rn

>She got most of them from Pinterest boards

>I would have those photos as my pfp btw

>I like sweet man Lupin alot that's why I refuse to watch the more harsher lupin media because sweet lupin is such a comfort character

>I'm sorry Part 6, that whole monologue of Lupin in the trailer going "I'm a villain, I do bad stuff" goes nowhere in this series because Teal Jacket Lupin acts specifically like Cagliostro Lupin especially when he's with Mattea

>also Mattea kinda deconstructs the trope of the innocent girl character that we always have in the movies especially how Lupin treats her

-man she is fucked up but sad they didn't show her story more clearly

>Actually all the "Dangerous Women" that appeared each episode also deconstucts the whole thing with the NPC girls from the movies existing there for Lupin to solve their problems with how all of them are containing pieces of a puzzle that Lupin has to solve for his own problems - only for that problem to escalate

>The episodes that distances itself from the plot were fun that I didn't mind

>I'm gonna peg you Lupin

>I'm so horny for Teal Jacket Lupin save my soul

>Stupid snork minimi outfits

>Also the fact they even explained why the Lupgang are shown cooking dinner and have turns is because of Poker

-isnt that the most (unconvetional) marriage thing ever

>Even the 2nd half dosent Yuri Bait you this immediatly is superior than whatever the first half tried to offer

>Ok now the Tomoe arc has some unavoidable flaws, of course the ending and the reveal was lackluster and turns out that Tomoe was just chilling somewhere but hey what else can they do

>But the 2 episodes before the ending was wow..

>slowly and surely we are trying to figure out the nature of Tomoe through all the perspective of the girls and only in Episode 22, we finally got a peak of what Tomoe is capable of

>and how fucked up she is - Tomoe is doing all of that just to get Lupin back??

[TW:S/A AND SUICIDE MENTION]

-She has to fuck up lives of girls especially with Mattea and Mariel like girl?? You are manipulating a girl that she loves the guy that raped her???? And even got another girl in the scene to shoot the men Mariel interacted with and shoot herself after

>Wow how everything is set up and all comes together is great. sad that they all end up standing there in the last confrontation

>Also the surreal parts and fucked up lupin is what I came for holy shit look at that

>Tomoe's plan can't work dawg has his gang on the back of his mind

-Also the cage symbolism

-i really fuck with these scenes

>tomoe those cards aren't meant for you and Lupin that's meant to represent The Lupgang and their poker nights in order to see who's cooking dinner

>Fujiko's symbol item was a lipstick?? but what else can represent Fujiko

>Should have some Zenigata in there because of them being in eachother's subconcious

>Also fucked up Lupin shots goes so hard

>I should watch Mamo I need to dissect the lupins

>I absolutely love Tony Oliver's performance I was interested on how hes gonna work this past episodes out especially that this cast started with this series on crack

>The ending was saved by the conclusion being Polycule love wins

>and the lupgang being important to Lupin kinda shows too during the episodes with the ladies and how they are also connected to some of them

>seriously hold up

-You woke up from a hypnotist's trance because of your "companions"

- Your 'partner' shoves a cigarette into your mouth that was from his MOUTH

-said that they have dinner duties when one of them lose to poker

>Yea Fujiko you simply said that one episode regarding the lupgang, "I wouldn't call them exactly friends"

Yea because THEIR YOUR BOYFRINEDS!!!! YOUR STUPISF BOYFRIENDS!!!1!‼️‼️

>also the series after this was Lupin: Zero and weirdly never shows Lupin's mom but what they show is that Grandpa Lup and Dad Lup are also terrible parents so therefore: Lupin is the result of unproper care when he was a kid, genetics by horrible people and his only loving figure was a creepy woman that manipulated him

~~~~ END - What could've been & Zenigata ~~~~

How everything was set up in the tomoe arc and how that part of of the season was enjoyable enough I do wish They executed it better because alot of ideas had so much potential

Especially some scenes in the middle of the sherlock Holmes part

Like Zeni telling Yata to leave because the case is not safe for him since he knows the lengths Lupin can go and plus Sherlock Holmes but Yata refuses as he won't leave his teacher. Cool right?? And then got fucked over with the lack of Zenigata just for Sherlock to shine.

The overwhelming lack of Zenigata was the biggest flaw this part done even for the 2nd half. The writers don't wanna handle him that they put him in fucking jail for some Yata screentime. I love Yata but Yata content in exchange for Zenigata's??

And Zenigata was the guy that found out Tomoe's hiding spot for the audience to know but he came there last minute

And even they put the usual lupgang shenanigans in the last second

But in the end: Part 6 was saved in the second half but was still overshadowed by the very very undercooked first half that would have worked If the production team even tried

and The cast being so enjoyable kept me going but it really shows that without them I wouldn't have watched anything from the part at all..

~ ~ ~ ~

Sivhghgh,; you can even watch the 2nd half without the need of watching the 1st - It's fun and fun angst

[imsorrythatimweird101-blog]

hullo! ive listened to tape 2&3 a bunch rn and got a few questions abt mastering f10, i was wondering if u could explain how your process went or if what im saying is correct? i read thru the manual but its unclear in some places

so for practicing f10 in free flow, i do the energy conversion, then resonant tuning, then rebal.

here i have a question, do i do the whole fountain of energy circling and re-entering body every time or do i simply inhale, think of a circle with 10 inside it and then exhale it around me? im not sure if the fountain thing is just for initial practice or i have to incorporate it each time..

and then after that, i go into f10. there’s like 3 diff ways to get into it

1) there’s the way the intro tape did it. counting from 1-3 and relaxing face and neck, then letting the relaxation sink into brain and on counts 4-10 relax the other body parts

2) then there’s the way the advanced tape did it aka simply counting from 1-10 and relaxing body parts from head to toe with each exhale

3) finally monroe also talks about inhaling, saying 10 in your mind and exhaling to get into the state fast

am i right that they all do the job, but the first two are just preferable as a beginner and then with practice u can enter f10 with the third instant way? which way have u done when u shifted?

sorry if the questions are a bit specific, i just wanna do the exercises correctly and sometimes the tapes and manual say diff things😭 tyy <3

The reason why I'm super on about the trigger because it does the Rebal for you. So when you deep inhale and imagine a circle 10 then exhale. When you exhale, the REBEL is already creative for you so you don't have to imagine it. One thing that does happen is the F10 circle that you imagine goes around you in circle. How I imagine it (photo)

They all do the job yes. The reason why I'm beginning he makes you count and makes you relax because he teaching you how to do it first. Because later on the tapes, your supposed enter F10 in a instant. That's why 2 is called advanced and free flow is already master it, now you can do your method. (You will only have couple of minutes to get into F10 because each tape is like 30 minutes (you have to enter F10 to be able enter F12 and higher)

It's like running, you don't give a beginner to run 2 miles like a expert. You first start off slow like 1 half mile and teach the basics, then increase it by one whole mile and teach advanced techniques like how pros do it until 2 miles. So when they go run, they can run the 2 miles without no help and quick. So when they run 2 miles they can advanced to 4 or more.

[intertexts]

OK OK SINCE U ARE PRETTY FAR INTO PD NOW. I NEED TO ASK. DO U HAVE A FAVORITE CHARACTER. do u have a favorite moment. whos backstory are u the most interested in seeing. what are u excited to learn about the world . I AM PUTTING UR BRAIN UNDER A MICROSCOPE AND DISSECTING IT IVE GOTTA KNOW. what villains are u most afraid of. write me an essay on ur feelings about mark winters. etc etc etc etc WHATEVER U WANNA TALK ABT RN im standing in the middle of a field like a scarecrow and just SCREAMING at the sky

OHHHHHH MAN DUDE LITERALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO CHOOSE A FAVORITE OF ANYONE. FUCKK. GOD.

ok putting all of this under a cut because its so fucking long???

ok ok ok. lets see. they r all so so so good it's impossible 2 choose but also iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii really fucking like dakota dude..... i like him so much. so much. i will admit. i am a massive fucking fan of a character who stays silly. massive fucking fan of the emotional king dedede hammer that comes down when the silly guy drops the silliness. i love it when characters literally r incapable of processing their emotions. gebuinely i don't know what he put in that guy but it is cartoonish the way my neurons light up at him its not quite akechi from p5 levels of FUCKKK YEAH THIS GUY MY FUCKED UP LITTLE GUY!! but it is Getting Close!!!

whose backstory.... fuck. okay. Most interested in wiwi's backstory. of course. i AM really interested in vyncent's whole deal but i feel like his fucked up knife that possesses him (?????????) is slightly more of a specific thing than backstory. and i DO wanna know howww the jrpg protag isekai'd here but also like. consider... wiwi. also i wanna know if im right & ashe/ashes fucked up demon grimoire r responsible for his mom's death. ALSO I WANNA KNOW WHY MARK'S A LIZARD GUY.

FAVORITE MOMENTS SO FAR.... i LOVED the spirit world shit it was all so cinematic it was so lovely. usually im dogshit at like, visualizing descriptions in my head? but all of that was very much oh, yeah for sure, ive seen this cartoon! i know whats happening! that whole episode went hard as fuck. can't believe we got vyncent with a gun ashe going holy shit why am i fucking doing this imgonnadie william having a horrifying crisis over eating a fucking soul & dakota getting murked in one episode. & mal is just. on just. such a different level such a different world from Anything else they've experienced. its so good.

also i still really love the winding-down end of that amalgam island ep (5?) where they r exhausted & coming off so many huge emotions & stress & stuff & tide arrives.... that's really the scene that fucking hooked me i think. going ohhh yeah theyre just fucking kids and everyone at this table Knows theyre kids in a world where people will just fucking kill you. like,, yeah, it WOULD be fucked up if you were seventeen and ran into an island full of horrifying human and animal experimentation & abuse!! and theyre not playing it as a motw adventure where its just sillygoofy? ok. ok!! maybe these guys know where theyre taking it. like i can count on one hand maybe the amount of times ive been like "yeah im sure whatever the creators do will be good they've always done good & thoughtful work. i don't have to continually be delegating brain space to how im dissatisfied with this story." so i guess. i just like the show a lot!!

what am i most interested in about the world... ohhh man i love cape worldbuilding it's maybe like one of my favorite things. so i guess i'm interested in All of It?? in an overall probably-wont-be-answered-because-its-not-that-genre way i'd love 2 know what religion looks like in a world where JESUS IS A TRADEMARKED SUPERHERO & kids can come back from the dead. id love 2 know more ab the dynamic btwn politics & the cape world here thats always interesting? i really enjoy the approach they took 2 the kid heroes in the beginning, as in: these guys are literally still students they are not Supposed to be doing big hero shit. theyre not supposed to be doing teen titans or x-men shit & it is in fact a massive massive fuckup on their guardian's part when they Are in those positions. i'm a big fan of that i like it a lot more than the alternative. (unless yr like in a world like parahumans where there Is a narrative & in-universe reason why child & teen cape teams exist)

what villains am i most afraid of....... ok i kind of feel like being afraid of mal is like, being afraid of hurricanes or something. like sure i can be nervous about him but i can't fucking do anything if he's coming this way. so it's better i think to not think about it until it comes up & then pray. so i guess i AM really concerned about the overlord stuff. i dont know where it's gonna go but i know it'll be nowhere good & i know it'll end up getting people hurt. so.!!!!!!

[angel-fruitcake]

Hello just need to vent with someone else cause I feel like im stressing all the people around me irl feel free to not answer if you dont want to its ok really ill understand (im just writing this to you cause i saw you posting about it)

Im not american but ive spent the last months watching the campaign (mostly from misha but also in general on the internet) amd i was scared. Then biden stepped down and I felt relieved and hopefull that harris could actually win this cause "whos gonna vote HIM again? Right???" Then (or maybe before ive lost semse of time) the assassination attempt happend and I got scared again cause he had just gained if nothing at least the coolest picture he could ever wish for. But after that so many people, celebrities and not, started endorsing her and I thought there was still hope

I remember how anxious i got in 2020 and the exact moment of relief seeing Georgia going blue. And that was bad because of covid and all the stress of that slow counting but this felt worse

I spent yesterday rewatching destiel episodes to celebrate the anniversary but also to distract myself from the election but at night I just could sleep i was so scared. I talked about it with all my friends and family but they were not feeling it like me. Like tes they were scared a bit but not... not in the same way. Maybe its because its my first year out? Half out (family still doesnt know) like... i fear for the queer people (and in gemeral all the people who might be endangered) in the us cause now i feel more in the community maybe? Idk but I couldnt sleep at all

This morning I woke up and spent the morning on the destiel tag and on the AP map watchung it going redder and redder every hour and now... i dont even know what to feel

Im at loss of words thoughts and feelings. I DONT KNOW

Im scared like if I couldve done somethng for it or if it could directly affect me. It will sure but not today tomorrow or in january. It will be slow and scary and ill have to watch it happen without tje possibility of doing anything about it. Just like i have seen two wars start and my vote been wasted into nothing when my own country elected the far right just this june

Im hopeless and so fucking scared rn and my friends look at me amd dont get why I feel like a lone freak going crazy over somethung i shouldnt care about when I know I actually have to and they should care too and idk how to warn them i dont know what to do

And im not even american. I cant begin to imagine how it feels to know you have even done anythung you could and it changed nothing

So right now I wanna tell you all of you americans that you are not alone. That we are as scared as you are. Maybe it might be totally useless know this but... to me just seeing on line people going nuts makes me feel less crazy so yeah

sorry for the bad english my brain cant think straight rn (or ever lol)

omg anon i'm so sorry i didn't see this until just now !

it's perfectly ok for you to vent in my inbox. let all your fears and worries out, don't bottle them up. i'm glad you at least won't be directly affected in the immediate future, and i hope to god it stays that way.

i'm very scared as well, especially being a woman of reproductive age in america. i live in a red state too, so i already have less freedoms than my friends and family in blue states. i don't know what the future holds for america or the world, and that thought is terrifying. but all we can do right now is cling tight to our loved ones and take care of each other the best we can. i hope things will turn out okay for us all 🫂💕

ps. keep watching those destiel episodes if they bring you even a little bit of comfort. i know they definitely do for me when i feel like i'm being suffocated by the weight of everything around me

[thesimulacrasimp]

So yeah, here we go again! I just watched 3rd n 4th eps of hazbin hotel so, again, my thoghts abt it. Idk if i really need to put spoilers warning anymore, but ig ill do it just in case. As with previous post there will be some screenshots.

HAZBIN HOTEL EP 3-4 SPOILERS WARNING!

So tbh i dont have much to say about 3rd ep. Overall it was a really cute ep where everyone kinda got along. Also we met alot of new overlords (that one giant wolf girl was cool as hell) n got a few bop songs. I really like all new voices we got here. Also Velvette was killin in this ep, like slay queen!! Also i didnt know this girl (idk her name srry) was Carmillas (idk if spelled the name correctly--) daughter, that really suprised me.

Ok 4th ep... I have alot to say about it. First of all when that Angels moive started i was like: WTH S GOIN ON WHAT????? Then i thoght that its Angels dream (or nightmare-) n that wolf guy was representation of Valentino. N then when its all started i was like: Oh. I get it.

Speaking about Val, when all that fire started n he opened his wings, that was FUCKING BEAUTIFUL N I REALLY DIDNT EXPECT HIM TO HAVE ACTUAL WINGS, I WAS LIKE: :O I FOR REAL ALWAYS THOUGHT THAT WAS JUST A FUR COAT--- ok n thats literally the only good i can say about Val by now.

That one awful scene with Val n Angel was literally so scary... Ive never been in SA, ive never had such "experience" (and thank GOD for that), but i know that feeling of fear when you just in trap and you cant do anything, i know how that feels to be abused, when you just hiding in corner feeling so fucking scared that you gonna get beated up n yelled again, you KNOW that will happen and you just wait for it in terrify, you literally feel yourself like a little child who cant do anything, you want to share your problems to someone, just wanna cry to someone, but you cant and you need to pretend that everything is okay. I was so scared for Angel in that scene and i really felt it. And the way Angel tried to make Charlie leave before that all happened.. Yes, he definetly knew whats gonna happen n thats so scary...

Anyway OMG VOX HIIII!!!!!! :DDDD

BTW THE FACT THAT HES HOLDING VALS HAND LIKE HE WAS ABOUT TO KISS IT----- THIS SHIP IS TAKING OVER MY BRAIN PLS SEND HELP

Yeah, yknow what really strange thing about all that? Is the fact that Val s obviously a horrible person consindering all the things he done to Angel, but he is still an ENJOYABLE CHARACTER. Like- ofc that awful abusive scene was not enjoyable at all, but for some reason i just cant hate him!! I TRY BUT I JUST CANT N THATS SO WEIRD. probably its because i know its not a real person, its just a character but still-

Also (someone pls count how many times i used this word-) i really didnt expect to see an ACTUAL SEX SCENES IN THE SONG. Ig i shouldve expect it n i kinda did, but i still didnt-

Also this little scene made me fucking cry, for real. But not the fact that Angel crying made me cry, but his line: "If i end up broken, I wont be his favourite toy anymore. And maybe he'll let me go.."

I dont know why this exact line made me cry, but it did and i think this is awesome, because they really made me care for Angel, even tho, again, ive never experienced such feelings so i cant relate to that, but i still feel so bad for him.

Ok can we talk about that Husk was AN OVERLORD??? I WAS LIKE: WHAAAAATT????

And OF COURSE that one Husk n Angels song. You already know how i feel about it so im not even gonna talk bout it! SIKE‼️I WILL!!!!! THIS SONG IS SO FRICKIN CUTE, THE FACT THAT HUSK STARTED TO JOKINGLY (or maybe not jokingly-) SAYING THAT ANGEL IS A LOSER TO BRIGHT HIM UP IS ACTUALLY SO SMART! THEYRE BOTH SO CUTE TOGETHER SINGING AND HOLDING HANDS FOR A LITTLE TOO MUCH!!! AND THIS SONG IS MUSICALLY ALSO SO AMAZING, ITS LITERALLY MY STYLE OF SONGS, MAYBE MY NEW FAV SONG I CANT REALLY TELL RN! And the meaning of this song is really good too. Whatever is happening to you, unless youre not alone, everything is better!

Andddd everything is ended quite good and wholesome! They came to the hotel, Charlie apoligized and everything is good!!

soooo yeah! Thats it i guess! Im pretty sure im gonna edit it if i remember something else i wanted to say, but thats it by now!

My review/thoughts on eps 1-2

My review/thoughts on eps 5-6

My review/thoughts on eps 7-8

[hella1975]

🫣💌👉👈🥺

BOOMSTIE! i saw this last night and was like 'i fully cannot answer rn bc i have SO much to say and my sister will kill me for tapping away at my laptop so much at 1am' lmao. god. where do i start. you are one of my favourite people in this whole stinking world and you're one of if not my actual best friend (and im not someone who believes in having a best friend so that's a lot). you know things about me that no one else in the world knows. you have brought secrets out of me that i kept to torture myself and you held them gently and said im good in spite of it, kind in spite of it. i dont know what you see in me even now but you have so much love inside you and it seems to never run out, even when you think you have nothing left to give you're still kind. you asked me on the roadtrip 'would it be so terrible to be soft? to live softly?' and i said yes not because i believe it but because it scares me. me, who's the loud, stubborn one of our dynamic, the fighter to your calmness, and yet you are indisputably braver than me. you love people. you try try try even if and when it hurts. you dont let them scare you off. you retreat to lick your wounds and come back with love to spare. it's the trying that makes me adore you, because we both know it isnt perfect. sometimes you try and it doesnt work. sometimes you try and it comes out messy. sometimes you try and the very act of trying shuts you down and overwhelms you. but you pick yourself back up regardless. you are just so fucking determined to be out in this world and be out in it as wholly as you possibly can and that's not always possible but you want it anyway, will fight for it anyway. wounded and unsure you will fight for it and you inspire the fuck out of me because i get hurt one (1) time and immediately shut off and pull back, but not you. i know having your heart on your sleeve has got you hurt and you maybe even resent that side of yourself, but i dont. i resent the people that dont treat you nicely, but i'll never resent that part of you. you listen to me. you talk to me. you make me laugh. you put up with me when i isolate for weeks at a time. you're the first person in my life to treat me consistently and unconditionally gently, without anger or expectation, and ive snapped at you countless times because of it, rejected it, pushed you away, sometimes im even mean in response to your gentleness with the direct intention of getting you to give up on me, and despite every fucking thing you've stuck by me regardless. i cant count how many conversations we've had where you've painstakingly got me to open up and halfway through, hell sometimes even mid-sentence, it gets too much for me and i go 'this is stupid im not talking about this anymore' and i wait for you to get frustrated, impatient - all things you're entitled to. but you don't. every single time, you look at me softly and go 'okay, what are you having for lunch today?' and that's just how you are. you can't not do that for people. you can't not love your friends with every inch of you. you don't take half-measures. your biggest battle and most consistent struggle is your abundance of love and the way it hurts you back. i think that says a lot.

[oncominggstorm]

Im autistic & adhd. Also have undiagnosed physical health issues which been acting up lately. Really not doing well, need help. Currently in shutdown, include verbal shutdown. And struggling type, forgive grammar plz. Need help & support, but is none. Don’t know what do. Everything feel impossible. Long vent under cut.

Want run away, somewhere no one can find. Somewhere quiet & alone, with internet & tv so can watch comfort shows, play comfort games, etc. But will turn off phone, or get new number, or just block all family except younger sister on everything, or something, idk. Want comfy bed & comfy chairs & good temperature control & good food, and just quiet & solitude. Preferably somewhere out in nature. Let everyone figure out their own shit without me. Can’t do this anymore. ONLY things keeping me from doing are younger sister & lack of money. Mom & twin sister need figure shit out on own, can’t handle anymore. Can’t do.

Dont have a job or any money at all, literally only have $5 (and well over $20k in credit card debt, in collections). Am in autistic burnout & have been for nearly 3 years now. Had quit job in May cuz burnout so bad. But still expected take care of entire family.

Live with dad & twin sister (will call twin). Dad extremely NT & able bodied, dont understand me/twin at all. Knows nothing about autism/adhd & unwilling to learn. Pays bills & does chores so that is helpful, but not willing do any other support. Doesn’t believe in mental health.

Mom & younger sister (will call younger) live with grandma. Younger is 12 yrs younger, i basically raised. Feel almost more like parent than sister. Also is best friend & person i care most about in world, would die for her. Hate seeing her suffer. Twin & younger both also autistic & adhd, and neither have job. Grandma has moderate (bordering on advanced) dementia & need 24/7 supervision & support. Younger currently has busted knee, on crutches & really struggling & lot of pain. Mom refusing to believe is as bad as is, thinks younger is exaggerating, barely helping her. Ive been having drive over nearly daily to help. Mom had multiple strokes 2 years ago, still has both cognitive & physical challenges as result, & just lost job. Mom almost deffo undiagnosed autistic/adhd but refuses to believe. Doesnt believe younger is either (she still undiagnosed, me & twin formal diagnosed recently). Mom never great person, but got much worse after strokes, is mean & bordering on verbally abusive to us (and is DEFFO verbal abusive to grandma). Also has horrible memory & cognitive issues, doesnt understand things correctly, half of what she says doesn’t make sense, makes helping her hard.

Twin sick rn, lots of stomach issue & pain. Found out few months ago has enlarged spleen, but no answer yet, cant see specialist til Dec. Twin also has medical anxiety, so hard to know for sure what is real & what isnt. Every day twin ask me for MULTIPLE favors; get things for her, do things for her, etc. Also get MULTIPLE txts every day complaining about not feeling well, yet she refuse go doctors. Counted once a few days ago: in 11 hour period, asked for 7 favors & texted 13 times about pain.

Even when not sick tho, twin basically never help. Feels like she think I “less disabled” than her, not true. I doing horribly and still have take care everyone else while she sits on couch play video games & ask me to bring her things. No one ever bring ME things. Twin NEVER return favor no matter how bad I do/how well she do. One sided only.

Today twin ask for SO MANY THINGS, CONSTANTLY. Doesnt seem to care that I not doing well either & just CANNOT handle, keeps asking anyway. I tell her how bad am doing & immediately she ask for more favors. Won’t shut up about how sick she is (feeling very “wrong” w/stomach issues, has enlarged spleen but don’t know why yet & is worried that is cause), and says she is NOT OK, and that something is VERY wrong & she is worried she is dying, but also won’t get her ass to ER. Also expect /ME/ take her AND go in with, if decides go. Told her has to ask mom or dad first. Now just won’t go, and instead just keep complain to me about how bad doing & keep asking for help with stuff.

On top of that, am constant worried about all shit mom needs to do: get grandma house in her name so can keep (rn bank gets when grandma dies due to 2nd mortgage or something idk, which will make mom & younger homeless), get grandma car in her name (mom hasnt had own car in like 6+ yrs, just uses gma’s), figure out her unemployment (applied but no check yet cuz needs submit weekly proof of job applications & doesnt know how), get guardianship for grandma (mom never even got power of attorney, and is too late now cuz grandma cant understand to sign, so rn we just stuck cuz grandma not capable make decisions, but legally we cant make for her either), update her resume, get help for grandma, etc. Most of it fall to me. Mom kind of person who just WILL NOT do things, no matter how much help u give (ex: was trying get her accommodations for her job after strokes so wouldnt lose job. Explained process multiple times, both verbally & in writing. Figured out who she needed contact for help & wrote out email for her, ALL she had do was copy & paste & send email. Didnt do it. Now fired cuz couldnt keep up w/out accommodations). Mom also no longer even ask for help, just tells us we are doing. Ex: said to me “I’m going to come over tomorrow so you can help me do my job searches for unemployment.” Just tells me I’m doing it, not even ask. Sick of it. Grandma have dementia, at point where cannot even shower or wash hands, we have no support at all, doing everything ourselves. ADRC says only way to get grandma help is to put lien on her house & sell to pay off when she dies, but mom & younger live with grandma so that would make them homeless once she dies. Says we can’t even get occasional respite care unless give up house, let alone regular in home care.

Just can’t handle anymore. Feel like am being broke into thousand pieces, or crushed by thousand lb weights. Feel stuck. Feel like no choices, no good options, no way out. Want run away. Want take younger & her cat & find cabin in woods somewhere & just go run away from everything/everyone else. But can’t, no money. Feel so stuck. No help. No support. Don’t know what do.

[unlimitedhorsepower]

Tagged by: @thevoiceofthanatos​

Favorite color: warm bright yellow, mustard yellow & old gold, and just yellow in general. its a good colour. it makes me happy

Currently reading: idk, probably star trek fanfic my friend @rubbertplant​ was writing to give my opinion on it. i often read through my own stuff too lol, like whoah i wrote that??? ADHD has taken everything from me including my capability to read though, for real. ive been thinking of trying to listen to some audiobooks recently though, this cannot continue... its just that i also have no ears disease so idk how well that would go. determined to try though

Last song you listened to: havent been listening to music so much bc ive been playing videos instead but my last.fm has all my spotify listens so itll stay up to date on whatever i listened to last. currently seems to be “please play-bite” by pinocchioP. i often just let spotify play me whatever it recommends anyhow so theres variance. and i only started this account like a few months ago max so its not really a full picture of my music-listening

Last movie (in theaters): its not really a movie, but if it counts, the first ginga nagareboshi gin stageplay (recorded and released in finland in theaters with subs)

ginga was always huge in finland for some reason. idk. the anime is so violent though that i got really afraid of bears for some reason. theres so much blood... i never read the manga either i just knew of the anime and partook in my share of wolf roleplays (dogs were uncool! so i didnt do dog roleplays. iirc that really was my reason).

heres some funny wolves from my wolf rp days

2010. one of the first things i coloured digitally... i painstakingly cleaned the scanned pencil lineart with a mouse

2011. i had gotten my first drawing tablet as a birthday/xmas gift and practiced a ton around this time (more than just wolves lol)

Last series I watched: trigun stampede. even changed my phone bg into vash... but millions knives is probably my favourite. he just does everything wrong and makes his life worse. and everyone elses life too bc he sucks. but hes multifaceted so hes also my meow meow and whatever. i hope a ford explorer drives over him

if it counts though, ive seen some star trek TOS episodes and movies because my friends have been watching them. im not super into it but its always fun to hang. i also dont watch a lot of stuff. i dont even know what i do. guy who doesnt read or watch things but listens to jerma videos on youtube without actually looking at them while i “draw” and “write”

Craving: food honestly. i should cook something lmfao. i also want soda so bad but i dont have any. id make some tea but its disgustingly warm in my house so i only want cool drinks. could kill for a nice milkshake or a smoothie rn i think

Tea or coffee: tea... im the only finnish person who doesnt drink coffee for real. also got really into loose leaf tea bc i befriended a chinese lady who is really into tea and has a tea shop in the city near where i live

Currently working on: drawing this and trying to think how i want to do it. somehow want to incorporate flat colours and maybe shade his body naturally, and make the blood look realistic instead of flat colours... hmm not sure yet what i want to do

other than that im trying to proofread the chapter of my ryanyuri fanfic i already published because theres a lot of typos and strange sentences in there but its been a chore bc my body breaks down when it gets too warm smfh... not looking forward to when my apt goes over 30 degrees celsius it is unlivable. im also trying to complete a “lookbook” of my tnb sims. but i always start huge projects that take three million years to complete and im really slow lmfao

Tag people you’d like to get to know better: i could just ask these questions from everyone i talk on discord with. fuck my friends i know irl or otherwise, only asking people who r my friends through tumblr. no need to do this though. also this isnt probably meant to be answered so long-windedly... thats just me. i cant answer with one word i gotta write an essay. heres three tags though @basslinegrave​ @vita-divata​

(record scratch before 3rd tag) and @rubbertplant​ bc they were streaming a game in discord when i started typing this and i was like hey wanna do it and they were like yeah

i expect replies on my desk by 5pm TOMORROW!!!!get to work!!!! no i jest, do it or dont, i dont mind either way, just if you feel like doing this. if you see this and want to do it feel free to consider yourself tagged. godspeed

[the-snowdrop-system]

Fuck it, ALL my answers below the cut :3

1) Better than most, but not the greatest tbh...

2) My cousin (STRICTLY PLATONIC she has been helping me thru transition ever since i came out to her)

3) yes, i regret going to southern michigan in january

4) very insecure

5) single

6) i dont care how i die honestly, i just hope its relatively painless.

7) homemade pizza my aunt sent home with my dad today

8) if competing in martial arts as a kid counts, than yes, if not, then no.

9) constantly... i should stop that...

10) 1st day of 4th grade (he was bullying me for years, so i punched him square in the nose. He never bullied me again)

11) no, BUT im a hopeless romantic, so by the time you are reading this, my answer might have changed.

12) constantly... my sleep schedule sucks :)

13) only 2 people. My most recent ex, and the male responsable for half of my existance >:(

14) 5 people. My 3 besties from college, dude i talk to on occasion, and my cousin (see number 2, she lives over 1000 miles away from me)

15) no, i neither physically nor financially could take care of a pet, i wish i did tho, would make life slightly more bearable

16) rn, im upset. I might go over that more in another post, if i do ill link it here.

17) no

18) YES i realize they serve a good perpous to our ecosystem, i just wish they would do it somewhere else 😭

19) yes, to stop myself from going to southern michigan in january. Nothing good has come from that decision.

20) i dont remember where it was... it was a while ago anyways.

21) the same as they have been since i had surgery. Get up and walk around every little bit. Other than that, nothing. Maybe watch some lets plays of the new FNAF game since i cant afford a copy of my own :(

22) no, i wouldnt make a good parent honestly, im not responsible enough...

23) i got my ears pierced in december, but they healed up waaay sooner than they where supposed to so now i have 0. what a waste of money >:(

24) math and technology. Dont get me wrong, i am bad at both, but they are still what im best at 😭

25) wait, you already asked this question :(

26) food wise: nothing. In general: a hug.

27) probably yes, but they did worse to me.

28) yep, my most recent ex. (They are also the one mentioned in 27)

29) she did something to me, i stormed off, and she cried because i was upset, does that count?

30) i have a list :) see number 16.

31) no

32) pink or blue 🏳️‍⚧️

33) sometimes? It really depends honestly. Some people i trust to much, and other people i dont trust enough smh...

34) i drempt something about stawberrys last night i dont remember any specifics...

35) one of my parents. I dont remember which one tho.

36) i give everyone a second chance, but if you fuck up again im done. (If i can give the 2 people i hate a second chance, than i can give other people second chances as well.)

37) forget, only cus i got memory issues. But in all seriousness, i have a hard time with both...

38) FUCK NO this shit the worst!

39) 16 i think...?

40) NO????

Where the hell are questions 41-50? I feel like im getting ripped off! /j

51) Quesadillas

52) no, cus what "reason" is there for cancer? What "reason" is there for biggotry? What "reason" is there for plagues and pandemics? If someone can answer those, then i might reconsider.

53) turn on a quiet youtube video to listen too to help me sleep and turn on a fan to keep me cool.

54) cheating, no. Open relationships are one thing, but when two people are together in a closed relationship and one of them cheats, thats just wrong.

55) i try to be nice, but some people make that reeeeally hard. I can be a massive bitch if i need to be.

56) 1. My bully in elementary school.

57) yes, but i also believe it is very hard to find.

58) light snow

59) ... yes.

60) eventually, but only if im allowed to wear a cute wedding dress. (Ive had multiple exes say "if we get married you still have to wear a suit" [for reference im a trans woman])

61) depends on the context, but yea, it can be.

62) get back to me on that one. Im not sure anymore. The things that used to make me happy now only just get me by. I dont know how to feel happy rn.

63) fuck yea, i hate my dead name and want to legally change it, but there is that whole "im broke af" issue i gotta fix 1st.

64) yea, cus i would rather punch them than kiss them tbh.

65) i am gonna change the word from sex to gender in this question just because it will be easier to answer. I have 1 male friend, and idk what i would do if he said he likes me tbh...

66) yee. Same dude as 65

67) last man i talked to was my dad, other than him, the friend i mentioned in the last 2 answers.

68) prolly same dude as before, we where discussing FNAF lore

69) 2 people destined for eachother from birth? No. 2 people who form a bond stronger than just love, yes.

70) each of the 5 people i miss (see question 14)

70 horrible questions ... Fuck it

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents? 02: Who did you last say “I love you” to? 03: Do you regret anything? 04: Are you insecure? 05: What is your relationship status? 06: How do you want to die? 07: What did you last eat? 08: Played any sports? 09: Do you bite your nails? 10: When was your last physical fight? 11: Do you like someone? 12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours? 13: Do you hate anyone at the moment? 14: Do you miss someone? 15: Have any pets? 16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment? 17: Ever made out in the bathroom? 18: Are you scared of spiders? 19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? 20: Where was the last place you snogged someone? 21: What are your plans for this weekend? 22: Do you want to have kids? How many? 23: Do you have piercings? How many? 24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)? 25: Do you miss anyone from your past? 26: What are you craving right now? 27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? 28: Have you ever been cheated on? 29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? 30: What’s irritating you right now? 31: Does somebody love you? 32: What is your favourite color? 33: Do you have trust issues? 34: Who/what was your last dream about? 35: Who was the last person you cried in front of? 36: Do you give out second chances too easily? 37: Is it easier to forgive or forget? 38: Is this year the best year of your life? 39: How old were you when you had your first kiss? 40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked? 51: Favourite food? 52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason? 53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? 54: Is cheating ever okay? 55: Are you mean? 56: How many people have you fist fought? 57: Do you believe in true love? 58: Favourite weather? 59: Do you like the snow? 60: Do you wanna get married? 61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? 62: What makes you happy? 63: Would you change your name? 64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? 65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? 66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? 67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? 68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? 69: Do you believe in soulmates? 70: Is there anyone you would die for?

[cat-collections-agency]

yeah tbh i was just playing along w you , echo playing < thing i just made up rn with cool guy swag anyways yeah just echoing off you for funsies :3c ANYGAYS YES POKEMON !! tysm for rambling now ... time to ramble back >:3c DUDE i wanna get sword or shield so bad but im broke rn so rip baja blast anon , cant even gett some games T_T my first pokemon game was lets go pikachu (i believe) fun fact : i didnt know pokemon games existed until like ... early teens i only thought pokemon existed in the anime (and manga but i was too young to get the manga sadly) but now i have pokemon violet :3c my starter is quaxly i love my drag queen duck <33 i also wanna get arceus really badly because IT HAS ONE OF MY FAVORITE POKEMONS TURTWIG AND I NEED TURTWIG ive got a plush of that guy once i get money pokegaming time for me >:3c i was into pokemon ever since ... counts years when i learned to read at a wee lard age < young child because i had dvds and it would run on the channels id watch it on :3 i loooove the pokemon heroes movie and pokemon i chose you, xyz, and bdsp anime but my all time favorite is alola U_U idc how (apparently) controversial it is PEAK SERIES TBH !!! /silly i actually never played the card games but i was OBSESSED with collecting them (still lowkey am but capitalism my beloathed /silly) tbh when you said sonia first thing i thought of was the sonic oc(?) and i had a whiplash /silly /j i will check mandtv though !! /gen seems interesting i havent been in much poketube just alphared and jaiden animations :3c - baja blast anon

HELP 😭 no Sonia from swsh is my biggest enemy and I wish I had that dlc to kick her ass cus she's so ANNOYING. The amount if times I've tried to avoid her;w;

Anyway. I hope ur able to get ur slimey claws Arceus and swsh, though swsh is super short without the dlc unfortunately:C) we don't have the dlc.)

I never fully got to watch the amime nor watch the movies because older brother HOGGED the TV. 🙄 though from the bits I did see, i had unimaginable beef with Serena. I always wanted to get into the anime and fight her./silly

We also collected the cards but were forced to stop st like 6th grade cus no one would buy them for us:C. We only really liked collecting them anyway.

Also Sonia isn't a sonic oc, she's a character csnon to the Sonic Underground show. It's unfortunate that her snd Manic aren't in any other shows >:C like. I'm sorry. I LIKE SINGING TRIO HEDGEHOGS GRRRRRRRRRRR

[forestryfae]

holy fucking shit is it possible to get more self centered. holy shit.

stepmom called at like 22:30 the first time. didnt answer. clear sign to not fucking call again id say given most normal people are asleep by now. called again like ten minutes later and i thought well maybe its an emergency. surely shes not stupid enough to call twice in the evening around most peoples bedtime. <--- said by someone who was once called by her 7 times in half an hour and all they wanted was either a chat or they bought me a lamp at ikea idfr

nope. shes chatting away and shit asking where i am, whether i want to celebrate christmas with them, fully expecting me to let them help me when i move into an apartment.

first of all lmao wtf. im not asking them for fucking help moving my shit, if i did theyd go to sweden that exact day and be like "oh were in sweden right now but we can come by later :)" like they did when we asked them to maybe come help w the house. dad was tasked with contacting a lawyer for me once too, he promised hed do it he knew how horrible i had it and when we got to the meeting w my support team he told me he hadnt done it. 2 months i waited and he just hadnt bothered. btw i got really sick a few days later. fever, exhaustion, the whole thing.

and then shes like "it must be so nice to have your legal guardian and finally have someone who gets stuff done" yeah well dad was useless and mom was actively hindering me from talking to a lawyer and you and dad knew how bad it was but you didnt do shit to help so. thanks for that ig.

btw letting me stay for a week during christmas does not count. i really want to say im grateful but rn i dont feel grateful. im pissed. they knew how bad it was and did fucking nothing. i talked about how bad it was and they did nothing but try to talk down how bad it was, atleast dad. sure, stepmom defended me sometimes but having my dad say the shit he did and acting like it was no big deal living alone in a rotten cold house w two cats while i was severely depressed and utterly isolated and only helping if he felt like it. holy fucking shit. yeah dude atleast its getting taken care of i fuvking guess. being a parent doesnt stop when your kid turns 18 and if you marry a dude w kids you cant just. not talk to the kids if it doesnt suit you

and shes asking for all this info about where i am and so on and i just gotta lie. i dont wanna have to argue with a grown ass woman at nearly 11 pm and tell her i straight up dont want them to know cus theyve been utterly useless at all times except like. two times. dad fixed some electrics and i got to stay for christmas and thats it. ive been driven home after shopping sure but whose fucking fault is it i dont have a license? could unsupportive parents who offer to help but dont ever let me drive be part of the problem? could the lack of legal help and effort be a part of the problem?

and obvs im answering in single words and the occasional sentences cus im fucking annoyed and trying not to be rude but shes chatting away about shit she has no business knowing or getting involved in at almost 11 pm. so the call ends w her asking if im sad cus i "sound so sad" like no im not sad. tell her im not sad. she said something afterwards i dont remember but i did wind up saying that "well its kind of really late to call someone at 10:30 in the evening" and she starts. going on about how she just really missed me and missed talking to me and at this point internally im just fuming. she called that late at night just to chat? is she fucking stupid?

like its not bad enough the only times i ever get called is when theyre bored in the car and need entertainment so i have to sit there listening to my own voice echo out of their handsfree while the mic is garbling their voices so bad i can barely tell wtf theyre saying over the sound of traffic. and now shes calling in the middle of the night tol cus her emotional need is too important to let people sleep

[show-us-kaidenshenandoah]

ill eventually make a proper, pretty intro-post

but hello, hi, i am Kaiden-Shenandoah Knapp

also, yes, Kaiden-Shenandoah is my first name. the hyphen is optional, but you still have to type/say the whole thing. no, you may not call me "Kaiden". yes, i am aware it is a mouthful lol

(probably gonna change my surname is "Knapped" in a few years. i wanna distance myself from some shitty family while making the Indigeneity in my surname more apparent. dont be surprised when that happens. im just putting it off bc i got a lot on my plate rn lol)

(also if you knew me as "Kayleen", hi, hello, i no longer go by that childhood nickname. it is retired, wave goodbye, better to have loved and lost and all that)

this is my messily mindless "welcome to my head" blog, we do things very casually here. im making it my new Main (as of 24 March 2024). my professional/art blog is @kaidenshenandoahknapp

but the real point of this post is: i am not a bot lol

and also, stuff is on a queue (until i do a mass-reblog binge but, typically, i am on queue)

everything in my queue is now 2 post per 24 hours (as of: 20 April 2024)

ive been on tumblr before, but since this is a new Main, im just going through my favorite content-creation blogs i know and mass-queueing loads of the op's projects. (if you are one of those said blogs and find this nth new notes a day from me annoying, please let me know; and i will just spam them all to Post Now so i can get out of your hair asap) i'm also just not good at regularly keeping up with creators' new stuff week-by-week, so instead i generally mass-queue because i assume mass-reblogging is a bit more overwhelming, idk, maybe im just overthinking lol

tags guide: (mostly for me, ngl lol i need reminders of what i tag what when i do my mass-queues)

#me - me posting something

#relatable - "omg that is so me" at someone else's post

#aesthetic - me just really liking the vibes, which sometimes just also happens to be pretty to look at lmao

#canines wolves and werewolves i love - i know what i am about. ill probably have more "niche My Special Interest tags" as i find posts that fit them

#nutty nutcrackers / #the nutcracker - another Special Interest tag. pretty self-explanatory, i like The Nutcracker a lot lmao

#betty boop - you would think this belongs with fandom tags, but no. part of why i am obsessed with her (and have been since i was, like, 14) is because she was the popularization of the very next tag's trend

#infantalization in animation - it's when you apply baby facial proportions to an adult bodied character, it's most often done in female characters. i'll be using this tag outside of animated stuff btw. but yeah, anything that examines that visual design choice i am all 👀 over lmao

#other people's art - any individual person, not counting final version of studio work (like ill tag "Lilo and Stitch"'s exploratory concept art with this, sure, but i wont tag stills of the "Lilo and Stitch" film)

↳ #animal art

↳ #background art

↳ #oc art - is all "my original character in a canon piece" kind of ocs, not the "my original character in my original story" type

↳ there are also specifically listed artists here and there if they have influenced me/my style in the past or recently (such as but not limited to: #rvsa). almost all of them are indies with social media (aka: no Van Gogh, no Hayao Miyazaki. if they have their own fandom, i tag said fandom and not the specific artist, usually. it depends. there are some gray areas)

#brushes - the (digital) brushes people i like use

#art tips

#writing tips - is about actually doing the practice

#on writing - is the philsophy about the practice

#[insert fandom here]

#[insert fandom here] analysis

(here are the tags i chose for some fandoms that had multiple possible tags. this is not all of my fandom tags)

● #studio ghibli, #[insert studio ghibli title here] (i tag both the movie itself and studio. because sometimes i want something from the original movie, so i go into those tags; and i also go to the studio to look at overarching things since the studio has such a strong overall aesthetic/visual brand)

● #[insert disney title] (here, i do tag the specific movies and i dont just use the studio. because im usually looking for specific things this one disney movie has)

● #moomin (as opposed to "moominvalley", "tales of moominvalley", or the like)

● #my hero academia (so many different options for one work)

● #trigun (so many different branching creations from one source lmao im just gonna lump them together)

● #into the spiderverse (i dont use "across the spiderverse" for simplicity's sake, and i don't use the hyphen/space between "spider(-)verse" also for simplicity. its easier for me to be consistent if i just go "nah, its all one word")

● #marvel comics (i do not tag the mcu specifically)

● #dc comics, #batman (i tag both. but i dont tag any other dc comics property. i just know im esp obsessed with the batfam enough that, sure, they should get their own tag)