#let him be happy!!!! season 3/4 break my heart honestly cos......

[nightglider124]

Titans: Season 4 - Ep 12: Finale, Dickkory + Whole Show - Thoughts

Oof, this is gonna be a long ass post. I'm gonna put into words my thoughts on the finale, my thoughts on dickkory in the finale as well as dickkory in general in the show and lastly a few thoughts on Titans as a whole since it began 4 years ago.

No word of a lie, I just sat and rewatched the finale with a notebook, noting every. single. thought. So... buckle up and good luck if you're gonna try reading to the end. XD

Episode 12: Titans Forever (Series Finale)

So, first, I'm just gonna talk about the finale without gushing over Dickkory. I will, obviously but I'm gonna separate them out.

I love that it got straight back into the action with little to no filler. Filler stuff fucks me off when you're so close to the end like in a finale, there should be no filler and for that, Titans got points from me.

I really liked that Rachel did her lil soul self projection - that was cool and not something we've seen her do before in the show (I don't think) so I found that a cool thing to throw in rather than having Kory just blow the door up which let's face it, still would have been boss af.

Lmao, Sebastian continues to be just such a little whiny bitch. XD I've said it every week but he's just so annoying. Don't get me wrong, I think Joseph Morgan did it well and he is a good actor but God, Sebastian is just so unlikeable for me. He fucking sucks and if I was in STAR labs, I would have thrown a punch like FUCK. The only time I was nervous of him was when he had my girl Kory for a hot minute. I did not enjoy that.

LOL. Trigon got like 2 mins of screen time and was then just gone. It was hilarious to me, I gotta be honest. Like Trigon was built up and then just got hacked by his son lmaooo. It had me laughing, ngl. Drinking the blood from his heart was weird af but was in keeping with the rest of the Blood cult and what the show has shown them to be like including Sebastian but still. Grim.

I really loved the title intro; how the images on the TITANS was the core four and then flashed as usual to the four of them from season 1. Idk if that was intentional but it felt like it and I appreciated it a lot.

GAR'S CRYING FACE THROUGHOUT THIS FUCKING EPISODE. MY POOR BABY, GOD DAMN IT. Conner's 'death', Kory's 'death'... like fuck give him a break.

GLAD TO FINALLY SEE GOOD BOI KRYPTO. I was wondering where the heck he had been, honestly. Good to see him there at the end. XD

Lmao, so I get it was to show like Dick was hopeful Conner would be okay but him whipping out his phone to make a dinner reservation had me cackling like bro, pick a better moment pls. Out of context, that would be so fucking funny. XD

I adored Tim's little rejoin with the team. He is such a Robin nerd, I love him. Everyone smirking like the cutie he is was sweet af.

Also really loved Kory and Rachel's power merge. It did fuck all cos he wasn't actually there but it made me happy. My girls. <3

Sebastian riding up to STAR Labs on his little blue bike - bitch, someone should have sniped your fucking ass off of it then & there.

I felt bad for Dr Espenson; I liked her. What a grim way to go too. Screaming, bleeding - ick.

Bernard literally getting up to see everyone getting murdered and was like well shit, fuck, I gotta move. XD

Lmao, Dick literally keeping a secret about a womhole; I was just... this is so on brand for him ffs. XD

Sebastian just being like, 'Fuck your password' and Calliope accepting it made me giggle. Idk why.

I really liked the explanation from Calliope about how powerful Kory really can be - Her strength is always downplayed in every media format, I swear. It fucks me off so badly. The woman can literally go toe to toe with Superman ffs like acknowledge her power, DC, you little bitch. God.

Kory getting controlled was a no no for me. When her eyes went red and she went a' wandering, I was like NOOO KORY! STOPPP! SNAP OUTTA IT!

I really liked the scene with Kory and Sebastian like my heart was racing and in my mouth cos it was like don't fucking touch her, you psycho but the tension was really good in that scene, I thought.

I won't lie, some scenes were weirdly paced however, I think it would work fine if you were binge watching the whole season. I like that it's straight in but it felt a tad all over the place in some parts but again, I don't think it would be an issue if you're just watching all the episodes together.

"You're no God." - Fucking GET HIM, Kory. Get wrecked, Sebastian, you glorified mama's boy.

The team takedown of the metahuman assault squad was rad; I loved the teamwork and the moves and it felt good to watch. I very much enjoyed it.

"I won't help you destroy my home - Either one of them" - Oh, Kory <3 You literally are such a sweetheart and I loved that it wasn't left to be ambiguous like gasp, which did she mean?

I DID NOT AND DO NOT APPRECIATE KORY IN PAIN. FUCK OFF.

Gar & Tim's friendship gives me life. They're just such bros; the shoulder taps and smirks like they are SUCH boys. I love them.

I SNORTED at the way Dick just pops outta nowhere and sucker punches Sebastian. It was so funny. XD

"For the record, that game you made fucking sucks." LOL TIM, my fucking soul mate. I was DYING. XD

Gar almost getting dragged into the wormhole had me on EDGE. Like, not my sweet, cinnamon boy, no thank you.

Rachel waking Kory; I was SOBBING. The flashes of Kory memories. My actual heart hurt.

Nightwing literally fighting until he is deadass on the floor was giving me life. We love to see a determined fool.

Superboy showing up last minute was pretty dope like a secret weapon, I liked it and was wondering like is Conner gonna appear orrr...? XD

LOL Conner with Tim & Gar was cute and great. "Wait, was I dead?" and Tim brushing it off like, "I'll explain later" had me creasing.

My God, Kory's sudden power up and her just soaring straight through the fucking roof had be cheering loudly like it was the best and is a favourite scene by loads. It was so frickin' cool and something I like to see Kory do in shows and movies and shit cos she is just so slept on by DC. She is fucking amazing and yet... we never get to see her like that or very rarely. I loved it.

The kids' sad faces when Kory is like 'No' to throwing Sebastian through the wormhole. I die. Rachel especially - Her face was so sad and if you look closely, you can see Rachel is like sobbing but trying to restrain her emotions after Kory lets go of her hand. She knew. She knew what mama Kory was gonna do.

Honestly, this scene with Kory still making the sacrifice was hard on my emotions and was the one that had me closest to tears - I was full on at the edge of crying ugly ass tears.

Kory's supernova was perfect to me. Like, yes, look at that damn powerhouse goddess.

Ryan's crying face had me wanting to cry this whole episode, omg.

Firstly... the Christmas scene is so weirdly placed, I thought and I have to say it. I don't get, and I've seen others question this too, if it's meant to be a flashback or a future vision. I assume it's the end of S3 cos Kory's hair, Tim isn't yet there, Rachel's hair is purple still... but Dickkory?? EXCUSE ME that is a bit cozy for just friends? Dick's hand on her waist and they are literally standing so close together wtf?? It was so freakin' cute regardless but yeah, it felt randomly placed. I agree, it should have been maybe used as a flash forward instead? Idk.

I keep mentioning it but GAR CRYING HAD MY HEART BREAKING EVERY TIME.

The float back down from space and the focus on her - Just really made me smile cos like it reminds me why Kory is and will forever be my favourite DC character and just fictional character in general. Thanks to Anna like Titans Kory has joined the roster for my top versions of Kory, idgaf what anyone thinks. I love her.

THE GROUP HUG. I AM A MESS.

The dinner scene was so bittersweet like it makes sense for the young ones to go - it was foreshadowed multiple times for each of them really but I was so sad. I not like team splits. I recently watched a new hero movie... hint hint where this is the same ending and I sobbed in the cinema. I hate these endings but I also get it. Like I said, bittersweet.

Gar embracing The Red & doing something for him felt right and a 'Good for him' moment.

Rachel going to college!! I like the Bludhaven Easter egg - it made me smile.

Tim is such a cutie and I really love Jay's portrayal of him.

---

Conner, we all knew that was coming too. All the babies flying the nest, I am SOBBING.

Love Krypto sat at the fucking table of this fancy ass restaurant lmaooo.

I really loved the finale, I will be honest. I really didn't have issues with it other than the small few I've listed. Like, I wish we had more time with the characters but the episode ending left me on a high but that could be cos it ended on my babies... It felt like an upbeat way to end the series and I thoroughly enjoyed it.

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Episode 12: Titans Forever (Series Finale) - Dickkory & DK Thoughts

So, I'm gonna basically do the same as above. Ima go through the episode and just gush about the DK scenes lmao.

I really did feel like there was Dickkory moments in every scene. There were individual scenes but I felt it was always there in the background. All of Dick's choices and his motivations etc, I felt like he always had Kory in his mind, personally.

The freakin' RV scene with them had me feeling all kinds of ways. It had me giggling and tearing up. The banter about them first meeting and her stealing his car!! I am so happy that that got brought up since we never really had them talk about those things after S1. For a while, it felt like it just got retconned. Glad to see it was not and they reflected on it.

Dick's fucking sad eyes and his broken way of being like, "Please, don't." I die. Brenton expressions especially when Dick is with Kory have always been so top tier, I stg.

LOL, when they learn about Project Icarus, Dick's eyes keep shifting back and forth to Kory as if being like "Fuck, wifey so gon' be big mad."

UGH. The "Kory, wait!" when she leaves the RV and is getting into the porche. The way he calls and runs out after her felt very reminiscent of S1 in Angela's house after she attacks Rachel. Like, mmm, yes. It felt similar and I adored it.

Dick & Kory's continued banter in the porche. Their serious af conversation about what they're going to intermingled with the reference yet again to his car and how they're even for his car and Dick's smirk... I loved it sm.

I loved that Kory checked his ass about Project Icarus when he got into the porche before she could drive off. He's so quick to be like, "Babe, I didn't even know nothing." XDDD Honestly, it's giving husband and wife. It had me dying.

"We're stronger together; you know we are." - STOP IM SOBBING. I really loved that line.

Dick's eyes are literally trained on Kory so. much. in this episode. He is concerned af and I am so here for it.

Dick's concern in the lab when she is awol is so cute like he is STRESSIN' but we love to see it.

LOL, Dick at the doors like, "BERNARD!" Like fuck man, give him a second! XD He called out like 3 times and was so impatient, it was hilarious. He was really giving, "My wife is in there with a psycho pls open the fucking doors." XD

Dick's fighting was so love fuelled, i don't care what anyone says. He literally fights like not my alien Princess, you don't, you dick! xD I'm probs delusional but all I could think was Dick's more pissed cos Kory is in danger.

Dick was so hopeful after Sebastian went down. He was like woo, yeah, we did it, it's over. Let's throw him into space, no dead Kory today. And she is just like... I'm sorry and dfhjhsdlkh. I was in pain. You can see him crumbling and is still trying to find ways for her not to do this. I had full on tears in my eyes.

The face caress like... it's so painful. He looks so crestfallen. I cannot.

"I don't know how to do that... I can't" - He sounded so broken, my poor dumbass!! I was in pain with this whole sequence.

Dick's tearfilled eyes - I was honestly so emosh; Anna and Brenton did that scene so well.

I really love the pause on Dick whilst they think Kory is dead like it's as if he knows or legit just cannot fathom Kory being gone.

HIS LIL WALK BACK OVER TO HER ONCE SHE COMES DOWN FROM SPACE. IT WAS A WALK WITH PURPOSE. You CANNOT tell me he wasn't instantly like, "Ima kiss her" when she came back to Earth. He had that determination in his eyes. She was getting thoroughly kissed.

THE KISS!!!!! SQUEEEEEE. Guys, I fucking died. I know it was a very long time coming and overdue but it was a good kiss. Dick diving in for a second kiss made me melt. I loved it.

The boys all grinning in the back had me smilinggg. Whether it was cos mom and dad were kissing or cos Kory wasn't dead, Idc it was cute.

Kory's lil 'Whoa' after the kiss was so adorable.

THE HAND ON HER BACK. Dick's hand was glued to her as they went over for the group hug. He was not letting go and it was... so cute.

Honestly, Dick's heart eyes again at Dinner where she's like "Guess you never know what the future holds" and his smile like fuck man, she's yours. Quit it alreadyyy!

Sighhh, the whole conversation when they were alone was great and I espesh loved, "They're not even leaving us Krypto" XD

The 'It's weird' 'What? You and I alone together?' was cute and ughhhhh I was dying.

The damn stroller with the red balloon. We see you, Titans. GOD! I liked that we got the subtle hint without a flashforward to having had Mar'i. I put this in the tags of a reblog and like I would have still sobbed at that but I like the subtle route a lot.

LOL DICK's "Maybe we should get on that" HAD ME CHOKING HAHAHA like BRO, you are leaping ahead. Even Kory took a minute looking at him like is this guy for real rn?? Man went from 'I don't do feelings' to 'I've picked the paint for our baby's nursery' lightning fast XDDD. But, they defo went home after and slept together after those drinks. You can't convince me otherwise.

They were so giddy and cutesy. Like, ugh I'm not over it. I'm on such a dickkory high.

I LOVE the ending on the bridge. Sunshine Kory skipping ahead and holding hands with and dragging her smiley yet grumpy Dick along. It just felt so them and the little bubbly action from Kory felt VERY her. Like it really sang, Kory to me.

I'm so happy they ended with Dickkory in a place so happy and in love - it rarely happens in DC so I am thrilled.

Guys, I know at times, it felt neverending and I'm with other DK fans. I really wish they had done this with Dickkory earlier in the show, I really do. I feel like we could have skipped some exes and other shit and got to this point with them a lot sooner but it is what it is.

I'm actually just so happy that they ended it on such a fluffy, lighthearted note for them. Like, they are so loved up at the end of the show and it just makes me happy that we got that. Could they have done more with them through the whole show? Absolutely. Could they have gotten to this point with them earlier? Also, absolutely.

But, I am grateful for the moments through each season that we got with them. Like, I think if I was to rewatch from S1, bearing in mind that Dick's basically been a goner since the night at the motel in S1, I feel like the seasons and episodes would feel different.

I'm just really grateful that I have another show that gave me dickkory content. I've followed them through multiple versions. TT Cartoon, DCAU, comics, TT Cartoon comics, TTG (in parts), Live action... like I just love them in every universe, including this one even if it's been trying at times.

But, there was nothing ambiguous about this ending for me. The point is to end them on a high all giggly and happy and thoroughly in love. I look forward to the fic writers for live action dickkory to cook up some beautiful fics after this just to keep the joy going.

I WISH there could have been an S5 to see Dick and Kory in an actually established place but that's what imaginations are for and luckily for me, I can imagine dickkory scenarios til the cows come home XD.

I've really enjoyed this version of them. It's been different but I still love them. I love Brenton as Dick and Anna as Kory respectively and I think their chemistry has worked so well in this show and it doesn't hurt that they are so close in real life. It's really sweet.

Idk, I have no issues with how they were ended. I was scared we wouldn't get a kiss but that kiss was adorable and ugh the last scene on the bridge just makes me so smiley, even now after hours of rewatching it XD

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Titans - Whole Show - Thoughts

I have always been very back and forth with Titans, I won't lie and tbh, anyone that follows me or knows me, knows that I've dipped in and out of Titans constantly.

However, going into Titans, I have ALWAYS said from day dot one that I was watching it for three specific things. Kory, Gar & Dickkory. That was it, hence I've never really cared for much beyond those things so my opinion will be wildly different from others, I am sure.

Season 1 got me invested. I loved the core four; hated the fucking pigeons and will die on my hill that they were a waste of screen time. But, our core four were the best thing about the first season, it was amazing.

Season 2 I enjoyed greatly but I did pull back a little but there were moments that brought me back in. And, there were some characters like Donna that reeled me back in cos I love her and I enjoyed hers and Kory's friendship as well as her friendship with Dick. I liked the storyline since Slade has always been a Titans douchebag but we love him.

Season 3, lmao, I dropped, I won't lie. I watched pieces from mutuals and sought out scenes and episodes of interest but honestly, it died a little for me in S3. It was based in Gotham and it had a tiny rekindle of another ship which... I saw zero value in doing. I was so anti season 3 lmao.

Season 4 pulled me right back in as it reminded me of S1. We'd lost the annoying af birds and it was back to core four plus Tim and Conner but like I was fully on board for them cos they didn't deter from the team vibe. Whereas, other side characters absolutely did and it was frustrating. Season 4 has definitely been my favourite season in the show.

It probably goes Seasons 4, 1, 2 & 3 tbh.

I've always had issues with Titans in various forms but y'know what? Overall, I've loved watching it. I wish some things had done better but I still loved the show that was given to fans overall.

I'm so sad it's ended but I am glad to have had some fan interactions through the course of the show. Dickkory fans especially know the DK desert is dry af most of the time so this was really nice to have the tag vibing most of the time.

I'm sad to see the show go and I hope we don't have to wait long to get something else Titans related that isn't a fucking backwards af comic from the assholes at DC. The irony, huh? XD

Thanks, Titans. It's been fun.

Dickkory friends, I look forward to forthcoming art and fics to read cos I need them to keep me on the high for the next few weeks. XD

P.S, well done if you actually read this whole thing. You're either amazing or insane. <3

[artswaps]

I'm sorry you had a rough day... what types of things do you think Keith feels the most anxiety over? Is he usually unable to recover from it quickly?

It’s all good, nonnie, just had a bit of an embarrassing misunderstanding with a coworker, haha… my awful communication skills strike again ;__;

I kinda rambled a lot more than I meant to so I’ll pop this under a cut?

Boop:

Hmm Keith and anxiety…. I’m currently wading through brain fog so apologies if this is less than coherent lmao. Keith doesn’t exactly experience anxiety in the same way someone like Hunk does, does he? He doesn’t get caught up in his head and start imagining every way a situation can go wrong, not in the sense that he lets it get in the way of getting the job done.

However he personally feels about a situation, if there’s something that needs doing, then he’ll power through.

We have someone like Hunk, a character who canonically is shown to have anxiety that sometimes he needs help calming down from in order to get back on task… and then we have Keith, who deliberately puts his own feelings on the backburner, considering them unimportant in comparison to the mission.

First of all I imagine there’s something to be said about his instincts here? Like, if Keith’s in a situation where he knows something is wrong, he feels unsettled or anxious but doesn’t know why, it’s just an instinctual nagging that there’s danger. I think that’s something he wouldn’t need to recover from to think clearly, but rather he’d use that foreboding feeling as an indicator to keep his guard up and stay alert. It’s help him focus on what’s amiss rather than scatter his thoughts, maybe.

tbh Keith is actually very confident in his own abilities and limitations, (at least… pre-season 3 keith lol) so (and gosh sorry i really am too low on energy to know how to word this properly) more tactile or physically demanding situations that might make other people anxious- eg. going into the gross Weblum stomach or launching himself out of an airlock or driving his hoverbike straight off a cliff (everyone screaming in fear while Keith just smirks and delivers that self-assured “yup :)” always makes me laugh a little, lol)- though uncomfortable and maybe sometimes confronting for him, aren’t something that would cause anxiety. 

Things that make Keith anxious are more interpersonal things, I reckon; he has trauma from his past that causes not exactly a fear of rejection, but an expectation that he will eventually be rejected/abandoned. I imagine there’s a certain feeling of anxiety he carries with him that’s just… him waiting for the ball to drop, sometimes. Telling him not to get too close, because it won’t last and that’s just how things are.

There’s the fear over losing Shiro, someone who he loves and trusts implicitly because Shiro has earned that love and trust from Keith, but even then Keith’s still anxious about Shiro disappearing again (maybe because Shiro unintentionally kept putting that fear in the poor guy’s head by pushing that whole “hey Keith if anything ever happens to me” spiel, oh shiro…. shiro, buddy…..)

I think he’s anxious to a certain degree about letting Shiro down, because Shiro is Keith’s favourite person who has apparently changed Keith’s life in such a MASSIVE way and has so much faith in Keith. And though Shiro doesn’t consider that as a debt that needs repaying, there’s a good chance Keith does. Maybe that puts a bit of pressure on him to succeed, and causes him anxiety when he feels he’s messed up in Shiro’s eyes. 

So, those are some things that Keith maybe feels anxious about. But the thing is, like I said, Keith doesn’t give his own personal feelings about things the priority, pretty much ever. If there’s a job to be done, then no matter what he’ll power through. 

Eg. When Allura was still giving him the cold shoulder while she was coming to terms with the fact that he was part Galra, Keith (imo, anyway) hadn’t even considered the possibility that all she needed was time- he’d already accepted the fact that she had rejected him. He was undeniably hurting because in his eyes, it meant he’d lost a friend- he was Galran and she was Altean and it wasn’t either of their faults, it’s just how it was. 

But he didn’t let it hold him back from getting the job done, he focused on the mission and directed all his attention to the task at hand.

What I’m trying to say (and I hope I’m making at least a lil bit of sense) is that Keith definitely feels anxiety about certain things, but he never allows himself to address it. He ignores his own feelings, sometimes to the point where he believes them to be selfish because they distract from the mission and the mission is priority. So he doesn’t necessarily “recover” from fits of anxiety because he forces it so far back into his mind and already accepts his fears as truths. He’ll just accept that that’s how things are, and it’s something he has to power through because there’s things to be done that are more important. 

Which actually brings up another possibility, that he feels anxiety over being selfish, making what he thinks are selfish choices, wanting to persue his own goals eg. making choices for himself like wanting to know about his Blade in 2.08 and investigating his heritage but worrying about how self-serving those choices are and how they detract from what he’s contributing to the war effort…

hmm. Lots to think about. Maybe when I’m feeling more coherent. If anyone has thoughts though come talk to me!!

Oh, also??? Snakes. Kid lived in a desert and he knows the drill with how to live around snakes so he’s prepared and informed for what to do if you’re bitten but like…… c’mon. Snakes are snakes and no one *wants* to be bitten….. ya gotta be wary around those guys…..

[ae0nx]

FRUITS BASKET S3 EPISODE 8 RECAP AKA THE KYORU CHRONICLES PART 2 (plus a quick recap of eps 3-7)

aaaaaaAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!! I gotta get it out of me otherwise I won't be able to concentrate on work and I will be scrolling through the tag till the day I die. Everything from episode 3 of Season 3 literally hit me like an avalanche - literally cos I marathoned 3-7 over the weekend which I wouldn't advise unless you want an accelerated heartbeat - and I'm starting to realise... maybe I just wasn't ready for season 3. Despite asking for it, haha. Not gonna put as many screencaps for this one cos tumblr editing bay be trippin and I just don't have time nor emotional energy to be fighting with the picture uploads, sorry lol

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Episodes 3 - 7

I spoke before about how (despite my feelings about the characters) the English dub VAs for Akito and Shigure pair up really well audibly. And I think I feel the same way about both Yuki and Machi's English VAs! They both have the same soft spoken yet scratchy element to their voices almost like they are holding slightly back. Although, I'd argue that Yuki has been losing the element of slightly holding back as the anime has gone on which I wonder if the same would be included for Machi's performance?

I really like the presentation of Machi's trauma through her family's expectations to be perfect and how physical it is? How Yuki kind of encourages her to let it out in a healthy way? (Btw the whole chalk breaking scene in the meeting was SO FUCKING SMOOTH. YUKI IS A NERD BUT HE IS SO EFFORTLESSLY COOL A LOT OF THE TIME)

The age gap between Isuzu and Haru for sure isn't the worst age gap in this anime/manga but it's still a bit... hmm...

Episode 4:

In all seriousness, I know Akito deserves some sympathy but it doesn't change the fact that I still see her as a villain. Hurt people hurt people but it doesn't mean they should get away with it, I was honestly pleased Haru got that big confrontation with Akito to tell her WHAT'S WHAT but it was also somewhat... merciful?

Hiro's growth has been so beautiful to see, him realising there are bigger things than him from the event with Rin to his relationship with Kisa to then the birth of his little sister.

Kureno choosing to get his hands a little dirtier and paying the ultimate price for it (as far as we know so far in the anime lol) was great, he is the moon side of Tohru's sunshine.

Shigure... I still don't really get him and Akito's relationship. It's clear he's waiting for Akito to grow the fuck up but at the same time he's not creating an environment for her to grow and develop. He's decided to go with the 'tough love' route which I'm still deciding whether I like it or not tbh. Sometimes it feels necessary, at other times it feels shitty. I respect that he knows he's a scumbag and I don't deny that there are people out there who take revelry in the fact that they are awful but at the same time, him remaining unchanging despite everything feels... unrealistic. But considering throughout this story he doesn't seem affected by trauma, it's understandable, I guess?

Also... that scene where Shigure ponders about whether he should've been with Tohru is THE creepiest creeper shit he's EVER done in this series. No. 🙅🏾‍♀️

Momiji is best bunny boi regardless of how tall and 'manly' he becomes. 🐰His scene with Akito was so authentically him and he really did that shit. We love him. <3

I love the way that the curse breaking should (on surface) be a happy event considering all the trauma the zodiac went through because of it but it's presented mostly as loss as well as happiness. It's the realness of getting out of a bad relationship

Shigure basically laying it out to Tohru how Kyo means nothing in a very taunting way was an excellently painful scene and I choose violence. It was heartbreaking seeing how worthless they all saw Kyo compared to how Tohru saw him but... by this point I was just living in the pain so 🤷🏾‍♀️

The story visually showing how Isuzu is more willing to be soft after her whole ordeal through her fashion choices (e.g. the pastels, the cardigans) was really nice. And Haru being happy about Isuzu making friends with Tohru was cute!

It was nice we saw that Kazuma was still wary about whether Tohru loved Kyo for the right reasons, you'd assume after everything Kazuma would love Tohru as a match for Kyo but he's so emotionally intelligent and also just a protective Dad! Yay, good parenting!

Tohru's confession to loving Kyo was amazing however I still adore Kyo's confession a little bit more. Just a bit. Lol. However, if you add the moment later in episode 8 it trumps it completely. Ethereal goddess.

Kyo and Tohru's grandfather having a scene together was great and nice

Now that I think about it, I wish there was more a visual link in the story between Tohru adapting her speech to imitate her Dad and Momiji adopting his Mum's German accent. Albeit for slightly different reasons, it just adds to the unique connection Tohru and Momiji have. In short, I'm seeing this ship with my third eye now. I get it lol

I don't wanna screencap the scene where Kyo is haunted by both his deceased mother and deceased Kyoko and potentially deceased Tohru because it's the stuff of nightmares. But, it was a wonderfully done scene. You definitely understand fully and clearly why Kyo buried all of that trauma under his hatred for Yuki (I CAN'T WAIT FOR EPISODE 9, YOU GUISE!)

If Akito is a villain, Ren is the final boss. Although, with her type of villainy... I feel like I can kind of enjoy a bit more. She reminds me of a Greek God in the ways she master manipulates people and her desperation for control and power (I just read 'Mythos' by Stephen Fry, it's a great read lol)

It lowkey feels like every female character who's comfortable in expressing their sexuality in this story is punished in some way for it... this is an incomplete thought

Shigure as a child feeling like they should all be pitied is so... mature... I feel like I need more of an explanation for why Shigure is the way he is

Akito's ego death with Kureno? Amazing. I loved that she was at least aware enough to realise how Kureno had been coddling her all this time but again... doesn't excuse her crimes

But anyways...

EPISODE 8

Honestly? I really don't have much to say about this episode besides 3-5 points I wanna get out of my head. It's not a bad thing at all, it's just that there's still a lot left to play out from this 'arc' and this season in general that I wanna complete my thoughts on.

But I'll start with this:

Lol, isn't it funny?! Isn't it heart-wrenchingly funny how the relationship between Kyo and Tohru has kinda reverted back to how they were at the start of the series? The coldness of Kyo at the beginning of this episode (and throughout) was a bit of a gut punch considering all the light and fluffy moments that we've gotten between the two since the True Form arc.

Talking about the True Form arc, I feel like this episode is somewhat a repeat of the same emotions, same trials of the True Form arc. Kyo still 'runs away like he always has' but this time we get him being the most honest and confrontational with his own emotions and trauma than he ever has been during the course of this whole story. While trusting someone (Tohru specifically) for the first time with the whole truth of his story! He always seems to move one step forward and then three steps backwards and while it's a tad bit frustrating, it feels very... real. I'll probably complete my feelings how this arc reflects the True Form arc when we finish this section of the story in future episode(s).

Considering the fact that 80% of this episode is Jerry Jewell monologuing as Kyo and I never got bored really just sells his performance. Kyo was being incredibly cold this episode and yet the range of emotions through his performance made it feel understandable enough for you to empathise with it.

BrattyKid!Kyo to lighten the mood 😹I still wish he and Hiro had more of a relationship, I feel like they could have taught each other a lot. Well... mostly Kyo teaching Hiro tbh

Kyo rejecting Kyoka for her honesty and kindness and then later rejecting Tohru? Oh... kid...

Wow, I felt so good about that whole episode of Kid!Yuki helping Kid!Tohru get home and then it's slightly soured knowing KID!KYO was running about the streets alllll night into the morning?!?! I really did feel Kyo's frustration at not getting that win to actually do something right. And the irony of that being linked to him being unable to save Kyoka from the oncoming car?

Honestly, I don't know what my feelings are on Kyo being unable to save Kyoka. I don't even know what my feelings are on Tohru pretty much pushing that aside in favour of her feelings for Kyo. It's... complicated and I've been mulling it over in my head for the last 10+ years hahah However, if I was in Tohru's position I think I'd eventually come to a point where it feels like it's too late to really do anything about how bad I'd feel about it. Kyo's intentions weren't horrid, if anything he was just being a scared kid and he's allowed to be that. I just wish Tohru had a bit more time to evaluate it but considering she knew her mother well and assumes that wouldn't have been the full scope of what she had said, I don't have much of a problem with it in general

Lol, I love when Tohru gets a 'FUCK YOU, I LOVE YOU' moment with Kyo. 😂Another reflected scene from the True Form arc... only thing is that this time... it doesn't quite work. 😕

(Again, I love how all of these reflections are resolved in later occurences in response to the duality but I'll get to it next week when it shows hopefully)

Laura Bailey only had a few sentences in this episode but she killed it as always. Comparing her performance in 2001 to now is just... growth!

Ok, so Yuki automatically gets Best Boi in this episode for meddling and chasing after KYO of all people. Showing how he's personally done with hating Kyo. Realising Kyo is pretty much the only person who'll make his mother happy. I think he also lowkey wants to understand Kyo? But, we'll get to that next week.

....Oh yeah, Akito is there.

--------------------------------------------------------------

In total, I liked this episode even though it has me anxious for the next one. We finally get the full picture of why Kyo is the way he is! Ahhhh - a weight off all our chests, I'm sure. I kinda don't like that they put the ending theme at the end of these episodes - the joyfulness doesn't really match up with the intense theme? But, that's just a minor gripe. And hey, maybe they just want the audience to know... it's all gonna be okay :)

See you next week!!!

[palimpsessed]

So @captain-aralias​ did one of these and invited other writers to do the same. And I wasn't really going to because it feels a bit late now and also I've done quite a few other year in review posts for 2020. But then I got to thinking that it would be really nice to have one of these for each year to look back on and compare, which convinced me. So, here we go!

If you’re a writer, I’d also encourage you to steal this. Tag me on your post so I can see your thoughts! 🥰

List of Complete Fics for 2020 1. At the Top of a Tower, With You- General, 900 words 2. Use Your Words- Teen, 16k 3. A Man of Letters, or Five Times Baz Retreats and the One Time He Doesn’t- Teen, 54k 4. To the Manor Borne- Teen, 43k

Total: 4 fics, 113k words

Every one of these fics was written for an event, which, realistically, is the only reason they got finished. I have so many ideas I'm working on all at once, and I came into fandom with a focus on making art, so to actually find the motivation to sit down and write/finish/post a fic was entirely deadline based. And it's a technique I'm sure I will also employ in 2021.

Best/Worst Title?

Well, I've mentioned a few times before that I usually have a title before I have much in the way of a fic concept. I don't really dislike any of the my titles, because they all did exactly what I needed them to do, which was help me focus on what I wanted to accomplish in the fic. Comparatively speaking, though, I can answer this.

Best: Use Your Words - succinct, idiomatic, a book quote/motif that also has the potential to be a spell, does what it says on the tin, is probably what all of us are constantly yelling at Baz and Simon to do throughout the books and the fic itself

(Honorable mention to A Man of Letters because that title forms a perfect heart shape when viewed on mobile on AO3. ❤️)

Worst: At the Top of a Tower, With You - this is also a quote and it fits the fic perfectly, but it is a bit of a mouthful and it has a comma in the middle of it, which, while I love commas, feels a bit off-putting in terms of a title - also, it's always kind of bothered me that it's a Baz WS quote used for a CO-era Lucy POV

Best/worst summary?

Again, I don't really dislike any of my summaries.

Best:

To the Manor Borne: The gang decides to spend Christmas together at Pitch Manor. Romance, hijinks, and holiday cheer ensue.

Anything that lets me use the word hijinks is always good! - it's short and sweet - it does a fair job of setting up the premise for the fic and giving highlights, without giving anything away

Worst: A Man of Letters

I'm not going to include this one because it's so long, I had to cut down the version I posted on tumblr to fit in the AO3 field, which is really why I rank it below my others - it effectively sets up the world of Simon and Baz in Regency England prior to where the story starts, but it is prohibitively long - and it's set up, not summary, so it also loses points for not doing what it purports to do - I could have said exactly what this fic was in one sentence: "Simon and Baz meet at several Regency-appropriate venues over the course of a London season and reflect on their acquaintance in letters", but instead I did the full book jacket version because it was more interesting to me.

Best/Worst First Line?

Oh, this is interesting. I can honestly say that I have no idea where this will go. Going to pull up my docs and find out! Okay, since I only have four fics to consider, and I'm feeling split, I'm going to do two for each. I feel good about my words, but I will say that half of my first lines actually provide information, and the other half are incomplete thoughts. Those were stylistic decisions I made, but when taken alone, it does somewhat limit the effectivness of a sentence when it can't stand without the rest of the paragraph. Perhaps that decision will lure readers in for more?

Best:

In the end, we wind up at Pitch Manor. (To the Manor Borne)

I know that you won't be surprised when I tell you that I do not like writing letters. (A Man of Letters)

Kind of interesting that these both contain key words from the titles 🤔

Worst:

I'm not sure how I'm supposed to do this. (Use Your Words)

I love how the title seems to be answering Baz's question when the two are put together like this 😂

Strange that it should end here, where it all started. (At the Top of a Tower, With You)

The title also seems to complete the first line in this one, too. I'm learning about my writing as this goes on, so that's cool!

Best/Worst Last Line?

Hmm. Okay, again, no idea. Also, a little leery of including last lines for anyone who hasn't read the fics they're from yet. (Tho I guess it's unlikely those people would be reading this😆) But let's see what we've got.

Use Your Words and A Man of Letters have very similar final lines, and both are somewhat spoilery.

Best: The ending of A Man of Letters felt risky to me, in the way that it is formatted and changes tone from the rest of the story. It was something that happened as I wrote it and I loved it. I had no idea if readers would like it, if they would feel like it worked as an ending, but I felt strongly enough about it to let the entire fic hinge on that and I think it really paid off. So, without giving you the actual last line, which is only one word, I'm going to say that one is my best ending.

Worst:

To the Manor Borne: "Carry on, Simon."

It's not bad, it's just not mine.

Looking back, did you write more fics than you thought you would this year, fewer than you thought, or about what you predicted?

I did not set out to write any fics in 2020. I was supposed to be taking a break from writing. I've been an aspiring novelist for half my life now, and have been going through major ups and downs with my writing. I decided I needed to re-evaluate and figure out if writing was something that was even going to be able to make me happy anymore. The answer is: YES! Just…not original fiction. At the moment. I'm happiest when I can write for the sake of writing and not have to DO something with that writing. Which is why discovering fan fiction was AMAZING!!!! 🥰🥰🥰

To actually answer the question, yes, I wrote more than I thought I would. I also wrote exactly as much as I thought I would, simply because these were all things I signed up for (with the exception of my Countdown fic, but I committed to it as if it were something that required a sign up).

I have a lot more ideas for 2021, but I don't know how many of them will come to fruition. I'm not putting pressure on myself to have to do anything beyond what I sign up for again, because it did work out so well for me starting off.

What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted last year?

I mean, the pairing and the fandom were in no way a surprise. 😆 They're my only ones, so those were both a given. The genre is also not surprising.

What's your favorite story this year? Not the most popular, but the one that makes you the happiest?

A Man of Letters, without any hesitation. I adore it so much. It's the kind of fic I know I will unabashedly sit down to read over and over, even if I'm the one who wrote it. I had one reader to please and it was ME. By far, my most self-indulgent fic.

Okay, NOW your most popular story?

That depends on the metric.

To the Manor Borne leads in Comments (107), Kudos (153), and Hits (1992), and Use Your Words leads in Bookmarks (26).

But since To the Manor Borne is top in 3 out of 4 metrics, I'll say that one.

Story most upderappreciated by the universe?

I mean, the least popular by a wide margin is At the Top of a Tower, With You, but I don't know if I'd call it underappreciated. It's short, it's angsty, it's got a very unusual style, it's Lucy POV, it's the first fic I wrote and posted. I didn't really go into it with high performance expectations. I'm proud of it, I just didn't expect it to be popular. It would be nice if more people read it, but I'm not broken up over it.

Story that could have been better?

I'm not even going to touch this one. Everything can always be improved upon, but if I go down that route, nothing will ever be done. This is one of the things I have come to appreciate about traditional art versus digital. With traditional, there is only so much you can do before something is permanent and you have to live with it. It's an exercise in letting go and acceptance. Digital is flashier and more flexible, but I could (and have) spend months on a single piece and never feel satisfied, never stop tweaking. I think that's also the reason I started to hate my novels.

Sexiest story?

Based purely on overall vibes, I find the understated tension of the Regency the most appealing, so I'm going to say A Man of Letters. I didn't actually stray into sex territory in any of my fics (though Simon and Baz have had sex by the time To the Manor Borne starts, and refer to it, and probably do it "offscreen"), but A Man of Letters is the one that feels sexiest to me. Lots of thirsting!Baz and feral!Simon and sensual hand touching (how risqué!) - and YEARNING. That, to me, is the sexiest vibe of all. So. Much. Yearning.

Saddest story?

At the Top of a Tower, With You - for this one, I tagged "angst without plot" and I stand by that. It's Lucy losing her connection to Simon at the end of CO and trying to find a way to reconcile herself to leaving him alone again. I gave it as much of a hopeful bent as I could, with the refrain of Baz's spoken "love" to cling to, but it's very sad.

Most fun?

To the Manor Borne - All of my fics have their fair share of angst, but this one also has some good, silly, holiday fluff thrown in. Since I wrote it for the Countdown, each chapter was based on a different prompt, which led to this one going in all sorts of directions no single fic probably ever should. Plus, it has the most Shepard, and Shepard always makes things more fun.

Story with the single sweetest moment?

Oh my god. I don't know. No, never mind. I do. It's To the Manor Borne, but it's split between the two gift giving scenes, the Constellations and Secret Santa/Gift Giving prompts. These were private moments between Simon and Baz, sharing themselves with each other, being vulnerable, and communicating. It's the gifts they give each other, yes, but it's more so the reasons they chose those gifts, and how they show part of themselves and share their love for each other, through those gifts, that had me in tears writing those two scenes. I'm super proud of them.

Hardest story to write?

Use Your Words - it was written for an exchange and that made it really hard to write it knowing there was this pressure of making my gift-ee happy with the fic. I'm proud of it, and they really liked it, but the anxiety was too much for me.

Easiest/most fun story to write?

A Man of Letters - if there is a fic better suited to me as a writer, I haven't met it. I started writing after reading Pride and Prejudice in high school, so I started out writing Regency and I spent years and years and years of my life obsessed. When I transferred into college, an administrator I had never met before heard my name during orientation and said, "Oh, you're the Austen scholar." (It is a small, private college, and I was a transfer, so the pool of students was even smaller. But still. Many years later, I'm clearly not over it.) I also did my senior thesis on an epistolary novel (Frances Burney’s Evelina), and my English Lit emphasis was for that time period. So, I felt like I had been preparing for this fic my entire adult life. 😂

Did any stories shift your perceptions of the characters?

I don't think so. I tend to let my writing be dictated by the characters, so I'm always following their lead. Sometimes they'll do or say something that surprises me and takes me down a route I didn't necessarily foresee, but I don't think there was ever a point where one of them did something that made me rethink who they are as a character.

Most overdue story?

I will say A Man of Letters, since that one felt like a culmination of my seventeen-year-old self's wildest writing dreams. But I should probably say the Scooby Doo AU I still haven't managed to finish, because that one has been a WIP since I joined the fandom. Oops. (I'm hoping when I look over this in a year, I can feel smug that it's finally done.)

Did you take any writing risks this year? What did you learn from them?

Writing at all was a risk for me! And writing fan fic for the very first time! Writing an entire fic told only through letters. And then ending it in a completely different style from the rest of the fic. Doing a multi-chaptered fic for the Countdown, using a different prompt for each chapter, and publishing a chapter every single day for thirty days (with the exception of two days that had art). Signing up for fandom events in the first place!

What I learned from taking risks in my writing is the same thing I learned when I took risks in my art this year. I have a much better appreciation for what I've done when I push myself, I feel better about the end product, and I like it longer. I think it's really good for me to challenge myself creatively.

This year's theme and the story that demonstrates it most?

Oh boy. Um. Therapy! Both Use Your Words and To the Manor Borne had their big HEA moments built around sending Simon and Baz to therapy. I don't think that's likely to change for future fics, either. I feel like therapy as the theme for 2020 seems very fitting. (Also, I think I keep sending the boys to therapy because I'm trying to get myself there…)

What are your fic writing goals for next year?

Just to write what I want to write, have fun, not put any pressure on myself, and to take risks in my writing and my art because it will help me to grow.

[astro-break]

Thoughts on the third ep of Hypmic Rhythm Anima (as always, spoilers beware but not only for the anime itself but for future things covered in the Drama CD and the Manga. If you’re an anime only, those are marked with a *)

Right off the bat. Super disappointed that it isn’t a MTC episode. I wanted an MTC episode. :((((

Still got my MTC crumbs this week tho and I think I can hold out until next week which hopefully will give me the MTC episode I so desperately want (Yes, i have a division bias and i’m not afraid to show it)

Jakurai entertaining kids are just so cute. I think its very very precious.

* Also. What kind of doctor is Jakurai anyways? So far we know that he’s a councilor/therapist (helps Doppo w/ his anxiety), a pediatrician (he helped a kid), a family doctor (I think i might be wrong on this one), a surgeon (In the FP vs MTC manga he’s shown preforming surgery), a hitman/assassin (:/ yeah evil line records seems intent on retconning this one), a battle field medic (he’s state to be one during WWIII) and now he’s getting called into the orthopedic (things concerning the musculoskeletal system) and gastroenterology (working w. the digestive system) department, two things that have nothing in common with each other. And I’m sure I’m missing some. There is no way in hell this man can do all that he’s 35 for fucks sake. You’d be old and grey before you could learn and complete the credentials needed to work half of these jobs

Nice to now that theres some hints of jakurai’s past. I have a feeling that we’ll be seeing more of the detective later in the story, esp for Matenrou

Doppo being overworked as usual *sigh*. When will the man ever rest? Never... Though im a bit skeptical as to why one of his co-workers calls him doppo. this is a work environment, usually he’d be called “Kanonzaka” for the least amount of informality. seems sus to me. Though his depiction of his insecurities is nice

I love how his first reaction is to call Hifumi and as him if he’s killed anyone. Peak bromance guys. 

Honestly Doppo’s method of trying to calm down is nice but not at all effective. He has the right mindset of calming down and letting his body breath, but the way he goes about it is... eh. 

Tom and Iris’ argument is hilarious and I really want to see more of them and Rex! Can’t wait to see what happens with these three new characters

Iasdgfjsd;flkasjdflkasdjfkasdlvn ajsdk, MTCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC

MY BPOYS OH MY GOD RIOU NEVER CHANGE

fsajghasdf i love them asdhfoiksldjfasdfj riou’s food looks so so so so so good omgggggg

Samatoki respecting the fuck outta Jakurai is amazing and I never get tired of their father-child kind of relationship (yes jakurai is a dad to TDD fight me.)

The Riou and Samatoki interactionnnnnnnnnnnn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ah my heart!! they know each other so well and play off each others strengths. its so cute and I love how Samatoki knows his teammates well enough to know when to play each of his pieces. He isn’t just some brute who speaks through his fists, but he does use his head too. I think this is one of the reasons why he’s also high up on the Yakuza ladder since he’s not only brawny but also brainy

EAT RIOUS FOOD SAMATOKI

ah yes, Jyuto kneeing a bitch. just what I needed to see on a stressful friday thank you for feeding me

I love MTC, im very happy with the MTC crumbs. Since MTR showed up in BB’s ep last week, i really really hope that next week’s ep will be MTC

There it is. Jakurai’s “Jitsuni Kyoumibukai” line

lolololololol the sound effects for MTR is hilarious. Though please give Doppo a break, man deserves it

Jaku’s hair man. its beautiful

Again, please give Doppo a break, he deserves with the 4 joints that they attacked

They say 3 times, but they attacked 4 places?? Did they not report one of them?

Ahhhhh the DoHifu interaction on the temple grounds is both hilarious and cute. Though I can’t help but feel bad for Doppo

* Huh, Jaku did you get that from your hitman days loll

Oh man host mode. Though I like how Doppo recognizes when Host Mode is  a legitimate shield that Hifumi needs and is willing to give him that shield when he needs it. God I love their dynamic]

wow... yet another female stalker for Hifumi... very original. This is pretty similar to the stalker girl from the manga and CD

Lol callback to when Doppo was in the toilet and trying to calm down. 

pffft the girl is so weird. I can’t stand her or Uwabami. 

The plot is so convoluted holy shit. Is this a drama now? (I’ve never watched any c-dramas or k-dramas so I’m the furthest thing from a voice of authority but this seems like a drama show plot lmao.)

This is just a drama at this point lol. Misunderstandings, plot twists and cheesy shit all over the place. Its a badly written and hilarious drama thats for sure

Someone please write a fic where instead of the hypmic universe, the boys are all in a tv drama show plot and their hijinks bc it would fit perfectly. please

Ah, Doppochin snapped~ He’s very interesting once he gets fired up and thats when I really really like MTR. Don’t get me wrong, I love them normally but its when they get down to it that really makes me squeal in delight

Oh! So i think each character gets their own personalized intro w/ their speakers, not just the leaders. Thats honestly so so so cool. The 3D didn’t get in the way of the sequence and was really flashy and smooth. I love how they show the transformation and reveal of the mic and speaker. Honestly the Anime has so many good takes on thigs that aren’t touched on often in the franchise.

The rap was honestly fire this time around. I love it and have replayed it almost 20 times. According to the ending credits its called Welcome U which is so cute for such a funny and badass song. The strong base beat and imagery were so strong and included a lot of homages to things that really matches both Shinjuku, Matenrou and the lyric’s themes and they’re really small but important details! The humor was on point without sacrificing any of the amazingly cool elements and the three distinct styles of rap were integrated in such a catchy melody!

EG) the verse All Year Round features a quick shot of the four seasons and the things most prominently associated with each season. Spring has cherry blossoms and flower viewing, Summer has festivals, Fall and Winter have food that corresponds to events that happen in those seasons.

Doppo’s line of “The flea counters w/ a bite” is so so so cute bc he’s got a little w at the end and thats jp chatspeak for a laugh and skjdfhsdjfkslad adorable

Hifumi picking up right after and asking if Doppo is okay is just. Goals. And his gratutious english works really well and is super smooth! Very very good

Also the small homage to The Champions with Hifumi’s “Jump around” line and the format where Hifumi takes separate lines than Jaku and Doppo. Its a brilliant way to sneak these references in and they’ve kept that theme going from last episode

Foreshadowing with “We’re the true leader, Matenro!” Nice touch there lol.

Lol of course its attempted murder. Still gotta keep this PG 13 even though theres swearing abound

The ending w/ mimimi..... leaves me kind of torn since i don’t like how it ended but they did provide some nice advice. i guess

lsdf;jsalkdfjsldf Hifumi please you’ve known Doppo for over 25 years, you should know better than anyone what his charm points are. and shouldn’t you be the one who understands Doppo’s appeal? smh

SCREEEEEEE THAT TITLE OF THE NEXT EP. if its an MTC ep i will scream even more bc asudhfsdkjflasd A friend in need is a friend indeed this is just pushing my Poly!MTC agenda isn’t it

Final thoughts:

Please please please let next week be MTC please please please

DoHifu are goals, both romantically and platonically

The rap was fire and I’m going to keep listening to it on repeat. First ep was a bit of a disappointment in terms of CGI and raps but these latest two eps are really picking up the slack! I really hope they continue this for the next two!

JAKURAI WHAT KIND OF DOCTOR ARE YOU PLEASE TELL ME

[pianoandcookiedoughlover]

jamie johnson 5x10 rant/review/me being worried about all my children

okay, so first of all, the episode was so choppy?? like, you would have scenes that were no more than 30 seconds cut into other scenes and it just felt really jarring.

but anyway, onto the individual storylines (jesus there are a lot):

zoe and kat

i just have to say this... zoe, honey, what are you wearing here

anyway, now on to the important stuff.

so proud of her for taking initiative and trying to start a women’s team, it’s really good to see in this show since we’ve only ever seen either all-boys teams or co-ed ones, and this will definitely inspire so many young female footballers out there. 

and i’m really glad they brought jack back and we get to see her improvement with archfield (i miss her a lot haha). it was really interesting to see her and zoe chat, considering how rocky their relationship was in season 3 and 4. i think they really are moving towards a better place with each other. i also thought this was very telling:

interesting how they cut this conversation in the trailer, but i genuinely think zoe has learned now. from all of the experiences she’s had over this show, she’s matured and grown so much. i really hope they don’t make her regress as a character and have her go back to being very competitive with the other girls at hawkstone.

which reminds me . . . my girls got into hawkstone!!!!! i’m so proud <3

they look so HAPPY god

now, moving on to the relationship between the two... wow. thank god zoe finally gave back the pendant, we were all waiting for this. 

i will say, when i saw this my heart just about stopped

it’s fine we’ll just write our own fanfics and tell ourselves that they’re canon

no, but seriously, i thought this scene as a whole was a really good start but could have gone so much further, and they would have had time for it if they didn’t have so many plotlines running simultaneously. but i digress. maybe i can continue on this scene as if they didn’t have a time limit, if you guys would read that?

anyway, here are just two moments that i found zoe to be really soft in (the first one was more the way she said it - i see you maddie, i know what you’re doing here):

honestly i’m just really excited to see these two at hawkstone and see what happens with them.

wow okay now we’re onto another storyline

jamie and boggy

well. this entire scene honestly was really revealing.

boggy is in a horrible state right now. it looks like we might get some resolution(?) in the next episode with his storyline, or at least it’s going to get to a breaking point. i just want to give him the hug he so desperately needs. i don’t want to comment too much on this yet until we get to see the next episode, because i think we are going to get a lot of content regarding his anxiety.

i might make another post talking about what jamie said in this scene because i think there’s a lot to unpack there and i don’t want to drag this post on too much.

dillon

now, we didn’t get to see too much of him, but i’m glad they’re making an effort to make sure his story is continued on-screen in every episode.

so, when his dad said this, i was smiling a bit:

and then i threw my phone when he said this:

his excuse for “wanting to protect” dillon is just bs. he only cares about whether or not foxborough would kick him out because of his sexuality, which if they did would be insane and it shouldn’t be a club he aspires to go to anyway. and he only cares about that because he wants dillon to become a professional. that’s it. he doesn’t care about the homophobia he may face and all of the horrible attacks that are made on people in the lgbtq+ community daily. 

i was a bit surprised when becky suggested that dillon give him a second chance. while yes, it was good to apologize and for him to move past his own personal prejudices (maybe? unclear), the things he said after were not second-chance worthy, in my opinion. but maybe i’m being too harsh. it would have been nice to see becky or dawn talk about their own experiences with coming out at some point - maybe one of them had a difficult time with their parents as well?

i’m glad they didn’t make this out to be some smooth process, though - his dad has betrayed dillon’s trust a lot, and it’s not going to be easy to get back.

i didn’t see anything about him in the next episode trailer thingy?? i’ll be big sad if we don’t get at least a small update

the love triangle

why oh why oh why. just . . . can we not?

i’m surprised how open eric is being about his brother’s death after how closed off he was about it in season 4. it’s nice to know that he trusts aisha enough to confide in her like that.

i honestly don’t know what they plan to do with these 3 so i’m just holding my breath hoping they don’t royally screw this up. and that’s all i’m really gonna say about that.

ruby and alba

i’m so glad they got adopted!!!! abandonment issues are really common among kids in the foster care system, so i think their initial reaction to becky and dawn’s secrecy at the beginning of the episode was realistic. i love their family so much, it’s so wholesome. and i loved the idea of the album, that was so cute.

miscellaneous

i loved this shot:

and this one:

and aisha speaks straight facts, we stan:

so that was much less of an analysis and more me just being emotional over a tv show for kids, let me know your thoughts on it and if any of the things i mentioned in this you’d be interested in reading :)

[dearlinong]

by your side ; wang ziyi

[hi ! is it okay if i request a scenario where wang ziyi is a mentor for a show you are in and its the final stage and you narrowly miss debuting with the rest of the group. he comforts you but everyone knows you both have a crush on each other? mentor au i guess,,, from a mentor or a lover?? im not sure where i was going with this, sorry if its a bit weird... thank you so much !!]

(a/n: girl holy shit i forgot that i had this in my draft and didn’t finish it wtf. i literally forgot how to do this ;-;. so.. uhm... I MISS YOU GUYS LIKE SO MUCH!! hope you guys are staying safe and staying inside your homes. i’m just clearing off all my requests and once i’m done i can continue making requests again :>. so yeah, pls tell me how guys have been doing in my ask box! so there hope you enjoy this one <3)

genre: angst plus floof

requested: YUP!! omg 2 years in the making kjnKJNAJKDNSKAJDN and sorry if it was all over the place :<

you were currently competing in the 2nd season of idol producer

and you were one of the top competitors

you’ve ben voted as top 1 for multiple times now

and not only was it because of your talent

but you think that it was also because of your friendship with ziyi (which is is bad guys lol vote contestants bc of their talent okay)

yes, you’re friends with the very famous wang ziyi

who was also one of the rap mentors in the said show

actually you two go way back

you two have been friends even before he got into simply joy music

you two were trainees for a company called faded ent

and you two were supposed to debut as a co-ed group

so you two would practice all day and all night just to perfect the dances, singing and rap you had to do

and even after those long and tiring practices you two still had time to hang out with each other

you gotta admit, those were the times that you started developing a crush on him

so when the day he told you that he was leaving the company it was basically your own personal apocalypse

not only did you lose ziyi

but you lost your chance to debut which was on the tip of your fingers at that time

so you tried your luck this time by asking your company to let you join the new season of idol producer

and to your surprise you were doing better than what you expected

as the weeks go by, you and ziyi have been catching up on each other’s lives

but only when you and him have overlapping free time which is a 5 minute break once every week, so that’s not a lot of time

and because of your closeness with him, people have been saying that he has this massive crush on you, which you totally ignored and didn’t believe

and if they were true you’d still ignore it because you were here to compete and debut, not to find love

it was currently the last week in idol producer

while all of the other trainees were fast asleep

you in particular could not sleep for some unknown reason

and what better way to tire yourself than to practice some more

so you got up and walked towards the practice rooms

you first checked if all the staffs were gone, and when they were all gone you entered the room and started practicing the dance routine for the upcoming final episode as you were still in need of some practice

20 minutes into your practicing and you hear some footsteps walking towards the practice rooms, specifically the practice room that you were in

behind the piano was a good place to hide, so you did

as the person entered the room you peeped your hear out so you could have a look at who it was

you were surprised to see that it was ziyi who entered

you were wondering why he was still in the dorms as all the mentors were supposed to be out with the other mentors

so you went out of your hiding spot

ziyi jumped in surprise as he saw you come out

“y/n? why are you here?” he asked 

“i was just practicing, but i’ll head out now, bye.” you said while rushing to head out of the room

but then he caught your wrist which made you stop

“hey, can’t you stay for a while. i really want to spend more time with you. please stay.” he said while smiling softly

you really couldn’t say ‘no’ to a guy like ziyi, so you agreed to stay with him

“so how’ve you been these past few weeks?”

“pretty good actually, but this week in particular was really draining for me and the other trainees.”

you two then eventually became comfortable with each other, like the good ol’ days

after a while you checked the clock to look at what time it was, it was almost 1 in the morning and you had to wake up early to teach the other trainees the dance for the final stage

“hey it’s getting late, better get going now.” you were about to stand up but then ziyi got your hands which stopped you from doing so

“thank you for staying with me y/n, i really miss spending time with you. i hope we can do this more often.” after saying that last word he was leaning in and getting closer to your face

he then pressed his lips to yours

you wanted to savor the moment, but a part of you says that what you’re doing is wrong

so you quickly parted with his lips and stood up

“i’m sorry ziyi, t-this just isn’t right. i have a future ahead of me, and so do you. i don’t want this to be the reason for us to fail in the future. goodbye.” after you bowed you left without even turning back

for the whole week you only thought about that moment

there were times when you couldn’t even sleep just because it was in your head

the day of the final episode has come and you’ve prepared for it since before you entered this show even

okay so this is the part where i transition from 2018 to 2020 bc im a dumb bitch and forgot to finish the au back in 2018

ok back 2 the fic

bc you already know that anything can happen during the span of these 3+ hours

the last time you checked you were still the reigning #1

and because of that you were really anxious about everything that’s gonna happen

before everything starts you guys practiced for the last time and got your last messages from the trainers

and while they were leaving ziyi handed you a small note which made all 20 trainees go BONKERS

“YIEE I KNEW THAT HE LIKED YOU!”

“I KNOW HE’S MY BIAS BUT WHAT THE HECK YOU TWO WOULD BE CUTE TOGETHER”

you became so flustered after all of them started teasing you

“YAH! Y’ALL STOP! if you guys don’t stop i won’t share my remaining facial cleanser!”

deadass everybody went silent JASNXANSDJ

and while everyone was leaving the hall you stayed behind so that you could read the note he gave you in private

it read

“i know what i did a few days ago really surprised you which made you say those words. but i know in my heart that what happened to us was right, but since you asked for it, fine i won’t bother you for now. just remember that i love you and i’m always supporting you, jiayou! with love, ziyi”

ff to the live show

the whole live show was a blur to you because you were too nervous for the final ranking

you were center for your team tho!

everyone AND I MEAN EVERYONE SCREAMED WHEN YOU WERE INTRODUCED AS CENTER

BC HELLO

YOU WERE PERFECT TO BE THE CENTER

ANYWAYS NOW ONTO THE MOMENT WE HAVE ALL BEEN DREADING

THE

FINAL

RANKING

DUN DUN DUUUUUUN

you saw some of the people you hoped to be in the final group got called and you couldn’t be happier

but sadly some of them weren’t

it’s now time to call on the prospected 1st and 2nd ranks

your anxiety levels are OFF THE CHARTS NOW as you haven’t been called yet

you were hoping to all the gods that you would turn out to be the 1st pick

or even 2nd place

but to everyones horror

your face wasn’t shown on the LED screen

which means you weren’t gonna be selected as the 1st or 2nd rank

you heard both people from the audience and from your fellow trainees a collective

“WHAT!?!?!?!?”

at this point you didn’t know what to do anymore

you felt numbness in your body

you can’t cry yet because there is still hope for the 9th place

and then it hit you

‘OH YEAH’

‘9TH PLACE’

so again with all the praying to every god thing

and then

BOOM

the 4 faces were shown on the LED screen

and luckily you were there

the PD then one by one started to announce the trainees on the screens ranks

for 12th place

it wasn’t you

for 11th place it wasn’t you either

this is it you were either in or out

you and the other trainee held hands just to relieve you both from the pressure

and then

the PD finally says the ranking

“the 9th pick is...”

“yuehua entertainment’s xi jiamo!”

that was it

all your hard work

gone

of course you were so happy for your fellow trainee

but you still have to think of yourself as well

you were then asked to give a final message

you were still in shock and didn’t know what to say yet

but you stood there and just said anything that came across your brain

“ohh, honestly i’m just so very thankful to everyone who supported me through this journey. and for every single trainee that has given me nothing but love i hope i can repay you guys some day. let’s all remember that this is not the end of our journey rather it is a stepping stone for us in order to succeed in the future. and to our dear mentors”

the audience and the trainees went wild

EVEN SOME OF THE OTHER MENTORS TOO

“i’m just very thankful that we had the opportunity to be guided by all of you, and we promise to always keep in mind everything you taught us. once again thank you for letting me stand on this stage. i will never forget this experience. thank you everyone” and then you bowed for a very long time

after the whole program all of the trainees went to the stage to congratulate the final group

but almost all of them went to you

the trainees started to flock your area and shower you with nothing but love and support

you even heard the crowd chant your name

which made you cry even more

“YAAAH! Y/N JIE I OVE YOU SO MUCH PLEASE REMEMBER THAT!”

“Y/N JIE I’M SORRY FOR TAKING YOUR SPOT!” jiamo said to you

so you had to tell her that its not her fault and she should think that way

if she thinks that way again you told her that you would be so disappointed

the staff now asked everyone to vacate the stage and go backstage

little did you know

ziyi was there waiting for you

you didn’t want to talk to him yet but the trainees insisted that you do

so they left for you two to have some privacy

once you two were alone there was nothing but silence

but he went in for a hug

which you really needed right now

a hug from one of the people that you love the most

while you two were hugging ziyi said something to you

“i know this is a really hard time for you and i just want you to know that i’ll always be by your side from now on. i’ve lost you the first time now i will never let you go”

YOU CRIED EVEN MORE BECAUSE OF THAT

you just wanted to be in his arms forever

and for now

you do stay in it

[ruffiorocks]

unpopular opinion (long post)

This might be unpopular but its irking me a little bit, im actually completely OK with Lena punching Kara in the face. 

Its not so much that Kara kept her identity a secret, that on its own doesn't warrant a smack or a punch (if they had been dating then it absolutely would) because that’s beyond disturbing behaviors, 

No for me its, as i’ve mentioned before the way that Kara treated her as Supergirl, especially in season 3. 

Now yes Kara has been lovely to Lena as Supergirl, the same as Lena has to her. they have actively saved each others arses on more than on occasion. 

BUT season 3 and 4 gave us a look at what Kara can be like when she feels her authority is being questioned. Kara was instantly p**sed at Lena for daring to keep Reign a secret, no regard for WHY just accusations. Honestly why Kara was there while they interrogated Lena is beyond me, she doesn't actually have a DEO rank? But whatever. She instantly got p**sed that Lena had some leftover kryptonite (we know she made it) and immediately took it as threat, even though Lena IS her best friend. What irked me the most about season 3 was that Kara didn't really give a lot of thought to Sam, in her beef with Lena it was always Kara, Kara, Kara. The fact that Lena did all of this FOR SAM to protect her went completely over Kara’s head. 

Kara also got p**sed that Lena dared to have tech that she didnt know of or approve of. Lena literally told Kara that the force field on Reign’s cell prevented Kryptonian’s looking through it, so what was the first thing Kara does? Why she tries to look through it and gets p*ssed that it caused a bit of pain. She instantly rounded on Lena and saw something SHE personally could nosy through as a threat. I mean Lena could literally just have used this so she wouldn't be spied on in the shower by passing Kryptonian’s. Just because Kara does have X Ray vision doesn't mean shes entitled to be able to see everythong (*cough* Batgirl *cough*) This scene was basically like telling someone not to put their hand in the fire because it will burn, only for them to instantly do it and then get upset with you for built the fire in the first place. 

I was beyond happy that Lena brought Kara down a peg or two, ive said it before but Kara is rarely seriously questioned by anyone and it seems to have gone to her head. Kara’s authority is mostly what shes bestowed on herself, much like Superman. 

But anyway, Kara seems to have realized she’s been a colossal ass and jumped to conclusions, because she has a really awkward exchange with Lena and says she hopes it wont ruin their friendship. See my issue here is that Kara thinks she can attack Lena but because she has had a change of heart its still all good? yeah... no. Lena tells her what for again, poor love tells her she has friends that trust her, not knowing the very woman she is referring to is the same woman shes talking to. 

Kara then gets pissed that Lena gives Kara whats ‘left’ of the kryptonite.  I mean you were upset she had it and now you’re upset shes giving it to you? Once again the fact that this could help her fight Reign and save Sam when she and the others have spectacularly failed goes over her head and she attacks Lena again, who quite rightly tells Kara that lots of things in the world could hurt her but she goes on with life and doesn't whine about. Kara seems to think that NOTHING on Earth should ever be allowed to exist that could hurt her or any other Kryptonian completely forgetting  recent Kryptonian attacks, one of which she did herself oh and the current one. This is pretty God like behavior. She also doesnt have issues with DEO having weapons that  can hurt other aliens, as long as it isn't her.  Kara even pulls the ‘Luthor’ card on Lena. Note through all this its always Kara who has the issue with Lena, Lena has no issues with Supergirl until she attacks her. 

Kara thinks she has the authority to tell Lena she isnt coming to the dark valley to try and save her friend Sam, i mean why is Kara calling the shots here? She does redeem herself a bit when she tells Reign to take her instead of Lena, but honestly? Kara would have done that for literally anyone, this isn't because its Lena. 

Lena even returns to the DEO the moment Kara is in danger of dying. Lena has pre-made suit that even has the House of El crest on it! 

Remember also, that even after the interrogation, Alex asked Lena to just tell her why she didnt let on about Sam and Alex was absolutely OK with Lena’s explanation and didnt harp on about it, this is Alex Danvers whose life is dedicated to protecting Kara’s. 

Kara then did the ONE thing that i thought was so below the belt. She meddled in Lena's relationship and put it at risk. She quite literally went to Lena's boyfriend, a man who not long ago wasn't going to give her the time of day and wanted her in prison no matter what and Lena had to learn to trust, and Kara asked him of all people to betray Lena’s trust. Kara could have asked any DEO agent, but no, apparently James, the one person she SHOULDNT have asked to betray Lena was the only one who would do it? Im sorry Kara you dont do that under any circumstances. Kara is dumb anyway because she trusts James! He literally breaks into L Corp, then he lies to Kara and then drops her in it with Lena? There was NO reason for him to do that, he just wanted the best of both worlds. 

Kara gets pissed that Lena dared to make Harun El for anyone other than the mighty Kryptonian’s that have decreed that this substance they dont understand, arent even close to understanding and has the power to keep civilizations alive is NOT allowed to be used for the benefit of humans, but a human is allowed to  make it for the benefit of Kryptonians and only kryptonians, Yeah, Argo would be a floating city of dead people if it wasn't for Lena managing to figure something out in about a week that the entire race of advanced scientists o Argo weren't even close to doing. The fact is Kara jumps down her throat again, but this time its Alex that comes to Lena’s defence. 

The problem when it comes down to it, is that Kara is too quick to assume the worst in Lena, when she used to be the exact opposite. This is shoddy writing and OOC but unfortunately its what happened. Kara thinks she has authority over all things and the fact is she just doesnt. 

Getting James to betray Lena was the worst one for me, and the one that warrants a smack or in this case a punch in the face. If my best friend asked my significant other to betray my trust because she decided she couldn't trust me oh and then acted like she had nothing to do with it while i vented i would think about punching her and if it was the other way round she would probably think the same, and she would justified because that isnt friendship. 

Kara was Jekell and Hyde with Lena, she even looked her nose down at her in season 2 when she and Superman landed on L Corp’s balcony to talk to Lena and Lillian, the look Kara gave Lena has stuck with me because it was so superior, like because she was now standing with Superman she had more authority? Was she trying to measure up? 

Then there’s the fact that Kara has no issue letting Lena think her ass is in danger, or letting her think shes been blown up! 

Kara knows the amount of betrayals Lena has faced, but she just kept on going  and it was wrong. If she had no intention of telling Lena and letting her be the only one in her new found family that apparently wasn't trusted enough then she should never have gotten so involved with Lena in the first place. 

Kara ignored Lena after Mon El left, then only came to her when she needed her help, essentially her money and her influence. Then once shed asked for it she fobbed off Lena’s attempt to reach out to her. Lena actually does use her power and her own money to save Cat Co and Kara is just  like ‘oh ok, but i quit’. It was using Lena and it was harsh, even if Kara did say she would go back. Then you have Kara’s blatant disregard for Lena as a boss. 

The fact is Kara picks and chooses her attitude to Lena, she should pick ONE not have multiple personalities, choosing to support her on minute, ignore her the next or accuse her of misdeeds in another. 

Now think about what Lena is thinking? Kara lied about who she is, Lena is going to know a Super came to investigate her the moment she arrived in National City, this same super integrated herself into Lena's life and they got close, but Lena is probably wondering why that was now? If Lena had befriended Kara knowing she is Supergirl you know it would have been instantly treated as suspicious. Kara treated her like she was bad even after Lena helped save her and the world several times. Kara used the relationships Lena built against her. Kara acted like she had dull authority over her, she let her think her life was in danger or she was dead more than once. Yeah id be pretty p**sed to.Lena may even wonder why Kara pushed her to date James of all people, someone who wasnt a fan of hers, but then suddenly was? Oh was that so he could stay close to Lena and be used against her? To spy o  her? Lena ‘s feeling arent something Kara can just play with depending on how the mood hits her, actions have consequences and treating people like this isnt cool.

Its a lot for Lena to process, and its not like she can ask kara about it, even when Kara knows Lena knows she cant trust the explanations Kara may give her. 

If Oliver punched Barry the fans would just be like ‘ahh man! They’ll make it up’ 

Batman and Superman fight, ‘ahh man! They’ll make up’. 

But Lena punches Kara? ‘Oh my God abuse!!’ 

i dont think Lena is punching Kara because of the secret itself, shes probably punching her because of all the s**t that came along with it. 

(if you dont agree fine, but dont send hate) 

[korranguyen]

Some thoughts on romance in TDP and ATLA: What Does Rayllum Get Right?

Okay, I know this post doesn’t do much service to this claim, but I don’t love the idea of directly comparing ships to one another. Every relationship is different in the context it takes place, and it’s just as unfair to directly compare any two relationships as it would be to compare two different couples in real life: every person, and by extension, every character, is unique in their own way. Not to mention I’m a bit hesitant to write this because TDP just found its footsteps away from ATLA with the new season, and I honestly fear plaguing the lovely positivity of the TDP fan base with old wounds from the ATLA ship wars.

BUT since there are already a lot of popular Kataang/Rayllum comparison posts floating around, I feel the need to share my two cents on the bit as someone who wholeheartedly enjoys the trajectory of Rayllum, but had my... reservations when it came to the canonized romance in ATLA.

Instead of dwelling on those reservations, though, I’m gonna focus on talking about and validating the parts of the ships we do like (meaning both Zutarians and Kataangers).

This essay, in a nutshell:

Two ships form an unlikely bond and find their peace in the midst of warring kingdoms fandoms. #amirite

What Rayllum Learns from Zutara

TBQH I surprised by how many embraced the Kataang/Rayllum parallels because the setup itself reminded me of Zutara— not Kataang. They share a similar origin story: Rayla threatens Callum in an attempt to pursue his little brother, just like how Zuko often pursued Katara to capture Aang. Their introductions are antagonistic, if not explicitly violent, but because the writers take the time to humanize both characters outside of these interactions, the audience understands that these conflicts happen because they’re driven by motivations from opposite sides of the war. Of course, when they are forced to become allies, it’s... not as smooth-sailing as you’d expect.

At its core, both Rayllum and Zutara are very cautious friendships. They don’t trust each other right away. It’s not perfect; they have their outbursts, reluctance to trust, and painful blows to their bond. But against all odds they eventually establish trust in each other. And because that trust isn’t just given, but needs earning, it takes its time dwelling on wounds necessary to transgress those lines and establishes extra depth in the meantime, making it well-earned and conducive to an understanding relationship. When they find their peace and friendship, it feels earned and respected on both sides, and both parties have a deeper understanding of each other than they could've had with a happy-go-lucky friendship.

Also, a side effect of the bitter work (sorry I had to lol) it took to to build that relationship, both Zutara and Rayllum have become especially in-tune with each other’s emotional cues. On the behalf of Zutara, there’s the moment when Katara comforts Zuko as he’s cowering in front of his uncle’s tent. She immediately recognizes that something’s wrong and approaches him about it:

Zuko opened up to Katara yet again about his insecurities and fears just like he did in Ba Sing Se. I love how easy it is for him. Zuko’s normally so guarded yet doesn’t mind being vulnerable with Katara. He’s so worried because he doesn’t see how Uncle Iroh can forgive him. It’s important that Katara’s the one encouraging him because she was also someone he betrayed that day. Someone who had faith in him to make the right choice, someone who changed for the better. She forgave him and she knows Iroh will too. That carries some weight with him. 

-- Geektastic08

Because of how many more opportunities Rayllum than Zutara to show off their perceptiveness of each others’ emotions, I could name off a lot of similar moments-- but I’m going to go with when Rayla slices open the mummy on the Cursed Caldera. When she returns and anxiously gets to ushering people forward, Callum notices almost instantly that Rayla’s acting off and expresses his concern. And, of course, Rayla opens up that she did, indeed, see something “horrible”— immediately opening up to him on the fact she was afraid, almost instinctively overcoming her reluctance to show her fears and weaknesses as established from previous episodes when Callum is the one who asks about it.

Also, this:

"I know that face. It’s your dumb idea face.” =)

Another reason: balanced-out co-parenting is a thing (Ezran vs. the rest of the Gaang).

On a more grand-scheme note, their relationship actually also shares a lot of the same “thematic importance” as Zutara as a symbol of overcoming differences and bonding. As cheesy as this line low-key is (IMO), Harrow says:

“I ask you and your brother to reject history as a narrative of strength and instead have faith that it can be a narrative of love.”

Yeah, read by the human boy crossing foreign lands with a she-elf to return the Dragon Prince to his mother as a gesture of bonding elves and humans and ending the war between nations. Having faith that history can be rewritten as a narrative of love and compassion.

To top it off, Rayllum owns it when it comes to living up to the not-overtly-kissy romantic foreshadowing of Zutara.

This is an allusion to the established Moon symbolism from earlier in the episode. As painful as it was, finding out about the king winds up illuminating, and eventually fulfilling, the possibility of deeper relationship and understanding of trust they originally couldn't see (but was still there) when Callum crosses the barrier into the “light face” from the “dark, shadowed side”. 

Also, this shipper’s haven scene:

Agh, yes.

What Rayllum learns from Kataang

Okay, so one of the bigger (and very understandable) issues with Zutara is that all of their development (aside from “Crossroads of Destiny”) happens very late in the last season. No matter how solid the moments we do get are, there simply isn’t enough time to fully wash away their damaged terms only a couple episodes prior, much less transgress necessary lines before a healthy relationship can occur. Whether or not their build-up does justice for their relationship arc as friends, by the end of ATLA, Zutara’s negative interactions still outnumber their positive ones by a sheer majority, so pushing that relationship into romance so soon comes with negative implications. (Which is where the Book 4 rumors seep in, but let’s not touch those today)(Anyway, even as a person who generally supports Zutara, I don’t advocate for that relationship to be “endgame”, or even as a part of canonized material because romance that soon after establishing that trust wouldn’t have conducive to a healthy relationship.)

On the other hand, Kataang gets a lot more credit in the time department. Because their friendship is established in such a positive light from the very first episode, Kataang has the benefit of faith from their countless endearing moments capturing a casual, comfortable friendship we can know and love, and then can grow nostalgic about over time. Even when their angrier moments play out, they usually fizzle out in the pool of happier memories they already have, so such instances are easily forgivable from the majority of the audience.

Now, despite initially being at odds with each other, Rayllum is established early enough to have the advantage of 5/6/7 seasons under its belt to build to that healthy relationship. Even in the less-immediate circumstances of their trust, the show still leaves plenty of time to fill with the necessary builds and prove their friendship through positive interactions. This is evidenced by the fact that by the end of Season 2, their negative interactions— even Rayla’s original position as Callum/Ezran’s killer— is water long down the bridge.

(Random tangent: To all who believe Zutara is an unforgivably abusive ship because of Katara’s and Zuko’s previous enemy relationship, let me pitch this to you: Rayla literally corners Callum and holds a blade in his face, about to kill him in the second episode yet Rayllum is very inarguably not abusive. The issue with Zutara isn’t that it’s inherently a sour relationship because they used to be enemies, it’s that there’s a dire lack of time to ease the ratio of interactions of Zuko hurting Katara to him helping her before the end of the show where starting that immediate relationship would have come with poor implications. In the case of Rayllum, Rayla actually gets a very extended chance to make that up in a larger span of time and exceeded those numbers two weeks ago long ago)

Thanks to all that screentime, maybe if our Season-2-Shipper-Scenes can be read as glimpses of a possible building crush early on like Kataang’s, that’ll stir up some of the heartstring garble later that it did with Kataang, too (for some, at least).

Rayllum’s interactions share the lovable silliness of Kataang. When it comes to picturing your ideal, sugarcane relationship, we will often find our soft spots in the couples who spend the most time smiling, laughing or being casually friendly with each other.

Also, here’s an interesting parallel: Katara was Aang’s primary support through his loss, just like Rayla was for Callum. Also, both Katara and Rayla struggled to hide the fact from their “romantic counterparts” at first, in fear of hurting newfound friendships with people they cared about, only to have this backfire later. However, I’d say it’s interesting to note that because Callum is almost 3 years older than Aang and thus arguably in a different phase of maturity (older childhood at 12 vs. teen at almost 15), the way they processed that realization took remarkably different forms between the two characters. Breaking the news to Callum meant surfacing more relationship-based questions about trust, meeting its resolution in a heart-to-heart conversation about honesty and hurting people you care about. On the other hand, because Aang is still, for most purposes, a child, that recognition on Aang’s part, as well as the honesty/lack of censorship on Katara’s part, doesn’t exist as much as an expectation in that relationship. Consequently, Aang’s grief process in “The Southern Air Temple” was wholly Aang-centric, coming to life in a display of rage and pain before he comes to accept his new position as the avatar and the last airbender in the arms of his new “family”. (I actually think the most obvious comparison to Aang here is Ezran, who became angry and ran away when he found out about his father’s death, then returned with a fuller understanding of the newfound individual responsibility he must face despite not being ready for as a growing kiddo. But that’s a discussion for another time; maybe I’ll write something on that later). 

Of course, the aforementioned covert foreshadowing of the Zutara ship comes coupled (pun intended) with the overt romantic foreshadowing of the Kataang ship! Because what kid (or kid in the heart) doesn’t let out the giddy squeals over that.

Also, it’s the male and female lead. Everyone’s gotta love those characters! Bet you money all the 2010s children who watch TDP are gonna get hella attached to that stuff and rack up the tears on how well-elaborated those characters were and how perfect they were for each other through thick-lens nostalgia goggles when they grow up. That’s just how dat shit works.

TL;DR If Zutara was too “dark” or “intriguing”, or “bound to make six year olds cry” (as Ehasz himself supposedly said in a class at UC Berkeley; lol), Rayllum re-illustrates that arc with the cushiness of a clear, lovable path and the positive-interaction-to-death-threat ratio, audience faith, (love for small critters,) and longer friendship screentime of Kataang.

Rayllum shares all of the literary nuances of Zutara and the sweet lovability of Kataang. And then adds its own little sparks of healthiness.

It’s a ship built for everyone to fall in love with.

I honestly don’t care whether this winds up being a very strong friendship or a romantic relationship (though I’m inclined to believe from the narrative that it’s the latter), but no matter the direction the show takes, I love their relationship so much and have full faith it’ll be done right.

Let me know if I missed anything else! I know I might be missing the narrative importance and/or parallels others might see in Kataang because I’m a bit biased to Zutara as the poster of this multi-ship analysis (though I tried my best to counteract it for objectivity), so especially if you’re a Kataanger, let me know what you’ve noticed and I’ll be happy to add it in.

positive/non-warring reax only please :)

[just-kessho]

Ambrosia: Dazai Happiness Week

[Day 3] Birthday party

AU: None

Warnings: Mentions of suicide (thanks, Dazai) and slight spoilers for those who haven’t finished season 1 and 2 of BSD I guess?

[Day 1] [Day 2] [Here] [Day 4] [Day 5] [Day 6] [Day 7]

It was unlikely for Dazai Osamu to not know things – escape routes and alleyways of Yokohama? Those he has already mapped out with every nook and crannies within his brain. A war against Port Mafia? Yes, he already have at least 84 plans and countless backup plans already stored in his mind.

A birthday party for him?

What?

Sure, Dazai knew of ‘birthday’ and ‘party’ as well as ‘birthday party’ but for that to happen to him, the few people who stared into the swirling abyss only for it to blink back, was completely out of his calculations.

All right, to be fair, his mind was already whirling with countless possibilities when Atsushi, all trembling and stuttering every other word, came up to him only to ask about, and he quote straight from the teen’s mouth, “all the best places for suicide” in all of Yokohama.

But Atsushi didn’t stop there – oh no, he followed up with a very high pitched and very loud (that Dazai had to refrain from covering his ears, though he clearly remembers his eyebrows twitching from that sudden outburst) shout of, “will you show them to me?!” that had ‘suspicious’ labelled all over him.

He was about to ask Atsushi what was wrong – and believe me, if [Name] was involved in anything, then he would drop everything and anything just to sprint to her side – but before a single word could get out of his throat, his blond co-worker screaming about everybody’s schedule being interrupted whenever Dazai’s present, and thus that leads to Dazai… well, basically granting Atushi’s wish by showing the male all the places that he would personally commit suicide.

Though just after the two stepped out of the agency front doors, the brunette turned back to face the brick red building, wondering what on Earth was happening to prevent him from merely being inside it – he figured that much out, for Kunikida, under no circumstances, would ever allow Dazai to step a single feet outside the building when it was working hours. It says something about his own disappearance skills (that he was somewhat proud of), and also more about how it was a poorly disguised way (to someone as perceptive as Dazai, of course) of not wanting a person named ‘Dazai Osamu’ to know about what everyone was planning.

He could rule out a war against Port Mafia, as the truce between the two organisations were still standing, and he could also rule out-

Wait, was [Name] truly in danger? Sure, he knew of the dangerous jobs that she sometimes would take without as much blinking an eye, yet the image of her laying on a hospital bed, where her red liquid of life would make a stark contrast against the pristine white of the sheets, and being strapped to every machine available just to barely keep her alive was not an image that he want – nor want to remember.

[Hair colour] framed her face like an antique piece of artwork, and those [eye colour] were shining with… something met his dull brown ones.

He blinked, and the- his belladonna was gone.

Whether the stunning beauty in that window was an illusion or not, perhaps it was time to focus on entertaining Atsushi with his hand-picked spots for suicide.

Yet two and a half hours into showing the white haired kid the suicide spots with as much enthusiasm as possible so he wouldn’t know Dazai knew the agency (and perhaps along with [Name]’s workplace named with the very original name of ‘The Office’) was planning something.

Though Dazai thought [Name] had a neutral look of looking as if she was absolutely bored of everything, as if she had somehow experienced everything before and was doing them again, like a countless playthrough of a game that mirrored your first one, Atsushi’s face now sort of… resembled that of his girlfriend’s.

… Perhaps the white haired male really had enough listening about “ooh, that branch seemed to support your weight well” and “there’s not many people who would come here, so this is the perfect spot for a clean suicide~” and whatnot.

Honestly, he seemed more like their newest addition in the agency, Izumi Kyouka, when she was waiting personally for him in the shopping district than the sunny boy who always smiled, asking if there was anything he could do to help and putting his life on the line for others.

“Atsushi-kun.” stopping so suddenly, much like them times when Dazai himself slammed on the brakes, at the last minute, when he was driving, so it was no surprise that Atsushi nearly bumped into him. Nearly. “what is with you and the agency today?”

“I… do not get what you mean, Dazai-san?” really, the kid was so bad at lying that Dazai swear he could personally count every sweatdrop that was staring to show on his forehead. “Wh-whatever could you have gotten that from, I won-wonder?”

“… Your whole attitude.”

Really, Dazai might have wanted to re-think his earlier statement, since as soon as that ruthless three worded sentence was uttered, Atsushi looked as if someone had snatched his beloved chazuke and threw it in the bin all right in front of him.

“W-well, it is a special day, so the agency thought that… you should have a break today!”

“… oh shit, is today the anniversary of me and [Name]?”

“No! At least, I don’t think so.” to see Dazai panicking was a sight to behold, but it was slightly sad for the birthday boy not realise what today really is.

“I-is it [Name]’s birthday?”

“… No.”

“Versalius-san’s birthday?”

“… Think again, Dazai-san.”

“The Office’s founding date? The agency’s founding date?”

“Keep thinking, Dazai-san.”

“Was today the day [Name]’s favourite pet died, and so she wants us out of the picture so she can mourn in peace, yet deep down inside, all she really wanted was for me to lend her a shoulder to cry on and have comfort sex?”

“What?! NO!”

Face red and huffing as if he had just sprinted across three hundred meters for the last bowl of chazuke, Atsushi hunched down and mumbled something about Dazai being so sad and oblivious, yet he wondered whether the older man was really just entertaining him.

Yet at the thoughtful look spread across Dazai’s face as he really whacked his brain, Atsushi threw that last thought out of his mind.

Oh wait, Dazai was known for being good actor, so maybe that deduction wasn’t that far off.

Perhaps I should just tell him outright- wait, what were you thinking, Nakajima Atsushi?! [Surname]-san’s trust was specifically put into you! So don’t fail her – and the entire agency – now.

A phone beeped. And at the vibration felt in the pocket, Atsushi immediately scrambled to get it out, nearing dropping the object in his haste. And at the neat kanji and katakana that told him everything was ready, he felt himself relieve a breath that he didn’t know he was holding.

Thank God, because I don’t think I can fool or keep Dazai-san from the truth anymore.

“Dazai-san, I think we should return to the agency because… uh, oh, because Kunikida-san just texted me saying that we need you.”

“Eh-? No, don’t wanna, and here I was having such a good time showing you all my favourite suicide spots-”

“Actually, it was [Surname]-san who needs you, she just didn’t want to… she didn’t want me to tell you that.”

“Then let’s go! That sounds exactly like [Name]-chan~”

I offer you my sincerest apologies, [Surname]-san, but your sacrifice is much needed – just please find it in your heart to forgive me!

“Atsushi-kun, why are you praying to a God now?”

Atsushi didn’t really have a convincing answer for that impossible question. So he stayed silent, praying for Dazai to not work out what they have in store for him.

A thunderous bang resonated throughout the room. Confetti was thrown, and a particular long one got entangled in Dazai’s hair.

Atsushi’s frantic stuttering and sweatdrop now made sense. They were preparing a birthday party for him!

Oh wait, today really was his birthday, wasn’t it?

But he paid neither the confetti nor the sudden realisation that he was a year older any notice.

Oh no, not with his co-works (that were crawling slowly but surely, to the place in his heart where the walls that he carefully put up were defeated – much like what [Name] did) smiling – yes, even Kyouka, and the corners of Kunikida’s mouth twitched upwards – and simultaneously shouting “happy birthday, Dazai!” along with the colourful banners and freshly prepared food that was put out for everyone to enjoy.

… He just hoped Vesalius did not prepare them…

But still, that cake, that magnificent cake that was coated in his favourite flavour – a sure sign that it was [Name] who ordered it, heck, perhaps she even made it herself. Oh wait, it wasn’t covered in crabsticks so that was out of the window.

However, the disappointment that reminded him of a child not getting his way in a toy shop was quickly washed away by a warm feeling as he scanned each happy faces of his co-workers that he couldn’t help but feel his lips spread into a smile-

And then his eyes met hers.

Did time slow down? Probably not, but he really felt it was just him and her in this room. A dazzling smile that he wanted to protect (despite fully knowing she was perhaps even more capable of that than him), a dazzling smile that was not present not even two years prior… a smile that was directed solely at him. He remembers simply expressing his gratitude to the people in front of him, and then making his way towards the [hair colour] haired woman.

Her hands were clasped behind her back, was she trying to look cool by hiding her fiddling fingers? How utterly cute.

(It wasn’t the first time such a thought cropped up in Dazai’s mind, and it for sure wasn’t the last)

“… Happy birthday, Dazai.”

“Really, [Name]-chan, you didn’t have to do all this!”

“But I wanted to, we wanted to. You deserve a break after all… so here.”

A package of blue and red was thrust in his vision of sight. With hands that trembled slightly – huh, why was he trembling anyway? Years of torturing and other jobs in the mafia without batting an eyelash hardened him so. Thus this small, trivial exchange should not… should not make him feel as if he was on top of the world, and wouldn’t mind having this warmth blossoming in his chest longer.

Still, he took it. Gently unwrapping the thing, a burst of blue greeted his eyes.

“It’s a labradorite.” [Name] explained, leading him right under one of the agency’s artificial lights. “it changes colour depending on the light. Normally this gemstone I got you stays a blue-ish colour, but it can become red, yellow, hmm… a blue-green and gold. Ah, see that? It just changed to gold for a moment- and now it’s a sort of blue-green. Oh, it changed back to being solely blue.”

Turning the precious stone so that it shined in all the colours that it can give off, the birthday brunette entertained himself with it – heck, Dazai even managed to get [Name]’s eye colour to stay on for an extended period of time, but it is fickle, one slight shake of his hand and the colour vanished.

“Thank you, [Name]. I’ll take good care of it.” it wasn’t a lie, nor a white-lie that was the result of his silver-tongue that made many people spill out their deepest secrets or flush in a deepest red. No, it was right from his heart – and that was something that made [name]’s smile widen.

Which in turn, made his own widen, for the warmth in his chest, spreading down to his fingertips and toes, made him forget of his past and the demons that plagued his mind – just for today, just for this hour… just as long as [Name]’s genuine smile was there, on her face.

Huh, and he thought it was impossible to fall more in love with her.

The presents he received were more everyday essentials, though there were some books from the Director and Vesalius (with the latter glaring at him for seeing him kiss his lovely niece) that he wanted to flip through.

Still, the gift that made an everlasting impression – almost as much as [Name]’s gemstone – was Naomi and Tanizaki’s.

It was a maid dress.

Not one that showed off everything and hid nothing, not it was one that was historically correct with the skirt down to the floor. It was one that showed off all the right curves of [Na- uh, whoever that would put it on. It was a miniskirt, yes, but it could pass for a school uniform miniskirt, and the collar was also down, though it didn’t show off everything and so left just enough room for imagination…

All in all, Dazai thought he had to give it to Naomi (this had the younger Tanizaki sibling written all over it) for her to pick out this particular and… uh, unique gift.

… And she was smirking slyly all the while he opened it.

Hey, guess he and [Name] would get busy tonight, as he would definitely abuse his ‘birthday boy’ status.

    Omake

“[Name]-chan, put it on, pleaseeeeeee!”

“No.”

“Come on, I’m begging you- and I’m the birthday boy here. Also, everybody want to see you in this, after all, who wouldn’t want our poster girl in a cute maid dress?”

“Y-yeah…” I-I’m so sorry, [Surname]-san!

“Oooooh, definitely! It would be a sight to behold.”

“I’m sure it would suit you. I know it would have more impact than the time I dressed up.”

“See, even Kyouka-chan and Naomi-chan said it. So please!”

“……………… Ugh… fine. Give it here then.”

“If you don’t I’ll make my infamous puppy- wait, what?”

“I won’t say it twice.”

“Yes!”

“I’ll get the camera ready!”

“You won’t old man.”

“D-damn… she’s so cruel to me…”

“Come on people, drum roll please! Aaaaaaand here we go!

“No! No drum rolls Naomi. Also……… Kill me. Right now- hey, D-Dazai, why are you picking me up?! And where are we going?”

“Kunikida-kun, don’t look for us for the next three days bye!”

Guess who’s a day late! Happy birthday husbando, the light of my life, my reason for living, the one whom I just reblogged 100+ gifs and photos of…

@dazaixhappinessweek2k19

[ink-flavored]

11/11/11 Tag Game (Triple Threat)

I was tagged by @bookenders @timetravelingpigeon and @oradall! Thank you!

Questions

What animal would be your familiar?

You can bring any one extinct species back, with the guarantee that it won’t become extinct again. Which animal do you bring back?

Top three favorite animals?

What’s your favorite road trip snack?

What’s one place you never want to visit?

If you had to live in the world of (one of) your WIP(s), how screwed would you be?

What’s the worst name for a character you’ve ever had?

What’s something your 8-year-old self would love about you? 

What’s the stupidest thing your OC(s) has ever done?

How important is family to your OC(s)? To you?

What’s the song you want playing in the background every time you walk into a room?

Tagging: @rainy-rose​ @rrrawrf-writes​ @aslanwrites​ @tenacious-scripturient​ @waterfallwritings​ @quilloftheclouds​ @blueinkblot​ @lilquill​ @kobalt-ink​ and anyone else who feels like it!

My 33 answers below!

1.      What baseball positions would your OCs be in if they all had to be on a baseball team? What’s the team name? What’s their mascot? What do the uniforms look like? (If you hate baseball or prefer a different sport, substitute said sport for baseball.)

Well, considering Park is literally on a baseball team, I think I’ll answer this one for him. He’s a pitcher for the North Carolina Sabretooth Cats, and if you can’t tell their mascot from that, then I don’t know what to tell you. Their uniform colors are white, gold, and black.

2.      How good are your OCs at bowling? How good are you at bowling?

I, personally, suck at bowling. I’ve never been good at it, but I still have fun!

Before Hayden was on crutches, he was the bowling master. It’s harder for him to bowl now that he can’t really balance by himself, or hold a ball at the same time as he holds his crutches.

Park is also really great at bowling, something that Jamie (bad at bowling) will never forgive him for.

If bowling existed for Teconia, she would try her best, but not succeed. Xinya would be almost good. The occasional strike. Yu-Qi would attempt to chuck the bowling ball like a softball because it Made Her Lose.

3.      Rewrite this in your style: “I picked up the book and read the back. He took it from me before I could protest. He never lets me have the cool stuff.

I took the book of the shelf and flipped it over to read the back, but I couldn’t get a single word in before he snatched it out of my hands. I pouted – he never lets me have the cool stuff.

4.      What do you love about the last book you read?

The last book I read is called Policing the Black Man, a collection of essays edited by Angela J. Davis. I’m telling you this because you should read it. It’s not an easy read, and I’ve had to take several breaks from it because it’s very heavy, but it’s an eye-opening look at how race and law enforcement interact in America. It reinforced a lot of the things I already knew (the police are an institution founded on racism), but it’s teaching me so much more about why that is, and how we can fix it in the future. Highly recommended – especially if you’re white.

5.      What are three things you love about your writing?

I really love my descriptions, character interactions, and settings.

6.      What’s a word you love the sound of? What’s a word you really don’t like the sound of?

I have an entire list of words that I love, but I’ll pick my top three: Vivaciousness, Gossamer, and Facetious.

My least favorite word is flesh. I hate that word so much.

7.  ��   How do you like to begin your stories?

It depends on the story. Usually I like to jump into the action, to give the reader something to latch onto as soon as possible, and to get them to form questions at the same time.

8.      What other forms of writing have you tried other than the one you’re working with now? (i.e. playwriting, screenwriting, poetry, interactive, novels, short fiction. etc.) How do you feel about them?

I’ve been writing a game! It’s been a super huge blast, and even though I know neither jack nor shit about coding, the program I’m using makes it very easy to write games without any coding. Use Twine! It’s the best!

Once I graduate (in June!!), I want to finish the game and upload it somewhere so I can get people playing it. Stay tuned for that!

9.      What’s your favorite play/musical? Why? What’s your favorite part?

OH NO, I HAVE TO PICK ONE? Okay fine, it’s Chicago. I absolutely adore that musical, mostly because I love jazz. But also because the dark humor, satire, and well-rounded and unique women are top notch. I had the privilege of seeing it on Broadway in 2017, and I cannot recommend it enough.

10.  What kind of stories do you like to read? How different are they from what you write?

Honestly, not much different at all. I read a lot of fantasy, sci-fi, and poetry – I write a lot of fantasy, sci-fi, and poetry. The only thing I write, but don’t read, is suspense/horror-ish stuff. Which sounds weird, but I listen to Welcome to Night Vale, which is about as much horror as I can handle.

11.  What’s your favorite bit of worldbuilding from a story someone else wrote?

I’m a huge Tolkien nerd, and the whole concept of two trees that give light to the whole world is the best idea.

12.  If you had to change the genre of your WIP, what would you change it to?

Oh man, this is a tough one. I think the easiest one would be changing Firesoul from fantasy to steampunk-fantasy, a la Perdido Street Station by China Miéville, but I’m not sure if that counts. The idea of an urban fantasy God-Dragon’s Wife is interesting, too.

13.  What’s your favorite writing POV? First person? Third person limited? One or multiple POV’s?

I prefer Third Person Omniscient or Third Person Limited, but I will (very rarely) write in First Person, and even a little Second Person.

14.  Have you thought of a title for your WIP? How did you pick it?

All my WIPs have titles, but the one that was hardest was Out of the Park, because it’s way too cliché and I only picked it because I needed something to call the project.

15.  How easy is it for you to come up with outfits for your OCs?

Depends on the character. Xinya is the hardest, because all of her outfits have to be super elaborate and have to fit in with her culture, but Hayden? Jeans and a t-shirt. Easy.

16.  Who is the oldest OC in your WIP? (Either in-universe or when you made them.)

In-universe, Xinya is the oldest human at thirty-three. Yu-Qi easily surpasses that by like ten thousand years, but she’s an eternal dragon deity, so.

In real life, Teconia is the oldest. Believe it or not, I made her for my first D&D campaign, and then decided I liked her so much I would make a whole story about her.

17.  Have you ever written fanfiction (even if it wasn’t posted online?)

Yes! I write a lot of fan fiction, and though most of it hasn’t left my flash drive, I have an AO3 account, with a couple of works-in-progress. Come say hello!

18.  What are your OC’s favorite colors? (List as many or as few as you want)

Teconia: bright orange, green, red

Xinya: dark blue, silver, light pink

Hayden: purple, yellow, lime green

Park: grass green, rusty red-brown, gold

19.  What is the most significant/important/often-appearing object in your WIP? Or, what is one object that one of your OCs cherishes?

D…dragons. In almost all of them, it’s dragons. Can you tell that I like dragons?

20.  What’s that one word that you can never seem to spell correctly?

This isn’t really a spelling thing, but I will never ever remember the difference between affect and effect. I’ve had it explained to me countless times, but I will never get it. I’ll be confused for the rest of my life.

21.  Which arc do you like better/think is more interesting: a hero who starts slowly slipping into evil, or a villain who decides to try to be good?

I think both have their perks, but the villain that tries to do good has a special place in my heart because it shows that people can change, which is a dose of positivity that I think we all need right now.

22.  Do you have any minor characters that are trying very, very hard to become one of the mains?

You know, I thought Yu-Qi would be happy staying the love interest. But now she wants to be a co-protagonist with Xinya. That’s what I get for making her literally a god.

23.  Weirdest thing you’ve been inspired by?

I read a fan fiction once, and I thought, “Psh. I could write that better.”

And now I have The God-Dragon’s Wife.

24.  Which character is closest to a self-insert?

In a way, all of my characters have some aspect of me in them, or some kind of trait I wish I had. Teconia has my kindness – the kindness that’s probably too nice. Park has the confidence I wish I had a lot of the time, but also the fear that I’ll never be good enough. I gave Hayden my anxiety (sorry), but also the determination to push through it that I need. Xinya is pleasant in polite company, but behind closed doors she’s a very angry character, which is something that I’ve been dealing with lately.

I guess I just don’t like the term “self-insert,” because all of my characters are me as much as they’re their own characters. They can be both.  

25.  Favorite season?

I’m assuming you mean my favorite season. It’s summer.

26.  Do you eat appetizers when you go out to eat?

Short answer: Yes

Long answer: If they serve mozzarella sticks, you bet your ass I will eat every single one of those fuckers unless someone holds me back. Also, if you try and separate me from gyoza, you will have your arms separated from your body.

27.  What is something you’re scared to write about?

Romance. I don’t know why, but I always feel like it comes off very stiff and impersonal when I write it, so I’ve been avoiding it for a long time.

28.  Favorite fantasy book series? (I need recommendations ;))

The. Inheritance. Cycle. Ho-lee shit, I have been talking about this series since I was in first grade, and I will never shut up. The first book is Eragon by Christopher Paolini. If you read it (or if anyone reading this has read it before) feel free to drop in and scream at me. I’m always ready.

29.  The most you’ve ever written at one time?

I don’t remember, actually! I think it might have been… when I wrote 8k words in a day?

30.  When do you like to write?

Whenever I can, but mostly at night. Which is not doing my sleeping schedule any favors, I’ll tell you that.

31.  Why is coming up with questions the most difficult part?

Good question. I have no idea.

32.  Which character would cry over a marvel movie?

Teconia, for sure.

33.  First character you created. Why?

My first character was a girl who had the werewolf-esque ability to turn into a dragon. She was pretty much my ideal self.

[whateverisbeautiful]

Reveling in Richonne

#108: The Best Friend (8x09)

Y’all...

I have to collect myself lol, because this moment right here was my absolute favorite.

Before the relationship between Rick and Michonne captured my heart, there was another bond that I adored right from the jump. And that’s the precious friendship between Carl and Michonne.

And for Carl and Michonne to have this whole personal moment for themselves in his final episode is every last thing. And it sounds like we owe a lot of that to Danai after seeing this...

She is a wise woman, y’all.👏🏽👏🏽👏

So when we cut back it’s officially just Rick, Michonne, and Carl in the tunnel. And I’m glad they gave the three of them the rest of this episode to have just with each other, as Rick and Michonne are the two who were closest to and who invested the most in Carl.

Plus focusing on these three over the years have given us some of the best episodes and scenes of the entire series, so they deserved to have these final moments together.

We see R&M taking care of Carl and being the loving parents they’ve always been to him. It’s clear they want this whole experience to be as comfortable for Carl as possible.

It’s cool cuz in season 3, Carl told Rick that Michonne could be one of them and here in this tunnel it’s just crystal clear how true that is cuz there’s no doubt that the three of them (+ Judith) are the Grimes family. 😊

Michonne notices Carl looking up at her, which I notice he does a lot in this episode. I appreciate that cuz you can tell he finds comfort in having Michonne right there with him.

She asks him if he’s okay and he tells her, “I don’t want you to be sad after this.” It’s heartbreaking to see how aware Carl is of his passing and the impact it’ll have on his family. And it’s hard hearing him address the fact that there’s going to be an “after this” without him.

Michonne responds saying Carl’s name in a way that implies she doesn’t want Carl to have to worry about her right now, and yet Michonne and Rick and how they move forward are the main things on Carl’s mind, which I love cuz his sole concern is for others at the end of his life.

He goes on to say, “Or angry. You’re gonna have to be strong for my dad. For Judith.”

First of all; 😭😭  Michonne is the matriarch and Carl knows it, y’all. 😌

(Side note: I notice how there oddly tends to be an erasure of Michonne in most audience discussions of this show. Like some really just completely overlook her character or only see and admire her as the marketable sword-wielding warrior which is so strange to me because she has a much larger role than that. (Although I low key have a feeling I know exactly why the dismissal of this character happens)

But, again not even from a Michonne fan perspective, but just in a general and contextual sense, Michonne is literally the character who’s closest to both the protagonist and his son, (even before Richonne became a thing). And yet she’s not always seen or talked about that way.

But what I love is that even if others don’t see her immense importance beyond “cool warrior woman”, Rick and Carl sure do.

And they express the closeness in which they see and value her often. It’s lines like this one from Carl, that really showcase how much he sees Michonne’s significance and influence on his whole family and how, to them, she is absolutely an instrumental part of their family unit.)

Carl has seen firsthand how his dad can get when a super personal loss occurs and I’m sure he knows if there’s one person who can get him through it’s Michonne. 😊

Of course it’s important that the show not forget that Michonne could need someone to be strong for her too and acknowledge that she’s going to be in the type of pain where she also will need a shoulder to lean on, but that being said, I really do appreciate Carl’s awareness of how much Rick is going to need her.

Again, this is Carl emphasizing both the mother/daughter relationship Michonne has developed with Judith as well as how much he understands it’s crucial for Rick and Michonne to go through this together and stick together after this.

To sum it up, I really appreciate that Carl’s aware of what an important role Michonne has in their lives and will continue to have in his dad and sister’s life.

He also says, “And for yourself.” I love that he includes that last part because it’s Carl acknowledging that he understands it’s not just Rick and Judith who will be affected after this, Michonne will be too.

And since season three Carl has had countless times to see the strength and resilience Michonne has, and so I think that’s why he really wants to stress this with her cuz he knows that she’s the one most capable of rising above the pain to keep fighting for this family and holding them together. It’s deep to see Carl entrust this to Michonne.

And another reason this moment is super deep is because when Lori died she expressed a similar wish for Carl to look after Rick and Judith.

And now Carl is passing that same wish on to Michonne because he sees her as family and as key to their family making it through. 👌🏽

Michonne looks over at Rick and seeing Rick look directly at Michonne you can see how much Rick co-signs Carl’s words. Like again, you just see how human Rick is and how much he too is aware of his need for her.

I love that Rick’s already looking at her when she looks over to him. This has to be pretty moving for Rick to watch on as his son expresses how important Michonne is to him and his family, and it just reiterates why Rick’s got the best one, y’all.

And in this whole exchange it’s like Rick is the third wheel almost, but that’s nothing new. 😋 I think it’s a happy norm for him at this point.

So then she looks back at Carl and says with conviction “I will.”

I love that she gives him that promise that she will continue to be a rock for their family. And I also am glad that Michonne receives this verbal confirmation of her influence and value in this family.

Carl then tells her, “Don’t carry this. Not this part.”

And y’all this feels so significant cuz just like he’s seen Michonne’s strength and resilience, he was also one of the first to really get to see her humanity and vulnerability.

And I appreciate this line cuz I feel like it’s him acknowledging one of the more personal moments Carl and Michonne shared which is in the season 4 finale when she told him about the way she became after losing Andre.

She carried that guilt over losing her first son and allowed it to make her shut down. So Carl is thinking of her and her well-being and letting her know he doesn’t want her to feel guilty about this.

It illustrates how well he’s come to know her but even more so it shows that he knows that their relationship has become so close that she could have a similar reaction to the way she became over Andre. They’re a mom and son, y’all.

But they’re also something else, which gets preciously confirmed in this next part. 🙌🏾

Cuz next, Carl smiles as he looks at Michonne, and I feel like in that moment you can just see every happy memory he’s had with her flash through his mind.

I feel like that’s why he had said “not this part” cuz there’s so many good memories between them to hold on to. But as he smiles you also see him be emotional cuz he’s aware that he’s about to be separated from the person he became closest to in this apocalypse.

So he warms my heart and breaks it too when he tells her with such sincerity “You’re my best friend, Michonne.” 😭🙌🏾😭🙌🏾😭

Y’all can I break down all the reasons I adore this? There’s a lot of reasons lol.

One; Like many of you, I had been saying for the longest that Carl and Michonne have the best friendship on this show. So to see them verbally acknowledge that they became best friends is awesome. 👏🏽👏🏽

It is such a fitting thing for him to say because, when you think about all the precious moments Carl and Michonne have had, we really did get to watch their journey of becoming best friends.

Two; I love that Carl got to tell her this in person, because I’d bet money that he told her in his letter to her but knowing he got to look at her and let her know with so much sincerity that she’s so special to him and his closest friend is wonderful. 😊

Three; Again, like many of you, I had hopes before this episode that Carl would address the way in which Michonne became a mom to him. And, don’t get me wrong, I def would’ve loved that and just been over the moon about it...But I honestly feel like Carl telling Michonne she’s his best friend is even better because a best friend is like the family that you choose. 👌🏽

And Carl is a teen and, at that age especially, the best friend role is pretty coveted. Like for most, that role isn’t taken lightly. So for him to feel as though his relationship with Michonne wasn’t just that of a maternal figure or older authority figure, but one of his best friend is deep. Carl and Michonne absolutely developed a mom and son dynamic, but what made their bond so special is that they were best friends too.

Four; It could have been easy for Michonne and Carl’s relationship to change when Michonne’s romantic relationship with Rick became official. And yet, clearly Carl still felt like he never lost his best friend in all this, if anything Carl was all for R&M’s union lol, which I appreciate.

Five; Another huge reason why I love this is because it took me right back to that moment between Rick and Michonne in season 4. It’s the moment where Rick and Michonne are in the kitchen after Rick hears how happy Carl is since Michonne reunited with them.

And Rick tells Michonne “I can’t be his father and his best friend. He needs you.”

And y’all, four seasons later here Carl is acknowledging how Michonne truly stepped up to the plate and became Carl’s best friend. 😭

Six; Them having this exchange, and just how sincere and heartfelt it was, really made me reflect on how much Carl and Michonne brought out the best in each other and how they gave each other joy in a world where that was supposed to be impossible.

Michonne didn’t treat Carl like he was just some kid, and Carl began to treat Michonne like she was more than just a lone wolf fighter. They saw each other for more than the surface and like Michonne said in season 4 they brought each other back. It doesn’t get more best friends than that.

And then Michonne’s initial reaction to hearing Carl say this, is so heartbreakingly beautiful.

After Carl lets Michonne know she’s his best friend, you can tell that means the world to Michonne. It’s emotional as she smiles and tells him “You’re mine too.” Perfection. 😊

And then what I really love is she says, “You’re mine” a second time and that second reiteration feels even deeper than just repeating he’s her best friend.

That second “You’re mine” completely felt like her telling him she’s embraced him as her own child. He’s her son. He’s hers. It’s everything. 😭

And then she kisses his hand and I adore the closeness as well as the lightheartedness of this. It totally encapsulates their relationship.

This whole best friends scene was the moment that got me, y’all. Like everything prior was making me internally emotional but when they said those lines, that just opened the floodgates and I was legit like...

They completely hit my heart with this scene and I’m not even mad at it tho, because Carl and Michonne deserved a beautiful and heartfelt moment like this even if it broke me to know it would all be coming to an end.

So then the remaining light in the sewer goes off and Rick reaches for Michonne and I love that, even in a wordless gesture like that, they’re still able to display the loving relationship they have.

He tells her, “I need your help.” Which will always and forever be the gospel truth. Here for it lol.

Michonne asks with what and Rick says “Getting him out of here” which I’m glad they were going to move him so Carl wouldn’t have to spend his last moments in a sewer.

It’s fitting for Rick to ask Michonne for help in regards to wanting something better for Carl, cuz that’s how it’s been for the longest. And she nods, agreeing that it’s important Carl spend his last moments somewhere else. 👌🏽😌

This show has always been at it’s best when it focuses on the relationships, and as much as we see the characters grow as survivors and fighters, it’s great when we see them also grow as people and friends.

Carl and Michonne went from being two strangers who met at a really low point in both their lives. Carl just lost his mom and his dad was losing it, and Michonne lost her family and then was let down by Andrea, her one friend, in Woodbury.

But in finding each other, Carl and Michonne really did find themselves and it was great to watch their friendship start as this little seed and then really grow and blossom into such an authentic friendship.

I’m glad that the bond they formed was really emphasized in this epiosde because, in my eyes, Carl and Michonne truly did have the best friendship in the series. ☺️👌🏽

[ae0nx]

FRUITS BASKET EPISODE 25!!!

Wow. We finally made it to the end of the 1st season! And we’re still alive and maybe just a little bit dehydrated from all the tears that have been spilled (stay hydrated, guys). Phew. It’s been an experience.

I know I said I was gonna write a review/recap on some other points of the 2001 True Form Arc but honestly... I’m tired lol And I can forgive and even like a lot of what the 2001 anime did, but the last few minutes after the climax of the True Form arc piss me off the more I think about it so I’m just gonna leave that job for future me who might come home drunk from a party and suddenly decide to ramble about it. Like God intended. 

- (Ok, this is the last last 2001 comparison I’ll make... until my next one), but I do kinda like that 2001 took the initiative to put Kyo’s backstory with his mother together with Kyo’s backstory with Kazuma as a side by side comparison... But, I guess it kinda shifted the whole point of the True Form arc to be about that rather than it being centred on Kyo and Tohru. Still an interesting choice!

One of my favouriteeee flashback moments! It’s so gentle! And baby Kyo is so adorable!

Kyo fighting in the stereotypical shonen anime way of fighting is just everything I needed to confirm to me that he truly thinks he’s in a shonen. Thank you, anime.

Ugghhhhh. Everything about the concept and the act of the ‘Cat’s room/prison’ is just... ugh. It’s probably the most disgusted feeling I get from this anime. I’m not criticising the writing at all, it rises the stakes and gives the protagonist something terrible to fight against. It’s just the whole thought around a ‘so called’ family or clan creating something like this for someone who did nothing but be born just makes me feel a bit ill.

(Lol and clearly Kazuma shares my thoughts!)

But this scene portrays one of my favourite things about Kazuma. Kazuma is a character that writers could very easily portray as perfect and without fault as he is literally and figuratively the teacher and one of the few adult guiding lights of the story. But Takaya-sensei gave him not only opportunity for fault but also opportunity for growth. Not once but TWICE. I love love the fact that while he adopted Kyo mostly out of guilt and atonement for how he’d treated his grandfather, it later turned into a genuine love and want for Kyo’s happiness. 

And I LOVE the fact that he feels bad for taking off Kyo’s beads. But real talk? What he did was a total Dad move. And whether you see it as a good thing or a bad thing, sometimes parents are cruel and tough to be kind and helpful and when you link it to the typical behaviour of a dojo master - it’s definitely in character. I just really like that he at least had some reservations about his actions as it fleshes him out more as a character! It’s all great. I love him haha

Tohru calls Kazuma, ‘Master Kazuma’!! 🤗

See! Even Tohru agrees with me! Total Dad.

I... <3

*clutches heart*   Sunshine boy...

That slight Studio Ghibli hair poof... I cannttttt

She’s just so happy for them!

AND I’M SO HAPPY FOR THEM! 😭It’s just a really cool and nice moment. Like a reassuring, ‘yeah, we had this huge moment that’s gonna be a drastic shift in our relationship but we’re cool’ :) while heart-eyeing each other on the inside

But I appreciate that we had a few seconds of this - that I personally felt the manga was missing. Kyo hurt Tohru and we’re not gonna talk about it until later-later? This was a good fix to at least show that it’s a thought in his head. Obviously, it will be fleshed out later along with all the other stuff in Kyo’s big ‘Tohru angst’ bin later... can’t wait to deep dive into that in season 2 ahaaaa...

TOHRU OPENLY SWOONING OVER KYO. TOHRU. OPENLY. SWOONING. OVER. KYO. 

A year can’t prepare me for season 2. I’ll never be ready.

- I can’t ever get enough of the cat reows in the background of Kyo’s anger outbursts

Oh, look it’s my favourite crackship. 🥰

Yuki’s reaction to everything is really interesting... and quite honestly, I’m still working it out in my head from forgotten pages of the manga. Because yes, Yuki’s reaction to the true form is very much in line with all of the other zodiac’s reactions. But the fact that he links Kyo’s true form to his darker thoughts and less graceful and non-perfected parts of himself as things that he needs to never reveal is... intriguing. The more Yuki starts to accept all of his trauma and the sides he doesn’t like about himself, I do wonder if it will also have an effect on the way he sees Kyo outside of the zodiac curse. 

Also sidenote: I always had the impression that the only reason Yuki hates Kyo so much is because Kyo pretty much openly DETESTED Yuki from the first moment they met because of the stories Kyo was told about the cat and rat relationship... but... I clearly have a lot to refresh my memory about the manga during the break because it seems like there’s a lot more to it than just that?

- I love Hatsuharu and Yuki’s relationship! Another lovely crackship. Haru is just so shippable.

A gorgeous moment. I love Tohru’s simple ‘okay’. THE WORLD’S BEST FRIEND.

I love that the animation studio is just like ‘yeah this ship is still valid, keep the triangle alive’ 😂I kid, this was super cute! But, I think it’s very clear when you compare Kyo/Tohru interactions to Kyo/Yuki interactions that you get what the jig is. But I’m not here to judge, have fun with whatever ship you like - happy sailing!

🎵WHOOO ARE YOU?

🎵WHO-WHO? WHO-WHO? 

(Of course I know, I’m not that much of an amnesiac...) Him calling Yuki cute/pretty is the birth of a new ship for me and I didn’t think she would have the same colour hair as Yuki (kinda)!

tch... biiiiiiiiiiiiiitttch.... 👀....

Oh giiiiirrrlllllll....

*sigh* I’m just glad that I get a year to revitalise myself cos Season 2 is gonna be MESSY.

But I guess that’s it for now!

This was a hell of a ride, guys. I hope you enjoyed my silly ranting for the time being. I dunno, if I’ll do the same for season 2 cos life happens (I most likely will, let’s get real) but doing this actually made me appreciate Fruits Basket on a whole new level and not just something nostalgic from my teen years.

My posting on Fruits Basket will probably die down a bit during the break cos I’ll be too busy crying about the next few arcs in My Hero Academia Season 4 instead and captivated by ‘Radiant’ (a new shonen anime that I think more people should give a chance to!). Also, if anyone has any anime recommendations, let me know! I’m open to most things except gratuitous gore.

Also, I don’t know if you guys knew but I’m also an artist who is coming out with an inktober zine very soon... and if you’d like to support visit my patreon: patreon.com/graceofaeons  and all the details for my zine will be uploaded soon!

See youu, till I see youuu!

[lostinthe-pines-blog]

Fate Doesn’t Write My Stories pt. 6 - Dreamers

This is a multi-chapter story about MC, and Chris finding their way back together after years of being separated post graduation. Chris’s career takes him to Boston, a city he’d promised was her territory. But it’s not just Chris, fate has seemingly brought the entire Hartfeld crew back together.

NOTE: This is a fictional story based on Pixelberry’s Choices App. *Books The Freshman, The Sophomore, The Junior. I am not affiliated with Pixelberry nor do I own the rights to their original characters.

 Tags @jared2612  @katurrade @annekebbphotography 

The little red light on the bottom left of MC’s ancient laptop began to flash, her battery was dying. Had they really been talking that long? MC grabbed a pen to continue taking notes as she powered down her laptop. She’s really hit it off now with the young athlete and his stories intrigued her. Three hours they’d been talking, shocked the pair of them hadn’t been kicked out of the small coffee shop she looked around her gaze focusing out the bay window she’d looked out before. Her focus was pulled from the conversation as she noticed Chris sitting on a park bench a crossed the street. Her mind began to wonder… had he been there the entire time? MC looked back to Miles as the two of them finished their conversation.

“Thank you again for meeting with me” She thanked him graciously. “I’ll do my best to put out the honest and true version of who you are. The Patriots are lucky to have a player like you.”

Miles nods humbly but doesn't dwell on her praises. “Would you mind if I asked you a question? You don’t have to answer it…” he pauses patiently waiting her response.

“Sure?” she responds cautiously.

“I know nothing about you or your past with Chris, but I do know whatever he did he’s extremely sorry for it. Would you ever think about giving him a second chance?”

Miles inquiry settles in her mind as she looks down to her lap. How was she supposed to tell Miles that Chris had ruined any chance of that when her body was telling her otherwise. After a few uncomfortably long moments MC looks up to Miles. “I have a boyfriend” she gives a simple and childish answer.

“That is the most bullshit excuse..” Miles yells and MC knows it’s true. “I spent 3 hours baring my soul to you MC and the best you give me is ‘I have a boyfriend’. I would have rather you taken my offer not to answer at all” his voice playful now. “Seriously set your boyfriend aside, does my friend” he pauses “Does my best friend, even have a chance with you? Or should I tell him to move on?”

MC takes a deep breath and admits to herself, and the stranger before her something she’d know for the last 4 years. If Chris ever sobered up, if he ever apologized and came back she knew she’d fall for him again. MC’s eyes meet Miles now as she tries to resist the urge to speak the truth. “Yes, he does” she says lightly and shoves her notepad in her purse. Reaching her hand out quickly for a handshake she stands from her seat. “Thank you for the interview, I’ll send you a copy of the article before sending it to publish.” she harshly changes the subject and Miles yet again stops her.

“MC you promised me something in return for this” he reminds her his gaze moving out the bay window to where she’d been looking before.  “That man has waited outside on that bench for 3 hours.” his voice soft, “Him and I drove separately, he’s not out there waiting for me.” Miles looks to her shaking her hand and walking away, as he reaches the door he looks back to the auburn haired writer. “Don’t break your promise to me MC.” his voice serious and almost threatening.

MC stands in the coffee shop her head and heart pounding. She needed to get home she needed to start writing but her moral compass was leading her toward the rusted park bench. “Ughhhh.” she exclaimed while forcing her laptop into her bag out of frustration. She looks out the window, Miles gone and Chris still waiting. She swings her bag over her shoulder and jay walks a crossed the street quickly.

Chris is so focused on whatever he’s reading on his phone he doesn’t even see her coming. He’s startled when her voice fills his ears.

“I keep my promises, whether I want to or not.” her voice stern now as she fights her body’s instincts. “So you wanna talk? This might be your only chance.” MC was straight forward and bold. She’d been burned by this sandy haired boy before and she had truly learned from it. She was independent now, she didn’t need a man anymore, not even Carter.

Chris’s eyes meet hers already apologetic. “Can I walk you somewhere?” Chris asks standing to meet her. “If by the end of it you don’t want to talk again, we don’t have to. I’ll continue to run Miles’s publicity through you but that will be the extent of our communication.”

MC nods one hand resting on the strap of her bag she falls in line next to the man who’d once consumed her every thought. The pair of them walk silently for far too long before Chris realizes he’s missing out on time with her.

“You look great” he starts and immediately regrets his choice in words. “Not that you didn’t before MC.” his eyes fall to the ground as he leads her up the street. “I’m an open book now and I want you to ask me anything… I’ll answer. You deserve answers.”

MC looks to him but his eyes never leave the ground. She studies his face and feels worry radiating off of him. Four years ago she would have used this opportunity to yell about anything but now she only had a few questions. “Was it hard? Your recovery? Was it hard?”

Chris looks over at her shocked and for the first time in four years their eyes finally meet. He mindlessly studies the hazel coloring and she focuses on the once comforting blue. He’s shocked that out of everything she could ask her question was about him, about his healing. He’s taken back but he does his best to answer honestly.

“It took a year to truly snap out of it” he recalls “I moved back home and for the sake of my siblings my mom cut me off of everything. I’d be lying if I said it was easy. The pain and headaches, detoxing it was all horrible. Having to face my sister knowing that she knew I wasn’t truly myself anymore, that was harder. I couldn’t be the brother she’d looked up too... It was around Christmas that year that I finally started to find myself again, I worked for a Christmas Tree lot. I spent a lot of time chopping, wrapping and driving trees around. That time alone in the cold was what truly healed me. By March I’d finally stopped craving alcohol though it still tempts me even today. I haven’t had a drop since that March.” he answers with a hint of pride. “It was the longest year of my life though there were a few small victories. Almost a year to the date of the crash I won the lawsuit against the driver. He was jailed  and I came into enough money to get me back on my feet.”

MC analyzes his response, “I’m happy for you Chris.” she says softly almost hoping he wouldn’t hear it. “How’d you end up working with Miles?” she questions avoiding the subject of their demise at all.

“My recruiter from the Eagles, he met with me in August of the following year. He was very good to me when he didn’t need to be. He said he saw promise in me not just in my sports talent but my business talent as well. He offered me a job to assist him for a year, try my hand at the business side of the NFL.” Chris laughs, “It was the closest I’d been to a football field in over a year and I loved it. After my year I got a couple recommendations and a coworker Jonathan asked me to move with him to co manage a new player for the Seahawks. While Jonathan quit halfway through the season Miles asked me to stay and I can’t imagine turning my back on him now. He’s frustrating, but he’s also wise beyond his years.”  

MC doesn’t respond this time allowing silence to fall over them again. She begins to recognize the streets they were walking down. She didn’t know what exactly he was playing at but he was leading her to Harvard. They enter through an opening in one of the gates and they begin to walk through the connected courtyards surrounding the old stone buildings. MC knew this campus as if she’d attended here. She toured the school three separate times in high school.  Chris leads her to the cement steps outside of the Widener Library. They sit next to each other sharing a step near the top in the shade. MC is uncertain of why he’d lead her hear, but her heart knew he had deeper intentions behind the choice.

“I know this place means a lot to you.” Chris begins knowing now he’ll be entering treacherous grounds. “I don’t want to ruin it by talking to you here but I need you to know a few things.” he looks over at her trying his hardest not to break eye contact no matter how truthful he became. “The biggest mistake I have ever made was letting you go. I had convinced myself that you would be better off without me. And you have been, you’ve built a life for yourself. But that Christmas I realized how much I really missed you. I knew you’d never forgive me so I had to live without you. I tried dating” he laughs “None of them worked out… in fact some of them were completely disastrous.” he chuckles at the memories running through his head. “None of them were you.”

“Chris…” MC begins but doesn't know how to continue. Her mind wanted to scream and yell and remind him of the pain he’d put her through but her heart and her gut wanted to hug him to remind him of what her embrace felt like. She’d never really felt this type of conflict before.

“I just want you to know that you’re the only girl for me. I’m sure I could fool myself into loving someone else, but deep down I know they wouldn't be you. Regardless I made my bed and I fully intend to lie in it. I let you go and that was my mistake.” he moves his eyes from her proud yet saddened by his confession. Looking at his fidgeting hands in his lap now he speaks again. “Harvard was your dream, and NFL was mine. While neither of us truly accomplished those dreams they are still apart of us. It’s my hope that in the last four years you haven’t stopped dreaming. I hope that you still wear your Harvard sweatshirt from your Jr. High years whenever you get cold at night. I was truly unlucky to not be there to share the past few years with you but it is my strongest hope that you will let me share the next few. Maybe not by your side but as your friend and truly as one of your biggest fans.”

MC boldly moves her right hand over his and slides her left hand to his cheek to lift his eyes to her. “You broke me.” She admits her eyes full of pain. She watches the pain transfer to his eyes though he doesn’t look away. “And I would love nothing more than to let you in, to let you fix this. But I’ve changed and unlike you I have fallen in love again.” she lies now, she’s using Carter as an excuse not to open up. MC loved Carter but knew she would never be with him forever. She selfishly kept him around.

“Friends then?” Chris questions.

MC flashes him a smile “Friends” she agrees.

The two of them wandered the campus for hours stopping at bookstores, coffee shops and gift shops as they caught up. Chris shares the stories of a few disastrous dates and MC shares about her promiscuous roommate Molly. They laugh about both of them avoiding Becca’s wedding in fear of seeing each other. The sun has gone down now and MC has lost all her writing time and forgotten her promise to celebrate with Carter. The two of them finally approach her apartment building and she turns to say goodbye. “Chris, Kaitlyn has a concert here in Boston tomorrow night. Zack, Becca and I are all going… you should join us.” she offers.

“I wouldn’t miss it” he nods and takes a step backwards down the steps leading toward her door.

“Wait!” MC says reluctant again to say goodbye. She follows his movements down the step and kisses his cheek softly, lingering longer than she should have. “It’s good to have you back.” she admits before turning inside quickly.

[truthbeetoldmedia]

The 100 5x12 "Damocles Pt 1" Review

Guys…..I don’t even know. This show was my favorite TV show in years, maybe ever until this season (well, I kinda didn’t love Season 4 but that finale was so amazing I was still hooked) but now I don’t even know how the show wants me to feel? Do the writers want us all to stop watching? This season went off the rails after episode 5x05 and I am not a happy camper so be prepared for a salty review.

The good:

“Say hello to my little friend.” Murphy quoting Scarface as he shoots the giant laser gun, only for him to screw it up and almost blow everyone up is grade A John Murphy content.

While I’m on that scene with the laser gun, I just want to say that Dean White has such an eye for cinematography and I loved the way this whole scene was shot. Same with the march through the gorge, this episode did nail directing!

Emori and Murphy exchanging little smiles after he uses the same screw up later to give them cover to escape in the rover. Post apocalyptic Bonnie and Clyde 4ever.

SHAW. Miles Zeke “I will break if they torture you” Shaw. He is a treasure guys, he would rather die by being electrocuted than live knowing he killed hundreds of people or was the reason Raven got tortured. Protect this man. I want him and Raven to spend forever together.

Echo reading Clarke to filth for leaving Bellamy to likely die in the fighting pit because she was angry. This will be extended into the “bad” and “ugly” section.

Monty calmly telling Echo he’s not doing what she wants him to do over the radio.

Abby and Clarke actually having an affectionate second as mom and daughter...even though it was still kinda empty.

Clarke FINALLY waking up and helping her friends...this will also show up in my bad/ugly section.

Indra and Gaia having an actual mother/daughter moment. ”I’m not leaving my daughter” I want them both to survive, they deserve to be happy with each other.

I loved Octavia finally realizing how bad of a leader she’s been, I do not want her to get off the hook that easy. She has made terrible decisions and they lead up to this first 10 minutes of the episode, with her loyal army getting butchered in front of her. Of course the first to die was the little boy she had taught to fight, Ethan being the symbol of Octavia’s “hope” for the future of her people, (I hate the word Wonkru) and all of them mowed down in front of her. But I also hate it took this to get through to her — Thelonious Jaha is so disappointed in her.

“Guess she’s not up for mother of the year.” Raven as she’s taking the shock collar off Madi, TRULY iconic.

BELLAMY BLAKE is consistently the only “good” part of this show for me anymore (aside from Monty, who is almost as absent as his criminally underutilized other half Harper), and this episode we saw Bellamy do what he does best! Protect his sister, save people, put others first; but also he stands up for himself and tells Octavia “This is is all your fault, all these people died because of you.” YES, SON! Let her have it! Don’t hold back! When Octavia says, “Do you want me to die?” And he just responds, “Yes,” we know he didn’t honestly mean that considering how much he tried to keep her alive this episode.

Bellamy’s pep talk to Gaia — “Keep fighting, if not for you then for her” — and him carrying her warmed my heart.

Octavia saying “Wonkru is broken, I broke it” and Indra just flat out saying “Yes you did.”

Clarke reminding Echo that she has blood on her hands. “Don’t think all those people you helped blow up in Mt Weather didn’t count because you were following orders.” I about stood up on my feet and clapped.

Also in this same scene Clarke’s face when Echo tells her Bellamy isn’t dead and he survived her betrayal, girl was SHOOK. And the exchange of “Don’t pretend like you care about Bellamy now” and Clarke interjecting “I ALWAYS cared” — too bad this is the extent of emotion she gets to show for Bellamy in the last two episodes...when in reality she should have been crying buckets of tears.

The last second rescue of Bellamy and Co. in the gorge right when you think Octavia’s “fight is over.” It was great to see the rover back in action Monty and crew saving their friends, I just wish Clarke was there too.

I do think this episode had good moments. BUT hold onto your hats, we are about to dive deep into some salt! And also some plot lines that they seem to be “retconning” for no reason except to give fanservice to a group of people far too late and in the worst way possible...without further ado:

The bad:

Well, there were several little things that I was honestly confused by.

Kane and Vinson...what was that scene for? What did it accomplish? It was so random — what were Vinson's motivations, why did he want Abby to keep being a pill head? I loved the way he went out and the acting between Henry Ian Cusick and Mike Dopud is fabulous but, honestly, it was pointless and had no real impact on the story, like half of the plot this season if I’m being honest.

Why is the Flame and how it interfaces with the commander the most inconsistently written plot this show has ever done? Raven spent half her time in Season 3B reading Becca’s journals and explaining how the Flame works — but now it seems to work any way the writers need it to? In episode 3x12 Monty asks Raven if the minds uploaded to the City of Light (which I’m assuming is a large scale version of the Flame where thousands of “consciousnesses” can be uploaded and exist at once since Becca designed both): “There’s a chance my mom’s still alive?” to which Raven replies, “Depends on your definition of alive.” In 5x12 when Madi so creepily channels “Lexa” it’s indeed not her but a saved version of her mind from before her death, so Madi should be able to theoretically access her memories BUT in no way should Lexa be conscious to what’s going on in the present and “speak through” Madi — If this were the case why didn’t Becca tell the previous commanders who she was? That the flame was tech and not a spirit? Why didn’t the commander during the first Mount Weather troubles tell the next one about how to defeat them or how to help them therefore make peace? Why didn’t they tell Lexa the “threat” that crashed to earth was actually 100 CHILDREN that didn’t want to die or kill they just wanted to survive? IT DOESN’T MAKE SENSE GUYS. Jason, if you happen to read this, EXPLAIN.

In the same episode we are told the flame is ALIE 2.0 made to merge with and enhance the brain of the “host” aka commander. She goes on to say the reason commanders didn’t know it was AI was because the program “degraded over time.” SO how pray tell did a 12 year old girl reset the password on this thing when the 15 or however many prior commanders couldn’t? EXPLAIN. How did she channel a commander when from what we’ve been told it’s never been done, or grounders wouldn’t be technology fearing, warring clans? This plot has more holes than a wheel of Swiss cheese.

I’m gonna stop yelling about this, I promise. I just hate this whole plot and the Flame should’ve went up in flames during Praimfaya.

Killing Ethan. So Thelonious Jaha literally dies to save his adopted son, and he is the first casualty in the gorge? Really, writers? Jaha lost his biological son, Wells, grieved him for almost 5 seasons and in turn sacrifices his life to protect his surrogate son the way he couldn’t protect his biological one, and this is how Jaha is rewarded? I really can’t believe.

The general attitude the writers seem to have about Clarke’s emotions and love, etc. Yes, she can miss Lexa, BUT I don’t believe the levels she misses a person that she knew in total for 4 months and hated approximately 3 months and one day, but not still be gutted over losing her best friend of FIFTEEN YEARS, WELLS JAHA. Or her actual father, or Bellamy — her canon post-Wells best friend in the series — whom she thinks she left to DIE? And if she can forgive Lexa’s multiple betrayals so quick she should already have forgiven Bellamy and feel like the worst person, to be honest. This season has treated the character of Clarke Griffin poorly and she deserved better.

On that subject, why is Clarke a side character instead of the lead female character? Why is her storyline like post apocalyptic Mommy Dearest? Why is she yet again isolated from her friends and family? EXPLAIN.

Okay now that I’ve gotten the above off my chest we are gonna dive straight into

The ugly:

Phew! I tell ya what, this season has exhausted me mentally and emotionally and not for good reasons.

Clarke won’t remove the flame from Madi because she “promised her” but she will force a shock collar on her and shock her with the voltage that brings a full grown man to the ground? REALLY, YOU GUYS WENT THERE? Are any of you even parents?

The whole storyline that Madi can see and feel Lexa’s memories is a whole other level of ICK! I didn’t think I’d ever have to deal with on this show. There are so many ways the writers could have not “gone there” with this story: never letting Madi have the flame, making sure we understood Madi, a twelve-year-old child, could only see relevant memories of the commanders, etc., but no. Instead, they imply that the former “lover” of her “mom” can consciously “speak” through her and show/tell the child anything. It is disturbing and I cannot believe the writers actually went there and were okay with it. Again, I am shocked that some of these people have children because they are not treated well in this show. And the  parents are usually the worst offenders.

On that note, I’d like to mention Abby’s advice and Clarke LISTENING. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate Abby, and I know she’s always “tried” but she has been for 90% of the show a terrible parent. You would not want to use her as a role model for good parenting, that’s for sure.

It’s not a for sure thing yet, but if that end scene of “saving” Bellamy, Gaia and Indra is Octavia’s “redemption” I am gonna pop a forehead vein. Bellamy and Clarke still get what they did seasons ago thrown in their faces daily. I expect this x 100 for Octavia because she actively chose to do all the hideous things she did. She is not a hero, she is a villain and should be treated as such for the rest of the season. She can get a “redemption” next season if she has to have one.

If you made it through this very critical review I applaud you (and if any of the writers or directors read this, know that I respect your talent; this ranting is because I know what you guys are capable of and it’s so much better than what I’ve see this season).

To end things on a slightly positive note, next week is the season finale! Can you believe it’s already here?! Also can you believe we’ve survived this VERY rocky season? There have definitely been great moment this season, just not enough. But here are the things I’m looking forward to  or hope happen next week:

We finally get to meet Shannon Kook’s character! I’ve been waiting to meet him for months!

Hopefully Bellamy and Clarke reconcile and reconnect, I miss their amazing bond and protectiveness of one another.

Hopefully Kane and Gaia are alive and healing?

After she helps Wonkru, I hope Madi has the flame removed and it gets destroyed, never to be mentioned again.

I hope Diyoza and her baby are A-OK and we will see them next season. Same goes for Shaw, I want him alive and happy being the sweet love Raven Reyes has always deserved.

I want Clarke to mend her relationships with all of her friends and people, to apologize and to accept apologies. I want her to feel loved, I am tired of her always being isolated.

I want Bellamy to feel loved and understood, especially by Clarke and not in a “shippy” way (though I’m all for it). I want her to acknowledge that she left him to die, that she sorely regrets it and that she loves him especially if she can express that kind of sentiment for a computer hard drive and someone she liked for two weeks of her life. Bellamy and Clarke deserve an entire episode to work through their stuff because their relationship is literally the central relationship of the entire series, and to not let them acknowledge what they mean to each other and make amends does the show and the characters a disservice.

I want the season to end with hope! This season in ways has been more depressing and frustrating than Season 3 ever dreamed of being. We need light at the end of the tunnel or Season 6 may have an audience of 17 people. Levity and hope don't take away from drama and angst if executed correctly. If you can’t write both sides into the same space it’s not a problem with your story, it’s a problem with who’s writing it.  

I will have hope that they can and will do better (the characters and the writers) until the end BUT I will still bring the salt when I need to.

I give this episode 3 bees because it had potential, great cinematography, and some great Murphy one liners. But it was overall flat and disappointing.

What were your thoughts of this episode? What are you hoping for in the finale? Comment below!

And tune in to the season finale next week! Our founder Sam will be live tweeting and writing up the finale review!

The 100 airs at 8/7c on The CW.

Gina’s episode rating: 🐝🐝🐝

[13unknownmind]

What I have to say about Supergirl... Thoughts, theories, things I see as probable to happen and some hopes that I have for next season.

Alright so I will start with a... SPOILER ALERT if you have not seen the Supergirl finally then you might want to turn back now... For those who have or just want to continue reading enjoy.

Now on to what I think.

As of today we have seen all we can until the fall so that is... Fantastic (total sarcasm) but we have to this point seen inconsistent writing and a lot of bad decisions. But we have also seen a lot of good things happen, so let's start with Sam.

Sam, has successfully stayed alive and with the help of Supergirl defeated Reign, made it back to her daughter and we will see how they go along with life next season.

I am hoping that Sam, Alex and Ruby stay in very constant contact and become the closet thing to a family that all that could be left is to actually become one, meaning a possible story line for maybe a three or so episodes where we see Alex struggling to admit her feeling for Sam do to insecurities and or her not wanting to mess up the friendship that they have now and Sam is waiting for Alex to show any sign of wanting to be more then friends cause she has accidentally fallen in love and is making sure that Alex might feel the same way then Ruby either pushes them both to do what she can clearly see they both want to do or just being extremely happy that they finally got together so she has two moms that she knows love her.

As for Alex, now that she is the director of the DEO she can cut back on the field work and make sure that she has nothing holding her back from fulfilling her dreams and living her life how she wants it to be. Like I said the Alex and Sam story would be wonderful to see as well as the possiblity of them adopting another child (that child could even turn out to be either a hero or villain in later years like a story where we see him or her come back in time like trucks in Dragon Ball Z or something) and seeing them come together even more to raise this child with the help of their friends and daughter.

Side note: it would be so amazing to see a married Sam and Alex like them going through the wedding and then Alex adopting Ruby as her own daughter. I would cry.

I would also love to see them grow as characters with each other cause we have two developed characters and we have seen both of their stories we know they are both strong and intelligent woman who can and will do anything for the ones they love and we have seen them both get to a point where they can grow both together and apart and I am so looking forward to seeing what the writers do... I hope they do not screw this up.

Now this is a character that we saw leave a little while back Maggie now this is something that a lot of people would call me crazy for saying so thank you now moving on, I think that whether or not they make Alex and Sam a thing which they should I think Maggie coming back into Alexs life would be a nice twist to the somewhat predictable show overall now think for a second two or three scenarios pop into my head so let's go over them.

Scenario Numero Uno-

Maggie pops back in and tries to get Alex back and see if they can work things out cause let's be for real if anyone was watching the same thing I was when they parted ways neither one of them wanted to let go of the other and let's be real with ourselves for a moment we was all saying "NO DON'T GO" and it would be a little bit of added drama for Alex to deal with and get through and hey if they set it up correctly this could be a lead up to the Sam and Alex story line.

Scenario number two-

Maggie and Alex run into each other and Alex is so shook she breaksdown and runs off or something cause she is finally over Maggie and bam here she is and the not so over Maggie side show comes out cause there is still something unresolved and that could lead to a few story lines like Kara helping her sister through it like she always does and them doing a "Closure Montage or Ceremony" or something... Or it could lead to Sam comforting Alex and helping her get through it ← that could be the reason they get together or while they are together and they could take that a lot of places as well.

Scenario #3

Maggie could have changed her mind about kids and come to find Alex so they could get back together and start a family, which again could lead to several different storyline.

Like- Alex turning her down for either the reason that she has moved on, the reason that she is already interested in someone else (cough cough Sam cough), Alex could have decided that jumping into her work at the DEO was best for her for a while, while she is trying to get things together or while she is deal with something emotionally or that she is simply not going through the whole Maggie and kids things just to protect her heart.

J'onn, I just look forward to seeing what's up with him and his new fownd life away from the DEO.

Winn, I don't see much word from him coming from the future but then again you never know cause the writers on this show like to do odd things... So we will see.

Brainy, we know that he is at the DEO thanks to the seen we see of him opening the envelope from Winn, so he will probably be "taking Winns place" there until I would assume probably season 5.

Mon-El, probably no word or at the very least two or three appearances throughout the next season but I don't see much happening with him until season 5 probably as well but as I said you never know, I am just hoping that his and Karas romantic thing is over soon cause 1 it takes away from the show and the rest of the story if we have 3-5 episodes in a 23 episode season just about the I love you and I love you but we can't be together bs. And 2 I honestly want him and the woman that is supposed to be his wife to actually be together as the married couple they are.

James, I hope that this "unmasking" thing works out for him and that he makes a good life as the guardian of national City but for Gods sake please end he and Lena's relationship cause that is all kinds of wrong on so many levels I just can't with the writers of this show and as for his actual job can we please see him back at cat co actually doing that thing called work cause really... DUDE YOU HAVE A COMPANY TO RUN!!!!!!!!!

Cat, can we please see Cat grant back on this show the world needs Cat.

Eve, what is goin' on with Lena's new lab assistant cause last time I checked the "ditzy blond" can surprise people but come on now what is happening and why was she even working at CatCo.?

Ruby, I know I brought her up but I am talking about her now. I hope to see Ruby learning a lot for both her mom and Alex and making sure that they stay together so we can see a relationship grow between Ruby and the rest of the family that is the team and hopefully Alex and Sam.

Lena, yes we are finally to the one and only Lena Luthor. Ok dude I understand you know your best friend is a super hero and I also understand you are only with the guy your with to try and get over the feelings that you have for and even get back at said best friend but dude what is going on it is almost like Kara having James check out your vault which he didn't do though he said he would and almost did was the straw that broke the Camels back even though 1 you know your best friend trusts you just not with the one thing that can hurt her though I think she was just putting on a show for the DEO and 2 You are fighting against what I can only assume is depression at finding out that you do not feel as platonicly towards Kara as you thought you did only to both find out that she is Supergirl and that she "doesn't trust you" though she does and everything that has happened before this should show that the only reason she has not told you herself that she is Supergirl is the DEO would never allow it so come on cut her some slack and for the whole making synthetic Kryptonite be it green or black and not telling your best friend is kinda messed up though I do understand testing her to make sure of some things. Now let's look at what has happened lately 1 the Green kryptonite that Lena made and Kara started a fight over not only helping to defeat reign but also save everyone in the DEO. 2 Kara not one time yelled at Alex for the use of kryptonite in anyway... 3 Lena just right away forgave James for even thinking about going into her vault (because he is of no real consequence) but she did not forgive Kara "Supergirl" for asking him (because she is the most important person she has in her life and to just forgive and forget would never help them grow as friends). I don't care what anyone says Supercorp is for real man Lena and Kara are so in love with each other it is tangible, though of course the queerbaiting is strong with this one. We will talk about the end scene in a minute and try to break that down.

Now last but not least Kara. There is so much to say right here so let's get started. 1 Kara is totally only telling herself how much she loves Mon-El clearly so lets just not with that situation. 2 So she can't breathe in space but Superman can????? I am so lost here. 3 Are the writers aware of the fact that she has super hearing so she could have stopped Sam the first time but no of course time travel randomly throwing in there to fill up the full 40-plus minutes. 4 Can we just look at how she sent her best friend to the future and didn't even really cry not sure when or even if he would come back. 5 Can we please talk about the fact that she just reset a time line and no one cares but when Barry does it the whole world changes... #superpoint ... 6 Please CW writers give us what we need, Kara finally having the "I'm Supergirl" talk with Lena and the two of them mending the friendship and working through everything they have to get through to be better then they were and maybe become more then friends... Please

Now that I have talked the ears off let's get into the episode and break some stuff down.

Alright now we have a defeated Reign and a safe world... Nope we have a Supergirl clone that is probably a world killer... Great so now we have to kill Supergirl for the what third time I think so let's just think here she walked up to Russian soldiers on duty if I an correct said nothing and that is all we saw so there is a lot that they can do with that but again only if they get it right so let's pray that they don't do to season 4 what they did to season 3 though it was good it could have been better... Anyway moving on to the last scene Lena with more of the black kryptonite after she told momma super that there was no more (probably cause she knows something is gonna happen) I am not gonna just jump on the she is going evil band wagon but I will say that if she does turn evil I will not be ok with that...

Let's all hope something happens and Lena dumps James like he ain't hot.

We all know a few things that are gonna happen for sure in season 4.

1 Kara is still gonna be Supergirl.

2 Alex is gonna be a rockin' DEO director.

3 Lena and Kara are gonna be alright but Lena and Supergirl are gonna need some work.

4 James is gonna be out as guardian.

5 The DEO is gonna be working with non-lethal equipment.

6 Brainy is gonna be learning how to live in the 21 century.

7 We are gonna find out both what Lena has going on and what is up with not only Kara and what she has happening but also the Kara clone.

I know nothing of what the writers are going to do but I do know what I want to see so please 1 do not think that this is all the future of Supergirl cause if I was making the future of this show Supercorp would already be a thing as well as the Sam and Alex story would be a thing next season and 2 if you agree, disagree or have any thoughts on anything that I have said or on things that I have not said but would like to discuss just leave a comment or message me and let me know what you think thanks for reading and if you got this far you are awesome ✌️ take care and God bless