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stardancerluv · 1 month ago

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A Time to Fight and to Love

Part Thirty - Three

Summary: Thoughts of the past and the future come together.

Notes/Warnings: angst, thoughts of one’s life, mention of one’s death.

A few translations:

Are you well, my love? - Tu vas bien, mon amour ?

Yes, my love. I only missed you is all when a nightmare had struck. - Oui mon amour. Tu ne m'as manqué que lorsqu'un cauchemar a frappé.

My love, my angel you and our child is a gift, I never thought would be given to me but they were. - Mon amour, mon ange, toi et notre enfant êtes un cadeau, je n'aurais jamais pensé qu'il me serait offert mais ils l'étaient.

❤️s, comments, feedback & reblogs are always welcome! Thank you for reading. We are beginning to near the end! 🥹

With a start, you awoke turning you looked for Enjolras for solace but he wasn’t there. His side of the bed was cold.

Perhaps, he was in his study. Pulling the blanket aside, you got out of bed. Holding up some of your chemise as to not trip, you kept to the carpet. Despite, the wooden floorboards being well kept they were too cool for your liking at this hour. They were much better than the ones you had grown used to back home with Mama. She had to be alright, she just had to be. However, those floorboards would creak with only a mere at gaze upon them and snagged all of your dresses.

The warmth from the fire that burned was what greeted you first upon opening the door.

“Tu vas bien, mon amour ?”

You glanced towards in the direction of the raspy voice, that reassured and made your heart skip beats. In front of the flickering flames, you spied the silhouette that could only ever belong to Enjolras.

“Oui mon amour. Tu ne m'as manqué que lorsqu'un cauchemar a frappé.”

“I am sorry my love.” He glanced up at you before draininy the liquid in the glass, he held. Moving the glass to his other hand, he patted a place beside him. “Come sit beside me.”

Just being near him once again and you relaxed.

Wrapping an arm around you, he held you close. You could just get a whiff of the spicy liquid he had been sipping at.

“Did sleep elude you?”

“Yes.”

As you glanced at him, he made a face. “Despite all the fretting at getting mother settled in, I still could not get ahold of sleep.”

“It will be nice to have her here.”

He rose an eyebrow as your eyes met.

“Mostly. I still cannot believe that Beatrice and her were familiar with each other. She is certainly a very determined woman.”

“She raised an equally, determined son.”

He chuckled. You loved that sound.

He drained what was left in his glass, before placing the glass on the table beside the two of you.

“Yes.” He nodded. “Yes, she did do that.”

“Enjolras, what is plaguing you?”

Hmm? He made a questioning sound as he rose his eyebrows.

You sat up the best you could with your growing tummy. At the moment, the baby seemed to be relaxed or at the very least comfortable and wasn’t moving and turning like they liked to do more often than not these days.

He didn’t look at you.

“Enjolras, look at me.”

His dark eyes moved from the flickering flames to you and once more were back fixed on the flames.

“I know that it is something other than the arrival of your mother.”

His mouth formed a line, he swallowed.

“The solider who has been hunting me has arrived. I do believe, he has taken up with one of the barmaids. And he has enjoyed some card games with her and others.”

“Oh? Oh!” Now you were the one who looked away. “What are you going to do?”

“I sent word for Bellamy to join me at the tavern, tomorrow night. And I shall go and meet my destiny.” He exhaled.

“Don’t talk like that.” Your emotions flared.

He took your hand and squeezed it.

“Mon amour, mon ange, toi et notre enfant êtes un cadeau, je n'aurais jamais pensé qu'il me serait offert mais ils l'étaient.” He pressed his lips together. “I should already be dead, I should have died at the barricade.”

“No, no! Don’t talk like that. You were given a chance to be with me, to be a father. You have to hold me a little longer, you have to hold our child.”

A tear escaped and slide down your cheek.

You trembled as his warm hand cupped your cheek, his thumb wiping away the tear.

“I, I…”

Any words, any other sentiment you could have shared were silenced as his lips met yours.

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stardancerluv · 4 months ago

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A Time to Love and to Fight

Part Thirty - Two

Summary: While enjoying the city they live near, Reader is visited by the past. Enjolras is confronted by his past and his future.

Warning/Notes - No real warnings. Just building dread.

eau de Cologne - how cologne was referred to

reticule - a type of purse for a woman in the past.

Sorry about the time between chapters. I wrote and rewrote this alot!!! It’s a long chapter with a flashback.

❤️s, comments, reblogs & feedback is always welcome!

You delighted on watching Enjolras. He spoke easily with the harbor master. His air and command of the situation made you happy. He was firm but pleasant and never belittling.

As they pointed into the bay, you followed their fingers pleased that you could also spot the ship. You gave a moment of pause in gratitude that your time of traveling on the water was over.

Oddly, you were reminded of the stories those women shared of their husbands still gave you shivers. You could never be wed to such beasts. Just as you were pleased with him, the baby shifted within you, made you believe they were pleased to too. You laid a gentle on your stomach.

Turning, he smiled and walked towards you.

“The ship is on an easy and straight course for its arrival. The master spoke of how I should bring you to shops and buy you something nice.” A smile played on his lips.

You gave him a sweet smile. “You don’t have to.”

“I don’t know, I may want to.”

You rose your eyebrows. “We have bought so much for our home. Are you sure?”

He nodded. “My dear wife, I do believe I should have given you something a long time ago.”

Taking his arm you followed him as he led you away from the docks.

You looked around making sure you stepped carefully. “Us, here and safe is enough.”

He squeezed your your hand. “As much as I do not enjoy extreme excess, you need some possession especially since you are the lady of our household.”

“Thank you, my love.”

*******

“Good day, Sir Julien.” Greeted a kind looking older man, he was wiping his hands on a cloth. He stopped upon seeing you. “Oh? Is this the lady of the house?”

You nodded and glanced up at Enjolras. He smiled down at you.

“Dear, this Mr Jameson. He has supplied our home with many treasures.”

“You have parted with many different items.”

He nodded. “I am sure your house is much grander for it.”

“It is.” You nod. “Thank you.” Slipping your arm free, you wandered away as the two began to speak of other items he may or may not be receiving soon.

The house, that you and Enjolras were now were residing were becoming quite grand. It reminded you of your home before the disappearance of your father. It had held several treasures before having sell them so that your mama and you could keep the home.

You sighed and continued to look at all the great items that remained. Some of which shifted your mood and made you relieved that Enjolras had such good eye. You would have been aghast to have them.

You were drawn to an array of some powder boxes. They made you smile. Looking at a few, you were reminded of one night when mama was preparing for one of the parties her and father would be hosting. She had opened one of her elegant boxes and gave her bosom a dusting. You had been watching, peering actually in from the bedroom doorway.

“I see you my sweet little cabbage. Would you like to be like mama and have some perfumed powder tonight?”

You nodded. You hurried over. Stopping, you stood tall while also attempting to be as elegant as you could.

A warm giggle came from her. “Ok. Close your eyes.”

You squeezed them shut. Next you felt a soft brush on your nose. The sweet scent of honeysuckle filled your nose.

“Perfect.” She said with a gentle air. “Now you are all ready for the party.”

******

He was pleased to hear that the cradles had come in. You being here was timely. He could not and would not have wanted to decide on one or even two without your guidance.

“I will go and find her. I am sure she is enjoying the sight of your treasures.”

“Treasures.” He made a dismissive gesture. “They are what makes a household, a home.”

He nodded. “They are that.”

The floor boards creaked under his boots as he walked down another aisle where he spotted you. As he drew closer, he saw a faraway look eyes.

“Ange?” He whispered, wrapping an arm around you.

You glanced up. “I…I…”

He smiled. “You looked terribly faraway my love, where were you?”

“I was.”

You replied with a soft smile that had a trace of sadness to it. You pointed to the powder boxes in front of you.

“They remind me of mama.”

You pointed to the porcelain boxes in front of you.

“Oh? Look at those.”

He drew from you and looked down at them and back at you. He knew how he treasured the glass bottle that held the sharp aftershave that his father gave him.

“Choose among them what you wish to have and they will be yours.”

You brought a gloved hand to your lips, in the muted light he could see happiness brighten them.

“Yes.” He nodded. “They will have a wonderful place on your vanity.”

*****

You held onto two of small boxes and were wrapped tightly in cloth. You could not wait to place them on your vanity. They were perfect.

******

Now, a new happiness filled you at the sight of them sitting there. Berceaux, cribs bassinets all for you and Enjolras to choose from for your baby. You brought a hand to your growing belly as you considered them.

It took some time, testing the ease of the rocking and evaluating the size. Also, you had to make sure none made too much noise when it moved. In the end, Enjolras and you settled on three of the five that stood in front of you. One for you Enjolras’s private chambers, one for the child’s respective nursery and another that they could easily move around if they wished to sit in the gardens or the library and wanted to have the baby with them.

“I will wrap these up in haste.” The man older man patted one of them. “I will fetch Edmund. Together, we will bring these down the docks.”

Enjolras nodded. “Good. Thank you.”

******

The ship surely has arrived by now, if he had learned anything these last few months the timing of ships in clear weather was becoming familiar to him.

Turning to you. with a gentle ease of his hand on your lower back. He made his way with you out to the cobbled street.

“Angel, I will walk you to the perfumery. That is where I found the ones that have already brought the most pleasant scents to the airs of our chambers and for you to feel even lovelier.”

“Is it close?”

“Yes.” He nodded. “And then I will return to the docks and check on the arrival of the boat.”

******

You watched as he spoke warmly with the gentleman in the worn brown coat whose collar looked especially stiff. But had a soft demeanor.

Turning, Enjolras closed the distance between the two of you once more. “Love, this is Mr. Barlowe. He can assist you while I go and check on things with the harbor master.”

“Thank you.” You turned and smiled at the man.

********

Enjolras enjoyed having you along. Though a cloud, a shadow of worry did chase his ankles. Though keeping you tucked away at the estate disliked more.

With it being such a lovely day, he was relieved you were having a good day. The baby was being good to their mama by not giving her any light headedness. That pleased him.

“Oh! Excuse me good sir.” He quickly said as he collided with someone stumbling out of the bar.

Turning in the direction in which the man fell, the man had sprawled.

“I am terribly sorry, sir. Thoughts had clouded my vision.”

He offered his hand. The man took it. He had a very firm grip.

“And drink had made my feet unsure of themselves.”

Their eyes met and chuckle had blossomed and was shared.

“Well, I must be on my way.” He gave the man a quick smile.

******

He had been right. His pleasure on being correct, gave him a flush of confidence. He needed it.

The boat after its journey groaned and creaked as it anchored at the dock.

He’d never breath the words into existence but fleeing had give him a thorn of discontent in his side. Logic, his heart told him he had made the correct decision. There was no doubt or second thoughts lingering in his heart.

Though there was a sliver of pain that sometimes cut deep as the thoughts, the memories of Courfeyrac or Grantaire or even small Gavroche or the elder Mabeuf paid him a visit. He glanced down at his scared hand that he used to lean against the wooden posts at the dock while he waited.

******

“Sir, I mean Officer Gerard, are you alright? I knew I shouldn’t have allowed you free of my arms this early.” The bar maid fluttered around him.

He dusted himself off, eyes narrowing as he watched the younger man walk away. He gave the barmaid who had been warming his bed a half smile.

“Do you know who that is my sweet cabbage?”

The woman glanced and smiled back at him. “Of course, I do my love.”

The woman dragged out that last word, love. He wasn’t quite sure how it made him feel. In the past, he’d backhand some for using it so casually. Yet, now It had been an age since anyone spoke of him in such a manner.

“That is Sir Julien. Newly arrived on our ground with a wife who is blossoming with life while he has the flair of a gentleman.”

With a tilt of her head he could see a tide of worry was over her.

“Is there something the matter? You would surely like him. He drinks and plays cards as well.”

He shook his head. “No but our paths did just crash and it left me curious. He seemed almost too polite for this region.”

“He sounds like you.” A giggle came from her. “Am I too polite too since you took a liking to my company?”

“Perhaps.”

********

“Sir, sir is that steady enough?”

A sharp voice took his attention away from the water that slapped against the wooden haul.

It was his mother. His heart leapt as his stomach churned. His feet ushered him over to where she would step foot.

“Mother?” All that he could possibly remained in his mouth.

Despite a tiredness having blanketed her usual refined and elegant appearance she smiled. “It took some arguing but I convinced your father to allow me passage to go and see you.”

“I did get my stubbornness from the two of you. What made him finally allow you?”

“Reason. Someone needs to keep an eye on the estate.”

“And despite him always being quite cold, you always brought some warmth from him however small.”

“It is my charm and wit that I feel blessed to have passed onto you, my son.”

******

With the occasional sniff from a handkerchief you finally were able to settle on eau de Cologne for Enjolras. You were not sure what he would think of it. But it did remind you of him. Memories, of how he had looked striding over to you with that white billowy shirt, those trousers and black shiny boots still stirred your heart.

“I will wrap this so it is ready when he returns.”

“Thank you.” You replied softly.

*****

The door jangled as you went to stand just outside the shop. The air with all of its scents had grown too heavy for you. Gently wrapped and tucked away in your reticule, the cologne was safe. You held the strings that

Shops, streets were different in England, you mused looking at your new surroundings, the urge to explore was strong.

Though a fluttering came from the baby as they shifted within you.

“Are you awake?” You whispered, gently patting your stomach.

The warmth of your love for them came over you. You were learning that you had to keep not only yourself safe but them as well. Waiting, for Enjolras’s return you took in the small street and other shops. Distantly, you could hear hushed voices with the occasional peel of laughter from opening and closing of a pub’s door.

You watched as Enjolras rounded the corner. As you watched he paused heavily against a wall. He looked as if something happened. Your heart squeezed hard. Not uttering a word you began to make your way over to him.

His eyes met yours as you neared. A few of his curls fell into his brow but didn’t hide the look you saw in them. It stole your breath.

******

The arrival of his mother excited him and worried him. He knew how she was rather particular with how she liked things. He knew the two of you had seemed complimentary of each other during those short moments at Oliver’s.

However, after the package from his father he would not expected this. It was not something, he particularly wanted to worry about. It was enough that he was keeping an ear open for the possible arrival of the French solider who was looking for revenge. He chewed on the inside of his cheek as he made his way back to you.

“Sir Julien, sir Julien.”

He resisted the urge to ignore the barmaid, calling to him. This was not the time to close himself off from all the new people he was meeting. He swallowed, stopping and turned towards her.

“Yes?”

She was breathless and red faced as she caught up with him. Her hands fluttered around her like birds as she found her breath.

“I’m sorry.” She muttered swallowing some breathes.

“It is ok. There was something you wanted?” The urge to get back to you grew.

“A man, like you. Sounding like you has been staying with me.”

A chill came over him, he tried not to shiver. “Like me?”

A broad, lopsided smile that only she could muster spread across her fleshy face as the flush of running over to him finally faded.

“Yes, sounds like you and also likes to play card games. You should come one night. I told him, you did too.”

He blinked. “You did.”

With the excited nod of her head, the bun that held her hair in place loosened some.

“I did. You two would get along. Both very charming.”

He had to get away and now, he needed air desperately.

“I will consider it.

“You will?”

“Yes! But now I must be off. Fare thee well.”

He heard her call the same and he nodded and made it around the corner just out of eye sight and slumped against a stone wall. He felt like what little bile was in his stomach could leave at any moment. He took several breaths to calm his racing heart and churning stomach.

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