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danielxrk · 6 years ago

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✞ SELF WRITTEN RAP * HEAT

( * mentioned, some very briefly: @rkxsungwoon @rkminhyun @rkkenta @rkpwj @haknyeonrk @rkjeongin @rkeunji @joohyunrk @yuzurk @rkyuri @hyojinrk @rkpjy @jacksxnrk @rkjeonghxn @rkyeji @rksuwoong @rktaeyang @rkmason )

it’s like daniel doesn’t breathe from the moment the judges return from their deliberations. it’s not like last season, at least not yet-- no personal feedback and eliminations, and considering the sheer number of contestants, it makes sense, even if he didn’t consider how it would happen. he holds kenta and minhyun’s hands, and he doesn’t know if it’s to aid them or himself. he’s more nervous for them. daniel doesn’t know if he’ll make it, but he doesn’t really need this show-- doesn’t have the same talents to show as the others. he already got his experience from last season. this is what he tells himself to calm his nerves, anyway, and to quell that growing greed and hunger: i want this. this time i want to win.

sungwoon’s name comes first-- a given. daniel would probably leave the competition if he continued to the second round without him, but they don’t know if he’ll even get that far yet. minhyun’s name comes next, and daniel squeezes his hand in acknowledgement. next it’s woojin, and daniel lets himself get his hopes up. can they all continue on together? kenta is the one he worries for most. he doesn’t know how long kenta and woojin have both been dancing, but he doesn’t think it’s been long, and woojin’s dancing seems a little sharper-- a little more powerful, even to daniel’s untrained eye. his grip on kenta’s hand tightens, and he doesn’t know if it’s for his friend’s sake or his own. then his name comes, and daniel exhales, and it takes a moment for it to sink in. when it does, he throws is arms over both minhyun and kenta’s shoulders as best as he can and shakes them out of excitement.

they’re all going on together. he tells himself he won’t be greedy and hope for more than this; two rounds with all of them is more than enough-- a blessing, an honor, a privilege. he doesn’t know if they’ll get more than that, but he’ll enjoy it while they can.

it takes a moment to reel himself in and listen as they explain the next round, and there’s a pit in his stomach mixed with some intrinsic motivation. competing in your best skill. his mind flashes back to that room on audition day, of last year especially-- and the way his resolve shook more and more with each singer, undoubtedly more talented. the performances today only confirmed that fact. he knows he improved since last year, but he also knows it’s not enough. he looks from minhyun to sungwoon subtly-- both dear friends, and better singers than him. he doesn’t want to compete with that, not just because he knows he can’t, but because he doesn’t want to risk scraping by by the skin of his teeth and stealing a spot from one of them.

the singing category will be more competitive. he knows this, and among all of that talent, surely he’ll be below the cutoff. is there anywhere he won’t be below the cutoff? dancing is out, obviously, so his mind wanders to rap. it’s a new skill for him, and one he knows he has no right to believe he can win in, yet there’s a part of him that wonders. if he can put up a fight, does he have a better chance there than singing, among less contestants-- with more spots available to them? he was eliminated last year because in a team among singers, he was clearly the worst. he doesn’t know if his growth is enough to prevent that again, and the last thing he wants to do is go out the same way. he didn’t come back to repeat history. at the very least, he wants to go down swinging.

his thought process is broken by sungwoon getting up, and claiming he's going to switch to rap. daniel's brain short-circuits, expression going completely blank. can you even rap? he overhears from someone in front of them, inevitably one of the people cheering through the entire show, and sungwoon demands someone beatbox for him, and daniel is just caught in the crossfire of this. sungwoon then proceeds to drop an incredibly fire freestyle (see: horrible, even though daniel kind of thinks it's cute.) by the end, he knows he's just kidding, but daniel is also on his feet.

sungwoon makes it clear it's a joke, and daniel laughs but--

"no, but i'm actually switching to rap," daniel says, only to be met with blank faces all around.

sungwoon's why goes unspoken, so daniel's voice drops low, only for him to hear: "i got eliminated when all i had to do was sing." that's enough for sungwoon to understand.

daniel turns back to the others, smile on his face. "don't worry, guys. i've got this."

narrator: he does not got this (yet)

it's not that he regrets his decision upon beginning preparation for his performance, it's just that...he wishes he was better. he wishes he was better at everything-- that his singing was even remotely remarkable so he had a chance there, that he had more natural rapping talent that emerged when he picked it up for trc's triple threat challenge, just for fun. he wants more, and he can't help but feel where he's lacking will become abundantly clear next episode. but what can he do but try his best? it doesn't stop him from doubting, and there are more than a few times he wishes he stuck with singing, with all of the songs in his back pocket that would suit him singing with his trusty guitar. rap? he has nothing.

haknyeon proves a big help, not just in cleaning up his rapping itself, but in helping him find songs. he helps daniel narrow down the song choices he picked out among the "khiphop" playlist he found on spotify, trying desperately to latch onto anything relatable that he could regurgitate on stage. there were rap songs he heard when he lived in vancouver too-- english, but none of them stood out as something he'd like to perform. by saturday, he's narrowed it down significantly, and has an inkling of an idea.

his dad calls him after the episode airs; apparently mina convinced him to watch it with her, and daniel doesn't know whether to feel relieved or not that he and his sister's silent agreement to never speak of his time on the mgas last year is broken now. all of his family knows how much he loves music now, so it's fine, right? still, there's more pressure. to his surprise, he isn't met with harshness; it's more you did well and you wrote that song? and i wish they showed more of it and even if we wish you would've done different, i'll be supporting you and remember, glorifying god is the most important thing. it's better than daniel expected, and it's not like he's wrong. he wants to show a different side of himself than he did last round, and that's partially why he chose rap, but he doesn't know how to really display that and remain true to himself, too.

he showed different sides of himself last season too, from singing a worship song out of panic at his first audition to...whatever he did for troublemaker. even if he's distanced himself from his mother, and the kind of organized religion he couldn't untie from her, his faith is still strong-- an unshakable and undeniable part of daniel at his core, and it feels like if he didn't show that on this competition it...wouldn't be right. if he believes what the bible says is true, that's his primary purpose in life, so shining the light on god on stage feels like the least he can do.

it's what compels him to delve into the world of christian rap, even if the lyrics of it all is in english. that's an important side of himself too, so he isn't opposed to rapping in english this round, even if the meaning would be lost on much of the audience. katie lee at least knows english, right? would her name be katie lee if she didn't? he can probably get away with it. he settles on five different ideas, but he's not content with the songs alone. he knows if he wants to stand out, or have any chance against these rappers better and more experienced than him, he has to do what he does best: write lyrics.

he hasn't ventured into the realm of writing raps before, but now's the time.

his intention at first is to rap part of the original song of whatever he chooses in the end, and write his own verse to finish out the song, or maybe to start it out-- he isn't sure yet, but then he thinks...is that enough? he starts venturing out into the land of instrumental beats. he reminds himself that he doesn't have much experience with rapping-- that it's greedy to think he can write a full rap himself and stand a chance, and yet...what does he have to set him apart other than this? he doesn't have remarkable skill. if he writes one verse on his own, he has the sliver of a chance to stand out, but if he does more...

maybe everyone will wonder if he's capable of performing anyone else's songs after two weeks of original content in a row, if he truly goes down this path. but if he makes it further than this, won't he have the chance to prove it? he might not get the chance to share his own words again for the entirety of the competition. if he makes it further, he'll show that too. he has enough songs he wants to cover that aren't his own, he just needs to show everything he has to show, and in the end, all he really has to show are...his own words.

if he's going to rap, it needs to have impact. he needs to make up for anywhere he lacks with something hard-hitting, and it needs to be in the rap itself, but the instrumental is important, too. that sets the tone for the entire performance, and he can't even begin to work on the lyrics without settling on that. what he is settled on: this is what he's doing. he's going to write his own rap.

that train of thought is how he somehow ends up listening to girl groups-- entirely unfamiliar territory for daniel, outside of eclipse, whom he recently discovered and somewhat likes thanks to chase me. he knows luxe is that group sungwoon likes, or something, and k.arma is that group jeongin likes, but he hasn't listened to either of them before. he finds himself drifting to their instrumentals naturally, and he thinks...what better way to stand out than to rap over a girl group's instrumental? it'll be shocking in general, especially from someone like daniel, who seemed so trapped in the mold of singer-songwriter and guy in a metal band. i feel good is too fast, even for someone surprisingly capable of rapping at high speeds for how long he's been rapping. he can't wrap his head around how he would even begin to rap over news. every night is way more in the realm of possibility, but he isn't really sure if it suits what he wants. what does he want? a mystery. he ventures further into girl groups-- more obscure ones, ones he's never heard of, and he finds a song with a good instrumental, and luckily, when he searches for the instrumental itself, it appears.

next, his confidence wavers, and he bobbles back and forth on whether to use an existing rap song as his framework-- only writing a verse himself, or if he wants to go the full nine yards. he's painfully aware of the time he's wasting with each passing hour, so he enlists the help of empty enigma in deciding. kenta encourages him to rap over another beat, claiming daniel's good sense of rhythm will be able to make it sound cool, and if that wasn't enough, in asking, it becomes clear what daniel hopes they'll say. maybe he just needed an extra confidence boost to actually do this.

he spends the next days with his time equally spent between his own home and the empty enigma apartment, scrawling lyrics into his notebook that holds countless songs, well-worn. there, he raps them quietly to himself, under his breath. it's mostly just him, sungwoon and minhyun here, woojin and kenta out practicing their dancing in more appropriate places, inevitably. it doesn't stop him from pestering them all over which version of his lyrics sound better. (if jealousy is just your fate i guess that might be fine too or if jealousy is how you're made i guess that might be fine too?) but he doesn't rap much of it out loud, preferring to leave it as a surprise for the day of his performance, but they probably hear enough bits and pieces to add it all up into the whole song, anyway. in his own apartment, rapping his written lines over and over again as he goes about his daily routine until they're seared into his memory and flow off of his tongue as close to second nature as possible.

he needs all the help standing out this round that he can get. now he just needs to make sure it's good.

he trails into the venue after the rest of his bandmates, just like before, and something about the reduced number of chairs makes his stomach feel sick. it's a reminder that even if they all survived to this round, their chances of doing so again grow slimmer and slimmer, as that number of chairs lessens. their group hesitates, searching for somewhere to sit, and daniel and sungwoon make eye contact in a silent understanding that they don't want to sit near the people they sat with last episode. "hey, let's go sit over here!" daniel suggests good naturedly, leading them to the other side of the stage, and they take a seat in the same row as they did before, in a completely different area than previously.

sungwoon sits down first. "i'm sitting next to you this time," daniel says, no room for argument, and sits down right beside him. kenta sits in the seat next to him again, woojin next to him, minhyun on the end beside sungwoon, and that puts daniel right in the middle. it's what he deserves, for how much emotional support he's going to need for this round. much to daniel's relief, eunji's group sits where they sat last time, well away from daniel and the rest of empty enigma, and he feels some of the tension in his shoulders fade. as close as he is to joohyun, it's probably better they don't sit together too, if only for sungwoon's sake (and so daniel can hold his hand as long as he wants, guilt-free.)

he watches as more contestants fill in, the seats growing full quickly, but the ones in front of them remain open. that doesn't last for long. daniel watches in sheer and utter horror as the people he recognizes from the loud and overwhelming row in front of them from last round and kenta, of all things, motions them over. daniel and sungwoon turn, a staring-into-the-camera-like-they're-on-the-office moment, but staring at each other instead, and daniel sees the moment where sungwoon really considers getting up and leaving the rest of them by themselves to deal with this. really, valid reaction. maybe daniel could follow him, and sungwoon alone would be all the support he needs for this; he acknowledges that as a very likely reality, but it doesn't mean he wants to leave the others. "don't leave me with them," he whispers, eyes pleading, hand on his arm to make sure he can't so easily get away, and that seems to do the trick.

as if that wasn't bad enough, a girl he recognizes as yena comes over and starts talking to kenta, and-- actually, this part isn't so bad. he says hi to her with a smile, otherwise observing their conversation quietly, always the better listener than conversationalist. he knows yena, though-- met her at a festival a while ago and maybe...met her as cameo. that part, he doesn't entirely remember. she takes her leave soon enough.

the performances start up more quickly this time, and he supposes that makes sense with half the contestants. they'll start with the singers. that gives daniel some time to prepare-- or to sit through countless people better than him and psych himself out, depending on your perspective. he tries to distract himself with the performances to calm his nerves, but he reaches for sungwoon's hand almost as soon as they begin, and he doesn't let go. in it he finds comfort-- leverage, stability, something a little grounding that brings his head and flying thoughts back down to earth.

yena performs first, and she's charming, as he remembers her being. her voice isn't the best, and he can relate, but she still makes a nice performance, and he hopes he'll be able to do the same for the rap category. there's another performer he doesn't recognize, and then it's sungwoon's turn before he knows it. he squeezes his hand in encouragement, and smiles up at him as he stands. this time feels different than last round; he's less dazed and distant, and thinks he won't be as caught off guard, unless sungwoon decides to serenade him without him knowing again-- can he call it that? is that what it was? when sungwoon takes to the stage, daniel feels like those walls that they've been chipping away at since the end of march might finally be coming down. as always, sungwoon does well-- voice always prevailing above everything, powerful over any background noise, commanding all attention. if it's not that, it's his presence, and both go together to create an incredible performer. he doesn't even have to be doing anything, he can just stand there and sing. daniel wishes he could do that. it's just one of the many things daniel admires him for, and he always has, from the moment he met him. sungwoon's two minutes pass too quickly, and the brief respite daniel found suspended in his voice ends with it.

sungwoon returns, and when he does, daniel narrows his eyes. what the hell is he carrying? kenta catches on before daniel does-- ah, yes, shoelifts. daniel can't relate. "what...happened?" daniel asks. how did his shoelifts get from...his shoes to his hands? he just looks back and forth from hi to kenta wildly as the ensuing argument happens, eyes ever widening, countless words he could say on the tip of his tongue but never coming out as the conversation barrels on. "you're both--" not that short, he wants to say, but as a certified tall person, he has no right, and he also realizes he doesn't know how often he's seen them without insoles. he feels oddly betrayed by this realization suddenly, and sungwoon is hollering about seeing kenta's feet and kenta is talking about makeup on feet and daniel blinks in utter despaired confusion. "can we stop talking about feet.." he mutters sadly, and thank god, they do.

once they finally settle down, daniel utters a quiet "you did well," to sungwoon, and squeezes his hand one more time. he retracts it quickly though, out of fear of overdoing it, or making his attachment too obvious, or annoying him, or something else he probably has no reason to worry about but will anyway, as always. his hand is sweaty anyway. he rubs it on his pants, as subtly as he can.

a girl sings next, and daniel vaguely recognizes her-- maybe these performers stuck in his head more than he thought after all. minhyun is up next though; he knows this because he's been keeping track in alphabetical order as best as he can. if he's not up next it's soon, and he's just as quickly proven right. he leans forward far enough just to look at him and say, "good luck minhyun hyung!" somehow, he's surprised by minhyun's talent again, as he is each time. maybe he keeps getting better, or maybe he can't dissociate minhyun as manager of the band, always someone behind the scenes instead of someone deserving of the stage, and capable of filling one all by himself. he likes watching him, though, and he wonders if minhyun feels the same as he did last year: like the mgas are showing him he really does have a place on stage.

they need to get through several singers after that, and daniel zones in and out-- in for yuri, who stood out to him last round, and to hyojin, his unexpected collaboration partner, and in for jinyoung, whose performance he liked last time and who seems...vaguely familiar? he tries to pay attention to jackson too, if only for rockstar solidarity, and by then, the singers are already finished. somehow, it simultaneously went faster and slower than he expected, like some kind of time warp. he almost says something like you already performed, so now you get to be bored instead of nervous, to sungwoon, but becomes keenly aware of the cameras and dangling microphones and how unkindly that might paint him, so quickly decides against it.

besides, now that dancers are up, he has a new stake in this. joohyun starts off, so it's with a bang, naturally, and daniel finds himself far more nervous watching her now than last round, knowing she's dancing with an injury. he's on the edge of his seat the entire time, expression probably set in something close to a grimace, but when he realizes, he tries to control it, because that won't show well on camera either. then it happens: she stumbles, and his heart drops, and that grimace is back on his face, justifiably so, and he prays she makes it through safely from now on. he should've prayed for her from the start. he should've prayed for all of them.

she makes it through-- finishes as strong as she can, but daniel knows joohyun, and knows she'll be devastated. part of him thinks this is his fault; he didn't shut down her idea of joining the show again. he wanted her here with him, even if it wasn't the best for her, and now she's suffering for it. when she steps off stage, he stands up on instinct, without much thought, craning his neck to see her on the other side of the stage-- to make sure she's okay. he wants to do something. in his heart, he wants to run over to her to check for himself, to see if he can do anything to help. he doesn't even know if mnet will let him leave his seat, or if he'll only make things worse, but sungwoon says, "go check to see if she's okay," from beside him, and it's like that releases him to. he nods, and lets his feet carry him to her side, where he pulls her into a hug as soon as he can, suddenly immune to eunji's presence and everything else. "you did the best you could," he whispers, still lingering in the hug. "you're really brave and i wish i could be more like you." he knows he can't stay too long, so he pulls away, ruffles her hair, and just watches her for a moment. he nods at her, slowly, some silent message exchanged between them: i know you. you're strong and you can get through this. she nods back.

he heads back to his seat, and his eyes still drift back to joohyun across the stage from him once he's seated. he accidentally meets the gaze of the man beside her-- one of the people he saw comforting joohyun before he could. daniel doesn't remember his name, but his eyes bore into him so fiercely that something about it brings a chill to his blood, so he looks away.

daniel expects to dissociate through the dancers, if only because he couldn't tell the difference between dancers' talent if it smacked him in the face, but his cousin, yeji, performs early, and eunji after that. he feels too guilty to even watch eunji, even if he wants to, so he stares, unfocused, through the chair in front of him, painstakingly, through her full performance. he pays a little more attention to the others, but it all blurs together until he hears suwoong's name called, and he perks up, if only because he expects this to be interesting after trot ring ding dong. he isn't disappointed.

woojin is next up, and he does a silent "fighting" gesture to his friend as he stands up, even if he doesn't even know if woojin saw it. when woojin takes to the stage, daniel still can't believe he didn't even know woojin could dance. he's this good and daniel didn't even know. what did daniel miss? did woojin keep it that under wraps or is he just stupid? a mystery. when in doubt, assume both. he claps for him enthusiastically when he steps off stage, and makes sure to tell him he did a good job, too. kenta's performance is up next, and daniel somewhat roughly pats his back to send him off, big smile on his face, and daniel watches him just as intently. it's a performance that really suits kenta, more than he thought his last one did, truthfully, and he's so thankful he gets to show this side of him on the competition at least once. it's so sincerely kenta that it's only appropriate.

he pays attention to taeyang's performance after too, a little shocked by how many contestants in this show he actually knows-- a little worried about how painful eliminations will be from here on out. sometime-- maybe at the end of the dancers, or the beginning of the rappers --daniel's hand finds sungwoon again with the resurgence of his nerves. mason is in rap, of all things, and daniel didn't anticipate that much, for some reason. he's so good. daniel both has goosebumps because of the impactfulness of the performance and because he's suddenly terrified. when it ends, he looks over at sungwoon pointedly-- meaningfully, but eyes completely devoid of life. how do i follow that? still, he finds something comforting in sungwoon's gaze, and when he looks away, he lets out a long exhale and tries to recenter himself, still clutching sungwoon's hand like a lifeline.

he spends the rest of the rappers preceding him doing deep breathing exercises and detaching from this current plane of existence, making the executive decision that scoping out the competition before he performs will only cause his confidence to plummet. he hears their instrumentals start and stop in the background-- becomes distinctly aware of performances passing by --and he knows he should be about in the middle, realistically. he doesn't know the names of all of these rappers, but k is in the middle of the alphabet, and it seems like there are a lot of choi's. he spends much of his time leaning just a little bit forward, head hanging so he can stare at the ground instead of the stage, but he still holds on to sungwoon's hand. his gaze starts to drift toward sungwoon even more, like he's waiting for him to say something. he wants this to feel the way it does before empty enigma shows-- that confidence and adrenaline, that certainty that he was born to do this, that...not being alone. he half wants sungwoon to flirt with him, that trademark of squall and cameo that anchored him to the moment and who he needed to be before stepping on stage more than he realized, like that'll awaken something stronger in him. he looks at him again, like maybe he'll get the hint, slip him something small and unassuming, but his name is up too quickly.

yes, he needs something bigger than himself: an alter ego or divine intervention, so as he walks toward the stage, he prays. please give me confidence. remind me of all my words, help me stay on beat, calm my nerves. help me to do what you want me to do. let's do this.

they hand him the microphone once he steps on stage, and he bows, grin stretching across his face on instinct. he bows first to the crowd, then to the judges. "i'm kang daniel," he introduces himself on this stage for the second time. "and i'll be rapping for you. ah-- you already know that," he realizes, and laughs at himself, which also appears to be a common theme. "this is an original rap, and i...apologize in advance." smile fades to something a little more cheeky. he'll just leave it at that.

he turns around, back to the audience and the cameras, and pulls up his hood. his beat begins, and he has no time to waste.

i’m here with a new skill since the last time

i know i’m not the best; for now i’ve got a few rhymes

i only have two minutes but won’t start out with my best lines

i saved the best for last the way this beat climbs

he didn't actually write this portion of his lyrics first-- he wrote them all out of order, based on whatever popped into his head, then revised and rearranged. this part in particular is meant to be a buildup to the rest, as stated, but also as a build up for his confidence: a sign of things to come and a chance to be underestimated by the audience so his later lyrics pack the punch he wants them to. shades of season four's daniel: timid, unassuming, in over his head. he's not that daniel anymore, and he's about to prove it.

god told me to be strong for he is with me

so with your eyes on me i’ll pretend i don’t feel scrutiny

this battle isn’t mine, he’ll defeat every enemy

and i’ll still love you anyway, proverbs 24:17

if you want to live through this you better be holy

and be prepared to bow down, every knee

so go ahead and tear me up

i’ve already heard enough

every criticism is like my heart’s handcuff

the buildup of the beat kicks in halfway through this part, and the words roll off of his tongue quickly, like he practiced time after time, over and over until his tongue felt strange in his mouth. he makes use of the stage now, gestures along with the rap, nerves ebbing and dissipating entirely. he means all of this more than any rap he could've covered. this: a reference to his faith, still intrinsic to his nature, but more obvious last season given the song he performed for his first audition in a panic. maybe he added this because of what his dad said: make sure to glorify god. he knows he can't step on this stage within his own power, so this is a shout out to the one that really makes it all possible-- plus a little self-righteousness, of course, because who wants to hear a rap without confidence? when he says bow down he makes the gesture with his free hand: vertical to horizontal, but this is still the build up of his confidence. in this is still the admission that the criticism-- not just from the mgas, but from his entire life --still gets to him. it's a part of him now.

the drum kicks in, the beat builds up and up, and leads him into what may be his favorite set of lines:

i can be your idol rapper

i can be your firecracker

i can just stay quiet because my opinion never matters

i can work myself to death

i can give up my success

but i can never be enough

an ode to his willingness to be whatever anyone else wants him to be-- to the fire in him, from cameo or otherwise, to his mother's if you have nothing nice to say don't say anything at all, to sacrifice upon sacrifice upon sacrifice, and the end result: that unshakable feeling of unworthiness.

then the beat drops.

i have less experience

but i can already spit

heat, heat

competition has departed

i’m only just getting started

heat, heat

is my talent now surprising?

temperature is always rising

heat, heat

this year i have passion

i’m ready to cash in

heat, heat

heat, said in english. in the end, it's all about that fire. he said it in his thanks to for between fear and faith: thank you to my parents for raising me well and not supporting me doing music so i would know how much this really meant to me, and so i could take the fire that lit in me and put it into this album. there's so much that lit a fire in him that he couldn't put into this rap, but it fuels him. as much as he brags, however, there's something a little subdued about heat, like it's not quite a fire yet-- the feeling it gives off, but not the flame-- something with room to grow into something greater, just like him. he makes use of the stage, refusing to just stand in the middle, but playing to the crowd, and now that he begun, it feels natural, and it feels the same: that exchange of energy, between cameo and fans in an underground club, between daniel and his fellow contestants in the mga venue. he waves his free hand up and down, encouraging the audience to do the same like any decent performer at a concert-- reaches out like he's about to touch one of the contestant's hands, but they're too far out of reach, so he turns and half-skips across the stage.

the beat stays strong and ushers in the second verse, and when his bragging truly begins, and by this point in the song, he's sufficiently grown into it.

i’m not supposed to do this so my mom won’t even watch me

music isn’t good enough, disappointment to the family

but you’ll still catch me on the stage, bass riffs every weekend

i deserve a world tour, self-made songs, best friends

it's all true, all self explanatory, and when he gets to the best friends part, he intentionally points to empty enigma on their side of the stage and smiles, though there's a bite to it. he embraces it-- lets cameo leak into this performance, because with all secrets exposed, there's no need to keep anything separate anymore. despite their differences, they're the same, and this performance requires more attitude than daniel was ever capable of on his own.

our god is greater, shaky voice, season four

now i’m back on every site, certified uproar

you’re tired of my face, right?

i’m too weak, i’m too bad, won’t put up a fight, right?

four fingers held up four season four, and a reference to his first abysmal, pathetic audition that still got him into the competition somehow, and he bounces across the stage, not unlike the way he does at empty enigma's shows. when he asks his questions, he smirks-- pauses in his movements briefly to put a hand on his hips, then nods toward tiger jk at the end before he picks up where he left off, still animated. (maybe he's out of breath-- maybe just a little. he didn't account for how active he'd be on stage during his practice, but he hopes his energy and commitment to the performance makes up for anywhere he lacks.)

he circles around the stage, searching for somewhere to land-- ends up right back in front of empty enigma, so he crouches down and raps to the row in front of them. who's loud now? you better cheer for me too.

you don’t even know that cameo is in my back pocket

bring the best of both and watch my album sales skyrocket

you wish fans would scream your name and buy your merch like mine do

if jealousy is just your fate, i guess that might be fine too

this goes out to cameo; he deserves his own lines. without him-- the lie he was crafted out of, the character and beast of his own he grew into, the spirit he carries with him on stage --none of this would've been possible. without cameo, there would be no daniel in empty enigma, none of his best friends, none of this newfound passion, none of this joy, and even if his identity is revealed now, and he puts cameo to a certain kind of death, he'll always be thankful for him and what he represented. (not yet, he thinks. he'll keep him around for a little bit longer.)

he points to empty enigma again, then stands up and works his way toward the other side of the stage. oh yeah, those increased album sales would be nice too. stream between fear and faith on melon.

i wrote 40 songs this year; it’s fine if you can’t beat me

write bad comments, feel like how i’ll win this-- free

you can hate me but i’m still right here on your tv

and i’ll still get more screentime than your faves, so watch me

they're the final lines, and the ones meant to pack the biggest punch, hence their position at the end: perpetual build up in his confidence so he can finally say through rap what he'd never be bold enough to in person. he doesn't really mean it, but what's a rap if not delivered with confidence, even when you don't mean it, or it's unwarranted? he hopes now, his audience is at least a little impressed with his lyrics, even if they aren't with his rap itself: tone nothing special, only good for rapping fast and little else. he doesn't think about it now. instead, he uses the signature crazy hand gesture near his head and turns in a circle to face away from the audience again, only to spin out for the return of the final chorus.

i have less experience

but i can already spit

heat, heat

competition has departed

i’m only just getting started

heat, heat

is my talent now surprising?

temperature is always rising

heat, heat

this year i have passion

i’m ready to cash in

heat, heat

he soaks in the final moments: this energy, this electricity, and doesn't let himself think about how this hit, or what people think. the daniel in this moment doesn't care about that. all he focuses on is ending strong, and making sure he puts on a good show until the very end, because now, that's more important to him than showing off his skills-- more important than anything. heat, heat, and then it's over.

he bursts into a smile as soon as it is, and bows, twice once more, before handing his mic off. he practically bounds off stage, back to his seat, giving high fives to anyone that will accept one on his way back, and maybe, just maybe, it's fire after all.

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