#leaving me to just restart the film again and again and again

[hysteria-things]

need a rough chris smut that’s kinda like the one u wrote for matt. that movie one where he kept restarting it?

maybe reader has been teasing chris all day leaving him super super needy but not needy in the way where he becomes subby, he gets tired of it and when they’re alone he puts her in her place and just edges her over and over again so she knows how he feels.

and he gets so turned on by her crying and shit and the more she does and begs him to cum the more he edges her

hes just a lil meanie :33!

RULE BREAKER

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: dom!chris x reader

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: you’ve been such a tease all day, and chris is starting to get fed up. later that night he comes up with a plan… one that you’re not fond of.

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: SMUTTY SMUT, swearing, teasing, vibrator, orgasm denial, edging, dacryphilia, begging, spanking, overstimulation, choking, degradation, p in v, stomach bulge, unprotected sex (don’t be silly!)

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 1,277

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: chris is mean in this sorry not sorry😇

sorry it took so long :(

chris isn’t fond of the game that you’re playing. you’re acting oblivious to it, but he knows damn well what you’re doing.

you and the triplets are on a target trip right now, and the two of you are at a different section of the store.

“should i get this?” you ask innocently, bending down in front of him to pick up a product that you certainly don’t need off the bottom shelf. wiggling your ass a smidge, he stares at you unamused.

you sigh, backing up into him and arching slightly. “or what about this one?” you stand on your tippy toes to grab another useless item.

he groans because when you reached up, your ass rubbed against his crotch. he grips onto your hips and pulls you closer. “cut it out.”

“cut what out?” you pout, looking at him with those fuck me eyes you’ve been giving him all damn day.

when he doesn’t answer, you sigh and rotate your body. “let’s check out.”

before walking away, he flinches once you grab onto his hard-on.

he was quiet the whole ride back to their house. matt is dropping you off since you’re sleeping over, but they’re going to film first. “thanks matt!” you exclaim, getting out of the backseat.

“i need to run inside real quick.” chris says, grabbing the target bag and following behind you.

once he shuts the door, you turn to face him. he yanks a box out of the bag and throws the bag somewhere. your eyes widen.

it’s one of those vibrators that one controls from their phone. you don’t even know when he picked it out.

he unboxes it and takes it out, pulling you to him by the waistband. you gulp, your eyes not falling from the toy. “when—”

“shut your mouth.”

you immediately close it, letting him reach down into your underwear to put the vibe in. you bite your tongue at the feeling.

he points his finger at you. “i’m going to go film a video. you are going to stay here. don’t fucking touch it, and don’t you dare cum. if i find out you’re going to be in big trouble, you understand me?”

“yes,” you mumble, looking down at your feet.

he grabs your jaw and forces you to look at him. “what?”

“yes,” you repeat in a higher tone. he grins, kissing you on the cheek before heading out the door.

you’re so fucked.

you roam around the kitchen aimlessly, looking for a snack. it started as a gentle rhythmic feeling, like when you were on the couch watching a movie before and felt the vibration start between your thighs.

currently, nothing is happening, but chris has been edging you for about an hour now.

you tap on your phone that’s on the counter before you feel the most intense vibration yet, possibly on the max setting.

knuckles white as you grip tightly on the counter, your head falls between your shoulders with a loud moan.

you start humping the toy as if that’ll do you a favor. it doesn’t, but the vibration is so intense that your legs start to quiver.

a chance to breathe comes along when it stops, but it doesn’t take long for it to start up again.

despite your grip, you almost tumble to the ground. you squeal uncontrollably, the knot in your stomach forming like it has been all this time.

it’s too late to stop the knot from snapping, sighing in relief when your orgasm drips down your legs.

you thought you were fucked before, but now you’re really fucked.

chris fiddles with the controls on his phone, his brother’s voices blocked out around him. “can you get off the damn phone and listen?” nick asks annoyed, tapping his brother on the shoulder to gain his attention.

“hold on,” he replies, then he gets a text from you.

your leg bounces as you sit on chris’s bed, the door swinging open just moments later. he didn’t touch the vibe once you texted him, and it freaks you out even more. you look at him with wide eyes and he joins you. “take it out.” he demands, referring to the toy that’s still inside you.

you throw it somewhere on the floor, and when you do, chris yanks you by the back of the neck to pull you over his lap.

he quite literally tears off your leggings, and before you can react, a hand makes rough contact with your right asscheek.

you jolt while his hand meets your left one this time. “funny to assume that you can tease me all day and get away with it.” right. “but you were wrong.” left.

“it was an acc—” you cry out of pain when he spanks you again.

“be quiet,” he says through gritted teeth, spanking you so many times that your ass turns red and is tingling. he doesn’t care if his brothers can hear. there’s only one thing on his mind, and that is to punish you.

tears well up in your eyes, your arousal glistening on your pussy.

when he’s done, he throws you back flat onto the bed. you gulp when he unbuckles his pants.

you feel his body dip into the bed, hovering over you. the chain he’s wearing dangles freely above your face. “ch—”

“do you just not fucking listen?” he curses, rubbing his tip teasingly at your entrance. maybe you should shut up.

he has no problem sliding into you, and the moment he does you groan. he wastes no time to plow into you, arching your back the deeper he gets.

you start to lift your head from the pleasure, but he wraps his hand around your neck to push it down. broken moans escape your lips, your eyes fluttering back with each thrust.

chris grunts, loving the way your eyes fill with tears. “i’m gonna—”

“absolutely not,” he says, lifting your legs so they rest on his shoulders. this new angle doesn’t help with the feeling in your tummy. “hold it, slut. doesn’t feel good, does it? huh?”

at the last word, he pulls out and slams back into you. your cry out, your bottom lip quivering.

your hands scratch at his chest, silently begging for release. it sucks though, because you know he won’t give you one anytime soon.

“ple-ease.” you beg. “p-please. i need to—”

you’re cut off when he starts to hit your cervix, the bulge of his cock forming in your stomach. he smirks menacingly, taking his unoccupied hand and pressing it onto the bulge.

“feel how deep i am?” he questions, but your head is leaned back with whimpers leaving your mouth. your legs start to shake, being too far gone in the pleasure.

squelching noises and the slap of his hips on your ass bounce off the walls, along with your noises. “please, please, please.” you sob, your g-spot getting hit over and over again.

“no. don’t make me say it again, slut.” he says, getting more turned on by the tears streaming down your face. “this is what you wanted, no? you wanted to be fucked like a whore, and that’s what i’m doing.”

when you start clenching repeatedly around him, the feeling makes him shoot his ropes of cum inside you. he grunts, releasing his grip from your throat.

you inhale sharply, but then he pulls out of you. he shrugs smugly when you look at him with a plea.

“but—”

“you broke one of the rules i gave you, ma.” he walks by your head to wipe the tears from your face. “don’t pull shit like that again.”

𝐭𝐚𝐠 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭!

@bunbunbl0gs @lexisecretaccx @thy-mission @angelic-sturniolos111 @sophssturn @mattsneezing @janiellasblog @blahbel668 @meg-sturniolo @hearts4chris @mattslolita @sturnbaby @imwetforyourmom @tillies33ssss @sturnifyed @mayhem-72 @ripmattitude @p1xieswrld @alorsxsturn @txssvx @sttzee @multiluvr @delilahprentiss @matthewsspecial @sturnolio-luvs @sturniolho @suga-daddy-69 @tworosesblackthorn @luckistar-posts @gnxosblog @junnniiieee07 @sturnioloslurps @tylerthecreatorsrealwife @flowerxbunnie @imaslut4kehlani @sturniolosandmoree @hertvgirl @whoreforchrissturniolo @r4iyaa @sturniolotriplettoplover @mattybswife @freshsturns @loverrsposts @saturncanyon @elliesturniolo1 @tpvmz @user283926392 @lalalands86 @sukiipjs

[1pepsiboy]

Just Like A Movie (Matt Sturniolo fluff)

Description: After a morning of fliming, Matt wants to enjoy fall activites with his girlfriend (reader). Inspired the song by the Wallows and Matt's love for fall time.

Word count: 1.4K

Warnings: None, just fluffy and silly Matt!

A/N: This is my first Matt writing, so sorry if it's not totally accurate! Lol I do requests! Currently anything Chris, Matt, Nick, and Colby!

----

Matt, Chris, and Nick were filming a guess 21 different halloween candies challenge. You sat on the couch behind the camera, scrolling through your phone but periodically looked up to glance at your boyfriend. Who would cheese when you did. Sometimes you'd make a silly face or comment, distracting him enough they'd have to restart part of the segment. Finally, they finish and Matt was the one closest to getting them all right. It wasn't surprising since he'd won guessing 21 different drinks.

Matt makes his way to the couch and wrapped his arms around you immediately. He nustles his head into your shoulder for a couple minutes and you run your fingertips up and down his back. Then he gives you a quick peck on the lips, mostly because Nick and Chris were still in the kitchen and they would make jokes about it.

You lick your lips and furrow your brows. "Hmm... I taste Snickers? No, Reese's?"

"(y/n)!" Matt whines lightly.

"Wait, wait, wait." You kiss his soft lips again. "It's Kitkat!"

A giggle escapes Matt and he lightly rolls his blue eyes. "Can we go do fall things, babe? Get away from those idiots over there. I've had enough of them today."

Nick flips him off as Chris fake laughs and makes a face. "So unoriginal Matt."

Now you roll your eyes. "Let's leave these losers to their lame things."

----

"I can drive if you want, babe," you suggest as you make it out the door after Matt changed his outfit to fit the vibe more. It's early afternoon now and barely a breeze to make it feel like a real fall day.

He shoots you a side smile and unclips the keys from his jean beltloop. "No, that's okay, I don't mind."

The two of you get comfortable in the front seats, starting up the recent playlist you created.

"Where to first?" you ask.

"What about... apple patch? Wait, I mean pumpkin picking... Fuck, I mean apple picking and then a pumpkin patch."

You reach out and lace your fingers with his. "I'd love to go to an apple patch and pumpkin picking. Maybe hot cocoa after?"

He nods and you put in the directions for the nearest apple picking farm. The two of you sing along. And you couldn't help pointing out people going about their daily lives. It takes up most of your conversation before you arrive at the farm.

Matt locks the car before he clips them back on the their loop and takes your hand. The apple farm was free to anyone, but they had a jar and square for donations/tips. You take out your card for them to do a $5 donation, and Matt doubles the amount.

You take a small basket and pull him over to one of the trees. Unfortunately most of the reachable ones were picked. But both of you still attempt to get one or two by running and jumping. You know you look like idiots, however you didn't care.

Matt gets a video of you as you finally acquire an apple and show it triumphantly. "That's right. No tree is a match for me! This apple is my bitch." You bite a chunk of the crispy green apple.

Matt laughs. "Babe, we're supposed to save them to make caramel apples!"

Your eyes go wide and you laugh as you chew it to a point you could speak. "Sorry, I can get another one."

He slips his phone back into his pocket as he shakes his head. "Let's try a different tree.

The second tree was a similar situation despite it just being on the brink of fall. There were a lot of early birds.

This time you get a story of Matt snagging two apples and he tries to not show how out of breath he is. "Ahh! Hah! I got some."

The two of you try two more trees and manage to get a few more.

There was a station for you to either bag them right away or make them caramel or chocolate covered before leaving. You spend far too long deciding on how many should be caramel and chocolate, and what toppings should be on them. You think of each brother and friend that'll want one. By the end, there's only one left and neither of you made one for yourselves.

"You choose," Matt says, kissing your cheek.

With creative intuition, you make it half and half, then smear all sorts of toppings on it and present it. Matt rests his hand on top of yours and takes a bite out of it.

"Mm..." he nods and runs a half through his hair, most of falling back in place. "I like what you did with the caramel and chocolate."

You take your own, attempting to lick the excess off around your mouth. "Delicious."

Your next stop was at a nearby pumpkin patch, which was also a little picked over. But there were still enough to enjoy and walk around a little bit. You pick up a few of the biggest ones you could find to get photos with.

Matt pulls you in for a selfie. His eyes squint as the sun is directly in your eyes and fumbles backwards. This causes him to run into a bundle of baby pumpkins and his butt lands on top of the stems.

"Fucking shit!" He groans as he holds onto his ass and rolls over on the ground.

You hold back a laugh and help him up. He paces back and forth a couple times.

"I'm done with the pumpkins," he sulks.

"Let's get hot cocoa to make it all better," you baby, jutting out your bottom lip.

He tries not to laugh but it didn't work.

----

You enjoy a small walk as you sip on hot cocoa, the sun starts to go down. You hold the to-go cup tightly between your palms in the hopes to warm up your hands. You forgot to bring any sort of warm layer. Once the sun is gone, it feels like fall now.

Matt shoots you a concerned look. "Are you cold, babe?"

"A little, yeah," you laugh under your breath.

"Here, wear my sweater, (y/n)."

"No, it's fine."

It's too late, he already took his jacket off and pulls the vintage sweater over his head. You take the sweater and tug it over your short sleeve tee. The warmth of the material and from him wearing it all afternoon engulfs your entire body. It sends shivers down your spine from the temperature adjustment.

Matt has his jacket back on and wraps his arms around you, rubbing his hands up and down your arms. He kisses the crook of your neck. "Better?"

"Absolutely."

The two of you reminisce on your adventures of the day. Ultimately, though, it leads back to a few of the couples around you in the park. One were unashamedly having a full on make out session underneath a tree. Another were taking cutesy photos in matching outfits.

"You'll never catch us doing that," Matt comments.

You raise your eyebrows at him. "Did you forget the matching pj pants we had for christmas last year?"

"That doesn't count," he scoffs lightly. "It was only pants. I mean, like, top, pants, accessories, the whole fit. It's just cringy."

You giggle. "Whatever you say, Matty B."

"It is! Are you saying you want to do that?" He sips on his hot cocoa. "Cause that might be a deal breaker."

"Not seriously. More in an ironic way. Like those people on tiktok doing the 80s style photoshoots at JcPenny. Now that would be fun and not cringy!"

He shook his head. "No, nope."

"Come on!" you argue. "Think about the memories we could make!"

"Absolutely not, it would be embarrasing."

You roll your eyes. "That's kind of the point, babe."

"Still," he retorts.

"Fine." You sigh lightly. "I'll just ask Chris to do it with me. He won't care."

Matt shrugs, finishing the last of his drink, and tosses it into the nearest trash can. "Okay, you two have fun with that."

"We will." You do the same with your drink.

You sense Matt's a little down now and force him into a hug. "Thanks for today, babe. You're the best."

He falls into your body more and lets out a deep breath. "Any time, (y/n)."

[writing-wh0re]

A/N: Hey Hey!Soo I'm kinda back?

I'm thinking of reopening my requests, starting my inbox fresh and letting new ideas come into play. Might restart my tag list as well, what do we think?

I've recently gotten into Anime and wow, it's an amazing world. I'm thinking of creating a post full of the characters I write for. Plus some of the original characters I write for.

I would love feedback on this Au idea! Would love to explore some Au ideas with other chatacters as well.

Any and all feedback is appriciated, likes are great but reblogs are golden.

| | | |

Champagne Kissed Lips

Adult Film Star AU Smut - Minors DNI.

Namani Kento x Fem!Reader x Satoru Gojo

Words: 3,301

Warnings: Smut 18+, Daddy Kink, Oral (Male and Female giving and receiving), Unprotected Sex, Vaginal Intercourse, Threesome, Slight Choking, Explicit Language, Alcohol and mention of smoking.

I hope you enjoy it!!

| | | |

University was a drag, class after class, stress after stress, bill after bill. It wasn’t like the movies and it wasn’t something I wouldn’t consider doing again.

I walk through the campus towards my dorm room, hoping my roommate Nova isn’t home as I know her energy will increase my oncoming headache.

“Your home! I have a quick question and want zero judgment from you.” Nova beams, bouncing over to me as I sling my bag onto the chair beside my desk.

“Shoot” I weakly smile, hoping to have silence shortly.

“So as we both know, life is expensive and let's be real, we’re both struggling.”

I giggle slightly, nodding along with Nova, slightly intrigued by where this conversation is going.

“Anyway, I saw Tilly, you know Tilly right? The bright red hair, covered in tattoos with the tongue piercing?”

“Didn’t know she had a tongue piercing but yes I know Tilly, go on.”

“Well, she came into class with a new bag and phone and I’m talking about designer bags.”

I nod along with Nova, slipping off my shoes and looking through my wardrobe for my lounge wear.

“Anyway, I asked how she got these because only last week was she complaining about having to work three jobs to afford to live and oh my god you’re going to flip.”

“Nov, just tell me.”

“Porn, Tilly is getting paid to cum.”

I laugh covering my mouth as I lock eyes with Nova, seeing her seriousness.

“Wait really? Shit, good for her I guess.”

Nova nods as I sit across from her on my bed.

“Which brings me to my no judgment question.”

“Oh no.”

“Oh yes, we should look into it!”

“Nova, I can’t do porn.”

“Yes you can! You’re so hot, literally all the frat guys want you, you would literally be rolling in it.”

“But you know I don’t want frat guys. I wan-”

“I know, I know, you want a man that knows what he’s doing, someone with experience.” Nova mimics. “There’s a kink for that you know, it’s called a daddy kink.”

I roll my eyes at Nova, laying back on my bed and sighing.

“C’mon, it's good money.”

“Nova, I’m not recording myself for other people’s pleasure.”

“Don’t you need a car? Wouldn’t you like to be debt free? You could move to New York and own a penthouse!”

“Nova, enough.”

“Just know it's an option, I’m going to talk to Tilly about it.”

I nod in response as Nova grabs her stuff and leaves the dorm.

| | | |

It had been roughly four months since Nova mentioned the porn industry and never in my life did I consider that I would walk into this world from beyond my phone screen.

Within four months I had worked with numerous adult film stars, many of them satisfying, others only just worth the paycheck.

“Ready?” Nova smiles, her skin tight velvet dress hugging her curves perfectly.

I quickly swipe the red lipstick across my lips, pouting before looking myself up and down. A black see through lace dress, a leg slit high up to my panty line, lace barely covering my boobs, not leaving much to the imagination. Not that the imagination is needed when half if not all of these people at the party have seen me naked.

“Ready.” I smile. “You know, I hate these parties, why do we need monthly parties?” Nova groans, quickly lighting a cigarette as we leave my penthouse, walking through the crisp air of New York.

“Networking, how do you think I became so big so quickly? You’ve gotta promote yourself to the big wigs, make them want you.”

Nova shakes her head, taking a long drag from her cigarette as we round the corner to the hotel, joining the line of other actors.

“I dont want to whore myself out.”

I smirk, looking at Nova as we both laugh.

We’re quickly ushered into the glamorous hotel following behind people into the marvelous ballroom. Floor to ceiling windows of the New York skyline, dimly lit corners with velvet booths. Champagne towers in various spaces, topless wait staff and music blasting through the air. The thump of bass slightly vibrates the windows and glasses.

“Ooo” Nova’s face lights up as the waiter passes us, grabbing two glasses of champagne.

“Cheers to making it out of struggleville.” Nova states, gently tapping her glass against mine.

I quickly tip the lightly bubbling liquid into my mouth, finishing the drink quickly, Nova following suit. Both of us replaced our empty glasses with a refill.

“Holy fuck.” Nova chokes on her drink as I follow her eye line, my mouth becoming dry.

Nanami Kento and Satoru Gojo walk through the crowd, talking with three men both looking fucking mouthwatering.

“They never come to these things, I have never seen these two in person, fuck they’re tall, god fucking damnit, who do I sweet talk to get with them.” Nova rambles beside me as my eyes trail over the pair.

Both men are dressed in full black suits, Nanami has yellow tinted glasses resting on the bridge of his nose and Gojo with black shades tucked into his suit pocket. Both taller in person than expected. Nanami pushes his glasses higher on his nose, my eyes fixated on his hands, god his hands.

“Y/n?”

“Sorry, uh, I was daydreaming.” Blush slightly creeps up my neck as Nova chuckles.

“I haven’t seen you blush in a while.” “Haven’t been nervous in a while.”

Nova chuckles as she goes wide eyed slightly. Quickly composing herself.

“They’re coming over.”

I look over my shoulder and see the duo walking towards us as I quickly finish my drink, hoping the liquid courage rushes through me.

“Ladies.” Gojo smiles

“Gojo, Nanami.” I smile, feeling Nova nudge my shoulder handing me a fresh glass of champagne. I thank her with my eyes, feeling my skin cover with goosebumps under the eyes of the two men, both of them drinking in my appearance, sharing a look as Nanami pushes his glasses up again.

“I didn’t expect to see you both.” Nova breaks the moments of silence between all of us as Gojo chuckles, grabbing a glass of wine from the various waiters walking around.

“Didn’t think our absence was that noticeable.” Nanami mutters as Nova giggles.

Before Nova can say anything Geto walks up behind her.

“Gentlemen.” Geto nods at them, looking at me “Y/n.” He winks, whispering into Nova’s ear as she quickly nods and gets whisked away.

‘Fuck.’

It feels like the room gets smaller and time slows as the duo in front of me share a look, both of them with a slight smirk on their lips.

“So, what changed your mind in attending?”

“When someone knocks you out of first place, you’ve got to scout the competition.” Gojo smiles, both him and Nanami stepping slightly closer to me, towering over me.

“Oh, can’t handle losing?” I smirk, Gojo licks his lips and Nanami chuckles.

“We don’t like to lose darling.” Nanami whispers, his warm breath fanning my neck, a tingle running down my spine.

“We’d like to offer you something honey.” Gojo whispers, his hand holding my hip. “A night with us, no crew, just us three.”

“Don’t break our hearts baby.” Nanami whispers, pressing a soft kiss to my cheek. Gojo’s hand caresses my hip, his warmth seeping through the sheer lace of my dress.

I open my mouth, zero words forming as I nod. Gojo tuts shaking his head.

“We need to hear you agree.”

“Tell us what you think darling.”

Both men seek my approval as I smirk.

“Yes.” I whisper, my eyes flicking between the two of them as both men smirk.

“Gojo.” Nanami states as the white haired man nods, grabbing my hand and pulling me through the crowd, Nanami with his hand on the small of my back helping to guide me.

We make it to the elevator, the three of us standing in silence, a light chatter within the lobby and the distant thump of the bass from the party filling the air.

The elevator tings as the doors open, the three of us piling as the doors slowly close. The second the doors are closed both men push me against the glass window.

“Fuck.” I whisper, Gojo’s lips on my neck as Nanami kisses along my jaw.

Nanami grabs my chin between his thumb and index finger. His eyes lingering on my lips.

“Baby, you won’t be the same after us.”

“I’m counting on it.” I whisper as Nanami smiles, his tongue dragging along his bottom lip before our lips crash against each other. I moan into the kiss, Gojo sucking on my neck, his hand grabbing a handful of my ass.

Nanami pulls away from me as Gojo cups my cheek, bringing our lips together. His tongue fighting against mine, his kiss rougher than Nanami’s.

The elevator dings, both men pulling away from me as my chest rises and falls quickly. My brain is trying to fathom what’s about to happen.

Halfway down the hall, Nanami unzips my dress, his fingers lightly tracing my back as wetness continues to pool between my thighs, my pussy aching.

Gojo unlocks the door as Nanami slips my dress down my arms. The door clicking shut as my dress pools at my heels.

Both men stand and look at me, the only light coming from the city below. My skin feels hot, blush creeping up my neck as their eyes foam up and down my body. My thin G-string barely covered me from their gaze.

“God.” Nanami groans, loosening his tie as Gojo undoes his belt.

I bend down to undo my heels causing Gojo to stop me.

“We want them left on baby girl.”

“We’re sure you paid enough for them.” Nanami states, his jacket being folded neatly and draped over the couch, his body beside me as he trails his fingers up my side. My breath hitches as Gojo walks out of the room.

Before I can question his absence, he walks back into the room, a camera in his hand. Butterflies erupt inside of me as Gojo flicks on a soft warm light, getting the camera at the right angle of the couch right by the city scape.

“We don’t want a crew to be watching us, everyone hearing the sounds you make for us.”

“We want you to forget the camera exists, the bright lights and the sound crew.”

“We want you on our platform, our girl.”

Their words are like honey, smooth and sweet. The butterflies and goosebumps swarming all over me.

“Let me be yours.”

“Music to our ears princess.” Gojo smirks, quickly ridding himself of his clothes, Nanami following suit.

Gojo wraps his hand around my neck, pulling me closer to him as our lips crash together. His hands roam my body, his finger hooks into my G-string and flicks it against my skin. I moan into his mouth, a gasp falls from my lips as Nanami’s hand cups my pussy. A low groan filling the air.

“You’re soaked, fuck Gojo she’s dripping.”

My moans fill the air as Gojo pulls away from me, his piercing blue eyes focusing on Nanami’s hand, watching his fingers rub my swollen clit through my panties.

“Good girl.” Gojo praises, kissing the side of my head. I run my hand down Gojo’s toned chest, softly digging my nails into his skin, causing a low sigh to fall from his lips. I trace his clothed cock, watching him bite his lip before I slip my hand into his boxer briefs. “Fuck Nanami.” I gasp, his fingers slipping past my panties and pinching my clit.

“Lay down baby, let us take care of you.”

I lay on the soft couch, my head on the arm rest as Gojo comes to stand above me, Nanami moves my legs, hooking one over the back of the couch, spreading my pussy for his eyes.

“Perfect, more perfect than the camera could ever capture.”

I blush at Nanami’s words, looking up at Gojo, his cock springing free.

My lips part, shocked by his size.

“You can take it darling.” I open my mouth at Gojo’s words, a smirk on his lips as my tongue traces the tip of his cock.

“Fuck daddy” I moan, looking down at Nanami, his tongue slowly dragging up and down my slit, sucking my clit between licks. Nanami moans against my pussy.

“Keep calling me that.” He whispers before continuing to trace my clit with his tongue.

“Darling.” Gojo whispers, his hand holding under my chin, tilting my head back. “I know Kento is good, but daddy needs attention.”

I nod, using my hand to guide Gojo’s cock into my mouth, pumping whatever I can’t fit. Circling my tongue around his dick, hollowing out my cheeks, his cock falling past my lips with a ‘pop’.

“You’re good at that darling, don’t stop.”

I moan around Gojo’s cock his hand caressing my cheek, soft moans filling the air.

My free hand grips Nanami’s hair, tugging at the strands causing a groan to vibrate against me.

“We should have fucked you sooner.” Nanami whispers, blowing against my warm pussy, my legs shaking with a tingle. My back arches, his fingers slipping inside of me, slowly pumping in and out, curling up inside of me.

“Y/n, god baby you’re tight.”

I smirk at Nanami’s words, popping Gojo’s cock past my lips and pumping him faster.

“All yours, only for you.”

Nanami and Gojo chuckle.

“You’re eager to please us honey.”

I blush at Gojo’s words, watching as he pulls away from me, him and Nanami swapping places.

Nanami leans over me, his lips connecting with mine as I taste myself on his tongue. Both of us moaning into the kiss, his fingers dancing across my collar bone, his hands cupping my boobs.

“God Yes!” I scream, Gojo slipping inside of me, his cock stretching my pussy as Nanami rolls my nipples between his thumb and index finger.

“Fuck honey, no wonder your number one.”

I giggle at Gojo’s words, swiping my tongue around Nanami’s cock, his hand moving from my breast to my throat, softly applying pressure as he thrusts in and out of my throat. My eyes roll backwards, the sounds of our moans filling the air, the scent of sex flowing through the room.

“Good girl, you’re taking us so well.”

“Uh huh” I moan in agreement, Gojo’s thumb brushes against my clit, rubbing in fast circles.

“C’mon baby, daddy wants you to cover his cock.”

“Go on darling, cum for Gojo.”

I drag my nails up Nanami’s chest, his cock thrusting in and out of my mouth, my tongue swirling around him. Gojo rubs my clit faster, his thrusts dragging out of me slowly and thrusting into me harshly.

I dig my nails into Nanami’s abs, his groan filling the air as I hollow out my cheeks around his cock. My back arching and legs slightly shake.

“Just like that baby, that’s a good girl, cum for me.”

Nanami slips past my lips, my scream of pleasure filling the air.

“Fuckkkk.”

My body jolts, my pussy tightening around Gojo causing him to hiss.

“Just like that baby.” Gojo gently rubs my clit, his thrusts slowing.

“You’re such a good girl for us princess.” Nanami whispers.

I hum in response, blissed out as I feel the couch dip, Gojo and Nanami switching places.

Nanami grabs me by my hips, pulling me up to straddle his waist, his lips connecting with mine. Our tongues swirl against each other, his hands grabbing my ass, spanking each cheek.

I feel Gojo’s hand caress my cheek, my lips pulling away from Nanami’s. I smile up at Gojo, his thumb brushing against my bottom lip dragging it down as my mouth falls open slightly. I take Gojo’s thumb into my mouth, sucking and swirling my tongue as Nanami runs his cock up and down my slit.

My head tilts back, a moan falling from my lips as I gasp at Nanami’s size, his cock stretching my walls, slightly thicker than Gojo.

“God Nanami.”

“Mm, fuck you’re so wet and tight.” Nanami whispers, his teeth pulling on my ear lobe as Gojo holds my chin, his eyes locking with mine as his friend thrusts in and out of me, his hands holding my ass guiding my hips back and forth.

“You take cock so well baby.”

I smirk at Gojo’s words, leaning to the side of Nanami and tracing my tongue along Gojo’s cock.

Gojo’s fingers run through my hair, pulling it into a makeshift ponytail. Our eyes lock together as I use the rhythm from Nanami to bop my mouth up and down on Gojo.

Nanami wraps his hand around my throat, applying slight pressure causing my eyes to water and a gag to fall around Gojo’s cock.

“Huh, are you cryin’?” Gojo taunts a cocky smirk on his lips.

“Struggling to take both of us?” Nanami grunts.

I moan in protest, feeling completely full and blissed out.

“By the way her pussy is gripping me, I think she likes it.”

“Oh she fucking loves it.” Gojo states, thrusting his cock deeper down my throat as tears prick my eyes.

I pull off Gojo, my chest rising and falling as my nails dig into Nanami’s shoulders.

“God, I’m close.”

Nanami moan’s against my ear, his hand slipping between us as he rubs my clit in fast circles.

My moans fill the air, my hand pumping Gojo’s cock fast, my thumb brushing over the tip of his cock with every second stroke. Gojo runs a hand through his hair, tilting his head back, his loud moans complimenting mine.

“Just like that baby.”

“You feel so good.” Nanami moans, his head resting on the back of the couch, his fingers digging into my hips, his thrusts speeding up.

“I’m cumming!” I moan, my pussy clenching around Nanami, my hand speeding up on Gojo’s cock. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, don’t stop.”

Gojo’s fingers slip into my hair, his hand pulls my head back causing my mouth to fall open as I stick my tongue out.

“Such a good girl.” Gojo smiles, pumping his cock against my tongue, hot bursts of cum covering my taste buds.

My eyes roll back, feeling Nanami’s cum shoot inside of me, coating my walls as I swallow Gojo’s release.

Gojo leans against the couch, resting on his hands, all of us taking a moment.

Savoring our time together.

I slowly lift myself off Nanami’s cock, both of us wincing at the loss of contact. I sit beside Nanami on the couch, Gojo leaning down and pressing a kiss to the top of my head before walking over to the camera and stopping the video.

“I hope you know we’re making this a monthly thing.”

“Oh really?” I ask, raising an eyebrow at Gojo’s comment.

Nanami’s hand falls to my thigh, running his finger tips up and down, a soft smile on his lips.

“But we won’t film everytime.”

“Mm, I’d love that.”

“Wait.” I quickly stand up, my legs shaky as I search through our clothing, finding my phone and sitting on the couch with Nanami. Gojo smiles, walking over to the two of us standing behind the couch. I aim the camera at the three of us, Gojo’s lips on my neck, Nanami’s hand around my throat as his lips whisper against my ear.

“Show off.”

I smirk, taking a quick picture and showing the two of them. I quickly uploaded the photo to my instagram and twitter with the caption.

‘Champagne never tasted so good.’

[girlbowser]

karkat goes through some changes

homestuck

tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG]. TT: It's come to my attention that you've been having some difficulties with Karkat. TG: "oh hey dave" TG: "how are you doing" TG: "good good yeah i know its been ages but ive got a question for you" TG: "hows karkat doing" TT: My apologies. TT: If you'd like to restart the conversation, but frontloaded with pleasantries, we can do that immediately. TG: nah jigs already up TG: theres a suspiciously empty bag and cat just fucking headbutting everything in existence TG: the elephant in the room is eyeing me flapping its monstrous goddamn ears blinking its sad eyes TG: walking around crunching the bones of the dead horse that ive been beating TT: Dave. TG: yo TT: Are you okay? TG: hell of a fucking question TG: i mean TG: im doing fine TG: im coping TG: its not like im the one in the relationship who woke up three feet taller and more intimidating overnight TG: with literally no clothes that fit TG: and an unrecognizable goddamn complexion TG: you know that blush palette kanaya got us that one time is basically junk now TG: we were so excited to literally never use it but now its become mandatory TG: the thrill of ignoring a gift is all evaporated TG: at least we still have that fucking popcorn maker that june got us rotting away in a cupboard somewhere TT: Dave. TG: im extremely normal about this

TG: its not every day your boyfriend of five years grows into a giant troll monster TG: leaving behind a molted skin of his days of being a regular troll monster TG: that one was TG: genuinely extremely fucking unpleasant to discover TT: I can only imagine. TT: Kanaya's more-or-less confirmed to never be able to molt again, thanks to her immortality. TT: Waking up next to, essentially, the skinned corpse of your boyfriend, while an adult with his face is crying next to you, seems incredibly distressing. TG: yeah TG: it uh TG: we didnt actually realize what the fuck was in the bed until a few hours after karkats first "oh god im like your human professor hulk" cry TG: what the fuck was the deal with professor hulk by the way TG: like why was he in the movie TG: did they just not have the budget to shoot mark ruffalos unaltered face TG: every film the guys in has a budget for ruffalo shielding an audience exposed to a noncgi ruffalo is well and truly fucked TT: Dave. TG: im fine

TG: its fine TG: its just TG: kind of a big fucking deal TG: mostly for him TG: i think hes the first mutant to pupate into adulthood for literally more than the timespan of two universes TG: its like getting run over by the puberty truck and somehow ending up with muscles out of it TG: the same kind of injury logic that created handsome squidward TT: Mm. TT: I figured something like that would be the case, emotionally. TG: as always you are the genius of our time TT: I have one more question. TT: Do you need Kanaya and I to come over to make more clothes for him? TG: wow TG: thats genuinely a really nice offer TG: yeah come over whenever TG: karkats been tarzanning it for a little too long TG: not that the primal look isnt fantastic at times but uh TG: well lets just say theres only so much i can handle at once TT: We'll be right over. tentacleTherapist [TT] ceased pestering turntechGodhead [TG].

[chrisevansonly]

I'm Not Meant for This

Chris Evans x Girlfriend Reader

Summary: You weren’t meant for this life, the cameras, the gossip, the fan pages, it wasn’t you, letting yourself suffer wasn’t worth it anymore…was there anyway that would change?

Warnings: angst, minor arguing, crying, reader mentioning insecurities, happy ending<3

A/N: This was a request sent in by an anon! Thank you in advance for this, I’m a big lover of happy endings and I did tweak the request a little bit so I hope that’s okay!!I feel so unmotivated but I’m trying to update regardless lol

Word Count: 843

Spending a lot of time watching your life go by from outside your body looking down on yourself is a feeling so hard to describe, surrounding by celebrities of all calibres and standing, next to Chris you felt like you weren’t supposed to be here. You’d been feeling pretty low the past few months, Chris’s career doing really well, he just finished filming his last few movies for 2022 and 2023, and instead of talking about taking a break, he wanted to keep going. In retrospect, talking to Chris about your feelings should have been number one on the list of conversations you wanted to have, but maybe leaving and letting him down gently was better. Watching him talk freely in the sea of people, or handle the cameras like champ, all it did for you was made you feel out of place and disgusted by yourself. You knew this wasn’t his fault, you could only blame yourself for the position you were in, but you couldn’t take it anymore. 

-

The minute the two of you got home, you ditched your heels at the front door, leaving Chris standing there to go upstairs and into the bathroom. Looking at yourself in the mirror only made it worse, the bags and dark circles under your eyes despite the full coverage foundation and concealer covering it. Taking a wipe you cleaned your face off, letting out a quiet sigh, your eyes closing for a few seconds, and when you opened them, Chris was looking at you, an unreadable expression on his face 

“You’ve been really quiet all night…what’s going on?”

This was your chance, let him down easy, spend one last night with him and leave tomorrow, move far away, start over, leave Chris in the past

“I can’t do this anymore.”

“Do what baby?” 

You turned and motioned between the two of you 

“This, us, I can’t do it anymore, I’m not meant for this life Chris, I can’t fucking do this.”

You moved past him, ducking away into the closet to get out of the floor length black dress you had on, changing into a pair of cotton shorts and an oversized t-shirt

“Wait a minute, Y/N…we’re going to talk about this”

“I don’t want too anymore! I’m tired of constantly being attacked online, photographed without my consent, being the odd one out at every event, people I don’t even know nitpicking my appearance! I’m done!”

Chris ran a hand down his face 

“You know that’s not my fault, right?”

“Jesus Chris, that’s what you have to say?! I’m going to pack my stuff.”

His hand grasped yours tightly and he pulled you back to him softly, but firm enough for you to land against his chest, his arms holding you to him

“No. No. I can’t lose you, not now, not ever, we can figure a way to fix this problem.”

You shook your head, tears now falling down your cheeks

“No, we can’t, there’s n-”

“Yes, there is. Screw going back to work, i’ll take time off, as much as we need, I should have made that decision last year, but I didn’t and now I am. We can go away, stay at the cabin for a few months just me and you, restart your social media’s, hire more security, hell we can order our fucking groceries, that exists now!”

You laughed quietly into the flannel he had on, and Chris spoke again, beating you to it

“You are everything to me, you are my world, my light, and I wished you would have told me about this sooner so I could have helped you…I’m so sorry I didn’t notice how much this was hurting you, how much I was hurting you. You are the most beautiful girl in the world to me, and I swear to you I’ll fix this, we can make this work…”

Staying silent, eventually hugging him back tighter you closed your eyes before making a decision you hoped you wouldn’t regret

“Okay.”

Hearing your voice, Chris pulled back and brought his hands up to cup your face, swiping a few tears away before connecting his lips with yours, kissing you tenderly before pulling away and frowning when he noticed just how drained you looked 

“I love you so much angel, I’m going to make this right, and I’m going to work my hardest to keep you safe and happy, I promise I won’t let this happen again…”

A small part of you was worried you made the wrong decision but looking into Chris’s eyes and seeing just how much he love and appreciated you, was enough to help your heart prove you were doing the right thing. In the end you knew Chris would go to the ends of the earth for you, and he was willing to do that now, to protect you, and to give you the life he knows you deserve. The road would be long, but as long as you had Chris, he could make the journey a little more bearable. 

[babyfairy]

hello…life updates lol

i saw the little mermaid with my mom and my niece (we went on my mom’s birthday 💌) and i loved it??!? i think halle was the perfect choice for ariel!! i was so enchanted by her mannerisms the entire film. she’s got such an otherworldly beauty so paired with her voice she REALLY looks and feels like a disney princess…loved her so much. no comment on awkwafina’s unfortunate addition to the film

we’re restarting one of our long running dnd campaigns and i’m pretty sad about it ❤️‍🩹 it’s the best choice because the setting was made by our DM a long time ago and she wants a reset because she’s improved her narration/lore/etc since its creation but it’s still sad and hard to let go. i’m really excited to relive some of my favorite moments with some new twists and i have a deeper understanding of my character now so i think i’ll only end up loving her more as i replay her. dnd with my friends is truly one of my favorite hobbies and it’s so important to me! there have been so many changes throughout the years i’ve played but i’m so glad to still be playing despite it because it’s very fun and therapeutic lol

i got a raise at work 🫨 not that it makes much of a difference LMFAO but i was seriously considering leaving my job before my raise so it’s nice to be making a little more money. the cost of living in washington is so insane that i feel really unsure of my future lol but it’s seriously my dream to own my own house. just a little one story house that i can call my own. i know it seems like a small dream lol but it’s literally my number one motivation and i’m always daydreaming about how i’d decorate my own home inside and out!!

i finally bought tears of the kingdom and i’ve been obsessed with it!!! not surprised because i loved breath of the wild lol. i love link so much he’s such a cool protagonist. always wanted to be like him when i was a kid LMAOO either him or sheik! i would say i’m more like a deku scrub…💀 like look at this fella…

like….???!!!! THATS ME…the lil angry face. love these guys. anyways i love the game LMAO i hit about 50 hours and realized i should maybe try tackling my first dungeon 💀 it’s just so much fun to run around and collect ingredients and koroks…plus i have a little pack of zelda amiibo cards so every day i hop on and scan them all so i can open treasure chests as a little treat…love it!!! i can’t wait to see king sidon again btw. that’s the light of my life

ever since my OCD diagnosis i’ve been avoiding my therapist (L) and struggling to really understand why but i think it’s because i feel guilty about being diagnosed LMAO…i have like this weird fixation on unknowingly manipulating/lying to others and my brain keeps trying to convince me i manipulated her into a diagnosis. i don’t feel like i have “real” OCD if that makes sense. and i feel this weird sense of guilt about making light of it or like taking resources from people with real, severe OCD. it’s frustrating because i know that’s definitely a symptom of OCD but i also feel like none of my symptoms are legitimate and they’re just delusions. it’s incessant. which like logically is that probably just a symptom of the OCD? yeah but i also am having trouble admitting that to myself for some reason lol. at least not without guilt or shame attached and i really try to avoid feeling that way if i can. anyways it’s a real pain in the ass and i finally sucked it up and made an appointment for tomorrow so i can try to talk through some of this with her

i’m up and down a lot, it’s been the worst year of my life i think lol but somehow i’m still chugging along 💀 every day i put the rainbow clown wig back on and march thru my day despite it all though so it’s whatever i guess. definitely going thru my saturn return and ngl so far it sucks and i definitely hate it but you know! my 20s have been Not Great so maybe my 30s will be better for it. hope everyone is doing well and staying safe. let me know what you’re up to in my inbox if you want! i always like when people message me their life updates lol. it’s sweet when people think of me as someone they want to update ❣️

[sweetiesicheng]

dino - dance class

word count : 760

-

what the fuck is this?

you stood in one of the back corners of the room watching dancers dance to the choreography. almost half an hour ago, you walked into this class ready to have a blast. twenty-five minutes ago you checked your phone to find out you were in an industry leveled dance class.

god y/n, can you not read or something?

you drank some water from your bottle and sighed.

no wonder this class was longer than the rest. you idiot...

"you okay?"

you looked over and saw one of the choreographer's assistants standing next to you. he gave you a small smile, and you nervously smiled back at him.

"um, no," you truthfully admitted.

"do you want to go over the choreography?" he asked.

"i'm, uh, i'm in the wrong class," you said, "i read the thing wrong," you mentioned to him.

he processed what you said and nodded in response. "it's okay. mistakes happen," he replied, "but i can help you with it if you want. we're about to take a break," he mentioned.

"oh, sure," you agreed.

y/n, why did you agree?! you can't do this?!

"cool," he smiled again.

"dino! come here!" the main instructor called out and the guy next to you turned his head.

"coming!"

the guy hurried out to the center of the room. the song that had been playing restarted, and you watched the guy and some other people dance the choreography everyone had been learning.

woah.

you watched the guy in amazement as he showed off his dance skills. the isolations and small details were so noticeable and looked so cool at the same time.

after about a minute, someone stopped the song.

"let's take a ten minute break! we'll learn the rest and film afterwards!" the choreographer announced to the class. almost everyone went to grab a drink while others left to get some fresh air.

you drank some more of your water before trying to dance to the choreography that you could barely comprehend.

"hey, what part are you having trouble with?" the guy appeared by you.

"oh, most of it..." you shyly admitted.

"let's go over from the beginning," he said.

the guy helped you go through everything and simplified a lot of it for you, which helped. however, he was called away for a minute, and you continued going through everything by yourself.

"excuse me, everyone!" someone spoke up. it was one of the other assistants. "hoshi had to take a call so we're just gonna play the music until he gets back," the assistant mentioned.

then, the music turned on. almost everyone started practicing again while you stayed in your corner.

"hey, sorry about that," the guy returned.

you shook your head, "it's okay."

"where were we? oh, here," he spoke and started going through what was left of the choreography. "and then..."

-

a few minutes later, the instructor came back, and the rest of the choreography was taught. after a few run through, someone started recording small groups of people starting with the instructor and his assistants.

again, you watched in awe at the guy who had been helping you the whole time. he looked super cool and looked so professional while dancing.

once the class ended, you grabbed your belongings but waited to see if you could say goodbye to the guy. however, it seemed like he had already left.

you decided to leave the room and looked at a schedule with other classes that were being offered, making sure to pay attention to what level the classes were.

"hey!"

you turned and saw the guy hurry up to you.

"i was wondering where you were," he mentioned. "good job in there," he complimented, "you did really good, honestly."

"oh, thanks," you said and smiled at him.

"i'm chan," he suddenly introduced himself, "but everyone calls me dino."

"y/n," you replied.

"so y/n, what class are you going to next?" he asked, glancing over at the schedule you were looking at.

"definitely not an industry leveled one, that's for sure," you said to him, making him chuckle.

"yea, it might not be your cup of tea," he said to you. then, he pointed at the schedule, "you should come to this one," he suggested and you looked to see an intermediate leveled class that was occurring in a few days.

"will you be there?" you asked him.

"i hope so, it's my class after all," he replied. "so, see you there?"

you nodded, "yea, see you there."

[the-poetking]

THE-POETKING INTRO PAGE

Who am I?

I'm known as zenith_godly on JAI and have written several tumblr writing blogs, wattpad fanfics and a few original novels. I used to run some conversation prompt blogs (parker-fics) but I'm restarting here.

I'm an AuDHD, trans, gay, 18 year old man who loves writing, film and all things creative. I especially love world building and character creation which is how I got into bot making on JAI. You can call me Z, King, PK or some other version. Most new websites or medias I join will be under the-poetking now.

What do I do?

I make bots on JAI but I want to expand. I'm hoping to start doing commissioned writing (I will write poems for you or fanfics of scenarios you've been craving but haven't been able to find. Depends on the fandom). In the future, this could be a patreon for online books or character creation. What I'm hoping to do is start having people pay for specific bots and again- taking suggestions on stuff you guys want to see!

What does the future look like?

Hopefully, a successful online writing career! My goal is to create a strong fanbase and I may even expand to other social medias. Hopefully a novel or two and some short films as well. At this point, I'm unsure but it's looking good! (getting a ko-fi set up really soon!!!!)

How can you support me?

Right now, following me, sending me submissions on here, leaving reviews on JAI and just being supportive right now. Again; everything means so much to me.

Rules:

No incest, r@pe, pedo, abusive relationship, etc., bots. This isn't saying I don't do dead dove, but I personally do not want to romanticize this. If it includes this, it's probably a character's traumatic past.

Don't be really mean to me pls ill cry.

I love angsty shit. My stuff MIGHT include dead dove/trauma of some kind. I will tag it and put trigger warnings but don't get upset with me.

No bigotry will be tolerated. I want this to be a safe space for POC, LGBTQIA+, disabled, women, men, enbies... everyone. Well, like mainly everyone.

DNI: radqueer supporters (transracial, transage, transid, etc), radfems (TERFS), bigots, gatekeepers, toxic people and just that stuff. This isn't to say you can't enjoy my stuff but personally, I do find this stuff offensive

[alittlefrenchtree]

Celebrities stan really ruined everything and especially Twitter stan ruined everything. Such a closed mentality, a bubble where you decide who is famous and who isn't based on nothing, comparing different artists, deciding who to hate and who not based on who you like and who you don't. Timothée and Zendaya are considered people who can't act. Timothée was considered a flop after Bones and All and is now the lead actor in two of the highest-grossing films ever. And everyone is influenced by this mentality. Comparing Taylor to Nick is not only stupid but it is a unique wickedness because as you say they have different paths but I have to be honest, the lack of objectivity towards Nick (despite the fact that I love him and adore him and follow him in everything, better to specify before they think I'm a hater) is starting to annoying me a bit because for these people a celebrities must be the first in the world in everything, if you can't boast about this then it's not worth it.

And it's true that Nick has much more popularity behind him and films that have given him more visibility but seeing people freaking out for a 100% on rotten tomatoes (more than Dune got on debut and says it all) on 6 reviews where at the premiere there were only fans practically leaves me speechless. Not because it can't be a good movie but because... seriously?

And the whole "white boy of the moment" leave me speechless because this say everything you have to know about how it work this unhealthy celebrities stan.

Btw, before I'm considered a hater again I'll shift the focus and say that yes, you're right there were many circumstances that slowed down Taylor's career a lot from tkb onwards, this forgetting that his sister got sick and he lost her in 8 weeks and he will have completely shifted the focus of his entire life... It makes me furious.

Just as many productions are only now restarting despite the end of the strike months ago. And why do we forget that despite m&g and despite the idea of ​​you, Nick also doesn't have any films in production and we still don't know anything about future projects? Just like Taylor.

This ask is probably completely useless and I don't know if you'll want to publish it but it's absurd to think, sitting on your couch at home without ever having seen anything about how those things work, deciding that an actor isn't doing well for his career just because one of his costars made a few more films in the meantime. Comparing them is unfair and mean.

You’re adding a few important points to previous statements so i’m happily sharing. Don’t let them ruin your fun though 💜💜💜

[phil-lesterfan]

yaoi scholar….. pls i finished the untamed and word of honor what should my next drama be 👀 (happy endings only pls)

also i wanna know your fav bls. if you’ve the time!!

hallo! i didn't mean to let this sit for so long, but i've been using my phone more and don't like answering asks there. i don't actually know many cdramas, but i've got other dramas to rec, if that's alright!

(C/K/J)DRAMAS/LAKORNS:

sotus & sotus s (thai)*

history3: trapped (taiwanese)

seven days (japanese)*

manner of death (thai)*

restart after coming back home (japanese)*

together with me (thai)

long time no see (korean)

semantic error (korean)*

you can watch 2moons2 for the full story, but honestly, the original 2moons mingkit cut is everything to me (thai)*

*based off novel/manga/manhwa

20 of my fav bls under the cut :)

initially, i was going to call it my "top 10", but it's not my top ten, it's just favs that i really love or think you (sara) would also enjoy. so it's just 20 "random" favs. if you (general) want, i can upload the 200+ long list and even include "reviews" of my favourites, but i'll only do that upon request. also here's my blanket rec for mxtx's works. svsss is my fav. i'm very easy. thank you <3

20 OF MY FAV BLS:

sotus is very dear to my heart. i watched it right before i went to university, so it really set that mood for me lol it's not a perfect story, the audio is shit at some parts, and the acting was sometimes stiff, but when the show hit, my fucking god did it HIT. of course i roped all my friends into watching it. it was based on a novel, but the novel didn't particularly stand out to me (sorry). there's also a manga now (3 vols) but i'm just loyal to the show, y'know? it also has a sequel, and that one made one of my friend cry (i actually had to pause the show lol), but for me, the first season is what's rly stellar. (lakorn / rewatches: 4? 5? a lot?)

sasaki and miyano by syou harusono is such an easy read, with lovely art, cute characters, and the softest, sweetest romance. it makes me feel like i've been hit by a car, then the car backed up and drove over me again. sasaki is the light of my life (and also if i looked like him, i'd never shut up. and i project just a little bit too bc oh he just like me fr), and everyday i think about making him my pfp. i owe syou harusono my life. i want to say more about this bc it rly is my fav manga perhaps of all time but that also means i can't say more about it LOL (manga / rereads: 6)

the cat proposed (bakeneko katatte sourou) by hayane dento is quite possibly the best manga i've ever read. the writing is so beautiful, and it's a really relatable and inspiring story for me. plus it's got catboys. *motions to my dnp catboy pfp* but in all seriousness, it's a genuinely great story that squeezes my heart and leaves me in tears (manga / rereads: 5)

doukyuusei is a certified bl classic. i've not read the entire manga series, but i've got the anime film saved to my laptop. that was another thing i roped all my friends into watching, and yes, everyone was gagged (animanga / rewatches: 4?)

koimonogatari by tagura tohru is incomplete, and the "love" part isn't there yet, but my fucking god. i think i just picked it up for funsies at the bookstore, but man was i unprepared. it's not a fun read by any means, nor is it easy, it's actually pretty brutal, but it's a good story, so i felt i should include it. (it is one of my faves) (manga / rereads: none bc i will kill myself.)

summer of you (kimi wa natsu no naka) by furuya nagisa changed me. it was one of those manga that was in my to read list for a really long time, but i just never did it. when i finally did, i totally regret putting it off. i think i cried. it has a sequel (summer with you), and that was good too, but that first one just really got me (manga / rereads: 1)

fools by yeongha has an art style i will forever be jealous of. the original, that is. i'm sure the remastered version is great, and probably the one i should read, but i'm just way too attached to the original and the art is (in my opinion) way better. the story is fun and sweet, and i read it at another formative time in my life. *jazz hands* (manhwa / rereads: 3)

my darling signed in by dimang and new lung. if there's one thing about me, i'm gonna read a video game catfish story. this manhwa is so fucking ridiculous, but i love it. it actually gets pretty dark, which took me by surprise the first time i read it, but it's not between the main cp, if you're worried about that (manhwa / rereads: 3)

dasadanan by herb mandu also has just lovely art. i can just stare at it for ages bc i'm so obsessed. also there's side gl, and i love those two girls so damn much. the story is very easy to read, fluffy, and it's just good feelings all around. it also has some really silly extras. (manhwa / rereads: 4)

history3: trapped is so... it is also dear to me. the main couple is funny and cute; however, it's the side couple that really gets to me. they're so ridiculous and fun, and the actor for zhao zi is an acrobat? does acrobatic dance? i'm not sure exactly, but they wanted to showcase that so he'd just be doing some random gymnast shit for no reason and it's so funny. and jack was made in a lab for me, so. y'know. (drama / rewatches: 2, about to be 3)

glasses cloth and playlist by gwak jonpil was recommended to me by a friend i believe, and i'm so glad i read it. it's another easy read and also very ridiculous, but when i say something is "ridiculous", that's usually a huge compliment. i LOLed at, like, every other panel. the main cp is so damn ridiculous, and i adore them. (manhwa / rereads: 1)

starting with a lie by liang azha has the softest art i've ever seen. that manhua is like a warm hug, if a warm hug also had you gritting your teeth and clenching your fists because GODDAMN JUST GET TOGETHER FOR REAL ALREADY! i love it. oh, but i don't like qiu tian. sorry. (manhua / rereads: 2)

how to survive as a villain by yi yi yi yi is... look, i'm sure it has flaws, right? every story has flaws, but wherever they are, i did not see them. i mean, it's a little bit ridiculous at times, but again, "ridiculous", and the mc was transmigrated into a once-good now-trashy harem novel. and he's also smart but oblivious. bound to be a little bit silly. but also this novel ripped out my heart and stomped on it. and i thought it wouldn't happen with the manhua, but i cried then too. what the hell. i really enjoyed this story, and i think it's what got me into transmigration stories in general :P (danmei / rereads: 2)

a shoulder to cry on by dongmul. okay. OKAY. this is not a "happy" story to most. also the ending without the extras/epilogue is bittersweet to ambiguous. the issue here is that I LOVE ENDINGS LIKE THAT!!!!!!!!! this story is so damn good and i like the art a lot and god, some of the quotes? every time i reach certain scenes i have to pause and stare at the wall because no fucking way. it's just too good. i should go ahead and warn that the couple doesn't have the healthiest of dynamics and their relationship starts bc one of them lies and accuses the other of sexual harassment, so. i'm just letting you know now. but i let myself have toxic yaoi. as a treat. tbh to me it's not that bad, but i know everyone has different intensity levels, so. (manhwa / rereads: 3)

never understand by bbong is an... interesting read. arguably more toxic yaoi, and everyone at times can be kind of awful and annoying, but i think that's fun. sorry. i vividly remember reading this for the first time. for some reason. also, as with a good amount of manhwa that i read in my more formative years, i like this art style. (manhwa / rereads: 1)

semantic error by j soori and angy kim is a lot more graphic and hardcore (sex-wise) than the kdrama, which makes sense, but like... DAMN! my toxic trait is that every three panels i pause and go "hey does anyone else think these guys look like jaedo?" and the sniper that's supposed to shoot me any time i bring up rps lets me live because i'm objectively right. the characters are so damn infuriating, but i like watching car crashes, so it's alright. plus the art is good and, well, i never said i don't ship jaedo. *glass next to me explodes after a bullet cuts through it* whatever! (rereads: none bc it ended not that long ago. but i'll probably reread it soon)

no.6 by asano atsuko and here comes all the haters being like, "oh, that's not bl!" "that's more than bl!" "[some more dumb shit i don't care about]!" suck my pussy. i don't care. i loooove the novels and hope we get a printed official english translation. people are right to say the romance isn't the focus, but it's there, and honestly, i love plotty shit. i've heard it's supposed to be the "happy version" of banana fish or whatever the fuck, but damn if that's not a fucked up version of happy. i sobbed my fucking eyes out (novel & animanga / rereads: 2)

snow fairy by serizawa tomo. i'm not gonna lie, i don't remember this story, but on my big list it has a heart next to it, and i feel like i cried when i read it. i've said i've cried about like half of these, and i cry when i see something cute or when i think about my blorbo or when a song is pretty, so that means nothing. but this one really got to me! i think it was just a simple story with lovely art. it aches, maybe. actually, i've just found my initial review, which reads: "im so miserable....." (rereads: none, but i'd like to reread it asap)

bj alex by mingwa. insert loud and disappointed "ooh" from the crowd bc really, phil-lesterfan? i thought you were a scholar? with taste? LOOK. i know this is a basic manhwa, and i couldn't give a rat's ass about the side cp, but ahn jiwon somehow became pookie. it is agonising, though, 'cause like i said, i don't care about the side cp, but oh my fucking god, it feels like everyone else only cares about them. shoot me. also the side cp is into bdsm, but you can skip over their shit honestly. (rereads: 2)

aien catharsis by oshima kamome was another manga that'd been in my tbr list for ages. i really like how the story feels. aaaaand i just reread it and ah. i see why it affected me. (if you can guess what line stuck out to me, lmk, i'd love to hear it heh) it's historical fiction and has lovely art. tw for sexual assault, but it's not between the cp and it's also not shown. (manga / rereads: 2)

like i said, i have a lot more favs, so if anyone wants the full list, just ask. or if you don't want the full list, i can give rec lists for certain genres or just manga or just danmei, etc, etc. i know i'm in batman hell right now (ah. western yaoi....), but i've been fujoshing since i was like... ten. okay this is of course way longer than it should be. hope u enjoy if you read any of these ^_^ <3

[stephaniejuhnay]

I watched a video the other day of top ten community episodes (and the five worst), and realized how nearly impossible that would be for me to do bc 90% of the show is so good to me. But I’m gonna try. I’m also gonna cheat bc it’s my post and idc.

Top 10 Best (aka my favorite) Community Episodes:

Conspiracy Theories and Interior Design - I wish I could watch this episode for the first time again because of the ride it took me on. I said it on here before but if there was only one episode I could recommend to someone from the series, it would be this. It’s so outlandish and fun that it’ll hook you into watching the series to understand how this school and these people got to this point and are just okay with it. Kevin Corrigan was a gem in this also. Anywho. The rest of these are all equally at 2 for me even tho I will be numbering them. Just understand that I love them all EQUALLY.

Advanced Dungeons & Dragons - another episode I wish I could watch again for the first time. To tell that story in mostly bottle episode form was brilliant. Also, the acting was top notch. Again, not a lot for them to work off of in terms of action and movement, so for it to be SUCH a compelling episode with them just sitting around the study room table is just a testament to the brilliance and vision of Dan and the writers and the cast. And the Russos for directing this masterpiece.

Remedial Chaos Theory - I know this is going to be a shocker, but this is an episode I wish I could watch again for the first time. Darkest timeline intro. Cigarette gag. Pizza dance. Toilet olives. Arguably Troy’s most iconic gif (he has many). What else do I need to say?

Cooperative Calligraphy - again. Bottle episode brilliance. And the twist of it all! I remember watching it and being dumbfounded by the end. But also so heart-warmed at how the group overcame. It’s always the heart in this series that wins no matter how insane the premise might be.

Basic Lupine Urology- if I’m remembering correctly, this might be the first episode I watched live after restarting the series. I started when it aired but didn’t stick with it until til my mom caught Aerodynamics of Gender on a plane and said “Steph you gotta watch this episode of this show I just saw.” And the rest is history. But yeah. The deep regret I had watching this episode bc I’d deprived myself of 2 years of this show…no one was taking the swings community took and pulling it off THIS well. Super conceptual, super low stakes made to be incredibly important, and easily some of the best jokes of the season, maybe the series.

Epidemiology - I literally was stunned that they pulled off that concept so well. I think I watched again after finishing it the first time because I couldn’t believe it. This was also when we got the start of the dean’s iconic costumes, a cornerstone of this show. Also, I was legitimately scared the first time watching this! 😂

Critical Film Studies - I think this was some of the best story-telling on this show. A really sweet story at the heart of it (which is the show as a whole) wrapped in a hilarious and really creative premise paying homage to one of the most obscure movies ever.

Paradigms of Human History - for a long time, this was my favorite episode bc I couldn’t believe what they pulled off. I still can’t honestly, which is why it’s second on my list (remember I said these are all #2 after Conspiracy Theories). When they came back and did it again in Curriculum Unavailable, I was thrilled and once again stunned. (You can count Curriculum Unavailable as part of this list I guess). Leave it to Dan to spin the clip show concept.

Contemporary American Poultry - this episode is amazing and rightfully called one of the best of season one. This episode laid the groundwork for establishing just how whimsical and insane Greendale could be, and made everything that came after it believable. It was also so incredibly heartwarming and the start of a lot of jokes that were called back.

Basic Intergluteal Numismatics - similar to the reasons I love Basic Lupine Urology. The commitment to the genre, the callback to the ACB, a one off joke from 2 seasons before, the fact that it’s still a cold case. I love it so much.

Honorable Mentions:

Modern Warfare, A Fist Full of Paintballs, For a Few Paintballs More, and Modern Espionage - I feel like the paintball run is in a league of their own and unfair to put in a top 10 list. Clearly they are amazing and amongst the best episodes of the series. And yes I purposely left out Advanced Introduction to Finality. That was not paintball. 😭

Football, Feminism, and You - this is when the show hit its stride for me when I finally went back to watch. The pacing, the writing, the actors finally figuring out who their characters were for real, Troy’s politically conservative shamefully outdated fight raps. It’s a perfect episode of television to me and to find that so early in a series is pretty amazing.

Aerodynamics of Gender - the episode that got me back into the show. I owe it so much. Also gave me one of my favorite Troy line: “worth it.”

Regional Holiday Music - again, Harmon’s (and his writers’) mind in pulling off these highly conceptual episodes that feels real to the world they built and grounded. I’m forever in awe.

Basic Human Anatomy - YES. A season 4 episode made this list. Jim Rash wrote the hell outta this episode and it was the brightest spot on season 4.

Five Worst Episodes:

I won’t elaborate on these too much bc the basic idea is that they were not good and felt contrived despite the writers trying to maintain Harmon’s world and the actors giving it everything they had. Yes they’re all from the gas leak year.

Advanced Introduction to Finality

Heroic Origins (I like to pretend none of those origins took place bc too many plot holes)

Alternative History of the German Invasion

Cooperative Escapism in Familial Relations (we deserved a better Jeff/William conflict and resolution and so did Jeff)

Conventions of Space and Time (this was a great concept that in Dan’s hands could’ve been brilliant)

[romancomicsblog]

Spider-Man Home Turf: My Pitch for Tom Holland's Next Spider-Man Movie

With the success of the original trilogy and a promise of 9 films in total, another Tom Holland Spider-Man film is imminent.

Although the writers strike is still going on (PAY YOUR WRITERS DISNEY), currently the next Spider-Man film is in early development and slated for 2025. That will likely be pushed back, but the idea of Spider-Man 4 is incredibly intriguing.

This film is not only a continuation of Peter's story, but a restart for him as well. There's a lot of potential for new characters, new story, and a different version of Spidey than what came before.

I have a pitch, one that takes whats great about Watts original trilogy, and I think brings Peter to a place we've never seen him go in live action.

This is not a script, just more so a general idea for the movie. I do have ideas for characters and casting though!

*Spoilers for the MCU in general and all Spider-Man movies*

Let's start with what I love about Watts trilogy:

Something/Someone New Everytime

Whether you love or hate these movies, one must admit every film felt different than what came before. Whether it was the John Hughes high school element, a road trip through Europe, or a multiversal magic finale, none of the films felt like Webbs or Raimis, but something fresh instead.

With the exception of No Way Home, the movies also focused on villains we had not seen before. Vulture, Mysterio, Shocker, The Thinker, all classic villains that never got their time in the light. I like that trend, and want to continue it.

The Mentor

One of the fun things about these movies for me is Peter gets a mentor to match his internal problem at hand. The best part is the mentor is usually kind of bad at it, leading Peter to come to his own conclusions and move beyond them to become an even better hero.

The character needs to make sense in the context of the story, be flawed, and most importantly, connected to the MCU in a way we've seen before.

Love Story

I like all the Peter/MJ & Peter/Liz stuff in all the movies. With MJ and Ned gone now, we're gonna want a new character for Peter to fall for. Again, I'd prefer someone we have never seen before, who can become a fan favorite in their own right.

With all that out of the way, here is the idea:

Peter Parker, now struggling to find any joy in his normal life, spends most of his time fighting crime as your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man. He will be in the suit for most of the movie, completely neglecting his normal life, as he feels there is nothing for him there.

Because there are not as many big world ending threats or villains to fight, in order to fill up his life, he has begun taking out portions of the mysterious Kingpins operations, to the dismay of Wilson Fisk.

Kingpin will be one of our main villains of the movie. In this film, Fisk will have secondary goons The Tinkerer, who you may remember from Spider-Man Homecoming, creating gear for his men:

And an enforcer, a menace hoping to one day take on even more power than he already has, Hammerhead.

Hammerhead is a brawler, who can be conniving and slimey. I want someone likable but borderline annoying. Someone who can trade blows and quips and really have some fun against Spider-Man.

Personally, I think who better than Saul Goodman himself Bob Odenkirk, but I'll leaving casting up to someone else.

After a huge fight with Hammerhead and Fisk goons, Spider-Man will be approached by a vigilante he has never seen before.

Enter the mentor. What character better to warn Peter of the dangers of balancing the vigilante life than Matt Murdock?

Unlike mentors before, Daredevil will actually be an extremely positive force for Peter. He will show him the value of balance and the danger of going too into the darkness of being a vigilante.

Daredevil will warn Spider-Man that messing with organized crime without understanding it leads to a power vacuum and desperation, which leads to more danger for civilians. Peter will not listen, which will lead to our actual big bad of the film:

Mr Negative.

Martin Li will be a young newer type of crime boss. With his inexperience will come chaos, and with his power will come war.

I do not have a casting for him, as I feel this character should be a new Chinese actor. Someone relatively young and menacing.

He is joined by his gang the Inner Demons, who will be former members of the Hand who needed a leader when the five fingers fell, and his right hand man and enforcer, The Scorpion.

Some may forget, this character was introduced in Spider-Man Homecoming played by Michael Mando, which I love immensely. I want him geared up, in the suit, using that seem fierce energy he had in his post credit scene.

Seeking to gain financially from the commotion of this gang war will be cat burglar Felicia Hardy.

If Matt is the angel on Peter's shoulder, Felicia will be the Devil on Spideys.

Felicia will also be escaping her past through her persona of The Black Cat, and will serve as temptation for Spider-Man to leave Peter Parker behind.

While she is trying to convince him to move on and just be Spider-Man, Black Cat does have Peter's best interest at heart. I want a flawed but good person here, who will round out team Spidey.

I'd like an actress who maybe feels a tad older than Peter.

My mind jumps to Anya Taylor Joy, but I'm open to suggestions.

Throughout the film, Peter will learn about balance from both Black Cat and Daredevil, how the criminal organizations came to power, and how to properly take them down to save New York.

And with all that comes the pitch:

While trying to clean up the streets Peter Parker accidentally opens the door to a gang war between super powered Mr. Negative and the dangerous Kingpin, leaving the streets of New York desperate for a hero. With the help of new allies Daredevil and the Black Cat, Spider-Man must learn what it takes to save his city.

Spider-Man Home Turf would put Peter at the center of gang war, (something we've never seen), fighting alongside Daredevil (a new mentor), and with a love interest not for Peter but for Spider-Man (a new and different love story).

It would also keep Peter in New York, something the Watts movies did not do enough of, and at the center of the best parts of the Netflix Marvel universe.

It's big enough to feel like Spider-Man, and small enough to be the start of something new.

I think Spider-Man can benefit from a smaller start. Seeing Spidey fighting on the streets of New York is all a fan really wants.

But as long as it's not the clone saga, I will be happy.

If you'd like to support me you can follow me on my socials here!

[latibvles]

BLIND DATES OC FEST 2023

something for @mercurygray ’s OC Fest, which I … conveniently remembered after restarting The Pacific. So we went with a triple whammy challenge for myself here — new OC, new “canon” character, and a different side of the war. Went into a name generator, got “Vicki Graves” and … now we’re here. Melbourne antics featuring a bar, macarons, a birthday, a selective risk-taker, and Poet’s very first attempts at writing Hoosier. Have a neat little moodboard for my girl, and then the writing is below the cut :) we’re also just short of 2k words I am so normal about her. this also took on a bit of a “Before Sunrise” feel that I’m not ??? mad about ??? anyways moving on—

It was a great camera all things considered.

The latest model — it came with a case and film in a green gift box, sitting pretty on her desk at the office that morning, with a note that read “Happy Birthday Vee ~ Lois” in bubble letters. She was promptly ambushed when she sat down — with balloons and a coffee and a bagel with jam from that bakery down the street. They crowded around her when she opened the box with the camera and the film, Lois at the front with that prideful grin and her hands on her hips.

It was a good morning. Not a bad birthday.

The music was loud, a song being carried by a marine’s not-quite-sober vibrato. He whisked Margie away with that inebriated tenor of his, his friend joined in and he had an arm around her waist as he continued to croon. The music drowned out the shutter of her camera, and the lighting wasn’t terrible either, so Vicki remained seated and observing, peering through her viewfinder and snapping a photo with a click.

She took one earlier, of Lois and the marine she’d been dancing with for the better half of the night. Lew, that’s what he said his name was, tall and broad-shouldered with a smile like trouble. But Lois looked too good in her shirtwaist dress to pass up. The camera wouldn’t capture it, but the warm yellow of it brought out the shininess of her hair, the glow to her summer-tanned skin. Vicki would give it to her tomorrow.

Years from now, she could try to imagine the yellow, and if warranted, the marine holding her too.

No dancing or trouble-making marines for her; she was reserving her courage to spend on calling her mother later, maybe, if it proved to be enough to give her that extra oomf.

Christ, Vick, she could hear Lois scolding her, clear as day. Y’wanna go take pictures of war zones but you can’t even call your own mom?

Well, she’d reply, in war zones they might not ask me if I found a boy to bring home yet. They’d just let me take the damn pictures.

And maybe it was the summer heat making the bar turn stuffy — or maybe the prospect of boyfriends and aspirations and disappointing phone conversations with mother dearest were enough to flush her face and leave her unreasonably flustered. Whatever it was, she didn’t like how Margie, all tangled up in the singing marine, would glance her way and grin, like she was concocting.

And there were far too many people around for concoctions.

Vicki rose, slipping through the excitability and alcohol-induced merriment towards the front door. She wouldn’t leave. Well, maybe she wouldn’t leave, but it was hot and stuffy and she needed air that wasn’t coupled with the hazy scent of cigarettes.

She stepped out into the cool summer night and let out a hefty sigh, the night air cooling the flush to her cheeks almost instantaneously. She could walk home — it was fifteen minutes to her apartment. The sidewalks were busy though, and she wasn’t entirely sure if she wanted to take the risk with so many strangers out and about.

She was still rotating her options when the door opened and shut again. She looked to her left.

Vicki recognized him, vaguely (as in: he’d come in with Lew and they’d approached the table, and she’d noticed the blue to his eyes, the pout to his lips, and the swagger of his walk, and even though he didn’t ask her to dance she almost wished he did).

“He ain’t givin’ her back.” He broke the silence first, his lip curling into a grin. He and Lew had a similar twang to their voices. She followed his eyes as they looked back through the window, to Lois and Lew and their goofy grins.

“First you take my cricket field, now you take my ride home,” she lamented melodramatically, letting herself put her full weight on the window. “Greedy little bunch, you Yanks.” He chuckled, looking down to pull out a cigarette and light it.

“Apologies, ma’am, if it makes up for it I’ve got good word that uh… Bud and your friend there were gettin’ ready to serenade the birthday girl ‘till she slipped away.”

“And is that good word coming from the one meant to reel her back in?” He smiled at her rhetoric, giving a lazy sort of shrug.

“It could be.”

“And does the retriever have a name or should I keep calling him Marine?” She watched as the end of his cigarette burned orange, before smoke slipped from his lips.

“I’ve also got good word it might be Bill. Smith. You wouldn’t happen to know the name of lady he’s looking for, would you?” She couldn’t help but snort at that, shaking her head slightly as the way his grin seemed to grow. She could appreciate a good showman, at the very least. Still, she hesitated for a moment.

That undeniable sort of apprehension creeped in on her. After packing up and fleeing the nest much to her mother’s dismay — she’d had a fill of… of risk-taking. And if she’d learned anything from that, risk meant fall-out and marines, it seemed, were an inherently risky bunch.

And, unfortunately, not risk in the way of action shots and front-page news, at least not on this side of the ocean.

But she could hear Margie and Lois and the girls at the office all egging her on, even if one was currently being serenaded and the other was dancing and the last of the list likely scattered to the winds with husbands and boyfriends and whomever they chose to spend their Friday nights with.

“It’s Vicki.” A pause, she stared at the cigarette before looking back at him.

“Well then sorry for forgettin’ a present, Vicki.” He put out the cigarettes on the brick, letting the butt fall with that grin still playing on his lips. Like a kid poking a bear. Or rather, a kid poking a sedated bear, maybe.

She bit the bullet.

“Could always make it up to me. Since your friend stole my escort and I’m not going back in there with this newfound information.” That caught his attention, he raised a brow.

“Well the guilt’s just eatin’ me alive over here, y’know.” She snorted again and rolled her eyes.

“There’s a bakery, fifteen minutes from here. Got good coffee too. Buy me a coffee and all’s forgiven,” She pushed herself from the wall at that point, looking at him expectantly and without skipping a beat Bill did the same, offering her arm. “Wouldja look at that? Marine’s got manners. You might be winning me over.” She didn’t miss the way his grin grew impossibly wider, like she’d just given him a gold star, or the way he rolled his eyes at the remark. She took his arm, and started a half-walk half-drag down the streets.

Bill was funny — and observant. He’d lean down, mutter something in her ear and vaguely gesture to indicate where to look and she’d end up snickering and swatting his arm. It seemed that he could find some quick-witted remark in everything they saw. Vicki could offer him tidbits: where to get a good meal, the shortcuts to cut through, which bars the RACMPs liked to frequent on their days off.

She saw a lot through her viewfinder. What good was seeing things if she couldn’t share them? Even if her note resulted in him telling a story about a handful of marines getting into a brawl at a bar.

“But not you, right? Such a fine upstanding marine wouldn’t dream of it.” And he ran his hand across his own cheek in a caress, turning this way and that to show off the lack of bruises or other signs of a fight.

“Never me. Wouldn’t dream of it.” In a way that was so drawn-out and dry that she knew he meant quite the opposite, and she could appreciate his roundabout honesty.

“Lois was doing a touristy article on small businesses on this side of the city. Needed me to come take pictures of the place, the owner and all that.” She explained as he opened the glass door for her, and they stepped inside. Then Vicki turned, made a sweeping gesture for him to step towards the counter. “Tell them Vicki’s regular. Feel free to get yourself something too.” She gave him a wink at his playfully drawn out ‘yes ma’am’ — and made her own way to the display case to peruse.

“Quite the present you’re unwrappin’ there, Vee,” she looked up at one of the cashiers, Bette, who was eyeing Bill up and down as he spoke to the other man on shift like he was a steak dinner. “Who knew you had it in ya? Think I can get a turn next?” Vicki rolled her eyes, choosing not to entertain her antics this time around. “The usual, I take it?”

“And a slice of that chocolate cake, too.”

“Oh she’s really feeling adventurous,” Bette giggled as she started to pack away a dozen macarons in a pretty pink box, and then a large cake slice in another. Vicki immediately went to fish for her wallet, but the blond held up her hand. “On the house. Happy Birthday, never say I didn’t do anything for ya, and if you don’t take him upstairs it’s double next time.”

“I miss when you were smaller and too shy to speak to me.” Vicki lamented with a faux sigh, and Bette giggled.

“And I miss when you lived a little more.” Vicki took the two boxes, found her usual table by the window and sat down. Shortly after Bill came back, with two cups and she gestured to the seat across from her.

“All is forgiven then?” He asked with a grin, before noticing the bigger box in between them. “D'aww you shouldn’t have.”

“Sit and entertain me for a while then yeah, all is forgiven.” She gave him a more contained smile, taking her own coffee cup and eyeing it for a moment before cracking open the box of macarons and plucking one of the pistachio ones from the box to pop into her mouth. She watched as he reached for the chocolate one, wordless for a moment as he ate it with a boyish grin.

She wondered what the fallout of this would be — four years she’d lived in Melbourne, with this private tradition of eating and people watching once a year after the girls brought her out for celebrations. Why she decided to break this tradition with a marine she knew so little about, she had no explanation for. Maybe it was just a way to avoid calling her mother. A temporary distraction.

Bill looked out the window, pointed at another man in dress uniform stumbling around, and his shoulders shook in suppressed laughter at the sight . It was enough to make her snicker a little.

A damn good distraction, if any.

It was his turn to ask the questions now, coupled with wise-crack remarks and the occasional grin that oozed ‘you know you wanna laugh.’ Sometimes, she’d roll her eyes in spite of the corner of her lip twitching, or hide the grin behind her coffee cup.

“Anyone tell you you’ve got a smart mouth, Bill Smith?”

“You and the entire first marines, Vicki No-Last-Name.”

“Well then that just means it holds merit, now doesn’t it?” She watched as he went to grab another macaron from the box, and she found herself reaching for the camera around her neck.

If they let her go overseas, take pictures of the war unfolding, there probably wouldn’t be many shots like this. Of men in states of content in their dress uniforms, with pretty coffee cups and clean faces and troublemaking grins. But she still wanted to see it, to get a photo that would end up on the front page of The Age and show everyone what it was like out there. If the editor was willing to take a chance on her and feed into it a little bit.

In for a Penny, she tried to rationalize, and she didn’t hesitate to snap the photo as Bill eyed her in a moment of confusion.

“What’s that for?” He asked, raising a brow. Vicki shrugged simply.

“Me. What good’s a birthday if I’ve got nothing to remember it,” she sipped her coffee, and with another contained smile, she added, “And it’s… Graves. Vicki Graves.”

[heymeowmao]

2023.01.23 - https://weibo.com/l/wblive/p/show/1022:2321324861142718873967

Xiao Ning is here to wish you a Happy New Year!!

LYN: Hallo everybody, good evening. Xiao Ning is here to wish you a Happy New Year! LYN: Happy New Year, Happy New Year.

C: How come you’re only here now? All the food’s gone cold. LYN: You can eat first, don’t wait for me. Just eat a nice meal with your family.

LYN: It’s been 26 days since I last streamed? That’s terrible- 26 days?? I haven’t been attending to my proper duties (不务正业). In that case, it really HAS been a long time since we last met (by stream).

C: My mom and dad are waiting for you so we can eat together. LYN: You’re overthinking it. Friends, it’s the new year, please have mercy on me. Let’s not make trouble for each other during the holidays. Let’s all be happy. Just spend your new year happily with your family. Have “A Good Year”.

C: Ning-ge, I’ve gone crazy thinking of you. LYN: OMG. Don’t. You’ve thought of me so much that you... gave yourself a mental illness? It’s not worth it- and I’ve been making appearances, haven’t I? I was at Jiangsu’s Spring Night last night, even.

C: You’re wearing so little, aren’t you cold? LYN: You mean the short sleeves? There’s something in this world that’s called an “air conditioner”- if you don’t know it, you can look it up. A heater. Do you.. not know that such a thing exists? Also, Ning-ge is young and hardy- I can stand the cold.

C: Why does it seem like your voice is a little hoarse? LYN: Uh... I don’t know either. Maybe it’s because I just woke up. Well, I didn’t JUST wake up- I woke up in the afternoon. I’ve just been sleeping in lately. Earlier I was filming so much there was no TIME to have a good night’s sleep; It made me so sleepy. But these past couple of days it’s the New Year Holiday and I have a few days of rest, so I’m getting my sleep in. So these dark circles get smaller. I’ve been sleeping in. Someone earlier said my voice was hoarse- why? Is it thrilling?

LYN: Many of you are asking if my foot’s alright? Honestly, I don’t even know. It’s still attached? I’m not sure what the situation is, because they didn’t give an x-ray. When they open up again, I’ll get it checked out. For now, it’s the same- the bone’s broken so I should take care of it, what else can I do? The doctors told me- you know what’s strange? Each doctor tells you something different. The first one I went to told me that I could start trying to walk on it after three months. I could use a crutch and slowly start to recover my ability to walk. The next doctor I met told me that it would take at least 6 months. “You can’t mess around with this. You should only try walking after 6 months, otherwise it will leave you with aftereffects, if it heals incorrectly.” That scared me! If I were out of commission for 6 months then that would mean all my future projects will fall through. I met yet another doctor, and they told me I needed pins. I asked them what would happen, and they said after the pins I would need three months to recover before I could walk normally. At that time I had already been resting it for half a month, and this would require me to restart at three and that’s... much. So I gave that up. After that I met ANOTHER doctor, who told me I should continue the conservative treatment and just keep it in the cast and it should be no problem. It’s all about the same- about 100 days/3 months of recovery. Because it’s true that the bone’s broken, and it’s not just a simple matter of having twisted my ankle. I broke one of the bones into three pieces. How scary. C: Does it still hurt? LYN: It doesn’t hurt anymore. I don’t really feel anything. But now my right leg is losing its ability to functionally walk. The only thing I had going for me in this industry was that I had long legs. My face, singing, and acting is all not outstanding. I only had my legs as an advantage, and now I’m currently disabled.  C: It sounds like it hurts. My heart hurts for giegie~ LYN: That’s enough of that. Don’t say useless things. What the heck is “my heart hurts for giegie~”.

C: Are you drinking milk or coconut milk? LYN: Coconut milk. I don’t much like (cow’s) milk. Usually I’ll drink yogurt.

C: Ning-ge, when you attended the Weibo Music Awards and saw the kazoo, how did you feel? [t/n: there was a short kazoo/kazoobie segment, and INTO1 were learning how to play it] LYN: I didn’t feel much of anything. They just brought out a bunch of kazoobie/kazoo on the stage. /playing with them/ I didn’t feel anything. It was... nice to see. C: Ning-ge, blow both at once. LYN: My mouth isn’t that big. There’s a distance between the two mouth holes. Sorry, my mouth isn’t big enough. LYN: That doesn’t mean I can’t try, though.

LYN: Forget it. C: Ning-ge, use a nostril to blow one. LYN: Do I have to try so hard for a stream, now? I have to start doing tricks? You want me to use my nostril to blow a kazoo. Well, how about I attach a tube to it and blow it from a distance? Have you seen those videos? They attach a tube to the suona and blow- such a long distance!- through that? Why don’t I try that, instead? Alright? I’ve got to pull out some tricks otherwise I can’t make you stay and subscribe to my weibo??

C: When will the new drama be announced? LYN: The topic changes so quickly?! You were just asking me to show you some tricks, and now you’re asking about the new drama? The new drama will be announced really soon. Of course I’ll go (be in the crew). Even if my leg is broken, I have to go. At first, like any normal person, I thought of taking some time to for my foot to heal. I didn’t NEED to pack my schedule so tightly and suffer any side effects from not resting it. But after being cursed at online for so long now, I HAVE to take whatever work comes my way, broken foot or no. If I don’t do the work, then that means I’ve been yelled at for nothing. I’d be losing out. I have to accept the work, and I have to do it well.

C: Ning-ge, what’s this bg music? LYN: Don’t butter me up. This is clearly one of my fans trying to pander to me, by asking me what this background music is. Isn’t there a rolling caption up there that keeps reminding you what the song is? This request comes across as a little fake. Next time try to make it more realistic. XD It’s auto-scrolling up there, “Modern Brothers Liu Yuning - A Good Year is currently playing.”

LYN: ! The Carnation Music Festival... I know I said I would hold another one, but you know there was a pandemic situation in Hengdian, and then I had to go to Macau. I was leaving, so I didn’t ask them (bandmates) to come over. Also, Ah-Zhuo had COVID, at the time. I didn’t want him to come over and give it to me, and then I wouldn’t have been able to go to Macau. After that I came back, before the new year and had some filming and events to do... and now it’s the new year. The day before the new year, I even recorded an OST. But this (new) drama should be ok. I won’t be as busy as I was when filming YNGS. I had too many scenes in that, I almost died. This one should be about half the amount of scenes than I had for YNGS. I’ll have time to stream and make some songs, maybe do a variety show. It’s possible, but I can’t say for sure. C: How come your voice changed? (it got gentler) LYN: Is it because we haven’t met in too long? You’ve started missing me, so you feel like I’ve changed. Maybe it’s because I haven’t spoken in too long, so you think my voice has changed? But also my voice is just a little hoarse. Just a little.

- /commenting that the special b-day drone performance they made for him was very nice/ LYN: Anyone who was in Hengdian all sent me messages about it. It gave me a lot of face. Thank you, everyone. The directors, actors, anyone who was in Hengdian at the time all sent me messages about it- “Liu Yuning, look what your fans did for you.” It was cool. You made me look good.

C: How many dishes do you eat for new year’s? LYN: /sigh/ The new year.... I ate bullfrogs (??). I bought a pot of bullfrogs to eat. I hope everything that happens in the year to come will come “gwa gwa” (smoothly).

C: Ning-ge, do you have any skin brightening tips? LYN: Am I a makeup streamer?? Why are you asking me how to get lighter skin on at this time, during the holidays? If I had a method, do you still think I would be so dark?? For lighter skin, just remember to supplement with Vitamin C and try not to go out. Close the curtains so that you’re not getting hit by the sun. If you go out make sure to wear enough clothing to cover up. The more you wear, the whiter you’ll be. Another method is to... rely on the beauty filters. The fastest way to be paler is to turn on a beauty filter. You’ll be a celebrity in an instant. Don’t think about those beauty products- this way you’ll see results much faster!

C: Ning-ge, I’m a student-fan and I want to cross the oceans to see you. LYN: Since you’re a student, you should just focus on your studies. My last batch of student-fans all graduated already. They all already graduated, so I guess you must be part of a new group of fans. Study hard and then get a good job. After you find a job and are making a decent amount of money to support yourself, then you can come and see one of my concerts. You’re in school now, so why do you want to see me? Am I a monkey? Don’t come. You can watch my dramas and variety shows when they air, and listen to my songs when I release them- that’s enough. You can come to see me when I’m holding a concert.

C: Will you have a concert this year? LYN: I really want to, I do, but with this type of thing it’s really too hard to say. If I can’t hold one this year then next year... I’ll hold one? Let me tell you why. For the current drama, I’ll probably be filming until June and by then half a year’s gone by already. If I don’t accept another drama offer for the second half of the year... then that means I’ll have to have been working on releasing my album while I film the current drama, since I can’t hold a concert without having done that first. Then there are the rehearsals and the logistics of it all, which would take until October to finish, and I can only hold a concert then. Just... we’ll see. We’ll see, okay? LYN: I was originally planning on holding my concert this year, because right now- to say it plainly- I have five dramas waiting to be aired. I was thinking I could take a year to rest, and shoot one drama this year and leave the rest of my time to my concert. But then I heard news that all five of my pending dramas will air in 2023. The YNGS producer jiejie told me she thinks YNGS will air this year. What?! ALL FIVE of my dramas will air THIS YEAR?? If that’s the case then I don’t have any backup stock. I would only have the one I am currently going to shoot, and then nothing else. Isn’t that- that would ruin me. It took me two years to shoot five dramas, and they’re all going to air in the same year. So then I was thinking I should probably accept another drama for the later half of the year, and then at least I would have two dramas as backup. That seems a little more rational, to me. LYN: In this industry if you don’t show up in front of people, you’re likely to be forgotten. So you have to think your plans through.

C: Ning-ge, you were sitting next to rappers at the Weibo Music Awards. Did you make friends with any of them? LYN: I didn’t really speak with them all that much. I only spoke to GAI, who was sitting next to me, briefly. I didn’t really get to converse with any others. Other people are up on stage performing, and you want me to sit in the audience making friends? That’s no good. LYN: When I went initially I didn’t feel much, but later I started to feel like a monkey. I don’t really like people to see me when I am vulnerable- it’s not because I want to save face or because of my idol burden- I don’t have such a burden. I just don’t like people to see me in such a poor state. Everyone else there is wearing nice suits and pretty gowns and I’m over there in a wheelchair. I’m just cruising around in my electric wheelchair, and every artist who sees me stops me to ask what’s wrong. I say, “It’s nothing. I just broke my foot while filming. It’ll be fine in a couple months.” And when I turn around it’s someone else asking me what’s wrong. It was a weird situation, because we’re all here at a MUSIC awards ceremony. I go, and I’m telling them I got hurt while ACTING. LYN: What am I (singer or actor)?? If I said I got hurt while holding a concert, it wouldn’t be as strange. But here I am at a music awards ceremony, surrounded by singers, telling them I hurt myself while acting. That’s strange. The second thing is- everyone is looking at me, and they see me and they’re very polite- wishing I recover soon. The third thing is my own projection- how must they see me? “How much did this kid want to attend this awards ceremony, that he comes even with a broken foot?? You’re already in this state. You should be home resting, what are you doing here??? How narcissistic are you, that you have to come here and bask in the honor of receiving your award?” That was just too awkward/embarrassing.

- /Daimi is barking/ LYN: ... What do you want?! LYN: She’s outside. I’ll let her in later.

C: Ning-ge, you make the boot look so fashionable. LYN: What are you talking about? But also- my old fans all know- no matter what I do/buy it has to be the best. I’ve always thought that I even if I am not that skilled, I should have the best equipment to make up for what I lack. For example, when I was learning how to play the guitar, I bought an expensive one... even though I can’t play it. Even if I broke a bone, I bought so much equipment for it. My friend sent me a chair you can sit in, in the bath. I also have these.. crutches... that you can set your elbows on, like a walker/frame- my friend sent me this, too. I have crutches (under the armpit)- two sets. The first set was a little short, it came from the hospital and did not match with my physique. At the longest extension it only reached my waist. So I went online and bought another pair- it can extend all the way to 2m, so it’s enough for me. I also have a wheelchair, two actually. When I first broke the bone I had bought a wheelchair, but after using it for a bit I didn’t like how it felt. When I was on set and my bros were pushing me around it felt like a struggle. So I went online and bought another one- an expensive one, for 3,000+ RMB. The frame was lighter and the wheels better, so it felt more convenient for me to get around set with. And then, I have to go out, right? I didn’t want someone to have to push me because I’d look really miserable, so I got an electric wheelchair. LYN: Then, I have this on my foot. When I was at the hospital, the doctor gave me this boot and I spent 600RB on it. After it was on... I thought it was cool. XD I was wondering if there was any talented individual online who had this boot, but made it look like Iron Man’s boot or something? So I went online to search if there was anyone with this creativity and sense of fashion. It’d be cool and it would protect my foot/leg- I wouldn’t need to feel embarrassed for the Spring Night Galas. I was searching and then discovered a problem. This boot that I have on, the hospital sold to me for 600RMB. Online, it’s 149RMB. I had a mental break. Suddenly I felt as if this thing wasn’t as reliable as I first thought it was. If it was 600RMB and could guarantee the safety of my leg I wouldn’t complain, but it’s so cheap I could just go online and find a better one! But there wasn’t any Iron Man boot. So I was searching and found something online for 500+RMB... if that’s the case I’m sure the hospital would have sold it to me for 1000+RMB, right? Anyway, I bought it... but it wasn’t comfortable. It’s sitting over there, like new. So what could I do... I went back to the original one I got from the hospital. But this thing, wearing it every day, it gets dirty. Also, you know, your foot’s bundled up in it, so... (it smells). There’s no way to wash it, because if I do I wouldn’t be able to use it the next day, and I need it to get to work. I can’t wash this one, so I thought of getting a replacement so I could use them interchangeably. I looked online... and that’s how I have the one I’m wearing now. This is the brand that all the big athletes use when they get injured. The imported brands, you know? So I thought it would suffice and I bought it. I’m full-up on equipment. I even bought a single forearm crutch, the kind that old folks use. And then... I bought the wrong thing. Everyone, crutches are categorized into left-handed and right-handed support. I don’t know if you buy crutches, but they’re separated by left or right. So, my right foot is hurt and I bought the right-handed crutch, to make my hand work in place of my foot. But when I got back it was then that I realized that if it’s my right leg that’s hurt I should have gotten the crutch for the left hand. I bought the wrong one, and I haven’t returned it. It’s just taking up space in my house, now. Later when I’m fully healed I’ll take all this equipment and raffle it off to you. Friends, when that time arrives, you have to come and participate.

C: Ning-ge, talk about the purple thermals. LYN: What’s there to talk about? They’re just purple. That’s normal. In Dongbei we have all sorts of colors. Usually when I’m shooting a drama, I’ll be wearing the character’s wardrobe. But for some time prior to that I kept recording douyin videos- I mean videos to upload to weibo, right? The drama’s pr department asked me if I could stop wearing the drama wardrobe, because I had been essentially leaking the look. Paparazzi are one thing, since it’s taken without our permission, but we can’t actively reveal the details ourselves. I thought that logic was sound, so I respected their request. So when I recorded that video I had taken off the robes and was wearing the purple thermals underneath.  C: Did you get them from HZT? LYN: Yeah. // No, really though. That was just a coincidence. I didn’t even learn about it until after I had uploaded the video.

LYN: Wait for me a sec, I want to change my cup. Or, let me go wash this one. Hold on. I’ll play you a video. Let me go wash my cup. It feels like it’s sticking in my throat. So there it is- I’ve found the reason why m voice sounds different! It’s because this thing (coconut milk) is sticking in my throat. Wait for me; I’ll wash my cup. LYN: I’m back! C: Drink less soft drinks. LYN: This is sugar free.

C: Ning-shushu (uncle), I start school on the 30th. LYN: Who are you calling “uncle”?? Even if you call me that, I’m still not giving you any money. School starts on the 30th? Then, study well. That way when you leave the house you’ll have learned how to interact with people and the ways of the world. School may not be able to teach you these things but your Uncle Ning can- worldly wisdom. When you see someone who obviously looks much older than you, first call them “ge” or “jie”. When they start to seem annoyed, then you can change to calling them something else. Whenever I see a woman who is older than me- I don’t care by how much- I always call them “jie”. If they are slightly older, I will call her “da jie”; if they are just normally older than me, I just call her “jie”. LYN: They’re all “jie” to me, because I used to be in the customer service industry. I was a waiter at a restaurant, and then later a clerk in a clothing store. You can think about it- if you have a group of older customers walk into your shop, are you going to say, “Hey, Uncle. What will you be having today?” If it’s a woman- “Auntie, what will you have today?” You’re going to make them lose their appetite! Do you get it? They’re going to lose their appetite, turn and find a different establishment. When I was working in the clothing shop and a woman comes in, do you think I would say, “Hello, Auntie. What type of clothing were you looking to buy today?” Do you think she would buy anything from me? I must be crazy. You’re in school now, so I completely understand why you don’t have this etiquette, but you must understand how the world works. If a woman walks in, no matter how old she looks, you say, “Jie, what type of clothing are you looking for today? Jie, you look to be in good spirits! Jie, try this one- I guarantee it will make you look slim. With an aura like yours, only you could pull off this color. Really, jie. It’ll look so good on you. It’s really nice. Why don’t you buy it?” See- this is worldly wisdom. C: What if they’re younger than you? LYN: Then I don’t call them by any title. Do you think, if someone younger than me walked in, I would say, “Meimei, what are you looking at today~?” No way. Also, I don’t like to call anyone “美女 (mei nu)” (beauty/pretty lady). People who are trying to sell you clothes will often call you “pretty lady”- I have never called anyone that. It’s too difficult for me. I don’t call them any title, but use “您 (nin)” (polite form of “you”). We’re on equal footing- I don’t need to make myself any lower than them. -- C: Meimei is watching you today. LYN: Go on, then. -- C: Call them “Miss/Lady (小姐)”. LYN: I don’t like that either. Other people can use that term as they like, but for me it seems improper. If I were younger I could call someone “Young Lady”, but I’m so old and for me to call a young girl “young lady”?? What do I want?? C: Call her “Old Miss (老妹)”. LYN: I don’t think anyone would use that, right? It’s like this- “老妹” is used as a more casual term, but as someone who has to represent the shop, we have to- to some extent- raise the profile of the shop. If you call someone “老妹”, it’ll be like they came into our shop to buy a cotton-padded jacket. It feels like, “Hey, sis. Come into my shop- take a look at the cotton-padded jackets and thermals.” So if you are a salesperson, you have represent your brand and give it a higher profile- even if not by much. You just can’t let the profile fall (lower than that of the customer’s). So then in this case we would use the term “女士 (Madam/Ms.)”. You can take her to look at some furs. XD C: Then just call her “woman” (女人) LYN: LOL. Women can call each other that among themselves, but me- as a male- calling a female that... is extremely off-putting. I don’t think “woman” should come out of a man’s mouth. It feels like, “Woman. This is a notice, not up for discussion. Give me all of your information in three minutes.” “Woman, you’re playing with fire.” /laughs/ “Alright- you’ve got my attention.” // “Woman, you’re playing with fire, but you’ve successfully gained my attention. Have dinner with me tonight. This is a command, not a request.”

- /BGM: Mosaic Band’s 霓虹甜心 (Darling)/

LYN: I’m drinking a soft drink, not wine! Who would be crazy enough to drink wine on a live-stream? I’d be insane. My alcohol tolerance is already bad enough as is, I don’t want to drink and say the wrong thing. I already have to watch what I say. I’m having a soft drink; it’s sugar-free. 

C: Ning-ge, did you go to Li Gengxin’s salon for a haircut? LYN: I really did. I told you before, right? That I had gone to a place in Changsha for a haircut and it happened to be one of his shops? When he found out that I went, he sent me a (membership) card. I hadn’t finished using up the funds on it, so I went to exhaust them a little. I can’t waste his good intentions. C: How much money do you have left on it? LYN: Why, are you going to use it?? You want me to tell you the number and you’ll go get your hair washed? You’ll get a perm, using my card?? As if! “Woman, you’re dreaming. I suggest you end this line of thought early.” LYN: How would I know how much money is left on the card- where would I even look that up? Look- this is another part of worldly wisdom (人情世故) that you don’t understand. You really need someone like me in your life (to teach you these things). Someone gave you a (gift) card, and you turn around and look up how much money is on it?? Do you know how to conduct yourself?? No one does that. When you enter society and your coworker gives you a gift, PLEASE do not look up how much that gift cost them. Don’t do that, there’s really no need. It doesn’t have anything to do with how much the item costs. Someone gave that to you with their good intentions. Someone gives you a card, and you’re going to look up whether they gave you 1000RMB or 2000RMB? That’s very strange. Don’t look it up. Later on when I want to get a haircut and they tell me that there are no more funds left, all I’ll have to do it add more funds to it. End of story. C: I have to give them something back. // I’ll look it up secretly. LYN: A return gift? That’s okay, then. If you’re going to give something back, then you DO understand the concept of worldly wisdom. If you’re not going to give anything in return then don’t bother looking up the cost. If someone gives me a card, what am I going to do? The most is send them a box of strawberries. If your friend gives you something and you look up the price of it in order to give them back something of equal value, then that’s okay. If it’s a birthday present though, there’s no need.

C: Ning-ge, if you see my comment, make a “V”! LYN: Do our interactions have to be so strong, now? The participation is so intense?!

C: Ning-ge, I want to ask- is the boot that’s supporting your foot breezy? LYN: It’s fine. The air doesn’t really get through to it. Because it has to wrap around entirely- I don’t know if you’ve seen racing seats? If it wraps around the driver it’s safer. Or.. you know when you go snowboarding, you have snow boots- it’s like that. It has the same function, in that it does not allow your ankle to bend. It limits your movement up and down, left and right. You’ll know what this feels like if you’ve ever gone snowboarding before.

C: Ning-ge, have you seen my house’s remote control? LYN: /looks around/ I haven’t. For my part, I suggest your call the police. Make sure they catch who stole it.

C: Ning-ge, did you buy your “young king young boss” (YKYB) cap on your own? LYN: This brand is HZT’s, and someone is asking me if I took the initiative to buy it on my own? Do you think our relationship as friends is so terrible, that I need to go out and make this purchase? Of course it is great to go out and support his brand, but we’re pretty good in that when he has new products he will remember to send me something- like a cap or jacket.

--

C: Man, will you sing? LYN: Woman, what song would you like to hear. Tell me within three minutes.

C: Ning-ge, respect winter. LYN: I’m at home! I have an air conditioner, so I’m not really cold. If I were cold I would put something on. I’m alright. I’m not cold.

LYN: I discovered recently that my Ten album is up on QQ Music. That was my first album. Friends, if you have time you can go on QQ and listen to it. It’s a very nice album. Let me look it up. I’ll see if there’s any song I can sing. 

LYN: I’ll sing one of my own songs. It’s called “A Ray of Light in the Darkness”. I hope that this year everyone can meet their “light”. Be your own light. - 黑夜的一束光 (A Ray of Light in the Darkness/Praying) LYN: Another! What should I sing? These are all songs on my first album... // I’ll sing this for you. This song is called “Contrary” (lit. = “Obviously”). - 明明 (Obviously/Contrary)

C: Man, you’re playing with fire. LYN: /chuckles/ Alright, then. You sure do learn things from my stream, don’t you? Even though this thing is not useful at all, but you sure can follow along.

LYN: Did I not sing some of the lyrics properly? Then that just proves that I’m really singing. Sometimes when you see my performances and I make a mistake in the lyrics, I do it to prove that I’m actually singing live. Even though I sing just averagely without proving myself, I still need to prove it.

C: Will there be a Carnation Music Festival this year? LYN: Yes. I had big plans for this. I wanted to make a home-style music festival. It would be at my house and I would call a bunch of instrumentalists over. I would hold a little concert in my house and stream it to weibo. It’s just that the problem was that there were too many things going on before the new year. I was thinking of doing it on January 8th, for my birthday. But then... then I had too many scenes to shoot for YNGS. I thought I had better focus on my acting. If I can, I still want to make it happen this year. When my foot’s better too, I need to take you to Shanghai Disney for a stream. I’ll give back everything I owe you. C: Look at this pie! LYN: I see a lot of you are commenting that I’m drawing another pie, that you have too many of my pies in your fridge already and that they’re starting not to fit. XD BUT! If I give you enough pies, then at least SOME of them have to come true, right? We can make it happen. LYN: “Man, you’re making empty promises again.”

C: Ning-ge, can I bring my baby? LYN: ?! Wh- which part are you referring to? I was talking about two things earlier: one was the concert in my house- you don’t need to bring your baby for that. You can watch that from the comfort of your own home, just watch my stream from your phone. The second thing was the Disney stream, and by that I didn’t mean that I was going to (physically) bring fans to the park to play. I meant I was going to stream myself- which you can watch from your phone. You can watch it with your baby, though. My stream does not contain any adult/illegal content. People 18 years and under can still watch my stream. You can watch it with your baby, that’s okay.

--

C: Have you heard any news about ALZ? LYN: I’ve really got to hand it to you. Of course, I know you all ask because you’re interested in me, and at the very least you know that I am a part of the drama. But, I still have to say: I don’t know if you’re my fan or not- but as an actor, I really don’t know much more than you do. That is- I don’t know. I don’t know when it will air. I can tell you that I’ve already finished recording the OST and I’ve finished my voice-acting for it; I’ve even gone in for some post-editing OS. My part is done. As an actor, I’ve finished my job. But on this same note, taking all this into consideration, my guess is that it should be airing soon. I can’t say for sure though because again, my part is done. From my past experience, after the OST and voice-acting are finished, the air date is not long after. C: Ning-ge, what’s the difference between OS and OST? LYN: They’re two different things. OS (voice-over/narration) is- for example if you’re watching a drama and in this scene a lone person is sitting with a letter in front of them. They pick up the letter and at this moment, there’s a voice: “Hello, Liu Yuning. By the time you see this letter, I will have already left.” This sound is called the OS- the sound you hear in the background.

--

C: Ning-ge, it’s Hei Ye’s birthday. LYN: It’s Hei Yanjing’s birthday today? I can’t represent this role- and people online have been saying this too. I’ve only had the honor of being a part of this role, to bring him to life a little, but I can’t say that I /AM/ him. I’m not worthy. LYN: I said I wasn’t worthy and some people are saying, “You’re right.” /laughs the pain away/ ARE YOU REALLY MY FANS?? You can choose not to say anything at all, just don’t reply. I said I was honored to be a part of this character but I wasn’t worthy of representing the role and people agreed with me. Just don’t say anything at all. LYN: You all are brutally honest, aren’t you.

C: Ning-ge, sing 冥冥有声 (Ming Ming You Sheng). This is an order. LYN: You mean it’s Hei Ye’s birthday today, so you want me to sing a song, is that it? If it’s my birthday, shouldn’t someone else be singing for ME? Or is it because I said I wasn’t worthy? Didn’t I already sing it earlier-  你是黑夜的一束光 (you are a ray of light in the night) --> 你是黑爷的一束光 (you are Hei Ye’s ray of light).

LYN: Let me see if there’s the accompaniment for it. - /searching for the track but finds that QQ doesn’t have it and the other site does not have copyright/ LYN: Where’s the copyright for it?? This is strange, what’s happening. They won’t let me listen to the song. Sorry, friends. I was going to sing it for you but it’s just not in the stars. They won’t let it play. Really. How terrible. I don’t know how this happened. I guess something happened with the copyright- it’s not important. I can play the MV... C: It’s because you’re not a member. LYN: 去你的! Friends, you don’t know but my Kugou Music account will be open until I’m 90. If I can’t live until then, it will be passed down. My old friends all know that I’ll have it until I’m 90- that’s how much I love music. But there’s nothing I can do for this situation. I really did want to sing it for you.

C: Sing it without accompaniment. LYN: /laughs/ You’re like my second aunt. C: Ning-ge, you’re a singer aren’t you? Sing it without accompaniment. LYN: Let me see if I have it on my computer. But I’ve changed it recently- this one is not the same one as before- so I don’t know if I do, but I used to. // I don’t have it. I really wanted to sing this for you, but I can’t. I know I have the track on a USB; I’ll have one of my staff bring it to me. Let me ask.  LYN: Alright, then I won’t sing it. Maybe next time.

LYN: Let me use the restroom and I’ll come back and continue chatting with you. Wait for me, three minutes.

--- break #1

C: Ning-ge, you’re so funny when speaking the Northeastern Dialect. LYN: Actually, I can speak Standard Mandarin- I speak it when I’m filming don’t I?

- /flaps his hand to prove he’s washed them/ C: Man- have you washed your hands. LYN: Woman, you’re playing with fire. What business is it of yours if I’ve washed my hands or not? LYN: Are we role-playing a dominating CEO now? You’ll find that all dominating CEOs have to have a rising tone. /showing the difference between normal speaking tone and lowered tone/ Once you raise the intonation you’ll feel like it’s dominating. You can’t only think of the lines (but also the execution). /demonstrates again/ Do you know why this is? It’s because it comes across as a sort of command. It feels like the everyone in the world owes you something. -/playing around with it more/

C: Ning-ge, did you sing the OST for Chong Zhi? LYN: Of course. Chaoyue gave me the opportunity, didn’t she? Then as a return gift, I sent her a box of strawberries. In order to show my gratitude. LYN: The song is really nice, though. I heard the demo and thought it was really good. You can look forward to it. // I’ve sung quite a few OSTs lately- all of the dramas are quite good as well. LYN: If I had a small wish for this year it’s that one of my drama OSTs can make it big this year, too. I’ve found out that my own songs aren’t really popular, but my OSTs don’t do too bad. I have a few popular ones- Rang Jiu, I don’t even need to mention. Of course I know that the song is popular, not me. I’m only the singer- the song was good to begin with. There’s Rang Jiu, and then the year before last was Tian Wen. Last year was Searching for You. My OSTs tend to be more popular. For OSTs, as long as the drama does well, the soundtrack won’t rate too badly. - /also mentions Fireworks and Stars, Colored Glass, A Dream of Splendor/ LYN: For this year I’ve sung for Chong Zhi and ALZ... I’ve sung for mostly good dramas, up until now. Let’s all look forward to when those air. C: What about Zi Chuan? LYN: I sang for ZC, of course. Anything I’ve been in, I’ve pretty much all sung for.

C: Ning-ge, I haven’t finished my homework yet and school is about to start. LYN: Get working, then. But isn’t it early for school? Doesn’t it start in March? Do your homework.

LYN: Am I trending? “Woman- am I trending?” “Really?” “Oh, my goodness. How unbelievable.” “I never thought a day like this would come for me, LYN.” LYN: Someone had asked me before, if I had an English name. I didn’t, really. My English name is “LYN”- shorthand for “Liu Yu Ning”. Then... I’ll be “LYN” (pronounced: li-en). LYN: In the Entertainment tab? /this is not a .jpg/ What’s wrong with that?? // That’s okay, too. It’s alright, it doesn’t matter. I’m happy to be trending at all, given it’s the new year.

C: Ning-ge, have you fallen into a role? LYN: No, sometimes I just like to imitate other’s voice acting productions. Just playing around with it. A long time ago- do you remember, I went on a variety show called My Brilliant Masters? We went around to a lot of amazing seniors. At the time I had only just started acting- I was shooting my second drama- I think it was around the time I was filming for Ultimate Note. I forget. We went around to a lot of different laoshi, and one of them was Wang Gang. He’s an amazing actor, you know? So I asked him, what did I need to do if I wanted to be a good actor? They’re seniors in the industry, so I asked for advice. We talked for a long time and he told me a lot. But there’s one thing that I remember the clearest. He told me, “As an actor, the script is the most important. As long as your lines are good, your acting will not be bad.” That’s what he told me, and since then I’ve spent a little more effort on my lines. I came to enjoy it. He told me he was working at a broadcasting station, and every night he would tell a story- that’s how he practiced reciting his lines. That’s why when you watch him, his lines sound so great. It came from those years of experience for him. That’s why I came to like voice-acting. LYN: I’m still not good enough yet. I still have to practice. Standard Mandarin is the first hurdle. My Standard is not that great yet. After that it’s even more complicated things. The only thing I can do for now is to voice-act for myself, and take it slow. His is one of my more favorite stories.

C: Ning-ge, you’re making an EP with five friends? LYN: You all saw that interview, huh? I really am planning on making one with five friends. But I’ve only thought of four so far. I want to make an EP with five friends... but I think this project will be long in the making. I haven’t even found enough songs for my own album, let alone finding songs I can sing with others. I’ve already discussed it though, and reached out to five friends. You know I only have so many. I’ll collab with them and make five songs. I think we can do it. C: Which five friends? LYN: I only have so many, you can ponder on this yourselves. I only have so many. LYN: Right now, releasing a song means having to pay money (not make money). So I just want to make something for fun. It’s not for the money. I just want to do something fun with my friends and leave something behind that you all can listen to. It’s not to make any money, this is a losing venture. This is the reason why singers don’t release albums- it costs too much money. Singers used to make money by... forget it, I won’t tell you.

C: Ning-ge, I’m also your friend. LYN: Right. I always say that my fans are my friends. So by this you mean that you want to make a song with me? It’s not impossible. We can do it. How about this. You don’t have to sing, I’ll just add your name to the credits. You can pretend that your voice is in there, but you don’t have to sing. I’ll add in your name. C: We’re your friends from all over the world. ( 五湖四海 = five river and four seas) LYN: That’s right. In my next song I’ll have it down as “Singers: Liu Yuning & LYN’s Fans from All Over the World”. I’ll put your name down, and you can brag to your family about it. “Look mom, I collaborated with LYN on a song!” And when she asks you which word you sang, you can tell her it’s not important. “I’m the sound of the guitar.” XD

C: Ning-ge, what should I do if I don’t want to get out of bed? LYN: You must be sick! You’re going to come ask me about any mundane thing now?? I can’t cure you. What should you do if you can’t get out of bed? Go to sleep earlier. If you go to sleep earlier, you would be able to get out of bed easier. If you’re sleeping 12 hours a day I don’t believe you would still be able to stay in it. Go to bed earlier- if you don’t have enough sleep you won’t even be able to lie down, then you’ll just get up again. Don’t stay up at night.

C: Is TXJ going to air soon? LYN: That will be slower to air. It’s still early for that one, because I haven’t finished my voice acting for it yet. I owe them so much work... The other time I went I only did five episodes, because I just so happened to be there for work on ALZ. After I finished up with ALZ I still had some time so I asked if I could work on TXJ a little. I finished five episodes. There are... still a lot to go. Let’s not rush.

C: Is your foot alright now? LYN: It’s not healed yet, not that quickly. It’ll take at least another month and a half. In another month and a half I’ll try walking on it normally. I’ve also discussed with the drama director, if we could arrange all of the fight scenes for later so we can shoot those when my foot is better. I was given the ‘OK’ for that, so we’ll just shoot the lighter scenes to begin with. Guzhuang dramas can’t really do without any fight scenes, though. They always fight. It could be a lot of fighting or a little, but they always fight. My best role was Luo Mingxi’s (ALZ)- he was a scholar, and couldn’t do martial arts. The whole drama he didn’t have a single fight scene. I was so happy, to be in a guzhuang where I didn’t have to fight. 

--

LYN: I’ve been shooting dramas for a few years now and as time goes by I’ve realized that I really didn’t respect my own appearance before. Before, and even when I was doing the voice acting for ALZ, I was thinking, why was I so... how should I say this... so lax with myself. Even with Heroes- you’ll find that in some scenes I look pretty handsome, I actually look pretty decent. But then in other scenes I look truly ugly. When I was watching ALZ (while voice acting for his scenes) I even had that impression of myself. I look good in one scene, but ugly in another. So then I was wondering how this happened- why does it happen and when? It really has to do with your own condition that day. For example if you wake up in the morning after having stayed up all night you’ll have dark circles and be puffy from fluid retention. Your jawline won’t be as prominent. Through the camera this all looks even worse- it emphasizes your flaws. I keep saying I was swollen, but the truth of it is I had eaten too much (read: he was fat). LYN: As an actor, you can’t really show yourself in a healthy state. That’s my own personal opinion. If you want to be on camera and look pretty and refined, you really have to show yourself in an unhealthy state. It makes you seem like you have a thin face and thin body, like you’re lacking in water. If you’re on the camera glowing and healthy, then you tend to look a little plump through the lens. It’s terrible.

LYN: At the time I was “swollen” every day. I forget who told me- a way to remedy this was to tie my ears with a rubber band. That if I held my ears it would lessen the water retention. Have you heard of such a method? There are all sorts of artists’ rumored beauty tips. So I tied my ears, every day, so much so that I thought that my ears would fall off! But did it work? It actually did. Let me tell you why- I’ve thought about the reasoning behind it. LYN: It’s because when there’s a band on your ears it has the effect of making your face look slimmer. Watch. /demonstrates/ It makes your face look slimmer because it’s lifting your skin a little. Since you’re tying it fairly tight it lifts the skin, and then you think it’s working because your face looks thinner. But this is extremely temporary. After some extent it won’t work anymore. You’ll be fat either way. LYN: That’s why for Ning Yuanzhou I really have to thank all the people who complained that I was ugly in the early days of filming. I thank them, truly. From the first day of filming there were people complaining that I was ugly. They cursed at me daily, as if I had never appeared in this capacity as an actor, or on a variety show, or had ever attended a gala, or had EVER shown my face outside of this one acting appearance before. It’s as if they had never met me. Like, “Wow, it turns out that LYN was THIS ugly??” So I thank these small friends for cursing at me, because their constant cursing made me hyper-vigilant. When I got to the makeup room in the morning, I would first put on a hydrating face mask and then follow-up by massaging (with a roller) my face. First make it big. Then, follow that up with a scraper, and watch the water retention slip away. After that, a cooling eye mask- to reduce the swelling of my eyes. After all this, twenty minutes have passed and the wig application is pretty much finished, so they can then start applying the makeup. For the first twenty minutes of every day, I went through this routine: massage for 10, scrape for 5, and cool for 5. C: Did it work? LYN: I don’t dare to say that it did. You can watch the video later on and let me know. Of course, there were some times that I was lazy. When YNGS airs, if you think Ning-ge looks handsome for this episode, and this scene, then you can be sure that I scraped my face in the morning. If in some other scene his face is lacking, then he was lazy that day. You can use this method to tell the difference.

--

LYN: I really want to thank those who cursed at me, from the bottom of my heart. If it weren’t for them, I wouldn’t have felt so wary. I would have continued thinking, “An actor is an actor- the performance is what matters.” But the appearance... if I am comparing with others then there is always going to be someone out there better looking. Also, there are so many good looking people online and people say even THEY’RE ugly. So I thank these people for making me focus on my own appearance- not only in the drama. If I hadn’t experienced this for myself, I would not have had this growth, and would have continued on in my lackadaisical ways. C: Will you get angry if I curse at you now? LYN: What’s there to be angry about. People have already cursed me out, you came too late.

LYN: Also, do you know why I’ve debuted for almost four years and in those years have not really had a break? I’ve never said I wanted a break or that I would take two months off to rest. I have never said I wanted that. Even when the pandemic first started, I just entered into a drama crew. That was when I was shooting for The Long Ballad. Why (have I never taken a break)? It’s to thank those people who cursed at me. (t/n: Out of spite, you mean? XD) From the very first day, when I said I was a singer and they didn’t think I was worthy, until the day I started acting and they said I wasn’t worthy. It’s because they cursed at me and looked down on me, that I have the determination to keep moving forwards and upwards. These four years.. have gone by awfully quick.  LYN: If it were just my fans buttering me up every day- telling me I that I’m the best and the most handsome, that my acting is superb and my singing is great- if it were just my fans complimenting me all the time, I’m sure I would have drifted. I would be out there playing around instead. Why would I still be filming, when my foot is broken? Right? So I thank the haters. If they hadn’t told me I wasn’t worthy, I wouldn’t have had the strength to keep fighting without a rest. I haven’t taken a rest- you all know this.

C: Then, should we (fans) leave? The fans’ compliments aren’t important? LYN: That’s not what I meant. I’m sure if I ONLY had antis cursing at me I would have lost my mind by now. This is just like life- you can’t have shitty days ALL THE TIME, right? Let’s say you like to eat sweets. But if you add in something bitter every once in a while, you will appreciate the sweetness all the more. Right? You can’t only eat bitter things all the time! You would have thrown up, in that case. It’s like this. I really do want to thank my fans. If it weren’t for your encouragement and support, I would have had a breakdown in the face of all this hate. I’d have depression. It’s possible.  But it’s thanks to your encouragement, in hand with all the hate- that allows me to keep moving forward. LYN: I was thinking about this a couple days ago. I’m really thankful for all my fans, and I’m not just saying this. The great thing about you all is that you actually listen to what I say to you. When I tell you not to do this or that, you really do listen to me. You respect me. But because I’ve met fans that don’t listen, that makes me like you all the more. I’m grateful that I have you fas my fans. When I tell you something, you’re really willing to listen to me. Some fans don’t. They seriously, don’t. But you all respect me, and I appreciate it. Even my staff members, they think you’re all great. It’s because we have something to compare you with. LYN: Including when I’m at the airport, and I’ve told you to be conscious of being in a public space and not to come greet me, you listened. Or when I’m online and I’m trying to have a heart-to-heart and discuss something with you, you all know that I’m being serious. You all respect me. I think this is great. Because I respect all of you. If I have any news, I always tell you in the group chat. I hope that I can be transparent with you. If there’s something going on I want to be able to tell it to you straight; all you have to do is trust me. So, I’m really grateful for you.

LYN: In this industry, I don’t really have a competitor- because I’m not worthy of having one. I was chatting with a jiejie the other day, and she was wondering if there was anyone in this industry that overlapped with me. Someone that could be seen as my competitor. She didn’t think there was one. Because I’m not even in the same race track as everyone else. I stream, I sing, I act- there’s pretty much no one else out there doing all three. I don’t really have any competition, so I am a bit of a unique existence. But I don’t want to be like everyone else. I don’t want to interact with you all or work in this industry the same way as everyone else does. That’s why I wish for my fans to be different from everyone else’s as well. Let’s not carry any ill-intent. If there’s something that makes others happy, we can learn from it. But please, let us not become malicious. I don’t want us to become like them. If that happens, what will make us different? LYN: Also, I’ve been a cook!

- /sneezing/ LYN: Who’s talking smack about me? When I was little I heard the grown-ups say that if you sneeze twice in a row then that means someone is cursing you. I was being so honest with you, and you have the gall to curse at me?! What the heck... C: It means someone is thinking of you. LYN: THREE sneezes means someone is thinking of you. I remember hearing the elders said: 1 sneeze means someone mentioned you, 2 sneezes means someone is cursing you, 3 sneezes means someone is thinking of you. I think that’s how it went. C: Then, sneeze again. LYN: No~ LYN: “Woman, you’re playing with fire. I suggest you restrain yourself.”

C: Those are some feudal superstitions (foolish behavior, not backed by science; baidu) LYN: What are you- you’re trying to ruin me, is that it? Are you even my fan? This line of thinking makes you absolutely qualified to be an anti-fan; this ability of yours to take my words and twist them to a higher level of intellect in order to discredit me. I said that if you sneezed once then someone mentioned you, if you sneezed twice then someone is cursing you, and if you sneezed three times then someone is thinking of you. And then someone comes out and says, “Liu Yuning is spreading feudal superstitions during his livestream!” I think this burden might ruin me- what are you doing?? Stop trying me. LYN: I’m sure everyone is living under a lot of pressure nowadays. Be a little more tolerant. Don’t waste your energy. We can all live nicely. Work well. Study well. Live well. Treat people with kindness, because kindness begets kindness. Evil begets evil. Ill-intentions are always met with retribution. Is that also a feudal superstition? Kindness begets kindness and evil begets evil?

--

C: Ning-ge, is the beauty filter on? LYN: Of course it is. I’ll tell you honestly. It’s on. ... But not high. Normally when I stream I’ll turn on the options for blur and brightness. I don’t really turn on the other ones. Look at my eyes- they’re so small. They look especially small today because I don’t have any eye makeup. today I woke up and washed my face, and then came to stream. Okay, I didn’t wash my face- I put on some BB cream, and THEN came to stream.  C: It’s polite to turn on the beauty filter. LYN: Right! It’s the New Year and everyone is coming in to see me stream, so what point is there in showing a very haggard appearance? Freshening up is out of respect to my viewers. If someone on the street walked up to you and it was clear they didn’t shower in days... wouldn’t you feel disrespected? C: Givenchy’s foundation? LYN: Oh, my mistake. I put on some foundation earlier.

C: Ning-ge, you’re trending at #22. LYN: I don’t believe you. ~I don’t believe what you’re saying is real. Woman- don’t trick me. Well, since I’m already trending, then I’ll sing a song and see if I can climb up in the ranks at all. Let’s see if I can use music to make people stay. I’ll sing a song.~ C: Man- this is real. LYN: ~Oh~ Is it truly real? I don’t believe it.~ C: This man’s voice sounds like Siri. LYN: /Siri voice/ I’m here.

LYN: Hey Siri. Siri: Hm? LYN: Oh, I actually activated it. Hey, Siri. Siri: Hm? LYN: Happy New Year. Siri: Happy New Year. I hope in this new year you as as bright and alert as a rabbit. LYN: Thank you. // I just exchanged New Year’s greetings with Siri. LOL.

C: My mom is asking when you’re going to come over and spend the New Year. LYN: Have you tricked your mother and told her that I’m your boyfriend? Is that how it is? Let me tell you, try not to use this lie. Because, once Auntie sees a young kid like me, her expectations will be raised. Then later when you want to bring a REAL boyfriend home, she won’t like them. This lie is likely to influence your future marriage prospects, understand? Don’t do this. Don’t lie to your mother. Your mother will say, “This one isn’t as good as Xiao Ning was.” That’s no good, right? This influences your future. Don’t do this. Be honest. Just tell her I’m your idol. “A super idol’s smile is not as sweet as yours.” Just tell her straight that I’m your idol. C: Ning-ge, on this you’re so manly. So confident. LYN: That’s right, I am the legendary “Pu-Xin Nan”- the “most trustworthy man in all the world.” (普天之下最适合信任的男人) LYN: I am also the legendary “Ma-Bao Nan” (sounds like: Momma’s Boy, 妈宝男) = “Oh my goodness, a treasure boy!” (哎哟妈呀! 宝藏男孩.)

LYN: What song should I sing? I should sing something... // Let me sing this. This is a theme song made for the Palace Museum, sung by Modern Brothers’ Liu Yuning. It’s called “Heritage.” I gift this song to each and every friend who is with me right now. - 传承 (Heritage)

LYN: I was trying to make a joke earlier, and some of you have taken it seriously and are calling me a “momma’s boy”. I said “Ma-Bao Nan” and by that I meant “Oh my goodness, a treasure boy!” But you totally missed the point. Friends, I’m currently trending right now. A lot of people are seeing that I am trending and may just so happen to click into the stream. But if you keep spamming “momma’s boy” in the comments, they’re going to think there’s some sort of story here. You’re going to make me infamous. They’re going to think there’s a story here and they’re going to start digging. What happens if they start liking me? :) Whose fault is that? Initially they liked a different artist, but because they wanted to get to know me in order to dig up some dirt they started liking me instead. How am I supposed to explain this to my friends in this industry? So that’s why we shouldn’t take jokes too far, alright??  C: Whose fault? Liu Yuning’s. LYN: XD C: What is a “pu-xin nan”? LYN: “The most trustworthy man in all the world.” 

C: What about “xia-tou nan”? LYN: “xia-tou nan?” (下头男) [t/n: opposite of addicting “上头”; so... “off-putting”?] That is.. “one of the many other no.1 men in the world.” C: “Xia-Tou-Nan” is the “man who cuts his hair downstairs”. LYN: Do you own a hair salon??? This friend must own a salon- they live on the second floor and the shop is on the first floor downstairs. I’m guessing this fan is a girl, and her husband is a hair dresser who cuts customers’ hair downstairs. She calls her husband a “xia-tou-nan”- the man who cuts hair downstairs. XD C: Cutting your hair in the first month of the year? LYN: What’s wrong with that? Are you not allowed to? You really want to spread feudal superstitions here in LYN’s livestream?!? I’ll leave you with this burden instead. What’s wrong with cutting your hair in the first month? Are you trying to spread superstitions? Please leave. XD

- [t/n: this type of word pun goes on for a couple more examples, but I don’t want to translate bc I don’t understand them and my brain hurts, lol. But basically they are trying to make him give ah... alternate meanings to some common (non-pg) expressions. Chinese semantics.]

C: Ning-ge, how did you know I lived in a villa. - [t/n: got to this topic tangentially from one of the previous examples of word play//explanation.] LYN: Are you trying to show off your wealth? I’ve met two types of people who do this. The first kind are doing it purely as a bluff. The second are the kind of people who may really have a villa at home, but are the type of person who are the target of multiple types of scammers. If you have a villa, I want you to be wary, because I’m sure that there is someone on weibo sending you a private message to click into some link as a ploy to steal your savings. Because they see you have power. Or, it could be someone who changes their name to “Liu Yuning” and will pretend to have a conversation with you under the guise that I am on a secondary account. Because, since you have a villa, it means that your family must have quite a bit of financial prowess. If someone called “Liu Yuning” adds you, and you ask them “Are you Liu Yuning?” and they say, “Yes. This is Ning-ge’s secondary account.” and they start having a conversation with you, don’t rush it. Three months later they’re going to start asking to borrow 200RMB from you. They’ll say, “Ning-ge is having some trouble, can you wire me 200?” At that time just take a moment to think. It doesn’t matter if this Ning-ge is real or fake, they still chatted with you for three months. If you were paying them a salary, I’m sure you would still give the 200RMB. So, just be careful not to get scammed.

--

C: Ning-ge, I’ve run out of guazi. LYN: You’ve watched my streams so much that you ran out of guazi? What, should I go out and but 2kg and send it to your house? I should go out and find guazi for you? Should I add in some peanuts, too?? LYN: You event ell me when you’ve run out of guazi... you’re really... Really treating me like your waiter.

C: Ning-ge, I feel like your neck is a little short. LYN: I’m a cook. Friends, you should know that my neck is short because I’m a mess cook. Big face and thick neck, makes me a cook. It matches up. [t/n: this is some other word play]

LYN: ! ... :O ... >.> ... <.< ... Friends, my neighbors are fighting. It’s the new year, it’s not worth it. Do you hear it? C: I hear it. LYN: I don’t even hear anything. You must be having auditory hallucinations. Get that checked out. But anyway, they’re really fighting. Let me go take a look. Maybe I can get them to stop fighting. This is no good. I’m going to go take a look.Wait for me a sec, don’t go anywhere. If you still haven’t subscribed to my weibo, please subscribe. I’ll play you a video. Wait for me. -- break #2 LYN: Wait for me a little bit longer, I forgot to grab a bottle of water. LYN: !! My computer froze. No way. LYN: Let me grab some water. -- break #2.5

LYN: Alright friends, cheers. Wait, no. This music isn’t right, I need something more elegant. We can cheers. Friends, get some water.  - /plays 祝酒歌 (Toast Song)/ C: Is this elegant? LYN: No. But I’ve had such a big glass of orange juice, can you all have mercy on me? Thanks. C: My dad said this song is from his generation. LYN: What are you saying, bro? We’re of all of the same generation. Next, I’ll sing you something from our generation. Uh... what songs are there from our generation. Um... let me think. C: Searching for You. LYN: A song from our generation is “Searching for You”?? No, it’s not. Er... let me think... This is from our generation. - 上海灘 (Shanghai Bund) LYN: That’s from our generation, right? Hehe. C: Your Cantonese is so good. LYN: Well if you’re going to say that, then I’ll sing another. - 千千阙歌 (Thousands of Songs) LYN: Oh, it’s so high. Let me lower the key an octave and see if I can pull it off. LYN: Now I sound like an old man singing. I can’t do it. - 倩女幽魂  (A Chinese Ghost Story) - /sings the first verse/ LYN: That’s enough. - /lip syncs badly to his own song instead/

C: My Cantonese is as good as yours. LYN: Well, I am from Dongbei... it’s still a bit of a distance to Guangdong.

--

C: Fake singing. Get out! LYN: Didn’t think there would be a day you would catch me lip syncing. Was it really so fake? Because the mic wasn’t even near my mouth? - /sings for real/ LYN: /sigh/ Lip syncing. Actually some people can make it look really real. Usually there are a few different kinds of lip syncing. The first is that you’re just moving your mouth. /demonstrates/ It looks fake, right? It’s actually not like this. There are other ways, one of which is: play the music, mute the mic, and sing for real. I’m still singing my part, but the mic isn’t picking up any audio. That’s one way to make it seem more real. /demonstrates/ C: You can still tell. LYN: Oh no. I can’t trick you anymore, in the future. C: I knew it was fake. LYN: Because you KNEW it was fake. C: Ning-ge, you didn’t mess up the lyrics. You must be lip syncing. LYN: If I didn’t sing it wrong then I must be faking. That’s true. There’s nothing wrong with that logic. LYN: No- it’s because the audio and video don’t quite match up, right now. Watch me speaking. It doesn’t quite match up with my lip movement because there’s a bit of a delay in the stream. All online streams have a bit of delay. It’s because mine is too HQ. My stream setting is high, so it takes bit longer to transmit. This is normal. 

--

LYN: Alright, I’m here to chat and sing a little. What time did I come today? Let me see how long I’ve been streaming for. 2 hours and 55 minutes. LYN: I saw they released statistics of my streaming for last year. I found out that ever since I started in the YNGS crew, there’s a big gap. My streaming time got short. I wasn’t quite awake enough. But it’s okay. It’s still early. It’s 9:44p. Be honest, guys, are you sleepy? If you’re sleepy then I’ll leave. Are you sleepy? It’s the second day of the new year! I want to wish you a happy new year. I hope you are all healthy and everything goes as you wish. It’s rare that you are able to take this time and spend it with your family. I’m going to enjoy this period of time as well, and then it’s back to the grind. C: What are you saying? I’m not sleepy. / High school late classes haven’t even let out yet. LYN: ?_? Are you serious. School is that hardcore now? You’re at school on the second day of the new year and late classes aren’t even over yet? Are you for real? Or are you talking on a normal day. You can’t mean right now, right?? LYN: Why don’t I believe you? I mean- it’s not that I don’t believe you, but... Oh! I see high school USUALLY lets out at 10p, but not today- the second day of the new year-, right? Normally- okay, I can understand. I was thinking you were going to be at school this late even today- that’s TOO miserable. It’s good that’s not the case. C: School starts on the 6th day of the new year. LYN: Students are under a lot of pressure, too. It’s like you’re going to work already. You are all the future of society. And, I always say this, because I didn’t go to college and I’m not that educated- but when you really enter into society and start working then you’re really going to cherish the time you spent in school. You’re going to cherish that forever. You may be thinking that it’s difficult to keep going, but once you get over it and you really start working then you’re going to miss the days you were in school. Cherish the time you have now, friends.

C: Ning-ge, you’re 30+ and haven’t had a break, no one is working as hard as you. LYN: I still take a break. But I’m working today. Originally, the crew had planned to start filming on the third day of the new year. But a few days before the new year they told us that we would start at the end of the month instead. In that case I have a few days to rest. It’s the 23rd today, so I still have two days.

C: I just noticed you’re wearing short sleeves. LYN: I have an air conditioner. I’m not cold. You don’t have to worry about me.

LYN: Some of you want to see my foot. My foot’s alright. It will still take a month and a half to heal. Thanks for worrying about me. I’m okay. And anyway, men fight, right? (爷们要战斗) I can do it. It’s just another month or so.

--

- /grabs Daimi/ LYN: A lot of you want to see Daimi. She hasn’t had a bath in a few days, so she looks a little messy. I didn’t want to let her on camera because she looks a little worse for wear. I wanted to preserve her artists image. Well, anyway. LYN: /to Daimi/ Greet everyone for the New Year.  - /delivering Daimi’s greetings/

LYN: Here, why don’t you sing? /tries some “ventriloquism”/ You sing so well! /continues/

C: Daimi only has eyes for you. LYN: Not so. You all just like to make everything sound so wonderful. Today, I’m going to have to burst that bubble. You like to make a lot of things so nice, but really my dog looks down on me. Of course I have a lot of people in my group and among them she is the closest to me- to her, I’m a one of a kind existence. But I used to have a rule. I used to have a dog, before- Youmi. This is Daimi. I wouldn’t let my dogs sleep on the bed. They can be in the house, but not on the bed. I used to think that a grown man petting a cat and hugging his dog wasn’t... I don’t know- wasn’t doing anything proper? Since I grew up with my grandparents- it’s an old way of thinking that I grew up with. So I didn’t hold or let my dogs sleep on the bed.. but not this one. I must be under her spell.  LYN: She’s pretty foolish; her IQ’s a little low but her EQ is high. Sometimes I grab her onto the bed, and then sleep with her. But not in the blankets- I’m in the blankets and I put her on top and pet her as I go to sleep. She has something against me. The longest shell stay is an hour, before she leaves. It used to be that I didn’t let my dogs on the bed. Now I have a dog that doesn’t WANT to be on the bed. She goes to her room; it must be more comfortable for her there than on my bed.

LYN: You can tell with one look into her eyes that she doesn’t have a high IQ. I’m not trying to diss her or make fun of her or anything. She’s just really cute. She doesn’t have those bad habits- like other dogs will chew on your shoes or rip things apart and break things- she doesn’t. If you GIVE her a shoe to chew on she doesn’t like it. She won’t chew on electrical wires, either. She’s just a really foolish puppy and doesn’t have any bad habits. LYN: But she does have one lately- and it’s that she likes to bark. She’s a little older than two now, and for the first year and a half I thought she was mute. She had never barked before. At most she would growl, but not bark. But in the recent year and a half she must have drifted. After she realized she was an artist she got spoiled. She barks every day. She barks at whoever’s at the door. Sometimes when I’m on set the director or other actors will come to see me- she barks at them. She used to be good, which is why I said her EQ is high. When I am filming sometimes a drama, company, or platform director will stop by and monitor. They’ll stop by and have a rest in my RV. She used to know her manners. If four people got on the car, she would greet whoever was the leader. For example, if four people got on the car and one of them was a woman from the company’s platform, very amazing... She’ll climb right into her lap! She’ll hug her leg and pretend to be cute. Normally they all like dogs so they indulge her. She’s such a good puppy. She’s helping me make connections! I’m guessing some of the jobs I even got were BECAUSE they liked her. She’ll greet all four but in the end she will go found the leader. C: She in estrus? LYN: But my dog is female, what would she be going around hugging people’s legs for?? LYN: Anyway, she’s not the same now. She barks at whoever comes. She doesn’t care about the platform or producers anymore. It’s gone to her head. XD Artists, man. I see in the past year and a half she’s becoming famous in her own right. She even has her own SuperTopic. So her attitude is changing. But the good thing is that she only barks and never tries to bite anyone. Sometimes she goes wild with barking and I think, “It’d be nice if you actually bit...”. Sometimes the person who comes will know her already, so they pick her up while she’s barking... and she continues to bark in their arms. Who is she barking at?? Maybe she’s barking at the outside? - /Daimi barks/ C: She heard you talking smack about her. LYN: I’ve ruined her reputation. Her market value is dropping. - /looks at Daimi on the floor... points at her./ LYN: What are you looking at??

LYN: She doesn’t even care when I call her name. So I call her something different. My dog has two names now. The first is “Daimi”. The second is “Want a sausage?” If I look at her and say “Want a sausage?” she’s so happy she doesn’t know what to do with herself.

--

C: Are you still going to stream next month? LYN: You’re already onto next month? I was planning to stream again this month.. You already want plans for next month??  LYN: If I’m not that busy with filming for this drama, I’ll go back to streaming how I did before. I used to so at least two-three streams a month, at the least. If I’m not too busy... but I will be busy at the start! Because I’m just entering the crew and need to get used to the character and read the script and things like that. I should be less busy later, though, When I’ve acclimated. It should be no problem.

C: Wasn’t filming going to start at the end of the month? LYN: Yeah, but I’ve got to make preparations before that. We have to do a script reading, set costuming and hair and makeup. There are lots of things to do. Just hair/makeup- I think last time for YNGS it took two days. I was trying on clothes for three. But I think that the look for YNGS- in my personal opinion- is the coolest I’ve looked of the drama’s I’ve shot in the past couple years. I think I look a bit more handsome in this than the others, because I’ve already told the producers to add some beauty filters for me. “I’m begging you. I’ll do really good in for my voice-acting, so please add in some post-editing for me.” C: Ning-ge, that’s not professional. LYN: No, you don’t get it. It’s because every drama edits in post-production anyway. If you think about my past dramas you’ll find that in any scene I am in the same frame as an actress I have a beauty filter. But when I’m in the same frame as an actor then it’s lacking. You can ponder on the reasoning for that yourselves. Isn’t it? Whenever I was in the same frame as an actor there was pretty much no filter, so I looked so terrible that it was hard to keep watching. But when I’m in the same frame as an actress there’s a filter. This time around I asked the production jiejie if she could add the filter whether I’m with a man or a woman. It doesn’t matter if I’m with an old guy or a great auntie, please add the filter for us all.  C: It looks more textured/realistic without it. LYN: You’re not wrong. ...But you must be an outsider. Where do you think “texture” comes from? Do you think it comes from not adding a beauty filter? As long as there’s no filter, there’s texture? Then, if I record something with my phone does it have texture or not? Having a filter and having texture have nothing to do with each other. Where does texture come from? One of you said it right. It comes from the Thermage. If your face looks good then anything looks textured. 

LYN: I didn’t know this before, but I recently realized that whether you look good or not is very important, for an actor. It’s not extremely important, but for a young actor I think it tends to be more important than most. I say this because... sometimes a person won’t need to do anything and they’re successful, because their face already captured my attention. That’s why I feel like it’s important to have good looks.  C: You’re good looking, too! LYN: I’m just average. In terms of appearance I’m really just average.

C: I went out to play for a bit and came back, but you’re still streaming. LYN: See? This is what it’s like to like LYN. It doesn’t matter if you go out and play, when you turn back I will be here waiting. Even if you go and move on to liking someone else- you can go out and play around- when you come back, I’ll still be here. How romantic is that?

C: Have you determined any variety shows for this year yet? LYN: No, I haven’t made a decision on any of them. Do you think this industry OWES me??? You think I have resources backing me?? Who do you think is pulling the strings in order to get me drama roles AND variety show appearances? Honestly, there are a lot of companies who want to make variety shows, but whether those shows can become come to fruition depends on whether or not they can find sponsors. If they can’t find sponsors, then they can’t make the show. If we had someone just throwing money at shows, we could definitely make them happen, but... now we’re just waiting for those money throwing bosses to show up in the first place.

C: Are you still streaming this month? LYN: Didn’t I just- I don’t know whether I’ll stream again this month or not. We’ll see. I’ll start to be busy again in a couple days. If I’m not too tired I’ll come to stream. It’s not like my stream is some big event that I have to prepare for. I just have to grab my computer and start a stream. At the most it will only cause me to waste a little foundation. XD It’s just that simple. It’s not as if I have any staff support- I don’t. There’s no one else here with me. My staff work well with me- when I’m streaming they’re either outside or not here at all. If there’s someone in the house with me, I can’t stream. I’ll be thinking of too many things. Streaming is easy for me. If I feel like it, I just get on my computer and start. It’ll only cost me in electricity. All it needs is one person and one dog, and we’re ready to go. C: Are you shy? LYN: It’s not that I’m shy, I just want a space where I am alone to stream. I’m just more relaxed that way.

C: Has Modern Brothers Liu Yuning Studio had a change in personnel lately? LYN: I’ve seen that too. They say I’ve changed staff, so they think I’m doing well for myself. Another thing they say is that the boss (himself) must have given year-end bonuses. Because I’ve done some photo shoots. It’s not that. I didn’t used to post any photos like this because I just don’t like taking them. I really don’t. They always tell me, “Boss, let’s take some photos” and I always tell them no. I find it bothersome. LYN: The new year, for example- I went to Jiangsu and sang three songs. 魔法药水 (You are my Magic), 笑红尘 (Laughing at the Mundane World), and 寻一个你 (Searching for You). I sang them all live. I know I’m a singer but singing three songs live had me panicking too! If I sang one wrong lyrics it would be live broadcast for everyone to see. Singing live is fine, but singing for a live broadcast makes me nervous too. If I sang badly just once it would just be out there, with no way to stop it. So all through that night I was really nervous. I was already nervous in the dressing room- my hands were ice cold and I was shaking. It’s not as serious as it sounds, but in any case I was a mess. This event only happen once a year, I didn’t want to embarrass myself on New Year’s, of all days. If I embarrass myself on the New Year it’s like embarrassing myself for two year’s worth of time. (the year going and the year coming). LYN: So I was nervous, and my staff were asking if they could shoot some photos. Previously, I would have said, “Let’s not take any photos. You’re making me more nervous than I need to be. I’m already THIS close to wetting myself, and you want to take photos?? Don’t bother me!” This includes other events, too- artists always take pre-carpet photos, right? I didn’t use to like those. First of all, it costs money and secondly, in order to take those photos I would need to get up an hour and half earlier than I would need to. Why would I take photos when I could use that time to lie down for a while- take a nap or watch a movie? For should I wake early to get into hair and makeup, and then to take pictures?? Taking photos is the thing I dislike the most. Why do you think my studio doesn’t have photos? It’s because I don’t want to take any. Some of you fans actually curse at my studio because of that. My staff are wronged for no reason. I’ve said this before as well- it’s just that /I/ don’t like taking the pictures. LYN: But this year I’ve had a bit of an epiphany. It’s just because I don’t have much to do this year. Rather, I haven’t shown my face outside ever since I entered into the YNGS crew. A lot of galas and events invited me, but I didn’t go. The truth is I’m afraid that my fans have seen too little of me. That’s why for these end of the year events I’ve tried to take pictures while I could. I’m thinking one year (since the last photo shoot) has been long enough. LYN: You may get the feeling that my studio has changed staff because it’s been too long since we posted photos. This time we went a little hard with it. It’s like starving you for half a month. I guarantee you’ll be happy with whatever I put in front of you. You’ll be full and satisfied.

LYN: Also, at Jiangsu I sang You are My Magic, right? Did you hear what other song we put in there? I sang a bit of 帶我去找夜生活 (Night Life. Take us to the Light). Did you watch it? I was watching the playback, and there was a comment saying, “Jiangsu is too unprofessional. This song is clearly You Are My Magic AND Night Life, but they only wrote the title of one. How unprofessional.” I was thinking, “Friend, you’re too naive.” If I had tacked the second song title on there, the performance might not have been able to air. You want Jiangsu Satellite TV to tell you that they are broadcasting a song called “Take me to find the Night Life”?? You have to take that into consideration, child. There are problems with that. LYN: Also, originally I was only planning on singing Magic, but after I heard it, I felt like it would fall a little flat because the second half of the song pretty much repeats the same verse. I asked them if we could add a song into the middle. They asked me which song, so I suggested another one of the band’s songs. Just stick it in there and be done with it. Jiangsu didn’t blink and eye, and spent a lot of money to buy the copyrights to just four lines of the additional song. And you still think they’re unprofessional?? Jiangsu is so good to me, really. They have never held back when it came to musical performances. C: Which four lines? - /doesn’t fall for the bait/

C: What about the camera shots? LYN: Now we’re on a different topic- I really don’t want to talk about this one. Let’s not. - [t/n: Fans of Liu Yuning and Zhang Yifan were fighting because LYN was singing Searching for You, his song, but the camera mostly focused on ZYF, who was featured as a dancer. LYN had to make a statement telling fans to delete their malicious comments about ZYF, and ZYF also stepped up to tell her fans not to fight with LYN’s.]

C: Which four lines? LYN: Just those four, you know. How does it go? - /plays the lines: If you have not yet slept; If I have not stopped chasing. If being sober is a crime, then I’ll take my oath and exchange it for a promise not to return./ - /prepares to sing it, suddenly stops/ LYN: Feels like I’m missing something if I don’t have my guitar. Let me get it. Everybody get hyped! -- 帶我去找夜生活 (Night Life. Take us to the Light)

C: Ning-ge, can you sing one of Wang Sulong’s songs? LYN: WSL’s copyrights are too intense. You can’t find accompaniments for his tracks anywhere online. I really would like to sing one, but there are no accompaniments so I can’t really sing them. There’s nothing I can do.

C: Any fun stories from the New Year’s galas? LYN: No? It was normal. Other than the fact that I was pretty nervous. The other thing I was nervous about was if I attended the event and then later got sick. Everything else was pretty normal.

C: Were you happy to sit next to Mao Buyi? LYN: Are you MBY’s fan?? You must be. That is- how happy would two friends be to sit together? That’s how happy we were. I’d just like to ask, how happy did you expect me to be? That’s normal too. Did I have to be happier because I’d seen a celebrity? LYN: It was pretty mystical too, though. He just happened to be wearing a long white coat. It was a windbreaker, but it just so happened to be white. From the back he really did look a lot like a doctor or nurse. He used to be a nurse, I think. Then my leg happens to be crippled. We went up on stage together- he with his white coat and me with my broken foot- and it looked like a doctor helping his patient. That was so strange, and purely coincidence. We didn’t discuss our outfits beforehand at all. Also, I didn’t know that we would be getting our awards together.

C: The sound is too loud. LYN: Which sound? Do you mean the music? Are you using headphones or are you just playing from your phone speakers? If you’re using speakers you might think it’s a little loud because of the noise. Wearing headphones is better. Here in my stream- look at those flashing lights back there. If I just had these in my house normally, would you think I were insane? I installed these lights to bring up the mood of my stream. The music and lights is to create the sense of atmosphere. The sound of the music is to give you the feeling like you are at a bar. Not only does it close the distance between us, it also serves to surround you with the mood. C: Ning-ge is this your study (book room)? LYN: I don’t read books. There is no “study” to speak of. This is a computer room. As a “pu-xin-nan” our houses don’t have book rooms. There are only computer rooms. 

C: Can minors watch Ning-ge’s stream? LYN: Yeah, just turn on your child-monitoring. You should be asking this question to your parents. I advise, if you are a minor, that you should have parental supervision while watching. Still, have a guardian watch you while you are watching my stream. First of all, though, I have my gifting options closed so you don’t have to worry about your child accidentally spending money here. Secondly, I don’t sell anything, so there are no ways that I can take advantage of you. My stream is here purely as a material benefit to you all. So when you turn on child-monitoring, if I happen to say something that happens to be sensitive, it will automatically censor me. For example, earlier I said that I sang a song called “Night Life. Take us to the Light” at Jiangsu TV- with the monitoring, minors can’t hear those words at all. Just turn the function on and you’ll be fine.

C: My mom doesn’t let me chase stars, so she doesn’t want me to watch at all. LYN: Then, then what can you do? If your mom doesn’t want you to chase stars, then don’t. Have you ever heard the song, “Listen to your mother. Don’t let her get hurt.”? ( 聽媽媽的話 | Listen to Mother’s Words) “I want to grow up quickly, so I can protect her.” If your mom doesn’t want you to chase stars then don’t, I guess. Don’t make it seem like we’re meeting up secretly behind her back. She doesn’t want you to chase stars, and yet here you are. That makes it seem like our relationship between idol and fan can’t be seen by the public.

C: My mom said you’re noisy. LYN: /sigh/ Yeah? What did you want me to turn on my stream and we would pray together (in silence)? Do you want to have a staring contest? Here, let me play some soothing music for you. LYN: ~Alright. Follow me as we breathe in deeply. Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Until the end.~ LYN: You’d be sleepy in no time!

LYN: Oh, I almost forgot. Are you watching Choice Husband (择君记 | Ze Jun Ji) at all, friends? There’s a song in there... that I sang. I heard that this drama is pretty good, and it’s one of my good friend- Zhang Xueying- ‘s works. The first drama I shot, Hot Blooded Youth, I worked with her. I was just a little idiot at the time. She had already debuted and become a prominent actress way before that. She was a child actress. She was the first female actress I worked with and working with her was great. She took good care of me, being a rookie actor as I was. Even though I was old in age. But in front of her I was just a rookie actor, so she looked out for me. Anyway, this is her drama called Choice Husband and I have a song in it called 愿重逢 (Wish to Reunite). You can go listen- I mean, go watch it. -  愿重逢 (Wish to Reunite), Choice Husband OST C: You sang so well I feel emotional. LYN: Aiyo, that’s unlikely.

C: Heroes, Choice Husband, A New Life Begins, and A Dream of Splendor. LYN: I sang for them all, right? Thanks. You must not be my fan. LYN: /mocking himself/ “LYN, just stick to singing. Stop acting.” LYN: I should still act. I still have to act... C: Your acting-fans don’t accept (that you stop acting). LYN: I’ll act. I still have to. I’ve got some OSTs down for the next year, and if I have time I’ll still accept more drama roles. C: Singers should stick to singing. Stop acting. LYN: A lot of actors are starting to sing now too, though. Right? Be more tolerant. It’s the same. Whether you’re an actor or a singer, I think ability is a large part of it. Only when you have the ability to do something, should you do it. Not just tacking on useless titles.

C: It’s been so long since I watched one of your streams. LYN: Because I haven’t streamed in a long time. But it’s the new year now and I have some time to come stream. Mostly because I’m afraid you would miss me too much.

C: Ning-ge, you’re trending at #2. LYN: Stop saying nonsense. There’s no way I could be at #2. You must be subscribed to me, so you accidentally clicked on “my topics” and not “recommended”. I’ll believe you if you said I’m second among those you have subscribed to. Don’t mess around. You can’t even work weibo? LYN: I was trending earlier, but not now. There are so many people in the world, there’s no way I could be up there for so long. LYN (anti): LYN, I’m telling you, you should be happy that you are even qualified to be trending in the first place. Don’t be picky. It’s good enough that you were up there. Don’t get full of yourself. LYN: Thank you to everyone watching. You gave me a trending topic today. So if you haven’t subscribed to my weibo yet, please do so.

C: My mom wants me to go to bed at 11p. LYN: Why do you keep telling me what your mom wants? Do you think I can save you?? Earlier someone told me that their mother didn’t want them to chase stars. What could I say?? I told her not to chase stars. Now you’re telling me your mom wants you to sleep at 11p- do you think I can tell you NOT to go to sleep? If she wants you to sleep at 11p, then go sleep. If you’re sleepy, go to sleep. There’s still the playback. Just watch this tomorrow. There’s that song, right? Listen to Mother’s Words, don’t let her get hurt. You want to quickly grow up so that you can protect her. /continues reciting the lyrics/

C: My mom told me not to play with the opposite gender. LYN: Well, by that logic- I’m not playing with you. Who’s playing with you? Secondly, she probably means in real life? But it depends on what you’re playing. Normally, if you’re playing a game in school it should be fine. You mom probably just doesn’t want anyone bullying you. This is not an all-encompassing statement, though. You’ve got to find a husband eventually, right? She’s going to make you not like boys...

C: Is Chong Zhi going to air soon? LYN: Don’t ask me when a drama will be airing. I really don’t know. Honestly, I can ASK but there’s no real NEED to. Are you’re making me out to be a gossip blog and I should tell you whenever a drama is about to air? I remember I saw one that said ALZ would air in October of last year. Because the interest in ALZ is pretty high, right? So last year I saw a blog saying that they predict ALZ would air in October. I saw that and I wanted to punch them in the mouth. I wanted to say, “I haven’t even done my voice acting yet. X’D You say it’s going to air in October, you must be crazy!” They had just sent me the OST, and you’re telling me it’ll air in October?? LYN: It’s true that I recorded the OST fairly early. But I hadn’t done any of my voice acting yet. The gossip blogs aren’t accurate. For a lot of dramas whether it will air or not... /doesn’t continue/ C: When’s ALZ airing? LYN: I don’t know. It should be soon. 

LYN: The other day I was having dinner with my next director and they said to me, “Yesterday I saw some gossip online that said you have a drama with Jing Tian? It’s said to start in March? I took one look at our contract and said, “That’s fake news.”” Because in March I’ll be with HIS drama crew. LYN: I think of it like this- the fact that gossip blogs even deign to mention me means that they look highly upon me. Right? Let’s look at this from an objective standpoint. I’m not thinking of myself as an artist who’s all that- honestly speaking, I’m doing well for myself. The fact that gossip blogs are willing to mention my name mean that they look well upon me. By this, I mean in two aspects: 1) they think I’m good enough to participate in such an amazing project, or 2) they’re just mentioning me so that people can come curse at me, and that way their account will see traffic. That’s a second kind of recognition, but it’s recognition all the same.  LYN: That’s why I’m a “pu-xin-nan”- “the man most easily trusting of other people in all the world” (普天之下最容易相信别人的男人) C: They’re trying to ride off your tears. LYN: If think you were trying to type “fame” (liulang) but typed “tears” (liulei) instead. Also, I don’t have any fame

C: What’s your next drama? LYN: Don’t rush. You’ll know in the next couple of days. Then when the time comes, all you have to do is watch. C: Is it modern or historical? LYN: Guzhuang. C: The script is in for a big change. LYN: Why does the script have to change? Because my foot’s broken? No- it’s long been settled. They’re not going to change the script just for me. I’m not worthy of doing so. I can still shoot everything. I was still shooting for YNGS, even! For more than a month. It’s all the same. Even if you’re disabled you can still shoot dramas, still do fight scenes, still ride horses. It’s just that the horse can’t be running. For YNGS I had a few later shots that had to be done with the horse. I can get up onto it but since my foot has this on it- /shows his foot in its boot again/- this boot- we covered it a little with the clothes- but the problem is that I can’t put this foot into the stirrup. My left foot can go into it, but my right foot is just hanging. I can still ride slowly, but not gallop because for that you need both legs giving strength so you can control the horse. But anyway, I can still film all the same. I can still do the fight scenes, still do the wire-work. It’s not problem. I can still shoot the drama.

//

C: Does Daimi get any red envelopes? LYN: Daimi? No. But I gave her a lot of tasty things to eat. Yesterday I had dumplings and gave her two. It counts as having celebrated the new year. We had dumplings on the new year, too. Last night I felt a little hungry so I cooked more dumplings, and gave some to her. She doesn’t get red envelopes. She won’t know how to spend the money anyway. Little kids don’t know how to spend money. C: Can dogs EAT dumplings? LYN: In moderation. You just can’t feed it to them all the time. C: She’s not a “little kid” she’s a “little dog”.  LYN: Same difference. She’s still small. It’s just an expression, oh my goodness...

C: Are you male lead or second lead? LYN: Technically speaking I’m third male lead. I’m playing the male lead’s brother. I come out on screen... and then I immediately die in battle. That’s my situation... and then I can wrap up! But, this scene is so complex that I need four months to prepare for it. I have to work out how this character should die: every breath, every drop of blood, and how I should die. What words should I say before my death? All of those require months of preparation. C: He’s not taken away by aliens? LYN: Here’s the thing- I play the male lead’s brother and die on the battlefield in the first episode. After I die, I come back in the last episode on a UFO. Actually I’m not dead, I was just taken by aliens. I participated in an intergalactic war and after two battles I was brought back. I return in glory. C: What’s the book called? LYN: The book is called... “Fun Tales of an Alien and I”. Does this book have fans? LYN: “The Days I was Abducted by Aliens” is also a good name. This book has two names. It’s a good book. Look it up immediately, it’s the drama I’ll be shooting next.

C: Ning-ge, is that a Hogwarts pin? LYN: No, it’s Donald Duck. It says, “Get rich” *(发财). LYN: I hope that this year the group of friends watching my stream right now can all “get rich”.

LYN: I’ve been thinking of watching a movie lately. A lot of my friends said they went to watch a movie during the new year. I kind of want to watch The Wandering Earth II. Maybe when I have some time in the next couple days.

LYN: It’s about time, friends. Someone earlier said their mom wanted them to sleep at 11p. I guess they already went to sleep, then. It’s about time for me, too. I have’t eaten yet and so I need to make something to eat later.

C: Eating late night snacks isn’t healthy. LYN: Let’s discuss this topic of “late eating”. This friend says that eating late at night isn’t healthy, but there’s also a saying that goes “A man is not rich without external wealth, and a horse is not fat without night grass. (人无外财不富，马无夜草不肥) So from a certain aspect man and a horse are the same. Why are some people prone to being fat? Because they eat late night snacks. But if you say it’s not good (healthy)... I don’t agree. It depends on circumstance. For example, if you’re going to get abducted by aliens for it, that’s bad. But to me, as someone who lives on the Earth, who just woke up this afternoon, a “late night snack” is actually my “breakfast”. It’s my first meal, so it’s “breakfast”. Are you going to tell me that breakfast is bad for you?? This is reasonable, right? So we can’t say that late night snacks in and of themselves are bad, rather the TIME that you eat them determines whether they are good or bad. If I woke up this afternoon and still haven’t eaten, but you tell me that late night snacks are bad so I skip the meal and go straight back to sleep... I’d have gone a whole day without eating. Tell me, is not eating all day good for you or is eating late snacks good for you? LYN: If it were any other topic I wouldn’t chat with you about it. But since you brought up the topic of food I HAVE to chat about it, as a cook myself. I have officially learned for two years and worked for two years as a cook. So once you start talking food with me, I get excited because it has to do with my profession. If you were to try to talk to me about aliens I won’t try to carry the conversation. But as soon as you talk about eating and food I have to put a word in, because it’s my job. Also, us cooks have a course on Nutrition and Wellness. We have a book- though I didn’t read it- but I have it. But maybe because I have this book, I would know more about this topic than most. So I want to talk to you about it. I won’t argue about any other topic.

LYN: I’m thankful for everyone who is still here and who have watched my stream. If you still haven’t subscribed to my weibo please do so. You can come watch me the next time I stream. If you have time, of course. If you’ve got something going on, continue with your business. You can still subscribe, though. It’s not shameful. It’s not shameful to subscribe to Modern Brothers Liu Yuning’s weibo.  LYN: Thank you to everyone who kept me company tonight, even if you came and spent only a little bit of time. I’m grateful for your company. Let’s meet the next time there’s an opportunity, alright? I wish everyone a happy, relaxing, and wonderful night. It was great to have you and I’m happy you came. Let’s meet the next time. Good night, everyone~

[daybr43ks-lam8]

[Audio entry 001 - Give a sincere apology to the discarded masks, for their absence leaves a heavy toll]

[THE FOLLOWING IS TRANSCRIBED FROM THE ONLY AUDIO RECORDING DAYBREAK HAS RECORDED. THE TAPE WAS FILMED SPORADICALLY OVER THE COURSE OF THE DAY, DIVIDERS REPRESENT CUTS IN THE AUDIO FILE, EITHER FROM CORRUPTION OR TAMPERING.] 

[ D@BRR333#$%3AAAA&^*&7382K %UNM00R33 BECOMES INCREASINGLY MORE STRESSED AS THE AUDIO PLAYS ON]

No better than to just.. Talk right? Just speak whatever? As my real self?

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I can’t find myself alone, I’m just in desperate need of someone else. Someone to give me the happiness I want and th. the love I don’t deserve. The loneliness I feel with myself, the thoughts when I’m with.. Myself. I ssSsee things… With.. Myself. I don’t like.. Me when I keep driving people away. They disgust me, they hate me. I’m not good for them, and I’m not good for myself when I stress.. Because then I’m not.. Good for anyone. I hurt the ones I wish to keep. So, I found a solution. 

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I keep… These masks hurt when I let myself breath.. Let.. Myself think. I’ve had to think more than usual. And and I’ve been stressed more than usual. I don’t want to admit why I.. Went after the kid. But, I’ve regretted ever saying anything. And, the more and more people come after me and hear, the more and more I stress out and I go after him… Because I don’t want to hu-.. 

…

To.. Face myself so I just.. Hurt the ones they love. I. I can’t tell you what happened with Cesar though, I think I got too… I’m just.. Making excuses I.. I shouldn’t be allowed to keep them. I knew I didn’t deserve him, nor Jonah.. Nor Dave or Thatcher… Any of them. They’d have been better off without my masquerade, I thought I crafted them with perfection but.. I just crafted them with tears instead. I can’t keep a mask, they burn my skin if I mess up, and I’m back to square one. Artemis… He ran away, a coward, I had nowhere to go. Hawthorne they.. He messed up so much with them. I didn’t know what would happen if I… Let them go around and tell. I didn’t want to be tracked back into Mandela.. No, I wanted to start again. I hoped if I had no husks of my old life other than a few tapes maybe.. Maybe it’d work out. 

I feel bad, for the ones I fooled. But if I got what I wanted and didn’t feel so pitiful like I always do, and be numb to it all.. Maybe everyone could’ve gotten what they wanted. Cesar, his loving.. Older brother. Jonah, someone to help him along… Dave would still.. Be friends with me if I wasn’t like this. Yet I feel terrible when I let myself soak and contemplate alone, whether I should’ve lied at all… Whether I should’ve even come.. Maybe I was meant to be left.. Bleeding out in the snow…. I ask myself so many things with no answers..

And- sometimes.. I ask myself if there was anyone ever truly there. If I knocked on my door, would anyone be home? Nothing I’ve ever done, nobody I’ve ever been has been really there. Really real. I’ve been living an imagination my whole life. Their- their beloved friend is just.. Nothing. I lied to them all, everything I said being numb, to them it’s all real. They all believed me. If I, if I ever told them the truth they’d say I was lying to them, they only got to- to know me at my worst, when, when everything crashed down on me and, I lost it. They’ll only see me as the monster I am I can only play it all off, li. like I alw.ways have.. JussssSst a mon.. monster. I can’t. I can’t tell them. I.. Fucked up I-

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If I could, restart all this, become.. Someone else, someone who isn’t me, someone who is as as beautiful an.d and loveable as they are. IF I COULD TRULY DESERVE THE MERCY THEY BEAR, IF I COULD LIVE AND BE ABLETO BREATH LI LIKE I NORMAL PERSON. JJUST PLEASE LET ME WORTHY FOR ONCE, LETME BE WORTHY. I WANT TO FEEL LIKE SOMEONE ELSE, I DON’T WANT TT TO LIE ANYORE I’M SSssSSSSICK OF IT, I’M HURTING THEM EVEN MORE. MAKE ME FORGET MY NAME, MAKE ME FORGET THE LIFE I NEVER HAAD I’M SICK OF IT.  PLEASE SOMEONE HEAR ME, I’M JUST I’M JUST A SHAM THAT’S ALL I’LL EVER BE, THAT’S ALL SUNMORE EVER WAS- 

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Just….

Please.. Forgive me for all the dam.age I’v..e done… Even,, even if it’s fake.. I can’t.. Bear the sight… Of my own… Face. I know you don’t either. … Apologize to.. Those wh… who endur..ed wi..th my shit.. They deserv..ed better… 

[END TRANSCRIPT]