#laughing at chance tbh
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speakofthedebbie · 2 months ago
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i got my first "Please update" comment yippee /silly
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mattodore · 11 days ago
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i downloaded the twitter font for this
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gallifreyanhotfive · 8 months ago
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spoilerposting is fucking cringe. watch the episode live, don't support the move to streaming.
Oh sweetheart I'd be tagging my spoilers and talking about the new content (or whatever the hell "spoilerposting" means lmao) even if it hadn't moved to streaming because 1) people like to talk about the new episodes and 2) I want to give people who have not watched it the opportunity to block the spoilers tags. Don't be such a killjoy, darling!
But also thank you for the funniest fucking ask I've gotten all day! Honey, I live for being cringe!!! Imagine how dull life would be if you were always worried about what was or was not "cringe." Huh. Couldn't be me lmao
For now though,
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essektheylyss · 2 years ago
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I know it's usually said that Jester's only influences growing up were Marion and Artagan, but I think we are underestimating that she was also in close proximity to Carlos (high class establishment bartender, deeply charismatic if not also incredibly hot) and Bluud (beefy minotaur bodyguard).
Like, not that either of them seem to have offered anything in the way of parental influence, to be clear, but it's no wonder she ended up with the hottest man in Exandria. Her standards were sky-fucking-high.
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illegiblewords · 2 months ago
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Inquisitor Mahanon Lavellan + Warden Alim Surana
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iruludavare · 11 months ago
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↗ The face of a pokemon who will stall your team into oblivion if she and/or Serena chooses to be that petty.
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byanyan · 2 years ago
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ㅤwhen someone's dumb enough to trust you to teach them words and phrases in another language and the whole time you're feeding them the rudest, nastiest things as being pleasant, friendly ways to address people.
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gaywarenn · 8 months ago
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.
#so. there’s this girl. we’re taking the same 20hr a week summer class#so for five hours a day we are in close proximity. i saw her on the first day and thought she was cute. we got to talking#became friends. i organized a study group with us and a few other ppl from class but no one else showed… thank god tbh#what was meant to be a three hour study sesh became 12 hours of us talking about everything and nothing. hinting at being gay. more hinting#about being gay. hour ten: i tell her i’m into women. her smile. god. she laughs and says she’s also into women. red cheeks#nervous glances. she’s been kicking my feet all night just because she could. i’m smiling like an idiot because there’s a chance. she keeps#causally initiating contact. it’s getting to hour twelve. i’ve got to go because i have work in the morning. i can’t keep my eyes off her#‘when are we doing this again?’ ‘tuesday’ ‘deal’#i say goodbye followed with a casual ‘see you in less than 24hrs’ she replies even more casually ‘feels like an eternity’#so basically i’m feeling AO NORMAL HAHAHAHA!!! SHES INTO WOMEN.#SHE SAID I WAS INTIMIDATING WHEN WE FIRST MET. FEW HOURS LATER: INTIMIDATING WOMEN ARE ATTRACTIVE. AAAAHAHAAHAHA!!!! I CANT EVEN#basically i’m in LOVE. we’re planning her birthday party already and that shit is months away- just the two of us.WHAT THE FUCK IS MY LIFE?#I’m so happy and the one tumblr user that follows me has to know.#the way we’ve been texting for an hour after we’ve left. i’m positively gleeful
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bisexualbeckett · 1 year ago
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I wanna be in love but like, no dating only love.
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troublcmakcrs · 1 year ago
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//mr & mrs tweak are my favorite sicko4sicko ship
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wigglesforsquiggles · 1 year ago
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Trying to think of any chants in sports for england but I... am just not interested enough in sports to know any so like uhh
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Trying to think If we have any jokes about england/uk but I can't think of any. In an attempt to google it, I have found a shit ton of english jokes tho about the war and germany aksvskhdjf
is it really that common to make jokes about it in the uk? :'D
as someone who is only vaguely acquainted with football (i was a fan of other sports growing up) i also do not know many, and any i do know it is vaguely most of the time lmao
england as a previously good-at-football nation (debatably) with intense rivalry with other european nations love making jokes and chants abr germany losing both world wars.
to my memory, i remember my dad and brother bringing up jokes abt it when i was growing up - it’s common in a sporting context when you’re doing the classic mudslinging ‘whose better’ type of thing im p sure.
in other contexts, not so much (but i was probably oblivious and/or not exposed to it much). i do think if a headline abt germant beating the uk/being better than us comes out, the joking response from many here would be abt germant losing 2 world wars tho.
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not-souleaterpost · 4 months ago
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When you deleted your reddit acount because the Soul Eater reddit doesnt like your posts
Nah but for real, say what you want about tumblr, but reddit is so much more anoying - but maybe thats most social media, tried uploading videos on tiktok only to get copyright stuck the same second or just have them deleted for vague comunity guidelines shit, maybe I was too hard on youtube.
I know crying about reddit is pathetic but I dunno, just let me vent lol, idunno gotta get my shit together, too many distractions and other bullshit.
#soul eater reddit#but yeah i dunno I have thin skin so it got annoying when low effort jokes got upvoted while my love effort joke seemed to offend people lo#but in general I saw interesting questions with nobody writting anything to answer#like I get most people dont care and just want to see fanart or whatever but with the death of forums its kinda sad#like it is a kinda “Old” anime so you would assume the fans would be older and have something to say#but tbh I was allways anti reddit so jokes on me for trying to give them a chance and fit in when I just dont vibe with their “style”#like tbh I dont allways with tumblr#but atleast this website is usefull on its own like a blog and all while reddit is just shitting your shit into other peoples faces#and atleast here there are some interesting people with oppinions and shit#I probably should just have written it in the post and not tags lol idk#and I know its my own fault for procrastinating from work and the projects im actually supposed to do#but tbh the lips of the tatoos could be ragnarok lips and the haha's could be laughs of madness so its even more fitting-#but I guess Im the only one who found this joker funny ironically lol i dunno#is there some fancy word for bad impulse control yet or is that just called being a manchild baby?#so yeah i dunno what Im even trying to say anymore just a strange week or something i dont even know#also the iceberg videos didnt get many upvotes anymore so I doubt I lose much visibility but lets see with the next video#which sadly isnt coming soon#maybe now I will actually do the thing I promised myself#I dunno just imagine this is some private theraphy positve reafirmation journal#i'll try to not log in again for a few days or something maybe I should que the post for the screencaps acount for a month and not just wee#idk#yeah...sorry#also fuck reddit#and social media#and tiktok
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bighitfics · 6 months ago
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jeon jungkook fanfics that deserve to be turned into kdramas and selling books.
(a recommendation you badly need) ⭑.ᐟ
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Sauvage ౨ৎ by @tljunglebook
— grumpy x sunshine, cold and detached jungkook (who turns into a whipped puppy later on) office romance, slow burn.
(starting off strong! this book’s got the most delicious slow burn to ever exist! screaming at how sexy, dirty minded, down bad & protective for oc jungkook’s in this fic ugh the wattpad girlies already know that they’re my adopted parents)
10 Seconds ᥫ᭡ by @deepdarkdelights
— yandere jungkook, abduction, stalking, stockholm syndrome.
(this series is my first love, i would do anything to read this for the first time again!)
Penpal 𓍯𓂃 by @laughing-with-god
— yandere prisoner jungkook, stalking, breaking in.
(gotta contact some directors and producers to turn this into a drama! it would slay so hard with its refreshing plot line! and tbh no words are enough to describe her writing abilities, she’s a pro✨)
Risqué ✧˖° by @mercurygguk
— age gap, forbidden romance, smut, angst.
(the time stamps and drabbles are the essence of this fic, the smut is so well written! ALSO THE SEGSUAL TENSION AND OVERALL YEARNING MA’AM!? can someone already turn this into a mini netflix series please!?)
About Time ִ࣪𖤐 by @yoonia
— time travel au, major angst, second chances, smut, fluff.
(if i had the chance to devour a book, i’d eat this one (obviously) it’s one of the best books of my life, i would die to see a live version of this)
I Want You To Stay ʚɞ ⁺˖ by @ahundredtimesover
— ceo jungkook, strangers to lovers, slow burn, angst, smut.
(no slow burn ever slow burned the way this story slow burned! lemme warn ya’ll this fic will keep getting better as you read it!)
Bride Of Devil ♰ 𓏲 ๋࣭  ࣪ ˖ by @jasminefanfics
— dark romance, gangster au, enemies to lovers, forced proximity, age gap, kinda yandere husband jungkook.
(my youtube fanfic girlies assemble! this is the best mafia jungkook fic i can recommend for ya’ll! the bgm is so addictive and perfect)
An Abundance Of Luck And A Sprinkle Of Fate 𐙚 by @borathae
— strangers to lovers, romance, found family, smut, angst, healing.
(I remember being unhealthily obsessed with this lord, aaol!kook & oc will forever be my babies TT this book tugs at your heart in a way that’s inexplainable)
ps — have a good read girlies <3
follow for more.
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fortunately-bi · 8 months ago
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...... If I went on a hiatus for who knows how long again would y'all hate me....... 👉👈
#i just spent like an hour writing and rewriting a post trying to explain myself amd its just so hard to put into words#im bored here but not in a ew not enough content for the dopamine hit shit#in like a every time i scroll through I dont smile I dont see anything that makes me happy at all i dont get a laugh or anything#its just mindless brain rotting scrolling nothing wasting my time hoping maybe ill see a new artist to follow or something#and every time its nothing#so much nothing taking up so much of my time and space in my life and i already dont have a lot of time to begin with#ive made some awesome friends here ive had lovers from here ive had people who are no longer on this earth from here who ill never forget#i dont think ive really enjoyed anything on here in 7 years#ive left before for a really long time i think like a year or more or something#and i wont be totally unreachable of people message me ill respond but im so sick of this stupid app taking up my life#and all i ever get out of it is getting mad or getting depressed over shit that really is t worth my mental state over#all i ever feel on here is that the world fuckin sucks and theres not even anything here to make hanging around worth it#im not new to this site making me suicidal for an abundance of reasons and im luckily in a spot where i wont actually hurt myself#its just ideation and intrusive thoughts but its a pattern i cant keep ignoring#also im old tumblr im old tumblr and i think i will always be old tumblr im just not catching on to new shit anymore#the fact im even saying anything about a hiatus should show how pld tumblr i am no one does this anymore lol#i just don't want to be here anymore i dont really want to be anywhere online anymore tbh#its always something and i cant mentally keep up with it anymore i have too much going on in my life#my wife is having cancer removed on Tuesday im a lead teacher who has to take care of i think 8 babies now#i have problems i have actual problems that need me and need me to be as there as i can be#i cant be spiraling over stuff online on top of real world problems im in no position to do anything about on top of personal life problems#that are drastically affecting my life at home and hurting my family and loved ones#i have a mass in my thyroid which is so big i choke to the point i stop breathing if I dont have my meds i throw up all day#i have to see a neurologist because at best i have a pinched nerve at worst im having seizures and i might have to move states again#i dont have it in me to come on here and see stuff that makes me upset for the chance i might see something i like#and i can unfollow people and whatever but I dont have the energy or time to sift through people i follow on here#if you want to talk in dms or asks or you want to send me posts pls by all means continue to do so thats fine#but i think i need to take the app out of my line of sight again for a bit and just be in the moment again same with twitter#anyways i love yall i promise i am safe and not in harms way im just stressed af and i have got to start cutting things out that#arent doing anything other then making me miserable
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peaceeandcoolestvibes · 2 months ago
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Amen,, they think I’ll somehow say yes and I don’t even talk to them
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saetoru · 1 year ago
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✩ ‧₊˚ ✩。yours, always yours
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synopsis. satoru has always been yours—and he needs you to know you’ll also always be his
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— word count. 2.4k (read the breakup fic first for better understanding, but can be read as a stand-alone)
— contents. fem! reader, college! au, rich boy! gojo, post-getting back together angst that gets a little heated <3, minors do not interact, fingering, unprotected sex, edging, satoru cumming too quick <3, creampie, tbh the smut is short and a lil rushed my b, it ends in fluff tho !! trust !! there is fluff !!
— notes. tbh this will probably get flagged rly fast but oh well u win some u lose some. anywayyyyy here is the make up sex bc yall nasties deserve it <3 jk love u guys
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satoru falls first. and he falls hard. everyone knows it, it’s never been a secret.
“you want me to wash your hair?” you ask gently, kissing his shoulder as the water falls over his head. he hums, nodding absentmindedly as he stares blankly at the tiles of your shower wall.
“sure,” he mumbles, “don’t tug.”
“i never tug,” you roll your eyes, snorting. he huffs a small chuckle, but it’s not the usual laugh satoru gives you. it’s mechanic, almost—just there to fill the space. “baby?” you ask softly.
“yeah?” he asks, “oh, should i bend a little? sorry, i—”
“what’re you thinking about?” your hands cup his cheeks, gentle and warm from the hot water as it soaks his skin.
he shakes his head, trying to smile as he clears throat. “just how nice it is to be pampered. maybe i’ll let you break my heart every once in a while so i get my back scrubbed and hair washed like this.”
“satoru,” you insist. you know—and he knows it too. “tell me?”
“why’d you do it?” he mumbles, “why’d you listen to him?”
“toru, you know why,” you sigh, “you know i didn’t think there were any other options.”
“you could’ve talked to me,” he furrows his brows, “just because my stupid old man threatens you with my stupid inheritance doesn’t mean we have to break up.”
“i was afraid you’d choose me.” it comes out as a whisper, like a confession you can’t bear to admit.
“i would have chosen you,” he agrees, “why’s that bad? how’s that wrong—”
“you’re not thinking about the bigger picture,” you shake your head, “that company is yours. you’ve spent your whole life—”
“so what? was i supposed to give up the rest of my life for it too?” he asks tiredly—satoru’s defeated. he’s never been defeated, it’s the most magnetizing thing about him.
even before you date him. he asks and asks and asks no matter how many times you say no. because there’s always a chance you’ll say yes, and he’ll never stop as long as there’s a chance.
“i’m sorry,” you sniffle, lips wobbling, “i could have….i should have said something. i didn’t want you to make a choice young and then….and then regret it.”
“you think i’d regret you?” he’s wounded—absolutely wounded at the words.
satoru has always been careful, diligent and so, so meticulous to love you right, to love you how you need to be loved. hadn’t that proven enough? that he was in it for the long run—for forever? he’d been so sure you’d be his future, that the break up feels like waking up from a peaceful dream to a house fire—devastating, with smoke in his nose and lungs that he can’t breathe right, and everything gone within a moment before he can even register it.
he stares at the ashes in despair. nothing prepared him for the hollowness of not being yours—because satoru has never cared to make you his. all he’s ever wanted was to be yours.
you’re quick to remove him from everything, deleting pictures from your socials, untagging him from posts, removing him from your private stories and close friends list. he doesn’t understand how you could change your mind so quickly—and then he realizes you probably don’t. because he knows you—better than anyone ever has, satoru knows you.
so he’s comes to you, drenched from the rain, from standing outside your door even as the water pelts against his skin because he’s determined. he’s going to get an answer out of you, going to make you explain why you pulled him in so close, let him reside in your heart and fall asleep to the comforting rhythm of its beating—and then push him out like he’s nothing. what made you push him out?
and finally, when he does, when you let him be yours again and admit it’s never what you wanted, that it’s because it’s what his father wanted—well, satoru can’t keep his composure. don’t you know? hadn’t he always told you? hadn’t he poured his heart out and let you know every moment he’s always been stuck dangling from his father’s fingers? stuck somewhere between the sky and ground, too high to feel the floor under his feet but never high enough to feel the wind in his face.
you’ve always known, always listened—and fuck, you held him some nights too, let your fingers dip into his hair and soothe his sorrows of always being stuck.
satoru’s always been stuck, always had every choice made for him and every instruction carefully laid out on the table. and then you decided to make his choice for him too, walking away and choosing his future for him like he’s never had a say.
he’s always been stuck, but never with you—but now, he wonders if that’s changed.
“no,” you squeeze his cheeks, “no i don’t think you’d regret me….but satoru losing what you have is a big thing,” you mumble, “people work their whole lives not having a fraction of what you do. that’s a lot to let you lose.”
“i’ve never seen my dad kiss my mom,” he stares at you, hard and unwavering, his eyes stare into yours, “he’s never held her hand or made her laugh. and you know what she told me? that she would sell her share of everything to have what we do. why do you always look at me for what i have first?” he asks angrily, the water pouring over his shoulders as they shake, “why can’t you just look at me first for once?”
“i do look at you,” you insist, “toru, all i ever see is you—”
“then stop caring what he says,” he says louder, his voice echoing through the small bathroom of your small apartment.
everything about your home is small—smaller than satoru’s especially. but he loves it, thinks he’d rather be here than anywhere else.
because it’s yours. and as long as you’re here, the world fits into this tiny apartment, the galaxy too.
“okay,” you say shakily. and then you nod, looking him in the eye, “you’ll handle it?”
he nods, kissing between your brows, “yeah, i’ll handle it. who else is gonna take over that company anyway?”
“but what if he finds someone else? and then he—”
“he won’t. my grandpa will shred him.”
“but he’s old, and he stepped down, so what really can he do if your dad decides—”
“god, baby,” he groans, pushing your body against the wall gently, “i love your voice, but you talk so much. i’m wanna listen to something else.”
his lips find your neck, sucking gently at the skin, hand trailing to your tits before his thumb circles your nipple. it’s slow, deliberate, teasing as it rolls over the bud.
you whimper, clutching onto him as a breathy, “t-toru,” leaves your lips.
“yeah,” he nods, “that’s what i wanna listen to instead.” his lips are in a grin against your neck, kissing and biting until he reaches your collarbone. “anyone dm you after you took me out of your socials?” he asks bitterly.
“j-just one,” you admit through a stutter, “b-but i didn’t even open it! i wasn’t really—oh, toru,” you gasp as his finger finds your clit, spreading your legs as he lets out a soft growl at your words.
“what? just cause my face isn’t on your instagram suddenly you’re not mine?” he asks, thumb rubbing harsh circles against the sensitive bundle of nerves—you close your eyes, moaning as your arms wrap tightly around his neck. “you’re always mine,” he murmurs against your ear, low and careful so you hear him well, “yeah? got that?”
“got it,” you nod furiously.
“got what?”
“‘m al-always—oh, fuck,” you mewl as one finger prods at your entrance, gathering your slick before slowly sliding through your walls.
“c’mon, sweetheart,” he says firmly, “finish your sentences.”
“always yours, toru! always yours—please, please j-just…”
“just what?” he raises a brow.
“more,” you sob—it’s a broken plea as your hips thrust against his finger.
he’s quick to slide in a second, thrusting his digits mercilessly into your soaked cunt, his palm gliding over your clit as the slick sound of his fingers fucking you is almost drowned by the water in the back.
your water bill will be high this month. you decide it’s a sacrifice satoru deserves.
“you think someone could ever learn this body better than me? make you cum like i can? you think anyone will ever love you enough to learn you like i do?”
“n-no,” you pant, his fingers hitting that spot inside of you so perfectly, you feel that dull ache build up quickly. it’s good—everything with satoru is good. his other hand finds your chest to pinch a nipple, twisting and squeezing until your nails leave indents on his shoulders as you moan loudly. “no one—no one but you.”
“exactly,” he growls, “how could you leave me? how could you leave us?”
“‘m sorry,” you sniffle, whimpering when the tips of his fingers slam against that spongey spot of your walls, fluttering around him and squeezing him in. you’re close—so close that you almost don’t know what he’s saying anymore, too focused on the way your impending orgasm is approaching. fast. “i’m sorry, i’ll never—ever leave again.”
“say you love me,” he demands.
it sounds like he’s pleading, though, if you listen closely. there’s a small crack in his voice, a slight shakiness that makes you force your eyes open and stare at him and whisper, “i love you, satoru. i love you.”
and then he rips his fingers out—right before you’re about to cum. you gasp, pleading nonsense as you cling to him and buck your hips and search for something, anything to take you over the edge.
and then you hear a sniffle. is he crying? is that wet droplet on your shoulder a tear or the water? you’re too busy calming down from your orgasm dying before it ever came to focus.
satoru’s hard against your thigh, throbbing and painful to sink into you. he strokes himself a few times, whimpers as his thumb gathers the pre cum from the sensitive tip, smearing it along his length as he shakily lets out a quiet moan.
“f-fuck, i gotta feel you. please, can i? please—”
“yes,” you pull him closer, grinding your heat over his hard-on, “yes please, toru. more, need more.”
he’s sliding along your folds, dragging the tip of his cock along your entrance and smearing a mix of your arousal with his. and then slowly, ever so gently, he’s pushing into your after that, pushing past your walls and bullying into your soaked cunt, curving into you perfectly.
it’s only been a week—you feel like you haven’t felt him in years. but it’s familiar. you remember every part of him, including every vein that drags along your walls and makes your head spin. he remembers every part of you, including where that spot is that he needs to angle his hips to find.
he slams into you, hard and rough and fast—doesn’t even let you adjust your position to hold onto him tighter before he’s thrusting his hips and fucking into you desperately. you can feel him, every inch of his skin against you, every part of him that’s touching you. and you can feel the way his cock nudges past your folds, the friction burning pleasure through ever nerve.
satoru knows how to fuck you, just like he knows how to love you, he knows your body—every dip and ever curve, every place to touch and every part that has you gushing around him. it’s just the way he is, too good at giving you what you want, what you need.
when he moans, it’s breathy and he’s panting as he lets out those soft whimpers that make your head spin. “feel that? feel me?” he asks, grunting as you squeeze around his length.
“yeah,” you breathe, “‘m so full.”
“i need you. please, please,” he murmurs, “can’t lose you, baby. never you,” he chants, the quiver in his voice tearing you apart.
“i’m right here,” you gasp, lacing your fingers with his and squeezing his hand. he squeezes back, just to let you know he’s there too, “right here, baby. you got me.”
and then he cums, just as soon as you whisper that—he spills right into you with a broken cry, his hips rolling, needy and desperate and so, so lost on the pleasure. he’s too busy working himself through his high, trembling over your body to care he’s cum too quick—and you don’t have it in you to tease him. you can feel the hot ropes of cum filling you, painting your walls white, fucking deep into you as the blunt head of his cock slams into you without a second of hesitation.
but he doesn’t stop, doesn’t falter that brutal pace as his hips slam into you, perfectly kissing your sweet spot every time. and before long, you break—your head pushes back against the wall behind you, mouth parted as you wail his name and cum—hard. you’re quivering and spasming around his swollen cock, enough that he whimpers at the way you’re so tight.
it’s good, it’s always good. satoru makes you feel good. he’s the best you’ve ever had—the best you’ll ever find.
and then you hear it again, the sniffle into your neck as he clutches you tightly. you know for sure that wet droplet is a tear this time, and your fingers tangle into his hair as you stroke the wet strands.
“i love you, toru,” you murmur, “my sweet boy. i’m sorry, okay? i’m so sorry.”
“don’t do that again,” he huffs in between tears, “that was so mean. so mean.”
“i said i won’t,” you chuckle, fighting back your own tears, “how long are you gonna hold this against me?”
“how long do you plan on being mine?”
“well,” you pull him from your neck, cupping his cheeks as you wipe away tears and peck his lips softly, “i think….forever.”
“well, get ready, then,” he glares softly, “i’m gonna hold this against you forever too.”
“okay,” you nod, “that’s fair.”
“and i love you too,” he adds, “but block whoever dm’d you. it better not be that zenin boy.”
“block those girls who’s pictures you liked,” you shoot back, glaring at him with a pout of your own.
“don’t yell at me,” he mumbles, leaning into your touch as your thumb strokes his cheek, “i’ve had a rough week. you have to be nice.”
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dabitee anon. are u seeing this. did u see the satoru who cums too fast. did u see it. report back if u saw this. i repeat, dabitee anon report back if you see this
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