#later tho bc i have to finish procrastinating now

[love-3-crimes]

im going on a trip tomorrow for a week and probably wont be very active btw!!

[valeffelees]

An Ask Game for Writers to Procrastinate Working on Your WIP(s)

thank you kindly for tagging me @shrekgogurt @youarenevertooold, and @monbons i've been seeing this game make its rounds on my dash and was really hoping someone would pull me in!

🦈 Tell us the name of one of your WIP(s)

my main three wips at the moment are without sun, ballad of the final sparrow, which is more commonly known as bitverse, and fragile things (and how to break them), but i've also been fucking around a bit the last two or three weeks with a new (terrible, evil, very self-indulgent) wip called god-forbid.

🍄 Describe one of your WIPs in the format of “___ + ___ =___”  

i think i might be dumb bc i don't understand this question at all.

🌍 What tags or warnings will your WIP(s) need if you intend to share it?

bitverse: heavy angst, psychological horror elements, alcohol abuse, allusions to suicide, unhealthy coping mechanisms, dead dove: do not eat.

🧭 An alternative title to one of your WIP(s)?

ballad of the final sparrow -> baz is typing fragile things (and how to break them) -> there's a werewolf in london god-forbid -> the gap between a tragedy and comedy

⚠️ Which WIP you’re most likely to finish or update next?

i have no idea. i mean, you'd think the answer would be without sun since it's the only fic i actually have posted at the moment, but unfortunately i am an untrustworthy villain.

💾 What is the document of your WIP called? (Not the story title, but what you’ve saved it as.)

same as the fic title. if i start a new wip and don't know what to call it, i'll pick something at random and add (working title) at the end.

🖍 Post any sentence from your WIP

from without sun:

“You don’t like peppermint,” he says. But maybe she does. Maybe that’s one more thing he can add to his growing list of things he got wrong about Agatha Wellbelove. No. 1 — Dislikes peppermint; actually, she is quite fond of it. No. 2 — Likes Simon Snow; him, not so much.

♻️ A scrapped idea for your current WIP

one of the biggest changes i made to the plot of without sun really early on was penelope's role in the story. i had a clear idea of the story i wanted to tell as soon as i saw the prompt for the fic. without sun was always supposed to be about more than simon and baz. the story is about grief and love, and the space we take up in the lives of the people around us. but n e way, in my orig draft, penny was actually supposed to be able to communicate with simon a bit, and there was gonna be a whole sect of scenes in the middle of the fic where they sat around together trying to break simon's curse what we know and what we don't know style via passing notes. i ended up tossing this idea really quickly tho, and i'm glad i did bc one of my favourite moments i've ever written in any fic happens in chapter two of without sun and it belongs to simon and penny.

🤔 What’s a story you’d love to write but haven’t even started yet?

so many. or, well—what counts as "haven't even started"? i hate to let ideas sit around in my head bc it feels like leaving raspberries in the fridge for too long, like that shit is gonna get mould on it, so usually the first thing i do is rough out a few scenes and/or script out a very rough outline of the plot (like this / this / this style) so that i have something to come back to later. i have dozens of zero drafts just lying tf around. but otherwise, yeah, so many. one big idea i have is called heart on fire and it's based on fanart, but i haven't started it yet bc obvs i wanna get permission from the artist first but i've been holding off reaching out to them about it until i've knocked a few of my less intimidating longfics off my wip list bc heart on fire is gonna fucking hefty so i don't wanna give'r until i'm sure i can manage it.

🤡 How many WIPs are you actively working on?

LMFAO

🛠 Is there a scene or anything in the WIP you are struggling with right now?

i'm having a real bitch of a time with agatha's main scene in chapter two of without sun, i've been fighting with it on and off for months, but i can't get it to do what i want it to do.

❤️ Not a question, just a second kudos to send.

cheers!

sorry for any doubles but, tagging: @drowninginships @cosmicalart @that-disabled-princess @fatalfangirl @cutestkilla @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @artsyunderstudy @thewholelemon @roomwithanopenfire @hushed-chorus @blackberrysummerblog @imagineacoolusername @nightimedreamersworld @prettygoododds @confused-bi-queer @mooncello and an open tag for anybody else who wants to procrastinate their wips!

[sunfyress]

so i see a lot of people talking about how the asoiaf fandom treats it’s female characters today and i figured that i would give my two cents on it (also, it gives me a reason to procrastinate writing my history essay lmao).

first off, read this post by @maesterleia because they explained my exact thoughts better than i ever could.

female characters are treated are with a double standard compared to male character -- which, unfortunately, is very typical in all fandoms but it seems to be taken to the extreme in asoiaf, a book series that does everything possible to make it’s characters as nuanced and shaded grey as possible. and while most of the male characters are analyzed with that in mind, every female character either must be a) a perfect woman that has never done or even think a wrong thing or b) an evil, scheming seductress who’s probably going to end up a worse war criminal than tywin lannister.

forget nuance, forget complexities of the human nature, forget being human -- women are not allowed to be flawed here and if they are, they must be a villain. it’s like @maesterleia wrote in their post “Why is a female character having flaws seen as detrimental? Because this mindset is rooted in the idea that only villainous female characters are allowed to have flaws. Cersei, for example, can be dissected and analyzed critically because she’s on the villainous side of the narrative. She’s complex and sympathetic, but still largely classified as a villain (generally), and therefore, she is--according to this mindset--allowed to be flawed.” 

it’s a ridiculous ideology and the cause of so many stupid and pointless fandom wars. the idea that a hero that happens to be female must be free of any flaws or arcs where they battle with their own morality when male characters like jon snow or robb stark is judged the same way makes no sense to me. 

why isn’t jon judged for the way he called myrcella “insipid” for smiling at robb and being an eight year old girl or how he was classist and insensitive to his other night watch’s recruits in the beginning of agot the same way sansa was mean and insensitive to arya? why isn’t robb talked about descending into madness or dictatorship after he ordered the execution of rickard stark the same way daenerys is talked about after she ordered the execution of the slave masters? why is tywin admired for being ambitious but cersei or margaery or arianne is called a scheming slut for having ambitions too? why isn’t ned shamed for taking a young theon away from his home and culture and forcing him to live as a hostage the same way catelyn is shamed for not being a mother to her husband’s bastard? hell, why is jaime considered to be morally superior than cersei, who yes is a very bad and terrible person, when he tried to kill an eight year old boy and still shows no remorse, why he is the good lannister and worthy of redemption but cersei is not?

the unfair and ridiculous double standard is of no use when it comes to analyzing the female characters and the only thing it does is caused the fandom to pit women against each other. the “sansa vs daenerys” debate or the “arya vs sansa” or the “elia vs lyanna” debate, all discussion full of misogyny -- deciding which character is better by saying who hasn’t done any wrong things (all of them have done some not-so-great things and all of have them done even more great things, give it a break guys) or who’s better by who’s more feminine or who’s less feminine (ridiculous AND sexist, especially considering it’s possible to be both feminine and masculine and not just one or the other). This also goes hand in hand with the idea that there is only allowed to be One female character that can be the hero in the series and all the others must be either be their enemy or something to prop them up -- all while most of the fandom can find it in themselves to have multiple complex male characters in their heart.

the whole ideology that male characters can have flaws and make mistake and still be considered capable of redemption, or capable of learning, or still a good person while such ideas can’t be afforded to female characters is fucking toxic and a great way to make a fandom unbearable to be in.

[noxtivagus]

OH I JUST REMEMBERED RN i shld play games on my switch again, it's been a long time ><

[bo0zey]

my friend who doesn’t have adhd and just wants an adderall perscription: i definitely have adhd like i never pay attention and i’m such a procrastinator omg lol btw i’m at the library studying and doing homework that’s not due until 3 days ugh what are you doing have you started studying yet we have those worksheets due tomorrow remember and it’s already 6pm! omg what do u mean u haven’t started the paper yet it’s literally due in 3 hrs omg no it’s ok i’ll just send u mine bc i’ve been working on it all day haha and omg i’m trying to pay attention to the lecture can u stop talking to me why r u reading online manga in class the exam is in 2 days pay attention! also i need caffeine to stay awake i love monster energy drinks they work so well i won’t be able to sleep tonight oh no also i took adderall 3hrs ago and now i’m super anxious but it’s not the adderall lol ugh i won’t be able to sleep tonjght ughh

me, someone who actually has adhd, pre-diagnosis: studying is so hard and i don’t want to do it and i literally can’t until hours before the exam and by then i’m so exhausted bc it’s like 3am but if i drink coffee or monster or bang i just get sleepier also i procrastinate entire research papers including the research hours before the due date even tho i knew abt the paper for a month and i wrote it in my assignment notebook every day knowing i needed to do it and i drink coffee before bed bc it relaxes me n makes me sleepy im constantly moving and shifting in my seat in class and i got paid 4 hrs ago and bought $500 worth of amazon products and now i don’t have any money for groceries for the next 2 weeks my thoughts go so fast and they’re so loud i can’t follow a conversation let alone a class lecture paying attention to anything i don’t care abt but am supposed to is impossible if i don’t write everything i need to do down i will forget about it and if i put my keys or vape or anything somewhere besides it’s designated spot for 1 minute i will literally forget where it is and if something isn’t directly in my line of sight i will forget i have it so i have to place everything in my line of sight for me to remember to use it and ok i’m at work i have a 14hr shift and a set of tasks i need to complete omg i’m so overwhelmed and frazzled i write down the list of tasks every shift and check off boxes to remember to do things but even then i still fall behind and why am i overwhelmed i know what i have to do please don’t ask me to do that thing i’m already trying to remember to do one thing ahhh ok i’m so exhausted it’s 12am and everyone’s asleep i have 3hrs left of my shift omg i’m so bored and tired ok i will have coffee and an energy drink to wake up bc i don’t wanna fall asleep here and i have an hour drive back home and oh wow i am now driving on the way and dozing off i am so sleepy sleepy sleepy why can’t i stay i awake i had 300mg of caffeine like 2hrs ago i’m going to crash the car why isn’t this energy drink working and hmm ok it’s now monday night i have school tmrw it’s 11pm i guess i’ll try n sleep i have class at 9am oh wait what is this sudden wakefulness i feel i am very awake i think i will maybe try to do homework to get tired actually no i think i will go on the internet instead hmm look at those cool show i think i will watch it ugh ok that was the longest 30min of my life i will not be able to watch another episode for at least 2 days probably oh it’s 3am i need to sleep but i can’t shut my brain off ugh oh no this sucks i hate myself why can’t i just get my shit together i know what i have to do but i just can’t fucking do it it’s so frustrating i’m trying so hard but i keep self sabotaging why why why

me, after being diagnosed w adhd and starting medication: wow for the first time in 8 years i’m actually paying attention in class and actively following what my professor is saying. i think i will do some homework now so i am not overwhelmed later. uh oh my dishes are starting to stack up i think i will clean them instead of starting a new pile. hmm my room is getting a little messy i think i will put things away including the clean clothes on that chair i’d been avoiding putting away for a week. i am following our conversation and i will wait until you are finished until it is my turn to speak instead of blurting out or interrupting you. oh i just got paid! hmm do i really need all of that online shopping stuff..? i think i will wait for a little bit and come back to it if i rlly want it bc what if something happens during the week and i need money to pay for it? oh i have to go to work it’s a 14hr shift; i am able to complete the tasks i need to do with ease bc i know what to do and when to do them and am no longer overwhelmed. i don’t need to drink that energy drink bc i know it will just make me more sleepy and i’ll doze off at the wheel on the highway and i don’t want that! ok i’m home yawn i think i will try n go to sleep it’s 11pm and i am genuinely tired.

[sdaomine]

The NXX Team Visits the Philippines 🇵🇭 Part III

all hail our elegant king vyn richter for surviving the hell of southeast asian commuting! and kudos to kids luke and marius for being the sacrificial lambs—real men who willingly took their spots outside the jeepney and held on for dear life. these two deserve sum buffet 🍱

i didn't want to write this yet bc im too lazy these days, but i really, really wanted to write about luke running after a pickpocket in divisoria and vyn eating at mang inasal and these won't happen unless i finish this one. good job, self. *pats my back

last note: pretty please forgive my rusty writing. my writing prowess has significantly decreased these days because my essays piled up and being the procrastinator that i am, i crammed every single one and now i have no braincells for writing left. so bear with me and my never-to-be-proofread work.

pt 1 | pt 2 | pt 3 (ill fix the links soon pls i need sleep)

smack!

“ow! that hurt...”

it's the third time marius von hagen has been hit by grandma ellen's (abaniko/native) fan. on the head. hard.

“what did i tell you, brat?” vyn scoffs beside him, arms folded, brows furrowed. “the elders here are highly-respected. whatever happened to saying ‘po’ and ‘opo’, von hagen?”

po and opo basically means ‘yes’ but in a more respective way. these are the common words used by filipinos to show their respect to their elders (not limited to elders, tho. ah. hard to explain. whatever)

“sure, sure. you and your lessons.”

“what did you say?”

“hey, you two.” luke frowns as he crosses his arms. “quit bickering, will you? just for today. besides, we have a birthday party to enjoy!”

marius rolls his eyes. “what are you, seven?”

“just reminding you that i'm—”

“ahem.” artem clears his throat to capture the team's attention. “we have a problem,” he says, “i... i am also not fond of birthday parties.”

their attention switches to rosa, who suddenly bursts out laughing. “artem,” she looks at the senior attorney, “how is that a problem? does someone need to be good at parties? and mind you, this isn't exactly a children's party...”

she finds vyn carefully fiddling with his glasses, face amused. “of course not, my rose. one does not need to be fond of parties, you are correct,” he responds with his cool, steady tone. “but our witness—the birthday celebrator—specifically asked the team to... fully participate in the event; in games, to be exact. in return, she will agree to work with us as one of our witnesses.”

“... and? what's wrong with that?”

“what's wrong is that the first game begins now,” says artem, his face a tad sweaty, as if he's nervous about what's going to happen next. “and they're expecting a hundred percent participation from us.”

rosa's eyes brighten in both amusement and curiosity. “... really?”

“yeah.” luke beams at everyone. “and the first game is to determine who's got the longest happy birthday!”

rosa raises a brow, confused. “longest what?”

a few moments later.

rosa, luke, and marius stand beside each other on the stage.

all of them are frickin’ giddy with excitement

game number one: longest happy birthday. an exercise in vocal calisthenics (aka the perfect excuse for kids with excess energy to put their lung power to good use).

participants are tasked to say "happy birthday" and draw out the last syllable until they run out of breath. whoever holds out the longest and manages not to keel over wins.

player one: marius von hagen.

“player number one, are you ready?” asks the host, leveling the microphone on marius's lips. with overflowing confidence, marius puts on his signature smirk and answers, “hell yeah!”

the crowd cheers in anticipation, boosting his confidence and elation. “well then, if you're ready! one, two, three, g—”

with full force, marius grabs the microphone and screams at the top of his lungs. “HAPPY BIRTHDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA~”

a few seconds later. “—aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa~~”

rosa observes him, preparing herself. she needs to surpass marius's lung power to get her victory. he screamed during the first try, he must be getting breathless now...

“aaaaaaaaaaaaaa”

rosa narrows her eyes. shit, he's not yet stopping.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA”

rosa's brows turns into a stormy frown. n-nani?! what kind of lung power is this? ... could it be, marius? ARE YOU SECRETLY TAKING SINGING LESSONS?

“aaaaAAAAAAEAEAEAEAEEECHKKKKK”

damn it, marius! are your disintegrating breaths even counted?!

“i think you underestimated him, watson,” luke chuckles beside her. “you won't do that to me, yeah?”

rosa rolls her eyes and shakes her head. “i can't do that even if i wanted to.” she lets out a heavy sigh, weighing the possibilities of winning. “but i won't give up just yet!”

on the other hand, marius runs out of breath. “AAAAAAAAAHHHHCKKKKkkkkkkk”

luke crosses his arms, his face beaming with excitement. “aaaand he's out.”

“what do you mean, out?!” marius pants, both hands resting on his slightly-bent knees. he really is out of breath. “that was one long happy birthday, pearce!”

“that's my bare minimum.”

“wha—”

“wow, that was amazing, player one!” the host pats marius on the back before taking a step in front of rosa. “player one was up for a good start. he set the bar pretty high,” he tells her, “do you think you can beat that?”

rosa leans closer to the microphone. “i will beat him,” she says, “you'll see.”

“eh? so confident, missy.”

“you bet.”

“player two, are you ready?” asks the host. the crowd cheers again, louder this time.

rosa wraps her fingers around the microphone and nods. “i'm ready.”

“well then! three, two, one, go!”

she takes a deep breath—and goes at it at moderate power so she won't run out of breath quickly. “happy birthdaaaaaaaaa~”

“nice technique,” luke whispers. but not enough to beat me.

“aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa”

rosa is now ten seconds left to surpassing marius's record, and the audience begins to chant her name in anticipation. will she beat marius or not?

the host covers his mouth in surprise. “woah! player two is two seconds close to player one's record!”

marius scowls, but he sees vyn sitting peacefully among the crowd, seemingly enjoying himself—legs crossed and smiling that it doesn't matter anymore if marius loses.

oh, you, the young von hagen tells himself. you're so fucking pretty when you smile.

marius anxiously and repeatedly stomps his feet. now he wants to go straight back home, grab an empty canvas, some paint, then lose himself in the beauty of his beloved's image as he paints him.

he wonders if the team already knows. he and vyn had been carelessly dropping hints these past few days. not that he cares, anyway. he'd love everyone to know that the handsome, brilliant psychiatrist was his.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA”

marius snaps out of his thoughts when he hears rosa's voice getting higher and higher, probably on its way into a high-pitched scream. “that desperate to snatch victory for yourself, eh missy?” he smirks.

“aaaaaaaaYYYYYYYYYYYHHHHHHHH—hahhh!"

rosa hoists both of her arms and squeals, eyes shut as she repeatedly jumps up and down in celebration. “i did it! i did it! i beat marius!”

marius pats her on the back as he pouts at her. “one-saaan...”

she frowns. “hey, don't give me that look... i won fair and square—”

“good job, player two!” interrupts the host, now taking a step towards luke. “but the game isn't finished yet. player three,” he hands luke the spare microphone, “can you beat her record?”

luke confidently speaks over the mic. “you may be my best friend, watson, but i'm not gonna spare you,” he warns rosa, “besides, when did you ever beat me to party games?”

a few moments later, rosa is consoling a heartbroken detective as he slouches sadly on the monoblock chair.

“h-hey, luke... it's alright now,” she whispers to him. “psst, sherlock? talk to meeeee.”

“yeah, man. it's not her fault that you lost,” chimes marius, his tone a bit teasing. “also not my fault that your throat itched while you're at it.”

you see, luke pearce was one second close to beating rosa's record, and even ready to take more, but...

... fuck. i-is my throat itching?

“player three is five seconds close to player two's record!”

oh fuck it really is itching i'm about to cough

“two seconds close!”

but i'm close! just one second more, one second more—

*coughs*

which leads to our situation right now.

“i was so close, so close...” says luke, his coral eyes filled with longing. suddenly he stands and faces marius and rosa. “i'm going to beat you on the next game!”

rosa sighs. “you mean the game after that?”

“huh?” he asks, “the game after that? we're not playing the next one?”

“yes,” says vyn, still perched on a chair and cross-legged. “congratulations is in order, my rose,” he tells rosa, “let us see if artem will exert an effort to bring home a second victory, yes?”

everyone turns to look at the senior attorney, whose face is now bright-red, his eyes definitely avoiding eye contact.

finally, artem sighs. “i... i will do my best.”

game number two: flick the calamansi. calamansi is also known as lime.

honestly, artem is quite confident with himself; the team trusts him in this game, too, knowing he's a sharpshooter—meaning artem has good aim. so he'll prolly be able to win this game, right?

well, let's see about that.

the game is simple. a tiny lime is placed atop a soda bottle. the players will be spun three to five times (upper body slightly bending forward) before they are tasked to quickly run towards the lime and flick it while their other hand covers one eye.

it sounds easy. but wait until artem tries it.

“artem wing!” calls the host, and artem walks forward. “please bend forward, just a little! i'll spin you around now, okay?”

“y-yes—okay.”

as the host does their thing with artem, rosa turns to ask vyn, “can artem really flick the lime? it sounds too easy.”

“i am not certain myself, rosa. this is the first time i have heard of such a game,” he replies, his golden eyes still fixed on the host and artem. “but artem has good aim, that is why we entrusted this task to him. is that right?”

“why won't you do it yourself?” asks marius. “don't you have good aim as an archer—”

vyn's features turn into a slight scowl. he lets out a heavy yet relaxed breath before forcing a smile. “marius, shut the fuck up.”

marius didn't get the chance to respond, for rosa squeals excitedly, “oh, artem! he's gonna run for it now!”

“aaaand the fifth spin, go!” the host announces, signalling for artem to cover one eye and make a run for the lime.

the team's focus is fixated on artem as the senior attorney swiftly treads towards the lime, his long legs and big steps serving him as his ultimate headstart. he reaches the lime faster than everyone else.

artem bends forward, fingers ready to flick the target. everything seems to go by fast. artem feels only overwhelming confidence, seeing the lime just in front of him, completely in sight, so vulnerable and too easy to flick away from where it lay.

vyn's brows furrow in anticipation. “now, the most awaited part.”

flick!

... what?

artem stares at the lime in confusion. it didn't even move. but he swore to himself he was looking straight at it; he was almost a hundred percent certain he'd flick it.

wait, what? how did that happen?

artem was so sure he touched it. his face is only a few inches away from the lime, and in his line of vision, his aim was as perfect as it could be.

he knows he only has one chance of flicking it, but fuck the rules—artem blinks his eyes and reaches to try and flick the lime for the second time.

and fails.

“what the fuck?”

among the crowd, the nxx team has their mouths agape except vyn. “he missed,” he tells them, “and missed again. i almost see his nostrils flaring.”

“artem really missed...” says rosa, more to herself than the team. she couldn't believe artem missed the lime. “it must be because he was spun five times?”

“yeah. and one eye is covered. that's pretty hard, you know,” says luke, wrapping an arm around rosa's shoulders. “and you basically have to sprint towards the lime and flick it fast. i think i'd miss it too.”

congratulations, artem! you're finally pissed!

artem sighs and whispers to himself, “i... i think i'm going to palpitate.”

game three: newspaper dance. in this game, a pair is tasked to dance around a sheet of newspaper—and once the music stops, both parties need to be inside the paper area. the paper gets folded in half, then another half; the process is repeated until only one person can fit in aka the stronger person needs to carry the other one. the pair who endures the diminishing paper wins!

pair one: lukerosa.

pair two: vynmarius.

artem is given some time to relax so he could move on from his first ever loss which hurt him and his 99.9% winrate in court.

lively music fill the space, and all pairs begin to dance around their respective newspapers on the floor.

luke and rosa seem to be having the time of their lives, while marius is doing his best to help vyn let loose and have fun instead of being so competitive.

“look at them, they seem to be having fun. we should do that too, you know,” says marius in a cool yet teasing tone—right before he slides a hand on vyn's waist, pulling the man closer to him. “you don't want to have fun?”

the sudden gesture earns him a low gasp from the psychiatrist, but vyn brushes it off immediately and looks directly into his eyes. “do you not want to win this thing, marius?” he asks rather seductively, his lips just a few inches away from the young von hagen's. “tell me you want to. win it with me, marius.”

“do i get a reward?”

“if we do win, perhaps i could—”

“we will,” says marius. “i'll give it to you.”

“oh? and what do you wish in return?”

with that smirk across his lips, it was an easy feat for vyn to know what exactly was running inside marius's mind.

and it's not clean. just pure filth.

“just give me you, vyn,” says marius, “and i'll be yours all night.”

the music stops. all pairs step inside the paper, and the cycle repeats until there are only three pairs left, including vyn and marius, and luke and rosa.

the newspapers are already folded in its last possible size. in this scenario, only one foot can fit in. actually, marius and luke can only fit half their foot on it since they have bigger foot sizes. (👀)

the music plays again—and this time, marius finally sees vyn enjoying himself and having fun, the slight smile on his pale face a sight he'll never forget. vyn richter, a man too proper and elegant, dancing around a cheap, poorly-folded paper on a senior citizen's party after going through a very hassling transportation means with a real smile on his face?

i must be in a fucking fantasy world.

before the music comes to a halt, marius thinks to himself—that's right, my love. cut those binding ties and be free; let go of your burden and be happy, vyn. happiness suits you better.

the music stops, and vyn, with his arms still wrapped around marius's neck, leans closer and says, “marius, we do not—”

“you should smile more often,” marius interrupts, his eyes fixated on his one and only, his precious gem that is vyn. the music has halted and so did the world around them—in marius's eyes there was only him; the air he breathes, his heart that beats, all his senses were only filled with him. “i love it when you smile,” he tells vyn, “you're so fucking pretty when you smile.”

with yet another smirk, marius hooks his arms under vyn's waist and legs, effortlessly carrying him in a bridal position.

he knows he could only fit half of his foot on that folded paper, but right now, it doesn't matter to marius. his confidence is already enough for him to survive this diminished sheet of cheap paper—what more if he's further amplified by the thought of spending the night with his beloved, of snagging sweet victory and seeing vyn happy again?

all he could think of right now is winning. it's all he ever wanted this very moment—and what marius wants, marius gets.

(tho it was a really really really tricky challenge to sneak into vyn's heart; but look, didn't he succeed?)

and so marius stepped onto that folded paper—with vyn in his arms he could feel his heart in unsteady, violent beats; and in that moment, he knew he was going to win. he's going to win it for vyn. for both of them.

(also as revenge bc he lost to rosa and luke during the first game of longest happy birthday)

luke and rosa, on the other hand, do not know whether to feel surprised, happy, or annoyed. though they are definitely annoyed.

even if they win, everyone knows who the real winners are. gotta be them vyn and marius with their sweet couple shit going on.

“i already felt something going on between them, but i'm really annoyed right now.” luke unknowingly tightens his grip on rosa's thighs, who's on a piggyback ride on him. “hey watson, when are we going to win in life? all we get is stress and tons of them. like we have a supplier or some shit.”

“r-really... they're being lovey-dovey in front of us...” rosa feels a shadow cast over her face. so two of her crushes are in a relationship, after all. ah, how unlucky!

“luke, you know what?” she says, “i think i'm getting annoyed, too. aren't you going to ask me to be your girlfriend or something—ah!”

all flustered from rosa's advances (at least, that's what it seemed to luke), luke breaks from his balance and pulls rosa into the depths of defeat with him.

“watson!” he calls out to her, his features filled with worry. luke thoroughly checks her body for bruises or injuries, and was about to offer to carry her when rosa interrupts with a laugh.

“luke, aren't you all flustered? if only you could see your tomato face,” she giggles, making luke blush deeper red. luke struggles to find an answer, but thankfully, the host captures rosa's attention.

“and the winner is... vyn and marius! congratulations, sirs. please claim your prize at the...”

“i think both of them already got the prize they want,” says luke, smiling wide. i once thought these two won't see eye to eye—turns out there was more to it. “so, watson. you already made plans tonight?”

“yeah,” she replies, contemplating. “the plan is we're all switching rooms tonight.”

with one wink from rosa, luke already knew what she meant. operation switch rooms so vyn and marius could spend the night together.

(aka operation help their friends get laid)

luke nods. “aye aye, captain,” he says, before sparing the senior attorney a glance. “do you think we should plan something for artem too? apparently his 99.9% winrate doesn't apply on party games and he's depressed about it.”

“what do you mean?” asks rosa, his face innocent. “... you want artem to fuck his way out of a lost game of flicking lime?”

luke slaps his forehead too hard he could faint.

lalala, i am still deciding whether i'll push through with what i originally planned. there was supposed to be five games and im still missing “bring me” (filos, if puting buhok ang ipapabring me, we're winning pag kasama natin si vyn) and “spell it out” wherein players are going to spell words by moving their hips while holding a balloon between their thighs. i wonder how our elegant king vyn richter's gonna accomplish this shit.

also vyn is so pretty have ya'll seen his new xmas card? oh my god hes so shippable with literally everyone. goodbye rosa it was fun while it lasted, charot.

also #vynmarius. i am here to spread the doctrine of vynmarius. i am a vynmarius worshipper. in the name of vynmarius, i shall write more fics/shenanigans/hcs in the future.

[sero-para-el-pueblo]

Okay so, Sero Latino headcanons and just headcanons in general bc I love him and I’m procrastinating studying for my finals. I have also been thinking about all the difficulties that being a foreigner has with language and culture and staff. Also, imma project a little bit so bear with me

When Sero and his parents moved to Japan, Sero didn’t know Japanese he knew only the basics and bc of these he probably was really good at subjects that don’t have letters on them

Like, Sero it’s really good at math because numbers are numbers and he just had to follow the teaches method,

when class 1-a find out hes good at math they're like how are you so good and he's jsut like "bueno plebes, when you move across the world you have to find ways to remember yourself you're not dumb just don't know the language"

he’s probably also really good at sports and English

Although being in an environment where Japanese was all he hear helped Sero picked Japanese fairly easy he still had a period of time where he was failing most of his classes bc his Japanese wasn't the best

Even after like 5 years of being in Japan there are expression he doesn’t quite get or like Japanese pop culture or classics he doesn’t know and he feels alienated for not knowing them and the bakusquad try to make him feel better by explaining stuff to him

Okay but like imagine Bakugo aggressively making Sero feel better

“Listen soy face you were raised in another fucking culture it’s not your fucking fault you don’t know this shit, who the fuck even cares”

Speaking of Bakugo it’s his birthday today so imagine Sero barging into boom boom boys room at 6 in the morning singing las mañanitas

also Sero's mom made a 3 leches cake for Bakugo and he loved it

In Spanish word have a lot of different meaning like so in my Mexican mind the equivalent of saying “bet” when someone says something it’s “jaló” however it also means to pull

So imagine after Sero has taught some Spanish to class 1-a someone asks him to go somewhere and Sero it’s like jaló, and everyone it’s like the fuck?? So Sero has to explain Mexican slang to the class

A few hours later when Aizawa comes back he finds half of the class arguing about the correct way of using words like “pedo”, “madre”, “verga” and Midoriya it’s taking notes at light speed and the other half are trying to stop Bakugo from blowing Denki's face bc he keeps using the words wrong

Idk if it’s just my Mexican dad or all dad are like this but whenever something in the house needs fixing my dad would just make it worse or get mad at everybody bc he can’t fix it or take forever to even look at it

But imagine Sero's dad it’s like that so Sero's mom took it to herself to learn how to fix stuff around the house so Sero's got stuck helping his mom fix stuff so now he’s just really good at it

So now every time something needs fixing at the dorms Sero just fixes it

Imagine bakudeku knocking at Sero's door bc they were fighting and they accidentally broke the sink for the 4 time that month and they need to fix

“Sero we need help-” “safo Rey ” (I think this is the equivalent as touching your nose to signal your not gonna do it?? Idk) Sero ended up fixing it just before Aizawa was back

I just rewatch Coco so imagine class 1-a celebrating Día de Los Muertos (day of the dead) putting up the altar and all and Aizawa and All Might walk in when the class it's finishing up and Aizawa it's like 'Sero why are you putting flower petals in the floor?' and Sero it's like 'oh to guide the dead safely on their way back' "... okay that doesn't answer my question"

Aizawa and All Might end up watching Coco and at the end All Might ask the class if it's okay he wants to put a picture on the altar too

the next morning the altar has two new pictures, a lady with black hair and a smiley boy sitting on what seems a cloud, although the class wants to ask about the boy a look on Aizawa's face stops all questions.

I made myself cry with the last one my bad y'all

okay onto happier topics imagine that Spanish slang doesn't stop at the students but also reaches the teacher

imagine Present mic screaming "fierro" or "a huevo" it drives Aizawa crazy

Mexican people tend to be really religious and even tho Sero doesn't really believe in religion he does things like giving the bakusquad la bendicion every time any of them go out like it started after Kiri got hurt rescuing Eri so now Sero does it all the time

Bakugo acts as it bothers him but he would stay still in from of Sero and be like "what the fuck are waiting for do your stupid thing so I can go"

Sero also insist on giving la bendicion to Miroriya bc the lord knows the boy needs it, fuck it the rest of the class didn't want to be left out so they also demand to be given la bendicion

Also if you speak two languages you know you get a brand new personality when you swish language

Sero get more confident, cocky, and flirty when he speaks Spanish he would flirt with anyone specially Bakugou and Denki he would purposely role his “r” to mess with bakugou

[aizawa-needs-coffee]

Hi!! Could I have a matchup please? I'm 18, pronouns she/her, I'm fine w any gender though I have a preference for males

If its of any relevance, physically I'm about 5'8 tall and on the chubby side, green eyes, brown hair (with blonde streaks) and I wear glasses

If you're into astrology/ mbti, I am a Sagittarius w both moon and rising in Cancer and I'm INFP

So I'm quite emotional lol. Usually very in touch with my emotions and quite perceptive of other's feelings as well. I have a huge saviours complex especially when it comes to feelings (i love helping others figure out their feelings, being a shoulder to cry on or even offering comforting hugs) but I try my best to keep it control cause I don't wanna be suffocating

On the outside I'd say I'm fairly organized, I keep my room clean and all of that, I'm a lil bit of a perfectionist but mentally I'm all over the place. I tend to get carried away by thoughts and emotions and end up procrastinating a lot; anxiety makes it all worse. In short, I suck at time management

To most people I may seem quiet and reserved but I actually really enjoy talking to people; I'm really insecure about not being funny or interesting enough tho. Around my friends I'm more relaxed but still have moments of self doubt

I can also be quite obsessive. If something really catches my interest I won't stop until I search all there is to know about it. For example I watched bnha, read the manga, the spin offs etc all in less than a month and now I'm indulging in fanart and fanfics because I need m o r e c o n t e n t hsbsb. I'm also that kind of person that listens to a new song they like on repeat until they hate it. Speaking of music, I can't say I have a taste lol. My fave genres are rock, pop and indie but I hear smth I like, I listen to it, whether its "high quality" music, basic or weird. Lately I've been listening to a lot of epicore which is literally the type of music thats used in fantasy and sci fi movies askfkdk

I like expressing myself through writing, singing and dancing but I really can't say I'm talented at either of those, it's all in good fun. I also enjoy reading (fiction, non-fic books bore me like hell; my fave genres are fantasy, sci fi and crime) but I haaate literature in school. I'm actually a bit of a math nerd and this year I'm starting uni, studying computer science!! Oh! I've also taken drama classes for 2 years (despite the fear I loved being on stage and plan on starting again once I'm done w the baccalaureate), I love playing D&D and while I woulnd't quite call myself a gamer, I love role playing video games. I'm also almost always down for any kind of multiplayer video games w friends although I have no experience

I'm not a sportive person, I go on walks or do a few exercises every now and then at home but I'm willing to try stuff out like a new sport or going to the gym w an s/o. I do plan on starting self defense classes soon and maybe taking up sword fighting (I love swords hehe)

Tbh I've never been in a relationship so I'm not really sure how I would act w an s/o, nor what I'm exactly looking for. I best express my affection through physical touch tho and that includes my friends so I'd like someone who isn't bothered or can get used to that (s/o would still receive the most hugs/ cuddles etc). I'm not that comfortable w the other love languages for friends and family, but I think I'd be a lot more eager to express my love through them for s/o. If I'm on the receiving end, my weakness is still physical touch :)) but I also need words of affirmation every now and then cause insecurities 🌠 and while I wouldn't ask for anything, especially objects, I am a hoarder and I'd keep any kind of gift like its a national treasure simply bc its from someone I love.

In addition, it doesn't really matter if s/o is more on the emotional or rational side a long as they dont invalidate my feelings; it angers me a lot and makes me feel even more insecure. I tend to isolate when I'm really really upset about something so I need a lil bit of pushing to talk abt it; I'm open to talk abt my feelings but I need the verbal confirmation that they care and wanna help, its not just cause they're being nice

Wow that is a lot of rambling jeez ajsjsjs sorry. Thank you so much if you've read throught that all and ty for the match up!!

Me and my wife literally having a ten minute debate on who we’d pair you with before I made my choice. Thanks for all the details and I hope you enjoy the match up!

I match you with Sero

I feel he’s outgoing and extroverted enough to help you with your anxiety and always reassure you that you are good at things and he does love you, he’s also so chill and laid back that even if you were clingy he’d not mind, he’d embrace it, his chill nature would help balance you. He would help you feel grounded and have a ‘you don’t have to do it all now’ attitude but would happily help you out. You need help going to the store? He remembers the list you wrote, having trouble fitting in lunch while you study? He’ll come to your door with pizza.

He’s determined and outgoing but isn’t aggressively positive and loud either which I think is why I picked him over Kirishima for you.

+++

“Hey babe, whatcha reading?” Sero asked sitting next to you on the sofa, he handed you a soda which you gratefully took, not looking up from your laptop screen.

As soon as he was sat down comfortably your hand grabbed his, clasping your fingers together as you managed to tear your gaze away from the Wikipedia page which was still open. You blinked up at him and shook your head.

“Oh just something I learned about today and wanted to do some.. extra reading” you explained.

He nodded his head and drank his soda watching as your face lit up as you started to ramble about the topic, he didn’t really know much about it but the way you told him about everything, the way you happily expressed your interest towards the topic made him happy. He gave you his big grin when you finished.

“Sorry, I rambled..” You felt bad, you always felt nervous when you info dumped on people.

“Nah, it’s cool, I didn’t mind at all” he brought your hand up to his face and gave it a kiss, your face flushed at the gentle gesture which caused Sero to laugh playfully.

“Well, if your sure… I just wanted something to take my mind off chores”.

“It’s the weekend, you don’t have to rush anyway.. and if you don’t feel better by tomorrow I can help, you can wash the dishes and I’ll dry?” he suggested still peppering kisses on the back of your hand before you set your laptop down and crawled closer to him.

You nodded softly, that sounded a lot more manageable, you felt your anxiety settle down from a raging nagging feeling to something easier to tolerate. He was such a good influence on you. Sero set down his drink and wrapped his arm around you, pulling you closer to his chest.

“The guys want to come over and say hi later, maybe get pizza… but I can tell them not tonight if you aren’t feeling it… maybe you can play that new game you got? I liked watching you play the other night” He suggested as he nuzzled your head, enjoying how your hair felt on his face.

“Maybe… can I give you an answer later?”

“Yeah, no rush babe”

You smiled softly feeling the lanky boy kiss the side of your head and listened as you carried on talking about the trivia of your current interest.

[make-me-imagine]

congrats on 5.5k!! you're insanely talented and I'm so happy you're getting the recognition you deserve 🥺🥺 could i join in the ship requests too?

I'm a rather small sized (like, 154cm & ~40kg kind of small) Asian female from a South East Asia country and i prefer men, especially men who are taller and Age Gaps™ 🥴 I'm not sure how much you know about/believe in astrology but I'm a Libra sun, Taurus rising and Capricorn moon so you can do what you want with that 😂

I'm an INTP/INFP (I've gotten both an equal number of times from sites OTHER than 16 personality, tho I personally vibe with INTP just a teeny smidge more) if you do MBTI ✌🏼 I LOVE to read, especially fanfiction lmao, and i also write! I really love listening to music + watching shows/movies too! My favourite shows are all mystery/crime based LOL and I am working towards becoming a criminal psychologist/forensic pathologist/forensic scientist in future! (heavily inspired by Criminal Minds, Sherlock, Detective Conan and the like so 😂) I have a really vivid and good imagination please i can spend DAYS just daydreaming and imagining scenarios that I never finish writing about & generally this is how all my work is never finished loll

I'm the eldest sibling at home, and my parents haven't always been around so I've been rather used to stepping up and taking care of myself (+ my sibling, like helping them with homework and all). Some people say I'm a natural born leader? idk bc I often step up to be the leader in group work & I'll often be the one to initiate things & all. I'm a rather big procrastinator though LOLL so you'll often catch me rushing my assignments & final projects & rushing my revision for exams + finals like, 2 days before the actual exam 💀 which often leads to me becoming more stressed out & breaking down more often than i actually should so 🥲 I'm trying to quit this bad habit though

I love cuddles and hugs please I will KILL for cuddles and hugs from my back by a tall character pls it just feels so safe and comforting to be spooned too 🥺🥺 sometimes when I'm too absorbed in work or something (which happens too often for it to be healthy) I might just forget to eat/sleep entirely AND also my sleep routine isn't the best. like i will literally fall asleep at 9pm, wake up in the middle of the night on my own at like, 1am, then usually I'll be rushing homework at this time, then maybe sleep again for a short while from 4ish? till when i have to get up for school/work at 5:30/6am 💀 there's been days where i literally looked so sick from the lack of sleep where my tutor once stopped the class to ask me if I was okay and if i was going to faint LMAO 😔 i feel like I'm a night owl??? but then also i have no problem getting up super early in the morning so?? but i really feel most at home and really enjoy the 3am nights 😌

i am also the class clown lol but it's bc i just make sarcastic comments and all and my friends think they're funny???? but also i enjoy making people laugh bc sometimes i find it interesting to try and see what kind of things make my friends laugh so it's lowkey an experiment? or like something i want to achieve? at this point. I'm fluent in English and Chinese/Mandarin and I'm learning Italian so I roughly know some basics, and I really enjoyed History, which I took last year but dropped this year. (I'm taking English Literature with Biology + Chemistry this year and they're all great, except I'm literally dying from the workload aaahhh 💀)

I'm kinda clumsy and Not Good™ at most sports, maybe passably okay for badminton but I'm really not that athletic and really not very keen on exercising either 😔 I'm quite creative and good with public speaking/creative writing/impromptu performance/speech though I'd say! I'm also in my school's drama club 😎 though I'm more of a backstage lights & sounds kind of person. I'm right handed (with a really neat handwriting, as I've been told many, many, many times) and I wear thin frame spectacles which I sometimes will fall asleep in & I'm so clumsy/careless that I'm actually really afraid I'd break them (it's happened before 😭)

I'm a really good planner? like i can do up a great and detailed schedule/plan for revision and all but i will NOT stick to what i plan 😭😭 i love to snack!!!! on chips + gummies especially, and my diet is quite unhealthy lmao i literally don't eat vegetables At All™ & i don't really eat meat that much too?? lmaoo please i can go for days without having a single proper meal & just survive on snacking on potato chips + soft drinks 💀 i am a very picky eater though so really me not finding food i like/am able to stomach is also really kind of my fault 🤡

while i really vibe with and love the dark academia aesthetic, i also do video/MOBA games, like i play games like Mobile Legends & all. I'm someone who knows most, if not all the lastest trends (like tiktok, memes etc) but i won't actively participate in them? i just kind of like to know things, like Knowledge is Power you know (I'm a Slytherin, in case you're wondering, though I've gotten Ravenclaw so often it's a close tie sometimes)

okay i feel like that's enough details about me? feels like I've told you nothing that's useful oh well LOL... I'd really love a ship for Criminal Minds and Marvel? if that's possible please? in case you missed it, i prefer men! (I'm a questioning bi, with a strong preference for men) for the hc prompt "what you do on your first date" or maybe "how you met + first impressions"?

thank you so much for being so kind and willing to do this ship requests thing!! I'm sure you're spending TONS of time and effort on this and aahhh i feel bad for typing so long paragraphs now (as you may have noticed i have a tendency to ramble on if not stopped because i am just really Socially Awkward ™ sometimes 💀 and have really bad (social) anxiety too) and i really think you're super amazing for doing this??? I'm so sorry if this took up too much of your time aaahhhhh thank you so so so much 🥺😭😭 really the biggest of congratulations to you for your 5.5k??? you really do deserve every single follower & i am SO insanely happy for you 🤩❤️

- 🌙🏒 anon

Don’t worry, you definitely provided enough information lmao. 

And thank you for your kind words, I appreciate it. 

I hope you like the ships I made for you

They are under the cut: 

Criminal Minds: 

I ship you with Hotch. 

You get the age-gap here lol. He would be a bit hesitant due to the age gap at first, but he would get over it because he can not resist. He does not seem like the type of cuddles, and especially does not take part in PDA. But when you are alone he would love holding you and spooning, especially after a long day of work. Aaron would be attracted to your uniqueness as well as your intelligence and aesthetic, finding it to be very “you”. 

How you met + his first impressions: 

You met when you were transferred to the BAU as the new Forensic Pathologist.

Hotch thought you were very interesting when you first met and was definitely intrigued by you. 

He thought you fit in fairly well and would get along with the others (which you do). 

He appreciates a sarcastic sense of humor, so he would dig that as well.

Hotch could tell you had a form of anxiety and wold be patient around you when you first met so that you could open up to him at your own pace.

What you do on your first date:

He takes you to a hockey game. 

He is not the sportiest person but he has had an interest in hockey for a while, sometimes watching it on tv. 

When he learned that you liked it, he decided that this would be the perfect opportunity to invite you on a date as well as to see his first game. 

After the game, you walked around town for a bit, getting some late night food and talking or a long time. 

This allowed you to open up to him quite a bit and you grew more comfortable around him as well, which he is very happy about. 

Best Friend: 

Your best friend is JJ. She thinks you are really cool and unique and nice. She has the type of personality that is easy t get along with and open up too, so you bonded with her quicker than the others. I also feel like she is into hockey as well, so she appreciates your love for it as well. 

-

Marvel: 

I ship you with Sam. 

I think Sam is a good fit for you. He is into sports, and digs your aesthetic. He is easy to get along with and very funny. He thinks your line of work is very interesting and loves to listen to you talk about it. Sam also really enjoys crime shows ans thrillers so he is always excited to meet someone who enjoys them as well. 

How you met + his first impressions:

You met through Nat, who you had met through SHIELD years before. 

You happened to be at the compound with Nat when Sam was there and she introduced you. 

He immediately thought you were pretty and very interesting.

Sam could tell you were shy, but that did not stop him from flirting.

Though he also made some jokes and was easy going as to not scare you off. 

He made sure to ask Nat about you once you left and managed to convince her to give him your contact info. 

What you did on your first date: 

He took you to the movies first, to watch the most recent crime thriller that came out. 

After the movie you went to a nearby park and walked around, talking about the movie and other crime/horror related stuff. 

You got food at a food truck and sat by the fountain together. 

He was appalled when you told him that you didn’t eat that often (if came a part of your relationship later on that he would try to cook you meals that you’d like just so you WOULD EAT). 

You ended up spending hours together, and it felt like no time at all.

So you were definitely up for another date with him, which he of course asked you about.  

Best-Friend: 

Natasha. She was the first one you met, and slowly introduced you to the others. She thought you were really cool when you first met and was surprised at how well you go along. That is sometimes hard for her to do, so once you became friends she never took that for granted. She and Sam would gang up on you when you weren’t eating btw. 

xxaaron

[clumsyclifford]

hello my darling bella! i haven't send you an essay in a while so. hi 😌

firstly i have a book rec which i know doesn't make too much sense but just in case you find yourself needing a book i think you would really enjoy loveless and/or radio silence but alice oseman. both very much have a vibe of friendship is romance (or at least both are very focused on friendship) and that reminded me of you!

i also meant to ask if you watched falcon and the winter soldier yet? since all the eps are out?

have you ever listened to achilles come down? it's the current most likely candidate to become my most listened to song this year

how's the baseball season going? i only ever see bits of what you say in the club and it makes no sense to me so i thought i'd ask 🙈

ooh also i had a very interesting experience recently: was driving home and someone cut me off in a very shitty way and i honked at them. bc i am Me that was the first time in nearly 3 years of driving that i used the horn. so that was fun i'm very proud of it 😌

okii rambling time is over i love you!! -fiancee

hello my darling fiancee!!!

you know i have heard about alice oseman but i’ve never looked up these books. loveless really does look up my alley tbh i’m down to read that i love a friendship book esp if it’s also queer thank u for the rec

 ahahaah no i have not in fact watched it i have no excuse for why not. maybe later this week when i need a procrastination tactic i’ll put it on. i did finish watching new girl so now i have nothing to watch but then again i have been re-listening to the adventure zone which is Kind Of a thing, BUT that’s not a show i can watch so i am still seeking one of those. the only thing is tfatws is the kind of show i would have to like pay attention to and get invested in. usually i watch a sitcom so i can just like spend an easy ten or twenty minutes having a laugh. anyway point being i haven’t watched it, i know i should, i’ll get around to it eventually...probably

yeah i’ve heard it once or twice! it’s a good song idk it’s nothing special to me personally but i like it, i know a lot of people really like it, i know ainslee’s been listening to it a lot. very exciting for you though i love that for you it’s so nice finding a song like that

ahhh baseball season ! well. it is going. it is definitely going. at the current moment my team(s) are not uhhh. they aren’t THRIVING. nats played their (my) archnemesis team the ph*llies yesterday and the ph*llies won which was a real blow to my self-esteem but we’re playing them again today and i have all my fingers crossed i absolutely refuse to lose to that fucking blood traitor br*ce h*rper again i will rage. and today the mets beat the orioles SEVEN to one which is just tragic. to be fair though the orioles are not like a super good team and they’re also not My team the way the nats are but like, still a bummer, nobody wants to lose to the mets. bc like fuck the mets. real talk tho if the nats lose to the phillies again i will just die

hot damn!!!!!!! first time for everything!!!!! i love that for you lol i’ve used the horn a couple times it’s not my favorite but sometimes you just gotta. proud of you for sticking up for yourself and your car god i miss driving

thank u for the essay i have missed receiving them!!! love youuuu

[inyoursheets]

7 17 36!

7. what was your life like last year? 

(jason mendoza voice) well, my year started about a year ago. it was probably one of the most interesting years of my life so far? maybe the hardest, idk? a lot happened, i think i did a lot of Growing UpTM. i was very very busy at first with my research masters and a bunch of extracurricular bullshit and then something happened in my family that forced us all to spend more time together, which made me realize a lot of things about myself and my family, and then, after debating it for months, i moved to the uk -- which turned out to be a great decision. i had such a good time and it gave me a sense of perspective and space that i didn’t know i needed. and i dated for the first time in ever, which was also fun! am totally not yearning/wondering about what could have been! nope! haha! ha! ha

17. opinion on insecurities. 

insecurities are dumb and u shouldn’t have them. jk! false! it’s very normal to have insecurities! we are taught to be insecure about so many things in so many ways, to a point where it can feel unnatural to not be insecure about xyz thing! ppl will even attack you for not being insecure about certain things, probs bc it increases their own insecurity levels and/or threatens power hierarchies! many insecurities are connected to social axes such as race, class, gender, sexuality, size, dis/ability, religion -- and then you throw capitalism into the mix and now we’ve got a bunch of industries specifically designed to profit off of our insecurities! good times!

my conclusion, as a fat woman, is that people (and billion dollar industries such as the diet industry and the cosmetics industry) don’t actually want me to love my body, or myself. they don’t! they want me to be insecure and self-conscious and ashamed about my size, they want to to act out a specific role, that of the insecure fat girl, and inhabit and carry my body in specific ways, bc if i’m confident and don’t feel ashamed of my size, the world will crumble! if fat isn’t actually morally inferior/ugly/worthless/lazy/etc. then thin people would have to face the reality that all the time and energy they put in trying not to look like me is for nought! there’s lots more here to unpack and i feel like im not wording these things right and all of these things are so complicated and cannot be divorced from other issues such as racism and sexism and capitalism, but here’s a start.

my point is -- insecurities suck, they’re usually based on lies people and, more importantly, institutions and industries try to sell you, and i wish for everybody that they will one day know what it feels like to no longer have those insecurities -- and it’s completely normal to have them. there is no shame in having insecurities! it’s very hard to not buy into them. you have to put in so much conscious effort and energy into ridding yourself of insecurities that you’ve had for a lifetime -- and even then, it’s not a static thing. it’s not just a question of simply ‘changing your mind’ when the majority of society disagrees with you, when they don’t want you to gain confidence. some days im like: fuck fatphobia! im hot as fuck! also my worth is not defined by my looks so it doesn’t even matter! and then two hours later i’ll go outside and get fatcalled, or catcalled, or i’ll see my body in the reflection of a window, and suddenly my whole resolve crumbles, even tho i know on an intellectual level that it’s not true, the lie that i’m about to give into. it’s not easy. it’s not a matter of flicking a switch, even tho i sincerely wish it was. something that does help, or at least it did for me, is learning how those bigger systems, such as fatphobia, racism, colorism, misogyny, transphobia, are at work. this helps to see that it is not you, individually, who is lacking something or doing something wrong. there are entire institutions and industries who contribute to you feeling this way -- and profit off it (wow look at me, writing my thesis one tumblr ask at a time!)

37. favourite actor/actress 

oh!!!!! viola davis! sandra oh bc she carried grey’s anatomy, no questions at this time ty! christine baranski bc mamma mia! the good wife! a bad moms christmas!!!!! i desperately want her in more comedies! kathryn hahn, who, i kid you not, is always the funniest person in a movie, no matter how small her role is! also, melissa mccarthy, kate mckinnon, retta, and of course, the only man worthy of mention, manny montana. i watch in amazement how he portrays rio. this man.......amazing.

36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill? 

......................ok so i just realized you asked 36 instead of 37, damn it! im not even gonna delete that, they’re all too amazing for me to do that, soz. as for the dreams -- loving myself! writing a book (or, finishing a story that could be a book)! sucking it up and getting the bisexual nose piercing like i know i want to!

thank youuuuuuuu!!!! nice asks to help me procrastinate <3

[buzzliker]

WOOO IT'S ANOTHER ONE OF THESE!!!!!

this time i really wanted to explain my decisions for the headcannons i've made here, so without further ado; 3, 2, 1, PRIDEYEAR!!

first of all, i hc them both to be Not Completely Cis because as an enby myself it's just. comforting and nice!! plus i think they really fit them imo!! also they're bi and everyone knows it at this point

 doesn't use pet names/loves pet names

we all know buzz. he is awkward as heck and can't form a sentence around any of his love interests he's also shorter than all of them which is adorable. therefore, i think buzz is more likely to skip out on the pet names. woody i think also isn't crazy about them, but if he's ever feeling super-duper affectionate i can totally seem him slipping in a "honey" or "babe" instead of just calling his bf by his name.

 confesses first/waits to be confessed to first

i actually touch upon this a little in my currently-in-the-works prideyear fic, but despite this i actually find this one kind of difficult to explain. i think the progression of their relationship, both canonically in the films as well as romantically if you view them that way is pretty all-over-the-place, but ultimately beautiful. i think that they both have doubts about how the other feels about them, whether they seem them as just a friend or more than that, and so on. that doesn't stop them from getting huge silly crushes on each other, though. to put a long (toy) story short, i'd like to think that woody had a sort of love-at-first-sight moment when he first saw buzz standing on andy's bed back in 1995, and by getting to know him afterwards his inner morosexual was Awakened. buzz had his own Awakening when he held woody as they flew together, like wow this cowboy is CUTE, and those feelings he had developed while he was away from and trying to rescue woody in ts2.absence makes the heart grow fonder (i was just listening to this song as i wrote this so here go stream all of pogo's music). across the next few movies they fall harder for each other, but they get increasingly more worried about what others, and each other will think. it will definitely end in them awkwardly and emotionally confessing around the same time, the details of which i'm going to write/cover in the fic once i stop procrastinating and finish it ;'D

 big spoon/little spoon

Y'all Can Fight Me On This. i'm sorry fdjfhgdg it's just perfect ok???? look into mr lightyear's beautiful blue painted eyes and tell me he does not radiate Extreme Big Spoon Energy and vice-versa for mr pride that is all

 gives gifts/does favours

idk man i just feel like buzz is actually quite intuitive to his friends' interests and would be the kind to get them really nice and meaningful gifts!! woody always goes red and/or just Sobs whenever buzz springs a surprise gift on him like i can totally see him jumping out of the window of andy/bonnie's room to get woody that flower from across the road that says something Extraordinarily Mushy in flower language. on the other hand, i just see woody as more of a favour doer in general, but his actions are always sincere, as he loves to helps others, whether they be toys or kids in need.

 likes formal dates/likes casual hang-out dates

buzz is super uncomfy with anything too formal unless it's to do with star command, so like,,,,,, he'd 100% definitely be for a casual date, especially with woody. unless he's in spanish mode, in which case we'd probably get the full candlelit dinner with a mariachi band that's actually just mr pricklepants and the aliens singing really offkey over bonnie's radio. woody also, he's the king of movie nights and other soft casual dates, he just always seems to have the perfect idea of where to go and what to do! prideyear just have soft domestic gay energy in this essay i will

 introverted/extroverted

woody to me, is definitely an extrovert, a good leader, and fairly outgoing. he gets exhausted at times and needs his alone time for sure, but he feels at his happiest when with his loved ones and making them happy because he is a wholesome man! he's also just very tactful and good with words, and loves to be surrounded by others, even if it takes him a while to understand the true meaning of the bonds he has with the other toys as well as just andy. they're a family, after all ;; i think buzz is an ambivert or maybe even an introvert though, as he's much more socially awkward, and to me he seems like more of the type to lose himself in thought and dissociate more often, perhaps over silly things. still, he's absolutely a leader in his own right though, but as we've seen he prefers to be second-in-command to woody more often, but will step up to first position if needed. that's probably also why he gave jessie the leadership role at the end of toy story 4 instead of buzz bc he understood buzz's needs HH this is literally just me, the textbook example of an introvert, indulging in comfort headcannons now so let's keep going!

 affectionate via actions/affectionate via words

 buzz turns into a flustered, stuttering mess around his love interests, while woody is certainly more of a smooth talker. also, you can't tell me that when buzz gets closer to people, he doesn't give REALLY lovely soft gentle hugs. both woody's words of wisdom/affection/praise and buzz's small gestures of affection are just as soft and warm and appreciated by the other as each other!!! it's nice to have the best of both worlds :)

 carefreree/serious

 it really depends on the situation?? like they both have the capacity to be strong and serious leaders or complete and utter GOOFBALLS but i guess if you're looking at their personalities as a whole they're mostly serious?? unless spanish mode again fjdgfghf

 affectionate when alone/pda central baby

 woody tends to be more private about his affection, and plus his being more of a verbal guy means he's just generally hopeless at pda. he's trying tho. buzz on the other hand, and speaking of hand he will hold woody's forever, is just always touching woody like?? it's literally canon too?? buzz is just like :) that;s my bf right there and he mine and woody is like.*infinity of blushy emojis* i love them so so much

 slow burn/love at first sight

 LITERALLY NOBODY CAN DISAGREE WITH ME HERE like i mentioned earlier you just can't tell me that woody didn't fall head over snake-filled boots for buzz the MOMENT he saw him standing there on andy's bed. you just can't. again, like i mentioned earlier, it takes slightly longer for buzz's feelings to truly emerge bc he is awkward and i love him

 straightforward texts/emoji spam and keyboard smashing

 i think they're both pretty straightforward when it comes to texting tbh. though they both can't resist the odd heart/star emoji, and once jessie taught woody how to keysmash and buzz thought he had been possessed

 lends hoodies & clothes/borrows hoodies & clothes

 picture woody snuggling into one of buzz's baggy green hoodies that's like a million sizes too big for him but so. so Comfy and reminds him of his wonderful bf so what's not to lose?? buzz doesn't mind his clothes going mysteriously missing, because he usually finds them again finds them again on a peacefully sleeping woody later and then they CUDDLE god i love them

 that's it!!! thank you so much for reading this far about my Prideyear Feelings haha, i have about 7 million fic ideas after writing this but gottta finish my first prideyear fic before that haha ':)

gay rights!

[tempestshakes01]

06-21-20

aw, ok,

I was thinking more about my last days in Sp/okane (full post about that another day!) when I remembered that ~literally~ the day before I left to Seattle to pick up my parents I met the CUTEST guy at my favorite thrift shop. 

Yes, so I went to the shop to drop off a bunch of clothes and the few larger items I could carry by myself (the rest my dad was going to help me drop off when we drove back from the western half of the state). Me being Mira, this meant I could not resist going inside and...go shopping for more clothes. I needed jeans! Sp/okane thrift spots have the best selection of good quality jeans at a steal. 

Anyway, it was Saturday--I think...because it was very busy and the line at the fitting booths was super long which only happened on Saturdays when they had their sales. ANYWAY, who cares, the line was long. I had my lil cart filled to brim knowing I’d be taking a while because you can only take 6 items in at a time. One lady in front of me was sighing all loud and making noise about how many people were around. The next lady in front of me also had a massive haul and then her daughter came and joined her with another big cart, but I didn’t mind because I was doing last-minute emails on my phone for STEM camps (parents got links to our class videos...after 3 years I really got that shit down...my camp was so funnnnnn). 

Then an older man comes up with three work shirts. I’m supposed to be next in line but I know that 3 out of the 4 booths are being used by the ladies with lots of stuff to try on and I have a lot too, so I let him go in front of me. He’s so sweet and like, “Are you sure? Are you sure? I just don’t know which blue will look best so my wife told me to try them on.” And we chatted amiably before a booth opened up. 

OKAY, so I don’t know why I’m telling this story with so MUCH unnecessary detail, lol, I think I’m procrastinating the rest of my day, but--

A guy who I originally thought was a shopper came over and turns out he was an employee. He helped out one of the rude ladies (the mom) and then started organizing the area right by the dressing booths. And like, I was trying not to really look at or chat with people becauseeeeee this was still at that time when my voice was almost completely blown out. Like, I remember this afternoon cause later I went climbing with J and N, and I sounded like a witch. And my allergies were so-so, and I had hives still, and I wasn’t wearing any make-up, and my hair was quite messy, and I just remember thinking I looked like shit, sounded like shit, but I was overall in a super good mood, lol. (again, more about my last days in Spokane in another post)

So when I let the older man ahead of me, and he went into the booth, the worker guy [let’s call him...Caleb. I don’t know his name, but he looked like a Caleb], surprises me by saying, “wow, that was really nice of you”.

(also because i had forgotten he was there and he was literally like a foot away from me at the clothes hanger you put go-backs on so he leaned over and i was like oh yeah this cute guy)

AND OKAY, you’re like, Miranda, that’s so dumb that you carry that moment with you for a year, but lemme just clarify...it’s the way he said. He was so...ugh, hot, and it made me feel so good at the time because he said it like he was kinda surprised someone was nice (hahaha), but also very warmly. It made me glow. I don’t know how to explain it. This is so dumb now that I’m typing it out, but I didn’t even blush at the time!!! Me!!! I didn’t blush!!! I simply felt like,,,wow,,,,thank you hot guy for being so nice. Oh, that’s it!!! The way he said it felt kind. In this weird way. Like, I suddenly knew that he was a very kind person. vIBES, ya know. 

So nothing more of interest happened because as soon as I basked in the glow of his warmth and kindness and hotness, and said, “thanks” in my scratchy as hell voice...I remembered I am me (acne scars (my skin was going thru a time probably bc of how much weed I was smoking lol), hives, messy hair, witch-voiced) and that right now was not the best time to be talking to such a sweetheart, so I smiled and pretended to finish my emails for another 5 minutes when a door opened up and it was my turn. 

It was the booth nearest the go-backs so I tucked my lil cart behind it and Caleb (lol I forgot I named him) said he’d watch my stuff. And so I tried on all my stuff. Took like 15-20~ mins cause again! Big haul! Cute jeans! A sports bra! Dresses! 

After figuring out when I wanted, I started to roll my lil cart to the only register open, when Caleb hopped over from the go-backs and said he could ring me up, but I dunno what I was thinking (that I didn’t want to be rung-up by the hot guy...let that other girl go.....she was already making her way toward him) and I ignored him (lol), but he said “hey, i’m open” from behind the register and not noticing the other girl making a b-line toward him, we made eye contact and he was like, “I got you!” and waved me over so I no choice but sheepishly tug my lil cart to his register where the afternoon light was streaming in behind him making his blonde hair glow and his clear blue eyes shine brighter (lMAO i’m totally making that up...I don’t remember if his eyes with blue but I remember they were so warm and pretty so let’s go with blue).

So he starts to make conversation and I chat with him even tho I sound like I’m parched and 100 years old, and he’s super friendly and we are VIBING. We’ve got that flirty thing and he’s got tattoos and his haircut is obviously from a barber and sharp and he’s very upbeat in a natural way.........and i just like him. immediately. So we’re talking and he asks me what college I go to...........lol.......and I say that I’m out of college. He says, oh, when did you graduate.....and I literally had to pause and mentally calculate and I even made a joke about how I’m so old I have to think about it......and he asks me how old I am and I say that I turned 25 in May. And he gets quiet for a second, tells me I don’t look 25 and I say that’s what all the kids say cause i work with kids lollllll, he shrugs, and then starts our convo with the same energy it started with but THEN I tell him about my car getting hit and he.........tells me how to fix it or something........my taillight........and says he’s gonna start school for autoworkers and become a mechanic (hot) and his dream is to own his own shop, and I’m like, that’s so cool, yada yadda, and THEN he says, yeah, he got into a great program after graduation..............and I pause, because graduation. And I go, “Cool, what college did you graduate from” because I’m dumb and I wanted him to have just graduated from college, but no he goes, “Uh, high school. I went to [redacted]................[big pause]............I’m 18.” And I go, “OH.”

And I don’t think it registered to him that I was like, not gonna flirt with him now that I knew he was a 😭 child, until I said that hard “oh”, lollllll, but again he kinda paused and rolled with it saying he was gonna give me the “college girl” discount and it’d be between us, no worries, and I was like “oh thank you sweet young man” (not really im not that much of a nerd but i was getting that sort of sentiment across) and he was getting it at this point, so he kinda sheepishly said, “I’ll see you around?” 

but no, I was gonna move the next day, but I said yes and walked out shaken at how we were totally vibing and I started crushing on him cause he was so hot and so nice and the sun was shining behind him in a halo and I looked like crap but he was still flirting and then he had to be 18. lmao. 

so sad. 

[myhalloweendreams]

Oh boy! I'm so not prepared to be a responsible adult T-T

Example A:

I got home like 8pm from work.

In fact I knew I had to:

1. Shower

2. Empty my cats litter box (it was well due the time to do so... I'm a bad cat mom T-T )

3. Take care of my plants that would possible die bc I was postponing it for like a week even tho I did bought the necessary things that I needed (they're succulents so not watering them for a week is okay. Letting some of them waiting to be planted again after I had to get them out of their original pot bc of a infestation in several pots... They were just on the table no pots for a week, not so okay)

4. Eat

5. Sleep early bc I work tomorrow early

Not in any specific order...

So I went to eat and then to read bc I NEEDED to finish the book I was reading.

I thought I had like 70 pages to go and I checked and it was in fact 162 pages for the book end... So I went ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Bc u know I'm sane and responsible.

I finished the book.

Then I spent 40 minutes procrastinating in the bathroom before I showered.

I showered

I was like is lateee I should do it tomorrow (about the litter box)

Then I remembered I said the same thing yesterday and went to wash the litter box instead of just changing it's sand

Then since I was doing it anyway I just went well I will just play around with my plants while I let it dry a little... I don't have to finish I can just take care of the ones that aren't in any pot

So story short... I went out of that room 2 fucking hours later

Covered in dirty (as u remember I had already showered just before)

Now it is REALLY LATE and I have like 5 hours to sleep and I want to just sit and cry bc of it

I don't know why I fucking hyperfocus in shit and don't see time passing or why I HAVE TO do things like it's a freaking necessity like with the book, I knew I had other things to do but I couldn't stop myself of just finishing it before I could do anything else or why I can't just focus in what have to be done and just do it like a normal person.

I'm a freaking mess and I'm not happy about it.

[kewltie]

Somehow, in the last couple of weeks I got a slew of new people coming to my blog and hit 1k followers（○□○）. I’m beyond shocked. Like, I’m pretty sure 90% of you are bots or inactives but to those that are breathing: hello, and thanks for sticking with me! I’m stoke and humbled by your presence especially those that been with me for so long now. I may not know you personally but you know me. Maybe not very well since I’m intensely private and all I do is ramble about my accursed writing habits lmao but!!!! You’re here anyway despite everything and I’m very grateful for your constant support. 

So to welcome to new people and because I don’t I ever did any introduction post before. 

Hello, I’m kewltie. QT. Trina. That girl who keep starting shit and never finishing it a;sjdf;alsjdf;alsjdfa. I’M TRYING. Anyway, here are a few notable things about me and this blog in case you wanna make sure this is someone you wanna, ya know, stick around: 

this is my writing blog. so all you’ll see are huge block of texts from either teasers of stuff im currently working or random pieces that im in the mood for but mostly it’s just me complaining about writing sobs. 

i’m in my mid 20s and have been in fandom since i was like preteen. LJ-era, so yea im a fandom oldie. over a decade of experience here. 

since i have been through several fandom purges bc of ya know censored ship ://///  im very much YKINMK aka Your Kink Is Not My Kink but your kink is okay!!! i dont care for your problematic kinks or ships bc i have my own so yea im cool with you if you are cool with me. 

i live in socal so i come off as US-centric sometimes but im vietnamese. 

bnha is the fandom im writing and most active in but im in like a gazillion fandom. a hyperbole but kinda true?? supernatural, hannibal, voltron, harry potter, 1D, kpop, marvel, sherlock, etc. but you won’t see any of those fandom post here since i only write for ONE fandom at a time bc i cant focus on anything else /o\ lol. 

i swear a lot. like, A LOT. regularly, religiously like every twenty words out of my mouth is a fuck you. it doesn’t mean anything honestly. i just do it when im being overly emotional so when im exicited, upset, sad, etc. 

im overly emotional and sensitive w/ a truck load of anxiety and crippling self esteem.... so i dont do well interacting w/ people. mostly. i try tho!!!!! i mainly just keep to myself and stay in my corner of the fandom. i dont care for fandom drama or anything like that. i just want to read and write in peace. kthx. 

when i make a post on here it’ll mostly be in lowercase, mostly in caps, abuse the word like, and use a lot of exclamation point like 90% of the time. 

i identified as queer. and maybe demisexual/grey-ace??? idk sexuality is confusing and im still figuring it all out but i know at least im comfortable with the label queer. 

i dont write smut for personal reason. maybe one day in the future but its’ not for me right now. dont have a problem reading it but writing is impossible for me. 

i dabbled in all genres. i dont really have a specific genre/niceh i personally enjoy more than the rest or specialized in. i love fantasy, scifi, horror, romance, kinks etc etc. so you’ll find me producing just about anything. you may get trash rom com one day, epic space opera the next, fantastical tales of gods and magic after that, some dark twisted shit later, and anything really when the mood strike me. 

i write for MYSELF. everything i ever produce is bc i wanted it so i did it. so if a fic idea is terrible is only bc I HAVE TERRIBLE TASTES. 

im a very whimsical writer. i write demanding largely on my mood and whatever strike my fancy so it’s all RANDOM which also mean i procrastinate and have a long list of WIPs. i never run out of ideas so that’s the big problem sobs. 

im a voracious reader. if i have to chose b/t writing or reading, it would be reading EVERYTIME YOU ASK ME. i have a semi-secret ao3 reading account with 1k+ bookmarks across various fandoms. it’s my pride and joy!!!!!!!!!!! i love reading fanfic so much T_____T. 

i am a media junkie. i love reading comics (manhwa, manga, webtoons, manhua, etc), watch kdrama/cdramas, love nature/space docu series, tv-shows, etc etc so that leak a lot into my writing. whatever im reading/watching can have influence my reading like wanting to write a gazillion palace aus bc i can’t stop burning through chinese palace/harem dramas. 

i may not be good w/ people but i hope i come off as easy and chill bc i really am!!!! honestly im more afraid of you than you are of me so uh, hi and you’re rad and thanks so much for following me even though i dont think im worth your time lmao /o\. I DONT WANT TO DISAPPOINT YOU BUT I KNOW I WILL. uh, like i said paper thin self esteem.

[forreasonswretchedandivine]

Tagged by: @kimchi-fried-ice (feel free to say hi whenever! I LOVE your blog, and you seem very nice I’d love to be friends!:))

Nickname: it’s practically my actual name, but it’s tidge. When I was little my basketball coach would always say my name as tish lol. Then my family started calling me that because they thought it was hilarious, and my mom said it in front of my theatre friends and they started doing it too. It’s honestly grown on me, and I let just about everyone call me tidge BC it usually leads to me telling them where it came from. Also I think it’s cute:):)

Height: 5’5?? 5’6? People always say I should know this but I just never do🤷🏾‍♀️🤷🏾‍♀️.(side note: if you’re taller than me and also a girl who likes girls HMU😚)

Hogwarts house: I’m like the only one of every person I know who’s consumed 4 Harry Potter things( read first book, watched first 3 movies) but I took a quiz and got slytherin? Sounds about right from what I know lol. I’m nice, but I’ve got major RBF and I’m ALWAYS down for a little drama

Last thing I googled: “where to catch dreepy in Pokémon sword” that elusive motherfucker has a 2% chance of spawning in the wild area and I almost exploded after 2 hours of running in and out of like 3 different tall grass areas. Didn’t find one BUT I found it’s evolved form, which was fine because looking any longer may have killed me

Song stuck in my head: From Eden by Hozier and high five by Sigrid. They are both bangers in their own respect, and the are playing ln my head at the same time right now. It’s kinda nice!

Following:253! Though a few of those are inactive now, I’ve had this account since middle school

Followers: 27 total but 10 are inactive, and I’m pretty sure one is just a spam account that was VERY convincing

Amount of sleep I get: I try for 7-8 and get it most of the time, but some nights I get hit with that good self hate™️™️ and stay up later because why not? Or I’ll be up till 3 in fugue state trying to finish homework/ projects that I procrastinated on lol. I take lots of naps too BC they are soooo great

Lucky number:13! I have no basis behind this, other than because I want it to be, and because people say it’s bad luck. So far it’s been pretty great to me!!

Dream job: 😬😬😬 welll over the past 2 years, especially since I transferred colleges and had a bit of an unexpected major chance( technical theatre> studio art) My career path has been pretty unclear and I’m still not really sure what I wanna do. I’d love to get back into something theatre related because I’m pretty good at it, but lately the art I’ve been doing makes me very happy and gives me a personal sense of accomplishment that theatre never gave me. I’m hoping to find some sort of intersection between the two, so I can be able to make something for either a play or musical, then when I’m done just go chill somewhere for a little while and take a nap. Or like make some cool painting or drawing, make some money from it, then take a few weeks off of doing sutff, repeat. So I guess the short answer is: make art that I enjoy, get paid, not work every day:)

Wearing: what am I wearing?My, my, how sexual!! Just kidding;);). Black boots, high waisted skinny jeans, an button up shirt with a stranger things demegoron pattern, tan cardigan, and a little trans pride pendant I made to remind myself I am valid, and to signal other trans people!

Favorite song: (TAZ balance spoilers) idk if this counts but any version of lucetia’s theme from taz, written by one GRIFFIN TEAR MY HEART OUT ANDREW MCELROY. It’s just so beautiful, and it always makes me feel such strong emotions because every time it plays on the podcast there’s like a major plot development or moment of growth for lucetia, and I JUST. I literally ascend when it plays during the finale when she’s about to stop the hunger, just ugh so good

Instruments: I played the baritone for like a year in middle school. To summarize how that went: I was not very good:/:/

Random fact: I’m always telling myself that this probably isn’t something I should be so casual and open about, but then I tell people anyways. When I was 3-4, my sister was getting on my nerves and we were both on the kitchen counter for some reason. So to get her to stop, I took a knife and cut almost completely through her finger. Needless to say that got me in a bit of trouble with my dad, and to this day most of my family gets on edge when they see me with a knife. Which I find funny because In my teen years and now, I’ve gotten really into buying knifes and swords like some sort of blade gremlin. All of that probably made me sound very unstable, but I promise I’m not, just like sharp things. Im like 30% unhinged at all times AT MOST.

Aesthetics:????? I’m really into symmetry and matching colors of that counts as an aesthetic. My room is probably the best example, because everything in it is organized in a weird messy kinda way. I know where it is but it’s not where you’d think(ex: The sword I have hung next to my window) again I am very much a gremlin girl, and while I keep a lot of weird stuff, Im also very organized and creative so I end up using some broken things to make something new(ex: the bow and arrow I made out of a walking stick, some rubber bands and a 5 mechanical pencils). This description is probably also a good example of my aesthetic, which is to say messy, and slightly incoherent, but prepared and practical. In terms of clothing, it’s a sliding scale between “ For all intents and purposes I was not planning on leaving my room or being perceived physically by others today, but a friend wanted to hang out, and I love my friends so here I am looking like this” And “ I am an ethereal being of pure beauty and elegance, but watered down a bit so I’m still very well dressed, but minus the elegance, and plus a lil slut and probably some black boots”. It should also be stated that my gayness is part of both of these in varying degrees of intensity

I tag: @rosebudyke @negative-ghostriderr @sunshine-nb @severedned @seraphlesbian (y’all don’t have to if you don’t want to tho,but if you want message me! You all also seem very nice☺️)