#late night nostalgia time

[hoothootmotherf-ckers]

obviously there's not an easy way to do this with like capitalism and bigotry and such, but I wish everyone in the US had the option for a sort of home-country study abroad situation, just the ability to spend a couple years living in different areas and different states and seeing what it's like out there

because like I grew up in California suburbs and didn't really spend much time anywhere else until I graduated college. And I love where I grew up, but I was really lacking a lot of perspective and context and understanding of the rest of the country. california has a hell of a superiority complex and there honestly wasn't a lot of a push to go or learn about or empathize with anyone else.

and then in the last two years, moving around for my job, I've lived in the rural southwest, in east coast suburbs, in the urban south. I've gotten crash courses in politics, in cultures, in history, and just how life is lived that I never would have seen in my hometown. I've met so many people, been a part of so many different communities.

I've met the kindest and most genuine people from brash and loud east coast cultures. I've found the most welcoming queer community I've ever been a part of in the south. I've worked with folks in the desert who live totally off the grid, who have to drive into town for water and can only get the news from their radio. I've also worked in urban sprawls with coworkers who've experienced homelessness in a big city.

and the people I meet and work with bring their learned experiences as well! I went to a potluck of midwestern delicacies thousands of miles from their origins, I've been lectured on grassroots politics in Florida by an enthusiastic intern on the east coast, I've been regaled with stories from a coworker who's lived in thirteen states in the last fifteen years. and I've learned so much.

I don't know where I'm going with this. Tomorrow I hit the road again, moving to my fifth state in the last two years, and I'm feeling nostalgic and also hopeful for the future. I guess I'm hoping that I never lose this feeling, this awe and respect for what I am experiencing and who I have the chance to learn from. And I really, really hope that other people have the chance to learn like this too.

[2000s-angell]

Cc: to the owner

[m-eltdown]

late nights make me miss people i should never want to see again

[cannondiesel00]

This was how the bot was moving on the day I went, back on 6/1/24, (I'm like very short so I tried to get it into view as best as I could)

-----------------------------------

I wish they kept these late night studio C's with all the lights and aspects of it programmed, because old footage looks really cool and mesmerizing with it all together

Anyways meow meow yall ໒꒰ྀིっ˕ -｡꒱ྀི১

[5eraphim]

i love emesis blue so much, but i know there's an alt universe out there where, instead of a fully animated fanfilm, it was posted back in 2013 as a grimdark multi-chapter fanfic on like, deviantart or fanfiction.net or smthn and i just know it would've been pulling so hard back then.....

[wordsunforgotten]

Grieving what never came to be

Of all the many words that I would have said, in  a time when I was not so weary and full of uncertainty, in a time where we may have been kinder, closer, more loving, if not for what fate has chosen for us, these words are the most important left:

I'm sorry we were not closer.

I'm sorry that our own sadness and selfishness and fear led us into challenges we had to face alone instead of together. In another, better world, things could have been different.

We would have stayed up late, playing games and laughing.

We would have baked bread together.

We would have made inside jokes.

We would have given each other silly nicknames.

Our mistakes and anger would've been forgiven.

We would have loved each other.

I'm sorry that this was never our truth. I'm sorry that it's not true now. I'm sorry if it never becomes true.

I hope you know that now, even when I peel an orange, or watch a funny movie, or see a pretty sunset, if I pause for too long, I can feel your absence there, for something that should have been and is not.

3:45 AM

[do-u-really-wanna-know]

[m-ilys-grave]

I'll always feel like the villain when I don't let old friendships that were horrible for me rekindle.

I'll always feel horrible for leaving their messages on delivered & their texts unanswered.

Yet I'll always remember how unhealthy that relationship was for me.

Sometimes late at night I'll remember our laughs & inside jokes, & all the random games we'd come up with to keep our minds away from boredom.

They will always & forever be the first person that pops into my mind when any one of the countless songs they introduced me to comes up on shuffle.

But I'll always remember that I wasn't "a good enough friend" when I couldn't drop everything during my mom's chemo to help them win back an ex. I wasn't "a good enough friend" any of the times I'd stay up with them all night on the phone, because they needed someone to be there in person.

I'll always remember being told I wasn't "a good enough friend" while also being told I was their best & only friend.

I'll always remember being so confused, & constantly questioning what I could do better in our friendship. I'll also remember them never showing guilt or regret after hurting me.

I won't answer their messages, because I'll always remember the pressure & loneliness that's comes along with them.

...no matter how much I miss the fun times.

[de3d2me]

lot lizard

[wellfell]

i've been thinking about this quote a lot lately ; it's the last day of somebody's childhood .

[celluzu]

Captain Puffy and Badboyhalo will always mean the world to me. I miss them.

[noctuary-of-one]

29.03.23

The present is a cemetery for the past and I linger like a phantom. I lowered old histories to rest, shortly before I unburied them. I lie in familiar coffins, ask ghosts what they'd be feeling if it were me instead of them. This moment is weathered like old pages, my fingers decayed right down to the bone. So long as I hold the shovel, the present is an eternal act of necromancy.

-one

[m-eltdown]

being nostalgic for a certain time or place and knowing full well that you can never go back and experience any of it again no matter how much you might want to feels like a punch in the chest every time

[fagdykevash]

ik i go thru this dilemma every other week but consider: i have negative object permanence also who care. anyway

[quartzitess]

Come along with me, to a cliff under a tree

[yzzart]

౨ৎ⊹. BOYFRIEND!KENJI HEADCANONS!

── content warnings: F!reader, mention of Emiko, Emi and Mina, Ultraman form, Kenji being a little needy (once again), fluff, a little something to warm our hearts and minds so dreamy.

── word count: 683!

⭑.ᐟ Underneath, and sometimes over, tight-fitting t-shirts and extremely expensive fabrics, wear a necklace; however, there is something special there. — His promise ring hangs on the gold chain; like a talisman, something that surrounds he with luck and passion. — Staying attached and close to you, even with a small object.

⤷ If he needs to think or try to decide something dramatically important and you're not around, Sato will take his fingers to the necklace and hold the ring; looking for guidance. — Oh, and waking up, before him, and contemplating that shiny and significant piece, which rests on his broad chest, is angelic.

⭑.ᐟ It's not uncommon to feel, in the middle of the night, Kenji's face trying, persistently, on your neck; readily, wanting to harness the huge and strong body between your. — He doesn't care about the grotesque difference in size, just at that moment, and he doesn't give up.

“Kenji, be careful…!” — Your voice, fully, drunk with sleep and maintaining stillness, murmured between the boy's black and shiny locks; who only responded with a snore, more like a purr and clinging even tighter to you.

⭑.ᐟ Sato can't keep his hands off you, no matter what's going on, what you're doing or what simple task you're performing; hands on your waist, kisses on every exposed and revealed part of your body, thin and wide fingers catching on some part of your clothes. — Don't be upset with him, this poor man is in love with you.

⤷ One day, Mina compared him to a sloth and obviously got a frown of disapproval and the adorable Emi observes how her “father” remains so attached to her “mother”. — Even laughing and grunting when he saw a completely sleepy and desperate Ken crawling towards you.

⭑.ᐟ Please, we have, we need to talk about all the times Kenji and Emi train together, most of the time, being just leisure moments, you sit in the stands, virtually, scheduled and cheer for them; accompanied by Mina. — The feeling of nostalgia, remembering an incredible part of his life, is exposed in Ken's chest; remembering his mother.

⭑.ᐟ I can easily imagine Ken pressing his nose against your cheek or neck wanting your attention; also, when he wants to show you the way Emi is sleeping, enjoying the baby's sweetness. — And, together, pressing his forehead against yours during countless moments of the day and night, when you get home after confronting some creature and every time he want to say "i love you" to you.

⭑.ᐟ This man knows you like the back of his hand; no one can disagree or dispute this fact. — Kenji pays attention to your gestures, noticing your body language and, for a matter of seconds, he knows that something is bothering you; and, there he is, dedicating himself, with all his attention, to doing his girl well.

⭑.ᐟ Funny situations, for Ken, between you and his Ultraman form are included in your lives. — Once, while chasing Aboras, he ended up finding you on the street, wanting to go home, and clearly he was distracted by wanting to cause a provocation. — Mina gave the boy a long, and rightly so, scolding.

“Go back to the house, young lady.” — The robotic voice filled a part of the city's environment, wanting to convey an authoritarian image. — “You know…” — He pointed one of his gigantic fingers in your direction, then towards the place he was. — “The streets have been very dangerous lately.” — Oh, you stopped yourself from answering him like you really wanted to.

“Thank you, so much, for the advice, Ultraman.”

⭑.ᐟ There are nights — many, many nights — that Ken spends watching, contemplating you sleeping, peacefully; your face remained full, without signs of tiredness, exquisite and messy locks spread out, this was adored by the player's eyes. — Between seconds of fascination, Kenji longed, dreamed, deeply and painfully, of his mother meeting you; this way, she would have the chance to know the light that raised her dear son.

⤷ Kenji prospers, sometimes praying, that one day his mother will return, safe and sound, and be able to achieve what he wants so much in his life.