#last post for elliott!

[beachyserasims]

(With a soulful and introspective tone) Hello, everyone. My name is Elliott, and I'm on this incredible journey to find my missing half. To me, life is an extraordinary tapestry of experiences, encompassing not only the grand and beautiful moments that take our breath away but also the beauty that lies hidden in the darkest corners of a person's soul. It's about embracing both sides and finding fulfillment even in a world that can be cruel and dark.

Growing up in the heart of a mining community has made me keenly aware of the importance of being conscious of Mother Nature and our impact on her. It might have given me a gloomy side, but it's also shaped me into someone who seeks solace and expression through creativity. I find refuge in writing poetry, and sometimes I'll even strum the guitar, letting my emotions flow through the melodies. It's my way of capturing the duality that resides within my soul.

You could say I'm a bit of a hopeless romantic, but at the core of it all, what I truly desire is to find someone to walk through life's hills and valleys with, both metaphorically and literally. I yearn for a deep connection—a love that transcends the surface and dives into the depths of understanding and compassion.

This journey is about more than just finding a partner; it's about finding someone who can embrace the beauty in both the light and the shadow, someone who appreciates the poetry in life's contradictions. I'm ready to open my heart and share my life with that special person, creating a love story that's as profound and enchanting as the verses I pen.

So, if you're out there, searching for a love that's as deep and meaningful as I am, let's embark on this adventure together. Let's explore the intricacies of life and love, hand in hand, and discover the magic that awaits us in every corner of this beautiful, complex world.

The Start || Previous || Next

[coveredinsun]

as a rule i really love men with long luscious hair who are also gay. this makes enjoying tolkien very easy

[wynsvre]

elliott smith study

[plumboey]

i may need to make shane from sdv in the sims so my simself can marry him........ i love him too much i need him in every universe

[manicpixielosergirl]

intro post:3

hiii im ula and welcome to my blog!!

✮ i'm 15, lesbian, polish, and my pronouns are she/her

✮ i'm looking for moots bc i love making friends lol

✮ i'm from poland and i'm bilingual in polish & english but i also speak a bit of spanish

✮ i follow everyone back:]

movies, tv shows, books, and games i'm into:

a song of ice and fire, yellowjackets, the last of us, undertale, deltarune, life is strange, the virgin suicides, hamilton, the perks of being a wallflower, almost famous, adventure time

my fav artists/bands:

phoebe bridgers, lucy dacus, julien baker, the 1975, david bowie, boygenius, ethel cain, elliott smith, radiohead, kate bush, mazzy star, cocteau twins, joy division, pink floyd, judas priest, björk, florence + the machine, metallica, lana del rey

i'm also rlly interested in typology so for any fellow nerds out there here's my full typology:

enfp sx728 iee-fi elvf²¹¹¹ /S/LuA[I] sang-mel

[pixel--moon]

Top 3 Dover 2024 Schemes in Pixel Form 🏁

9️⃣ Elliott

1️⃣2️⃣ Blaney

2️⃣3️⃣ Wallace

[insta]

[and-i-want-and-i-need]

Y’ALL-

[twizzlyworm]

Oldish xpex wegends some drawn w/ my left hand

[riot-control-camp]

me when drafting only the emotional climax of a fic in my diary server that is me my best friend and 5 bots doesn't count as Telling People About My Fic:

[thecentrium]

okay everybody it’s “deeply investigating Epson family traits and history” time

[arverst-aegnar]

I've seen a lot of Pride and Prejudice Zutara takes, and read this excellent inspired-by-Emma Zutara story, so now i'm thinking about a Zutara Persuasion AU.

[elliotts-personal-property]

Seeing that the Chief’s won I feel like this is the only appropriate time to post this🏈

Anyway’s I’m not a 49ers hater but I always thought 40 Whiners was funny😭

[i-dont-want-your-hysteria]

👁️🫦👁️

[melonae]

also poorly drawn horse

[bluetraverser]

Long post: The end of a story I never wrote - HighschoolAU - Stardew - Robert/Elliott

...They fell, crushed, stumbled into an embrace and he found himself crying uncontrollably. His entire body felt stiff and limp at the same time, his skin taut over his head and arms while he shuddered and sobbed at the sudden joy and pain of having him in arms reach again. While the life here was good, he had been so terribly lonely, so unable to let go of loving this man and…

(context and full chapter under the cut)

Okay, this needs a bit of introduction because this is basically part of a chapter for a story that would have had 20 or more chapters which I will likely never write. Or not for several years. Who knows. What follows is a very quick summary of the plot and then the actual story.

First of all: Chapter takes place in Pelican town - on the day Elliott moves there, much earlier than in any canon.

Story so far: Elliott and Robert both go to highschool??? Idk, a school where you go to when you're 18 at least, I am not comfortable with younger. Elliott is a rich kid who hates his parents and vice versa. Bookish, unpopular, somewhat aloof, pretty... in a word, Elliott.

Robert is a popular sports guy with all the cliches of gay guy who is terrified of people knowing he is gay so hes a bully and seemingly ladies man who always finds excuses to never actually do anything with them.

Obviously they fall in love.

Both are terrified of it, both pretend like nothings going on. After a very complicated instance of the good old "there is only one bed", they spend several nights of passion before ultimately Elliott breaks up with him and says they will likely never meet again because his dad is a monster, they will never be safe, yada yada, Robert does not take it well.

At the start of this chapter, neither of them has any idea what has become of the other but Elliott has finally managed to get away from his abusive family. Its been 2 years since they last met.

I think that hopefully set up all the most important points. Feel free to ask or comment about this!

-----------------------

Elliott felt an odd, uncomfortable weight within himself.

This was it.

He was free.

But he was also poor. He had no degree, barely any money… The bus stopped. „Pelican town!“ Elliott got off with a heavy heart.

It was beautiful.

He breathed in.

He dropped his bags.

Fresh, full air made his lungs blow wide, made the sheer act of breathing a joy. He smelled the ocean and the forests, the vitalizing greens of vibrant moss soaking in the country sun… It was invigorating.

Still, he picked up his bags again and looked around, trying to get a sense of which direction he was supposed to go. The shed he had rented was supposedly right at the ocean. From his notes, that meant he first needed to go left, then across a square, across a bridge and to the left again… But was that left from facing the bus stop or the other way around? He could see a fenced in farm with a house down the street, to his right. Going left was probably wise, but… He dropped his bags again and walked a little bit closer, curious as to his new environment and Neighbors. It was a nice little house that looked like it had recently been renovated. The fields that lay before it weren’t spectacularly wide but seemed to span a large assortment of different plants. How curious! He had thought it would be more common to source only one kind of plant per field. Was this a commercial farm or just someone living there with a big garden? His gaze grazed the mailbox and his heart stuttered in his chest as reality seemed to suddenly be turned on its hinges.

Robert Llyr

!

Elliott felt the air being sucked out of his lungs, stunned, confused, desperate in that insane hope suddenly rushing his mind away. It’s impossible! It can’t be him! It’s a freak coincidence! It’s...it’s…

He squinted over the fields, trying to find sight of anyone doing anything there and- A blond man surfaced between the rows of corn. He had spiky hair and bend down just now, doing something with the plants. Disappointment plummeted through his belly. He was starting to feel sick. The permanent up and down of this weird day, these rushes of hope and dread and pain and that blinding beauty of his new freedom but the sickness of being just so god-damn lonely on this path- He put his hands on his face, breathing. Trying to collect himself, trying to calm down. „Hey! You okay there?“

Elliott startled but the blonde was already approaching him in quick steps. „Looking a lil shaken there, mate.“

„Uhm. Uh. I’m fine, I’m fine, thank you!“

The man examined him for a moment, then his bags. „You new in town?“

Elliott awkwardly shrugged, then nodded. „Yes. I just got off the bus.“

„Ah. Lucky you that the bus runs at all. The man who lives here fixed it only last month. It was broken for years before that!“

„Oh. So. You, uh, you don’t live here?“

The man chuckled. „Nah man, couldn’t afford it. Robert lives here. He inherited the plot and moved here last year. My name is Sam, I live down in Willow Lane with my mom and brother. Do you know where you’re going?“

„I… Yes. I rented a place at the beach. And I wrote down directions. I was just curious I guess and…“ He contemplated for a moment how open to be with this person. He’d been friendly enough and… asking couldn’t hurt, could it. „...say, this Robert Llyr. Do you know him on a personal level? Like… do you know where he lived before?“

Sam made a motion to grab one of his bags. „Want my help carrying your stuff? I’m headed in the direction you’re going so I might as well help you out.“

„I- Uh- I… S-sure, that would be great. Thank you.“

Oh god, what a bumbling idiot I am being! One hint that even reminds me of him makes me a complete and utter fool! What must this man think of me already!

„Sorry, I just. I knew a Robert Llyr once and. It kind of shook me to see his name. I’m Elliott, by the way.“

Sam grinned at him widely. „Well hello Elliott. I’m Sam. But I already said that. Come on, let’s get going.“ He grabbed his bag and started walking. „And sure, I know Robert, we’re friends. Otherwise I wouldn’t have walked over his property and stolen one of his cauliflowers.“ He jangled a bag in his other hand around.

„You stole of him?“

„Not really. It’s cool with him if we take stuff and tell him later and he tells us what we owe once a week. Works out pretty okay. He’s a good egg but I don’t know where he lived before. He’s a little bit secretive like that. But he’s been working his ass off with the farm and making this town a better place, so. Not like anyone could complain about him, ever. What’s the Robert like that you know?“

„He’s...well…“ Handsome. Beautiful. Brave. Sad. God I miss you-„...complicated. We met under somewhat...difficult circumstances and he wasn’t always as nice as he could have been, I guess. But that wasn’t his fault and…“ He sighed. „It’s. Complicated. I mean, I’ll see if its him in good time, right?“

„I would guess so.“ They had reached what was probably the center of town. „This is basically the place where it gets most busy in this place. If at all. You got Pierres over there, selling mostly groceries n stuff, you got the mayors house over there and theres a notice board in front of Pierres shop if somebody in town has a small job or something.“

„Jobs?“

„Yeah, like, if they want somebody to fetch something for them or help them with a project. Things like that. Usually pays okay and people are grateful. Theres also a joja markt a lil further up the road and Clint’s shop is over there but I think he only sells rocks, no idea. I don’t really talk to him.“ They had gone across the square. „And this is the road where I live, Willow Lane.“ He handed Elliott's bag back to him. „You got any questions before I leave you to find your way across the bridge?“

Elliott stared for a moment, still trying to somehow digest the entire situation. „I...No.“ He managed a smile. „Thank you so much. You’ve been a great help.“

„No sweat, man! Take it easy!“ He waved and wandered off, leaving Elliott with a pounding, heavy heart and all the questions in the world.

Where would this person be? What should he do if it wasn’t him? ...what if it was him? Would he forgive him? Was he single? Ye gods, he was desperate to be with him. Had been for the past two years! But the need had been lying dormant and buried for so long now, it had been bearable. The current state was like a fresh, overwhelming physical urge to find him and hold him. To just have him back in his arms! But it was impossible. Impossible. He had to steel himself for the strong likelihood of this just being a freak name coincidence. That he would never see him again.

He walked across the beach and to the ocean.

It was the first time he saw the ocean.

It should be a wonderful moment. And it was. It was amazing to see it.

But it also felt hollow.

Everything seemed to mean nothing like this. Everything was just so dull, so… A figure sat at the end of the pier, near the hut he assumed to be the one he had rented.

Black hair. Slightly hunched.

It couldn’t be.

Elliott dropped his bags again and slowly walked onto the pier, barely daring to breathe. The figure looked even buffer than Robert had been. A broad back. Strong arms. The man was fishing. He looked. A lot like Robert did. As far as he could tell from behind. But the possibility of the man turning and it just being someone completely different-

He took another small step forward.

Another.

And Another. He had to know. He had to know…

The person turned and Elliott's heart stuttered out of his chest, unable to say anything in this moment.

It was him.

Robert looked at him with an unreadable expression. He got up, wiping his hands on a tissue, stepping up to him. He looked just a little bit different. Stronger around the jaw. Overall, even fitter. Kinder in the eyes. More peaceful. A small smile started gracing his features as he stepped up to him, reaching out with one hand, as if to see if he was real.

Elliott took his hand. Heard himself make a whimpering, emotional sound. Or had Robert done that? Robert smiled wider, blinking tears from his eyes. „How… are you here?“

Elliott pressed his lips together, unable to keep the tears from falling. „I...I don’t know.“ He wished he had something poetic to say but he was completely overwhelmed, clasping both his hands now, so full of uncertainty and need and-

-----

They fell, crushed, stumbled into an embrace and Robert found himself crying uncontrollably. His entire body felt stiff and limp at the same time, his skin taut over his head and arms while he shuddered and sobbed at the sudden joy and pain of having him in arms reach again. While the life here was good, he had been so terribly lonely, so unable to let go of loving this man and… He cupped his face, looking at him, drinking in his strawberry hair and those green eyes.

And remembered.

He sighed and let go, rubbing his eyes. „I… it’s. Good to see you. Elliott.“

Elliott stared at him with pained eyes. „Yes… i… Robert I’m. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry! At the time… I was sure there was no hope! I didn’t think so now! Or I wouldn’t have…“

Robert shrugged. „It’s… not like I didn’t understand. I. I’m. I just. I’m not sure what to feel right now.“ He swallowed hard. „What are you doing here?“

„I… guess I’m moving here today.“ Elliott smiled. „I finally got a restraining order against my father and his goons, I worked a little while to get some money and then just. Left. I…“ He sighed. „I would have tried to find you if. If I had had any idea… I suppose. It didn’t occur to me to investigate where you could have gone, to be honest. I didn’t feel like I would deserve your forgiveness. And I felt. I would not be able to bear your disdain, should you… should you feel bitter towards me.“ „So you had no idea I was here?“

Elliott shook his head. „No. I just. I worked for a little while to get a few savings. Then looked for a cheap place near the ocean somewhere. Earlier I saw your mailbox and. Dared not to hope. But. I. Longed for you anyway.“

„God… you make me feel so...conflicted.“

Elliott smiled wryly. “And why is that?”

Robert groaned. If only he wasn’t so cute! If only he hadn’t missed him so goddamn much! Robert had been in absolute agony when Elliott had left with the definitive statement that he didn’t think they would meet again. That Robert should move on. Give up on them. That they would never be safe together. Had left without really giving Robert a say in any of it. And he had been mad for a long time. Because he still loved him. Because he had missed him more than he felt appropriate for what had ultimately been a quick fling in his school years… And yet. Looking at him now, he wanted nothing but give in and fall into him again completely. Robert leaned his head on Elliott's shoulder, sighing. He felt Elliott slowly, hesitantly put his arms around him again. Allowing him time to stop him if he had wanted to… “I’m sorry I hurt you, Robert. I understand if you don’t want to just forgive me.”

------

“It’s… less that I don’t want to. More like I’m not sure if I should.”

Elliott leaned his head against him, trying to just… to just not… God. He wanted this to be okay. He wanted him to be okay. Both of them. They were finally together again but… but… He pressed a kiss to the others head.

I love you.

He had never said the words to him. He hadn’t known when they were together. And later...later… “I. Don’t want to pressure you. And I won’t. I…” He took a deeper breath, trying to feel okay with maybe letting go off him, but Robert was holding on to him tightly, despite the situation… “...I mean. I will be living here now. And you are too. And. If you don’t want to see me for a bit. Then. I understand. Even though I. I would. Of course. Very much want… to see you…” He was staring at his lips. Robert looked at him through tear-stained eyes with a stubborn expression. Elliott waited for a reply but Robert was just staring at him now. Elliott tried not to be too obvious the way he stared at him, tried to stop thinking about wanting to kiss him but the more he tried to stop himself, the more he wanted it, imagined what their lips felt like together, wanted to find a quiet place with him and-

Robert put a hand on his face and kissed him. Elliott felt a bolt of energy unleash in him as he rushed against him to kiss him back, pulling him closer, losing himself in the sweetness of his mouth that dissolved all thoughts and filled him with bliss… They slowly opened another more, lips rubbing and pressing against another while his tongue sought entrance into his mouth and… Mmmh…

He stroked through his hair, down his back, pulled him closer around the hip while he pushed himself forward, thoroughly lost in the sensation now, kissing his lost love on this pier at the edge of his new life, unexpectedly having salvaged the best thing from his old… They finally broke apart after who knew how long, heated and dazed… Elliott stroked his face, fighting the urge to kiss that dazed smile some more. He brushed his lips over his cheek. “Does this mean you want to see me some more too?”

Robert laughed and kissed his nose. “I don’t know if I will regret this. But right now I want to drag you to my home and have sex with you. Which is not actually what we should do, given that you just arrived and all. But yes.” He smiled. “I guess I do want to see you ‘some more’.”

[Plot note, timeskip; off-screen: they go back to the beach. Robert say he needs to sell his fresh fish, Elliott uses the chance to say hi to willy who is please he already knows someone and immediately knows whats up so leaves them alone in the cabin pretty soon but they soon realize they should go to roberts place cause they cannot keep their hands off eachother and Elliott simply wants to shower before doing it for the first time in two years. they decide to shower together] [some mild sex stuff ahead]

Elliott unfastened his tie while brushing his teeth, tracing his eyes over his now-finally-again partner, likewise brushing his teeth. Elliott could barely wait to take his clothes off and see all of him. He already looked delicious, sweats and sweatshirt sticking beautifully to his strong body regardless of fashion choice. Robert rinsed his mouth and Elliott started nearly tripping over himself when he took off his shirt. God, he looked good. The farmwork was certainly working in favor of his physique… He quickly rinsed his mouth, put down the toothbrush and the next moment they were kissing again. Elliott groaned into the kiss, thoroughly delighted to feel his naked chest beneath his hands while they both worked on opening Elliotts remaining buttons… Robert pushed himself against him and his hands wandered down… They had to at least briefly wash themselves, he knew. But stumbling naked beneath the shower with him, so close, so… mmh…

------

Robert wanted to savor this. Two long years since he’d been with him. And all the last times they’d had sex had been fast and desperate in half-public places. Uncomfortable and full of fear in so many terrible ways… But he wasn’t really thinking anything any-more. The water was rushing around them, his hands wandering across Elliotts back and chest and ass, tempted to rub his cock, take it in his mouth, to turn over and…

Elliott pressed him against the wall, kissing him deeply, reaching between his legs-

Robert cried out in pleasure, trying to adjust, trying to spread his legs more in the slippery space when Elliott kneeled down somewhat suddenly and his brain gave out…

He started coming back to himself more when Elliott washed off the shower lotion he’d spread on both of them after. He’d been holding on to the grip bar while Elliott was pleasuring him and was now slowly coming down from the high…

“You okay, darling?”

“...yes…”

Elliott smiled and kissed his forehead, then turned off the water. “I suppose, there goes my plan of keeping my hair dry.” He reached for the towels.

“Heh. Well, you didn’t have to go down on me.”

“Mmh, but I loved doing it.” He squeezed his hand, then pressed a couple of kisses to his cheek. “...And I cannot wait to continue.” ---- They tumbled to bed, kissing and stroking and a part of him reminded him just how incredible this was. Twenty-four hours ago he hadn’t known if he would ever see him again. Had been anxious and unsure about leaving his old home for good, going to a place where he knew nobody with very little resources…

Now he had him in his arms, entwined as they kissed and loved another and it felt better than any time they had done this before.

They were free. They were both free.

He stilled. Pulled himself out of the kiss and focused on embracing him. He rubbed their cheeks together and pressed close, sighing softly. He had his eyes closed and just breathed. Breathed the beauty of the moment. Focused on this feeling of his loves strong arms holding him so tight and so loving, of this buzzing heady feeling in his mind that blinded him to all but the delicate feeling pouring out of him… “I love you.” He whimpered, overwhelmed by his emotion. “I love you, Robert.” He looked into his partners tear-stricken ocean-blues. “I never thought I’d see you again. But in the pain of being heart-broken, I relished in knowing the truth of this feeling. I was prepared to carry the pain until my end, if it meant I could also keep carrying the love. Even if it meant loneliness for all this life.”

Robert sobbed, emotion heavy on his face, changing from sorrow to contemplation and perhaps, some joy in a small moment until a smile graced his features and he stroked over Elliotts face again. “...and now?”

Elliott laughed. “Now I hold you in my arms… in what seems like the most unbelievable twist of my life. In what seems like the universe must have a conscience because our paths leading us here seem to unbelievable to be possible. Now up is down, the world is a circle. The birds sing and will always sing in the mountains of the world because I have you now and in this moment. And if all fails and my heart will be broken again, my love for you will still be whole. Made full, finally, by being here with you, finally offering my heart to you in earnest.”

Robert rubbed his face, crying, shaking his head… “Jesus christ, Elliott… How can you...how…”

Elliott pressed his lips together, hoping, praying he hadn’t ruined it all, That this didn’t mean… Robert embraced him again. “You goddamn dramatic idiot… Of course I love you too!”

Elliott shuddered, hugging him back, more tears flowing from his eyes while his brain seemed to spin and dance and light bloomed deep within him. “I love you.” He cupped his face, smiling like a fool no doubt but more happy than he’d ever been in his life. “I love you.” He kissed him once, twice. “I love you.”

“I love you too! And I hate that I had to wait two years to be able to tell you!”

Elliott smiled and kissed his nose. “Me too. But now we’re together. Isn’t that all that should matter?”

Robert made a face. “Kind of. I guess. I...argh! You’re just… you’re just…you’re… ah…”

Elliott had started nibbling at his neck, breathing warmly into his ear making soft, urging sounds while he touched him some more and…

“Elliott-”

“Hmm?” He kissed him…

...and all thought vanished...

[unabashedly-so]

A while ago, @hopefuloverfury tagged me in a last line meme! (Thank you! 💕) I hadn't written much at the time, but today I've finally got something to contribute. 🥳

It's rough AF, y'all. Bear with me; I'm so rusty. 😂

He returns his gaze to his drink, considers it, then sets it down out of reach of both of you this time. "...and that man also happens to be the same lucky fellow who will have to own up to his mess the next morning."

What a choice of words. You hurry your drink to your lips to ensure inside thoughts do stay inside.

If you're reading this and wanna play along, consider yourself tagged!