#last one is from youtube because netflix is a fucking bitch

[walkingclownemoji]

[symbioticsimplicity]

This Idiot Has Seen Goncharov

So today marked the coalescence of the Goncharov Incident as I’ll be calling it, so I think it’s finally time to share.

For a bit of context, you need to know a little more about one of my co-workers. We’ll call him Zeke. First it’s important to note that despite being in his early thirties, Zeke doesn’t have any sort of social media accounts outside of a MySpace page. Dude has straight up been living like it’s still 2007. Zeke also has a fixation with my friend/roommate who also works with us. Zeke will hop onto whatever bandwagon this friend, who we’ll call Jesse, is on. But most importantly to this whole tableau, Zeke likes to tell tall tales, like no matter what you’re talking about, or what you’ve done, this guy has done it but bigger and crazier.

That alone would be annoying, but it wouldn’t be enough to push myself and Jesse to the level we’ve hit with him. For me, it’s the constant need to put other people down for ‘knowing less than he does’ despite the obviousness of his knowledge being a collection of poorly constructed lies. Like not only does he lie, but this dumbass doesn’t even bother to check into the things he lies about. Several times he’s tried to convince me of something in a subject I know everything about. He refuses to admit to being wrong and he won’t back down from anything he’s said, it’s infuriating.

For this, and quite a few other reasons transphobic cough cough augh, he’s been bothering Jesse and I for quite a while. Badly enough that the spite fueled wasp nest that lives in the back corner of my brain Morse coded a plan to me.

Goncharov.

What better way to trip up a ride or die compulsive liar than a piece of media well known for being entirely fictional?

The next day, when Zeke climbed into my car during our lunch hour, Jesse and I began talking about this old movie we’d recently watched. The two of us have known each other more than long enough to able to follow each other’s bullshit like second nature, we’ve played an assload of DND together. In ten minutes we’ve got the whole first arc talked out with a few of the “best scenes” highlighted. (Personal favorites being Andrey juggling guns “a la John Wick/Guns Akimbo” and Katya killing a man point blank after saying ‘Get Gonch’d bitch’ in a 1973 film.)

Zeke didn’t respond too much, just kind of nodded and ignored most of the convo since it wasn’t really about him. I didn’t really expect him to engage to start, he usually doesn’t, but we’d planned to keep this up for another couple days anyhow.

But like clockwork, the more Jesse talked about it, the more Zeke seemed to remember it. Enough that I jumped ahead a little and pulled up the faux movie poster to show him.

He squinted at it then nodded and said he’d definitely seen the movie before.

When I tell you I almost fucking screamed.

Of course he couldn’t remember many details because it had been so long since he’d seen it. To tell you the truth I’d checked out at that point, I was focused on not losing my shit, I have no fucking idea what he said.

While this was an entire meal served up on a silver platter, it would have been pretty easy to say he’d seen the poster somewhere despite not having socials. I want this man incinerated, not merely singed.

Which leads me to the events of the last couple days.

So Zeke came up to Jesse and I and told us he wanted to re-watch Goncharov and asked us if it’s on Netflix.

Jesse and I both said that it is, without hesitation.

Zeke went to look for it (at work, while we’re working no less, again I missed the rest of what he was saying here I was mentally biting him) and obviously found nothing. So he searched every other streaming platform he had, and Youtube, all once again coming up empty.

At this point, I was sure the jig is up. He was actually searching it now so obviously he’d find one of the search results letting him know Goncharov’s true nature. I’m fairly certain the first result for it on Google says that it’s fake.

Oh hoo hoo, no.

Zeke came to me to complain about not being able to find the movie and in a fit of clandestine fervor, I told him that we probably watched it on a pirating site.

It was beautiful, it was inspired, and it worked.

Zeke asked me for the site and I told him that I’d have to get it from our other roommate since she’s in charge of the tech in our house. Then I hauled ass to go find Jesse and spill the latest tea before Zeke could. 

Later on Jesse sent him the link to the site, and he told us he’d find it over the weekend.

Well today, friends, is Monday.

Most of today we spent too busy to go grill Zeke about whether or not he’s crossed over into the fucking Mandela timeline and managed to watch Goncharov. But ten minutes before close, while we’re waiting to go, suddenly Zeke perks up, and remembers that when he gets home, he has to finish watching the movie. He’d had trouble getting the site to work on his phone, but his Xbox had run it, and he’d started watching it, but had unfortunately fallen asleep before he’d finished.

Now. I am a calm man, I can keep a straight face if I need to. But hearing this fucking idiot tell me he’d started watching a fictitious movie made up by Tumblr.com of all places nearly sent me to the fucking Shadow Realm with the amount of effort it took not to crack.

He talked for a couple more minutes before fucking off to do something else, I have no idea again I wasn’t fucking listening, I was trying not to visibly cry from holding back laughter.

But then he left and like instinct, like the inevitable impact of atoms inside of the Hadron collider, Jesse and I turned to look at each other. I knew what Jesse would say, Jesse knew what I would say, and like fate, like destiny, like two people who had witnessed a man commit manslaughter against his own damn self, we spoke at once.

“This idiot has seen Goncharov.”

[phoenixfire-thewizardgoddess]

Thank you @the-grimsqueaker

3 ships I like but lets be real there's few I don't just point me at a fandom and duck: Xena Warrior Princess/Gabrielle, Alastor/anyone but charlie or vaggie because I like found family tropes and you'd have to kill me to stop me (Hazbin Hotel), and Tom Paris/B'Lanna Torres/Harry Kim (ST:Voyager)

First ship ever: the one i remember most prominently was Xena/Gabrielle, she was on tv when i was little. I may have liked some of the Sailor Moon sailor scouts together at some point but it's not coming back to me as anything but a blurry mess. never knew if i wanted to be xena or marry her... and gabrielle lmao.

Last song I heard: running through my brain all day counts right? MONSTER from Epic: The Musical tied with the very last song of the entire musical because the haunting refrain of 'waiiiiiiting, WAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiting, waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaiting' is really deep in the brain box lmao.

Favourite childhood book: Listen, the first series i read independently and then siling and i would listen to parent read to us, was Harry Potter. So despite the fucking mess the author is, it does sit in my heart somewhere. I had fluffy weird hair and wanted to be hermione so bad, Ron was deep in my heart lmao.

But like, the book i think about most, was Martin the Warrior and Mossflower, the first two Rewall books. I consider them jointly important because they were like Oh look, so sweet a world of mice and dandelion cordial and oops, did that big emotional plot twist turn your ribs concave and you became distraught as a little person reading about the grief and sorrow of little woodland things? Awwww. Suffer you little thing and know empathy.

Currently Reading: I was re-reading the CROWDED graphic novels series. Slowly re-getting books (that are still in print) i lost in the fire. Also technically in the middle of the Wicked and the Divine series, the priory of the orange tree (like a page in my brain is so full of Work right now its a nightmare to focus on non-fanfic stuff rn), the witch's throne and at least one or two others that are not coming to me.

They're bookmarked and around this house SOMEWHERE.

Currently watching: Random nonsense on youtube, and rewatching brainless nonsense on family streaming services (i have netflix, someone else has prime and someone else has disney, but the D lords lock me out bc different households as if they're desperate for cash lmao). Currently have acient Supernatural playing on my tv right now... it's uh, hmmm.

Castlevania Nocturne was pretty fun tho.

Currently consuming: more calories than i should have given i dodged exercising the past 2-3 days, like the lazy bitch i am lmao. Somehow absolutely fucked up a cake mix yesterday, not sure how i did that... its like a thick, angry pancake. Let this be my first recorded miracle on the journey to sainthood, lmao.

Currently craving: Answers to silly personal issues. An end to this annoying headache but it's being an ASS. Some sort of meal but ive just realised its past midnight so nah.

---

I'm a very generic person, sadly. Definitely comic relief side character #3 who the fandom hates for existing lmao.

Tag, you're it:

@littlelokilover @prince-darkleboop @sxpaiscia @grezzirossi @princessgremlin @ursy153

fandom friends i'd like to know better

tagged by: @lowkeyed1

tagging: @the-grimsqueaker @taralkariel @midnightxscape @istopsomewherewaitingforyou @terriblethanksforasking @ghost-walking-in-a-boring-dream @littleblackraincloudofcourse @callmekitlover

3 ships i like: Jade Claymore/Kit Tanthalos, Korra/Asami Sato, Enfys Nest/Jyn Erso (why are there only like 7 fics of this rarepair…I need more!)

first ship ever: oh god I dunno. Me and April O’Neil from TMNT, does that count?! 😝

last song you heard: Perfect Stranger - FKA Twigs

favorite childhood book: The Little Prince - Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

currently reading: Mostly Tanthamore fanfic, but some other Erin Kellyman character fanfics too. Listening to The Poppy War by R.F. Kuang, and the Willow novelization which @lowkeyed1 is reading on Discord (thank you for this, it’s a highlight of my week!)

currently watching: Harlem (about to start season 3, Severance, No Good Deed, Unrivalled 3x3 basketball, rewatching ALOTO, just finished the SLOCG (Bela’s a girlkisser - my dreams are coming true!)

currently consuming: Padmanadi’s leftovers

currently craving: more Padmanadi’s, it’s craving never ends, it’s too good.

[virusinfected-memes]

TIK TOK SENTENCE STARTERS, PT. 5 ;

85 starters. CW: cussing, sexual themes, violence. Some starters are just random quotes from Tik Tok creators, some starters are from Tik Tok trends that have popped up over the past year or so. The original sources of these trends are from various memes, shows, songs, and other popular media. Feel free to change words and pronouns as needed! [PARTS: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4]

"Alright, on your knees, mortal scum! You stand in the presence of _____!"

"Always remember: you may not be able to change the past, but you can still ruin the future."

"Am I ever gonna get it?"

"And if you call me a bitch, make sure to put 'sensitive' in front of it."

"And I keep my side of the street clean. You wouldn't know what I mean."

"But I can't forgive you."

"But I don't want to stay in the middle."

"Can I get a kiss? And can you make it last forever?"

"Come out and haunt me."

"Did I mistake you for a sign from God?"

"Don't be ridiculous, _____. Everybody wants this."

"Don't try to find me."

"Do you ever just have this deep seated desire to bother people? I have clown blood."

"Do you think I'm fragile?"

"Do you wanna dance, baby?"

"Everybody wants to rule the world."

"Get in, sparkle farts! We got chaos to spread!"

"Help me make the most of freedom and of pleasure."

"Honey, I love you. I think you're a terrific girl. But you have clothes like a fucking dickhead."

"I can't take Benadryl because I owe the Hat Man money and I don't want to see him."

"I didn't know I could love something this much until I laid my eyes on you."

"I don't ever wanna see you and I never wanna miss you again."

"I don't need to be fixed. I need to be rebuilt."

"If you touch that again, I shall kill you right now. Do not touch this! This is a 'no touching' zone!"

"I got nothing to lose."

"I guarantee I gotcha'."

"I have not behaved one single day of my life. Not one single day have I behaved and I'm fine."

"I just can't say goodbye."

"I just heard a butt-curdling scream."

"I know that violence is not the answer, but... Yes, it is."

"I know you see me looking at you on the daily."

"I know you want me."

"I love that Netflix was like, "OoOoh, we're gonna reduce your quality to 480p if you don't pay us more!" Like, bruh... I come from the land of 144p Naruto episodes cut into sixteen parts on YouTube. 480 is luxury. 480 is bouge."

"I'm absolutely a danger to my own mental health."

"I'm comin' back for you, baby."

"I mean, look at this thing! I can't imagine a more beautiful thing."

"I mean, what if I don't want to live the way you live?"

"I might be broke as hell tomorrow, but that's alright, 'cause I'm that bitch today."

"I might kill my ex. Not the best idea."

"I'm in a trance lately."

"I'm not going to nap. I'm just going to rest my eyes and clench my teeth for a little while."

"Im not like other girls. I'm worse."

"I'm one of those witches, babe."

"I'm sorry, but I'm just thinking of the right words to say."

"I'm the love witch. I seduce men with my spells, my potions, my eyes, and my body."

"I'm tired of working on myself. I will now be unapologetically insane."

"I never make the same mistake twice. I make it, like, six or seven times."

"In my dreams, I'm making you pasta and nothing bad has happened to us yet."

"I said I wasn't gonna be judgmental, but fuck it. I'm sick, I have an excuse."

"I think I like when it rains."

"It's already too late for you to try and run away."

"It's me. Hi. I'm the problem, it's me."

"I want to get on my broomstick and fly away with my kitty to another city to work on my witch powers, then live with a pregnant woman who owns a bakery and start a delivery service."

"I want to go to there."

"I was at about six there. You don't wanna see me go to ten."

"Mortals, behold! The glory of the kill is mine!"

"No, I don't think you understand. I'm obsessed."

"Normalize being a sleepyhead. It's okay to be eternally trapped within the realm of ancient dreams."

"Nothing ever lasts forever."

"Not working out? Not eating right? Fucked up sleep schedule? You aren't depressed. You're on your way to achieving tremendous arcane power. Become the wizard you were meant to be."

"Oh, you think the b-word's offensive? You should hear what I say in the Call of Duty lobbies."

"Okay, I don't know how you went this long without knowing this, but there are people out there who create original Sonic the Hedgehog characters, and often those characters fuck."

"Okay, well, what you said was some bullshit. That's what it is."

"Okay... Why'd you have to fucking bring that up?"

"One kiss is all it takes."

"Something horrible is happening inside of me and I don't know why."

"So you're telling me if I killed your family, you wouldn't be my friend anymore?"

"Take a swing. Here's my neck."

"The next time you feel lazy, remember that laziness is a puritanical myth based on the sin of idleness and is used to oppress people into forced labor."

"There are currently no bug-dragon dual type Pokémon, but I wanna share a few insects that I think would make good candidates for being the first."

"They keep on asking me who is he."

"What are you gonna do with that? You gonna hit me? Better make it count. Better make it hurt. Better kill me with one shot."

"Whatever I've done, I did it for love."

"Which was more culturally significant? The Renaissance... or 'Single Ladies' by Beyoncé?"

"Who wants to look simple when you can look stunning?"

"Why do I keep getting attracted?"

"Why don't you sit right down and stay a while?"

"Why do we keep telling people who aren't freaky that they're vanilla? Vanilla is the freakiest flavor. Like, look at ice cream, for example. It goes good with all of the toppings. Vanilla doesn't care who you pair it up with, so long as they get on top. I aspire to be as slutty as vanilla is. Also, if you are a slut, what flavor of ice cream are you, bitch? Pistachio? Neo-political? That's fucking disgusting."

"Will I get over it? No. But life goes on."

"Yeah, I'm gay. Good at Yu-Gi-Oh."

"Yes, I am doing blasphemy! Yes!"

"You better fix my entire life, you little shit."

"You can't keep me waiting."

"You might play the same games as me, but I play them in a far worse and more unskilled way than you ever will."

"You're just being cynical."

[veronicasanders]

tagged by effervescent goddess @glittertrail ✨✨✨✨

last tv show: well, I’m watching all stars 7 right now but the last episode of something I finished was real housewives of beverly hills - season 1 (one of my friends convinced me to start it and even thought there are 3 blonde bitches I can’t tell apart, I’m not hating it) 

last song: well I was listening to the Godspell soundtrack, and I stopped it on “Alas for You” which is a little bleak but there you go. 

currently watching: way too much, I’m a TV whore…as7 and rhobh (see above), as well as real housewives of both New Jersey and Atlanta (current seasons), a rewatch of masterchef junior (look, I know it’s probably staged but I’m a sucker for children having fun and being nice to each other), the 47th rewatch of the baby-sitter’s club on netflix, the connors (shut up okay, I’ve been invested in this family since the 80s), a Swedish show called “bonus family” where I hate pretty much all the characters but I need to practice Swedish so…, a YouTube show that Edith got me hooked on called “fundie fridays,” and my “news” shows to sort of keep up with shit (last week tonight with john oliver, full frontal with samantha bee, the amber ruffin show, and monologues from colbert and seth meyers), and waiting to watch derry girls until I can handle it emotionally

currently reading: well, the last book book I read was ‘Humankind’ by Rutget Bregman and I fucking loved it, but I’m waiting to start the next one (which I think will be MLK’s ‘Where Do We Go From Here?’) until I finish this class because we have an insane amount of reading every week and I can barely keep up. 

Tagging: (only if you want, obv, and feel free to answer on whatever blog you want) @theartificialdane @optimisticfruitcup @rhododendronprophet @missdandee @opalescent-cheetah @artificialedith @tumble4rpdr @aqalbatross @artificialpuddle @hausofliaison @kitschypixel @puppywritesthings @imalwaysaslutfordrag @laineecope @fab-wolf-in-the-gloom @grinder-lector @purecamp @fannyatrollop

[youareunbearable]

Catch me not having a clue who any of these gods(?) and people are, but still sitting here like, "I ship that pretty one with the gruff one, and that brown haired one with the other(?) gruff one?" without knowing names or what this is except the fanart I see you reblog, because this fandom apparently has lots of nice art

Fam i have no idea what ur talking about or when u sent this im so sorry asfkjhfkjhf but i thiiiinnnkkkk??????? it’s “Heavens Official Blessing” or  Tiān Guān Cì Fú (TGCF for tagging stuff) its originally a chinese gay novel that is soooooooo long by the author  Mo Xiang Tong Xiu (MXTX) who wrote 2 (two?????) other novels that I know of that are also gay historical fantasy but i personally havent actually read TGCF???? im just watching the anime and looking at the wiki and reading fanfics so i have a vague idea whats going on but not really???? so i cant really give a good review BUT i LOVE THE CHARACTERS MXTX WRITES SO MUCH AFHAFKFHKFAKF IM SO SORRY IM SHIT WITH TAGGING SO U HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IM HYPER FIXATING ON BUT

LISTEN

LISTEN 

LISTEN

Pretty one and the gruff one im THINKING is He Xuan (or Ming Yi/ Ming-Xiong/Ming Bro) for the grumpy one and Shi Qingxuan for the pretty one and both are kinda gender fluid?? (more Shi Qingxuan but they both change their forms to be both women and men which is Iconic and the anime put her in the TRANS FLAG COLOUR instead of her canon white and green which is ICONIC) AND THHEYRE SO TRAGIC AND HOT AND I CRY JUST THINKING ABOUT THEIR STORY LIKE AFHDFKJAFDSGS like i want to kinda read the book just for them, the two super minor characters, but i also read somewhere that their story doesn’t really have a clean ending so im also holding back from just getting Emotionally Hurt because im a cancer and i know it’ll wreck me

I think The Two Gruff Idiots are Feng Xin (dark haired gruff boy) and Mu Qing (brown haired gruff boy) and theyre both martial gods and both knew each other for over 800 years and both tried to take care of Actual Human And Heavenly Disaster Xie Lian, failed, and tried to do it again 800 years later but with stupid glasses with moustaches in hopes that Xie Lian cant figure out that they care about him but OOPS Xie Lian does in fact have the braincell of the three of them fajfafjajf 

Heres the link to watch the anime, there are 11 eps rn but it updates every weekend (I dont actually know when but i watch it on sundays) Make sure u have ur ad block on tho lol there is a manga too and the art style is TO DIE FOR like its GORGEOUS but its roughly at the same pace as the anime so eh

Heres where to read the whole thing online, just a warning its BIG AS FUCK like 244? plus extras I think?? 

I’d also recommend MXTX’s other books!

Mo Dao Zu Shi (or Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation/ The Untamed/MDZS) is both a Book as well as an Anime (the whole thing is on youtube) , a Live Action which you can watch on Netflix (look up Untamed, also a warning, the plot is a little different from the book and anime cause of uhhh censorship?? also i guess to make it more live drama friendly, my friends an i binged it and really liked it, but some of the fandom doesn’t), a manga which is not finished I think???? idk im not caught up, and a fucking chinese AUDIO DRAMA LIKE BITCH ITS SO WELL DONE but i have to stop listening sometimes cause like there is a difference between watching/reading characters kiss, and then like just hearing them, i get so embarrassed i have to skip the kissing scenes and god forbid i accidentally click on the smutty extras alfjajlfjalfjaljf u can find it on youtube, i linked the one i listen to but i havent finished it and i don’t think it’s all of it, but you can find other episodes/chapters easily

Its about 1 Dumb Yet So Smart gay/bi man (Wei Wuxian) who honestly tries his fucking best, fucks up everything, dies for over a decade, and then is forcefully brought back to life to solve a murder mystery with the guy who has been in Super Gay Love with him since they were teens (Lan Zhan), a bunch of teens Who Are Just Honestly Here For A Good Time And Yet (Lan Juniors, Jin Ling, and Best Boy Ouyang Zizhen ) while badly hiding his real identity from all the people he knows, including his foster brother (Jiang Cheng) who is out for blood and hunting his ass down with a whip and also Lan Zhan who is travelling with him. Also the Killer. There is a killer on the loose and is willing to murder whoever to keep their secrets. Also Nie Huaisang. I adore him and his brother Nie Mingjue, if there is one bitch u gotta remember from this summary it’s this little twink (he and his brother also have a fucking spin off movie from the live action drama THAT I HAVENT BEEN ABLE TO FIND A ENGLISH SUB VERSION AND ITS BEEN KILLING ME SINCE I STARTED WATCHING THIS SHOW LAST YEAR. GOOGLE GIVE ME MY FAVOURITE TWINK AND HIS BEAR OF A BROTHER HAVING A FUN FAMILY ROAD TRIP!!!!!!!)

My Personal Current Favourite is Scum Villain’s Self Saving System (SVSSS) which is SOOOOOOO FUNNY Like it’s not as popular cause the comic was discontinued, and the anime looks like its from 2005 with the weird 3D animation but its my current comfort media!!! 

Its basically about a spite reading millennial (Shen Yuan) who died after reading a REALLY awful popular cheesy smut harem novel (think like 50 shade series but worse cause the protag had 600 wives) and was forced into the body of a minor but important villain (the protagonist’s teacher, Shen Qingqiu) from the novel who was fated to die with all his limbs cut off and his eyes and tongue plucked out and is told he has to fix the story so its not trash, he reasonably freaks the fuck out and hugs the protagonists (Luo Binghe) thigh so hard he turns him gay without realizing. Sadly, he does have to make sure certain plot points happen, which fucks him over a lot,  and he thinks Luo Binghe still wants to kill him instead of love him cause he has the Emotional Intelligence of a Rock, but its so funny reading about him handling all the awful tropey stuff, like imagine u have to be a character in My Immortal But With Porn?????? without breaking out of character too much?? I wouldn’t be able to handle it ajhakfkfhjfj He also finds out that he’s not the only transmigrator in the novel either, but it doesn’t matter cause theyre both So Fucking Stupid Collectively but everyone would honestly die for the both of them

warning for this story though, the main relationship is a teacher/student relationship, but nothing happens until the student is in his 20s and also kinda not his student anymore cause he’s running hell??? but if that squicks u out i totally understand and offer you to PLEASE still enjoy some of this media, and instead of the BingQiu ship, I offer you the LiuQiu one, where both me and the main character cry over how a beautiful man/fellow immortal lord loves the main character so much that he literally fought every day for 5 years to be by his side and I Think Thats Beautiful and I kinda like this ship more than the main one tbh PLEASE just look at the art for Liu Qingge because i love him so much, he’s like if you took Lan Zhan and Jiang Cheng from MDZS and mashed them into one beautiful man the author is trying to tell me is straight but u take one look at him And Tell Me Otherwise

[issa-me-addy]

to put it simply: if you like anything on this list, we should like... totally be friends/moots

YES THIS IS LONG AND I APOLOGIZE BUT ITS BEEN IN THE BACK OF MY MIND I FELT AS IF I MUST EXPLAIN MYSELF AND MY BLOG FOR BEING A SHITSHOW OF JUST ALL THE THINGS I LIKE

this list is also for my current followers/moots to get to know me and know what to anticipate on my blog from here on out 

i like a lot of things and obvi i post more of some things than others 

but i’m mostly making this to find new friends/blogs to follow

ALSO MUST NOTE: THIS BLOG IS A SAFE SPACE 

I AM HERE FOR ANYONE I WILL ALWAYS RESPOND AND ALWAYS LISTEN AND DO WHAT I CAN TO HELP 

ALSO THIS BLOG DOES NOT TOLERATE ANY TYPE OF ASSHOLES 

I SUPPORT THE LGBTQ COMMUNITY, THE BLM MOVEMENTS, I BELIEVE THAT NOBODY IS ILLEGAL, I AM RESPECTFUL TO ALL BELIEF SYSTEMS, WOMEN ARE AMAZING, TRANSRIGHTS ARE HUMAN RIGHTS, I BOOST POC REPRESENTATION IN MEDIA, 

AND I BELIEVE IN LOVE AND KINDNESS AS THE FOREFRONT OF THIS BLOG AND EVERYTHING I AM. BUT I WILL FUCK UP A TRICKASSBITCH FOR BEING FUCKING RUDE. 

also again, this post is really long i apologize

first and foremost i love the gays

i myself am a little bit gay

ok into the good stuff

DISNEY

like all things Disney, Pixar & select DCOMS

esp hsmtmts one of my many new found obsessions

also i love disneyland (los angeles born and raised baybee) 

i also like rollercoasters in general & universal studios is fun~

im a little into star wars been a slow and steady incline 

Marvel

but mostly

Bucky

Steve

Peter, both Parker & Quill

and the rest of the Guardians

ATLA

Zutara

if u shit on zutara u can go byebye idc if you ship kataang just don’t be a dick about zutara ok? ok.

also u MUST STAN APPA,TOPH,&SUKI

also huru but only pre-mustache 

all the Harry Potter things

but fuck JK Rowling frfr cos shes a nasty ass trifilin ass bitch 

the og hp books 1-7 are honestly the only relevant things shes ever produced

MUSICALS

including but not limited to

anything written by Lin Manuel including 21 Chump Street aka his best work

Heathers

Hadestown

Dear Evan Hansen

Wicked

Waitress 

Newsies

The Last Five Years

Mamma Mia

Beetlejuice

AND MANY MORE

One Direction (yes i know judge me)

but mostly Harry Styles and Fine Line

5sos minus the fandom because theyre problematic as fuck rn! 

pop punk trash

mostly State Champs

Neck Deep

All Time Low

Alex & Jack’s podcast/streamcast

We The Kings

Simple Plan

the list goes on but i’m getting annoying

also artists like

Tori Kelly

Kehlani

P!atd & Brendon

use those artists as genre/vibe reference lol

AND FINALLY SHOWS

i’m currently watching the Marvel TV shows but i can’t binge daredevil for some reason

but i am 100% in love with Mattew Murdock don’t get it twisted

i am SPN trash although i have to rewatch the last few seasons i don’t know wtf is going on anymore

NEW GIRL

NICK MILLER IS THE LOML

himym is up there

yes i’m friends trash idgaf judgey/bad vibes are not acceptable on this blog idc idc

b99

jake & amy are top tier otp

and Rosa’s very important to me

i aspire to be like the Gilmore Girls

except for rory’s probematicness at the end/in the reboot

ONE TREE HILL i will still title it the best show ever its… so good and also just sentimental to me because its the first show my sister and i really watched tg 

also watched like all of Grey’s because my mom was obsessed 

AND honorable mentions to these shows that i finished oh so long ago

BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER 

SMALLVILLE

i <3 the following netflix ogs

One Day At A Time (i havent watched anything since netflix released them tho oop) 

On My Block

The Get Down (i will never forgive you or netflix for letting this show die) 

Lucifer

The Umbrella Academy (even though i don’t remember jack shit about whats going on) 

Disjointed

Stranger Things

The Haunting of Hill House

i got mixed feelings ab ‘You’

started but did not finish

(edit: adding cos how could i forget) TEENWOLF

the 100

vampire diaries

the originals

Jane the Virgin

AND here r some miscellaneous bullshit things i’m into 

i do be sewing my own clothes thats kinda a new hobby though but we fucks it 

i like baking stuff… just cookies and brownies are my favorite thing on the planet 

i play a few instruments (piano, bass, uke & guitar) but i am very not good at any of them and yes i will obnoxiously sing whenever given the chance 

i am semi obsessed with makeup because my older sister is a licensed makeup artist 

which also means i love beauty gurus my current favs are 

kathleen lights

jackie aina 

& the queen herself 

mykie aka glam and gore 

so yes i also like fx makeup and creepy tingz 

another random youtube fav of mine is drawfee 

theyre very funny and wholesome i love them dearly 

AND ALSO i am… definitely a stoner 

100% a stoner 

i love the weeds

but its not a forefront in my personality cos i am much more annoying about several other things 

AND YEAH THATS ME! i think that who i am is compiled of all the things i like, the characters i relate to and the media i let flood my senses on a day to day basis– you feel? 

anyways i hope this actually gets me somewhere instead of just mad annoying all of my followers 

I LOVE YOU ALL PLEASE BE MY FRIEND 

[reeeyachi]

Hey, how are you holding up?

It’s been tough out here. I don’t know how your country is doing in this crisis (and I do hope you’re safe and healthy wherever you are), but it’s just chaotic in here. The effect this pandemic has on me is chaotic.

 I’ve been alone in my apartment since February this year. I couldn’t go home to my family in the province because of quarantine. I’ve stayed indoors since the government issued lockdown protocols last March. I rarely go out to replenish supplies. The sole entertainment I have in here is my internet, and I’ve been consuming it rabidly. I read bad news every single day and hour and minute. I read good news in between. I go to Twitter to checks memes. I go to Tumblr for some ani fix. From time to time I watch funny videos on Youtube and spend time catching up to series I’ve been deferring on Netflix. It’s a mix of everything and more, and lately I’m realizing how unhealthy it’s becoming. It’s as though my brain couldn’t handle everything at once anymore, and out of severe confusion it just shuts down.

 It affects my ability to focus—in work, in writing, in accomplishing simple tasks here at home. It’s awful, so, so fucking awful. At one point I just sat in front of my laptop staring at a blank screen, my hands unable to move, because my brain couldn’t even begin to think of what to do with an empty Powerpoint file. My brain couldn’t even begin to start constructing sentences to fill my WIP Word file. It’s like I’m in a box and I couldn’t step out. It’s painful.

 This is the worst thing that could happen for me. I’m the type of person who takes pride in my ability to create something unconventional. I hate having to limit myself and my thoughts to invisible standards. I find joy in freedom. And being locked up for months now, without anything to watch and observe but the river from across the street and cars passing by, I feel restrained, and it’s beginning to devour creativity whole.

 I might sound like an ungrateful bitch, but having the same thought in mind is making me question my worth. I feel helpless and alone and sick in the brain right now, but I’m still employed, I’m still earning money, I have food to fill my tummy, a small apartment I can call home, and cats and plants to take care of. Should I still complain? Believe me, part of me doesn’t want to think of the negative things. I keep on setting it aside because I keep thinking instead that I’m still privileged to be in a position I am in while facing a pandemic. But that’s the problem. Because the truth is, everything is bad right now. I couldn’t see how I should be having this positive outlook in life when the whole country is crumbling to bits. I couldn’t see how I should be thinking of the good things when people around me, and even myself, only experience the bad.

 Life is hard right now. And I hate how my body is reacting to it. Is this normal? Would it be okay for me to just lay in bed all day and binge-watch anime because I really don’t feel like moving would do me any good, or would it be better if I force my brain to think happy thoughts and work on a fluffy fanfic even though it feels like I’m dying inside?

 I’ve been communicating daily with close friends and family through chat and calls. I know I’m not alone. But, it’s just this feeling; the unending spirals. It’s like I’m being chased by time while I chase an unknown expectation; like I’m running in circles, in a rabbit hole—a dark, limitless rabbit hole with walls that reached the skies. I couldn’t escape. But I do hope this is just caused by this pandemic, this lockdown. I do hope that all will be well after this. I’m still holding on. I’m still coping. Even though it already feels like I’m breaking.

 I hope you’re safe and healthy. Please be strong. Please take heart. Take breaks. Take care of yourself. Drink lots of water, eat vegetables, wash your hands and please, please, please stay away from people outside of your space.

 As for me, I’ll be holding on to my last three braincells until this virus disappears. Thank you for joining me in this helluva ride. It’s been fun so far. You’re one of the reasons why I smile and laugh to myself every waking day. Are you in some sort of a rabbit hole too? I do hope that you’re not. But if you are, I salute your excellent grit and mental stability. You’re doing great. You’re amazing.

 Let’s fight invisible monsters together, yeah!

[katewaliss]

1x1 plot list!

hello girls, gays and theys! my name is crissy, i’m 21, go by she/her pronouns and live in the PST timezone. i am celebrating bullshitting my way through my junior year with ( copious amounts of tequila but also ) make a list of 1x1 ideas / plot bunnies because i need something to do during this Borentine and what better way to spend it then making myself cry with ships! 

i primarily send really long keysmash head cannons through discord and the ims, but i am also down to do replies ( on tumblr or discord ) and ask memes are my most favorite. i am introverted af but very excited abt ships so i really like having rp partners who like want to stay up all night and write and scream with me, so if that sounds like u, come thru! 

if u like any of these please don’t hesitate to shoot me an im! 

also my discord is daddy devito#2918 ( & yes, i do hate myself  )

were starting with mermaids bc i love mermaids

ALSO YES I LIKE OPPOSITE PLOTS DONT @@@@@ ME!!!!!

ALSO ALL OF THESE PLOTS CAN BE GAY! BE GAY DO CRIMES!

i’ve always kind of wanted one based loosely on these pictures x, x, x. im thinking ponyo meets enchanted meets h20 little mermaid AF realness! like maybe hes this lil regular boy high school college student taking pictures and stuff and sees this girl wash up on the shore looking very confused. so he helps her and you know, shes a little hysterical and cant walk very well, takes her into his apartment puts a towel over here bc she like keeps talking abt how shes a mermaid and hes like oh my god shes crazy ahh. she keeps saying her dad is king of the ocean and hes like???? do u have a last name? and the police dont know anything abt her she has no file, no id, no finger print in the database? 

basically the mermaid is staying w the college student in his apartment and he like teaches her what the microwave and the tv is and its very soft  they fall in luv maybe drama he has a girl friend who sucks a lot who is angry abt mermaid girl idk maybe the government realizes and tries to steal her! fun THAT FIRST PIC? MAYBE HE SAVED HER WHEN HE WAS A KID ONCE FROM DROWNING!!! AHHH

alternatively i found these pictures were are in the same vein very aquamarine x, x, x, lifeguard off duty surfing and he gets stuck in a gnarly wave and almost drowns but this mermaid saves his life! and he comes to see her a lot on the beach and they hang out and fall in love he teaches her how to speak english shows her his phone!!! MAYBE THE GOVERNMENT IS ALSO POACHING HER WE LOVE DRAMA

ok last mermaid plot? BUT ITS A SIREN PLOT!!!!!!! these sirens/a siren wipes out this sailors entire ship with the sirens song they all get drowned/eaten .... but plot twist! this one sailor homie lives bc he is DEAF and therefore IMMUNE TO THE SIREN SONG!! so this siren keeps tryna sing at him and its not working and u know they fall in love good stuff MORE POACHES MORE PIRATES MORE GOVERNMENT TRYNA KILL THE AQUATIC AMERICAN BC I LOVE SUFFERING modern or maybe set back in the day???? spicy

anthour or a sculptor that writes a book w a main character or makes a statue and it comes to life and has no perception of human stuff and is like a big alien

also literally all of these plots can be made gay as the flyest bi i ENCOURAGE it!!!! i will play either character in any of them pls tell me which one u like if u like one

pls the clown clown valedictorian plot

ok speaking of giving the gays everything they want

damn i just want a cheesy wlw 1x1 plot where the first girl is a famous celebrity hella spoiled very purse dog paris hilton type and her fancy convertible sports car breaks down smack dab in a small ass hick nowheresville town and this flannel wearing mannerless tomboy mechanic comes to fix her car but rich girl is stuck in town a few days while they order the part she needs for her car bc it’s a small town they don’t have it and they get closer and the celebrity girl is humbled by the town and learns a lot abt the world and herself just ,, good times LISTEN!!!! zendaya and kristine froseth ???? SPICY

ok maybe a period piece lady knight / princess plot where she was personally assignment to the princess but maybe its a whole mulan thing where no one knows the night is a girl and is posing as a man bc women were allowed to be knights and the princess is betrothed to some loser prince once again ill play either

princess body guard plots always smack

ok princess protection program BUT GET THIS instead of that its my boy dmitri who is the heir to the russian throne or some made up european country but theres an assasination attempt so hes told he has to go into witness protection. and this dude or girls dad is head of cia/fbi and dmitri has to pose as a foreign exchange student at y/ns college and be shown around/baby sat by them. they hate eachother. probably bc dmitri is obnoxious and entitled and sleeps w everyone. he was a matthew daddario fc but not that necessary!

cheerleaders on opposite squads who got the sexual tension!!!!

plot based off hollywood the netflix limited series where its 1940s-1950s hollywood and maybe actors falling in love, an actor and a director? OR omg even better an actor falling in love with some sort of stage crew, lighting, camera person............SPICY! 

a beauty / makeup youtube influencer and a pranking rant gaming sort of youtuber and they have to collab and hate it points if its gay

that cliche plot where ur friends older brother is hot

ok kstew / naomi scott .....that is such.....a wave

UGLY BETTY PLOT BITCH!!!!!! REVERSE THE ROLES OR MAKE IT GAY

i saw this gifset of margo robbie and michael b jordan talking abt how they are eachothers celebrity crush and it got my brain turning 

a very whimsical hopeless romantic artist who finds a muse in a no nonsense american college student studying law studying abroad

PERCY JACKSON BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE HUNGER GAMES BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

business man/prodigal son who falls in love with a stripper/escort

harry potter......next gen................please.............scorose............but like can i play ravenclaw soft boy nothing like draco scorpio BUT ALSO ALL THE HP i also really like ocs also BEAUXBATONS DRUMSTRANG ( if anyone wants to help me w a not hogwarts but other wizarding school rp let me know )

not to b cliche but uh....pastors son bad boy plot yes!

alternatively bad girl good boy/girl plot yes! ( can i pls play bad girl seulgi its Dire )

horror until dawn stuff

soul eater? death note? OURAN HIGH SCHOOL HOST CLUB BITCH!!!! ANIME!

the epically cliche popular person failing math and is gonna get kicked off cheer gets tutored by biggest loser in school and only agrees to tutor her in math if she teaches them how to be cool to impress crush (popular persons friend) and they do that, they start to bond, she gives nerd a makeover the whole school falls in love with them and the popular girls real jealous and wHEw

a disgruntled detective whos wife cheated on him with his partner and he drinks everyday (also could b a lady) throws himself into work and this waitress at the diner he works at who is the opposite of him and very sunshiney

OKAY HANNIBAL but like the hannibal is a lady!

superhero x villian plot! spicy maybe theyre exes! or they went to the same super power school? 

SPEAKING OF SUPERHEROS I WANT A MIRACULOUS LADYBUG PLOT RIGHT FUCKING NOW SOMEONE PLAY CHOU TZUYU AS MARINETTE!!!!!!!!!

also every disney plot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i think this will get added to but for now this is the gist HIT ME THE FUCK UP!!!!!!!!!!

[thinenotthee]

Castlevania season 3 was wack

and here’s why (spoilers under the read more)

let me preface with the fact that i really like castlevania and i didn’t hate this season. i was just not vibing with it. am i still very excited for season 4? you bet your ass. i would also like to say that all my knowledge of castlevania comes from the netflix series and like, one youtube video i watched that explains the entire videogame timeline. i won’t really be talking about the games at all, but i thought it worth mentioning

okay, so why i didn’t like castlevania season 3

1. it didn’t feel like castlevania? i mean sure, it had the characters and some locales we’re familiar with, but it felt thematically and tonally different from the previous seasons. my brother argues that this is because dracula is dead so everything is kinda wack rn, which fine, but also that entire thing with saint germain and the portal? what the fuck was that?? why were there droids and shit? this is supposed to be a fun (dark) historical fantasy show. the portal felt like it belonged to a different franchise entirely

2. why were the creators so horny this season? like, i’m just here to watch folks beat up monsters and occasionally i care about the vampire politics (and i care a lot about alucard), i am not here to watch vampire porn. legit spent a good chunk of the last two episodes looking at my phone because i could not watch it. this season really said monsterfucker rights

3. they did?? alucard??? so dirty????? i love this dumb emotionally incompetent vampire so much and now he’s turning into his father? this is not a redemption arc i want to go through. that being said, i don’t think it’s narratively unsound. this is less a problem with the writing and more me being sad and mad about alucard not being able to be happy. i don’t think the transformation is undeserved, i just don’t want to deal with the angst. as a lovely fic writer said on ao3, you gave us bisexual alucard, but at what fuckin cost

those were the 3 big things, but all in all, i’d give it like a 4/10. and if you know me, that’s pretty fuckin low because i’ll make a case for things at least getting a 5/10. i’m curious about what season 4 has to offer, and if trevor and sypha don’t go back to castlevania to recuperate after the disaster that was lindenfeld, thus having to deal with alucard’s trauma (and the bodies outside his door) as well as their own? then what’s the fuckin point, huh? i will write season 4 myself if they mess up this perfect setup

we also stan isaac in this house, and hector is a dumb bitch who got what was coming to him for being a dumb bitch. season 4 prediction is that isaac kills hector and hector thanks him for it

[chcfasher]

okay i am so excited to get to plotting & interacting with all u cuties ! bare with me though , im also trying to study for a quiz i gotta take later tonight . anyways , i’m mia aka your resident masshole reporting for duty . i’m 20 years old ... will be 21 in june ( fingers crossed my Sad ass will be out of q*arentine by then ) . i go by she / her / dumb bitch pronouns & am very much so done talking about myself already . so lets get to my boy asher here who is ... how do you say ? a asshole ? a dirt bag ? a soft baby boi ? if you wanna plot & discord is easier for you shoot me a mssg @ 𝖒𝖌𝖐'𝖘 𝖜𝖍𝖔𝖗𝖊#9789 . lets goooo 💛

𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐋 𝐃𝐄𝐓𝐀𝐈𝐋𝐒

full name: asher james bennett nickname: ash , aj birthday: march 25 , 1996 zodiac: aries hometown: madison , wisconsin ( click here to see his parents house / childhood home ) current residence: los angeles , california ( although he lives in the villa with everyone , before the year away he lived on his own & still owns the home , both because he loves the place and because it gives his family somewhere to go when they come out click here to see his house ) vehicle: 2017 jeep wrangler rubicon in black ( click here ) , 2019 maserati granturismo in red ( click here ) gender: cismale orientation: heterosexual , heteromantic relationship status: single ( it’s complicated ) family: tamara marie bennett-abbott ( mother ) , harrison charles bennett ( father , deceased ) , mason billings abbott ( stepfather ) , bradford sawyer abbott ( brother ) , stephanie anne bennett ( sister )  education: vocational highschool graduating from the culinary program , graduated ucla with a bachelor in management with a minor in food studies occupation: celebrity chef , tv personality  net worth: 19.7m height: 5′11″ weight: 161lbs tattoos: left arm ( x , x ) , right arm ( x , x  , plus the butterfly tattoo jack has ) , right hand ( x ) , right thigh ( x ) , left leg ( x ) criminal record: arrested ( x6 ) - simple assault ( x2 ) , assault and battery ( x1 ) ,  disorderly conduct ( x2 ) , criminal mischief ( x1 ) , criminal trespassing ( x2 ) , minor in possession of alcohol ( x2 ) , drug possession ( x1 ) drugs / alochol / smoking: yes , mostly marijuana though / yes / no moral alignment: chaotic neutral hogwarts house: slytherin theme song: righteous by juice wrld (  a look at his mental health and the way it he attempts to cope ) & i am by james arthur ( deep dives into his view on himself and how outside opinions of him have effected the way he sees himself ) & empty space by james arthur ( instead of being about a girl this really encapsulates how the loss of his father has affected his life ) traits: charismatic , well-intentioned , affectionate , loyal , jocular , reckless , immature , flippant , short-tempered label: politicians son , miscreant , fuck boy , broken bird , mr. misunderstood , mama’s boy , epicure hidden talents: drawing , singing , master at rubiks cube , skilled card counter ( blackjack )

𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐊𝐆𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐃

asher was born just eleven months after his sister stephanie , to at the time lobbyist harrison bennett &  prosecutor tamara bennett . a menace as a child , he made dennis the menace look like a saint , basically . at first his parents hoped this was simply just a phase but as time went on it became very clear that  if it were a phase it was going on for much longer than his parents had hoped . his sister immediately taking on the spot of prodigal daughter , while asher took on the spot of black sheep of the family . this didn’t mean that his parents didn’t absolutely adore both of their children , because they did . both taking on daddy’s little girl & mama’s boy respectively , early on . 

around the time asher was seven both of his parents were up for office , his mother for district attorney & his father for u.s representative from wisconsin . the influx of cameras / eyes on the bennett family mixed with the level of stress both his parents were under completely put asher off from the world of politics . despite being in a family that had generational ties to politics on both sides . during a family appearance asher was captured on camera ( both video & photo ) putting up a piece sign behind his sisters head during a speech his father was giving . 

[ tw: death , suicide , loss of a parent ] when asher was twelve his father went on a boating trip with friend , call it a boys trip if you will . two days into the trip news broke of his father being in a major boating accident where harrison was the only one on the boat & was dead upon being found . it later was confirmed by the coroner that his death was likely a suicide .  the loss of harrison was hard on the entire family , it was easy to say it affected asher heavily having locked himself away in his bedroom for nearly a week only leaving his room to go to the bathroom & grab food that he’d return to his room to eat . later , when he returned to school he was suspended just in that school year three times . it was genuinely the beginning to the incredibly reckless version of asher , that we seen since .

despite his antics he played varsity football as a cornerback & varsity soccer as a midfielder . taking up sports at an early age , it was clear he was a born athlete who genuinely enjoyed a little competition . he also took an interest in culinary , he was very much so that kid standing on a step stool as he helped his parents in the kitchen . this interest turned into him attending a vocational / trade highschool instead of an ordinary public school , like he had in elementary & middle . 

when he was fifteen he started a youtube channel where he posted cook with me videos weekly & vlogged his experience within the culinary program at school .

during highschool his mom started getting serious with a professor at the local university . asher , of course , hated the idea of his mom replacing his dad and it took nearly two years & an engagement for him to actually sit down & listen to his mom about the situation . it wasn’t until then that he realized , mason , was supposed to replace his father ... it was simply his mom not allowing herself to get stuck in one place in life & fall into a spiral . once he actually heard her side he gave the guy a chance . turns out the two have alot in common & get along very well . he’ll never replace his father but he respects him none the less .

before he’d even graduated highschool , asher amassed over 1m subscribers , made appearances on the ellen degeneres show & rachel ray show . this was around the time he realized he wanted to turn his hobby into something more than that & hell he was good enough to do so . when graduation came , he’d already committed to attending ucla as a business major with a minor in food studies . 

soon after graduation he went on the show master chef , finishing as runner up , which was one hell of a feat given he’d been the youngest chef on the show . he enjoyed the experience & recognition the show gave him . 

while at ucla he continued to play football he was so good he was receiving national attention to the point where nfl scouts were looking at him . obviously he was still too young to go into the draft but they let him know , this was something that was more than on the table . it was definitely something he loved hearing but at the end of the day , the nfl was never really the goal for asher . so toward the end of his sophomore season when he was suspended for the rest of the season for getting arrested & charged with drug possession & criminal trespassing he took that as the excuse not to return the sport the following season .

this was not the first time ( we know it was not the last *wink wonk* ) asher was arrested . from the end of his middle school days throughout highschool he’d racked up four arrests . his first one taking place in eighth grade & the only reason the misdemeanor charges actually went through were because his mom asked for them to in hopes that it would scare asher from acting out in such a fashion ever again . unfortunately , his actions were rooted in much more than teen rebellion having never accepting or being able to cope with his father’s passing . the charges & arrests that would follow his mom was able to cover up & kind of bury them . that way word didn’t spread like wildfire about her reckless son .

not even a full year removed from football & he’d accepted a tv show offer from food network . a show called asher’s kitchen a primetime half-hour show where a new chef would come on each week if they beat asher in making a 3-course meal they win bragging rights & $20,000 , if they don’t they go home empty handed . despite the shows constant high ratings asher grew bored of the show & left after only two seasons . the network tried to replace him but quickly learned asher’s personality was what really carried the show .

in 2018 , he went on to open his first ever restaurant the smoking goat an american bistro with an upscale vibe in the heart of los angeles . the place is literally his baby & if you can’t find him you can bet your bottom dollar you’ll find him there . whether it’s catching up with regulars or big name celebrities coming through the doors , or throwing on a chef coat and cooking up some of his very own specials . 

around the time of his restaurant opening he started to let up on the youtube channel & it’s now been nearly two years since he’s uploaded & honestly has no intent on returning to the platform . in asher’s eyes , everything has a term limit & his youtube channels time was up .

𝟐𝟎𝟏𝟗 / 𝐑𝐀𝐃𝐈𝐎 𝐒𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄

the timing of his amsterdam arrest was to say the least , horrific . not only was he in talks with several networks ( fox , cbs , netflix , etc ) to have his own daytime food-focused talk show but his mother was at the beginning stages of her 2020 presidential campaign , which she had since put a halt to and decided to continue on with her tenure as a u.s senator from wisconsin . with the headlines of his arrest spreading like wildfire , the internet resurfaced many of his earlier transgressions , the networks inevitably put a halt to going any further in negotiation & the political realm began to turn their attention to the kind of parent the senator was to have a son so ... out of control ? her opposition questioning how she could run a country if she couldn’t so much as raise a law abiding son .

upon his release from jail he took a jet straight home to wisconsin . with the realization of how much harm he’d done to the bennett reputation he made the personal promise to stay away from the media ( no social media , no tv , nothing ) & be the son the political world expected from a politician . his mother ( who is emulated mostly after laura baker from all american ) nearly begged him not to halt his life as a way of personal punishment for his actions . but after months back home & away from the limelight , asher could see the tides turning back in his moms favor & no big network offer ( and there were quite a few that came his way after the news of his arrest subsided ) could pull him back out into the forefront . 

instead opening his second restaurant bennett’s  , an upscale bar & grill in the capital city of wisconsin . he also began work on a cook book that’s kind of taken on a life of it’s own but he’s yet to be anywhere close to finishing that . 

he has inevitably decided to come back & reunite with the bling ring a year later after his family sat him down & kind of had an intervention with him over his persistence to punish himself . claiming they feel he’s matured & gotten a good grasp on himself & that they don’t think he’ll fall into his bad behaviors again . ( spoiler alert: they’re going to be very wrong about this ... just saying / he’s going to return with the intent of being a better guy , being on the “ right track “ but lets be real it’s going to quickly spiral out of control as per usual ) . 

𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐘

as you can probably tell this boy is no good . he’s the guy your parents warn you about , i swear , he will get you into so much trouble & bask in the glory of being the one to give you such an adrenaline rush . he’s big on being here for a good time & not a long time . he just wants to have fun , at any cost . he’s extremely goofy , the kind of guy to whip out some mediocre wrestling moves on you for the sake of getting attention . he doesn’t take much seriously ... until he does ? what im saying is homeboy has one hell of a short temper and once he’s flipped his fuse , he basically blacks out . the reason for this is because no matter how happy & full of life he’d like to come off he has this deep well of anger that swells in him ever since he lost his dad . also a topic that can get him clenching his jaw , do not under any circumstances bring up harrison bennett . very much so a mama’s boy , though , catch him facetiming his mom once a day to tell her how much he loves her & see how she’s doing . he can come off very uncaring at times , it’s easy to say he’s probably one of the most misunderstood people around . he comes off like a douchebag , like someone who has little regard for others & don’t get me wrong he often is both of those things but he isn’t heartless ? when he has time to sit back and think about the damage he does ... it hits him like a mack truck & he goes into a pretty dark place of feeling like he’s a villain but he wants to be the hero of the story ? not very big on apologizing , verbally . if he says sorry you can bet a smug grin is following behind the words . instead he’s big on buying things & even cooking to show he’s sorry . probably not the best way to go about things but this is asher we’re talking about here . he is a flirt & will fuck anything . that’s all i have to say about that . onto his friends ? whew are his friends his world . he is a big proponent of bros before hoes & is an extremely loyal guy - to his friends . a true ride or die type a guy , he’d help he hide a dead body without any explanation at so what happened . a big move now ask questions later kinda dude .

𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒

BREATHE BY JAMES ARTHUR : he has a soft spot for her . he always has . she’s one of the only girls who doesn’t drool over him , they’ve never hooked up to any extent and that’s due in large part to her telling him from the beginning that the only way she’d give him a chance was if he straightened up his act & proved to her that he was worth her time . if there is a girl out there who can asher for the better , it’s her . but everytime she thinks she’s gotten him on the right path , she catches him either acting out or reverting to his fuck boy ways & getting with girl’s who he doesn’t have to put so much work into .

SAME SQUAD BY P-LO : let’s be real these three originated “saturdays are for the boys” . they’ve been boys for as long as they can remember . if you see one of them around you can rest assured the other two are in the vicinity . they’re the best of friends . they know everything there is to know about each other . all a bit reckless , but that’s what makes them such a fun trio . a very homiesexual bond takes place between these three & nothing & nobody could get between them .

CLOSE FRIENDS BY LIL BABY & GUNNA : they were once good friends , things spiraled past the point of their control , lines got blurred & then they were dating . the relationship as a whole was one no one thought would last . to give them credit things were good at first but after he cheated & she found out from a friend about it things started to go down hill . things only got worse when he was persistent in lying to her about the situation . she inevitably took him back & not too much later the arrest in amsterdam happened . before he was even released from jail , she was sent a video of him & one of his friends talking about sleeping with a prostitute . although it never happened the fact that was his intent was enough for her . his expectation was that because she forgave him before she’d wipe away the pain of him once again not having regard for their relationship & forgive him but she just couldn’t . when he came out to her forwarding the video to him , he decided to ignore the situation completely . the two have not had any contact for nearly a year & never really broke up or spoke about the situation . 

NO FRAUDS BY NICKI MINAJ & DRAKE & LIL WAYNE : the perfect ride or die squad . the media likes to say someone in the trio is dating at any point in time but , that’s just not the case . these three are always getting into something . the true depiction of always having your friends back . they will lie for each other , fight for each other , anything to prove their loyalty to each other .  

i also have some musing posts here , if you want to give that a look !

[imthederpyfox]

Rant About YouTube Copyright.

by imthederpyfox, Moments ago

Journals / Personal

I know nobody's here anymore, hi, nobody~

But I need to take a minute to rant about YouTube's copyright system for a moment.

I know it's come a long way in the past few years, content creators never used to be able to defend their work with copyright under YouTube guidelines, and it's great that they now can. However, there is also the problem that as content creators can fairly and justly claim others videos that include misused content off their own, creators will also claim videos just because they don't like them. AKA 'foodybeauty' and 'Amber-Lynn Reid', to name a few...

Along with this, we also have major companies who think they should copyright any video posted about one of their shows or films or games, or anything really.

Now I know, full re-uploads of these things are against copyright law, well done YouTube, would you like a gold star? Well, guess what, you don't get one. Because not only can they claim these full videos, they have also been going on binges, where as soon as ANY kind of content related to their products comes out, it becomes copyrighted before the content creator can even so much as blink or press save.

I'm talking about videos where you can barely see what the creator's watching, i.e - an UNLISTED video I just posted of a review/reaction to a Netflix show called Haunted.

Now, I have posted another reaction for Riverdale, and spent months trying to figure out the best action to take. Bare in mind, these videos are 'unedited' for my patrons, and the links are only available to my patrons. But guess what? I HAVE NO PATRONS! First of all, HOW do these big companies find an unlisted video? Are they my patrons? I mean that'd be nice, but no. They Aren't.

Second of all, why the fuck would you block an UNLISTED video, when so many people upload full copyrighted re-uploads of films and TV with no issue?

Third of all, how did you even know my video contained any of your program when it's not even named after the show AT ALL because I KNOW you'll copyright it immediately if the title has so much of a WHISPER of the show included.

Now, I will admit, I understand why my first video got copyright claimed - despite being unlisted, which I'm still annoyed about - because most of the screen was taken up by the episode of Riverdale, rather than my reaction. I get it, fine. So, I edit it, I make myself the main focus - ew, I know - and I lower the opacity of the original video, and I cut out any songs that go on for too long, and I make sure that 1/4 of the video isn't even FUCKING VISIBLE!

Safe to say, this is not a re-upload of the original content. This is an upload of a reaction to said content. My reaction, in which I am constantly talking throughout, constantly cutting in, constantly ruining this series for everyone that decides to give me money to watch, what a good YouTuber I am indeed.

So, because I couldn't let sleeping dogs lie when I earned my SECOND COPYRIGHT CLAIM ON THIS UNLISTED PATREON VIDEO! I decided to look more into the company trying to claim it. Was it Netflix? Nope. Was it a TV company? Well, sort of? A french company that distributes TV shows, or so it claims. See what I did there? Good right? No, ok, moving on. So upon my research I happened to come across multiple videos, saying that the company was a scam, that they were fake and shouldn't even be copyrighting things.

SO, what did I do? Well, just to make sure I checked which part of my video was still listed under their 'copyrighted content' thing, because if you check it'll tell you time stamps and give you the option to trim. So, there was about 5-6 minutes of my video that for some reason was still being claimed as copyrighted, so I went in, and edited little bits out, where there was no dialogue, no important things, and then I saved it, and waited for it to process, and then I went into that copyright claims and I said, ya know what? I'm not taking this shit, I worked hard for this video, I made sure to do everything I needed to do, and since these videos fall under fair use due to the cutting and editing and the fact you can't SEE 1/4 OF THE VIDEO, I sent a dispute.

Now I have to admit, I was nervous. If the company that copyright claimed my video didn't like the fact that I'd done that, they could CHOOSE TO COPYRIGHT STRIKE ME. Like, no review from YouTube, nothing like that. If this company didn't like that a tiny channel with only 57 subscribers put in a dispute against them, they might get pissed. They might not like the fact that someone's done that, and they might turn around and say to YouTube, FUCK this channel, bye bye, bitch.

So I was worried to say the least, but I have never been one to back away from bullying, and in this case, I class it as bullying.

I filled in all the relevant details, including a very in depth explanation as to why my video was counted under fair use, and how my channel is tiny, how I don't have any Patrons to see the video, how my video was unlisted, and heavily edited to make sure the copyright did not count against me, including the use of disclaimers in both the video and the description.

I was professional.

I was right.

And I won the dispute.

A day later I get an email telling me the company decided to release my video of all claims and it is now available for all none of my viewers to watch! How exciting, right?

Well, today I decided that I'd upload my second reaction that I'd recorded, I did the same as with the last one, having learned something. I lowered opacity, I covered any nudity, I cut off 1/4 of the video, I made it so the focus would be on my ugly ass mug instead of the TV show itself. And I spent hours trying to upload it for it to fail and me have to do it again.

And low and behold, after all my troubles, all my trials and tribulations, all my blood, sweat and tears and turmoil... I got copyright claimed once again.

Now, it's safe to say, I'm a little bit pissed, ya know?

My video - much like last time - hadn't even fully been uploaded, around the 97% mark, and boom, claim. So I took a deep breath, ya home boi is NOT happy, and I see where exactly it thinks my video is not covered under copyright law. And this is where I think these companies don't care if you are actually covered under the law or not, because it's always a random part of the video, it's always about a 5 minute chunk of the video regardless of what you do.

Which leads me to my next conclusion, in order for these companies to be finding these videos - especially with them being in the unlisted category (needing a specific link to be able to view), and the title not being related, and the video being edited to make sure it isn't eligible for a copyright claim, they MUST have a bot, or a program running that searches YouTube for clips of their content, regardless of how it's presented, or whether it's a review or not.

Which I have to say, is unfair. Especially in the case of the unlisted thing. I know, YouTube can't help it if these companies have bots and programs and code, they can't stop that from happening. But what they can stop? What they SHOULD stop? Is these companies being able to claim videos that aren't even eligible for it.

YouTube, man, you gotta work on this.

We were rooting for you! We were ALL rooting for you!

Anyway, seriously, YouTube really needs to find a way to make sure copyright is fair and just and not maintained by just programs and bots. YouTube, why not create a part of your company that reviews these claims, checks the videos, guarantees that the claims only go to those ACTUALLY abusing the copyright system? Instead of those of us who just want to make fun content for our viewers, who strive to just make good reaction videos? Because that's what they are, REACTION videos. Not re-uploads, not someone else's content.

'Great poets imitate and improve, whereas small ones steal and spoil.'

Give a little back to the people that got you where you are today YouTube. None of these big companies had you raking in money to begin with, it was the little guys, the small content creators who now have millions of viewers, because they enjoy what they do. Well, most of 'em anyway...

Just think about your content creators, rather than appeasing the companies that give you a bit more money. I know they won't, because capitalism rules despite how shit it is.

Is it really a wonder that so many creators are turning to streaming through sites like Twitch.tv instead of uploading to YouTube? Even the other day, on a live stream I was doing myself, me and my friends talked about how much better streaming is, how you don't have to constantly be worried about making sure the video is friendly for 2 year olds. 2 YEAR OLDS SHOULDN'T EVEN BE WATCHING, OK?!

My goal has been to be a YouTuber since I was about 12. I'm now almost 22. That's just under 10 years of my life, where my goal, my one finish line, has been to become a YouTuber. But the more and more things like this happen, the more and more I want to listen to that voice in my head telling me to give it up and go to Twitch, become a streamer, not stress so much about copyright strikes and issues with monitisation, and having such UNREALISTIC goals in order to achieve being monitised and YouTube partner in the first place.

I have edited this video, the parts it told me to, I have made sure to cut out the music bits and make sure it's up to par with copyright based on where they claimed the video. But my issue with sending off this newest in what I assume will be a long line of copyright disputes, because someone, even as small a channel as mine, with my 57 subscribers and my 5 views a video (at a push), has to push back and say 'NO. THIS ISN'T OK.' and not let themselves be pushed around, my issue with this?

The company that claimed the video this time was Netflix itself. And we all know Netflix has money. And Netflix doesn't care if it shuts down a tiny little channel like mine. All my content? All my videos? All views and subs and likes I've somehow managed to accumulate? All gone. Like Thanos snapping his fucking fingers.

Regardless of what I do to make these videos fair use, big companies like this get the final say over them, and as far as they're concerned, us little creators who don't make YouTube money yet, but still hold onto that hope that, maybe, hopefully, one day we will be able to do it, we're the 50% they want to snap and get rid of.

And it'll stay that way for a long time, unless people actually stand up and talk about it. Heck, it'll probably end up staying that way even then, but at least we TRIED.

I have respect for Matpatt, I watched his video explaining the work he and other creators have done in bringing awareness to the higher ups in YouTube, using their platforms to help each other and millions of other creators, people who just want to make other people laugh or forget about their problems for a while, or just upload stupid, 2 minute clips because of inside jokes, or they find it funny, they enjoy doing it.

If we as humans have been taught anything recently during this quarantine, it's that a lot of our societal structures are flawed, some may even say broken. Big companies scam us, use us, and give nothing back in return. If peoples eyes aren't open now, when will they be?

This won't get views. This won't get likes or favourites or shared to other people because of some powerful message.

But maybe one day, someone from YouTube will be randomly scrolling through the internet, and find a random post on a crude fanart website amongst all the sonic and Mario at the Olympic fuck games art, and maybe they'll read it and take note.

But we all know that'll never happen.

So I'm gonna wait for the video to finish saving the changes I made to it, and I'm going to dispute the claim Netflix made against me. And I'm going to anxiously wait to see if I get to continue making content for another day, or whether I get taken down by the snap.

------------

If you made it this far, thanks for listening to my rambling.

I feel strongly about a lot of things, and my friends often tell me that I should post about them, because I have such an... Eloquent way or wording things. Well, I finally decided to, because I need to vent as much as the next asshole. They're right, I AM eloquent!

Seriously though, thank you for reading, I know nobody would have but hey, maybe you're one of the 3 views I get on my YouTube videos!

I am blessed.

With like 50,000 curses going on at once.

Such a time to be alive.

Stay safe, look out for each other, and I may do another rant at some point, because this was fun I guess.

-Exza~

[ageofevermore]

1-96

(1) Do You Sleep With Your Closet Doors Open Or Closed?

it’s a dual sliding door, so usually one sides open. but preferably, both doors are closed. 

(2) Do You Have Freckles?

sometimes in the summer, not often though. 

(3) Can You Whistle?

yes! 

(4) Last Song You Listened To.

well for some reason there’s a guy on my TV singing God Bless The USA

(5) What Is Your Favourite Colour?

purple

(6) Relationship Status.

single because my favorite omegle guy won’t answer me 

(7) What Is The Temperature Right Now?

48F / 9C

(8) Did You Wake Up Cranky?

i woke up wishing i was still asleep

(9) How Many Followers?

835

(10) Zodiac Sign.

Sun: Capricorn, Rising: Aries, Moon: Aquarius 

(11) What Is Your Eye Colour?

brown / hazel 

(12) Take A Vitamin Daily?

no

(13) Do You Sing In The Shower?

obviously, i’m not completely insane

(14) What Books Are You Reading?

whatever fucking book my english class assigned...

(15) Grab The Book Nearest To You, Turn To Page 64, Give Me Line 14.

i literally only have a text book by me and opening it is triggering

(16) Favourite Anime?

i don’t watch anime

(17) Last Person You Cried In Front Of?

my mom...about greys anatomy...but still my mom about christmas and my birthday. i cry alot, but i like REALLY cried about those two topics

(18) Do You Collect Anything?

chapstick, trauma, candles 

(19) What Did You Have For Lunch?

it’s only 10am and i haven’t even thought about breakfast 

(20) Do You Dance In The Car?

yes, and then my mom yells at me because i do nothing “subtly” and the entire car shakes

(21) Favourite Animal?

white siberian tigers, snow leopards, dolphins, and now elephants

(22) Do You Watch The Olympics?

unfortunately. i love gymnastics, but like, i’m not trying to watch men in toboggans and swim caps 

(23) What Time Do You Usually Go To Bed?

anywhere between 12pm and 3am

(24) Are You Wearing Makeup Right Now?

no, i never wear makeup because it makes me look more ugly

(25) Do You Prefer To Swim In A Pool Or The Ocean?

ocean

(26) Favourite Tumblr Blog?

besides my friends i don’t really have a favorite blog, i stick to my circle and don’t venture very far 

(27) Bottled Water Or Tap Water?

bottled. 

(28) What Makes You Happy?

i couldn’t tell you...

(29) Post A Gif Of What You’re Currently Feeling Right Now.

(30) Do You Study Better With Or Without Music?

without, but i always start with it on. it never lasts more then two songs.

(31) Dogs Or Cats?

dogs

(32) If You Were A Crayon What Colour Would You Be?

a shade of purple from the crayola 200 pack

(33) PlayStation Or Xbox.

wii

(34) Would You Swim In The Lake Or Ocean?

ocean

(35) Do You Believe In Magic?

hell mothering fucking year i do baby, lets take that train to hogwarts 

(36) What Colour Shirt Are You Wearing?

its a friends pj crop, so black and white stripped with the central perks logo

(37) Can You Curl Your Tongue?

yup

(38) Do You Save Money Or Spend It?

save money 

(39) Is There Anything Pink Within 10 Feet Of You?

my cup 

(40) Do You Have Any Obsessions Right Now?

stranger things ig

(41) Have You Ever Caught A Butterfly?

no, those assholes scare me, but i’ve grown + released them 

(42) Are You Easily Influenced By Other People?

um chile, i would follow my best friend off a cliff with no hesitation

(43) Do You Have Strange Dreams?

all the fucking time 

(44) Do You Like Going On Airplanes?

ITS MY FAVORITE FORM OF TRAVEL 

(45) Name One Movie That Made You Cry.

the hannah montana movie

(46) Peanuts Or Sunflower Seeds?

peanuts 

(47) If I Handed You A Concert Ticket Right Now, Who Would You Want The Performer To Be?

one direction 

(48) Are You A Picky Eater?

yes 

(49) Are You A Heavy Sleeper?

yes, but it takes me forever to fall asleep 

(50) Do You Fear Thunder / Lightning?

yea, depends on the day and the level of scardy bitch i feel like being 

(51) Do You Like To Read / Write?

i love both 

(52) Do You Like Your Music Loud?

hell yeah, let me feel the beat in my kidneys 

(53) Would You Rather Carve Pumpkins Or Wrap Presents?

carve pumpkins 

(54) Put Your Music On Shuffle, What Is The First Song That Came Up?

no tears left to cry by ag

(55) What Season Are You In Right Now? (Weather)

fall

(56) What Are You Craving Right Now?

a churro + peppermint mocha frap

(57) Post A Screenshot Of Your Tumblr Feed.

(58) What Is Your Gender?

female (she/her)

(59) Coffee Or Tea?

iced coffee / sweet tea

(60) Do You Have Any Homework Right Now? If So, What Is It About?

yeah, i have environmental homework and US I homework and Algebra II homework

(61) What Is Your Sexuality?

bruh, idk 

(62) Do You Make Your Bed In The Morning?

no, that shit’s never made 

(63) Favourite Pokemon?

jigglypuff 

(64) Favourite Social Media?

pintrest 

(65) What’s Your Opinion On Instagram Stories?

they’re okay

(66) Do You Get Homesick?

no. i don’t miss thins very easily, i’m away from home for a week and i have no doubt that i could spend the rest of my life without going back. 

(67) Are You A Virgin?

yes sir

(68) What Shampoo And Conditioner Are You Using Right Now?

idk, some really thick and heavy in hydration set 

(69) If You Were Far From Home And Needed To Sleep For The Night, Would You Choose To Rent A Crappy Motel Room For $60 Or Sleep In Your Car For Free?

sleep in my car, though both options scare me 

(70) Are Both Of Your Blood Parents Still In Your Life?

i have a strained relationship with my bio dad, but unfortunately i still have to associate myself with him a few times a year 

(71)  Whats The Next Movie You Want To See In Theaters?

black widow or spiderman 3, but i’m willing to see anything just take me back! 

(72) Do You Miss Your Ex?

i’ve never had an ex, but i do wish krystian would stop ignoring me. stupid scotland boys 

(73) What Is Your Favourite Quote Right Now?

“friends dont lie”

(74) What Eye Colour Do You Find Sexiest?

green / brown 

(75) Did You Like Swinging As A Child? Do You Still Get Excited When You See A Swing Set?

i loved swinging, but a few years ago it started making me dizzy so i don’t swing very often anymore. but tire swings especially are my shit 

(76) What Was The Last Thing You Ate?

chicken flavored ramen 

(77) What Games Do You Have On Your Phone?

yes 

(78) Would You Give A Homeless Person CPR If They Were Dying? Why Or Why Not?

yeah...because they’re dying and if i have the skills to save them...why wouldn’t i?

(79) Been On The Computer For 5 Hours Straight?

honey, i do full virtual high school. we stan a pandemic (we don’t)

(80) Stalked Someone On A Social Network?

social media stalker is my middle name. not anymore though, i haven’t been asked to find a boy in a while 

(81) Do You Like Meeting New People?

no. i hate it. anxiety city man. 

(82) Do You Wear Rings? If You Do, Take A Picture Of Them.

i don’t wear rings, but i really want to.

(83) Do You Sleep With Your Bedroom Door Open Or Closed?

closed

(84) What Are Three Things You Did Today?

woke up, watched stranger things, made ramen 

(85) What Do You Wear To Bed?

whatever i fall asleep in. 

(86) List All Of Your Different Beauty Products You Have Right Now.

are beauty and skincare the same? because i don’t own much makeup. 

(87) Are You A Day Or Night Person?

i used to be a night person. but this pandemic has hit hard with depression and i’ve become a stay in bed all day person

(88) List All Of Your Video Games On Your Phone, Console Etc.

2048 balls, among us, ball sort puzzle, bubble shooter, bubble sort, color roll 3D, drag n merge, fit and squeeze, hole.io, mario kart, match 3D, nonogram.com, paint the cube, roof rails, solitare, spit, stacky dash, stair run, timber run...

(89) Tell Me About A Dream That You Had And When It Happened.

After my moms fiance died, I had a dream that he was able to come see my fifth grade play (he died just before it happened) and when we were walking out he got into the white car from fast and furious (we watched the movies together) and said he would see me again soon, then he drove off...like talk about weird 

(90) Favourite Soda Drink?

rootbeer 

(91) What Sounds Are Your Favourite?

i like a good clicking sound 

(92) Do You Wear Jeans Or Sweats More?

sweats everyday all day 

(93) How Do You Look Right Now?

like a fucking wreck 

(94) Name Something That Relaxes You.

netflix 

(95) What Tattoo Do You Want?

i want a bunch of little symbols, and i think it would be cute if i got a T for my mom, but i can’t tell her that because she might think i’m going soft and exploit my show of affection (jfc why am i like this lmao)

(96) Favourite YouTuber?

colleen ballinger 

[segenassefa]

3. A Semi-Original List of Things To Do During Quarantine

Niggas all over the timelines are baking banana bread, doing headstands, and making Tik Toks. Yeah it was fun the first few weeks – but now we’re almost four months deep into quarantine and the gworls need some change! A bit of variety. Some pizazz, if you will.

Well, fear not!

I am here to help (as per usual). Digging into the depths of my chicken breast-like brain has been hard, but I’ve done it to compile a list of things to try now that quarantine is dragging along. Some of these you’ve definitely heard before (but they were so good, it was worth mentioning again), some of these you may have considered but never really saw the value in, and some of these seem like I pulled them out of my ass, but I promise, they’re a fun time and definitely worth the try.

Take up a new workout routine now that gyms will probably cease to exist.

I can’t even speak on this one (my record this quarantine has been four days without leaving my bed), but health comes in different forms. Even back in the early stages, one of my favourite things to do was get a coffee and aimlessly walk around downtown – it got me out of the house, it didn’t feel like exercise, and was an excuse to take advantage of the warm weather. Exercise is both important for physical as well as mental health, as cited by a million and one studies, and can break up the monotonous cycles of online shopping, self-loathing, and eating that everyone seems to be trapped in these days. Your options, however, go beyond yoga and walking. Buy some weights or use one of the jars of canned tomatoes you have sitting your pantry (…) and do a weight routine. Go for a run. Climb some stairs. Bring back step aerobics like the bad bitches from the 80s. Ride a bike (Queen’s Quay is really nice, and pretty empty on the weekdays). The other benefit to establishing a good routine now is that you can carry it out through the winter. Maybe not the bike riding part, but you get my point.

Socialize (safely).

           I never understood the obsession with patios until I went to El Jefe a few weeks ago, and it got me thinking about how fun that actually must be when everyone isn’t terrified of getting a virus from the person eating chips and guac two tables over. But! There are alternatives! I know you don’t believe me but there are! Toronto has more parks and green spaces than you’d think, and now is the perfect time to take advantage of them. Connect with nature, friends, and socializing in an environmentally friendly space (throw those White Claw cans in the trash, please) and you and your friends will literally be the peak of ecofeminism. If you’re tired of wearing your crop tops and lashes to the grocery store, picnics and beach days also give you a reason to look cute in public again (and with a mask, you don’t even have to put foundation on the bottom half of your face. #win). Some of my favourite places include Trinity-Bellwood Park and Woodbine Beach. If you have a car (or a lot of patience) Scarborough Bluffs is also definitely worth the commute. I think it’s a game changer that “going out” now means sitting in the grass making small talk, instead of getting hammered in some dark, damp club, but maybe it’s also improvement.

Clear out the clutter that you always tell yourself you’re too busy for.

           I know you see it, bitch. That box of clothes overflowing in the back of your closets. Or the basket of random hair ties, scraps of paper, and pen caps on your shelf. What about when you open social media – Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat, whatever – a see all these random people on your feed that you don’t remember following, much less ever meeting in real life. Quarantine has forced us to retreat to our own spaces, physically, mentally and emotionally, and now more than ever is the best time to reflect and take inventory of what brings you joy and (God forbid we’re in this situation again) what you’d be ok with surrounding yourself with 24/7. It may be hard – times of crisis especially encourage a scarcity mindset instead of an abundance one – but it doesn’t hurt to try and reframe your thinking!

The 3 Restaurant Rule

If you’re anything like me, then you love Uber Eats. Since this virus has stripped the joy of going out to eat from my small and soft hands, we’ve had to find ways to work around this. One of these compromises has been Uber Eats. But that, much like anything else in life, can soon get repetitive (and niggas were clowning me for actually enjoying Swiss Chalet. Fuck y’all.) So, I established some ground rules, one of which being the three-restaurant rule. Do I follow it all the time? No. But knowing that it exists had made trying new foods more like a game. Here’s what you do:

1.     First, pick a type of cuisine (I’m partial to sushi, so we’re going to use that for this example).

2.     Next, really study Uber Eats. Find the best restaurants in your area specializing in that kind of food and pick three restaurants that look the best to you. Another alternative (especially if you’re lucky enough to live downtown where a majority of restaurants are doing take out) would be to curate a list of places on Yelp! I loved doing this when outside was open – it made eating out feel a bit more purposeful, almost like it was for research).

3.     Then, keep a lil list – on your phone, on paper, in your camera roll - wherever. When you’re not in the mood to cook, consult the list, and don’t pick a restaurant twice in a row. Start building up a list of places that you can say you’ve tried. Keep tabs on how you felt about the food to compare it to in-person dining when restaurants re-open, or make it an event with friends. Dress up, get together, crack a bottle of wine (or some beers, or sake, ya know – whatever floats your boat) and make it an event.

The other upside to this is now when people ask me for recommendations, I can give them with confidence instead of bullshitting like I would have before (sorry y’all LOL).

Learn how to do your own personal upkeep.

           It would probably take me ten hands and feet to count the number of videos I’ve seen of nail salons throwing customers out for being black or on the prejudice of race and/or class, or the number of hair salons and stylists who charge extra fees for thickness, length (or lack thereof), or for specific styles and modifications, etc. If you knew me, you know I was devoted to my nail salon. I loved the feeling of getting a full set of acrylics, having all the work done for me, the little burn on my cuticles when they’d slide my hands under the UV light. But in quarantine, a lot of things happened – nail salons closed, I became unemployed, and suddenly, $60 manicures every two weeks were not realistic. YouTube has so many videos on how to do basic self-care - things like cutting or dyeing or braiding your own hair, doing your own nails (whether it be acrylic, gel, even a basic polish manicure), doing your own eyebrows – the possibilities are all there. And, if you get good enough – you can always go ahead and make it your own side hustle (with salons operating at half capacity, the demand for people that do house calls is rapidly increasing). I’ve recently swapped my acrylics for press on nails and let me tell you – game changer. They last just as long, look just as good, and allow me the freedom of talon-like nails without having my bank account scream at me (a post on how I do my faux-acrylics at home coming soon!)

Try to watch something that isn’t reality television.

I know 90 Day Fiancee is that GIRL. And if you’re like me, you tend to get very sucked into YouTuber mukbang drama as well (if anyone wants to discuss Nikocado Avocado with me, I am more than willing). But after a while, it gets kind of repetitive, and there’s no harm in educating yourself on other topics. Netflix, Amazon Prime Video, Hulu, even YouTube all have so many documentaries on a variety of topics – from crime, to health, to cults – there’s literally something for everyone. Plus, there’s something really self-satisfying about learning something on your own. If you need a place to start, my personal favourite is Bikram (Netflix) and any of the Vice documentaries on YouTube, but there are so many, so browse around and find one that suits your personal taste.

           There are also many documentaries on environmentalism and the Black existence/experience/life in America and globally. Considering all the things that are going on right now, it would be wise to educate oneself, especially when the tools for doing so are a few clicks away. My personal favourites are 13 and Who Shot the Sherriff, but there’s so many that you don’t have an excuse not to at least learn SOMETHING.

Severe ties and blame it on the pandemic.

This one is pretty self-explanatory. Maybe there’s the persistent wanna-be friend who you tried to avoid in your Thursday 11-1 lecture and would incessantly text you for notes. Or the creepy guy who would always be in your study spot in Deerfield and message you after with the dumbass eye emojis. Maybe it’s that one friend you used to call to console you of your issues, but by the end of the chat you felt more unnerved than understood. Whomever it is, don’t be afraid to stray away a bit and use the excuse of social distance or “getting your head together” to gradually give yourself some space and make things a bit obvious without having to be a total asshole. It can help, tbh, and the last thing you need in a time like this is to feel guilty for someone else’s feelings.

Be ok with doing nothing.

Life is always on some go,go,go shit. With people posting all those fucking memes about hustling or whatever, it can be easy to feel like you’re sitting in quarantine wasting your life away because you haven’t joined Forex, or OnlyFans, or started three side businesses, or taught yourself a new language or whatever. But listen – look at quarantine like a break. You had a nice long break to re-cooperate and self-indulge a lil bit and you know what? That’s ok! You’re not less of a person because you chose to rest or hang out in bed more than you should have. Don’t let other people’s progress (or lack thereof) be a measure of your own. How can you expect to bounce back after a GLOBAL PANDEMIC if you spent the entire time beating yourself up for not living up to other people’s idea of success? …Exactly. This list is just for fun and personal growth, but realistically, quarantine is for doing whatever the fuck you want (safely and sanely, of course), but literally look at this time off as God, Allah, Buddha, whomever, pumping the brakes on what is a normally hectic life. Slow down, enjoy the small things (ALL the small things), and allow yourself to be what you are – a human being, not a fucking machine.

[medea10]

My Review of Grand Blue

How did I get into this anime? Well, I heard there were some good reviews about this particular title. It was one of those animes I probably should have watched in summer 2018, but more than likely I was watching some sequel no one remembers.

Iori Kitahara just moved to an ocean-front town to live with his uncle since he lives near Izu University (a school Iori was accepted into). His uncle owns a scuba diving shop that serves as a local hangout for members of the school’s diving club. Little does Iori know that this is a local hangout to get FUCKING SHIT-FACED!!!

I am not making this up. These members drink like it’s going out of business. And usually these drinking binges end up with blackouts and public nudity. In Iori’s case, he got so black-out drunk that he woke up in front of his new university’s courtyard…on the first day of school…only wearing his boxers! I’m beginning to see why Amazon put out an advisory at the beginning of each episode about drinking responsibly. But aside from drinking with a bunch of meat-head senpais, there’s also diving. Yeah, club activity is actually diving into the ocean.

So let’s dive into this college-leveled, binge-drinking club as we meet some interesting characters like, a raging otaku (Kouhei), Iori’s cousin with “Permanent Resting Bitch-face Syndrome” (Chisa), a girl who should get a makeup tutorial on Youtube (Aina), two meat-head senpais (Bukki and Tokki), Drinky McStripsItAll (Azusa), and Chisa’s “loving” older sister (Nanaka).

BETWEEN THE SUB AND THE DUB: So this is an Anime Prime exclusive, so I doubt I’d be hearing a dub to this any time soon. The sub has quite the line-up of seiyuus including that upcomer I’ve been raving about all 2019, Yuuma Uchida. But a lot of well-known folks like Kana Asumi and Hiroki Yasumoto (who can literally play anything at this point) shine in this anime. Here’s what you might recognize these folks from.

*Iori is played by Yuuma Uchida (Kyo on Fruits Basket 2019, Uenoyama on Given, Chika on Kono Oto Tomare, Sun on Oresuki, Ash on Banana Fish, and Shirazu on Tokyo Ghoul :re)

*Kouhei is played by Ryouhei Kimura (known for Hinata on Angel Beats, Hachiken on Silver Spoon, Takizawa on Eden of the East, Judar on Magi, Taishi on Tokyo Ghoul, and Hiyori on Free!)

*Chisa is played by Chika Anzai (known for Mina on Attack on Titan)

*Aina is played by Kana Asumi (known for Taneshima on Working!!, Ran on Shugo Chara, Kazakiri on Index, Yuno on Hidamari Sketch, Nagisa on Madoka Magica: Rebellion, and Tachibana on Nisekoi)

FAVORITE CHARACTER: I’m gonna say that after watching all 12 episodes; Aina (a.k.a. Cakey) grew on me. Horrible caked-on make-up aside, let’s be real here.

I think it’s because of the development we see with her ever since she was introduced early in the series. We see a girl trying her damndest to fit in with the tennis club only for it to blow up in her face (literally when we’re talking about all that makeup that’s “caked” on her face). Yeah, these guys treated Aina like garbage! But after joining the diving club, we see her be herself and slowly trust those around her. I think it’s more of this character resonating with me in some sad aspect, but I too feel the pain of trying to fit in or not wanting to let anyone down. Anyways, Cakey is my girl!

Poor dear, I feel your pain.

SHIPPING: So Iori is now a college lad and getting smashed eight ways from Sunday. And I’m sure he’s going to have his own picks of the ladies when he isn’t drinking with an otaku and a bunch of meat-heads.

…Or he can get freaky with his blood cousin!

*eyeball twitch*

ANYWAYS, Chisa has made her point clear with the disgusted face she makes whenever she’s around Iori. But in anime terms, we know that she has that classic tsundere syndrome. So when someone like Aina comes into the picture and Iori sticks up for her, jealousy arrives like a fucking A-bomb! Despite Chisa announcing to a wide, public setting that Iori was her boyfriend (while he was passed-out drunk), nothing too scandalous happened with this. It was just so she could keep creepy boys away. Honestly, I really have no problem if Chisa and Iori hook up. It’s actually better than Chisa being with someone who has an unhealthy obsession with her.

I don’t want to say Nanaka has a thing for her baby sister, but this is getting too borderline Yuru Yuri that I have to say something about it.

I’m pretty sure Aina might be a contender after all Iori has done for her throughout the series. It’s just that she can’t stand all that binge-drinking and getting buck-naked at any moment.

And then there’s wild card Azusa! She’s a flirt! What else can I say about her? She teases Iori every chance she gets. Hell, near the finale she tantalized Iori in sex. Wasn’t sure if she was kidding or if she really meant it! However she did shove a leek up Iori’s ass, but that’s because he was sick.

I swear this is normal behavior.

By the end of the series, we really didn’t get much in terms of full-on hookups. Many misunderstandings have occurred involving word-play. Iori, Kouhei, and their band of geeky friends are still virgins (though one of them came very close to sealing the deal). One of the meat-heads has a girlfriend (did not see that one coming). But on a positive note, Chisa and Iori’s friendship has been pretty steady. I wonder how long that’ll last!

ANIMATION: I gotta say it, the facial expressions on these characters were a laugh-riot. It wasn’t like this was pathetically sad that I have to laugh at it. But more of how expressive these characters got when they have to express hatred or disgust! This is more for comical expense and I happened to like it. It’s like with the anime Prison School, all the facial expressions worked in their favor. This, while out of place some of the time, never fails to make me laugh.

ANIME REFERENCE: While shopping for gear for an upcoming diving expedition, Kouhei came across two suits that would make any old-school otaku squeal.

The suits of Rei Ayanami and Asuka Langley Soryu from Neon Genesis Evangelion in diving suit form. And Kouhei got Chisa and Aina to try them on!

ENDING: At the end of episode 9, the diving club is heading to Okinawa for a special trip that is promised we will never forget. They made sure of that when the anime gives us a two-minute preview of what to look forward to in these final three episodes. Just be warned a lot of things mentioned really didn’t happen. It almost felt like one of those gag previews Gintama is notorious for.

Well Iori, Kouhei, and Aina are going to attempt at getting their divers license so that they can go even further down the ocean. It seemed like all three were doing pretty well when it came to the basics of diving underwater. However, it was quickly noticed by Nanaka that Iori was having trouble keeping water out of his goggles and that could result in immediate failure. So Iori practices all night (with help from Chisa and Aina). However, Iori ended up in some trouble when a patrolling policeman comes upon him in the pool. And Iori spent the rest of the night in the water because he was naked.

Because I’d be concerned if he wasn’t naked!

Well, the next morning, he caught a cold. Then dumbass thinks it’s a good idea to get rid of a cold by drinking vodka.

Because I’d be concerned if he wasn’t drinking!

And as a result he ended up missing his chance for obtaining his diving license. Kouhei and Aina were able to get their licenses. So the big diving expedition of Okinawa is about to commence and Iori has to sit this one out. But he remains hopeful to one day dive with his friends in Okinawa. After all that, the group travels to another spot and get fucking hammered. You all see the theme to this series, right?

But the last few episodes gave us a few moments involving Kouhei and Aina. Kouhei ended up stumbling into this group on accident (much like Iori), but discovered how much fun he had (aside from getting drunk as a skunk night after night). As for Aina, she learned that despite the diving club being full of a bunch of drunken meat-heads, these people care about her (unlike the previous club she belonged to).

So it was a memorable trip.

This was absolutely NOT what I expected when I picked up this anime. I notice Grand Blue being taken place in a cute ocean town and thought it would be just as cute as Tsuritama. But it turned out to be the anime equivelant of Animal House. I can easily tell you that my college years were NOTHING LIKE THIS.

Despite going to school in a state where the drunk-driving rate is sky-high, I did not witness any strange anomalies like arriving on campus and seeing a bunch of drunk, naked lads sprawled across the courtyard.

Now then, I do feel like this series could have focused a little more on diving and oceanography. It felt like the majority of the series involved characters binge-drinking, meat-heads fighting with tennis club members, more binge-drinking, sad geeks never getting laid, studying for a German test where you only get 20%, and drinking more than Sterling Archer. Not so much on the ocean like I would have hoped. And even though Iori gets the short-end of the stick in almost every episode, I do feel bad that he couldn’t join the rest of the club under water in the finale. That felt a little disheartening, but that’s just me. Short answer, I like this anime! If you’re in for a good laugh and are not turned off by all the drinking and nudity, I say go for it.

For what it’s worth, it’s a silly adventure I can see myself rewatching one or two more times. And if you’re interested in watching, Amazon Prime has all 12 episodes available for streaming.

Okay, this was quite the trip! Let’s pick our next Amazon/Netflix/Crunchyroll exclusive anime!

Think Zootopia, but set in high school.

Beastars!

Great choice as I even heard good things from celebrities who don’t normally watch anime.

[superstarjeonghan]

The “Rona” (Entry # 2)

It’s been a while since I’ve written an entry, and let me tell you that there has been a lot of things that happened over the past couple of months. I’ve been having less breakdowns, which is amazing. I’ve also been going out with friends, keeping up with school, spending more time with family (there is actually an unfortunate situation that happened, that led to that instance but I’ll talk more about it later), and surprisingly, I’ve met a couple of people who ended up becoming some of my closest friends.

It’s 2020 now. Which I thought was great, because 2019 was a shit storm (refer to “the_void_entry_1”). Oh, but little did sweet tiny me know that 2020 is far worse. I mean it started out well. I’ve been coming to class regularly (the shear strength that I had to have just to make myself get out of bed is enormous, but I had to do it for the *gags* “learnings”). It was all fun and games, cause the only reason why I attended classes in the first place was to go see my friends and learn something (I guess) to pass the courses. Then out of the blue, I started to like studying again, which is surprising even for me. I got the hang of the lessons, I had answers to engineering problems that I never knew I could do, and I started doing projects and papers days before the submission, which is big because I am a huge procrastinator.

Everything was going well, up until the “rona” showed up. (I call it “rona” short for “corona” please don’t let it confuse you with my friend who is also named Rona, she’s an amazing girl and I adore her, anyway.) Countries and cities all over the world were declaring lockdowns left and right. I thought little of it because I didn’t want another panic attack coming my way, but the situation got bigger and bigger, until our country declared a nationwide lockdown. Grocery stores were packed with people bulk buying canned food, toiletries, and basic necessities, classes were suspended which forced them to do online classes, and streets were guarded heavily with law enforcement officers, soldiers even. First I thought “Online classes, cool. It’s easier to pass the courses when we take online exams because, the internet answers everything!” (yeah I know that’s a shitty thought, but at that time I didn’t know that thousands of people are going to die, and I’m not mentally stable to handle that. Also, the internet does not answer everything, I still had to do manual solving to answer those tests cause the professors made it super hard, I thought I was taking the board exam! *flailing arms angrily*)

As days went by I got super anxious because it finally sunk in that my parents were medical professionals. They need to work. They are required to. I started to worry, but I can’t show that I’m worried because my little siblings are going to worry too. Plus, I’ve always been like the strong independent woman that they’ve come to love but my oh my, this strong independent woman is going to puke because of anxiety. I “tried” to show them that I can handle things in the house when they (parents) are gone. And I told them (little sis and little bro) that everything is going to be okay. “No need to worry.” I say to them as I held back my screams of terror. It’s so damn hard to pretend to be strong in front of your younger sibs! (Panganays rise up!) But we need to do it. I need to do it, because mama raised no bitch.

Stuff about my friends on the other hand went, okay? I guess. I got to hang out a lot with some of them, but my original friend group… Let’s just say that I haven’t had the time to catch up. Not just on stories, but also on studies? Maybe because I’m way behind them now. They’re taking up higher studies while I’m still stuck in my current studies. It’s my fault, though. I am clearly fucked up and I can’t keep up with what society wants students to be in this day and age. I’m a slow learner, I guess. I give up easily, and that I know is true. Long-story-short, I fail a lot of subjects because I lack self-control and I’m dumb as fuck, that’s why I haven’t graduated yet. Now that I think about it, I’ve been studying for 5 years, non-stop. I take classes every semester, even during the summer, I try to enroll for school, and yet… I’m still here. But I guess that’s for another entry.

But, something did happen this year that made it a lot more bearable. Remember the people I said that became some of my closest friends? Well, kids. This is the story about how I met your mothe– (How I Met Your Mother reference!!! I’m so sorry, I’ve been binge watching a shit ton of series to appease the mental breakdown, so please bear with me.) This is the story about how I met the… uh, I don’t know what to call this group, but the group chat name varies from “GYULISANATICS” to “PUSSY GANG”. I’ve met this people online, through stan twitter, and they are one of the funniest people I know. I adore them so much, and I just want to protect them at all costs because they are so precious (even though they are completely savage when it comes to twitter fights). I’m going to talk more about them in a separate entry (I think I’m going to call it “the_gang_entry_3”) because there will be a lot of interesting and hella funny stories to tell about this people. Anyway, I’ve been inactive on stan twitter (on social media in general, like literally the only two apps that I open now are Netflix and YouTube) and I feel like I’m missing a lot. I kind of want to jump in on their conversations but I’m afraid that I wouldn’t know what they’re talking about and I’ll just feel out of place. Like my original friend group (stated in last paragraph).

There was this one time not too long ago, where a feud started on stan twitter where the “gang” was pulled into and everything was in chaos. That time, I was just in bed binge watching “Why R U”. When the last episode ended, I turned on my twitter notifications (I turn off twitter notifications when I’m watching so that annoying notification tab doesn’t pop up) and immediately, my phone started vibrating non-stop. I got notification after notification after notification. So I decided to check stan twitter, and OH. MY. GOODNESS. I didn’t know why my timeline was flooded with selcas (a “selca” is a slang for “self-camera” which originated in South Korea, it is also known as a “selfie”). I checked my DMs and the chat was going crazy. I didn’t understand what was going on so I called a dear friend named Din. I asked her what the heck is happening. Why does my timeline look like that one scene from Spongebob where all the tiny Spongebobs in his brain were running around, panicking, and everything else is on fire? She calmly explained it and told me everything. Sparing no details. That one and a half hour conversation was full of opinions on who we needed to side with. At that time, I really wasn’t sure on whose side I’m on, because everything was still so confusing for me even though Din tried to explain and re-explain everything when I tried to ask questions (and they were a lot, sorry Din.) At that time, the mother in me really wanted to say something, like give advice or tell them that everything is going to be okay, and that they don’t need to listen/mind the people that show them hate (which I know they already knew, because they are strong women as well). But I couldn’t, and I don’t know why. A part of me thought that maybe the thing that I’m about to say is going to rub off in a bad way? Or maybe they’ll think that I’m just being active because of the fact that there is a fight going on and I’m just in it for the “tea”. So I didn’t say anything. Even though I told them that I was going to say something. Now I don’t know if they’ll ever get to know the reason why.

This fucking lockdown got me so fucked up that I’m overthinking the littlest of things.

Well, that’s it for entry 2. I’ll write again soon.

Lastly, I do hope that help is given to the people who need it the most. And remember that it’s okay to not feel okay amidst these series of unfortunate events. There are always people out there who can listen to you… who can help you. Don’t be afraid to reach out.

(I haven’t proofread this entry so if there are any mistakes, I’m sorry. Lol)