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mypearlsareclutched · 2 months ago

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We're Sinking Into The Sand

High By The Beach | Chapter Eleven

Modern!Aegon II x Original Female Character, Modern!Aemond x Original Female Character

After the chaos that was Viserys' funeral, Mila heads back to Old Town to help the Targaryen she loves. But it was Aemond who brought her and Aegon together, will it be him who tears them apart?

BTDubs this was where I was originally planning on ending the series but I had SO MUCH MORE TO SAY about Mila and the Targs and ole Creggie and the homies. So (as you can tell from the masterlist) there are a further six chapter coming after this mwah. Also I updated hella quick, huh? Who's proud of me <3

Song inspiration | High By The Beach, Lana Del Rey

CW//TW: Sexual Content (MDNI, 18+), smut, angst, joking at an inappropriate time Aegon style, Old Town and the beach house, drugs, mentions of addictions, HELLA angst at the end, British lingo, morning sex, passionate missionary yuh, consent is sexy, Aegon is OOC in that respect, enjoy the good vibes while they last because I'm here to hurt your feelings <\3

Word count | 5.2k

previous chapter // next chapter

It took almost a whole day to drive back to Old Town. Which was good time. She drove like a bat out of hell, never stopping. Except for traffic lights, because having the police on her ass was not in the cards. By the time she arrived to her destination, the sun was falling down in the sky once again.

Parking Laena's car in the driveway of the Old Town beach house, Mila breathes out a sigh she didn't realize she had been holding in her lungs since leaving the Targaryen home.

Just the sight of the house relieved tension inside her very bones, the smell of the sea air drifting through the open windows and the sound of seagulls flying high above all made her feel like a weight was lifted off of her shoulders.

Another car was parked beside the house, expensive looking and clearly the car Aegon had stolen from Viserys' garage. Mila walked past it to the house, holding the front door's handle with shaky hands.

The house is unlocked, the keys discarded on the table near the door, next to Aegon's alien sunglasses. He must be here.

"Aegon?" Mila calls out, stepping into the entryway.

The house is silent, save for the ticking of the grandfather clock against the far wall. No lights have been turned on, the room is shadowy and painted with strips of sunlight from the surrounding windows. A small sliver of darkness catches Mila's eye, and she crouches down to pick up a black tie.

A pair of sandy, black dress shoes lie a few feet away, the discarded garments leading a bread crumb trail right to the bedroom. Mila stands, walking to the door in search of the MIA Targaryen. A relieved sigh leaves her when she sees him.

He's lying on the bed, legs splayed out over the edge and eyes closed. His black suit from the funeral is still in tact, save for the tie and his shoes.

"Hey-"

"Seven hells!" Aegon exclaims, sitting up. His wide eyes blink at her, before he exhales out a laugh, "Jesus, Em, you scared the shit out of me."

Mila laughs as she shakes her head, her own spirits lifting as she looks at his smiling face, a much prefered alternative to the grimace he wore during his father's funeral.

"So, you took a page out of my book and fled the Targaryen prison?" He asks, standing up.

"Yeah, and Otto is going to drag you by your short and curlies right back there." Mila shakes her head, smoothing her hands over the crinkled black dress she still wore.

"Let him try." Aegon chuckles, "I can disappear if I want to."

He wraps his arm around her waist, pressing his lips to hers in a passionate yet gentle kiss. Mila sinks into it, letting out a please hum as he licks along her lower lip.

The kiss grows heated, and Aegon's hands are quick to wrap around her and pick her up, spinning her around to deposit her on the bed. Mila's legs open automatically to welcome him in, his weight a comforting presence against her sore body. Soft hands run through her hair, over her thighs. Chapped lips run along her neck.

Aemond's hands... Aemond's mouth...

"Baby, stop." Mila says softly, guilt wracking her body as she pushes him away gently. Aegon's face falls, but not from disappointment. Concern is evident on his cherubic features, his hands leaving her as he sits up and looks at her worriedly.

"What's wrong? We don't have to if you don't want to-"

"I fucked Aemond." Mila bites out, closing her eyes.

Aegon is silent, and her stomach drops. He blinks at her, and she can see his mind processing what she just said.

"Oh." He says, voice soft and robotic.

"Aegon-"

"Okay."

"What?"

"I said okay." He shrugs, lying back down on the bed, "That's fine, it's your body, babe."

"Aeg-"

"I don't want to talk about it." Aegon sighs, one hand coming to cover his eyes, as his other hand takes hers. Mila looks down at their clasped fingers, squeezing his hand.

"I'm so sorry."

"Hey, shh." He sits up, eyes once again soft and face warm again, taking her hands in his, "I'm not mad at you, baby. I would never be. This shit is complicated. I just... don't want to hear the details. It'll make me want to cut open my stomach and pull out all my internal organs.

"I wouldn't tell you." She smiles weakly, reaching a hand up to move a stray strand of his hair out of his eyes, "It meant nothing, really. It was just... a moment of weakness. I got too caught up in who I wanted him to be, instead of who he really is. I want you, for who you really are."

Aegon smiles sadly, "If you saw me for who I really am, you would run for the hills."

"Maybe I'll surprise you."

"All you do is surprise me." Aegon laughs, nosing at her hand as it fiddles with his shoulder-length hair, "Wherever you were yesterday doesn't matter to me. I'm just glad you're here now, with me. I really do love you, Em. So much."

"I love you, too." Mila reaches a hand up and cups his cheek, his face leaning in to hers, "Otto is still going to come for you."

Aegon is silent, his head lifting so he can look over at the ocean through the window panes. The sun has begun to set, casting the bedroom in a hue of blush pink and burnt orange. A far away look forms in Aegon's blue eyes, a small crinkle appearing between his pale brows as he thinks.

"What's going on in that head of yours?" Mila asks, prodding his temple playfully.

Aegon sighs, looking at her, "Suicide pact?"

"Aegon."

"So that's a firm 'no' on the suicide pact?"

"I need you to take this seriously." Mila says, taking his chin in between her thumb and forefinger.

"I am." Aegon says as smiles, taking her hands in his, "I'm taking this seriously."

"This?" Mila laughs, confused.

"This. You and me. This. Us." Aegon smiles, rubbing his thumb over the back of her hand.

"Us?"

"Us."

The next morning, as the sun rose over Old Town, Mila woke up encased in the warm arms of Aegon Targaryen.

She slept like the dead, immediately falling into the land of dreams after Aegon had helped her get out of her dress. He grimaced at it, throwing it in the bin, waving away Mila's complaints.

"You look better in the crappy clothes we got from big Tesco anyway." He grins, tossing her an oversized shirt with the words 'Straight Outta Old Town' written on the back. She rolled her eyes with a smile of her own as she put it on, laughing at Aegon's ogling as he removed his own clothes and threw on some joggers.

The second her head hit the pillow, and Aegon wrapped around her from behind, Mila was out like a light.

When the sun rose, she never wanted to leave this room again.

Aegon murmurs sleepily behind her, offering a quiet 'good morning' when he realises she is awake. Mila hums back, turning around in his arms. He gives her a dopey grin, eyes barely open. She returns his smile, reaching her hand up to trace along his face from his eyebrow, down his nose, and across his jaw. When Mila's fingers dance across the skin of his lips, Aegon purses his lips to kiss her finger tips.

She leans in for a kiss first, and he meets her halfway. Their lips meet in a loving dance, noses brushing and hands grasping onto whatever was in reach.

In an instant, Aegon rolls on top of her, kissing her feverishly as he covers Mila's body with his own. Her thighs open for him to lie in between them, flushes skin pressing against one another.

"Is this okay?" Aegon asks softly, desperate to feel more of her but unwilling to go beyond her boundaries.

"More than okay." Mila affirms, leaning up to kiss him again. He groans against her lips, his hands continuing their exploration as his hips buck against her one.

The hot tip of him presses against her wetness, and they gasp into each other's mouths. Aegon shifts forward, slowly fucking into her as she mewls against him, throwing her head back at his familiar, euphoric size.

"That's it, baby." Aegon murmurs, pressing his face into her neck as he begins thrusting into her sensually, dragging his hips back and forward in slow, loving strokes, "Fuck... feels so good."

"Aegon..." Mila moans out, running her hands over his hair and kissing his temple, "I love you."

"I love you too... so much..." His words trail off as his speed increases, fucking her in earnest. The sound of Mila's breathy whines and Aegon's grunts fill the room, mixed with the sounds of skin meeting skin.

Mila's orgasm creeps up on her, making her body jolt as a loud moan leaves her parted lips. Feeling her tighten around him, Aegon speeds up, breathing out curses and praises.

"You feel so good, baby, fuck!" He grits out around clenched teeth, grabbing the back of her knees to press her thighs to her chest, opening her wider. Mila gasps as he fucks her harder, hips pistoning into her with passion yet great care. Her peak subsides, and her body trembles with overstimulation.

"Aegon, fuck... 's too much..." Her eyes roll back, her hands weakly gripping onto the sheets below her and the pale, soft skin of Aegon's thigh.

"Doing so well for me, doll. Making me feel so fucking good. I can feel you getting tighter, wanna feel you cum again. You can give me another, right baby?"

"M-hm!" Mila bites her lip, words leaving her as Aegon angles his

"Right there? That feel good? Fuck, look at you." He praises, his eyes trained on her writhing body below him, "Come on, baby, need to feel you cum again. Please, baby."

"Aegon, fuck!" Mila shrieks, shaking uncontrollably as her legs tighten, her cunt gushing around him as he pushes her over the edge again.

The feeling sends Aegon over the edge, his pace faltering until he shudders and thrusts into her as far as he can go, painting her walls with his spend. Eyes rolled back, Aegon mumbles praises and promises and recites Mila's name like a prayer as his cock throbs, releasing all he has into her soft heat.

The Stark below him feels boneless and content, her knees still pressed to her chest and her cunt still full of Aegon's softening cock, her walls trying to push him out as she moans softly in overstimulation.

When he finally pulls out, both of their releases leak out of her, making Aegon groan at the sight, "Fucking beautiful."

Mila smiles sleepily, eyes blurry. She winces when she stretches her legs out, her hips and thighs burning.

"I'll be right back, Em." Aegon says softly, kissing her knee before rising off of the bed.

As hus weight disappears, Mila whines as she waves her hand to try to stop him. His tired chuckle makes her heart flutter, and after a minute he returns. A cold rag presses against her inner thighs, cleaning the mess they had made. Aegon's hands are gentle as he soothes her aching muscles, pressing kisses against her flushed skin.

"Sit up, baby." Aegon softly orders, and Mila rises slowly onto her elbows. The cold feeling glass presses against her lips, and she swallows down the offered water.

Satisfied that she's clean and hydrated, Aegon kisses her forehead before getting up again, putting the empty glass and soiled rag in the adjoining bathroom.

"I'm going to have one hell of a time trying to walk later." Mila smiles, dazed. Her eyes follow Aegon as he enters the room again.

"Oh, so you think you're leaving this room?" Aegon asks with a mischievous grin, diving back into the bed atop a laughing Mila.

The next day, Aegon drags her along an unfamiliar street. It's old, all ancient cobblestone walkways and winding alleys covered in ivy.

"Woah, Aeg, chill." Mila finds herself laughing, gripping onto Aegon's hand as he pulls her along like an overexcited puppy.

"Come on, we're almost there!" Aegon says, a beaming smile across his face.

Mila had never been to Honeyholt before. She had woken up this morning to Aegon laying on top of her, his chin against her sternum as he watched her sleep.

"Creep." Mila murmurs, a smile on her lips. Aegon huffs, rolling his eyes with his own cheeky grin as he presses a kiss to her collarbone and stands up.

"Come on, lazy, we've got things to do."

"Lazy? You're the one who twisted me up like a pretzel from dawn to dusk yesterday, no wonder I'm tired." Mila laughs, exasperated as she fluffs up her pillow and gets cozy again, "Also, what things? I don't know if I have the energy to do that last thing we did again."

"As much fun as that was, no. We have more fun things to do." He says as he pulls on his jeans, searching the room for a clean shirt.

"What's more fun than a sixty-nine bridge?"

"If you want the answer to that age old question, you should get your perky ass out of bed." Aegon wiggles his eyebrows as he tosses her a shirt.

Honeyholt was beautiful. Cultural, historic, full of tiny shops and homes. They pass smiling faces around every corner, including a flock of old ladies who chuckle as Aegon drags Mila down the street towards the unknown location.

Out of breath from running and laughing, Mila is grateful for when Aegon halts with an enthusiastic, 'Ah!'

She tosses her windswept curls over her shoulder as she watches Aegon walk into an old shop, dusty and seemingly disused. When he realises she is not following him, he pops his head out the doorway.

"Come on, then!" He calls, beckoning her forwards.

Mila laughs as she follows him in, her jaw dropping when she gets a good look at the place.

It had long been abandoned, cobwebs and dust covering most surfaces and furniture. But underneath the years of misuse, was a work of art. Antique chairs and tables dotted around, dark wooden floors covered in floral rugs. The wallpaper was peeling, and some mould had begun to grow, but the dark coloured spirals of the painted paper remained vivid. Along the back wall were ancient bookcases, and dirty chandeliers were hung from the ceiling.

Aegon bounces around the room, picking up fallen chairs in his wake before he leans against a fireplace across the room, looking at her for her reaction.

"What is this place?" Mila asks in awe, eyes wide with wonder as she walks around the small yet beautiful shop.

"It's just some old litt place. It was like a cafe or something until the lady who runs it, you know, bit the dust."

Mila rolls her eyes at his candidness, running her fingers along the dusty bookshelves that lined the far wall, "It's beautiful here."

"And cheap, too." Aegon comments, walking over to her to wrap his arms around her waist from behind, "The old owners son wants to get rid of it so the price is beyond reasonable."

"You're thinking of running a cafe? Aw, will you wear a frilly little apron while you're at it? You'll look so cute." Mila jokes, turning around in his embrace to kiss along his jaw.

Aegon rolls his eyes, but his smile never falters, "It doesn't have to be a cafe, dumbass. It could be anything we want once we buy it."

Mila stops, looking up at him with wide eyes, "Once we what?"

"Buy it." He says, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "I'm thinking bookshop in the front, tattoo parlour in the back. Our own little haven."

"That's absolutely crazy." Mila laughs, wrapping her arms around his neck, "You're crazy."

"You love it." Aegon smiles as he leans in to kiss her.

"I love you, you crazy Targaryen."

They stayed like that for a while, standing in the cramped and dirtied room of a shop that promised a future for them both.

They had stopped off to get petrol on the way back from Honeyholt, when Aegon's phone began to ring.

Mila was paying inside the station, chatting idly to the woman behind the counter. Leaning against the car, Aegon watches her with a small smile, studying the movement of her lips as she spoke, and they way her eyes lit up when she laughed.

His phone ringing caught him off guard. Looking around, he noticed it lying in the back seat where he had flung it over his shoulder on the way here the night of Viserys' funeral. Helaena had given it back to him, chastising him ever so gently for leaving Weirwood without any of his belongings.

Grabbing it, he looks down at the caller ID, a groan escaping him as he rolls his eyes at the name.

"Piss off." He sighs into the phone.

"Hello to you to." Aemond scoffs, voice already sounding annoyed, "Is she there?"

"Who?"

"Hilarious. My fucking girlfriend."

"Which girlfriend? The hot one, or the dinosaur? Oh, wait, the hot one abandoned you after pity fucking you and came back to me."

"...So she is there."

"...No."

"Aegon." Aemond sighs, his rings knocking together as he seemingly runs a hand over his face, "Stop being childish for five minutes, and listen to me."

The older brother laughs, "Listen to you? What could you possibly say to me right now that won't make me hurl this phone into the sea?"

"What did you buy?"

"Should have bought condoms the way this is going." Aegon chuckles, eyes flicking to Mila once again.

"No, Aegon." Aemond's voice takes a dangerous tone, "What did you buy? On your way back to Old Town."

Aegon's blood runs cold, ice water in his veins. He swallows, turning around, as if looking in Mila's direction suddenly hurt to do, "How the fuck did you know?"

"You forget that I've known you all my life, and how you operate as a scumbag junkie for almost two decades." Aemond laughs cruelly, the sound prickling Aegon's eardrums like needles.

"I haven't done anything." He emphasises, "I wasn't going to-"

"Yes you were. If Mila hadn't turned up when she did you would already be stoned beyond human capabilities, possibly even dead. Now, wouldn't that be a shame."

"What the fuck do you want, Aemond?!"

"For you to end things with her."

"Then you are out of your goddamn mind." Aegon bites, knuckles going white around the phone as he grips onto it, "I won't. You can't make me."

"I'm not going to make you, Aegon." His brother chuckles humorlessly, "You've proved time and time again that you won't listen to a single thing we ask of you, even when we try to help you. But it's not you I want to help, not now."

"What the fuck do you mean by that?"

"I mean, Mila should not be around a bad influence like you, Aegon. She's a recovering addict. She's unstable, and delicate right now. And she's going to relapse if she's around you."

"She won't-"

"But she will. Because you will." Aemond explains, simply as if he were educating a child, "You've been down this road far too many times, brother. You will go back to your vices the second things get too hard. Mila stopped you from getting high this time, but at some point, the thrill of being with her will wear off for you. As it always does."

"She's different."

"Oh they were all different to you!" Yells Aemond, startling Aegon into docile silence, "It's all different until it's mundane. Until you get used to those feelings she inspires within you. Then you'll go back to drinking, or to snorting, or injecting, until it's fucking. It'll be all of those and she won't be able to handle it, Aegon. She will relapse."

Aegon flinches, his hands twitching as he takes a shuddered breath, feeling his heart crack at the thought, "I wouldn't do that to her."

"You wouldn't try to, Aegon." Aemond says, his voice softer now, "But you can't protect her from yourself."

It's silent. Aegon swallows this information like a bitter pill. It leaves an aftertaste like bile in his dry mouth, his heart beating like the hooves of a racehorse and his stomach twisting into knots.

Because he's right, a voice whispers inside his head. You are beyond saving. No matter how many times you try, you always go back to your wicked ways. Can you live with yourself? When you poison her, like a spec of black dye in a basin full of crystal clear water? You will ruin her, because that is what you always do.

It is almost like Aegon can hear Aemond reeling back for the final punch, his brother's voice like a siren's when he states...

"Mila deserves better than you."

A blow to the gut, because it is true. Aegon knew it from the second he met her, from the second he saw her smile and heard her laugh. She was good and she was kind and Aegon will kill her.

"Rot in all of the seven hells, brother." Aegon bites out, ending the call. He takes a shaky breath, blinking away tears he hadn't realised had formed. He throws his phone as far as he can, watching it flicker with light reflected by the sun before it disappears into the long grass.

Turning in place, he watches as Mila waves goodbye to the shop clerk, smiling to herself as she walks out the station and heads his way.

If only he felt the contentment she feels. But all he feels is sick.

Mila knew something was wrong the second they got in the car. Aegon wouldn't respond to anything she said, except a few hums and one-worded answers. His smile had vanished, the light in his eyes dimmed.

It broke her heart, because she had no idea what could have caused it.

When they finally got to the beach house, Aegon disappeared inside, walking on autopilot like a ghost. Mila watched him with wary eyes, biting the skin around her gnarled thumb nail.

Inside, he was nowhere to be seen. The taunting ticking of the grandfather clock was the only noise that greeted her, and she glared at it as she walked past, heading towards the bedroom.

Aegon was standing beside the bed, looking down at the rumpled sheets with a frown.

"Aeg?" Mila says softly, standing in the doorway. The room felt cold, the beginnings of winter making the overall temperature drop, but an icy chill surrounded Aegon.

"You need to go." He says, voice quiet.

Mila freezes, staring at him with furrowed brows, "Huh?"

He sighs, rubbing his hands over his face, groaning against his palms.

"I need you to go. You can't be here anymore." With a shrug, he finally looks at her, face emotionless and eyes stony.

Standing before her, was the Aegon she never met. Something in him had changed, switched gears inside his head. His entire aura became somber, uninspired... broken.

Looking into his dulled eyes, Mila took a step forwards. But he took a step back, working his jaw as he flexed and unflexed his hands beside him.

"Aegon... I don't understand what you're saying." Mila pleads, hoping to the old gods and the new that he's not saying what he .

"We can't be together." He shrugs, "Aemond was right. I'm going to fall back into old patterns, and when that happens, it's going to fuck you up. Worse than Aemond did. I'm not good for you."

"It was Aemond on the phone wasn't it?" Mila chokes on a bitter laugh, looking up to the ceiling as she runs her hands through her hair, "I saw you talking on the phone. Aegon, baby, please, let's just talk this through."

"You're wasted on me." He mutters to himself, "You should get out while you still can, before I make you worse."

"All you've done is make me better, Aeg." Mila insists as she takes another step closer to him.

Hearing her insistence, Aegon stares off into the distance, his face hardening while his eyes remain shining with unshed tears.

"Quick question." Aegon says, his voice turning cruelly playful, "Did Aemond tell you to come here when he was balls deep inside you or was it kind of like a pillow talk conversation afterwards?"

Shocked by his impersonal voice and crude statement, Mila is take aback, a shiver running down her spine, "Aegon-"

"No, no, don't answer that." Aegon waves his hands, "I'm sure it doesn't matter."

"It's different with you. All of it is different. What I have with you is so much realer than what I ever had with him."

Aegon scoffs.

"Aegon, I want this. I want us. We can do this."

"We can't." Aegon chuckles, "Because Aemond was right. At the end of the day, you're going to go back to him and I'm going to go back to all of the other shit."

"No, you're not, Aegon. You're not-"

"Will you stick by me?" Aegon asks, his voice taking a taunting tone, "When I come home drunk or high or smelling like some other pussy would you just sit back and forgive me?"

"You're not going to do that, you're doing so much better, you wouldn't-"

"No? I wouldn't? What's this then?" Aegon stomps over to the bedside table, opening the drawer hard enough to send it clattering to the floor. Various items scatter against the faded carpet, but one item in particular makes Mila's heart stop.

A ziplock bag full of various coloured pills and powder filled baggies, "You didn't...."

"Oh yes I did, baby. Stopped round an old buddies house the night after the funeral. Got all the best flavours here; LSD, ket, some molly too, I know you love that... ooh, and some crystal, didn't even realise that was in there-!"

"Stop it." Mila says, trying to keep her voice level though it shakes.

"Ah, come on, baby. Let's have a little fun, eh?" He taunts, shaking the bag in her face, "We both know I will, so are you just going to sit pretty and watch me?"

"Why are you being like this?" Mila yells, frustration building as she watches the man she's loved turn into the nightmarish, fictitious man Aemond warned her about.

"So boring." Aegon groans dramatically, flinging the bag away across the room, "I'll go back to one of my addictions, doll, so pick one. Maybe you would prefer it if I did what my brother did, hm? What if I found myself my own Alys Rivers? Some hot, older lady that I can stick my dick into every time I get sick of you. Maybe I was too quick to judge my dear brother. If I had you on my ass every second of every day I'm sure I would also be dying for some other cunt-"

Aegon is silenced as his head whips to the side, Mila's palm stings as it lingers in the air.

She slapped him. She can't believe it for a second, too shocked

Mila stumbles back, cradling her hand to her chest as sobs wrack her body.

He watches her, cheek slightly red from where her hand struck him, his eyes glassy with unshed tears.

"You're right, Aegon." Mila sobs, "We can't be together."

Though she fully intended to drive away, Mila sat in Laena's car, suddenly struck with an uncertainty of where she would go.

Her apartment in Kings Landing was stained with memories of Aemond, every item of furniture lines with scars where he once sat, stood, lay. Mila used to think fondly about how his cologne could be smelt in the air, on her blankets and on her couch cushions, but now the thought of smelling his scent turned her stomach.

It no longer felt like the comforting aroma of the man she loved, but the scent of a man who claimed her, used her, broke her.

She could go to Cregan's. Or Baela's, or back to Dragonstone where Rhaenyra would always wait with open arms.

But the beauty of Old Town boiled down to its distance. The distance from King's Landing and all the sordid experiences Mila had there that haunted her past. The parties, the clubs, the bars. The drinks, the drugs, the men, the women, the people whose genders mattered not to her in the moments where their lips touched. All the nights spent drifting from reality with magic in her veins, the mornings crashing back down to the real world in fits of sweating and throwing up the contents of her stomach.

The year where she made new memories no longer wrapped in a drunken haze, were ones she made by Aemond Targaryen's side.

Mila could not go back to King's Landing, because the ghosts will be waiting for her.

But she could go to another haunted place.

Pulling out the pay-as-you-go phone, she dialed Baela's number. The sound of her best friend's soft voice greeting her made her feverish skin cool a bit, "Hi, gorgeous. Are you okay? Mom told me you borrowed her car and left the city."

"Yeah, I needed to get away, needed to talk to Aegon." Mila says, her voice thick with her tears.

She can hear Baela sit up straight in her chair, her voice taking a concerned lilt, "Mila? What's wrong? Talk to me."

"It doesn't matter." Sighs the Stark girl, "I'm going home."

"Okay, babe. Do you want me to set up my sofa so you can sleep on it?"

"No, Bae. I'm going home."

It's silent on the other end for a moment, seagulls caw in the near distance, and another tea tracks a warm trail down Mila's face.

"Holy shit... really?" Baela asks in a soft voice.

"Yeah." Mila sniffs, wiping her nose on her sleeve. The sun looms behind the beach house, casting the patio and driveway in shadows. Within the darkened windows, the shadow of Aegon watches from behind the sheer curtains.

"I'm going back to Winterfell."

AN// nOW LISTEN PUT THE GUN DOWN I CAN EXPLAIN. Don't hurt me for making Emiliaegon fight :( we are all children of divorce. TRUST things will get better. The sadder the angst, the sweeter the subsequent fluff <3

Lula x

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flowers-for-em · 8 months ago

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Hiii im Emma the amount of fandoms I'm in is concerning. The amount of books i'm writing at once is also concerning. Point is you should just be concerned, enjoy your stay at my blog - here is a piece of cake 🍰

-> Im Emma/Ems or whatever nickname u want to give me I love giving people nicknames and petnames. Basic info -> She/her, minor, capricorn, intj, australian, ferrari girl, i will defend my babies warnette and evajacks until i die, a believer in sarcasm, i post about my writing sometimes, sometimes - cause im too lazy to write, im an ambivert and a joey lynch and damon torrance defender

Books -> [series] The inheritance games, acotar, shatter me, the folk of the air, pjo [im new to the fandom] the prison healer, caraval, ouabh, dance of theives, divine rivals, boys of tommen, the lunar chronicles, the red queen, the naturals, six of crows, devils night, boys of tommen [standalone] Better than the movies, the do over, betting on you (basically anything by lynn painter), the cheat sheet, powerless, the summer of broken rules and A LOT more. 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 Music -> taylor swift, gracie abrams, [recently getting into] maisie peters, tate mcrea, sadie jean, a little of lana del rey, chase atlantic, artic monkeys, guns and roses, conan gray. my music is all over the place lmao. 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 Movies/tv shows -> friends, b99, babysitters club, alexa and katie, fuller house, now you see me 1&2, oceans 11,12&13, knives out 1&2, mamma mia, adam project, red notice, enola holmes, and pretty much most chick flicks 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 Other -> rain <3, christmas, baking/cooking, art -> I paint, sketch, and draw, whenever I feel like it. I mostly draw though. 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 Moodboards -> I love making moodboards here is the masterlist 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝Writing -> i have a few side blogs but my public writing blog is @the-ballad-of-us and i also have a secret one see if you can find it ;)

Misc -> my dream life is to runaway to paris or new york and open up a bookstore/cafe/flower shop. (and to be the rich hot aunt the everyone loves), I want to travel when I'm older! [places] -> London, Paris, Italy, Greece, Turkey, Sweden, Germany, New York, Bahamas, Japan, Korea, and a bunch more!, I spend an unhealthy amount of time on Pinterest and Tumblr, 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 -> If we're moots, we're best friends, no takes backs. -> I over use lmao, lol, <3, :), and 😭 too much. im trying not to come on too strong and be rude lol (right there see? perfect example) -> My Wattpad -> My Pinterest -> I love talking to new people, and asks and dms (only for minors unless i agree to it :)) are always open <3 -> i most likely won't follow you back if you don't have an intro post, but if you want to get to know me just send me an ask :) 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝

Special people ->@skeelly - kris, @percabeths-blue-cookies - har, @a-beautiful-fool - lou lou, @moonlightt444 - mare bear, @nqds - nadsies, @mqstermindswift - nicky, @lost-in-reveriie - addy, @art-of-fools - mr o'hare, @reminiscentreader - jas, @myster3y - my wifey kiara, @sophiesonlinediary - soph, @deprivedofbraincellsandsleep - zia, @runwiththerain - ives, @doyoujustnotwantto - mihane, @that-multi-fandom-hijabi - nova my world manipulation partner, @hijabi-desi-bookworm - esme, @gergthecat - scout, @baboland - aria, @missedyour21st - fay, @daydream-of-a-wallflower - kat + all my other moots that i didn't tag but rlly wanted too [if you want to be added or removed just let me know!! <333

𓆝 this is a safe space for everyone!! ↳ Dni - if you're a racist, homophobe, sexist, pedos, ect..

love ya all <3

Emma

#intro post #new theme new intro cause i was SICK of the hearts and everything changing #so hopefully this time it works other wise im cracking a tantrum

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skeelly · 10 months ago

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"when im fat and old and my kids think im a joke"

hi!! welcome. i suggest putting a seatbelt on and i will pay for your therapy, dont worry. :)

☘ "hi, it's me. im the problem it's me.": im kristen! you can call me kristen or kris. minor. she/her. intp-t. ambivert. 🇵🇭. reader (sort of). notes app writer (sometimes). i could not care less about my dumb typos so deal with it. i suck at math. biiiiiggg ophelia wilde fan. delulu swiftie no.9273737277. rodrigoxpartidge's biggest supporter. claire rosinkranz is the reason for my existence. gracie abrams ily. "how long can we be a sad song?". im married to grayson hawthorne. mirrorball//tolerate it girlie 4 life. stromboli fan until the day i die. nick girlie by heart. pjo stan at this point. harry potter simp. hermione granger is my mother. sherlock and enola holmes stan. "no body, no crime". haylor (sorry not sorry). one direction is my life. FREE PALESTINE. kenji, my spirit animal. jude is so ughhhhh perfect. javery shipper cause jameson for avery, grayson for me :3. massive k!nye west hater so if you like him, please leave. but i love rap. certified professional procrastinator. capricorn (not a believer in those things though). i love reading poetry. correct grammar = non existent. i can (technically) fluently speak 3 languages. i can speak (basic, not much) about 5 languages?. piano enthusiast. very big sport girly (football *soccer. america football can kiss my toes. that sport sucks*, f1, volleyball, badminton, basketball, tennis and hockey fan). walker scobell is perfect and i love him. c²>>>>. sharl leclerc. max the axe. oscar paistry. ankara messi. sewy. leah is my bestie. dior is the best artist no cap. pookie nation frfr. charlie's luke is best luke. andrew is underrated. olivea is jusssttt.

☘ rappers i like//listen to: eminem, lil skies, ysbtril (does he count?), nicki minaj, doja cat (:3), cardi b (rarely), dominic fike (does he count? yk, melodic rap). tbh idk who else lol.

☘ all around favorite artists: taylor swift, olivia rodrigo, claire rosinkranz, gracie abrams, the weeknd, doja cat, lil skies, ysbtril, selena gomez (?), harry styles, niall horan, louis tomlinson, zayn, liam payne, one direction, clairo, conan gray, lana del rey, one republic, why don't we, the neighborhood, billie elish, ariana grande, abba, michael jackson.

☘ navigation?:

rambles: #kristenstedtalk

anything i don't proof read: #i didn't proof read this lmao

grayson hawthorne: #loml

cringe posts that idk why i posted: #/j or #post to delete?

asks: #askaroo or #ty for answering <3

sturniolo triplets: #stombolis

☘ follower count (as of march 20): 313 (im actually not sure lol)

☘ DNI: racists, homophobes, sexists and anyone that's ok with any form of discrimination

✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼ 　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼ 　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼

☘ safe space for: everyone lol

☘ my other accounts: @crysten my writing and other stuff @skeellymellows book rants (AAAH I CANT TAG)

☘ books/movies/series: harry potter, pjo, aggtm, tig, sherlock/enola holmes, little women, black beauty, tsitp, better than the movies. hp, pjo, enola holmes, tsitp, gilmore girls, gossip girl, mean girls, legally blonde, little women, hunger games (haven't read the books), marvel (barely lol), secretariat (my favorite :>>). tbh idk what else lol

☘ my people:

@stvrgirl111//@stvrlighhttt (mare) #maree

@urbanflorals (em) #walkers wife

@gergthecat (scouty) #evil batman sourdough guy #bread man #george

@mqstermindswift (quason) #nickyy

@nqds (NADS) #nads! or was it #NADS! ??

@reminiscentreader (JAS) #theworldneedsmorepeoplelikejas

@sophiesonlinediary (fifi) #fifi <3

@myster3y (kiaraah) #kiaraah

@regisdvmb(reggggg) ✶ @coco6420 (cocoo) ✶ @eddiethebanished (finn :)) ✶ @themidnightarcher ✶ @starchasers-stuff ✶ @what-about-wendy (wendy <3) ✶ @lucinda-008 ✶ @foaming-sea ✶ @lonelycatsblog ✶ @good-old-fashioned-lover ✶ @my-mind-is-frozen ✶ @dandelions-fly-in-summer-skies ✶ @baboland ✶ @blocked-zombieartist ✶ @sturn-wrld ✶ @swiftieannah ✶ @weeping-in-the-willows ✶ @s1xseasonsandamov1e ✶ @the-red-archer ✶ @svnflowermoon ✶ @helpimhopelesslyinlove ✶ @doyoujustnotwantto ✶ @atwtmvftvtvsgavralpsss ✶ @oh-whale13 ✶ @bonesofnixie ✶ @art-of-fools (stephanieee) ✶ @percabeths-blue-cookies ✶ @imthatweirdratinthecorner (a rat <3) ✶ @letmeseeallthefrogsinthecity ✶ @that-multi-fandom-hijabi (novaaa) ✶ @rachellelizabethhdare ✶ @sluttypoetsdepartment ✶ @kimu-dem ✶

#kristenstedtalk #intro post #re-done

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sheenashifts1217 · 2 months ago

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Pick A Pile #3

9/19/24

Message From Your DR Self

Take a breath and pick the image you’re drawn to first. Take what resonates, leave what doesn’t. This is a collective reading so some may resonate with this more than others. For a personal reading, check my pined post <3

Pile 1: Beach heart, Pile 2: Lightning Heart, Pile 3: Cloud Heart

Pile 1

Lyrics standing out:

“They say that we’re no good together and it’s never gonna work out

Everything you do is magic

Let em take pictures

Spread it all across the world now

I don’t know what to believe

Everything you do is magic”

Hi beautiful angels of Pile 1. Your DR self wants you to trust yourself more. You are your DR self. Your DR self is your CR self. Are you stressed about shifting? Don’t be because you’ve already shifted. Your DR self is telling you to take shifting and your DR off of such a high pedestal. There is nothing holding you back from your desires except for yourself. Get out of your own way. This I your sign to embrace all that you are and to on your power. You don’t need some outside cosmic force to make you shift. YOU ARE A COSMIC FORCE. Allow your reality to flow, it doesn’t have to be follow any rules. Magic is normal, normalize it to yourself because “everything you do is magic”. Every choice you make is shifting your reality, it’s that simple.

Your DR may include a lot of magic ad your DR self wants you to know that your s/o loves you like breathing.

Signs of confirmation, but not limited to: 444, blue bird, green leaf, dew drop, glass of water, blue, Billie Eillish, older women, dance

Pile 2

Lyrics standing out:

“Haven’t seen my mother in a long, long time

Do you really think I give a damn

I say I live in Rosemead, really, I’m at the Ramada

So many other things you can’t believe

Puts the shower on while he calls me

Your mom called, I told her you’re fucking up big time”

Hi beauties, Pile 2! Your DR self is telling you that you are having the time of your life. You may be a person who shifts pretty frequently, but to different DRs, or you may have a lot of DRs, but struggle to focus on one. Your ability to go with the flow is rewarding you greatly. If you’re shifting for an s/o, your relationship couldn’t be better. Marriage is in the near future for a few of you. Basically, your DR self is saying to sit back and enjoy the ride. Everything is going your way because you’re allowing it. Keep doing whatever you’re doing because it’s working. You’re on a path of healing and your inner child is shining. You are finally learning to give up on the thought of needing external validation and people pleasing. Keep it up because your hard work is paying off!

Signs of confirmation, but not limited to: “J”, red, crayon, curve, back road, country, serve, slay, boots, 24, 2, Taylor Swift, Willow, 90’s

Pile 3

Lyrics standing out:

“Now he’s just a shadow

My boy loves his friends like I love my split ends

My boy don’t love me like he promised

He ain’t a man, he sure as hell ain’t honest

Who are you?

He said he’d change

You want me to be yours, then you’ve got to be mine”

Hello lovely Pile 3! Why are you still doing things and allowing things in your life that don’t serve you? I know that was harsh right off the bat, but seriously, why? You know what you need and you know what hurts you. You’ve become comfortable in your cycle instead of actually speaking growth. Your DR self is telling you to stand the fuck up because you could be doing literally anything else, yet you’re self destructing. A lot of you began shifting to heal your inner child, but you began to use it to sulk and self destruct. Your DR self is you RN. You are in your CR because it is where you are desiring to be. Change your mindset to be in your “DR”, because right now, you’re making your CR be you DR by choosing to remain in the loop and keeping the same mentality. You always say you’re gonna change but don’t follow through. Actually do it, you won’t regret it. Your DR self says that things are great in your DR right now and they’re tired of you complaining about not being there when you’re not even actually intending to be there. A lot of things will lighten up once you face your shadow self and actually take that leap of faith.

Signs of confirmation, but not limited to: purple, cream, sparkles, glitter, candy, green, jeans, eagles, pen, fun, 888, 9, 23, trees, flowers

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yeahtimesten · 2 months ago

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a playlist for patrick zweig ⋆.˚✮🎧✮˚.⋆

i made a playlist thinking about this man and idk this is what i think it would be like… to be with him i guess? this playlist is sexy, sweet, angsty, passionate. i hope yall see the vision…. enjoy :3

fall in love - phantogram love it was enough to recognize to see i was the reason you feel sick inside

washing machine heart - mitski baby, will you kiss me already? and toss your dirty shoes in my washing machine heart baby, bang it up inside

always forever - cults you know you’ve got me in your pocket you don’t just have to wait around you know i’ll keep you in my locket just come here and we can settle down

juna - clairo why would i let you in? but i think again i don’t even try, i don’t have to think with you there’s no pretending you know me

kingston - faye webster it’s the thought of you that slightly scares me but it takes my breath away, forget what i was gonna say the day that i met you i started dreaming now i write em down if i remember in the morning time

step on me - the cardigans oh, i think you’re holding this heart of mine (my heart is yours) squeeze it apart, that’s fine

roi - videoclub, adéle castillon, mattyeux (english translation of lyrics) the lasting days, fleeing the night, i traverse your skin, i traverse the city the sweet smoke from your mouth leaves, escapes day by day when i reign in the night, im alone with my sins

air supply - sweet trip don’t make me smile if you don’t intend to only make me try if you can pretend to

everybody here wants you - jeff buckley and our eyes locked in downcast love i sit here proud even now you’re undressed in your dreams with me oh, i’m only here in this moment i know everybody here wants you

trash magic - lana del rey boy, you wanna go to my motel, honey? boy, you wanna hold me down, tell me that you love me? boy, you know that i have really never loved nobody but you?

perfect girl - marreux you’re such a strange girl the way you look like you do you’re such a strange girl i want to be with you

glory box - portishead just give me a reason to love you give me a reason to be a woman i just wanna be a woman

talk show host - radiohead you want me? fucking come on and break the door down i’m ready

margaret - lana del rey (ft. the bleachers) if you’re asking yourself, “how do you know?” then that’s your answer, your answer is no you gotta run, gotta run, run, run, run, like your heads on fire

heart to heart - mac demarco to the days we spent together to all the times we played a part in each others lives heart to heart

i’m your man - leonard cohen if you want a father for your child or only want to walk with me another mile across the sand i’m your man if you want a lover i’ll do anything you ask me to and if you want another kind of love i’ll wear another mask for you

i dunno what i’m doing on this account lol, i watched the movie super late and have been using my main acc to read fics and snoop in the fandom but i made this playlist and really needed to share it with lyrics so here!!! perhaps, if you want explanations or little blurbs based on any of these songs or others, send me an ask and maybe i’ll do something with them!!!

i’m also not sure if posts like this are interesting at all, but i’m also putting together playlists for tashi and art atm!!!

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matttgirlies · 6 months ago

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Matt & Me🎀

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24

a story heavily based on Priscilla Presley’s Book “Elvis & Me” based in the 1950’s - 1970’s.

fem! reader x singer! matt

disclaimer!! - in no way am i saying matt would ever support or do these kind of things, for the sake of the book certain unethical things do happen at times.

warnings - mentions of drug use

y/nn = your nickname for any confusion🩷

Chapter 11

Matt Sturniolo created his own world; only in his own environment did he feel secure, comfortable, and protected. A genuine camaraderie was created at Graceland. We lived as one big family, eating, talking, arguing, joking, playing, and traveling together.

Although I became friends with the guys in Matt’s retinue, he never let me, or anyone else, forget that I was his girl. I was never to get too close or become too familiar with any of the regulars.

One evening, after we came home from a movie, we said good night to everyone and went upstairs. Returning to the kitchen a few minutes later to get something to eat, I found Jerry Schilling, who’d just started working for Matt, making himself a snack. We started talking. A few minutes later, Matt appeared.

“What the hell are you two doing down here?” he shouted at us.

Intimidated, Jerry said, “Well, Matt, we were just talking. I was asking her how she felt, because she didn’t feel well this afternoon.”

“I came down to get something to eat,” I explained.

“y/nn, you don’t need to be roaming around here late at night,” he said, angrily ordering me upstairs.

Behind me, I could hear him lashing out at Jerry. “If you want to keep this job, son, you mind your own business. If there’s anyone who’s going to ask her how she feels, it’ll be me. You better mind your own goddamn business.”

I liked Jerry. He was warm, sincere, and very personable; just a couple of years older than I, he was one of the few people who I could relate to. But from that time on, it was a dodging match every time we’d run into each other. Now Jerry and I laugh about the “good old days” when we reminisce.

Most of the boys who worked for Matt had been around from the beginning and they knew all about him—his sense of humor, his sensitivity, and his temper. He stripped himself bare in front of them, and they accepted him for what he was.

Yet working for Matt was a twenty-four-hour-a-day job, and the boys were at his beck and call constantly. They played when he played and slept when he slept. It took a certain kind of personality to put up with his demands, whether they made sense or not.

“Come on, y/nn, let’s go to Los Angeles. I’ll show you where I film movies.,” he said one afternoon when we’d only been up for a few hours. He called downstairs and told Alan to alert everyone that he wanted to leave within the hour.

Alan said, “Okay, Boss. I think Richard and Gene are still sleeping. I’ll give ’em a call and tell ’em to come right over.”

“Their lazy asses are still sleeping?” Matt asked. “I’ve been up for two goddamn hours. They should have been over here by now. Alan, from now on, when I call down for my breakfast, call the boys and tell them I’m up and to be ready for anything, and that may include me not even coming downstairs. I just want them here.”

Demanding? Yes, but Matt could be just as generous. By today’s standards the boys’ salaries were not high—the average paycheck was $250 a week—but if the boys ever felt the pinch by the end of the month, they would go to Matt. They’d ask him if he could help them out with a down payment on a house or the first and last months’ payments on an apartment. Matt always came through for them, lending them the one thousand or five thousand or ten thousand dollars they asked for. He was rarely if ever paid back.

There also was no limit to the expensive gifts he gave them—television consoles for Christmas, bonus checks, Cadillac convertibles, Mercedes-Benzes. If he heard someone was sad or depressed, he loved to surprise them with a gift, usually a brand-new car. When he gave to one, he would usually end up giving to all.

James didn’t have much respect for the guys. He said Matt just gave and gave and gave, and they took and took and took. He’d say, “Son, we have to save.” Matt would answer, “It’s only money, Dad. I just have to go out and make more.”

James resented the regulars acting as if Graceland was their personal club. They’d go into the kitchen at any hour and order anything they wanted. Naturally, everyone ordered something different. The cooks worked night and day keeping them happy. James felt, “To hell with the boys. Their main concern should be Matt.”

What was really outrageous was that the regulars were ordering sirloin steaks or prime ribs while Matt usually ate hamburgers or peanut butter and banana sandwiches.

I wasn’t too popular around Graceland when I started reorganizing the kitchen. I set down a policy of having one menu per meal, and anyone who didn’t like what was on it could go to a local restaurant. This new edict resulted in much grumbling from the guys, but the cooks were relieved, and James sanctioned my decision, announcing, “It’s about time someone organized the meals. It was beginning to look like we were feeding half of Boston.”

Matt was the boss, the provider, and the power. Both the boys and I had to protect him from people who annoyed or irritated him and were no longer in his favor. Before coming down for the evening, he’d have me call downstairs to check who was there. I’d run down the guests, aware that certain names would strike him wrong.

“Shit,” he’d say, his mood destroyed. “What’s he want? Bring me some more bad news?” He’d stay up in his room rather than spend an evening with someone he didn’t like. There was one particular regular who had incurred his disfavor, and Matt told everyone he didn’t want him around. “Don’t let him through those goddamn gates!” Matt ordered. “All I have to do is look at his face and I get depressed.” Matt barred him from Graceland for a number of years, saying, “If he changes his morbid attitude, maybe I’ll change my mind.” His perceptions were correct, as these “friends” eventually betrayed him.

Matt and James kept some of their relatives at a distance because, as Matt explained to me, they’d shunned him when he was growing up, ridiculing him as a sissy, a mama’s boy. Mary Lou stood up for Matt and told his tormentors to go their own way. Angrily, she had said, “Don’t bother us with these accusations.”

Then fame and fortune hit, and suddenly all the kinfolk came around, begging for jobs or crying that they needed help. Sometimes Matt got upset, charging, “The only time they visit is with their hand out. It’d be nice if they’d come around just to see how I was doing. But hell no, it’s always, ‘Ah, Matt, I could use a little extra cash. Could you help me out?’ Hell, I’ll bet when I’m dead and gone, they’ll still be taking advantage.” But Matt ended up slipping each of them a hundred dollars or more every time they came around. If it had been up to James, he would have gotten rid of every one of them. But Matt kept saying, “No, Dad, they don’t have any place to go. They couldn’t work anywhere. Keep them here.”

From the beginning of his success, Matt put many family members on salary, and all had titles. James was his business manager; Patsy, his personal secretary; uncles Vester Sturniolo and Johnny and Travis Smith, and cousin Harold Lloyd, gate guards; cousins Billy, Bobby, and Gene, personal aides; and then there was Tracy Smith, who seemed to go from brother to brother for support. Matt took care of everyone.

I remember one night at Graceland when Matt came back to the kitchen and saw Tracy pacing the floor. “Hey, Tracy,” he said, “How ya doing, man?” Tracy, his hands in his pockets, could hardly look Matt in the eye. “I don’t know, Matt,” he sighed. “What do ya mean, you don’t know? Everyone knows how they’re doin’, man.”

Tracy, shifting back and forth, mumbled, “I got my nerves in the dirt, Matt.” Matt staggered back, laughing. “Nerves in the dirt! Hell, I never heard it expressed like that before. You need some money, Tracy?”

Again, Tracy just shifted back and forth, as Matt called Nate over and told him to give Tracy a bill. A big smile covered Tracy’s lined face as he happily took his hundred dollars and walked out the door.

Matt knew that having his nerves in the dirt was Tracy’s way of saying he was down and out—and worried sick about it. He never forgot that phrase. “Poor ol’ Matt,” he’d say. “I’ll never forget the look on his face that night, poor ol’ guy.”

That was Matt—always caring, always sensitive to everyone’s needs, even while presenting a macho image to his fans and friends.

Anything I could think of doing for him, I did. I made sure Graceland was always warm and inviting, with the lights turned low, as he preferred them, the temperature in his bedroom set to his exact desire (freezing), and the kitchen filled with the aroma of his favorite meals.

Every night before dinner was served, I came downstairs first, checked with the maids to see that his food was just the way he liked it—his mashed potatoes creamily whipped, plenty of cornbread, and his meat burnt to perfection. I always had candles on the dining room table to create a romantic atmosphere despite the fact that we always ate with several of the regulars.

I loved babying Matt. He had a little-boy quality that could bring out the mother instinct in any woman, a beguiling way of seeming utterly dependent. It was this aspect of his charm that made me want to hold him, shower him with affection, protect him, fight for him, and yes, even die for him. I went to extremes in taking care of him, from cutting his steak at dinner to making sure his water glass was always filled. I enjoyed pampering and spoiling him and found myself jealous of others vying for his attention and approval.

But I didn’t always receive his approval. If something went wrong with his dinner, Matt blew up. “Why isn’t this steak done? Why didn’t you make sure the maids cooked it right? If you’d have done your job, it wouldn’t have turned out like this.” Obviously something else was wrong, and I didn’t recognize it at the time. Because of the continuous pressures and problems in Matt’s life, all magnified by taking prescribed drugs, little things would set him off. I took responsibility for everything in his life and always took it all too personally.

I wanted to be with Matt as much as I could, but while going to the movies or the fairgrounds every night might have been a wonderful way for him to relax, it posed an enormous problem for me. Often I wouldn’t get home until 5 or 6 a.m., and I’d have to be at school two hours later. Sometimes I never went to sleep. When I did, I could barely make it out of bed. I would lie there trying to drum up the strength to face the day, Matt making it even harder by suggesting that I sleep in and cut classes. It would have been so easy to go along with his suggestion, but hanging over me was the agreement I’d made with my parents. They trusted me and even though I was letting them down, I still had to keep up the facade.

Day after day I drove to school, attended classes till noon, then returned to Graceland to slip back into bed and cuddle next to Matt, who was still sound asleep. When he awoke at 3 or 4 p.m., I might never have left his side for all he knew. I was there to give him his usual order of orange juice, a Spanish omelet, home-fried potatoes, a mere two pounds of bacon, and—first and foremost—his black coffee.

Everyone who knew Matt was aware that it took him at least two to three hours to wake up fully. Asking him to make a decision, even a simple one such as what movie he wanted to see that night, was ill-advised. He was just too groggy and irritable from the sleeping pills, which were causing him to sleep as many as fourteen hours a day. It seemed only natural for him to take some Dexedrine to wake up.

I was always concerned about his intake of sleeping pills. His horror of insomnia, compounded with a family history of compulsive worrying, caused him to down three or four Placidyls, Seconals, Quaaludes, or Tuinals almost every night—and often it was a combination of all four. When I expressed my concern, he just picked up the medical dictionary, always near at hand on his night table.

“In here is the explanation for every type of pill on the market, their ingredients, side effects, cures, everything about them,” he assured me. “There isn’t anything I can’t find out.”

It was true. He was always reading up on pills, always checking to see what was on the market, and which ones had received FDA approval. He referred to them by their medical names and knew all their ingredients. Like everyone else around him, I was impressed with his knowledge and certain that he was an expert. One would think he had a degree in pharmacology. He always assured me that he didn’t need pills, that he could never become dependent on them. This difference in opinion resulted in many serious confrontations; I always compromised my integrity and ended up taking his viewpoint.

I began taking sleeping pills and diet pills too. Two Placidyls for him and one for me. A Dexedrine for him and one for me. Eventually Matt’s consumption of pills seemed as normal to me as watching him eat a pound of bacon with his Spanish omelet. I routinely took “helpers” in order to get to sleep after wild rides at the fairgrounds or early-morning jam sessions. And I routinely took more “helpers” when I woke up in order to maintain the fast pace and, more importantly, to study for my final exams.

During the last month before finals, I started popping more dexies than before. They seemed to give me the energy I needed to get through classes and homework. Every free moment was devoted to cramming a whole semester’s work into a few weeks. But my concentration was scattered; the strain of life at Graceland had finally caught up with me.

I had already been warned by Sister Adrian that in order for me to graduate, I had to pass all my subjects. During a talk in her office, I wanted desperately to confide in her and explained how hard it was to maintain my grade level with the late hours I kept: But how could I tell that to a nun?

I had no real goals after graduation, but I did sometimes dream of becoming a dancer or possibly enrolling in an art academy. Now I realize that I was deeply influenced by Matt’s casual attitude toward continued schooling. He figured I didn’t need it and I agreed. Just being with him most of the time would provide an education—not to mention experience—that no school could give me. He wanted me to be his totally, free to go to him in an instant if he needed me.

That sounded great to me. I’d never planned on a future without Matt. Therefore, while my classmates were deciding which colleges to apply to, I was deciding which gun to wear with what sequined dress. I was tempted to say to Sister Adrian, “Oh, by the way, Sister, does gunmetal gray go with royal blue sequins?” With that attitude it was no surprise that I was still woefully unprepared for my most hated subject, algebra, the week before finals.

On the day of the test, I sat in the crowded classroom, hyper from downing a dexy, trying to work out the problems. Despite my effort, I knew there was no way I was going to pass. I started to panic. I had to graduate. I had an obligation to Matt and to my parents, who I knew would yank me out of Graceland the minute I failed this test. I glanced at the girl next to me—and at her completed test paper. It’s my last resort, I thought. I’m going for it. I was not willing to face the consequences of being sent home for failing this test.

Her name was Janet and she was a straight A student. I tapped her on the shoulder and flashed my brightest smile, whispering, “Are you a Matt fan?” Taken aback by my question, Janet nodded yes. “How would you like to come to one of his parties?” I asked.

“Are you kidding?” she replied. “I’d love to.”

“Well, I know a way that it can be arranged.”

I eyed her test paper and explained. Janet instantly grasped my dilemma and, without a word, slid her paper to the edge of her desk. Now I had a full view of her answers. I spent the rest of the hour furiously copying them down and I not only passed, but I got an A on that test.

I hadn’t expected Matt to make much of my graduation. His attitude was, “A diploma’s not that important; life’s experiences are.” But to my surprise, he really looked forward to it and arranged to have a big party for our friends after the ceremony. There he presented a beautiful red Corvair, my first car.

On the big night he was like a proud parent. Nervous about what he should wear to the ceremony, he finally settled on a dark blue suit, and I put on my navy blue gown. I couldn’t possibly keep the cap on over that mass of teased hair.

Matt had a limo waiting for us out front. But there was one problem: I did not want him to come to the actual ceremony. It would attract a lot of attention, and all eyes would be focused on him instead of the graduating seniors.

Finally I worked up enough courage to ask him to wait outside, and explained why. Smiling his funny little grin, the one that came to his lips when he was hurt or upset, he agreed without hesitation. “I hadn’t thought about that,” he said. “I won’t come in. I’ll just be outside in the car waiting for you. That way I’ll kinda be there.”

And that was what he did. I accepted my diploma with mixed emotions. I would have loved for him to have been watching, but only I knew what a physical, emotional, and mental strain it had been to get that piece of paper. To me, it represented freedom, freedom to stay out until dawn if I wanted and sleep all day if I wanted. It represented freedom from my school uniform and from the teasing the entourage subjected me to every time they caught me in it trying to sneak past them at Graceland. I was a big girl playing in the big leagues.

As soon as I could get away, I ran outside. In front of the church, Matt and the boys were standing by the long black limo, looking like the Chicago Mafia in their dark glasses and suits, each concealing a.38. Around them a group of nuns were clamoring for Matt’s autograph.

Excerpt from: "Elvis and Me" by Priscilla Beaulieu Presley. Scribd. This material may be protected by copyright.

a/n - so cute🎀

#matt stuniolo fanfic #matthew sturn #matthew sturniolo #matt sturniolo #chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #sturniolo edit #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo imagine #sturniolo smut #sturniolo triplets #sturniolo x reader #nick sturniolo #Spotify

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kozumesphone · 4 months ago

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IF U SEEK AMY ! ִ ࣪𖤐

stop ahhh 1. im so proud of you !! 2. you deserve literally every litte follower ngl 🦘

Here's my description, I guess: I can't stand social media, but I use it every day. I've been obsessed with Greek mythology since I was a child—I can't live without it. English is my third language, so I'm still not great at it, even though I speak around seven languages. I'd say I'm a pretty extroverted person. I don't have any specific hobbies, but I enjoy engaging in art a lot since I go to an art school.

My favorite artist is probably Caravaggio, and when it comes to music, my favorite artist is Lana Del Rey. I love her dreamy, melancholic style. I enjoy reading, especially books related to mythology and history. Some of my favorite books include "The Song of Achilles" , "Circe” , any murakami & rick riordan book and “The Secret History”

I'm passionate about learning and exploring new cultures, and I hope to travel more in the future. I’m also interested in psychology and how people think and behave.

I'm turning 17 this year, and I'm so freaking scared about what the future holds... i think that would be all ( btw im a straight female 🙌 )

⊹ ࣪ ﹏𓊝﹏𓂁﹏⊹ ࣪ ˖

HENRY WINTER ⭑.ᐟ

⟢ “but if you send for me, you know i’ll come; and if you call for me, you know i’ll run!”

I think henry winter (tsh) would be the best book bf for you (:

he’s such a grandpa when it comes to social media. you teach him how to operate on insta, youtube, etc.

you guys probably definitely met in julian’s class and it was not love at first sight at all—he was jealous you were so good at greek; so much better than him

but slowly, as you started hanging out outside the friend group, he finds so many similarities that he can’t help falling for you

the time he confessed to you was surprising and funny—he had said it in another language, hoping you didn’t speak it (but how stupid was he to take chances with a polygot like you?)

you compliment his introvertedness with your bubbly extroverted personality

being greek students, you both loved visiting museums—for the statues and the art; so expect a lot of museum dates!

also, library dates!!!! since you both love greek mythology and reading, why not? because you both definitely debate on key themes in many retellings and have a great time doing it

you share the same favourite artists—in art and music—driving you even more together

you guys go on a world tour for your two year anniversary!!

whenever thoughts of the future overwhelm you, he’s always there to reassure you that no matter what, you’ll face it together

+ both of you probably definitely grow older together and become heads of the psychology departments in two different ivy leagues <3

taglist for event — @serendipitous-girl @mqstermindswift @puffoz @skeelly @urmomabby

@sunnitheapollokid @jgracie @zurisworld-com @cinemaconrad @mqshido

@flowers-for-em @aezuria @thetunnelunderoceanboulevard @cherigall @percabethluvr

@pjoverseluvr @maybxlle @sweetnnaivete @riordanness @starlitszn

@metyouattherighttime @a-beautiful-fool @sequinsnstars @ssparksflyy @fayvpor

@iheartgirlzn @nomournersnofunerals @over-the-ocean-call @seaglass-and-string @cer3lia

@lara20aral @bloophasarrived @xoxochb @auroraofthesun1 @sophiesonlinediary

@solangelotus @brodieland @s1utlvr @imasimpdealwithit @waitingonher

@nqds @skyrigel @daydream-of-a-wallflower @hermidastouch @catastrxblues

@moon-drop18 @d4rkdi0rrr @hopelesslyromantic-shark @saltwatergirl6 @hope92100

event masterlist

#skye's cafe ~ ⋆.˚#💮 ~ skye’s 50 followers event ⋅˚₊‧ ଳ ‧₊˚ ⋅#anon #request #henry winter #the secret history #tsh

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lanasblood · 1 year ago

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how’s my favorite person ever ever ever ?!!!?? HUGGING YOU TRU A SCREEN RIGHT NOW

GIRL I–

EM'!!!! I love you but I almost didn't post this because of the meme 😭 know my love for you is stronger than my hatred towards that annoying tiktok trend ✨

anyway, I’m good because I just learned that I have no classes tomorrow AND you’re here so I couldn’t be better 🎉💋 *hugs you back aggressively*

#lana's asks #lana loves em' <3 #justin bieber fans don’t come @ me #it’s not him it’s the trend

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k8kaa · 2 years ago

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CL16 : I LIKE ‘EM CUTE!

content : sfw , fem reader , insta au , reader is your average coquette hello kitty influencer , charles likes readers posts and eventually gets to know the readers and things happen keep reading if u wanna know >:) and please dont be a ghost reader <3

a/n : sorry i wasnt posting anjos ,, i was having to much sex so sorry. no but fr i was on vacation!! anyways im back with a 100 flws special! its my first insta au and i thought i’d make the reader wear something cute ^^ !

yourusername

liked by sanrio , carlossainz55 , vogue , pierregasly , and 1,363,919 more

yourusername : cold but cute >_< !! <3

view all 6,739 comments

ynspookie : carlos sainz?? hello???

hearts4yn : queen of being cute and the most beautiful girl out there <3 anyways why is there 2 f1 drivers in her likes or is this a glitch ??

yourusername updated their story

this story is no longer available .

charles_leclerc

liked by carlossainz55 , lewishamoltin , scuderiaferrari and 1,963,627 others

charles_leclerc : beach day

view all 7,738 comments

ynspook : didnt yn just post herself at the BEACH??? this is so weird and why is it making sense.

bffcarlos : omgg i was js saying that???!!

yourusername

liked by kendaljenner , vogue , pierregasly and 1,727,828 others

yourusername : he loves my heart shaped sunglasses , he loves the heart shape my ass is -//- @ lanadelrey

view all 8,748 comments

f1wagupdates : is it just us or ..

sharlsgf : nope. the caption???

ynupdates : its lana omg.charles just posted at the beach😭 AND PIERRE LIKED???

charles_leclerc

liked by yourusername , scuderiaferrari , and 4,638,971 others

charles_leclerc : every man gets his wish (shes gonna kill me!!!) @ yourusername

yourusername : aaaa i wont kill u babe \(//∇//)\

charles_leclerc : my family is alive for now🤗

f1wagupdates : so happy for u guys!!

hearts4yn : OH MY GOD.

carlossgf : TWITTER WAS RIGHT.

ynswifey : atp . i want my gf back 💔 smh . still im happy yn found someone 😒..

#fanfiction #x reader #charles leclerc x reader #f1 fic #f1 #charles leclerc #charles leclerc x you #instagram au #charles leclerc drabble #charles leclerc smut #charles lec #f1 x you #f1 smut

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under-the-dirt · 1 year ago

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intro/masterlist!

hihihi!! i’m livie but you can call me liv or livie!!

age: 14 (bday is sep 23 :3)

pronouns: they/them but i’m fine with she/they :3 afab

nationality: i was born in and live in america but i’m italian, german and irish!! :D i can speak a bit of italian, and my great grandmother is an italian immigrant!!

general boundaries: i hate non-con!!! no non con!! don’t send requests for non-con please!! i’m fine with consensual somnophilia but no non-con!! also, under 13 dni!!

other stuff: i’m autistic and i have a bunch of other disorders so life can be very difficult but i cope through my writing and my art!! i love getting requests and i love talking to people!! i love music sm, and i’m almost always singing and dancing!! some of my fav artists are the killers, lana del rey, the weeknd, ghost, etc!

p.s. mutuals if i ever cross a boundary when talking please tell me!!! i’m very affectionate but i tend to cross boundaries on accident!!

writing boundaries:

• i will not write non-con! never! this is for trauma related reasons and it generally disgusts me. read/write what you like, but this is where i draw the line.

• i will not write characters non-consensually groping/touching the reader. i might consider like a character protecting reader from being groped, but i generally can’t stand it. (naturally, for trauma related reasons as well)

• i will not write certain kinks/fetishes, such as foot fetishes, piss kinks or other gross kinks.

• i will never ever write illegal age gaps. never. do not ask me to write an adult with a child. do not ask for anything pedophilic. this is for obvious reasons as well as trauma related reasons.

masterlist under the cut! <3

masterlist!!

key: 🌲 = angsty 🌿 = fluffy 🪴= smutty

john price

no strings. - an ask for reader x price friends with benefits, but reader gets pregnant and leaves 🌲🌿

whispers. part one part two - barracks bunny exposes price’s little crush in front of the task force 🪴

sleeptalking. part one part two - based of Talking In Your Sleep by The Romantics, price hears reader talking about him in their sleep and their dreams become a little too real 🌿🪴

horror movies. - a request where reader and price watch a movie too scary for either of them and they can’t sleep!! 🌿

avoidance. - reader avoids price bc they’re afraid that he doesn’t like them back, and he confronts them.. 🪴 (not sure)

simon ‘ghost’ riley

phone call. part two - bf!simon fucks you while you’re otp with your best friend / bf!simon fucks you in front of your best friend 🌿🪴(def my best)

lap dog. - a fic where hybrid!reader hits ghost too much with their tail!! (no classification)

braids. - simon braids reader’s hair!! 🌿

hard to love. - reader and ghost are friends with benefits, but reader wants what simon can’t give. 🌲🪴

john ‘soap’ mactavish

water. - based on my friend bunny’s ask in their acc (aforementioned ask) where soap refuses to fuck reader and instead does it with the showerhead!! 🪴🌿

phone call. (pt. 2) - reader gets fucked by bf!simon and soap gets a special desert afterwards.. 🌿🪴

könig

distractions. - reader has a bad day at work and koko helps relieve their stress with a makeout sesh!! 🪴🌿

christmas gifts. - reader gets the boys a big dino plush for christmas!! 🌿

taskforce 141

christmas gifts. - gn!reader gets the boys a big dino plush for christmas!! 🌿

comfort. - 141 cuddles!!! 🌿

cold. - cold reader gets cuddled by all the 141 (not at the same time!!) 🌿

taglist: none

comment to be added to the main taglist! those are the only things i’ve written so far, please send asks/messages for whatever you want em to write!! i don’t tend to write things on my own <3

ily all!!!

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flowers-for-em · 11 months ago

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✧ Emma ✧ she/her ✧ minor ✧ books and food

┊ ➶ ｡°.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

Hii! Welcome to my blog:

Basic Info:

✧ Emma/Ems ✧ she/her ✧ Minor - birthday Jan 12 ✧ Capricorn ✧ INTJ ✧ Australian ✧ Ferrari girl <3 ✧ I will defend my babies warnette and Evajacks until i die. ✧ i am a firm believer in sarcasm. ✧ if you see me posting about writing its cause I have no motivation. I post about it, but don't necessarily do it ✧ I'm an introvert but will absolutely come out of my shell and become and extrovert when you get to know me

┊ ➶ ｡°.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

Things I love

✧ Books -> [series] The inheritance games, acotar, shatter me, the folk of the air, the prison healer, caraval, ouabh, dance of theives, divine rivals (waiting for the next one to come out), the lunar chronicles, the red queen, when in rome series, the naturals, six of crows.

✧ Books -> [standalone] Better than the movies, if he had been with me, the do over (basically anything by lynn painter), the cheat sheet, powerless, the summer of broken rules and a lot more I cannot remember cause I panicked :)

✧ Music -> Taylor swift, Gracie abrams, Tate McRea, a little of Lana Del Rey, Chase Atlantic, Artic Monkeys, Guns and Roses, Little mix, Conan Gray. My music is allllll over the place lmao.

✧ Christmas <3333

✧ Rain <3

✧ Movies -> Now you see me 1 & 2, knives out 1 & 2, oceans 8, 11, 12, & 13, Mamma Mia, the adam project, enola holmes, red notice and basically and chick flick

✧ Tv shows -> B99, Friends, babysitter's club, alexa and katie, fuller house,

✧ art -> I paint, sketch, and draw, whenever I feel like it. I mostly draw. I want to learn how to use gouache and oils paints.

✧ other -> baking and cooking :)

✧ making moodboards -> here is my master list

┊ ➶ ｡°.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

More Info

✧ my dream life is to runaway to paris or new york and open up a bookstore/cafe/flower shop. (and to be the rich hot aunt the everyone loves)

✧ I will most likely put 'lmao', 'lol', <3, :) at the end or in every sentence I can - just cause I want to talk to you but I don't want to come on too strong lmao (see right there - perfect example)

✧ I want to travel when I'm older! [places] -> London, Paris, Italy, Greece, Turkey, Sweden, Germany, New York, Bahamas, Japan, Korea, and a bunch more!

✧ I spend an unhealthy amount of time on Pinterest and Tumblr.

✧ I'm basically friendless if you exclude online friends. So if we're moots you're my best friend, no take backs

✧ Also I love getting new book, show, movie, music recs!

✧ My Wattpad -> My Pinterest

✧ If you want to know anymore just ask! Seriously, I have like zero friends in real life, so you can spam me anytime. I love talking to new people.

✧ special moots: [if you want to be added or removed just ask!] -> @blythexparker, @kitsohana, @myster3y, @stvrlighhttt, @skeelly, @my-mind-is-frozen, @atwtmvftvtvsgavralpsss, @bookscorpion73, @blocked-zombieartist, @urgirlnextdoorr, @nqds, @reminiscentreader, @crenna, @someones-name-inserted-here, @banilikesfictionalpeople, @yourinterruptingmyreading, @mqstermindswift, @seaveysoceaneyes <3

✧my 100 followers event

✧ this is a safe space for everyone!! ↳ Dni - if you're a racist, homophobe, sexist, pedos, ect..

lots of love

Emma <3

┊ ➶ ｡°.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

Ps: this was also inspired by @stvrlighhttt, hehe ik you said u didn't want credit but i think u deserve it mwah <3

#I redid this #this one was so much better #intro post #i didn't proof read this so lemme know if u see a mistake #for some reason it keeps making the letters bigger idk how to stop it

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tommasopraxis · 4 months ago

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AQUARIANO NATO, uma playlist para TOMMASO BENEVIENTO (lowprofile nas redes sociais, posta uma vez na vida e outra na morte)

1. SUPERMODEL por Måneskin / 2. CAN YOU FEEL MY HEART por Bring me The Horizon / 3. MARY ON A CROSS por Ghost / 4. All Alone por Saturn / 5. Silent Hill por Gorillaz / 6. Stop Crying Your Heart Out por Oasis / 7. Young and Beautiful por Lana Del Rey / 8. Sick like me por In This Moment / 9. (S)aint por Marilyn Manson / 10. Love you to death por Type O Negative

BÔNUS

Músicas em PT-BR na vibe do Tommaso

Aquariano Nato e De 10 Mulher 11 é Maluca, do MC SACI / Imaturo do Jão / Chamo de vida pra não trocar o nome da MC Luanna / Casei com a Putaria do MC PAIVA / Sem aliança no dedo MC XENON

#extras #{ keep saying }#playlist #a complexidade do ser humano precisa ser contemplada pelo funk e pelo emo!!!!

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seeinganewlight · 2 years ago

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2023 books read

updated reading goal: 150

1) nancy drew: the curse → micol ostow (audiobook, reread) / (jan 1) 2) all the dangerous things → stacy willingham (arc) / (jan 2) 3) lunar love → lauren kung jessen (arc) / (jan 3 - jan 4) 4) death by dumpling → vivien chien (audiobook) / (jan 6) 5) where echoes die → courtney gould (arc) / (jan 4 - jan 7) 6) the no-show → beth o’leary (audiobook) / (jan 6 - jan 8) 7) 6 times we almost kissed (and one time we did) → tess sharpe (arc) / (jan 8) 8) a fatal thing happened on the way to the forum: murder in ancient rome → emma southon (audiobook) / (jan 8 - jan 9) 9) this appearing house → ally malinenko (audiobook) / (jan 9) 10) spare → prince harry (audiobook) / (jan 10) 11) hell bent → leigh bardugo (audiobook) / (jan 10 - jan 12) 12) have i told you this already? → lauren graham / (jan 12 - jan 13) 13) partners in crime → alisha rai (audiobook) / (jan 13) 14) always the almost → edward underhill (arc) / (jan 14) 15) a room of one’s own → virgina woolf / (jan 5 - jan 14) 16) icebreaker → hannah grace (audiobook) / (jan 15) 17) the companion → e.e. ottoman / (jan 15 - jan 16) 18) feel your way through → kelsea ballerini / (jan 16) 19) comfort me with apples → catherynne m. valente (audiobook) / (jan 17) 20) a strange loop → michael r. jackson / (jan 21) 21) maybe in another life → taylor jenkins reid / (jan 23) 22) the fraud squad → kyla zhao / (jan 23 - jan 25) 23) the family game → catherine steadman (audiobook) / (jan 25 - jan 26) 24) the six deaths of the saint → alix e. harrow / (jan 28) 25) these fleeting shadows → kate alice marshall (audiobook) / (jan 28) 26) better than fiction → alexa martin (audiobook) / (jan 30 - jan 31) 27) this is not a personal statement → tracy badua / (jan 28 - feb 1) 28) nine liars → maureen johnson / (feb 2 - feb 4) 29) the nanny → lana ferguson (arc) / (feb 6) 30) finlay donovan is killing it → elle cosimano (audiobook) / (feb 7) 31) finlay donovan knocks ‘em dead → elle cosimano (audiobook) / (feb 8) 32) finaly donovan jumps the gun → elle cosimano (audiobook) / (feb 8) 33) someone had to do it → amber brown & danielle brown (audiobook) / (feb 12) 34) daisy jones & the six → taylor jenkins reid (reread, annotation) / (feb 8 - feb 12) 35) wuthering heights → emily brontë (audiobook, reread) / (feb 13 - feb 14) 36) practical magic → alice hoffman (audiobook) / (feb 16) 37) delicious monsters → liselle sambury (arc) / (feb 11 - feb 17) 38) the world cannot give → tara isabella burton (audiobook) / (feb 18 - feb 19) 39) this time it’s real → ann liang / (feb 14 - feb 19) 40) partners in crime → agatha christie (audiobook) / (feb 20) 41) the glass menagerie → tennessee williams (reread) / (feb 22) 42) missing clarissa → ripley jones (arc) / (feb 22 - feb 23) 43) the reunion → kayla olson (audiobook) / (feb 23) 44) twelfth night → william shakespeare (reread, annotation) / (jan 15 - feb 23) 45) the summer i turned pretty → jenny han (reread, audiobook) / (mar 1) 46) it’s not summer without you → jenny han (reread, audiobook) / (mar 1) 47) we’ll always have summer → jenny han (reread, audiobook) / (mar 1) 48) the late mrs. willoughby → claudia gray (arc) / (feb 23 - mar 2) 49) the appeal → janice hallett / (mar 2 - mar 3) 50) fatal throne: the wives of henry vii tell all → candice fleming, m.t. anderson, jennifer donnelly, stephanie hemphill, debrah hopkinson, linda sue park, lisa anna sandell (audiobook) / (mar 4) 51) a quiet life in the country → t.e. kinsey (audiobook) / (mar 6 - mar 7) 52) leave it to the march sisters → annie sereno (arc) / (mar 7 - mar 8) 53) wild is the witch → rachel griffin (audiobook) / (mar 9) 54) no exit → taylor adams / (mar 9 - mar 10) 55) julius caesar → william shakespeare (reread, audiobook) / (mar 15) 56) last violent call → chloe gong / (mar 10 - mar 15) 57) the witch and the vampire → francesca flores (arc) / (mar 15 - mar 16) 58) what lies in the woods → kate alice marshall (audiobook) / (mar 17) 59) the writing retreat → julia bartz (audiobook) / (mar 18 - mar 20) 60) spells for forgetting → adrienne young (audiobook) / (mar 23) 61) anne of green gables → l.m. montgomery (reread) / (mar 21 - mar 24) 62) an elderly lady is up to no good → helene tursten (audiobook, translated work) / (mar 27) 63) murder your employer: the mcmasters guide to homicide → rupert holmes (audiobook) / (mar 28 - mar 29) 64) fake dates and mooncakes → sher lee (arc) / (mar 29 - mar 30) 65) the sweetest connection → denise williams (audiobook) / (apr 1) 66) immortal longings → chloe gong (arc) / (mar 16 - apr 1) 67) lost in the never woods → aiden thomas / (apr 2 - apr 3) 68) that wasn’t in the script → sarah ainslee (arc) / (apr 3) 69) tell me what really happened → chelsea sedoti (arc) / (apr 3) 70) shakespeare in love → lee hall / (apr 4) 71) the golden spoon → jessa maxwell (audiobook) / (apr 6 - apr 7) 72) hamlet → william shakespeare (reread, annotation) / (mar 4 - apr 8) 73) anne of avonlea → l.m. montgomery (reread) / (apr 4 - apr 9) 74) anne of the island → l.m. montgomery (reread) (apr 9) 75) of human kindness: what shakespeare teaches us about empathy → paula marantz cohen (audiobook) / (apr 7 - apr 10) 76) ophelia → lisa m. klein (audiobook) / (apr 12 - apr 13) 77) anne of windy poplars → l.m. montgomery (reread) (apr 10 - apr 13) 78) women of will: following the feminine in shakespeare’s plays → tina packer (audiobook) / (apr 14 - apr 17) 79) juliet: the life and afterlives of shakespeare's first tragic heroine → sophie duncan (arc) / (apr 5 - apr 18) 80) your guide to not getting murdered in a quaint english village → maureen johnson, jay cooper / (apr 20) 81) when the reckoning comes → latanya mcqueen (audiobook) / (apr 21 - apr 22) 82) laertes: a hamlet retelling → carly stevens / (apr 23) 83) the broken girls → simone st. james / (apr 21 - apr 26) 84) the night swim → megan golden (audiobook) / (may 1 - may 2) 85) when you wish upon a lantern → gloria chao (audiobook) / (may 3 - may 4) 86) chloe and the kaishao boys → mae coyiuto / (may 2 - may 7) 87) ghosted: a northanger abbey novel → amanda quain (arc) / (may 2 - may 7) 88) happy place → emily henry / (may 7 - may 9) 89) the mad women’s ball → victoria mas / (may 9 - may 11) 90) the fiancée farce → alexandria bellefleur (audiobook) / (may 14 - may 15) 91) the strange case of the alchemist's daughter → theodora goss (audiobook) / (may 18 - may 19) 92) the weight of blood → tiffany d. jackson (audiobook) / (may 19 - may 20) 93) the twyford code → janice hallett / (may 18 - may 21) 94) never vacation with your ex → emily wibberley and austin siegemund-broka / (may 22) 95) the dos and donuts of love → adiba jaigirdar (arc) / (may 23 - may 24) 96) european travel for the monstrous gentlewoman → theodora goss (audiobook) / (may 22 - may 25) 97) one jump at a time: my story → nathan chen (audiobook) / (jun 1) 98) death of a bookseller → alice slater (audiobook) / (jun 1 - jun 2) 99) a treacherous tale → elizabeth penny (audiobook) / (jun 3 - jun 5) 100) chapter and curse → elizabeth penny (audiobook) / (jun 5) 101) julieta and the romeos → maria e. andreu (audiobook) / (jun 5 - jun 6) 102) a far wilder magic → allison saft (audiobook) / (jun 7 - jun 11) 103) meet me at the lake → carly fortune (audiobook) / (jun 11 - jun 12) 104) foul heart huntsman → chloe gong (arc) / (may 25 - jun 17) 105) rules for vanishing → kate alice marshall / (jun 1 - jun 19) 106) little thieves → margaret own (audiobook) / (jun 15 - jun 21) 107) the last word → taylor adams / (jun 19 - jun 21) 108) the three dahlias → katy watson / (jun 5 - jun 24) 109) painted devils → margaret own (audiobook) / (jun 25 - jun 29) 110) reign → katharine mcgee (arc) / (jun 25 - jul 1) 111) the chateau → jaclyn goldis / (jul 1 - jul 4) 112) a most agreeable murder → julia seals / (jul 2 - jul 4) 113) the shadow sister → lily meade / (july 4 - july 5) 114) if we were villains → m.l. rio (reread, audiobook) / (jul 6) 115) something is killing the children, vol 1 → james tynion iv / (jul 7) 116) something is killing the children, vol 2 → james tynion iv / (jul 7) 117) something is killing the children, vol 3 → james tynion iv / (jul 7) 118) you’re not supposed to die tonight → kalynn bayron / (jul 8) 119) something is killing the children, vol 4 → james tynion iv / (jul 9) 120) lock every door → riley sager (audiobook) / (jul 8 - jul 9) 121) something is killing the children, vol 5 → james tynion iv / (jul 10) 122) the sun down motel → simone st. james / (jul 9 - jul 11) 123) the only survivors → megan miranda (audiobook) / (jul 13) 124) at home with the horrors → sammy scott / (jul 16 - jul 21) 125) one of us is lying → karen m. mcmanus (reread, audiobook) / (jul 31) 126) bring me your midnight → rachel griffin (arc) / (jul 21 - jul 31) 127) one of us is next → karen m. mcmanus (reread, audiobook) / (jul 31 - aug 1) 128) the summer of broken rules → k.l. walther / (jul 30 - aug 1) 129) one of us is back → karen m. mcmanus / (aug 1 - aug 3) 130) what happens after midnight → k.l. walther / (aug 4 - aug 6) 131) the narrow → kate alice marshall / (aug 3 - aug 6) 132) night of the living queers: 13 tales of terror delight → edited by shelly page and alex brown (arc) / (aug 9 - aug 15) 133) the death i gave him → em x. liu (arc) / (aug 17 - aug 19) 134) heartstopper, vol 1 (reread) → alice oseman / (aug 19) 135) heartstopper, vol 2 (reread) → alice oseman / (aug 19) 136) heartstopper, vol 3 (reread) → alice oseman / (aug 19) 137) heartstopper, vol 4 (reread) → alice oseman / (aug 19) 138) the only one left → riley sager / (aug 19 - aug 21) 139) the getaway list → emma lord (arc) / (aug 21 - aug 22) 140) a good girl’s guide to murder → holly jackson (reread, audiobook) / (aug 23 - aug 24) 141) good girl, bad blood → holly jackson (reread, audiobook) / (aug 24 - aug 26) 142) as good as dead → holly jackson (reread, audiobook) / (aug 26 - aug 27) 143) five survive → holly jackson (reread, audiobook) / (aug 27) 144) one for my enemy → olivie blake / (aug 31 - sep 5) 145) business or pleasure → rachel lynn solomon / (sep 5) 146) maybe meant to be → k.l. walther (audiobook) / (sep 6 - sep 7) 147) yellowface → r.f. kuang (audiobook) / (sep 10 - sep 11) 148) going bicostal → dahlia adler (audiobook) / (sep 19) 149) teach the torches to burn: a romeo and juliet remix → caleb roehig / (sep 16 - sep 23) 150) none of this is true → lisa jewell / (sep 24) 151) the girls in the garden → lisa jewell (audiobook) / (sep 29 - sep 30) 152) a very lively murder → katy watson / (oct 3 - oct 4) 153) she is a haunting → trang thanh tran (audiobook) / (oct 4 - oct 5) 154) murder and mamon → mia p. manansala / (oct 5) 155) in these hallowed halls: a dark academia anthology → edited by marie o’regan & paul kane / (sep 14 - oct 7) 156) hallowe’en party → agatha christie (audiobook) / (oct 8 - oct 9) 157) the second death of edie and violet bond → amanda glaze (audiobook) / (oct 9 - oct 11) 158) the fall of the house of usher → edgar allan poe / (oct 12) 159) home before dark → riley sager (audiobook) / (oct 13 - oct 14) 160) a haunting on the hill → elizabeth hand / (oct 7 - oct 16) 161) the lost coast → a.r. capetta (audiobook) / (oct 14 - oct 19) 162) murder in the family → cara hunter / (oct 18 - oct 21) 163) starling house → alix e. harrow (audiobook) / (oct 22 - oct 25) 164) the unmaking of june farrow → adrienne young (physical and audiobook) / (oct 23 - oct 28) 165) when ghosts call us home → katya de becerra / (oct 28 - oct 30) 166) a christmas carol → charles dickens (reread) / (nov 5) 167) the fall of whit rivera → crystal maldonado (audiobook) / (nov 9 - nov 10) 168) iris kelly doesn’t date → ashley herring blake (audiobook) / (nov 11 - nov 12) 169) fair rosaline → natasha solomon / (nov 8 - nov 14) 170) the dead romantics → ashley poston (audiobook) / (nov 20) 171) if we were villains → m.l. rio (reread, physical and audiobook) / (nov 8 - nov 22) 172) the ballad of songbirds and snakes → suzanne collins / (nov 23 - nov 25) 173) i hope this doesn’t find you → ann liang (arc) / (nov 27 - nov 28) 174) the hunger games → suzanne collins (reread, annotation) / (dec 1 - dec 2) 175) the christmas appeal → janice hallett (audiobook) / (dec 6) 176) enchanted to meet you → meg cabot (audiobook) / (dec 8 - dec 10) 177) catching fire → suzanne collins (reread, annotation) / (dec 3 - dec 17) 178) mockingjay → suzanne collins (reread, annotation) / (dec 18 - dec 23) 179) none shall sleep → ellie marney (audiobook) / (dec 15 - dec 23) 180) little women → louisa may alcott (reread, physical and audiobook) / (dec 25 - dec 28)

#post: 2023 books read

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