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cloveroctobers · 5 months ago

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HAMMER TO THE HEART — THE FINAL CHAPTER: DANTE TORRES [Summer Writings]

A/N: We made it to the final part of this mini series that had no plans of being a series, which is still mind-blowing for me since I’ve nicknamed myself as “NeverWriteAPart2ESS.” 🤭 This is for the readers who asked if i had any more Dante on my list and here it is but I’m sure it won’t be the last! Thanks for all of your support. Also hope you have either a fun, safe, or chill holiday 💥 I originally had this planned to drop Saturday or Sunday but I’ve been in my writing bag lately so enjoy this (mostly) angst gift ✨

🏷️: @darqchilddaydreamz as always thanks for tuning in, I love reading your responses ❤️

S/N: Seraphina now has a face readers but ofc you’re always welcome to imagine whomever! + rewatched the last two episodes to refresh my noggin—I’m still new to PD and debating if I want to get into it from the beginning due to past ICKS so if some things are/have been inaccurate that’s why lol.

WARNINGS: language, tweaked the original plot just a little, light? discussion of deceased bodies, bodily injury, triggering flashbacks, & a LENGTHY read!

<- read part two here.

𓂃 ࿐ 𓂃࿐ 𓂃 ࿐ 𓂃࿐ 𓂃 ࿐ 𓂃࿐

There’s an unknown number that stands out on Dante’s phone screen. He came to the bar with Atwater and Ruzek, Ruzek briefly disappeared to the bathroom after telling Dante he was ready to kick his ass in some pool and Atwater struck up a conversation with a very flirtatious woman that Dante had to point out to him. It was funny how the taller man tried to get updates on what was going on with him and Seraphina but was being oblivious to the attractive woman that wanted his attention.

Dante’s sipping at his beer when he feels his phone vibrating. Shifting a bit he manages to pull the phone from his pocket, peering at it he swallows the alcholic beverage before swiping across the screen. “Hello?”

“Hey, man thanks for picking up! Uh, sorry to bother you.”

Dante turns his eyes into slits, picking up on the familiar voice, “…Manny? How’d you get my number?”

“Remember my dad who I mentioned weeks ago?”

How could Dante forget? That day on his thirty-first birthday has been on his mind since and after everything that went down, added more disdain for his “special,” day.

Dante felt his eye twitch, “The old cop?”

“Uh huh…I guess you guys still have some type of pull even if you’re retired.”

Dante rubs at his face, slightly irked. Resting his elbows onto the counter he exhales as he thinks about what he should do about this situation. Somehow he chose to brush that off for now and get back to the point of this call.

Dante presses, “…is there something you need?”

It’s not as loud on Manny’s side of the line besides the barking that he scolds before it’s quiet again compared to Dante’s but the buzzed haired cop is focused on nothing but the intent of this call right now. “it might not be anything but my last call with Phina-Mena ended kinda abruptly. And I’ve been trying to reach out to her since and it seems like the call keeps dropping? I was just wondering if you heard from her?”

Dante feels his jaw tighten at this, it hasn’t been easy for him to process that Seraphina’s been keeping this from him at all. Which of course added to the mountains of tension between the two and it’s actually been two weeks since his birthday. Once Voight realized that Dante had a deeper connection to Seraphina than what this case is and felt a way about him getting her involved, Voight made sure to carry out visits to the lab without him.

Which further pissed Dante off.

“You gave me shit about not only becoming a cop but kept giving me shit about the situation with Gloria…and you think it’s okay getting yourself involved in this kind of danger when you already stepped away from it?” Dante felt like his brows were touching, the aggravation burned through his veins as he tossed Seraphina’s front door shut behind him.

The short haired woman continues her walk to the back of her home, to the kitchen, “Nothing about this case is okay and I have valid reasons just like you do with your career and Gloria. I may not fully ever get that second half but it happened and it is what it is.”

Which was ironic to hear since Seraphina was the one who said that she was done taking things for what they were with Dante. Was this all to get back underneath his skin because honestly it felt like she was kinda trying him?

“Yeah somehow I don’t think you’re gonna be saying that if you get yourself killed.” Dante’s usual gentle tone feels like frostbite, making Seraphina freeze in her tracks right in the center of her kitchen.

Relaxing her shoulders she turns to face Dante. His doe eyes are wide and he looks as if he wants to start pacing the floor but Seraphina isn’t in the mood to soothe him, not when his attitude’s been ugly since she made herself comfortable down at the district.

“You’re worried, that’s fine.” Seraphina shrugs, “I can understand that but you’re acting as if Voight handed me a gun—

Dante scoffs, “He might as well have!”

Seraphina argues as if it was so simple, “Tay, I’m working on the chemical end, not the physical. That’s your guy’s area. What you all signed up for.”

It wasn’t only PD’s job. She allowed herself to get thrown back into the true forensics of things. The amount of bodies that ranged from young kids to teens months ago to current time—still children was insane. At first the cases Seraphina’s dealt with, didn’t seem connected to her until she found something in common with each of the youngest children, that high traces of Librium contributed to their death along with specific wounds that ultimately caused them to bleed out.

The darkness was falling and Seraphina did not seem like she was ready to dodge it.

“What we’re dealing with is a serial killer.” Dante states while the woman nods her head being full aware from what she’s seen and before what made headlines, “They’re smart and have been steps ahead of us lately. If they find out that someone else is onto them…then there’s no telling what they have up their sleeve next.”

Seraphina inhaled and exhaled, “Which is why we’re doing everything to catch them and why Voight brought me on. He knows I can help so why can’t you?”

Dante shakes his head, “I never said that. You’re outstanding at anything you do…I just can’t go through having you in harm’s way again.”

She gets close to him now, hand going to grab the side of his neck and he thinks she’s going to embrace him but she just brings her chin above his shoulder, making sure her lips are near his ear, “Well, that’s not up for you to decide.”

And she goes to exit the kitchen, forgetting her appetite but Dante’s not finished as he also whips around, stalking after her, ready to follow her all around the house to get his feelings out about the path Seraphina was throwing herself back into.

The battle was just beginning.

Dante ignores Manny’s question and decides to ask his own, “when was this?”

“Last night.” Manny answers, “l called to see what she thought about the lastest MasterChef episode and we were just about to get off the phone after she took the trash out but there was some…shuffling? I guess and then the call dropped.”

At that moment, Dante felt as if all the air was just punched out of lungs. His head drops and he’s rubbing at his face now, eyes clenched while trying to find some air to bring back into his body. “time.”

“Pardon?”

“What,” Dante tries to keep his tone leveled but his gut was telling him that something was wrong and his stomach’s been funny since he last left his person’s house two weeks ago, “What time did this happen last night?”

Manny blew out a breath, “It was late…some time after 10pm my time and 9 for you guys.”

“You said you heard scuffling—

“Shuffling,” Manny corrected, “but now that you mention it, maybe it was more of a scuffle.”

“Did you try to call back?”

“Course. What kind of guy would I be if I didn’t check on a lady to make sure she made it safely into her home?” Manny says if it Dante offended him but it’s not like he cared, “There was a text sent ten minutes later saying that she dropped her phone, cracked her screen and would probably have to take it to a repair shop or get a new one but I haven’t heard from her all day today and we usually send morning affirmation texts or checking in texts during the day…it’s after 9pm now and there’s still nada. White noise.”

Dante can see that Ruzek’s made his way back out of his peripheral view, “Alright, I’ll get back to you.”

“Great, keep me posted. You now have my number—

Dante ends the call.

When his eyes meet Ruzek’s, his smirk vanishes as Ruzek gets rid of the teasing that’s sitting on his tongue, watching Atwater trying to spit game once he takes in Dante’s facial expression.

“Dante, what’s up?”

Dante’s rapid blinking makes Ruzek further concerned as he lets the words slip from his lips, explaining, “We have to do a wellness check on Nina.”

And Adam doesn’t need to hear anymore, with Dante making his exit before getting on the phone again, leaving Ruzek to toss some money on the counter in thanks to the bartender and calls out to interrupt whatever Kevin and his potential love interest of the night had going on.

When the trio make it to Seraphina’s brick home, Dante only pauses for a short time, his eyes scanning all over the exterior that was basically his first safe space once she brought it and second home. Kevin and Adam both share a look on either side of Dante, tempted to ease his worries but they were loud enough as they stood beside him.

It was a silent conversation between Kevin and Adam, both eyes widening to push the other to say something first but soon they realized Dante whisking by them as he jogged up the steep steps. He stops at the front door and gives a quiet signal for one of the men to check around the back while Atwater chose to follow after Dante.

The door was closed shut but not locked and that was something she did not do. With a twist of the door followed by his foot, he pushes the door open and calls out, “Nina…are you home?”

The home doesn’t feel warmed by her spirit so his mind already told him what he needed to know. Atwater does the honors of going up the first set of stairs to the right while Dante is checking closets, scanning the living room and there’s a closed laptop sitting on the coffee table, before heading down the hall. He passes the second set of stairs, checks the half bathroom, and continues to the kitchen. The house looks as it should and there’s a carton of raspberry chocolate chip Talenti ice cream soaking in the sink, perhaps it’s something she forgot to toss into the trash being too wrapped up in a conversation with Manny…but it reminds Dante of a dark time back in July when they were kids.

That July where their scars got fresh ones.

There’s a snapping that irks Seraphina’s ears, a light so bright that shines against the skin of her closed eyelids. She can feel her neck beginning to ache right at the spinal cord, the weight being too much to bare as she struggles to get the pressure off. It takes time but the light that keeps flickering is supposed to be encouraging and it does get her to focus.

Leaning back against the hard chair, her eyes peel open but the one on the left feels tight and more than sore. Swollen. She tries to blink it away but that feeling is prominent and it makes the space above her brow experience a sensation that radiates to the center of her forehead, leaving her skull to throb. She had been hit with something when she turned away from her trash out back and now she was sitting face to face with the man the entire city was searching for.

“You don’t realize how fascinating you are.” He starts, “At first I thought my one more would only be Hank but then…I started watching you too.”

That unsettling feeling that sunk in was not pleasant. The woman winces as she feels the ties chaffing into her wrists and her ankles, “…this isn’t going to end well for you.”

“I could say the exact same to you.” The bearded man says, emotionless, “But I’ll do you a favor and let you get one last call.”

Seraphina huffs, knowing what that means but slowly let’s the determination kick in trying to buy herself some more time, “Did you really catch me off guard and hit me in the face?”

“It was a spur of the moment thing,” He answers honestly, “Like I said, you originally weren’t my target but I figured a two for one special wouldn’t hurt, much.”

Seraphina licks her dry lips, “tell me…are you married? Children? You should know, hitting women is a punk move but you got bigger problems than that. Kids? I hear the slammer doesn’t play with those that are kid killers.”

He scoffs out some laughter, “I won’t be there. I’ll be reborn, new by then and as for you…that’s to be determined. Are you a Phoenix or a scared duck hiding from the rainstorm like you’ve been doing over Dante?”

Seraphina clears her throat, “does that make you feel better? Speaking on things you think you know?”

He stands in front of the dark haired woman, hands clasped behind his back as he trailed his eyes all over her features, that alone made her skin crawl. It was as if he imagining all the ways to disfigure her face. There was a strong detachment in his eyes that would leave anyone shook.

“I think I know enough. I’ve watched all of you but the most intriguing happened to be: Hank, Hailey, Dante, and you.” He informs, “I needed Hank and I wanted you.”

“For what?” Seraphina quizzes.

He doesn’t miss a beat, “for new beginnings. We can’t take the easy way out but at least the comfort of a loved one in your final moments will make it seem that way. Which is why, you’re going to give me what I want and call.”

Seraphina shakes her head but stops as the pain follows her movements, “sounds like it’s more to give you a piece of mind. You think you provided all these people with peace as you tortured them for nothing?”

He has a cool blade underneath her chin so that their eyes are locked, “is anything really for nothing? Nothing is ever truly senseless. Look at yourself for an example. You’ve been here all your life, wishing on a star for Dante to love you back but maybe it’s a fever dream. Everything that you’ve been through, where you could have been, if only he took the romantic love you have for him serious—is all in your head.”

He’s squatting now, dry hands on Seraphina’s bare thighs. Her breathing hitches as the deranged man pulls the waistband of her Terry cloth shorts forward, “there it is.”

He’s in amazement and she wants nothing more than to spit in his face at him showing her vulnerability in this dark room.

Seraphina doesn’t look at him as he runs the point of the blade along her lengthy scar, “Stop touching me!”

She grits out but the killer can see that she was swallowing the rising tears down.

“Dante does love you beneath his own problems but he won’t allow it because he feels like he doesn’t deserve you. You know that. He chose someone else because that’s a life he’s known. You could have been a new life. Always have been which is why he keeps you close. He’s scared to have a life with you past friendship because of all of the things that happened when you were kids but most importantly he took a piece of life from you.”

The exposed air is cold against Seraphina’s old scar and she can feel her eyes burn; she just wanted this man to shut up and rot.

[July, 2009]

The horn from the opposite car is deafening.

A sixteen year old Dante is stunned on what he’s seeing. The classic mustang rammed into the back of Dante’s new low-rider, which was given to him by the exact man who decided to ram his car into the back of his. Dante’s leaning on his elbows on the hot gravel, trying to find his voice since his car was just totaled but that didn’t matter. What mattered was Seraphina happened to be in the passenger side eating her signature raspberry chocolate chip ice cream while he was outside of it, vibing to, “Forever,” by BBL Drizzy, Lil Wayne, Kanye West, and Eminem.

Although this was his first car through being involved with the gang, he took pride in it because he knew what he had to do to get it. He had to hide it up the street from his mother but she was no dummy, she sensed the change her in son the moment he returned the favor to his step-father, nearly beating the man to death. He looked up to, “Sad Eyes,” as almost an older brother with methods that gave him the potential to be a powerful man. However he wasn’t sure what this method was? And he scrambled to his feet as he heard the creaking of Sad Eyes’ car, he fell onto his shoulder out of the car, his eyes settling on Dante as he lay on his side.

“Why?! What was this for?!” Dante called out to him.

Sad Eyes just blinked as he spluttered around the blood that escaped his mouth, “Good Luck.” Were his final words.

Dante didn’t have time to process that right now as he circled around the car. His hands go right through the rolled down window to press a shaky hand into Seraphina’s pulse point. It’s moving but it’s too slow. She’s not conscious but the horrors were already settling in as Dante’s green hues followed the path of the crushed car and the iron fence that pierced through her abdomen.

There was blood everywhere. Dripping from the iron fence while pooling into the lap of her white jeans. His heart was hammering against his chest at the sight, she looked dead and that alone felt unbearable. He snapped out of it, hands moving to the handle of the door trying to pull it open but it was obviously jammed shut.

The sirens were squealing through the summer air in the distance and Dante just knew there had to be some sort of motive. There always was with this gang. Carefully he leaned into the window, pressing a kiss to her temple, breathing her in as he whispers, “I’m sorry, Nina.”

That wouldn’t be the last of his apologies. He went into hiding around the empty parking lot, just to make sure that the firefighters got her out and the paramedics got her into the ambulance. Dante was aware that the police would start searching the area but he couldn’t just fully leave his best friend behind. Not when their relationship shifted weeks prior.

Sure he’s thought about it, asking Seraphina to be his girl but he let the members of the gang get into his head. He only told the other youngest member of the gang, who went and ran his mouth to the main two in command: Sad Eyes and Joker about it. Rico aways had diarrhea of the mouth and sometimes Dante felt bad at how hard everyone was on him, until Rico told his business with Seraphina.

A meaningful intimate night that they all clowned him for. That she wasn’t anything different or even special because she didn’t choose to get passed around by them. Seraphina didn’t even want to be around the gang after they disrespected her, especially with most of the members being much older than the both of them. She would never be just some, “bitch,” and they told Dante that he would find plenty more along the way in this life. That did not sit right with Dante so he cut his time short with them that day (plus some days after that but they always came to him when he didn’t want to bothered) and gave Rico a nice busted lip on his way home. He felt bad about it later since the fourteen year old struggled to find his place in the gang and just wanted to be part of something but in that moment? A sixteen year old Dante stood on business, which the gang got another laugh at.

When Dante and his mother, Catalina made it to the hospital Seraphina’s father was just finishing talking to the doctor. It had been hours since Dante watched them take Seraphina away. He waited for his mother to get home from work, keeping his gun nearby just in case any other members dared came to his door, telling her what happened and she didn’t bother putting her things down. She waved him along, mind racing with a million and one thoughts as they left their home to catch the bus to the hospital.

Catalina prayed the entire way, rosary held in both her and Dante’s hands but the younger boy kept his eyes on the city lights that blurred by.

He couldn’t lose Seraphina.

“You piece of shit!” The boulder of a man hissed while yanking Dante up by the collar, “I told her to stay about from you countless of times but she continues to be hardheaded—must of been something you taught her. You bring nothing but poison, you started this. I know you convinced her to hide those pills that got my wife caught out. I know my daughter.”

Dante was breathing hard but out of anger, “you think you do, sir. You think you have the answers to everything but you don’t. You’re the definition of neglect. You neglected your wife when anybody can take one look at her and see that she was about to lose her shit. And Seraphina? The only time you paid attention to her is when you’re looking to point the finger for your miserable life. Tell me, do you really think I’m the only piece of shit here when you tried to drown your so called daughter the night they took Mrs. Coty away?”

“Dante!” His mother’s voice cuts through, knowing her son crossed a line but she never appreciated the way Mr. Coty spoke of her son, and she also wasn’t aware of what he did to Seraphina.

Her hand was resting right on Mr. Coty’s bicep tightly and she noticed the nurses looking, hands probably waiting on the phone to call security to throw them out. Seraphina didn’t need to be alone like this, this much Catalina knew and just needed these two to put their egos aside for the sake of Seraphina.

Mr. Coty huffed as he shoved Dante against the wall one last time, his head hitting the wall as he tells him, “You think you’re so much better? You’ve done nothing but break her and that’s all you’ll ever be, a scared little boy that brings nothing but damage. You think you saved your mother by beating that coward of a man down? You only ended up hurting her just as much and as for my daughter? Two broken ribs, neck sprain, and that fence went right through her pelvis. Do you know what that means? There’s a high chance that she’ll never be able to create life in the future and sure she won’t have to worry about that now but you’ll always be the reminder of what you took from her. That’s all you are, a good for nothing taker. So you remember that when you want to shit on my parenting skills.”

And Mr. Coty fixes Dante’s shirt, condescendingly patting his cheek as he stalked off in the opposite direction of where Seraphina lay. A sixteen year old Dante thought about many things in that moment, one of those being the act of swinging on the older man, there was a familiar look in his eyes that his mother saw so she sat beside him on the floor and brought him into her chest while he clenched his fists, holding back tears.

There was a time back when Dante was in the academy, where he and Seraphina slipped up back in their early twenties. The age of sixteen was the first time but as they grew, it happened again. She slipped into a bookstore while Dante was eyeing a new boba shop that was across the street. He had a tough day the day before and agreed to hang out that Saturday to get his mind off it. Dante knew that he had what it takes but the instructor was a Grade-A asshole and that only pushed him even harder. He easily pinned out what type of cop he would be dealing with and heard the gossip, so he showed his ass just exactly what he was capable of.

It did get tiring and he was exhausted but wanted to be around Seraphina to ease his mind. Seraphina stood across the street, a bright smile on her lips as she had a tote bag full of new purchases that her bank account would give her shit for later when she went over her finances like she commonly did every reset Sunday. She didn’t like what she saw, another woman, with bright copper hair, clearly flirting and being too close to Dante for her liking.

Did she not see that he had two drinks in his hand? It wasn’t Dante’s fault, he was a single good looking man and could do whatever he wanted. Seraphina just messed up her previous date that Seán set her up with because she was too hung up on Dante. It was ridiculous considering that they weren’t children anymore but constantly bringing him up to other contenders was a red flag. She saw that, had to understand how that was off putting because she wouldn’t put up with it herself honestly.

So she took the risk, not wanting anyone else to have Dante as they got into an argument over her shift in moods after their outing uptown. She walked right up to him, grasping his face and planted one right on him. He wasn’t expecting that as he pulled back, silently questioning what that was with curiosity in his light eyes but that curiosity is exactly what led to him connecting their lips again, picking her up and leading her through her apartment at the time to her bedroom.

She’d like to call it a true false positive, taking two tests after the third time. Her OBGYN confirmed it with a blood test and she was happy but scared. Seraphina and Dante were friends, the best anyone could have but they discussed that it couldn’t be more until she ended up wanting it to be more. No one else matched up to him. They were careful—not enough—and she imagined what children would look in their friendship and automatically knew Dante would be a great dad. Just when she worked up the nerve to tell him, waiting days after the news…she suffered a miscarriage alone because of that terrifying injury when she was fifteen going on sixteen.

Asherman's syndrome is what they call it.

“Somewhere around all of it, you still love him and he cares for you immensely. It’s twisted because anyone would have called it quits but there’s something…enchanting about you two.” The killer is back to standing up straight, “I want to hear how much up close so…call.”

Seraphina slowly blinks while she stares at the device the killer is holding out to her, “No.”

The bearded man deeply inhales, putting the burner phone back into his pocket, “tell me something…when you went through your miscarriage…when that abdominal pain almost ripped you apart from the inside out, did you dig your nails into the palms of your hands hoping that would help?”

She exhales, closing her eyes and knows what’s about to happen next. She doesn’t grant the monster with a response as she feels the blade pressing underneath her nail. Her screams did not go unheard in the room close by which contained a non-coherent Hank Voight and once satisfied, the killer whispers as he enjoys the drips of blood that hits the floor, “Take all the time you need but I’ll be back. It’s time to see Hank.”

The state of Dante Torres’ heart felt as if someone took a meat tenderizer right to it. He was right on Hailey’s tail despite Petrovic telling her to stand down. This case quickly became personal for the both of them and it didn’t take long to realize that Voight got snatched as well. The team all knew it was a matter of time and that was not something they wanted to continue to give to Matson.

He wished Upton stood on her stance of shooting Matson in the kneecaps and had his own finger on the trigger to fire. The next moments he blacked out on after seeing Hailey climb in the trunk of Matson’s stolen car.

Eventually he’s heading down the steps, eyes immediately picking up on Matson’s mutaliated body, eyes gaugeed out, brain matter surrounding him, and a knife sticking right out of his abdomen that Seraphina was still holding onto. Dante lowered his gun after putting in the call for the paramedics to make their way down.

“Nina,” Dante gently speaks as he gets down on his knees beside a sitting Seraphina.

He carefully reaches out to touch her bleeding hands but she pulls them back from holding the blade, curling her hands into herself numb to her missing fingernails. “Hey, hey, it’s me, Tay. I’m here, Nina.”

It’s like she’s not here, eyes glossed over but she hears him. “Dante?”

He nods and there’s a sob that rattles from her chest as a bloody hand tries to silence it. Dante springs into action, bringing her right into his arms. His face tightens as he glances at Matson’s body and back to Ruzek who’s tending to Hailey and Voight, he dips his head for him to get Seraphina out of here.

“I’ve got you,” he says to her after repeating a nod to Ruzek, “let me get you out of here, alright?”

Scooping her into his arms, he spins around taking her away from the violence that was inflicted. Hating that he didn’t try harder enough to keep her out of this. Kim nods her head at them on their way by, empathy was heavy in her large eyes as she watched her team member take the love of his life as far as he could.

“I wouldn’t call.” She whispers to Dante in the ambulance, one hand holding his while the paramedic is bandaging her right hand.

Dante hums as he brings her in tact hand to his lips, “I know Mi Corazón…you’re the toughest person I know, next to mi ma.”

Seraphina snorts before her eyes widen, “…you didn’t tell her anything did you?”

“She’s knows we’re going through our bullshit again,” he mocks his mother, knowing that Seraphina’s reaction was valid because as soon as Momma Catalina found out that her babies were up to some bullshit, she was ready to bring out the chancla after embracing them and making sure they were okay first, “but not the specifics.”

“Good.”

Dante scoffs, “good? Not good. I know what happened and you should be more concerned with that than anything else.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Seraphina closes her eyes but Dante nudges her with their clasped hands, “…can we do this later? I’m tired.”

Dante peeks at the paramedic who shakes their head, which lets Dante know that there could be signs of a concussion. “How about this? Let’s talk about the rest of our summer plans?”

“Are you sure you even want to spend the summer with me?” Seraphina wiggles around trying to get comfortable on the stretcher, “I know you’re going to beat yourself up over this and it’s not necessary. I’m a big girl and made myself part of this, not you.”

He exhales through his nostrils, laughing internally that she knew him so well. How could he not beat himself up over this? It was his job to look after her, something they both vowed once they became friends at thirteen. Once he got into the gang in juvi, he made sure he had people on the outside looking out; not only for Seraphina but also his mother until he got out.

“Yeah it is necessary,” he starts but Seraphina doesn’t want to hear it.

“I’m tired of Chicago, Tay.” She shifts the conversation, although the green-eyed man knows he can bring it right back there if he wanted to but he decides to listen on their ride to the hospital, “My parents went to Kansas City as soon as I moved out full time to get rid of all the bad memories so why can’t I do the same…even if it’s for a little bit? My cousin Behati’s been begging me to visit the New England area with her husband and two year old daughter.”

Dante is quiet at this but he shows he’s listening as he lightly squeezes her hand.

“B and Makari always extended the invitation to you too, you know?” She’s hinting as Dante leans forward to press a kiss to her forehead.

He’s met Seraphina’s cousin Behati and cousin-in-law Makari many of times over video calls and the pair seems so full of joy. So positive and compassionate with the intentions of showing that they were good people. Seraphina’s always talked about Behati and hated that she always lived far and cant remember the last time she’s seen her in person.

“You should go.” Is all Dante says, sending a small smile to Seraphina who goes silent at that.

Dante lets out a long exhale after cutting the engine. He knows they’re pressed for time as he’s in the line up, and glances over at Seraphina who peers out the window in excitement. Dante dips his head as they both move to exit the car, she’s fixing the carry-on that’s on her shoulder while Dante pulls out the hard-cover suitcase from the trunk. Reaching out for the handle, they both meet each other’s eyes.

Seraphina offers Dante a smile and he takes it, a soft grin splitting over his lips that she gets a view of the tiny gap in between his front two teeth before he’s pulling her into his arms. He always loved holding her. The feathered haired woman rubs at his back in his embrace as he holds onto her like he’s going to lose her forever.

“I don’t know where I’d be without you and I’m gonna miss you, Nina.” He says as their heads rest side by side.

She laughs, “I know.”

Dante snorts as he pulls back to look at the amusement in her eyes. It’s been a tough time after the events with the serial killer but Seraphina always knew how to keep going and this trip was part of that. She didn’t need anyone’s permission to relocate but she kept talking it over with her therapist—something new she was trying—and with Dante. What kind of friend would he be if he told her to stay after everything?

“How sweet of you.” Dante is sarcastic as he gently rubs the sides of her arms while Seraphina winks.

“I’ll be back after Labor Day.”

Dante nods.

Seraphina uses her pointer fingers to lift the corner of Dante’s mouth who rolls his eyes in return, a smile breaking through on its own, “And if you change your mind or want a little break from this…from Chicago, you know where to find me.”

He places a lingering kiss on both cheeks before hugging her again, lifting her off her feet, “yeah, I do. I love you, have a great flight. Now get out of here.”

She kisses one of his cheek’s back, “I love you more and I’ll text you when I land!”

“You better.” He puts her down on her feet, letting her take her things and watching as she makes her way into the airport.

Once she sends another wave and he can’t see her anymore, Dante circles back around his car to get into the drivers seat. The hammering starts in his chest as he starts the engine, pulling away from the curb and he’s struggling to swallow the lump in his throat.

See Dante wouldn’t blame Seraphina if she decided that she didn’t want to come back. They always talked about seeing what the world had to offer but Chicago was all that they knew. He was glad that she was getting out, although she claimed it was only for a little while, the back of his mind was saying something different.

His eyes flicked to the new ornament that he hung from his mirror. It was a old Polaroid photo, on Seraphina’s fifteenth birthday during a late December, she held up a deck of cards which shielded the lower half of her face, arm tossed over Dante’s shoulder as he appeared unimpressed wearing a red headdress that was Vegas themed and forced on his head for the photo.

Written on the white space in Seraphina’s chicken scratch of handwriting she always had it says: I’ll always celebrate my bday and ur bday enough for the both of us! —Forever your road dog, Nina :)

Dante sucks in some air after glancing at it, blocking his mouth with a shaky hand in attempt to quit the cry that wants to burst out as he puts on a smile.

He really was happy that Seraphina got out, for real this time.

This didn’t have to be goodbye but it was certainly feeling like it and Dante would be lying if he said it wasn’t breaking him.

Guess he’s a sucker for pain and evolving it into something better, which he’s competent of.

When Dante truly sinks into this new found emptiness, a separate shade of darkness, he comes to terms with: not having the reassurance of Seraphina by his side or a simple drive across town where she resides, he’s not entirely sure how this will all play out and that petrified him.

“Torres,” he answers his phone, after realizing that it’s been ringing for a while.

The familiar gruff voice replies, “I need you down at the district.”

Crime was never ending as Dante put his foot to the pedal, flying down the highway to dive into the life he’s built for himself.

And continues to buries the rest.

For now.

𓂃 ࿐ 𓂃࿐ 𓂃 ࿐ 𓂃࿐ 𓂃 ࿐ 𓂃࿐

FIN.

JK -> Here’s a bonus chapter!

Continue with my summer anthology writings & prompts here.

#Spotify #chicago pd #chicago pd x reader #dante torres #Dante Torres x reader #chicago pd fanfic #kevin atwater #adam ruzek #summer writing #benjamin levy aguilar

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darke15 · 2 years ago

Text

Hello again, Rhymieeeeeeee 🖤 @rhymingtree

The King makes his entrance…

yessssssssss

Ooh a Bucky POV flashback... this is gonna hurt

Oh no, it's worse. It's a nightmare.

ouchies

A moment of silence for Bucky's declining mental and emotional health, courtesy of Darke

You’re welcome

SAMUEL. WILSON. DIDN'T WE ALREADY TELL YOU. SOMETIMES NATASHA IS WRONG.

He should know better. He does not

Poor Steve had to deal with two Russians and his girlfriend taking his archer buddy hostage and then said hostage buddy had to deal with his best friend's (ex???) girlfriend who was pulling theatrics on every single one of them... no wonder he's tired.

😂😂😂

“Why do my World War Two veterans constantly look like shit?”

I feel like based on that limited information you can kinda tell what the answer is but ok Tony keep trying to be funny

😬😬😬

OH MY GOD PETER

.... I completely forgot he was here.... Um

Lol, you can’t just forget about him…like everyone else….

You winced lightly, holding your side as the C-17 soared over the Atlantic.

I'm on my Wakanda Forever kick so I'm imagining a very bemused Namor just looking up from under the surface thinking, "How many times is that loud ass hunk of metal going to fly over us?"

Blow that piece of junk outta the sky!

That was over the Pacific.

Same difference.

Hyde!Ghost did not pass high school geography it seems.

Can I just say that I love the term ‘Hyde!Ghost’ so much. It makes so much sense.

Is she seriously thinking about jumping into the ocean? What's she gonna do swim for miles until she can snag Ollie's ankle and drag him into the depths with her?

She hasn’t gotten that far.

Hyde!Ghost is ballsy and brutal... I mean she always has been but seeing her like this is almost always daunting to me

She’s what ghost would have been if danny wasn’t there to anchor her

BOONE. THANK YOU.

Our hero

“When’s the last time you slept?”

“I don’t remember.”

me this past week

Fr tho. We need to work on your sleeping habits.

“Maybe. If not, we’ll just camp out until they take pity on us.”

... They will not simply take pity on you, and neither will the elephants and rhinos and other wildlife outside their border.

Let’s be fr…boone would attempt to make friends with them and then proceed to ride them like Hermes and herd ostriches or some shit

Boone has sunset bias.

She really does

T'CHALLAAAAA

I missed him. I've been missing him more since WF and now I get to see more of him.

I missed him too. This chapter was perfectly timed tbh

The faint remnants of the heart-shaped herbs disintegrated with every step his gardeners took, trying to save anything that was left of the plant.

He sighed, shaking his head as he looked over the room once more.

Thanks to N’Jadaka, it was likely T’Challa would be the last holder of the Black Panther mantle.

Darke, I think you just illustrated the moments that spelled out his fate…

😅😅😅 shhhhhhhhhhhh

SHURI GETS TO SEE THEM ALL AGAIN

AND SHE FINALLY GETS TO MEET GHOST FACE TO FACE OH MY GOD THIS IS EXCITING

yesssssssssssss

I love Boone being annoying right now, she's so cute

She’s getting bored again…time for a different project 😏

“If King T’Challa doesn’t recognize this face, then there’s a problem,” Boone mused, trailing her fingers over the scars that tracked down her face.

she's right though, how the hell do you forget a face like that…

Fr fr

“Tell me someone else is seeing this,” you whispered, watching as the mirage began to fade.

“Oh, I see it,” Boone hummed, nudging you gently, “And I’m really glad you can see it too. I cannot be trippin’ balls right now.”

Don't be too glad. She hasn't slept in eons and she's arguing with voices in her head. As far as I'm concerned, she's not entirely reliable right now.

She hasn’t been reliable ever tbh

YAY Boone gets to hang out with Shuri and they can build her cool awesoma lab and they'll be best frieeends and oh my god the hell that those two can raise

Yesssssss Boone’s gonna get barred from reentering Wakanda after their shenanigans

“One of the first things you ever told me was—”

“Ghost,” he said quickly, “Nobody wages war with ghosts.”

OH I LOVE THIS

Yay!

“Ghost is a woman?” a familiar voice shouted from behind the Dora Milaje. You winced back, cocking your head to the side before a smile spread across your face and Princess Shuri appeared beside her brother. She looked you over excitedly, “I do not believe in the gods but...Praise be to Bast! Brother—”

I LOVE IT I LOVE IT I LOVE IT

yaaaayyyyyyyy!!!!!

I miss happy Shuri…

Same tho

“The question is: Is this new soldier stable? And can we bend him to our will, instead of hers?”

Stop asking questions. Those questions are scary.

😈😈😈

The real most important question is: Why in heck are these two not giving up yet... I kinda feel bad for them, they're all exhausted

well... except for Novak... He seems well rested

Don’t feel bad for them, trust me. It’s not worth it.

Yay Alpha Two and their Wakandan Adventure: A Thrilling Odyssey

yaaaaaahhssssssss

FINALLY my blorbos get a moment of relaxation. They deserve this.

They really do

“Wow!” Boone sighed from across the jet, leaning further against the window to get a better look.

“Boone,” you snapped, “Don’t touch anything.”

“Sorry.”

Boone being an excited toddler is always the best

I can see her geeking out at everything she sees.

“You could have come for help sooner.”

You shrugged, “Something we both need to work on, I guess.”

“Indeed.”

They're bonding. Two of my favorites are BONDING. I am literally vibrating with glee right now

I love them so much

Queen Ramonda, Daughter of Lumumba steals the show once again

She really does

“Mama,” Shuri said quietly, stepping toward the woman, “This is Ghost.”

“Ghost?” The Queen Mother blinked, “As in the masked madman that saved my Shuri?”

I love that she said that in English so Ghost knows exactly how she feels about her.

She ain’t scared about sayin’ what she means

But then Duke akes the credit (rightfully so) probably with the goofiest grin, looking nothing like the madman Ramonda expected him, or any of them for that matter, to be

And i love it for him

HOW DID T'CHALLA READ HER THAT EASILY

HE’S FUCKIN’ T’CHALLA that’s how

She and T'Challa are tied souls in that they are mirrors of one another in many aspects

See, i like that explanation better

it's great using the mirror metaphor in a more positive way now

For once.

You helped him see the vengeance inside of him. And he used that to better himself.

So, what in the fuck were you doing?

Having fun, duh. That’s a stupid question.

Never mind, she jumped in quick

Hyde!Ghost gives zero shits

You sighed, shaking your head as you looked up at him, “Can you help me see it?”

it's like I can hear the hopelessness in her voice

Same tho

Steve trailed off, following Clint’s gaze as it landed on a pair of redheads across the room.

Natasha and Walsh.

No fucking way.

Oh yeahhhhhhh

NO THAT CAN'T BE HAPPENING

But it is 😈

If he gets to Natasha then they're all fucking done for.

Heheheheheheheheheheheheeeee 😈

She’d hardly been able to sleep that night, the chance to finally meet Ghost and Libra and Agent Cavanaugh, after T’Challa had talked so much about them, was far too exciting.

If I were them, I'd be more excited about meeting the fucking Princess of Wakanda, probably the smartest woman on the fricking planet

Boone was vibrating in place the night before. Ghost had to lock the door so she didn’t go out exploring.

They were primitive, that much she was sure about.

If it's HYDRA made, it's a lot more than primitive. it's barbaric.

True

The way Duke is still grinning like a child in a toy store…

yessssssssss

AWW SHE NOTICED THE RINGS

I love ittttttttt

Killmonger was just like them after all.

He was trained to destabilize governments, taught to kill without remorse.

They were just like him.

Oof... that's a hard pill to swallow

It really is

also, now I'm curious... what would M'Baku think of this whole situation? I feel like he's the only person in Wakanda who could wipe Duke's grin off his face.

He’s coming, he’s coming.

Is Shuri starstruck?

Something like that

Also Darke we've talked about how Shuri and Ghost's relationship would be strained after T'Challa's passing, so I can't help think about that too, seeing the two of them get to know each other more like this

THAT IS LITERALLY ALL THAT I COULD THINK ABOUT WHEN I WAS WRITING. BECAUSE I THINK T’CHALLA WOULD HAVE TOLD GHOST BEFOREHAND AND SHE WOULD HAVE OFFERED TO HELP HIM AND HE WOULD HAVE REFUSED. BUT GHOST DOESN’T HAVE THE HEART TO TELL SHURI THAT AND NOW SHURI BLAMES HER FOR T’CHALLA’S DEATH

How many other women has Shuri met who can keep up with her prowess when it comes to tech? I'm sure Shuri has received a lot of praise and credit for how she turned Wakanda into the technological superpower it is now. But considering Wakanda has been closed off from the world, she hasn't received that recognition from people who haven't directly benefited from it yet, or knew how advanced Wakanda already was before she came along.

Also considering the way she’s talked about by the elders/M’Baku when they first meet. She’s considered a child and, though she’s incredibly smart, they don’t always trust her tech.

Shuri must be beaming right now. This is recognition she most likely hasn't received before. It's coming from two women she admired, two women who were completely different from the women she knew, looking at her works as more than simply advancements for Wakanda. Like these are art.

🖤🖤🖤

Perhaps… Lagos 2.0. That would get her out of the way, at least, for a while.

the fucking audacity.

😈😈😈

“Show me what you can do, and I’ll teach you everything she doesn’t know.”

IT'S A TRAP PALADIN HE IS TRYING TO TURN YOU TO THE DARK SIDE

***padawan

I haven't seen Star Wars in years so I might not be referencing it right BUT STILL

mwaahahahahahhahaha

Captain to Captain talk in a dingy old warehouse... and then King to Leader talk NEAR MOUNT BASHENGA!?

Like night and day

“I wish you could have been here to help my cousin. But, I fear he was too far gone.”

Right... because she has more in common with history's villains than their heroes…

Ironic, isn’t it?

Now my question is: Would she be able to help Shuri, if she had been there, with Namor?

I don’t know if Shuri would want/accept her help.

Oh my goodness, she's opening up to someone who is practically a stranger to her?

Either she is truly far gone , or T'Challa just has that way with people.

T’Challa is just that kind of guy

DID WE JUST GET

A DANNY FLASHBACK?

A PLEASANT DANNY FLASHBACK

OF THEIR FIRST NIGHT TOGETHER NO LESS

#origins leak

DARKE YOU ARE SPOILING ME. DON'T DO THAT. IT'LL GET TO MY HEAD. (and other places)

😏😏😏

— Danny laughed again, his breath whispering across your neck as he buried his face there, “I'm not afraid to throw your pretty ass out in the snow.” —

— “You think I'm pretty?” —

— “I think you're beautiful.” —

crying screaming throwing up dying

Oh please, you’re fine

“Listen,” T’Challa said, pressing a finger to his lips with a sure nod, “In my culture, death is not the end. And, if you listen closely, you can hear them guiding you.”

“I love your crazy ass. You can do this. We can do this together. I love you, mi amor.”

gimme a second

Uh oh

how dare you how fuckin dare you

Oof, here we go

how dare you give her that sliver of peace and then

Sorry

YES

NO NO NO NO NO

YESYESYESYESYES

NOT HIM

YES HIM

Bucky rocked to his feet too, closing the distance between them with a snarl as he grabbed onto Walsh’s collar, “If you hurt her again, I will not hesitate to snap your goddamn neck.”

DO IT. DO IT NOW.

HEHEHEHEH not yet

I think this one's my favorite chapter... And it's mostly T'Challa and Shuri's doing.

Same tho

But it could also be the most infuriating one (other than when Ollie revealed himself to be Ghost Wraith). He's getting his claws into every single one and it is terrifying.

It’s gonna be so much fun

I wish I had actually read Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde so I could connect those two with Ghost and her own dark side, y'know, so I can nerd out. But my god the way you write her inner thoughts and Ghost's thoughts, the push and pull on her sanity... oh it's perfect.

It’s a pretty good read. Short too.

That little teaser for Origins too, hehehe I'm getting too excited.

Same tho

Man I love this so much Darke. And you told me earlier that you had trouble writing Wakandans. I think you did a wonderful job on all of their dialogue, especially T'Challa. You captured his calming aura, his elegance, and his reflection of Ghost so so well.

Thank you!

My favorite part is Ramonda calling Ghost a madman and Duke taking the credit for that madness. We love an exciteable bean.

He was like, ‘uh, no. i was that madman. Get it right, your highness.’

CHAPTER 85: WAR DOGS

To all my live reactors,

Please, please, please, hide your reactions under a Read More cut. I don’t want any spoilers floating around.

To all my Anonymous Avengers,

If you want to react in my asks, feel free. However, I won’t be answering any of them until at least Wednesday if they contain spoilers.

Thank you,

Darke

┍━━━━━━━━ ★ ━━━━━━━━┑

And, for a moment, a weight was lifted off your shoulders.

For a moment, the air was still.

For a moment, you felt the peace he’d told you about.

The stillness, the clarity, the calm.

The King broke the silence after a moment, “We have a saying here: Rain beats the panther’s skin but it does not wash out the spots.”

You glanced up at him, with a deadpan, “No matter how hard I try, I can’t escape who I am?”

“Something like that.”

“That is not helpful, your Highness.”

T’Challa chuckled, looking you over carefully before reaching over to wipe a stray tear that ran down your cheek, “You have to accept yourself. That is what I mean.”

┕━━━━━━━━ ★ ━━━━━━━━┙

» CHAPTER 85: WAR DOGS

✪ B��ᴛᴛʟᴇ Sᴄᴀʀʀᴇᴅ : Aғᴛᴇʀᴍᴀᴛʜ

♜♠ Tʜᴇ Sᴏʟᴅɪᴇʀ & Tʜᴇ Sᴘʏ

⧗ Tʜᴇ Rᴇᴅ Rᴏᴏᴍ

»Jᴏɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴅᴀʀᴋᴇ sɪᴅᴇ Tᴀɢʟɪsᴛ

@thexbookxnerdx // @autumn-em // @fadingbakeryfarmoperator // @rhymingtree // @itsmeatballworld // @kippykasey // @turtleedovee // @kamalymaly // @onewithnomightypowers // @y-napotat // @riahmcq // @thequeenofthefallen // @jesuswasnotawhiteman // @fnnshelbys // @knowyourworth-sellyoursoul // @banbananas // @beans-and-toast // @violetvictoriabarnes // @oikawasblueearbud // @itsarussian // @mrsbarnesinmyimagination // @oopsiedoopsie23 // @luhuhzy // @heyimjustlaura12 // @moonlightreader649 // @petalren // @sighmurderbot // @soldat-petala // @useless-creature-213 // @xiyouchan // @kaiblog50 // @bookfeen // @nx-crisis // @aftermatharchives

***if you have a strike through your handle, it wouldn’t let me tag you 😞

#chapter 85// war dogs #battle scarred aftermath #reactions

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luxekook · 4 years ago

Text

the golden boy | jjk

» pairing: phys. ed. teacher!jk x biology teacher!reader » genre: enemies to lovers, smut » summary: the new physical education teacher insulted you the moment you met him, and you’ve given him hell ever since. if only you didn’t think that he was the most beautiful boy you’d ever seen and that he was so much fun to play with. » word count: 2.5k » warnings: 18+, cursing, switch!jk, dom!reader, jk says something dumb, sexism, reader is a bad bish, jungkook is whipped, declarations of ownership from kook lol, smut (slight noona kink, oral (f receiving), biting, hair pulling)

» request: @jeonstime said: JUNGKOOK + COCKTAIL PLZ

as part of the bangtanhq drinks and drabbles challenge

“And this is Dr. (Y/l/n), the head of our science department and biology teacher. You’ll be working closely with her to create the Sexual Education curriculum,” Principal Kim introduces you to the newly hired P.E. teacher. “(Y/n), this is Jeon Jungkook.”

You nod at this new arrival, extending your palm towards him. Jungkook is attractive as hell, if you’re being honest with yourself. Your eyes flick over the lean muscle of his body and the wide-eyed beauty of his face. It’s too bad you are swearing off men for the time being after a particularly bad first date last week.

“I thought you would be a dude,” He mumbles after a long pause, looking you over in confusion. Your nostrils flare as you rescind your hand before Jungkook can even move to shake it.

“And why is that?” You fold your arms in front of your chest. You have faced incredulity before from a plethora of men - and women - about your chosen career path. Most women and minority groups in STEM fields have. It is part of the reason why you have forgone the route of lab work like a number of your fellow doctoral graduates in favor of high school education. You want your young students to feel empowered to become epidemiologists and astronauts and brain surgeons no matter their gender, their race, their sexual orientation.

And you want to eradicate the exact kind of reaction that Jungkook is giving you. Your glare is ice cold and absolute as you pin it on him. Kim Namjoon, your principal, is facepalming from beside this new boy and is looking at you with pleading eyes to diffuse the situation. But, fuck that noise.

“I-I don’t know?” Jungkook finally blurts out, running a strong hand through his mess of chocolate brown hair, “I’m sorry, (Y/n).” His cheeks are flushed prettily, and you almost cave. You almost assure this Jungkook that his remark is nothing new. You almost begin to picture tugging him into the hidden closet on the third floor and— You cut off that train of thought.

“That’s Dr. (Y/l/n) to you, Mr. Jeon,” You turn to leave, pausing briefly to look at the duo of men over your shoulder, “Welcome to Bangtan High School.” With that, you stalk down the corridor. Your heels clicking emphatically as you leave the infuriatingly handsome and ignorant new hire in your dust.

You miss the longing sigh and the heart eyes that Jungkook sends after you. You miss Namjoon placing a hand on Jungkook’s shoulder and saying, “You royally fucked up, kid.” And you miss the way Jungkook scrunches his nose and pouts forlornly, “I know…”

The beginning of the school year arrives the following week. On the first day, you make sure to pick an impeccable first day outfit that screams ‘I’m a fucking badass bitch, and I will end sexism as we know it’. Of course, it’s an impossible task for any outfit to achieve, but your knee length black dress and black Louboutin heels come pretty damn close.

When you enter the doors of the high school at 6:30am, you look ready to kill. And when you lay eyes on Jeon Jungkook exiting the teacher’s lounge with a steaming hot mug of coffee looking like a snack, you think you just might. As soon as you start down the hallway towards him, Jungkook looks up at you and subsequently chokes.

You smirk, maybe you wouldn't have to get your hands dirty after all. “Morning, Jeon,” You sashay past him to enter the lounge he just exited. Unfortunately, he follows.

“G-good morning, Dr. (Y/l/n),” Jungkook says softly from your side as you prepare your own cup of caffeinated bliss, “I wanted to apologize for last week.”

You face him, eyebrows raised as you wait for him to continue. He blushes under your undivided attention and mumbles, “I’m really sorry. I realize that I sounded like a complete sexist asshole, and that isn’t me. I hope we can start over?”

God, he’s giving you the most adorable puppy-dog eyes you’ve ever seen. His curls are in complete disarray once again with one falling just so perfectly over his forehead. It’s honestly unfair that he looks this good at this infernal hour. Just for that alone, you let him sweat for a few more minutes as you turn back to finish making your coffee.

Finally, you address him, “Apology accepted.” He smiles widely, his eyes gleaming, and he opens his mouth to say something. You can’t have that. You place a finger over his plush lips and move closer to him, “But let me just say this. If you ever, ever say something like that in front of my kids, I will end you.” You grin wickedly up at him as you try to ignore just how good his lips feel under your finger and how much better they would feel on your—

“Good morning, Jungkook! Good morning, (Y/n)!” Vice Principal Kim Seokjin scurries into the teacher’s lounge somehow looking like he just woke up and stepped off the runway at New York Fashion Week simultaneously. “Happy first day of school!”

You pull your hand away from Jungkook’s mouth, grab your coffee, and head towards the door. “Back at you, Jin. Bye, Jeon,” You kick open the door with your heel and shoot them a small smile on your way out.

You miss the way that Jungkook adjusts himself in his low slung track pants. You miss the way Jin shakes his head amusedly after your departure and tells Jungkook, “That one’s a hurricane wrapped in a deceivingly cute package.” And you miss the way Jungkook nods absentmindedly as he licks his lips, ideas forming in his head…

The first weeks of school always fly by for you with new faces to learn, new courses to prepare, new material to deliver. You love every minute that you spent with your students.

But, you hate every last second that you spend hearing about the amazing new P.E. teacher and how handsome and sweet he is. It seems that everyone, aside from you, is completely whipped for Jungkook. Even your own students bring him up in your classroom, telling you about the new physical fitness regimen he has them on and raving about how cute he is.

Don’t even get you started on how much you despise seeing Jungkook in the hallways, in the teacher’s lounge, in the cafeteria. He seems to be everywhere you go, almost as if he tracks your location. He even pops his head into your classroom during your free period to say a shy, soft ‘hello, Dr. (Y/l/n)’ that sends you into a feral state each time.

Fuck, what is it about him that makes you go insane? One day last week you had even walked past the gym and had stopped dead in your tracks at the sight of a sweaty Jungkook wiping his face with the hem of his t-shirt. It had been a whole lot of abs and a whole lot more fuel for your fantasies.

It absolutely doesn’t help that you constantly catch him staring at you - your body, your legs, your mouth. You had even overheard him ranting to the media teacher Kim Taehyung about how sexy you are when you ignore him, how he wants you to like him, how he longs to please you.

You are at the absolute end of your tether - especially because you and Jungkook are supposed to begin constructing the Sex Ed. curriculum together soon. Just the thought of discussing anything sexual with the boy gives you way too many dirty ideas. You decide that you might as well just rip the bandaid off so to speak, and so the next time you spot that curly head of his wandering past your classroom after school, you gesture for him to come in with your pointer finger.

Jungkook’s eyes widen as he stumbles into your classroom. “Shut the door, please,” You say, getting up from your desk chair.

“Am I in trouble?” He jokes as he follows your orders. You glare at the tempting expanse of his back, his tapered waist, his tight ass.

And so you cannot resist teasing him. “Hm, do you want to be in trouble with me, Jeon?” You smirk at him as he faces you once again, his throat bobbing as he swallows.

“Maybe,” Jungkook mumbles. He fiddles with one of the rings on his fingers, a nervous habit no doubt.

You slowly walk towards him, your hips swaying. Stopping inches away from him, you grab his hand to stop his movements, “You’re a restless little boy, aren’t you?” You flip his palm over and place your hand in his, reveling in the size difference.

“W-what are you doing, Dr. (Y/l/n)?” Jungkook looks at you like he isn’t sure if he should run or kneel at your feet. You hope you can convince him to choose the latter.

You shift closer to him still and bring your mouth to his ear, “I’m playing with you, Jungkook.”

A whine bubbles up from his throat, “Say my name again. Please. I’ll do anything.”

You drop his hand and step away from him. Moving back to your desk, you prop yourself up on it and cross your legs. Your pencil skirt rides up just enough to show the garters of your tights. Jungkook chokes. You grin.

“I know you will, Jeon,” You continue to smile as he scowls at the use of his last name, “I heard what you said to Tae. You want to please me?”

Rather than be embarrassed like you thought, Jungkook swiftly approaches you and sinks to your feet. How divine. He gazes up at you with a mix of lust and hope, “Yes, more than anything, Dr. (Y/l/n).”

You slowly uncross your legs, giving him a glimpse of the lace that lies underneath your skirt. “Call me (y/n).”

His eyes widen further than you thought possible as he nibbles on his lip, “O-okay, (y/n).”

“Good boy,” You purr, reaching out to run your fingers through his hair. Jungkook leans into your touch, sighing.

Hesitantly, he looks up at you, his pupils blown out, “Can I touch you, (y/n)?”

“I suppose,” The words barely pass your lips before his hands are on you. His touch is tentative at first, running his hands slowly up your calves. He surprises you by placing a soft kiss to the inside of your knee, and for once you’re mad at yourself for wearing your favorite garter set.

His touch becomes more assured as he moves higher, his fingers digging into your thighs, his mouth placing hot kisses higher and higher. And before he can move his fingers over your panties, you tug his head back with your hand tangled in his hair.

“I don’t think I gave you permission to touch me there, Jungkook,” You frown, feigning disappointment.

His pout is fierce in response, “But, (y/n), you’re so wet. You smell so good. Please let me taste you. Let me make you come. I’ll make you feel good, I promise. Please.”

“Oh, I don’t know,” You sigh, “I can just call someone else who I already know will make me come hard.”

Jungkook bites your inner thigh, and you moan before you can stop yourself.

“You’re mine,” He glares up at you, “You’re my scary smart noona. Your orgasms belong to me.”

You push him backwards by placing the sole of your heel on his forehead, “And when was this decided? And why was I not consulted?”

“It was decided as soon as you looked at me,” Jungkook says like that should have been common knowledge, “And I didn’t tell you because I thought you would reject me.”

“And you don’t think I’ll still reject you?” You arch an eyebrow.

“No,” Jungkook grins, his hand coming up to grab your ankle, “I think you like me.” He tugs your leg over his shoulder, bringing you closer to him. His gaze flicks between your pussy and your eyes.

You roll your eyes at him, “You’re so infuriating. I can’t understand why I like you, but I do. Despite your terrible first impression, your annoyingly cute ass has gotten my attention.”

Jungkook’s grin is blinding, “So you do like me!”

“Against my better judgement,” You sigh, your lips twitching as you can’t help but stare fondly down at the smiling boy between your legs. “Now, are you going to please me, baby? Or just stare?”

Jungkook lunges forward, hitching your thigh further over his shoulder and pushing your underwear to the side. Barely pausing to breathe, his hot mouth is on you, closing over your clit without warning. You hum in pleasure, and Jungkook pauses to grin up at you.

“So responsive, noona,” The honorific rolling off his tongue, “And you taste so delicious. You’re so wet for me—”

You groan, “Jungkook, for the love of god, shut up and make me come.”

Jungkook sends you one last shit-eating grin before his tongue returns to lick at your pussy, up and down. His mouth finally returns to your clit, sucking it between his lips and swirling his tongue around it.

Your hand once again winds its way into his curls, pushing him harder against you. He moans into your pussy.

The sight of the boy you’ve lusted after and slightly hated for so long being tongue deep in your pussy practically pushes you over the edge already. God, why hadn’t you done this sooner? You think to yourself as Jungkook brings his fingers up to your folds and parts them.

His tongue sinks into you, your hips buck slightly against his face. His other hand comes around to steady you - and to grab your ass. Jungkook’s tongue flicks in and out of you, and you feel the heat building up.

“Jungkook,” You moan, hand tugging at his hair, “Harder, baby.”

Your words have their desired effect as he replaces his tongue with two of his fingers and places his mouth back on your clit. You moan as his fingers curl inside you, the rings cool to the touch as they brush your walls. You come with a gasp. Jungkook continues to fuck you with his fingers and his mouth, carrying you through your orgasm.

He licks up everything you give him, and when you gently push him off you, he licks his fingers clean. “Well?” Jungkook leans back on his heels, “Are you going to need to call anyone else after I made you come like that?”

“That depends,” You laugh, “Are you going to keep making me come like that?”

Jungkook nods, his gaze dead serious as he says, “(Y/n), noona, you’re never getting rid of me after that.”

“Oh my,” You tease, “Whatever did I get myself into?”

And his answering smile is breathtaking.

#bhqdrabbles #bangtanhq #ficswithluv #networkbangtan #btswriterscollective #btswritingcafe #hyunglinenetwork #kwritersworldnet #bangtanarmynet #btsbookclub #btsnoonanet #jungkook x reader #jjk x reader #jungkook smut #jungkook fic #bts smut #jjk smut

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platonicavengers · 4 years ago

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headcanons for being the youngest maximoff (part two)

pairings: maximoff twins x sibling!gn!reader && avengers x gn!reader

warnings: spoilers for infinity war + endgame, death, non-descriptive violence, idk

author’s note: IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG TO COME OUT AAAAAAAA it was supposed to be up a while ago but things got in the way and im so sorry :(

tags: @madamevirgo @euphoniumpets

headcanons under the cut !

after steve broke everyone out of the raft you were all on the run for a while

vision and natasha joined you all at some point, and scott and clint returned home to their families

after a while wanda and vision decided to stay in scotland, leaving you with sam, nat, and steve

you were not a huge fan of the idea of leaving her behind

you had already lost your parents and pietro and even though she wasn’t dead you still wouldn’t be able to see her

but you knew why she did what she did

fast forward a little bit

you find out that tony went missing

and then that wanda and vision are being attacked

so u all fly to scotland to help them

*insert u being a badass and beating the shit out of an alien*

finally reuniting w your sister

there were tears

when you arrived back at the compound it was like a breath of fresh air after so long

it’s a shame you weren’t there under better circumstances

immediately getting upset when you saw the hologram of ross

that motherfucker

anyways

going to wakanda was an.... interesting experience

you wanted to enjoy it

but considering why you were there,,,,,,

it was kinda hard to enjoy it lol

wanda ofc stayed up in the lab with vision and shuri

she wanted you to stay up there as well so she could keep an eye on you

she was very hesitant to let you go into the front lines of the battle

even though you were an adult now you were still her little sibling and she was worried for you

you assured her that you would be fine though

fine might be pushing it but

let’s be realistic here

you kicked some alien ass down there

taking out enemy after enemy with no hesitation

pretty impressive tbh. ur fucking awesome

ily

anyways

eventually wanda came down to join the battle

the two of you fought alongside each other

badass sibling duo ugh yes

but then

you had to go against thanos himself

ugly ass mf

you tried to use your magic to remove his gauntlet

you were unsuccessful

he kinda tossed you to the side like a rag doll

which hurt like a bitch

when he snapped you had no idea what tf to do

i mean you had just lost, what were you supposed to do?

you were in the middle of crawling over to wanda, wanting to try to comfort her over the loss of vision

but then she just kinda, disintegrated?

you were in shock for a minute

but then it hit you

“no, no, no, no, no...”

you started sobbing

now you had officially lost your whole family

after a little bit you made your way over to what was left of the team

you all kinda stood in silence for a little while, just processing everything that had happened

eventually you all returned to the quinjet and flew back home

for the first two-ish weeks after the snap you just locked yourself in your room and refused to leave

though eventually you did leave your room again, though very reluctantly

after three weeks had passed by carol, who you were quite fascinated by, returned to the compound carrying a spaceship with her

turns out tony was on said ship

you were glad to see him after so long

and now we jump to going to space to beat thanos’ ass (a g a i n)

you had never been to space before so it was quite a new experience

shame it was under such poor circumstances

when you arrived at thanos’ residence you were out for blood

he took your last remaining family and you were not in the mood to let him get away with it

and then you found out the stones were gone

and everything he had done couldn’t or so you thought be reversed

you were already ready to kill thanos before, but especially now that that was revealed

sadly though, thor took the responsibility of killing the titan himself

*5 years later*

you were 23 now

a whole ass adult

you still lived at the compound with natasha, not exactly having anywhere else to go

not like you would’ve left anyways but

nat had become your sort of support system over the last few years

after all, at this point you really only had each other

all of the rest of the remaining team went their separate ways, none of which deciding to stay with the two of you

one day though steve comes by

you were glad to see him, you had missed him a lot since he left

the three of you had a not-so-positive conversation and then out of nowhere scott appears at the front gate

he tells you his insane idea of using the quantum realm to time travel back to before thanos

you were very wary

you didn’t exactly have a lot of knowledge on the quantum realm but you could still tell that it seemed risky

the four of you went to tony’s house to try to convince him

he almost immediately said no

yikes

you all tried to convince him but to no avail

so you went to bruce hulk instead

bruce?? hulk?? who tf is he tbh

but anywho

when you saw him you were kinda like ????????

but chose to ignore it

you got him to agree to the time travel thing

and it was ?somewhat? successful

somewhat is pushing it tbh

scott became a baby which wasn’t great

but then tony showed up and fixed it like the genius he is

you helped recruit all the remaining avengers to help w the whole time travel thing

you were going to go back in time and get the stones before thanos could

you went with clint and natasha to vormir

you thought it made the most sense for you to sacrifice yourself

after all you weren’t even positive this whole thing with the stones would work, and you couldn’t risk continuing to live a life without wanda and the rest of the team

they stopped you before you could jump though

when natasha dropped you swore your heart stopped beating

she had been all you had for the past 5 years and then she was just gone

you ended up getting the soul stone but at what cost

you and clint returned to the compound and there was a small ‘memorial’ (for lack of a better word) for natasha

after that tony put all of the stones together into a makeshift gauntlet

after a little bit of deliberation it was decided that bruce would be the one to snap his fingers

bruce, hulk, whatever tf

brulk

LMFAO

sorry back to the headcanons LOL

he snapped

immediately everything felt different

you went out to look out a window, seeing a few butterflies fluttering around that you knew weren’t there before

a smile immediately took over ur face

“hey guys, i think it worked!” - you

you were about to turn around and walk back to everyone else

but then

you saw a large ship in the distance

and something began flying toward the compound

and then everything went dark

when you woke up again you were buried under a bunch of rubble

which bruce picked up off of you

you ran out to where thor, tony, and steve were

you saw thanos and froze

they were engaged in a battle and you tried to keep your distance in order to collect yourself for a moment

which proved to be futile because you were dragged into the fight not long after

you kinda got your ass handed to you

it wasn’t pretty

you were lying on the ground when all of a sudden you saw orange light surrounding you

you looked up to see portals opening, all your allies who you had thought to be dead stepping out

you saw wanda and you stopped breathing for a moment

you got up as quick as you could

which proved to be difficult due to ur injuries and overall extreme fatigue

you launched yourself at her, bringing her into the tightest hug you could muster

the two of you held onto each other for a moment before you had to return to fighting

maximoff sibling teamup part 2???? yeah most definitely

fast forward to after thanos and his bitch ass army lost (im sorry i just really dont have the energy to write all that rn)

and to after tony’s funeral

you and wanda had a l o t of catching up to do

5 years worth LOL

u had to comfort her over vision’s death a lot

considering that to her, that was still only a couple days ago

and a lot of the time when you two talked the mood was kinda depressing, all things considered

but you still tried to keep it lighthearted

for example

your absolute favorite thing in the world was the fact that you were now older than her due to the snap, 3 years older to be exact

you held it over her all the time, constantly making fun of her for it

all in good fun of course

something wanda really loved was when you would tell her stories from when she was in the soul world (only happy ones ofc)

though it made her sad that you had to go so long without her, and she missed out on so much

she wanted to know what she had missed

all in all

you two were incredibly close, the snap and its aftermath only further confirming that

sibling goals tbh

a/n #2: aaaaaa im sorry to end it on that note (i didnt know how to end it im sorry asf) but yeah </3 and once again, so sorry this took me so long to post, ive been super busy with school && life in general so i just havent gotten around to it :( butttttttttttt if u guys want i could try to continue this series of headcanons for wandavision?? i’d wait until friday ofc for the final episode and id spoiler tag it and everything but i could try my best? might be kinda difficult but i think it could be fun so if anyone wants that then lmk!! :)

#avengers x reader #platonic avengers #avengers imagine #avengers fanfiction #avengers x platonic!reader #mcu #marvel fanfiction #marvel imagine #marvel x reader #my writing #wanda maximoff x reader

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littlefanthings · 4 years ago

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WandaVision Episode 6 Thoughts - Heads up, this one has liberal use of caps lock

• This is a “Malcolm in the Middle” episode and there’s a chance it’s gonna color my take because frankly - not a huge Malcolm fan. Watched it for a bit when it was originally on (because yes, I am old as fuck) but...meh. It kind of got TOO mean for me?

• PS the real Malcolm in the Middle theme song is way better

• I get why they chose Malcolm in the Middle to base this episode off - it’s an easy way to see things from the twins point of view.

• It’s also a good way to show us how Wanda and Vision’s marriage is no longer like the cutesy, everything’s perfect sitcoms of the past. Malcolm in the Middle was grittier with a lot more realistic conflict between characters, so it fits with the conflict between Wanda and Vision.

• Okay, it’s been a minute since I watched Age of Ultron but I don’t remember Pietro ever being this much of a douche. ESPECIALLY to Wanda. Just seems like more evidence that new Pietro is really not old Pietro at all, nor is he Wanda’s doing. Even Wanda is clearly suspicious.

• Oh Pietro is HAPPY to play father figure to the twins for awhile NOT AT ALL SUSPICIOUS NOPE

• Director Cliché is cliché-ing again. Please let there be more behind this guy and his behavior than token bureaucratic bad guy.

• Oh hey, Jimmy surprised us and kicks ass in a suit, that’s neat and in no way reminiscent of one Agent Phillip Coulson. Nope. Not at all....Okay, I might be a little prickly over people online saying “Give us a show about Jimmy and behind the scenes of SWORD dealing with all these crazy super powered beings!” because THAT IS LITERALLY “AGENTS OF SHIELD” IT ALREADY EXISTS Y’ALL JUST SLEPT ON IT FOR SEVEN YEARS.

• .....::cough::

• THAT SAID: I do ALSO love Jimmy, I’m not saying he’s a total Coulson rip-off, he’s his own character - I just hope he continues to be his own character and doesn’t just become a Coulson copy (and if you actually HAVE watched Agents of Shield that might make you laugh for reasons).

• Herb is back! And still a lil bit aware of Wanda being in charge, maybe? The supporting actors on this show are really amazing, you can see how their acting styles change through the different decades.

• Holy shit this commercial is DARK. I mean all the commercials have been kinda creepy, but this one is just plain HORRIFYING.

• “Pietro” you are shady as fuck and I don’t for a second believe that you’re just here doing what Wanda wanted.

• “Shot like a chump in the street for no reason at all” PIETRO WAS SAVING LIVES BY ACTING AS A HUMAN SHIELD HE SACRIFICED HIMSELF YOU LITTLE BASTARD I WILL COME FOR YOU

• Darcy has a second PhD in Hollywood Hacking.

• Hayward is tracking Vision because obviously he was doing some shady-ass shit with Vision’s corpse.

• The edge of town isn’t doing so well, I think Wanda’s powers are being stretched a little thin.

• This thing with Agnes is VERY interesting. Is she just pretending to be a victim? Or is she a legit victim and she’s been a red herring this whole time?

• “All is lost” and the cackling are pretty creepy and put her back in suspicious territory.

• Monica’s superhero-itis is showing up in her labs again!

• lol super low-rise jeans omg I fucking hated that shit. I was like twelve and had to roll down my underwear because it would go up higher than the jeans.

• Pietro is here to kick ass and give us lots of exposition. Mostly the second part. So all the kids have been asleep in their beds this whole time? I mean good, I guess, but don’t they need to like - eat at some point? This has been going on for over a week?

• WTF CORPSE PIETRO. Not as creepy as Corpse Vision for some reason. Also is it just me or is his “corpse” form kinda - poorly done? Like maybe intentionally? The bullet holes and the dead guy make up are pretty obviously fake, which is odd considering how frightening Corpse Vision was and how detail oriented this show is. Did “Pietro” make himself look like a corpse on purpose?

• Pietro’s necklace is so beautifully 90s frat bro. Just looking at it makes Sublime start playing in my head.

• Okay, we’re all going to be analyzing Vision breaking through the barrier for the next week. We know that things changed in the hex stay changed when they leave (Monica’s clothes). And that drone Wanda threw at the SWORD agents was still covered in glowy red magic. The difference here is that those things were purposely expelled from the hex, while Vision is leaving against her will. What’s really interesting is the way Vision starts falling apart, it almost looks more like the snap victims getting dusted than how he actually died. It seems more like he’s getting sucked back into the hex piece by piece than actually disappearing like the snap victims - or maybe it’s just the pieces that Wanda had to “rebuild” to bring him back? We know that SWORD had him in pieces at their lab, so is he breaking up into those pieces again?

• Aw, Billy can hear his dad! Actually starting to like the twins.

• Wait - Billy is sensing Vision OUTSIDE of the hex. That feels like a big deal. His powers aren’t limited to inside Wanda’s barriers. This also kind of fits with what we learned last week - Wanda’s magic doesn’t work on the twins.

• Is Vision actually the twins’ biological father? (I only ask because magic robots are notoriously infertile and we know Wanda’s magic was involved in the twins creation) I know he’s definitely their Dad in terms of the more important aspect of just being a dad and raising them, but I’m just trying to figure out how Billy’s powers work. Is he hearing Vis because of a biological connection or just an emotional one?

• I cannot with Darcy being chained to the car. I just can’t.

• I kind of wonder if Darcy will even really be changed while in the hex? They’re moving right into the 2010’s I think and Darcy would fit right in just as she is. Wanda just used A LOT of power to expand the hex and bring a bunch of new people in and it seemed like she was already stretching herself thin with all those frozen people on the edge of town. So is it possible that Darcy will just be Darcy when she’s inside?

• I am 100% here for Darcy being the one who talks Wanda down and into freeing Westview. Darcy’s superpower is just plain humanity.

• And maybe the ability to do a perfect red lip. The makeup is pristine!

• Whoever Monica’s aeroscientist friend is better be good after all this build up. I think she said it’s a guy, so that sort of narrows it down but really it doesn’t because it’s the MCU so like EVERYONE is a scientist.

• Overall this episode definitely feels like your usual episode-before-the-shit-goes-down. There was a lot of exposition and getting future plot points set up. Not my favorite ep (regardless of the Malcom in the Middle-ness) but it had a lot of heavy lifting to do.

• While “Pietro” made me VERY ANGRY because he is clearly BAD, I actually love him as an amusing character whose moving the plot forward and Evan Peters is amazing and clearly having a really good time making fun of himself and the whole superhero genre.

• Elizabeth Olsen’s eyes are so big and luminescent she might be part anime character.

• I MEAN THAT IN THE NICEST WAY POSSIBLE

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just-anka · 4 years ago

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It's 8 pm on a Friday, I finished work about 5 minutes ago, and my last act of the day was sending some new data to my supervisor in an email that I'm pretty sure told him exactly just how fried my brain is 🤣 so now is the ideal time for a PhD update, yes?

In short, PhD is still kicking my ass - the last few months have been full on, and there's more of that coming up. A few weeks ago I was whingeing to Ben about how every time I think I've got a more relaxed week coming, something else comes up/needs preparing for etc and he was like "I'm pretty sure that's the definition of grad school". I guess that's true. But it's the good kind of hard, you know? I'm still so excited about what I get to do every day.

Since January, I've been double busy with writing a paper with my predecessor PhD and planning and running a big screening experiment. Big experiment is now wrapped up and the data analysis is really fun, I love coding and it's given me a great mix of working from home and going into the lab - I'm really thriving on that and reaaaally wish we could keep that going past covid lockdowns. Sigh. The paper has been a bit of a rough road, but it's also finally getting close to being finished! I'm really proud of that.

In the next two months, I have my first presentation in our big lab meeting coming up (our whole department + another department, so many smart people), am presenting in a conference (even more scary BY FAR), am enrolled in two grad school courses, and hope to finish up the paper. Whew. After that I'll probably be ready for a couple weeks off lol, already dreaming of summer adventures

#ramble brought to you by my data analysis fried brain #I'm tired #personal #me #mine #grad school #phd stuff #phd #lab work #lab stuff #academia #molecular biology #zurich #switzerland

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perseusjackson-jasongrace · 4 years ago

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Empires on the Horizon XIV

Jason is a CEO: Part XIV

masterlist for other parts, more jercy, bad headcanons, and an abundance of crackships

SURPRISE!!! i finally got my laptop back and thankfully they didn’t have to wipe anything so i still had all my work! Between you and me i was more worried about all my fanfics than my uni work...... But I’ve learned my lesson. Do everything on google docs now!! Anyway this is a Percy POV and i hope you enjoy because i’ve missed this little universe more than you could possibly know and we’re finally (only fourteen chapters later) getting to the jercy part of this fic?! LOL it’s been wild.

i know i’m releasing a ton of fanfics at the moment so i hope you guys don’t feel overwhelmed. You know i adore your comments and thoughts but please don’t feel pressured to read all the fics i’m posting. I’ve just had a lot of time in the last weeks so it’s been easier to create. Please take care of yourself, i love you very much and i hope you have a magical holiday season!

Percy Jackson stretched his legs out in front of him and draped a blanket over them. There were few things he indulged in, but a good plane seat was one of them. He was spoilt for it but having the space to lay his unreasonably tall body down for eight hours seemed like a worthy investment. The announcements that continuously filtered through the crackly speakers were background noise as the bustle of people getting to their seats flowed throughout the cabins. He stared out his little window at the neon-jacketed guides and airport officials directing people to wherever they needed to be. He loved watching people just do things. There was something calming about knowing others weren’t interested in him in any way. That people got on with their lives despite the turmoil nobody knew about.

A flight attendant stopped next to him with a polite smile, “Champagne sir?”

“No thank you, a water please. Too early for alcohol.” He grimaced.

Mirth danced in her eyes as she glanced up at the rest of the passengers, some dangling flutes between their fingers. “Absolutely sir, anything else?”

He shook his head, before leaning back in his seat and closing his eyes. His pre-flight ritual, which consisted of him snuggling as comfortably as possible it his seat and trying to fall asleep, was already behind. The presence of a certain blonde-haired, blue-eyed CEO taking up the scattered pieces of his mind. It was crazy to think they had met almost a year ago, crazier still to think that about how much they had changed in that time. Percy at least felt like a completely different person to the one who had stepped off a plane from Hawaii all those months ago and attended his alma mater’s dinner. Although the university had surprised them with plaques honouring their contributions, it was seeing Jason Grace, learning about him that felt like the real reward. Hell, he was only half joking when he said he’d marry the guy the next Tuesday.

“Good morning ladies and gentlemen. Please take your seats and fasten your seatbelts. We will be taking off shortly. In the meantime please turn your attention to the screens in front of you for a video detailing the safety measures you will need to know while aboard this flight.”

He blinked back into the world and turned half his attention to the screen and the other half to locating the blonde he couldn’t seem to keep away from. He knew the safety briefings by heart, but he always felt bad for not paying attention. Someone worked hard to make those. He didn’t spot Jason in the two minutes the video played and then it was too late because the plane gave a low rumble and suddenly, they were lurching into motion. His heart climbed to his throat and he gripped his fingers underneath the blanket.

“Okay Percy,” He mouthed to himself, “You can do this. It’s at most fifteen minutes of instability and then you’ll be up in the air and you won’t even feel it.”

“Just fifteen minutes.” He kept repeating, taking deep shaky breaths. “Fifteen minutes.”

The plane jaggered down the runway, slow enough that he could still read the road signs indicating altitudes and compass directions and all sorts of fun information he didn’t care about. He felt the huge machine turn into the long stretch of tar that led them to the sky and his stomach clenched painfully. This was always the worst part. Take off. It felt like his entire body flew off with the plane while he stuck to the ground, superglue cementing him to the floor with no escape. He didn’t feel free. He felt torn.

The plane gave a horrible lurch and then it was screaming down the runway, grass and yellow lines blurring past them. They were going so fast he’s sure they’d break the sound barrier. He squeezed his eyes shut. Knuckles white as he twisted his hands together. The plan flew down the road and into the sky. His whole body felt suspended in space. He wanted to come down. He didn’t want to be here. Even with his eyes closed he could feel how high they were. He hated it.

Slowly, the plane started to level out until he felt his body realign: feet under him, hands beside him, head above him. He opened his eyes, spots dancing in his vision as they got used to the light once more. The seatbelt sign dinged above him, and a series of clicks followed. People got up to use the bathroom and grab things from the overhead compartments. He wasn’t going to get up until he was out of this plane. So he shoved his headphones over his ears and pressed play.

I will always love you how I do

Let go of a prayer for you

Just a sweet word

He gazed out the window, clouds close enough to whisper to, and his lips pulled up in a soft smile. The sky was beautiful. It just sucked that they had to get into a death trap to get to it. With his ocean eyes pinned to the balls of cotton hanging in the blue expanse his mind drifted. Reyna. He blinked. It was almost shameful how little he had thought of her since their breakup considering their year together. She had taught him tai quan do and baked him blueberry tarts. They had escaped to a little bubble in the forest and watched the leaves turn brown as they tumbled in bed. He knew she tapped her right foot when she was annoyed but her left fingers danced when she was excited. He knew she liked her eggs fried hard because she didn’t have time for sloppy yolk, but she liked them scrambled soft because it meant a richer croissant. But despite this she did not light his soul on fire. And he did not light hers either. They were merely striking matches without wood to burn. He heaved a sigh as he watched the threads of his relationship flutter before his eyes and fell asleep to them disappearing in gold strands leaking into the clouds. He succumbed to the bright sun and the soft warmth of memories and he didn’t wake until a loud announcement gave the signal that they were landing.

It was over so fast he didn’t have time to panic and he was grateful. Finally he was collecting his bags and walking out. A driver with his surname scribbled on a plaque stood front and center and with a quick flash of his ID and a hello they were piling into the car. He didn’t get a chance to see the blonde beauty, but the island was small and time was a plenty. They would find each other again.

“To the hotel sir?”

“Yes Luca, and then please stick around for half an hour. It’s just a quick freshen before I go to work. We have a lab meeting.”

The man nodded and then focused on the busy Italian streets they were navigating. He took in the colours and sounds as they whizzed by. It felt like a different universe. People were loud and excited and full of life and the little markets seemed to pull energy from the sun and direct it into joy. He wanted to tell Luca, to pull over, screw work, and take in the beauty of this little section of the world. But his phone buzzed in his pocket and he knew with a disappointed sinking in his chest that adventure would have to wait.

“Hello Percy,” Rachel Elizabeth Dare bubbled, ‘I assume you’ve arrived?”

“Yes Rach,” He sighed but amusement caught between his lips, “Have you got news for me?”

“No,” She sounded suspicious, “Why would I have news for you?”

“Because you only track my exact times when you want something but you’re too scared to ask me so you wait till I’m halfway across the country before asking.” He wanted to laugh as she made an indignant sound.

“Okay fine,’ She grumbled, “I wanted to know if I could close up the scuba for the weekend. I met a girl and i wanted to go out on Friday night with her.”

He couldn’t hold in his laugh any longer, “Of course you can Rachel. But I’m curious to know…” He trailed off.

“Ugh you are impossible.” He could imagine her eye roll so vividly. “It’s Clarisse. The principal from your old school.”

“Well, well, well,” He grinned, “I better be getting premium seats to the wedding.”

“Why does everything always end in weddings for you?” She groaned.

“Scuse me for wanting a happily ever after.” He scrunched his face, “Oh and guess who’s here?”

“Is this a good guess or a bad one?”

“Good.” He smiled, “Very good.”

She gasped, speaker crackling at his ear, “Tell me!”

“Jason Grace.”

“What?” She squealed, “Are you guys going to have hot rebound sex and then realise you like each other more than just casual fuck-buddies and end up getting married and adopting like six children?”

He burst with amusement, “Slow down there Rach. I know I throw around the marriage idea, but kids seem like a big commitment.”

“You right,” She said decidedly, “Kids are a lot of effort. Just get married then. But no eloping!” He pictured the crease in her freckled brows. “I want to be a bridesmaid.”

“Can’t promise anything,” He giggled.

“Perseus Jackson!” She scolded.

“Oof the full name.”

“I will tell your mother and she will kick your ass.”

“Okay, okay,” He laughed, “No eloping. I have to go. But remember to take the keys for the scuba with you. We do not need the fire department breaking the door again.”

She grumbled about hating him and then blew him a kiss and ended the call. With a smile still playing on his lips he thanked Luca and rushed into the hotel. Thankfully the check in was painless and fast and he was stumbling into his room in no time. He barely had time to appreciate the gorgeous floor-to-ceiling windows and the ocean view it laid out before him. He promised himself he would take the time when he got back.

Quickly he hopped into the shower cursing when he realised he’d forgotten to take his socks off. With a horrified shudder he peeled them off and chucked them into the laundry basket, thankful it gets emptied every day. The water beat against his back, fogging up the glass and calming the racing in his veins. He gave himself the luxury of one extra minute to just take a deep breath and screw his head back onto his shoulders and then he jumped out and shoved on a pair of black slacks and a white button down. He didn’t bother to do the top few buttons, figuring he’d have time in the car. Instead he fastened a watch to his wrists, rolled up the sleeves till they sat at his forearms– any attempt to bear the Italian heat– and then he slid his feet into a pair of sleek ankle boots and mussed his damp curls. With half a moments glance at the mirror to make sure his face didn’t have patches of sun-cream and his collar was straight he grabbed his briefcase and walked out.

Glancing at his watch distractedly he rounded the corner, only to bump right into a hard chest.

“Oh,” He frowned, stepping back into a door. “Jason.”

“Hey,” The blonde smiled, “What a coincidence?” He laughed.

“You’re staying here?” It was really starting to feel like the universe was trying to tell him something.

‘Yep,” He gave a shy smile, blue gaze bright. “Guess you’re going to see a lot more of me then you expected huh?”

“I think you may be at more of a disadvantage than me.”

Jason looked at him, eyes dragging from his face down his body and eventually dropping to his shoes. Percy gave an involuntary shiver as the blonde tracked the same slow pace back up. “I think this could be very advantageous.”

“If you don’t stop staring at me like that I’m going to be very late for my meeting.”

He laughed, the previous sultriness giving away to a sparkle and flashing white teeth, “See you around Jackson.” He started walking away.

“Wait!” Percy called, “Date? Tonight? We can explore the city together?”

Jason smiled as bright as diamonds, “Sounds fun. Meet you in the bar at?”

He realised their time depended on when his meeting finished and suddenly, he wanted to cancel the whole thing and start now. ‘Seven thirty?”

“See you there. And have a good meeting.”

The blonde walked away, and Percy felt this time like he was floating away while his body remained superglued to the floor. He wanted to live in this feeling. Because this did not feel like being torn apart. This felt like coming home.

The elevator dinged down the passage and he crashed back to reality. With a string of curse words he raced for it and jumped in just as the doors began to close.

The meeting and subsequent lab tour felt endless and he concentrated on little less than half of what was being said, his mind more interested on the things waiting for him at the hotel, the person. But eventually it was over and him and Luca were cruising towards the Casa de Vita.

“Anything else you need sir?” His driver looked at him from the rear-view mirror as they turned into the hotel road.

“Recommend any good places for a first date?”

“Already met a lady sir?” Luca’s dark eyebrows almost touched his hairline in surprise.

“A man actually.”

The Italian chuckled, nodding his head as if in on some invisible joke, “The Tesora. It is just down the path and near the ocean.”

“Thank you Luca, have a goodnight.”

“And you sir.” Luca winked before peeling out of the entrance and fading into the setting sun.

Percy strolled to his room with a smile on his face, lost in a world full of possibilities. It was unsurprising then that he didn’t see the extra bag against the wall, or the shoes neatly placed by the door that weren’t his.

He took off his watch and undid the few buttons on his shirt, head lost to the glimmer of the ocean. He let his shirt fall open as he slipped off his shoes and walked towards the windows. The view really was spectacular. No matter how much he travelled it always blew his mind the places that existed, that he had yet to learn of. It was irresistible. It was perfect. It didn’t fail to cross his mind that the ocean was the exact same colour as a certain pair of gorgeous blue eyes. He blinked the image away, turning around, and his gaze landed on that exact aquamarine gaze.

“Jason?” He gasped, clutching his chest in surprise. “What are you doing in my room?”

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Tags (if you want to be added/taken off the tag list just let me know. All my channels of communication are open):

@lesbian-peanuts

@leydiangelo

@queen-of-demons-and-hell

@msdrpreist

@sparkythunderstorm

@nishlicious-01

@lucyisblue

@pjo-hp-things

#empires on the horizon #part 14 #jercy #jason is a ceo #jason grace #percy jackson #baby fanfic #baby fanfic series #pjssg fanfic #pjssg series #pjjg fanfic #pjjg series #jason #grace #percy #jackson

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makeste · 5 years ago

Text

BnHA Chapter 268: Please Don’t Tap on the Glass

Previously on BnHA: Dabi revealed his true identity to Hawks! His real name is actually [sound of semi truck horns blaring]. What’s that? You didn’t hear me? I said it’s [sound of dolphins chattering]. You really need to listen better. Anyway, so Dabi set Hawks on fire a bunch of times, and Hawks had some flashbacks indicating that Endeavor saved him when he was a small child, and just when it was starting to look like we might get our second tragic death chapter in a row, Tokoyami showed up to defend his mentor! Meanwhile in Jakku, Miruko remembered that even though kicking ass is fun and she’s really good at it, she still had a job to do, so she sped off toward Ujiko’s little hideaway, getting stabbed and impaled a bunch of times along the way and losing an ear and shit (I very much look forward to the cyberpunk robot-limbed Miruko 2.0 that we had better fucking get once this arc is over). Fortunately Endeavor showed up to help her out! Anyway, so absolutely no one was talking about this last week, but the chapter totally ended with Miruko about to bust open Tomura’s bacta tank with a badass roundhouse kick, so, uh. Shit might be about to go down you guys.

Today on BnHA: Shit does indeed go down, but at a very languid pace. Ujiko apparently built Tomura’s holding tank out of Nokia phones and kevlar, so even though Miruko gets a few good kicks in, she ultimately doesn’t do more than just crack it. So now the tank is just standing there leaking ominously while Ujiko sobs for no reason and we all ponder whether or not a 75%-charged Tomura will be any less doom-harbinging than the full-fledged deal. In the meantime we’ve got Girl Noumu thinking strategic thoughts and chucking acid at peeps; Crust still doing absolutely nothing; Endeavor not doing that much better to be honest; and Mic and Aizawa ready and raring to go kill the old man who turned their dead buddy into a sentient Einstein-Rosen bridge. Obviously I’m all in favor of this last bit, but I’m also on team “Mic and Aizawa not dying horribly” though, so. I do have some concerns here.

full disclosure, I’m very sleep-deprived for various reasons related to various things which can be broadly summed up as Just 2020 In General. so anyway, I’m dealing with it, but I’ve noticed that my rate of typos and errors and such has shot waaaaay up in this past week or so, so I’m just putting that out there that you may find some weird shit in this post! maybe I will write the same sentence maybe I will write the same sentence multiple times, or or the same word twice in a row by mistake, or use the completely wrong word. you are more than welcome to point this out and I will not take any offense and will indeed be grateful because I’ve apparently gone blind to it all! anyway so how are you I hope everyone is well

anyway! the chapter is early (god for all I know it’s been out for hours already. HOW FAR BEHIND AM I) so I’m recapping it early so that I will have more time to play Animal Crossing and fish and craft all of my troubles away. speaking of which Horikoshi, you had better not bring me any troubles this week, I am not in the mood do you hear

good fucking lord

is all of that Miruko’s blood??!? god, she’s even better at bleeding than everyone else. now hold up all you excited vampires, you all can get in line, I was here first

by the way Endeavor, I gave you a pass last week because your entrance was so fucking raw and you saved my girl’s life and that was really neat my man. but now that I’ve recovered from my shock and awe and am ready to be sarcastic once more, I just want to say... welcome to the party, guy. did you stop for drive-thru on your commute from the other side of the planet. were you simply not immune to the bizarre 5th dimensional time-stands-still effects of March 2020. are you curious at all how your son has changed during these past 20 years, and by “son” I am referring not to Dabi, but Shouto. are you looking forward to meeting all of Shouto’s children. are you excited to be a granddad. anyway thank you so fucking much for finally making your way down to this lair with all the speed and haste of a federal appeals process

and I see Crust is still fighting this guy after six decades

(ETA: I would be more upset about the scan quality here, but let’s face it, nobody actually cares about seeing this in HD. I’m sorry Crust.)

and we’re really expected to believe this is the very next ranked hero below Miruko. could it be that the hero ranking system is actually flawed. don’t tell me. I’m just as shocked as you are

seriously??

are we really going to stop and chat with Geriatric Hero: Crust over here. really. far be it from me to tell you how to do your job, Number One. but I’m just saying, I’m pretty sure he does still have... let’s just check... one... two... yep, two arms. not that I’m saying your system for prioritizing which of your fellow heroes to help out should be based off of the number of arms they have. but also I am saying that

OH SONNY BOY

is that a two-page panel of Aizawa Hatake Kakashi Shouta and his loyal husband Screaming Man leaping into the fray to take on some high end Noumus with their bad and sexy selves. I think that’s exactly what it is. are we blessed or are we blessed. Aizawa I’m pleased to see you haven’t aged a day and are looking just as fine as ever in this the year 2045

oh wow Endeavor I thought you had incinerated it

why wouldn’t you incinerate it. please incinerate it. did you not learn your lesson. please don’t start taking your cues from Dilly Dally Hero: Crust over here

oh wow

and yet Miruko was kicking all of their asses like they were made of plywood. really though guys. only number five. okay

Aizawa’s shouting that he wasn’t able to erase that last Noumu who was impaling Miruko because his vision was obstructed. that’s okay Aizawa, that’s why Endeavor is hopefully about to incinerate him

oh snap here we go

again, one has to wonder what kinds of interactions with rabbits Horikoshi has had in his troubled young life so as to influence his writing of Miruko’s quirk in such a way. did you at some point get rabbits confused with... I don’t even know. polar bears?! not that I’m fucking complaining holy shit

anyway, so just a friendly reminder that if Miruko dies here I will in fact push the button which triggers the hidden ejector seat built into Horikoshi’s office chair. he will be missed. but he had a good run

ho lyyyyyyy shit

so... Miruko I love you but... then why would you break the fucking vat apart with your moon-powered legs. Miruko. Miruko are you listening. oh shit she’s missing an ear I forgot. oh shit. oh shit

MIRUKO I LOVE YOU SO MUCH BUT WHY THE FUCK DIDN’T YOU JUST KICK THE BALD MAN IN THE LAB COAT INSTEAD goddammit well it’s been nice knowing y’all

well then. so this is happening. this is really happening. at least she saved us all from having to face the 100%-charged world-ending Tomura somewhere down the line. instead all we have to do is face the 74%-charged Tomura right fucking now. so that’s. ...I wonder how Tokoyami is doing

holy shit!

leave it to Girl Noumu to be the smart one. for a minute I thought maybe Ujiko had given her Ragdoll’s long-lost quirk. but then I realized that this isn’t a quirk at all, this is just her being smart and using her Big Noumu Brain. anyway so I’m preemptively sorry for having to root against you, Girl Noumu

so now she’s pondering how to disable Aizawa’s quirk. meanwhile I just remembered that we haven’t seen her quirk yet I think. please let it be something good

oh snap she ran away and made it out of Aizawa’s sight range oh fuck

the fuck is up with this thicc fucking Girl Noumu page I can’t tell wtf is going on

LOL OH SHIT

NOT TO WORRY GUYS SHE’S JUST SHOOTING BIG GIANT GLOBS OF ACID AT EVERYONE. can anyone tell if Endeavor has incinerated this Noumu yet down in the middle panel on the left. what is the fucking holdup

and now there’s a big double page of Miruko shattering Tomura’s Noumu Vat, and I can’t quite tell, but it looks like her eyes might be rolling back in a way which I decidedly do not like

(ETA: nah on closer inspection we’re good.)

didn’t she just do this like four pages ago. and how the hell did Tomura suddenly jump from 74% to 75% in like .2 seconds

oh thank god she’s still awake. but now she’s being dragged back now by the Noumu’s bone appendage things because Endeavor SERIOUSLY CANNOT GET HIS FUCKING ACT TOGETHER LONG ENOUGH TO FUCKING LIGHT ITS BRAIN TO ASHES ALREADY, LIKE SERIOUSLY THOUGH. WHAT HAPPENED TO ALL OF THAT TALK ABOUT THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING FAST AND THE DIFFERENCE A SPLIT SECOND MAKES

Miruko if we make it out of this alive, I’m promoting you to number one. Fatgum will be number two. the only two pro heroes in this arc who have actually impressed me at all. shame on the rest of you. shame

so now somehow or some way Miruko is being flung into Endeavor at the speed of light

I don’t understand this at all. did the Noumu retract those bone whips back into its body superfast while dragging Miruko back with them and somehow it managed to avoid being hit by her projectile body but Endeavor took the impact straight on. this doesn’t make any kind of sense to me with my admittedly rudimentary understanding of physics. but then again it is a fucking manga so I’m not about to call NASA and ask them if this could really happen. so this was a waste of a paragraph I guess!! my bad!!

swear to god this is like the fifth panel of Ujiko just screaming. please just stop. what do you have to be worried about anyway? although if Tomura suddenly went crazy upon awakening and just straight up killed you for no reason, that sure would be delightful! that wouldn’t happen, though. or would it

WHAT IS THIS FUCKING FISH TANK MADE OF

IS THIS A TUBE OF GLASS OR A FUCKING FALLOUT SHELTER

ENDEAVOR I’M GLAD YOU’RE CONCERNED ABOUT MIRUKO BECAUSE I AM TOO, AND ALSO IT’S ALWAYS NICE TO SEE THAT YOU DO HAVE A HEART, BUT ALSO MAYBE JUST LEAVE HER FOR NOW THOUGH, SERIOUSLY??

though on the other hand it’s already too late to stop this inevitable tide, so maybe at this point they should all just get the fuck out of there instead. at least Miruko did her fucking job and saved you all from having to face the invincible unstoppable version. that’ll be a real comfort to everyone when he’s out laying waste to the countryside, I’m sure. but still

-- oh no

the boys heard that. listen you guys, I want Ujiko to die as much as anyone, but I’m gonna need you to not go anywhere near Shigaraki fucking Tomura now or ever. please. do you hear me?? you two still have both of your ears goddammit I want some acknowledgement

-- NO!!!

(ETA: is that. a fucking Tomura dialogue bubble. something stirs in the east. a sleepless malice. the eyes of the enemy are moving.)

THE MANGA GIVETH AND THE MANGA TAKETH AWAY nooooo from 20 pages last week back down to the usual 17. I got spoiled. I expected too much. sob

so now we settle in to wait two weeks to see if Mic’s piercing tones can shatter this fucking adamantium tank like a wine glass. I’m not sure I’m ready for the Noumuraki Tomuracalpse you guys. then again by this point I’m braced for just about anything though so bring it

#bnha 268 #miruko #mirko #I finally caved and did it both ways #endeavor #aizawa shouta #present mic #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste spoiler recap #makeste reads bnha #happy easter everyone #don't mention it to horikoshi though #he's terrified of rabbits as we all know #they are vicious and unstoppable #so please treat them with respect

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populationpensive · 4 years ago

Text

Vacation

Spent the past week in the resident side of the unit because another new hire started and nice she is straight out of school, she needs a bit more guidance. So, I got to have a somewhat vacation because the resident side was overstaffed, i.e. significantly lower pt load for me. And my friend works there so we got to lurk around together!

I casually had a patient who went into asymptomatic Vtach yesterday. He was more disturbed that he went from no one in his room to like 4 people in his room. Got some labs and an ECG which were pretty unremarkable except for a prolonged Qtc. We put this dude on some olanzepine and haldol at night because he gets EXTREMELY agitated at night. I don't blame him - he's been bed bound for weeks due to an unstable spinal fracture (long ass story of why that isn't fixed yet). But having him on a precedex drip all the time isn't exactly...sustainable. Anyway, the antipsychotics definitely helped a little but unfortunately got pulled because of the prolonged Qtc. *shrug*.

I maintain that he would benefit the most from an SSRI or buspar. When psychiatry was brought on board they weren't down with this idea. It's actually a bone I have to pick with our psych service and I saw this shit on burn all the time. In these polytrauma patients with a long course of recovery and high risk of depression/anxiety, there is ZERO reason to wait to prescribe these medications. Zero. Our psych team will sit there and be like "meh this is classified as adjustment disorder in the DSM V so no SSRIs" and it drives me up the wall. It just means we end up putting them on shit that isn't helpful (or worst don't prescribe anything) and waste time waiting for SSRIs to kick in when they are finally willing to prescribe. In burn when I was following these patients for months, I'd often just start them on an SSRI at burn week 2-3 (with permission of my staff and the pt/family) because it takes weeks for these meds to kick in. The patients are usually intubated and sedated the first two weeks anyway. *sigh* Anyway.

I'll be with the palliative care service all week. Kind of excited about being able to sleep in since I don't need to report to work until 0830 (my shifts start at 0630), but I'm also just going to wander/shadow them. I am concerned I will get bored. Our palliative care service is fabulous at my hospital - they really are instrumental in an ICU setting to put the focus on the patient and their wishes. I value that a lot. But I'm also probably not going to have any active role in their conversations so it's just not going to be...involved?

Completely unrelated, I am thinking about getting a new iPad. I've had my mini since 2017 when I started rotations. It's held up well and I needed the small one in school because it fit in my white coat pocket easily. Now I just want a bigger screen lol. Some of the apps crash on me randomly and it doesn't hold a charge anymore. But, since Mr Poppen and I just bought solar panels for our house, I think I might have to wait on the new iPad. \_o_/

#pa-c #pablr #physician assistant #physician associate #pre-pa #pa school #pa-s #medblr #medicine #critical care pa-c #originstory

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abrunettefangirlnerd · 6 years ago

Text

Everything I Need

Request: So can I request one where Tony x reader. Where their little daughter interrupt and being naughty and all that lol . Just a cute family fluff. Thank you!

Pairing: Tony x Reader, daughter

Warnings: Cuteness

“I wanna see daddy!” Your daughter exclaims from her bed. “I wanna see daddy!”

Walking over to Rylen you pick her up. Placing the 2 year old against your hip, you push her already unruly curls from her face. Every other aspect of her reminds you of her father, your husband, Tony Stark. The curls she inherited from you, but the sparkling eyes of wonder and need to get what she wants is all her father.

“Daddy’s busy sweetie.” You carry her toward her playroom. “We are going to play in here till he is all done. How does that sound?”

“I want you both to play,” Rylen’s eyes start to droop towards the floor with tears filtering behind them.

This girl really knows how to pull at your heart strings, anyone’s really. Last week you caught Happy sneaking her three cookies all because of the eyes she gave him. With Tony all she needs is to bat an eyelash and he is wrapped around her little baby finger. It has been this way since the moment she was born.

Tony was excited but terrified of becoming a father. He wants to be better than his dad, wants to make sure that Rylen knowns she is loved, wants her every need to be taken care of. While you loved him for this, it has also caused problems. Whoever said you can’t spoil a baby was clearly mistaken. You can spoil a baby, and you were the only one strong enough to withstand your precious baby’s tactics… for the most part.

“Honey do we have any-“

“I got it, I got it.” Tony’s voice trails behind you in the kitchen.

Seconds later he holds two jars, one containing pickles while the other contains mustard. It is one of the many weird craving you have had since the beginning of the pregnancies and it wont be the last, but this is your favorite.

“Please tell me that when you come out mommy will go back to eating normal food.” He speaks toward your belly.

Smacking him, you both laugh. About the same time the baby starts to kick. Reaching for your husband’s hand you place it on your belly. Surprised at the force Tony slightly jumps but places his other hand on the area as well.

Sometimes you’re scared that he will think this is all too much. That he’s not ready and leave. Though looking at him right now causes all those fears to run out the door. Tears form against his eyes as he feels his child moving. Looking up at you, you see nothing but love and adoration toward you and the baby.

“I love you,” he whispers placing a kiss against your lips. “I love you,” he clears his throat and kisses your belly.

The odd silence pulls you from your memory. Scanning the room you find the Legos that Rylen was playing with only a moment ago abandoned on the floor. Looking behind the rocking chair and the play kitchen you find the room absent of your daughter.

“Rylen,” you huff as you realize where she is going.

Tony’s Pov

The meeting is long and boring, just like any other meeting he has had this past week. All he wants to do is be with his wife and child or in the lab while they are napping. Tony does not want to miss a single moment of Rylen growing up. He was there for her birth, her first words, her first steps. He wants to be there for everything, every heartbreak that is bound to happen in the future, every science fair, and every goofy creative thing she does every day.

“What are you going to do if she doesn’t become a billionaire genius like you?” (Y/N) teases from the doorway.

She watches as Tony holds their three month old child in his arms with as much wonder as he did the day Rylen was born. Their daughter lies asleep in his arms. Tony loves watching her sleep. The way her face scrunches up every once in a while makes his heart flutter, and he loves being here when she wakes up. Loves the way she searches for him and her mother.

“Honestly, if she wanted to join the circus I would be more than willing to let her.” Tony glances up for a moment at his wife. “I just want her to be happy, and I want to encourage her to do what makes her happy.”

“Daddy!” A small familiar voice exclaims. “Daddy daddy daddy!”

Little Rylen appears by her father’s side arms stretched wanting to be picked up. Tony easily obliges and rests her on his lap. She buries her head into him as she wraps her small arms around his neck.

“Rylen!” He hears (Y/N)’s voice from the hall. Walking in she stops noticing the audience, “sorry for the interruption. This one has a habit of trying to get what she wants.”

Tony’s smile widens as he takes in the sight of his wife. His sleep deprived, frazzled, short of breath, pajama all-day wearing, beautiful wife. (Y/N) has been by his side through everything. She saw him change from an arrogant ass to the man he is today, and he credits it all to her. (Y/N) was always able to bring him back to reality during his panic attacks, able to show him that there is more to love in the world than hate. She’s the women that brought his amazing daughter into the world.

“Uh oh,” he turns his attention to his daughter. “Has someone been bad?”

“No,” she sheepishly shakes her head.

Tony shoots (Y/N) a wink and wraps his arms around his daughter. Mouthing I’ll take care of it he turns Rylen around so she’s facing the table.

“Time to give mommy a break,” he whispers in Rylen’s ear. “(Y/N) go rest or go out with your friends. I have this covered.”

Blowing a kiss his direction, (Y/N) mouths a thank you back Tony’s way before closing the door. Looking back down at his daughter, he finds her head tilted far back enough to see him.

“Now are we going to run like that from mommy again?” He asks.

“No daddy,” she sniffles realizing she has been caught.

“That’s my good girl.” Tony kisses the top of his daughter’s head before resuming the meeting.

Tag: @vesta-ro

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hogwarts--imagines · 7 years ago

Text

Control

GIF NOT MINE

Bruce X Reader

kiri-hakumei said: I really love the idea of a Bruce x reader that has the reader with some rage. I can get really angry when someone is outright a jerk and rage. I see red and start getting aggressive and spewing really mean awful things and have to try really hard to reel myself in. So I was wondering how Bruce could help the reader during a blowup and then after when she has to go to the lab to calm down in a corner? I’m sorry if that is too specific lol

A/N: I can get the same way lol

Warnings: Swearing

All I wanted to do was have a good day. I woke up in a decent mood. I didn’t have a reason to be upset, so why should I be in a bad mood?

I worked with the Avengers for three years. It was hard, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. I got along with everyone and we were all like a family. The only time everyone left me alone was on days where the littlest things set me off. This has been happening a lot lately. Anger was not my best quality. I was hurtful to others, saying rude things or pointing out their worst quality. I tried to work on it, I avoided everyone, not wanting to hurt them verbally.

“Going for a walk” I told everyone “Probably going to go to the cafe. Anyone want to join or want anything?”

“I’ll come, if that’s alright” Wanda gave a small smile. The last time we spoke I said some hurtful things. I have yet to apologize and now would be a good time.

“Of course!” I grabbed her jacket as well as mine. “We could spend some time together. Anyone else?”

“No but thank you” Steve looked at us worriedly but smiled. Everyone else said no as well.

“Okay” I put my jacket on and we left. We made our way out of the Tower.

“So Wanda” I broke the silence between us, she looked at me “I want to apologize for what I said the other day. You are a wonderful person and you abilities are amazing and not a flaw.”

“I accept your apology. I know how you get when you are mad.” She smiled, squeezing my arm.

“It doesn’t make it okay though.” I put my hands in my pocket. We approached the cafe and made our way inside.

We got our drinks and made our way to a table, but before we got to the table and man plowed into Wand spilling her drink all over herself.

“Watch it bitch” the man snapped at her.

“Watch your attitude asshole.” I snapped back standing in front of Wanda.

“What are you gonna do?” He stepped closer to me looking down at me trying to intimidate me.

“Want to stick around to find out?” I folded me arms. “Giving you two choices, One you can apologize to my friend and leave, or two, I can force you out.”

Instead of answering he shoved me into Wanda, knocking us both down. I stood up and punched him in the face, then shoving him out of the cafe. The barista yelled at me and Wanda to get out and to not come back for starting a fight. Before I could say anything, Wanda forced me to leave.

“I could have handled that” I snapped at her.

“I know, you did a good job protecting me, but I want to get back and change out of this coffee stained shirt.” She gave me a lame excuse.

“But they blam-”

“Just let it go. When we get back go punch the punching bag in the gym.” Wanda cut me off. Dragging me back to the Tower.

“You should’ve let me kick his ass” I argued with her as we walked into the kitchen.

“Well I didn’t want to get into anymore trouble.” She spoke calmly before shoving me onto the stool. “Cool off, and I’m gonna go change.”

“Fine” I rolled my eyes. Sam was leaning on the counter looking at me. “Got a problem?” I snapped.

“Nope” He sipped his coffee

“Then why the fu-”

“Hey y/n can we talk?” Bruce cut me off.

“Why?” I had a hard time being mean to him. No matter how mad I was, I was always nicer to him. I noticed the smirk forming on Sam’s lips. I flipped him off.

“Let’s go.” He ordered. I reluctantly got up, following the man into the Lab. “The past few weeks I can’t help but notice how angry you have been getting at everyone and everything.”

“I have not!” I got defensive

“I wouldn’t say anything if it wasn’t true.” He sat on top of his desk. “You and I both know the truth.”

“You don’t understand” I looked at him, pulling up his chair and sitting on it.

“Oh but I do” He got down and put his hands on the armrest standing over you. “You know damn well that I understand anger. Want to ask the green guy?”

“No, but maybe he could learn to cool it too” I spoke sarcastically.

“Y/n”

“Bruce”

“When you get mad, walk into another room, leave everyone alone. Bite your tongue because pretty soon you will lose friends, actions speak louder than words. I know you apologized to Wanda and she told me that you are pissed because that man was rude to her and you defending her, which I’m proud that you stuck up for her. But it’s done and over with, so stop being so angry.” Bruce looked into my eyes.

“I know I need to work on it, I’ve been trying. To work on it but my anger gets the best of me. Has been like this for years. I don’t want to lose you guys. I try to hold it in and bring myself back to normal and it’s hard.” I teared up.

“I know. I really do. Next time just come and find me. I’ll be here in the lab or in my room.” He lifted my chin up forcing me to look at him.

I always had a thing for this man. He was always so calm. He understood me more than I understood myself. We weren’t super close but we were friends. I wish it would have been more but like me, his anger can get the best of him so he probably wouldn’t want to date someone who could make him angry when they were angry.

“You know” He started talking again, “I will have to admit, seeing you angry sometimes is a tad bit of a turn on.” He winked.

“What?” my eyes widened. I was not expecting that.

“Maybe after few sessions with me, you could have more control of that temper” He smirked before walking away. Leaving me confused and blushing on the chair.

“Bruce!” I yelled after him. “You can’t just say something like that and walk away all casually.” I snapped at him once I caught up to him before he walked out of the lab.

“Why not? What are you gonna do about it?” He stepped closer to me. Pushing me against the wall. I didn’t say anything, I pulled him closer and kissed him.

Our lips moved in sync. He wrapped his hands around my waist as I ran my hand through his hair and pulled him deeper into the kiss. The longer we kissed the more heated it got. Finally he pulled away, his warmth going with him.

“You might want to stay and cool off, you seem to be getting to heated. I don’t want to set you off.” He smiled innocently before quickly leaving the room.

“You little shit” I yelled running after him.

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patchworktail · 7 years ago

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ITS 4:30 AM AND I DONT FEEL LIKE SLEEPING so I’m gonna do this meme that i got tagged for twiCE and totally forgot to do til now!!!! (i had 2 dig through your blogs to find them omg)

ANYWAY i was tagged by both @mooitstimdrake and @cynessie (I MISS U BOTH BTW ❤)

RULES: Share 11 facts about yourself, answer 11 questions provided by the tagger, tag 11 awesome people and leave 11 questions for them to answer!

(I’m gonna skip tagging people/asking 11 questions - 1) because I’m lazy 2) because a lot of people who I would tag either have already been tagged or woN’T DO IT and 3) I have to answer two sets of 11 questions anyway so I’ll let one of those sets take the place of my 11 questions!!)

11 Facts

I was supposed to leave to move into my college 3 days ago but since my college is in Savannah they pushed off move-in/orientation for a weEK BECAUSE OF HURRICANE IRMA AND I’M STILL UPSET/DISAPPOINTED

That being said I’m about to start as a college freshman at art school, planning on majoring in animation! :D

I binged all of Buzzfeed Unsolved in like 2 days and I fuckin LOVE IT

Also BNHA is like my current main obsession???? I fell in love w that anime and uhhhh I’d Die For My Kids

I almost never use skype anymore - I’m always on Discord now (mutuals may add me just message me if you want my tag :3c)

I loooove creating OCs and my main OC is a forest elf named Rally and he’s precious and I LOVE HIM AND COULD TALK ABOUT HIM FOR HOURS (also my best friend @/harpxer and I have a huge ongoing rp with him and her mountain elf oc, Kahl!! they’re really gay)

Hmmm fun fact I guess I’ve been involved with internet communities since I was 10 years old and I made my very first internet friend when I was 10 and we’re still great friends and talk p much every day to this day (hi @/fiishr)

I want a tattoo super bad but idk what I’d geT

I worked at a jewelry engraving stand at an amusement park this summer and one night I accidentally gave myself a 1st degree burn on my finger from the hot glue gun and it hurt So Bad

I had my graduation party this July and it was really fun but the best part was when 14 of us played this giant game of spoons and it got really intense, made worse by people randomly screaming during it, and then we collectively decided to blast hardcore rap music from the speakers and Let Me Tell You i have not been involved in a more stressful card game in my LIFE

I’ll always always always fall for the hero/happy character/protagonist basically....idk what it is about me but I’m so Predictable...I love cute optimistic brave characters who just wanna do Right.....I don’t cARE IF PEOPLE THINK THEY’RE BORING I THINK THEY’RE PERFECT AND AMAZIGN AND I LOVE THEM

AS FOR AN EXTRA 12TH FACT ABOUT ME AS U CAN SEE I WRITE WAY TOO MUCH AND ALSO I’M THE BIGGEST OVERSHARER E V E R IT’S SO BAD SOMEONE STOP ME

ANYWAY ONTO THE QUESTIONS :3c

@mooitstimdrake‘s Questions:

If you were to make a new blog dedicated to one single thing (fandom, hobby/activity, etc) what would it be? Honestly, right at the moment probably BNHA!!!! it’s legit my most recent big obsession and I love it?? so much???

If you could have any kind of animal as a pet, what would you have? A RACCOON!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE THEM SOSOSOSOSOS MUCH and some people actually do have them as pets! They can be difficult though but WORTH IT

Who was your favorite teacher and why were they your favorite? OH BOY......I’m gonna say it’s a tie between my AP studio art teacher and my AP US government teacher from this past year, my senior year! My AP art teacher because our class was super tiny, 12 kids, and it really felt like a family?? She was a-okay with letting us all goof around and say weird shit, she was really chill and funny and like. part teacher, part friend, which was always nice. As for my AP gov teacher, he was SO. FUCKING. FUNNY. OH MAN. NOT EVEN ON PURPOSE he just like? put up with SO MUCH? we had some real character kids in that class and my teacher’s reactions were HILARIOUS. he had a sarcastic streak too so his responses were equally as funny when someone did something weird. He would say the funniest stuff just ask @/harpxer I would tell her so many stories from that class sohboshrb. Aside from the humor that class was really interesting, and he’s a really good, invested teacher - he wanted us to learn, he’s super passionate about government and history, and he always started off each class with 2 current events which was really nice and helped me learn more about things happening in the world too!!! overall that was like my fav non-art class I’ve ever taken!!!!

What’s your guilty pleasure (and I’m challenging you not to say some kind of food)? HMMMMM. Honestly I’m gonna go ahead and say really cheesy or lame movies/shows (like, Disney channel movies, dumb shows - like the one summer I watched all of Glee LOL, stuff like that). Like yeah I know 90% of it is terRIBLE but it’s still amusing/lighthearted stuff that makes me happy KLSDJVLSDHB

Favorite pizza topping? EXTRA CHEESE IF THAT COUNTS, if not then pepperoni!!

What’s the last thing you bought (that wasn’t food)? I’ve actually been buying a lot the past few weeks in prep for college/spending a little money for ONCE since I worked all summer. I got a bunch of boring stuff but the things I’m most excited about are: two posters I got for my dorm (The Office is one and one is Lord Huron), a giant wall tapestry (it’s Up themed!!!), tWO BNHA/POKEMON CHARMS THAT CAME TODAY AND EVERY TIME I LOOK AT THEM I START CRYING BC THEYRE SO CUTE, and oh my GOD I BOUGHT THIS GIANT PILLOW FROM TARGET AND IT IS THE SINGLE SOFTEST THING I’VE EVER FELT AND IT’S HUGE AND IT IMMEDIATELY BECAME MY #1 COMFORT OBJECT AND TOP FIVE FAV THINGS IVE EVER BOUGHT!!!!!! I guess MOST recently though I just bought Clip Studio Paint online today (art program) since it’s on sale for 50% off and I’ve heard great things about it!

What upcoming movies/tv shows are you looking forward to? UHHHHH as for movies... justice league part 1, the incredibles 2, kingsman 2, the neW POKEMON MOVIE I CHOOSE YOU, probably a lot more I can’t remember rn. AS FOR SHOWS HMMM I’m...excited for the next season of the good place and izombie, and oh I’m excited for the punisher netflix show!! and the next season of voltron of COURSE!!! and next season of stranger things!! probably more I’m forgetting too tbh

Any recommendations (this could be anything just throw your best pitch at me)? JFISDJKLBJ I DON’T KNOW OMG tbh rachel you watch a lot of the same things I do already LMAOOO

What’s your favorite thing to wear that you own? OH FUCK I DUNNO HMMM I really like wearing my various leggings and scarves, but as like a Single Item....I like wearing....uhhhh I have this giANT sweater like it’s WAY too big for me but it’s so COMFY and I love it. I also love wearing my Star Labs sweatshirt bc it’s soft and comfortable

What was your first pet? my cat!!! we took her in as a stray kitten living in our backyard when I was like. 2 or 3 and so we’ve basically had her my whole life!!

If you could learn any language, what would it be? UHHHHHH honestly probably spanish - I took it 4 straight years and was okay at it in class but one year went by with me not taking it and I forgot everything LOOOL I’m...bad....at languages....

@cynessie‘s Questions:

Where is the coolest place you’ve ever been? I haven’t been many cool places :( I guess the coolest isssss I dunno it depends? Lake George is where I go on vacation every year, I LOVE NYC, I love Savannah too and it’s where I’m gonna be for college so?? ?? ? ? I’VE NEVER BEEN OUT OF THE COUNTRY AND I’M SAD BUT I’M POOR AND CAN’T AFFORD IT

What was the first thing you remember wanting to be when you grew up? veterinarian!!

Look to your right. What do you see? a dirty plate on my desk, my bed just past that, and my CHARMS THAT CAME TODAY THAT ARE SO CUTE I CRY EVERY TIME I SEE THEM

What are you procrastinating on? ajkldjboidj lik e 4 art commissions,,,, and 7 MAP parts,,,, and my pre-work for 2 of my classes,,,,,,,and cleaning my room,,,, and sending thank-you notes to relatives,,, SOMEONE KICK MY ASS AND MAKE ME DO SHIT

Which family member are you closest too and what is their name? UHHHH.... I guess my younger brother Luke? or maybe my mom? I’m not on bad terms with anyone though, I love both my older brothers too and we all have a good sibling relationship I just talk more with my younger bro I think - second closest would be with my second older brother Connor!

What’s the last song you listened to? I’m listening to Ultralife by Oh Wonder right now :3c I’ve been on a huUUGE Oh Wonder kick lately!!

What do you generally carry in your bag/pockets when you go out? my wallet (w my license and money and debit card and all), travel size lotion, phone, and chap stick!!

What is one thing you are excited for? FINALLY GETTING TO COLLEGE NEXT WEEK AND STARTING CLASSES FJIODFHINBDFHBNSBO

Do you believe in ghosts? I’m gonna hesitantly say YES but I’m not 100% convinced I don’t think

What is a skill you want to learn? MAYBE THIS IS WEIRD but I think learning how to act would be kinda neat. On a more realistic note I wish I could learn to exercise without dying

Tell me a joke. I’M BAD AT JOKES DON’T DO THIS TO ME NESSIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SO YEAH THAT’S ALL FOLKS it’s 5am now...Nice..... :’) I love my ability to stay up obscenely late while also getting Nothing Done JLSDNVDHAGHVDLAK

#about me #my life #hell ya i havent done one of these in a while but it was FUN #sorry for not tagging anyone......im lazy.............

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idealisticrealism · 8 years ago

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Blindspot 2x19 recap

(Aka the Scavenger hunt)

(Aka both Zapata and Shepherd getting arrested and Reade coming back and Patterson being adorable and Jeller ALMOST-KISSING AAAAAHHHHHHHH)

Well, here it is at last. This recap should have been posted a week ago, after already having been delayed by all the fic-writing, but just as it was aaaalmost done, my computer crashed and lost the whole damn thing. So here’s take 2 haha, and I’ll try to get my 2x20 recap up tomorrow, if I’m lucky...

(Warning: extreme flailing ahead)

Well, here’s to the amount of deja vu I’m about to experience lol. And just a note-- I’m gonna speed through the Shepherd scenes bc frankly I don’t care about them in the slightest. And so speaking of which, we're back in Bangkok and Shepherd’s using all the ominous language about how the guy should avoid the western world and blah blah she totally thinks she's so badass, yet she has no idea that the western world-- or specifically, the Weller & Patterson bro-sis combo, is about to Strike Back (;P). And so while she's acting tough and threatening the sellers of the toxic stuff, these two precious little catburglars are stealing all of her ill-gotten money. I love Patterson being about to go into a complex explanation of how, and Weller being all "Don't explain. Just type." haha. Aw, my little partners in crime. And then Patterson succeeds in freezing the account, causing all hell to break loose for Shepherd, bullets flying, her entire little posse getting shot down and she herself barely escaping with her life (though damn, for a middle-aged lady she sure still got some moves)-- and back in the lab, Weller and Patterson are just sitting there like.... 'well that was anticlimactic' hahahaha. Oh, if only you knew how much you had just ruined Shepherd's day lol. You would be as delighted as I am. Also damn she just went all Terminator on this guy, only to get nabbed by the cops which is SO satisfying even though we know she'll get free soon enough. But still, anything that pisses Shepherd off is just fine by me lol

Looollll it's the Right Boob Snake! I assume you guys heard the story from last year's SDCC panel, but in case you didn’t, the gist of it was that this tattoo is Rob's favourite because each tattoo is kept in a separately labelled storage container thing and this one is labelled with 'Right boob snake'. Also I love that we have literally never seen the team use a CG graphic of the tattoos until now, when it's one in a 'private area', which is so cute omg. I wonder if Weller is disappointed or relieved? Knowing what a gentleman he is, probably relieved lol. But anyway, they already know that the snake is the calling-card of a hacker guy, but they could never find him until just now, when he was picked up on facial recognition for the first time. Is it just me or does he kind of look like a less-attractive Henry Cavill? But anyhow they assume that he's going to hack into some mainframe or something so they rush to Grand Central to detain him. And awww Jane and Tasha both get their own little mini-teams to lead. Man, these guys are totally FBI elite, aren’t they? God all the other agents must think they are just so cool. I bet there's heaps of office gossip about them and people pick their favourite team member like fans do with the Avengers (which should clearly be Clint and Natasha, duhh) or Power Rangers or whatever. I bet all the Reade fans have been bummed lately. But anyhow, they've spotted their target at the station-- he just picked up a dead drop. Jane follows him, but he's clearly expecting trouble bc he notices her, then makes a run for it-- only to be grabbed by another guy. And for a sec I thought it was one of Jane's lackeys that she'd perfectly positioned-- but then that guy slits the hacker's throat and steals the package. Daaaamn. Also omg I find it hilarious that there's like instant screaming and running from the bystanders the moment it happens-- like c’mon, writers. These are New Yorkers. New Yorkers have got shit to do and places to be and they keep their eyes DOWN. They'd have to be standing right beside this guy and get their coffee spilled on themselves in the struggle to even notice at all. I do appreciate that Jane goes straight to the hacker to administer first aid rather than running after the attacker, leaving that to Zapata. Who does a damn good job of it, nearly catching the guy before he's shot by another dude who subsequently takes the package. Like damn, what is in this thing?? Zapata runs straight past the guy on the floor, not even checking to see if he's still alive, too busy giving chase to dude #3. Too bad, son. Weller, however, catches the guy first and kicks his ass very thoroughly, which we all know I am a huge supporter of. And inside the package is.... a Rubiks cube?? I wonder if it opens up when you solve it???

Lol Weller's bummed about going through all that for a Rubiks cube, grumping about it being a dumb toy-- and Patterson's all 'excuse u these are very cool adult things that totally normal and cool adults are into okay' and ughhh the little grin on Zapata's face just gives me life. Almost as much as the fact that when Patterson says the cube is related to Leakhub, Zapata immediately explains what it is to Jane, instantly knowing that she's in the dark about it and catches her up so she doesn't have to ask. Ughhhh Zapata is such an amazing and considerate friend and she just always knows what people need and I'm so glad that she and Jane are back to being buds again because they are the besssssttt. Then Patterson shows them the mannequin-challenge video that she found (idk exactly how, using her usual Patterson awesomeness I guess) that had the message from the Leakhub founders in it, hidden on the license plates. Damn. Sometimes I remember that this is a TV show and that it's written by actual real people and I think about it and I'm just like goddamn these people are clever. But anyhow. I love that the mannequin challenge actually came up at all (even though by this point in time, even in the show-universe, it would be a long-dead meme) just because the Blindspot cast and crew did a challenge of their own and this all feels very meta rn haha. I love Patterson approving of the classy iambic pentameter in the coded message too haha. And so they realise that the Leakhub founders are basically having a going out of business giveaway, handing over their cache of Super Secret Files to whoever completes their challenge. And on that list of documents is... dun dun dun... the Truman Protocol, which as we've heard is basically the basis of Phase 2. So if they find this document, they might be able to stop Shepherd. And, you know, there's also the fact that if any one of these documents gets into the wrong hands, it could have devastating consequences etc etc

Aaaand Shepherd is in some super tiny little jail thing, and will be taken to the consulate when it opens in ten hours. Yeaaaaahhhhh she'll be long gone by then. I do appreciate the guard guy verbally putting her in her place though. Too bad she'll probably kill him soon.

Lol Patterson has solved the Rubiks cube-- though not in the traditional way, as Weller points out, eyeing the randomly-coloured sides. She snarks that she could have solved it in 30 seconds (20 when she was in tournament shape appearently, and omg I adore her so much) but explains that the arrangement of the little colored squares per side IS the code, with each pair of them representing numbers or letters. Zapata seems to get it, bc that girl is honestly such a secret little nerd, but I personally would be in the 'smile and nod' camp with Jane and Weller rn lol. Basically it translates to a challenge where they have to hack one of a bunch of different documents. They realise, too, that there were other Rubiks cubes out there, and other people are also playing this game, meaning it's like a large-scale scavenger hunt. The team picks one that involves a big pharmaceutical company that is reported to have products that cause cancer, meaning they can complete the challenge in a bit of a Robin Hood way rather than causing more problems. Weller's totally ready to just ditch Patterson to get all hacky with it, but she drags him back, telling him that doing it by remote access would take her all day, and then before he even speaks she says in a super deep voice "we don't have that kind of time, Patterson" and then continues laying out her plan and oh my godddddd Patterson mocking her big bro is everything I have ever wanted in this world and more. I think I literally shrieked. Weller gives her this adorable 'excuse me??' look and ugh Jane is so completely failing at hiding her smile and omg I love this stupid team and their stupid family dynamic ughhhhhhh

Omg. Patterson's plan literally involves Jane and Weller going for a relaxing couple's stroll down the CEO guy's street, and I literally cannot even explain how delighted I am rn because Jane is literally loving it?? She's smiling like a kid, just so happy to be here with him, getting to do something relaxed and easy and just the two of them-- like literally she could reach out just a tiny bit and they'd be holding hands, walking down the street like any other lovestruck couple without a care in the world. And of course Weller notices her smile, and he makes a joke about them not getting shot at for once (dude, please at least knock on wood after saying something like that, geez), and ughhhhhh I love her little laugh and her bright smile as she looks up at him and then the way she giggles as a couple of kids race past them and omg she's literally almost giddy just to be out doing something normal with the man she loves and I am SO EMOTIONAL about it. And then sighhhh, the moment is over and the smile fades and she takes a deep breath and asks him about hearing from Nas, and how he feels about her leaving, given the whole thing with Allie having left as well, and oh godddd now I'm emotional in a much less pleasant way because she knowwwwwwwss. Jane knows/knew about him and Nas-- like she might even think that they were still together right up until Nas left-- and she puts her own feelings aside to make sure he's okay and aaaaarghhhhhhhhh this is the woooooorst. She has literally probably known since that damn baby shower in 2x08 and ugh I can't even imagine how it must have hurt her to see them both at work every day and know that they probably woke up together that morning or would be going home to each other that night and ugh noooo my baby. She just cares about him so much and suffers through it silently and ugh it hurts me. And Weller's pretty much all 'huh? Nas who?' bc lbr that was only ever just a stupid fling for him (emphasis on the stupid) and his heart has always been 100% Jane's but he probably thinks she's just asking to make sure he doesn't compromise the mission somehow by being distracted over Nas and there's almost a dry little chuckle in his voice as he tells her he's fine and ughhhh these two literally just need to have a clear conversation bc this is driving me CRAZY. Idiots. But anyhow, they've just found the guy's car (fortunate timing there) and so they stroll over, with Weller standing guard over Jane while she casually slashes though one of the car's tires like it's warm butter (bc she's a superhuman, obviously-- do you have any idea how hard it is to slash through a tire?? Hard!) but anyway tbh I don't know if anything could really capture my aesthetic better than this moment lol? And anyhow onto the next step-- the guy comes out and sees his slashed tire, only for a cab to conveniently pull up right beside him-- with Weller at the wheel haha. Ugh I love Patterson's customer service voice as she calls to tell the guy he's being hacked, almost as much as I love the little grin she and Zapata exchange as she does it. And then he tells her to piss off with her little scam, then calls the ‘real’ IT department-- only to be answered by Zapata, and omgggg if I loved Patterson's customer service voice I am DYING over Zapata's. Also what an asshole, he just hung up on Zapata mid-sentence?? So glad their little camera then watches him put in his password so they can steal all his stuff and expose him. But ughh I can't believe that Weller's voice has somehow managed to get even deeper and more gravelly than usual? I hope Jane can hear Cabbie!Weller over the comms rn bc I really want her to be able to experience this too haha. Honestly though do the writers of this ep have some kind of role-playing fantasy, or?? Because it's sure as hell feeling like it... not that I’m complaining

Aaaahhh Reade just showed up in the bullpen. Weller takes him straight to his office and I love the fact that while Reade immediately sits, Weller is standing for just a moment longer, meaning that when Reade apologises he's looking up at Weller. It's very 'penitent son' or something, idk. And Weller is so calm and steady, and ugh he could totally rip Read a new one for what he did but instead he's so supportive and forgiving and allows Reade to take the time off without the upper management ever having to hear what he did and ugh tbh I feel like season 1 Weller wouldn't have been this gentle?He would have been much more shouty. I think his experiences with trauma and betrayal recently have made him even more understanding and forgiving and despite what Reade said before, they ARE family. And Weller looks out for his own. And then ughhh Reade and Zapata... but wait he thanks her for 'sitting through that' and she tells him she's sorry... and oh no. Ohhhh noooooo. He really was abused. Oh god. I am so horrified and sad that he had to watch that and sort of re-live it. Ugh Reade my baby I know I've been grumpy at your behaviour lately but I am so sorry and I love you and I hate to see you hurting. Also their hug is so sweet ugh and wow she really is tiiiiiny lol

Awww Weller walks into the Bullpen and I love that his three ladies are all hanging out together at the same desk?? Like Patterson could be down in her lab with her lackeys and Jane and Zapata could have been off doing their own thing but instead they're all sticking together bc they're besties and ughhhhh I am so happy. Also have I mentioned how much I love this ‘Charlie's Angels’ kinda situation they've got going on rn?? Reade's away and there's no more Nas (#sosad), so it's just Weller and his angels and ugh I am so into it. Literally can we have a spin-off movie about this? Like Patterson is their computer whiz and Zapata is the demolitions/weaponry expert and Jane is their combat expert and they fight crime under the direction of their doting leader Weller and ugh just give it to me now. But anyhow the Leakhub peeps have received the files that they hacked from the asshole drug company guy (and which Patterson cleverly sent through fancy means so they'll never know it came from the FBI), and a new message comes, telling them to wear red, go to a particular place, and bring someone they trust. And uggghhhh just let me die, bc Weller doesn't even hesitate; he just immediately picks Jane to go with him. Their responses kill me-- Jane's head snaps around and she just stares at him; Zapata's all like 'of course you would' haha; whereas Patterson's all disbelieving and insists that she should be the one to go bc what if there are more puzzles??? This is literally her forte. Ooh and Zapata looks at him then like 'let's see you argue this one buddy' lol. And then Weller says he's great at puzzles and Patterson legit laughs before quickly putting on a serious face when he stares at her (yep, he may be your big bro but he's kinda still your boss, honey) and she says "Yes, in your own way" and ughhh Zapata is LOVING this and I loooove the fact that she looks to Jane (who is determinedly staring at the ground, trying so hard not to laugh) because they're best buds again and they're all sharing this joke at Weller's expense ughhhh. Oh man, I almost feel sorry for my lil boy. So outnumbered. So out of his depth. But because they love him, they let him pretend that he really is calling the shots, and Patterson relents (sidenote: what are those earring she's wearing? Like an inverted triangle underneath another upright triangle? Isn't there some culture where upside down triangle means ‘woman’ and upward pointing triangle means ‘man’? So this combination would mean... sex? Idk maybe I just made that up, but anyway enough about the sex earrings) and helps Jane pick out her red outfit. Maaannn I wish we had gotten to see the conversation she and Jane had in the locker-room (or lbr, the one she, Jane and Zapata had, all in there together giggling at Weller’s expense haha).

Oooh karma has caught up with Weller quickly-- he's right, he does look ridiculous. But I still dig it?? And it seems Jane does too haha. Ugh I loooove seeing her smile and laugh so much??? She's actually really enjoying this case and I think that has less to do with the relative lack of danger and more to do with the amount of one-on-one time with Weller ugh. Oh and now suddenly they're swept up in a sea of red, meaning Patterson and Zapata lose them. Ooops. So they end up at some big old industrial building, which Weller says used to be a sanatorium for TB patients back in the early 1900s. Well look at you, lil history buff! I am now headcanoning that Weller knows heaps of NYC history bc it was an interest he developed when he was younger (maybe young Weller couldn't face the future without Taylor so he spent all his time focused on the past ugh) and ugh now I want him to take Jane out on a walking date where he just tells her history of the places they see while they hold hands and eat icecream or something ugh. I can dream, right?? But anyhow the door is their first challenge-- a keypad with a note about the simplest answer being the right one, and a math riddle, and they just look at each other like 'man it would be great to have Patterson right now' lol. And Jane's like 'ugh maths is gross why don't we just guess' but Weller stops her and just reaches for the door handle and pulls the door open. The simplest answer was that the door was never locked in the first place. Looks like it's lucky Weller did go along, bc I feel like Patterson might have solved the equation without necessarily thinking of any other alternatives. Score one for Weller. Tbh I feel like I would have done the same as Weller, bc I would have just been like 'nope too much maths can I just yank it open by force instead' lol. Though man the riddle does give me some serious flashbacks to the IQ test I had to do in order to get into med school. The first third of the test was all stuff like that, and those logic puzzles like where you have to get all the animals across the river in a boat but it could only hold two at a time and some of the animals would eat each other if left alone etc. I actually quite liked that section but the middle third was more my jam-- we just read different paragraphs of text about people interacting with each other and had to determine why they did what they did/said certain things/how they were feeling etc. That part was awesome. The third part was literally looking at patterns and picking which weird shape should come next in the sequence and I really wasn't a fan of that one at all haha. But aaaaanyhow. I wonder what would have happened if they'd put an answer into the keypad? Like would it have just locked them out, or blown up in their faces?? But omg I love Weller's 'told you I was great at puzzles' and the way Jane just rolls her eyes at him omg these two are so marrieeeeddddddd

Wow okay so they pretty much just stepped into the human version of a bowl of skittles-- there's colourfully dressed couples everywhere, and looollll Jane makes a joke about being glad not to be on the turquoise team and ughhh my baby is such a goddamn cutie pie omg. The green team gives them shady looks, and Jane wonders if everyone here is a hacker-- but Weller says some would be mercenaries or bodyguards or spies. Great. Lol then suddenly the lights go down and epic music starts and a spotlight appears on a hooded figure and for half a second I almost expect it to be Rich (even though I know he's back in prison and has an entirely different body shape) bc this is totally his kind of style haha. But then the hooded figure reveals themselves to be... Kaylee?? Erm, I mean some lady hacker, meaning ooooh the Hacker Bros are actually sisters. Or were, since the other one was apparently killed in a boat crash. Um, okay. This is all a little weird. God she really does remind me of Rich though. I wonder if they've met? I bet they're friends. Or exes haha. And then crap she says that there's a cop in the room and pulls out a gun and dammit Jane your poker face is usually better than this, get yourself under control woman! But then she does sound super badass and in-control when the Hacker Chick asks her who she thinks the cop is, so phew. Aaaand oops, now the white team is dead. Well, a little less competition, at least?

Oh I forgot about Shepherd. She tries to connect with the guard about living with tyrants, but little does he know that SHE is the tyrant she's talking about. Ugh, I wish he had a tranq gun or something to knock her out with

Oh Readey. My baby is at the shooting range having all kinds of nasty flashbacks as he shoots, and okay either all his shots will have gone wild and missed entirely, or they'll all be right on top of one another in the silhouette-man's heart. Aaand it's the latter. Oh my poor traumatised son. You need more Zapata hugs ugh

Hacker chick is taking them all to individual rooms for the next challenge, and I love that when she holds up the hard drive of files, Jane looks back at Weller like 'are you sure we can't just attack her now and steal it? We could take on all these people' lol. But instead they head for their room (poor orange team just got dissed by the Hacker chick. That's what you get for wearing such a terrible colour lol) and omg I KNOW WHAT THIS IS. I loooove escape rooms, though I've never yet done one. One just opened in my town though so I'm gonna try to drag some friends along. Oh but before the key-finding can begin, there's a polygraph challenge-- "prove you can trust each other and you'll fin d your fates will be forever intertwined" yaaaassss I like the sound of this. It's true though, isn't it? If they reveal some of the things they've ben hiding from each other and then come through this whole ordeal knowing that they trust each other, they'll be one step closer to finally getting back on the right path, the one they’re meant to be on, the one that leads to marriage and babies and growing old together ughhhhh. And oooh Weller seems a little nerv ous about the polygraph-- if it asks him his feelings for Jane, he's screwed. He'll be even more at her mercy than he already is. Not to mention that he probably still thinks she doesn't feel the same and ughhh my boy is just not ready to be stripped of the last of his walls. Not like this. Whereas Jane is all 'let's do this' because she knows that if she needs to, she can beat the machine. Though I feel like that wouldn't be hard in this instance anyway bc it's literally missing half of the measurement devices that it should have, and somehow apparently can have answers of more than just yes or no? Mmmmkay, sure. But ugh the look they exchange when the chick is on the screen talking about them trusting each other. Both of them are like 'despite everything I trust you but I have no idea if you feel the same' and ughhhh I am so READY for this. And then lol the chick trolls Weller when he tries to talk to the recording. I love the humour in this show haha. But aaaahhh the first question is about meeting each other and their first impression, and I'm interested to know how this would work for those teams that are hacker + bodyguard/mercenary? Like 'we met this morning and he seemed like he would be really good at killing people so I thought that was good'?? Or maybe that’s the point, it's like an instant method of disqualifiying some teams, in that the questions are designed to show that they have a strong bond, a connection and trust equal to that which she had with her sister, so any pairs of strangers would automatically have to fail. After all, the rule specifically said 'bring someone you trust', meaning those teams broke that rule. Which means that Jane and Weller are automatically going to be one of the few teams that have a chance of winning. Excellent. But omggggggg the way Weller looks up at her sharply when she said she was terrified when she met him?? Ugh and he looks at the computer like 'wait no that can’t be right' and it comes up True and she looks at him all 'I did good?' and he's still processing that one because ugh of course she was scared-- she had no idea who she was or why this was happening and was locked in a room completely at the mercy of the people holding her-- but he would hate the thought of her being scared of HIM. But tbh I totally believe that the moment she first met him, her terror went from overwhelming to just a low background hum, because she just instantly recognised that he was Good and would try to help her and protect her. But wait hold on I want to hear about Weller's first impression too?? Because I feel like it would have been something like 'My first impression was that she was beautiful.... and that she was somehow both dangerous and vulnerable at the same time. From the moment I saw her I wanted to protect her.' and it would ping true and Jane would stare at him while he stared at the floor and ughhhhhhhhh why would you rob me of this opportunity show, whyyyy

Patterson's database just flagged that one of the fake documents made by Sandstorm's forger guy was just recently used-- and so they realise that Shepherd is in Bangkok. Dun dun dunnnnnn. They also still have no idea where Weller and Jane are either and are very stressed about it lol

Oooh wait Jane is answering again? Are they alternating and we just didn't get to see Weller's last question, or?? And ugh she answers that yes she's lied to him about something important. It's interesting that the question doesn't ask them to admit what the lie was, but that could either be bc the writers didn't want to have to go into it, or bc the Hacker Chick just wanted to plant that seed of distrust between the pairs and cause them to have an argument about it later. Of course this question doesn't have much of effect on Jeller bc they've already had their big reveal of all the lies and the subsequent fallout. Well, most of the lies, anyway. She's still got her Emma lie and he's still got his 'I'm stupidly in love with you but have made you think I'm not' lie. Though technically his lies-- that he's in love with her, that he hooked up with Allie and Nas to distance himself from her-- are more omissions than outright lies. But then aaaaaahhhhh Hacker Chick asks what the best/worst thing their partner has done for them (again, for strangers this would be an awkward one to answer bc they wouldn't really have anything to say) and ughhh Weller answers and talks about her getting inside his walls and ugh he's avoiding her gaze and fidgeting as he speaks, but then looks up and meets her eyes as he half-whispers that the worst thing was the same answer and ugh she can barely look at him, her eyes drawn to the screen instead, because ugh when he started speaking it seemed like her getting inside his walls was the worst thing-- which it did turn out to be as well, but there was more emphasis on it being the best thing and she must hardly be able to believe that he could ever consider being vulnerable to her like that as a good thing but the screen pings True and ugh she swallows and looks like she's trying not to cry and ughhhhh save me. And then the last question is hers, and it's about why they chose to work with their partner/why did their partner choose them, and Weller looks at her kinda like 'crap, how's this gonna go' but also simultaneously 'yes please tell me how you feel about working with me because I need to know that you'll stay' and ugh she says she chose him bc he's honest and loyal-- and then meets his eyes and says she trusts him with her life. And ugh he looks down, unable to hold her gaze, and you just know he's thinking about how he didn't protect her from the CIA and how he treated her like shit when she came back and how she still believes in him even after all of that and how he doesn’t deserve it. And he's probably also thinking that she's among the maybe three people he would trust with his life, with the other two being Patterson and Zapata (Reade's temporarily taking a break from the list) and yet the others are his hand-picked teammates who he has worked with for years and who have always proven themselves to him. Jane is an ex-terrorist who he's known less than a year and who has already lied to him and betrayed him more than once, yet he would still willingly put his life in her hands because he knows she would never let anyone hurt him. Ughhhhh. But then she says that he didn't choose her, he was forced to work with her, and he looks up and frowns a little bc the computer shows that she believes that's true but it's so totally opposite to what he feels and tbh I almost expected him to say something about it right then and there, but there's no time bc a little compartment pops open and there's locks to unlock. Also I just noticed that the symbol in the screen is a triangle with an eye in it overlying an inverted triangle, almost like Patterson's earring! What does it mean?? Are Jeller being followed around by a literal sex-symbol because I'm really starting to feel like the universe is trying to send them a message.... but anyhow the escape-rooming begins, with Jane finding two keys to Weller's one, then realising that the fourth lock is opened by the third lock itself. God she's so smart. I bet Weller is finding this super hot rn, bc I’m pretty sure the rest of us are. And then ta-da, a wall slides aside to reveal a window into the room next to them, where the blue dudes are still searching for keys. A message on the screen says that pressing the big button by the door will let them out, but fill the blue guys' room with deadly gas. Which means that getting to the files first-- saving a whole bunch of people-- will require killing two people in cold blood. Well, shit.

Well, if anyone tells you that slow internet never hurt anybody, show them this clip. This guard died bc of it, poor guy. But first he was talking with her about how Remi and Roman probably miss her and I'm like nooooope they certainly do not, my man. Ugh I'm so sad he had to die, though, like it was absolutely coming from the moment she got locked up, but ugh we were SO close to having her in US custody and then... sigh.

Ugh my precious babies are desperately searching for another way out, bc they refuse to press the button. And then ugh the blue guys unlock their last lock and see the same message-- and I appreciate that one of them tries to stop the other from pressing the button. Thanks for having honour, bro. But it's still not enough, and the other guy hits the button, releasing the gas-- into their own room, while Weller and Jane's door swings open. Plot twiiiist. Jane automatically moves for the door-- they have a mission, after all-- but Weller refuses to leave the guys to die, so he smashes the window and the two of them drag the blue guys out. Ugh, my babieessss. Unfortunately being good people means that the green team has gotten a chance to get out ahead of them, and they chase them down, catching one and absolutely kicking his ass in a freakin' awesome tag-team way, because these two are literally the most badass partners ever. And so they make it to the finish line-- but after the other guy in green, who grins at them like a cocky S.O.B. But then whaaat the white-team lady is there-- she's actually the other half of the sister duo. Niiiice. Jane's all ‘????’ and the chick makes a joke about her being a ghost and lol I love how absolutely done Jane is with all of this. Poor woman is daydreaming about being back on the sunny streets strolling along with Weller rn rather than being here trying to prove herself to these criminals lol. She tries to argue that both partners were supposed to get to the finish line, yet greenie is on his own, but Hacker chick shoots down that attempt. But then Weller, my precious cupcake, my secret cinnamon roll, argues that the whole point of the button test was to ensure someone with a moral code got the files, and reminds her that he and Jane risked the win by stopping to save two strangers. White-clad sister seems to like him-- er, I mean his argument-- and so the main hacker chick is all 'eh, sure, I love a twist' and tosses the hard drive to Weller. I bet Patterson, as amazing as she is, couldn’t have succeeded like that. The green guy tries to attack Weller but neither Jane or the hackers' bodyguards are having any of that shit lol. Nobody touches Weller :P And loooolll the chick reminds them that their fates are now forever intertwined and they look at each other kind of awkwardly and it's just like well guess you guys should just go ahead and get married now then...

Uh ohhhh, Zapata's friend from the precinct called her and says that the detective investigating Coach Jones' murder is about to start an inquiry into possible evidence-tampering in the case-- and oh no this could go very very badly. Ugh my baby I am so worried for you

Blah blah Shepherd has tracked the guy with all the toxic stuff and killed him, and now has all the goods (or should I say 'bads', heh) on a boat, headed for NYC. Whatever, lady. The team will stop you.

Aw Reade is having a session with Dr Sun. I still really, really don't like that the person now hearing all their most intimate confessions is someone brought on board by Nas. I also can't forget how she treated Roman like a monster, and incorrectly diagnosed him with a really significant disorder. I just don't think this team should be trusting any shrink that has any connection to government agencies rn. I do like how they're sitting in chairs side by side though, so he doesn't feel suffocated or trapped. And ugh he says that using is gun is triggering (heh) his flashbacks, and Dr Sun suggests he maybe separate himself from his triggers... which would mean leaving the team. As much as I love Weller and his Angels, I really do want Reade to come back eventually... I mean, Zapata would be so sad without him??

Speaking of our angelic team, they’re down in the lab, looking at the booty they just scored from the hackers. There's a loooootttt (maybe enough to drive a season three...??). Good thing it's in safe hands with these guys, who would never use it for evil. And then they find the !!Truman Protocol!! which is like the redactiest of redacted documents, but they can see that every POTUS since then (well, up to Clinton I) has signed it as well. Jane also spots a stamp with the letters COGS at the bottom, reminding them that Nas' source told her to follow the cogs. Ugh, my super smart baby girl, I'm so proud. And so somehow it all connects to Phase 2, but the question is how....

As any sensible person does in the face of such pressing matters, the team goes out for drinks. And ugh I just love Weller and his ladies having these little bonding moments away from the NYO, the four of them banding together because they are the only ones left fighting this war. Their ranks have been diminishing one by one, and they are the last ones standing, the handful of Spartans facing an entire army alone. Tbh though I really want to know which of them suggested the drinks; I'd like to think it was Weller, partly suggesting it to help morale but also partly so he might have a chance to talk privately with Jane with a little bit of liquid courage on board. And ugh he's so supportive now, reminding them all that they had a huge win today and now have a really significant new lead that will help them stop whatever Sandstorm is planning, and then ugh his savvy sister Zapata is like 'time for some Jeller alone time' and pulls Patterson away with her. Ugh, what a wingman. It's interesting bc we really don;t see thaaaaaat much direct Weller-Zapata interaction, but somehow I feel like-- of the pre-Jane team, I mean-- they are the most similar to one another and have a super good understanding of each other? He seems to act like the older sibling towards both Reade and Patterson, but with him and Zapata, they're more on a level? He still gives the orders but she subtly gives him crap about it and isn't shy to disagree with him if she thinks he's wrong. Like they'll never be tight like she and Reade are, but I definitely think they've got a really cool connection. But ANYWAY, the Wingman has departed with the Cockblock and this means-- as Weller ensures by literally looking over his shoulder, omg-- that Jeller have a rare moment of privacy. Jane's just happy chilling there with him; she has no expectations or anything, she's just so content to be sharing this kind of bonding moment with the others and to get to sit next to Weller and listen to him talk and catch the occasional hint of his cologne and just feel safe and wanted and included ugh. But Weller's been dying to have this talk since the polygraph because he needs to correct this belief she has that he's only working with her because he's forced to. He literally loves working with her, and that was part of what made her betrayal and subsequent absence so hard (and what made him so grumpy when she came back)-- because not only had he 'lost' the woman he was in love with, but he also lost the best partner-- yes, partner-- he'd ever had. She made him better, in every way, and for a while he lost that, and without it he spiraled. He was irresponsible in his personal life and barely holding it together in his professional one. So to hear, today, that she thinks he doesn't want to be working with her, doesn't want her around... he couldn't let her go on believing that. And ugh his voice is so cute when he tells her that he was never forced, and she teasingly calls him out on it a little bit, reminding him of when he'd refused to let her out in the field, etc. There's no malice to it though, her casualness showing that she understands he's moved on from that steadfast rejection of her, and his joking response of 'doesn't sound like me' is a way of acknowledging her point, but also subtly communicating that he in the here-and-now isn't the same/doesn't hold the same views as he did then. She smiles at that, then reassures him anyway, telling him that she actually meant they were 'forced' together initially by Shepherd's design and now in the mutual drive to take Shepherd down. And then he basically tells her he's completely okay with that, because though their enemy started them on this, it has enabled the to save a lot of people, to do true good.

AND THEN, he says 'and...' and takes this deep breath and shifts to face her, clearly working himself up to say more, and Jane is all "what?" because she's felt the change in the air between them; this wasn't just one of those patented Weller Reassurances where he bolsters the morale of his team. That was the lead-in to something else, something he's about to tell her, and she stares at him as he stares right back and tells her that all of it led him to her. And she smiles a little and looks away, not exactly knowing how to respond because she doesn't know where this is going, and it's kind of like when someone pays you an unexpected compliment and your body doesn't know how to react because your mind is instantly scrambling, and ugh she clearly expects him to kind of just stop there, or change the subject or something,,, and it's only when she looks back up him and he's still looking at her so intently and adds 'and you to me' that her face softens, filled with such looooongingggg and her breath escapes like a tiny little sigh and ugh there's such emotion in her eyes and then he shifts his arm and idc that it's out of shot, I am certain he is now lightly grasping her elbow, and he tells her that the two of them coming together is something he would never-- he literally emphasises the never-- want to undo. Which means that having her in his life is worth more to him than the ability to erase every bad thing that has happened since her appearance in Times Square. And ughhhhh there are tears forming in her eyes and there's a tiny shudder in her breathing because oh god this is everything she's ever wanted, to have his forgiveness and his love and have a chance for the two of them to start over, because she loves him, never stopped loving him even when she hated him, and so right now she can hardly believe this is real and ugh the way she looks down for a moment like she's drawing on the courage to believe in it and go with it, not even realising she's already subconsciously leaning toward him just a teeensy bit even before she looks up (because her body is already a step ahead of her poor overwhelmed mind and heart) and then she looks up and sees him also leaning in just a fraction, eyes still on hers, no mistaking his intent but also ready to pull away if she indicates this isn't what she wants, but ugh then her eyes meet his and she leans a little closer and it's like that tiny movement tipped them over the edge, and then he's slowly closing the gap and she tilts her head and they hold eye contact until the last moment and her eyes have just fluttered shut, scarcely half an inch of space separating their lips, literally no possible doubt remaining that both of them don’t desperately want this-- when Patterson calls out, and I love that while Jane pulls back like a startled deer (or rather, doe), Weller literally does not move. He's probably just too busy thinking 'I'm gonna kill you, Patterson' but I'd like to think it's also bc he's not afraid or embarrassed to get caught. Literally everyone else in the team already knows he's in love with Jane anyway (and actively ships it) so what's the point in trying to hide it? I love the fact that Jane glances back up at him and gives him that small smile before pulling away, and he just grins at her like 'so close...' while she scrunches her nose and mutters 'yeah'. They are very much on the same page when it comes to their exasperation with interruptions haha. And then ugh they're so cute as Patterson arrives, both straightening in their seats and Jane clearing her throat while Weller pretends his dumb grin is about the drinks and not the almost-moment he and Jane just had (because oh my god she was going to kiss him back) and then Zapata rejoins the table with a grin that says she knows very well what just got interrupted (while Patterson remains oblivious, clearly having been focusing on her footing rather than what was happening at the table as she approached), and as the conversation resumes, Jane looks back at Weller with this shy but elated little smile because oh my god he was going to kiss her. And okay maybe it didn't actually ~happen~ but it was literally so close to happening that it had the same end result anyway, which is that they each know now that THEY BOTH WANT TO DO THE KISSING WITH EACH OTHER. LONG-TERM AND EXCLUSIVELY. Someone help me I’m dying over this aaaaahhhhhh

Okay so I literally couldn't care less about Shepherd's scenes (except about the fact that they cut short the screen time of characters I actually like) but damn this overhead boat shot is actually pretty gorgeous. Nice one, team. And then she's all 'shiiit the FBI has the Truman Protocol' and we see the Green team with Parker and ooooh I wonder if they recognised Weller and Jane at the hunt?? Did they know she was the prodigal daughter and he was the golden boy? And yaaaass I love seeing Shepherd’s day get ruined. But then woah lady, no need to put a hit out on Weller because of it??? I agree with that slimy Parker, I thought he was vital to everything??? What the hell is Phase 2????

Lol the guy checking Zapata out as she walks along the street. Same, bro. And then oh crap, flashy lights and sirens and "That's her" and on one hand I love that they've got literally four cops there just to take her in-- frightened, were we, boys?-- but on the other hand I'm like nooooo don't you dare arrest my baby she's done nothing wrongggggggg (lately) ughhhhh

Aaand okay there’s one down, time for 2x20 lol

#Blindspot #Jeller #Better late than never ugh #ALMOST-KISSINGGGGGGGG AAAHHHHH #Blindspot recap

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hoodiesandcomputers · 8 years ago

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Shared My Body and My Mind With You (That’s All Over Now): Chapter 8/8

Six months ago Felicity did the unthinkable and paid to have sex with the one and only Oliver. Despite being worlds apart they’ve become close friends, but what happens as feelings change, a rival comes into the picture, and a friendship suddenly starts to break? A continuation of a prostitute/client AU, which comes from my one-shot “Taste of Your Poison Paradise.”

Hey everyone! Sorry for the delay -- this chapter ended up being a monster. So if you’re on mobile and don’t want to read this, I would absolutely recommend coming back to your dash or tag in an hour or so. You’ll be scrolling a lot, lol.

Many thanks to @curvy-tam and @the-mimi-hiddleston for supporting me when I needed it the most. They were so understanding and gave me all the time I needed to get back on track. And of course, I have to thank @awriterincowboyboots for making this chapter a thousand times better. <3

Ch 1 // Ch 2 // Ch 3 // Ch 4 // Ch 5 // Ch 6 // Ch 7 // FF // Ao3

Nine months later

Despite moving her desk away from the windows, Felicity finds herself suspiciously staring at the windows and wondering when they’ll break off. Back at Kord her office was on the 51st floor, but now she’s all the way at the 60th and no amount of anxiety pills can make her overcome her fear of heights. She doesn’t doubt she could switch offices with someone else, but all the offices have windows on this floor, so it wouldn’t really make a difference.

Sighing, Felicity decides the best way to stop looking over to the side is to put a large plant that’ll obstruct her view of the ground below. Still, she shouldn’t complain too much when she’s got a nice view of Star City and the plaque outside her door which reads “Felicity Smoak, CTO.”

Now that is what success looks like.

It’s been nine months since Felicity left Chicago, and she’s starting to become accustomed to her new home. Star City is different from Chicago – it’s smaller and cleaner, and it feels more relaxed.

And not just the city. She was always stressed at Kord, wondering if she had done the wrong thing or overstepped her boundaries and she’d never had any time to breathe. Even though she’s CTO, Felicity actually has two full days off for the weekend instead of spending her Saturdays in the office. The workload is different and she oversees everything technology related in Palmer Tech, but it’s good. She’s busy and happy – her bank account is definitely happy, too.

Although she enjoys her time in Star City, making friends while being CTO is harder than she anticipated. Felicity essentially has to start from scratch, which is easier said than done. Even though she’s lived here for nine months, Felicity hasn’t ventured much inside Star City, let alone walked around her entire neighborhood. There are times when she feels lonely, and it’s during those moments a small part of her wonders whether it was worth coming to Palmer Tech.

Despite having gone on a couple quasi-dates with Ray back in Chicago, Felicity eventually chose not to be in a relationship with Ray. It would look completely unprofessional if she had decided to be with Ray, and thankfully he understood how important her job was. Regardless, it didn’t hurt to occasionally flirt here and there, and he was a good business partner. For once, she feels appreciated and revered.

In the end, Felicity knows she would never have had this opportunity if she hadn’t left Kord. As CTO, she’s begun to work with engineers to create ways to help those with spinal injuries and several other projects that’ll change the world. Felicity’s actually eager to come to work, and coupled with Ray’s enthusiasm, the company is always buzzing with excitement.

She’s in a good place.

There’s a loud knock on her door, and before Felicity can tell the person to come in, Curtis Holt barges into the room looking nothing short of frazzled. Alarmed, Felicity stands up while her secretary comes running in, confused by Curtis’ antics.

Nodding at her secretary – Kendra – that everything’s all right, she focuses her attention on Curtis and asks, “What do you think you’re doing here?”

Ignoring her, Curtis – one of Palmer Tech’s most revered engineers – continues to pace back and forth her office. His hair is wild and it looks like he hasn’t slept, which is definitely a bad sign. “Are you OK?”

“No, no way, not. At. All.” Stopping right in front of her, he looks at her with I-haven’t-slept-in-five-days eyes and whispers, “It’s done.”

Felicity’s heart begins to pound as she can only imagine what went wrong. “What’s done?” she asks carefully. A thousand scenarios run through her head, all of which end badly. So many things could be “done” buy Curtis’ definition that she can’t think.

“The chip. It’s totally done for like my late grandmother – bless her but not really because she was a little mean – and I don’t even know what we’re going to do because even I’m having a hard time trying to find a solution for this, and basically I need you A. S. A. P.”

Frack.

The spinal chip meant to save the world has had a lot of hiccups from the very beginning, ranging from lab disasters to not being able to get the funding they needed from investors. But seeing Curtis so uninhibited means something really went wrong, and there’s zero time to waste.

Grabbing her phone – and promptly dropping it before she picks it up again – Felicity kicks off her heels, getting ready for battle. “We’re going. Now.”

“Aye, Captain!” Curtis bolts out of there with Felicity in tow, as she tries not to slip on the marble floors due to her tights. She and Curtis run past Kendra and she looks at them with bewilderment, shocked to see her boss running in the halls of Palmer Tech.

“Miss Smoak! You have a meet–”

“Not now Kendra!” Felicity yells as she dodges her coworkers. She can only imagine how she looks with a tight fitted skirt while running down the hall at full speed. Curtis, being unnaturally tall, is almost at the elevators and she hates him for having a biological advantage over her. “Cancel everything today! And tomorrow!”

Thankfully Curtis is already inside the elevator holding the door for her and she runs inside, desperate to go down to the R&D floor. Realizing she forgot to say something else to Kendra, she sticks her head out the elevator and hollers, “And for the foreseeable future!”

She only manages to just bring her head back inside before the elevator doors close on her face, and it isn’t until Felicity hears how loud they’re breathing that she realizes the absurdity of the situation. Laughing, Felicity bends a little and places her hands on her knees, trying to regain her breath.

Curtis’ looks up at the ceiling to control his heavy breathing and says, “It’s the first time I’ve ran in six months.”

She laughs again and Curtis joins her, as she has no doubt they’re both wondering how they still have a job.

There’s never a dull moment at Palmer Tech and she wouldn’t have it any other way.

~/~

“If it makes you feel better, Hartley got a little too cocky with Ted Kord at the gala last week and got his butt kicked. For once he’s not walking around with a stick up his ass,” Caitlin muses.

Laughing at Hartley’s demise, Felicity continues to walk towards her house (a real, actual house that’s almost one hundred years old and large enough to fit a family of five), dodging runners and people casually walking about. The weather has gotten a little chilly and for the past week it was raining, but today the sun is out and warming everyone’s hearts.

Gripping the phone tighter, Felicity slows her stride and stands to the side, leaning against a brick wall as she continues her conversation with Caitlin. “I don’t think you have any idea how happy I am! You know what they say: karma’s a bitch.”

Chuckling alongside her Caitlin adds, “And the best part? He hasn’t come into my office since last week!”

“Finding out Hartley got his ass handed to him is probably the best thing I’ve heard in forever.”

“I knew this would be a better present than me coming to visit you.”

Stepping away from the wall, Felicity starts to walk when she spots a sign with a menu listed on it. Glancing to the side, she sees a small deli shop and wonders if she should waste time and buy something to eat. Looking back at the menu, Felicity scans it until she spots a four-cheese soufflé as their special.

Oh, I should send a picture to Oliver –

There’s a slight twinge of nostalgia and sadness in her chest, reminding her she can no longer do it anymore. Felicity can’t call him up and talk to him about the latest movie she saw, or joke about random things she’s seen on the Internet. She can’t sprawl all over his couch and complain about work and laugh at his escort stories. There’s no one to hang out with on Wednesdays and Sundays anymore.

There’s no Oliver in her life.

Almost every day Felicity catches herself thinking about him, usually when she sees something which reminds her of Oliver. She wonders if he’s OK and if he’s still working at Emerald, but moments later Felicity remembers she’s in no position to think about him anymore. She has to deal with the consequences of her decision.

No amount of success and money can make up for the fact that Felicity chose to run away from her problems instead of fixing them. But Felicity wasn’t prepared to find out Oliver Jones was, in fact, Oliver Queen. And in her panicked and angry state, she felt Oliver was using her to sustain a picture-perfect friendship, which was anything but perfect, and she pushed him away without talking to him like a mature adult.

It felt like a literal kick to the gut when she found out the truth, but there was also a sense of relief. She finally knew why he was so secretive, why he hated Ray, and (in Felicity’s eyes) seemed to be jealous of her accomplishments while he was stuck as an escort. Felicity’s no stranger to secrets, but when Oliver’s began to impact their friendship, she knew something was up. And sometimes Felicity hated being right.

After Oliver revealed everything to her, she quickly began to put the pieces together but she couldn’t help but wonder: had he ever planned on telling her? Evidence proved otherwise. Everything about Oliver’s behavior made sense, yet deep down Felicity knows she never really knew him. And it hurt her. She spent more time with him than anyone else, opened up to him for the first time since Cooper, and all she got was a box of lies.

So, in her anger Felicity left without patching things up between them, hoping a new environment would permanently erase any memory she had of Oliver.

Clearly her plan failed.

Yet, despite feeling lonely and wondering if she made the worst mistake ever, Felicity knows her feelings were justified. Had they not talked (or yelled) about their differences, they probably would’ve continued to be at odds with one another. In the end, their friendship would have dissolved like any other, to where their weekly hangouts would’ve turned into monthly, and eventually nothing at all. Their argument was a necessary evil, Felicity concludes, but one that still haunts her to this day.

“Hello, Felicity? Are you there?”

She hadn’t realized she spaced out, and honestly forgotten she was on the phone with Caitlin. Her heart still beating at an abnormal pace, Felicity reluctantly tears her eyes away from the menu as a pang of disappointment hits her.

“Yeah, sorry. I . . . never mind.”

Oblivious to Felicity’s inner turmoil Caitlin continues to chat, but Felicity can’t bring herself to pretend everything is OK. Regardless, she pushes through and swallows her feelings, marching forward into the unknown just as she’s always done. Even if it hurts to do so.

~/~

It’s Thursday now, and for the first time this week Felicity’s spent her entire day at her office. After the fiasco regarding the spinal chip, Felicity’s stayed at the R&D department to make sure everything was running smoothly. They found a whole slew of other problems, so Felicity’s been running on coffee and adrenaline for the past few days.

Needing another cup of Joe, Felicity heads to the kitchen and is surprised to find a couple of the secretaries there. Muttering a “Hello” Felicity goes straight to the coffee machine, only to find it completely empty.

I hate my life.

“Sorry Miss Smoak, I usually refill it but I thought everyone left,” she hears Victoria, Ray’s executive assistant, say.

Turning around, Felicity smiles tiredly at Victoria and another secretary, Carly, to let them know everything is fine. “I guess it’s a sign I should stop drinking coffee and go home, but I’m clearly an addict and don’t know how to stop.”

The girls laugh politely at Felicity’s lame small talk and return back to gossiping before her presence interrupted them. She busies herself by setting up the coffee machine when she suddenly hears an Oliver mentioned in the conversation. Her heart pounding, Felicity wonders if it’s Oliver Queen or someone else – yet deep down, she has a feeling it might be her Oliver.

Straining her ears to hear more, Felicity angles herself so that she’s a little closer and can listen to what they’re saying.

“I can’t believe you saw him! What did he look like? I used to have a major crush on him,” Carly says.

Victoria laughs and Felicity can imagine her shaking her head in disbelief. “He’s so hot now. He’s got a scruff, he’s super built, and ugh I’m drooling at the thought of him.”

So it is Oliver’s they’re talking about, and Felicity’s powerless to stop her legs from shaking. What’s he doing back in Star City and for how long has he been here? When Felicity last saw him, she was convinced he planned on being stuck as an escort for the foreseeable future. This information is sending her in a tailspin.

Confused by the turn of events, she tries to calm herself and listen once more to what Victoria has to say.

“Anyway, he was hanging out with Tommy Merlyn the whole night. I think he’s moved back permanently. I wonder what he was doing for all those years,” Victoria muses.

Felicity’s met Tommy at a Merlyn Global event, as it was obvious Malcolm Merlyn was trying to set the two of them up. Obviously nothing happened, but she can see why Oliver would be his friend. During her brief research session, she saw several tabloid articles detailing Oliver and Tommy’s panache for debauchery.

Deciding she’s had enough, Felicity doesn’t wait for the coffee to be done and heads straight to her office. Her mind reeling, Felicity shuts the door to her office and lies down on her couch, trying to even her breathing but to no avail. She doesn’t know what to think, other than Oliver Queen is back in town to disrupt her life.

Or maybe make it better.

In a twist of fate, this feels like a second chance to Felicity. She’s been feeling so guilty as of late, and misses Oliver more than she misses her father, more than she ever missed Cooper. There’s an emptiness in her heart, and she knows it’s due to not ending things with Oliver on a good note. What she needs is closure – their fight was a mess and Felicity didn’t get a chance to articulate what was on her mind. If they meet, maybe they can hash things out like adults . . . and possibly reconnect on better terms.

She wants to reconcile with Oliver more than anything. These past few months have given her plenty of time to dissect every second of their argument, and she’s come to conclusion they should at least talk. Yes, Felicity was deeply hurt, but she can see why he kept the information away from her. He was scared of opening up and Felicity shouldn’t blame him. She can only imagine how difficult his life has been, from starting off as a wealthy playboy to suddenly becoming a nobody having to whore himself in order to pay the bills. His pride wounded, Felicity understands why Oliver disliked Ray, even if the only thing Ray did was take over QC. Oliver’s future was stripped away from him without a moment’s notice and he’s barely hanging on.

Perhaps now that he’s back and they’ve aired their dirty laundry, they can move on from the past.

But she’s getting ahead of herself – Felicity needs to reach out to Oliver first. She owes him that. Sitting up on the couch, Felicity reaches for her cellphone and immediately searches for his number, even though her hand is shaking from doing so.

She can’t believe it – it’s happening. She’s actually doing this. For nine months Felicity’s taken out her phone various times so she could apologize, yet every time she couldn’t bring herself to do it. Coupled with her guilt and cowardice, Felicity held off on being the bigger person, but it’s time for a change.

She doesn’t know what she’ll say to him, and for a moment she stops herself from dialing his number. Sighing heavily, Felicity knows if she waits a second longer she won’t call him. For someone who prides herself in being strong, Felicity is undoubtedly weak when it comes to emotions.

Swallowing thickly and gathering whatever courage she has, Felicity dials his number and anxiously waits to see what happens next. Her vision blurs from being overwhelmed by an onslaught of emotions, and she prays Oliver won’t be able to hear her heart obnoxiously beat through the phone.

It rings once until she hears a beep, followed by “I’m sorry, the number you have dialed is unavailable.” Shutting the phone, Felicity sighs in relief and leans back on the couch to calm her nerves. She doesn’t want to be relieved Oliver’s ditched his old phone number, and therefore can’t talk to him, but she feels she dodged a bullet. Calling him now isn’t the right time.

One way or another, Felicity knows has to make amends with Oliver. She shouldn’t take this as an opportunity to not seek out Oliver at all, but perhaps she should focus on what she’ll say once she meets him . . . Whenever that happens.

~/~

It’s been a couple of weeks since Felicity found out about Oliver being in town. Once she realized he was back, Felicity promptly spent the next few days combing through the Internet, and found various articles on gossip sites discussing his new look and speculating on what he did for the eight years he was gone. Felicity wonders if people will find out about Oliver’s time as an escort and the thought worries her. It’s possible Oliver may no longer be ashamed for working as an escort, which is why he’s back in Star City. Yet, despite several valiant efforts from rabid fangirls and smarmy reporters, no one has a clue what he did during those eight missing years.

Despite her constant researching, she still hasn’t made an effort to contact Oliver. There’s a part of her afraid he’ll turn her away after what she did to him. She can’t call herself a strong, mature adult when she’s scared shitless to approach Oliver. If she doesn’t speak to him it would make her a hypocrite, and that’s the last thing Felicity wants to be known as.

She just – all she needs is practice. If Felicity doesn’t practice in front of a mirror and spend a few hours writing down what she wants to say to Oliver, she’ll definitely be a blubbering mess and she can’t afford for it to happen. Felicity likes to prepare for every situation and this is no different.

Which is why she’s completely shocked and petrified when she sees Oliver outside a building in the Glades on a cold Saturday afternoon, painting on the side of the wall with a serene smile on his face.

Her heart does a strange pitter-patter and her breathing gets shallower by the second, while her mind races with confusion. She’s bundled up in winter gear since it’s November, but she’s suddenly sweating buckets and doesn’t know if she should strip and wave hello, or get the hell out of here.

See, this is why Felicity needs practice and a blueprint for her life, because when things like Oliver randomly appearing in her line of sight happens, she loses her brain and the ability to function.

He’s looking at her like she’s the sun, never mind the fact they had a huge fight and haven’t spoken in nine months. And for a moment, Felicity feels so good just seeing him that she thinks no time has passed.

For a split second, Felicity imagines herself running into his arms and pretending everything’s all right between them. But reality is much different and instead she takes slow, robotic steps toward him, unsure of how close she can get to him.

Oliver drops his paintbrush and cautiously steps forward as if he’s trying not to scare her. And maybe that’s a good thing – as familiar as Oliver feels, there’s a distance between them caused by their unfortunate rift. It aches to see how far apart they are now, how the air is laced with trepidation, but maybe this can change.

At least she hopes so.

They finally stop moving towards one another, careful not to overstep their boundaries. Her curiosity getting the better of her, Felicity takes a good look at Oliver and notices a certain bit of lightness to him. His shoulders aren’t tight and ridged, his lips aren’t pursed in thoughtfulness and his eyes . . . they’re wide open, like it’s the first time he’s seeing the world.

Without a doubt, Felicity knows these past nine months have changed Oliver, and she’s unbelievably proud of him.

She can’t stop herself letting out a relieved smile, because all she’s ever wanted for him is to be the man he can be. Felicity can only imagine the emotional toll it took on Oliver to be an escort for so many years, and she’s glad to see him happy for once.

“Hey, Oliver.” Saying his name out loud feels foreign to her mind but familiar to her tongue. Her brain can try to push Oliver’s memory away from her, but every inch of her body and soul will always remember.

“Felicity.”

He’s bundled up as well, but there’s some paint littered on his jeans and his nose is red from the cold. Shuffling his feet, Oliver shyly glances down before looking at Felicity. “It’s good to see you.”

It’s good to see him, too. “Yeah” is all she can muster, as her mouth – for once – is unable to embarrass her any further.

There’s an awkward pause, and in order to distract herself she looks at everywhere but him. For the first time Felicity notices where she’s at – the building Oliver was painting on appears to be a small business, maybe a coffee shop. It doesn’t look like it has opened yet, she spots equipment, tables and chairs scattered about inside. Her heart leaps as her mind wonders whether Oliver came back to start a business, one that doesn’t require illegal activities.

Over to the side she spots someone watching them, and as she takes a good look she realizes it’s Tommy Merlyn. It feels a little weird to be speaking with Oliver when she’s also met Tommy, and especially since he seems to be spying on them. Felicity sees no one else inside the building or around it, which makes her feel a little better, but she’s still nervous.

Realizing it’s been silent for a good ten seconds, Felicity takes a deep breath and rocks on her heels, unsure of what she wants to say.

“I . . . called but your phone isn’t . . . working anymore. It’s been disconnected. Obviously.” She feels herself blushing, which is stupid and annoying. She needs to be stronger than this.

“Uh yeah, sorry about that.” Oliver exhales loudly and adds, “After I moved back I changed numbers. I was getting . . . calls. Ones I didn’t need anymore.”

Her eyes snap up to his and Felicity immediately understands what he’s getting at. It seems Oliver’s officially stopped being an escort, and really did intend to come here as a fresh restart. And she’s happy for him.

She sees him in a new light now. Felicity was convinced Oliver didn’t care about moving forward, or was so focused on being stuck in his misery, but she was so damn wrong about him. Life pushes unwanted circumstances onto so many people, and some get dealt with a horrible hand – Oliver was one of them. To see him in the process of (possibly) opening a business means he’s taken control of his destiny, and for that, Felicity is unbelievably proud of him.

“Oh, gotcha.” Nervous once again, Felicity counts backwards from three to control her word vomit, since she’s positive she’ll say something totally embarrassing, but she has a feeling she’s only delaying the inevitable.

Oliver shuffles his feet once more and shoves his hands inside his coat pockets. Felicity steals a quick glance at him, and she’s once more annoyed-yet-slightly-happy Oliver is as handsome as he is. But it’s how his eyes are devoid of any haunted memories, which gives her a pause for thought.

Oliver’s become the man he was meant to be, and she’s so glad to have gotten a chance to witness it.

“Hey, uh, I’m opening a café – this café, actually – next Saturday.” He’s nervous too – maybe their breakup affected him more than she thought, because Oliver is anything but nervous. “I’d . . . really like it if you could come by.”

Her heart skips a beat, and an overwhelming feeling of hope etches into her skin. Although Felicity doesn’t want to expect something from Oliver’s invitation, as it could very well be him acting nice for the sake of being nice, she wants nothing more than to support Oliver in this endeavor. And if he’s inviting her because he wants to become friends with her, then she should definitely take this opportunity to mend old wounds.

“I might have some company event to go to . . . but I’ll try to make it.”

Lies.

Why is she being so difficult? She spots the exact moment Oliver’s face falls, and she wants to kick herself in the face, even if it is impossible to do so. This is what she’s wanted for so long – a chance to make up and get closure, and now she’s throwing it away. Felicity doesn’t understand why she’s pretending to not care as much as she does, but it pisses her off to the point she can’t think clearly.

She’s about to rescind her comment until Oliver nods. “That’s fine.”

Shrugging then taking a deep breath, he smiles gently and Felicity’s in awe of how unbothered he is. “It was . . . really nice seeing you, Felicity. I hope you can come.”

For some reason her throat closes up, and she can only nod before tears threaten to spill over. Oliver smiles softly once more before turning around to finish painting the wall. She watches him walk toward his friend, his steps carefree and light, and for a moment Felicity wishes she met Oliver when he was like this. But she knows if she didn’t, then she wouldn’t appreciate the struggle he’s gone through, and for that she is forever grateful.

Turning around, Felicity composes herself as she takes long, deep breaths. Today was unexpected and she needs time to think about what happened with a big bottle of wine.

As she starts to walk away from Oliver, she hears Tommy loudly ask, “Dude, how do you know Felicity Smoak?”

Well, wouldn’t he like to know.

~/~

The obnoxious wall clock Felicity bought on a whim ticks incessantly, its sound getting louder and louder as the hour hand inches toward six o’clock. She’s spent the last four hours following Twitter mentions of Oliver’s café opening, searching for something but she doesn’t know what. According to visitors, Tommy Merlyn and Thea Queen – Oliver’s sister – are working there and hundreds of people have come. A line started to form an hour before the café – Nocking Point – opened, and since then it’s been nonstop traffic.

She debated going there, but chickened out no less than seven times. Felicity doesn’t know why she’s having a hard time going, especially since this is what she’s wanted for a long time, and Oliver personally invited her. There’s a part of her deathly afraid of the possibility of not getting together as friends or . . . something more.

After finding out Oliver’s no longer a prostitute, her mind wouldn’t stop thinking about what ifs. What if she and Oliver get together? What if they turn into something more than friends? What if their relationship is really good? What if it’s not? It’s the first time she’s allowed herself to think of these questions and they’re making her dizzy.

During the course of their friendship, Felicity found someone who made her happy and excited and less lonely. It was different – she had been intimate with him before she knew him. Oliver saw a part of her very few people did and that will forever tie her to him. And amidst all the weirdness, they became fast friends over the mundane aspects of their lives.

But Felicity held herself back. She didn’t let herself get too attached to Oliver in fear of totally falling in love with him, or forcing him away with her neediness. There were times when she teetered back and forth, unsure if what she felt for him was her projecting a romantic relationship on a friendship because she was lonely, or whether underneath their easy smiles there was something hidden there. In the end she pushed it away, believing their delicate, easy friendship and her career were more important. Felicity didn’t want to disrupt that balance.

Now . . . she doesn’t know what to think. Oliver’s working legally – he has his own business. Felicity didn’t think something she mentioned in passing would actually happen but it did, and he seems happier, less anxious. And, coupled with knowing who Oliver really is, maybe it’s not as unfathomable to be with him.

Letting out a strangled breath, Felicity admits she wants to be with him. She wants to be his girlfriend. She . . . loves him.

The last thought gives her pause, but it’s so honest it aches to admit it. Oliver withholding his secrets from her hurt her more than usual because she cared – cares – about him. A lot. If Oliver were any other friend she wouldn’t have exploded on him as she did, but Oliver was more than a regular friend and it destroyed her when he lied. She thought there was a closeness and understanding, and when Oliver said otherwise, it crushed her soul and any self-esteem she had.

Their breakup has affected Felicity more than she thought, and after seeing Oliver so carefree she wants nothing more than to be a part of it. Nothing’s holding them back – they’re free from societal expectations, shame, embarrassment and stubbornness. For so long Felicity’s been denying the truth, but she has to face it head on.

And tonight is the perfect night.

Without wasting another second, Felicity gathers her coat and purse, her confidence increasing as she realizes she’s this close to meeting Oliver again. Taking her car, Felicity speeds her way to his café and hopes he hasn’t left yet. The shop closed at 5:30 – it’s possible Oliver’s already gone home. This causes Felicity to drive faster, not caring about breaking any traffic rules.

As she speeds along Star City’s streets, she can’t help but snort at how very rom-com this is. Felicity half expects Nora Ephron to jump out of nowhere and direct her reunion with Oliver, and there’s a part of her slightly giddy at the thought of seeing him and telling Oliver her feelings about him. She’s no doubt scared – her mind is an Internet browser with a thousand tabs open, but Felicity plans on going there and being honest.

If things don’t work out between them, or they’re able to forgive one another but it’s still too hard to move on, then she’ll be OK with it. At the end of the day, she hopes they’ll get the closure they need and can look back at their friendship with fondness instead of bittersweet nostalgia.

Lost in her thoughts, Felicity almost misses the café before she screeches to a halt. Luckily she’s able to find parking nearby, but once she kills the engine Felicity’s courage vanishes into thin air. Her mouth pools with saliva, her palms moisten in fear, and she feels her confidence waning.

Glancing at her phone, she sees that it’s already 6:30 and another dose of panic hits her. Oliver could very well be gone, and she’ll have missed her chance to tell Oliver how she feels about him. Inhaling deeply, Felicity checks whatever makeup she has remaining on her face, but she stops for a moment to look at herself. For the first time in awhile, Felicity seems . . . excited. It’s like she’s been on a month long vacation and the summertime glow hasn’t faded away yet.

Felicity does her best to shake her nervousness away and exits the car, because it’s now or never. As she inches closer to the café, she sees the lights are off and her heart drops in disappointment. If Oliver’s not here this will all have been in a waste, and she has to wonder when she’ll get another perfect moment like this. Hugging her coat closer, Felicity stops in front of the café and tugs on the door, finding it locked. Undeterred, she goes over to the window and presses her face against it, hoping someone – preferably Oliver – is inside.

And he is.

He’s sitting on one of the chairs, looking over some papers as his head is bowed in concentration. His collared shirt doesn’t even try to cover his impressive physique, and Felicity finds it endearing there’s a tiny apron wrapped around him.

She spends another few seconds watching him from afar, but her private peep show is over the moment Oliver’s head snaps up and his eyes land on her. Feeling like she got busted for doing something wrong, Felicity blushes furiously and awkwardly waves at him – she can only imagine how weird this looks. He doesn’t move for a moment, no doubt shocked she’s here, but Oliver quickly springs to actions and practically runs to the door.

Felicity can hear him fussing with the lock, and when he manages to unlock it the door swings wide open as Oliver holds it. He’s smiling and Felicity’s heart leaps – he looks so happy and good here. An overwhelming desire to hug him grabs a hold of her, but Felicity manages to restrain herself. Now’s not the time to freak him out.

“Felicity.”

He says it with such wonder, curiosity and something else that she can’t think. There are times when Felicity’s convinced Oliver says her name like it’s a sentence; as if there are too many words to accurately describe what he’s feeling, so he pours it all into saying her name with whatever emotions grab him.

She missed him. So much.

“Mind if I come in?”

“Depends. Do you plan on buying anything?”

Felicity’s suddenly reminded of their Sundays at Jitters, and she can’t stop herself from grinning like an idiot. “If it’s any good.”

Oliver laughs and it’s absolute heaven to her ears. “I guess you’ll see for yourself.”

Beckoning her to come inside, Felicity steps forward and enters the café, keenly aware of how close Oliver is. He shuts the door behind her and clasps his hands as she surveys the space. “Anything in particular you’d like?”

She’s quiet for a moment as she digests everything in. The café is stunning. It’s modern yet classic, with hints of green tastefully peeking out. There’s a corner dedicated to large, comfy sofas, the chairs and tables are sleek, and coupled with a brick wall Felicity has no doubt this will become the latest hipster spot in Star City. It’s clearly a labor of love and Felicity wants this to succeed as much as Oliver does. He deserves it.

“Oliver, this is amazing,” her voice laced with equal amounts of awe and excitement. She can’t wait to see what’s in store for him.

Turning around, she fondly looks at him but he’s bashfully staring at the ground. A small grin creeps up to her lips and Felicity says, “I’m really proud of you.”

He takes a deep breath and shakes his head as he shoves his hands in his pockets. “Thanks.”

The air is suddenly rife with tension and unspoken admissions, and Felicity finds herself awkwardly standing there. “Can I sit?”

Oliver nods and waves his hand around the café’s general direction. “Take your pick.”

Sitting down at the table nearest to her, Felicity takes off her coat and continues to admire the café. Her eyes touch upon the paintings and vintage posters on the walls – she spots a poster for The Adventures of Robin Hood, and briefly wonders if Oliver put it up there on purpose, especially since it’s her go-to background movie to play during the weekends.

Maybe she shouldn’t read too much into things.

“You still didn’t tell me what you want.”

Snapping out of her daze, Felicity shrugs because she knows anything Oliver gives her will be delicious. “Surprise me.”

Nodding once more, Oliver smirks knowingly and heads to the kitchen, while Felicity tries to rehearse what she’ll say to him. Unfortunately the gorgeous location keeps distracting her.

She had expected the café to look and feel great, but she didn’t expect how amazing it turned out to be. It feels comfortable and familiar; all this place needs is a bed and Felicity could easily call it home. There’s a lingering smell of cookies and other food, and for a moment Felicity feels she could sleep here without another thought.

A couple of minutes later Oliver reemerges from the kitchen with two plates. As he gets closer, she grins at how serendipitous this is – of all the things Oliver chose to bring out, it’s a soufflé, and a chocolate one at that. He smiles at her and places the soufflés on the table, settling down next to her. Its aromatic smell makes her dizzy with exhilaration, and she sees that it’s been drizzled with chocolate on top of it.

“I feel like I’m on an episode of Top Chef.”

Oliver laughs tiredly and Felicity immediately feels guilty for coming so late. After all the craziness of today, she doesn’t doubt he’s exhausted and wants to sleep.

She’s tired, too. Tired from being sad, of wishing she could change the past, of her mistakes, and of being scared. Felicity tries so hard to be something else other than honest. She’ll run away as far as she can, push her feelings to the back of her mind believing they’ll only ruin her future, and in the end it leaves her broken.

Despite having a decadent soufflé in front of her, she doesn’t feel like eating it anymore as her thoughts continue to cloud her mind. But once she takes one savory bite, Felicity can’t help but moan as its flavors make her mouth dance in ecstasy. It’s soft, warm and gooey on the inside, and it’s quite possibly the best soufflé she’s ever tried.

“Do you like it?” Oliver grins, no doubt amused by her reaction.

“Are you kidding?” she says with a mouthful of food in her mouth. Swallowing, she immediately digs her spoon inside for another bite. “I could eat this for breakfast, lunch and dinner.”

Smiling once more, Oliver stays silent as Felicity continues to eat. He doesn’t touch his own soufflé, and feeling a bit self-conscious, Felicity slows down and tries not to shove the entire thing in two seconds. It’s painfully quiet now, and in order to not embarrass herself she takes one more bite.

“I’m glad you came.” His confession startles Felicity – glancing up at him, she’s surprised to see how sincere he is. “I was . . . worried you wouldn’t.”

Crap – she feels bad for getting his hopes up and crushing it. But now that Oliver’s being honest, Felicity knows she can’t continue to skirt around the truth anymore. If he can open up to her then so can she. Still, it causes a rush of adrenaline and nervousness, and Felicity does her best not to freak herself – and Oliver – out.

“Yeah I . . . I – I didn’t have anywhere to go.” She spots Oliver’s eyebrows rise slightly, and for a moment she feels she’s about to get reprimanded by her mother.

“I wore PJs the whole day and stalked you on Twitter.” Realizing how horrible it sounds, Felicity tries to remedy her faux pas even though she knows it’s pointless. “I mean your Twitter mentions. Mentions on Twitter about you.”

Frack. She really can’t go a minute without embarrassing herself, can she? Her skin burns in humiliation, and closing her eyes, Felicity collects herself before saying what she really meant. Oliver’s got a hint of a smile forming on his lips, and his reaction makes her marginally feel better.

Taking a deep breath, Felicity pushes the soufflé aside and puts her thoughts in order. “I’m sorry. I guess I . . . just didn’t want to show you how much I . . . “ Missed you. So much.

It’s at the tip of her tongue, and God, she wants to tell him how much she missed him. But it doesn’t feel like the right moment, and she swallows her confession away, unsure of when she’ll get the chance to say it. There are several other things she needs to tell him first.

Sensing her hesitation, Oliver purses his lips and slightly turns his chair towards Felicity. She can tell he’s trying to find the right words to say, and she patiently waits for him, just as he’s done a million other times. The silence doesn’t feel unbearable but there’s a layer of unsaid words begging to be let out.

“Felicity, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you I was back in Star City.”

As his jaw tenses he glances at the floor, and Felicity wants nothing more than to make him feel better. She doesn’t know why he feels the need to apologize for not contacting her, since they fought and she made sure he wasn’t allowed to be in her life anymore. Sometimes Felicity wonders what causes Oliver to shoulder everyone’s burden, because he does it often.

She shrugs. “It’s OK.”

Oliver’s not having it. Shaking his head, he shifts in his seat as he gathers his thoughts. “I just – I needed to figure myself out.”

“Oh.”

She wonders what it means – figuring yourself out. Perhaps it means moving to another environment and pushing yourself until you can’t, until you’re so exhausted from running that you finally have to stop. Or maybe it means going back home and finding ways to come to terms with your past, present, and future.

Felicity doesn’t know if she’s figured herself out yet. She’s still stubborn, is prone to hacking when she knows she could go to jail for it, worries she’ll get abandoned by anyone and everyone at a moment’s notice, and can’t for the life of her want to workout. But she’s also figured out how to balance her work life, and how to stay calm in stressful situations. She knows her limits. She dresses better, she finds happiness in smaller things, and knows what it’s like to lose missed opportunities.

She’s lost, loved, and won. And that’s all part of figuring yourself out. Seeing Oliver take a chance and reevaluate who he is as a person encourages her to do the same. And maybe, just maybe, they can work this out.

For the first time since she woke up this morning, Felicity finally takes a moment to soak this all in and let fate take its course. She’s just . . . happy she’s here, sitting next to Oliver for the first time in months. It feels like things are starting to happen the way they’re supposed to – naturally and without expectations.

Glancing up at Oliver, she gives a shy smile before looking down at the table and toying with the napkin. She doesn’t know what to say, but she figures she should start small.

“How did you leave Chicago by the way? You know, with Emerald and all . . .”

Clearly, Felicity needs a lesson on how to start a conversation without going straight to the heavy stuff, but she is curious and wants to know.

Oliver takes a deep breath and stares off as his eyes harden. “Let’s just say Isabel won’t be a madam for the foreseeable future.”

Well, that was unexpected. “You know you can’t not finish the story,” she says with a laugh. “I’m dying to know the rest.”

He raises his eyebrows and fiddles with the spoon on his plate, his mouth pursing as he tries to find a way to tell Felicity the truth. She doesn’t know much about his time at Emerald – he would hardly talk about it unless there was something funny, and she finds herself wanting to know everything he kept hidden. Felicity wants him to know she’s there for him, and listening to every sordid detail is one place to start.

“I’m sure you remember me occasionally complaining about her. “ Felicity nods – there were only a handful of times Oliver slipped how it wasn’t so great to work at Emerald. “She wasn’t a good person. So I made sure she didn’t hurt anyone else.”

Felicity can only imagine what pushed Oliver to do something like that, but she trusts his judgment and knows if it weren’t Oliver, it would’ve been someone else who would send Isabel to jail.

“Good.”

Her steely response causes Oliver to look at her peculiarly, but as someone who’s seen the worst of humanity more times than she can count, Felicity’s glad Isabel won’t be able to prey on escorts anymore. They’re more alike than she realized.

Wanting to change the heavy subject, Felicity clears her throat and smiles awkwardly. “Anyway, how long have you been back?”

He seems thankful for the change of direction and quickly says, “Four months.”

A pang of disappointment hits her – he’s been here for this long and she didn’t know? In the back of her mind Felicity knows he didn’t contact her because he needed time for himself, but she wishes so much hadn’t passed.

“Oh. OK.”

Oliver notices the mood shift and explains, “I – I was going to . . . I got busy with opening this business and personal things.”

“Like I said, it’s fine.” She doesn’t want Oliver to feel bad when it’s not his fault to begin with. “It’s not like we were on speaking terms or anything.”

Giving her an odd look, he begins to rub his fingers and stares at the table. “Still.”

It annoys her Oliver feels it’s his fault for not contacting her – he shouldn’t blame himself for wanting some distance and taking time to focus on his wellbeing. Felicity’s tempted to press him, but things are a bit delicate right now and she wants things to go smoothly.

Clearing her throat once more, Felicity relaxes in her chair and looks around at the café, marveling once more at the décor. She feels the need to change the subject again and asks, “How did you manage to open a business in four months?”

He grins and stops rubbing his fingers. “It helps having friends in high places.”

Snorting, Felicity shakes her head but there’s a smile on her lips. “That doesn’t sound ominous whatsoever.”

A soft chuckle emanates from Oliver’s lips, and she’s suddenly reminded of how beautiful it sounds. She’s missed his smiles, laughs, and his presence by her side.

“How do you like Palmer Tech?”

“It’s great.” Tucking a stray piece of hair behind her ear, she takes a deep breath and tries to find a way to tell Oliver how amazing it is. “I’m having fun, actually. We’re developing a spinal chip that’ll hopefully end any sort of paralysis, so . . . I’m doing big stuff.”

Cringing on the inside, she wonders how she managed to boil down her very important CTO role into “big stuff.” She might as well have finished the sentence with bigly and ended the night there.

“Wow, Felicity. That’s incredible.” Oliver’s eyes shine the same way they used to and for a moment she can’t breathe.

“Yeah, it is.”

Some days it doesn’t hit her she’s made it – she still thinks she’s back at MIT in her horrendous goth clothing, aching to make a difference in the world. There are days – months, even – when Felicity feels she hasn’t done her part yet. While she exceeds in one aspect of her life, she totally fails in the other. Yet through it all she’s trying and it’s all she could ask for.

It’s why she’s here in the middle of Oliver’s café, hoping she can make her past a little more bearable and her future a little more exciting.

“Oliver, I really do need to apologize. For how I ended things.”

Her breath stutters in her chest and her throat dries up in nervousness and anticipation. She’s waited months to tell him what she really feels, and she wants nothing more than to have everything go smoothly.

“You don’t.” Oliver looks a little scared, as if he doesn’t want to discuss how painful their breakup was.

“But I want to.”

“Felicity –”

Shaking her head, Felicity brings up a hand to signal him to stop. This is her time to tell him how she feels. Instead of yelling at him and asking what his last name is, she has to say what was – is – bothering her and how sorry she is.

Seemingly afraid of what she has to say, Oliver looks a little cautious but patiently waits.

Taking a deep breath, Felicity gathers her courage tries to stop her voice from wavering due to an overwhelming amount of emotions. She can feel her arms shaking from an overabundance of adrenaline, and curls her hands into small fists to control it. The moment she’s been waiting for is here – she can’t fuck this up.

“It – it really hurt me, when you lied. I thought we were so close. You were the first person in . . . a long time I was this close to, and I thought I was wrong.”

The air is rife with tension, and she has to shrug off her jacket so she’s not sweating buckets from nervousness. Oliver’s carefully watching her, but she has to focus on her thoughts and take this one step at a time.

“I know I wasn’t totally open with you. I – I thought as long as our . . . secrets weren’t brought up then there wasn’t a reason to mention it.”

Her heart loudly pounds deep beneath her chest to the point where it actually hurts her. Although Felicity told Oliver about her mother and growing up poor, she never told him about Cooper or her dad. Worse, she didn’t feel like they were in a stage to discuss their fears and insecurities, and Felicity chose not to take the first step in solidifying their friendship. She wonders what would’ve happened had she opened up to him first – she’s pretty sure they wouldn’t have gotten to this point.

“I just . . . I was OK with us not spilling our deepest secrets, as long as it didn’t impact us. But once yours did impact us, and when I found out everything, I felt . . . betrayed.”

Briefly, Felicity glances up to look at Oliver and she’s not prepared to see his face completely devoid of emotion. It kind of scares her how distant he is, but Felicity soldiers on and hopes her apology doesn’t push Oliver further away.

“But I could only imagine how hard it was for you, you know? Leading a double life and all. And how you probably wanted to keep your secrets to yourself because it hurt to think about them.”

She knows exactly how he felt, since it still hurts to think about her father and Cooper even after all these years. But unlike Oliver, Felicity managed to pull herself up and succeed despite everything, while he was literally and figuratively stuck being a prostitute. Their circumstances were different and she should’ve understood.

“I’m sorry for forcing it out of you. I’m sorry for leaving like I did.”

Black dots dance around her vision and Felicity suddenly remembers she needs to breathe – she immediately gulps as much air as she can, and tries to steady her racing heart. It feels like her chest might explode and her vision blurs from unshed tears. She’s equal parts relieved and anxious, and prays he doesn’t run for the nearest exit. But he hasn’t yet, and she thinks maybe he’s been waiting for a moment to tell her what he feels, too.

His mouth open and closes for several seconds until she can hear him take a deep breath. Shifting in his seat, Oliver leans forward and she’s hit with a whiff of his scent – a mix of cookies, chocolate, and something a bit woodsy. It’s uniquely him and Felicity wants nothing more than to be in his arms.

“Felicity, I’m glad you forced it out of me.” Her eyes snap up to his, surprised by his confession. “I probably wouldn’t have said anything until you did. I took advantage of the situation.”

She appreciates his honesty, and gives him a small smile to let Oliver know she doesn’t begrudge him for it.

“Still. I left like a kid who didn’t have their way.”

He laughs at her word choice then gazes off into the distance, which causes the atmosphere to shift back into something a little more serious. Felicity’s not done apologizing, and she vows to say everything that’s been on her mind for months.

“I hurt you by not introducing you to my friends, to the other side of my life.”

Shame begins to coat her skin, lighting every inch of it on fire, reminding her what she did to keep Oliver away was so damn wrong. Putting Oliver in a tiny box labeled “Only For Felicity’s Consumption” did nothing but push him further away, and she hates how much it hurt him. He had every right to be introduced to her work and other personal life. Felicity separated their friendship from other aspects of her life, because she didn’t want people’s judgments to ruin things between them and her career. It wasn’t fair to him.

“I kept you away because I valued my career over our friendship. And I’m really sorry.”

Tears prick her eyes and she rapidly blinks them away – she doesn’t want the waterworks to spill just yet when she’s not done with this conversation. Swallowing thickly, Felicity has to look away for a moment, because she doesn’t know if she can handle staring at Oliver right now. She wants nothing more than to be in his life, especially now when things are looking up for both of them, but she hopes her confessions won’t push him too far away.

Suddenly, Oliver shifts and scoots his chair closer to Felicity – she thinks he’s about to take her hand in his, but nothing happens. Instead, he stares straight into her soul, his cerulean eyes quickly moving back in forth as they search for something. Felicity thinks he’s looking for acceptance and she wishes he didn’t feel the need to ask in the first place.

“I’m sorry I hurt you, Felicity.” His voice wavers and Felicity wonders whether this has been as hard for him as it’s been for her, too.

“I should’ve told you . . . why Ray was bothering me.”

For a brief moment, Oliver’s eyes harden and she suspects it’s due to mentioning Ray. His reaction would’ve annoyed her before, but now that she knows the truth she understands why he has ill feelings toward him. At least Oliver’s come to learn how to separate his personal feelings from Felicity’s professional life, and for that she’s forever grateful.

“I shouldn’t have let my – my issues ruin an awesome opportunity for you. I attacked you when instead I should’ve been honest about why I was acting out.”

She can tell how sincere he is from the way his shoulders have dropped and how he never stops looking at her – even his fingers aren’t rubbing together, a nervous tick she’s seen time and time again. Seeing how different Oliver is now astounds her, and his journey to this point only encourages Felicity to make changes in her life as well.

“And I’m sorry for not telling you how I felt . . .” He hesitates then adds, “About all that. I really am.”

For months Felicity’s been aching to hear Oliver’s apology. She’s imagined a million different scenarios, all of them abruptly ending because she couldn’t ever dream of this moment happening. But instead of feeling a weight get lifted off her shoulders, she simply digests Oliver’s words without another thought. It’ll probably hit her when she’s back in her bed, going over this conversation on repeat, but for now Felicity’s satisfied they’re in a place to be this honest with one another.

It’s all she could ever ask for.

“I should’ve been honest about how you were hurting me, instead of letting my anger . . . boil over.”

“And I should’ve told you the truth.”

They smile shyly at one another, and in that moment Felicity just knows they’ve moved on. Whatever was bothering before will no longer have to power to control them, because the desire to be in each other’s lives is more important than focusing on the past.

“Now you can. If you want.”

I want to be there for you.

There’s a pregnant pause and Felicity’s afraid she may have pushed it too far. Oliver leans back against the chair and his eyes darken – whether it’s from sadness or anger, she doesn’t know. But Felicity wants him to know he can be honest with her and not worry about judgments, and most of all, not feel like he has to hide things from her.

He takes a deep breath and shakes his head, like he’s trying to rid his head of certain memories. Looking off into the distance, Oliver starts to rub his fingers and Felicity knows things are going to get serious.

“The night before our movie hangout, I was called to join a house orgy.”

She sees Oliver swallow thickly and she can imagine how difficult this may be for him. Felicity almost wants to take back her offer, but they’re already being so open with each other – it would be a shame to revert back to who they were a mere ten minutes ago.

“And instead I saw . . . a young escort getting assaulted. She was barely eighteen, Felicity.”

Shaking his head once more, Oliver lets out a breath and looks down at the floor. His shoulders sag and in this moment he looks so defeated. She wants to tell him to stop or even hug him, because this is obviously hurting him. But suddenly, he sits right back up and looks at Felicity, his face betraying no hint of emotion. She doesn’t know what to think of this mood change, but chooses to wait and see what happens.

“When I went to Isabel, she . . . You have to understand, the girl was going to be indebted to Isabel forever. She would’ve never been able to get out from Isabel’s grasp.”

Felicity quickly digests the information in, and she’s hit with such sadness and pity she doesn’t know what to think. It appears Emerald was a mafia, with Isabel in charge of destroying people’s lives and stuffing her bank account. For Isabel to use young girls and keep them as modern day slaves is nothing short of disgusting. Now Felicity understands why Isabel’s in jail.

“So I had to do something to keep her safe.”

He’s seen so much – from having his money, parents and house snatched away from him to becoming an illegal escort under a literal mob boss. After all these months, Felicity understands why Oliver wouldn’t speak about his time at Emerald: it was too painful. And she feels so fucking guilty for asking him to open the can of worms. She should’ve known what his silence meant, why he only shared funny escort stories, why he did whatever he could to get Felicity talking so he could focus on something other than his horrid job.

“I’m sorry that happened to the escort . . . and to you.”

Oliver probably doesn’t want Felicity’s pity but she can’t help feeling that way. She wishes he didn’t have to go through all of it, yet she’s glad he had the courage to take down Isabel in a way he saw fit.

Unaware of Felicity’s inner turmoil he simply shrugs. “And another escort I was mentoring overdosed the following night,” his voice grave as he recounts the incident.

Holy shit. No wonder he looked so haunted on their last movie night, and worse for wear the following Saturday, on the day of their fateful fight. She remembers how off he seemed. She took his sullen silences as him being jealous of her, Ray and a million other stupid things, but he was quietly suffering the whole time. And she freaking spent that time fighting with him.

God, how bitchy could Felicity be? She made it all about her when it was anything but that. Granted, Oliver not telling her the truth made things a bit more complicated – it certainly would’ve stopped Felicity from accusing him of numerous things – but she just wishes she knew before blowing up on him.

She’s feeling nothing short of guilty. This whole debacle could’ve been avoided had they been honest with each other, but everything seems preventable in hindsight. Maybe Felicity had to lose Oliver in order to really appreciate him.

“I could’ve . . . You know I’m there for you, right?”

Her voice drops an octave and she finds herself whispering – there’s a part of her wanting him to know how serious she is, but most of all, this promise is only meant for him. There’s no one else she’s willing to stand through thick and thin for. Oliver has to know this.

Oliver’s mouth twitches as he leans forward, clasping his hands in his lap and watching her intently. The way Oliver’s looking at her reminds her of their Sundays at Jitters and Wednesdays curled up in each other’s couches, and it’s so familiar that Felicity almost cries at the thought of it. Her heart stops and restarts, her stomach doing flip-flops without her permission and she feels complete.

“Yeah.”

They fall into an easy silence, and Felicity doesn’t know how long they simply stare at one another. It should make her feel awkward but it doesn’t – it’s like coming home. She can feel her cheeks heating up, though she doesn’t know why, and immediately looks away to cover it up.

The spell now broken, Oliver ostentatiously clears his throat before saying, “I – you were right, about me wanting to keep our friendship a fantasy.”

Of all the things Oliver could’ve said, this was a bit unexpected. She doesn’t know how to respond to it, and firmly keeps her mouth shut before she embarrasses herself.

Oliver glances down at his hands and shakes his head as he does so. “I didn’t want to tell you about work because work didn’t exist between us.”

He struggles for a moment – his brows furrow and Felicity suddenly has an itch to smooth it over and take his worries away from him.

“I wasn’t happy at Emerald . . . I wasn’t happy in general.” Shrugging, Oliver smiles sadly and continues, “And I didn’t want my job being the topic of our discussions whenever we were together.”

Her chest pinches painfully and it takes every bit of strength not to launch at him. There’s a chance Oliver was severely depressed back in Chicago and she only made things worse for him by pushing him to open up. Yet, hearing how their friendship made him happier warms her body and soul, and she just knows they’re meant to be in each other’s lives.

“Sometimes I wondered why you hung out with me, you know? I was a nobody.” Felicity snorts but when Oliver’s silent she realizes how much it hurt him to be a prostitute. Naturally, his profession forced him to be isolated and prevented him from having a well-rounded social life, but despite all of it, he was – is – somebody to her.

“I was an uneducated former playboy turned escort.” Blowing a breath, Oliver briefly begins to rub his fingers, and Felicity can only imagine what’s going on in his head.

“I – I felt abandoned when I heard you were hanging out with Ray, or with your other friends.” Scoffing, he inhales deeply and rubs the back of his neck. “Which is . . . stupid, since you’re allowed to have a life.”

Combined with refusing to introduce Oliver to her friends and keeping their friendship in a small bubble, Felicity hadn’t realized how her social life clashed with Oliver’s nonexistent one. From what she can gather he spent most of his time with her, so it’s understandable why Oliver would feel that way. In an ironic twist, it’s Oliver who felt abandoned even though Felicity constantly worried it might happen to her.

“If it makes you feel better, I only met Ray twice after I saw him at the gala.”

Oliver blinks rapidly. “Oh.”

She feels the need to tell him she enjoyed hanging out with him, and that whenever she spent time with her friends they didn’t hold a candle to spending time with Oliver. “I never meant to blow you off when I hung out with my friends.”

“I know that now.” He nods solemnly and his eyebrows furrow once more in contemplation.

Hearing how Oliver felt about Felicity’s social life reminds her of last Saturday, when she saw Oliver for the first time in months. Seeing him blissfully painting away and starting a business without her knowledge made her jealous. She wanted – wants – to be a part of his life, and now she knows why Oliver felt abandoned in Chicago.

“You know, when we ran into each other last week, I saw how happy you were without me, and I guess I . . . finally realized you didn’t need me. I got . . .” Toying with the hem of her shirt, Felicity searches for another word besides jealous except she can’t. She doesn’t want to say the word in fear of making things awkward.

Oliver Hmms and when she looks up at him he’s staring thoughtfully out into the distance. It used to bother her so much when he would look away, because it usually signaled the end of a conversation. But times are different now, and she can’t be more proud of them for being able to open up like this.

“It’s funny – I thought the same thing back in Chicago,” he casually admits. This night has been filled with confessions and apologies, but Felicity’s glad they’re at a point where they can hash things out as adults.

“It made me – what’s the word – not sad, but frustrated to see you having a life.” Felicity quizzically looks at him, but he only grins lopsided at her, her heart skipping a beat as he does so.

“I wasn’t jealous, but I knew you went to work, had fun and were excited about it. Me?” Oliver shrugs and if Felicity paid closer attention she could’ve sworn he rolled his eyes. “I could barely keep my head straight. I wanted what you had – stability and a . . . passion.”

She almost tells him she was never really passionate about being a consultant, but another second passes and she finally understands what he’s trying to say: she cared about the work she did and he . . . didn’t. And although Oliver probably cared about his clients, he went home everyday wishing for something more fulfilling.

“A reason to live.”

Felicity’s sad Oliver didn’t feel like there was a reason to live in Chicago, but seeing him here, alive and happy makes her slightly glad they fought. If they hadn’t, then Felicity doesn’t doubt she wouldn’t have come here, and Oliver would’ve been under Isabel’s firm grasp, working at a job he didn’t love.

“Well, you’re free now.”

He smiles contentedly. “Yeah, I am.”

They fall into another silence but a hint of panic hits her. She feels like the conversation is winding down but she still hasn’t told him everything. She hasn’t told him she loves him. That she’s in love with him. That without him in her life, she’s barely floating by and can’t function.

Her mouth pools with saliva and she can’t bring herself to look at him. This moment is too important to screw up, but she’s never been in this situation before. She’s never felt so uninhibited that it causes her to throw caution in the wind. She feels so out of control she’ll do whatever it takes to grab a hold of it.

Gathering any bit of courage she has, Felicity breathes in deeply and finally looks up at Oliver, albeit shyly and without any bit of finesse. “Oliver, I missed you.”

For a moment nothing exists between them – time has been erased, their past is forgotten history, and the gods from above collectively hold their breath. Felicity’s vision blurs from fear of rejection, but the possibility this might turn into something good stops her from running out the door. She has to know what this is between them, otherwise it’ll kill her.

Something changes in Oliver – his shoulders drop, his head tilts to the side, and he’s staring right at her like she’s the only person in the entire world. It’s as if he’s allowing himself to see her for the first time, not as a friend but as someone more. Someone who can make him happy, someone to encourage him to live another day.

“Me too, Felicity.”

Relief washes over her, coating her skin with tenderness and chills. After finding out Oliver was back at Star City, Felicity felt she was not longer in a position to be missed, because he clearly didn’t need her anymore. Yet hearing him admit to missing her causes her to feel more loved than she has in her entire life, and she wants nothing more than to wake up to the feeling every day.

Oliver suddenly scoots forward, and for a second Felicity thinks he’s going to grab her hand, but he doesn’t. He continues to look straight at her, as if he wants her to know how important his next words are.

She takes this opportunity to really look at him – his hair has gotten a tad longer, the wrinkles on the corners of have gotten deeper and his lips, which were always in a tight, pursed lines have loosened up. He’s always been handsome, but in this moment he’s nothing short of beautiful, especially in the dim café lighting.

God, Felicity wants him so bad, and the ache in her chest intensifies as each second passes.

“Those seven months we spent together were the first glimmer of light in a long time, Felicity.” She hadn’t realized he began speaking, and she has to lean forward to hear him talk.

He’s entirely focused on her but he seems a tiny bit distant, yet it does nothing to dissuade her from losing herself in him. He’s gotten her wrapped around his finger, and the thought of it doesn’t shame her – it makes her giddy with anticipation.

“And I want to say thank you for making me . . . happy.”

Oh no. Not this – anything but this. She came here tonight for the sole reason of apologizing and telling him how she feels, not have Oliver give up on any romantic – or platonic – possibility of getting together.

But something stirs in Felicity: hope. It gets her heart racing and her palms sweaty – she doesn’t doubt that Oliver can hear her heartbeat as it covers the air with it’s fast and thrumming pace. She entertains the idea maybe, just maybe, she’s not alone in her feelings. If he’s willing to write off a potential relationship, it means he was at least thinking about it before, and it’s all the evidence she needs.

And for the first time since Felicity’s met Oliver, she fucking fights to keep them together. To have them as a single unit, bound by admiration and love. Felicity’s not going to go home and tuck her tail between her legs – she’s already done that. No, this time Felicity’s going to make sure they’re in a place where there’s nowhere to run except into each other’s arms.

“Oliver, I –”

It happens without her own accord, but before she knows it she reaches over to grab his hand. Her fingers curl around his calloused palm, igniting a path of electricity she didn’t know was possible and gasping at the sensation. Oliver flinches from the contact, and Felicity would like to imagine Oliver felt the same spark of electricity as she did. But without a moment’s hesitation, he wraps his hands around hers, holding it tight and doing everything in his power to not let go. And it fills her up with such warmth she wants to cry, because there has never been a moment in her life where she’s felt this way.

He’s taught her what it means to love, to laugh, lose and gain it all back. Oliver’s everything to her.

“I want . . . the next day, month, and year to be happy.” Her voice wavers and her vision blurs for the umpteenth time, but she soldiers on. This is it.

“And I want you to be a part of it. With you.”

She shakily lets out a breath she didn’t know she was holding, and she’s hyper aware of everything around her – Oliver’s fingers tightening it’s hold around hers, his scent, the long forgotten soufflé, and the fact all time has seized to exist. What Felicity feels is so powerful that it threatens to unbalance her, but she welcomes it with open arms.

“I love you, Oliver.”

She can feel the exact moment her soul leaves her body, anxiously waiting above her to merge with Oliver’s. All this time she’s been missing a piece, and it’s Oliver who’s been able to patch her up in ways she didn’t think were possible. He’s made her feel things she never thought she could, and no matter what happens Felicity will never regret hiring him more than a year ago. He’s meant to be in her life in its weird and awkward glory.

Oliver inhales sharply but his body doesn’t move an inch. His eyes rapidly move back and forth, searching and searching, until he’s found the answer he’s been waiting for.

“I love you, too. God, I’ve loved you for as long as I can remember.”

Letting out a relieved sob, Felicity clamps a hand over her mouth as she tries to suppress her emotions from tumbling forward. But she can’t help it – she’s been waiting for this moment for so long, and for it to actually happen . . . she can’t believe it.

And neither can Oliver – he laughs, the kind filled with delirium and happiness, the kind that shows up in true, honest moments. The sound is so beautiful and her laugh mingles with his, creating a symphony of love unknown to mankind.

She doesn’t how moves first, but their hands leave each other’s and Oliver immediately cups her face with both of his hands. He’s so close – she can see every single eyelash, pore, and truth hidden beneath his skin.

Placing her own hand on top of his and the other curling over his thigh, Felicity leans forward the same moment Oliver does, her eyes closing in contentment. Their lips touch like two missing pieces of a puzzle, and the sheer intensity of the kiss causes her to gasp – her womb tightens, her toes curl, and her skin erupts in chills as the sensation overtakes her. It’s the single most amazing kiss she’s ever experienced, and she’s already imagining what it’ll taste like years into the future.

Love does a number of things to you – it makes you irrational, angry and jealous, but there’s that other part, the part which makes you complete. The part that feels like coming home, the part that hurts so much you can’t bear to be without it.

And Felicity knows, without a doubt, all the hardships she and Oliver have gone through were meant to lead them to this point. There’s no other explanation for it – if it weren’t for Oliver working as an escort, Felicity would’ve never met him, would’ve never felt such intense pleasure, sadness and happiness.

She never would’ve known what being in love means, but she does now. As their foreheads touch one another’s, their souls mingling for the first time, Felicity has a feeling things are only going to get better. And she’ll do whatever it takes to hold onto it.

Holy shit, last chapter! Epilogue will be posted on Thursday. :)

#olicity #olicity fic #olicity fanfiction #olicitysquee #oliver queen #felicity smoak

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