#labrynthine

[girldraki]

absolutely the last post is generally sensible but we’re seeing some people in the notes who don’t seem to realize that gothic literature protagonists are real and i personally am one of them. and honestly it’s a little cruel to ask me to deprive myself of self-expression through the words of my peers

[littlefoxgw2]

sparkling, shining water ✨

[iamsecretlyabagel]

procrastinated my nursing homework because I didn't realize exactly How Much of it I had and now I'm staring down the barrel of like 12 hours of work in one sitting

[theyouth--waste-it]

Oh i see. I want to ask another question but now I'm scared that you'll answer ...

The Locked Tomb Series Official Reading Order:

- The Iliad

- The Bible

- The Apocryphal Book of Judith

- Dante's Inferno or Paradise Lost (optional)

- Don Quixote

- Homestuck

- Gideon the Ninth

- The Mysterious Study of Doctor Sex

- Lolita (optional)

- Harrow the Ninth

- Harrow the Ninth Again

- As Yet Unsent

- Nona the Ninth

[skullinahat]

oh noooo...

OH NOOO......

[thisisnotawebsitedotcom-com]

Computer Code: ANALOG HORROR / CREEPYPASTA / HORROR / URBAN LEGEND / URBAN LEGENDS

The text for the Urban Legend #42814 and a picture will be shown. It seems to be a parody of the Backrooms.

The text says:

THE “ALWAYS GARDEN”

URBAN LEGEND #42814

Now THATS-a-spicy PURGATORY! Usually found in strip malls and acid flashbacks, The Always Garden looks like a medium-budget Italian restaurant, but if you walk inside to grab a handful of parmesan you’ll discover you’re now forever lost in the labrynthine digestive tract of an ancient unknowable god. Come for the damp caesar salad, stay because escape is literally impossible. As the commercial says “The Always Garden: When you’re here, YOU’RE HERE.”

[dilsdoes]

they cll my pussy labrynthine. on a count of the minotaur.

[amelie-isnt-french]

I'll bite.

I need to know about the red string conspiracy doc.

Sounds very fun

I have been WAITING for this. Get ready for the combined brainrot of @alice-apparently and I, you poor soul. Now, listen up, 'cause we’ve got a labrynthine twisted task of a tale to tell, and if you don’t keep up, you might get lost :)

And obviously: spoilers for tmagp. don't keep reading if you're behind 🫵🏼

First things first: anyone currently descending into paranoia? we're already there, poster children of paranoia-land, that's us. May I present the title of the wonderful conspiracy doc -

There's also a TMA conspiracy doc Ali made, fully colour- episode- and entity-coordinated. It's like 24k words and not even fully done. don't worry about it.

Which is why we're going to be super normal and low-key about the Protocol red string doc right?

of course.

As you can see above, our collaboration relies on Ali's colour coding and her making nice, structured observations of possibly important things, while I provide the Latin and cheer her on. Balance is important in a marriage.

Also included in this all-round package: character info, quotes, etc.

I've since moved on from my "Gwen is evil" theory because I simply love socially awkward, abrasive characters who are good at their job a little too much (nervously shuffles Jonathan Sims, the Archivist, further behind my back). Still the hottest bitch at the OIAR, don't @ me.

Also also, in this house we love Alice Dyer and don't trust her any further than we can throw her. what is UP with all your comments Alice? What do you know???

Anyway.

But Ames, you say, didn't you promise quotes? I did, and I'll do you one better: tmagp quotes with additional obnoxious commentary from yours truly and Ali

If you'd like to see Ali lose her shit over the red canary implications (which I fully support), hop over to her tumblr @alice-apparently and give it a read. It's delightful.

Right. Moving on from the random screenshots. Basic outline of part one of the paranoia board is a section for every episode. Ali is listening to ep7 as I write this and having a great time (not), so there's not much in the ep7 section, except for this:

Thoughts and prayers, love, thoughts and prayers.

And FINALLY, my favourite section.

This is the speculation part, time line puzzle and colour coding reference, but my current favourite is this:

She's trying to reverse-engineer the case coding in tmagp, a noble cause. Godspeed, Ali, bc that is too many numbers for my silly little brain. I only excel at criticising stupid horror protagonists aka Personal Screening:

That's all for now.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk, and to send you all off, one last silly comment from me to you and the universe:

Bye!

[werecreature-addicted]

Most animal vaginas are built along the standard 'muscular tube' form. Dicks seem to have more variety, unfortunately. There's a few interesting ones, like labrynthine duck pussy, giant hyena clits, cats having no clitoral hood (just a sensitive ring inside the entrance), and wolves having knots inside their pussies.

Of course, one could use the imagination. Star Trek has not clarified what a Caitian's coital hooks are, merely that female Caitians have them and that they can be used to snag partners. Some boring people have suggested they just mean claws, but I'm personally envisioning some kind of penis-trapping organ.

I think there are monsters who could have very interesting vaginas like robots and aliens maybe even plant monsters but none of the examples I just listed aren't animalistic.

[seven--eyes]

dont talk to me right now im thinking about the solitary sylvari in the labrynthine cliffs.

[verychaoticlife]

code: horror

URBAN LEGEND #42814

Now THATS-a-spicy PURGATORY! Usually found in strip malls and acid flashbacks, The Always Garden looks like a medium-budget Italian restaurant, but if you walk inside to grab a handful of parmesan you’ll discover you’re now forever lost in the labrynthine digestive tract of an ancient unknowable god. Come for the damp caesar salad, stay because escape is literally impossible. As the commercial says “The Always Garden: When you’re here, YOU’RE HERE.”

[collector-noceda-clawthorne]

THE “ALWAYS GARDEN”

URBAN LEGEND #42814

Now THATS-a-spicy PURGATORY! Usually found in strip malls and acid flashbacks, The Always Garden looks like a medium-budget Italian restaurant, but if you walk inside to grab a handful of parmesan you’ll discover you’re now forever lost in the labrynthine digestive tract of an ancient unknowable god. Come for the damp caesar salad, stay because escape is literally impossible. As the commercial says “The Always Garden: When you’re here, YOU’RE HERE.”

[amygdalae]

When I was sick last week I had a fever dream drifting in and out of consciousness where I was wandering around a weird labrynthine parking garage and for some reason I knew if I made the correct turns it'd make me less nauseous but I kept getting lost and going the wrong way and each wrong turn was making my irl nausea worse somehow

[themoonweaversden]

Messeges that were found so far: HORROR / CREEPYPASTA / ANALOG HORROR (spoilers)

This is just to collect all the codes that you can type in in thisisnotawebsitedotcom.com and their effects only (please click images for better quality)

Masterpost with all messeges / codes

Transcript:

"THE “ALWAYS GARDEN”

URBAN LEGEND #42814

Now THATS-a-spicy PURGATORY! Usually found in strip malls and acid flashbacks, The Always Garden looks like a medium-budget Italian restaurant, but if you walk inside to grab a handful of parmesan you’ll discover you’re now forever lost in the labrynthine digestive tract of an ancient unknowable god. Come for the damp caesar salad, stay because escape is literally impossible. As the commercial says “The Always Garden: When you’re here, YOU’RE HERE.”"

[52stations]

the one place i really want to do urbex though is this abandoned childrens soft play area i went to as a kiddo in like 2004. it was in a warehouse on an industrial estate and very very dark and labrynthine…. i also really really want to go back to my preteenage laser tag spot which as far as im aware is still open i just always felt there was something violent about it…. it was in a clearing in the woods in a very 90s american style squat building and the area around it looks like a legit gun range

[grfn-btbtas]

innermost bulb of the onion is interesting to me for some reason, really reminds me of like, jack and the giant beanstalk and james and the giant peach... think generally children's (and child-like) stories have fixations "what if mundane things were large and labrynthine" as a way of structuring thought and permitting analysis