#kunidazai fanfiction

[knockyasocksoff2022]

IDEALS [kunikidazai]

(A/N: I've been palying around with ship names for these two and came up with Ideal Human because together these two make one perfectly functioning person. Kind of like how Tachizaki is Midwinter Snow because if their abilities)

SUMMARY:

Dazai Osamu is the farthest possible thing from the ideal woman Kunikida Doppo has written so much about in his notebook.

And yet . . . Kunikida is hoplessly in love with him anyway. Kunikida doesn't belive he has a chance with his coworker, I mean, have you seen the way he flirts with women? Straight as the rulers Kunikida used to use in his maths class.

Dazai meanwhile is also inlove with uptight but still charming coworker. But how can Dazai ever come close to the woman Kunikida has in mind?

Will these two damn idiots figure their shit out or not? God, I hope they do, for all our sanity!

(Summary sponsered by Edogawa Ranpo)

Categories: angst, fluff, getting together

Warnings: N/A

Thank you to @wildroseroguefor inspiring me to write Kunikidazai for the first time. Rose has lots of Kunikida content on her blog, check it out.

[gay-snufkin]

is somebody gonna match my freak (read the over 40k words kunidazai friends with benefits to lovers fic that took me way too long to write, then had to be divided into chapters even though it doesn't really have a plot except for kunikida and dazai being a mess but still i'm glad i finally finished it and it's nice to have a happy ending in these trying times)

[yucbimhbbbbbbbb]

I HATE FAN FICTIONS THAT PIT KUNIZAZI AND SAURKAURKAUR AGAINST EACHOTHER. THEY ARE TWO PERFECT SHIPS. LIKW DONT GIVE ME ‘UgggHhhhhh why izzzz dwazawii dwating dwat bwondewe!?!?! 🥺🥺🥺HE SHOULD DATE ME (ed, she ran) GRRR😜😜’ LIKE NOT BOTH ARE GOOD SHIPS DONT PUT THEM IN THE SAME FANCICIN AND MEAKE TWO PERDECT MEN FIGHT OVER THE LOSER THST IS DAZAI. NO. IF THAT HAPPEND THEY WOULD JUST KISS EACHOTHER INSTEAD, GET RED OF STINKZAI. SOUKOUKU AND KUNARDAZONK ARE TO GOOD SHIPS THAT SHOULDNT BE IN COMPITINTG

[4channerguy]

let loose / kunidazai

hayyyy so im just gonna repost this from my ao3 because ive been lacking in tumblr posts lol!! i hope you enjoy :3 xoxo (。・∀・)ノ i used this prompt when writing this: person B tossing snowballs at person A's window, not knowing the window is open and has no screen. also this is probably ooc but idgaf! and also kind of cringe but i also dgaf!

wc: 1057

warnings ✎ : boyfaliures (´･ω･`)  ➜ ┊ pairings: dazai x kunikida

𓂃 ☆ ⋮ doppo kunikida thinks of himself as a precise and sharp man.

he gets a full seven hours of sleep with no distractions, eating a full breakfast precisely at 6 AM, and then meditating. today was his free day off, and all he could think about was doing work. he’d offered fukuzawa to do more paperwork, to discard the load that was on the old man’s shoulders, but he at first declined saying, “you shouldn’t do too much. this day is possibly your only day off.” kunikida only shook his head, pulling his notebook and pointing at it. “i must follow my ideals, sir,” he said firmly. “i must retain the quota of doing seventy-two pages of work.” fukuzawa stared at him for a moment before sighing slightly. He opened his drawer to obtain a tuna can from his secret-stray-cat-stash (SSCS), because it was his free day too. The man didn’t even bother to protest against the golden-blond, and only wished him luck in his assignments.

now at his apartment, kunikida was prepared. he had a neat stack of paperwork with his laptop and of course, his notebook. he adjusted his glasses while gazing out the window. it had snowed last night, with inches of thick snow covering the pathway. since his desk faced the window, decided to open it to at least have some cool breeze in while he worked. it would give me some form of productivity, he thought while also fully opening the window screen as well. He sighed contently, opening his laptop and started typing.

unbeknownst to him, a troublemaker was walking by.

osamu dazai, who just had a typical failed suicide attempt, was mopeing around like a teenager on a winter break, tossing his empty can of tomato juice around his hands. he was thinking about what he wanted for dinner. canned crab probably. with cheap beer. ten cans of beer, maybe. he whistled to himself and then stopped.

he saw kunikida. But, alas, kunikida did not see him. dazai felt his heart skip slightly, seeing him with a furrowed brow working diligently. His glasses were perched on top of his head, which made dazai slightly swoon-

nah. dazai thought. maybe my body is just wired to tease and bother the shit out of him. typical dazai-centric thoughts. dazai crept up towards kunikida’s apartment and started to slowly form a snowball (with his bare hands of course, because he hoped to also catch hypothermia). “KUNIIIIIKIDAAAAAAA!” dazai yelled, which caused kunikida to snap up his head to see the perpetrator. unfortunately, the snowball hit him.

square in the face.

the snowball slowly dripped from his face and onto his desk. dazai only grinned.

“...”

“...surprise?”

kunikida slowly got out of his chair, grabbed his coat, scarf and gloves, put on his snow boots and walked calmly outside where dazai was waiting with a cheshire-like smirk. he took and breath and screamed, “DAAAAAAZAAAAAAIIIII!” he started forming half-assed snowballs and started pelting dazai with him. dazai, on the other hand, was laughing maniacally like a person high on drugs, with a grin reaching his ears. the snow-covered ground became a battle-ground, the two engaging into a chaotic snowball fight. kunikida’s annoyance gradually turned into amusement as he threw, turning uncharacteristically carefree. the two laughed like children on a playground, the chunks of snow glistening, making it look like a hallmark christmas card. to a passerby’s eye, it looked like two grown assed men who were on drugs.

as the snowball fight continued, it got more competitive. kunikida had the sudden urge to outwit dazai, and started to become strategic, hiding behind various things and even building a snow fort. He began a pattern of throwing each snowball while dazai skillfully dodged his attacks and snapped back with his own. in the midst of the laughter, they found a shared joy of letting go of their burdens (well, mostly on kunikida’s part) and embracing the lightness of the moment. kunkida’s mind shifted away from his ideals, and dazai from his future suicide attempts. they just became two individuals enjoying each other’s company in the purest form of fun. Eventually, fatigue caught up to them, leaving their laughter to only breathless chuckles, with fog coming out of their mouth. they stood facing each other covered in snow with comfortable silence. dazai’s grin turned into a warm smile, brushing snow out of his hair. kunikida did the same with his coat.

“you know, kunikida,” dazai began, still trying to get a chunk of snow on his coat. “it’s good to let loose sometimes.” kunikida nodded, cleaning his glasses. “yes, I suppose you’re right,” he paused and cleared his throat, “for once.” dazai only laughed and went towards him, making kunikida hesitant and step back a little. he brushed more snow out of kunikida’s face which caused him to slightly flush. “you’re always being so uptight,” dazai said softly. “you should loosen up more.”

“...well, um, i-”

“also I have a confession to make,” dazai said seriously, which caused kunikida to twitch, making his ears turn red. “since you were (assuming) doing work, could you do…mine?”

“what.”

“okay here me out, so, um, i was busy having-”

“a one night stand,” kunikida interrupted. “or a suicide attempt. or drinking beer and zoning out.”

“...that’s not true! i was fooling around-, no, wait, um, i mean MENTORING, atsushi for his job with kyoka-”

kunikida turned around and started walking away. “H..Hey! Wait, PLEASE KUNIKIDAAA,” dazai went on his knees. “PLEASEEE, I PROMISE I’LL-”

kunikida sighed and stared back at him, his expression unreadable. “i’ll do it for you. but you have to do something, for once.” dazai beamed and dusted off the snow on his pants. “thanks, kunikida.”

awkward silence.

“...i’ll have to get going.” kunikida said, breaking the silence. “hm? oh, yeah.” dazai replied, sort of red-faced. probably the cold. kunikida guessed. “see you tomorrow! we should do this again,” dazai grinned. kunikida nodded.

they both go to their respective apartments, both smiling (kunikida’s almost barely noticeable). kunikida arrived back, taking off his shoes and closing his window for any further cautions. he was about to start his work, but he decided to take a small break, because after all, maybe the troublemaker, osamu dazai, was right.

⋆｡𖦹 °✩ 06.09.23, do not repost or translate my content :^)

[chaoticquill]

Beneath the Moonlight Preview!

It brings me great pleasure to post an excerpt from my BSD Halloween Zine piece, which is dumb, fluffy, and just a little spicy! But this part is completely innocent.

See more about the Zine and learn how to get a copy here!

[nonbinary-akutagawa]

Against Ideals

~paper version~

→Ao3←

→digital version←

[psylunari]

Hey! Would you look at that. Guess I sneezed (for four months straight, but shh), and another fic for this pairing is out.

I'm glad to announce my first Kunikidazai longfic: Dazai, Kunikida, Age Fourteen. It was first inspired by this fanart by bird app user KevinnScottland. TL;DR, what if these two met as teenagers?

The summary:

August 31st, 2003. Doppo Kunikida ditched his bike. He returned home awaiting a storm. Quickly, fearlessly, at the end of the summer break. Someone was in his way. A dustrag of a young man, with an empty stare and a sharp tongue. In the hostile, chaotic city, that was an unwise approach. Doppo offered him his umbrella. Choices are intriguing.

This was for the BSD Big Bang 2023, in partnership with PocketCultist on AO3 (who might release fanart as my teammate) and @chaoticquill as my beta reader for the English version. Be sure to check the event page, too! Teamwork for fanwork.

There is also a Brazilian Portuguese version, which is the original one, in case you can read it.

The first chapter is a whopping ~20,000 words long. I'm trying my best to see it as a “long first episode”. It should be 31 chapters long.

This fic has no update schedule. I will post when I finish chapters. Updates will be announced both here and on my Twitter account.

Fluff and angst, rated M at first. There are going to be additions to the tags/warnings and rating changes. More on the author's notes.

[statics-white-noise]

YAYYY NEW FIC!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAZAIIII!!!

[kn11ves]

bsd fic masterpost

"parallels" (LINK) ship: kunikida/dazai ch. 1: Kunikida gets shot in front of Dazai, then dies ch. 2: Dazai bleeds out on Kunikida's back after being shot

"god sent it to me, and told me to love" (LINK) ship: fyodor/ivan ch. 1: Ivan gets baptised (water-boarded) by Fyodor ch 2: Ivan slowly bleeds out, recollects how he met Fyodor

"a dog who bites every owner its ever had" (LINK) ship: fyodor/ivan, nikolai/ivan ch. 1: Ivan's life and crimes before Fyodor ch. 2: Fyodor introduces him to Nikolai, Ivan is deeply disturbed & obsessed ch. 3: Ivan tries to come to terms with his affection towards Nikolai after attempting to kill him

"you will have treasure in heaven" (LINK) ship: nathaniel/ivan ch. 1: nathaniel and ivan are forgotten together in a locked cellar, where they rot and speak to each other about life

"aftermath of a wildlife attack" (LINK) ship: fyodor/ivan ch. 1: fyodor deals with his ivan's death after meursault

[sickficideas]

SO I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO THINKS THAT KUNIKIDA HAS IBS?? 😭

I mean, this man is always so stressed and nervous, I imagine him coming back home after a long work day and curling up in bed and clutching his stomach because it feels so sore and nauseous... I WANT TO COMFORT HIM SO BAD.

ANON...ANON...!!!! I know this wasn't technically a request but you are such a genius I wrote a fic about this so fast LMAO I hope you like it <3

cast a spell || kunizai sickfic

ao3! emeto fic, mild nsfw themes at the end - please refer to this link for additional tags!

Kunikida really should have gone home early today. His stomach is not cutting him any slack.

He doesn't have the energy to change. All he can really manage is taking off his shoes and belt before he crawls into his bed. It's unlike him. He has a routine when he gets home. Light cleaning, checking the stock in his fridge, and various other things that his schedule details, but his body won't allow him to tonight. Any more time on his feet will have him hunched over the toilet again in no time.

His stomach has been sick since lunch. He isn't sure exactly what set it off today. He didn't try anything new. He was hoping it was a usual stress ache. He gets those so often that he's able to brush them off easily and keep working, but only about an hour before he left the agency, he found himself curled up beside the toilet in the bathroom and bringing up his still-digesting lunch, miserable and cradling his bloated and twisting tummy.

He's still sore and achy. He was in there for about a half over gagging and retching, long enough to get looks and questions when he walked back out into the office. He had to brush it off and pretend he felt better, but he didn't.

He groans quietly and he curls tighter on himself, arms wrapped around his middle. He thinks he should be used to this by now, but he isn't. It hurts, he's sore, he feels nauseous, he's almost certain he's going to throw up again tonight, and all he can do is be miserable about it until it happens.

Just as he's starting to let his exhaustion take over enough to relax, he hears his front door open, and footsteps start in the direction of his bedroom.

"Ugh…Dazai…?" he groans. He doesn't need to see or hear him. He knows those footsteps.

"The one and only," he sings, albeit more quietly than usual. Almost like he's being considerate. His footsteps stop, and although Kunikida has his back turned to his bedroom door, he imagines Dazai leaning against the frame. "Not feeling good, huh, Kunikida?"

"I'll be fine. Just need to lie down for a while," Kunikida mumbles. He feels his stomach churn uncomfortably and he has to shift to take some of the pressure off of it. He has some hope that he'll be able to finish his house chores later after some rest, but he almost never gets that lucky. Especially not with how sick his stomach has been today.

"Take any medicine?" Dazai asks.

"No," Kunikida huffs.

"Where is it?"

"I'm not telling you where my medication is, Dazai," Kunikida grumbles, forcing himself to sit up. Dazai makes a good point, though, he should probably take something to help with the nausea and pain before he rests.

"Aww, come on. I was just trying to help," Dazai whines. He's pouting in the doorway.

"I don't trust you," Kunikida mumbles as he stands up, taking a few deep breaths in the hope that it'll calm down his stomach enough for him to get up.

He walks by Dazai with a pained groan into the kitchen. The nausea is suddenly much worse, but he should have expected it to be. He's hoping he can just take some medicine and go rest, but by the time he makes it to the kitchen, he has to rethink his strategy. He burps into a closed fist, and then again, wet and acidic, bringing up a few chunks of his lunch to coat his tongue, just like last time.

"Uhhgh…uhrrp - "

He feels whatever is left in his stomach make a reappearance at the back of his throat, and he thanks whatever coincidence that forced him to stand up that he's next to the sink, because he bends over it with an arm around his middle to bring up his stomach contents with a sick splatter into it. His stomach twists and he groans from the pain, only to burp up another mouthful of bile, burning the back of his throat.

"You still have something left in there?" Dazai says, suddenly appearing behind him. He feels Dazai take his ponytail and lay something on the back of his neck that makes him shiver - a damp washcloth. It feels good. "Just get it up, you'll feel better soon."

It helps him focus his breathing a little bit. His breaths are interrupted by nauseous burps here and there, attempts to get something up, but he thinks he might be done. He spits out a wad of saliva into the sink with a pained moan before he straightens up, but as soon as he does, his glasses fall off of the top of his head and join his stomach contents in the sink, splashing up some at the sides of the sink.

He forgot he put those there. Of course this would happen to him. He almost reaches in to pick them up, but the thought of having to clean vomit off of his glasses just brings the nausea back in full swing, and he chokes up a wave of digested food and bile that he didn't know he had left in him, splashing on top of his glasses.

"Hhurk…ahh…"

He spits again with an opened-mouth moan, letting the last of the saliva-vomit mixture leave his mouth. He feels his stomach calm down, just enough for him to feel safe enough to step back from the sink.

"Where'd you learn that washcloth trick," Kunikida murmurs, rubbing at his temple. "Ugh…"

"I've never seen it actually help nausea before. But it's good for calming people down," Dazai says. 

A classic evasion of Kunikida's question, but he decides not to pry. He opens the fridge in search of his nausea medication - he spots it, using the door to hide it from Dazai's view, takes a swig out of the cap, and closes the door again.

"You don't wanna go see Yosano?" Dazai asks once the door is shut and they're face to face.

"There's not much she can do," Kunikida says with an exhausted sigh. She's tried, for sure. "It's just the same shit as usual."

Dazai pouts. "You think they'd have some sort of treatment for it by now."

"You'd think," Kunikida agrees. For now, he just has to deal with it. He has to conceal another burp and swallow back a bit of the liquid medicine that bubbles up with it. He just has to hope it stays down long enough to help his stomach feel a little better. "Have you eaten?"

"Nope. Just got here," Dazai says.

"There's leftovers in the fridge. Eat them," Kunikida says.

"You don't want them?" Dazai asks.

"I don't think I'll be able to stomach anything else tonight," Kunikida sighs. "Eat it, you didn't have lunch. And please don't touch any of the medication in there. I don't feel like gagging you to prevent an overdose."

"Okay, okay. Only 'cause you don't feel good," Dazai says, opening the fridge.

While he's up, he decides to change into something he can comfortably rest in. He's worried if he lays down the medicine will come right back up while he's lying on his side. He tries to remember to take deep breaths, it's the only thing that really keeps those sharp, uncomfortable twists of his stomach at bay. He hates throwing up, but he's hoping it stays just that, and doesn't continue with both ends tonight. He can only handle so much.

He crawls back into bed with a drawn-out moan, pressing against his bloated tummy. He takes one of his pillows and wraps his arms tight around it. It's comforting, for some reason.

Just as he's starting to shut his eyes again, he feels Dazai crawl into bed behind him and press a kiss against his temple.

"You sap," Kunikida groans.

"You sap. Look how red your ears got," Dazai teases, lightly tugging at the tip before he settles in next to him, ducking his head into the nape of his neck. "I'll be here, so tell me if you need anything. Also, I cleaned your glasses."

Kunikida thinks Dazai sounds just as tired as he is. He's not sure how useful he'll be, but he appreciates his presence. His warmth is comforting. It always has been. Dazai sneaks a hand under Kunikida's sleep shirt, just over his hip, and starts to rub circles.

"I'm surprised you're not bursting a blood vessel over not finishing your schedule today," Dazai teases.

"You have no idea how stressed I am about it," Kunikida mumbles, his stomach rolling at the thought that he'll just have more to do tomorrow. He groans and sucks in air through his teeth when Dazai's fingers press a bit too hard on a tender spot.

"Sorry, did that hurt?" he asks.

"Just - just a bit," he says as Dazai settles into a gentler rhythm. "It feels good, though."

"Good," Dazai says, "and don't stress yourself out. I'll help you catch up."

Kunikida has his doubts about that, but Dazai sounds sincere in the moment. He almost sounds sweet. Kunikida starts to have a miniature mental crisis about his situationship with Dazai. The way Dazai is pressed up against him, his forehead tucked into the back of his neck like it fits perfectly there, gently rubbing soothing circles into his aching, nauseous tummy. Sure, they've fooled around before, a bit more than they should, but Dazai doesn't seem to be looking for any of that right now. He's really just sticking around because Kunikida isn't feeling good.

Dazai makes him more stressed than he realizes. His cheeks heat up and his stomach lurches again, but he manages to keep it down swallowing the acid back. He's sure Dazai noticed, but he doesn't comment.

"Surprised you're not grossed out by all this," Kunikida murmurs, letting his eyes fall shut. He takes a hand to lay over Dazai's, silently guiding him a bit closer to his navel, and Dazai obliges. Kunikida doesn't bother holding back a moan.

"It's whatever. I feel like we see way grosser stuff at work," Dazai says casually.

"Fair enough," Kunikida says.

"You really like this," Dazai says through something that almost resembles a giggle. "I can hear your little moans in your throat here. It's cute."

"It feels good," Kunikida defends again. It feels like Dazai is rubbing out all of the sore spots in his tummy. "You're good at it."

"I'm glad it feels good," Dazai says, pressing a kiss to the back of his neck. Kunikida feels his face flush. "Your poor tummy. I can really feel it bubbling in there…"

Dazai moves up from where he's been lying down, and Kunikida didn't realize he's taken his shirt off, although, he's still covered in bandages. He lays an ear up to Kunikida's stomach, which sends a shiver up his spine.

"Ohh…my poor Kunikida," he says in a pouty voice before he presses a gentle kiss up against it and lays back up against Kunikida's back.

"Your Kunikida?" Kunikida scoffs.

"Mhm…do you belong to anyone else?" Dazai against, nuzzling up into his neck. Kunikida has to admit, he's not sure if Dazai's doing this on purpose, but his stress and stomachache isn't what's at the front of his mind anymore. "I think we need to get some of these bubbles up…"

Dazai's gentle rubs start to get a little more rough, deeper, and Kunikida moans. He thinks he's asking him to burp, which he's not entirely sure he can do without bringing up bile into his mouth, but he'll try. He manages a few little ones, none sounding particularly wet, but after a few comes one that lasts a few seconds.

"Ugmhhuurp…" he swallows back another tiny splash of vomit that came back up and he lays his hand over Dazai's, "hurrk…ah - ahh, ugh, Dazai, not so rough…"

"Sorry, babe," Dazai says gently. "That was good, I think you needed that…"

He does feel a little bit better.

"Maybe," Kunikida groans, although, he can't deny he likes the way Dazai is acting with him right now. He can't admit it out loud, but it's obvious he already knows.

"Love you," Dazai murmurs quietly. His rubs start to slow down, but Kunikida doesn't mind. He's starting to fall asleep himself, and Dazai's really helped his nausea so far, somehow.

"Love you too," Kunikida murmurs quietly, surprised that his half-asleep brain is agreeing to something so quickly. As he starts to slip into a dream, he wonders if Dazai is casting a spell on him. "Thank you."

"Mmm…"

[psylunari]

The guyssss! Tumblr gets to see them too! So, what can I say about this future fic…? Hmm. A few pointers:

There was a “prequel” doodle to this piece;

It's specifically an Edo period AU. They were born in 1689;

The title contains wordplay;

It is and isn't “canonverse”. That's tough to explain;

Their relationship is TL;DR-ed as a shudo one. It starts out rather unconventionally, and grows greater than the mold as time goes on;

Expect artistic/creative license, mostly under the “excuse” of BSD history diverging from the real world one. Some things will be the same, others will not. Which ones? Not even I can list all;

If a reader is knowledgeable about similar works, the fanart has a bunch of hidden hints in plain sight. You all are free to guess what it is. :3c

Thanks for having me as a client. I hope there will be more opportunities~

“What a blessed day, don’t you agree?” “Do I?” “If the gods haven’t smiled upon us, I don’t know what it was, then. Would you look at the color of these swords? They’re magnificent. It wasn’t a lie from the young seller. You know how they can be.” “I’m unsure if I follow…” “Squint harder. I’ve never seen anything made of isu with this vivid shade of pink.” “Isu?” “Isu-no-ki.” “Why would it be made of isu-no-ki?” “Why else? To keep your lovely face intact. Isu-no-ki doesn’t castigate as hard as others. It’s an excellent first wooden sword.” “I see…”

A little scene for @psylunari's fic titled 心中譚 (Shinchuutan): From Rock Bottom Of My Heart! The fic is still a wip, so do look forward to their works!

Thank you so much for commissioning me!!!

[gay-snufkin]

kunidazai fluff???? finally??? it's more likely than you think

based on the headcanon that when kunikida learns that atsushi and kyouka missed a lot of basic math eduaction he starts teaching them. also dazai is in love

[kiwi-fr0g]

I’ve decided I’m going to start writing fanfiction on ao3 i’m working on a kunidazai sick fic currently 

My username on Ao3 is kiwi_frog I use the same username for everything 

[croissantconnoisseurdinosaur]

Listen, I won't lie to ya'll... This popped into my head again, and I still won't write it for real, BUT I will say I have an update from my brain:

Dazai obviously has a handful of friends to help him through the grief, but there comes a time when they have to let him stand on his own two feet.

He can't.

One night Baby (2yo) is throwing a tantrum because she misses Mommy and Papa and she doesn't want Dad anymore. She's scared and confused, and angry at Dazai for being the only parent she's seen the last few weeks. She screams for y/n and Chuuya, and Dazai has a meltdown where he has to call Yosano and Kunikida for help again because he WILL khs in front of this baby if they don't come help him soon.

Yosano and Kunikida come over and help calm him and the Baby, and sleep over (Yosano and Kunikida each taking up a separate section of the large couch in the living room).

Dazai lets Yosano go back to her life, but he keeps begging Kunikida to stay with him. He eventually moves in after too many consecutive sleepovers, and accepts his fate as roomie.

CUE A COUPLE OF YEARS OF A BUDDY DADDIES SITUATION, Kunikida helping raise this child while sleeping on an air mattress in Dazai's room - while still trying to find a woman to fit his ideals.

Dazai eventually tries for a few meaningless flings with a couple meaningless men and women after about a year, but he's terrible at casual romance - even without a baby and a platonic-coparent/literal-roomie complicating his life. (Think canon Dazai, but worse, and horribly heartbroken. Racked with survivor's guilt, and absolutely unable to even entertain the idea of a date with a potential new partner without being completely wasted and ruining the night - repeatedly sabotaging himself despite the constant gnawing ache of wanting to find someone and feel loved again. -> Bonus: he realizes Kunikida loves him (even if platonically, at first) every time he cleans up his drunken messes and heartbreaks, and it actually fills that void for him for a little bit, so he can just focus on being a good father).

Dazai obviously has horrific nightmares from this whole thing, and it's heartbreaking. One night early on, from the air mattress on Dazai's floor, Kunikida wakes up to him screaming and crying after jolting awake from his sleep, and has to comfort him through literal Hell every time he has to relive your deaths in night terrors.  But hey, it sparks the two bed troupe because Dazai cries into his shoulder and clings onto his bicep so tightly Kunikida can’t leave him, so he lays down and sleeps in his bed, holding him while Dazai continues to weep into his chest until he falls asleep — still sniffling and crying even in his sleep.  Kunikida doesn’t develop feelings quite yet at this point, but it strengthens their bond.

UNTIL,

Years of sleeping in the same bed every night (they just ditch the air mattress altogether), practically playing house, comforting him, taking care of him, loving him platonically, parenting his daughter, watching him grow into an admirably wonderful father, and getting jealous of first-date-lovers who are never good enough for him- OH, OH NO, ARE THOSE FEELINGS? SAY IT AIN'T SO,

And it takes a few years, and a whole bunch of heartbreaks for both of them (plus a little bit of accidental matchmaking from the 5 year old who tells everyone she has 2 Daddies, so everyone thinks they're a gay couple and it puts the idea in their head) for them to both realize that maybe Kunikida's ideals can be rewritten to include Dazai, and maybe this domestic little life has fit right into his little notebook all along. <3

THERE, I DID IT, I MADE IT WORSE

Cursed Soukoku x y/n fic idea

IDEA: Imagine a fic with Soukoku x afab y/n, and after giving birth to a baby that's half Chuuya, y/n and Chuuya both die tragically, leaving Dazai to raise a baby that's not biologically his, but made up of the two people he loved most in the world.

That's it.

I'm not writing it, but I did sure imagine it for a second.

[panic-at-the-gender]

I read an angst and now I’m the sad

Here have the link