#kino details

[daretolovemyrambling]

the Medarda Clan

(picture above is from the arcane artbook, it's concept art for Mel, Kino, Ambessa and Kino's unnamed father. Mel's father isn't named or shown anywhere yet)

I don't think Arcane necessarily retconned this, so I wanted to talk about the Medarda Clan in the League of Legends Universe.

Mel Medarda, while banished from Noxus, likely still retained a high status because a part of the Medarda family also resides in Piltover.

It makes sense that Medarda family members don't just reside in Noxus. Ambessa says herself that she send Mel to Piltover in order to oversee their family's interests. And would it really be called "Medarda House" by Piltover residents if only Mel is in it? Mel would have also been only about 23 when she enters Piltover and 26 when she was a councelor in season 1 act 1 (here is a timeline I made for arcane: x) it's insane, even for her, to establish a well respected house in such a short time in Piltover.

In Legends of Runeterra (a Riot card game that explores the world of Runeterra in more detail), there is a card named Jae Medarda.

His description reads: "Heir apparent to Piltover's prestigious Clan Medarda, Jae preferred hunting ancient artifacts over managing the family business... much to his father's chagrin."

There also some other Medarda family members that we know of; on the League website you can find a map named "Medarda Heirloom", it shows trading routes the Medarda's use. It's a pretty old map though, I think it's from 2016 so I wouldn't really say this very relevant.

On the map you can find a letter by a Medarda Merchant named Jago writen to his nephew, Salob, who seems at risk of being banished.

I tried my best to make out every word:

Nephew Salob,

As much as I am forced to admire your frankly staggering & baffling level of self-belief in the face of numerous failures, failures that would have punctured the ego of the staunchest Zaunite braggart. I would like to confirm, in writing, that control of the Medarda Clan's commerical portfolio and access to the clan trade map. Which you have long coveted, shall not be granted to you - not now - not in time - nor never.

I suggest you take on a profession more befitting your natural talents - perhaps as a chem-lamp lighter - and be grateful to your aunt, my dear wife, that your ties with the clan are not severed completly.

This will be the end of the matter.

Sincerly,

Jago Medarda

The Medarda family seems to love exiling children that don't fit into the family.

I think Jago is now kind of retconned if Arcane is the new canon, or he's at the very least not the head of the clan and has married into the family. Sun Gates are what made a lot of the families in Piltover rich 200 years ago, it's not mentioned in arcane but we do see them in some arcane maps.

In Arcane Ambessa mentions that she fought battles from the Bloodcliffs to the Dalamor Plains. The Black Rose mentions that she might have had an affair while travelling through Basilich, at least fake-Kino claims that this is the area he heard rumors about Ambessa's affair in. I marked all these places with a red dot on the Runeterra map. Basilich is a Port City, if the affair really did happen here, Mel's father could be from any place in Runeterra.

I'm hoping they will expand on the Medarda family in the future, the Ambessa book will likely have some interesting lore about them in it. It comes out in Feb 2025.

From the Synopsis we already know that there will be a cousin of Ambessa that is named Ta’Fik. I'm guessing he knows that Ambessa had an affair and has bad blood with the Black Rose.

Ambessa Medarda: Warrior, general, mother. She is a woman to be feared, and the Medardas are unrivaled in their pursuit of glory. She has led conquests and armies. She has slain legendary beasts. She has made grave sacrifices in her ascent up the ranks. And for this she was rewarded: She entered the realm of death and was granted a vision of herself upon the throne of the vast Noxian empire. But before she can lead her empire, she must become head of her own clan. Yet the title is contested by her cousin and former confidante, Ta’Fik. He knows the bloody sins of Ambessa’s past. And he knows he cannot allow her to rise. They will fight a war for the very soul of the Medardas. But the war won’t be fought on battlefields alone. Ambessa’s daughter, Mel, can deftly break through the walls around anyone’s heart, and she’ll put her talents to use for her mother. Yet despite Mel’s strength, Ambessa sees only a child who lacks her killer instincts. Mel knows she can be the leader Ambessa wants her to be, if only she gives her time. With her family betraying her, enemies closing in on all sides, and unseen forces moving in the shadows, every day proves more dangerous than the last. But Ambessa will not bow. She will burn the world down to claim her place in it.

[biddy-biddy-biddy]

something silly

[thegothicchangeling]

I watched the blood sweat and tears mv multiple times, and there seems to be some discourse in the fandom over whether Ambessa miscarried. One argument agaisnt this is that the child she sees in her vision is Kino and shes pregnant with Mel in the video. Though I do think the fetus shown is definitely Mel, I don't think it's the same pregnancy.

The gold eyed fetus isn't shown until after we see Ambessa when she's older. In her first pregnancy, she looks like she couldn't be older than twenty, and we know based on Mel's age and how old Ambessa appears in Arcane s1 that she probably had her daughter when she was in her early to mid thirties.

Also, I don't think the stone child represents Kino. I think it represents her younger self, or maybe how she imagined her unborn baby would be.

Additionally, there's a squelch near the beginning of the video, before Ambessa's vision, that implies blood. Though there's a spear sticking through her, she's holding her belly. That context clue basically confirms to me that her baby didn't survive.

Another thing: when Ambessa sits down on her throne, there's a close up shot of her flat stomach. We all know that in Arcane, every detail is intentional.

One more thing: there's a spear in her. Even if it's above her belly, injuries often cause miscarriage as a means of protection to the pregnant person. When you need to heal, you can't have something sapping your strength from you.

[frosty-tian]

Been on the furry grind lately.

She may be sweet and caring but don’t be fooled, she can suplex people with much ease and literally butts heads with fellow antler-havers as a past-time.

The flowers on her antlers can be replaced with pretty much any accessories, usually it’s the managers who decorate them (they all have fun).

[animeglitch]

[elleskinner-justart]

Today is her fictional birthday so let's spam the dash with some Mako-chan sketches!

Makoto Kino is best girl, I will hear no arguments at this time.

[let-them-fight]

jar jar was never annoying btw the world just couldn’t handle his unmedicated adhd swagger

[claitea]

finished the dlc! enjoyed it a lot :D

[aikawa-kazuki]

I'm kind of sad that my edit didn't get many notes ): it took me so long to clean that up but hey at least I got new lockscreen with nick serving full pussy

[kino-rogers]

we won't talk about backgrounds but i hc that Kiwi (she/they), my Bullet Train oc, is a Rave Rat and they absolutely manage to convince Tangerine and Lemon to go to raves w/ them, just cause of what they wear out to them and of course, she uses that scary dog privilege to their advantage 🤭

all this to say i drew Kiwi in a rave fit pfff

[ominous-light]

I am once again drawing OCs

[hunny-lamb]

Thinking about how in OK! 1998, the ribbon in Laurey's hair in Act 1 is a torn strip of the same fabric as Curly's shirt ,,,,

[peachdues]

ALL THE THINGS WE LEFT UNSAID — PROLOGUE + TEASER

Tengen’s Bundle of Joy • Secret Pregnancy AU

A/N: surprise! Have a first look at Tengen’s installment of my Bundle of Joy series.

This fic will be multi-part canon-AU. It is a non-linear story (alternating between Then and Now) and double surprise! It will be a slow burn (just because they fuck doesn’t mean they’re in love!)

CW: MDNI • this story features explicit sexual content • secret pregnancy • angst • mentions of injury/head wound • these two are stubborn as fuck lmao

PROLOGUE

“The Sound Hashira is rumored to be in this region. Some mission.”

Your comrade’s off-handed comment freezes you in your step.

“Where.”

Your fellow Kinoe shrugs, unaware of the way your eyes dart anxiously around the clutter of wooden homes and ramshackle shops, as though you half-expect the silver-haired swordsman to leap out from the shadows at any moment.

“It’s not like we get details of the Hashira’s missions shared with us,” he brushes you off with a yawn. His arms fold behind his head, his gait lazy and far too casual for someone of his position as he struts lazily along an uneven path that leads to the small building marked with a fading, painted wisteria crest. “We might be Kinoe, but we’re still bottom feeders compared to them.”

You hum in half-hearted agreement, but your attention to your fellow Slayer — to your mission — flounders as the knowledge you’ve worked desperately ignore explodes out of the mental bottle you’d shoved it into.

Beneath the ever-tightening buttons of your uniform shirt your stomach has begun to swell. Slight; not yet noticeable to the naked eye, but sure as hell prominent when you’re fighting to close the last two buttons or fasten your hakama pants.

You thumb absently at your belt — now loosened two notches. Perhaps you’ll take a cue from the Love Pillar’s book and opt for a skirt. At least the waist would sit higher up, the pleats, offering cover you’ll need while you figure out what the fuck it is you’re going to do. It won’t be long before your secret is exposed; before word inevitably reaches the jewel-crusted ears of the very one you want most to avoid.

You’d be more useful dead.

A callous thing to say to a subordinate, let alone someone who’d risked their neck on more than one occasion to preserve his. And, for all the testiness that had built between you over the years, a resentment born of your mutual inability to confront the other honestly, you hadn’t expected him to resort to that.

You’d known he regretted his words the moment he hurled them your way, but it was too little, too late. And it hadn’t stopped you from leveling his ire with your own, your response a series of poisoned darts you were only happy to launch right back his way.

I look forward to meeting your expectations.

But it was his regret, perhaps, that led him to grab you by the bicep as you’d tried to leave, that yanked you back to face him, breath heavy and pupils dilating.

The crack fissuring across your chest had been dulled by the way his hand swallowed your arm; how his mouth crashed into yours, and the powerful movements of his body. But once he’d collapsed atop you, panting and spent, the wounds he’d inflicted turned raw once more, the salt of his sweat preventing your blood from clotting where he’d torn your chest clean open.

You manage a furtive shake of your head, dispersing the memory of his body and his violence from your mind. This is not the time for you to pick at the scab over your heart, not after you spent the better part of the last two months trying to force it to form. For now, you need to focus on getting the hell out of here; to get as far away from this desolate corner of the earth before the universe decides to throw you back at him.

Before he knows.

Your comrade prattles on, bragging over how he’s been lucky enough to see the Sound Pillar in battle, oblivious to the smirk settling on your lips in spite of yourself. The Kinoe you’ve traveled with seems unaware that in detailing the way the Corp’s great Uzui had appeared out of thin air to save him and the handful of other slayers cornered by a particularly fearsome avian demon, he’s admitting to his own ineptitude in finishing off the beast on his own.

The Hashira don’t come unless hope is lost; the fact Uzui had appeared at all meant they’d been done for. Yet, he wears the boast of having needed his ass saved by one who’d undoubtedly disposed of the demon with a painful swiftness like a badge of honor.

You know better.

For all the ways your fellow swordsman brags over having witnessed the Pillar’s great display of strength, you’ve seen him weak. Not only that, but you’d been the direct cause of such weakness; you’d broken him down, made him give into temptations he believed he’d suppressed.

But that weakness has led you here — chewing on your thumbnail in a fit of anxiety your comrade remains woefully ignorant of as you try banishing the memories of the Sound Pillar’s weakness from your mind.

More, you’d begged him, sweaty and panting and delirious. More.

He’d obliged you — enthusiastically so. And the way you’d fallen apart in his arms showed you that you were just as weak as he.

Not once had he bothered to apologize for what he’d done; what he’d said. And his too casual pronouncement that your death — as gruesome and violent as your profession demanded — would be a better convenience than for him to work through his own bullshit was a slash through your chest even his most fervent apologies wouldn’t be able to stitch back together.

Not that you thought he ever would offer one — but the image of him dropping to his knees and begging you for forgiveness you wouldn’t allow yourself to give was a small comfort to your bitter heart.

Besides, you’d claimed the privilege of having the last word by not saying any at all. Instead, you’d crept away from the inn, leaving him asleep on the discarded heap of his uniform in the room you’d been forced to share.

You’d given him exactly what he’d given you — nothing. And that vindication had been as sweet as it was short-lived. Now, you’re stuck with the consequences of your own pride and weakness without any idea of what to do about it.

Feigning indifference where Tengen Uzui was concerned, however, is your speciality; a skill you’d perfected just as surely as you’d mastered shadow breathing. Thus, the mask of cool neutrality is easy to slip on as you listen to your comrade continue prattling on about skill levels and techniques to improve breathing styles, chiming with a mildly interested nod when necessary.

And you plot; plot your escape from this tiny fishing village, plot how best to guard the secret you know won’t remain such for much longer. Running away from your problems had always been far easier than forcing yourself to choke them down, and this time will be no different. Of that much, you’re certain.

Coward, a voice that sounds suspiciously close to Uzui’s hisses in your head. Coward.

And so, you continue to strategize your best chance at avoiding the storm brimming on your horizon as your fellow Kinoe continues, too consumed by his blustering to notice how your had drifts to your stomach, resting on the hidden curve where the Sound Hashira’s child grows.

—-

BONUS

“The baby — the baby —“

“Where?” Tengen surveys the wreckage scattered around you, ears carefully pricked for any cry, any smaller, weaker heartbeat, but for all his strain, he can discern none. “Was it a village kid?” He jostles you as much as he can, trying to force your eyes into focus. “Where, Y/N?”

But you only keep muttering the baby, your brow furrowed, your head twitching as though in dissent, though it remains limited where it is braced in the crook of Tengen’s massive arm.

He swears under his breath as your eyes roll into your head, your lips straining to form the mantra you cannot stop repeating, even as your breath turns shallow and raspy. Two fingers find the pulse point in your neck, and Tengen swears again at weakened beat of your heart.

“You don’t get to die.” He snaps at you, hand slapping lightly at your bloodied cheek. “You don’t get to run away. Not now. Not again.”

He needs to figure out where else you might be injured — that way he can help, can stabilize you before the Kakushi arrive. You’re not taking the easy way out this time. He would stand at the gates of heaven or hell itself to block your way, ready to haul your ass right back to life so he could chew your ass out the way you so obviously needed. And once he did, he can put this volatile, tempestuous thing between you to rest. He can free himself of the bonds you’d snapped around his wrists the moment you first sized him up and cut him down with a few, caustic words.

Then, he might finally be able to let you go.

Gritting his teeth, Tengen surveys your body. Your head wound is the most prominent, but no matter how much blood mats in your hair and streaks down your face, he knows better than to assume that it’s the worst you’ve sustained.

Gently, his hands smooth along your body, and he notes every odd bend, every lump along your joints that does not belong.

“The ba — baby —“ your voice grows fainter with each word, and Tengen can only see a sliver of white peeking out from between your eyelids.

Beneath the dark crimson of your blood your skin has turned ashen.

“Y/N.” The hoarseness of his voice has nothing to do with the smoldering flames and thick smoke that has burned the village to its skeleton. His hand slides to your abdomen, ready to position you in his arms so he can run with you, can tow you to the nearest Kakushi. You will not die; he forbids it, he forbids you from even trying —

His hand settles on your navel and freezes.

Beneath the flush of his palm is a curve; an outward swelling of your stomach that had been hidden under the loose fit of your uniform shirt, but under his touch, it is unmistakeable.

A bump. A sizeable bump extends from your abdomen.

The grunts and groans of the houses and structures giving way to the crackling flames fall away, his ears filling instant with a high-pitched ring that pulses in time with his thundering heart. The sweat rolling down his neck turns cold, his chest tightening until his lungs burn. Slowly, his eyes drag back up your body until he finds your graying face once more.

For one, brief moment, your eyes flutter open and search wildly before landing on his, wide and frozen in his horror.

“The baby.” You say once more, in explanation and confession. And then your eyes roll back into your skull and you turn limp in Tengen’s trembling arms.

[1920sladydectective]

Best Friend's Mother Ch.4 3.9K

Here's chapter four of the @shinyshayminflower prompt story!

I hope you like it! Love you lots and lots, you can find the other parts on this account or on AO3.

Angst and Feels, no smut for this chapter.

Not again? You were going to throw up. You knew she didn’t love you, but you were foolishly surprised she had fucked Mel’s friends before. 

“Why?” Mel’s tipsy voice was hoarse, eyes shining as she looked between you, “Why couldn’t I have one thing that was mine”

You wanted the ground to swallow you, you wanted to kill Ambessa, you wanted to word vomit apologies and explanations. Your tongue was lead in your mouth. 

“Mel,” Ambessa’s tone was neutral.

“And it had to be her,” Mel whimpered, “because who other than the only best friend I’ve ever had? Only the best for Ambessa Medarda,” 

“I’m so sorry, it’s my fault too,” It ripped from you, suddenly spurred into action,”God, I-I, Mel I love you,” 

Her eyes darkened, a stuttered breath, “And that’s why you stuck your tongue down her throat, is it?”

“No, no,” Your whole world was falling apart, “I didn’t want this to happen, you’re my best friend,” 

Her bitter laugh killed you. You stood there, slaughtered, as the two Medardas began to argue in hushed tones. As quickly as her fight had ignited, it had died a distraught death. Alcohol and anger merging to create a half person. You barely caught what was said, though Mel’s muffled sobs were obvious, as was Ambessa’s motherly tone. 

It felt like a joke, some bad sitcom. Your lips were still warm, smudged crimson. 

She had moved off of you, swaying towards her daughter as if to calm her. Hushed whispers swirled around you. You lent, shivering and destroyed, against the fridge as they held one another. Their relationship would survive, of course it would, they were mother and daughter. They had a place for one another in their hearts. 

Where did that leave you then? Chopped liver, used and discarded at a moment’s notice. It was clear that this was not going to be discussed properly tonight, so you were an unnecessary detail they had shelved for later. Water sloshed about in your vision, sharp feedback ringing in your ears. 

Icy hands wiped pathetically at stray tears as you gulped, walking around the kitchen island with a slur from your lips about leaving them to it. You had the good sense to pat an incoming Rictus on the shoulder. 

“Lock the kitchen door,” It was hurried, “Mel and Ambessa are having a bit of a moment,” 

“And you?” His quiet tone made you gulp. 

“I am going to bed, tell Kino I drank too much and started throwing up so you helped me to bed,” 

“Yes Miss,” He’d never called you Miss before.

Unsteady, foal legs propelled you up the stairs as you sucked in small, stifled gasps for air. The sight of your room dropped you into the abyss, vision blurring as everything dialed to a thousand. This was it. You were so beyond fucked. It took black spots dancing around your eyes for you to remember to breathe, nails cutting your palms as you rocked back and forth on the plush carpet. 

Her face, shattered and pleading, was burned against your eyes like an old TV screen. Permanently fixed, the colours faded and warped. She had been so quick to hate her mother, her fury for you burning slow and low as it waited in the wings. You were no fool, a cat fight and some wine was not going to solve this. She had chosen you, allowed you into all areas of her life, and you had obliterated that trust, whether it had been your intention or not. She would never know how much you cherished her for now each word would be laced with guilt, rendered insincere upon arrival with little more than a cursory glance. 

Then, bitterly, your heart remembered Ambessa. You had never been special, had never been anything and you hadn’t even been the first. Mel had trusted you despite her mother’s history, because it was you and you were her best friend. You deserved every bad thing, grunting as your palms crushed your streaming eyes in an attempt to staunch the flow. None of this had gone to plan. You couldn’t understand why she’d kissed you in the first place, the memory of her kind eyes like a hot poker to the heart. You’d ended it, later than you should have, but you’d done the right fucking thing. 

Stripping naked, you crawled under the spray of icy water. It dulled you, skin becoming numb to the shower’s harsh droplets. Your cries were silent, measured, as if afraid to take up too much space. Golden glitter rotted away to reveal the monster underneath. You stayed like that for longer than was healthy, delirious limbs pulling you out as you drifted in and out. Cosy, fluffy pyjamas warmed you through as you sat, silent and empty on the bed staring at your laptop screen. 

Ever practical, you had shoved it all down in favour of a plan. First of all, you needed new student accommodation. There was no way Mel would want you living with her now and you needed to get ahead of that curve. You were sitting in a Manor house, scrolling through spare room listings like a zombie. It was three days till Christmas. You wanted to disappear. 

At some point you passed out, body slumped and shattered. 

Flecks of sunlight woke you, throat dry and face stinging. On autopilot you got ready for the day, and then just kept going. All your things were neatly folded, stuffed into a tired suitcase and sealed away. You would give Mel whatever conversation she needed and then you would leave, because it was what was necessary. 

Mel had sent you one text. Seeing her name made you dizzy. 

Breakfast Table, 10am. 

                                      Be right down. 

The house was empty save the three of you, you would learn. Rictus had dragged a hungover Kino out to facilitate this chat. You arrived in the kitchen to Mel and Ambessa sitting quietly side by side with mugs, one for you placed on the opposite side. 

A united front, two against one. Fantastic. How the fuck was that fair? What happened to how could she? 

“Morning,” You hated how unsteady your voice sounded, sitting primly in the wooden chair. 

“Sleep okay?” Mel asked, eyes unsure. 

You would have rathered if she called you a Cunt. Pleasantries had no place here. “FIne,” 

“Shall we start then?” Ambessa said, gaze focused on her daughter. 

Like it was a business meeting, and you? Their troublesome employee. 

It started rather structured, Mel had access to more facts than you’d anticipated. You were clearly not important enough to be there at the start of this conversation then. She knew when it started, when it stopped and when it started again. She was pragmatic and clearly emotionally dissociated, the events of the past twelve hours wrecking you all. You fought back a bit there, there was no restarting. 

“She kissed me,” You grumbled, barely able to look at her. 

“You kissed back, quite hard” It would have been teasing, your mind wished it was. 

“Mum,” Mel’s voice was clear, her look piercing. It was hard to gauge the dynamic here, they were on the same side but Ambessa faced far more aggression than you did. Repeat offender problems, perhaps.

“Neither of you cared about how this would make me feel,” It was the same tone from the night before, cutting harshly from a sober mouth.

“I did,” You cried, hands beginning to tremble again, “I do,” 

“If you did, you would have told me months ago,” Mel snapped.

“I know,” your gaze was distant, trapped in memories, “I made the wrong choices and have no excuse for them,” 

“We’ve both made mistakes Mel,” Ambessa’s tone was honey, “We love you, we want to know how to move past them,” 

Her use of ‘we’ made you twitch. As always, she had no problem speaking for you. Still, it seemed she was searching to heal your relationship with Mel as well as her own. Your heart glowed, you shoved it in a safe. 

“You can move past them by keeping your hands to yourself, Mum,” She snapped. In another, better timeline you would have giggled. 

Ambessa simply leaned back, taking a swig. 

“I just want to know why she did it,” Mel muttered, more lost than you’d ever seen her as she turned to you, “Mum I get, she’s done it before, but why did you?”

It was the worst question to ask, because you’d realised somewhere in those wallowing autumn nights that the love had bloomed even before she bent you over that island. Your motivator had always been love and that felt more pathetic than anything. It was the first time you looked to Ambessa on purpose, eyes panicked, yearning for even a dust speck of the comfort she was giving Mel. To your ultimate surprise you found it, crinkled eyes steady and holding you up just for a second before they looked away. That was the final nail in the coffin. 

Mel saw it before you even attempted words. You subconsciously braced for screams or laughter, but were met with a pained gasp. 

“Oh no,” Mel’s voice was soft, pitying “You didn’t,”

“Spare me,” It was a scoff, the cry of a wounded animal, “I know how stupid I am, kay?”

“Mum, go check on Mina,” Mel’s voice was dismissive, practically shoving a protesting Ambessa away. 

Ambessa left begrudgingly and the scales shifted, evening out. 

She didn’t speak for a long time, her face fixed in contemplation. It was the same face that crafted winning debates, negotiated designer deals and commanded attention of your student house chore chart. Each moment dragged, your eyes unsure where to stay as you grappled with your life. Was she going to tear you to shreds? Dismissing Ambessa so there were no witnesses to your murder? Or worse, was she going to outright admit that she despised you. 

“You fell in love,” It’s said in a hushed whisper, like gossip shared in a lecture hall. 

Your lip wobbled, the tsunami threatening to make itself known, as the plainness of the truth was said by the one person you’d wanted to tell. “Yeah, yeah I did,” 

She was on you in an instant, warm arms pulling you against her as you froze in place. 

“That was fucking dumb,” She huffed, her own voice watery, “Even dumber that you did it alone,” 

You gurgled in tears, laughter forced out as you looked at her incredulously. She was actually comforting you, as if this was normal. She was better than either you or Ambessa deserved and as she rocked you, you waited for the other shoe to smack you in the face.

“I hate you right now,” 

“Makes sense,” You sniffed, wanting to block the sound of those words out forever. 

“But right now doesn’t mean forever,” She huffs, trembling fingers taking your own, “Just need time to be furious, time to grieve I suppose,”

“I’ll give you whatever you need,” It was a babble now, “I’ll move out obviously and I c-can head home, you deserve a nice Christmas,” 

She looked at you like you’d grown a head, “No babe, none of that will be happening actually,”

“But,” 

“You have hurt me in an indescribable way,” Her voice was firm now, as if she were adult and you were child, “But I have decided I want you in my life despite that, and you are going to respect that even if you don’t understand it,” 

“I really, really don’t,” You squeaked, “But I’ll try, I want to earn your trust Mel, more than anything,”

“That’s good, because it’s Carol Concert Day and I would hate to sit next to Kino instead, he’s always so fidgety,” 

Fuck. Kino. Your face must have betrayed your panic. 

“Mum and I decided we won’t tell him, this,” She gestured between you and the space her mother had occupied, “died last night and therefore is irrelevant,” 

“Okay, whatever you want,” 

“It might also help things if you have a chat with Mum, actually talk about whatever’s happened,” 

“Easier said than done,” Your stomach twisted, “It’s a mess,”

“Try for me?”

Manipulative posh brat. You loved her. You’d do anything she asked, “FIne,” 

“I’m sorry you love her,” Mel said, gaze settling somewhat “It’s a shitty place to be,” 

You gave her the space she requested, finding the Matriarch supreme with Mina who was uncharacteristically quiet. 

“An olive branch?” You were actually holding out an olive flavoured breadstick, a hastily grabbed prop. You were staring down the barrel of a gun, unsure if it was loaded. Involuntary, awful Russian Roulette. 

She took it with a raised brow, offering you the chair you were already lowering yourself into, “How was that?”

Your rattling chest finally took in a full breath, “She wants to be my friend,” 

“You sound surprised,” 

“I am,” a cough, “and grateful and surprised I still have a head,”

“I was thinking much the same,” Mina crunched the end of the breadstick slyly, “Right, unacceptable,” she was flung off and it was as funny as always. God, you wished she was more awful somehow, make it easier. 

“And you? Seemed I missed a lot of the conversation,” 

Ambessa hummed, “I saw no point in lying to her, and this was regrettably a familiar conversation for us, it was better she learnt it from me, I am easier to be furious with,”

It felt stupidly chivalrous, like she’d done the heavy lifting so you could reap the rewards. Your assessment of how things would pan out had been so wrong you were half certain you were still in that room, looking through house listings. 

“Feels good to get it out?” You didn’t care about her answer, though you found you couldn’t not ask.

“Oh yes,” A snort, “It feels brilliant to be utterly degraded by your own child,” 

“You deserve it,” 

“I know,” Her tongue clicked, body tired.

“She wants us to patch it up,”

“Patch what up, the casual sex or the emotional turmoil?” 

“Don’t mock me,” Anger flared, dark and red. 

“I’m not,” A weathered sigh, “I respect my daughter enough to take this seriously, Darling,”

It was the worst thing she could have said. There was no respect for you, yet again. No desire to actually hear you, just a wish to please Mel. You were a middleman now to her, your feelings important if they impacted her child. 

“Well, we had a fun summer fling,” You were distant now, “It ended poorly for me, as usual for you I take it?”

She at least had the decency to wince at that, an almost disbelieving nod. 

“You tried to reignite something, I refused and then, like a fucking demon, you kissed me anyway,” 

“You kissed me back,” 

“So you said,” 

“Pushed me away too, well done,” 

“It was a test?” You wouldn’t have been shocked if she nodded. 

“That’s dramatic, even for me,” She licked her lips, “It was a lapse in judgement,” 

“Have a lot of those, do you?”

“Around you, yes,” It was lighthearted, eyes tempting as ever. This was not what patching it up meant, your tell tale heart shining through the safe’s cracks. 

“I think I hate you,” It was gentle, confused. 

“I have that effect on people, Sweet Girl,” 

You made an agreement to actually stick to the odd friendship you’d gained. Your priority was Mel. Her priority was Mel. A common goal that pushed you through the sticky residue of the remaining tension. 

Pushed you through that is. Ambessa Medarda, eyes fixed on your tentative smile, was firmly on the other side pondering something awful. She knew you were a problem. 

Kino returned, shaky and none the wiser, stumbling into the library. 

“There you are, Princess,” He called happily, “Glad to see you’re still alive after last night,”

Oh Kino. You don’t know the half of it, you idiot. “Thank Rictus, he held my hair back,” 

“He just took me on a boys breakfast,”

“A what?” You bit your cheek, your eyes meeting Ambessa’s bemused ones.

“I dunno,” He scratched his head, “Said he’d missed me, was really nice actually,”

You were nodding to compensate for the laughing rushing in you, she was doing the same.

“Fantastic!” You said in unison, as he pulled up a chair and crushed any remnants of your conversation. 

The rest of the day was smooth, surreal in its normalness. You were giving Mel space, but that wasn’t all that different to how you normally wandered about the place. The few presents you had managed to buy, now unpacked from your destroyed exit strategy, were placed under the tree and you got through a couple of hours of work before it was time to leave. 

Mel curled into you on the train, eyes fixed on the outside world rushing past though her thumb did its usual rhythmic strokes. The barriers your actions had placed sliced at you, bit by bit. Still she reached through them, cutting herself too, in an attempt to mend what you had broken. 

The Royal Albert Hall was picturesque, Christmas cheer infectious as you sat in your box. The view was unparalleled and yet they didn’t seem to fussed, messing about with the food and drink on offer. Fucking rich people. A little plate was handed to you by Ambessa, all your favourites plus things she thought you’d like to try. You nodded. It was actually normal, well your new normal. It made Mel smile, proof that you’d done as she asked. 

Carols in a place such as this were transcendent, wrapping you in comfort and applying balm to your battered mind. Kino and Mel were insistent on irritating each other, flicking at hair and chattering at each other before Ambessa smacked them both on the arm. You received a smile. You were the golden child, enjoying the music calmly whilst the others squibbled. 

Ambessa couldn’t keep her eyes off of you. You were much more interesting to watch. The music was known to her, but your reaction to it was a strange new delight. Stolen smiles she would hide behind sips of wine and hesitant coughs. She did respect Mel, loved her in a way that she had long since grappled with as all consuming, and yet she just could not look away. It made her stomach churn, each meeting of your gazes a zap of electricity to her chest. She was privileged to receive some of your quips, a calmness settled over you in the aftermath of destruction and you had taken to the changes like a duck to water. She didn’t know whether to be awed or worried, so she settled for the pulsing, confusing beat in the middle. 

You and Mel spoke quietly on the train home, some fibres knitting back together as Kino attempted to argue with his mother about why Die Hard was a Christmas film. She was showing you some furniture she wanted to buy for your house and it was domestic and safe and only slightly off. You hated the armchair and you knew that she knew that. 

“Looks great,” You lied meekly, “Love the colours,” 

“Thought you would,” She smirked, “I’ll order it now then, and the matching blanket,” 

“Awesome,” 

She started to laugh,”Are you just my bitch now?”

“I can cope with an ugly chair,”

“And cope you shall,” She showed you the delivery confirmation, phone pushed forward proudly. 

Bugger. You’d hoped she was bluffing to fuck with you. Your slow grimace made her laughter louder, and you flicked her with the lid of your Diet Coke bottle. 

Christmas Eve had arrived. 

It was a day filled with energy, board games and gingerbread houses. You learnt you were shit at biscuit engineering, unable to keep two walls standing let alone a whole house. Rictus had rescued you, the Medardas too caught in their own projects. With a steady hand he assembled the gingerbread flat pack and laid the piping foundations for your chocolate buttons and sprinkles. Yours looking shit would have been funny, if it weren’t for the masterpieces before you. 

Ambessa felt that odd buzz again, eyes raking over your shaky hands as you tried to pipe icing, or reposition walls. You seemed to naturally excel at everything she had seen, so watching you fail was almost cute. Your frustration took over your face, eyebrows scrunched with an open, wincing mouth. 

“Now, what the hell?” 

Kino snorted, adding the final touches to his stained glass windows, “I don’t think art is your calling, Princess,” 

“Or architecture,” Ambessa added with a smile.

“I think it’s good babe,” Mel said, squeezing your shoulder, “In the same way a five year old’s would be I guess,” 

“Rictus?” You said hopefully. 

“You can’t ask for my opinion, I did most of it,” He snorted, fixing a window pane across the room. 

Your gingerbread house was sacrificed to be eaten, the others deemed too sacred. It did at least taste good, Kino had said. You’d then bitten him on the arm, suggesting it would be a miracle if he tasted better than he looked. You were separated, Mina placed between you like a barrier. 

As the hours grew later, you drank your tea and prepared for bed. You were promptly stopped at the stairs. 

“We haven’t prepared for Christmas, into the living room,” Ambessa gripped your arm, pushing you into the space. 

Mel and Kino stood, wide smiles on their faces, organising a little plate. 

It had mince pies, a cookie and a glass of milk on it. 

“What are you doing?” It slipped out incredulously. 

“If we don’t do this, Mum doesn’t give us our presents,” Mel said.

“I don’t give you anything, Children,” Ambessa said, outraged, “That’s his job,” 

“Where’s the thimble of port?”

Kino placed down a large wine glass, rolling his eyes, “Father Christmas prefers a full glass apparently,” 

“Yes he does,” Ambessa smirked, before turning to you, “And can pop down the reindeer’s carrots,”

You looked at her, disbelieving eyes boring into her gleaming irises, “Why would they need carrots? I’m sure they’ve had enough already,”

Her eyes darkened, “They have a long evening ahead of them, do you want them to get exhausted halfway through? What if every house thought as ridiculously as you? What if they’re running on empty?”

You barked a shocked laugh. Of all people, Ambessa Medarda was not someone you anticipated continuing this tradition into her children’s adulthood. Grabbing some carrots, you left them next to Mel’s plate. 

“Happy?” You gestured grandly. 

“I’m sure Rudolph will be overjoyed, Dear,” She walked over kissing you each on the forehead, with a tenderness that startled you, “Now, off to bed little wolves or he shall leave you with an empty tree,” 

The tree already had presents underneath it, placed by the three of you. You hadn’t consciously clocked the lack of hers. 

You felt fuzzy, overwhelmed by Christmas and the first tendrils of contentment that had been unburdened by your lies. A long road lay ahead, but if Mel’s conspiratory giggle as she grabbed the open port bottle and tugged you to her room was anything to go by, you were going to make it out the other side. 

“Hey,” Mel said, passing the port back to you to finish, “What’s the time?”

You grabbed your phone, arms wobbly with intoxication. 

12:02am

“Merry Christmas!”

[ecargmura]

Dandadan Episode 7 Review - A Mother's Love

If Episode 4 hasn’t put Science Saru on the map for high quality animation, then this episode surely did. I haven’t read the source material, but even as an anime-only watcher, I can definitely see the love and passion the studio puts into this. It’s crazy how a Japanese anime studio owned by a Korean person can make such invigorating quality.

The rest of the fight with Acrobatic Silky was animated well. I love how the kids outwitted her by running away just so her hair gets caught in the nook and cranny of the warehouse. Okarun manages to defeat her by going full throttle. However, their victory isn’t a happy one as devouring Aira caused her to die. Turbo Granny explained that since she’s an ordinary person, being devoured by a spirit would easily kill someone. I sort of like that detail, honestly. There’s no anime logic about how she could survive this. She’s dead and that is what the rest of the episode is about. 

What I also like is that seeing her dead easily causes Momo and Okarun to start doing what they can like telling Turbo Granny to call the ambulance and for Momo to resuscitate her using her psychic hands. Though, it does feel odd that a group of teenagers know how to resuscitate someone so skillfully, even if it’s an attempt. They’re both not doctors and are on the opposite spectrum of them. The only way she can be saved is having Acrobatic Silky connect her aura to Aira’s like connecting two cords together.

That’s where the highlight of the episode comes in the form of Silky’s tragic backstory. Man, it broke my heart seeing Silky’s life before her unfortunate end. She was a single mother working as a prostitute alongside several jobs in order to provide for her and her beloved daughter who was her entire world and her purpose for living. Her daughter was sweet in that she was essentially her light in her life. She worked hard in order to buy the red dress that eventually becomes what she wears as a ghost and she was also teaching her daughter ballet. The tragedy comes from debt collectors or mobsters coming in to assault her and then they later took her daughter away, which is severely tragic because the sequences of her life before the tragedy shows that her daughter just celebrated her fifth birthday. If the mobsters are related to trafficking, this means that her daughter’s fate became that of a trafficked child and that’s horrendous in itself. Also, props to Hina Kino for voicing the daughter. She's excellent at creating a child-like voice, especially with how she wailed.

Silky’s dance sequence before meeting her end was seriously beautiful, yet so tragic. The scenery with the starry night was gorgeous but Silky starts dancing. Ballet is an elegant, graceful and poised style of dancing and that’s how she decided to meet her end. The way it was animated was so gorgeous. Also, if you noticed, Silky’s dancing was used in the full music video of Dandadan’s opening song.

There are some people out there wondering if Silky’s daughter is Aira. She’s not. When Silky became a ghost, she could only stand listlessly until little Aira came and mistook her for her recently deceased mother. Realizing that she had a daughter, Silky latched onto Aira and decided to protect her until it became obsessive and psychotic. 

This sequence also showcases why Aira behaved the way she did earlier. She’s a narcissist primarily because of what her father had said about her needing to become stronger in order to let her mother be proud of her once she sees her again. That was why she developed a high self-confidence in order to one day show her late mother. She may have been insufferable before but the memories have completely humbled her. The way she hugged Silky just so she could have solace and not be forgotten in death was such a powerful scene. This shows that underneath her pompous attitude, Aira had a kind heart. My opinion of her instantly changed after this. Wow. I legit shed some tears.

I wonder if Dandadan’s story is just encountering a ghost or an alien and learning of their stories or what not. There doesn’t seem to be an overall grand scheme of things. I like that honestly. It’s just a story about kids encountering the supernatural and learning a lot of life lessons amidst the craziness. Please correct me if I’m wrong. Anyways, what are your thoughts about this episode?

[fallenrocket]

Normally, I don’t like it when a protagonist is dropped into a new situation and immediately starts taking over. You know the type--they know better, do better, and don't listen to the naysayers who've been banging their heads against the wall all this time. It really annoys me.

But with Cassian Andor, he's somehow able to come in and shake things up in a way that genuinely works. On both Aldhani and Narkina 5, he arrives and quickly becomes indispensable.

On the Aldhani mission, Cassian really does know better in some respects--that's part of the point. He's thrown into a group of rebels with a lot of dedication and certain skills but not a wealth of experience, and his practical knowledge is crucial. Whether it's small details, like how to arrange themselves when posing as Imperial troops, or critical skills, like piloting the freighter to make their escape, he becomes a vital member of the team. However, he doesn't steamroll over everything the others do, and he acknowledges when their ideas/plans are strong, like timing the mission so they can use the Eye as cover.

(It also helps that, at this point, Cassian is more invested in his own survival than in the mission itself. When he puts his foot down and insists on piloting the freighter himself, it's not because he automatically thinks he's the best; it's because he's the only one with experience flying a craft like that, and he feels most comfortable putting his life in his hands rather than someone else's.)

Then there's Narkina 5. Again, Cassian doesn't charge in with a “shut up and listen to me” attitude, instantly superior to people who’ve been there much longer. Instead, he collaborates. It's not "Cassian Andor's prison escape plan"--it's an effort by a number of people, and he just does everything he can to help flesh it out and refine it.

So much of Narkina 5's structure is designed to divide the inmates, ensuring that they won't band together by instead pitting them against each other. The least productive table gets fried every single shift--someone's success is always someone else's loss. But Cassian forms relationships. At his work table, he’s a natural leader, doing extra work to help Ulaf and giving Taga the credit for a good idea. He shares observations and plans with inmates from other tables, and he never gives up on getting Kino to join their side--no matter how many times Kino tells him to get his mind off escape, he repeats, "How many guards on each level?" He rejects the Empire’s divisions and is working hard to help everyone, not just himself.

The strongest example of this comes in "One Way Out," when Cassian urges Kino to be the one to address the prisoners. He doesn't have to be the one in charge, out front. He doesn't have to be The Leader in order to lead. When something matters to him, he'll gladly work to make it happen, largely behind the scenes and without much credit, giving others the inspiration they need to step up.

If the balance had tipped just a little too far to the other side, Cassian could've been caught up in a trope that irritates me. But as it's written and performed, this quality is one of my favorite things about him. The Rebellion is going to be so lucky to have him.