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aliceinborderlandsquidgame · 8 days ago

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Kitten | The Salesman x Fem!Reader

Summary: Something about you catchs his eyes. Now he wants you all for himself.

Warnings: Obsess!Salesman - Canon violence - Suggestive - Manipulation - Reader loves cats - Maybe OOC - Kind of pet play - E/C = eye color - Reader gets called Kitten -

Another morning, another day ahead, names to meet and recruit, a speech that was deep in his mind.

His movements were calculated, robotic, his smile a fake one, to hide the disgust he felt towards the peopel he had to met.

The last hour, the last train and last name. Your name. The Salesman did his usual thing while waiting for you to appear, get himself a coffee from a cheap machine and let his mind wonder.

Even if he had read your file in order to have the upper hand in the exchange, he was curious to see how you truly were, how would you react to his approach, what would you say or do once he told you about the game.

Maybe the work of the day was getting him, his eyes did let (only for the observant ones) that he was tired to not degree.

One more, one more worm and I can go home.

The train came, lots of faces walked pass him, he only wanted to find yours and put an end to his day.

Finally He saw you, you were looking at your phone, smiling? Well he guessed even someone in your situation could smile.

Maybe you got a lover back home.

He saw how you took a seat, most likely to rest after a long day at your underpaid work, that did not cover any of the debts you had. Yet you did not look discouraged or sad, you were rather animated by what your body language gave out.

Feets moving side to side like a song was playing only for you. That smile and a spark in your eyes...

How dumb yet cute.

Still, he needed to end the day and your name was the last one. So there he went, moving with confidence till he took a seat besides you, his trusted briefcase close.

"Miss.." He tried to get your attention but nothing, you were too deep in your phone writing something. He dared to take a look.

What in-

Cats. Multiple pictures of cats. Different colors, shapes and ages.

It was not the most strange thing he had seen from someones phone but still...

A new photo came in, it was a cat, rather slim with one leg missing but it seemed full of life.

"Im glad you are fine" He hear your whisper thanks to the sitation now out of peopel and that even if you whispered it was rather loud. Most likely you had no sense of self preservation or did check your surroundings since he was able to basically see your phone screen and your messages for...four minutes?

Yes, defently too much for the little patience he had, he wanted to end his day now.

"Excusme Miss" He tried again this time louder and it did finally caught your attention.

You turned to him, too lost checking your cats and how they were doing so far. You never noticed the man besides you. He was tall, black hair and wearing a suit. You could tell it was a rather expensive one, at his feets was a briefcase.

Ah Salesman, he must sells life saves or something.

"Sorry Sir, im in no position to buy anything" You said looking at his dark eyes and bowing then you went back to check your phone.

Well someone ignoring him was not a first.

"Miss, im not here to sell you anything" He started getting your attention back with a rather funny and confused look on your face. "Im here to ask you to play a game with me"

"...A game?" You asked not really beliving your ears. What man would ask a stranger to play a game with them at 11 p.m. in a subway station?

Was this a scam ? A trap maybe ?

Ah, the confusion, he was used to get that too and could only give you a polite fake smile back.

"Yes a game, a game of ddakji" He clarifited pulling from his suit pocket two papper pieces, one blue and other red. "If you manage to win I will give you ₩100.000" He recite just as he always did.

Your eyes opened a bit after that information, while it would not help you that much it would be free money...you could get a warm dinner, something that your current situation did not let you do.

But, there was not a thing as simple as free money, right ? There must be a catch.

"And what would happen if I lose?" You asked him, the hesitation in your voice was clear for The Salesman who just smiled again.

"If you lose, you pay me back ₩100,00. But I doubt you will lose in a childs game" He added trying to incite you to engage in the game.

He studied your face, you were thinking about it, temped by it. Even if the money was not enough, the chance was all it needed to start a chain of thoughts in your mind and finally accept.

And while you were indeed thinking a ring from your phone took your attention away, a new message a new cat pic.

Right, I cant do this. You thought.

"Sorry Sir I must refuse" You started giving him a bow "Even if my chances of winning were high, Im not in position to give you ₩100,000 if I lose. It would not be fair to you" You smiled at him thinking all of this was ending.

He blinked a bit taken back, not because you refused, he had deal with that before, but what you said.

Fair.

The world was not fair. The information in your file let that clear, it was obvious that you knew it.

Then why not take advantage of this? Even If he was just giving you the illusion of money, why not try ? And more, why be worried over whats fair ?

"May I ask why you cant play with me?" He finally said, pulling the pappers back inside his suit pocket. "Its not a big amount of money and I would not make fun of you if you lose"

He was trying for you to feel safe, maybe you were nervous he would judge you ? He knew he could be quiet intimidating

"Oh! Well its rather...embarrassing" You responded, nervously biting your lower lip then looking at the ground.

The Salesman's eyes lingered over your lips, the way you just bite them. Maybe he was getting tired but something from that action just called him, made his body react.

"It cant be that bad" He tried again, trying to sound gentle

"Well, im in debt because my ex-boyfriend ran away with the money for the Cat Shelter we had together, took away all my savings and I ended in debt cause of it" Your tone did let him know you were angry, sad, frustrated and ashamed.

Well, he did know. But hearing out loud did make it sound funnier he could not lie to himself.

But seeing your face now, that sad look and how you had looked so happy earlier at the cat pics (probably some cats you managed to save and find a home before all things went wrong). It made him feel bad for you, something he never felt towards anyone in his line of work.

"Mhm so your ex-boyfriend ran away and then you kept the shelter by yourself?"

He cant lie, it was a cute reason.

But stupid no less.

"I did, we had too many cats and all of them were sick. They needed someone, I could not ignore them" You tried to explain, a sad smile now on your face as you remember the old promises and memories.

And look where that took you.

"I dont hope that you get it, most peopel laughts when I tell them. Even the load sharks had got a good one" You said pulling out your phone and looking at something while the Salesman let his mind wonder.

You were right. He did not get it. It was something he would never do, an act so compassionate towards a creature...it was not in his nature.

"Look, this is Fat Luigi" He hear you said as you showed him your phone with the image of a big fluffy black cat. "When we first got him he was underwheight, most vets told us he would not make it. It was hard, I passed many nights awake taking care of him, and spent lots of money on him. But now seeing him healthy and happy, it just makes it worth it"

"But are you happy right now? Arent you afraid of your debts?" He asked, curious to know how your brain was working under the stress you most likely had.

"Happy...., well I cant say I love my life right now, I work long hours and the job its bad, I have load sharks on my back and the place where the shelter is will most likely be destroyed since I cant pay..."

He nodded listening to you.

"But im not sad. Yes the situation sucks but when i see the cats i managed to help...honestly even if it sounds crazy, I would do it again" You ended giving him a tired yet honest smile. One that made his heart beat a bit faster.

For a few moments he did not say a thing, his mind wondering, he was not sure what, something about you made him feel slighty different.

Maybe it was your wish to help ? Even when you had passed and suffered ? How you still wanted to play fair ?

You two were different in many ways.

"You would?" He asked seeing you nodd without thinking "And tell me, do I look like a cat person ? Would you get me one if you still had your shelter ?" He continued now trying to entertain himself.

You defenetly were not made for the games.

"Well, you do give the energy of a cat person" By the look on his face he was amused "I mean, you seem like you pass many hours outside your home, cats do need their humans but they can work fine alone for a few hours, you would need to pet them for a bit once you get back"

"Oh I see, and what more?" He leaned in closer, his elbow resting on his knee, one hand holding his face as he turned himself to you invading your personal space.

"You seem like someone who will prefer company thats not always over them demanding attention and cats often give you that, well depends on the cat" You explained blushing at his proximity.

"Then, dont you think it would be better for me to get a kitten?"

"They can be handfull-"

"Mhm, I would need a submissive one" He said leaning even closer, you could now see his dark eyes and smell his cologne. "One that will wait for me at home and will...please me when I want it and how I want it"

His hand went towards your face slowly touching your cheeck with his knuckles, it made you blush even more and be more aware of him. Something was telling you that this was dangerous, this man who had approach you, and yet you could not get yourself to move.

"Maybe a kitten with (E/C), a bit dumb, stupid, has no sense of self preservation, needs help to do anything. But" He paused his eyes studying your face "But its also cute, on its way"

You did not respond. Mouth dry, your mind worked around his cryptid words. Was him...insinuating something?

"How big its your debt?" He asked keeping the small distance.

"Too big" you responded your voice letting out how nervous you were. It was a miracle you managed to get these words out.

He smirked, he knew the exact number and also, he loved knowing he was the one causing you to feel nervous, maybe you were scared?

The idea that he could be scaring you excited him.

"Tell you what, I will pay your debt" He saw the suprise in your face and disbelief was impossible to hide "But, you must pay me back" He added moving his hand, his thumb now over your lower lip. "You can pay me with your body, I said I should get a kitten right? I believe you are perfect for that position. All you will have to do.." He trailed off forcing his thumb inside your mouth "Its obey me, when I tell you to do something I expect you to obey. If you dont behave, well lets say I can be very creative with my punishments"

He could see the terror in your eyes but also the combination of hope and arousment.

Sick cute thing, just what he needed

"Mhm, lets give it a try shall we? Suck my thumb like a good kitten, I want to see how well you can obey"

Timidly under his dark stare and big pupils your tongue touched his thumb, a shiver went down his spine as he felt it. Your wet tongue licking his finger trying to give it as much attention as you could.

The Salesman moved it around your tongue, almost groaning when he saw you close your eyes and use one hand to take his arm, like you were grounding yourself. He felt a bulge starting to form and couldn't wait to see how wet you were getting.

Abruptly he took off his finger from your mouth taking your neck and kissing you, it was demanding and not loving. He sucked on your lower lip till you moaned and he used this chance to push his tongue into you, caressing yours and sucking it. Needing to hear you moan one more time for him.

What came first were the sounds of steps, The Salesman separated, breathing hard, just like you. Your face was red and eyes wide open and also full with lust. He moved his hair giving you a twisted smile getting up and taking your hand.

"W-wait were are we going?" You asked at him confused by all of the exchange, "Will you really pay my debt?"

"Oh I will my kitten, you will have your loved shelter back and will be able to rescue all the dam cats in Seoul" He said opening the bathroom of the sitation checking that it was empy.

"But first, I need you to take care of something" He said pointing at the bulge between his legs.

He did not miss how you licked your lips.

"Dont worry, I will get you a collar later, now. Get on your knees and show me just how well you can suck, kitten"

#squid game imagine #squid game x reader #squid game x y/n #the salesman x reader #the Salesman

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musical-chick-13 · 2 years ago

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Fucking hell, people are so goddamn boring.

#'wah I'm spiteful toward a fictional construct because I believe fiction is directly tied and identical to real world morality'#with all due respect grow up #like. yeah okay fine. you shouldn't be beholden to other people's opinions and your self-esteem and happiness shouldn't depend on them #but I don't think we talk enough about how TIRED this shit makes you. to be told over and over again (implicitly or explicitly)#that this thing that means a lot to you and genuinely improved your life and you as a person and brought you peace #is just. no-nuance Evil™ or a reflection on your character and/or has no artistically redeeming qualities of any kind at all #like newsflash people disparaging or making fun of or vitriolically and openly hating on the thing you love over and over again is going to #get to you!! that's just. a side effect of being alive???#you can be the most confident and well-adjusted person on the planet and that's still going to be at least a little discouraging #it is in human nature to want to share our interests and talk about them and find other people who feel this way about them #when you literally cannot find that because people keep denying you that over and over and over again like yeah. it's going to #get annoying and you're gonna get a little sad and frustrated about it

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thebestsetter · 25 days ago

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Oliver Aiku can have any girl he wants. Anytime he wants.

He has always been a charmer. He's used to getting all the ladies he wants, anytime he wants. It comes naturally to him, really. His looks, charm, and charisma have all led to his fame with the "female population," as he calls it.

So, when you started dating him, everybody warned you. Your mom, dad, friends, and even your annoying sibling. He has a bad reputation, they said. And it was true. He was known to appear on the news with a new sidepiece every week. From random girls to models to athletes, he can have them all. And he breaks up with them all (and leave them heartbroken, too)

That's why you weren't really surprised. Of course, you were hurt, but you kind of already expected it to happen, even if that makes you a bad girlfriend. You have been dating for only 9 months, after all. He would get bored of you eventually. Well, it was good while it lasted. You were totally okay with it. Really.

At least that was what you tried to show everybody. But you can't fool your heart.

It was clear the break-up had taken a toll on you. You really, really liked him. You really thought you could change him. Pathetic. Stupid. You were so, so stupid. Men don't change. Especially cheaters. Once a cheater, always a cheater, they say. You should have listened.

When nobody was close, you always broke down crying. Everything reminded you of him. From the silly plushie he gave you on your arcade date to his toothbrush on your sink that you, for some reason, could not get rid of to, of course, those 100 calls he gave you everyday from unknown numbers, even if you had already blocked him everywhere you could.

This was your reality for the first 2 months after the break-up. You felt discouraged to do anything besides lying on the couch all day and surviving off of noodles and ice cream. You were terrible.

But everything ends, eventually. Be it a good thing or a bad one. In this case, you were glad it ended.

After much help from your friends and family, you were starting to feel like yourself again. The world was no longer grey and sad. Life had gotten better. You had gotten better. Everything was going perfectly.

Until it wasn't. Until your ex-boyfriend showed up at your doorstep at exactly 2:41 a.m., drunk and babbling nonsense and asking - no, pleading - to be taken back.

What you didn't know was that Aiku had a completely opposite experience after your break-up.

At first, he didn't make a big deal out of it. He was actually a little relieved - what had gotten over him to have stayed so long in the same relationship? For most people, 9 months is little time. For Oliver Aiku, it was an eternity. Most of his relationships lasted less than a month. He couldn't help it. Most girls bore him. He has to break up with them.

After the initial phase of calling you and being left on voicemail lots of times, he figured you wouldn't give him another chance. And he had no reason to plead for one. He was Oliver Aiku, for God's sake! He can have any girl he wants. Anytime he wants.

He began partying again. He had stopped partying when he was in a relationship with you. And, man, did he miss it.

Kissing faceless strangers, going to bed with girls he didn't even know the name of, appearing on the news every week with a new girl.

Old Oliver Aiku was back. The one from before he met you.

This was his reality for about 2 months after your breakup. It felt like sugar rush, like being high on drugs or something (even if he never did - and would never do - any drugs). It felt good. Life without you was good.

But everything ends, eventually. Be it a good thing or a bad one. In this case, he was sad they did.

Suddenly, everything reminded him of you. Your skincare products on the sink, that he had already used to the very end for some reason and yet couldn't find anywhere that sold them (he was almost buying it off the internet), the stupid polaroid of you two on the back of his clear phone case (he swore he had thrown it away when you two broke up), a book you were reading and accidentally left it at his home (he made a mental note to give it back to you someday. Maybe even ask you if he could borrow it. He already read it twice, actually, but he just wanted reasons to see you again).

Life suddenly felt dull. He had no one waiting for him at home, no one to make him dinner, no one to cuddle with, no one to make him watch stupid rom-coms.

Those other girls were just so boring. They didn't treat him like you did. They weren't you. But he was scared to admit that he missed you more than he let on.

Life with you was supposed to be good. Until it wasn't.

Until one fateful day, he drank too much. He downed beer after beer after beer. He was more than tipsy - he was utterly intoxicated.

His feet carried him to your house almost immediately. It was as if he was on autopilot, his brain finally acknowledging what only his heart did: he missed you. And it hurt.

That's how you both find yourself in this situation.

You, on one hand, were kinda disgusted. He was drooling, clearly out of his mind, drunk as hell, and looking really sad. It almost made you feel bad fir the guy.

On the other, you were absolutely delighted. Satisfied, even. He was hurting, too, just like you did. He missed you. He was begging to be taken back. You almost couldn't stop the smirk appearing on your face.

Aiku was looking pathetic. On his knees, hugging your legs and apologizing for all he did. For everything. For cheating, for hurting you, for making you feel like shit. He wanted - no, he needed you back on his life.

He held you like you were everything, and in that moment, you really were. You have always been his everything. He just couldn't acknowledge it before. He was blinded by lust. But now he was righting his wrongs and trying to be a part of your life again. He was not going to hurt you again.

He was everything you didn't want to see anymore. He have always been what you despised in a man, you just couldn't see it before. You were blinded by love. But now, you were righting your wrongs, and you wouldn't let him back on your life again. You were not going to let him hurt you again.

You yelled at him. Called him names so bad he doesn"t even want to remember. And when he pleaded again, you closed the door.

Not even the bangs on your door would make you open it. You didn't want to see him anymore. You were officially over the man who caused you so much pain. And it felt good. Life without Oliver Aiku felt good.

Banging at your door, Aiku felt stupid. He felt sad. He felt disgusted at himself for doing what he did to you. He felt sick.

He was stupid. So, so stupid for throwing away a girl like you.

Oliver Aiku could have any girl he wants. Anytime he wants.

But he didn't want any girl at any time. He wanted you, his girl, right now.

Masterlist

#blue lock #bllk #bllk manga #blue lock x reader #bllk x reader #bllk x you #blue lock x you #oliver aiku x you #the oliver brainrot is too strong 💔#oliver aiku x reader #bllk aiku #blue lock aiku #oliver aiku #aiku x reader #aiku oliver #bllk angst #blue lock angst

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thedivinetarot · 4 months ago

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Put your white tennis shoes on and follow me, why work so hard when can just be free

How do you lure people in?

☆ How to chose the perfect pile for you?

1) Close your eyes.

2) Clear your mind.

3) Take a deep breathe.

4) Ask the question in your head. Open your eyes and the picture that you are drawn to the most is your pile.

☆ Note:

- This is a general reading, so please take what resonates and leave what doesn't.

- I usually do an energy check for each pile so that the reading can resonates as much as possible.

- This reading is kind of long. Since it is divided into 4 sections. And each section shows a question including the energy check.

Take care ❤

Arya

1) How do you view yourself?

2) How do you lure people in?

3) How do you lure your romantic interest in?

Pile 1 - Under the moonlight

Your current energy

Well, in this pile I see that there's two energies. The first one is that there's a person in your life who is interested in you romantically. He might have scorpio placements or water placements (Cancer, Scorpio and pisces). I see that you are not seeing clearly the situation which is making you feel stuck and stagnant. I see that the other case here is that there's a person in your life or will enter soon who have the placements I mentioned above. At first, you are not going to trust him because you had your fair share of heartbreak. I see that you are going or you are doubting his feelings for you. I see that you think that there's a heartbreak after all this happiness and genuine feelings which is so sad honestly. What I see from the cards is that this person have a very stable feelings for you. But he is either too cold to express them or he have an avoidant attachment style. I see that this person's intentions towards you are very genuine. He want to be in a platonic relationship with you. He want to protect you and support you. I don't honestly see anything harmful coming from that person. The only thing that might sabotage this relationship is you pile 1. I think you are too afraid to be vulnerable and open up to them which keeping you stuck and away from love and happiness. You fear the heartbreak even though that person have literally your best interest at heart. Okay, another energy I'm picking up on is that this pile are working on a project and I literally feel like my mid to lower back is hurting me so bad. Maybe you are putting too much pressure on your physical body which is leading you to feel this way. Or metaphorically; you may be having a lot of assignments and projects for your college/ school or work which is keeping you restless and tired. I see that you are working with a group of people but the main focus is on you idk why. Also I feel like you are working out in a very harsh way which is giving you this pain your back pile 1. Some people here feel pain in their hips and pelvis area too. I literally feel that on my body. Try to rest, drink some herbal tea, read a book and disconnect from the internet. Go out for a walk under the sun (Idk if you live in cold or warm climate but anyways 🥲). Now let's get into the reading.

1- How do you view yourself?

So, this pile see themselves as people who lack foresight and decisiveness. I see that you guys are aware of your own potential but due to laziness and being discouraged by your life circumstances you chose to leave the battle without even trying to fight back. I see that you chose to surrender to whatever life have offered you. You could be a new school graduate who doesn't want to go to college due to your financial state. I see that also this pile are quite mature emotionally. You are a bit nostalgic to your childhood and how things were safe. I see also that you are for whatever reason; you think that your life will change like magic. I will explain to you. You see those movies where the girl lives her WHOLE life thinking she is an ordinary person but then someone tells her that she is a decent queen or princess and her life turn around 180°?(princess diaries movie is a reference here) I feel like this pile want change so bad but at some point you gave up to try and change anything. Like you lost your passion to live or even that your life will improve. I see that you are someone who is very artistic, someone who is very spiritual too. You like traveling, you like learning about different cultures. You like to educate yourself instead of scrolling endlessly on IG or tiktok. But I see that there's still hope for you. Also, what I'm seeing that this pile are quite innocent and if not then you are someone who always feel this sense of nostalgia. You feel nostalgic to people, to places, you always have something to reminisce over. Another thing I'm picking up on is that people in this group are quite motherly. They like taking care of people especially young children. You like setting with them, you like how sweet they are. You might tell yourself that you want to become a mother one day. Some people here view themselves as a gate to heaven. How so? Like you see this person who enters your life and their life change for better? I'm picking up on people with esfj, enfj, infj, isfj, estj mbti. Someone who changes people, who fix them. Who can show them the great future that await them if they change. Pile 1 you see yourself as a catalyst to change.

2-How do you lure people in?

First thing I'm picking up on is that this pile appear stable in front of people. You look put together and elegant. I see that even if you do not wear the best clothes you have people still think that what you are wearing is expensive. I see also that you appear quite heartbroken, there's this melancholic aura around you. Another thing is this pile are quite mysterious by nature. You do not overshare yourself and you keep people thirsty for more. You appear also quite faint? You see those people who are enigmatic? Their hair color is very high in contrast with their skin. There's this aura of mystery around you, which make many people wonder. "Who is she/he?" I am seeing that you are quite magnificent. In the previous paragraph I typed that you view yourself and someone who is innocent and sweet, people also view you like that pile one. They view you as someone who is lovely to be with, especially new friends or people who want to be your friend. They get so excited and happy when you are around. Also, I see that people view you as someone with many potential. You literally know that and you see it in yourself. You know that you have so much potential in you. People in your company feel in awe honestly. You make people also aware of thir beauty and potential. You see beauty everywhere you go. People also see that your views and opinions on the world are quite interesting. You see things in different light and you make people see what they was not able to see before. You appear as a lone wolf to people. You are always alone in public enjoying a drink or walking. You presence is so liked by others. I see beauty and brains yo you could be someone who is blessed by beauty and also smart soo (lucky you pile 1).

3- How do you lure your romantic interest in?

People who are romantically interested in you see that you have many options. That's why they do not dare to make a move on you. I see that many People crush on you but they fear coming in out of rejection. They fear getting rejected by you pile 1. Also I see that you appear as someone who is content on their own and you do not really want someone out of neediness. You want them because you like them That's why. I see that, you might have stalkers. People in this pile might have got stalked online or physically. I see that because of your mysterious aura People really get curious about you. I see that this pile attracts older men. Like if you are in your 20s you might notice that men who are in their 40s and 50s are attracted to you. And if you are a guy reading this then women really get intrigued by you, especially if they are older. I also see that you always have an option but you chose to stay alone because you think that working on yourself or studying is what really matters. I see that romantic interests tend to view you as someone who is out of their league, someone very nurturing. They may call you wife material and they are right! You are loyal and honest. I see also that you attract older men. Because they are more authoritative and more wealthy that people your age and a little younger/older. Some people in this pile like the baby/daddy dynamic, Idk why but I keep hearing "every man gets his wish and 1949 by Lana Del Rey" go listen to them if you want to. There's a lot of references on the cards on sugar baby/ daddy relationship. Honey, if you want an older man/woman or a sugar daddy/mommy you can easily attract one and believe me you can literally make them your slave. I see that your romantic interest value you because you are not afraid of walking away from things that do not serve you. I see that the love relationship that you are seeking and imagining in your head is meant for you in this lifetime. And you are going to get them no matter how old you get.

4- Placements for this pile

Fire placements (Aries, Sagittarius and leo). Earth placements (Taurus, Capricorn and virgo). Aquarius, Cancer, Venus in scorpio. Pluto with aspects to the ascendant. Mars, jupiter, Uranus, Mercury, neptune dominant.

Pile 2- A cross the shore

Your current energy

Okay, I see this pile feels disappointed because of a man in your life? He could either be your father or someone you are with in a relationship. I see that this man is sabotaging your happiness. You could be so happy and satisfied and then you set with him and your mode change 180° for the worst. I see that also if you are a woman you might be a gemini and this man is so cocky that he make you feel anxious and out of element. Another thing I'm picking up on is that this pile are trying to juggle many responsibilities but due to stress and anxiety you are just postponing your priorities until you get the mind clarity that you are looking for. And if not that case is applicable to your case then I see that you are someone who is very structured or organized and there's many responsibilities on your shoulders right now but due to stress and exhaustion you are just surrendering to life? I see that you need some time for yourself pile 2, try to reflect and take a break. If you have many responsibilities then break the task into small baby steps so you can complete it; also try to take a break between each task. Pile 2 your spirit team is telling you that the worst have finally ended and they want you to know that whatever thing you wish for you'll get it. I see that they are encouraging you to get out and be more social and be optimistic. They hate seeing you sad and anxious. They want you to know that they love you and they are working day and night to insure that you are safe and sound. Idk why I started tearing up I feel suddenly a wave of warm emotions, I also feel so tired and sleepy pile 2 if you want to sleep please go and sleep everything will be alright. They are telling me that the clarity you want will come to you quickly and you don't have to work for it. You only need to set still and listen to the synchronicity they are sending you. Each one of those synchronicities have something to do with what you want to know. God bless you pile 2.

1- How do you view yourself?

I see that you view yourself as someone who is very spiritual. A priestess, I'm seeing. You like to dive deep into the unknown, you have this thirst for dark knowledge like occult, witchcraft, tarot, astrology, alchemy and other forms of divination. I see that you see yourself as someone who embody the pluto archetype. Someone who is in a constant inner change, you could be now having your first or second spiritual awakening which is kinda harsh in your lens. I see that you are someone who is very patient and stubborn. Someone who can reach whatever they want. I see also that you see yourself as someone who is scattered brain and your head is always in the clouds. You could be a dreamer too. I'm seeing that you are someone who is trying their best but you feel like the best thing is nothing important to anyone. I feel like you might see yourself as someone who is an outcast? Someone who is overlooked by others. People don't really take you seriously and they think that you are dumb? (I'm not saying you are dumb neither people around you, it is your perception to things pile 2). I see that you see yourself as someone who is mentally ill, someone who is overlooked by people from their own gender. You might have dealt with girls/girl friends who used you for what you have like money/service or attention and then they ditched you when their business has done. I see that you might be so attached to your female caregiver so much it could be your mother or grandmother or old sister for some of you. Put I'm seeing that this caregiver is old like in their 40s. This pile has a really melancholic perspective of who they are it is like someone who is lost. I see that unlike pile 1, you use your intuition a lot or you started listening to your intuition in order for you to survive. You might have given a lot of people lots of second chances but they played you again until you literally got drained and depleted of energy. So, as a coping mechanism you chose to stay by yourself so you can protect your inner peace. I see you may call yourself a freak in a proud way. Like you see those people who got treated horribly because of their personalities but then they accepted the fact that it is what it is and they started calling themselves of what people called them proudly? You might be like this.

2- How do you lure people in?

Well, pile 2. I see that you act distant and aloof in front of people but once you warm up to someone you can be really helpful. I see that at first people see that you are starting fresh and new in your life (because of your spiritual awakening) they see how mentally and perhaps physically you are changing. I see that you try to do your best to keep your life together, people can see that you are trying but what make them sad is you do not ask for help. You do not want anyone to help you. You think that no one cares but in fact people care more than you think. I see what really make those people stay away from you is that you do not give them a chance to reveal themselves. You might be in a survival mode and you see everything in black and white but life is more than that. This pile make me so sad. It is like I'm not reading for HOW you lure people in it is like WHAT people's reaction when they see you and it is completely two different things. I think that this pile need to work on their perception of themselves because the way you see yourself play a major role of how people treat you. I think that you have self worth issues and you think that you do not deserve happiness or love or friendship. You are telling yourself the SAME damn story to convince yourself that it is what it is but it is not WHAT YOU THINK! I know this awakening is so hard but believe me when you emerge from your cocoon as a beautiful butterfly you'll see how good it is. I feel like many people in this pile are confused of which stage in the spiritual awakening you are in. Personally I've gone through that and this video will help you. I feel like you are in place in your life where survival is an apparent theme and not really anything else. You might be on survival mode for like months or even years. It is not for everyone so take what resonates.

3- How do you lure your romantic interest in?

Okay, due to your distorted self perception of yourself your romantic interests tend to avoid getting closer. But they do see the potential in you. I see that to the opposite gender you might be someone who is considered cute or attractive in general, but the thing is you do not see that yourself. I see that the opposite gender see you as someone who is the wish come true. To them you are someone who is very familiar and lovely. They are so pleased when you talk to them. I told you pile 2. Your self perception is stopping you from going after things that will make you happy. I see that your romantic interest sees how cool and good you are but they fear coming in because of the rejection and heartbreak you'll cause them. I see that you are a forbidden fruit to them. Like they are allowed to look but not allowed to taste or touch. Like a beautiful painting on a wall, they want to get closer to you, they want to touch you and get to know you but you are the one who is running away from anyone who mignt be a good option for you. You might like to start your relationship with the opposite gender as friendship and then develop it into something romantic. I see that your romantic interest view you as someone who is very fortunate, someone who is sweet, bubbly and someone they can trust to have a family with. People in this pile are divided into two sections, one energy here; their romantic interest views them in a sexual lusty way. Like you might be blessed with curves (bigger boobs, nice body shape) they see all of this and they are like "🤤", If you are a man or male I think the opposite gender see you as someone hot or you know very attractive too. I think people in this pile, their romantic interest see you as marriage material. They touch themselves as the thought of you pleasuring them. Others in this pile attracts people like them. Like if you are someone with low self esteem, you'll attract someone with low self esteem too. If you are commitment phobe, you'll attract someone exactly like you. So be careful. In this pile you might feel like your romantic interest mirror your inner self. The trauma, your fears, your doubts, how you see yourself. They mirror it, so please pile 2, try to work on that we want to attract good people into our life.

Placements for this pile:

Gemini, Capricorn, Sagittarius, Water placements or water dominants (Cancer, Scorpio and pisces). Taurus,Virgo, Jupiter, moon, Saturn, Mercury, Pluto dominant. number 3 is significant in this pile.

Pile 3- The light house

Your current energy

Hello pile 3. How are you? I hope you are doing well. First thing I'm picking up on is that this pile is confused. I feel like you just woke up from a deep sleep or you have slept like +9 hours but you are still tried. I feel like this pile are trying to heal and seek clarity. I see that you are trying to label your values and what you really want from life. This pile’s energy are quite serene. You are living your life in a monotone way. Like you wake up, go to work/school/ college, study, eat, go to sleep. And the cycle repeat itself again. You want change in your life but you know that change will not come easily unless it starts from you pile 3. You know that and you are aware of it. You are aware that in order to change you need to work on yourself, you need to get to know your values, what you like and dislike. You want to get to know yourself and what you truly want to live. I see also that you are hanging on a connection that you think has potential but believe me darling, this connection is just an attachment. You are attached to this person and not the other way around. Perhaps, this person may at some point saw something in you but they do not know how to reach out. They do not know how it will work and you know that too. This pile’s energy is very stable, and rational honestly unlike pile 2; I felt like I'm suffocating and I cried while typing their paragraph. Anyways, I see you guys are thinking of moving into another state or country. I see by traveling there; you will put an end to the stagnant energy within you or your life. I see also that this pile will suffer from a short term poor financial state but then everything will be alright. I see that someone might enter your life pile 3, he could be a sagittarius or have sagittarius placements. This person is very driven and sexy omg. I see that soon He will be in your life. The cards are telling me that he will be there all of sudden. His entrance will shake up things in your life for the better. Don't worry pile 3, you will have the cake and eat it too. Soooo enjoy the attention.

1- How do you view yourself?

This pile view themselves as someone who is witty and cunning with a hint of manipulation. I see that you know how to use people to your liking and advantage. I also see that have a pretty convincing way of communicating. You know how to gaslight people to give you want you want. Some people in this pile do manipulate people intentionally, they know what they are doing. I see that you can be pretty lazy and harsh with people. You might have mercury in sagittarius? Or mercury with harsh aspects to pluto? Someone who is very intelligent and lazy. Almost gives me INTP, ISTP, ISTJ, ENTP and some of you could be INFJ or INTJ too. Many of you have been through a lot of financial issues which forced you to leave your lazy tendencies and start seek a job so you can feed yourself. I feel like you are someone who lives alone in their own apartment or own a house by themselves. But you owned this after you worked like a dog to earn this money. I see that some people here lack imagination and you don't really understand why some people call themselves dreamers. You thunk dreaming or imagining things is a dumb thing or you seek the psychological meaning behind it. People in this pile are so logical and pragmatic, you have no connectionto emotions becauseyou think people who think with their heart are stupid. You prefer to see things in objective way. And you hate anything related to theory. You see that there's no use in using theories and you only believe in hard facts. In this pile I see also that you hate being bored I remembered when Lana twitted on X "you are boring me to death and I'm already dead". I think you hate boredom too pile 3. You hate boring people and dumb people. People in this pile can be Narcissists or Machiavellian or you have symptoms of this personality disorder (take what resonates I will not label people here as good or bad you know if you are good or bad pile 3). Also you have a high self esteem and you think that you deserve the world. You might be working right now so you can be in a high position in society. Someone who is authoritative and demanding. You want people to fear you and to respect you more than to like or love you. You get thrilled when someone announce that they hate you and they are your enemy. You like that and it gives you this energy boost. I see also that you are digging your way up, you are trying to prove to yourself that you'll be someone great in the future. You have this enormous drive to you that make you go on and on to reach your goals I'm hearing Marina song "High achiever can't you see, baby nothing come for free" but I forgot the song's name lol. You are always working on your goals and have a vision for the future.

2- How do you lure people in?

Omg this pile is quite bitchy. I hate saying this but people are attracted to you and hate you at the same time. They are attracted to your charm but they hate it when you turn the table on them. You might be someone who LIKES to gossip and because of that almost no one really want to be your friend. People like it when they come to you for advice because you are not swayed by emotions or imagination, you give them your opinion without being shy of sayingthe truth. You lure people in there's this drive to you, the ambition. Especially if you are a man or a male or masculine, everyone droll over how masculine you are. They like how decisive you are. People see the inner power in you, they see how passionate and wonderful you can be. Also you intimidate people, your presence make people uncomfortable because of the powerful aura you show to others. I see also that there's this wonder-ness about you. People in this pile here are not ashamed to explore and discover what they want as I mentioned in the energy check in. I see also that you keep ignoring your intuition and you lack emotional maturity which is soon will be changed. I see one of the lessons you'll learn in this lifetime is to be more emotionally intelligent and to be more compassionate towards others. People see that you are a me me me person. They see that because of your confidence and charm you can be a bit (How can I say it?) You are attention seeker? You are giving me The Weekend vibe idk why😭.

3- How do you lure your romantic interest in?

Your possible romantic interest view you as someone who is warm and optimistic. Most of your romantic interest crush on you because of how you look. They have no idea how dangerous you can be lol. Anyways, your romantic interests view you as someone who doesn't have man friends or a lone wolf even if you are an extrovert and you know a lot of people they assume that you are a lone wolf who doesn't have many friends. I see that your romantic interest are mostly dreamers or people who are delusional. Or I see that you attract people who are the total opposite of your personality. It is for a reason and the reason is to connect more with your emotional side. Your romantic interest feel scared of approaching you because you appear a bit unbalanced or a player. They see you as someone who will probably play them and fuck with their heart (A heartbreaker honestly). You might be someone who is considered attractive to people in the country you are living in. I see that you have a very sexy aura and you sexual energy is out of the chart. You might post nudes of yourself just to tease your crushes online. You have many stalkers too. If you are a guy many girls stalk you online. And if you are a female/girls/feminine many guys harass you online and they send you +18 pic of their.... you know. I see also that your romantic interest view you as someone who is quite harsh with words or someone who is very honest like bluntly honest which most of the time hurt their feelings. Your romantic interest view you as someone who they see a long term relationship with. They see you as someone who can pull them out of their shell. Also someone who is very smart and intelligent. They like how smart you are.

Placements for this pile

Air placements or dominant (Gemini, Libra and Aquarius). Sagittarius, Leo especially the ascendant, Capricorn, Sun, Mercury, Venus, jupiter as dominant planets in your chart.

Pile 4- Eye of a mermaid

Your current energy

Hello pile 4, how are you? Well let's get into the energy check of yours. First thing I'm picking up on is that you are either in love with someone who doesn't love you back or you have ended a romantic relationship because of a third party. But what mostly obvious here is that there's chasing and convincing. I see that you or the other person are chasing one another and no it is not mutual. It is like the more feminine energy in this connection is putting too much effort that the man started to feel egoistic and self assured that the feminine won't leave him. I see that you guys are very generous and selfless people. You have many friends and you are spending majority of time asking for their advice on your love life. It is painful honestly, I feel like my heart is sinking. You have many potential pile 4 and whatever you are chasing won't come to you unless you detach and forget about it. It is okay if we love someone and they don't love us back but the problem is when you hang your WHOLE existence around that perosn. Love is pure, genuine, it is the most pure energy in this universe. So, don't be sad that they are not sharing their love with you. Instead, be concerned on how to detach from that person. Another energy I'm picking up on is that you might be in a fwb situation or poly relationship. I see many parties interfering with the relationship that you feel the person you are loving is not loving you back. This person honestly is not the best so, try to move yourself out of the situation and give them a block for 2 months. If this person tried to reach out during these 2 months then they care for you and if not then you are just a replacement (sorry for being harsh on you pile 4). I see that this pile here there's someone perhaps a soulmate. This person is coming too soon into your life so whatever situation you are in, you'll find someone who will give you the love that you give to others and they will held you accountable. Okay my dears?

1- How do you view yourself?

Okay, first thing I'm picking up on is that you are someone who really hate change. You can literally eat the same food, do the same routine and live on the same frequency for ages without trying to change you life circumstances. Also, I see that you are someone who is very smart and intelligent. You see yourself as someone who is not swayed by delusions. The funny thing is (what I'm picking up on intuitively) that you say that you don't believe in tarot, astrology or paranormal stuff but you manage to read tarot or like being curious about your placements and other stuff. I see that you see yourself as someone who is pessimistic and not that funny or optimistic at all. The cards are also telling me that you need to change or at least accept the idea of change. You appear as someone who is very charming, tempting or someone who is quite attractive to others. Also you are someone who is very active, you like to keep yourself busy during the day. I see a job that requires you to stay active and in service. You could be a waiter/ waitress or cashier? Someone who is always moving. And if not then you are an athletic who have to always be training. You are someone who is always in their head. You might have anxiety or anxiety attacks randomly. You might also try to surrender to circumstances but there's this voice inside you that always nagging you to keep fighting and pushing back. I guess that's why you are always pessimistic pile 4, it is because you hate how you are forcing yourself to keep going. Because after all this enforcement you are not getting the result you aspire to get at all. You are someone who is very generous with time, effort and money. I see that you view yourself as someone who is very cooperative and if not then you view yourself as an extrovert who have many friends. The cards keep replying the same idea which is the selflessness. You need yo balance the give and take energy in you. If someone gave you attention try to give them the same amount they are giving you and don't take it too far. I see that you have people pleaser tendencies. I see that you don't really see the people pleasing thing as a problem at all. Like you truly like to help others because it heals something in you. I'm picturing Monica Gellir from Friends. She have this strong energy, presence and above all she is so caring and hard worker. You may have something in common with her. I see that you are someone who is a bit romantic too. You like romance, but you see those people on tiktok who read lots of romantic stuff and when someone actually is interested they cringe? You might be like that. I see that you are someone who is very loyal, especially to your friends. You might have you venus or moon in Taurus. I'm sensing here a lot of devotion from you guys unlike pile 3 they are narcissists lol.

2- How do you lure people in?

Pile 4 are you an ENFJ/ESFJ? I feel like this pile are a knight in a shining armor. I feel also that you project a picture to people that is not true about yourself. You may pretend like you have a specific traits that are not in you or you lie about sensitive stuff to avoid the hard feelings that come with it. Many people in this pile are very active and action oriented. People see you as someone with a lot of energy to give to others. I see that you are very helpful and people like that. The way you lure people in is a mix of fogginess and helpfulness. Or you may see that at first people project alot of stuff into you, they may tell you things that is not necessary you. Pile 4 do you have neptune/ascendant aspects? Because people always tend to project into you stuff that are not there. People may view you as someone who is naive, others tend to view you as someone who is manipulative. And so on and so forth. I see that also people view you as someone who lack imagination and if you are imaginative by nature then they see that you are someone who is not spiritual at all. They may tell you that you look helpless even though you know where exactly you are going. There's this fog around how people view you. They can't quite tap into who you truly is! Which leave you misunderstood by others. You are exactly like someone for ex, who spent their whole life being told that they are selfish but you are not selfish and you know that. I see that people see you as someone who is a hard worker. They see your efforts and they appreciate them too. People (because of the projection thing) can't really tell you who you truly are. They see the effort you put but not your potential. You may get laughed at when you claim to want to be a model, a singer or anything because people don't seem to think that you can do that. In fact you can, it is just the thoughts of them that they project onto you which is quite sad honestly. People tend to get possessive of you and attached not because of who you are, but because of who they view you to be. It is like those people have something missing and they paint you with what is missing in their life and they claim that you fulfill all the things that is missing from their life. It is sad honestly because they can't see you for who you truly are, instead they project into you. This pile feels like an object to other people which keep them stuck in the same patterns. I guess from what I'm seeing in the cards that your life mission is to get to know yourself and stop letting others project into you.

3- How you lure your romantic interest in?

Okay, your romantic interest see that you are someone who is very independent and ambitious. You may attract a lot of mentally ill people into your life? Or people with avoidant attachment style or peoplewho are non-committed? I see that this people are quite manipulative. Like for ex, they may lie to you about something that they don't have and then you get shocked of the truth. I see that this pile attracts many cheaters. Or people who is considered a walking red flag. People in this pile may have dated people who do not love them. Not love, I see lust. The opposite gender may lust over you a lot sadly. You may be someone who is considered attractive or beautiful in social standards. You attract many cheaters into your life and indecisive people too. Like okay, those people can never be serious or committed to you at all. I'm picking up on the other woman vibe. A girl or a woman who is so beautiful, she have a big heart but all she get from the opposite gender is cheating, lies non-committed relationships or you may be the side chick in the relationship. That's why in the beginning of the reading I felt this sense of unrequited love! It is because you want a relationship, you want love but you can't seem to attract those to you and it is frustrating! You may always try to prove that you are more than a beautiful face/body but unfortunately they only see you as a sexual object. And if you are a man you may have dated several women who were not serious about committing to you or women who is considered hot but are superficial and only cares about money (like more than who you truly are). This pile is sad honestly, all people here are not seen for who they truly are but instead who people want them to be. So, I see that you'll take a reflecting period and quit dating for a while just to see what you truly want and if you are already doing that then good for you pile 4. You deserve applause 👏🏻. Take time and detach, learn how to love yourself, and seek the truth! You truth and what truly matter in your life.

Placements for this pile

Fire placements especially Aries, Air placements (Gemini, Libra and Aquarius). Earth placements (capricorn, virgo and taurus). Saturn, Mercury, jupiter, Uranus, neptune, sun dominant.

Post dated: 22nd of Sep/2024- Sun

*Feedback is appreciated

#free divination #free tarot #pick a card #pick a pile #tarot community #divination #divination readings #metaphysical #occult #tarot pac #tarot reading #tarotblr #tarot cards #tarotcommunity #pick a picture #tarot

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pumpkinfyre · 2 months ago

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Hello. Yandere husband Jaehaerys i Targaryen and wife reader (she not Alysanne) and yandere platonic children.(Jaeh and reader's children. Daenaerys/ Aemon/ Baelon/ Alyssa/ Maegelle/ Vaegon/ Daella/Saera/Viserra/ Gael)

cw's: yandere content, unhealthy relationships, romantic and platonic relationships, abuse and death, maegor's wives are mentioned, arranged marriage, mention of alysanne, non-incestuous marriage hooray, infant death, mentally unstable reader, jaehaerys lowk having a breeding kink lol

Jaehaerys is a gentle husband, and for good reason. He grew up watching his uncle mistreat several women, even kill them, for no good reason. Watching the Black Brides be killed and abused for no reason at all, Jaehaerys wants to be a good husband to his future wife, nor matter the situation.

So, when Jaehaerys is initially married to his wife, he tries his best to be accommodating towards her. Jaehaerys becomes king at a very young age, and therefore, he gets married at a young age. He had initially wanted to marry his sister, Alysanne, but his wife was chosen for him by his mother, Alyssa Velaryon. Despite his initial disappointment, Jaehaerys becomes very fond of his lady wife. He grows more than fond as their marriage progresses, and by the end of the first year together, he's completely hooked.

The courting process happens after they're married. Jaehaerys realizes that arranged marriages are harder for women than men, so he tries to be very kind and accommodating. At first, his lady wife takes advantage of this and keeps her distance from Jaehaerys, most likely knowing of his past affection for his sister. Alysanne was married to Alaric Stark and thus lived in the Riverlands. Still, the thought of her husband harboring affection for another woman is likely discouraging for his new wife.

This bothers Jaehaerys quite a bit because he's become infatuated with his wife. He wants her to adore him just as much as he adores her. Things change once their first child, Aegon, is born. Jaehaerys' new wife changes with motherhood. She loves her son and covets him like a star, so when Aegon dies as an infant, she's absolutely destroyed. The only person who truly understands her pain is Jaehaerys, so she seeks comfort in her husband for the first time since she was forced to marry him.

When they go on to lose their second child, Daenerys, Jaehaerys becomes very protective over his wife. Mentally, she isn't doing well, so he keeps her distanced away from anyone who mentions the death of Daenerys. Their other children are very close with their mother, Baelon, and Aemon take after Jaehaerys in being protective over their mother, as does Alyssa and Saera. Alyssa, Gael, and Maegelle are very close with her, and Jaehaerys becomes relaxed, knowing that they have plenty of children to keep his wife content.

Viserra, ever the diva, likes to bring her mother out into the city to shop. I imagine her as a mama's girl, and she's absolutely spoiled by her mother. The silk and velvet dresses, diamond encrusted tiaras, and fluffy pillows are all things Viserra has commissioned for her momma. They even have matching dresses!

Gael and Maegelle would cling to their mother, as would Daella. Daella is terrified of dragons, and I imagine so would Jaehaerys' wife, so they're content to read in the garden together. Maegelle and Gael are similar, always following their mother around the Keep like little ducklings.

Vaegon, much like his older brothers, is protective over his mother. I feel like the boys have that Targaryen supremacy ideology, so they believe that since their mother isn't a Targaryen, she's weak. They all believe she needs to be protected, much like how Jaehaerys feels.

All in all, their children love their mama, and Jaehaerys has a horrid breeding mentality. The loss of their children, especially those who died in infancy, left his wife depressed and desolate. Jaehaerys believed that producing more children would fix her sadness.

haha, I hope this was good enough 😅 I love thinking about how it would have been if jaehaerys and alysanne hadn't married each other, but it's so sad that she lost so many children :(

masterlist ᡣ𐭩

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daisys-reality · 6 months ago

Text

── 🥝ꜞ˖ ꒰ 𝙿𝙰𝙲: Connecting with your desired reality ꒱

⌇ reality shifting themed tarot reading | general disclaimers apply | masterlist

𝙿𝙸𝙻𝙴 𝙾𝙽𝙴 🥥

Trusting that that’s exactly where you need to be right now. Doing things that make you feel wholesome. Feeling connections with your precious people. Feeling emotions in regards to your connections with your DR people (love, empathy, hate, excitement, sadness, anger…). Your bonds with those people create a strong foundation. Meditating about being in your DR to feel inner peace - to feel at home (do it regularly - maybe even daily, not to shift, just for the sake of feeling at home and basking in the connection with your DR until it becomes second nature). Practice feeling gratitude (for your connections, for your DR, for all the opportunities given to you) and let this feeling wash through your whole body. Practice experiencing your DR through your senses - revel through beauty (aesthetics), art (moodboards), music (playlists, ambience videos), scents and sensuality (imagining the feeling of your DR clothes or the things around you or imaginary acts of love-dovey stuff lol). Make it a sweet experience (imagine tasting the food in your DR you’ve been dying to try, kissing your lover which you longed for for so long, speaking gently words to the people dear to you heart and imagine seeing them smile fondly at you) - involve your emotions or focus on how these things make you feel - don’t force it, just observe and acknowledge. Your deep emotions are your strong point.

Don’t focus too much on the “finally getting there” part - for you this is not just a magical quick transition because it already started with your first shifting attempt, it all is a part of you transitioning - you need to focus more so on the slowly merging of yourself and this world - acknowledge the transitions and feel it intensely - in order to do so you must be fully present and ‘awake’ in the sense of you actively recognizing what you’re doing with no expectations or rules about what “should be”. You don’t need anyone's approval. Instead, just be unconditionally in awe of what this life is offering/presenting to you. Beauty is everywhere and you have the natural ability to see it. Devote yourself to it (seeing it). It will increase your mood, your energy and your ability to connect with what you desire.

Learning to rely on faith is a major thing in all kinds of spiritual practices. Letting loose and putting trust in yourself/the universe etc. Acknowledge personal fears and issues, finding out where they’re coming from and learning how to deal with them. Healing parts of yourself with patience, love and devotion. Devotion to yourself and your happiness. There is no need to rush. Time is irrelevant. Connect the mundane everyday life with the otherworld. Make your human life magical. You have a knack for it.

If you are struggling with the “trusting” part and are more so the type to be a ‘control freak’ maybe try to switch your perception of things, like this for example: “Change is coming whether you like it or not. You may be feeling like things are out of your control, maybe they are. You will be forced to shift, you will be forced to be in your DR - fight against or accept it”.

Also, maybe do not try to talk about this with others in your CR, I feel like there are a few people in your environment (family or friends) who are not trustworthy enough and might make you out to be crazy - which might hurt and discourage you a lot. Please be careful with who you share all this with. Others might not be able to appreciate these things like you do. You’re such a precious person. Don’t let others dim your light.

𝙿𝙸𝙻𝙴 𝚃𝚆𝙾 🌱

Doing activities here that relate to your DR that bring you immense joy and a sense of belonging, daydreaming freely about your DR and realizing consciously that all your fantasy will come true (the desired ones obviously) - see how that makes you feel and bask in that feeling. Making use of your creativity (making DR related content like posts, moodboards, playlists or stories or DR related clothes, accessories etc.), meditating on and/or imagining things about your DR that give you a sense of safety and emotional fulfillment ( ex. with relationships and family). Be at peace with your DR. Gaining inner peace will make you overflow with clarity and grace, reaching beyond depths, through your cells in your body to your soul. Practice feeling at home in your DR (imagine/visualize your DR self doing daily activities or self care at home etc.). Know that the ‘wholeness’ you feel in your DR with your precious DR people reflects the wholeness you’ve created for yourself. Doing things in the way that they align with your personal values will give you immense strength and resilience - you don’t need to bend over backwards or stretch yourself thin.

Don’t follow every other person and their advice, just follow your heart. I know that putting a lot of effort and energy into a situation is wearing you down, especially when you are not seeing the return. Right now you might lack confidence and feel as though you don't really know what you're doing. Or you might feel like something is hindering you from expressing the full range of your skills/ideas and keeping you locked up in a box, when all you want to do is to be free and flourish! You might be a little ungrounded or suppressing something - not wanting to deal with it - which confuses you in return. I feel like you’re someone who struggles with knowing what you really want, letting yourself be influenced by other people's dreams/desires and therefore being indecisive about a lot of things. In your case, feeling stuck and unfulfilled is increasing your awareness of what you do want. This suspension in time is actually a blessing in disguise! Meditating on your ‘issues’ so that you can gain clarity before making any moves/decisions - clarity about your DR, who you want to be and what you want to experience - this clarity will bring you closer to your DR - emotionally but also on the mental/consciousness sphere (I don’t really want to say ‘physically’ here in this context but I hope you know what I mean lol). Sitting still and realizing that your life is bigger than this one moment. There are endless options and opportunities for you. Don’t get discouraged and keep moving. Every step you take is a step closer to your happiness (even if you can’t see it at that time, know that there is only movement forward not backwards).

Be innovative, do things with grace and ease - it comes naturally to you. (Your DR people, the universe, we as a community etc) We all have your back, there is no need to worry or be anxious. You are safe. Time is irrelevant. Once you’re clear about your intentions and use them to fuel purposeful action. The more specific you are (about your overall intentions - not necessarily about your DR or script), the more you magnetize your creative energy and manifesting magic.

Try reassessing what you worship everyday (consciously or unconsciously). What are you elevating? Where does this ‘sacred ladder’ you climb ultimately lead to? What if instead of putting your DR at the center of your spiritual/shifting practice, you put yourself, a god/goddess, the universe or nature at the center? Think about how that would change your approach. I think honoring, devoting and worshiping something gives you a lot of joy, energy and an overwhelming sense of love and gratitude. Being humbled by the immense sense of wonder this life can bring leads to a shift in your perception. You can be in awe and feel breathtaking delight of this otherworldly opportunity (called shifting), it is very natural to do so. But even if you put it on a pedestal, don’t twist its nature of existence. There is no need to sacrifice something or to acquire a certain worth first to be able to finally shift. The ability to shift ‘realities’ is an innate ability of our consciousness, there is nothing being asked to be done in return. Being in awe about something and honoring it, does not equal giving your power away. Don’t forget or undermine yourself on this journey.

When we were children (and even now), we can barely comprehend the vastness of our own lives, let alone the existence of other planets and realities. It’s not long before we learn we (as in our CR self) aren’t necessarily the center of the universe: We are specks of stardust in one of its many skies. But we must all still do our part to take care of our own individual worlds, or else it throws everything else off-balance. So take care of your own little world (your mind, body...) but keep in mind that you are not alone in this world. Help and support is always available.

Some quotes for you: “The distance between two objects is always relative. Objects in a mirror are closer than they appear.” ; “Don’t just take the picture - enter it.”; “Accept what you desire, not what you feel pressured to desire.”; “Be proud of the person you’ve become.”

𝙿𝙸𝙻𝙴 𝚃𝙷𝚁𝙴𝙴 🫐

There is something toxic going on in your psychic realm aka in your subconscious. It might be present in your relationships with people and things, in your environment or in your thoughts/speech patterns in the way that your words have a sting of poison in them. Regardless of what it is, it needs to be identified and acknowledged first. Change comes second. Overall, I can see a theme of “self-realization through suffering”. Right now, you might feel a little scattered, moody and directionless or like you being off-course. It feels like you’re hesitating in taking control of your life. You might be holding back due to various reasons. Sorry for having to call you out but you need to start to take responsibility for your inner resistance and make choices. Because of this lack of control you’re unable to handle any stress and pressure. It feels like your life is running over with way too much drama that you can barely keep up with. It's a very unpleasant feeling tbh.

Remember when you harm others, you harm yourself. A very negative outlook on others, yourself, your shifting journey or your life will only chain you to the ground - slowly clouding your focus, draining you of your willpower and leaving you only with frustration and aggression.

There might be two or more forces pulling your psyche into seemingly opposite directions. As humans we tend to see things in black & white, forgetting all the gray in between. There might be someone or something (a feeling/desire) in your life that begins to fade away, or maybe is gone altogether now. You might want to hold onto it or bring it back to life in your DR. But the advice here is “Don’t fight it”. There are no neat and tidy bows to tie things up at the end, leaving you satisfied. Acceptance isn’t easy but it’s a thing you need to work towards. We create our own closure. You shouldn't build a home that will come crumbling down if a single person walks out of the front door, right? When it comes down to it, we can’t depend on other people or things to make us feel happy or fulfilled. Fact is that people/things are going to leave from time to time and you’re the only one who’s guaranteed to stay. Take time to find sources of joy outside of your beloved people and things (ex. through mediating). You deserve happiness that lasts. So try to rethink your plans/ideas for your DR first of all.

In addition, I think what you need right now is stability and structure. As I said in the beginning you need to make a choice/decision on where your destination is. Make a move and try to gain back a sense of control. Don’t get discouraged when you hit some road blocks along the way. Give yourself direction by choosing to live with a purpose and/or intention. You should know that forcing outcomes can be disappointing and will not ultimately satisfy your needs. Try to build a routine or a ritual. Whether small or large, honoring rituals can help you feel grounded and connecting to your DR. You might even join a group that has a similar interest in your DR world or start something together with a friend creating rules you can follow together. It might give you a sense of acceptance, unity and strengthen your beliefs and resolve. Try to gain more knowledge about your DR - for example if it’s in a ‘fictional’ universe try to watch/read the original CR source or read fanfictions - anything that gives you more of a feeling of how this world works, how people interact etc. While doing so you might come up with a lot more ideas you can’t wait to discuss with others. Your excitement and creativity might come back. You feel the need to put ideas into action and just go for it. Writing and speaking might come easily to you - so anything that involves that might be good to connect with your DR (ex. journaling, letter writing, vaunting, talking to yourself as your DR self). You will want to find answers and your drive will be immense. Your will be unstoppable and success inevitable. So go after what you want, and you will succeed!

#࣪ pick a card𓈒 𐙚 #࣪ shifting𓈒 𐙚 #shifting #shiftblr #desired reality #pick a card #pick a picture #pick a pile #free tarot reading #tarot reading #tarotblr #loassumption #connect with your DR #shifting advice #shifting methods #shifting community #࣪ tarot𓈒 𐙚

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yoredoesmore · 7 months ago

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Okay I have a request with Hoshina Soshiro. So maybe some angst thing but fluff. Okay so since reader joined hoshina team she flirted with him, give him things , complement him yk? And he would mostly ignore her, give her extra training ANYTHING to make her go away cuz he didn't want to lose her on mission (dangerous job) but she didn't know that. So it lasted for like long time and a new member joined and he started to flirt with reader, give her flowers itp. And she unfortunately thought that making hoshina love her is like against his own will. She doesn't want to be a b so she leaves him alone. And he doesn't like that at all? I love that kind of fanfic. 🎀

Words cannot describe how much i love this request!! thank you so much for this, i hope you enjoy what i came up with!!

Attention | Hoshina Soshiro

pairing: jealous!hoshina soshiro x reader

summary: you stop giving hoshina your attention and he doesn't like that at all.

genre: romance/angst/jealousy/fluff | [wc: 3.3k ]

a/n: my very first request (so exciting!!) i hope i do your wishes justice! hoshina is kinda mean in this one, lol ^^

enjoy!

“Vice Captain Hoshina!” You chimed in an enthusiastic voice, your body moving over to the man's disappearing figure. The vice captain did not even bother to turn around, nor halt in his footsteps as he heard you approach him. Even as you finally catched up, his gaze remained focused on the scene ahead.

“Today's mission went surprisingly well, don't you think!” Excitement hung in your voice, even as Vice Captain Hoshina remained unbothered by your presence. You were all too used to his unbothered demeanor, his avoiding gazes and the lingering silence, therefore you did what you always did in these situations– keep the conversation alive.

“But honestly, with you as our Vice Captain I didn't expect anything else–”

“Your movements towards the end of the battle were sloppy and unprofessional. Talking about a successful mission, tsk, is there nothing else but air in your head? You could have seriously gotten hurt.” His voice was sharp and mocking but the worst part was, it stung.

It has been a little over a year since you joined the Third Division. Despite all your attempts of building a healthy relationship between you and the Vice Captain, nothing much has changed so far. All the compliments, all the gifts and hard work– none of them had been able to bring change to your chemistry. And watching him turn into this jolly ball of joy when talking to the other cadets definitely didn't make you feel better either. It sometimes discouraged you from continuing this sad pursuit of his attention, but only sometimes.

“Seriously, If you wanna stay in this division and continue being part of these missions you gotta be better than that. What even happened back there?!’

A strong force rushed through your lungs, your mind recalling the last minutes of battle. It silenced you immediately.

A Yoju had appeared right behind your exhausted figure, catching you off guard. In any normal situation you would have drawn your weapon at light speed and blast right through the monster but something had stopped you.

The Vice Captain himself.

Nobody else saw it, how could they have– Vice Captain Hoshina did his best to conceal his little mistake. But you took notice of it, of the Vice Captain actually missing his target. It was unexpected to say the least, distracting as well. But the Kaiju blood that ran down his face, temporarily took his vision and that caused his momentum to shift. He lost his balance for a split second and let the Yoju escape from his weapon. He immediately caught up with the monster but the worry that engulfed your stomach was enough to temporarily cause your brain to shut down.

If it hadn't been for Reno calling you back into reality you would have seriously gotten hurt indeed.

“I apologize Cap–”

“Don't bother.” And with that said he left the scene, joining the others in a discussion of how to proceed with the mission.

“Are you alright Y/n..?” Shinomiya approached you, her gentle hand finding its way on your shoulders.

“Yes, I'm alright. Guess he wasn't in the mood to talk, haha..”

This was just one of many failed attempts of you trying to charm Hoshina.

About a week later you were wandering through the hallways of Tachikawa Base. The sun had long kissed the world goodnight, leaving only the dimmed light of the moon to illuminate the building. Sleep was unable to find you, thus you decided to take a short stroll around the building.

It calmed you, watching the stars live in perfect harmony with the moon. They were able to enjoy its presence, even from a distance– just like you were still able to appreciate Hoshina.

He wasn't all that bad honestly. What happened a week ago was a rare occasion, he only got worked up like that when you gave a sloppy performance during a mission.

Perhaps he just wanted you to improve? One could view your way of thinking as delusional, yes, but you preferred to think that you were just optimistic.

On your way back to your dorm you heard subtle sounds in the distance. A few grunts here and some equipment being moved there. Allowing curiosity to take the best of you, you investigated the strange noise. What you found left you shocked and motionless.

The Vice Captain was up and about in the training room, moving in ways you have so rarely seen him in. His body became one with his weapon, it was as if they molded into one to perform something magical. Seeing him in action, in his element, it reminded you why you still chased after Hoshina. He was just perfect in every single aspect, from looks to abilities. You watched him just a little longer, until you decided to step back and return to your dorm to not get into any trouble for being up so late.

“And where do you think you're going?” A single sentence from his lips was enough for your body to become imobile. The Vice Captain was the scariest during battles, when neutralizing Kaiju, everybody knew that. But whatever vibe he was emitting right now, it felt just as dangerous. With each step he took towards your body you could feel your limbs grow weaker and weaker.

“It's quite disrespectful to stare. And on top of that you're walking around past the curfew. Honestly Y/n, it's starting to get annoying.”

“I apologize. I couldn't sleep, that's why I–”

“Give me 50.” Hoshina interrupted you, turning back around to collect his things.

“I..are you serious?” The last thing you wanted was to sound disrespectful, but his cold demeanor was starting to affect you in a way you had hoped it never would.

His body bent forward to grab both his katana and zip jacket. For only a moment his eyes met yours.

“Yes. And while you're already at it, try working on your reflexes and stealth as well, I could hear you from miles away. Your mistakes of last week's battle could have cost you your life. Don't let it happen again."

His gaze fell onto the ground and his grip on the jacket tightened. Like always you were unable to make out what concrete emotions he was hiding behind those eyes but his voice pretty much gave away what state he was currently in.

He was pissed.

As Hoshina walked towards the exit, he made sure to throw one last look at you. You didn't notice it but even if you had, it would have made no sense to you..

The following weeks continued to all look the same. While you were trying your best to uphold a positive attitude towards the Vice Captain, it felt like he was distancing himself further and further away from you. Even the other cadets were starting to wonder when you were finally going to move on and give up.

“Hoshina!” You exclaimed cheerfully, waving at the man. “I hope you had a great weekend. I'm looking forward to today's work!”

Like always he just passed you by, not even bothering to give you anything else than a roll of his eyes or a nod (when he was feeling generous).

Even when you left little notes for him or small treats on his desk, you would always later on find them in the trash.

“Wanna go out and drink something together?”

“No.”

“Excuse me, but could you please help me with–”

“I'm busy.”

“Why wasn't I called in to participate at the weapon testing–”

“Because.”

This went on for a couple more months, until a certain someone brought you back to reality.

“Please welcome Tanaka Yosuke, the newest addition to our team.”.

Tanaka was an interesting guy. He was sweet and nice and always had something positive about you to say. On missions he would have your back and even off the battlefield he would make you feel warm and welcomed. Being with him made you realize just how much attention you actually deserved and maybe even how much you wasted on Hoshina. Tanaka made you appreciate how nice it felt to be sought out for once.

Your words did not pass him by, nor did any of your actions go unnoticed by his attentive eyes. He was someone you were able to feel comfortable around.

“Y/n!” His voice immediately caused a smile to appear on your face. Tanaka stood in front of you, a playful grin shining right back at you as he approached your seated body. You were at the base’s cafeteria, enjoying a simple meal by yourself. After another failed attempt of talking to the Vice Captain you believed that you deserved a little treat.

“I got you something.” He spoke, hands reaching into the small bag he brought with him.

A sharp breath escaped your lips and a feeling so fuzzy engulfed your heart it almost knocked you off the chair.

“Look, aren't these flowers beautiful.” White Lilies swayed in the wind, brought by the Kaiju’s collapse. Only this group of flowers had stayed untouched from the destruction, maintaining their beauty.

You had made one little remark about the flowers but here this man was, surprising you with a whole bouquet of them. As your fingers grazed over the soft petals a thought suddenly occurred in your head.

What if Hoshina genuinely disliked you?

It wasn't a brand new discovery. Vice Captain Hoshina not being a fan of yours was quite obvious, yet you thought that his opinion about you could be swayed if you tried hard enough, like in movies. But seeing him dodge you like a bullet and going out of his way to hurt your feelings..maybe you were a bother after all..

Spending more time with Tanaka and less around the Vice Captain felt strange. You wondered if he noticed or if he even cared about the lack of your presence. The thought occupied your mind even while you were looking at your gift.

But did that mean that you like Tanaka..? Despite being a sweet guy, all you saw in him was a comrade who you could call a good friend. No one could ever compare to the Hoshina that you met years ago, before you joined the decision. The sweet man who saved you that day..the man you fell in love with.

“These flowers are beautiful, Tanaka.” But that didn't change the fact that Tanaka's eyes were different. They looked at you, not past or beyond, they stared right at you and made sure to perceive you.

“Not as beautiful as the one who is holding them..”

For a brief moment you felt your heart skip a beat, Tanaka's words melting on your ears like butter. While you were losing yourself in this warm feeling you didn't notice the person who was lingering behind the wall, watching the scene unfold with sharp eyes.

“Tsk..”

“That new guy, what's his name again?” Hoshina rested his body against one of the bookshelves, arms crossed over his chest as he watched the Captain arrange some files.

“You mean Tanaka Yosuke? What's with him?” Mina's gaze remained on the countless sheets of papers in front of her, only moving up once to give the man a questioning look.

“Something about him seems off, I don't like the guy.”

“Oh please.” The woman finally averted her attention to her friend, a smug smile hanging on her lips.

“You're just mad that Y/n is paying him attention, much more than you recently.” The last part of that sentence came out as a mumble yet Hoshina’s sharp ears picked up on Mina's remark.

“As if.” Hoshina scoffed. “It's just, he is always dragging Y/n to the front of every battle and acts as if he has known her for ages.”

“You want him to act like you? Cold and ignorant, even after knowing that she is one of the sweetest people around.” Although Mina tried to add a playful touch to her voice, the backlash of her words stayed strong.

“Everybody knows that Y/n is, or maybe now was, head over heels for you– yes even I picked up on that. Yet for some reason you are a complete asshole to the poor girl. But now that she has decided to stop paying you that special kind of attention you want to complain and talk about some "I miss her” and what not. Give me a break.”

Hearing these words come out of the Captain's mouth felt like a strong jab to the side. Hoshina found himself unable to respond, react in any way, really. Like a block of ice he stood motionless in the room, mouth slightly open.

“Play with a girl's heart for too long and she will leave you in the past. You men have the audacity to treat the woman who cares for you like trash and ignore her but get upset when she starts showing affection to another man who actually treats her right, how childish.”

A paper ball suddenly came flying towards Hoshina’s head. He let the crumbled item hit his skull. His eyes followed it as it bounced off his head and fell to the ground, rolling around for a little longer until it eventually stopped moving. A strange taste now sat in his mouth. It was bitter yet blunt, how irritating..

"Whatever reason you have to act this way, just stop. Tell Y/n face to face how you actually feel and give that poor thing a break for gods sake."

The day came to an end rather quickly today. Only hours ago you were out with Tanaka, enjoying some time together and now you were already headed to bed. But before you decided to tell the world goodnight you had to make one quick stop at the base's library.

There was a book about flowers Tanaka gave you that you wanted to lend out, to be able to properly tent your gift. But as you searched through the countless isles, too concentrated on quickly finding the copy, a loud noise suddenly pulled you back to reality.

“Vice Captain..” You stuttered, startled by Hoshinas' sudden appearance. The man stood in front of you, his usual nonchalant expression printed on his face. You were ready to apologize for being out this late once again but before you were even able to open your mouth you were silenced.

“You've been avoiding me..” He spoke in such a low tone you almost didn't hear him.

“I've been…what?”

“You've been avoiding me, Y/n.” Hoshina took a step forward, invading a fraction of your personal space. A gasp slipped from your lips but he continued to stare you down.

“Well..I was under the impression that I was bothering you, Vice Captain, so I backed down a li–”

“Now you can't even say my name anymore?” Another step was taken towards your direction.

Hoshina's playful demeanor had completely disappeared, all that was left was a stoic facade. But something about the way he positioned himself above you, his sharp eyes looking down at your frame as if they were guarding you– it fell off. Despite appearing cold and upset, he somehow seemed..vulnerable?

“I really don't understand what is going on here. I thought you didn't like me?”

It seemed like Hoshina wanted to say something along the lines of “what gave you that idea” but he quickly realized that those words would have not helped him at all. Thus he remained silent for a while, his arms crossing over his chest as his gaze fell onto the wall.

“That Tanaka guy, is he your latest obsession?”

“Excuse me?” You mildly snapped. “Yosuke is a friend of mine, a very nice guy and an amazing fighter.” Hearing you speak his first name so casually caused a nerve to snap in Hoshina’s body.

“He is a completely irresponsible guy if you ask me. Dragging you out to the front of every battle, making you fight all these Yoju– it's like he's setting you up for injuries.” As if the Vicevice Captain's words didn't irritate you enough, he had the audacity to add a scoff, leaving you confused and slightly vexed.

“Orrr maybe he just trusts in my abilities. But with all respect sir, what are you talking about? Are you here to hand out another punishment or is this some type of joke, pretending to suddenly care about me and all..” Silence hushed over the space as your question stayed unanswered. It was beyond obvious that your words triggered something in Hoshina but you didn't know what it was. The lack of a conversation allowed you to reflect on past interactions. Despite hish harsh words, this was the third time that the Vice Captain has mentioned you potentially getting hurt during battle.

Was he maybe..

“I apologize for my tone..” You suddenly sighed.

“But Vice Captain Hoshina, I think I have made it quite clear that I..that I like you yet you don't seem even the tiniest bit interested in me. Which is okay, I get it, but how come that now that i'm finally leaving you alone, you all of a–”

The door to the library suddenly swung open, cutting you off mid sentence.

“Y/n?” Tanaka called out, looking around the empty space.

Hoshina had reacted before you could even realize what was going on. The Vice Captain quickly pulled you into his embrace, so that your back rested against his chest, and placed his hands over your mouth. The mild sensation you felt only moments ago in your stomach now fully exploded, causing a strong heat to rush through your body.

“Weird..the others told me that she would be here..” Tanaka looked around one last time before turning off the lights and closing the door behind him. You thought that Hoshina would let you go but his grip around your waist stayed strong.

“Y/n..” He lowered his face to softly talk into your ear. Something inside the man felt relieved. Now that you were both standing in complete darkness, unable to see each other, he could finally confess what was on his mind.

“As a Vice Captain it is my duty to charge head first into battle, despite knowing that I could die any second. You are persistent by nature, I saw that during our first encounter a couple years ago, so the thought of you being stubborn enough to follow me on the battlefield and potentially getting hurt always haunted me. I..I tried getting rid of you to prevent that from happening and during the process I must have hurt you a lot and I am so sorry. I kept ignoring you because being close to you..it made it so fucking difficult to not–”

Hoshina stopped himself from continuing that sentence and let go of you, his body's heat becoming too overwhelming. With every second your eyes adjusted more and more to the darkness, until you were properly able to see him.

“Don't run after any other man when I'm right here, Y/n..”

“Hoshina..”

You could only see fragments of it but Hoshina was smiling. Hearing you finally drop the formalities made him happier than it should.

All this time, the man you thought hated you for purely existing had a special spot in his heart reserved just for you. It felt weird, being perceived by him, but at the same time there was no sweeter feeling.

“I don't know if I can just forgive you yet..” You joked. “It's gonna take a lot more than just your words to make me forget the months of blatant disrespect.”

“Don't play around too much now.” The man pulled you back into his embrace. One arm tightly held you by the waist while the other pretended to pull on your ear. For a short moment the two of you laughed together, until he suddenly spoke in a more serious tone.

“Please keep your eyes on me, don't look away.” One of his hands wrapped around yours to pull it up to his face. Hoshina's soft lips ran over your fingers, placing a strong kiss on your hand. Then his eyes fell on yours, locking your gazes.

“I'm yours, Y/n. You don't need anyone else as long as I'm here so please continue to give me your attention. It gets me going like nothing else, hearing your adorable voice and seeing how much effort you put into every fight. Fuck” He chuckled, the other hand now cupping your right cheek.

“You don't know how long I had to hold myself back. But now that the truth's out, I can finally show you just how crazy you make me.”

#yoredoesmore #anime fanfic #hoshina soshiro x reader #requests are open #soshiro hoshina #kaiju no. 8 #x reader #request #hoshina x reader #jealous hoshina

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citrus-moonlight · 3 months ago

Text

As I often do, I've seen a few posts going around lately lamenting the lack of interaction with fanfiction/fanart here on Tumblr as well as AO3, but after reading a particular comment last night I just need to say this:

If someone tells you that the lack of response to sharing their writing is making them feel so upset that they're thinking of quitting writing altogether, don't tell them that's not a good mindset to have and they should just have fun with it and write for themselves. (have you just tried not being sad? you'll feel so much better!)

Even if you're a writer who felt that way once upon a time but then you changed your mindset so that you don't rely on others' feedback for validation and now you're so much happier, that's not helpful. Because that's obviously not what the person who is feeling sad and defeated is able to do right now, and for most writers/creators that's never going to be possible.

And it shouldn't have to be.

Especially here. Especially fanfiction.

Fanfiction is something that's created because someone loves something and wants to share it with others who love the same thing. And this is specifically a fandom space, somewhere that is supposed to be a community where discussion and dialogue can and is encouraged to happen between the people who write and the people who read. So when there's radio silence when you share something in this kind of space, do you really not see how that would be discouraging?

Because of course I write for myself - I would never get anything down on the page if I didn't - but I share because ultimately I want someone else out there to read what I wrote, and with any luck, to get some joy out of it. But if no one tells me they did, how am I supposed to know? As far as I know I've just been yelling into the void. As far as I know, all that work wasn't worth it.

A metaphor I've seen as an example is that it would be like having someone invite you over and cooking an entire delicious, heartfelt meal, you eat it all without saying anything, and then just leave. Do you not see how that would be upsetting?

We put so much of ourselves into what we write, bits of our hearts and souls and the things that we love and are exploring and are interested in or confused about. It's such a vulnerable thing to share something you've created, so when you tell someone that they shouldn't care if someone else reads what they wrote or tells them that they liked it, you're dismissing a very real and valid experience for so many creators out there.

Because regardless of how slow or fast a writer is, or how big or small their fandom is, it's still hard and takes time and energy and dedication and love - all of it in between our day to day lives from the mundanities to the heartbreaks - to even get something to the point where we're comfortable sharing.

Now, I know that not everyone thinks that writers are silly or selfish or entitled when they ask for feedback. Before I started writing again after many, many years, the main reason I didn't really comment on fics very often wasn't because I didn't think that the authors deserved feedback, it was more that I didn't really think that it would matter. That my comments would just be noted - if read at all - and brushed aside and then they would continue on about their day.

I could not have possible been more wrong. You might think you're just one person and it's just one comment but it's amazing how it can turn a day (or week, or month) around. How it can encourage someone to finish a story, or make a connection they'd been struggling with, or even just manage to add 500 words to a WIP. It is truly incredible to hear that someone loved something I wrote, and if you've ever commented on or reblogged one of my fics, please know that it truly means the world to me.

I've gone through a rough time with all of this lately myself, but I'm doing a bit better now (for the moment), so I just wanted to say this, in part to remind myself when it inevitably gets hard again:

If you're reading this, whether you're a friend or you've never seen me on your dash and never will again: I'm sorry it hurts right now. I'm sorry you feel discouraged and lonely, that it doesn't feel like it's worth it anymore, that you're struggling to find a reason to continue.

But I desperately hope that you keep writing. I hope you keep sharing. You're worth it. I know it's hard, and if you don't want to and you're just tired of the cycle of giving so much of yourself and getting so little in return, I understand that, too. It's ok to be in your feelings about it, it's ok to feel drained by it, and even though knowing you're not alone in your experience doesn't change anything and it still sucks, it's normal and valid and there's nothing wrong with you feeling the way that you do.

But I hope that you are able to find the joy in it again, because you deserve it. ❤️

#ok to rb #fanfiction #writing #thoughts and reminders #every writer is incredible #every artist #every gif maker #every single person who submits to the mortifying ordeal of being known #who contributes to their fandom however big or small #deserves to feel that their effort was worth it #support the people who create the things you love #do you want to spread misery or joy?

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moonkissedvisions · 10 months ago

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PAC ♡ 𝐂𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐚 𝐦𝐢𝐫𝐫𝐨𝐫: 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐣𝐞𝐜𝐭 ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*˚˖𓍢ִ໋🌷͙֒✧˚.🎀༘⋆

☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:⠀ *⋆.*:･ﾟ .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆ please read:

Hey! welcome to another reading. This reading includes the following questions, I drew one card for each of them: -How do you see yourself? -How do you think others see you? -How do you project yourself to others? -How can you improve your projection/image? -Who/How are you, really? Use your own intuition and discernment to read my interpretations. Remember that this is a general reading so not everything has to resonate. This reading was only made for guidance and entertainment, it´s not a replacement for professional advice of any kind. I use a Rider-Waite deck and you can ask me about the cards if they aren´t named in the reading. Check out my other readings at the end of this post and consider liking/reblogging/following if you liked this one.

ʚ♡ɞ Now, look for your pile and hope you enjoy it. ʚ♡ɞ

♡ Pile 1

How do you see yourself?

You see yourself as a joyful person who likes to have fun and juggle many things at once. You view yourself as adaptable, dynamic, and fast-paced. You strive to maintain balance in your life. Perhaps you see yourself as someone who is too agitated, trying to keep everything together but struggling with a bit of messiness. You are worried that you can't always solve every problem or you aren't versatile enough. You are practical and you tend to take too much at once, but you know you are good at that.

How do you think others see you?

You believe that others perceive you as a resilient and strong individual who has gone through many challenges in life. You think they see you as a warrior who can endure any obstacle that comes your way. You also believe that you excel at setting boundaries and people recognize your persistence, ability to push forward, durability, and unwavering stance on important matters.

What do you project?

You project that you are struggling emotionally. maybe you suffered from heartbreak recently and that's why others see you struggling. When you experience heartbreak, loss, or betrayal, it can be difficult to hide the impact it has on you. Often, others can sense that you are not feeling your best. This may be due to your facial expressions, gestures, and body language projecting your sorrow, depression, or grief. However, others may also sense that you possess the strength to endure emotional pain and anguish, and that you have the capacity to cope with difficult times and emotions. Despite the challenging circumstances, they can see that you are getting through it.

How can you improve your image?

To build a positive image, focus on developing self-confidence, optimism, and a sense of self-assurance. Recognize your own strengths, resilience, and determination, and celebrate your successes and progress with others. Cultivate a positive self-image by showcasing your talents, achievements, and skills, and don't be afraid to reward yourself for your hard work. By accepting love and attention from others, you can build strong and supportive relationships that will help you achieve your goals and thrive in life. Remember, with dedication and perseverance, you can create a positive image that reflects your true potential and inspires others to do the same.

Who/How are you?

Whether it's in the present, past or an ongoing experience, you may have encountered a sense of loss, betrayal, heartbreak or any other kind of ending that has left you feeling defeated, physically and mentally exhausted, unable to react, powerless, discouraged, and sad. It's a feeling that things have come to an end and a new beginning is approaching. You may feel resigned to this situation, and it may have taken you by surprise. Someone or something may have hurt you deeply, and you may feel like there is nothing you can do about it. But with time, a new beginning will approach, and you'll be able to start your life anew. ♡

♡ Pile 2

How do you see yourself?

You perceive yourself as someone who is often lost in thought, too absorbed in your mind to notice what is happening around you. Perhaps you are moody, bored, or indifferent. You don't seem to experience gratitude or joy for anything in particular. You may overanalyze things and miss out on opportunities as a result. You see yourself as someone who is introspective and contemplative, but you struggle to feel content or fulfilled. You don't have a passion or feel emotionally connected to anything. You may be stuck in a negative/lack mindset and find it difficult to appreciate what you already have.

How do you think others see you?

You believe that others perceive you as a patient, moderate, balanced, and a calm person. You think that people see you as someone who enjoys going on adventures and embracing all kinds of experiences. Additionally, you think that others view you as open-minded, flexible, and capable of accepting diverse opinions and ways of living. You don't consider yourself as a person who thinks in black and white, but rather as someone who avoids extreme points of view. Perhaps you believe that people see you as someone who is not vengeful, holds no grudges, and is diplomatic and stable.

What do you project?

You exude calmness and balance while projecting emotional intelligence and the ability to empathize with people's feelings. You possess the skills to help others with their emotional problems and have the ability to connect with your own emotions and creativity. People feel heard and understood when they talk to you, and you have a reassuring presence that can comfort and uplift them. You healthily express your emotions and are unafraid of being perceived as sensitive or emotional. You have a strong intuition that enables you to read others' emotions accurately and know when someone needs support. You are a loving, artistic, and magnetic individual who is capable of dreaming big and inspiring others with your creativity and passion.

How can you improve your image?

Be ready to unleash your inner child by embracing your childlike wonder and free-spirited personality. Ignite your adventurous side and discover new horizons with an open and curious mind. Don't let a lack of enthusiasm hold you back - break free from routine and indulge your curiosity. Follow what intrigues you. Get out of your head, and look at the bright side. The key to finding your passion is to approach life with a playful attitude and a desire to explore new ideas. Don't take yourself too seriously and don't worry about making sense of everything. You don't need to get attached to something to find it fun. Work on your fears. As you embrace your journey, you'll inspire others to follow your lead and tap into their own sense of wonder. Let humor be your guide and start smiling more as you uncover all the exciting experiences that await you.

Who/How are you?

You possess a reflective, methodical, and calm personality. You are someone who doesn't rush into things and takes their time to contemplate and evaluate the situation before action. You are careful with your work and like to commit yourself fully to it. You are a perfectionist. Your introspective and composed nature allows you to think through things deeply and come up with practical solutions. You value your work and like to reflect on the outcome, which helps you learn from your experiences and grow. You are intellectually practical and don't take any risks without careful planning. You are a patient, dedicated, and meticulous individual who values quality work and likes to appreaciate the fruits of their labor.

♡ Pile 3

How do you see yourself?

You see yourself as someone who possesses a remarkable collaborative personality that enables you to effortlessly blend the energies and abilities of all team members, resulting in outstanding project outcomes. Your ability to work in teams is a testament to your skill and capability. You are focused, dedicated, and driven to succeed, with a good eye for detail and a talent for employing practical skills to achieve your goals. Your meticulous planning and thoughtful consideration of all aspects of a project reflect your reliability and conscientious nature. You are aware of your strong work ethic, combined with your friendly and trustworthy demeanor. You are highly committed to your work, practical, and reliable which inspires confidence in your abilities.

How do you think others see you?

You may feel like others don't fully understand you or perceive you accurately. It's possible that you have an unclear sense of your own identity, or that your identity is constantly changing based on your emotions or what's currently going on in your life. This can make it difficult for others to get a clear picture of who you are, and you may feel misunderstood. You might even feel like you can't be your true self, or that there isn't a true version of you that you can show to people. It's possible that you feel like others see you as fake or delusional, or that they pick up on your insecurities and emotional struggles so their perception of you is clouded by emotional projections. You may worry that you confuse people or that they have false beliefs and wrong ideas about you.

What do you project?

You might unknowingly convey your inner feelings of doubt and unease to those around you. Perhaps you are currently low on energy, and those around you can sense that you are feeling defeated. You might be projecting an absence of assertiveness in your communication and actions, indicating that you are unsure of your ability to win your battles and succeed. It's also possible that you are projecting a lack of confidence in yourself and your boundaries, giving off the impression that you are easily giving up and that you don't stand up for yourself. Maybe others perceive you as someone who starts unnecessary conflicts and behaves recklessly. You may also be projecting a lack of experience and commitment, which could result in you frequently stepping back from challenging situations. Overall, you project insecurity and a lack of motivation.

How can you improve your image?

To improve your image, you must embrace the unknown and uncertainty with boldness, readiness, and vitality. Identify the factors that are holding you back and draining your energy. Instead of wasting your time and focusing on insecurities, learn to be assertive, spontaneous, and willing to take risks. Redirect your focus intelligently. Feel the fear, and do it anyway. Trust in your ability to overcome any challenge that comes your way. Don't hold back your wild side; be authentic and unapologetic. Take care of your health and engage in sports that will help you gain confidence and vigor. Expand yourself and seek ways to grow instead of limiting yourself. Remember, you are capable of achieving anything you set your mind to.

Who/How are you?

You may be currently undergoing a process of healing, or are considering such a journey. You are beginning to view your pain, struggle, and grief in a new light, and as a result, you are experiencing a sense of release from emotional pain. You are starting to feel more peaceful and serene, and you are gaining a deeper sense of self-awareness. You are recovering from a past event that has had a profound impact on you, and you are gaining hope and faith in your healing journey. You are engaging in various forms of emotional release, such as journaling, meditation, or talking to someone. You help others to heal by sharing your own journey. You are attuned to your feelings and learning to experience them, rather than trying to control or over-analyze them. You are someone who is overcoming emotional obstacles and developing a sense of self-acceptance and inner peace. Your journey of healing is a testament to your strength and resilience, and serves as an inspiration to others who may be going through similar experiences.

♡ Pile 4

How do you see yourself?

You appear to be someone who possesses a strong sense of willpower. You are confident in your abilities to manifest your desires and you have all the resources at your disposal to achieve your goals. Your skills and creativity are impressive, and you possess the strategic prowess and focus to make things happen. You also possess a sense of empowerment and cunning, which makes you a natural leader with a flair for innovation.

Your persuasive and analytical abilities have made you a force to be reckoned with, and you are well aware of your power and influence. However, you may have noticed that this energy is not always directed in a positive direction. You may have used your persuasive abilities to manipulate, control, or deceive others, rather than using them to inspire and motivate. Perhaps you have struggled to channel your creativity in a way that benefits yourself and others, and as a result, you may have suppressed it altogether. You may also feel that you lack consistency in your endeavors, which can lead to wasted potential or a lack of progress. You may struggle to be honest and coherent with your thoughts and actions, which can lead to a sense of confusion or frustration. Despite these challenges, you deeply understand that you have the potential to overcome them and tap into your full potential.

How do you think others see you?

You believe that others perceive you as a deep and dynamic individual, characterized by a continual process of transformation and evolution in your life. You feel that they recognize your innate ability to undergo significant metamorphoses and serve as a catalyst for change. You sense that others regard you as someone who wields profound influence, capable of instigating transformative shifts within themselves and their surroundings. You believe that people perceive your resilience and profound depth, viewing you as a revolutionary figure who fosters renewal and facilitates healing processes. You think others see you as a radical person.

What do you project?

You appear to be experiencing a sense of detachment from your expertise and proficiency. You project that your level of engagement with your work has diminished compared to previous times. Your attention and organizational skills seem to be faltering, leaving others with a feeling of uncertainty regarding your reliability and dependability. It appears that practicality eludes you, and you are out of harmony with those around you, resulting in a lack of confidence in your abilities both professionally and in your daily pursuits. Your friends or colleagues may detect a noticeable disconnect, sensing that you are not resonating on the same wavelength as before and that your connection with them has weakened. Don't take this as a further discouraging message. Remember that this is also part of your journey so embrace it, and seek to realign at your own pace. You may be projecting this however it doesn't have to be the truth about you.

How can you improve your image?

Enhancing your image begins with embracing both your triumphs and setbacks, as they are integral parts of your journey toward personal and professional growth. By acknowledging and learning from your experiences, you pave the way for self-improvement and evolution. Make time for introspection, allowing yourself to release any burdens and cultivate gratitude for the lessons learned. Reclaim your power by reframing disappointments as opportunities for growth and resilience. Stay proactive in seeking out avenues for advancement and expansion. Re-center yourself by decluttering not only your physical surroundings but also your mental and spiritual spaces. Through this deliberate process of self-care and empowerment, you position yourself to thrive and radiate confidence in all aspects of your life. Remember that you can't grow new flowers until the old ones have decomposed into soil. Focus on growing new flowers, not in the decomposed old ones.

Who/How are you?

You have a vibrant persona thar radiates humor, making interactions with you a delight. You exude a carefree optimism that uplifts those around you. Your approach to life is characterized by a refreshing lack of attachment to material possessions, opting instead to savor experiences with an insatiable curiosity and boundless enthusiasm. You embrace each moment as an opportunity for joy and discovery. Recognizing the analogy of life to a perpetual celebration, you conscientiously cultivate an attitude of a gracious host, ensuring that every encounter is filled with warmth and vitality. Your capacity to maintain a lighthearted perspective, coupled with an unwavering focus on the bright side of life, reflects a remarkable depth of wisdom and resilience. You have an infectious smile and unforgettable laughter, and you embrace your childlike wonder.

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