#killer vegetables
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Alternative version of Suzy from Tonic Trouble. I think the vegetables are upset because she is smoking.
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Fuck-it Friday
I was going to post with or without being tagged, but ya'll are randy. So thanks, you lovely lovely people, makes me a little sorry for this... @wikiangela, @thewolvesof1998, @forthewolves, @prince-buck-diaz, @panbuckley,
Ya'll ready for this? Cus the fuck in this weeks fuck-it Friday is for fucking Doug up. I present to you my dark buddie fic, Jigsaw Buck.
Doug comes to his senses slowly. The sound of lapping waves and seagull cries muffled, mixed with the static of a lifeless room. Saltwater muddled with rust and mildew has his nose twitching. He smacks his lips together, cotton mouth with the sour taste of stale alcohol and typical morning breath. There’s a subtle throb at his temples, really his whole-body aches, but it’s the tightness at his biceps, wrists, and ankles, that flings him into full awareness. “What the?!” His eyes fly open and dart around the room, taking in his unknown surroundings. Most of the area is dark, except for a few flickering bulbs, their bright white illumination creating a halo-like effect around him. If Doug had to guess, he would say it was one of the many abandoned warehouses on the coastline in what he hoped was L.A. Then Doug notices the dark metal pole stationed right in front of him and the shadowy figure that looms just a few feet away. “Show yourself you son of a bitch!” He screeches, jerking his entire body forward. Doug regrets the motion instantly. Screaming out in agony as his wrist, arms, and ankles are sliced open by previously unnoticed large metal prongs welded into the chair. He can actually hear his blood sloshing to floor from the cuts. And Doug knows he shouldn’t struggle, but his body is entering fight or flight mode, and it’s chosen to fight. The prongs dig deeper, spilling more blood. Rivulets of red liquid run down his arms, more seeps into in his shoes and socks. His stamping foot slips in the small puddle that’s already formed, causing the metal at his ankles to slice up more skin, adding to the mess on the dirty floor. He cries and struggles, and his body becomes further depleted. It seemed like hours when only less a minute has passed before the figure hidden in the shadow steps forward and Doug’s movements halted. No fucking way. “Hey Doug.” Evan Buckley, his vegetative wife’s little brother, completely emotionless. His next words send a shiver fear down Doug’s spine, “I want to play a game.”
Ooooohhh yes kids. Buck is a serial killer, and not just any serial killer, the Jigsaw killer from the Saw films. One that puts his victims in traps and forces them to truly fight for their lives. Do you want to know more? Well than, lets play a game...just ask and answers shall be received.
Tagging: @alyxmastershipper, @911onabc, @911-on-abc, @bekkachaos, @thekristen999, @lizzybizzyzzz, @hippolotamus, @transbuck, @monsterrae1, @ebdaydreamer, @shortsighted-owl, @spotsandsocks, @jesuisici33, @brokenribsdiaz, @try-set-me-on-fire @homerforsure, @sibylsleaves, @honestlydarkprincess, @cowboydiazes @cowboy-buddie @spaceprincessem @heartbeatdiaz
#fuck it friday#my new wip#horror films#saw franchise#911 fox#911 abc#911 fic#buddie#buddie fic#dark buddie#gore#blood#jigsaw buck#serial killer buck#sort of#detective eddie#fucking up doug#vegetative maddie#this is a sad fic#several mcd#come ask me things
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Menance to society #1
Name: Io
They are my oc
Don't be fooled by the innocent face
#animebunny#artists on tumblr#digital art#ibispaintx#my art#oc#this is the face of a killer bella#they did 100 years in jail#they like pineapple on pizza#refused to eat their vegetables
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just finished watching the killer's shopping list and i'd do anything for girlboss mom, fish and part timer
also, if i had a nickel every time that child actor was in a drama with a body on the fridge in the past year i would have two nickels etc etc
#very entertaining and it was just 8 episodes!#honestly saw the misunderstanding with fish's clothes like ten miles away and i'm just happy girlboss mom called bs#but yes they're my girls i love them#also the dad i love how much he loves his wife#a hee also gets love because she's the badass gf#daesung gets some love because he needs a break and for ppl to stop thinking he's suspicious#meat gets some love too for having good intentions and i take away some love for being creepy about it even unknowingly#cosmetics gets love for uniting the town's gossips for the greater good#and vegetables gets all the love because it's been rough for her#great! goodbye#the killer's shopping list
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if i had a nickel for every time a 2gumi imagined up a scenario where kuukou was involved in a plot to stop a strange force from eradicating humanity, i’d have two nickels which isn’t a lot!!! but it’s very strange it’s happened twice lol
#this is vee speaking#hifumi dreaming up killer vegetables that wanted to destroy humanity (and came with a red tomato png that actually emoted lol)#and gentaro writing a fanfic of hitoya’s soul getting swapped with a kyuubi spirit that wanted to destroy humanity lol#both of which kuukou played a part in stopping lol#genuinely why lmao#∠( ᐛ 」∠)_ so whatchu got juto lol??????????? am i getting another nickel???????#lmao and alternatively!!!!!!!!#if i had a nickel for every time kuukou dreamed about aliens i’s have two nickels which still isn’t a lot!!!!!#but can you believe i have two nickels lmao#arb blink once if you’re trying to say something like abstract clues or something or blink twice if you need help LOL#c: kuukou👑
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Sono passati ventisei giorni da quando ho portato a casa la Dionea meglio conosciuta come Audrey II, a parte qualche potatina a foglie che avevano virato su colori decadenti come il giallo e il nero, una costante ansia da "sarò in grado di farla vivere?", Audrey II sta apparentemente bene, ma ha ben tre (3!) future nuove foglie!
Io davanti ai tre nuovi germogli:
#little shop of horrors (origami's version)#(stanno bene pure le piante da pp che sono ancora tutte vive e vegete e in apparente buona salute)#(quasi mi viene da pensare di aver rotto la maledizione della serial killer di piante)#givemeanorigami
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There’s a difference between the “right thing to do” and the actual correct course of action to take and I don’t think anyone on this colonial puritan website actually knows that.
#Morality is relative to the situation.#For example#killing puppies is evil but it’s not evil to kill serial killers and dictators because they’ve already done more harm than you ever will#Just like how vegans protesting the meat industry in developing countries are damning entire cultures to starvation over some cows#while reaping the fruits of the slave labor that said country’s worldwide vegetable exports are reliant on#and poisoning the ground and water with noxious pesticides all because they wanted a high horse and a hill to die on.#If your own sense moral purity gets in the way of doing the actual right thing#Then you’re virtue signaling and you’re not as good of a person as you think you are.#Your hands will never be clean so you might as well do as much good as you can with them.#Fuck off with that Steven universe ass “see no evil” moral code. Get shit done or go home.#(PS: I do not hate vegans but I do hate the self righteous asshole ones. Eat what you want but there’s blood on your hands either way.)
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The Big O and all those tomatoes
it's strange that for millennia primates and our hunter gathering ancestors felt environmental pressure to look for the the ripest of berries ( lots of fruits are poisonous or not nutritious if eaten before ripe). The pressure was so profound that it's even swayed our perception of color. But things being what they are our ancestors seldom if ever found perfect berries ( this one a little to old that one a not quite all the way ripe ). Fast forward to the modern day and thanks to selective breeding of the pimp ( that is what the wild ancestor of the modern tomato is called, Solanum pimpinellifolium because awesome) combined with High Speed international shipping and trading and the modern suburban primate can have perfectly uniform red cherry tomatoes exactly calculated in havest time to ripen when they arrive at the store. However because monkey brain got to monkey that feels to artificial and so our Intrepid bot, oops I mean person, decides instead to purchase a " rainbow assortment " a package of tomatoes of various breeds and harvest times equally calculated so as to give the illusion of random forged fruit.
#fried green tomatoes#Killer tomatoes from outer space#Send in the clones#Tomatoes are only vegetables for tax purposes
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There are always chances of a Panda killing you.
#animalreminders#animal#animals#trees and forests#carrots#panda#cute#curvy and cute#vegetables#killer panda
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Finally a voice of sanity
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One Piece men reaction to you stealing their signature clothes
Characters: Luffy, Zoro, Sanji, Trafalgar Law, Eustass Kid, Killer
Masterlist
Luffy
He is running thru the deck, absolutely nervous and irritated, ¿where is his hat?, he is almost having a panic attack.
Suddently he saw you fishing on the border of the deck with his hat on.
He instantly deflates like a balloon, you two are dating and he ussually lets you use his hat but it's the first you steal it without permission.
He approaches you from behind and wraps his rubber arms around yourself, enough silent to scare you but enough strong to not let you fall.
"Hi captain, how are you doing?"
"I tought my hat disappeared, i was scared, you know it's important to me." his voice sounded a little sad, you must have given him a lot of trouble.
"Sorry gorgeous, i wanted to fish but the sun it's too hot and you were sleeping so i took it, i shouldn't have done that."
"You can take my hat, but please, tell me next time."
"Of course i will, not doing this again, i don't want you to have another rough wake up." you give him a little kiss on the nose, you know he loves it.
"And if you want to fish tell me first, i want to fish with you..." a little of his ussual child behaviour is back.
"But you were sleeping," he hid his face on your neck.
"Then wake me up."
"You don't like that."
"I like it when you do it, and i can always sleep here." he placed his head on your lap and fell asleep again.
Zoro
It was a crazy idea, but you wanted to try it.
You stealed his haramaki while he was sleeping and you had a goal in mind with that.
You were in front of the mirror, trying to clip the haramaki tight enough to make a top for you.
You almost got it, it was starting to look good.
Then the door opened and Zoro appeared with an irritated look.
Then he saw you and his mouth dropped almost to the floor.
"What were you..." he didn't finish the question, instead he was doing hand signals.
"I thought it would look good." you are now blusing, a lot.
"You.... you can't...." it sounded like Zoro couldn't talk properly, that's when you saw he was blushing too, "You look very good on it," he covered his face with his hand.
"Thanks, i am glad you are not mad."
"I am mad but you look pretty, i hope you didn't break it."
"No, i am just clipping it, no sewing." he got behind you and put his hands on your waist.
"I can help, but later i will get a reward for contributing in this model's look." you laughed.
Sanji
He has a set of jewelry which consists on a necklace, a ring and a bracelet.
There are some ocasions that he lets you have one of the three, but you wanted to try it all.
Today he was doing dinner and you hugged him from behind.
You felt him tense but he was still cutting the vegetables, but now at a slower pace.
You were already wearing the ring so you showed it to his face and then got to his neck and unclipped the golden chain.
His breathing was starting to hitch, he isn't sure if he would be able to turn around and ask you what you were thinking.
You put the necklace on you neck and then you move your hand to his wrist.
Now he is completely unable to continue doing his chores.
You uncliped the third item and put it on yourself.
He finally turned around and saw you admiring how his yewelry looks on yourself.
"What are you doing." he was trembling.
"I wanted to see how good they look on me." you showed the ring and bracelet on his face again.
"And you need it to do it like that? mon amour." and then Sanji got a nose bleed and needed to sit down.
Trafalgar Law
He was so inmerse on his book that he didn't sense you enter the room and take his hat from the table.
He told you he couldn't sleep with you that night but you needed to feel him close so you stealed the hat, carefully.
At the end he finished his readings sooner so he got to your bedroom, he was so tired that he didn't noticed he wasn't wearing his hat.
The surprise came when he got to your side and saw his hat on you.
He blushed a lot, almost tripped, you looked so cute in his eyes.
He is not the one to think someone is cute but you always manage to make him flustered.
He wanted to wake you up and kiss you but after some thinking, he realize he is too tired to do it, so he waited to next morning.
When you woke up you were really surprised, Law tends to sleep on his side of the bed keeping distance from you, but this night he was trapping you with his arms.
You were unable to leave his embrace, but you aren't complaining about it.
Eustass Kidd
You were really cold, the winter island was giving you a hard time.
So you took his coat to get out of the ship to do some shopping.
When you came back his yellings were audible from miles away, apparently he tought someone was making jokes on him.
When he saw you getting on the deck with his red coat, he almost choked.
He really liked seeing you with his coat (his nose almost bleed) but he needed to keep his reputation.
He yells at you trying to discipline you on public (not to much).
When you both got into your room he tried to make it up.
"Don't think i will forgive you." you said while laying on bed.
"I have a reputation, but i didn't meant to be so rude."
"i am not hearing an apology."
"Sorry." He is red as a tomato.
"Good boy." you patted his head carefully while his arms embrace you.
"It suited you very well." you laugh when he hid is face on your chest.
Killer
Another heart attack, he never goes outside without his helmet, so when he wakes up and couldn't find it, he starts to anxious.
Early enough he discovers that you are on the bathroom cleaning it, repainting it and fixing it.
When he opened the door it was like you both became deers looking at car lights.
You were sure he was going to be mad at you but seeing someone being so preoccupied with his favourite.
"You could have said something:"
"I wanted it to be a surprise, plus this thing is nasty as fuck." his big muscular arms went to your waist.
"Thanks." he rubbed his head to yours and lowered himself for you to put the helmet on him.
"No." you pated his blonde hair, "this thing is still wet, so you have to wait."
"Kid is going to kill me if im late."
"Don't worry, we can manage to dry it fast."
#one piece imagine#one piece x reader#one piece#one piece x you#roronoa zoro x you#roronoa zoro imagine#roronoa zoro x reader#roronoa zoro#trafalgar law imagine#trafalgar law x reader#trafalgar law#trafalgar law x you#eustass kid x reader#eustass captain kid#eustass kid#eustass kid imagine#eustass kid x you#sanji x you#sanji x reader#sanji imagine#black leg sanji#vinsmoke sanji#massacre soldier killer#killer imagine#one piece killer#killer x reader#killer x you#vinsmoke sanji x you#vinsmoke sanji x reader#vinsmoke sanji imagine
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HOLD YOUR BREATH (s.jy)
pairing: detective!jake x reader (f)
summary: not having seen your husband’s face in two days, you decide to bring him dinner and check up on him— sleep deprived and stressed, he can’t help but get a taste of you.
warnings: 1960s au. mentions of murder, unprotected sex (don’t be silly, wrap your willy!), pussy eating, pussy drunk jake (r we even surprised), semi-public sex, choking, p in v, jake is a detective, jake wears glasses, sex on desk, dirty talking, pet names (baby, love, darling), wall sex, breeding kink, cream pie, lmk if more. NOT PROOFREAD.
wc: 3.7k
published: 11th June 2024
taglist: (permanent) @stolasisyourparent @jaeyunsbimbo @heelvsted @jwnghyuns @seunghancore @bangtancultsposts s @shawnyle (oneshot) @kirinaa08 @immelissaaa @skzenhalove @anittamaxwynnn @honeybunnee @cherlv
a/n: based on this ask from anon! sorry if it took me a while to prepare it, hope you like it tho <3 please LIKE & REBLOG!
Being a detective in the 60s wasn’t easy at all. With all the danger occurring and newly killers all walking around, trying to take lives as if they were useless, you couldn’t help but bite your nails as you waited for Jake at home.
But being a detective’s wife was even more difficult. The constant dread fuelling your heart until it was too heavy to carry.
One late Friday night, you were sitting by the kitchen table all alone. The warm June air hitting your skin since you left your window open, watching as the sun was beginning to set.
You had already deep cleaned the whole apartment, probably not even a single crumb of dust was left.
Then, you rearranged the books on the shelves.
In the morning, alphabetically and in the afternoon from the oldest to the newest. Ridiculous.
Utterly bored, you had even painted your nails of a weird shade of green that matched your favourite blouse-skirt set.
You weren’t even being dramatic, given the fact that your only company hadn’t shown his face at home for two days.
Date a detective, they said. It’ll be fun, they said.
It was everything but fun or entertaining, since you spent most of the time alone, due to his crazy schedules.
But you loved Sim Jake too dearly to even consider confronting him about it.
You heard a few stories about old ladies’ nieces at the hair salon you worked who got forced into marriage and you were so glad it hadn’t happened to you.
Because you knew it, bet your heart on it that Jake would always choose you first.
You glanced at the clock that ticked half past seven and like the perfect wife you were, you began to wonder if Jake was even taking care of himself. Had he eaten enough? Had he even eaten at all?
So, rolling up your sleeves, you cooked a delicious meal to bring him to his workplace. Inside the small lunch box was some warm miso soup and vegetables for his big, sexy brain.
Repressing the shiver that ran through your spine when you stepped out of your house and immediately spotted a ‘Missing Person’ sign, you started walking down the familiar road. You just thanked the sun was still high enough to bring some natural source of light.
You reached his office when it was dark already, having walked almost one hour away. Cursing the heels you forced yourself to wear even as your feet screamed for help, you knocked on the door.
The new detective Jake introduced you at a dinner showed up, bright smile and innocence plastered on his face “Hello! Miss Sim.”
You smiled back “Good evening, Mister Kim.” Sunoo stepped aside from the door “Looking for Detective Sim?”
You hummed as you took in the sight of the very dark hallway “Third door on the left, is that right?”
Sunoo nodded happily, “You remembered.” He then placed one hand on the side of his mouth to whisper “But I warn you, he’s not in the brightest mood.”
Oh goodness. “Thank you for the information.” You said as you walked away, to the door that led to your husband’s office.
Softly knocking on the door, you waited for his response, and when his grumpy “What?” From the other side, you decided to open the door.
And there your husband was, his hair sticking to every direction while his glasses almost fell down his nose bridge.
Jake was playing billiards, leaning against the table as he desperately tried to get in the ball. A simple task that seemed not to work for him, since he looked so distressed.
A cigar balanced between his upper and bottom lip, its smoke lingering in the air.
When his chocolate brown eyes finally settled on your figure, they softened in a way that made your heart skip a beat.
“Y/N.” Jake breathed out, placing down the pool stick on the table and walking towards you as you closed the door “What are you doing here?”
“I brought you dinner.” You raised the lunch box in your hand, smiling “Figured you might need it.”
His brows knitted, a frown appearing on his face “You walked here all alone?” He glanced at the clock that ticked nine already “It’s dangerous, baby.” Don’t let yourself be fooled by the sweet nickname, his tone was low and rather pissed.
Being in contact with crime most of his day, Jake grew very protective of you, and directly imposed that you wouldn’t go out without him — or any male friend — after six pm.
You shook your head and let out a small sigh “I’m here, aren’t I?” You said as you walked towards his desk to place down the lunch box.
“Besides, I haven’t seen you in a while.” You tilted your head, resting your back on the table “Haven’t you missed me?”
“Christ, Y/N.” He walked toward you right away, closing the space you had put “I missed you like crazy.”
He dropped his head low and sighed tiredly “But there has been another murder and we can’t figure out who the culprit is. I’m in deep-sea here.”
You gently cupped his cheek in your small palm and rubbed your thumb “Maybe you should take a break?” You suggested “Working too hard fries your brain.”
Jake nodded “Maybe I should.” He murmured and looked behind his shoulders “Wand to play pool?”
You grimaced “You know I can’t play that game.” His lips twitched into a smile wrapping a strong arm around your waist. "I could teach you." He told you, lowering his head and brushing his lips against your ear.
You placed your hands with your newly polished nails on his clothed chest, right under his shoulders "I'm afraid I'm a lost case at this game, even for the greatest detective in town."
Jake chuckled lowly and tilted his head to press his lips against your own, sliding a hand downward to grip your thigh. He parted his lips, slipping his tongue into your mouth and tilting you backwards in between his body and the desk.
Jake took the opportunity to grip your thigh and spread it apart, too eager to even care about having a make out session first. He slipped his hand under your skirt and groaned when he felt your folds right under his fingers.
"Goodness, you didn't seem to be wearing anything." Jake mumbled against your lips before trailing his own down your jawline and to your neck.
His fingers pressed against your core and he groaned lowly, sliding his fingers across your entrance.
You let out a quiet gasp at the feeling and let out a small chuckle before his fingers delved deeper inside of you, moving in and out of your wetness while kissing across your jawline.
"You seem quite needy already, love." He mumbled with his gravelly voice. You grasped the back of his head and rested your forehead on his, your eyes never leaving his.
He kissed the tip of your nose, such a gentle gesture in contrast to the filthy thing he was doing to your body, the sound of your slickness pooling down your thighs and on his wrist filled the room— until it was interrupted by a knock on the door.
Cursing under his breath for not having locked the door when you first came in, and not having foreshadowed his fingers deep inside you, he pressed a finger on his lips to shush you. “Who is it?” He then asked.
“Detective Sim?” Someone’s voice came from the other side “The captain wants to speak with you, sir.”
He was about to turn the doorknob when Jake said “Busy at the moment.”
The other detective stepped back from the door but didn’t walk away. “It’s important.” He said bluntly.
You thought that at those words, Jake would leave you there on the table and go doing his job, instead he curled his finger inside of you, making you press a hand on your mouth to middle a moan.
“You can tell me from there.” The detective began speaking and Jake looked down at you, his eyes darkened as he continued to move his fingers in a circular motion inside of you. "Keep quiet, mh?" He whispered to you, his tone smug.
You let out a shaky breath and grasped his forearm, doing your best to not let out any noise.
He let out a low chuckle, curling his fingers again to draw a moan from you. "Shh, you have to be quiet." He whispered and the detective continued to speak.
Not like you could focus on what he was saying with the way his fingers worked you closer to the edge.
“About the murder cases we were working on…” The detective said, “I have an update.”
Jake tilted his head at the mention of the case and kept his fingers moving inside you. "And what is the update?" He called out, not letting up his movements at all.
You couldn’t take it anymore and tried to remove his wrist, "Detective Park found a similarity with the other two murders, seems like the culprit puts a small signature."
Jake ignored your piss-poor attempt to stop him as he continued to talk to the detective with a nonchalant tone.
"What sort of signature?" He questioned, a smirk on his lips while he continued his movements with a particular curling of his fingers.
Your legs shook as he kept hitting your sweet spot “He cuts the ring finger's nail of all the victims." The detective informed him.
Upon hearing the information Jake's eyes widened slightly before moving his sight back down to you. His fingers continued their ministrations, drawing more tremors from your body though his mind was working at the new information revealed to him.
Not hearing any reaction from the inside, Jake’s colleague added “Detective park said to find him when you aren't... busy?” He cleared his throat and for a second you thought he guessed what was happening “I'll tell him you'll talk to him later?"
Your husband hummed lowly as he thought back to the information, continuing to work his fingers in and out of you as if it helped him think. "Yes, I will come talk to him after." He told the detective with a steady voice, his eyes taking in your expression while his gaze darkened.
With the dismissal, the person’s steps went away until they completely disappeared. Jake smirked and moved his fingers faster, curling on your g-spot.
He lowered his head, pressing his lips against the side of your neck and up to your earlobe. "Just a little more, love." He whispered in your ear.
You moaned shakily, now finally able to let it out. You wrapped one arm around his neck to steady yourself as the other rested behind you.
You clenched around his two digits, the knot in your stomach tightening.
Jake let out a soft growl in your ear, his fingers curling against your sweet spot. "Not yet, wait." He demanded.
“W-what?” You frowned, unable to stop the euphoria creeping in “Why?”
Jake smirked against your ear "I'm not done with you yet, love." he mumbled huskily before taking your lobe in his mouth and sucking on it.
His fingers worked you until another moan nearly escaped your lips and he took that opportunity to capture them in his own "Quiet, you don't want anyone to hear you being a noisy little thing, do you?"
You shook your head as you threw it back, your hair dangling in the air and eyes squeezing. You bucked your hips to meet his hand, his palm rubbing against your clit.
Jake titled his head at the sight, looking ever so gorgeous. He added a third digit inside of you, but it stretched you so good to the point of pain. You couldn’t help but whimper out loud.
Jake chuckled at your reaction and his tongue delved between your lips when you whined, muffling your sounds. "Shh, you're being too loud, baby." He bit your bottom lip.
You clenched around his digits, walls taking them in “T-too much.” You murmured.
He hummed lowly and slowed his pace slightly, bringing one arm to grip your waist again. "You can handle it, can't you, baby?" Hequestioned as his fingers began to curl against your sensitive spot to ease your discomfort.
At the feeling, so full and good, you rolled your eyes to the back of your head “T-there.” You moaned helplessly “Keep going.”
“Be quiet for me.” He demeaned and curled his fingers at a speed you weren’t even sure was possible.
You looked down at where your bodies collided and couldn’t help but let out a moan, your slickness was pooling down his wrist onto the floor, making a whole mess.
Jake followed your gaze and smirked at the sight, “You like this? Mh?”
You nodded “Yes, Jake.” Your eyes were half lidded as you felt the knot in your stomach tighten “Like it. So good.”
Jake titled your chin up to meet his dark eyes and raised a brow, your walls sucking his digits in “Are you close, baby?”
Like the expert of your body that he was, he knew all the signs to pick up. “Yes— I’m so—“ You couldn’t even finish your sentence, that one particular curl on the spongy wall made your body shake in release.
Jake’s arms wrapped around you, holding your body against his as you quaked, “Good girl." He mumbled in your ear, his fingers continuing their work until you came down from your high.
He pressed a soft kiss to your jawline, his fingers slowly pulling out of and he smirked as they came out slick with your release. "You were so good for me, darling." he mumbled against your ear.
He pulled his fingers to his mouth and sucked them, he hummed “Love the taste of you.”
Jake gently gave your arm a light squeeze before moving you to the side. You watched him through puzzled eyes until you saw him pushing on the floor all of his files.
“Baby?” You asked and he only replied with a smile. He pressed his lips against your neck, sucking and biting on the soft flesh while he moved his hands to the back of your thighs.
“Now..." He mumbled as his hands gripped your thighs, lifting you up.
You widened your eyes when you noticed how he placed you on the desk and rested your thighs on his shoulders, kneeling in front of you “There we go.”
“J-jake?” You asked, looking down at him. He winked at you “Just relax." He mumbled softly as his lips began to trail across your thighs.
Your body twitched at the feeling, his featherlight kisses sending waves of pleasure.
Jake trailed his lips up until they were close to your core, his breath fanning against your sensitive skin.
“Wait.” You tried to stop him by pressing one hand on his hair. “You haven’t been touched yet.”
He chuckled again, looking back up at you from his position in between your legs. "Don’t worry about me, love. This is about you." He whispered, blowing on your pussy.
You rolled your eyes back and Jake took the opportunity to swipe his tongue slowly on your core, tasting your juices and your previous cum.
“Oh, Lord.” You moaned out, grasping his hair into your hand, knuckles almost white.
He hummed as the taste of you hit his tongue, drawing a low groan from him.
Your breath grew heavy, slowly guiding his head to lick in the spots you were the most sensitive.
“You taste wonderful, love.” He whispered, sucking on your clit.
You unconsciously bucked your hips, not in control of your body anymore as it succumbed to the pleasure.
Jake chuckled and pressed a hand on your hip, pinning it down to keep you from moving while his tongue continued circles against your sensitive spot. "Stay still for me, darling." He mumbled, continuing his movements.
You arched your back and grasped his hair and he could tell that you were already close to the edge.
So, he took the opportunity to slide his tongue in your entrance, making you moan out as the warm and spongy feeling made your whole mind black out.
His eyes never left your expression as he watched you closely. He was enjoying making you squirm, moaning out his name.
And just like thunder crashing, your body shuddered while you squirted right on Jake’s face.
You widened your eyes, unable to stop the overwhelming feeling of pleasure as you basically screamed-moaned. At that point, you were sure even people on the streets knew what you two were up to.
However, Jake seemed very content with it. He wiped his face with the sleeve of his suit. “Pussy so good, makes my day better.” Your liquid was dripping down his glasses and jaw.
“I made a mess.” You whispered, propping yourself up on your elbows “And?” Jake raised a brow, pulling your chin in a kiss. You could taste yourself on his tongue “I love your messes.”
“I want to help you.” You stated, palming his angry hard-on “You already made me cum twice.”
“We don’t have protections.” He murmured, kissing your lips once, then twice “I don’t want inconveniences to happen.”
The thought of him breeding you made your mind fill with primal urges, but you tried to negotiate “You can pull out.”
Jake shook his head, resting it on your shoulder “I don’t have self control when it comes to you.” He kissed your clothed shoulder.
“A blow?” You questioned, caressing the little hair he had behind his head. Jake chuckled again, “I’m too rough and I don’t want to ruin your cute attire.”
His gaze travelled down to your hand that helped you hold yourself up and smiled “You put nail polish on? It suits you.”
How he managed to make your heart flutter after literally having you shake, you weren’t sure. Maybe he had a talent.
“I wanted to be pretty for you.” You chuckled, “Can’t ruin your reputation.”
No matter how much Jake tried to talk you out of sex in his office, the way he was slowly rutting his hips on your inner thigh gave him away.
He occasionally let out small hums in between his words, and you knew damn well he must be feeling so pained.
So, you slowly climbed down the desk and looked at him. He showed you a nice smile, oblivious to the contorted plants you had in mind. His lips dropped into a frown at the same moment your skirt dropped to your ankles.
“Y/N?” He asked, raising a brow as you began to unbutton your blouse, showing your silk bra.
If Jake had one weakness apart from eating you out, then it was your boobs. He loved them, worshipped them day and night.
His eyes darkened at such sight, walking towards you right away and pushing you against the wall.
“You drive me insane.” He whispered, unzipping his pants and letting them drop to the floor “You fuck my head.”
You watched him with excitement bubbling your stomach, he gripped your bare thigh and raised your leg until it was around his waist.
You looked down at his hard cock, pressing against your stomach “Watch me stretch this pussy out.” He said as he aligned himself with your entrance and thrusted inside of you.
You were so wet and sensitive, your skin burning against his. Jake gripped your ass so tight it would surely leave a mark by the next day, he rutted his hips inside of you at a fast speed.
“I don’t think I’ll last long.” He warned, “I feel you much better without a condom.”
You clenched around his length as his admission, making him groan. He pulled you into a heated kiss as he kept moving his hips, desperately chasing the relief he longed for.
“Fuck.” He breathed out, grip on your skin painful “Fuck, you were made for me.”
With one skilled hand, he undid your bra and palmed your breasts, his tip hitting your cervix, making you moan.
Jake lowered his head onto your chest and began sucking on your nipple, circling his tongue around it “Ah, Yes!” You chanted out.
Without missing a beat, Jake changed tit and did the same thing to the other.
“So deep.” You moaned, squeezing your eyes shut as the familiar feeling of euphoria reached you for the third time “So good.”
“Yes baby,” He grunted, one hand sneaking up to wrap around your neck “You’re so good for me, so good.”
The sudden loss of air made you clench around him, your walls hugging his cock, sucking him in.
“Fuck— Stop clenching like that.” He huffed, squeezing his eyes just like you did “I’m already so close.”
“I don’t want you to pull out.” You placed one hand on his cheeks, brown eyes boring into yours “What?”
“I want you to cum inside of me.” A rather deep thrust “Your babies, I want them, I don’t care.”
“Oh goodness.” Jake grunted, his hips moving almost manically “You’ll be the death of me.”
You pulled him into a kiss which wasn’t exactly one, you two were just moaning and breathing into each other’s mouths.
“Are you sure, love?” He asked, drops of sweat coating his forehead, his bangs sticking to it “We can’t undo this.”
“I’m so sure.” You moaned out “Cum inside of me.”
At those words, Jake shot his load deep inside of you, filling you up with his warm seed.
You whimpered, grasping his forearm when the orgasm hit you as well, making you clench around him.
He held you against the wall, both of you trying to catch your breaths.
You smiled and removed one bang from his eye, caressing his cheek with your thumb “This was the craziest shit I’ve ever done.”
You slowly rocked your hips, needing to feel him more, needing his cum to stay inside of you.
Jake groaned and rested his forehead on yours “Damn baby, if this is how it’ll end up every time you visit, I hope you do it more often.”
#enhypen#enhypen smut#enhypen fics#enhypen au#enhypen hard thoughts#enhypen hard hours#enhypen x reader#sim jake#jake hard thoughts#jake hard hours#sim jake aus#sim jake hard thoughts#sim jake hard hours#sim jake smut#jake smut#sim jaeyun smut#jake x reader#sim jake x reader#sim jaeyun fics#sim jaeyun x reader#jaeyun x reader#sim jaeyun hard hours#sim jaeyun scenarios#jake scenarios#jake enhypen#enhypen jake#sim jake enhypen#sim jaeyun enhypen#jaeyun enhypen#sim jake scenarios
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"Uh, yeah? No problem?" He eyes the plate of corn like it's going to sprout legs and attack him at any moment. He straightens up, attempting to look casual. Or a decent attempt at it. "It's uh, nice to be here?"
Damn nerves getting in the way of things.
❝ Thank you for visiting, I am very honored. ❞ She sets a plate of corn on the table. it might have some salt sprinkled on it, but that's all it has. It barely looks cooked. ❝ I made you some corn. ❞
#//fdgbfhdgh#//rip jun she's come across the one guy that doesn't like vegetables all that much#//he's going to hide it in a plant or drop it into a portal when she's not looking bfhdbhdf#he's a killer queen... {ic}#angelfate
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🖤🖤🖤
Characters : Art the Clown (Terrifier), afab!reader
Warnings/CW : kinda slowburn, Art almost kills you on purpose, funny stuff, rough smut, wall sex, spanking, hair pulling, overstimulation, choking, pussy slapping, oral (f! Receiving), multiple orgasms, you pass out mid sex, Art is stumped and confused, you're ok tho, talks about blowjobs, bit of fluff at the end, tell me if I missed anything
A/N : I have nowhere to go this Halloween ☹️ just stay home, write and take photos of myself
Its around midnight, you're in your kitchen cooking dinner. Usually you don't cook at midnight but you were busy all day and it just got pushed back. Plus, your boyfriend wasn't home yet. The infamous Mikes County Killer, Art the Clown. He was taking his usual time out there, spilling blood, guts, and pain, while you were home, working or being lazy.
You're surprised your still up with this much energy. You did wake up really late today, since you didn't have work that day. You took that time to organize the house, clean everything up, shower, maybe even trim your hair with a pair of random scissors you prayed didn't belong to Art- knowing what he does with them- and knowing that although he has okay hygiene, he doesn't properly clean his weapons like at all.
You switch between mixing and checking on the red rice, stirring the big pan of cooking chicken, stirring the smaller pan of cooking beef, and finally stirring the pan of cut up bell peppers, broccoli, corn, and onion. The rice finished cooking and so did the vegetables- the chicken and beef still needed some time- when Art busted through your front door, a scowl on his face, his leg and torso cut up a bit from (what you can only guess) a victim fighting back, and blood all over him. He drops his bag of weapons and goes to find you, the scowl not leaving his face.
That expression would've terrified anyone. But really, you were used to it. The more logical side of your brain knew it was only a matter of time before he treats you like any other victim of his; scalping, cutting, drugging, stabbing, torturing. But you decided to just play along with him. Maybe if you act nice and continue to treat him like this, he'll make your death less brutal. Hopefully. But truly you don't know. Nobody but him knows what's going on in his head. He's like a wild animal; sometimes you can get close and they look still- froze- waiting for you to get close and closer, before they pounce on you and attack. Brutally attack.
Art stands by you, not really doing anything but standing with the scowl on his face, staring at you. You smile and wave up at him, giving him a little "Hi baby", before turning your attention back to the food. There was silence, the only thing making noise being the food cooking.
You feel something cold on the back of your neck. You look up at Art and in the corner of your eye, you see his hand outstretched behind your neck. You can't really tell what it is he has but you will admit, it's scarring you. You tried not to show it though. You know Art loves when his victims show fear. If he has thoughts of killing you, fear will only fuel it.
He lowers his hand while you watch. Now you can see what he had pressed against you. A knife- which is probably the least painful object he owns for killing. You again, tried to show now fear. Your eyes didn't widen and your breathing stayed like before. But your heart is beating faster. That's something you can't control. You just showed confusion. Art drops the knife onto the floor- thankfully missing his and yours feet- and turn around, leaving and disappearing into your bedroom.
Once he leaves, you sigh. What the fuck was that? This isn't the first time he's pressed a weapon against you but it still shakes you up everytime. And maybe that's what he wants. You bend down and pick up the knife, throwing it in the sink. You continue cooking, acting like your boyfriend didn't just hold a knife against you.
You taste test everything, ensuring that everything's thoroughly cooked. When the taste is up to your standards, you go to turn off the stove. As your reaching for it, you hear a loud "honk" right in your ear. You jump and turn around, more terrified than when he held a knife to your neck. Art is there, now fully cleaned of blood, and silently laughs. Hard. And buckles over in laughter and pointing at you. He then puts a hand of his heart and mocks your shocked expression and the way you jumped. You bend over the counter, holding your head and laughing too.
Art comes over and grabs a hold of your waist, wrapping both arms around you and lifting you up. He swings you around a bit and kisses your neck. You laugh as he does, now forgetting about the past incident. "Baby-" you laugh. Art perks up and looks at you. "Go sit at the dinner table, I'll bring out your dinner." Art rolls his eyes and gives you once last squeeze before he lets go and slumps over to his spot on the dinner table.
You serve two plates; Art has some chicken, beef, rice and vegetables, which yours has the same but less beef. You bring out his plate first, setting it in front of him and kissing him on the lips. And go back to get your plate and when you come back and set your plate down across Art, you notice his vegetables are gone from his plate and... on the floor, a very thin, useless napkin covering them.
"Babe." Now it's your turn to scowl at him. Art was some of the beef in his mouth. He looks up at you, dumbfounded. "Why the shit is your food on the floor?" Art shrugs and looks around at the floor around him and looks puzzled, like he's pretending the food on the floor doesn't exist. "Art." You glare at him and he just looks like he doesn't know what you're talking about, doing hand movements to tell you you're crazy.
You opened your mouth to speak but Art held up a finger, shushing you. He points to the beef and then his arm, his eyes questioning. "What?" He does the same again. You shrug, looking confused. Art rolls his eyes like you're the dumb one and points to the beef and then to you and him. "I dont-" Art rolls his eyes harder, throwing his body back in dramaticness too. He points to the beef again, and shrugs, looking at you like it's so obvious to know what he's trying to ask you.
"What is it??" You ask, trying to guess what he's trying to say. Art nods, happily and relieved that you finally got it. "It's beef. It's cow." You say and start eating, taking a bite of the chicken. Arts grin is quickly wiped off his face and he slumps. "What?" You ask and eat. Art does a handmovement to say "oh nevermind" and he starts eating. "I'm not cooking human, Art. Don't even think about it." You scold and Art mocks you in response. You just roll your eyes and eat, forgetting the vegetables on the floor.
🖤🖤🖤
After dinner, you two clean up the kitchen. Art washes the dishes while you put the dishes in the sink and wiping down the counters and sweeping the floor. You have music on, singing along as Art bops his head dances a little to the music.
After cleaning, you two go to your shared bedroom. As soon as your door closes, you pounce on Art. You wrap your arms around his neck and smash your lips against his. Almost like he was expecting it, Art instantly grabbed onto you and kissed you back, using tongue and gripping onto your pajamas.
Art pushes you against the wall, his hands still gripping your hips. Your hands reach behind his back and zipped down the zipper on his clown suit. Art starts peeling off your clothes until you're completely naked. You pull off arts clown fit until he's naked too, just his facepaint and mini tophat on.
Art flips you over so you're pressed against the wall. You open your legs a bit and Art grabs your asscheeks, opening them apart and angling his dick with your pussy. He spits on his dick and slowly slips into you, his hands moving to your hips. You let out a soft moan and press your cheek against the wall, looking back at him. Your full body is against the wall, your ass poking out a little.
Art starts slamming his hips against you, his pace getting rougher and rougher. Your body jolts and you moan louder. With every thrust, your thighs slap against the wall. Art reaches around your neck. He wraps his bare hand around the front of your neck and he flips you two over. His back lays against the wall, one hand on your hips as he continues to thrust into you. He pulls your head back by your neck, squeezing a little. Your hands reach back and grab onto his legs as his pace becomes almost unhuman.
Art slaps your ass hard as he does, grinning at your yelp in response. He trails is hand down, roughly grabbing your tits, then trailing fully down to your hip. He pushes down on your back to make you bend over and his other hand grabs a fistful off your hair and pulls your head back. Art grabs your thighs with the hands that was once on your back and opens your legs more. He then grabs your hand and places it on your pussy, and you start mastutbating yourself. All the while his pace stays harsh and rough like usual.
After a while you warn Art of your upcoming orgasm, to which he replies by slapping your ass harshly a couple more times until you cum on his dick; your fingers still circling your clit and Arts pace not faltering. Art abruptly stops his movements, planting himself balls deep into you. He lets go of your hair, his hands just resting on your hips. You slowly stand up straight again. Art grabs the hand you used to pleasure yourself with, pressing it against his lips and into his mouth, licking your juices off your fingers. His other hand pulls your hair back. He slowly turns to look at you, a grin on his face, and he dives in to kiss your lips.
He lets go of you and peels you off his dick, walking you to the bed and pushing you on your back, onto the bed. Art opens your legs, kneeling between them. He uses his fingers to massage your clit for a while before he raises his hand up and slaps your pussy. Not too hard but enough to sting. When he hears you moan and watches your legs jolt, he does it again. And again. And again. And again, till your pussy was wetter and red.
Art stops slapping you, then leans down and starts roughly eating your pussy. You moan loudly and wiggle a little as he does. He forces your legs open and keeps them there as he makes out with your pussy. You grab his head and push it closer to you, his large nose pressing against your clit.
You grind against his face until you cum on his face and he keeps eating you out. Your body spasms. He finally pulls away and licks his lips, standing up again. He lines his dick up with your pussy, instantly pludging himself into you and his expression contorts at the feeling. He starts moving his hips again, fast.
You cry out in overstimulation, your nails digging into his arms as his hands grip your hips tightly. A single tear runs down your face. Art sees this a grins, enjoying the pleasure- and pain- he's giving you. He licks the tear, biting your cheek a little before he comes back up. Your legs shake and tremble and your face looks disheveled. But Art loves when your helpless like this with him. Because of him.
Art winks down and at you and blows you a kiss. He then slams into you, hard, and stays there for a second, balls deep inside you. Then he does it again. And again. And again. He grins wider and wider with every moan you scream out.
He then wraps his hand around your neck, tightly, and starts up his fast, rough pace into you. Your hands claw at his arm as he chokes you, but not too hard. Well... not at first at least. After a couple more minutes, and a couple more orgasms pulled from you, he grips your neck tighter. Your face is now redder than it's ever been.
Art slams into you, cumming inside you, his grin not leaving his face, his eyes shifting from your eyes to your pussy. Even after he came, he kept going, moving fast like before. Like he had all the energy in the world. He squeezed a little tighter at your neck for a second, cutting your airways for only a second before he let you breath again as he fucked you.
Your body slowly became more and more limp, your eyes getting loopy and your heart racing. Your moans start getting fainter and quieter, which makes Art falter a bit but he doesn't stop. Seconds later your body goes limp and your eyes close. You passed out. Whether that be from the choking or from the overstimulation, you don't know. You just know you knocked out.
🖤🖤🖤
You woke up minutes later, now laying against a pillow on the bed. You have a blanket over your still-naked body and the ceiling fans on. You see Art sitting next to you on the bed, now in sports shorts and a T-shirt. He's looking down at you as you wake up, and you have a feeling he's been like that for the whole time you've been asleep.
Art has confusion and... fear in eyes. Fear for Art is rare. Rarer than rare. Someone like Art is never scared. Confused yes, he's sometimes confused, but not scared. He's watched you almost cut a finger off while cooking and his eyes looked more hungry and like he was holding back than scared for your life. But now he's scared. There's finally some human emotion in his eyes.
You two don't do anything but stare at eachother for some time. Didn't Art almost kill you when he got home? Why does he look worried now? It's like he's not even blinking.
Arts tilts his head, looking down at you. He slowly inches his hand to your neck, lightly touching the red marks of his hand left behind. You turn on your side, smiling tiredly as you look up at him. Art touches your face and raises his eyebrows, still confused on why you just knocked out mid sex. "Ya kno-" you stop talking when you hear your own voice. It's very very raspy. You clear your throat and go to talk again. That didn't help. Still raspy. But you talked anyway.
"A girl can only take so much, baby." You laugh. Art rolls his eyes and mocks you. He's back to his usual self. "Whaat??" You laugh again and wrap your arms around his waist. Art ruffles your already-messed-up hair, grinning down at you playfully again.
"Maybe if I wake up first tomorrow, I'll wake you up with a blowjob." You rub your elbow on his crotch and he instantly gets hard again. You get off him and lay back on the bed. He looks down at you with a frown. "Tomorrow." You remind him. Art huffs and rolls his eyes, getting into bed with you. You two sleep, clinging onto eachother.
🖤🖤🖤
HAPPY HALLOWEEN
#fanfics#x reader#female reader#gn reader#smut#art the clown#art the clown x reader#art the clown x you#terrifer 3#terrifier#terrifier 2
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You take it upon yourself to spice up your husband's work lunches at Rebecca's encouragement, and Leon nearly dies in the process. Is Hello Kitty really a killer? Leon, for one, is convinced she's up to no good.
f / m, you're married to older leon!, crack treated seriously, fluff, slice of life, the dso is just one big happy family because i said so, bento boxes and happy ending but maybe not for chris (i still love my peanut buster king)
word count: 1.4k // read on ao3
a/n: inspired by rrcherrypie's hello kitty bento box video that i watched religiously as a kid. this entire fic is a shitpost tbh LMAO this is my government mandated apology for a story where no one goes anywhere <3 go check it out if you haven't yet!
Ever since his cop days, Leon’s learned that you can’t trust anyone whose hands aren’t in plain sight and well, Hello Kitty’s emblazoned face staring up at him from the kitchen counter doesn’t exactly have hands. Or arms.
Leon scrunches his nose at her and opts to wrap his own arms around your waist instead.
“Doll.”
“Hm?”
Leon lines the side of your neck with kisses as carrot coins and cucumber slices fall serenely away at your knife.
“Whatcha doin’?” he prods.
You neatly sweep the vegetables into the Hello Kitty bento box and give your attention-hungry husband a kiss to tide him over, but it’s not quite enough to satiate. Octopus sausages stare back at him with pointy sesame seed eyes, and Leon grows more unsettled by the minute.
He’s done playing nice; gives your hip a pinch. “Come on, you’re killing me here. What’s with all the arts and crafts?”
“Now, before you say anything,” your voice is soft and placating and giving him all the more reason to worry, "‘Becca came by to visit me the other day and said she really liked what I made you for lunch last week.”
“So this is for her?” Leon breathes a sigh of relief. He was starting to thin-
“No, this is for you, silly!”
And you laugh like it’s funny.
“I thought I should start putting in some more effort into your food. You’re away for work so often, and I don’t get to make you nice things as much as I want to.”
Leon chokes a little and looks back down at Hello Kitty’s gleaming metal face. “This is…what I’m taking to work?”
Your face falls. “What, you don’t like it?”
“No, doll, it looks delicious but…you really didn’t have to go all out. Your sandwiches are just fine. I don’t wanna give you the trouble, y’know?”
“No trouble at all, baby,” you practically sing the words as you twirl to add your knife to a precarious tower of dishes in the sink, “you just say the word, and I can make you bento boxes every week.”
Every week?
You cup a soapy palm to Leon’s cheek as his gaze descends into a thousand-yard stare to rival Hello Kitty’s. “I think your friends might even be excited about your lunch now!”
Oh, absolutely. Chris was going to have a field day.
Chris completely loses his shit as predicted.
“Oh, Leon, it’s adorable,” Rebecca chimes in hopefully as Chris coughs into his fist, “you should have seen how excited she was when I gave her the box!”
The frustrated ceramic click of Leon’s teeth is somehow audible over Chris’ uncivilized howling. “So this was your idea?”
She gives him a sheepish chuckle.
“Rebecca, I thought we were friends,” he pleads as he picks up his metal fork. The team hovers over Leon’s shoulders like vultures to eye what his wife’s made him for lunch.
To your credit, it’s a mealtime Michelangelo. There are Sanrio-themed rice balls of both the brown and white variety, vegetables neatly cut and festooned with animal picks, a beautifully folded omelet, and the ever omniscient octopus sausages. Hello Kitty’s metal face guards the entire hoard like a gargoyle. It’s enough to make Leon lose his lunch, but he’d have to have some first to cough it up.
He gives the octopus a tentative poke.
“Seriously, Leon, just man up and eat the damn thing.” Jill takes no nonsense as usual, plucking a carrot from the bed of lettuce and tossing it into her mouth. “Chris is just salty he’s having his fifth protein shake lunch of the week.”
“Am not!”
“Are too!”
It’s never quiet with those two around, but Rebecca gives him an encouraging smile as he gives the octopus a chew. It’s not bad, really. It’s just something about eating something with ey-
Rapid alarm beeps in the main compound snap the team’s attention away from the bento box affair and towards the map in the middle. Rebecca shoots off in her rolling chair to pull up what’s alerting the alarm system, and Hunnigan’s business voice projects into Leon’s earpiece.
“I hope you’ve had a satisfying lunch.”
He wonders if Hunnigan ever eats as he shoves his bento box into the breast pocket of his leather jacket.
She, however, is unconcerned. “You’re going to need the energy for the incident we’ve just gotten wind of downtown.”
The situation was supposed to be minor. There were rumors of King Tut’s Curse swirling amongst the museum staff after a rare shipment of Egyptian artifacts, but nobody had taken anything seriously until a janitor walked into the storage room and came back out more dead than alive. Things escalated after the infected janitor wandered into the World War II exhibit and bit the cleaning team there. The staff was horrified, the media was unhelpfully broadcasting the entire thing on live TV, and the DSO had blessedly quieted the whole thing down on that end before directing the case to Leon’s team as a classic T-virus takedown operation.
Easy as pie. Except the undead cleaning crew had gotten ahold of loaded World War II guns, you know, for historical accuracy.
It’s a cinch for the most part to evacuate the visitors from the museum. Leon ushers terrified middle schoolers out of the exhibits as fast as he can while the rest of his team rounds up the infected, and it’s a routine sweep. He just feels bad for the kiddos.
“But what about the gift sho- AHH!! ” Leon whirls around to see an Infected point a knife bayonet into a terrified sixth-grader’s face. The zombie’s finger pulls back the trigger almost cinematically, and Leon’s not stupid. He’s going to be too late.
The gun fires.
It fires a round directly into his left shoulder as he shoves the kid to safety.
Leon collapses on the ground after shooting the zombie’s head to bits, but his shoulder aches something fierce. Oh God, not again, this time he hasn’t even got Ada to patch him up. He gingerly presses two fingers to the wound and pulls them away to inspect the warm spill of blood, but surprisingly, his fingers come away clean.
Jill comes running up as he stumbles to his feet. The last of the Infected have been wiped out, she explains frantically, pulling out a roll of gauze, and everything’s secure, but suddenly she stops to peer at his spotless bullet wound.
So it’s not just him. There was definitely a shot, and his shoulder definitely hurts like a bitch.
But where was the bullet?
You’re chewing your nails down to the quick when Leon walks into the living room later that evening. The quiet shuffle of his shoes falling onto the stand prompts you to smother in him a warm, bakery-scented hug and take him by surprise, but he squeezes you back as much as his shoulder allows.
You sniffle into his leather-clad chest. “I’m so sorry, baby, I just- I saw the news before they stopped the broadcast and I can’t believe they sent you to deal with the riot!”
So that’s what Hunnigan fed the press this time. Practical as always.
“I can’t believe I made you go to work with that stupid lunch,” you carry on, gasping as you spot the bandage peeking through his jacket, “you didn’t like it and you could have died, I’m never-”
“I’m alright, no biggie.” Leon kisses the top of your head, taking you by the arms and sitting you down next to him on the couch. You furiously wipe a tear off your face.
“It’s not alright, I’m never making you anything you don’t like ever again. That bento box is bad juju. I’m telling Rebecca never to buy anything from that shop from now on.”
Okay, so you finally admit the box is creepy. Leon bites back a laugh.
“Woah, doll, not so fast. You think it’s the box’s fault I got hurt?”
“What else would it be? Today’s the first time you take it to work, and then you get shot on a regular patrol.” You frown as he pulls the Hello Kitty bento out from inside his jacket. “You brought that thing home?”
He chuckles. “Take a look at it. I’ve got you to thank for saving my life.”
You squint at the tin and realize with a startle that a bullet round is lodged smack dab in the middle of Hello Kitty’s yellow nose. Like a goddamn bullseye.
The lunchbox had taken the brunt of the hit, leaving Leon unscathed.
“Incredible.” you breathe out.
And he’s inclined to agree.
“So, doll,” Leon grins, “got any leftovers for tomorrow? Chris is a really big fan of the octopus things.”
psst, find more of my work here!
comments and reblogs are very much appreciated <3 take care and i love you!
#leon kennedy#leon s kennedy#leon kennedy x reader#leon x reader#leon kennedy x you#leon kennedy fluff#leon kennedy x y/n#leon kennedy fanfic#leon kennedy fanfiction#resident evil#vaaaaaiolet#ao3 fanfic
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Day 1: Yandere School Doodle
Day 2: Balinese Folklore, Brazilian Folklore, Romanian Folklore
Day 3: Secret Collection, AI [Yandere Android]
Day 4: Yokai Harem Doodle, Homemade Meal [Yandere Serial Killer]
Day 5: Deep Sea Monster, Yandere School Doodle
Day 6: Unorthodox Gift [Yandere Yakuza]
Day 7: Dear Alice [Cute!Yandere]
Day 8: Chimera [Deer Monster]
Day 9: Heart on a platter [Demon King]
Day 10: Dragon!Guardian
Day 11: Dragon!Guardian Doodle, Medieval Menace [Vegetable Lamb Hybrid]
Day 12: Devilish Charm [Zzy]
Day 13: Mating Season [Lion!Hybrid & Tiger!Hybrid]
Day 14: Eyes Everywhere! [Internet Monster]
Day 15: Monster Streaming Doodle
Day 16: A piece of me [Angel], Idolatry [Angel]
Day 17: Razor Sharp Smile [Vampire Clown]
Day 18: Yandere School Doodle
Day 19: Wings, Under Lock and Key [Fae] (Postponed)
Day 20: Fear of the dark [Ghost Harem]
Day 21: Undead [Zombie x Grave Robber!Reader]
Day 22: Mommy's Little Monsters [Spider Horde]
Day 23: Aftercare [Yandere Circus]
Day 24: I put a spell on you [Succubus]
Day 25: Tainted Love [Naga]
Day 26: Full Moon [Werewolf]
Day 27: Android Caretaker
Day 28: Dullahan [Pumpkin Assistant]
Day 29: I come with knives [Slasher]
Day 30: Alien [Xenomorph Queen + Hive], Monster Hotel Guest
Day 31: Art the Clown / Priest x Reader x “Angel” (Vampire)
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