#kendra goes fuck fuck this is so scary

[mercutiotakethewheel]

Kendra, inwardly: Omg I am so scared right now. I’m going to die here. This freakyass magical creatures about to do me in. And could do so easily, which I am imagining very vividly right now. Those are huge teeth. I am fighting god to hold it together right now. I don’t want to die. Why am I here? Just to suffer, every night I close my eyes and—

Kendra, outwardly: I cast vicious mockery.

[givemewallywestorgivemedeath]

Something about dc glass canons just hit different.

Dc has a lot of tank characters. The heavy hitters. The overpowered pseudo gods. I'm talking your average Kryptonian, Amazonian, Atlantean or Martian. A tank character in dc usually has super strength and a very high durability, if not complete invulnerability. Starfire and Cyborg, for example, would be considered tanks because of how durable, strong and powerful they are, despite the fact that they aren't invulnerable.

There are a lot of tank characters in dc. Classic tanks for the Teen Titans are Donna, Garth, Vic and Kori. For Young Justice, the tank characters are Cassie and Kon. In the Justice League they'd be Clark, Diana, Arthur, J'onn, Kendra/Shayera, Billy, ect. I could literally list tank characters all day. There are so many of them.

I find that tanks can get a little old, fast. There isn't a whole lot you can do with a tank character, especially not with dc tanks. They're all basically gods so there aren't a whole lot of stakes in your stories. Usually these tanks have a fatal weakness to make them more interesting and to insert stakes back into the story but even with those they can get dull. Dc tanks tend to have a heart of gold and they don't tend to mess around with morality much. These are powerful characters and with that much power it becomes scary if they are anything less than a boy scout. Of course there are exceptions, like when dc wants their characters to be edgy (cough cough Arthur and Diana) but typically the tanks are fairly cut and dry morality wise and very palatable.

Then there are dc's 'just some guy's. There's a lot of these as well. These are your typical 'no powers' heroes like Batman, Green Arrow, Nightwing, Red Arrow and Robin. There are a lot of these guys. Now the 'just some guy's are allowed to be very complex characters with a wide range of morality. In fact, they're encouraged to do so because they're supposed to be relatable to the audience. The tanks are gods to be admired, bastions of peace, hope and justice, but the 'just some guy's? They are just people. For that reason they can be incredibly compelling and interesting characters but they lose a lot of points when it comes to fights. Because of the power scaling in DC, these characters are either unable to do anything above street level or they have an insane amount of plot conveniences that allow them to somehow win (Batman with his prep time or Batman with his bottomless utility belt or, well, really Batman with anything)

But where dc really hits it out of the park? Their best and most compelling characters (in my opinion)??? The glass canons. A glass canon, for those unfamiliar, is a character who can deal a massive amount of damage but who goes down with one hit. All the power of the tank and all the vulnerability of the 'just some guy'. Not a god, not a man but perpetually in-between.

Classic DC glass canons would be Wally, Raven and Gar (depending) for the Teen Titans, Bart for Young Justice, Barry/Wally, Hal/John/Guy/Kyle/Jess/Simon/Jo, Zatanna and Black Canary (depending). Basically any speedster, Green Lantern or magic user would fit the bill. Some metas as well depending on power levels. Gar and Dinah are tricky because to truly be a glass canon you have to have an insane amount of power and around normal human durability. So it really depends on their characterization.

Dc's glass canons are so much fun. They're allowed to be human! By god do they fuck up and mess around and make mistakes. They try their best to be good but it's not an inherent quality like the tanks. They're powerful enough to be cocky but mortal enough that they're extremely vulnerable at all times. Take Bart for example. That little dude could rewrite reality if he wanted to. He could take out an army before they could blink. He could hop across the multiverse in an instant. He'd also collapse if you hit him over the head with a chair.

It's just such a fun dynamic??? The stakes are real. One bullet could take your hero out and yet they still face down gunfire everyday. They have the powers of gods and yet they are extremely human and flawed. It's a fight between holding back and being human and letting loose and becoming the thing they fear.

I just find the glass canon to be such a compelling character archetype. This character could singlehandedly take down a country if they wanted to but also they just got a paper cut while trying to do their taxes.

[ifeveristoday]

 [video description: just me yelling for seven minutes straight]

Ok. Am I ready for this?

Every issue of the Boom! Verse has been building up layers of characterizations and the aftermaths of choices. Issue 9 shows us the fallout of two major events - the showdown at Sunnydale Museum, and Xander’s half Vampire state (and what Willow had to do to get him there).

It also touches on the fact that Buffy is in the Hellmouth with no way to contact the surface world.

Yet that isn’t the most pressing matter in this issue.

Relationships are frayed.

Everyone in the Scooby Gang is isolated.

Jenny has a cat.

Sorry, that’s not thematically relevant but I, as a cat person, am legally bound to discuss when there is a cat in media.

JENNY HAS A GREY TABBY WHAT IS THEIR NAME

Spoilers and reactions to issue nine under the cut - we scream and flail like men, who needs a review?

PTSD CLUB PTSD CLUB PTSD CLUB

edited to correct that bit about Willow’s hair and level of evil it indicates

Something that Jordie used early on is the narrator POV (unreliable perhaps) and it returns to this issue. But instead of Xander or Willow, it’s Joyce. And she’s grieving about the world she’s lost but what every parent knows in the back of their mind: the world is tough and scary and so many bad things can happen. And Joyce has survived the attack but there’s no Buffy to commiserate with, to fuss over in person. (Also, what a nod to Joyce’s obliviousness in TV canon - to believe that Buffy would just go on a mandatory field trip with no phone connection.) Luckily, she has Eric, who is supportive and says all the right things. 

Joyce’s disconnect with what she feels and the outside world’s determination to ‘life goes on’ is repeated in the rest of the issue, as our favorite Sunnydale residents deal with both small and large terrors.

Revelations besides Jenny’s cat:

Cordelia works in a clothing shop and there are some Portland looking dudes roaming around Sunnydale. Or maybe it’s Silver Lake. She still has a crush on Spike, because who hasn’t met a mysterious, well-muscled stranger emerging from the forest like a person-shaped Cheshire cat and thought, “Gotta get me some of that?”

I mean, a whole fairytale industry has grown up around that idea.

But despite all normal appearances (and Cordelia is the still most ‘normal’ character) and her Cordy Crew updates, life is not going to her plans. There are fissures erupting in the sidewalk, cracks appearing in walls, people are stressed and Cordelia can’t even play with her dog without falling over said fissures. Oh, and her books are dissolving into ash when she opens her locker.

So shit is horrible.

Willow’s dyed a black streak in her hair (honey, red hair is the hardest color to re-dye to. Your hair is so beautiful and now you’ve got to tone and strip the fuck out of that streak if you want a base to dye it red again - oh wait, magic, I guess) and is being rude and abrupt and just plain Not Willow with Rose and everyone.

Except Willow chafes at the idea of there being a standard for her - why should she be just the smart capable responsible one? While a vampire doppelganger doesn’t burst out of the wall and drawls that she’s bored now, Willow is resentful that Rose and everyone else expects her to be one way when hello, the world is on fire outside.

Rose has found out about the weird shit that goes on in Sunnydale and accuses Willow of keeping things from her, including giant bats and the fact that Buffy was there, and she, Willow’s girlfriend and considerably known her longer than Buffy (imp.)  wasn’t there or told about it.

Willow naturally thinks that Rose being jealous of Buffy is just stupid, because Buffy isn’t even there and honestly she’s not even thinking about it. Which causes Rose to worry why is her empathetic Willow like this?

Which makes Willow lash out that she’s tired of having to be the one who has to consider everyone else’s feelings but her own? Why can’t she have the space to figure out what she wants?

And like that, Rose and Willow are on a break.

Xander, in direct contrast to everyone else around him, is calm and sensitive and just generally being a good bean. He’s concerned about Willow and Buffy, but he’s not crowding Willow. He’s patrolling in Buffy’s absence and making stakes and friends with raccoons - and all of his warm-heartedness and acceptance of ‘everyone’s journey is different’ upsets Giles, who is stubbly and running on presumably zero sleep as he worries about Buffy, and the break in his relationship.

Xander’s facade of handling all the weird crap Sunnydale’s thrown at him gets blown when he encounters a vampire delivery boy in the cemetery. He wins the fight, but the vampire’s words taunting him that they’re just monsters, and not in-between--unfinished like Xander is, resonates with him. Xander’s been doing so well, learning how to live and cope with his depression, being a good friend and responsible evil thwarter - and then to have Giles dismiss him so coldly? And to have one of his worst fears spoken out loud - he’s not human anymore. Not in the way that it used to count. And he’s only half a vampire - and there’s no one else straddling that line so he’s still alone. 

Everyone needs a hug.

Especially Giles and Jenny, because shit, things get incredibly real in the next act. Giles heads over to Jenny’s house to make some kind of amends, but Jenny is understandably Not Having It. Giles disregards all of her reasonable requests, pushes past her and enters her home and then tries to make her understand how really, she’s wrong and he’s right and MAYBE IF SHE HADN’T GIVEN THE DAGGER TO DRUSILLA, THE WORLD WOULDN’T BE ON FIRE.

This is a mess. In so many ways Giles is wrong - he ignored her request to stay away, he invited himself in - and then spent too long trying to make excuses for why it was OK for him to do all of that shit. And he looks a hot mess while doing so - I don’t even think it’s the artwork style, it’s just that Giles is wild-eyed, wrecked, and actually slavering at the mouth as he tries to explain his point of view. He’s feverish and Jenny puts aside her anger for a minute to get him a glass of water. Like, yes, she’s furious with him, but she still loves him, even though this scary man practically foaming at the mouth doesn’t really look like her partner.

Jenny presses him on his attempt to protect them all, asking pointedly, what about her?

Giles automatically assumes she’s talking about Buffy and assures her that he knows Buffy’s capable of fending for herself, which is exactly the Wrong Thing to Say, because as previous issues have shown, Jenny is not cool with children having to save the world, and also, Buffy’s mom? How about her, Fuckhead Watcher Man.

And Giles goes and puts his whole head up his ass as he says that there are sacrifices that come with successes, as in any war - and Jenny loses it. Because Giles rants do you think that it’s easy for him to live to believe that everything in his life is disposable except for Buffy? That nothing else matters?

And Jenny reads the underlining footnote - if nothing matters, where does that leave her in his life?

FOR FUCK’S SAKE GILES YOU’RE DERANGED GO HOME

And Jenny’s cat agrees with me and hisses at him to leave Jenny alone.

Giles exits the house wondering aloud has everyone gone mad, while a suspicious rabbit looks on from the grass.

There’s a Tucker Wells/Andrew shades of who the fuck cares interlude about a lonely kid who stalks his school facebook to read the comments about classmates and I might be callous, but I actually do not care about those type of characters because guess what, lots of lonely kids and people out there and their first thought is not to kill everyone else. Anyway, I suspect this is a side effect of the Hellmouth magnifying negative thoughts.

It lingers on Buffy’s face and the comments - “She’s weird but hot.”

Now imagine that being her epitaph. 

This pans over to the last sequence - Robin is chilling at home, and his dad (!!!) tells him to go to bed, he doesn’t care how much this town is falling apart. Robin’s dad believes in education.

And guess who shows up at his door in the late of night?

KENDRA.

And she hits him with a Star Wars reference. “Aren’t you a little short for a watcher?”

[kalinara]

Rip Week #1  The Many Faces of Rip

It’s been a long time since I’ve posted anything positive about Legends of Tomorrow.  However, it’s Rip Hunter Appreciation Week, which is a time meant for positivity!   At one point this show, and this character, had me blogging meta on a daily basis for almost two and a half years and introduced me to some great people! And I will always be grateful for that.

So the topic for Day 1 of Rip Hunter Appreciation Week: The Many Faces of Rip Hunter.

One thing that still fascinates me about Rip as a character is that, even though he’d only been a central character on the show for 1.5 seasons, we’ve gotten to see so many different sides of the character.  He’s been deconstructed so thoroughly and so fascinatingly, allowing us to really appreciate what makes the character tick.

Let’s start with Rip himself, the baseline number.  The guy who kidnapped a bunch of assholes, brought them to the roof of a tall building (and I still wonder how the stringy little bastard actually managed that) and gave them a sales pitch of a lifetime.

From the opening scene of the pilot, to Rip’s almost goodbye into the sun in Legendary, season one was first and foremost the story of a man broken by grief and betrayal, who slowly, and reluctantly found a reason to go on, and people to share it with.  Rip spent season one a raw, open wound, ugly in his pain and rage.  He tried very hard not to stay focused on his goal. He tried very hard not to care about his team.

He failed pretty much on day one, when he saved Martin Stein’s marriage.  He failed again not too long after that when he abandoned the closest thing he had to a working plan to get Carter’s body back for Kendra.  And he kept failing over and over again.

And they saved him.  They challenged him.  They forced him to look outside of his single-focused obsession and look at the people that they could save around them.  They forced him to take a long hard look at what he was doing when he started to go too far.  And he very clearly and very obviously loved them for it.

I still can’t believe that fandom still tries to claim that Rip didn’t care about his team, when we saw how broken he was after each major loss: Carter, Leonard, even Jax (almost).  That’s not a man who is unfeeling.

We saw Rip as a child: a tiny savage creature who, even when warm and fed, was still ready to stab the nearest adult who threatened him.  It gave a new, fascinating insight to the tension Rip had with both Leonard Snart and Mick Rory.  As well as possibly another reason that he’d bonded with Sara so strongly.  Rip is someone who understands what it means to become a monster in order to survive, and what it means to have to live with that afterward.  It likely does make it difficult when face to face with people who represented the worst of that time (and that’s not even touching on how child Rip probably met a number of people who looked and acted similar to our lovable Rogues, and it likely would not have ended well.)

We’ve never really seen the man Rip was before he was broken.  Except perhaps for a giddy romantic moment with Miranda and that horrible humiliation when they were caught.  We’ve heard a bit more: from that pirate in Marooned, from Magister Druce and Jonah Hex.   We can draw inferences: a man who was capable and skilled (though perhaps not as skilled as his wife :-)), who never the less was a rulebreaker at heart.  Someone who fell in love with the idea of heroism to the point where he almost left the Time Masters entirely.  Someone who, while loyal, wasn’t quite willing to trust his masters with the tool to unmake reality.  But at the same time, someone whose fundamental trust in INDIVIDUALS like Mary Xavier and Magister Druce, survived even when his world fell apart.

At the end of season 1, we got a Rip Hunter who was ready to finally move past his grief, and it will forever be something of a disappointment to me that the series decided to give us a time jump instead of actually showing us Rip learning to be part of a real team.

But season 2 did give us a truly fascinating deconstruction of Rip Hunter as an individual.

One very common plot in almost every superhero’s story is the depowerment story arc.  Who is our hero when he doesn’t have what makes him a hero?  It’s most common for men like Superman of course, but we even get it for folks like Batman or Green Arrow.  What are these men without their money, or their physicality?

What is Rip Hunter without his knowledge, his memories, or his time machine?

Well, we saw him.  And he was adorable!  Phil Gasmer was a hilarious story beat, but unlike maybe certain other storyline elements that we see in later seasons, there was also a point to Phil Gasmer.  Phil Gasmer showed us the kind of man that Rip Hunter is deep down.

He’s creative.  He’s clever.  He’s determined.  He’s a little whiny.  And definitely high.  Rip is a man who would benefit from a little unofficial pharmaceutical help.  He’s a man who, when the world suddenly goes sideways, will first attempt to protect his friend.  He’s a man who, when face to face with a stranger with scary abilities, will try to hit him with a script.  He’s a man who loves his team so much that even when he has no conscious recollection of them, he made them the basis of his movie.  And he’s a man who walked out to face the Legion to save a bunch of strangers who kidnapped him, because it was the right thing to do.

I’d like to think in another universe, Phil didn’t get kidnapped by Eobard Thawne there, but instead made it back on the ship, where the crew actually got the chance to get to know Rip without all the baggage.  I think they’d have gotten along.

And then there’s evil Rip.

“Teammate goes evil” storylines are a dime a dozen, in superhero lore, but there’s a reason for that.  When done well, they can be amazing.  And ultimately, I think the evil Rip storyline was done very well.

One of the things that I always liked about the evil Rip storyline is how it utterly destroyed that pervasive (and wrong!) fan idea that Rip never cared about his team.  Because they showed us a Rip who didn’t care about his team, and he was a fucking scary son of a bitch.

He also showed us how Rip’s best worst enemy was always going to be himself.  Because holy shit, Rip is competent when he’s not tripping himself up.  Turncoat was terrifying in all the best ways, and even that opening of Land of the Lost was amazing.  It’s still very amusing to me that the most effective member of the Legion of Doom was the one Eobard brainwashed into it.

One thing I always found fascinating about evil Rip is that, for all that he lacks Rip’s compassion, empathy and love, he didn’t go the usual scenery chewing sadist route.  He’s a monster, of course.  He was perfectly happy to murder Sara, to carve the spear piece out of McNider, and brainwash the entire knights of Camelot.  But it was always a measured sort of evil.

Evil Rip had a goal, and evil Rip pursued his goal.  And if he could get what he wanted in a relatively non-disruptive and non-violent way, he was willing to try it.  He had no interest in terrorizing the Waverider crew once he had the spear piece from them, even when he saw that Sara had survived her murder.  He tried to trick McNider, only resorting to violence when McNider saw through it.  When he had control of the knights, he just had them stand there, much to Darhk’s boredom, rather than playacting some farce for his amusement as some of the others might have done.

Evil Rip was our chance to appreciate how truly formidable Rip could actually be, and also appreciate those qualities that kept him from turning into that monster again.

My biggest disappointment in this story arc was how little we got to see Rip interact with the other members of the Legion.  His interactions with Eobard and Darhk, in what little we had, were very entertaining.  But we never saw him interact with Malcolm at all (I admit to being intrigued by this, because I thought Malcolm had actually had the most interesting dynamic with Phil in Legion of Doom), and we never saw Eobard react to his capture.  Missed opportunities or food for fanfic?

I don’t know if Doomworld Rip really counts, but I have to admit that, compared to some of Rip’s other coping mechanisms, baking cakes to deal with a year of solitary confinement (Gideon sort of counts, but she’s just a voice at this point), is pretty good for him.  I hope he actually got a chance to eat them.

The idea behind Rip at the Time Bureau really was a good one.  The idea that Rip would have created this organization, but specifically designed it to be the antithesis of the Time Masters: open, transparent, and accountable, is a good one.  But unfortunately, season 3 never really explored that to the extent I would have liked.  

It’s hard to imagine the Rip who recruited Sara before she could die with her sister to Damien Darhk would be okay with leaving Zari in a prison without a very good reason.  But we never got that reason.  Of course, maybe he wasn’t.  He wasn’t in that episode.  We know from Ava that he didn’t want her chasing the Legends, and wanted them given “lenience”.  But if he’s not on board with that, how much of the Time Bureau is actually under his control?

Considering that Return of the Mack told us that Rip allowing Darhk to be resurrected in order to confront him with agents was a “sanctioned” plan (that Rip still ends up in prison for, because Rip is just that good with people), that implies a certain level of oversight.  His and Bennett’s dynamic seemed just shy of outright antagonistic.  And certainly Rip seemed a lot more blase about seeing Bennett meet a grisly end than seems warranted.  This is a man who dismantled the team after Leonard Snart died.

I mean, trying to work out coherent characterization for ANYONE in season 3 is a bit of a problem, but I feel like if the Time Bureau had gotten the same level of focus that it gets much later, perhaps some of these things could actually work.  If, for example, there are multiple factions within the Bureau with their own ideas on what the Bureau is supposed to do, (perhaps tied with the oversight that Rip specifically put in place, because there’s nothing more Rip Hunter than getting hoisted up by his own petard), then a lot of the more confused behavior by the organization could make more sense.

In the end though, Rip is still a secretive, scheming bastard who cares very deeply for his team, and I wouldn't give up that wonderful, almost baggage free friendship with Wally for anything. So it does have its good points.

Ultimately, I think that all of these facets make Rip one of the most well-developed and defined characters in the CW-verse, even when compared with others who have had years and years of screentime.  It’s fun to poke around and explore all of these layers and see how they fit.  And it definitely is food for some great fanfic.  I’m told some other Rip fans will be writing some great fic for #RipWeek.  You should go check them out!

[tessxomarie]

Saving You - Part Fifteen

*GIF Inspired by the fact Leah is a total BAMF in this scene, thank you Liz Gillies for my Leah inspiration.*

*TRIGGER WARNING: This scene discusses sexual assault, rape and self-harm, also some detailed scenes that relate to the how Mayans & SOA “handles” certain situations are portrayed. If you need to skip this part, please do so. Also, please remember if you need or want to talk, please message me as I am always here to listen!*

Coco soon departs, and Angel and I walk back into the bedroom.

“Leah, talk to me babe. I can’t tell what you’re thinking, and it’s scaring me. I know you want this to end, but I can’t let you go if you’re not in the right headspace.” Angel says to me with a nervous voice.

I take another breath, and I look at Angel in the eyes as he stands right next to me, cupping my face with one hand, running his other hand through my hair.

“It doesn’t feel real, Angel. This is all going to end, tonight. I’m going to be free of the pain, the fear, everything.” I admit as I look up into those warm and inviting eyes.

Angel then presses his forehead to mine, “Yes, you will babe. I promise, this is going to end once and for all.” He tells me and we just share a moment, both of Angel’s hands now cupping my face, our foreheads still pressed together, eyes closed.

I place my hands on top of Angel’s, and slowly breathe.

He is my calm.

He is my peace.

He is my safehaven.

Angel Reyes is a force I didn’t see coming, but I am so fucking grateful it did.

We both slowly withdrawal from our embrace.

I continue to gaze up at Angel, and he quirks a look at me, “Thank you, Angel.” I begin, and he gives me another confused look.

“Thank you for everything the last day and a half, I mean, I know I’ve already thanked you but I feel like I need to thank you for a lifetime – you’ve done so much to help me, I don’t know where to begin to express my gratitude.” I softly say looking up at him.

Angel’s mouth then forms a big cheesy smile, and he uses one hand to cup my face and bring me in one more time.

“Anything for you, My Leah.” He whispers softly as he presses his lips to my forehead.

Angel then pulls out his phone and checks the time, “If this is what you still want, we need to get going now, babe.”

I nod my head in agreement, I scatter to gather my bag and phone.

��I need to call Kendra, I need her there, Angel.” I inform, and I prepare for a battle but to my surprise, Angel simply nods his head in agreement.

“Just give me a few minutes, please?” I ask.

Angel grabs my keys and informs me he’ll pull my car around for me as I’ll be following him on his bike.

I dial up Kendra in hopes of her to answer.

“Lee?” She says breathlessly.

“Kenz, are you okay?” I ask with worry.

“Uh, yeah. It’s just, EZ just told me the news.” She says in shock.

“Yeah, they found Erik.” I confirm.

“Are you still going there?” She asks.

“I need to Kenz, I need this. I also need you, I need you with me.”

“I want to be there for you, Leah. You know I’ll be there.”

I take a deep breath, as I am relieved to hear Kendra will be by my side. But I’m also super nervous, because I need her to bring me something and I know she will freak out.

“Real quick Kenz, I need you to bring something for me.”

“Whatever you need, I gotchu.” She replies.

“I need a razor blade.” I spit.

Silence fills the phone.

“Kenz?” I ask, wondering if the call dropped.

“Aleeah, I will not contribute to self harm. This is not the answer, I –“ She starts going on before I have to cut her off.

“Kendra! I promise you, on Jax and Tara’s graves, I will not use the blade for self - harm. Please, I need you to bring me one. Please trust me.” I plead.

“I trust you, Lee. I do, I’m just nervous.” She admits.

“I’m nervous too, but we can do this, we need to do this.” I hang up with Kendra a few moments afterwards.

We were informed to meet at the clubhouse first, then we would be instructed on where to go.

Angel locks up the house and I follow him in my Jeep to the clubhouse.

The drive feels like it takes six months, the build up of tonight’s events are getting to me.

It feels like I’m in a dream, a dream where I’m unsure if the ending is going to be a happy or scary one.

Before I even realize it, I see Chucky opening up the gates for us to enter.

Everyone is already here, including Marcus and the Sons. As soon as I park my car, Kendra rushes over to me.

“Lee!” She shouts as she quickly walks to me and gives me a huge hug.

“I needed to hug you, I needed to know you’re okay and that you really meant that we can do this.” She says to me as she buries her face in my neck.

I’ve seen Kendra worried and scared a handful of times, two times were when I hurt myself, and another time is right now. She’s worried sick.

“Kenz, are you alright? First and foremost…” I trail off as I cup her face.

“I honestly never thought this would happen, but also, EZ filled me in on other details, you need to go talk to Marcus and Bishop, I’ll be fine. I’m here for you, Aleeah, always.” She assures me with a tight squeeze of my hand.

Angel guides me over to Marcus and Bishop, I see Chibs and Tig join our small crowd.

“Aleeah, we’re glad to see you.” Marcus says to me.

“It’s a once and a lifetime chance, I have to be here.” I say looking at all of the men.

They all nod in agreement, but I can sense tension.

“What’s going on? You all look extremely nervous, and no offense, that’s not helping me.” I interject.

“Leah, sweetheart, we had to involve some other help – in order to take care of Erik.” Bishop starts out, and I give Angel a concerned look.

“What do you mean, Bish?” Angel eagerly asks.

“We had to be smart with the way we dispose of the bastard.” Chibs replies with an eye roll.

“It was a tough decision for Chibs and I to agree on, given the history however, Alvarez and Bishop made a good case and most importantly, it’s a decision we all agree that Jax would have done the same thing.” Tig continues.

I give the men the same confused look, and Angel’s face relaxes a bit as I have a feeling he must know where this is leading however I remain in the dark.

“Miguel Galindo is going to help us out. He offered us his Pew, it’s a safe and private location. We dropped Erik off there first, and let his men babysit him for a few hours. Miguel was mortified when I told him of what had happened Aleeah. He wants to help you in any way he can right now.” Marcus explains, and although I should be terrified of hearing the Galindo name, I’m ultimately relieved.

I met Miguel along with Emily a few months back, just as I was getting settled in Santo Padre, Marcus had reached out and asked if I could help out a friend and their son with my nursing abilities.

Cristobal, Miguel and Emily’s son, he had come down with a slight fever and a cold. Emily was refusing to take him to a doctor, and their pediatrician was out of town and could not make a house call. For whatever reason, Marcus felt I was certified enough to help the Galindo’s out.

Emily and I got off to a great start, I was more nervous to formally meet Miguel.

All my worries were gone once I was checking out Cristobal, a happy baby even with a 101 fever. Turns out, he was simply teething, and some babies like to spike fevers when doing so.

Emily felt stupid, as Cristobal had run a minor fever a few months prior due to teething. But she explained to me a brief summary of what chaos the family has endured, and she did not want to take Cristobal out of the house.

My first meeting with Miguel went extremely well, he was just happy that his son was in good health and that his son felt safe in my care.

“Aleeah.” Miguel said as Marcus lead me to the front door, “Please, Leah will do.” I nervously correct him.

“Leah, thank you from the bottom of mine and Emily’s hearts for coming out here to check on our son. As my wife explained, it’s been chaotic with our family lately and we just don’t feel comfortable taking Cristobal out and about just yet.”

“Of course, Mr. Galindo. It’s been a pleasure and honestly, thank you for trusting me to care for your son. That above all means a lot to me.” I graciously say to Miguel, because I do mean it.

“If you ever need anything, Leah – any sort of help or advice even, please do not hesitate to reach out. Marcus speaks highly of you, and he’s a man I trust with my life. I value that very much, so because of that, you are now important to us.”

The Cartel now considers me important and they therefore trust me, woah.

The Galindo Cartel is something I was made aware of back when I was around Jax and Tara. Anything Cartel related freaked me out, because one does not simply fuck with the Cartel – no links to the Cartel are the best links.

Yet here I am, tossed into the MC world which has collided with the Cartel.

I understand why Chibs and Tig were weary on this deal, but I also understand why it had to be done. Miguel and his men are the best ones to properly clean up a mess of this size.

I snap out of my flashback daze and return my focus to the men standing before me.

“I just want this all to end, I want to have peace.” I announce. Angel then wraps his arm around me and brings me in close.

“Then let’s go take care of this sick bastard, aye?” Chibs chimes in, which causes me to let out a chuckle.

The men gather on their bikes, meanwhile EZ and Gilly drive Kendra and me, in the van. The drive to the warehouse where Galindo’s Pew is at goes by rather quickly. The drive was silent, but again, not an awkward silence. More of, we all know what’s coming and we just have to get shit done, kind of silence.

It isn’t until EZ puts the van is park when my stomach starts to do flips. Kendra senses my nerves and instantly reaches over and grabs my hand.

“We got this, Lee.” She strongly affirms, and I nod my head and look her in the eyes.

We do got this, this is going to fucking end.

The men help us out of the van, and Angel once again rushes to my side.

No words are spoken, just looks exchanged.

His eyes are still warm, but I can see his concern. I intertwine our hands and give them a squeeze.

I need him to believe that I’m alright, and I can handle this.

I am strong, I am brave and I am going to end this once and for all. I tell myself silently as I stare into Angel’s eyes.

“My Leah, so strong, so brave.” Angel whispers to me as he places another kiss on my forehead.

I chuckle to myself which catches him off guard, “What is it?” He questions.

“I literally just told myself the same thing in my head, a little pep talk if you will.” I tell him which leaves him laughing too.

The brief moment of laughter is cut short when I’m quickly reminded why I’m even at this warehouse.

“Aleeah, Galindo is ready for us.” Marcus announces.

I simply nod in his direction as Angel continues to hold my hand and we begin to walk towards the door.

“Ladies, we want to see the situation first before we bring you in.” Bishop informs Kendra and myself.

“But Bishop, you told me I could be here, that I could have my closure!” I begin to raise my voice.

“Shh, shh, Leah, sweetheart – you will, darlin’. We just want to make sure the asshole is where we left him, and that he’s still breathin’ or else Bloody Sunday is about to happen a little early.” Chibs says to me.

“You’re going to get your moment, Aleeah. I promise, mija. But the guys are right, we should check the situation out first, I don’t need you to witness any other trauma.” Marcus assures me before he, along with Bishop, Tig and Chibs enter the warehouse.

Angel takes a few steps back from me to chat with the other members, and that leaves Kendra there next to me.

“Breathe, Lee. You gotta breathe.” She tells me.

I take a few deep breaths.

“I want to slit his throat, Kenz. I want to hurt him so fucking bad.” I admit, and Kendra simply nods her head.

She then whispers, “Is that what the blade is for?”

I shake my head, “I don’t know yet. I’m just so fucking angry and pissed off and sad and just fifty shades of a hot mess.” I answer.

Kendra remains at my side, holding my non-bandage wrist.

“Remind him of the pain he caused, and do what you feel is right, Lee. I’ll be cheering you on.” She says with a small smile.

Before I can respond, we hear the door open and Chibs motions for us to enter.

The men enter first, Angel looks at me before he goes in, but I nod for him to go as he sees I have Kendra by my side.

Right as we are about to enter the warehouse, Chibs stops me and gives me a half hug and kisses my temple.

“I love you, darlin’.” He says with a tight squeeze.

I look back at him and tell him what I’ve been telling myself all day, “I got this.” I say with a smile.

Chibs smiles, and I can see a quick tear forming in his eyes. He nods his head and gives me a look, a look of comfort. “Yes, you do and I know Jackie Boy going to be here helping you out. Opie too.”

To hold back my emotions from hearing those names, I nod in agreement.

I know I have an entire support system, in the living world and in the after- life. I just pray that my number one hope and wish is granted, and that Erik will leave here dead.

Kendra and I follow the MC as Miguel greets everyone.

I hear groans and slight screams from behind where Miguel is standing, but I cannot make out who it is coming from.

“Leah.” Miguel greets.

He makes his way through the crowd to me, and he has a somber expression.

“Hola Miguel.” I say above a whisper.

“I don’t know what words to say to you, there’s nothing that can I can say to erase what has happened. I am truly sorry that you had to endure such a disgusting act.” He says to me as he meets me face to face through the crowd of bikers.

“Thank you, Miguel.” I say quietly. He nods his head in an understanding way.

“Erik Rodrigo has been looked after by my men and has been in the best care.” Miguel announces as we all slowly turn to see Erik sitting in the Pew.

My stomach starts to do flips, as I finally see Erik sitting on the bench.

He’s moving around, and it looks like he’s already been beaten up a bit.

“Leah, come with us.” Bishop whispers and motions for me to take a few more steps forward.

I’m now standing in front of the crowd, Kendra is still right behind me. I’m by Marcus, Miguel, Bishop, Chibs and Tig.

Angel is right behind me as well, I can’t see him but I can feel him.

This calming feeling, I can literally sense it and before I can confirm he’s right behind me, Angel moves towards me and kisses the top of my head.

“Mr. Rodrigo, for the record, is it true that you assaulted and raped Miss Parker not only last night, but on the night of February 18th, 2017?” Miguel asks Erik, and again my stomach does slips.

“Raped?” Erik scoffs while remaining restrained in the pew.

“I never fucking raped that bitch, she was begging for it all night long.” He states, and my blood begins to boil.

“You lying mother fucker!” Angel shouts, but before I can I hold him back and look at him, Angel has made a b-line to Erik and starts to punch him with great force.

“Oh, Angel are you jealous? That I got a taste of that sweet pussy before you did, she sure is a good fuck.” Erik continues, and that adds to Angels’ rage. EZ is able to grab Angel and restrain him, as I now begin to cry.

“Fuck you, you sick Bastard!” I shout as I take a few steps forward, “I told you, ‘no’” I shout as my voice begins to shake, “I fucking told you ‘no’”. I whimper.

Erik begins to laugh, “It’s a shame I didn’t listen, huh?” He retorts in a snarky fashion, and before I lose all of my emotions, Kendra scoops me up as EZ walks Angel back to me.

“Erik Rodrigo, I have no other words for you. You are a poor excuse of a human being. The only way to get any sort of resolution for your heinous crimes, well, I guess I’ll just your fellow bikers do the talking. But before that, I’m going to leave you with this.” Miguel states before he hauls off and punches Erik in the face.

Erik continues to laugh, it must be his defense mechanism because part of me truly believes he is scared – that this is not how he pictured his life turning out, yet we are here.

I wouldn’t wish this torture on anyone, but right now, it feels like this is the only fair way.

Kendra and Angel continue to hold my hand and rub my shoulder. My support system that I never knew I needed.

Marcus then walks up to Erik, and Erik’s facial expression changes.

“I patched you in, Erik. You had so much promise, I was excited for you. Then, I find out you hurt someone who I look at like a daughter, so basically you hurt my daughter and that will not go unanswered. You’re going to fucking die, ese. I’m here to make sure of it.” Marcus states as he is now face to face with Erik as he crouches down to Erik’s level.

All Erik does is spit in Marcus’ face, which then results in Marcus punching Erik in the face. Marcus begins to take a step away, but he pulls out his weapon and shoots him in the thigh.

“This is just the beginning.” Marcus says as he turns and walks back.

I look at Kendra and motion with my hand for the blade, “Now.” I whisper, and without hesitation she pulls it out of her pocket and I charge over to Erik determined.

“Alee-lee-lee-ah, my my, work up the courage to come talk to me with all of your body guards? So brave of you.” He tells me.

I look him in the eyes, and I laugh for a second because his sarcasm is beyond irritating at this point.

“First off,” I begin as I haul off and smack him across the face with all the force I have. “I don’t need body guards, and secondly, I’m braver than you.” I continue.

I pull out the blade but now, I manage to walk behind the Pew.

“Nestor, could you be a gentleman and come over here and make sure Mr. Rodrigo’s hands remained restrained?” I ask Nestor who is one of Miguel’s trusted security men, he walks over and confirms with me that his hands are still restrained.

“Free one of his hands please, this is where my fun begins. I just need you to hold it in place.” I instruct and Nestor obliges.

“Leah, baby, you want to get risky now? This is how you like it? Damn, mami.” Erik comments, which results in another punch from Nestor.

“Erik, Erik, Erik, you poor, unfortunate soul.” I say as I now lean down to his level as I’m now next to Nestor.

“You see Erik, you thought that you owned me You thought you could do whatever you want to me, that you had a right to violate me, assault me, rape me. YOU WERE WRONG, ERIK! See this, right here…” I explain as I point to the razor blade in my hand, up in sight for everyone to see, ready to use.

“This is what you did to me. You made me resort to this, slicing my own fucking wrists!” I shout as I then dig the blade into Erik’s right wrist that Nestor is holding, and I make sure to drag the first cut as slowly as I can, he needs to feel this.  

“Do you feel anything, Erik? Do you feel the pain? The pain of the sharp edge slicing through your skin to make you bleed? I didn’t. I was numb, ALL BECAUSE OF YOU!”

I’m not done yet, as I finally lift the blade, Erik finally cries out in pain.

I can’t lie, it’s music to my ears.

I go over to his other wrist, and I slice that one too.

“That is all, Nestor. Thank you.” I whisper as I lift up the blade.

I stand back in front of Erik for the final time, “You don’t own me, you sick coward. I fucking own you.” I affirm, and before I part ways for the final time, I spit right in his face before I turn back and walk away.

I take one last moment before I turn my back to him, I look at him in the eyes only this time I have confidence. I got my fucking revenge, Erik will never hurt me again.

Right as I rejoin everyone, Kendra has a smile on her face, and Angel has a smirk on his. Kendra gives me a quick side hug before Angel sneaks me from her, he cups my face and presses his forehead to mine.

“I am so fucking proud of you.” He whispers, and a smile creeps up on my face.

I take another deep breath as I hear footsteps, Chibs and Tig now get their say.

“Erik Rodrigo, you know you fucked up with the Mayans but you should have done some research, brother. You see, Leah is not only protected by the Mayans but by us, SAMCRO.” Chibs announces.

“You see, Leah has been under our protection since she was a teenager. We promised her she would be safe, and that she could rely on us and the Mayans to help her when she needs it. You done fucked that up, but guess what, we’re here to help her now and we’re going to fix this.” Tig tells Erik.

“Chibs, you have that knife on ya?” He asks.

“Knife? Another one?” Erik asks in horror.

Chibs and Tig look at each other, and they both have these wicked smirks plastered on their faces which causes me to smirk.

Kendra gives me a questionable look, I look at her and smile, “They got this.” I tell her, and she continues to hold my hand.

“What is it Erik? Are you scared?” Chibs asks nonchalantly.

Tig takes the knife from Chibs, “You see Erik, you thought you were a tough guy or whatever, when you hurt Leah. Well, newsflash dude, men don’t touch women, and they definitely don’t rape them. Therefore, you don’t deserve a dick.” Tig tells Erik as Chibs helps Erik stand up, and at this moment Erik is screaming in terror.

My stomach starts to flip again, and this is too much for me to handle.

I turn to face Angel and he engulfs me in a hug.

“It’s almost over, babe.” He whispers to me as I shut my eyes and just hug Angel as tight as I can as Erik’s screams grow louder and louder.

Tig’s job is finished when I hear other members gasp and groan, “He really cut his dick off?!” I hear Creeper ask from behind Angel.

I let out a really small and low chuckle, because I know Tig isn’t shy from doing things in a disgusting yet theatric manner.

“Oh Erik, don’t be so dramatic. It’s not like you were going to need that anyway.” I hear Chibs say.

“Is that it?” I hear Bishop ask, and I hear muffled voices in the distance.

I think to myself, I surely hope this is it, I mean Erik is bound to bleed out.

I then hear Chibs clear his throat, “One more thing, from beyond the grave, a message from Jax Teller – be thankful he’s not here to do this instead.” Chibs announces and before I can process everything, I hear a gun shot and then a body drop.

“Gun shot in the forehead. It’s over.” Angel whispers to me.

I slowly lift my head up, and turn around slowly to see the scene that played out behind me.

Sure enough, Erik’s lifeless body is now on the floor.

Chibs slowly walks back, but then looks up and says , “Jackie Boy, I hope you’re proud.”

Marcus walks over to him and shakes his hand, “No doubt in my mind, Jax is very proud. Especially of our Aleeah.” He announces as he now turns to me, and everyone makes way for the guys to gather around me.

“Leah, how are you sweetheart?” Bishop asks.

I take a deep breath, and soak in the moment.

This is all real, Erik is gone…he’s dead.

“It’s weird, like I see that he’s dead but like, it doesn’t feel real.” I admit, and it slowly feels like shock is taking over my body.

“Let’s take you outside for some fresh air, Lee.” EZ speaks up.

I nod my head and EZ, Kendra and Angel take me outside.

“Babe, tell me what you’re thinking.” Angel softly says to me as we reach outside and nightfall is upon us.

I run my hands through my hair, “I don’t know. I honestly don’t know.” I say with a shaky voice again.

Angel hushes me and brings me in for a big hug. “It’s over babe, you’re safe again.” He tells me.

Before I break away from his hug, and I kiss him on the cheek. Angel is taken aback by this move, but he smiles.

I then take a step back and look at Kendra. “Kenz, can I stay with you tonight?” I ask because when I’m feeling like this, the need for best friend time is dire.

I know I’d feel safe with Angel tonight, but right now, my gut is telling me I need my best friend.

“Of course, Lee. You can stay whenever you want.” Kendra says to me.

I turn back to Angel, and I feel bad for not staying with him tonight but I had to remind myself that this isn’t a permanent thing, me staying with him although I want to. “Please don’t be upset that I’m staying with Kendra.” I plead in a whisper, Angel starts shaking his head profusely.

“Leah, stop that. I’m not upset at all, babe. You just did some crazy bad-ass shit tonight, you need rest and you need your best friend. I completely understand. One thing, actually two things…” Angel starts before looking over at EZ, “EZ stays or looks out for the both of you, just to ease my mind and I’m sure Alvarez would want the same thing and secondly, I’ll be over at 9am with coffee and bagels.” He states with another kiss on my forehead.

“That sounds perfect.” I tell him as soon as he moves his lips from me.

Angel and I part ways as EZ takes Kendra and myself back to Kendra’s apartment.

I still feel torn, that I should have just stayed with Angel, but I know I need Kendra tonight.

I need to be smart, if that’s even possible right now.

I can handle my feelings for Angel in the morning, when he brings me a bagel and coffee. For now, I plan on crying to my best friend about the fuckery that just occurred, and I honestly cannot wait to do so.

[raviposting]

Have you done TimeHex for the ship meme? Because I would love that, if you aren't sick of the pairing.

@seiya-starsniper look someone thought I could ever get sick of Time Hex (anon don’t worry, you can send me Time Hex asks whenever). 

insists that they are an awesome dancer even though they’re terrible This is such a Rip thing to do omg. He’ll be fine at formal events but when it comes time to dancing in a relaxed environment, he really just kind of…flops around almost. 

likes to watch reality tv Jonah!!! He’s so interested in reality tv and how people have changed through time. 

He’s very into Cake Boss and practically forces the Legends to do their own Cake Boss challenge on the Waverider. 

refuses to wear pants when they’re home alone Jonahhh. The second he goes on the Waverider and claims it as home he’s just pantless 24/7. 

is the jealous / protective one Rip bb gets so  jealous it hurts, and Jonah finds it really endearing tbh. He’ll always poke Rip in the ribs and go, “You jeeeeeealous?” because he’s a fucking nerd. 

He’s also definitely the protective one bc I’m imagining Rip in the Wild West and he must have gotten through so much trouble I s2g. 

goes all out on the holidays Rip!! He’s passionate about it but tries not to show it, so he’ll either a) Relegate the responsibility to Kendra or b) Go full on holiday mode and use the guise that he’s educating Jonah. 

cries over books RIIIIIIP. Jonah doesn’t get it. Or the appeal of reading, really. 

is terrible with kids Jonah has a 50/50 chance of getting a kid who thinks he’s scary or cool. Rip is good only with his own kid, and other children tend not to listen to him and he’ll be exasperated about 5 seconds later (Exhibit A: The Legends). 

drinks too much caffeine I accept that this is the only reason Rip hasn’t passed out by now. 

could sleep for twenty-four hours straight Again, if Rip were off caffeine, this would be him. 

never wears matching socks Jonah. He doesn’t really like socks much anyway and finds them itchy, so he cares even less about getting matching ones. 

punches a tree when they’re angry Rip’s definitely done this lol 

gets scared by the toaster Jonahhh but he would never admit it. 

[zaritarazi]

for the things we've handed down

read it on my NEW ao3 for @oberynmartell​  -- Kendra has her baby on the day Rip’s mother visits the Waverider, which she announces by gently clutching Rip’s desk with one hand, and her bulging stomach with the other, and softly saying, “Oh. Fuck.”

--

Kendra has her baby on the day Rip’s mother visits the Waverider, which she announces by gently clutching Rip’s desk with one hand, and her bulging stomach with the other, and softly saying, “Oh. Fuck.”

And perhaps, if Rip hadn’t spent the past 72 hours awake, stress-cleaning the Waverider, and perhaps if he hadn’t felt his mother was here to inspect the ship top-down, not to “Pay a simple visit, are you kidding me?” Then perhaps Rip, in all of his infinite sensitivity, would’ve said something other than, “Really, Kendra? Right now?”

To which Kendra, probably because she’s, well, about to give birth, barely manages to scrape together a fairly nasty look before saying, “Wow.”

And Rip has a retort planned, he does, because even the birth of a child is no reason to abandon Sheer Wit- But he is quickly drowned out by Ray, screaming, screaming so, so loudly, “OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD. NOBODY PANIC, I PREPARED FOR THIS.”

Rip has never felt more acutely like panicking in his life. Well. Has never felt more acutely like panicking in, say- The past hour, or so.

“I think,” Kendra says, still in that gentle, strained voice. “That I should get to the medbay.”

And Carter is, really, truly, seriously about to just lift her and carry her there, bridal-style, though that’s no different than Carter any other time, regardless of how in labor Kendra is, but it’s Mother that stops him with the wave of her hand, crosses her arms, and says, “Your office is a far better place to have a baby.”

“Mother,” Rip says. “You really shouldn’t have to see this- Well Kendra is so shy, you know-“ He ignores that look, not just from Kendra but from every single other person on the ship and God, probably. “You shouldn’t have to see her have a baby, it’s really going to be a nightmare, truly-“

“Michael,” his mother says, with that crispness that leaves no room for a discussion. “I have been a midwife for literal centuries. You’re lucky I’m on board today, with your attitude.”

If Rip could die on the spot, he would. Let the newborn baby lead the timeship. Really.

“Your office is cozy and nicely lit and warm,” his mother continues, ignoring the glower Rip has taken on. “Much nicer place to have a baby than your cold little medbay, Michael.”

“But-“ And if he wasn’t so English, he’d probably stomp his foot in protest. “It’s my office.”

“Michael,” she says.

“Right, right,” he mumbles. “Lay on the carpet, Kendra. Let’s have ourselves a baby.”

Kendra lets Ray help her onto the ground, first onto her knees, then gently laying her on her back. “Who is the ours, here, Rip?” Kendra asks, resting her feet on the floor. “Because I’m pretty sure I’m the one who’s water broke in her pants.”

“And you’re getting it on the carpet,” Rip says, like he’ll die from the shock of it. “I mean. Mother. If you could please talk us all through the procedure.”

“Of course,” she says, folding her hands over her stomach. “One or two of you should go get blankets- A good deal of them. One to wrap the baby in, as well. And have the fabricator make something to cover her- Any kind of hospital gown should do.”

Jax, who is still young enough to bear the emotional scars of watching a woman give birth on an 80s VHS tape in ninth grade biology, quickly says, “On it,” before bolting towards the fabricator. Fast walking. His knee didn’t allow for much bolting, but the spirit of it was there.

“And- Miss Saunders, correct?” Mother says.

“Mrs. Saunders-Palmer-Hall,” Ray says, helpfully.

“Lance,” Sara adds.

“Lance,” Ray repeats.

“Yes,” Mother says, not even bothering to flare her nostrils. “If you could roll down your trousers- Though I assume you’ll want to leave your pants on until the blankets come.”

“Um-“ Kendra sort of uselessly lifts her feet, trying to reach for her shoes.

“Right,” Carter says, dropping to the floor beside her. “Right. Sorry, princess. I was- I was caught up in a memory. You know how it goes.”

Kendra lets Sara push the hair off her forehead, wiggling her toes as Carter pulls off her boot. “What memory?”

“The first time we did this,” he says. “When you had Aldus.”

For a moment, there is silence. And Kendra says. “Oh.”

“I’m sorry,” he says. “I thought- I’m trying to-“

“Let’s not make this weirder than it already is,” Len says, leaning in the doorway. “Focus on this baby first, birdbrain.”

“Yeah, so,” Kendra says. “Are uh- Are you all just gonna stand there and watch, or-“

“I was there when Lily was born,” Dr. Stein says. “I thought my services would be needed.”

“You literally got your memories of Lily like, two weeks ago,” Sara says.

“And it’s a good thing I did, Sara,” Dr. Stein adds. “Because now I’m here to help Kendra. Is she breathing properly?”

“Oh my God,” Ray says. “What happens if she breathes wrong?”

“Well, that’s one of you,” Kendra says. “But um- do the rest of you- I mean-“

“I feel like it’s weird to leave if everyone else is staying,” Nate says. “You know?”

“Why don’t I-“ Amaya watches the scene for another moment, then licks her lips. “I’ll get you some water.”

“Thank you,” Kendra says. “I love you.”

And she can feel Amaya grinning, though she’s out of sight.

“Miss Saunders,” Mother offers, moving beside her in Rip’s office. “While I expected something a bit… unorthodox from this team, I do want to forewarn you that when you give birth, you’re going to, well. It can get a bit messy.”

“I’ve eaten her ass,” Mick says. “We’re all friends here.”

“Mick!” Rip shrieks. “In front of my Mother?”

“It’s fine,” Kendra says. “Whatever. They’ve all seen my vagina.”

There’s a murmur of agreement among the group.

“We have,” Sara tells Rip’s mother, and Rip tries very hard to will himself into the void of space.

“I’m the one that did it, though,” Ray says. “I mean- It’s- That’s my baby, in there. I did that.”

“So really, she should be able to walk out of Kendra any minute now,” Len says.

Mother turns her head to look at him, raising a single eyebrow.

“Because he’s got a huge prick,” Mick says.

“Enormous,” Len adds.

“Like, scary big,” Sara says.

“Divine, really,” Carter says.

“It’s THE BEST, OKAY,” Nate says, and only then does Ray flush red.

“This is great,” Kendra says. “This is exactly how I pictured this going.”

“Really?” Sara says.

“I mean, Rip’s mom wasn’t here, but otherwise yeah, pretty much,” Kendra says. “I’m glad you are here, though. Ma’am. It’s nice to have a calm head.”

“I am PERFECTLY calm,” Rip says.

“Don’t throw up until I start crowning, okay?” Kendra says.

“KENDRA.”

“Kendra what,” Amaya says, returning with a glass of water. She joins the group of four already huddled over Kendra, handing her a glass of water.

“Kendra said crowning,” Rip says. “In front of my mother.”

Amaya looks up at him. “The mother that’s right here, helping Kendra give birth?”

“Oh, Michael’s gotten more squeamish as he’s gotten older,” his Mother says. “He’s too English, really.”

“That’s true,” Sara says. “She’s right about that.”

“Ray,” Amaya says, gently lifting Kendra’s head to help her drink. “You’re crying.”

He touches his face. “Am I?”

Kendra slowly guides her hand to cover his, to thumb at the tears spilling down his cheeks. “Ray.”

“I’m happy,” he says. “I’m so- I’m so excited. And I’m just- I don’t think I have words to describe it, Kendra.”

“I love you,” she says, softly.

“I love you too, princess,” he says, taking her hand.

“Oh-“ Kendra wiggles her fingers. “I’d say maybe don’t do that. Hawkstrength. May break your hand.

“Right,” Ray says, moving his hand to her collarbone. “Amaya?”

“Here,” Amaya says, taking Kendra’s hand.

Carter takes her other one and the wordless knowledge of his presence is more than enough.

“Blankets,” Jax says, muffled by what Kendra assumes is more blankets than anyone should carry. “I’ve got blankets.”

“Holy shit, kid,” Mick says, and that starts the shuffling flurry of blankets, and Carter does get to lift her, like he wanted, and she’s pretty sure they’ve made a mattress of blankets by the time they lay her down.

“Aw,” Kendra says. “You got me a pillow.”

“Yeah,” Jax says. “Yeah, of course.”

“You know you don’t have to stay,” Kendra says. “This is… a birth, I mean.”

“Oh, thank God,” Jax says.

“Yep,” Rip says. “Kitchen, Jefferson?”

“Yeah,” Jax says. “Come get us when she’s out!”

“We will!” Sara calls. “God. What babies.”

“Phrasing?” Kendra says.

“Sh,” Sara says. “Lie back and think of Ray’s penis.”

—

Rip, always one for timing and gentle statements, greets Kendra and her newborn baby by saying, “Well. You did it.”

Kendra grins, and he thinks her daughter mirrors it for a moment, even if it’s only by accident. “Yeah,” Kendra says. “It was… interesting.”

“7 out of 10,” Len says.

“How many births have you witnessed?” Sara asks.

“Two,” Len says. “This, and my sister.”

“Well I think it was a 10 out of 10,” Ray says. “Because she’s perfect, and Kendra is perfect.”

“Honestly?” Kendra says. “Like, 2 out of 10, would not recommend for a funtime activity,” Kendra says, rocking the baby in her arms. “Not looking forward to doing it again, but-“ She shrugs.

“Let’s raise this one, shall we?” Rip says. “Before you go having more of them.”

“Oh,” Carter says. “But I’m on the schedule.”

“I honestly can’t tell if you’re joking or not,” Rip says. “And I don’t want to know, because it will just upset me.”

“Let’s all just,” Kendra looks to Carter, something quiet and only known to the two of them. “Let’s just all keep the shenanigans to a light level, right now.”

“Please,” Mother says, still calm and collected. Not a hair out of place. “I’d hate to lock the lot of you in the brig so the baby could sleep.”

“Would you hate that, Mother?” Rip asks.

She gives him a flitting, wry grin, and for a moment he feels terribly homesick, but swallows it. “Of course not, Michael.”

“Ray,” Kendra says. “Would you like to hold her?”

And Ray, who Rip assumes has not stopped crying, who is crying right now, softly, says, “I- Are you sure I should hold her already? She’s so small.”

And in the silence of it, Kendra looks up at him, propped up on blankets and pillows and covered in sweat. “Don’t you want to hold her?”

“Of course,” Ray says. “Just don’t want to- I don’t know. I don’t hold a lot of babies.”

“I do,” Dr. Stein says. “I would, for one, love to hold her.”

“Before Martin runs off with the infant,” Sara says. “Ray. It’s okay.”

Kendra nods in agreement. “How big did you think she’d be, Ray?”

“I-“ Ray wipes his cheek on the back of his hand. “I don’t know.”

“She has your eyes,” Amaya says. “Look!”

“She has Kendra’s face,” Ray says.

“She’s a newborn, honey,” Kendra says.

Ray holds out his arms. Rip thinks he must’ve been kneeling this entire time, that at this point, his back is probably killing him. Rip also doubts Ray notices at all. Wonders if Ray will care about himself ever again, and thinks probably not. “I can just tell,” Ray says. “She looks like her mom.”

“Still Josephine?” Rip asks.

“Yeah,” Kendra says. “She’s still Josephine. Saunders. Palmer. Hall-Lance?”

“We’ll figure that out later,” Carter says, watching Ray take the little baby with a kind of unbridled fondness. “For now, Josephine Saunders.”

“Hi,” Ray says, shifting her in his arms. “Hi. Do you recognize my voice? Do I-“ He stares down at her. “Do you like me?”

“Oh my God,” Sara says. “Ray.”

“Yeah,” Mick says. “That’s about what I expected.”

“Of course she likes you,” Nate says. “Everyone likes you.”

Kendra grins, and it’s kind of sweet and kind of strained from exhaustion. “Ray,” she says. “That’s your daughter. She loves you.”

“You’re sure?” Ray says.

And the entirety of the room responds, “Yes.” Quietly, though. So not to disturb the baby.

“So,” Sara says. “We did remember to build a crib, right?”

“Oh,” Rip says. “No.”

“You heard her,” Len says. “Woman needs a crib. Chop chop.”

“I-“ Rip licks his lower lip. “I put away Jonas’ old crib somewhere on here. When it was- All of us, I mean. What used to be all of us.”

Kendra tilts her head, a sort of quiet common ground blooming between them. “You don’t have to find it.”

“I want to,” Rip says. And Josephine is small, small as Ray said she is, dwarfed by his huge body as he holds her. “She- She should have it.”

When he meets Kendra’s gaze, her eyes are wet. “Thank you,” she says. “For- Everything. I mean.”

He wrings his hands together. “Before I do,” he says. “Could I- Hold her?”

“Hold her,” Jax says. “I’ll go look.”

“Aw,” Kendra says. “You don’t want to hold a baby?”

“I’m good,” Jax teases, and she grins.

Rip settles on the floor beside Ray, taking Josie into his arms. He’d forgotten how light babies were, how little mass she carried in her tiny body. “Oh,” he says, staring into her big, brown eyes. “Hello, Josie.” She stares. He stares back. “Very um. Nice to meet you.”

“Always a natural with children, Michael,” his mother says. “Just like I said you’d be the first time.”

And for some reason that makes him feel like smiling, closed mouthed and throat tight. “Thank you, Mother.”

“She likes you,” Sara says. “See? She thinks you’re warm.”

“Well,” Rip says. “Thank you, Josie.”

She blinks up at him, and he calls it understanding, though he knows she’s far too new for that.

“She is beautiful, Kendra,” Rip says. “Really. I mean it.”

“Beautiful enough to make up for having her in your office?” Kendra teases.

Rip looks down at the baby, and nods. Mostly to himself. “Yes,” Rip says. “She absolutely is.”