#keith vld angst

[ronihilator]

Keith kogane redraw at the family function 🫡 (+ headcanons again)

[mizukkay]

hey mullet.

[erithel]

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[sikuena]

" Drink up baby, look at the stars- I'll kiss you again, between the bars."

[mothmanavenue]

You said, "Forever, " and I almost bought it

[badsongpetey]

My submission for @erithel 's Gone comic contest �� This comic is such moving story of trauma, sacrifice, and love (with a happy ending), and it's been very special to me. She has these reoccurring themes of reflections: how two people can experience the same event very differently; and how trauma can be reflected back at you even after the event is over. Probably the image that hit me the hardest was Lance collapsing in the shower, overwhelmed. It's so real. And the idea of him trying and not being able to take comfort in his element (water), is so poignant. Erithel is an amazing artist. Go read Gone and follow her if you aren't already 🥰

[evi-anxiety]

POV: You're a soldier fighting a war that isn't yours. You quite literally sleep on the battlefield, and you look into space with the hope that one of those stars is your very distant Sun. You might die tomorrow, and you haven't even graduated school yet. But it doesn't matter, because there are thousands of others who perished before learning their own name, and now you must make up for the guilt of even wanting to go home in the first place.

[gwensketch]

lance is teasing again

[heynhay]

I've done the math, there's no solution, we'll never last

[an0nwr1tes]

Galtean Klance you have my heart-

Thinking about Galra Keith who’s slowly becoming more and more Galra and developing weird habits that he just isn’t sure how to deal with and Lance who’s reeling from the fact that he’s now Altean and having no idea what that means or how to deal with it so he set all his attention on Keith.

Lance who’s helping Keith deal with all the weirdness of being half Galra by hesitantly going along with everything Keith needs, because the last he screamed when Keith dropped a freshly killed animal in his lap Keith just looked so sad, and ignoring Allura and Coran as they try showing Lance more about Altean’s.

Lance and Keith’s alien discovery’s and experiences being both so similar and so so different, Lance who’s more or less been forced into this position because he died and Allura healed him and brought him back but not quite right and Keith who finally knows who he is and that he’s not weird or different he’s just Keith.

Keith’s parents loved each other, they loved him and he’s proof of that.

Lance’s death was real and he’s constantly forced to remember that when he looks in the mirror.

Lance who loves Keith and tells him that everyday, Lance who forces Keith to sit in his huge Galra form so he can brush through his fur and make it all shiny.

Keith who loves Lance and presses kisses to each mark under his eyes because he knows how hard it is for Lance to look at them sometimes, Keith who whispers “You’re beautiful,” every morning when they get up and every night before they fall asleep.

Lance who can’t stand too look at himself anymore, who freezes when he catches sight of his white hair and blue marks and has to remind himself that that him.

Keith who finally feels right when he catches sight of his reflection, the mark on his face and the fur and ears in his Galra form and wonders how he ever thought that he was anything but this.

Lance who loves Keith in any form, Keith who loves Lance in any form.

Keith who couldn’t stand his Galra form in the beginning, Lance who approached Coran and Allura for help because he wanted to show Keith that he was perfect as he was.

Keith who goes stiff at the sight of a strangely familiar Galra in the hanger when he gets back from a blade mission, Lance who smiling hesitantly and explains what he’s been doing and Keith is falling in love all over again.

Suddenly the Voltron team is forced to get used to two big Glara’s cuddling on the sofa, Allura attacked them once before they turned back in a panic.

Lance who doesn’t know how to make himself only half Galra so he end up taller than Keith.

Keith who’s all for picking up his large boyfriend and carrying him around, because that’s his boyfriend.

Lance who starts giving Keith little trinkets to keep on him and pretty little hair ties to braid his fur with.

Keith who starts cooking the hunts he brings back with them because Lance doesn’t like his things getting bloody.

Lance who’s doing so well and then he’s in the bathroom and freezes at the sight of himself.

Keith who’s doing so well and then he’s sees someone flinch at the sight of him.

Lance who promises Keith’s that it’s ok and holds his cheeks in his hands and kisses his eyelids, who stays in his Altean form so Keith can wrap himself around him and they can cuddle.

“You’re so precious, how could anyone be scared of you and your cute button nose and your fluffy paws!”

Keith who presses Lance to his chest and counts the beats of his heart with him, who runs his hands down Lance’s side and mutters.

“Can you feel that? See, you’re here with me Lance, you’re alive.”

Just Galtean Klance being each others anchors.

[haibunnyy]

“They were soulmates, ripped apart by the homophobia of their creator. Is this what God does to us?”

Ouch…

[autisticlancemcclain]

The situation starts on the couches of a hotel lobby on a random planet at three-something in the morning, sprawled all over each other, exhausted, as Coran quietly checks them in.

“Hey, Lance,” whispers Keith, from somewhere beside the shoulder he offered. Lance groans, feigning more tiredness than he actually feels, heart racing since Keith first shifted so Lance would have somewhere to rest his head. He has this strange feeling of invasion, even though Keith offered, even though they’ve been in this position dozens of times before. He’s waiting almost for the other shoe to drop.

“Mm-what,” he mumbles, muffled into his roughed shoulder pads, words smushed together.

Keith sighs instead of answering. For half a second Lance tenses. But Keith only shifts again, not pushing Lance off but moving so Lance is pressed closer to him, and then the heat of his breath tickles the shell of Lance’s ear, and he tenses for a whole different reason.

And then there is, inexplicably, the feeling of what must be Keith’s lips, pressed to the side of Lance’s skull, gentle and lingering, and Lance thinks clearly to himself: what the fresh actual and genuine fuck.

“‘M sorry,” says Keith, so quiet it would be impossible to hear were his mouth not one single inch away from Lance’s ear. He kisses again, and he almost sags into the motion, into Lance. “I shouldn’t have been so dismissive of you earlier. I was stressed. I missed you, too.”

Lance opens his mouth. He muffles a choking sound with all of his strength.

“All good in the hood,” he finally manages, and then wants to strangle himself. “We’re — tight, Keithalicious.”

Somewhere, somehow, there is a God, and this God looks upon him with the utmost cruelty, and so Lance suffers, unjustly, every day of his life. He often prays that he will wake up one morning in the absence of a tongue. A hindrance and horrible sacrifice, of course, but one that may be worth the total sum of humiliation he feels so acutely and so frequently by virtue of God’s gift of language.

Shit is just not worth it, sometimes.

Keith’s laugh tickles a little. “I’m glad, sweetheart.” His final kiss is light, more of a peck than anything. He pats Lance’s hip twice before standing. Lance wonders, vaguely, when the hell his hand was in his hip area in the first place, and how the hell he’s supposed to rationalize that somewhere deep in the recesses of his mind. “‘M gonna go help Coran. See you in a few.”

“Yeah,” is what Lance means to say, but unfortunately when he opens his mouth the only sound that escapes is a strange kind of croak, clawing its way out of his throat and withering to death somewhere in the air between them. It may be, he realises with an intense flash of solemnity, the last remaining dredges of his dignity. Rest in fucking peace.

Keith just smiles again (a real one that shows his crooked incisors and crinkles his eyes and makes him looks handsome, not hot or sexy or beautiful but handsome, in a way that genuinely makes Lance weak in the knees) and jogs over to the front desk. Lance watches him place a friendly hand on Coran’s shoulder, leaning in and narrowing his eyes at the paper the front desk worker offers, saying something Lance can’t hear with his Black Paladin face in full force. When he finally manages to wrench his eyes away, he sees the faces of his team, gobsmacked, staring at him with wide eyes and jaws brushing the polished blue tiles.

“What,” Shiro manages eventually, “the fuck.”

“Since fucking when are you two boning!” Pidge adds, shamelessly.

“I thought you had a thing for Allura?” questions Hunk.

Lance’s own jaw snaps shut. His ears burn, worse than they already were, and he glances at the princess only to find her already looking away. Shame burns something fierce in the pit of his stomach. It’s an unwelcome replacement of the butterflies.

“What me and Keith do behind a closed door is none of your business,” Lance says hotly, straightening his shoulders and puffing out his chest ridiculously. His heart pounds. He raises his voice to drown it out. “We had a bonding moment, after all.”

Pidge barks a laugh. The rest of the snorts and giggles soon follow, and soon the team is looking at him in fond exasperation, rolling their eyes and muttering about Lance and his antics. Allura, even, looks him in the face again. The roiling in his stomach doesn’t change, but the pound of his heart is replaced with something bitter on the back of his tongue.

Anything is better than looking ignorant. Even if you look like a fool.

He settles into the corner of the couch — much less comfortable than Keith’s armoured shoulder, somehow — and lets his eyes slide shut, lets the familiar sound of his team quietly conversing and the ambient sound of a public place at night wash over him as he fades into a half-sleep. The same kind of sleep in a car on the way home from a long road trip, late at night; half aware of the movement and murmured sound of your parents’ whispering in front seat, time stretching around you like taffy.

He stirs slowly at the sound of boots hitting the floor, bleary eyes still half-shut. Keith slowly comes back into focus, standing in front of him now. He’s frowning, troubled.

“They booked us two separate rooms,” he explains, pursing his lips at the two keys in his hand.

Lance pauses. “…Yes.”

Keith doesn’t pick up on it. (That, at least, is familiar enough to make Lance smile.)

“You’d think they’d…well, whatever. I suppose it’s fine. I’ll come join you after you’re showered?”

“Keith —”

“I think my room has the bigger bed, actually. You come to mine.” He opens the little envelope thing and pulls out the extra key, sliding it into Lance’s hands. “I’ll bring up your luggage.”

“Keith, I’m not going to —”

Lance stops.

Keith, I’m not going to sleep with you, is what he was going to say. Keith, what the hell. Keith, you’re acting like a pod person. Keith, I don’t understand what’s going on. Keith, everyone is laughing at us and you don’t seem to notice. Or care. Keith, you’re acting like you’re my — boyfriend, or something. Keith, one day ago you didn’t want anything to do with me. Keith, now you can’t seem to get enough of me. Keith, I am going to lose my mind. Keith, Keith, Keith.

“Okay,” Lance says instead, quiet. He turns the key over in his hands. It looks like a regular white hotel key. It feels heavier, somehow. “Okay, I’ll meet you in twenty.”

Keith flashes a quick smile. It, too, is genuine, and Lance lips are quirking up to match before he can think about it.

“Liar. You’ve never taken less than a half hour shower in your life.”

“I have — so.”

Shaking his head, fondness bleeding from him, Keith steps forward, bending down and pressing a gentle kiss to Lance’s forehead. Lance feels all the air exit his body in one huge whoosh.

“I know you, goober. We got all night. Decompress. I’ll check the closet and under the bed before you get there. Don’t take too long.”

Lance stills. He watches after Keith with wide eyes. His heart, finally calmed again, fucking races.

He’s never, not once in his life, told anyone about the — thing. With the — closets, and under the bed. Not one person; not even Hunk.

It’s stupid, is what it is.

But Lance’s older cousin was kind of a — jerk. And when they were kids he would make these freaky fucking paintings with red eyes and smudged faces and — hide them, in Lance’s closet or dresser drawers or under his bed, and convince him they would come to life in the night and posses him, and it was so fucking dumb, but Lance has always been gullible and it used to scare the shit out of him, because he would never know when they would appear and it would just — freak him out. All the time. Unless he checked his entire room once in the daytime before sleeping, he would never be able to fall asleep.

And he’s never fucking — told anyone about that. Because as a kid it was terrifying to say out loud and as he got older it was just embarrassing. But Keith knows, somehow.

Keith knows.

Lance exhales, air whistling sharply from between his teeth, “Whatever. Whatever. You know what? Whatever,” and stomps over to the elevator. “This is — I’m going to shower. And not think. I don’t — whatever.”

He stews the whole way up to his room. He stews as the key doesn’t fucking work in the slot until the fourth try. He stews as he yanks off his armour and flings it into a random corner, relishing in the heavy thud as it hits the wall, hoping it cracks. He stews as he angrily presses all the buttons in the shower and hops in, cussing as he’s assaulted with an onslaught of hot-cold-hot-cold-soap-soap-soap, aggressively blinking away the sting in his eye and cursing the very air molecules around him. He stews the entire fucking forty minute shower, although admittedly he does, by the ten minute mark, start to calm down a little.

By the time he steps onto the bathmat, he’s just — tired.

“Whatever,” he sighs to himself again, but this time it’s more weary than anything. “Just — I guess. Sure. Whatever.”

There’s a fancy complimentary robe folded neatly on the stack of towels. He swallows the lump in his throat, thinking of his beautiful blue one, now ashes with the rest of the castle.

“Whatever,” he repeats to himself, firmly. Eventually he manages to blink the tears away.

The walk to Keith’s room is short, and cold, and probably embarrassing, since he is in a robe and slippers and a twisty shower hat, but he’s too drained to care. Every step is heavy. By the time he manages to slide the key in the lock — this key cooperates, go fucking figure — and shove the heavy door open, he feels…precarious.

Fragile, maybe.

It takes one look from Keith, one flash of soft indigo eyes and bedsheets untucked and folded over like he likes them and a nightlight shining low on the side table, for him to simply burst into tears.

“It has been a long fucking day,” he sobs.

“It sure as shit has,” Keith agrees, opening his arms, and Lance doesn’t bother thinking before collapsing into them, curling into Keith’s lap and tucking under his chin. Keith grips him tightly and squeezes, and it feels so strangely familiar and so perfect that it’s simply too much for Lance to worry about. He does not have the energy. It’s just — too good, and he’s so tired, and if this is all a trick or a dream or anything like that then he’ll handle it in the fucking morning. Right now Keith is warm and he’s a real fucking person offering real fucking affection with absolutely zero strings attached, none of them, and Lance is allowed to have nice things, actually, it’s written right the in paladin handbook, he knows because he wrote it there himself.

He can just — have this one thing.

“Let’s just sleep for a few thousand years,” Keith says, and he sounds exhausted as Lance does.

And if this is a dream than there’s absolutely nothing to lose, and also whatever, truly, so Lance gives fully into every impulse he’s been too ashamed to even admit in his own head and leans up to kiss him squarely on the lips. He is warm and sweet and tastes like toothpaste, and he kisses back without a second of hesitation, and his hands cup the side of Lance’s face and his calloused thumb brushes across his cheekbones, and it’s everything Lance could ever want it to be, and it makes all the horrible everything melt away. So Lance says screw you, universe, and kisses him until he’s too tired to keep his eyes open, and then he tucks in next to him and relishes in his arm over his waist and falls asleep faster than he ever has in his life listening to Keith’s heartbeat.

This is where the situation starts.

———

based on this thread

[fandomfriend33]

okay but what if there is a second space war. and between the two wars, lance completely fell apart and became a shell of who he once was. and then the second war started and slowly he became the determined, flirty, caring person he once was. and what if he hates that about himself. that he chased adrenaline his whole childhood and then he got what he wanted and now he doesnt think he can ever be happy again unless he’s almost dying every day.

what if hes addicted to the way war feels and taking bullets for others and being worshipped by entire galaxies. what if he hopes he dies by the end of this second war because hes afraid of what he’ll spiral to afterwards if he doesnt. because war is a race where only one side gets to win and he knows hes better at getting second place anyway.

what if the two things that changed for the first time in his life during the first war was 1. the war happening and 2. keith being in his life. everyone else he had experienced having them in his life before that, even shiro. what if he knows this and he doesnt know which of the two are the factor that changed his life.

what if keith is going to die and lance decides hed rather lose the war than lose keith. what if he didnt truly know until that moment. what if he knows he’ll probably die saving keith but if he didnt save keith, he might as well have died anyway.

WHAT IF he saves keith and they get to go back to earth and lance doesnt have to feel empty anymore. the competition he chases after never ends because theres always someone there to keep up. theres always keith.

and what if keith feels the exact same way.

[erithel]

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[justaz]

thinking about klance.

keith who is always left behind and abandoned, either voluntarily or not. keith who has trouble trusting people and talking to people and getting along with people and-…keith having trouble with people in general. keith who is used to fending for himself and not relying on anyone bc the two (2) times he’s done that, his parents and shiro (died, left, disappeared), didn’t end well. keith who despite finding shiro again couldn’t help the gap forming between them as his brain and heart insist that something will happen again and shiro being here isn’t permanent. keith being proven right in season 2/3 and being left alone again.

lance who is SO trusting that he comes across as a bit naive. lance who worked hard to get where he is, who studied and practiced day and night to be at the top of the class. lance who always fell short and just missed the cut and ended up a cargo pilot. lance who only excelled once keith was gone but was stuck living in his shadow. despite the fact that iverson was mean to keith, keith was his favorite student and iverson always held a grudge for lance taking his place and was downright cruel to him at times. lance who started a rivalry w keith in his head bc he was determined to prove that he could be better than keith. lance who was moved from blue to red paladin, following after keith yet again. lance who worked hard to prove that he was worthy of being red paladin but always failing bc he was never keith, he was never good enough.

klance who found what they lacked in each other. lance who was there for keith when it seemed like the universe was crumbling down around him. lance who stood by keith’s side and told him what he needed to hear, supporting him being leader and helping lead the team together. keith seeing lance as an equal and relying on him the way lance relied on him. keith who was loved and supported by someone who never left, lance who was seen for who he was and who never doubted him or his place on the team. klance who turned on each other.

keith who turned into what he hated and leaving lance behind. lance who saw keith as weak and selfish for leaving him the team behind. keith who came back to a lance who was so angry and upset, but who never left his side bc lance was just Like That. lance who was so hurt and upset, who said cruel things in the vacuum of space, but keith never saw him as less for it, who never got angry enough to hurt lance back.

at the end of everything, lance searching for keith to sit at his side as they watched the sunset bc lance will always be at keith’s side. keith who told lance how relieved he was and hopeful bc he knows what lance is capable of and how much he needs him. klance being what the other needs, holding each other’s heart in their hands but never taking the opportunities to crush each other. lance who never left keith behind, keith who never saw lance as less despite the vitriol he spat at times.

[mothmanavenue]

i swear i’m only cryptic and machiavellian ‘cause i care