#keep forgetting to post here lol woops

[lushslug]

mafia suiriku

[vxlenst3in]

Drunk!Gojo x fem!reader

!des: gojo drank a little too much and woops. you two ended up in his bed.

wc: 4.3k (my longest one on tumblr yet)

a/n: wrote this like ages ago and thought why not post it as a late birthday post LOL. I honestly didn't read over it again, so if it's bad - oops.

“Geez, you really are a lightweight, huh?” You chuckled out as you listened to Gojo’s confused mumbles. He was only a couple of shots in and already lost his ability to form any sentences. It was quite a sight to watch Satoru Gojo, the strongest sorcerer of his time, get drunk so easily, babbling nonsense, a bright blush covering most of his face. Shoko just glanced over at you two. “Mm’ shutttt…” He answered in an annoyed tone. His arms were hanging down as he was leaning back into the chair, his head was thrown back while he stared at the ceiling.

You have no idea how you even ended up here, considering that only a few days ago Gojo was practically begging you to come along, because he believed that you were a lightweight as well, so he hoped that he wouldn’t be the only one to get drunk that quickly. Even though he hated alcohol, he was really hitting it off tonight. Bottle after bottle of Sake. At first, you were hesitant, but as soon as he mentioned that Shoko and Nanami would be there too, you couldn’t say no anymore.

Nanami had left about an hour ago now, he was very strict about keeping up his sleep schedule. That’s a fact you could never forget about him, ever since you guys met at Jujutsu High about 10 years ago.

Your eyes flicked from Gojo to Shoko as she poured herself another drink. “Let me have another one too!” You say.

- “Still not drunk?” She replied.

- “A bit tipsy, but that’s about it.”

A laugh escaped her mouth while she poured you a drink. You were more of a Whiskey type, while Gojo preferred Sake, whenever he did decide to drink. Your eyes lingered back to Gojo who was now leaning forward to grab another bottle of Sake. Shoko was quick to react, placing the bottle of Sake out of his reach. Getting a pout out of Gojo.

“Awhhhh,” He whined, “Meanieeee~ Y/nnn~~ Say somethin’~” Your eyes widened as he grabbed onto your arm, slightly pulling it in order to get your attention. His hair was a complete mess, no strand of hair was where it was supposed to be. You thought it was rather adorable how he was holding onto your arm like that. You’d be lying to yourself if you said that you didn’t have a crush on him, or at least thought about how he’d look on top of you. Even though you had those thoughts, you never had the time to mention them to him or try to make a move, you were way too busy for all of that. You doubted that he’d even care, considering that he probably has all girls chasing after him, whenever he was not in Jujutsu High.

“Think you’ve had enough, ‘Toru.” You replied. Gojo moved closer to you, still holding onto that arm. He was clinging to you like a cat in heat, rubbing slightly against you. Shoko raised one eyebrow at the sight, before finishing her drink, surprising you. You hadn’t even started drinking yours. “I’ll be taking my leave as well, you’ll be fine?” Shoko said as she put her glass down.

- “Yeah. I don’t know when I’ll get to leave yet, gon’ make sure Satoru is asleep before”

- “Okay.” Her hands were reaching around her, trying to find her coat and bag. A quiet ‘Ah’ escaped her mouth when she found them.

- “Get home safe.” You responded, waving goodbye with your free hand. Shoko just gave you a sweet smile before putting on her coat and checking the pockets to make sure she has everything.

“Byeee Iei-” Hiccup, “-ri.” Gojo responded, now letting go of your arm to wave with both of his hands enthusiastically. Shoko waved back, turning around to walk into the hallway. Shortly after, the click of the front door confirmed that she was gone. Your head was now turned to Gojo who was staring into the dark hallway.

“Shall we get you to bed?” You mentioned, grabbing Gojo’s attention. “Don’t want to sleep…yet.” Another Hiccup. Soft whining left his mouth, basically pleading with the puppy eyes. You chuckled at the sight of him, as you took a few sips from your drink. Normally you hated silence, it was a weird uncomfortable feeling, but right now, you were loving it. The sight of Gojo pleading at you to let him stay up a little longer, while you sip on your Whiskey — hoping that enjoying this last drink wouldn’t cause you any problems later.

This wasn’t like Gojo at all, normally he was always super talkative, confident and flirty in the way he talked to girls. You couldn’t tell if it was because of the alcohol or because of you. The quiet sound of glass hitting wood sounded, as you put your now empty glass on the table. Feeling a little dizzy from the amount of alcohol that you just consumed in such a short amount of time, you decided that it would be best if you went home as well. The only obstacle here was getting Gojo into his bed.

“C’mon now, ‘Toru. You should really sleep, it’s late.” You somewhat repeat. A sigh left Gojo’s mouth, as he unwillingly got up, leaning all of his weight onto you. You tried your hardest to support him, even though you were much smaller than him. Gojo was humming a song while walking with you. You couldn’t guess what song it was, probably just something he had made up in his head. With your free hand, you opened the bedroom door. Gojo swaying left and right next to you, just following you blindly. His eyes were barely open, he could’ve probably fallen asleep while standing. Gojo’s eyes only opened when he felt the bed against him, he hadn’t even realised that you lied him down. “Mhmm… So comfy~” He mumbled while letting his head sink into the pillow. You could finally feel the alcohol from earlier hitting you, dizziness overcoming your head again.

“Sleep well, ‘Toru.” You said while throwing the blanket over him, as you pull it up to his chest you can feel a hand grabbing your wrist. Gojo’s hand. “Hm?” You whisper.

- “Where’s my goodnight kiss?”

- “Good night kiss??!” Your face was now covered in a deep red blush, your legs got weak just at the idea. You weren’t 100% sure if that was what he actually had said, so you decided to wait for confirmation from him. He was drunk, after all, and you didn’t want to take advantage of that. But you could also feel yourself losing more and more control of your mind and actions with each passing second, the Whiskey was starting to get to you.

- “‘M waitin’~” He purred as he pulled on your wrist to get you closer.

Hearing his sweet voice ask that from you got your body burning with heat. You knew if you decided to give in, this night would not end on a ‘Good night kiss’. You knew that if you gave in to this, you’d give in to everything else, every single one of your fantasies, desires, and needs. His gaze was on you, looking you up and down, waiting for your answer. Your eyes met his. Fuck, your eyes met his. The bright blue colour, the dilated pupils, the way he looked at you through his lashes. You knew that he’ll be the death of you someday.

Suddenly you snapped back into reality, remembering his request. Quickly you licked your lips before feeling the nervousness rising in your chest. It wasn’t the first time you had kissed a man, especially not when it comes to those quick kisses. So why? You leaned forward, your face right above his. ‘Just a quick peck on his lips, right?’ You told yourself in your head over and over again, but you couldn’t seem to calm down at all.

One last deep breath, before you leaned down, pressing your lips onto his. You were just about to pull away again and probably die from embarrassment, but only a second later you could feel two big hands cupping your face, pulling you in. His hands were gently squeezing your cheeks as he deepened the kiss. Considering that you weren’t prepared for a kiss longer than a second or two, you ran out of air pretty quick. Gojo wasn’t stupid - no matter how drunk he was, he noticed that you were out of breath and let you pull away, not entirely letting go of your cheeks though. His fingertips were still lingering on your soft skin.

Your lips were only a few inches apart from each other, as you tried to catch your breath you could hear mumbles coming from Gojo.

- “Mm..so soft…more…can’t stop…” He panted, his drunk-tired eyes glancing at your rosy lips.

Before you could realise it, his lips were pressed onto yours again. Instead of the soft kiss you shared before, he decided to be rough with you this time. Still in shock, you decided to just move along, to let him take the lead. Soft pants and groans left Gojo’s mouth. Not pulling away from his lips, you moved the rest of your body onto the bed, you were now on all fours on top of Gojo. His hands wandered from your cheeks down to your waist, tugging at your loose blouse and pulling it up slightly. The soft touch and his cold hands sent shivers down your spine.

In one swift motion, he had you on your back, now underneath him - his lips still on yours. One of his hands was moving up again, pinning your hands above your head, while the other hand remained on your exposed waist. The cool air in Gojo’s bedroom had your body covered in goosebumps. You could feel Gojo’s tongue begging for more at your lips, so without a second thought you granted him access. His tongue immediately started fighting with yours for dominance, the sweet taste of sake mixing with the rather smoky taste of whiskey. The hand that was on your waist slid under your blouse only to feel the soft fabric of your bra, you could hear a quiet chuckle escaping Gojo’s mouth, regardless of your tongues fighting for dominance.

He rested his hand on your bra for a bit, before he pulled away from your lips, a string of saliva connected your mouth with his. Satoru loosened his grip on your pinned up wrists a little, while he unbuttoned your blouse in only a few seconds. His eyes scanned your entire upper body.

- “So.. fuckin’ gorgeous~” He exhaled. You could see the excitement in his eyes. His words sent another shiver down your spine, as your face lit up.

Gojo’s hand finally let go of your wrists, pulling off the blouse before you could even realise it. You lied there like a starfish, not being quite sure where to put your hands or what to do, but Gojo didn’t seem to mind. He was enjoying every second of this, of being able to admire your perfect body, being able to run his hands up and down your body without you saying a word, only sweet whimpers leaving your mouth. Music to his ears. Before even letting you think again, he slid a hand under your back, lifting you with ease. The other hand was undoing your bra. You were surprised by how easily he had undone your bra.

- “Not your first time, huh?” You teased at his actions. A quiet chuckle was his response, you took that as a yes.

He threw your bra into a corner of his room, finding it would be a problem for later. For now, his eyes were focused on your breasts, licking his lips. He removed his hand from your back and let you sink into the bed again. The shy and intoxicated Gojo from earlier seemed to have lost all control over himself as soon as he saw your breasts. A hand immediately started to gently squeeze one of them. His thumb brushing over your nipple, gently rubbing it, in order to get any sounds out of you - which wasn’t necessarily hard, considering that the alcohol from earlier made you even more sensitive than you usually are. You could see a smirk forming on Gojo’s face, while he listened to your quiet whimpers. The spot between your legs was starting to get soaked, only from Gojo touching you so delicately. His other hand started to take care of your other breast, now simultaneously fondling both of them. Biting down on your lip, you tried to suppress any moans. Your eyes that were just roaming around the room, now met Gojo’s face. His eyes were focused on your tits, the way they perfectly fit into his hands, the way your skin felt against his hands. His ears were listening to the sweet sounds, the bulge in his pants growing bigger. His mouth was slightly opened. You’ve never seen a man be so mesmerised by the sight in front of him.

The puddle in between your legs was soaking the bed sheets at this point. As much as you loved Gojo paying so much attention to your chest, you wanted more. You needed more. You bucked your hips up slightly, trying to get the fabric of your panties to rub against your swollen clit. Not even biting your lip could suppress your moans anymore,

- “Ha?” Gojo didn’t waste any time moving his hand down to your lower stomach, pressing it down to keep you from moving. A whine of frustration escaping you. “Gettin’ impatient? Slut.”

His words sent waves of excitement through your body.

- “Please…’Toru… want you to touch me~” You begged. Giving him the sweetest look you could possibly do.

In a blink of a second, your pants were off, leaving you only with your panties on. Gojo slid back a little, kneeling in between your legs. His eyes immediately shifted from your chest to your drenched panties. One hand wandered down, rubbing two fingers against your clothed pussy. A gasp escaped your mouth as you bucked your hips against his hand. An excited look overcame his face.

- “Want me to touch you there, hm?” His fingers were not stopping, while you bucked your hips at them. A whimper was your response.

He suddenly withdrew his fingers, before ripping your panties off. Your face was burning, your senses being so heightened was driving you crazy. You watched Gojo bring your panties closer to his face, to his nose. He groaned when he practically inhaled the scent of your pussy. “Fuck… I’ll keep them as a souvenir, so I have something whenever you’re not around…” His other hand was cupping his bulge, while he continued to sniff your panties. The sight and his words almost made you finish right there and then.

Your exposed cunt was throbbing at the sight as well, the cool air blowing over it made you gasp. Gojo eventually put the panties down, and shifted all his attention back to you.x His eyes now focused on your cunt, licking his lips. Your eyes were following his every move. He moved down - looking at your cunt.

“Mm… such a pretty pussy~ Gon’ ruin it…” He purred before using his thumb to massage your clit - the sudden touch already driving you crazy, quiet gasps and whimpers leaving your lips. A low chuckle coming from Gojo, enjoying your reaction. The bulge in his pants was screaming for some action as well, but he was ignoring that for now. Before you could realise it, he inserted a finger, making you squirm. You already knew that he had pretty long fingers, but actually feeling them caught you off guard. Not long after, a second finger entered you. They weren’t necessarily thick, but definitely long enough to reach those sweet spots you could only dream of. He was aware of his skinny fingers, so in order to get you ready for him, he spread his fingers inside of you. You screamed at the feeling of getting stretched like that. His scissoring motions were rough, but the pain faded quickly, calming you a little.

His fingers were soaked at this point. Your mouth was wide open, whimpering, gasping, moaning, while Gojo thrusted his fingers in and out of you, occasionally curling them, hitting exactly the spot that made you get weak in the knees, that built up that knot in your abdomen more and more. His eyes kept flicking between your pussy and your face, enjoying both sights just equally as much. Not only did he get enjoyment out of looking at your face and cunt, he also loved the sounds you were making - the sounds your drenched cunt was making as his fingers ruined it. Every now and then, you’d catch a glimpse of his face, he looked so pleased while fingering you. It pushed you even closer to the edge.

- “...Ah~ ‘Toru gonna c-” He cut you off by starting to rub your clit again with the thumb on his other hand.

- “Cum for me, Doll.”

That was all you needed to hear to lose all control. Your orgasm hit you hard, Gojo fingered you through it, making you pant and gasp for air. A mischievous grin started to appear on his face. “Good girl.” He said before withdrawing his hands from your cunt. Not letting you catch your breath, his hands grabbed onto your thighs - spreading them even further. His face diving directly into your cunt, sucking and licking up all of your juices. Some satisfied purrs left his lips, sending vibrations through your pussy. The overstimulation was making you whine. His talented tongue was all to keep your jaw dropped, mouth wide open. Looking down at him, you could only see his soft snow-white hair, his face was entirely buried in your pussy. He was eating you out like it was his first meal after days.

Eventually, he pulled away, giving you some time to breathe. His face was a mess, your juices were covering half of it. The dim light in his room was making him look 10 times hotter than usual. Your cunt was throbbing from the orgasm you just experienced. He looked beyond proud.

Gojo’s cock was also throbbing, leaking with precum, ruining his pants and underwear. It was throbbing for you. Your cunt felt so empty, missing the feeling of his digits inside of you — not knowing that the emptiness would get replaced by something way better soon.

While you were still catching your breath, your eyes caught Gojo taking off the sweater he was wearing. All of your attention immediately shifted to him - he knew exactly what he was doing, taking off his sweater so slowly that it was starting to drive you crazy, revealing his fit upper body, flexing his muscles on purpose. You knew very well why girls liked him - why you liked him. The defined abs, the V-line, his muscular arms, the little trail of white hair right above his pants. The last time you had seen him shirtless was on a beach day back when you were still a student in Jujutsu High. His body back then was ridiculous compared to what you were seeing right now. He was watching you from the corner of his eye, smirking to himself.

- “Like the view?”

- “You like yours just as much.”

- “Not wrong.”

The dizziness from earlier never left your mind, your senses never went back to normal again. Quite the opposite actually, it feels like Gojo is just making it worse with every passing second. You were lost in your thoughts, lost at the sight. Something inside of you still hadn’t realised that your fantasies finally came true. Deep inside of you, you were praying that this wasn’t a dream. That you wouldn’t wake in your own bed in a few minutes - which wouldn’t be the first time.

The sound of a zipper brought you back to reality. You weren’t expecting a butt naked Gojo in front of you when you snapped back. Cock fully erect, slightly jumping in excitement, precum dripping out of it. His cock was slightly curved upwards. He used his hand to smear the precum all over his cock, quiet groans already escaping his mouth as he gently stroked it. You could tell he was just as sensitive as you were. Gojo had a tight grip on it, squeezing it with each stroke, his groans getting louder with each stroke. The sight only made the knot in your abdomen build up again. He’d call you pathetic if he knew just how excited that got you. Mumbles, quiet mumbles - ‘fuck’ ‘ah’ ‘ngh~’ ‘mhm..’. His eyes were focused on your body the entire time. One last stroke before he stopped.

He lined up with your cunt, as he rubbed his dick against your folds and clit, slipping the tip in every now and then. Gojo was looking for certain reactions from you, and you did not disappoint him. Quiet screams leaving your lips at the slight stretch of his tip slipping inside.

- “Tell me how badly you want it, sweetheart.” Gojo purred.

Forming a simple sentence has never been this hard in your entire life. Never ever have you struggled so hard to just make other sounds than whimpers. He was an asshole, asking you to beg and then rubbing his dick against your clit even more.

- “...I- fuck~”

- “C’mon… Use those big girl words…”

- “...’Toru please~ I want your- ah~ dick so badly…”

FUCKHe slammed into you, stretching out every inch of your tight cunt. Your back arched immediately, as you pressed the back of your head further into the pillow. You dug your fingernails into the bedsheets. To your surprise, the shock only made you gulp loudly. Gojo gasped when he felt his tip kiss your cervix, only now realising that he had buried himself balls deep inside of you. His hands wandered to your hips, not only to keep you in place, but also to make sure to pull you as far as possible onto his dick. The fingers he had inside of you just a few minutes ago were nothing compared to the girth of his dick. They were nothing compared to the way he made you feel like when he thrusted so roughly yet so lovingly into you. The way his tip gave a little smooch to your cervix with every thrust. The pain that kept on mixing with pleasure was making you go stupid, making you lose every coherent thought in your brain.

slap. slap. slap. slap. slap. slap. slap.At this point you were choking on your own saliva, panting so heavily.

slap. slap. slap. slap. slap. slap. slap.Gojo had this devilish grin on his face as he fucked you stupid, as he fucked you into the point where you wouldn’t even realize your own orgasms anymore. You had no idea how long it has been since a man has fucked you so sincerely, or if it has ever been this intense. Oh how glad you were that you agreed to joining the little drinking ‘party’ tonight. His two hands that were still holding your hips, were no longer just firmly gripping them, he was roughly squeezing them - geez, this would leave marks later.

His thrusts were starting to stutter.

- “Oh fuck…stop…squeezing me…mhm~” The way your walls were clenching around him made him lose the confidence in his thrusts.

Sloppy but still rough thrusts were the aftermath. Sweat was covering his chest and neck, his breathing was getting heavier with each passing second. You couldn’t remember how many orgasms you were in by now - but you could feel the next one building up already. Not only yours, but Gojo’s first for the night.

Gojo suddenly lifted your legs and threw each over his shoulders, hitting a completely different angle from the position switch. Making you gasp out loud. This position was making you see stars, making your eyes roll into the back of your head. A low chuckle escaped Gojo’s mouth at your reaction. He was quite aware of the spot you liked by now. So in order to make you finish with him, he hit it over and over and over again. Making you whine, tears of pleasure starting to run down your cheeks at the overstimulation. Oh, and how the tears turned him on. How this entire sight just made him grow harder with each moment, how it made his dick throb so terribly. How he could finish at any moment looking at this, and how he will pull you with him.

It was starting to get impossible to ignore the knot in your abdomen, only a little more and you’d-

splash

Without any warning you could feel Gojo filling you up, a cry of pleasure escaping your lips. It pushed you over the edge so nicely. The legs that were thrown over his shoulders were shaking by now. As you looked at Gojo, you could only see him panting and almost whimpering. Sweat was running down his forehead. A lovely sight to see regardless.

As he pulled out of you, his eyes watched his seed flow out of your pussy so slowly. “Oh shit~” He hissed.

You chuckled quietly, also catching your breath. His eyes shifted to you, grinning like the asshole he is. You really would’ve liked a warning, but it’s too late for that now anyway. He let your legs down back onto the bed and then leaned forward to press a tender kiss on your lips.

Too exhausted to fight back or even talk about what just happened, you just let it happen. But in the end, what would you even be complaining about?

Guess the alcohol did you justice tonight.

 ©vxlenst3in - do not steal, modify, translate or repost my work.

[sparklelooper]

✦ INTRO POST ✦

HELLO!! intro post for this freak of a creature (meee)

About the blog:

✦ THIS IS A BLOG FOR ME TO POST AND REBLOG FREAKY SHIT (18+!!!) I will block any minors, or blogs without an age indicator (at least have an age range, or "adult" written, else ill block-) pls stay away ty ty yes

✦ The posts will be mainly about my current hyperfixations and the likes!!! please keep that in miiind woop woop

✦ I'm into weird shit so if anything I reblog makes you uncomfortable please just block and move on, thank you~

Tags:

✦ I'll tag my posts appropriately for different levels of freakyyy. The freakiest posts will link to an external site for viewing of the full image, just in case!! lolol

✦ #sparkling n spilling: my general yapping tag!! ✦ #fireworks!!: my art tag!! ✦ #sparkle answers: my ask tag!! ✦ #FREAKY TALK: nsft text tag!! ✦ #vanilla: self-explanatory lolol. Just your normal nsft stuff!! ✦ #spicy: stuff that's typically not vanilla; kinky, or heavy BDSM go into that category ✦ #dead dove do not eat: non-con, gore/eroguro, and other extremes

PLEASE MIND THE TAGS!! they are here for a reason

About me:

✦ I'm a fictionkin! My current "main" kins are Siffrin and Loop! (hence the name lolol) pls dont be afraid to interact tho, i dont bite hehe

✦ I am currently 19 (20 in a month, lets hope i dont forget to edit this post by that time LOL)

✦ I'm either demisexual or ace, and panromantic!!

✦ I project my freaky thoughts on my kins bc it's comforting to me so stay away if you don't like it, for both our sakes!! /nm

aaaand that should be it, thank you for reading~ ✦

[unproduciblesmackdown]

oh lmfao edited to add. the thirty tags are maxed out but i have to work in the wordplay of: call this post-it notes

speaking of [happening to think about, then for a separate reason talk about, the film “stand by me,” an adaptation of the stephen king short story “the body”] last night, & tumblr ads reminding me, i did turn around after listening to the podcast ep extensive, research enhanced analysis / discussion of specifically the book like hey yeah yknow what. i’ll watch the It films; not the miniseries / the one with tim curry, which i saw the first half of but wasn’t really inspired to commit to the latter half. and you Know like yeah i’m truly interested in the choice to build on [stephen king kicking his legs like “whaaat are some Problems kids could have.....um being a girl.....being jewish.....having a stutter.....”] with “what if someone was gay or some shit” like yeah right on, which idk that steve ever wrote into any vaguely primary characters even though it’s markedly made textually relevant. and the cultural alignment for kleinsen enjoyers is still very funny. i forgot about even the arm cast business till halfway through. even the [break it again] joke kind of manifested lmao

anyways the point is i’m like, my two primary modes of [this experience] being expressed via [mad men meme In The Cinema seriously considering the material] and [the shot of that guy in the alternate titanic ending where he’s like ahahahaha throwing his head back and the camera is overhead zooming out a little bit] and the like Oh Hey. This Is All Coming Together? kind of [that madman cinema meme] moment hit in The Second Part because it’s like, it’s Remarkable for a stephen king story to have Adults Who Are Friends. which is where it can be cross referenced with Stand By Me, which is about kids who are friends, but Framed by like, this story is written in the future by the main kid, who wanted to be a writer & now is, mostly about his friendship with this one other kid who was like “hey man you can & should be a writer. believe” and that classic [stephen king High Concept stories] central plot impetus / definition which is “the one where some kids go on a trek to find/see a dead body” and then ending with Adult Main Kid with that classic / standout remark “i never had any friends like the ones i had when i was twelve. god, does anyone?” which is included even in the film via seeing him type it out on bulkier ye old computer terminals while his kid is now twelvish i guess and talking to a friend. after also musing on like, yeah that bestie who hyped me up the most and who i saved in turn, with a gun, tragically died. iunno where those other two kids in the group are, living kind of underwhelming lives out there probably but whatever. lmfao like man i dunno write them a letter, call them, you could do a little digging here and get in touch. but yeah it’s not gonna be Exactly The Same as when you were kids, nor exactly the same as it was when things aligned to have a brief but dramatic adventure, nor when you Could just all spontaneously decide you wanna go walking & camping to find a body & then just up & do that. but like, you can consciously make & maintain friendships i prommy my man lol. like “it’s great when things align so you Happen to have these friends when you’re twelve and you all like offer each other emotional support and can understand each other like nobody else can. but then you Will all just drift apart” like, i mean, will you. you can have friendships beyond what you just Happen to have / hope that the magic alignments will just continue falling into place for you so that those friendships still exist

and probably part of it is that it’s really mostly About the two kids who are friends even though there’s four of them, i.e. the protagonist & the moral support bestie, as well as the fact that this is a short story so there’s presumably only so much time to focus on characters at all really or delve into any setup and bg lore and whatever all else, i dunno. but thinking how it’s like, oh hey, in It it’s kind of its own serendipitous alignment of elements there to be like, here’s a group of adults where it’s peak relevant that they’re friends, for once. because afaik that really just doesn’t happen in sking stories, like, yeah adults kind of have friends but it’s Not Very Deep / it’s just kind of convenience about working together moving plots along & it’s like yeah uh i don’t fucking know i guess we see each other / hang out for dinners or post dinner drinks together or join forces about whatever fucked up shit and just talk about that, mostly....and probably people are just dropping off like flies eventually, the protagonist man of that [sooo many protags who are just some fuckin middle aged guy who’s a writer] type, and it’s also in part just because like, characters don’t really matter that much / have to be particularly distinct / Are Disposable when plenty of the point is to go “was that fucked up or what?” about whatever’s happening, so yknow you go “there was once just some fuckin guy, i dunno, he probably has a wife he’s paternalistically protective of but maybe also resents and maybe a kid or two or something, whatever....” like, being the main character doesn’t really matter, it’s just this avatar through which we are told a story of some fucked up shit and to whomst any fucked up shit can even happen, being other characters also really doesn’t matter

so it’s like huh, stand by me / the body as obviously this Ode To Twelve Year Olds’ Friendship And How Your Emotional Support Of Each Other Defines The Entire Path Of Your Life Though Mostly For The Main Character, Everyone Else Fucked Off Or Whatever like right yeah, but with that difference of how like clearly as an adult this isn’t gonna be about this guy going like “hey yeah where are those still living scamps today,” he’s reminiscing only, he’s talking about how he now doesn’t have any friends like the ones he had when he was twelve....then what changes in It is like, hmm how are these adults where the fact they’re friends actually is peak relevant? how does one remain friends with even Any childhood friends there huh. and then the fact it works out like that is like aha, well it’s because they don’t lmfao. that everyone happens to scatter to the winds at some point when it maybe will eventually rear its head amongst even their own adult guardians like hey, yknow, maybe let’s not live in murderville. or coincidence. whatever. where the point is that like oh also, everyone just magically forgets the goings on as kids including the existence of their friends, but is about to be reminded of them / remember all that, for a specific external reason rather than [adults are like hey let me try getting in touch with that mf] and already plot and magic is relevant to all of this. they’re not going to have gotten together for the shittiest high school reunion if not for the connection of Friendship, this is about adults but it’s about that childhood plotline still, so Twelve Year Olds’ Friendships still stands / is relevant, so we can even fathom these adults having a connection, b/c yes they Didn’t have it as they got older there, but now they’re jumping back into it actually, b/c magic, and because also this is Directly About (Childhood) Trauma which was also like, hey damn, even outside the stephen king oeuvre & its tendencies (solid & wretched), this is also transcending grievances i so often have with Horror, as someone who likes horror and doesn’t like horror but likes horror but doesn’t like it, and just like. questionable employment of [you Are bothering to focus on Character, and their emotional arcs being entirely relevant to the story here] when sometimes it’s like, do you need a story? the strength of horror shorts to just go “was that fucked up or what.” do you need the characters with the emotional arc relevance at all, or is it just a little avatar walking around with enough vague motivation to have / see / make fucked up shit happen? are they particularly characterized to play into some Metaphor, what’s that metaphor, is it shit, is the execution of it shit. and oftentimes Trauma is just like, idk, it’s like well here’s this person’s Weakness, and it being horror that’s more likely to make it into a Fatal Flaw, like way to have trauma you dumbass, if you were so weak as to fail to just get over it already / Overcome it, you just might be killed for it

annoying, shallow and hackneyed, insulting, etc, and it’s also like, the Individual Focused emotional journey like and here this character who’s been weakly propped up by the Stronger people supporting them will have to go through the crucible of being alone, facing down their Issue like their trauma, and getting through it in this big dramatic one and done way so they can finally stop being a pussy and an obstacle to others. or else fuck it up & die. and it’s like do you know how this works lmfao (no) why shouldn’t the support help. why should it Have to go away. why shouldn’t everyone be crowdsourcing their emotional support amongst their group lmao and never needing to “overcome” it Forever, alone. and that’s at least mostly what gets to go on in It lmfao, like, so obviously this is About Childhood Trauma. whereas It = any of the forces that make people act in ways that create, facilitate, or simply passively allow trauma. (or just some shit that really fucks shit up sometimes i guess.) and you have kids who get caught Alone getting got. but then you have a larger group of some twelvish year olds who are like alright fuck this then, and that’s enough to get through it, the same way that naturally in the less magical / more literal realm of their lives, that friend group & joining forces & providing this like actually (relatively) safe and supportive environment amongst themselves is what protects them & makes everyone a lot more of a force to be reckoned with than they are when out / caught on their own. and it just doesn’t happen to be about choosing to write about like, and then all these kids got picked off one by one anyways, despite their efforts, f. which like i guess it could be, but when the Point is so Directly about the emotional support some kids get from each other / that they Are crowdsourcing protection re: their individual vulnerabilities, that wouldn’t really emphasize that Point so much if regardless of the [having a friend group] everyone was fucked anyways. or the fact that like, again, this is About trauma and what can create it and how that can persist and all, the Magic Rules are about the emotional component of it all, when it’s like, oh this just so happens to be a magic murder entity that’s picking off kids but also prefers to torment them and/or like idk takes the route of going “oh you’re gonna hate this” and hooks up their consciousness via usb cable to the zillionth dimension void & then sips their life force through a crazy straw, or, as it would be to clown entities, a normal straw, and i dunno, that if the usb is unplugged vs eternal living death then the torment juice can give people the interdimensional premonition / telepathy across space & probably time shine(tm) like good for them i guess. call that hypervigilance?

and then that like, into the Adults timeline, not only is there this cheat like woops a stephen king story where adults are friends b/c they’ve reconnected the usb cables where the [friends like the ones i had when i was twelve] has now become immediately relevant and active again, i was like, mad man cinema contemplation meme a bit confused going into the second half until i realized some particular fact of the plot And it was slowly like....we’re kind of goofin huh, is this Being Funnier? b/c i mean, the first one wasn’t not ever funny or like otherwise not super solemn & heavy, and also i’m just Used to horror to the point it’s not gonna like bother me probably, i was watching alone and turned off the lights b/c i couldn’t adjust my screen’s lighting levels & the overhead light in here was gonna create glare via the mirror behind me, and i didn’t think anything of it at any point, i had to also be like “@ me, okay stop saying ‘me’ the moment you realize anything [A Scary Moment] is transpiring for no especial reason,” and yknow, it’s like a roller coaster to me, or i’d say like being tickled except actually i hate that one & will start physically fighting lol, where it’s like yeah aaaaaa but it’s fun & i’m Humored really, i’m experiencing the [horror & comedy are two sides of the same coin], when i’m startled or going like oooh that was, to be sure, creepy, it’s still like, ahaha, i’m figuratively tickled, going :] at the screen, i especially liked the same [ooh hehe yeah that’s eerie] type of moments in both halves like yeah very [your standard marble hornets enjoyer] of me....but anyways so then it did take me an extra few moments maybe in the second half like oh is this Markedly More Humorous? oh it is, then....sort of unexpected but then it immediately makes sense and was Fascinating like, oh, this is so In Conversation With the first movie and with the Overall Story here lmao. like, we are illustrating the Perspective Shift, the [kids timeline] is still relevant and defines everything that’s going on, but they Are adults now and That itself is relevant. b/c otherwise it’s like, it Is just the same situation played over again lmfao like damn we were the [kids fight & defeat a murder sewer clown monster] and now we’re the [adults fight & defeat a murder sewer clown monster]. and Of Course It Makes Sense for there to be overall more Drama for the kids, who are more so just living & immersed in their normal lives in that storyline, and of course, Are Kids, where like anything “was that fucked up or what” that’d happen would be more intense & threatening, and sure applying that perspective like, not only “yeah i’m just experiencing some media, but if that was really happening in life that’d be fucked up, if it was happening for real to me, i’d be like, whoa uh oh holy shit aaaa” lmao, and then an Additional layer of “and if i was twelve” like “yeah aaaa oh shit” way compounded by that, naturally. 

but then i’m Also like, listen, i’d be more like halfway through my 27 yr time jump but i’m the adult with cptsd lmao and so i’m Madmen In The Theatreing because of this angle as well, and intrigued, positively, by the uptick in levity about everything. wherein it’s like okay, it’s sure Also true that like, undo the [and if you were twelve] angle, but The Same kind of fucked up shit happening would of course still be like well this sucks, and is startling, to Anyone who’s an adult, right. But Also like, again the way it’s relevant to touch base with the [kids] timeline, because that’s Defining Everything, this isn’t just “and they’re adults which means everyone’s just tougher than they were when they were kids” and That’s That, it’s like, these are adults who were these specific kids with specific experiences vulnerable to and exposed to bonus trauma, and now this is a “time to jump back in to a head on confrontation with that” plotline but As A Group again rather than this being just the story of like any individuals, or just the main kid/guy, who is now to be sure the [the middle aged writer guy of a stephen king story] lmfao, congrats....and you had [repressed memories but like, magically extensively encompassing] as the device here to as what allows for this outlier scenario of like “but how can adults possibly maintain friendships formed organically in their youth? well, they didn’t lol. but now they’re back.” and the past Has to be relevant and freshly Active because again, this Is directly about trauma lol, not just about whatever broader thing and anyone might secretly have this Hangup or two that’ll get them got. and they all Know this lol, this may be some exclusive knowledge more broadly, but this is Not a secret amongst this group of adults like ah yes my marinating issues that nobody suspects i have....which is a bonus to [even though they’re adults in a stephen king story they don’t all or even mostly have to die] and then like, as i am trying to get around to, that it’d be Different being just any adult approaching this as a new situation to them vs being an adult With Trauma(tm) lol like. the way that one might go “well, this would suck for anyone, but i have a different vulnerability b/c [cptsd involving this shit]” but Then Also the resilience that nobody should have to have and it’s technically a “strength” even though then actually people interpret their [lack of honed ability through direct life experience to cope indefinitely with traumatic experiences] as the strength, a la “wow why’s that person put up with that, i wouldn’t stand for it b/c isn’t it So Clearly Bad & Unpleasant?” victim blaming mentality and people “used” to that shit “putting up with” said shit, which other people would throw up their hands like Wow Just No and walk away from. which in turn isn’t a “weakness” lmao like, there’s no moral judgments to being someone w/trauma or someone without it. that people shouldn’t Have to have cptsd or Resilience, of course, but then that they do. i’m certainly relating to like, yeah it’s Magic Rules / Exaggeration the way that only people young enough can detect & deal with this shit directly, the first time around, and then that they still have access to it as adults presumably b/c of that exposure as kids and because [the childhood trauma doesn’t just Go Away b/c you grew up, even though Also people just think that it ought to or like wow so immature or wow you’re Letting it affect you too strongly still, huh] etc. and anyways, relating to like, yeah enjoyed the way some adults would just be cool & generally supportive, but i also only had so much access to such adults, all Through parents or via school where it’s like, yeah but all the adults there have to Make Sure You’re Behaving Properly in various ways that lead to [punitive] ends and if anyone’s being like particularly supportive / understanding that’s a personal individual choice & they’re probably going Above & Beyond. kind of impressed how useless, and actively unhelpful / counterproductive, any adults were later on when i was dealing with it all the more / had it coming to a head in ways lol, didn’t have an epic friend group i hung out with at twelve or ever who Knew Me that well or i shared anything with or got lifechanging emotional support from, but there Were occasions of like, yeah these peers get it, huh. and now with the perspex of [cptsd having adult] it’s like, yeah, i’d have repeated dreams of parents showing up & i start physically fighting them off with like a shovel and shit lmfao. even now when i rarely have dreams ft. like a more general monster / menacing figure, like i did last night, go figure, Dream Me is always like Oh Okay and immediately physically charges them unarmed lmfao. (also had a dream cameo where some guy on a home computer who was making up like building / engineering schematics? was a Wrole like omg hey buddy. unfortunately a limited interaction, that plot got quickly waylaid by the one where i launch myself at some entity. booo) i can be like “ah, here goes the adrenal response” mostly only noticing sometimes when it’s like, my physical tension has gone to the point of [i can notice my legs/knees shaking], i can also Not Notice It / not think of it b/c you know, it’s like this is truly mundane / everyday shit, in the Relative / Comparative way that it can be. it can be stealth mission time to do some ordinary shit like you live in a survival horror game. it can also go “yeah i could very easily see how if, say, there was this manifestation of trauma / the shit that causes/facilitates/sustains/allows it, i’d go sicko mode on that shit just immediate physical attack” lmao. i know if i’m startled it’s like, that can be a) ordinary, and/or b) unpleasant, and probably c) immediately followed by my being ready to go sicko mode, possibly being a bit pissed off lol. like i can’t even be worried like oh no it’s nighttime what if something was menacing. like yeah that’d be scary and suck, i might get got, i’d also immediately be pissed off like fucking try me you asshole. and it’s like, again the way comedy is A Framework, it’s not what happens when a situation is Lighthearted, Unserious, Frivolous, etc. the like, obvious fact like wow people who are funny can be sad? can have had some fucked up, Serious experiences? can even joke about that? like yeah of course humor can be Deliberately Employed To Cope, including to even communicate about shit, where you’re cueing hard like, i’m not necessarily collapsing under the weight of this right now but it’s a reality and when i’m telling you about it with Humor it’s not in turn asking for you to fix it or even do anything about it at all except be listening to / comprehending the info i’m giving you. and that even looking back on shit can be funny To You because it’s just like, sure Elevated and can be a bit absurd. so it’s like oh yeah of course it’d be funnier, in a way characters are aware of & actively interacting with lmfao. like of course any adult would be like “jesus christ. yikes. aaaa” lol while also being more inclined and able to tackle bullshit right off, but Also being specifically an adult with the [this is your childhood trauma] can be like, yes i’m both still affected by and vulnerable to this shit, but i’m Also less vulnerable than some rando might be, actually, and prepared to / more used to this, and able to go “jesus christ yikes aaaa lmfaooo ahaha” about it. like, i feel that lol. 

paragraph break just because that one was getting Extra long: oh and also the matter of Genre Awareness, that this isn’t just some fucked up shit that happens to be scary and fuck your shit up, but this is expressly an antagonist coming after you with the intention to be scary to you, and you Know that, you are aware you’re in a Horror Genre situation lmao, so meta, surely helpful. and sure sometimes i felt the like comedy vs horror; comedy vs drama sometimes didn’t transition perfectly like, my kind of feeling ambivalent at this one point like uhhh is this scene more straightforwardly dramatic? hmm i guess it was. well anyways. but that’s fine, meanwhile continually delighted even to realize like, here we are going over this all again but with this Shifted Perspective / Framework, we’re clearly goofin a bit. and like how i can clap & cheer like ooh yeah that was creepy lmfao, i got Got comedically like idfk dozen times or what all. ahehe....not to mention the [i Am going insane. society] experience of scrungy expression spit take coughing laughter when overlaying [titanic guy going HaHaHaHaHaHaHa XD as the camera lifts away from overhead] upon [mad man serious contemplation of cinema png] while experiencing like wow the gay Text is more textual than i though, more extensive, turns out i had some things to go into entirely afresh without going “oh yeah, i remember what i osmosis’d about this” to then go :0 =0 about, or that i didn’t quite get Everything through osmosising that i did recall, to then spit take about and become titanic guy fifty times over. i Am a bit joker mode, you really just have to be. and laughing about [when stephen king and PPL go “you know this type of guy” and we all go “yeah i guess. i know Of them [possible knowing looks amongst ourselves, or to the camera]” and then they go “you know how they’re—” and then our answers of “maybe like gay or some shit” overlaps with their “just another heterosexual amongst all the rest of us, unless we’re gay, but we’re talking about how all the protagonists we write are cishet i guess?” like. haha. what an alignment, good for everyone in the overlap....oh and i was like ahahaha when the podcast discussion of The Book Specifically nevertheless had one guy knowing the lore already that the stephen king cameo here as Some Secondhand / Pawn Shop Type Place Owner Guy was someone who, in stephe’s (not a typo, making stephe as = steven happen, with particular enunciation of the ph vs v) own written text as the description of That Guy in the book, is like, this gay caricature who is like wearing some mesh or i think they said it said “fishnet” shirt and like clearly reading this gay porn mag. because how else would someone be gay lmfao? how else would you Know you’ve encountered one of them?? lmfao like, a) i also agree with the podcasters who are like, stephe’s a coward for not staying true to that specific description he wrote when cameo’ing as that person, and b) like, people are gay, stephe....but classic matters of [running down a hallway going Noooo and knocking shit down behind you while being chased by [the way stephen king writes about [take your pick] and/or just like, what do you think is going on in life re: [take your pick] exactly, stephen king, i swear] lol)

anyways This has turned into [gif of the guy emphatically pointing at a laptop and also at some unseen listener to this Serious Monologue] because i have endless things to say about anything. the point it it’s like, well hey i think that was remarkably successful re: choosing to have Characters with Emotional Arcs tied to a Metaphor in this horror media, when usually i’m like, the execution of this is so shit that it’s like, just don’t have characters lol, don’t try to make it a metaphor (although you know, difficult for it not to be tied to anything irl, so don’t be unaware of how it Could be), if it’s gonna be this kind of a mess. the fact that like, you can’t have [trauma] be a character weakness fatal flaw that gets them got b/c they weren’t individually Strong Enough, b/c this is All About a) having & interacting with that [trauma] first and foremost and b) how having a group of relationships affects that (helpfully). my pleasant surprise about how like yeah of course you can’t just make the exact same movie again but i wasn’t necessarily expecting a noticeably more outright comedic angle for round two, but duly kinda delighted by it, and that felt very Appropriate and Verisimilitudinous for the new angle of And You’re Completely Grown. that stephen king Rarely writes about relevant friendships and all the more rarely to never writes about relevant friendships between Adults but whoops, that happened here, b/c there was a magical workaround where “drifting apart” was not entirely congruous to the real life literal actual way that’d happen, and b/c the way this is about childhood trauma means that the Rest of that childhood is relevant to adulthood / adult identities, and he ends up with “god, does anyone?” being answered by “yeah, sometimes” lol. and yeah being a deh enjoyer / being haunted byer / analyzer means anytime something is About the connections someone, say a young person for one, might make and how that can be relevant to All Their Issues, i’m sitting up & taking notes like oh ya don’t say. that stephen king shit overall is like, well this is Interesting and i could talk all day but i’m also like, personally more ambivalent and bound to run over like hey stephe i’m shoving you around, bitch. until we form an unlikely, begrudging alliance to instead go after stanley kubrick, then boo the the shining movie, but whatever. the the shining book ending, one of the few things i particularly remember from actually reading that one, is true like, stephen king endings tending to be a hot mess that maybe aren’t super successful but here we are and it was like, why’d it get so goofy all of a sudden lmfao like i’m telling you with the schrodinger’s boiler that’s old and temperamental and if you don’t maintain it it’ll blow up probably, and that the way things end in the book is the [middle aged dime a dozen writer man protag] being possessed by a hotel is like oh fuck me lmfao, not the boiler i can’t maintain myself even though i’m possessing a hotel, it hasn’t been maintained, and then as always in any of these stories things go off the rails and yakety sax starts to play while after hanna barbera cartoon scrambling in place for a second, your haunted hotel avatar starts sprinting to the basement or wherever it was but Too Late, it blows up and the hotel dies kind of. and that’s kinda fun and funny lol but yknow, put it back in. beating up kubrick aside, i’ve seen all of? nigh all of? wasn’t paying much attention. the movie and it’s like oh okay whatever. but as with like [anything stephen king] and my not even being born till the 90s, it’s like, i can’t possibly experience this afresh, we can all agree that surely this is the best known stephen king work b/w book & film adaptation, even among biggies that really just permeate pop culture overall, who can know what i’d think if these things were New and pre [own significant influence on relevant genres / mediums] or also i was a younger reader/viewer at the times as people could often be. but i was like....expression where you scrunch your face up and look to the side like “are you seeing this” bemusement like...this is. fine i guess? it’s not really scary lmfao. and regardless, resurrecting kubrick to beat him up. but on that note it’s also funny that god knows why i ever mentioned the hypothetical of watching the shining once in passing to my mom, it would’ve been humorous / not in earnest b/c no way would i have been suggesting we watch that or even that i had watched it necessarily, so i Think i must’ve just been informing her of some things that were on tv at that moment with some goofy but technically accurate suggestions like that one, and she is a bit indignant like clearly disapproving of the general idea because, as she says, she doesn’t think it’s Right to tell kids they should ever be afraid of their parents. but between “but like. they go axe murder possessed by a hotel mode here, wherein i think it’s very appropriate?” and [someone who watches It and keeps looking into the camera one zillion times / is fascinated by the fact it’s like oh wow, any horror talking about What If You Had Trauma that isn’t like fundamentally misguided throughout and probably egregiously insulting about it] i take a perfectly comedically timed pause and then we freeze frame on my doing a spit take Laugh into my own drink. not actually in the real moment lol, i just Say Nothing and file that one away lmfao

oh and as a little postscript here i want to shoutout my going “just like Watch Your Step in goosebumps the musical the phantom of the auditorium” where it’s like, schrodinger’s warning about how a kid could just up and accidentally die via this trapdoor or like anywhere anytime, but you don’t really realize that b/c you’re kids, but I’m Telling You. and like, he’s right in general to be sure, you can just die, as well as unknowingly right of course like oops yeah some kid did just up and suddenly die via this trapdoor, grimly. and that’s Stand By Me / The Body handshake emoji It, like of course that mortality is ever relevant particularly in horror, but that also it’s like, kids realizing the reality and Proximity of that, like You Can Die, this could be you or could’ve been you. [horror, and it’s middle schoolers] wins again

[catchlalune]

Cold Nights and Coffee

authors note: The feeling is warmth on a cold night with a nice cup of feelings and a shot of trouble. or alternatively; Moon Taeil is whipped

Reader x Barista/Bartender Taeil, best friends Ten and Johnny and cutie Mark

Originally posted: sometime in December of 2018 woops, it’s also posted on my ao3 

word count: 4,480

warnings: alcohol, some dirty dancing, a little jealousy~, slightly suggestive, reader flat out falls on her ass and Ten’s annoying af lol

You regretted taking the chance on taking the last train back home. You were cold, sore, and really really tired. You had an exam in sociology soon and decided that studying with your friends who already took the course would be a great idea. Of course, you didn’t account for the fact that they were several train stops away from your campus and there really wasn’t much studying that got done (but there was a lot of eating, and laughing, and just about everything but studying.) You had just slipped on some ice a few minutes ago and honestly just wanted to crawl into bed and cry a little after a warm meal.

You were at least another twenty minutes from home on foot and the sign for Nouveau Café was looking very inviting. It was one of your favorite places on campus, they had great coffee, decently reliable wifi, some of the most handsome guys you’d ever seen worked there, oh and they were open twenty-four hours. Not that you were into appearances like that but they were all undeniably attractive in a way that was extremely befitting for internet cafe workers. Everyone on campus knew about NCT, Nouveau Cafe Team members were notorious for being attractive, intelligent, and great at customer service. Some things you were greatly craving right about now.

The tinkling of the bells over the door signals your arrival inside and the smell of coffee and the feel of warm air instantly makes you relax. In the back of your mind you know it looks strange to be standing right in front of the threshold with eyes closed but you can’t bring yourself to care too much. Until he says something to you of course.

“Long night?” The man behind the counter smiles at you, he always does and you can hear it in his voice as you hum.

“The longest, please give me something to make it worth it.” You finally open your eyes to give him a response and he chuckles at you.

“Wrong job for that right now, but I’ll see what I can do.” He says it with a smirk on his face and you raise a brow at him as if asking for him to elaborate but he turns from you to start on your order.

“Hey, you don’t usually work so late. What happened to Ten?” You tilt your head at his back and he stops briefly to look back at you then continues as if you hadn’t said anything. Fair enough, that question was probably pretty rude anyway.

You slip into a stool at the countertop and groan at the dull ache on your left side. You weren’t going to be able to walk well tomorrow.

“I’m disappointed, you don’t want to see me?” He asks jokingly but you can see the earnestness in his eyes as he sets down a hot chocolate with extra whipped cream and a warm muffin in front of you.

“Maybe I just wanted to bother my friend, don’t be too jealous.” You stick your tongue out at him before reaching for your muffin. You look around the establishment as you take a bite and note that it’s just as dead as you thought it’d be at 1am on a Wednesday. “Doesn’t it get boring being here all alone?”

“Not really, I’ve got you to keep me company for the time being.” He laughs as you wrinkle your nose up at his corniness. “I’m joking, mostly. I’ve been doing that Soc study guide that’s due on Monday.”

“Shit Taeil, it’s due Monday?!” You nearly choke on the cocoa you were trying to gulp down in order to question him. You hope he’s joking but he just nods and you groan with frustration. You knew you were forgetting something.

“Aw cheer up, how about I make you another hot chocolate and you can give me your email so I can send you what I have so far. We can even study together if you want to.” You thank the heavens for Moon Taeil, he wasn’t really a friend but he sat a few seats away from you in Sociology and always made your coffee just like you liked it so he was always in your good books. This just earned him a thousand more points.

“Seriously?! You’re a lifesaver! Thank you!” You beam at him and take another large gulp of your drink the warmth of it finally seeping into your fingertips.

“No problem! I’ll make the hot cocoa to go for you so you can stay awake on the drive back.” You tilt your head at his statement.

“I didn’t drive here, I walked. Part of the reason I look like hell probably.” You grumble the last part to yourself and roll your shoulder wincing slightly at the deep tug in your muscles.

“You walked...in the cold...at 1 am...when there’s snow outside?” He seemed completely mystified at the idea, it even sounded idiotic to you when he said it like that.

“Actually it’s all ice now, had to learn that the hard way.” You pout and take another bite from your muffin that was starting to get cold. His eyes widen a fraction and he leans closer to you.

“Are you hurt?! I can’t believe you fell on ice!” He sounds so concerned it makes you stop munching and swallow dryly.

“Just my pride mostly, it’s nothing I can’t handle. Don’t worry about it, really.” The fact he was so worried even though he barely knew you were extremely endearing to you.

“Well, I can’t let you walk back, at least not alone. My shift ends in like twenty minutes, I’ll take you back.”

This was now a little less endearing, extremely kind and suspiciously so. You weren’t very inclined to trusting strangers with taking you home. Granted, Taeil wasn’t exactly a complete stranger you couldn’t really say you knew him very well either. He could very well be a serial killer and you wouldn’t know it. Peeking another look at him over the edge of your mug you weigh the pros and cons of your situation. On one hand, he was offering a free ride or at least free company on the walk back, he was trustworthy enough to go off of what Ten’s said about him, he was extremely attractive, and he was going to make you a free drink. On the other hand, as good looking as he was you didn’t know him too well, Ten doesn’t really have the soundest of judgment, and he could very well be trying to kill you.

“You don’t need to feel pressured, honestly. But think about it okay?” He gives you a small smile that makes your heartbeat quicken and then goes back to scribbling in a notebook, probably doing the rest of the study guide you think.

No one else pops in for twenty minutes save for the next employee and you don’t go anywhere. Taeil places your cup of cocoa down on the counter and when you reach for your wallet to pay he shakes his head at you.

“No need, I already paid for it. Besides you really needed it.” His smile looks so genuine and you could already feel the sleep set in fifteen minutes ago, at least that’s what you tell yourself to feel better about what you say next.

“Okay, you’ve convinced me. I’ll let you take me home but just to let you know if you try to kill me I have very strong lungs and can scream very loud.” Your comment makes him (and his coworker) giggle but he nods anyway.

“Okay, I’ll see you later Taeyong.” He waves at the man that takes his place behind the counter and then turns to you. “Ready?”

When you nod he smiles softly and leads you out into the cold, tinkling of the bells above the door signaling your departure.

***

“So you’re coming out with us yeah?” It had currently been a whole week since the last time you set foot in Nouveau Café and you were really about to punch Ten in the throat if he didn’t stop talking to you before you got a cup of your nightly coffee.

Ten was for some reason over the moon about the fact that Taeil drove you home that night and that the two of you essentially studied the entire weekend together when the two if you weren’t working. He had said something about it being fate that he called out from work to practice for his dance midterm but the thought of something like fate made your stomach turn.

“Oh come on! How can you say no to this handsome face?” Ten pouts at you and it takes everything for you not to actually kick him in the shins.

“Why do you even want me to go out so bad? It’s not like you don’t see me every day.” You move your head to try to see the front of the line wondering why the hell it was taking so long. The cafe was never so busy at 8:45 on a Wednesday night before and you were starting to get impatient.

“First of all, this is the first time I’m seeing you face to face in two weeks.” He frowns at you and you look at him in shock. Had it really been so long since you’d seen him? “And second, it’s not just me. Mark and Johnny miss you too! Maybe even Jaehyun.”

“Jaehyun wouldn’t miss me if I was the last person on Earth and he hadn’t spoken to anyone in two years.” You groan and move up in the line, finally, it was moving. You weren’t usually so agitated but you were pretty sure you were going through some sort of coffee withdrawal.

“Touché, speaking of which I would really like to know what’s up with that.” He stops for a second to think about it then shakes his head as if coming back to the task at hand; annoying the hell out of you until you caved. “Anyway, Mark and Johnny miss you too and you definitely need a drink.”

“Yes, I need a drink of this coffee and- oh hi Taeil.” As soon as you see him all the tension leaves your body and you even offer him a small smile. Ten gawfs at you and folds his arms, clearly a little offended your attitude changed so tremendously.

“Hey, the usual right? My shift ends in a few minutes but I’ll make it for you. Jungwoo can you take the next customer?” Taeil gestures for you to move to the side and Ten lets out a sound.

“Hey lovebirds, I’m here too you know. What if I wanted a coffee?” He says it with a mocking pout so you pinch his cheeks with a roll of your eyes. The scene makes Taeil laugh.

“Don’t worry, I’ll make you the usual too. Thai tea right?” When Ten flashes him a smile and nods Taeil turns around to quickly start on the order.

“Ten you don’t even like coffee.” You give him a side-eye and he pouts again but this time for real.

“I like coffee! I just hate fruits.” He takes a straw from out of the dispenser and boops you on the nose with it.

“Literally how could I possibly forget how much you hate fruits? You’re always telling us! Also, how do you hate fruits but like fruit-flavored things? It makes literally no sense. You probably taste like-”

“Honey!” You have to blink twice at his outburst.

“You do not taste like honey and this is not a conversation we should be having in public.” You look around at the people in line and Taeil’s coworker but it doesn’t seem like anyone has heard anything.

“Here you go.” Before Ten can even point out that you were the one to bring it up Taeil sets your drinks down.

“How much is it?” Ten takes the words right out of your mouth and hands his card to Taeil.

“Ten why are you-”

“Now you have to come out.” He smirks at you taking back his card and grabbing your drinks. With a wink, he turns on his heel and you swear you could strangle him.

“Thanks, Taeil, now if you excuse me I have a friend to go beat up.” He shakes his head at you giving you another laugh.

“You better hurry, I hear his bones are made of liquid.”

****

“Literally why did I let you drag me here?” You were not here for it, not the tight clothes Ten made you wear, not the loud music, or the sweat of all the people around you. You really hated clubs.

“We’ve been here for all of five minutes. Besides Johnny and I are gonna by your drinks all night.” He had a good point, as much as you hated the overall ambiance you weren’t really giving the club much a chance. Plus free drinks were always a good thing, you’d been getting lucky lately in that department.

When you see the top of Johnny’s head Ten all but drags you in that direction, politely but forcefully pushing people out of the way with his body. Did there have to be so many people? It just turned 12 am for God Sake.

“Hey, cutie! Haven’t seen you in like a month.” Johnny leans down to give you a hug and you can’t do anything but smile. Of all your guy friends he was probably the one that made you feel the most comfortable.

“I haven’t seen them in like two. Move over.” Mark pushes Johnny away from you playfully and it makes you laugh so you give him an extra squeeze.

“That’s because she’s been too busy ogling over her new-” You elbow Ten in the arm before he can finish his sentence and smile at his wince. Payback for him cutting you off twice earlier.

“He’s talking out of his ass. I’ve just been busy and Sociology has been kicking my ass. If it weren’t for Taeil I’d probably be crying into a glass of cheap wine right now.” Johnny thinks this is funny and grabs a jello shot off of the table to hand to you.

“Ten said you needed some destressing. So, let's destress.” You lift the shot to your lips at his words and finally let loose a little.

Or maybe after five more jello shots, you had let loose a lot. You're sure it’s been at least two hours since you got to the club and all the dancing you’ve been doing with the guys has made the alcohol start to wear off. You tug on Johnny’s shirt and he follows you to the bar helping you to sit in the stool.

“Hey Taeil, whatever she wants just put it on my tab.” The mention of his name has you perking up in your seat and looking up to find him staring down at you with a bemused look. He looked damn good in his bartender outfit almost better than his barista uniform and it made your palms a little sweaty.

“Are you following me?” The alcohol had surely muddled your brain. You didn’t just say that out loud right? The laugh from Johnny assures you that you had just said that out loud and you groan.

“Wait let me try that again. You work here too?” Johnny mutters a smooth under his breath and if you were a little more alert you probably would’ve hit him.

“Yeah, I work here too.” Is Taeil’s reply and he’s laughing again and you really wish you would stop giving him a reason to laugh. “So what will it be gorgeous? Or should I just surprise you?”

“That was the corniest shit you’ve ever said to me ever.” He’s laughing again and Johnny just shakes his head at you. He knew you were bad at flirting but he thought he taught you a little better than this.

“Surprise it is then. I’ve got something I think you’ll like.” Taeil winks at you and you're sure your heart stops beating for a second.

“Okay, you’ve gotta get better at this. Do you need some help?” Johnny yell-whispers at you when Taeil turns his back to make your drink. Had he always had such nice back muscles?

“Help? How?” You tear your gaze away from Taeil for a second to look at Johnny who’s giving you the same smirk Ten did earlier in the café.

“Make him jealous, how else?” Johnny says it like it should be as plain as day to you and maybe it should but you weren’t exactly sure that Taeil was attracted to you. Guys flirt for fun all the time, right?

Johnny notices your apprehension and gives you a reassuring smile. “He’ll be jealous, I promise.” Then he’s on his phone texting someone so you go decide to concentrate on counting how many colored glasses there are on the wall. Six blue, five purple-

“Hey! Getting drinks without us?” Ten slides an arm around your waist and that's when Taeil turns around to set down your drink. It's pretty and looks good but you’re a little wary of trying out new alcohol.

“It’s called Golden Roots. Figured you might want something a bit fruity.” You trust him, the bartender probably knows best. So you raise the glass and take a sip.

“Holy shit that's good.” You close your eyes at the taste of pineapples and lemons. When you open them the boys are watching you so you hold the straw up to Johnny’s mouth. “You try, it's really good.”

He dips his head down to take a sip and lets out a sound of approval. Johnny turns his head to you and licks his lips but you think nothing of it and turn your attention back to Taeil. There's a flicker in Taeil’s eyes you notice and he shifts on his feet.

“How did you make it? Can you teach me?” You ask him but his eyes seem to be more trained on the arm around your waist you’re sure Ten seems to forget about because he’s having some conversation with Mark about how to say things in Thai.

“He can teach you later, I like this song. Let’s go dance?” Johnny takes the drink out your hand and places it down in front of Ten who stops for a second to give him a look. When Johnny nods at him he takes his arm from around your waist and goes back to talking to Mark.

“Okay, if you really want to.” You give in to his request with a simple shrug and he whisks you away. It’s not too far from the bar you have the perfect view of Taeil as he serves some other patrons actually but your more focused on the heat of Johnny’s body behind you.

Johnny’s hands and touches are a little more aggressive than they were at the beginning of the night and he’s grinding more on you then he ever has but you just chalk it up to the alcohol. It’s not like the two of you haven’t gotten drunk and done this before, it just feels a little different this time. But Johnny is a really good dancer and he easily pulls you into his world. The beat of the music is fast and it thrums through your veins just as hot as you feel. Your clothes are sticking to your body again and when you open your eyes you make direct eye contact with Taeil.

His jaw is set and it looks like Ten is saying something to him but he doesn't answer. Just watches you even as you give him a small wave. It confuses you a little but then Johnny is tugging on your chin to look at him and you have to look away.

“I told you I could make him jealous cutie.” Johnny has to lean down to say it in your ear and it takes you a second to process it.

“He doesn’t look jealous to me John, just tired and maybe a little annoyed because of Ten.” Johnny rolls his eyes at you then spins you around so your ass is pressed against his groin. It’s much closer than you’re used to with him and it makes your body feel just a little bit hotter.

“I bet after this you’ll definitely see it.” As if in time with his words the music changes to something much more sensual and it has your body melding to Johnny’s in a way that must look positively sinful.

It feels like an eternity that you and Johnny are out on the dance floor dirty dancing so when you sit back up on the bar you’re more than thankful for the ice that somehow still remains in your drink from earlier. Taeil has disappeared somewhere and the crowd is starting to thin as the early morning hours approach much quicker. You grab at Mark’s phone to take a look at the time and note that it’s nearing 5 am and you’re thankful you don’t have class later.

“Hey, guys I’m getting kind of tired. I think I’m gonna call it a night.” You’re a little disappointed that Taeil left before you could say goodbye but it’s been ten minutes and the only person tending the bar is some guy named Yuta who gave you a glass of cold water when Johnny asked him to. He’s nice and certainly attractive but he’s no Taeil.

“Let me take you home then?” Taeil’s voice makes you whip around startling you at how unhappy it sounds.

“Yeah, okay.”

***

It’s just as cold as it was last week when you fell on ice and your body is feeling just as sore too. Taeil deposited his jacket on your shoulders as the two of you walked to his car and he turned the heat all the way up but it didn’t retract at all to the coldness you felt. You weren’t really sure why but you felt like you’d done something wrong.

Taeil wasn’t talking much save for asking if you need more or less heat and if you were hungry or not. Even though you said no your stomach still growls so he pulled into a drive-through to get you some warm food to eat. His actions are warm but you still feel uncomfortable.

“Hey, are you okay? You’re probably really tired right? I can't believe you work at the bar too.” Taeil doesn't answer you for a second and then he sighs.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just a little tired, that’s all.” You were hoping his words would make you feel a little less tense but they seem to do the opposite.

“Did I do something wrong?” You take a peek at him from your side in the passenger seat and you confirm he looks just as tired as he says he does. But he’s still just as pretty and looking at him makes your heart flutter.

“No, it’s not you at all. It’s just me being stupid.” He speaks with a somber tone that makes you pout.

“Moon Taeil you are not stupid.” You huff at him and he pulls up to your apartment with a grunt.

“Listen, can I talk to you before you go inside?” He seems a little nervous but less tired so you turn to him with a smile his jacket falling off your shoulders a little. His gaze wanders down for half a second before he chews on his lip.

“You can say whatever you want to me Taeil. You could probably curse me out and I’d probably tell you you were right.” You try to lighten the moon with a laugh but he runs a hand through his hair and sighs.

“Can you just be quiet for a second?” He glares at you and it makes you frown but you nod anyway. This causes him to groan again and then he’s leaning on the console that's dividing the two of you.

“No that came out wrong, I don’t want you to stop talking I just...I like you. A lot.” He reaches out towards you then draws his hand back as if he had touched something hot. “I had no idea you and Johnny were a thing before I started flirting with you. I wouldn’t have if I had known that.”

“I-what?” He wasn’t making any sense at all. “Johnny and I aren’t dating? Wait you were flirting with me?!”

Taeil takes a second to look at you before he starts laughing. He’s laughing so hard that his eyes crinkle and a tear rolls down his cheek. You aren’t sure what’s so funny but seeing him so mirthful makes you smile wide too.

“Ten told me you were oblivious but I had no idea it was this bad! I’m sorry it’s just, I’ve been flirting with you since the beginning of the semester.” He’s shaking his head at you again looking at you as if you have stars dancing around your head.

This time when he reaches for you he tugs his jacket back over your shoulders and smiles.

“Let me show you what I mean.” And then he’s kissing you. It’s soft and warm and he tastes like mint. There’s something so casual and comfortable about the way he kisses you but it still manages to take your breath with him when he pulls away. “Do you get it now?”

“I-no not really. I mean I knew you were flirting but I didn’t know you were serious and why did you even think I was dating Johnny? I mean I know we’re close but-” He’s kissing you again this time a bit more firm and it shuts you up or it leaves you gasping like a fish rather.

“Remember when I said I was just being stupid? To be fair though, you were dancing pretty close.” He leans forward more to nuzzle his face into your neck before whispering in your ear. “But if you say yes to being my girlfriend he can’t touch you anymore.”

“But what if I want to give him a hug?” His whispers leave you breathless but the kisses on your neck leave you wanting just a tad more.

“A hug is fine, no dancing.” He runs a hand up the other side of your neck and traces along your bottom lip with his thumb.

“But what if-”

“Shhhh, what did I say about talking?”

“Actually you said you didn’t mean it.” He groans at you and pulls away completely.

“Okay okay! I’ll be quiet,” He turns to look at you then. “But only if you make me.”

“That can be arranged.”

[kouichikimura]

Critrole fic recs pt7

its been a while. i haven’t rec’ed fics in a while. I’ve lost my motivation..woops. A lot of these are caleb not being okay. Thats what got me back to reading lol.

speechless by mnemememory

Caleb’s not doing good. He’s not with us right now. -after ep 87-

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Just Keep Breathing by Anonymouspotato

Another aftermath of ep 87

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a brighter world beyond by tardigradeschool

another aftermath of ep 87

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standing here searching for a monster by UncommonCourtesies

Caleb is outside of Astrid’s door

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The Heavy Weight of Empty Bones by AliceAce14

Caleb dies. Resurrection.

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Don't Take Her From Me by nocturnalstrolls

In which Beau mutilclasses in over to save Jes

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Survival of the Fittest by funnygirlthatbelle13

Caleb and Cad are separated from the others, Caleb is injured. 

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take all that pain and turn it into love by Marmeladeskies

Frumpkin with the Nein

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Burned Out by Hiiraeth (V_eritas)

Beau and Caleb aftermath of ep 77 with the scourger 

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You ain't Heavy (you're my brother) by a_case_for_wonder

Caleb and Beau have a chat (worried beau about seeming and scourger)

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Forgetting is Powerful (But Don't Forget This) by fairytaleslayer

Beau gets feebleminded

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even darkness must pass by dare_to_do_our_duty

Everyones hurt, specially caleb. 

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sharing evenings (cool and quiet) by alittlebitoftheuniverse

Post wedding snuggles with Vesper

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Vigil by GirlwithCurls98

Pike is hurt, everyone watches over

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Beneath the Sun Tree by dorcasdeadowes

Keyleth visits Whitestone and receives a present 

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Daughter to Father by Shriek

Vex brings Velora back home.

Smuts

Pain kinda turns me on by serenityxdragon

Beau/Yasha

[angstymarshmallow]

part three: radio silence (cal lowell x mc)

[ a little note: I can’t seem to stop wanting to write this multi fic series. While the inspiration is hot, indulge my frequent posting. I had to cut it a little short when I did a double-take at the word count lol.  I think I’m mostly okay with where this is because I wanted some SOFT Cal content. Here’s another chapter in let’s see where this takes with some kind of vague conclusion. If you read it - than you! If you leave a comment, bless you! ]

[words counted: 6416]

[summary:  a disgruntled Wren (MC) and Donny aren’t sure where they stand. But an uneasy alliance is struck - as long as they have Cal, they have each other. When Cal returns home - a serious heart-to-heart ensues, but what dangers await them in the aftermath?]

The ride home is long and driven in mostly silence.

For once, Wren is grateful for it. 

Her thoughts are elsewhere. 

They linger on the events of tonight, running through each and every detail like the end of a fine comb. Talking to Cal on the phone. Trying to defuse the tension in the bar. And then failing miserably when she’d punch that domineering asshole in the face. However, it’s not the only thing she thinks about. Cal is suddenly forefront of her mind as she remembers the flash of scorching anger in eyes. Seeing him like that, had gutted her. It cuts too deep, like a knife that leaves an ache in her chest. Her own conflicted feelings of not wanting to leave him alone in that state has stagnated her even more. All of it is painful to remember.

Her concentration fixates on those events and no matter how many times she thinks of them – she wouldn’t change any of it – not if it meant putting Donny at risk.

A loud honk breaks her focus.

Wren blinks, abruptly sitting upright inside the driver’s seat of her car. She’d forgotten the light in front of her had turned green. Flinching, she forces her mind back to the present and drives through the intersection.

There’ll be time to deal with her emotions later. A time to lick and heal her wounds. She’d prefer it anyway that it’s on the side of the couch with her favourite ben and jerry ice cream instead pulling off to the side of the road to cry. Right now, all she can do is will herself to focus and keep it together until she gets home.

She checks the time on her GPS. The clock seems to almost glare obnoxiously back at her and Wren allows an exasperated sigh to escape her throat at the sight. There’s still ten minutes to go.

She fiddles with the music, hoping there will be something on to keep her distracted. But nothing is interesting, nothing provides the kind of relief she’s looking for. Huffing a breath, she shuts the stupid thing off. So much for that.

She sneaks a glance beside her, mildly surprised that Donny has been painstakingly quiet. There have been no snarky remarks since they’ve gotten on the highway, no jab at her for not making the right turn in the split second she should have, no rolling of his eyes when she’d snap back at him – and honestly, Wren almost misses it. It pains her to see him as quiet as he is right now, still clutching his arm and staring somberly out the window of his passenger seat.

Wren’s gaze falls momentarily down the length of his arm and she wonders it’s broken. She’ll have to make a mental note to check on it once they get home, although she knows he’ll heal far quicker from his bruises than she ever can. “You okay there, kid?”

His answer comes in the form of a shrug.

She swallows thinly. “Cool, I just wanted to check on you. I know it’s been a –” But the rest of her words have fallen short. There is nothing she can say to placate him, to put his mind at ease. Lying to him won’t help. Some of it is his fault, some of it is hers’ – mostly it’s everyone’s except for the only person currently dealing with it.

Shit, she shouldn’t have left Cal to deal with this all alone.

Wren sighs, turning her attention back to watching the rain splash nosily across on her windshield. She turns on her wipers shortly after. At least they’re nearly at the end of the highway.

By the time the driveway is within scope and less than a block’s away from their side street, it’s only a few minutes shy to midnight. Time passes between them in silence as Wren parks the car. Neither one of them moves at first. They simply stare at the rain still dropping hasty water across the windshield.

She turns the ignition off and slides out of the car first. He follows soon after, but they are both stumbling to board the steps of their home as Wren searches her pockets for her keys.

A minute passes and then another before she finds them. Her hands are shaking violently and the keys slip between her fingers where they fall with a soft clang on the ground. She blinks, intending to retrieve them but Donny beats her to it.

He mumbles something too low for her to hear underneath his breath. Stilling clinging to his other arm, he awkwardly maneuvers the key inside its hole. He turns it sharply. The door swings open and Donny walks through; pauses for a second before pressing his body against the weight of the door and in doing so, gives Wren ample space to sweep past him.

Shielding her surprise, Wren quickly mutters a word of thanks and watches pensively as he closes the door behind her. “You know, you should let me take a look at that.” She gestures to his arm, “maybe even put some ice on it.”

‘I’ll heal.” His words are clipped, almost dismissive and for a second, Wren can’t help but think all the progress they’ve made has gone to shit. Like his walls have gone up again.

As her eyes search his face, she recognizes the telltale signs – the drop of his shoulders, the fact that he won’t meet her stare head-on. He’s shutting down, pushing her out as his eyes remain glued to the floor.

Then as if realizing what he’s said, Donny shakes his head – shaggy hair flopping by the sudden motion. He shrugs. “I guess it wouldn’t hurt to ice it.”

Smiling a little, Wren clears her throat then orders him to their couch in the living room. She ushers him in the room, pausing at the sight of their couch.

The soft beige is a comfort in more ways than one. Seeing it means sends a jolt of reassurance through her body. She still has people to come back home to. This place is still her home.

It’s exactly what she needed to see. A flurry of images suddenly barrages her mind with memories of being in this house – memories that may have only happened over the course of a few months, but they’re memories she’ll cherish forever.

They are mostly of all three of them – tackling take-out menus and junk food, spending endless hours gaming and arguing while watching their favorite shows. But there are other memories too. Momens when she’s curled up under a blanket with a good book. Memories of Cal; where they’ve spent countless of moments kissing and wrestling one another – pinning the other person against the couch and basking in the afterglow of their love.

Her throat goes dry.

She blinks away the memories and clears her throat to gesture warily at Donny. “Sit, let me get you an icepack. I’ll take care of everything.”.

She only takes a few steps before her right ankle seizes and nearly gives out. Wren stumbles, bracing herself against the wall at the last possible second to stop herself from falling over completely. She sucks in an irritated breath and takes a few more seconds to recollect herself before hobbling the rest of the way.

She knows before yanking her jeans up against the kitchen counter that it’s the ankle Derek squeezed his fingers around. She sighs at the slight discoloration around the area. Yeah. That’s not a good sign.

She knows better than to test how bruised it is by touching it, instead she huffs her breath at the sight of the swelling It’s almost twice the size of her other ankle. She curses.

Pulling her pant leg carefully back down, she cautiously trudges towards the fridge; grabbing the first two icepacks she spots in the freezer. She wraps them in paper towels before moving at a pace languid enough through the hall that she’s prepared to stop whenever there’s too much pressure on her left side.

It isn’t until she’s able to sit on the couch next to Donny that some of the tension escapes from her body. “Alright kid,” she turns to him raises the first icepack with a small smile. “You ready?”

In the minutes she’s left him, his usually olive skin has turned remarkably pale. At first, she thinks it’s because of the pain but in mild surprise – she’s already noticed some of the swelling has gone down.

He shrugs. “It’s not like it’s going to help much.” He hisses out the next words, flinching when she tries to gently grasp his arm. “My bones are remaking themselves.”

Ah, right. Another werewolf thing. Sometimes, she forgets. But she’s also never seen it quite so quickly in action and she wonders if it has anything to do with Donny being younger than Cal. “You’re healing faster than Cal would have.”

He shrugs, “I’m a lot younger. Ow!”

“Sorry.” She knows she isn’t as gentle as she can be from his stab at Cal. Feigning innocence, she apologizes a second time. Unaccustomed to exerting such careful precision, Wren slowly rolls up his jacket the rest of the way and touches the enflamed area again.

He hisses, but doesn’t move away from her gentle prodding.

She sinks the icepack on his arm, bit by bit until his hisses become a small groan of discomfort. “Hey you’re okay.” Her tone is too gentle. It isn’t like her. It’s almost doesn’t like she doesn’t recognize herself. “Don’t be such a big baby.” That’s better.

Donny scowls. “Am not.”

“Are too,” she fires back.

Instead of retorting, Donny tips his head back against the couch and rests his other arm against the back of the beige sofa. “I’m not going to argue with you.”

“Mm, probably for the best. Save your strength and rest.” She presses the icepack there with a little more force and Donny flinches. “Woops, sorry.”

“It’s okay.” A pause. “Hey Wren.”

“Hmm?”

Another pause. “Can I ask you a question?”

Unsure whether she’ll like where this is going, Wren hesitates before nodding. “Sure kid, what’s on your mind?”

“Do you love my brother?”

The question is so unexpected that Wren drops the icepack. It lands with a light thud and for a moment, the air is too quiet – too still for her breathe. She drags a breath back inside her lungs and forces words, where there are none. “I – I think that’s a little hard to explain.”

Donny straightens himself upright and retrieves his arm. He moves it gingerly at first, testing his own strength. “I don’t think it should be. It’s just a yes or no question.”

“Is it?” She shakes her head, bites her lower lip as she glances away. “I think loving someone is more complicated than that. Feelings aren’t something that’s so easily put into words,” she shakes her head. “They’re feelings for a reason, to feel something for someone is to struggle to find a name for it. A word for it.” She glances back at him then, her dark hazel eyes unblinking as he stops fiddling with his arm. “And I have really strong feelings for Cal.”

Donny doesn’t say anything, for a few seconds – neither of them do. He seems to be lost in thought by her words, before nodding suddenly and leaning back to glance up at the ceilings. “I guess that makes sense.” He mumbles.

Wren releases a breath she hadn’t realized she’s been holding when he asked. She hadn’t expected him to understand. “Really?”

“Yeah,” he frowns for a moment. “He doesn’t date a lot – and I just wanted to know where you thought this was going.”

There isn’t an easy answer to that question either.

“For a long time, it’s just been him and me.” He continues, not paying attention to her lack of response. “And I think it’s been…hard, letting someone new in.”

She goes still for a moment, then nods at him to keep going.

“Me being an asshole to you? That’s just me not knowing how to fit you in my life.”

“I know.”

He released a breath, his shoulders sagging in relief. “And Cal’s never done this before.”

“Dated anyone before?” Somehow, she finds that very hard to believe.

Donny shakes his head. “No, I meant been with someone seriously.”

Her throat dries. Wren can only manage some semblance of a smile as her heart leaps to her throat.

“There’s just never been time for it before… so I just had to ask.” His gaze slides to her. “I had to make sure.”

“Message received.” She attempts to make a joke out of it, but her voice cracks.

“I don’t want him getting hurt. It’s the first time he’s opening his heart. He deserves someone that’s gonna do the same.”

There’s something stuck in Wren’s throat. She thinks it’s a lump and tries to swallow it back. If she’s ever had to guess how much the Lowell brothers mean to each other – she wouldn’t have to anymore when it’s clearly written across Donny’s face. He’s just protecting him. “I have no intentions of hurting your brother,” she pauses to add, “not like that.”

Seeming satisfied with her answer, Donny drops his head back again and closes his eyes. “I know I can be a fuck-up sometimes, and I know I don’t always say it.” he hesitates to continue.

“But you really love your brother.” A ghost of a smile touches her lips before she takes the icepack away. With slow caution, she tentatively lifts her leg and places it across their coffee table. Rolling up her jeans, she places it gently by her swollen ankle and hisses. Fuck, it hurts.

“Yeah, sure whatever.” He replies, sounding miffed. Opening his eyes again, he glances away as his cheeks change into a dull red. “And he really cares about you, so I guess that means I gotta care about you too.”

Wren thinks that’s the closest to affection she’ll get from him and takes it in stride. “Well, I’m a little fond of you too kid.”

“I’m sorry I’ve been kind of an ass.”

“I’m sorry you’ve been kind of an ass too.” She repeats, meeting his scowl with a cheeky grin of her own. It falters, and she heaves a sigh. Trying not to overthink it, she touches top of his head and ruffles his hair. “I’m sorry too,” she concedes, dropping her hand. “I know I haven’t always had your best interests at heart either but…sometimes I’m just jealous.”

“Jealous?” He blinks. “Of what? Me and Cal?” His says incredulously.

She shrugs, suddenly feeling squeamish under his disbelieving stare. “Well shit – I mean you two have each other. You’ve always had each other. There’s a bond between you guys that runs so deep…I’ve never had anything like that.” The corner of her lips lift. “I guess what I’m trying to say is Cal loves you too dummy, and even though I take up some space. There’s still plenty room for you.”

Silence.

“…You think he’s mad about –”

“Oh, he’s definitely mad. You are screwed.” She says a-matter-of-factly. “It’s just…I can see that he loves you more than anything else.”

Donny nods. His brow creases as he rubs his chin thoughtfully. “I guess I’m not blind enough to see that we’re kinda lucky to have each other.”

“Mhm.” The pang of jealousy she’s always felt being around them is missing when he speaks, instead she feels a sense of pride that he’s being honest with her. Not wanting to ruin the moment, she drapes the icepack along her ankle then leans back to press her back into their couch. “It’s pretty nice actually.”

“…Do you have any brothers?” His eyes droop a little and he shifts a little closer until he’s able to rest his head on her shoulder. He yawns. “I don’t think I’ve ever asked.”

“Nope,” she murmurs sleepily, bracing a hand at the back of her sofa. Her body is giving up anymore – with all the action over, it’s craving rest. “I’ve always been on my own.”

“Not anymore.”

-

When the door creaks open, Wren is up in nearly an instant. She blinks blearily at the lamp and then at the boy warmly snuggled by her side.

Her entire body seems to recoil back and protest in pain when she tries to move. Her head is pounding. Her arms sore as though she’s finished the work-out of a life, although she’s pretty sure the one tucked around Donny is fast asleep. And when she attempts to gingerly move her ankle, a spark of pain prevents her from completely getting up to check. Okay, not the best news in the world. At least some of the swelling has gone down.

Her eyes trained on the door; she doesn’t allow herself a moment to relax until she hears the sound of his familiar footsteps. “Cal?” She utters softly in the dark.

“Yeah, I’m here.” He responds quietly.

She spots him then, tucked in the corner of the room. His clothes are all battered and there’s a soft limp to his walk across the floor. “Cal what the fuck –” beside her Donny, stirs and she lowers her tone. “What the fuck happened to you?”

He winces. “You should see the other guy.”

There’s blood – dried blood, but it doesn’t look like it belongs to him. He looks tired. Apart from the bruises across his arm and face, she sees the strain – the dark circles and wrinkles of a man that’s struggling not to be broken. “Seriously, not funny.” Her own emotions almost choke her. Taking a ragged breath, she makes room for him on sofa.

A quietness clings to the air around him. He runs his fingers through his hair and doesn’t take the seat. But the look in his eyes changes to tenderness as he steps closer. “You two okay?”

“Donny seems to be mostly healed.” She says, slowly retrieving her arm from around him, being careful not to wake him up. “Don’t pretend not hear my question.”

“But what about you – how are you?”

“I’ve…seen better days.” Her voice shakes and Wren curses inwardly at the sound. “Cal,” she says his name with a little more force, “what happened back there?”

Cal seems to flinch at her words. “Nothing I couldn’t handle.”

“So, we’re keeping secrets from each other now?”

“I – ” He hesitates as Donny stirs and mumbles something beside Wren. “Maybe we should talk upstairs.”

“Here is a good of a place as any.” Wren tries to protest, but at the sudden flash in his eyes she quickly backpedals herself out of demanding it. “Okay.”

“Let me take Donny to bed first. I’ll be right back.” Cal promises. Stepping closer, he bends to gather the younger Lowell in his arms before leaving to take him upstairs.

The second his footsteps disappear; Wren’s mind has started racing. There are too many unanswered questions about the state he’s in – and why he won’t tell her. But he didn’t say the words – we need to talk, right? There’s nothing to worry about.

Then why can’t I stop shaking?

Her nerves. It’s her nerves getting the best of her. Not being able to sit anymore, she tries to stand abruptly and nearly falls over herself in the process. Baring her teeth, she takes her time – half-dragging her ankle with her until she’s able to reach the flight of stairs.

“Wren, hold on!” She hears a strangle noise of alarm inside his throat, and a flurry of rapid steps before he’s suddenly there – scooping her up inside his arms and bringing her to his chest.

“My hero.” She teases.

“How badly are you hurt?” The concern in his eyes makes it hard for her to swallow.

She glances up at him, raises one hand to cup his cheek. “It’s mostly just my ankle.”

“Just your ankle?” He sniffs at the words. “That’s your blood I’m smelling, are you still bleeding anywhere?”

“No, I don’t think so.”

“I’m giving you a hot bathe.” Shaking his head, he cradles her to his chest and takes the stairs one floor at a time.

“You don’t have to -” her protest falls on deaf years, because once Cal’s convinced her safety is in danger, he rarely changes her mind. “I’m fine, Cal. Seriously.”

If he hears her, he doesn’t give any inclination as to such. The door of their bathroom swings wide open and Cal sets her down onto the sink before he starts to undo her shirt.

“I guess there’s no sense in saying anything more huh?”

Silence.

His focus is completely on pulling her shirt over her head.

“And people say I’m stubborn. Geesh.”

Her attempts at lightening the mood, aren’t unfounded. Cal pauses for a second to give her a droll look but at this close – some of the bruises on his face looks worse than she originally thought.

“Cal,” it rolls off the tongue in frustration. “What did they do to you?”

“Nothing that can’t be healed.” He says the words softly, his eyes a mask until he goes back to undressing her. His hands pause by her hair. Gathering her thick and wavy, tawny strands together, he begins to fasten them into one another.

“You’re surprisingly good at this.” She observes, keeping almost completely still.

His brow knits in concentration. “I used to braid Donny’s hair all the time when he was younger. His hair would get in the way of every sport he wanted to play.”

Cal laughs. “Until he decided he wanted to keep it short that is.” Finishing, he drapes the singular heavy braid across her shoulder.

“Wow,” she glanced down in surprise and smiles. “That is actually pretty good.”

“I’ve had a lot of practice,” he beams at her words, cheeks flushing brightly until he gets down on one knee. He pulls her jeans off slowly, and she shivers at the warm contact. When she’s naked, he plants a kiss on her brow before turning his attention on setting the bath.

Wren’s stomach drops at the sight of claw marks on his back.

They aren’t faded like the ones she’s seen countless of times when they’ve been alone together – marks that she’s spent at least a dozen times tracing her fingers over. No, these marks are new. They’re ugly red and ugly across his skin.

Although the blood has been wiped away, the skin is still raw. They cover more than half his back and the sight makes Wren’s eyes sting with tears. Without saying anything, she takes her time to gingerly drop to the floor and step towards him.

The sound of hot water rushes through the pipe before the tub starts filling up. Wren’s fingers touch the hot surface of his skin gently, as if not to scare him.

He flinches, but he doesn’t move away. His hands on the tub clench into tight fists but Cal doesn’t stop her from tracing her fingers over the marks – the bites that stretch across nearly every surface of his back.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t there.” Her words are soft and low. She draws a shaky breath.

“I told you to leave.”

Wren presses her face into his back, being careful not to place too much pressure and splay her hands around his chest. “I knew better than to.”

“Donny needed you.”

“And you needed me.”

He turns in her arms, wincing in a way that lets Wren knows he’s still in pain. And the fact that he’s still hurting over something they’ve done; over something she’s done isn’t new. This isn’t the first time they’ve got Cal in trouble, but she’s never seen him so bruised over it. She’s never seen him look so defeated. And most of all, she’s never seen him look quite as vulnerable as he does now – standing in front of her, with a haunting look in his eyes.

She presses a soft kiss to his bruised jaw, where one of worst of his wounds were. Another kiss by the base of his neck, where she imagines the claw that tried to break the skin and had failed miserably at tearing his flesh away. Then her kiss travels down his back, placing one at a time – lingering in the worst on the worst of his bruises, until every swollen surface of his skin can remember her touch. Her touch and not the people that did this to him.

When she gets to her feet, Cal is shaking. He’s shaking so much that Wren has to place a hand on his bicep for him to focus his attention onto her.

He blinks. A cloud lifts from his chocolate brown eyes. They widen as if a spiral of emotions have clashed together all at once – longing, pain, fear – those are the worst of it all. Those are the ones that linger. His pupils dilate and he’s panting so heavily that his entire body shakes from effort.

And without saying anything, Wren pulls him into her arms.

There’s a soft cry and then a shudder. He buries his face into her neck, drawing quiet breaths while she threads her fingers through his hair in an attempt to console him. She hums softly, and keeps a steady hand to reassure him that she’s here. She’s here and there’s nowhere else she’d rather be, nowhere else’s she’s supposed to go.

He leans heavily into her, nuzzling the side of her neck as Wren continues to mutter nonsensical things by his ear.

When he stands upright again, he looks more in control. More like himself. His eyes are still glassy, but he’s no longer trembling.

She brings her lips to his – kissing the only bruise that’s left.

His response is immediate as his arms scoop her high and press her along the cool surface of the wall in one fluid movement.  Her hands move from his hair to his back, and she runs circles across his skin until he flinches and pulls back.

“Sorry,” she’s breathless when she speaks and Cal cautiously sets her on her feet again.

“No, no. I’m the one who picked you up.” He tries to clear his throat.

Her hands cup his cheek. “Are you going to help me what happened or am I going to keep hounding you for it?”

Without responding, Cal takes her hand and pulls her to the bath. “Let’s get in first.”

Wren concedes with a sigh, stepping gingerly with her left leg until her ankle protests in pain. “Shit,” she retrieves it back. “You go first.”

Eyes flashing with concern, Cal bends and lifts her off her feet.

“This is completely unnecessary,” she grumbles.

“Ssh, let me take care of you.”

Something in her chest flutters. “Alright.” She tries to keep still until he gently sets her down.  Before he’s able to move away completely, she reaches for his wrist. “You didn’t think I wanted a bath alone, did you?”

His teeth flash as he grins. “Honestly, I was hoping you’d say that.” Pulling down his pants and boxers, Wren twists her body to make enough room for him. When his back touches their bathtub, she drapes herself over him and lets out a contented sigh.

“Ugh, why don’t we do this every night?”

“Probably because we never have the time.” He nuzzles her neck before his hands travel down the length of her thighs and dip between them. He scoops a collection of water with both hands and drips the warm water between the valley of her breasts.

She sighs in pleasure. “That feels so good,” she lolls her head back and he takes the opportunity to lick the base of her neck, nibbling gently until she inclines her head a little more to the side and gives him more access to her skin.

“I like making you feel good,” he murmurs, pressing another soft kiss before letting his hands fall between them.

She squirms slightly, when she feels his fingers skim her inner thighs. “Before, you distract us both.” She half turns to him, bracing a hand on the top surface of the tub. “You promised me answers.”

He sighs. “I guess there’s no use putting off it anymore. I just didn’t want to worry you.”

‘I’m always worried when you’re involved.” She counters.

“Before we start, I wanted to apologize.”

It hurts to swallow. “For what?”

“For pushing you aside like that, back at the pub.” He hesitates. “It wasn’t the right call.”

“I know.”

His shoulders relax at her acceptance. “Still, it was a pretty shitty thing to do when you were trying to help. I shouldn’t have lashed out at you like that.”

“Hey, no one has infinite patience.” She tries to lighten the mood, “if you didn’t react like that – I’d think something was wrong with you.”

He laughs and it’s a pleasant sound that fills the room. “You’re only human Cal,” at the raise of her eyebrows, she quickly adds. “You know what I mean – you’re a werewolf sure, but you’ve still got feelings like the rest of us. Like me.” She snuggles a little closer, bumping her forehead into is. “I’m sorry we made such a mess of tonight.”

“Yeah. Well.” Another sigh.

“You can’t even lie about it.” She winces. “It’s….that bad, huh?”

“Let’s just say, the kind of money we’re paying in repairs is gonna set us waaaaay back.”

“Ouch. How bad are we talking – like no binges on video games and food?”

He makes a face. “Worse.”

“��.No vacation then?”

“Not unless your dream vacation is staying at home.”

“Staycations can be pretty cool.” She smiles, “especially when I’ve got the best person in the world to share it with.”

He nuzzles her cheek. “Sweet-talker.” He teases. He nips her a little harder than she’s used to and her stomach flips.

“But that isn’t the only bad news is it.” Her hands drift to skim the bruises across his shoulders. “Who did this? Was it that douchebag – ”

“That werewolf at the bar earlier – ”

“Douchebag? Yeah that’s what I said. The one that demanded all that cash after Donny lost.” How can she forget? She did deck him a couple of times and was starting to have the blisters on her knuckles to prove it.”

“Derek.”

“Right douchebag, we’re on the same page.”

His lips quirk into a small smile. “It wasn’t about the money – not really. He was sent to the pub on purpose.”

Wren didn’t like the sound of that. Her intuition had been right to suspect something.

“He had a message for me,” the smile drops and Cal buries his lips between her neck again for comfort. A few seconds pass until his gaze shifts to stare up at her. “From his alpha.”

“Oh,” Wren sits up a little straighter in the tub, causing him to jerk back. “I’m not going to like the sound of this, am I?” Before he’s able to respond, she adds. “This doesn’t have anything to do with those werewolves that have shown up recently, do they?”

He gives her a look. “The very same. Apparently, they’re from his pack.”

“Well shit.” Her brows furrow. “I’m not sure I understand. Can werewolves just…leave?”

“They can’t, usually being in a pack is something you’re either born into or brought into the fold. To leave is to….” He stops short, as though searching for the right words. “It’s like abandoning your own family.”

“Then why did they abandon their own family?”

Cal leans his head back against the wall. “That’s what I’m trying to find out. I thought they told me they left of their own violation, that their alpha demanded they leave.”

“Maybe it goes a lot deeper than that.”

“Maybe it does,” he agrees. “Maybe their alpha was doing something they didn’t like.” He closes his eyes for a moment, “it’s one thing if they’re here for their own reasons. But it’s another if his pack keeps showing up around town and making trouble.” Opening his eyes again, Cal grimaces.

“Then we’ll have to do something about it.” She nods. It’s the only logical explanation. They can’t have what happened tonight be a regular thing. There’s still a lot of innocent people – supernaturals and humans alike that shouldn’t be in the middle of this – whatever this was.

“We?” He looks taken aback.

“Yes, we.” She snaps. “Do you think I’d just let you endanger yourself like that and not try and protect you?”

“Wren –”

She points a finger to chest. “I’m not backing off on this.”

“It’s dangerous.”

“So? The whole world is dangerous!” She throws a hand in exasperation, letting some of the water spill out onto the floor. “It sounds like you’re in a lot of trouble or you’re going to be and I won’t just idly by and let anything happen to you.” To drive her point home, she bumps her forehead with his. “Not if I can help it anyway.”

“This is werewolf business.” Cal protests weakly. He doesn’t say it as a way to deter her – she knows he means well when he says it. He’s emphasizing the risk.

But she doesn’t need him to. She knows how dangerous it is. She’s mostly human and nearly everyone else she knows mostly isn’t.  Still, that isn’t going to stop her. Not when it comes him.

“I don’t mean it to be a dick. You can handle your own. But this….this…I don’t know what I’m walking into.” His dark eyes search her face, “and I don’t want you to get hurt because we have no idea what we’re up against. I have to protect you.”

“I’m your mate, remember? It’s my job to protect you too.”

His eyes go a little wide as if she’d struck him by surprise with her choice of words. Then as though a veil has been lifted – his eyes darken and change; the slight flecks of dark chocolate simmer and his winsome smile warms her from inside and out – even before he erases the inches between them to capture her lips.

Her fingers thread through his hair, pulling him impossibly closer – kissing him with as much ferocity as she can – showing him how much he means to her, even if the words he’s always wanted her to say without acknowledging it remains lodged in her throat.

She sinks her teeth inside his lower lip, drawing a moan from his mouth. “No matter what Cal, I’m with you. I’m always with you.”

“Good,” he drags his mouth long enough to peer down at her. To really look at her. Sometimes she swears she’s able to see down to the very depths of his soul.

“Because I have a feeling this is only the very beginning.”

-

By the time they’ve finished their bath, Wren steps on her tip-toes to dry all the water out of Cal’s hair. It always surprises him how much pleasure she takes from doing such a simple task and if he’d ask her – she wouldn’t know how to explain. There’s something almost irresistible about wanting to run her fingers through his soft hair, and as his girlfriend it’s something she indulges in frequently.

Luckily for her, instead of asking – Cal merely amuses her by bending down and adjusting his impassive and sinewy frame to give her enough room for her fingers to fiddle in his hair. Then he simply returns the favor. He orders her to turn around, drops a few kisses across her bare shoulders before spending the next couple minutes to untangle her braid and dry her hair.

Usually hair-drying takes them a little over half an hour and gives them ample time to prepare for bed. It isn’t unless they become distracted by each other; when their wandering hands choose to explore instead of sleep does that half an hour becomes much longer.

This is one of those times.

Cal has pinned her against the door and busies himself with trailing kisses down her neck before the sound someone knocking startles them apart.

“Hey! This is an emergency!”

Cal fumbles to wrap a towel around Wren’s body and she snickers as he ties his around his lean waist. “You think this is decent enough for him?”

“You’re going to turn him blind.” Wren’s tone is almost deadpanned as she fights a smile.

Shaking his head, Cal takes her hand and in the other opens the handle a smidge to peer down at an impatient Donny waiting a few inches away. “Hey buddy.”

Donny’s glare would be more convincing if his hair hadn’t been mussed and if he hadn’t been in a pair of mismatched pajamas.

Seriously, the kid can be so adorable sometimes.

“I need to go, and you two are wasting all this time talking to me.”

“Sorry, kid.” Wren pops out behind him, managing some semblance of a smile despite how quickly he drops his gaze to the floor.

Without waiting for a response, Cal leads Wren down the hall – both mumbling another apology as Donny slams the door shut behind him.

By the time they’ve made it to their bedroom, Cal clutches his side as his laugh shakes his entire body and Wren presses her palms to her cheeks as tears threaten to fall. “Oh my god! Did you see his face? He was so mad!”

“It would have been worse if we didn’t have our towels with us. Then he’d have been really blind.” The last of their laughter trickles out of the room and Cal rubs his temples. “Maybe it’s time we worked on a second bathroom.”

Wren snorts in agreement. “Definitely would be preferable than running into Donny in the middle of the night.”

“But while we’re here….” He loosens her towel and drops it by their feet. “Let me take care of you.”

Her fingers snake around his waist, and without waiting for him to make a move – she undoes his towel. A silent thrill runs through as her eyes rake him over.

“Like what you see?” His voice is low and husky, taunting her with a wicked smile.

“I do,” using both ends of the towel, she lifts the material past his hips, past his shoulders until they rest around his neck. She pulls him close with both ends, greedily finding his lips. “And you’re all mine tonight.”

-

[makeste]

some asks about BnHA 241 and 240 and then some random other asks

I agree with this completely, anon (especially given his attitude throughout the rest of the chapter), but I didn’t edit my initial response since I think there’s a good likelihood that he still deadpanned the line despite being 100% sincere. one could say he was Accidentally Sarcastic. anyways yeah, Todoroki Shouto is a disaster more at 11. 

(but also, he’s totally right and Bakugou is in full-blown denial over their blossoming friendship. because he already decided that they’re Not Friends, and thus he has to actively work to maintain that status now. which Todoroki is making very difficult these days! can you fucking do your part to keep the fucking rivalry going, Icy-Hot?? can you at least try?? why does he have to do all the work. sometimes he forgets for a moment and Todo catches him off guard and he responds normally without thinking and doesn’t realize it until later, and god. why is everything and everyone so stupid.)

I have not forgotten (though I did mix up Pixie-Bob with Mandalay though woop)! and that annoyed me too. we only have like six female pros out there as it is. why do half of them (looking at you too, Midnight) have to be mildly sex-crazed. I know it’s not serious and they’re not actually being serious, but still, is it really asking so much to get some female pros whose eccentricities are less specifically tailored to common male fantasies. you’re a fucking hero Pixie-Bob! you’re a fucking earthbender and you’re hot as heck. why are you so worried about not being able to Get A Man. with Mt. Lady it at least fits more with her general personality from what we’ve seen, I guess. anyways, y’all know I love like 98% of this series, but this is part of the 2%, so. it is what it is.

Tomura is Endgame Thanos, a.k.a. the most sinister and most genuinely frightening of the Thanoses. this really isn’t on track to end well sob.

ah, my bad. (regardless, it was still dramatic af.)

I think she’s a six-year-old (?? she seems six-ish, idk) girl who was terrified of her father and trying to stay under his radar (which was frankly the smart thing to do based on what we’ve seen), and was trying to teach her younger brother how to do the same, and I don’t blame her at all for throwing Tenko under the bus (if that’s indeed what happened); I’m sure she just panicked and didn’t mean it. she’s just a kid. -- was just a kid. anyways she was super cute and would have made a fucking awesome hero, and her death is easily the one I’m still the most raw about out of that whole fucking nightmare. I’m not getting over that. I want her to still be alive; at one point I was convinced of a conspiracy theory that AFO had secretly spared her too (because two Shimura heirs to manipulate are better than one), and Tomura only believed that she was dead due to his fragmented memories. but that seems less likely post-chapter 236.

so yeah, I’m still very upset about this. she was good and kind and loved her brother and had a lot of spirit and she did not even remotely deserve what happened to her.

thank you so much!! one of the best parts of fandom is interacting with other people and reading everyone’s different takes and theories. lord knows I miss a lot of stuff when I read, even when I’m trying very hard to pay attention. so I love when other people point stuff out and bring up ideas I hadn’t thought about.

also! without exception, every single person I’ve ever interacted with in this fandom on tumblr has been polite and courteous and civil as fuck, even on the occasions when we disagree, and I absolutely can’t take credit for that. people are just cool. so thank you everyone. (and particular shoutout to @thequietmanno1, who for some reason I can’t tag, but whom this ask is almost certainly referring to specifically.)

lmao anon this made my fucking day. thank you!!

all right, here goes!

a) this is possible for sure in that as a rule, I never put anything past AFO, and I don’t doubt for a second he’d be capable of this. but, it would kind of suck though. specifically it would suck for Tomura, who’s only just starting to come into his own at long last, and who has gone through quite a lot to get to this point. like, that would be devastating to see him reduced to a literal puppet after all of that. and if it did happen, I don’t know what the odds would be of him actually being “saved” after that (All Might at least would try, but I can’t see anyone else being concerned enough to bother. well except for the rest of the League, come to think of it. that could be interesting), and I’d be really sad if that ended up being how he went out. these things usually don’t end up working out too well for the body snatchee.

plus, this also hinges on whether or not AFO is capable of transferring his quirk to Tomura’s body. if not, there’s no way he’d take the tradeoff, regardless of how powerful Tomura’s own quirk has become at this point. that would just be a really bad deal. like trading the cow for beans, except these ones aren’t even magic beans, just like. normal beans. but if he does have a way of transferring the AFO quirk, then yeah. although he could take anyone’s body then if that was the case, and I can think of a few targets who just might be even more tempting than his protege. All Might’s protege, for one. ...you know what, this line of thinking is starting to get a little too horrifying so let’s move on to the other theory lol.

(b) a few people have mentioned the Shimura Momo theory to me, but to be totally honest, I can’t see much of a logical basis for it other than them bearing a slight resemblance and having similar hairstyles. Inko has also been brought up as potentially being related to Nana for the same reasons. it’d be cool, no doubt, but for me, I need more evidence than just that. I just don’t see how this would advance the plot or the characters’ storylines in any meaningful way. I guess it could potentially tie Momo in more to the central plot, but it’d be kind of a weird way to do it, idk.

then again I’m one to talk, because until fairly recently I was on board with Hagakure of all people turning out to be a Shimura (Hana, to be specific). she’s the traitor, she’s invisible, we never did find out what Hana’s quirk was, and this would mean that Hana was still alive this whole time which would be GREAT, because seriously fuck you Horikoshi!! but yeah that doesn’t seem likely now either. dammit.

anyway, so I’ll just say that both of these theories are possible, but for me personally, in order to be sold on a specific theory I need to be able to see how it logically fits within the storyline and how it moves the story forward. like, Dabi being Todoroki Touya is something I’m 100% on board with, because that’s an established mystery in the series (who is Touya, what happened to him, who is Dabi, etc.), and Dabi fits into place with the evidence we have, and it gives us a lot of Todoroki drama and gives Endeavor and Shouto a personal connection to the Leagu... Pliff. but for something like the Momo theory, I would need there to be some indication that there’s a third sibling we don’t know about, and some hinting about there being more to Momo’s past than we know, and right now I don’t see either of those things, so it’s hard to get on board. hopefully that makes sense.

anon I really like that you phrased this as an inevitability lol. (and I am 100% on board.)

assuming this happens at the very end of the series, I like to think Tomura and the rest of his gang will manage to “escape” the heroes (“oh no... Tomura... he’s getting away... this is awful... somebody stop him” meanwhile no one is making even the slightest effort to move lol), at which point they will live the rest of their lives happily ever after as Lovable Outlaws and All-Around Scamps. like, maybe they’ll still commit some crimes, but they won’t be like serious crimes or anything. they’ll have more of a Guardians of the Galaxy vibe, maybe. I want them to be happy and I don’t want them to go to jail even though they’re teeeeeeeechnically murderers, I GUESS (look, nobody’s perfect!!). but maybe they steal the occasional priceless artifact and inadvertently wind up saving the world. seems like the best compromise.

lol I don’t know what this means either. like in the way a Youtuber has their own brand?? or like Frito-Lays. idk all I really do is talk a lot about an extremely popular manga, so I don’t think that’d really count?? I’m fine with this just being a little tumblr discussion blog haha.

so I’ve gotten like a half dozen asks and messages about this lol. (someone actually told me a very specific detail about said past! so just to remind everyone, I’m spoiler-free on Vigilantes right now guys, I’m sorry. I know it’s no fun.) I regret to admit that I still have not yet gotten around to it. I don’t know what it is, but I’m having a lot of trouble reading new stuff right now. I tried to start the other new BnHA spin-off which @temperatezone told me about (and btw no I did not know about it, so thank you!!) (and also! BnHA has THREE SEPARATE FUCKING SPIN-OFFS right now, how fucking crazy is that. like, I don’t want to accuse a manga series of literally trying to take over the world, but!! seriously that’s just insane), which has an amazing premise, but I haven’t had time/been in the right mindset to start that yet either. it sucks. I’m sorry. I’m working on it. ;;

press f to pay respects to what could have been, guys. they literally had it all. class, an ironic acronym, you name it. and now it’s just PLF. the Iron Patriot of villain organization names.

[ahgaru]

[Day6 Fic] Don't Stop The Rain

Who missed me on Tumblr? Lol. No one, ofc. But in case you were one of the Once/Twice series readers (That Young K x Reader fic, Once is a coincidence twice is not), or you don't read on other platforms where I posted this (ao3 or aff), here's another Day6 fic. Only this time, it's Jae x Reader. And I'm not sure if it'd be as good as the other but hope you'll enjoy.

Pairing: Jae x Reader (Fluff) Word count: 2,271 Characters: Day6 members, minor mention of Got7

I remembered an anime scene the moment I woke up with the guy and girl sharing umbrella, then I saw a twitter post right after that a rain + umbrella is romantic but.... What if the guy isn't kind at all to share his umbrella with you? 

Chapter 1: Umbrella

It's frustrating when it's raining and you don't have your umbrella with you. But that frustrating moment could turn into a romantic one when there's an attractive guy holding an umbrella beside you--like those in books, movies or dramas, where the guy would offer to share his umbrella. A new love could bloom--or not.

"Aw man, it's raining real hard," the silver-haired guy utters after a groan before glancing at you "You don't have an umbrella?"

"Huh?" you flip your head to look at him, a bit startled, and you can't help but adore his tiny eyes covered by his silver hair. He tilts his head waiting for an answer "Uh, no," you shyly respond with a hope of him to offer his, or at least share it with you.

"That sucks," he just shrugs before looking ahead again and finally taking a step out of the shed.

"What the actual--" confounded with what just happened, you try to gather every ounce of self-restraint to not throw a shoe on him "What a jerk"

Letting out a sharp breath, you hug yourself because it's getting cold and step back so you won't get wet from the rain. You look up to the gloomy sky as you bite your lower lip to stop it from quivering.

It's been almost 10 minutes and you're still hugging yourself, looking down as you wait for the rain to stop.

"Hey! Here," you suddenly heard a not-so-familiar voice. Looking up, you see the stranger from before towering over you with his left arm stretched, holding a spare umbrella.

Maybe he's not a jerk after all. Trying to hide the small smile on your face, you gesture a small bow of gratitude before stretching an arm to reach for the umbrella. "Thank--"

"Woops," he pulls back his arm before you could even have contact with the umbrella. "It's not for free, though" Your forehead furrows "Nothing's free in this world, Lady"

You exhale a sharp breath of surrender before rolling your eyes, "Fine. How much should I pay you for it?"

"Uh-uh", he moves his left index finger left to right as a 'no', "I don't like money. How about a coffee? Since it's cold anyway. Oh! But I don't usually drink coffee. How about a lobster, maybe?"

You squint your eyes in disbelief, "Foget it" A lobster for an umbrella? Man, that's an expensive exchange. I take back what I said. He's really a jerk. A total jerk.

"Okay, then how about chicken? There's a nearby chicken place over there. And I swear, I swear, Man, their chicken is to die for"

"Why don't you just die for it then?"

He shrugs, "I'm sure I'm not the one who'd be dead if I can't go home tonight. I don't have anything important with me that need not to get wet," he eyes the folder, between your chest and arms, containing a lot of files that you need to attend to later. Mr. Park, your boss, would surely kill you if you won’t finish the revisions and of course, if you get those drafts wet and damaged. “I’ll go ahead then.” He says before he turns to take a step away from the shed.

Making a tighter grip on the folder, you take the offer, “Fine! Chicken it is.”

With a wide smile painted on the stranger’s face, he turns around and paces back to finally give you the umbrella he got from a convenience store, a few-minute walk away from the park you’re at.

You walk behind him, struggling a bit with your things, while he, on the other hand, is humming cheerfully as he take small steps with his free hand in his pocket. You glare at him with every bit of annoyance from your system. He doesn’t have a plan on helping me, does he?

“Stop glaring, Missy. I can feel you shooting daggers on me.” He chortles softly “Remember, I just saved your little ass”

“Whatever! And F.Y.I. Mister, my ass ain’t little”

With a smirk on his face, he looks at you over his shoulder, his eyes travel from your head to feet and finally rested on your face. Your eyebrows furrow more.

“Can you not?!”

He sniggers causing his shoulders to move (and causing your stomach to flip and your blood rushing) as he finally faces you and walk towards your side. Your raise a brow and he answers it with a shrug.

“Go,” he motions you to continue walking “I’ll walk beside you. You might go elsewhere to escape if I walk before you.”

Rolling your eyes for how many times now, you sigh and start walking again. The edge of his lips raises again as he take a glance on you without you noticing. He’s so tall that you need to tilt your head almost 75 degrees just to look at his face when he’s just a feet away from you.

He suddenly takes the folder from you which causes your eyes to widen in surprise.

“You walk so slowly. And you might drop these papers and blame it on me and won’t give me that chicken that I want”

You scoff. He’s just so unbelievable, isn’t he? But somehow, you didn’t regret going to the chicken place with him because, yes, he’s actually telling the truth. Their chicken is really to die for.

You both keep eating and your mind becomes busy on thinking of whether to ask anything, say something or just continue to be quiet. You eye him not so subtly and you can’t help but curb yourself from smiling. He looks like a kid enjoying his favorite meal.

You also don’t know if it’s a relief or not that he isn’t saying anything either. You’re about to open your mouth to say something—maybe to ask his name, whether he lives around—but he stands up and utter his thanks before winking at you.

“Gotta go. Next time again”

“There won’t be any next time

He shrugs “We don’t know anything about that. Who knows? We might see each other tomorrow again and the next day after that, and the day after, and the—“

“Whatever. Just go”

He beams, even his eyes are smiling, which causes your heart to make a loud thump. What the heck was that? He mouths ‘See you’ before finally leaving the place.

You finally let go of the breath you don’t know you were holding. You put a hand on your chest and feel that your heartbeat is beating wildly. Why does he need to be cute? You shake your head to erase the thought. No, that’s not right. I mean, why does he need to be a jerk?

“I—“, you get startled by the sudden voice and there he is again standing beside the table. He looks at you a bit with mirth from being surprised. You exhale sharply before glaring at him. “I forgot to tell you, just in case you’ll try finding it later, I’ll take the umbrella with me. It’s stopped raining anyway"

With mouth agape, you just look at his back, your eyes following him as he walks towards the exit. You shake your head again. He’s really unbelievable.

After taking a shower, you take a seat in front of your computer. As if on cue, your phone rings. Your boss is calling you to tell you that he’ll give you until before you live for work tomorrow for the revisions instead of giving it to him first thing in the morning.

You didn’t have a chance to speak because he ended the call right after he told you his concern. You stare at your laptop for a minute, trying to absorb what just happened. You take your phone again to call someone.

“Wonpil!” You exclaim the moment the person on the other line answered “Mr. Park extended my deadline for the revision. And he told me to just rest tonight.”

There was a long pause before he utters a word, “Mr. Park? The Park Sungjin?”

“Yes. He gave me until before I leave for work tomorrow.” A cough can be heard from the other line. You’re pretty sure that Wonpil, your Animator best friend who also works in JYPSoft, is surprised by what he just heard. The CEO, Mr. Park Sungjin, can be approachable and nice but for him, a deadline is a deadline.

“For real?” He confirms in disbelief “But the 3D artists need your concept tomorrow for them to start modeling the characters”

“I—I don’t know. Shall I just ignore it and work for it tonight instead of resting like he said?”

“Yes.”

With a sigh, you called another person.

“Dowoonie,” you bite your lip for a second “Did Mr. Park call you?”

“Nope. Why?”

“Aren’t you going to work with the characters tomorrow for the new game we’re making?”

“Yes. And the non-organic modelers will also do the assets. We would also like to start right away so they’d be textured and give them to the riggers so the animators could work on them as early as possible, too. Why? What’s the matter? You’re having a hard time with the concept revisions?"

You let out a long sigh before shaking your head as if he can see you. “No, no. It’s nothing. Anyway, thank you. I’ll hang up now.”

Forgetting about the call, you pick up the stylus and move the drawing tablet closer to you.

Scratch.

Scratch.

Scratch.

Erase.

Scratch.

Flip.

Scratch.

You groan as you put your stylus down and slump your upper body and arms on the table. Without permission, someone’s face enters your mind. That slender young man, with his mischievous smile, silver hair, tiny eyes—his overall features that make him look as if he jumped straight out of a comic.

You sit back straight and move the drawing tablet away. You take a blank paper and a pencil and start scribbling. Your hand moves as if it knows exactly what it needs to do. Sometimes, you feel more comfortable drawing traditionally than digitally. You feel more of you are invested to it. That’s why every time an idea comes to mind, paper and pen are your best partners.

You start striding towards Mr. Park’s office the moment you dropped your things on your desk. He is quite surprised to see you peeking through his office door.

“You still have until 5pm. What makes you come here?”

“I’m actually done already, Sir”

He furrows his brows and motions you to continue. You walk towards his table and place the revised concepts. When he sees the first page, his eyes squint before he takes a look at you.

“Why does this character seem familiar?”

Your heart suddenly starts beating fast. “Pardon, Sir?”

Mr. Park just smirks and shakes his head. He… smirked? “You can go rest for today. You can go to the Rec room, grab some coffee, have a date or whatever”

“Sir…?”

He lands a glance on you again. This time it’s a firm glance. “You heard me. Now, go before I change my mind”

The moment you step out of his office, you go straight to Wonpil right away to tell him what just had happened.

“He told you to go to the Recreational Room, where you can play or chill, when you actually need to meet a deadline today?” He asks “Are you sure? I mean, yes, we can go to the Rec Room anytime we want especially when we need our minds to rest and gather some creativity but not on the day of the deadline. You know that”

“Exactly! That’s why it’s weird. He even told me that I can go grab some coffee or have a date or whatever”

Wonpil suddenly grabs your arm and leans closer to you to whisper, “Maybe he likes you? And maybe he’s hoping you’d ask him for coffee?”

“What? That’s ridiculous, Pil”

Brushing aside your best friend’s remark, you spend the day trying to work on more concepts even when you don’t know if your revisions were already approved or need a few more revisions again. The CEO didn’t tell you anything. And it’s almost time for you to leave work but he hasn’t called you for more modification or change. Maybe it was approved?

 You open your bag and check your stuff, taking the umbrella out of your bag, getting it ready just in case it’s raining again. You don’t exactly hate the monsoon season. You don’t really dislike the rain either. It’s just that, sometimes, it really is a hassle.

You are about to leave your desk, bag already slung, when Wonpil calls your attention causing you to put your umbrella on your desk.

“Dowoon said they’ve already worked on with the new characters for the Fortday. So I think the new concepts were approved?” He shows an assuring smile before tapping your back “Now, go ahead. I’ll stay for a little bit more”

You happily walk out of the building. You’re only strolling for 3 minutes but it’s already starting to rain. You halt for a bit, look up to the murky sky and heave a sigh. You open your bag to get your umbrella but it’s nowhere to be found. That’s when you realize, you forgot to get it back from your table. With another sigh, you walk fast towards the shed where you also took covering from the rain yesterday.

“Told ‘ya! We’ll meet again”, the silver-haired asserts with a smug.

Chapter 2: Chicken

Also on: * AsianFanfics * archiveofourown * twitter

Fics masterlist: Daelisix’s Fics

[hmsannlett]

Re: Hewlett/Abe in Our Man in York - Oh yes, I cannot forget Hew's voice and expression when he corrects Abe's assumption. 💔It was sorrowful, but not livid. I didn't realize that his response could've had more bite to it, but I think you're right! And you've pointed out another reason why he could forgive Anna - he was willing to work with Abe again who literally tried to kill him; Anna never aimed to kill him, but chose to save him. Many thanks for the pep talk! 🤗 TBC...

Woops! I forgot my tumblr catchphrase! Hi, there! Anon here! Since there are many 'anons' on tumblr, I try to introduce myself with some consistency on your blog. Honestly, it's so so helpful and appreciated when you share your character analysis of Hew! 🙏 It helps me to sort through my own ideas, and I feel less unsure of myself in the writing process. Also, thank you for pointing me in the direction of great metas/articles/interviews! TBC...

I forgot to mention I have read the metas on Puckity's AO3 & they were very thought provoking (& validating!) I too noticed that TURN articles have been scrubbed from their page, but will keep looking. TBC...

Re: your latest oneshot; I try to avoid reading any content which is on the heavier side of T, but I did read the preview you posted here, and oh! Your prose is poetically CINEMATIC & the metaphor of yawning gulf has once again proven that Annlett telepathy is real! Ugh, it's so poignantly beautiful! 😢 Until next time, wishing you much joy & peace my friend! 🤍

My shipper heart looks for any tiny crumbs of hope. Hope springs eternal etc., etc. :D

(And no worries! I rarely get other anons on this blog except for when I post fic prompts. The Turn fandom has become very quiet this year.)

You're very welcome! My memory of a lot of the details from the show is getting rusty, but I'm glad what I do remember has been helpful. :D

I don't remember if I've said this before, but I have a couple meta tags on here that you could look through, too. Others' meta that I've reblogged is tagged "meta" and my own are tagged "my meta" (although, given Tumblr's famously broken tag search, both probably show up under each other's tags, if they show up at all lol).

I'm glad the AO3 metas were helpful! I think I might have used the Wayback Machine to get to some of the broken links on the AMC site. I'm not sure how I found the original links in the first place, though, other than trawling through old Turn blogs on here. If any AMC links show up under the metas I've reblogged, you could give them a try in the Wayback Machine and see if the pages were saved earlier by someone else. It's such a bummer the pages have been taken down on AMC's site; all of the actors had such great insight into their characters.

And no worries! That's why I list content warnings. :) Thanks for your kind words! Take care, friend! ❤︎

[lordgeales]

One entire year at Tumblr :D

DEAL WITH IT

An entire year at Tumblr running a rp blog for a vampire that we now know.. A tiny bit about. Instead of just a whole lot of nothing. When I think about it, I don’t think that much has changed, but looking back... It has. Back when I started up, I honestly had no idea how the customs of tumblr RPs worked. I didn’t know about rules, formatting posts, icons... Honestly NOTHING at all. I’m still amazed that no one yelled at me. 

I think I caught on pretty quickly tho, four months later, I made this blog. Changing from a sideblog, to a main. And boy, that changed a lot. With that came the new icons(why did I decide to go all out with them... Whhyyy), promos, rules, a design(that is very old holy-), and everything a RP’er should have. At least according to tumblr. 

Although I have to say that I still felt a bit alone being on tumblr. I never really got to speak to people OOC, and the ones I reached out to.. Oboi (((: Let’s forget about that. It gradually became better. In May I met what I’d call my first “tumblr friend”. Who unfortunately isn’t very active RP-wise anymore.

December was wild compared to the rest of my time. Starting with a meme that led to me getting to talk with Lily(@elyon-kurae​), not to mention the dear Vero(@monophagia​) joining in on the RP :D! That has led to yet another chain event, and I’m very much involved in the RP community now. I think I finally understand what it’s all about.

And although I’ve been through a lot, weeks of inactivity, spikes of activity and shitposting, tons of asks, lack of asks.. Hm, well, we’re still here. I still have the pleasure of talking to most of the people I did back in the days, and a lot of new to call friends.

The people I’ve been interacting with through the time under the cut. Read at own risk it’s very... Long.

People listed in the correct order they appeared at my blog c;

@lestkarrkingofeurope: Starting out with a strange RP on a drawing I won(reblogged just before this post~). I have no idea what we were doing, but it was a lot of fun! Also the reason I even stumbled into this community to begin with. Lately I’ve had the pleasure of being... blessed a lot. Save me from my sins, oh holy tsunami.

@forgottenprogenitor: I think you came along with Lest, with your former muse, Akane. I adored that RP, giving me a chance to show some of Urds more gentle sides. Akihiko was the absolute breakthrough though, I adore him. I love our interactions, and look forwards to yet another year!

@tatsu-rose-bathory: YOU CAME WITH A FLOWECROWN! I remember that much :D! It took a few weeks before we eventually interacted, but I was pretty much in love with Tatsu from the start(still very much am). I really enjoy reading about her, not to mention their occasional small talk they do nowadays. It’s so nice having someone around that Urd actually looks at with gentle eyes ;-;

@makotonarumi/@dusksovereign​: Unfortunately no longer active, but just for the sake of people reading it - Holy fUCK?! When you first reached out to me I was soooo confused. Still am. You are/were an amazing writer, and honestly I felt so bad whenever I wrote replies, because.. Ah, I didn’t feel worthy at all. You were extremely nice to me, however, sending me all kinds of anon-love, tagging me in memes... Ahh. Thank you so much. I don’t think you know how much it meant to me. Just. Thank you. And I’m sorry for being such a slob with the replies.

@ferid-trash-bathory/@shusaku: Turns out you’ve been around forever. Through it all. Wow. Sometimes I do wonder just how bad of an impression i left back then *lol*. Ah, I remember us talking every now and then, it’s just lately I’ve come to know you for “real”. I really like your portrayal of “Fred”, not to mention Shusaku.... Who I might have been a bit mean to back then.... *coughs* Aha, but I’ve been sure that you were nice for a very long time. Still very happy that I reached out to you about the Egypt AU. Although Vero was dying in the background. Best meme lord. Also someone I can always trust to help Urd get revenge on Saito. Gotta get back at that ass amirite.

@mrsaitou: “My first real Tumblr friend” ahh. I really miss having you around. We talked a lot about... I don’t even know. But we talked a lot. I can’t even remember if it started in May, where the first meme with you were tagged, or if we started talking later on. I think I have your personal somewhere... Might dig that out sometimes soon to hear what you’re up to.

krultepxs: Deactivated, unfortunately... A Krul I had tons of fun with, planning all kind of strange stuff. Urd keeping Krul a prisoner after her treason in the Kremlin. An AU where they had to marry. Unfortunately we never got to RP, or plan that much due to me going hiatus for a few weeks. 

@lvstforblood​: OKAY WE BONDED OVER A MEME... And then never talked again. Rip. But if you ever feel like rp’ing, you know where to find me. Winks at.

@asurayuucentral​/@perfectasura​: I can’t even remember when you started coming around tbh, but we haven’t interacted that much. Still I feel like you’re kinda my friend, and I love to see your little likes and crack reblogs ;-;! Also I’d love to rp with you some more whenever!

@erisblonde​: Wonder if you’re still around and into the fandom? We’ve theorized a lot about Urd ahh... Unfortunately it kinda died out - probably due to me going inactive. I tend to do that a lot, huh... Just know, that if you feel like talking theories, hit me up. Anytime. Anyday.

@riddlemehiss/@dil-a-to-ry: WOOP! MY FAVORITE CAT! Okay I was kinda skeptic when The Cheshire cat waltzed into my askbox. But surprisingly I really enjoy his interactions with Urd. You play him amazingly, like holy shit. I’ve enjoyed every single second. Also you’re a really nice person, I think I still see you around every now and then, although Cheshire is on Hiatus. But if you ever feel like reviving him... You can count on Urd to be confused by his lack of respect for gravity :P!

@masterofzawarudo: Can I just say that I love everything about Dio. Although Urd doesn’t. In fact he’s probably annoyed by every single fiber of his being. Sorry for not reaching out to you more often, you’re seriously awesome. Although I find it kinda hard to connect on the strength-level, since our muses come from such different verses. BUT AS LONG AS THEY DON’T FIGHT I’M UP FOR ANYTHING. COME FIGHT ME! YA! wait, don’t do that. Fuck. Also I don’t follow you because I don’t watch Jojo, and you post so much stuff about that rip, still love your blog tho

@kruliisms: Hmmm... Here’s where I’m in doubt. I never wrote it down anywhere, but are you perhaps Krultepxs? Ah, I don’t know. What I know for sure, is that we never really got back to RP’ing, and that you’ve gone inactive yet again. But just to let you know, if you ever feel like doing something with Urd - you’re more than welcome to hit me up :)!

@krullish: Hmm... I think we planned something a while back, but never got around to do it? But anyway, if you feel like RPing with the... shitty russian vampire lord, well... Here I am. Still around c;!

@repulsc: EEEYYYYYYY CASCADA AND LATE NIGHT SHIT POSTING! That my jam. Also chain kinks. I did not say that. I don’t think we’ve ever done anything aside from shitposting and endless icon threads of stare-battles. Always up for more. Or smth serious, whatever you feel like. Winks very hard at.

@brassboundvalkyrie: I think I first noticed you for real when you commented on a picture of me(the mun), however I never really got around to talk to you. Unfortunately our muses are not very compatible orz! BUT HEY! Suddenly you were there, yelling to me about Vero, and whelp... I accidentally joined. Whops. You’re a real nice person, and I looove your Horn. Hope she’ll find a Crowley soon. Until then, I’ll suffer in silence with you. Looking forwards to meeting you c;! Just... No straw, and no masks, k?

@wintersoldier-barnes: Wiggles eyebrows Please send me more Urd. Send me all the Urd. I love the Urd. Gimme the Urd. Urd drug buddy. Also yet another sinner of the SaiUrd squad. Feel free to send me (n)Urds at any times, or just anything in general. You’re amazing to talk to, so~! Also you’re a really pretty Urd holy shit

@rk-silverknight: You just fit in here for some strange reason, because Noblesse yass! We’ve never interacted ic, but you’re still a really nice person! I hope we’ll get to talk some more sometimes in the future. Or perhaps break the bundaries between our muses worlds... Who knows. Perhaps they could actually get along.... Or just have a silent starring contest. 

@elyon-kurae: I can’t even... How did we go from relationship meme to... Talking about high and low? You are an adorable person, and.. So sorry for ruining your innocence orz! BUT EYY SAIURD BUDDY~! Also corner buddy, Tumblr sis, and everything really. I like you tons <3

@rigr-stafford: It’s really nice to have you around! I know we haven’t talked much ooc, but just stretching a leggi out and saying EY I LIKE YOU TOO! Looking forwards to our future interactions!

@borntobeafangirlxd: I think it’s really cute how you manage to like my posts all the time. Aaahhh, you probably have no idea how much it means to me! I’m so happy you like my portrayal, 

@monophagia: How the fuck did the tag “Another traitor has joined the game~” END UP IN A THREAD WITH MIKU, A TV BEING IMPALED BY A SPOON, AND MAKEOUT ON THE BLOODY FLOOR?! KJLaslfhalskfd. I cannot. Even. Just... Lol. Also you liking that Saito-rp-partner ask, and actually making a blog for him is probably the best thing that happened in my whole Tumblr history. You almost deserve a whole post by itself, so I’ll just stop before it gets too long lol. I love u bby, and I fucking adore your Saito. Be it angsty human Saito who gets way too dramatic whenever Urd ignores him, the priest who adores his pharaoh way too much, or the canon-vampire with his weird pudding obsession. You’re a joy to write with, and honestly I’m amazed we’re still keeping it up. I’M SO HAPPY YOU REACHED OUT TO ME?! OK SEE U IN LIKE... SOON. Don’t kidnap me for too long when I come to Germany tho. I cannot German. 

@playfulprogenitor: For some reason I can’t tag you? BUT just want to let you know, that you’re free to swing by anytime! It was really fun seeing you join in on the shitposting! 

@lacus-owns-you: We actually interacted through your OC @louischerel long before I even knew that it was you on that Lacus account. HELLO MOMMY! You’re a joy to talk to, and although we rarely RP, I still enjoy haning out with you ooc <3!

@hiiragi-yukine: Aaah you seem so nice! Although we haven’t really spoken outside the RPs, I really enjoy your OC. Also Yukine as faceclaim doesn’t make it any worse noragamiftwamirite.

@ALL THE PEOPLE I PROBABLY FORGOT

Thank you so much for following me! And I’m so sorry if I forgot you, I had to go through a lot of posts, so I probably did orz.

@ALL MY ANONS

I LOVE YOU TONS THANKS FOR ALL THE ASKS THANKS FOR THE SUPPORT

AND THANK YOU FOR LOVING URDS BUTT I know it’s amazing

He secretly loves you too

[ancientcalamity]

『                     193 out of 200 followers...                          Pfft, close enough! Hello, everyone!     Thank you all for following me. I'm grateful and... it's been many     years since I last made a Follow Forever or anything like this;     been years since I've trusted people enough to really bother,      so it was hard for me to do. There's going to be that bias list below,     the different people I know/have come to know/am in the process     of getting to know and that have changed me for the better I guess     you could say? So, to all of you, even if you aren't on the list, 

                                    thank you.

I’d like to put a warning here that it gets pretty personal below the cut, so for a tl;dr of the names, they are as follows: 

@guidcnce

@blessedbisha

@divineveena

@hafuriyuki

@calamitouscyan

and last but not least, @shinxki. 

Not only are they extremely skilled as writers, they’re extremely wonderful people altogether. 

Now...

                      If ya continue to read, it’s yer choice now.                                            It’s long.     』

As a child to early teen, I'd gone through multiple different types of abuse ranging from sexual to mental and while I'm not a coo-coo person going out to murder random people (lol) or anything like that, I do have mental illnesses and I've had physical disorder(s?) that I'm still going through/getting past thanks to my history. 

           Each day, I feel horrible waking, honestly.

Don't feel worth it. I'm obnoxious. I'm pushy. I'm clingy. I'm a creep. Still getting to know myself as a person. Still getting to understand emotions again. Still getting to being normal in some way. Still trying to get to the point of not blaming myself for any and everything bad that happens to me or my loved ones.

Those sorta things and of course the other usual stuff besides depression.

Anxiety.

Mild schizophrenia.

Extremely mild dissociative disorder.

aaaaand lastly paranoia.

I don’t think I’m too ‘out there’ with my mental issues and I think I’m sane enough to handle myself out in the world so yeah. My eating disorder isn’t here any longer but I do forget to eat by accident (woops!) so my anemia decides to go 

and so, I, in return, go

“-dies-”

I came to the Noragami roleplaying fandom on October 22nd, 2016, but I wasn’t really... out there and not known to much of anyone. I didn’t post for long periods of time, too, and I just sorta accepted it cuz ya know? I was new. I met a few blogs here and there but low and behold that didn’t work out but I’m pretty used to having shit go down the drain for me. It wasn’t odd or anything for me and for a bit I’d though about deleting, remaking, and going to another fandom. 

Fast-forward to late November-beginning December and I get a follow back by @guidcnce. “Whoa! Cool! A Kazuma! Holy shit a Noragami blog is following me!” I said, getting overly excited as I ate my Oreos that day-- “Lemme check out their blog!” 

Lil’ ol’ me goes to see the blog, I’m happy, excited-- and my eyes fall on @calamitouscyan, @divineveena, and @hafuriyuki.

“....Shit.”

“Okay, so 1.) There’s another Yato and holy fuck, his blog is great, 2.) There’s a BISHAMON ( @divineveena ) but she talks to @calamitouscyan too (fuck me sideways) and 3.) A YUKINE! ( @hafuriyuki ) YAAAA- fuck he tALKS TO @calamitouscyan too?!?!? HOW FUCKING FAMOUS IS THIS DUDE?? Shit, they must’ve been here for such a long time, shit shit shit shit shit--” 

Insert panicking and anxiety filled Cel here! -pops party streamers- WOOOOOOO! Yer not good enough!! Fuck yeah! You got people that’ve not only been here WAY longer than you but your blog LOOKS LIKE TRASH AND SO DO YOUR ICONS! NICE!

Yooooooooooou suuuuuuuck!

I suck it up, keep my emotions to myself and wing it with @guidcnce; I got new followers, I meet with OCs and canon rpers, I talk and plot with people, things goin’ great! Kazuma’s bitch ass is being one of the nicest people I’ve met and holy fuck if it wasn’t for them being so nice/lenient with me I wouldn’t-- WAIT. THAT’S NOT IT!

DID YOU KNOW MY YATO IS NOT A /NORMAL/ YATO??? NO?

...

why the fuck are you reading this then?

Go read my About and Rules, you fucker I swear to GOD I WILL FUCKING END YOUR LI- 

....

..........

...moving on.

Kazuma had the NERVE to not ONLY reply to my starter with them in canon (well written canon might I add if you don’t follow them you might wanna do so cuz ya know they’re great and stuff and mhm good shit-- A-ANYWAYS-), but also responded to my character AS IF THEY WERE IN THE SAME VERSE AND WORLD AND SPEAKIN’ NORMALLY-- I just...

I WAS EMOTIONAL OKAY???? I STILL AM. 

I STILL AM DAMN YOU. 

...They didn’t just treat me right when we met and talked in private but they did so in rp and... I think because of them I started to open up more. Finally, I got in gear with my blog and icons and every thing in general for Tumblr. I made a brand new follow post and I was excited and--

....why are @divineveena, @calamitouscyan, and @hafuriyuki following me??? ........no. 

no.

no.

NO.

NONONONONONONONONONO-- 

I’M NOT READY FOR THIS WHAT IF THEY THINK I’M SHIT WHAT IF THEY MOCK ME WHAT IF THEY TALK ABOUT ME THEY SEEM LIKE FRIENDS I’M NEW WHAT IF-

aaaaand here goes panicking Cel x2.

These people are following me, reblogging from me, SENDING ME ASKS--

I get invited to a group of other people and... I’m afraid. Skeptical and looking back at it, I still am sometimes but... that’s something for another day. 

@calamitouscyan, @divineveena, and @shinxki are the main others there and it feels like going to a party in the Office and you know how everything is awkward? Yeah that. 

There are a few others that I’m sad to say are no longer there but... I don’t hate anyone. Was raised differently than that. 

A month goes by and I feel better to talk to others, a few events have happened, and it looks like I have a brand new roleplay partner! Not only did @calamitouscyan and @shinxki include me in something I never thought I’d do- having an OC shinki, a LIVING-- ...dead? ... breathing? ... 

fuck it, whatever-- AN OC SHINKI THAT WE LITERALLY FIGHT TOGETHER, but they were supportive during the whole time. @hafuriyuki joined us soon and both of the shinki got along and just...

Everyone was together. An actual family and a group. @calamitouscyan turned out to be another ‘self’ (DICEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE) ((don’t ask, they’ll get it)) in not just rp but /outside/ it too because of our cultural similarities and it moved to the point I showed a game I was playing and they joined. THEY JOINED AND WE DANCE TOGETHER IN GAME!

I’M NOT KIDDING, LOOK!

I have a friend to play with! 

Outside of the game, @divineveena ruins my FUCKING life because we managed to make a relationship for Older!Yato and Bishamon, you wouldn’t be able to tell that they tried to kill each other at one point. 

A BrOTP to such a point-- ugh it’s been years.

YEARS.

Trusting people has not been something I do and after YEARS of agony she managed to be my literal best friend and it makes me want to cry.

FUCK WE CAME UP WITH STUPID AS FUCK ‘CRINGE’ MEME ICONS. SHE HAS ONE OF BISHAMON. HERE’S YATO.

It’s AMAZING.

The amount of memes we make it fuckin’ stupid. I love it.

and now there’s another Bishamon- not giving me two of the same type of person but a Bishamon who’s tragic and heartbroken and has problems @divineveena but another who’s ALSO tragic but also healing and softer. @blessedbisha

She has tried her fucking hardest to bring up spirits and cheer up others and just do what she can for each of us- she’s like a mom. I’m Satan of the fandom so someone has to even out my evil deeds- 

SERIOUSLY, though, when things are down and horrible, they keep moving. 

It’s encouraging. 

Both of them. 

They both try so hard for everyone, even in the worst times. 

Even though I know @divineveena more, I highly doubt @blessedbisha is less caring and both of them fuck up my life as Bishamons because...

ya know.

Bishamon likes beating me up and                       ruining my day SO YEAH.

....then there’s @shinxki.

I believe I met her around two or three months ago, after meeting the other Yato and Bishamon. 

.......

...............

-deep breath-

When I ‘like’ a friend or someone it’s not /that/ type of crush. Not lovey dovey so don’t go cringing away from this post just yet. 

                It’s like...  earlier I said I get clingy; I’ve been abandoned before, multiple times, whether it be for my sexual orientation, my race, my gender issues, my mental issues, my bluntness, or whatever the fuck else people have blown up on me and told me before they left, I’ve been dropped and left. Even recently, when I first started this blog, someone did it within a week because I left to give them space after we had a disagreement. It’s still affecting me, even now. I don’t...

I don’t do well with people hiding things or forgetting me or leaving me behind. I have the phobia about being forgotten or abandoned. It’s full blown and it isn’t pretty. I hate it, but when there’s someone who puts effort into me or something I like and at the same time they talk to me about their issues and don’t hide those things from me and trust me and want to actually bother with me and put up with me and it’s just

-rambling- 

IT’S LIKE

“THIS IS MY FRIEND. THIS IS /THAT/ FRIEND. THIS IS THE MAJOR FRIEND. LOOK AT THEM. LOOK. DO YOU SEE THEM? THIS IS THE BAE OKAY LOOK.”

I guess what I’m saying is she’s close. She means a lot and I’m grateful that she

-puts up with me -likes me as a friend -is my shinki -is my ship-friend -is honest with me -is blunt -goes off on me -snaps at me -gets mad at me -doesn’t put me on a pedestal -doesn’t hide things from me

the list goes on but I guess you get the point.

......When I was either 11 or 12 or somewhere near that age, I made a promise to myself, not a nice one and the date of that promise is coming but/and for the first time in a long while, and I mean years again, I don’t know what to think about it and I’m not sure if things will end up going to that point. 

To be fair, the only thing I really want now is a job and to go to school. I have a great mom and I actually have friends so... that’s all I want and... 

...I think I’d be okay if I had that. 

Maybe a therapist and/or a counselor again, too (lmao)...

but... I have these guys to thank for helping me get as far as I have. My life only seems like it’s a downward spiral but they all make me so happy and I owe a lot to them. I’m brash, harsh, blunt, depressed, anxious, and all around a not very pleasant person to be around and all of them try for me and each other. ...They all put themselves down or they’re unhappy in some way and it hurts, because they mean so much more than that and I don’t know what else to do for them. 

I’m a person behind a computer screen so...  -shrugs- 

A ‘thank you’ isn’t really enough. Not a simple one, anyways. 

You each mean a lot to not only me but others and I want you and other people to know that. I’m not dead yet, so ya have to be doin’ something correct, right? 

...

I’mma stop rambling and leave this here for you all, alright?

                              𝑚𝑎𝑦 𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑓𝑎𝑡𝑒𝑠 𝑖𝑛𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑡𝑤𝑖𝑛𝑒.

                                                                  - 𝖈𝖊𝖑.

[orneryotter-greiverdhark]

Oops

So I realised the other day that I should really actually....post on here more? Rather than just reblogging stuff, I keep forgetting to actually...have a presence >_>” Woops. So I will try and actually use tumblr for more than reblogging, for those few of you who come hunting on here for like, fanfic updates and shit lol.

So yeh, here’s an update! I’m still working on the next chapter of my HP VRMMO fic, the Department of Magical Integration. Its well underway but I’ve gotten distracted (so sorry!).

What I’m distracted by: So, when I was still working, before I had to quit because of my chronic headaches, I started trying to create an rpgmaker horror game. I’ve taken that up again. Its slow going at the moment because I’m still working on the story and some of the details before implementation properly starts, but yeh, that’s what I’m working on mostly right now.

I’ve also been clearing through some old ideas on things, and I’ve got a story idea I started, so I’ll either post it up as a stand alone, or embed it into a full-fledged fic, depending on if/when I can do that. So yeh, I am also coming up with non-DoMI writings to work on.

In other news, my sib has finally gotten their streaming channel up, for those of you who like to watch streaming on twitch. Lee is on Tuesdays and Thursdays, 1pm-9pm GMT. Also maybe some weekends and stuff, but that’s the main schedule. They were playing Killing Floor last time, though that won’t be all they play. Link is below, for those interested!

For those of you who found me through other means, as you may have guessed I write fanfiction, and can be found on FF.net and AO3 under the name Ornery Otter (links below). I post on both, but favor AO3 just cos its so much easier for me to upload, so it gets uploaded first usually.

http://archiveofourown.org/users/Greiver_Dhark/works

https://www.twitch.tv/limitlxss