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#kaiper
miskiart · 1 year
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obtained rare item: 🌟 Wish Bottle
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sgt-kpr · 1 month
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I know that your user has your initials but I just read it as "kaiper" tbh
Maybe I'm "Kaiper", who knows.
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aiscard · 7 days
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Weeeeeeee
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nevidika · 9 months
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Veruca, looking at me while I'm having a new OTP with Kai:
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barovianbitches · 10 months
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Would You Like Me A Little Bit Better? - Bettany Blackstarr
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“I don't… I don’t have the money for that.” The young man admitted, shuffling in his worn-in leather boots. The Orkish barkeep glared down at him with a fierce gaze, his nose wrinkling in distaste. “Mummy didn’t give you your lunch money, eh, kid?” He snorted, large tusks extruding from his bottom lip as he laughed a deep rumbling noise. His eyes glinted with malice. “Please, I just need it for one night, that’s it,” Bettany begged, his legs wobbling from his long travels. The last town he’d stayed in had been over 16 hours away, and he’d walked straight from there.
“Tough luck, lad,” The barkeep chuckled, “you’ve mistaken my place of business for a fuckin’ charity. What’s a young thing like you doin’ out at this time of evenin’ anyway? Didn’t you see the signs, or can you not read, either?” He jabbed a green thumb toward a wooden plaque that read: 18 and unders will be kicked out NO EXCEPTIONS!
I’m not a kid! He wanted to scream.
His slender frame and bad posture led many to think he was a young teen, thus many treated him as such. As if he wouldn’t be able to handle more “adult” subjects of conversation.
 “I’m twenty,” Bettany muttered, voice barely above a whisper as he frowned at the sign. “Right, and Imma pixie,” The orkish set down the glass he’d been polishing with a dull thud, he gripped his hands on the counter as he bent to Bettany’s height. “You can’t pay? Then get out of my FUCKING bar!” He roared, spittle splattering across Bettany’s face. “And for god's sake, cover that disgusting face of yours. You’re going to scare off my PAYING customers.” Bettany winced, his lip trembling furiously as a lump raised in his throat. “Please,” Bettany whispered once more, his nervous eyes looking to the spot on the counter between the Ork’s giant hands. “Are you STUPID or somethin’? OUT!!!” The barkeep bellowed, jabbing a furious finger past Bettany’s face and towards the door. Bettany scrambled backward, stumbling towards the door. Bettany hung his head low as the other patrons of the bar watched him leave, their curious whispers following him as he retreated.
The door slammed behind him, and the minute he left a joyous roar of laughter erupted from the grimy windows, as the guests of the establishment quickly jumped back into their festivities. Rain pounded the dirt streets, mud pockets burbling up from the earth as the storm thundered above. Bettany exhaled sharply, trying to stop tears from running down his face
He slouched away from the tavern door, trying to keep to the shadows as opposed to walking in the lantern-lit streets. He just had to find something to sleep under, some shelter from this rain that had already soaked him to the bone.
Bettany managed to find a somewhat covered alleyway between two of the larger structures. There were even bins of trash for him to look through for something to eat. He began to forage through the trash, desperate for anything to quelch the hunger that hollowed his stomach. The hair on the back of his neck prickled, and Bettany realized he wasn’t alone. He slowly glanced over his shoulder, spotting a large half-wolf that smoked behind an alleyway. 
“Hey!” The man called to Bettany who turned back to his foraging, twitching with irritation. He was tired and didn’t have time for this. “You lost, kitty?” The guy snorted, flicking the cigarette out of his teeth as he stomped on the bud. He was far older and larger than Bettany. “I’m fine,” Bettany said, not turning towards the man, keeping his body submerged in the shadows. The man grinned a pointed smile at him, lumbering towards Bettany.
“Pretty thing, aren’t you?” He purred, “half of you, at least.” Bettany tensed as he felt a clawed hand touch the small of his back, cold fear racing down his spine. He froze as the man reached a hand up under his chin, roughly turning Bettany’s head to meet his eyes. “The name’s Gonk,” He muttered, looking exclusively at Bettany’s mouth, inhaling deeply through wolf-like nostrils “And you, kitten, are the best meal I’ve yet to have.” Bettany squirmed, but Gonk’s grip was as strong as steel.
“Let go of me,” Bettany hissed, his eyes ablaze with anger, his eyes watering as the stench of Gonk’s matted fur filled his nostrils. A scent like wet dog and hot oil. “Come on, play nice, kitten.” Gonk tutted, “You’ll do perfectly.”
Bettany tried to summon a spell, anything… But he was too tired, and the blue energy faded from his eyes as his throat was clutched by the wolfman.
“No,” Bettany groaned, his head feeling dizzy as Gonk’s claws gripped into his neck, the man grinning as he deeply inhaled at the base of Bettany’s neck. “Like vanilla and clove,” Gonk slobbered, smelling Bettany’s skin deeply. Bettany knew he smelled far from vanilla OR clove, but he was too paralyzed with fear to mention that at the moment. “HEY! Shithead!” a voice rang out, causing Gonk to loosen his grip on Bettany. Dark red tiefling wearing dark leather armor nodded in his direction. He was much taller than Bettany, with dark black hair slicked back into a short mullet. His pointed tail twitched as his green eyes narrowed at the sight of the wolfman. 
“Ah, little hero is back from his adventure?” Gonk snarled, bearing his teeth at “fuck off Kaiper, leave me and my date be.”
“Not to stick my nose in yeh business, but I’m pretty sure a date implies both parties are consenting, yeh?” The tiefling, Kaiper, looked to Bettany, “You okay there, lovey?”
Bettany shook his head rapidly. Kaiper nodded, unbuckling a long sword from its hilt. “That’s what I thought,” Kaiper said, tossing the blade in the air and catching the grip. He waved the blade at Gonk. 
It was an ornate hilt of black iron and silver rings that twisted in a snake-like pattern, the cross guard splayed into spikes, like the spine of a dragon. The pommel was encrusted with a shimmering emerald carved to a faceted sphere. The blade was leaf-shaped, tapering off into a fine point.
“You see that, bruv?” Kaiper sneered, “Silver that is. Now, correct me if I’m wrong, but silver tends to fuck up blokes like you, yeh?”
Gonk growled as the point was brought to his throat. Kaiper’s eyes narrowed at him, and he jutted his chin out. “Come on now, fuck off,” Kaiper instructed.
Gonk roughly released Bettany, shoving the small man into the wall harshly as he lumbered out of the alleyway, murmuring profanities under his breath. “Thank you,” Bettany coughed, Kaiper offered a gloved hand to help him back to his feet. “Come on, lovey, let’s get you somewhere safe, yeh?” Kaiper said as Bettany gratefully accepted his offer, struggling to his feet.
Kaiper, despite being so brutal to Gonk, held Bettany very gently, leading him down the street and into a small flat. He led Bettany into the backroom, the bedroom, and walked him over to a mattress in the corner. Kaiper hefted Bettany into the small bed, a cloud of dust poofing upwards as Bettany’s weight fell on it. 
“Sorry ‘bout the mess, I only just rolled back into town.” Kaiper explained, “My crew and I were off fighting a mind flayer off the sword coast. Nasty business.” Kaiper noticed Bettany wasn’t exactly in the talkative mood, so he pursed his lips. He put his hands on his hips and bounced on his heels slightly. “You can sleep here for the night, don’t worry about old Gonk, he’s a clown, but he won't bother you anymore. Kaiper said, shrugging off his gear, and walking to a wardrobe where he collected a large knit blanket made up of colorful tetric designs.
Kaiper handed it to Bettany, looking down at the small druid as he snuggled under the blanket. Bettany was seemingly unbothered by his sodden clothes, but Kaiper didn’t want the man to get sick. “If you give me your clothes, I can wash them for you,” Kaiper sighed, his pointy ears flattening for a second as his tail twitched, “You can keep on your unders of course, and I won't watch you undress, so don’tchu worry over that.”
Bettany blushed almost as red as Kaiper, he nodded silently as he began to unbutton his blouse, Kaiper kept to his word and turned his back, his tail swishing as he stared at the wall in front of him. Bettany folded his discarded clothes into a neat pile as he set them at the foot of the bed, pulling up the blanket to cover any of his bear skin that might show. “Okay…” croaked Bettany, golden eyes peeking over the edge of the blanket as Kaiper turned around. Kaiper swiftly collected the clothes, moving to the closed door with grace. He put a clawed hand on the handle, opening it with a creak before he turned around to face Bettany again. “I won’t bother you again tonight, I’ll bring these back in the morning, yeh?” Kaiper spoke firmly, but with compassion.
“Okay,” Bettany responded. “I’ll see you in the morning, lovey,” Kaiper said before quietly closing the door behind him.
Bettany tried to keep his mind alert, sure Kaiper seemed like a nice guy, but trusting people got you nowhere… He struggled to keep his eyes open, noting every last detail of his surroundings, down to the web-like cracks in the plaster and the faint drip from the ceiling in the far right corner of the room. But eventually, his exhaustion won out, and the pounding of the rain on the windows lulled Bettany into a deep sleep. 
Bettany stirred, jumping at the sight of a horned figure standing at the foot of his bed. Kaiper froze, Bettany’s freshly laundered clothes in his hands.
“Sorry, lovey, I didn’t mean to wake you. I was just returning your goods,” Kaiper explained, nodding to the neatly folded fabric he held.
“Thank you… Kaiper,” Bettany hummed, his body perfectly comfortable in the lumpy bed, feeling warm and safe for the first time in ages as the morning sun trickled through the windows. “Don’t worry about it, I didn’t catch your name by the way,” Kaiper let out a twinkling laugh, shaking his head, “I swear, I usually would buy a guy like you a meal and ask his name before I bring him back to my home.”
Bettany felt his heart skip as he laughed nervously. “That’s okay, hah, I uh… Blackstarr. Bettany Blackstarr.” He introduced himself, color flooding to his cheeks as he blinked at Kaiper. “Nice to meet you, Bettany Blackstarr, I’m Kaiper Whitlem.” The fighter extended a hand for Bettany to shake, Bettany took it cautiously. A wave of electricity ran down his arm from where he touched Kaiper, like a buzz. It took everything he had not to jerk his arm away immediately. 
“Pleasure,” Bettany muttered. Kaiper grinned as he removed his hand, studying Bettany with curious green eyes, a gaze that made Bettany’s stomach churn. Kaiper grinned at him, nodding his head over his shoulder towards the door in the corner. “Come on, lovey, let’s have some breakfast.” Kaiper slunk from the room, his red tail flicking around the corner. Bettany followed him out into the rest of the flat. It was a bit dusty, but covered in maps of the sea, banners of different ships hung victoriously from the shelves which were filled with oddities collected from years of travel. Bettany felt particularly interested by a statue of a golden bat with a blue icosahedron gem that was clasped in its delicate wings.
“you want coffee?” Kaiper asked from where he was clanking around in the kitchen. Bettany was too distracted to answer.
“that one tickling your fancy, yeh?” Kaiper asked, having silently appeared behind Bettany, who jumped.
“Oh uh, yeah I like the… detail,” Bettany explained, feeling intimidated by the taller man.
“Took that lad from a band of thieves. Been meaning to return it to it’s village, but it’ll stay here for now.” Kaiper had a distant look in his eye as he observed the small figurine.
 “Coffee?” He asked again, turning back to Bettany.
“Oh- no, I’m fine,” Bettany smiled, looking up at Kaiper who nodded.
“I get it, when I drink it it’s mostly rum anyways,” the young tiefling smiled a wry smile, leading Bettany to the kitchen, “come.”
Kaiper say Bettany in a rickety wooden chair, setting a bowl of porridge the color of fog in front of him. He patted Bettany’s shoulder, his touch lingering for a second longer than needed before he sat across from Bettany at the table.
“You ever think about adventuring?” The pirate asked, crossing his arms. Bettany shook his head wildly, “No! It’s definitely not for me, I uh… I much prefer staying safe.” He admitted sheepishly, smiling shyly. Bettany poked around at his porridge, but didn’t eat. “Not much safe about wandering a strange town at night, Bettany,” Kaiper countered, “there’s an adventurer in you. You just haven’t unlocked it yet.”
Bettany felt doubtful, but he merely shrugged in response. “Maybe…” He concluded.
“Yous a spellcaster, right? I saw your eyes glowing in the alley,” Kaiper asked, “Warlock or something, yeh?”
Bettany shook his head, “no, not a warlock, I’m a Druid.”
He conjured some magic to his hand, summoning a small dandelion that he set on the table in front of Kaiper, his cheeks blushing.
Kaiper smiled excitedly as he snatched up the flower, “a man of nature, impressive. I never had the talent for magic, it’s why I stick to these.” Kaiper referred to the many weapons already strapped to his person this early in the morning.
“I tell yuh though, you don’t need spells to charm.” Kaiper grinned, his voice coming out as a purr. Bettany flushed again. It wasn’t like what Gonk had done last night, Kaiper was kind, and his cadence was nothing but respectful.
“you gotta lady wherever you’re from,” Kaiper asked, a rouge fang extruding from his lips, “or maybe a fella?”
The tiefling raised his eyebrows, his emerald eyes twinkling.
Bettany coughed, shaking his head, “no… neither I uh… no.”
“That’s a downright shame. I’d say you were quite the catch…” Kaiper hummed. Bettany felt himself sweat. He needed to leave before he did anything irrational. Even though his every instinct was screaming to leave, he couldn’t help but look at Kaiper’s lips, surprisingly soft for a pirate.
“You staying ‘round in town much longer?” Kaiper asked, reclining in his chair as he twirled a dagger between his fingers.
“I’ve got to get going…” Bettany explained, “It’s best if I don’t stick around in one place for too long. Besides, you’ve got to get back to your crew… thank you though, this was really lovely.” Bettany stood, his chair screeching against the wooden floors. He began towards the door.
“Wait!” Kaiper called. Bettany paused, turning back towards his new friend. Kaiper reached a heavily ringed hand up to Bettany’s cheek.
“this okay, yeh?” Kaiper muttered, his eyes flicking to Bettany’s for clarification. Bettany nodded eagerly, his mind racing.
“yes,” Bettany replied.
With a smile, Kaiper brushed a loose strand of hair away as he leaned in and gently kissed Bettany. Bettany’s heart thudded like it was being shaken in a jar, closing his eyes as he leaned into the kiss. Kaiper playfully bit his bottom lip before pulling away, grinning as if he’d just snagged a satchel of gold. Bettany kept his eyes closed for a second, still shaken by the suddenness of it all.
“For luck,” Kaiper grinned, “Lemme know if you ever change your mind about the whole adventuring gig. We could always use a druid like yourself on the high seas.” “Th-Thank you, but I-,” Bettany blushed madly, shaking his head to re-orient himself from the sudden kiss, “I don’t know if I’d fare well on a boat. I tend to get nauseous standing on land.” Kaiper let out a bark of  laughter, jovially bumping Bettany’s shoulder, “Still, you’ve got a place on my crew, okay, mate?” Bettany nodded, “I’ll keep you updated.” Kaiper grinned, “You ever need something? Check out a tavern, most know me by name. Ask for me, just make sure you say you’re a friend, yeh? They should tell you where I am, or direct you to someone who knows.” 
Bettany nodded, “Thank you, Kaiper, really.” “No problem, Bettany. With a name like yours, it really is a shame you aren’t a pirate.” Kaiper whistled, before taking a swig of his coffee. “I’ll let you get moving, see you around, lovey.” Bettany turned, offering the tiefling a smile before he left the flat, his cloak whipping behind him as he ventured off into the unknown again.
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ix-c-999 · 5 months
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[This post has no DNI other than not to involve it in discourse, mockery, or other harassment]
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Bruce Kaiper. The Look of Imperialism - 1970
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i wish my system had caretakers in it.
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which-item-poll · 6 months
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Website is in the tags!
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vanillachaiwhiskey · 10 months
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help kaiper (one of my alters) is joking that me and my boyfriend should do feedism with food abominations like a candy corn pizza
and my boyfriend is joining in
he's saying that he should make me a drink that's a mix of gin, milk, and ketchup
(which btw is a thing he's drank before which just speaks to so much of the kind of person he is <3)
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drink-the-stars · 2 years
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Pluto and Eris and all the other dwarf planets in the Kaiper Belt but they're all in a huge long distance polycule
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whatevergreen · 2 years
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Oppression Breeds Violence - Bruce Kaiper, 1974
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beawrld · 2 months
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i was singing in the mountains earlier and the echoes were so beautiful. it reminded me of how my voice sounded in kaiper's bathroom. i wish his mom hadnt stopped letting me come over after he died, she has to be so lonely in that house. poor girl dude. why do i know so many moms who lost their only son before he turned twenty
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aiscard · 8 days
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I made a practice level :D
Doggos gotta jump
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linguistlist-blog · 7 months
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Books: Foundational Concepts of Decolonial and Southern Epistemologies: Makoni, Kaiper-Marquez, Madany-Saa, Antia (eds.) (2023)
This book brings together 11 prominent scholars and political activists to discuss and explore issues around postcolonialism, decoloniality, Theories of the South and Epistemologies of the South. These wide-ranging discussions touch upon issues from academic research methods and writing conventions to global struggles for justice. Together the chapters, as well as the interventions from forum participants which are characteristic of this series, paint a complex and dynamic picture of areas of t http://dlvr.it/T3hqWD
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miskiart · 2 years
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Rumor says the world's cutest comet sighting will appear June 22nd on The Yetee
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