#just themes of like. malicious eating. idk something about it

[dry-yellow-marker]

when the media has themes of food and/or hunger

[jayniks]

SEX NOTE SERIES

So, I decided to do this series to celebrate my 300 followers. You can ask me to add any idol + the situation, whether male or female. The final chapter will be sunoo, regardless of which idols come first.

🌊 ⏝⠀ ⚓️ ㅤ५‌ ۟ 𓂂 ꒰੭

SEX NOTE (l.hs)

After discovering the magic book, you tried to "test" it to see if it was true, you thought nothing would happen until you heard a chuckle behind you.

WC . 2.3k

PAIRING . Idol!heeseung x normal!reader

WARNINGS . ft. Jake Sim, if you saw the anime don't read this because it's not a faithful adaptation, sex (mdni), oral sex (both reciving), boobjob, boobsucking, playing with nipples, 3 rounds, sucking fingers, cum eating, dirty talk, spit play, foreplay, lmk if I missed anything else

Read here.

SEX NOTE (p.js)

after summoning heeseung, you wandered around your room looking for any ideas. Seeing your poster of your favorite band, you thought "why not invoke the guitarist?" and that's what you did, although the situation was quickly reversed when you saw how malicious he was.

WC . 2,3k

PAIRING . Rockstar!jay x fan!reader

WARNINGS . smut (mdni), oral sex (m receiving), tease, anal sex, mouth fucking, a little cuck!jake?, mentions of Jake's mom and Jake himself, magical appearance, chocking, a little filler just like in the original series, degradation, tying, unreal themes, a bit of noncon?, squirt, curses, let me know if I left something out.

Read here.

SEX NOTE (s.jy)

Your friend is jealous that, thanks to the book that HE gave you, you no longer pay attention to him, so he writes to you in that notebook in a fit of jealousy.

WC . 2k~3k

PAIRING . childhoodfriend!jake x normal!reader

WARNINGS . smut (mdni), oral sex (f receiving), lots of kisses, assjob(idk if it's called that), manhandling, spanking, let me know if I missed something

Relase date: after jay.

SEX NOTE (p.sh)

you carried that notebook everywhere, even to your doctor's office. you were in the middle of writing something when the doctor interrupted you, taking the notebook out of your hands.

WC . 2k~3k

PAIRING . doctor!sunghoon x pacient!reader

WARNINGS . smut (mdni), a little cnc if you think about it, teasing, fingering, masturbation (f receiving), creampie (the sword must have a sheath), let me know if I missed anything

Relase date: after jake.

SEX NOTE (y.jw)

you wanted to know if it would work to create a fictional character from your mind, but when it was time to think of the name your cat jumped into your lap and ruined everything.

WC . 2k~3k

PAIRING . HEAR ME OUR FIRST, I'M NOT A FURRY, READ FIRST cat-to-human!jungwon x owner!reader

WARNINGS . smut (mdni), weird situation (HEAR ME OUT), pussy eating, nip licking, sub!won, lots of whimpering from wonie, mentions of "mommy", let me know if I missed anything

Relase date: after sunghoon.

SEX NOTE (l.jn)

after the situation with your cat, you wanted to test what would happen if you did the same with your mother's old magazine.

WC . 2k~3k

PAIRING . 90sModel!jeno x normal!reader

WARNINGS . smut (mdni), unreal situation, cum on face, spit kink, eye contact, slapping, p in v, no protection but cums outside (never do that), let me know if I missed anything

Relase date: after jungwon.

SEX NOTE (k.js)

you had been on a week-long streak without using the book, a streak that was broken when you went to buy a coffee for your friend (oh, remembering Jake...) and saw the most beautiful man you had ever seen.

WC . 2k~3k

PAIRING . bartender!jongseob x costumer!reader

WARNINGS . smut (mdni), seob is a bit depressing, it's also a bit perv, facial, nipple licking (not the ones you think), sex on the table, let me know if I missed anything

Relase date: after jeno.

SEX NOTE (y.jm)

you were liking the massage too much, why not improve it?

WC . 2k~3k

PAIRING . massager!karina x costumer!reader

WARNINGS . smut (mdni), body caressing, dirty talk, rubbing, fingering, cum licking, let me know if I missed anything

Relase date: after jeongseob.

SEX NOTE (n.rk)

you were tired of your bully and his temporary girlfriend making your life miserable, so why not take revenge on both of them and get something in the process?

WC . 2k~3k

PAIRING . bully!niki x student!reader

WARNINGS . smut (mdni), niki is really mean, oral sex (m reciving), anal, fingering, some hickeys, infidelity, squirting, let me know if I missed something

Relase date: after karina.

SEX NOTE (k.sn)

you shouldn't have been greedy, you shouldn't have to carry that stupid book everywhere, now you lost it. and the worst part? it fell into the wrong hands, now you're fucked.

WC . 2k~3k

PAIRING . nerd!obsessive!classmate!sunoo x oblivious!reader

WARNINGS . smut (mdni), probably cnc, ropes to tie you, pussy eating, thigh job, creampie, cum eating, let me know if I missed anything

Relase date: after i posted all.

》 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 《

You were in your room procrastinating when your best friend, Jake Sim, came into your room throwing you a gift and then leaving as quickly as he arrived. You rolled your eyes at his action and then proceeded to open the gift. It was very badly wrapped and inside there was... a fucking notebook? You opened it to see what was inside. The cover said "sex note" but inside there were a few pages of rules and many more empty ones. The rules were:

• The human whose name is written in this note will appear to fuck you.

• This note will not take effect unless the writer has the person's face in their mind when writing his/her name. Therefore, people sharing the same name will not be affected.

• If the way they fuck is written within 40 seconds of writing it, it will happend.

• If the scenario is not written/specified, the person will only appear to fuck you in missionary.

• Minors are totally prohibited, if you write the name of someone under 18 years and 6 months, you will die of a heart attack. The same applies to animals.

OK? weird...

[bestangelofall]

Nat x Yelena for ship bingo if you’re still doing it?

Still am! Thank you for the ask! :)

This is about the comics, because in the MCU I love their familial relationship (even if I have to wonder if they wrote them as sisters to avoid having to draw stuff from the comics, where they are /like that/, though it might have been just something related to themes. Idk).

Anyway, here's the card:

Concept is more appealing than execution because I really don't like how their interactions are portrayed sometimes (because they feel too male-gazey, you know?), but I eat up the "I want to be better than you, kill you, become you" that Yelena has going on for Natasha lol. And Natasha also fucks up things (the body-swap plotline, for example) even if she truly isn't malicious regarding Yelena. Which leads to even more resentment that is actually personal rather than related to the ideal of Natasha that Yelena has come to resent. Which is nice 🙂

Anyway! I'll be thinking a lot about them now!

[itchyeye]

Of Jonah Magnus' regency era compatriots, who's your favourite? Do you have one? If so, why?

oh this is a wonderful question and yes, i do!!! it's barnabas by a miiiiiile

it has, unfortunately, much less to do with barnabas himself than the context of his letter and of elias recording it

elias reading jon a letter from his dead ex-lover is simply. unmatched. unparalleled.

but to be fair to the poor lad i'll start with the things about him specifically that i like. the first:

if i were begging on my hands and knees for my fwb to come save me from the depths of the forsaken, i would probably not put this in my letter to him

i would probably milk our relationship for all it was worth and beg to see him again

but barnabas is marked deeply by the lonely, even before mordechai banishes him to it

this makes barnabas an excellent and concise example of one of my favorite themes of magpod victims: people being devoured by the malicious embodiment of something they truly loved

barnabas found peace and solace in his solitude, idt he was really interacting with the dread power in this instance. i think he was just enjoying a moment of pleasant respite in the desert (there is nothing in the desert, and no man needs nothing)

just like robert kelly (mag 21 freefall) loved the open air before the sky swallowed him whole, just like andrea nunis (mag 48 lost in the crowd) loved traveling independently and treasured her solitude before the forsaken tried to claim her, just like julian jennings and his mom (mag 124 freefall) loved the thinner air on top of mountain peaks before the falling titan tried to eat them out of a cable car

it is so deliciously horrifying that the fears so often choose their victims from people who truly love the non-eldritch versions of them. who have a sincere attachment to the experience of their non-evil earthly equivalents. it's just so cruel!!! it's so hopeless! yes we can expect victims of the fears to be people who were, like, already arachnophobes! people who had contamination ocd, people with a fear of clowns, etc. but that you aren't even safe from being hunted by the entity that reflects your passions and joys?? that's so BLEAK!! that's so cold and calloused and unfair!!! I LOVE IT.

i also love that jonah i-can-see-it-coming-in-the-air-tonight-d barnabas after barnabs explicitly is like "if you have a shred of humanity left in you please help me"

idk i love this!! i love that this could be read as proof that jonah really doesn't have any humanity left in him. you could just as easily say that he probably didn't like barnabas all that much, and maybe just didn't want to expend the effort, and didn't mind him decaying forever in the forsaken, except

jonah did care for him. he cared enough for him that he went into the lonely to retrieve his bones. he kept those bones as a memento, not in artefact storage as a totem of the forsaken, but in his office as a keepsake

but he made his choice!! ceaseless watching. knowing too much. beholding won out over the clear affection and attachment he had for barnabas. he needed to know.

and then

so many layers here i can't think about it too hard rn or else i'll start making the sort of sound only mosquitos can hear

[pjunicornart]

Late Night... Vent? Ramble? IDK bro.

I like to think everybody has one emotion they lead with every day of their lives. I think mine is anger.

Which is basically saying you lead with a mask - since all anger is a "vulnerable" emotion in disguise. I never understood people, finding their emotions to be weird and any display of them would quickly make me withdraw from any conversation I miraculously found myself in. I guess I found anybody displaying any emotion to be "cringey" to put it in internet lingo.

I was taught to suppress and hide by my dad, and basically my dad's whole side of the family. We have a kind of nudge you in the ribs type of love, where you were made fun of for pretty much anything stupid you did. I could never really tell if it was meant to be in good fun or for malicious intent, but I laughed along because some of it I found genuinely funny.

I know an autistic stereotype is calling them robots because they seem to lack any emotion, but I was really called that in elementary school and middle school before I found friend groups from the four high schools I went to. I wouldn't show any emotions, always being called creepy from the way I stared off into the distance with an unmoving face. I would always be called rude for saying something I thought was fine. I was the goodie two shoes, sucking up to my teachers. I wasn't subtle, lol.

Back to the emotions thing... why is it that I find clear, obvious emotional displays so... weird? Logically, I understand that emotions just are, and humans are intertwined with them as a necessary function like eating and waste removal. I wonder if it has something to do with my upbringing which I brought up earlier. Control I realize was a big theme within it, so maybe I'm just controlling my emotions on a subconscious level? Which - again - logically speaking, you can't control your emotions. But maybe because my old man had an underlying message of "presenting yourself properly is presenting yourself as a minimized version of you" I was conditioned to find emotional displays to be taboo.

I guess what runs through my head are questions like, "Why are you getting angry? Can't you just calm down? It shouldn't be that hard." But it is hard, which I reiterate, is something I understand logically. It's hard coming down from a "high" so to speak. "Why are you crying? It's not that serious." But it can be serious for some people. Not everybody can look at a situation factually like I can. "How are you THAT happy about this? It's not that big a deal." However, it can be, and I've only just now realized this after I allowed myself to show happiness towards my comfort items/hyperfixations. But I still ask these questions in my head, even though my brain knows the respective answers/rebuttals. It's only later on in life I realized my inner enemy - Logic.

Perhaps that's why I find emotions weird... Because I was taught to find logical ways of looking at/dealing with them. Sad situation? Just look at the situation through a logical lens or use your preferred suppression technique. Anger? Calm down immediately (by any means necessary), because anger is an emotion that gets you in the most trouble and makes you look like an immature brat. Happiness? All things you're happy about have real world benefits, so focus on those and logic your way to solutions to better your life. This is probably one of (the many) reasons I never found my birthday or Christmas to be enjoyable.

Granted, a lot of gift giving holidays were during years of tight financial situations, so you were more or less taught to ask for what you need instead of what you want. Which is probably why I found mundane items like hairbrushes and pants to be amazing gifts, while "fun" gifts like drawing supplies or toys were given a simple, "Cool." from me.

I hate emotions. It feels like I'll never understand them and by extension, the people who are attached to those emotions. It's much simpler to tone it down and appear "dead" for me, as it's a state I've grown to find comfort in. It's a problem I want to solve, but this is one instance where my logic is failing me, and I hate it.

Whenever I think about this, I'm in a mood I can't describe. I think it's sadness, but it might also be anger. Sometimes I feel like jealousy is in there, but again... I can never tell. Emotions aren't black and white. But sometimes I wish they were. It would make things a lot easier to understand on my end.

I'm curious to know if other people around have a similar or exact view on the things I've mentioned here. I can't be the only one who this weird relationship with emotions.

[hiddensneker]

As someone who doesn’t like it at all I can explain atleast my perspective

1. I don’t think it serves crystallizes story all that well. The point of the plot reveal was to turn Harumi against the overlord. Which I don’t think was effective at all because it came off that Harumi was just directing her anger at someone else instead of trying to fix her own issues. It would have been better if it was revealed that pythor, someone she’s working with, released the great devourer. Which causes her to doubt the overlords methods and lead better into a character arc

2. Yeah honestly it’s mainly the possession thing. It makes no sense why the overlord would feel the need to make her lay eggs or grow big and strong or eat everything if his only goal was to turn Garmadon evil. Especially since the great devourer didn’t benefit him in any way post bite. Even if we give the show the benefit of the doubt and assume the overlord only possessed the great devourer to bite garm. That still makes no sense because Garmadon has literally only ever been a hinderance to the overlord and his plan. Sure Garmadon released the overlord from the dark island (how is the overlord even able to posses the snake if he was on the dark island during this time anyway)? But Garmadon also

• married a historian who spend most of her life researching how to defeat the great devourer

• had a child who’s meant to fight and defeat the overlord

• blasted the mega weapon, aka golden power, into space

• fought against the overlord in s2

• had his blood cleared of venom after s2

• worked to get rid of the overlord in s3

• DIED and got sent to the cursed realm

• only came back because of Harumi (who the overlord didn’t even care about prior to this)

• went around killing people, something that the overlord does not want to do (he only wants to control them)

• helped kill the oni, the overlords only possible Allies

• fought against him AGAIN

For someone who this plot point is trying to portray as a evil mastermind, the overlord sure is an idiot

Personally for me I think ninjago has a huge issue portraying things in black and white (example: Harumi not doing anything to fix her behavior but being treated like she’s redeemed or welcomed back into Lloyd’s life for fighting the overlord). I think having a wild animal be responsible for things like harumi’s parents dying would have been a perfect way to show how bad things are not always the result of someone doing it maliciously. It just happens.

But instead that theme gets undermined because suddenly the overlord is the evil mastermind of everything that has and will ever happen. It just takes away so much nuance and morally grey areas to the show and it’s villains.

3. Idk where you guys are getting this “oh but the great devourer was hinted to being connected to the overlord since s2” from but it’s… not at all true?

Yes the great devourers venom raised the stone army. But it also raised the stone army toys. Aka random plastic. Which means that the venom most likely has nothing to do specifically with the stone warriors and it’s just a property of the venom in general.

And also since I already reblogged a post similar to this I’ll say it again. No, the great devourer was not in any overlord prophecy until like crystallized.

And that comic from s1 is being taken out of context. Yes the comic states that the great devourer was a regular snake who got turned evil by darkness. But not ONCE was the overlord mentioned. It’s important to remember that the comics and the show have nothing to do with eachother and they don’t at all effect their plots. Tommy himself has admitted he’s never even read the comics. Which leads to a lot of inconsistencies between the show and the comics. Which means, most likely, that this comic was written without the preconceived notion that the overlord even existed.

What most likely happened was that the overlord biting the great devourer was a popular fanon idea, mostly because of the movie. But wasn’t made official until crystallized. Which is causing people to assume that this idea had been official way before the season because of people talking about it. Which leads me to

4. It’s Fan service

One of my biggest gripes with crystallized is that it tries to make the fandom happy by including plot points or fandom stuff to make the fandom happy with it. And I’m not just pulling this out of my ass, bragi himself admitting to wanting to put fan service and call backs in. Normally if it’s a small cameo then it’s fine. But in cases like these, to me atleast I think it’s clear that they went with this plot point instead of the pythor one to appease to fans. Without really considering the story or lore behind it. Which is no appropriate way to write a story for a tv show. Yes you can appreciate your fans for supporting you. But the goal of any show creator should be to tell a good story first and appease to fans second. Because if you appease to fans then shit like crystallized happens. And we get shitty people cameo in a show.

To be honest, I'm kinda confused ab why people... didn't like the whole "Overlord created the Devourer" thing. Doesn't it just. make sense? I mean, it was the goop(? blood???) of the Devourer that reawakened the Stone Army, so wouldn't it make sense that she had smth to do with the Overlord?

Or is it the whole "I possessed her" thing? I'm actually rlly confused someone please explain :( /gen

[belphegorbillickin]

Honestly, I love Mammon but I'm sick of his sweetness. I see him EVERYWHERE, and it's like the others don't exist. I like it when characters lose their calm you know? Esp that time when we reject Satan's pact, I really liked how he got worked up over such a thing lmao. And of course, most of the ones who tried killing mc had stupid reasons, except for Lucifer imo, but since when did demons make sense?

Alright, sure, they can still be sweet, but imagine if they ACTUALLY were dark characters. Corrupting human souls, selfish desires, blah blah. I'm not saying they can't love mc, ofc they can be sweet and lovable, but that doesn't mean they'd lose their normal habits and quirks. You cannot differentiate between them and normal humans now. The traits that would portray them as demons isn't there.

And perhaps yes, routes would've been fun. Right/wrong answers? Seems legit lmao. But like you said, the characters could've been done so much better.

I liked them at the start, now that I think of it asmo was never really what he seemed to be at the start, but in the recent events to me, at least, he's all but that. Diavolo, Barbatos, they have potential to be dark characters lmao. Asmo too, esp abt Helene, he sure was manipulative. Seeing Satan just be about cats/books upsets me bcuz he's one of my favs, and like you said, I feel he could've been a MUCH better character, plus idk he seems like he could be dark too. Other than beel & mammon, and I really don't know about belphie since he's become pretty sweet now, I feel everyone else could be written as characters with darker, more fitting demon personalities.

Though I love how we can go on about one topic for ages lmao. Lmk if my rambles become too annoying lol – 🍹

Don't worry about it, I really enjoy talking about it and I'm the queen of rambling lol. It's actually kinda hard for me to be concise when it comes to things like this.

And yes! Satan's reaction to rejection was exactly what I was thinking about when I mentioned that. I don't doubt most of the others would've reacted the same either tbh, but the difference between his reason for wanting to kill MC and his brothers' felt very different imo.

I'm kinda repeating myself, but I think people really overlook how cold Asmo was regarding getting MC killed. In that sense I can see how they get along with each other so well. I think I huge part of that is people coming in knowing that they're all gonna love MC and MC can't die so they don't even think about threats or subtle manipulation, but he's one of the most malicious imo since it was so cool-headed and planned.

Kind of like the theories about Barbatos and/or Diavolo purposefully sending you to a traumatic death because executing Belphie would cause the brothers to revolt. (Which I believe to extent btw.) Those four stand out as a lot more demonic imo because they can't be called crimes of passion. I miss the days where they both just casually admitted to taking part in a torture dungeon.

Personally I love the idea of unavoidable demonic corruption. Like the "tragic lovers suffering from fate" trope but where the demon isn't just an innocent victim that can't control it at all and MC doesn't just take it happily without consequences.

I'm not against MC suffering the consequences of a demon boyfriend, far from it, but even if you don't go the direct route there's so many ways to do it.

Even just slowly losing your morals because all the demons (and old-ass human with some most likely odd moral quirks, if only from being alive so long in horrible times) around you treat horrible things as something as mundane as breathing. Even if they snap back at least acknowledging it is a huge step up.

I'd be terrified and paranoid 24/7 knowing everyone around me wants to literally eat me and has eaten humans before. Even if they hated the taste or something knowing they're capable of it is scary af.

Like a Beelzebub who truly doesn't mean to hurt MC but doesn't think twice about breaking their beloved pet's bones right in front of them. A Beelzebub that finds it just as hard to avoid eating humans as he did in the intro even when he knows he shouldn't harm MC's family.

Or even just a Beelzebub so wracked by guilt and light on morals that can't bring himself to not always enthusiastically take Belphie's side even when he knows it's hurting MC. A kind of parasitic relationship where Beel guilts MC into staying and helps Belphie trap & manipulate them in ways Belphie could never do by himself.

A Leviathan that finds it increasingly hard to keep his jealously inwards now that he has someone to fight for and can't feel secure unless he can feel their envy. A Belphegor that slowly manipulates MC into abandoning all of their responsibilities and friends until their life is ruined and they have to depend on him.

I get that some of them are a bit harder to do without reminding people of irl abuse they may have faced, namely Satan, Levi, Lucifer, and ofc Asmo, but there are ways to make it more supernatural and less mundane. Besides there are way, way worse otomes out there that don't even market themselves as dark like Obey Me did.

I find it interesting that so much of the fanbase absolutely hates those kind of themes when they're so hard to avoid in otome and it was kind marketed towards people who like it. Like I genuinely wonder how they heard about it and got through demons insulting & trying to kill them in the early days of Obey Me before you knew they got better.

In the end though none of that can really happen without routes imo. Those kind of storylines can't be done well in the 10 seconds of individual interaction we get, even a whole lesson is too little time. And again even people who like darker things might freak out when Asmo's the one doing it or get turned off by Levi so they won't risk their money. It's so frustrating seeing the lost potential and knowing it's probably never gonna happen.

Speaking of I always thought Mammon was pretty robbed too. Not only did he never have the same freedom to harm MC as the others, but he was also directly responsible for their safety. Like sure they'd all be punished, but you have a different mindset when an authority figure constantly makes you aware and you have more chances to bond.

I think even cannon Mammon would've been more dangerous and a lot more rude if he wasn't their babysitter. The others, except Satan & Belphie ofc, probably would've been "nicer" and more controlled knowing Lucifer was breathing down their neck too imo.

Like he does seem less violent and hot-headed than the others, but they're not the same circumstances. Even a while after the pact he'd probably sell MC in an instant if he knew he wasn't going to be severely punished.

A lot of his possessiveness feels like a dog guarding a bone rather than true jealously imo, even when they're doing it as endearing thing. People automatically assuming he was lying when he said he'd rather MC die than be saved by someone else, but was he really at that point? Just because someone is tsundere at times doesn't mean they're incapable of being honest or not that into someone.

That's also kinda what I meant by infatuation too. Like sure they could like a human, but that doesn't mean they'll be that upset when they die or will never get bored. It's kind of like those people that immediately get a new pet after theirs dies, or even before so they don't have to be without a dog for a single second. Or the kind of demon that wants to "ruin" you with their sin until you can't go on as the ultimate act of love, even though they know it'll kill you.

[sleepymouses]

tagged by @littlepetbee, thank uuuu <3 i spent way too long thinking about htis lol,

Rules: pick 5 shows, then answer the following questions, tag a bunch o ppls to do it too (if y’all want to, supes no pressure or anything!)

Natsume yuujinchou  (a teenage orphan who sees spirits/monsters sets out to free the spirits who were bound in magical contract by his grandmother after he inherits a powerful book, aided primarily by a spirit who appears as an exasperated fat cat (who is just as fun as he sounds). Titular character is like my Fave boy in the whole world, he’s so kind and soft despite all the hardships he’s faced, the series has very gentle pacing/character development, and each episode is a carefully crafted lil story that have often moved me to tears, chuckles, or outright chinhands of fondness as u watch natsume slowly find a home in the world and amongst the humans &spirits around him. big focus on friendships, there’s like no romance with any of the main characters, lots of cool different creatures (most of whom arent all that scary once u get to know them), its just literally everything i could ever dream for in a show and it exists! <3)

Leverage (team of modern day robin hoods ruin rich peoples’ lives via  delightfully crafted spy cons to give back to the regular folks the rich people hurt. Extremely good, strong found family vibes, and v cathartic)

Brooklyn 99 (follows diverse cast of character who make up a NY precinct. Hilarious, immensely wholesome & groundbreaking, & probs the most lighthearted crime show besides like psych tbh)

Blackspot/Zone Blanche (spoopy french/belgium crime series set in a small village way out in the mountains surrounded by misty, mysterious and murdery woods. eerie and atmospheric, but also like one of my fave characters (everyone calls him teddy bear) keeps a pet guinea pig at work, so it’s not entirely grim and bleak)

Longmire (a modern western crime drama centering around the titular sheriff and others in their small town wyoming county, well written and lot of chracter development revealed alongside some really good case mysteries bc i love trying to figure out whodunits apparently based on a book series well adored by dads btw)

who is your favorite character in 2? (leverage) ahhh,,, this is hard... Eliot maybe? like Hardison is baby ofc, but i relate to elliot a ton (i think if i was on a team i would want to be the hitter tbh?) and love the subversion of so many action hero tropes that he is, also endlessly amused by how very put upon he is despite all his rad/random skills

who is your least favorite character in 1? (natsume yuujinchou) oh seiji matoba for sure, he can go eat a mouldy tree stump. absolutely evil nasty dude

what is your favorite episode of 4? (blackspot) the end of the road. great opening, didnt end up too devastating unlike a lot of the cases, Hermann was gr8, cool twist i hadnt super expected in the plot which was neat.

what is your favorite season of 5? (longmire) probs 1, walter reeally started to piss me off being Such A Man in later seasons, also me being extremely anxious about Henry and his life choices later, that creepy stalker storyline starting up with Someone and when Someone else in the main cast got died really suddenly and upsettingly later on as well, also when a weird relationship started between some of the characters that i really aint feeling so. before all that happened was nice (also sorry if this is super vague, im trying to avoid spoilers)

who is your favorite couple in 3? (B99) Besides Jake/Amy and Holt/Kevin (bc oviously theyre gr8) uh.. i know it was a long time ago and didnt last very long, but i thought rosa and marcus were really sweet? it brought another layer out to her character, even when they broke up that helped rosa starting to show emotional vulnerability and all, even tho it ended it was still just, idk, i liked them.

who is your favorite couple in 2? (leverage) Does trio count, cos Parker/Eliot/Harding 4 life yo

what is your favorite episode of 1? (natsume yujinchou) i have sooo many faves ahhh!!! i dont think i could pick just one on pain of death, every episode is acrefully cosntructed gem all on its own and i have too many that i love and adore to pick jsut one :((

what is your favorite episode of 5? (longmire) Dog soldier!! ive rewatched that one a ton, so so many good bits, really satisfying resolution of the case despite the shitty system that was revealed, and i rmr getting chills by the end the first time i saw it.

what is your favorite season of 2? (leverage) i guess season 1? just, idk, everything being set up and watching all these grumpies/less grumpies who have no plans to stay together start working together as a baby team, and just the joy of seeing their first heist together with the first plot twist, just.. such a delight, but all seasons that ive seen so far were all excellent, it’s a stellar show

how long have you watched 1? (natsume yujinchou) oh idk exactly, like years and years man... defs the longest out of all on this list

how did you become interested in 3? (b99) i think it was just on netflix way back in season 1 and i started watching it, loved it and never stopped? i think that might have even been before it got rlly popular lol

who is your favorite actor in 4? (blackspot) i dont rlly know any of these french peeps? but teddybear’s one of my fave characters, so hopefully the person who plays him is also cool, in which case hubert delattre (if not, Suliane Brahim does a v good job as the lead)

which do you prefer, 1, 2, or 5? (natsume yujinchou, leverage or longmire) um... real torn between natsume and leverage here, they’re both such lovely gems that do found family so, so well.. leverage is a team of modern robin hood-esque spies with brilliant writing and exciting heists and multiple delightful plot twists every episode and great character building and so much catharticism in ruining evil rich peoples lives.

but natsume’s title character is one of my very favorite characters ever, hes been through so much but he becomes the most kindest and thoughtful boy ever, and its so, so soft and gentle in its development of characters and their slow build of getting to know each other and becoming friends, and the interactions with the paranormal world are very rarely entirely malicious/scary, and there’s pretty well no romance, at least like no romance for plot/with the main characters anyways, and there’s lots of female characters who have important roles but arent sexualized/killed off for man feels/exist for romo (which sadly cannot be said about a lot of media, especially manga/anime tbh, even leverage does not win entirely on that front).. its defintiely my favorite anime ever (i dont watch loads, but literally no other one can ever come close to topping its perfection),

i guess tho, leverage is over, and natsume is still technically ongoing, so i guess for that then i have to go with natsume?

which show have you seen more episodes of, 1 or 3? (natsume yuujinchou or b99) Natsume for sure, they’re so short its easy to power thru like half a season in an afternoon

if you could be anyone from 4, who would you be? (blackspot) i would probably want to be someone who didnt live in villefranche actually haha uh, it’s a pretty spoopity place.. even some of the characters i do like make some Bad decisions that are v bothersome. Dr. Leila barami seems to have a good head on her shoulders tho, so if i Must be a character here then let’s go with her

would a crossover between 3 and 4 work? (b99 or blackspot) oh god... the cheery upbeat department at the 99 meet up with a grim, misty tiny mountain forest village with bleak day to day life, solving crimes amidst small town paranoia and weird maybe cult-related conspiracies and honestbhly something/s paranormal and menacing going on in the woods?? i just... cant see any of the characters even interacting lol, im just picturing jake’s confused befuddled face when he hears something weird but like x 10000

pair two characters in 1 who would make an unlikely but strangely okay couple? (natsume yujinchou) hm... i mean, one of the things i love about Natsume is that there arent really any romo relationships tbh? at least not with any of the main characters in the main storyline (so far), just like the odd one-off of minor characters (and takashi’s adopted parents ofc, but that’s different). so, yeah, i cant really think of one (although i think the big fandom fave ship of takashi and his worst enemy is rlly.. nope, and i dont know what’s going on there? takashi and tanama however, that would make sense, tho it is not unlikely so i cant answer this question with them)

overall, which show has the better storyline, 3 or 5? (b99 or longmire) b99! cos ya know my annoyances with some of the stuff happening later on in longmire lol, b99 just got better n better as it went along, and it’s still going :’)

which has the better theme music, 2 or 4? (leverage or blackspot) blackspot has a real good eerie atmospheric theme which is gr8 and i love it <3 (leverage’s tune is like, elevator music/cheesy jazzy spy tune, which does suit it tho lol)

and idk, anyone bored and stuck at home who wants to do this? no pressure if ur like nah but if u wanna go ahead.... @creepy-friend-of-darkness @anna-wa @rhinky-thingz @rexbasileus @aeolian-harp @warrenkoles @softbrobarnes @damnitttana @cluelesswolf @moondoggiestyle @blloodorangeisthenewblack @my-nail-beds-suck @frankiecolours @savvylikeyeahhh @lake-effectkidx @justhugharry @casualmisandry @j4ya @galaxygalpals @thesecondwarm @dealwright @knipperdollin @curlycombover @kaspbrakeddie (and if i didnt tag u and u still wanna do this, consider yeself tagged)

[surreal-honeypot]

Parkner Week Day Two Title: A Perfect Night Prompt: Prom

Character Tags: Peter Parker, Harley Keener, Michelle Jones, Ned Leeds, Betty Brant, Shuri, Abby Keener, Harley’s little sister, mentioned Tony Stark

Relationship Tags: Peter Parker/Harley Keener, Michelle Jones/Shuri, Ned Leeds/Betty Brant

Additional Tags: Day Two of Parkner Week, Parkner Week 2019, Prom, Getting Together, Not Endgame Compliant, Not Infinity War Compliant, Tony doesn’t sell the tower, Idk why, Fluff, This was meant to be cute but I think I did a bad job

Summary: “You need some help with that?”

Peter looked slightly embarrassed, but he nodded, looking up at Harley through his eyelashes.

Cute.

Harley stepped into Peter’s personal space, suddenly realizing that this was either a really bad idea, or his best idea yet. Upon seeing Peter’s face pink, Harley decided that it was easily his best idea yet. Harley reached up and paused.

“What did you do to this poor tie?”

“Peter. Nothing is going to happen. Homecoming was a fluke! School dances are not out to get you,” Ned tried reasoning.

“See, you say that, but you’re wrong.” MJ raised an unimpressed eyebrow, while Ned, who was standing next to her, crossed his arms with a deadpan look.

“Uhuh. And your reasoning here, Parker?”

“MJ, we all know what happened on homecoming night sophomore year, and then on prom, do you remember what happened?”

“You rushed away to go be Spider-Man.”

“Exactly! And at homecoming this year, what happened?”

Ned sighed.

“You rushed away to go be Spider-Man.” Neds repeated, voice flat. “Man, I still don’t see the problem here. You think school dances are out to get you, but to me it seems like Spider-Man is out to get your social life. Just come out, have fun for a night... Maybe invite Harley?” Ned’s voice turned teasing.

Peter felt his face go red.

“What?! No, I-”

“To me, it seems like you were just trying to get out of homecoming because you don’t want to ask anyone, and Ned and I won’t be around to hold your hand this year.” MJ’s words were blunt, but not malicious. They were also, unfortunately, true.

MJ had asked out Shuri months ago, and upon hearing about prom, Shuri jumped at the chance to go. Peter had the distinct feeling that she would be disappointed, Midtown wasn’t exactly known for their wonderful school dances, but he wasn’t going to tell her that. Ned, was once again, dating Betty. They had a rather consistent on-again off-again relationship. Peter, on the other hand, was as single as a pringle.

This didn’t stop MJ and Ned from teasing him about Harley, however, who had moved in with Mr. Stark nearly a year before and who Peter had been hardcore crushing on ever since. It seemed like the more he got to know the other boy, the more he liked him.

Harley was gorgeous and funny, Harley was super smart while also being adept at socializing, he was chaotic and very capable of wielding his tongue like a weapon, but he could also be so sweet, and Peter was absolutely smitten.

“Even if I thought that Harley would say yes, I can’t. Abby is coming up the same day as prom, and I don’t want to take away from their time together. Based on that alone, Harley would probably say no.”

MJ and Ned exchanged looks.

“We obviously can’t convince you, and maybe you’re right, you know Harley better than we do. But what if you’re wrong? Don’t you want the chance, at least?”

Peter frowned and shrugged a bit helplessly. It didn’t matter whether he did or not, he wouldn’t be selfish and take away from Harley’s time with Abby. They only got to see each other every couple of months or so, even though Peter knew that they texted each other often and video called once a week.

Harley very obviously missed her and his mom, even though he was too stubborn to admit it. He had moved in with Tony for his senior year because the internship would look good on his college applications, and--although Harley had only admitted this to him in the dead of the night, while they were binging bad horror movies and eating junk food--he thought that it would lower the financial burden so his mom didn’t have to work so much.

Knowing all of that, how could Peter ask Harley to homecoming without feeling guilty? It would be putting Harley in a tough spot. He would either say yes, and then feel guilty about ditching Abby, or he would say no and that would make things awkward between them and Harley would probably feel guilty about that too and-

Peter cut off his inner ramblings. All these what if’s were pointless, because he wasn’t going to ask Harley in the first place.

I--II--II--III--II--II--I

Peter had decided that if he was going to skip homecoming, then he might as well do something else fun. It was because of this thought that Peter was currently entering the penthouse to put his stuff down before heading down to Mr. Stark’s lab.

“Hey Pete!” Harley called.

“What’s up? Where’s Abby? I thought she was coming today?”

“Oh. Yeah. That got rescheduled for next week. It turns out her best friend is throwing her birthday party tomorrow, and Abby doesn’t want to miss it. What about you? MJ told me that your homecoming was tonight.”

Peter froze. Of course she did.

“Eh, I was going to be wallflowering the entire night. MJ and Ned both have dates, and I didn’t want to go stag.”

It wasn’t the whole truth, but it certainly wasn’t a lie.

“Why didn’t you ask someone then? You could have asked someone to go with you as a friend, if nothing else.”

Peter stared flatly.

“Harley, I have four and a half friends. Four of which are going together.”

“A half?”

“I’m not super close with Betty.”

“Alright, but that still leaves one more friend.”

Peter stared some more. Was Harley really going to make him spell this out?

“Harley, you’re the last friend.”

“Yeah, and your point is?”

“You were busy.”

“And now I’m not. Do they sell tickets at the door?”

“Yeah, but-”

“Cool, go get dressed. I really doubt Tony’s known you this long and let you get away with not owning a suit. We’ll meet back here in 20. I expect your hair to look presentable.” With that, Harley marched off to his room, leaving Peter behind reeling. What just happened? I--II--II--III--II--II--I Harley’s lips quirked up when he saw Peter come out of his room. His suit was a bit rumpled, and his hair was still a bit messy, even if it was obvious that Peter had tried to tame it. He was fiddling with his tie, and failing at tying it. Harley’s smile widened when he noticed that it was the same shade of red as his.

“You need some help with that?”

Peter looked slightly embarrassed, but he nodded, looking up at Harley through his eyelashes.

Cute.

Harley stepped into Peter’s personal space, suddenly realizing that this was either a really bad idea, or his best idea yet. Upon seeing Peter’s face pink, Harley decided that it was easily his best idea yet. Harley reached up and paused.

“What did you do to this poor tie?”

The tie was knotted and tangled, and just slightly too tight around Peter’s neck. That had to be uncomfortable.

Peter’s face was completely red now, a sheepish smile pulling at his lips.

“I only ever had YouTube videos to go off when tying a tie, and to be honest that confused me even more. My aunt probably knows how, its just that it never occurred to her to teach me.”

“Then how did you wear ties in the past? I know I’ve seen you wearing them in photos, and such.”

“They were clip-on. Don’t tell Mr. Stark!”

“Hmmm. I think I just might, After all, he would want to know that his protege doesn’t know how to tie a tie, don’t you think?” Tony would definitely be scandalized. Maybe Harley would put this in his repertoire of black mail.

The knot finally came undone. Harley smiled triumphantly.

“Now, you cross this end over this one, see how this side is thicker? And then you wrap it around like this, pull this end through here, and then you pull.” As Harley pushed the knot up to Peter’s neck, he couldn’t help but feel like one of the little old ladies who always tied their husbands tie in the movies.

Harley looked up at Peter’s face, and abruptly remembered just how close they were standing. He swiftly took a step back, and blinked. Peter looked… disappointed?

Harley cleared his throat.

“Right then. You ready?”

“Ready.”

I--II--II--III--II--II--I

Peter’s prom wasn’t as fancy as Harley was expecting. For a somewhat high class school, the decorations were rather cheesy. Judging by the look on Peter’s face, he thought so too. Most of the decoration consisted of fairy lights, a few blue and yellow colored gobo’s, and swaths of transparent fabric hung artistically. Upon further inspection, there were also a few fake tree’s.

“The decorations are like this every year. Not horrible, but a bit lackluster, and most of the time you can’t even tell what the theme is.”

Before Harley could respond, Ned materialized beside them, with Betty on his arm.

“I thought you weren’t going to come? What happened with Harley’s little sister?”

Harleys eyebrows shot up. There was seemingly no correlation between the two comments unless… Had Peter been going to ask him?

Harley was once again interrupted before he got the chance to speak.

“Yes, what happened with Harley’s little sister?” MJ was smirking, like she knew something that they didn’t. Shuri, who was standing next to her, looked amused, as if she was in on a secret the rest of them weren’t allowed to know.

“Her trip was rescheduled for next week. It was really sudden actually. You’d think she’d be more careful planning her trip around the time of her best friend’s birthday. Actually, come to think of it, didn’t Julie already have her birthday this year?” Harley frowned, slightly confused.

MJ’s smirk widened.

“Well, have fun! Lets go raid the food table,” Shuri directed the last part to MJ.

“Ooh! I love this song! Let’s go dance!” Betty quickly pulled Ned over to the dance floor, leaving Harley and Peter alone together again.

“Did that seem a bit off to you?”

“Yeah, but with MJ, it's better not to question.”

Harley thought that that was a fair assessment, and decided to put the incident out of his mind. For now. For now, Harley would go dance with Peter and drink watered down punch and eat cupcakes that were just a tad too sweet. For now, Harley would listen as the playlist slowly progressed to slower and slower songs. And for now, Harley would get to hold Peter in his arms as they slowly drifted from side to side.

I--II--II--III--II--II--I

“Thank you. For coming with me, that is. It was a lot more fun than I thought it would be.”

Harley resisted the urge to let out a smart ass comment, like isn’t everything fun when I’m involved? and instead just took a step closer. They were back where it all began, in the tower. The night had gone by quickly, and Harley was tired. But not too tired for this.

Harley took another small step, invading Peter’s personal bubble once more.

“Not a problem, darling.” Harley drawled quietly, not wanting to ruin the atmosphere between them. “Your prom may have sucked, but it was fun.”

Peter didn’t respond, instead moving closer to Harley and gently slotting his lips against Harley’s. The kiss was slow, lazy. It was fairly obvious to both that neither one knew quite what they were doing, with Harley having come from a small town in Tennessee and Peter being awkward and well, Peter. Despite that though, it was nice.

A perfect ending to a good night.

I--II--II--III--II--II--I

Harley was sliding into his bed when his phone rang on his bedside table.

“Hello?”

“Hey Harley! How did your date with Peter go?”

“How did you know about that?”

“Did you kiss? I have a bet with MJ.”

“MJ? How do you know MJ?”

“Bye Harley, see you next week!”

“Abby? Don’t you dare hang-”

Click.

[spelviin]

endgame thoughts, not because i think i have anything valuable to say abt it, more just bc i want to get my initial unsullied opinions out before various overly nitpicky or overly praisy internet thinkpieces come around

okay so. first of all, i’m tired to death of the way folks talk about the mcu. like, it’s either a godly feat of everything and the most important thing ever or the literal devil incarnate and the source of all evil in this world. i am literally so fucking bored of both these perspectives and have zero time for either of them. 

yes, the mcu is emblematic of a lot of problems in the current state of the film medium as a whole. yes, it is also a really cool feat of storytelling that a whole bunch of movies spanning a whole bunch of years could all come together and culminate in a big huge blowout finale. yes, it could have been far better, but yes, it also could have been far worse. 

i wasn’t a fan of thor being a punchline in this film. like, the whole “lol thor fat” thing was like, really tired and not cool. and the fact that his genuine moments of expressing grief and the significant trauma he’s been through were played off for laughs more often than not bc “lol thor supposed to be big many man but he’s crying like a wimpyboy instread.” like, fucking please. it’s 2019 and other male characters were allowed to be shown crying and processing their trauma but thor’s??? not allowed for some reason??? anyway they did him dirty in this movie and i’m not super pleased abt that. 

i didn’t like that they fridged natasha. i’m not a fan of scarjo so much these days, but i did like natasha. 2012 me adored her and was 100000% behind her as the Only Woman (despite being miffed that she was the Only Woman) and i really liked her character and redemption arc through the films that she appeared in. and like, i get the justification for fridging her. like i get that she was this assassin who killed a bunch of folks and in the end, not only wiped out the red in her ledger, but saved the whole damn universe in doing so. i get that. i’m just annoyed that they literally went and fridged the Only Woman to give the boys manpain before the third act. 

speaking of the ladies.... the One Scene Where Women Get To Do Things. my god. the critical feminist part of my mind greatly resented the obvious lip service of that scene, and the fact that the ladies only got the one shining moment before we got back to the sausage fest. but lord, the lesbian part of my mind hella enjoyed it. like i was legit bouncing in my seat like YESSSS FUCK EM UP LADIES i was just completely stoked. 

and my god. MY GOD CAN WE TALK ABOUT CAROL’S HAIRCUT AKA A GIFT TO THE LESBIANS. THIS MOVIE HAS MANY SINS BUT WE CAN ALL THANK IT FOR THAT HAIRCUT. (and again, feminist me is like, hey, dont focus on her appearance, focus on the important shit she did in singlehandedly turning the battle around for everyone, but lesbian lizard brain is hhhhhhhhhhhhh girl hot)

anyways. 2012 me was a month out of a major jaw surgery when i saw the first avengers, puffy faced, on heavy painkillers, and unable to eat any solid foods, and just generally weak and miserable. i dragged myself to the theatre and i smiled the whole way through that movie bc even though i was feeling super shitty, that 360 shot of the team made me so excited and happy. so happy that i watched and rewatched a bootleg download over what was probably the worst summer of my life, and it made me happy and gave me hope, dumb as that may sound. 

i havent watched the first avengers movie in a long time, and i’m not sure if i’d feel the same way seeing it now. remembering how it felt then still makes me happy, but seeing that same 360 shot repeated in endgame didnt stoke much emotion. tumblr fandom took a lot of my avengers joy away. the drama and character hate and constant complaining and cringe culture bullshit exhausted me. and the recent turns of the mcu also contributed to that. a lot of things contributed to it, i guess. but i dont feel as happy as i once did. so a lot of this movie rang a little bit hollow, needless to say. 

that being said, though, i did feel a little flicker of that joy. for all the movie’s and the franchise’s faults, of which there are many, i can say that the moment where all those portals opened up and the revived characters stepped though, i felt that happiness again. i legit almost cried when i saw shuri’s silhouette step out of that circle. that moment when the score came in with that booming version of the avengers theme, i was 2012 me again, just for a moment, and i think that’s worth something. to me, that’s worth something. so for all its sins, i thank the movie for that. 

this is rly rambly and im tired so im just gonna say 2 more things. things i’m not personally super invested in, but other people are, and so i feel i need to have an opinion on em.

first is bucky. i fucking adore him, and i am kinda miffed that he got like, no interactions with steve. i know steve/peggy is the canon ship, i knew it was always endgame (heh) and that stucky is just a fandom thing. but god damn it, even if they were never gonna have their relationship go there (which tbh i literally never even came close to expecting to happen) it still feels a little bit unfair to have steve basically ignore probably the most important person in his life. like, i know he wanted to live his happy straight life with peggy, and passing on the shield and identity of captain america to sam is super important, and i loved that moment and would never begrudge him that bc i adore sam. i was just... really sad that bucky had to get kinda shafted for that. (literally all i was saying in the last half hour was “but where’s bucky? but what about bucky?” our boy deserved better. 

second is tony. tony tony tony. i know folks have a lot of strong feelings about him, both ways. i know of folks who think he’s the scum of the earth for some dumb reason, and i personally know others who think the entire mcu should revolve around him, for equally dumb reasons. i’m more neutral. i think he’s a good character who made questionable decisions in the past. i feel for him and his struggles with PTSD. i respect him as a character in-universe and also for what he and RDJ accomplished. like, if he hadn’t hit it out of the park with that first movie like a fucking decade ago, none of this would have been possible, and i think that’s pretty damn cool, regardless of feelings on the monster juggernaut the mcu has turned into. basically, i know some folks are maliciously rejoicing at his death while complaining that he got a hero’s send-off when he is a Bad And Not Morally Pure Man, which is. boring. and other people (namely one who i know personally in my family) who are mad because he is an Angel and deserved the Best Happy Ending Because No Bad Things Are Allowed To Happen To This Perfect Boy. i’m not here for either opinion. i’m okay that he died (peter crying over him did get to me in a huge way, but i think tom holland just has a power that if he’s crying, i’m crying so idk). i think it’s cool that he got to save everyone and got a heroic and well deserved send off. this isnt a revolutionary opinion i just wanted to throw it out there bc im bored with the polarization. 

and... yeah? i think that’s it? sorry, im really tired and this probs doesn’t make sense but i just felt like i had to get the initial reactions and feelings down before the thinkpieces get to me lmao. 

oh, also nebula deserved better 2kforever i just love her a lot and want her to be happy and not suffer, kthxbye 

[surveys4ever]

6.

What’s the last vegetable you ate, and when did you eat it? I put red bell peppers in the breakfast burritos we had for dinner last night!

What was your last Facebook notification for? Someone requested to join a group I admin.

What bands have you seen live? Sadly I haven’t seen many bands live. Last ones I saw were Paramore and X Ambassadors!

Tell me an interesting fact about your mother: Ummm...she got weight loss surgery a few years ago.

What do you think is the most important thing to happen to you before the age of 13? My dad left and my mom remarried and had a bunch more kids she likes more than me.

What were you super against as a young child but aren’t anymore? Cheesecake, broccoli, water, atheists. Now cheesecake is my favorite, I love broccoli, water is the only thing I drink, and I AM an atheist.

What are your plans later today? I have to shower and make dinner. Other than that idk.

Are you doing anything exciting this weekend? Sadly probably not. Beebs works so I’m probably just gonna work on a sewing project or something.

Who do you talk to the most? My husband or our dog!

What are some things you do regularly that make you feel old? Go on TikTok.

Who is your best guy friend(s)? My husband!

Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? I’m good where I’m at!

If you had a tiny scar on your face, would you get it removed or just keep it? It depends on the scar and its placement. I’d probably get it removed tho.

Have you had an x-ray in the past year? Nope! Last one was in the 9th grade.

Do you think your first love still loves you? I’d sure hope so.

What is something that is “going right” in your life? We’re debt free for the first time since we got married, my husband is fixed, and we just finished getting a bunch of repairs done on our car!

When did you feel ready to start dating? I don’t think there was a moment I decided I was ready...it just happened!

When was the last time your pet bit you? If you don’t have a pet, have you ever been bitten by someone else’s? I mean...she’s never bitten me maliciously! Just playfully.

Where were you the last time you made out? In bed I believe.

When was the last time you cried tears of joy? When a company I’ve loved forever sent me a massive PR box with so much more than I could have ever expected. I sat on the kitchen floor and cried.

How do you type your sad smileys? :(

Do you have “decorative hand-towels” that cannot be used in your house? Nah!

What was the last soda you drank? I had a coke slushie earlier!

What was the last thing someone made fun of you for? I’m not sure! It was probably something silly my husband was teasing me for.

Have you ever had any type of surgery? No, thank god.

Should kids be allowed to get tattoos/piercings without parental consent? Yeah. It’s their body!

Who was the last person to hit on you? Some weirdo on the internet told me my bellybutton must smell like roses.

What was the last thing you decided not to do, that you were supposed to? Shower..oops.

What’s the hardest thing you’ve ever had to tell someone? I don’t know!

What do you put on hot dogs? Mayo, ketchup, mustard, and cheese.

Ever fallen in the shower? Slipped but not fallen!

Do you think that things will get better? I really hope so!

Have you ever legitimately saved a person’s life? Yup.

What’s your favourite book genre? I don’t know if I have one!

Have you ever walked out of a movie at the theatre? I almost walked out of Toy Story 4 because the people behind us were so goddamn rude and their kid kept pulling my hair.

Do dogs like you? Oh hell yeah.

Would you say that you project an air of authority? Maybe? I’m a bossy Capricorn so I exude some level of leadership but I’m also not comfortable being in charge of anyone.

Have you ever jumped off a high dive into a pool? Absolutely not.

Do you use one towel when you shower or two? Two! One for my hair and one for my body.

Have you ever been to one of the great lakes? Nope!

Who do you know that had a baby recently? Um! Lots of Facebook friends but no one personally.

Do you like Usher’s songs? Eh! They’re alright.

When was the last time you went to a waterpark? Oh god. Like 15 years ago.

Have you ever ridden a train? When I was a young tot, yes!

What do you eat your French fries with? Depends on the fry! Ranch is usually my favorite.

Do you have family problems? Hahahahaha....hahahaha...yes. So fucking many.

What’s the last food you ate that was stale? I don’t know? I don’t eat stale food very often.

How do you like your grilled cheese? Extra cheesy with tomato soup!

What is the most challenging meal you have ever cooked? Pasta aglio e olio!

What was your favorite thing to do as a little kid? Spend time with my grandma!

Have you ever been close to drowning? Nope.

Have you ever had a panic attack? Ugh, many times. They are terrifying.

Do you like doing housework? Sometimes! Other times I’d rather do l i t e r a l l y anything else.

Would you ever get implants? I want a breast lift but I’m afraid to go under anesthesia.

Do you own a robe? A few, yeah!

Do you have a little sister? What’s her name? Yup, but that’s none of your beeswax.

Do you like crust on pizza or do you cut it off? If it’s dominos, I just toss it but if it’s anything else, I’ll eat it!

What was the last song you listened to? I Don’t Wanna Wait by Paula Cole.

Have any of your family members been to jail? In laws, yes!

Is there anyone that you feel you still need some closure with? Yeah, sadly.

Can you remember when you first learned how to read? Yup! Kindergarten.

What event in your life has transformed your personality the most? Probably having to give up my childhood to be the big sister. I’m inherently motherly, I take care of everyone, but I have no desire to be a mother.

Have you ever had any teeth pulled? Just my wisdoms!

Do you still want to be what you wanted to be in elementary school? I wanted to be famous.

What’re some TV shows that you would like to get into? I feel like I watch all of the shows that interest me!

How would you feel if you were drafted for the military? Uh...no.

What is your favorite Queen song? Fat Bottomed Girls!

Do you know how to use any foreign currency? Well yeah but I mean...I’m not sure what there is to know about it? You go to the bank, exchange your money for the other money, and then spend it as you see fit. It’s a lot easier to just use your bank card tho.

Been kissed by someone who you knew was “bad” for you? Nope!

Ever taken an at-home pregnancy test? Yeahhhh, sadly. My period is a little bitch who likes to show up late a lot and I’m an anxious mess so I usually take tests to give me some peace of mind while I wait.

When was the last time you were at a loss of what to do? I’m never at a loss of what to do!

What did you do on your favorite date with a guy/girl? We went to a theme park! It was absolutely magical.

What’s a movie you have seen in the theater more than once? Inside out and Just Friends! We saw Inside Out by ourselves, with my husband’s best friend, and then with my family just because it was so fkn good. And then my best friend at the time was obsessed with Ryan Reynolds and saw it I think like 10 times by herself, 2 of which were with me.

What is the reason you’re still alive? My heart is still pumping?

Have you ever had sex in someone else’s bed/bedroom? I’ve had sex in my parents’ hotel room while they were down at the pool...sorry mom.

Do you ever brush your hair before you go to bed? I never brush my hair except for right after a shower. I have curly hair and brushing it is the literal worst thing you can do.

Have you ever had a dream about sleeping with a celebrity? (You don’t have to give details.) I don’t believe so!

Has anyone ever told you that they needed you? Do you think they meant it? Yes and yes!

How did you feel when you woke up today? What was the first thing you thought about? Bleary! My husband was calling me to wake me up.

Do you still tell your parents that you love them? I do, even when I don’t really want to.

Have you ever said “I love you” to someone you weren’t going out with? Friends and family, yeah.

Would you date someone with a physical disability? I mean, I'm married, but in a theoretical world where I was single, that wouldn’t be something that would deter me if I loved someone.

Think of the last person you had sex with. Do you think they’ve slept with anyone else since they last slept with you? He has not!

The last time you dyed your hair, what color did you dye it? Purple! That was only like 2 weeks ago.

Think of the last time you went out to eat. Who paid? We did!

Do you save at least 15 percent of your income? 20%, actually!

Do you ever go on Reddit? If so, what are some of your favorite subreddits? I’ve only ever gone to Reddit because Google suggested it to me to answer a question I had.

Were you ever a flower girl or ring bearer in anyone’s wedding when you were little? I was only 4 but I guess I was my mom’s maid of honor/flower girl at her wedding.

Are your parents in good health? My mom is but my dad has high cholesterol and bad back pain. Nothing super serious tho.

Have you ever been a caregiver to a sick/disabled relative? Nope!

Is there any type of medicine you can’t take? For what reason? Not that I’m aware of but most medications have weird affects on me. NyQuil makes me hallucinate, Novocaine makes me loopy, and oui’d makes me see shit, so?

Do you have a favorite pair of pajamas? What do they look like? I really just wear a T-shirt and shorts to bed.

Do you have any interesting pillow cases? All my pillow cases rn are vintage and I love them!

If something on your body hurts, which part is it most likely to be? I just have really sensitive feet and every pair rubs them raw or causes blisters/bleeding so they usually hurt.

Are you more afraid of spiders or bees? Spiders, definitely.

Have you ever worn fake nails? If so, what did the last pair you wore look like? I had acrylics for a year! I don’t remember the last set I had on tho.

Is Russian or Native American history more interesting to you? Native American.