#just tag or message me bc i'm GONNA wanna read it!

[sullina]

one of my favourite scenes in the first httyd movie is where Hiccup has to go into the village at night WITH Toothless in tow bc of the metal getting bent and him being unable to unhook himself from Toothless after a fall.

Because during essentially the entire bonding time between Hiccup and Toothless, the viking village had significantly less vikings in it. Stoick and a bunch of others were searching for the dragon nest, after all, and Gobber didn't seem to be keeping a particularly close eye on him either.

Which is also how Hiccup was able to work so freely on Toothless' new tailfin, both in the forge and at home (remember the many drawings he had on his desk and wall during the breast helmet scene?).

And i just picture like a fanfic or something where instead of just a quick scene, that moment of Hiccup taking a fucking Nightfury that was his FRIEND into the "kill all dragons on sight" village and having to get away with it.

Or Toothless, growing bored on his own and wanting to fly with Hiccup, sneaking into the village on his own to get Hiccup, bc he hasn't visited in a few days or something. Like, i know that would make Toothless stupid as hell and he's not stupid. You know actually maybe scratch that one.

Or imagine an au where, after Hiccup has already bonded with Toothless, a few dragon raids happen and the village notices that the Nightfury hasn't been with them in any of them, so they DO end up searching where Hiccup said to, and Hiccup joins the search, but in the hopes of KEEPING them from discovering Toothless, obviously. And with Hiccup having a habit of running off on his own, Stoick and/or Gobber are intent on keeping an eye on him. But also bc Hiccup's kinda the only one who has any clue where the nightfury could've landed, so...

And while the grove is fairly hidden, the search party closes in on it eventually bc vikings are stubborn as hell, leading up to Hiccup having to find a way to slip away and Get Toothless Out Of There by riding him. But a black dragon in broad daylight is very noticeable and there's not really any direction to get out of the grove but up.

(the same would apply to the test flight scene, but to be fair they were like MILES above the island and away from the village, so yeah that's not that unrealistic that they weren't spotted)

And this one is reaching into crack fic territory, but another fic where the nightfury reveal doesn't happen, neither with Astrid nor the rest of the village, so Hiccup, with not really anything better to do, decides to pull some pranks on the village with Toothless's help. Mostly on Snotlout. He gets some really good character development in the series, but yeah no he's kind of a jerk at the start.

Another fic where Hiccup bonds with not only Toothless, but also the other dragons in the arena and, this one has a bit of an angsty twist, he decides to leave the village entirely, revealing himself as "the lord of dragons" or something and leaves with a bang, taking every dragon with him, branding himself as a traitor to his village. This one has probably been done before, i won't lie.

And of course I'm always a slut for some capital-A Angst where Hiccup decides to just disappear with Toothless at the earliest opportunity, having decided that there's nothing left for him at the village, while Stoick is away in the search for the nest. Stoick would be fucking destroyed, man, first his wife dies and then his son disappears without a single trace. He just went missing, like he ran away, but that doesn't make sense bc they live on an island and all boats are accounted for. Stoick fears the worst.

Meanwhile, Hiccup is living isolated from humans, but getting along with dragons, but he may not have left the Archipelago, perhaps too anxious to go so far away from what he's known, perhaps he feels guilty over just leaving his dad behind like that, without even so much as a note.

When Hiccup wasn't found on Berk anywhere, and all his stuff was gone too (well most of it anyway), Stoick refused to believe that his only son was dead. Most others accepted that the heir to the village was gone...

Until some of the ships spot a human on a dragon and swear by Odin that the human looked an awful lot like their lost heir. From then on, Stoick becomes an absent chief, always out searching for his son, who, to his knowledge, may or may not be still out there.

Hiccup tries his best to avoid the viking ships for obvious reasons, but he'd be lying if he said he didn't kinda want to see his dad again. The guilt was eating him up inside and every single day he's been wondering if he made the right choice. Eventually, he decides to let Stoick find him on an island, and decides to tell him. He wonders if it's the right decision, but he couldn't forget the haunted look his father had the first time they both locked eyes after years of being apart.

Honestly, i don't know how this one would go. After years of sorrow, Stoick might be more accepting of dragons if Hiccup does his introduction right and eases into it. Or he might do some mental gymnastics and think that the dragons somehow brainwashed his son into betraying his people. Dunno how that would work, but i doubt Stoick would really be in the right mind after years of thinking his only son might be dead.

[seventh-district]

not even gonna tag this properly bc i don't wanna get Involved but i do have some Thoughts i need to get out into the void so here we go

(aaa quick edit: CW for mention/discussion of Boothill leaks)

[hunnymisworld]

How Haikyuu Characters would respond to you:

When you ask them for help in making the homework.

SFW | Fluff | Crack | Short AU

N E K O M A VER.

[ READ ME FIRST ]

C O N T E X T: You are a 1st year transfer student in Nekoma HIgh and you've already adjusted to your new environment as well as the new people you met whom you made friends with. You were having a hard time with a homework and decided to ask for help in your fellow classmates/seniors.

KUROO TETSURO

INTIMIDATING (he's smart and he's the captain of the vball team - WBK)

You hesitate to approach him because of his usual sly/serious facial expression.

He noticed you were trying to approach him so to your surprise he approached you instead.

"Hi Y/n, i see you've been looking at me and hesistating about something, is there something i can help you with?"

You shyly told him that you were struggling with chemistry homework and he didn't think twice in helping you.

"Sure! Here, let me see. I'll read it first then i'll explain it to you."

You see him nodding and humming as he scan through the pages of your notebook.

Believe it or not WITHIN 5 MINS. he suddenly closed the notebook and said "Alright, i see what your homework is about. Sit here beside me, i'll show you" while showing you a wide warm smile.

Mans a VISUAL LEARNER (he asked if it was okay for him to write on the back of your notebook - ofc you said yes)

He draws and writes things on the back of your note book and literally creates a framework guide for you to understand the concept of the lesson.

"Do you understand it better now?" (he won't mind to go over it again)

You easily understood what he taught you and you were amazed by how this man just made it easy like that. (Yes, effortlessly like that)

You thanked him and offered something to give him but he stopped you from there.

"No need y/n, I'm glad i was able to help you. Really, i mean it. You don't have to give anything" (but if you insist, i bet you he would agree eating ice cream with you after class - he ofc brings Kenma with him)

"If you're struggling with any homework, you can ask me or ask kenma. No worries, glad to be of help."

YOU ACED THE HOMEWORK!

KENMA KOZUME

Didn't notice you at first cause he's busy playing video games.

"Oh Y/n, sorry i was kinda busy- what can i do for you?"

He's just sitting there looking up at you, gameboy in hand.

When you told him you were gonna ask for help with regards to the homework (he tried to hide it but he was flustered & flattered that you thought he was THAT good that you asked him for help yourself) he just nodded and offered to take a look at your notebook.

He silently scanned through the pages and after a while he explained the concept to you.

The way he explained it was so detailed that you felt like your brain was overwhlemed with the information but at the same time you learned a lot from him.

"Do you understand the concept now? If not i can send you a file with a complete guide in it. I made it myself, if you need any other notes you can tell me." (he really made NOTES everytime he and kuroo studied cause he doesn't wanna ask kuroo again - best believe this man has COMPLETE notes)

He showed a small smile when you thanked him and you offered to buy him ice cream but he suggested another idea instead "An apple pie would great though, but you don't really have to give me anything. It's alright y/n"

You insisted - you ended up eating apple pie with kenma and he tagged Kuroo along (Kuroo is eating ice cream)

YOU ACED!!!

When you checked your notifications when you got home, he literally ended up sending you ALL OF HIS NOTES. He attached a message saying:

" You're welcome :)"

LEV HAIBA

You didn't have a hard time approaching him, he was approachable - But he was dumbfounded when you asked him about the homework.

"Huh?"

MANS WAS CLUELESS

"What homework?"

You were standing in front of him, (looking up - bc he was TALL) with a blank emotion in your face T.T (you thought to yourself: wDYM YOU DON'T KNOW THERE'S A HOMEWORK?!??!)

You were just in awe that he was clueless standing there (your jaw almost hit the floor) T.T

After a while of him trying to remember the homework, he was SHOCKED "RIGHT! THAT HOMEWORK!"

Asks you how to do it instead T.T

He suggested you both go to Kuroo to get help (HE REALLY SAID SOS T.T)

You both were tutored by Kuroo and both got PERFECT SCORES!! ^^

After that you became chaotic besties fr!! <3

MORISUKE YAKU

You were greeted by him with a warm smile as you approach closer.

"Hey Y/n! How are you?" (a warm ball of sunshine fr)

"I see, alright here let me see that" (HE DIDN'T THINK TWICE)

He scanned through it and let you sit beside him as he was trying to figure out at which part were you having a hard time. (He does not mind if he would go over it all again for a number of times - he would understand)

He explained the concept to you in its simplest form and you thanked him after.

He offered to get ice cream after (HE INSISTED TO PAY FOR IT)

You were flustered, you thought you were the one to buy him ice cream (he disagreed and pain immediately so that you won't pay for it)

P R I N C E S S T R E A T M E N T/?!?!?!

"I noticed you were getting anxious so i offered to eat ice cream to calm your nerves down. Cheer up y/n, you'll get through your 1st year smoothly. If you're having difficulties just message me or tell me okay?"

WORDS OFFF AFFIRMATION?????? COMFORT KING??

Pls he is so caring and a type that would know how to comfort you.

Yes, he offered to be you tutor too (FOR FREE!!!!!!!)

YOU ACED THE HOMEWORK (at this point you can graduate with flying colors bc of how good this man is in mentoring you)

E N D

note: part 2??

[notiddygothgf]

4. Taste Like Nicotine

★ pairings: aki hayakawa x fem reader

★ ❝ Go back to Himeno. ❞ ❝ No. That's not what you want. ❞

★ c.w.: suggestive themes, drinking (more content warnings and tags)

★ a/n: HELLO AGAIN MY POOKIE DOOKIES!! IM BACK AGAIN. bc i have nothing better to do atm and i wanted to give yall a lil sum sum before i moved away to uni. please excuse the pacing of this chapter -- this fanfic was supposed to be a oneshot and uh... now its 160 pages in google docs LMFAOOA.. things get spicy in this chapterrr! so yeah anyway, you know the drill, keep me entertained -- keep your funny little comments coming, I absolutely love reading them. You guys motivate me to keep going! Love yall

★ w.c.;4.1k

shameless ; chapter index

THE OFFICE WAS QUIET, the hum of fluorescent lights and the occasional rustling of papers the only sounds that broke the silence. You were alone, finishing up some last-minute paperwork after hours. The mission had gone surprisingly well—no casualties, a rare feat in your line of work. The team had even managed to kill a large Devil containing a piece of Gun Devil Flesh, a significant victory. Yet, instead of joining the others to celebrate, you had chosen to stay behind. Partly to avoid any awkward encounters with Himeno, but mostly because you felt restless, unable to shake off the events of the past few days.

As you finished up the last of your reports, you glanced at the new message on your phone.

HIMENO| you didn't come tonight.

Typing...

YOU

| I didn't think you'd wanna see me after the stunt I pulled.

HIMENO| I dont, but I wanted u to know that everyone is talking abt u

YOU

| ??

| wym

HIMENO

| your shadow didn't come tonight, either.

Typing...

YOU| look, himeno, ive actually been wanting to talk to you about that

| would you be able to meet up and talk it out?

HIMENO| id rather not honestly.

| ur a grown woman and i cant stop u from doing what u want

| but just know that people in pb. safety talk

| dont mess up a relationship with a perfectly good man for aki

| u should leave him for someone who can actually give him what he needs

YOU| I understand that I've hurt you, Himeno, and I'm sorry

| I have no intentions of being with Aki.

HIMENO| good

| dont get him mixed up in ur fucked up marriage

|  he doesnt deserve that.

You sighed, pocketing your phone. There were certain battles you simply couldn't win. This would undoubtedly be one of them.

It was late, and you knew you should head home. You gathered your things and made your way down the dimly lit hallways, your footsteps echoing in the emptiness.

As you passed the breakroom, you heard voices. One familiar voice, more specifically.

You slowed your pace, not wanting to intrude but curious enough to catch a snippet of the conversation. The door was slightly ajar, and you could see two figures inside.

"You look desperate, dude," the unknown person said, barely audible. "It's not attractive."

"I'm becoming ridiculous," Captain Hayakawa said, his voice low and strained. "I'm losing hope."

"Hope of what? Convincing a married woman to break her vows?" the other person retorted, a hint of incredulity in his tone.

Are they talking about me? You asked. You knew the answer. You simply did not want to confront it.

Hayakawa sighed. "I thought she would call me by now," he admitted, the vulnerability in his voice making your stomach churn uncomfortably. "I just... there was something there."

There was a pause, then the other person sighed, his voice softening. "God, you are ridiculous." After a moment, he added, almost reluctantly, "Shit, sorry, man. I know you like her."

"No, you're right," He replied, a note of resignation following his words. "She doesn't want to speak to me. I'm driving myself crazy waiting for someone who's never gonna call."

You felt a knot tighten in your stomach, guilt and confusion swirling together. You hadn't intended to eavesdrop, but now you couldn't just walk away without feeling a pang of something—regret, perhaps? The slip of paper with his number, still in your possession, weighed heavily in your mind. You had been avoiding the situation, avoiding him, and now it was clear how much it had affected him.

Aki's words echoed in your ears as you stood frozen in the hallway.

He was right; you hadn't called him. You hadn't even acknowledged the note, too caught up in your own turmoil and guilt to consider his feelings. Now, hearing him speak so openly, you felt a rush of emotions—sympathy, guilt, confusion. There had been a moment between you, an undeniable spark, but you had chosen to ignore it, to pretend it didn't exist.

When would it all come crashing down – your efforts? This whole situation?

The conversation in the breakroom continued, but you couldn't listen any longer. You turned away, your heart pounding. As you made your way to the exit, you couldn't help but replay Aki's words in your mind.

He had been waiting for you, hoping you would reach out, and now he was losing hope. Fuck.

He had been waiting for me.

The idea thrilled you, for some strange reason. Maybe because you hadn't felt desired like this in years – it made your head spin. But another part of you was terrified—of what it might mean, of the complications it would bring, of the impact on your marriage.

You couldn't help yourself. You did what you always did. You ran away from him.

You knew you couldn't avoid him forever, but for now, you needed time to think. .

7:45 PM

Typing... 

Hey. |

Typing...

Hello, |

Typing...

How are you? |

Typing...

Hey. They're taking me out for drinks tn as a sendoff party. I think you should be there.

SENT.

YOU | Hey. They're taking me out for drinks tn as a sendoff party.

I think you should be there.

| At the Sip-n-savor in downtown Tokyo

Seen 8:00 PM .

The night went on without a flaw. The atmosphere was infectious, and you had been trying to let loose, drink in hand, as you chatted and danced with the others. But as the night wore on, a sense of unease settled in. Maybe it was the drinks, maybe it was the memories of the overheard conversation in the breakroom, or maybe it was the subtle disappointment that someone hadn't shown up.

Excusing yourself, you made your way to the bathroom. The mirror reflected your flushed cheeks and slightly smudged makeup. You sighed, turning on the faucet and splashing some water on your face. As you washed your hands, you found yourself thinking about Aki.

Despite everything, a depraved part of you had hoped to see him tonight. You had been both relieved and disappointed when he hadn't shown up—relieved because it meant avoiding an awkward conversation, disappointed because you had been... well, actually looking forward to seeing him.

As you touched up your makeup, you couldn't help but reflect on your own conflicted feelings. You were married, committed, and yet, Aki had stirred something in you that you simply couldn't stand to ignore. It was confusing, disorienting. You weren't sure what you felt more strongly: guilt for being drawn to him or frustration that you couldn't just let it go.

"Ugh," You groaned, pressing your forehead against the sink. "'M g'nna be sick."

Feeling a bit lightheaded from the drinks, you decided to step outside for some fresh air. You left the bathroom and – completely drunk – maneuvered through the crowds to the nearest door.

The cool night breeze was a welcome relief against your warm skin, and you leaned against the balcony railing, taking deep breaths. The city lights twinkled below, and you watched them in a daze, trying to steady your thoughts.

That's when you saw him.

Aki was just entering the party, his sharp suit and dark hair making him stand out immediately. You felt your heart skip a beat. Then another. He was killing you.

He came, you thought, a strange mix of emotions flooding you. Relief, excitement, and that persistent undercurrent of guilt all tangled together.

He spotted you almost immediately and made his way over. As he approached, you couldn't help but think how painfully gorgeous he looked, the dim lighting casting a soft glow on his features. In that moment, he seemed almost like a knight in shining armor, a figure out of place in the lively, chaotic setting of the bar.

"Hey," he greeted, his voice smooth and warm, a balm to your nerves.

"Hey," you replied, trying to keep your voice steady despite the fluttering in your chest.

"What are you doing out here?" he asked, a slight concern in his tone. "You're not cold?"

He always seemed to be worried about you and the weather. Still, the chill felt nice against your hot skin, oddly enough.

I missed you, you didn't say. You didn't even think about it. You knew that in a day you would be back on the train and all of this would just be a bad dream, anyway.

You shook your head, a small smile playing on your lips. "No, I just needed some air. It's a bit stuffy in there."

Aki didn't respond immediately, and when you turned your head up to look at him, his expression was unreadable. The noise from inside the bar seemed distant, the world narrowing down to just the two of you in that moment. You felt a tug in your chest, a pull towards him that you couldn't explain, couldn't deny.

"Did you pregame the bar, or something?" You laughed quietly. It felt nice, being able to pretend nothing had ever happened between the two of you and just... enjoy each other's company. "You smell like beer."

"I was having a few drinks with my roommate before you texted me," He answered. Then, looking out onto the street, he added, "He told me I shouldn't come tonight. Said you're driving me crazy."

"So, why are you here, then?" You asked.

He looked at you. "I think you know why I'm here."

There was a brief silence, comfortable yet charged with the unspoken. You glanced at him, noticing the way his eyes lingered on you, soft but searching. It was the same look he had given you in the seminar, the museum, everywhere else, and it stirred something deep inside you.

You hated the way he made you feel.

"Can I buy you a drink?" He asked you. His voice was as deep and rich as ever, and you had about half a mind to take him up on the offer.

You shivered. You knew it wasn't from the cold air. It was him – the smell of him, his cologne, the distinct scent of nicotine that let you know he had just finished smoking a cigarette. It was an aroma so unique to him that you had grown to like it.

You were looking at his lips before you knew it, giving way to a craving you couldn't explain, "I'll try a cigarette, if you have any."

He smiled softly, reaching into his pocket and flipping open a carton of cigarettes and a lighter. He placed a cancer stick between your lips, and you felt a part of you die a little. He struck the wheel of the lighter, bringing the cigarette to life.

You coughed so hard that you nearly hacked up a lung. It had been years since your last cigarette.

Hayakawa stepped behind you, cupping a hand around your elbow, sliding it up your arm, your wrist, your fingers before he plucked the cigarette from your digits.

"First time?" He asked, warm voice hot against your neck.

"Wanted to give it a try," You shrugged. You didn't know what, exactly, had gotten into you. It seemed that with every sip of liquor you took lately, you crept closer and closer back to your old self. The sort of liquid courage that made people make very bad decisions. "Sorry. I'm a little," You waved your hands around yourself, trying to gesture 'drunk' without actually saying it.

"How brave of you," He murmured, pulling a hit from your cigarette and exhaling. He was the picture of sin – face flushed with alcohol, messy bangs, pink lips wrapped around a cancer stick. He was so pretty it hurt.

"I'll try it again when I'm sober," You offered.

"When?" He asked, breathing smoke out into the air. "Where?"

As persistent as always, you thought. Still, you didn't necessarily mind the attention anymore. You told yourself that it didn't matter – you would be out of here soon anyway, and everything would be far behind you before you knew it.

"Why is it that every time I'm inebriated... God tests me by throwing you in my way?" You laughed, Truly, you wished you had considered the implications of your words a little more before you had said them. "Just as I thought your manners had improved since the party. You behaved badly, then. You know that? Very badly," you hiccuped. "You should be ashamed of yourself, throwing– hic–throwing yourself at a married woman like that."

He didn't acknowledge your drunken ramblings, and he also didn't deny the fact that he had been doing exactly that – throwing himself at a married woman.

"Hardly my fault," He breathed out. "I just can't seem to resist you."

"Don't worry," You replied, eyeing him up dubiously as he pulled another hit from what was left of your cigarette. "I'm leaving tomorrow. Won't have to worry about resisting me after that."

"I know," He answered back. "Selfishly enough, I spent the last few hours wishing your train got delayed one more day, or something like that," He exhaled, then snuffed his cigarette out on the balcony, "Still, I'm glad I could see you before you went home."

"I wish I could say the same about you," You replied before you could stop the words from coming out.

He poked his tongue through the inside of his cheek, retorting, "You're gonna sit here and act like you didn't invite me? Like your eyes didn't light up like a child when you saw me pull up?" He turned around, commanding even more of your attention, standing at least a foot and a half taller than you. "You wanted me to come tonight."

It was true. That's the worst part. Everything he said was the truth.

"So that I could say goodbye," You said with remarkable finality, "I'm leaving after this."

You hadn't originally planned on leaving so soon, of course, but you wanted to get the hell out of here before you made another bad decision.

"Already?" He asked.

"You're the one who ran late," You replied. "This ends tonight. I'm going to say bye to everyone else, then I'll be gone."

With that being said, you made your way back to the door. You would go inside, bid everyone farewell, collect your belongings, and then–

He called your name before you could go back inside. You froze in place.

"Am I misreading the signals?" He asked.

You sighed, turning around one last time to clear the air, "This has to stop, Aki. You make me feel like... like I'm guilty of something."

He implored you, "What do you want me to do?"

"Go back to Himeno," You answered, a biting undertone seeping through your words. You were undeniably bitter about the whole situation, and under any other circumstances, you would have tried to be a good sport, but...

Himeno's words were a heavy weight on your heart.

'Don't mess up a relationship with a perfectly good man for Aki.'

'You should leave him for someone who can actually give him what he needs."

You could never be what Aki wanted. He wanted all of you – not just a week of you, clearly. You were married, and you couldn't let all of that go over a guy you'd been toeing the line with for what seemed like ages.

He was a young man. The fact of the matter was that you were a grown woman. A married one.

"She's a sweet, kind woman," You continued. You felt like you were going to be sick just being near him. Unknowingly, tears began to prickle at the corners of your eyes. "Go back and beg her to forgive you. Go be with someone who wants to be with you. Who can be with you."

"No," He answered simply. There was an intensity in his eyes that frightened you, like he would die without you, as he continued, "That's not what you want. I think we both know that. I refused a mission in Hiroshima to stay here with you. I planned to let go of another one in Beijing," He swallowed, "I can change my mind, and you'll never see me again."

"If you have any consideration for me," Your voice was a shuddering whisper, like someone could walk out any minute and hear the two of you going back and forth. "Any semblance– a shrivel of compassion, you'll give me back my peace."

He shook his head, "I can't. You know I can't. You've consumed every inch of my peace, every inch of my mind. How can I give you your peace?"

Fair point.

You had nothing to say to him. So, silently, your vision blurred with tears, you glared at him. Glared and frowned like that would make you believe he was the sole contributor to this issue. Then, again, you turned on your heel and went for the door. You entered the bar quickly.

He followed not too long after you, "I'll go to Beijing, then."

"No." You said. Your teary-eyed fury caught the eyes of more than a few confused bar patrons. "I don't want you to go."

Everyone was looking at you. Seriously, everyone. Your old coworkers, the bartenders, everybody.

You swallowed down your pride, bowing down before them all. "Good night, everyone," You said. You plucked your purse and your jacket off of the barstool. "Thank you for everything. I'm leaving."

Ignoring the confused looks and hushed whispers from the patrons, you exited the bar, your mind a whirlwind of emotions. The rain had started to fall, a soft drizzle quickly turning into a steady downpour. You barely noticed, too wrapped up in the turmoil inside your head. The cold, wet sensation of the rain soaked through your clothes, but you couldn't bring yourself to care. You just needed to get away, to clear your mind.

But of course, Aki followed after you. You could hear him calling your name, his voice barely audible over the sound of the rain. You quickened your pace, almost running, your heels splashing through puddles as you made your way down the block. His footsteps pounded behind you, matching your speed. You couldn't escape him, couldn't outrun him.

Finally, he caught up to you, grabbing your arm to stop you. "Wait, can we please talk?" he pleaded, his voice breathless and desperate.

You turned to face him, rain pouring down around you both. His hair was plastered to his forehead, his suit jacket soaked through. The intensity in his eyes matched the storm, a fierce determination that made your heart ache. You met his gaze begrudgingly, not wanting to deal with this, not wanting to deal with him.

"Have I really been imagining all of this?" He asked. He sounded broken. "Is it really all in my head? Tell me if it's a lie. Tell me to leave you alone. Tell me you mean it—all of it," he paused, taking a shuddering breath. "Or tell me the truth."

You swallowed hard, the weight of the situation crashing down on you. "I don't know how to feel, Aki," you finally admitted, your voice barely a whisper. "I'm trying to be good, but you just keep fucking—popping up everywhere. And you say these pretty things to me, and," You choked back a sob, struggling to find the right words. "I can't help myself around you."

"Running from your problems won't make me go away," he said, stepping forward to put his hands gently on your waist.

There was a long pause as you stood there in the rain, staring at each other. The world seemed to fade away, leaving only the two of you. The storm, the bar, everything else was just a blur. You were tired—tired of running, tired of the confusion, tired of pretending that everything was fine when it wasn't.

He added, "You can't run from your feelings."

This time, it was his eyes that dropped to your lips. His tongue darted out to dampen his own, and then his eyes flicked up to your face. When he spoke, his voice was huskier than before, as if it had been tainted by an emotion that hadn't been there before. Was it lust? Passion? Whatever it was, you wanted more of it.

Your eyes widened. Your mouth had run dry. You didn't know what to say. Even being like this right now -- as close as you were, -- was against your wedding vows. This was wrong, and you couldn't do that to your own husband.

Your own husband who loved you so dearly.

Your own husband who left you hanging so many nights on end.

Your own husband, who acted as if he couldn't care if you lived or died.

As if he had sensed your train of thought wandering, Aki placed two fingers beneath your chin, lifting your face up until he was the captor of all of your attention. Him and him alone. Not your husband, but him.

"I could treat you like a princess," His eyes wandered down to your lips again, but this time there was an unspoken hunger within them. "All you have to do is ask, and I'm yours. I already am."

And, God, what a fool you had been in uttering the words, "Don't toy with my emotions. You don't want me."

He paused, awaiting something, anything. His eyes pleaded with your own, luring you in with promises of pleasure and happiness. Gently, he grabbed your hand, placing it over his breast, right above his heart.

"I want you so badly it hurts," He breathed, "For a night, for a day, for a week..." Aki closed the gap between the two of you – brought your faces closer together. Closer, until you could feel the warmth of his calm breath fanning out against your cheek. Closer, until he uttered, "As long as you'll let me have you."

"Aki, I can't-...." You paused. Yet, still, you never moved. Your body betrayed your words, dilated pupils and trembling hands giving way to your internal dilemma. "This is wrong. You know I can't do this."

You were being a hypocrite. You knew you were. One spare glance down at the placement of your hands on his chest -- one over his breast and one looped around his tie -- and you knew he could tell you were only putting up a front.

"I know," he murmured softly, words practically dying beneath the volume of the rain, "But I can't stop thinking about you."

You folded. Your eyes dropped down to his lips one last time, and that's when you knew he had already won.

Fuck it.

"Fuck you," you muttered, feeling a surge of reckless abandon.

Without thinking, you reached out and pulled him towards you, crashing your lips against his in a desperate, frenzied kiss. It was messy and wet, your tears mixing with the rain, your hands tangling in his hair as his arms finally wrapped around you.

The kiss was filled with all the pent-up emotions, the longing, the frustration, the desire. It was passion, it was anger – it was tongue and teeth and lips smearing your lipstick over the lower half of your face. It was two black holes finally colliding after circling around each other far too long.

"I can't make sense of it. I want... you," you sighed, pulling away, voice trembling, "I don't know what any of this means anymore. I don't know what to think."

"Then don't," he whispered, his breath warm against your lips. He tasted like cigarette smoke, beer and mint gum – a flavor so utterly addicting that you couldn't seem to get enough of it. "Don't think. Let me take you back to your room."

You hesitated, the reality of the situation hitting you. This was crossing a line, a line you couldn't uncross. But as you looked into his eyes, saw the same turmoil reflected back at you, you felt your resolve crumble.

You were tired of pretending.

"Okay," you whispered, your voice barely audible over the rain. It was a final, resigned acceptance, the last nail in the coffin of your restraint.

You were tired of running from the inevitable.

a/n: dont hate me. LMFAOAOAOOAOA. i had to! i absolutely loved writing this chapter and i loved writing tipsy obsessed aki. i headcannon that he's a touchy needy bf and no one can tell me otherwise. i think you all know what happens next. im not sayin nothin tho. hehe. ANYWAYYYYY LMK WHAT YALL THOUGHTTTTT i look forward to hearing it!!! lmk what yall wanna see in the next few chapters/over the course of the story. and if youve already watched anna karenina (or read, in which case... how...) shhhhhh youve seen nothing. muah! x

credits: UNKOWN ATM. I found the cover pic on pinterest unfortch. If you know the artist, please let me know, so I can credit them properly for their work!!! This is NOT MY BEAUTIFUL DRAWINGGG. I obviously do not own csm or anything related to it. please do not reproduce, copy, or translate my works anywhere. dont fk w me im a bruja.

also: come find me on my wattpad if u wanna interact more!

taglist: @mitsuyeahhh , @sleepysnk , @enneadec , @noaabean , @em1e , @drakensdarling , @bertholdts--butt , @satanlovesusall666 , @mitsuwuyaa , @noctifule , @scaraphobia , @ask-the-insect-hashira , @lovingranchturkeyweasel , @bontensbabygirl , @slvdsjjk , @novacrystalli , @hanmastattoos , @kodzuksn , @hqtiny , @ohmaiscool15 , @redlittlequeen , @leivane , @goldeneagles-posts , @yeahblahlame , @no-oneelsebutnsu , @cookiesandcreammy , @cawwn , @the-haitani-baton , @littlelovebug98 , @armani78 , @mindurownbussines , @kokos-property , @violetmatcha , @hp-simp505 , @acethebrave , @mitsuyeahhh , @sleepysnk , @enneadec , @noaabean , @em1e , @drakensdarling , @bertholdts--butt , @satanlovesusall666 , @mitsuwuyaa , @noctifule , @scaraphobia , @ask-the-insect-hashira , @lovingranchturkeyweasel , @bontensbabygirl , @slvdsjjk , @novacrystalli , @hanmastattoos , @kodzuksn , @hqtiny , @ohmaiscool15 , @redlittlequeen , @leivane , @goldeneagles-posts , @yeahblahlame , @no-oneelsebutnsu , @cookiesandcreammy , @cawwn , @the-haitani-baton , @littlelovebug98 , @armani78 , @mindurownbussines , @kokos-property , @violetmatcha , @hp-simp505

wanna join the taglist? | shameless ; chapter index

[eddiediazismyhusband]

Okay dude, not cool. I don't appreciate being called a problem when I'm trying my best to make this work for everybody. But my point is that some people will always complain. If you are happy with the tagging, I guarantee there will be somebody else who is pissed at the same tags. And why? Because it's a grey area, especially in those fics where the love interest shifts from Tommy to Eddie.

Who is to tell at which point you should tag which ship? In your scenario it's pretty obvious I won't argue that. But that isn't always the case. So you as writer got to make a decision. Tag it Buddie and the BT stans will flip. Tag it Bucktommy and the Buddie stans get mad. There's no winning. Tag both? That might work if it's a clear 50-50 between the pairings.

And that's not even taking my intentions as the writer into consideration. I have a clear vision in my head while writing, but to get there we might need some Bucktommy. Is it enough to warrant it's own tag? It's a grey area! Hence the exhaustion.

It isn’t a grey area, anon… it quite literally is tagging the fics as they are. If BT is central to the story then tag it as such— if people don’t wanna read BT then they don’t have to read it if it’s tagged. It’s not cool to mistag fics when people already have a plethora of tags filtered out and shouldn’t still be getting shit showing up.

you just agreed that in my scenario that it was obvious- so why are you still whining in my inbox? sending me anonymous messages trying to tell me what is and isn’t “exhausting” as a fic writer when i literally am one— im literally currently writing a buddie fic rn that’s centered around marisol keeping them apart… and yknow what? its gonna be tagged as an eddiesol fic bc they are together for like half the story! and yknow what else? its gonna be tagged clearly that eddiesol isn’t endgame! so that way, if people don’t wanna read it bc they either wanna read eddiesol or bc they wanna read buddie then they can filter out the tags respectively or they can scroll past it! but what im not going to do is tag it as “minor eddiesol” and then spend over half the fic w them together because that’s not accurate tagging.

If a fic is tagged “bt”, then as a buddie stan im not gonna read it— most buddie stans ive seen getting upset about fics in this situation are mad bc of the absence of a bt tag when there should be one. That’s the crux of this issue. No one is upset about the bt tag being there in a buddie fic if bt is a central part of the story (like i literally said in my response to your previous message), we’re upset about the absence of tags/or using tags that don’t accurately describe the fic at hand.

i have never seen a “grey area” of people getting upset about something being tagged when it’s correct— everyone i’ve seen are upset over the fact that there are fics tagged as buddie, and not bt when they are clearly bt fics and vice versa.

you say that if you’re writing a buddie fic and it needs bt to get there does it warrant a tag? yes it does bc that ship is part of the story! and unless it actually plays a minor role, then don’t tag it as “minor.”

This “grey area” you’re talking about doesn’t exist in the way you are trying to paint it out. People don’t wanna click on a fic that has content that isn’t tagged, that’s not fair to the reader.

as far as my response being “not cool” for pointing something out the way i see it… you opened yourself up to be responded to the moment you sent me an anonymous message trying to make excuses for not tagging fics correctly.

please block me if you’re going to keep pushing this argument; i am not going to keep responding to you.

and if you need further proof of people disagreeing with your argument, might i suggest looking at these responses to my posts on the matter: people on both sides of the “ship war” agreeing with my point (names and pfp’s have been redacted for privacy reasons)

[the-one-who-lambs]

AO3 Questions Tag Game!

I was tagged by @bamsara (on my main @onethirdofimpossible but most of my readers follow me here for cotl stuff so I'm posting it here)

I tag @i-eat-deodorant and @megsiepoo!

Under the readmore because this is long as shit

1 – How many works do you have on AO3?

69 BAYBEEEE

2 – What’s your total AO3 word count?

213,360 words published

3 – What fandoms do you write for?

Previously: Pokemon (no longer online), Steven Universe, a few Deep-Sea Prisoner games (Wadanohara and the Great Blue Sea, The Grey Garden, Ice Scream)

Currently: Cult of the Lamb

4 – What are your top five fics by kudos?

The Care and Keeping of Eldritch Gods. Until the rewrite of RL/FG is done, this is my magnum opus

Present My first ever CotL fic. This was the first time I'd written fic in like four years and I was dusting off my writing muscles...

Smitten soft narilamb....

Cat(nip) Boy wrote this for shits and giggles in my early fandom days. The One Who Waits on catnip

How Narinder Takes His Tea First part of the old RL/FG series. Though I'm remaking it as a longform multichap fic, I'm keeping up the old series because of the memories + I don't want other people who saved the old one to lose it.

5 – Do you respond to comments?

All the time! I was able to respond to literally every single comment back in 2022, but as last year went on, I realized I probably can't realistically do that anymore. It's a blessing and a curse.

6 – What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

We already knew how this would turn out. Title not given directly in my answer in case of spoilers. My readers saw it coming because I had built up to it, but I took my time writing the gradual reveal in the last chapter to make sure it landed the way I wanted it to.

And one more comment I won't post here bc (for anyone who wants to read it) spoils the ending but shoutout to the person who physically felt the shock lurch through their body when the realization hit them after the slow build-up.

As much as I love angsty stories with happy endings, what gets me more are stories that are happy at face value, with endings that are heartwrenching because of the underbelly of what lurked beneath that facade.

7 – What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

The Risen Lamb and the Fallen God. Bit a spoilers below if you're avoiding that

The original wedding fic (as part of the original series) is up, but it's going to get a good polishing in the rewrite. Lambert and Narinder are going to have a private first dance, Thenana and Narinder are going to have a deeper conversation, Ratau's interactions with Lambert are gonna be shown rather than just told, Aym and Baal will be revived.

8 – Do you get hate on fics?

Mostly no. There was one time last year that I was compared to another writer in the fandom and slowly asks evolved into "your own concepts are being done better by others" and shit, and the other writer got hate messages as well, and... well, it was a whole thing. Don't wanna talk too in detail about it because I don't wanna beat a dead horse but cotl writers have unionized so we got the last laugh I guess

9 – Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

lol ya it's on remainderofreality. What "kind?" uh. experimental because I'd never tried the genre before this fandom and it kinda shows but that's okay.

10 – Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Honestly, I'm not really into crossovers! Unless it's Webber in cotl. He can stay, he's cute.

11 – Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Yeah. It was actually the first fic I posted online, ever. In middle school, I wrote a whole ~100k-ish word self-insert pokemon fanfic, which I wrote by hand in like five composition notebooks, so I never posted that online. But after that I decided to post shorter one-shots for pokemon online, and a few months later I found one of mine reposted without credit. Plagiarized entirely, basically. It scared me and I deleted everything I had posted online, and I don't have extra copies of the works now. :(

12 – Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope, but I'd be okay with it if I was asked beforehand and proper credit was given!

13 – Have you ever co-written a fic?

Yeah! Of Duty and Devotion is basically a glorified roleplay between me as Aym, @i-eat-deodorant as Baal, @checkplzjuliet as The Lamb, and @surfdudeboy as Narinder. I also wrote Hide and Seek, a cute little Bishop family one-shot, with @lordiedams (hi Damien I miss you).

14 – What’s your all-time favorite ship?

Narilamb. I haven't focused on a ship for this long, except maybe Rupphire back in the day, but I'm fixated so much more on CotL than I was for SU.

15 – What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Honestly, Of Duty and Devotion lmao. I'm much more focused on my own projects and so are Pavi, Surf, and Juliet. I do want to finish it though.

16 – What are your writing strengths?

Pacing, diction, syntax, getting the intended point across and doing it well. Once I commit to doing something, I don't usually let myself "give up" on it, hence why I barely have any unfinished WIPs. That's a skill honed with tons of practice, though. I have massive ADHD, and I'm bad at finishing things, but when it comes to writing by god I'm gonna do it.

17 – What are your writing weaknesses?

I often struggle to get to a point where I'm totally focused in on what I'm writing. It does happen once or twice a month, but honestly, I'm usually so busy with life stuff that I don't get to do that most of the time! I wish I had more time to make room for my hobbies, but alas. At least summer is coming up, and I'll be able to do that more often, hopefully!

18 – Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

It's possible to do it naturally for sure, but I rarely see it done well in fic. I've never attempted it...... or, wait, have I? I guess Thenana's sign language counts, huh? ...I feel like I need to do more research about this topic to answer the question properly.

19 – First fandom you wrote for?

Pokemon <3

20 – Favorite fic you’ve written?

The Risen Lamb and the Fallen God or The Care and Keeping of Eldritch Gods.

Risen/Fallen (and the enemies-to-lovers narilamb dynamic) was like the first thing that I did to make a "mark" on this fandom, and I didn't expect it to inspire so many people for sure! But, the first iteration of the series was so rushed. I wrote the whole thing in just over three weeks and averaged one chapter published every day and a half. Now that I have a better grasp on the characters after playing with them for a long while, I get to see my improvement, and I get to see so many friends I've made along the way sticking with me, the revamped "director's cut" version is definitely on track to be my favorite work.

However. It has yet to surpass Care and Keeping. As the oldest of four kids in my family, I based so much of Shamura on my experiences as an eldest sibling, and many of the experiences the younger bishops had in their formative years on our own childhoods. I based Narinder's childhood off of brother #1's (brother who is two years younger than me), Kallamar's childhood on my own, Heket's childhood on my sister's (five years younger than me), and Leshy's off of my youngest brother's (ten years younger than me). This story wasn't just an exploration of the Bishops and their dynamic/relationship pre-canon, it's also a testament to my own love as an eldest sibling... and all the anxiety associated with that, too.

Thanks for tagging me! Back to working on my presentation...

[tumblermakesapodcast]

tumblrmakesapodcast FAQs

How does it... y'know, work? Every Tuesday, a poll goes up, and you've got a week to get your vote in (and to convince your friends to vote for your fave)! Eventually, these polls will be pooled together, and drafts of the show will begin to go up, starting January 2025. After that, we'll cast, record, and produce the show, and the first episode will drop November 5, 2025. Here's a link to our pinned post, which has the timeline and some other fun things :)

Wait, wait, wait, who's actually doing the writing? That would be me (Len/Blank)! You're gonna have to blindly trust for a little bit, since I don't have a publicly accessible profile that I feel safe sharing on good ol' tumblr dot com, BUT i am in the process of finishing my theatre degree, where my specific focus is playwriting, so. do with that information what you will

Did you know that #tmap is also used by The Magnus Protocol? I did! It's a little silly to me that I keep getting asked this, esp since tma was/is such a popular show and i would be surprised if people in the audio drama community didn't at least have a passing familiarity with the show's name. (that's not a dig at anyone who's asked this, i just chuckle a little when i see an ask like this in my inbox) I've seen more people tag Protocol stuff with #tmagp more often than #tmap, though, so it's hard to feel like I'm stepping on any toes by using #tmap for Tumblr Makes A Podcast.

Once we've written a bit more of the show, the Odette Library storyline will be given a name and tag that reflects it. For now, we just gotta share <3

Where can I listen? Well, the show's not out yet, but when it is, it'll be found wherever you get your podcasts ;) Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Here on Tumblr, third platform, and wherever else you get your podcasts.

Can I audition to be in the show? Yes! There will be an open casting call put out in May 2025, and I'll have more details on that front as we get closer to then.

Can I help work on the show? I can't guarantee anything, but DM me with what you wanna do and we can hash it out ;) (if i suddenly go radio silent, its bc i read the message and then responded in my head but not irl, please poke me and i'll get back to you!!!)

[seiwas]

hi sel! can I request 21 and 24 for the ask game? super curious because my other favorite part of your writing is seeing people go feral in the notes lol

iris!!! thank you for sending in 🥹

send me a number from this end of the year fanfic writer ask game!!

#21. most memorable comment/review

omg 🥺 YOUR favourite part of MY writing is seeing the notes??? 😭😭 i am gonna hug you PLS

i think i have been so extremely blessed with such generous readers 🥺 i reblog every memorable comment/review with the tag #shotorus.feedback if you would like to peruse!!! 🥹 but hmm... i'll put this under the cut bc for sure it's going to be long!!

#24. favorite some memorable fics you read this year

i answered this here! but 😼 this just gives me a reason to give ANOTHER set of fics hehehehe 😋 beware!!!! this'll be 15 total recs hehe

and!!! like i mentioned, i have a lot in my tbr so there are a lot i probs haven't gotten to yet + the fics i reblog are more or less ones i recommend anyway!!! 🥹 (will also put this under the cut)

for #21.

niku's and sera's reblogs on 'do you believe in love?' really tickle a spot in my heart!!

niku's because back then, col wasn't even a thing yet!! 'do you believe in love?' was just a silly little one-shot born from me thinking about whether gojo believes in love. in a way, this rlly inspired me to take the story further!! and so col was born 🥺 so really, col is all thanks to @stellamancer 🥺

sera's because sera's gojo is one of my absolute favourites and i've been reading her stuff since way way waaaay before i even started writing!! she's also one of my first moots, and is such an inspiration to me when it comes to writing 🥺 so seeing her comment on this lil fic of mine rlly made me feel so 🥹🥹🥹

midi's reblogs are always hilarious and she takes apart my fics like she's deboning a fish 😭😭 (this is how we became friends!!! i messaged her to thank her for her tags on my earlier works and it was even in her native language ashfbas so i google translated it to understand 😭)

ari's reblog on 'tell me about love (show me how)' had me sobbing last night omg 😭 i swear we're writing NOVELS for each other atp

+ a writer i really love and admire commented so many nice things on my megumi fic the other day, i'm still not over it (i won't link them here bc i don't wanna be exposed LOL)

but!! i am truly!! so thankful for each tag/comment i receive 🥺 i think it's so nice that people are not only taking the time to read, but also taking the time to write smth about how they feel or what they think 🥺

for #24.

hq!!

stoplights by hajimio (iwaizumi hajime x reader) [1k. established relationship.] i think about this fic all the time and remember so vividly how i felt the first time i read it.

no matter what by shibaraki (miya atsumu x reader) [1k. established relationship hurt/comfort.] teared up a little reading this 🥹 clutched my chest too.

a piece of you with me by heich0e (kageyama tobio x reader) [1k. established relationship.] this was the cutest thing and i love how op writes tobio.

jjk

dancing with your ghost by wanderwithme (nanami kento x reader) [9k. kind of exes to lovers.] the concept is so good and so creative. executed so beautifully and achingly.

cantor's paradox by hawnks (gojo satoru x reader) [3k. ambiguous relationship.] one of my favourite gojo fics ever; i reread this all the time.

dawn instinct by lorelune (gojo satoru x reader) [6k. ambiguous relationship.] so tender and raw. really beautiful 🥺

i could fall asleep or stare in your eyes (you’re right by my side) by seoafin (gojo satoru x reader) [2k. ambiguous relationship.] the dialogue hits heavy and there's so much in the unsaid (i am crying).

in between by threadbaresweater (fushiguro megumi x reader) [3k. friends with benefits.] so tender and raw (2). there's such an ache and i love how megumi was portrayed.

the king is but a man by petrichorium (gojo satoru x reader) [series. usurper!gojo] one of my favourite gojo series!

cruel summer by seravphs (gojo satoru x reader) [collection. friends to lovers.] explores dynamics with other characters so wonderfully and really does give off that 'last summer with friends' feeling

bnha

carve it into the soil, carve it into me by gardenofnoah (todoroki shouto x reader) [series. gardener!reader.] puts shouto under a microscope and i love that. so beautifully written.

couldn't utter my love when it counted by c4ssiopeias (bakugo katsuki x reader) [5k. exes to lovers.] so vulnerable and so raw. cried reading this.

it takes a strong hand, and a sound mind by gardenofnoah (bakugo katsuki x reader) [5k. friends to strangers to lovers.] the pacing is beautiful and the there's smth abt it that's just so tender 🥺

on my way (to you) by ofmermaids (bakugo katsuki x reader) [12k. strangers to lovers.] one of my favourite bakugo pieces; i think about it all the time and is such a creative concept executed perfectly too.

you feel like home (you're like a dream come true) by willowser (bakugo katsuki x reader) [3k. ambiguous relationship.] the dialogue is everything omg. i ached so much at this!!!

[platypusplayhere]

Thank you @dangerliesbeforeyou for tagging me, im mentioning all kinds of media bc I love to rant, I have a lot of love in my heart and I have trouble choosing just 8: (im making this on mobile hope it's readable).

Howl's moving castle (2004)

My first experience of gender envy, gender fascination, gender emulation for Howl, at a time I didn't even know that gender was a thing because I was like idek 7 years old.

Kiss of the rabbit god (2019)

A short movie, stumbled onto it bc of Tumblr. You honour, I simply love it.

Shrek (2001)

I'm not being ironic I'm very serious about this one. My mom used to braid my hair weekly when I was little and I constantly played this one, I know it by heart and I'm not joking. I freaking love this movie. Same goes for Mulan, Beauty and the beast, Charlie and the chocolate factory, and the whole Shrek franchise up to the 3rd one. (Gotta watch Puss in boots 1 and 2 tho.)

V for vendetta (2005)

This is a shout-out to 14 years old me who might have at some point based their personality around this movie or maybe they didn't, who's to say. I'm not sorry. Kinda still like it tho.

Corpse bride (2005)

There is an independent cinema in my hometown and they did run it often over the years. Bestie I don't know how many times I went to see this movie with my mother as a child. Recently learned about the Jewish origins of this myth and im a lil upset about the stolen storyline without the context. But some will say it's a Burton movie and they're right.

Valentine's day (2011)

First movie I went to see alone with my friends, I was like 12yo. Rewatched it again like 2 years ago, yeah it ain't that great but it's the memories right.

Father and soldiers (2022)

The last movie that made me cry. I hate war movies but my friends convinced me to go because it was less than 2 hours and I've been mad at movies being more than two and a half hours lately (looking at u House of Gucci, Doctor Strange 2) yeah, I cried my eyes out. It's not a perfect movie but the message is great and very moving. I don't like the English title because the original/French title directly refers the name of a group of African soldier recruited by France in its colonies during WWI -> "Les Tirailleurs" (if I remember well, the soldiers were recruited in every colonies but they left Africa from the Senegal and so all these soldiers are referred as Senegalese regardless of their actual origins). The English title is more fitting thematically wise I'll give you that.

Fulmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood (2009)

Knew about it, was recommended by a dear mutual of mine on this very hellsite and yeah, ppl keep saying it's good because it just is.

I told sunset about you/ I promised you the moon (2020-2021)

If you read my tags u know how I rant about this show often. Watched it 2 years ago thanks to someone i follow on Tumblr (but im not really sure who it was anyway if you're a mutual thank you sm). My first foray into BL (back when I didn't even know what it was) and I couldn't be happier that I started with this. I don't have enough words to praise it. (currently writing a post about it tho, stay tuned for whenever I get around to finish it (tell me if u wanna know when it's up), big up to Bad Buddy and To My Star too)

Honoured mentions bc I started making a list and had more than 8 and couldn't not mention them:

Other movies: O'brother, Love and Leashes, God's own country, Jackie Brown, The big lebowsky (idek if I like this movie but I needed something to base my personality around when I was 15yo)

The book The Hunchback of Notre-Dame by Victor Hugo, I'm gonna keep my rant about how the English title is a misunderstanding of the book locked and not even start it.

Alice isn't dead and The Magnus archives (although they're podcasts and I haven't quite finished them, the first seasons are exquisite)

Welcome to Night Vale, I have a lot of episodes to catch up on (currently working on that) started listening like in 2016 then stopped around idek 2 years ago. Some of these episodes are masterpieces ( some I know by heart: Guidelines for disposal, Love is a shambling thing, What happened at the Smithwick House, If he had lived, and The Pilot ofc)

the ballet Swan Lake (1995, 2012) by Matthew Bourne. I don't have enough words. I'll just say it's on youtube.

.....and many more im not think abt rn

*acts surprised* this became a real long post, real quick

(That's why I take a lot of time to answer those lmao, shout out and thank you to the ppl who tag me in these and then I take a lot of time to answer)

Tagging these people and anyone who wants to do it can mention me: @sherlockig @dontbesoevil @lordmeowdemort @namelessbeing @hairbackc0llarup @comrademichael @johnlockdynamic @lovelywickedsoul @frenchsiren

[explorevenus]

Hiiii! I was out all day so I didn't get to drop in and respond to 🫧, nor did I get the chance to ask my silly littol questions that I'm always stacking up on 💀 (every time I don't have the time to send an ask, I write down my questions in my notes and ask when I can 😭) so I def wanna get to that soon, BUT! Before I do, I wanted to check in on you and make sure you were okay :(

I saw that you and tea made posts explaining yourselves in regards to some angry anons and it made me so upset. Like,, it's literal fiction 😭 it's not that srs. the fact that you two had to even make those posts to break things down for them is insane, like- Yall are taking things way too literal, of COURSE kidnapping is bad. Of COURSE stalking is bad. nobody said it was something that was condoned- it's literally for a fictional story because the plot is based around said dark topics, like?? 😭 kinda the point- idk I just felt the need to jump at your guys' aid bc it just upset me that you guys had to even explain yourselves ☹️ they shouldn't be interacting with things that they aren't comfortable with- the tags are RIGHT there. And also?? Idk like- if yall are mad about these fics, then keep that same energy with literally every dark media ever produced, like???? be so srs rn.

Like it's fine if yall don't wanna read stuff like this, nobody is forcing you- it's not everybody's cup of tea, I get that. but don't spew hate just bc you personally can't bring yourself to read it??

You don't have to post this if you don't want to, honey! Especially if you want some time away from this topic, no worries! I will understand <33 Just wanted to send some love your way because I can understand how frustrating or possibly even scary/discouraging it is to receive stuff like that- but your anons love you and we have your back! So please please continue to do ur thing, bb 🫶🏻🫶🏻 WE LOVE YOUR CONTENT RAAAAHHHHH 🗣🗣🗣🗣🗣

(This also goes out to dollrxst and nexyswrites if they see this <33 started with venus' yandere fic and expanded to you two HAHA) (+ but again, if you don't wanna post, don't be shy to share my message with them 🫡!!)

bottom line, don't let these bum ass bozos get to yall grrrrrr, your anon bbs got you 🫶🏻🫶🏻

MWAH TAKE IT EASY, MY LOVES!! 🩷🩷

- 🐕

okay first of all dog anon you're the best and i love you ;w; cc'ing @dollrxst and @nexyswrites just in case they need some words of encouragement <3

secondly i am perfectly fine, thank you for checking in <3 people are gonna do what they're gonna do and that includes taking fanfiction way too seriously lmfao. it's unfortunate and a bit annoying but ultimately it doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things, i've done my due diligence in tagging my shit and putting proper warnings on everything so if people wanna get upset about what i write, that's their prerogative lol

thanks for sticking around and checkin in and being supportive and sweet <3

[rollercoasterwords]

Regarding recommendations of your fic, are you more comfortable with people not ‘advertising’ it on tiktok and such? I know that the comments people make on there can be pretty intense. My point of asking this is, where is the line for you about how much you want your fic talked about outside of tumblr? I think we’ve all seen it before, fics blowing up online is a double edged sword, so I understand you wanting to keep in ‘contained’. I just love to gush about my current favorite reads, but I also don’t want to cause you any trouble.

okay i feel like this answer is gonna get long lol but. yeah generally speaking tldr is i'm not really comfortable w people posting abt my hp fics on tiktok anymore

and like. i don't wanna come off as like...ungrateful ig. like it does make me happy when people like my fics enough to recommend them + i appreciate the kind words + love etc but!! honestly if someone is wanting to let me know that they appreciate my writing the best way to do so is by commenting or sending me a message here, bc im not gonna see any tiktoks unless i go searching for them. and while i appreciate people reccing my fics i also like. have no desire for any sort of 'advertising' like i appreciate recs to the extent that they're someone telling me 'hey i loved ur writing!' i don't like. have a desire to grow an 'audience' or whatever so! that is not something i am asking anybody to help me do and if someone does decide to try and make my fics more popular i'm not really gonna be grateful bc like...i didn't ask for that lol.

and the two big reasons i'm specifically wary about tiktok are:

1. every time i have seen a fic go viral/gain popularity on tiktok there has been a simultaneous influx of hate, entitlement, and just general fuckery that has made the fic writer's life worse. so in this case, specifically with atwmd, i am 100% sure that if it did gain popularity via tiktok that i would get an influx of hate, especially bc it's like. a complex story with very fucked up characters lol. i mean just look at the people who take up arms bc atyd wolfstar is 'toxic' or whatever...i do not want 2 see what would happen if that crowd read my wolfstar in atwmd lmao

2. i have very mixed feelings abt writing hp fic in the first place and am trying to limit my personal contribution to hp's popularity. like. with ao3 people aren't going to be stumbling across hp fic unless they're already seeking it out; tumblr is, for the most part, a similar type of self-curated space where my hp fic pretty much remains limited to what are already hp-fic reading circles.

but bc of tiktok's algorithm, my fic could end up on the fyp's of people who aren't really interested in hp and pique their interest, drawing in new people to start engaging w hp fandom who otherwise wouldn't. and i don't really like the idea of that happening! i don't want the fic i'm writing to contribute to like. growing hp's popularity. i'd rather keep it in circles of people who are already choosing to engage w this content, rather than have it float into the lives of people who might otherwise not see it.

i also feel like. on ao3 anyone finding the fic is gonna be someone searching for like. those specific tags--someone who wants to read a story like the one i'm writing. on tumblr, the only people really hearing abt it r people who follow me + so have like....seen me talking abt the fic + are basically knowing what to expect. on tiktok, any posts tagged like #marauders or whatever could end up crossing paths w a bunch of people who specifically would not read this type of fic, and i do not want those people to read it and then get upset with me when the story isn't what they wanted (something else that i have seen happen to other writers). so that's kinda what i mean by the 'breaking containment' thing

anyway. i don't have any issue w people reccing my fics to like their friends or closed discord servers or whatever--spaces where like. u know the people ur reccing it to are people who would like the fic + not treat it like a product for consumption etc. and as stated previously i appreciate those sorts of recommendations bc it does mean a lot 2 me when someone likes my writing enough to want 2 share it!! there are just specific pitfalls w tiktok that i have grown uncomfortable w to the point that now anytime someone mentions seeing my fic over there and i go search up the vid, even if it's super sweet and has like lovely comments that make me smile and literally nothing negative i still get a kick of anxiety at the thought of who might see this video or what might happen if it goes viral.

i've accepted at this point that i can't control how people are going to respond to my writing once i've posted it on the internet; all i can do is say 'please don't do x with my fics' and hope people listen. but i'm not gonna like get mad at people for posting on tiktok or whatever bc obviously not everyone is gonna see this post or read my faq, and i don't want to send any hate towards people who are posting tiktoks abt my fics--like i don't need anyone defending me or whatever. usually those vids are just out of sight out of mind 4 me. but!! since u have taken the time 2 kindly ask (ty btw) this is like. the very long answer abt where i currently stand on tiktok lol

[prettyboy-like-you]

ANSWER SOME QUESTIONS

...then tag some folx you wanna know better!

.

thanks for my tag, @fawcett-hairspray-club! i'm definitely gonna be bombarding you with more questions about a few of your answers!

.

3 SHIPS: the toppest of trios, for me, is destiel, sterek and harringrove. in that order! (honorary mention to pynch and geraskier both of which almost tie with the latter).

FIRST SHIP: oooh i reckon it must be fox and dana from the x files *alexa play mulder & scully by catatonia* or actually maybe it's fox and sunflower seeds...

CURRENTLY CONSUMING: too much coffee, lots of water, and my sterek spotify playlist bc the biles × sourwolf brainrot is extremely strong rn. oh, and some new german words: aufregend! #duolingo

LAST MOVIE: the outfit (2022) by graham moore. it's sort of a mobster movie but not really and feels kind of like a play? it stars the excellent mark rylance, along with zoe deutsch and dylan o'brien. i enjoyed all of them and it very much.

LAST SONG: i know the shape by german error message.

CURRENTLY WATCHING: s4 of servant

CURRENTLY READING: just about to start how to be autistic by the wonderful poe and i'm also up to ch.6 of madi's brilliant sterek WIP fic light a spark.

CURRENTLY CRAVING: food, anything at all—at present i have nothing containing any real sustainance in the flat because i'm a tremendous failhuman xp

.

BTW it's @all-or-nothing-baby / @teencopandthesourwolf / @anoiseofgloriousdisdain in case you're wondering who tf i am! waaaay too many sideblobs lol.

tagging, play or nay:

@munsonboy @raisesomehale @jimmypricegf @thisgirlsays22 @catboynecromancy @seanchaidh7 @harrgrove @lovebillyhargrove @sketchyspirit @ghosthan @shealynn88 @sharkfish @novemberhush @demonlandline @greyhavenisback @witchsickness and anybody i could have tagged/anyone at all who sees this and wants to join in :)

[atinylittlepain]

Apothecary's last chapt was so good! I totally get Joel, I don't have patience for slow - poor horny baby, btw 🤣🤣

One thing that gets me angry it's how hypocrite Jackson people are! It's the fucking END of the world and they still have time to bully someone they consider a witch?? They have time to bother about witchcraft! Those fuckers, they could try building useful stuff to improve their community!!! Bit they care more about to hurt a woman who's different (that also has powers but they're not sure about this).

Anyway, I can't wait for the next chapter! Joel is being so loving with her, I wanna see they working the things out 🤞🏻

Also, can I ask to be tagged to Hayloft too? And your new story with Dio coming, as well 👀

Pretty please? I'm in love with your stories 🥰

thank you for reading and loving on apothecary, babe!

the people of jackson can be mega assholes i'm not gonna lie to you - i think that they are so awful toward her because they feel very protective over their little piece of safety in the world, and anything that might challenge that, that might be different, just freaks them out... we'll have to see if they're able to stop being such ding dongs moving forward!

i'm currently not doing a taglist for hayloft bc i'm giving her a break rn, but i'm happy to tag you on the Dio fic!!

thank you thank you for your kind message <3

[straighttohellbuddy]

HELLO SO THAT FIC U POSTED???? CHANGED ME FOREVER. I relate to that other anon deeply my brain chemistry will never be the same. it frankly hasn't been the same since the fic was just snippets you posted abt once in a while and now it's posted and it's A 25K DELIGHT AND I JUST---- *SCREAMS**SQUEALS**CRIES*

I CANNOT STRESS ENOUGH HOW PRESENT IT'S BEEN IN MY MIND SINCE FOREVER KQMCLWKFS I'm dying. reader is great her thing with Wilbur is great I am screaming and crying and Oh My God thank u for sharing it w us I am. /SCREAMING./

no but genuinely I've been grinning and letting out like. fickin SQUEALS for over an hour kqmflsjxkalck like I'm so glad and happy I got to read it istg. u have SUCH a way with words?????? and characterisation??????? and like. developing relationships hello????????? I am in shambles. every once in a while I return to ur writing bc it's just So Good and now I got to do it thru this fic I've been excited for for the last????? TWO YEARS I THINK. idk how long it's been but it's been A WHILE so thank u thank u thank u thank u not only did it live up to my expectations it also absolutely went over them. thank u genuinely you've made my past two years pretty much. for the last however long there hasn't been a week in which I haven't thought abt reader and Q's interaction (the snippet of ‘this is how it started the last time’) for at least an hour straight genuinely like. and haVING CONTEXT??????

anyway basically this is like a huge thing for me and I just thought I'd tell u that😭💕 like I hope u know your writing has been v important to me for a while, from what you love you devour to like. everything kinda but wylyd just struck a chord w me if that makes sense lmao and like. I would've totally gotten it if you'd lost interest but I'm glad u didn't and decided to share that absolutely amazing fic💕💕

(*25K*!!!! oh my god!!!!! I wasn't before either, but now I will literally never stop thinking abt it)

((THE GHOSTBUR STUFF WAS SO SWEET)) ((and heartbreaking in the most PERFECT manner)) ((and don't get me STARTED on Dream. and Q. and WILBUR OH MY GOD WILBUR WILBUR WILBUR WILBUR-------))))))(and reader oh my god reader I will never shut up about reader)

I'm gonna rotate your message in my head like a microwave dish for the rest of my life I love you so much 💖💖💖 I've been meaning to answer this for days but I wanted to take the time to properly answer it because I'm going to ramble about this fuckin fic I hope you know!!

this fic means so so much to me and I'm so glad that I finally got it published, but also that I ended up publishing it like this, like I definitely could have added more but I think it would have ended up kind of bloated, and it's already such a huge fic 😅😅 the vignette style makes me feel like I'm getting snapshots of the important moments while still getting the sense of the reader having a life between scenes, and the rest of the dsmp plot still going on around them

I mean this so genuinely, WIPS are always In Progress, I never forget a fic, I still reread what I have of my Mafia!Corpse AU from 2019 and wonder what I should add next, same with the other like, 20 drafts I have. 😅😅 I hope they all get published eventually, but I feel very lucky to have come back to this and recognise that it's good enough to put out there ☺️☺️

but OKAY I WANNA TALK ABOUT THE READER'S RELATIONSHIPS WITH ALL THESE FUCKING CHARACTERS BECAUSE THEY MAKE ME YELL !! im making this into it's own post because i literally wrote so much just talking about the reader and dream and i have so much to say about them and Q and WILBUR and i'll tag u xx i LOVE YOU SO MUCH AND I LOVE THIS FIC IT STILL MAKES ME FERAL

[misqnon]

hi, i just read all of ur posts tagged as misqnon's one piece liveblogging and it was so much fun T-T. im here to rant about one piece and im sorry.

i really love seeing people react to content i am caught up with and hold close to my heart.

i got into the 800s in the anime and stopped watching, took a break and then read the manga up to around 1060. but last month i decided to read the whole thing from the beginning and it is genuinely SO WORTH IT.

after u have caught up completely its super rewarding to go back and look at previous chapters bc its constant "oh my god look what was foreshadowed here??" and "now i understand the context behind this!!!" and "this interaction is so much more meaningful now that i know their relationship!!". yes it did take me a whole month of nearly nonstop reading to catch back up but i have 0 regrets.

wano and the arc after it are both super fun and interesting and i think ur gonna love it. the lore is crazy. i hope u dont see any spoilers bc going into it completely blind will probably be way more exciting, especially with the most recent arc since its kinda suspenseful and mysterious,,.

anyways thats all i have to say how do you end these things.. take care!!

AAAAA ANON THIS IS SUCH A FUN MESSAGE TO RECIEVE THANK YOU...

I ended up talking a lot so I'll put this under a cut lol

I used to be the person who said I would never watch one piece 😭😭 I've been into anime since I was like 12 and I'm almost 24 now (fuck . That's like half my life) and obviously it's always been on my radar but I always thought it was 1. Too popular 2. Too Long 3. Hated how oda draws women lmao so I was fine ignoring it and only knowing the basics from just Being On The Internet

I think sometime early on I caved and attempted to watch it- I got to alabasta and stopped bc the anime pacing wasn't doing it for me (though I liked it up until then, but didn't LOVE it)

cut to high-school where a couple of my good friends liked it but we never really talked about it, it was a lifelong interest for one of them bc he'd started reading it on like 4th grade

Well I'm still friends with them (shoutout to sam and seb) and they convinced me to watch one piece film red with them in like July or August of last year bc they were showing me the songs and I, ado fan bc I'm a retired weaboo and a vocaloid Stan, was like "haha that sounds like ado" and they went "IT IS!!!!??" so I had to watch it for her.

again, I was like oh this is fun I like this :^) but no IMMEDIATE interest, more of a passive thing... until the live action came out a month or so later and I watched it just because and DAMN I FELL IN LOVE FAST

I went back to the anime and rewatched the beginning, then skipped back to alabasta where I had left off years and years ago and now I'm Here 🧍

I watched up through part of dressrosa before I started reading the manga, and now I'm doing that while watching certain episodes of just the parts I really wanna see animated

It's been. So Fun

I am now that person who's like Hey You Should Watch One Piece. I get it now. I so get it lmao. And you know the weirdest part is that with it being divided up into arcs like it is I find myself thinking it really doesn't feel that long!?!? Am I insane,

anyways. It's been a while since I was in an active fandom or even in a fandom at all - ESPECIALLY such a big one!?! (I was in college for 4 years and Busy).

but it's. Crazy. I'm writing fanfics and joining discord servers and I've never done that before. it's been very fun and rewarding tbh...I don't like a lot of things about oda and aspects he included and ofc one piece isn't perfect or unproblematic but it IS a really awesome epic of a story about friendship and found family and anti authority and its just.

I'm also a person who's always loved reaction videos or just even seeing otherppl react to things I like so I RELATE AND IM SO GLAD I CAN BE THAT FOR U...

I'm ngl as I've been reading I've been wanting to look up some old one piece forums dated the time certain reveals happened bc I want to see how people felt as this shit came out holy Shit....

it's additionally funny bc this blog is about 10 years old and has amassed a decent amount of followers over the years who were just into some of the other random stuff I've been into but I know a fair amount of them were thinking we were on the same page of not being into one piece and now here I am. Ruining that. And with the pervert character as my favorite no less. lmao SORRYYYY YALL <3

I'll leave u with this message I sent into the discord I share with some friends the other day, none of which really watch op, when asked to explain something about the show. In fact, I think the reasoning for this message was BECAUSE I was explaining to a friend just how much oda foreshadows things!! jinbei, kaido, haki, sanjis backstory, ALL being mentioned by name or referenced DECADES/YEARS BEFORE APPEARING ON SCREEN...HUNDREDS OF CHAPTERS APART....I could rant on more but I'll stop for now.

thank u for the message and feel free to dm me to talk about this silly show anytime bc its sunken its claws into me 😭

[husbandhoshi]

OK HI . im ready .

what i like most about your writing - i have . so many things but one of my top fav things about your writing is your prose!!!! you have such a magical way of stringing words together every time im reading your fic im TAKING NOTES im filing them away in my little mental cabinet for future use!! every time i read your writing i'm like man! i wanna write like lily!! and also its not Just the prose like i love how you Know how to evoke emotion in your fic & you know how to perfectly phrase your sentences so it makes the reader feel!! this goes for both when the fic needs to be funny (EPL) or when it's meant to be sad and moody and Yearning ,,,, And you know how i love a good yearning that hurts my feelings! i don't even have to mention how you're good at evoking the horny . that's like your brand [thumbs up emoji]

a fic i'm excited for you posting - i'm looking at you with big sad wet cat eyes ....... fwb hyuck .......... excited to see how he's gonna be cooked up and plated ....... Personally i've Been ready to dig in .

if i've ever shared/talked about your fic to someone else - HAVE I!!!!! i'm like a lily husbandhoshi missionary atp . cece can attest ....people ask me for good fic and i slide your account across the table like Have you heard of the good word of Lily Husbandhoshi .?

a fic i didn't expect to like so much - that one jeonghan timestamp with the hwaseong moon 😭 i think i said in the tags but i don't think about jeonghan like that he's just some guy to me but the way you wrote him was soooo good like . like i was so shocked i came out of that fic staring blankly at the ceiling... FOR YOON JEONGHAN ?! don't get me wrong he's still just some guy to me but when i reread that fic . momentarily he stops being just some guy and turns into A guy .....

good luck on your exam on friday <3 I LOVE U!

like very RARELY am i without words but.......huu...... this is truly like the highest of praise i am nawt even joking..... to have YOU see ME thru my writing is crazy. and it's also funny because i will catch myself writing something and idk if it makes any sense but my brain will tell me "oh! cat will get it." idk we r rlly on the same brainwave!!!!

and STOPPPPPPP the fwb hyuck wip eats at me sooo bad bc the like 5 paragraphs i have are soooo good but i cannot come up w the juice for the rest of it....... also for some reason whenever i open my writing app it opens to the hyuck fic so im forced to reconcile with my writers block 💀

u liking the hwaseong moon jeonghan one is crazy bc i spun that one around in my brain for sooo long and i think i eventually wrote most of it on a treadmill in like an hour. i think my fave part of that is still one of the first lines i sent you (the one w the text messages...)

and THANK U . for the well wishes and support and everything <3 u already know this but i love u so dearly!!