#just noticed ​the sea is animated in the background the WHOLE time

[insomniac-dormouse]

I fucking love Bluey

Bluey Season 1 episode 26 | The Beach

[2-dsimp]

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Yandere hitman squad

Introducing the Boss

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Yandere Boss who’s known as a lazy sleezebag that makes the squad carry more weight than needed. He can never be bothered to do anything that he deems as tiresome and is often just chilling in the background. However, when it comes time to flip his ON switch that’s when he truly starts making boss moves.

Yandere Boss is a closeted Otaku of anime. Having shelves upon shelves of figurines, mangas, and unopened collector items. As well as walls covered in iconic wall tapestries of his favorite characters. Along with a secret closet filled with cosplay costumes that’s yet to be touched.

Yandere Boss that happens to go to AnimeCon one day in a shady disguise silently admiring the authentic cosplays and merch. Until something caught his eye which was you in the most glamorous mouth watering homemade cosplay that left him gasping for breath and leaning up against the wall as he tried to calm his pounding heart from how fantastic you looked.

Yandere Boss who immediately became a fan. Lacking the drive to part the Red Sea of cosplayers flocking to you like a bunch of fruit flies he settled for admiring you from afar following your every move from a short distance as he began snapping photo after photo, and even taking videos of his newfound cosplayer crush that he’s becoming absolutely obsessed with like it was love at first sight.

Yandere Boss who gripped his phone screen so tightly that it cracked from him spotting two losers harassing you now that you were in a somewhat secluded area. With a long drawn out raspy sigh he retreated from the wall’s corner and came out the shadows behind you.

Yandere Boss that tentatively slithered his lean arm around your shoulder towering over you with his tall lanky frame. Peering down at the two creeps with a deadpanned expression like they were nothing but sad insects as he taunted them with an disgusted sneer. Insulting the two harassers, his sharp tongue automatically cursing them out calling them gross dickless losers and disgraces to the anime community all in one. While flipping them a slender manicured middle finger painted black as he told them to fuck off since you were taken by him.

Yandere Boss who purposely made a whole scene causing everybody to collectively to look his way and ridicule the two offenders despite his inclination to being under the attention of the masses as he was doing this all for his lovely little cosplayer. He had a look of smugness on his face, seeing the two fools be escorted out by the security for trying to commit disrespectful acts at the convention. But in the end he got a tad overwhelmed from the attention thrown his way and began sweating a bit under the pressure.

Yandere Boss who couldn’t help but feel his social battery burning out at a fast paste due to the cheers of the crowd awarding his smartarian actions when to be honest he was just acting out on his own selfish impulses since he couldn’t stand those filthy losers touching his newfound idol he was going to worship for the rest of his days.

Yandere Boss who damn neared almost suffered a heart attack when his sweet idol saw his dilemma and guided him swiftly away from the crowd that chanting how much of a chad he was. Grasping onto the arm he slung over their shoulder with their soft hands. He couldn’t help but become stiff like a robot as his face flushed his natural tired aloof features with splotches of a rosy red on his pale skin.

Yandere Boss who’s lungs got caught in his throat as you spoke to him with your adorable voice continuously thanking him. He watched you intently as you paused for a moment to ask if you could give him a hug noticing how antsy he was with the the attention that was focused on him. Saying no words he opened his arms invitingly tired eyes now sparkling full of life as if he’d just received enlightenment from god while he nodded frantically to the point where afterimages of his bobbing head could be seen in 3 different layers.

Yandere Boss who fist pumped himself in victory after you gave him your number and left the scene. He was feeling faint with a rush of endorphins flooding his senses from the interaction. Relishing in your sweet scent that covered his clothes, he vowed in his head that he’d never ever wash these clothes that were touched by his adoring idol. He was already picturing them framed up in his closet to commemorate this beautiful moment in his life.

Yandere Boss who’s your number one fan and supporter for life, and will always be sure to disregard his duties if only to fawn over you like the crazed fan that he is.

[shadowfear-art]

I saw your one piece animated for terror au and it's amazingggg!

But could you maybe tell more about it? Is there gonna be a fic of it? (It there is it'll be awesome-)

Sadly no fic cause I can't write a full story to save my life... Anyway-

Ah ye! If you are new to the Au itself (because I've been using the concept for other fandoms so there are established rules and world building that carry over) I'll give a quickest general background summery then the story itself.

Future me note: This ended up being more than a summary.

There's a ancient eldritch pen that turns anything into a toon/living drawing, usually with the needed help of a human hand to wield it.

Basically pen finds a vulnerable human, tempts them to draw out their woes or wants (whether they want to or not), leaves them with the consequences and fate of creating a living cartoon character with all the chaos that happens in between. There's an abundance of good, bad, ugly, and bitter sweet endings to these "stories".

Toons tend to dissapear sometime after as they have a place to dwell.

Now for Luffy, age 5, modern universe setting, living on Windmill Island (but not for long). Tho this story deviates from the normal formula.

Luffy has always been surrounded by people and his two close 'brothers' for the short 5 years of his life it was perfect. Until it wasn't and does what it always does, life changes. The people around the boy had begun to move on as they were needed elsewhere.

Garp was called over seas, something military? Luffy didn't really pay attention.

Shanks travels the world as an occupation.

Funny enough both of his brothers were involved in a custody battle and were required off the island to attend.

And so on and so forth, all promising to return.

Leaving Luffy alone in the care of Makino, as time went on a large ache began growing in his tiny chest. Taking the notice of something sinister.

"...Follow me... follo... me..."

"... I have... Something to... show you..."

A dark pied piper began singing it's deceitful tune into the childs dreams and eventually lure him out at night.

---

On the other end of this trap is two murder toons Crocodile and Doflamingo, both sent from toon world to take care of a certain annoying goup of intrest.

Toons are chaotic creatures thats no secret but thier existence is due to how crafty and dangerous they can be as a whole (not that humans haven't tried to let the world know about them just always seemingly fail from coincidence) so obviously there's an agency out to take care of these creatures, N.E.T (Neutralization and Extraction of Toons) Is their codename.

The more violent toons are sent out remove the growing annoyance.

And this night was no different, NET agency was taking root on the island so the duo are there to be an effective deterant... And relive some violent needs. Win-win.

Then Luffy walked right in to the situation.

Crocodile knew a trap when he saw one, just was figuring out what type... Or the boy actually wandered into a massacre in the middle of the night, ALONE.

Right.

Needless to say he had the right approach, scare the child and inflict a small "scratch" to cement he's not supposed to be here, if everything goes right the boy will run away bawling his eyes out. A better option than what Doflamingo had in mind.

What he didn't account for was the half dead agent behind his distracted self shooting right through him unable to see the small human due to the toons large size and cloak. It didn't hit Luffy but splattered him with ink, which is essentially the toons blood, new problem for the child.

The black liquid is 99% lethal if it entered a living beings blood system and just having inflicted a wound across the boys cheek Crocodile can now count the minutes before the tiny human collapses.

Unfortunate but perhaps the boy may appreciate the large toon return the favor to another neglectful adult in his short life.

Quick work.

Doflamingo was the first to catch that the kid wasn't dead after.

For the first time in years Crocodile felt his ink run cold, it was a trap.

It was always a trap for him.

The 1%, only if the two are compatible, instead of dying forces beyond understanding would convert living creatures into what they are.

White and black splotches have already begun to appear across the boy's skin, hair, and clothes with increasing speed.

Unsurprisingly both boy and tthon start to show two types of panic, Luffy being the louder soon becoming disoriented with confusion and Crocodile's mind racing to find a option that didn't involve killing a kid... That being said It wasn't off the table.

Before he could come to a conclusion both large toons noticed that their time was up and had to leave immediately.

All three of them.

The last thing heard were echoing wails for those who promised to return to the child's side now gone to a place they could never reach.

End. And the Beginning.

(This au has a B plot)

[clockwork-freminet]

Waves crashed against the sand of the shores of Fontaine, a soothing background noise to Bailey, who was padding down the shore, his paws making imprints in the soft sand. He didn’t particularly WANT to be in prison, but it was kind of boring on the surface. Nowhere to fight for fun, and plus, he missed Wriothesely. But Monsiuer Neuvillette made sure he was taken care of well enough. The residents of the Court of Fontaine had left their old habits of ignoring him behind, so he got plenty of conversation in with the people while trying to figure out how society worked.

He let out a soft sigh, taking off his hoodie and folding it so that he could sit on it. His Pyro Vision emanated a constant warm glow that kept even his very soul insulated. Absentmindedly, he had started to form sort of an incoherent lump of sand with his hands, for no apparent reason. He was digging a small gash around the small form when something seemed to be out of place.

The softly ebbing and flowing ocean had been in his peripheral vision this whole time, but something… moved. He was sure of himself. He definitely saw something. His ears perked up and he leaned slightly forward as his huge tail thumped lightly against the sand, scattering the grains.

@boxer-boi

Freminet's search through the ocean hadn't yielded much today.

He wasn't exactly disappointed — usually the shore was littered in abandoned scraps and junk people had carelessly thrown away, and there being less of it today meant there was less chance of it harming Fontaine's sea-life — he'd just have to come back another day to search for more abandoned metal to use for his next upgrade for Pers. That, and he'd gotten to spend some time at his hideout with some of his animal friends... That had been nice.

With his search concluded, the diver made his way back to shore. He broke the surface of the ocean and swam to the sand, trudging his way through the shallower water and sitting down on a rock where he'd left his boots and jacket. He began to stuff some of his findings into the pockets of his coat, only to pause when he saw a shadow nearby. He lifted his head, and was met with... a person he'd never seen before.

The stranger had red hair and matching red face paint. He noticed the dog-like traits right away — the big floppy ears, the nose, the long tail that dragged behind him — but didn't pay it much thought. He was no stranger to animal-esque physical traits. Still, he couldn't help but wonder how he'd never seen this boy before. Even if it had just been a passing glance, he would have remembered an appearance so striking.

The boy stared right back, and Freminet quickly averted his eyes. He didn't want to be rude... Perhaps he just felt like spending some time at the beach. It was a sunny day, after all. He tried to act natural, continuing to fill his jacket's pockets with some of the discarded mecha parts he'd found in the sea. Though, he could feel himself start to grow nervous when the stranger's eyes didn't leave him.

[sylvanas-girlkisser]

Crack theory time.

So, one of the big visual differences between Arcane and League is Zauns technilogy glowing purple rather than green yeah? This is of course due to the addition of shimmer as an extension of chemtech.

It's also pretty heavily implied that shimmer is somehow tied to the waters around Piltover, or possibly the creatures therein. Like, to the point where I would go so far as consider it text.

Jinx also has pretty distinct animal theming, more so in League than Arcane: her minigun is a bunny, her rocket launcher is a shark, her grenades are piranhas etc.

So then in S2 we have Sevika's Jinx-ified arm right? And it' also a piranha.

Sure there could be any number of both Doylist and Watsonian explanation (e.g. Jinx had to scavenge for parts) but hear me out.

League tends to lean heavily on color coding to signify the origin of things, and purple/pink tends to be almost exclusively reserved for a certain deep sea themed group.

THE VOID!

I don't think we're gonna do a full deep dive into like, Icathia or whatever, but there was Silco's whole thing about being transformed after bleeding out in the waters of Piltover bay.

And then of course there's the "temple".

I've seen a few theories about who this is supposed to be, including Janna or Orianna, but here's the thing. League tends to be pretty consistent with the hairstyles of their characters... Cause otherwise you can't tell the womens faces appart.

Notice how there appears to be some sort of indententation on the statues forehead? You know who else has that side swept medium length hair? The scrunkly:

BEL-BEL!!!

Now I can't see them actually doing anything major with this, without doing some sort of acrobatic fucking pirouette over the shark. I just think its really elegant world building that you get to see this existential thread moving around in the background of the story.

In away, it's like the reverse of Marvel's post-credit "it's me, Plonko" approach to setting up sequels.

[magnificenteggsfarmpeanut]

The Flamingo’s Mate

A girl reincarnated in the One piece world and navigates through a pirate world with only memories of how One piece ends. 

CW: Trauma, PTSD, Angst, Romance, Hurt/comfort, Hurt/no comfort, Death and Anger.

Ad 1. August 26th.

"Where is this?"

The voice was a dry hoarse mess of mixed emotions. With a deep husky touch to it. Skin rubbed against the soft silk surface, probably of a couch or bench. Our main character had just opened her eyes fully, still groggy from being unconscious for what her body could only describe as blanks.

It was such a cliché setup, waking up somewhere unfamiliar and having a splitting headache. On the contrary, it wasn't something she had ever experienced before in her life, so the though was odd. The girl felt something prick her hands, a tingling sensation that felt weirdly unbearable.

Discomfort.

It was neither pain nor pleasure. An odd sensation with an strange background, especially compared to where she was before. Where was she before waking up?

The area was big, a bright light shone from the top down. The warm light illuminated the girl’s face. Her skin was almost shining like the sun setting on the mountain top. Dark brown skin blessed by the God’s and kissed by the heaven’s when she was born.

"Where is..."

Taking the place in, she could notice how strange everything seemed. She blinked her eyes, seemingly unable to truly react. There was no possibility to react well to what she saw. Bright pink walls, a round pink aquarium circling the whole room, except the door, filled with colourful fishes and of course pink furniture. The aquarium was the oddest thing she saw.

In it was a small sea monkey swimming, enjoying terrorizing a smaller fish. It laughed as it smacked the fish on the head then swam closer, intimidating him. The room was noisy, not too noisy that she couldn’t hear her own thoughts.  Therefore she should hear something, a voice speaking in her head, warning her of the danger lurking in this room.

However no one was speaking to her.  

It was a cold realisation, because she was a thinker. Every time she’d sit still her mind would bother her with random facts, idtiotic idioms or just something nonsensical. Her long braids were messed up, tangled in the softness of a velvet comforter.

Small almond shaped eyes bulged out of their respective eye socket.Creeped out by the pink flowers and pink aquarium staring back at her. Her lips were dry and chapped from being unconcious.  The room was unflattering, bright and quiet. The surroundings rocked, left, right, up, and down. Everything in her head was twirling, dancing at a rhythm she couldn't match.

Still the room had left an impression on the woman. Gently she inhaled deeply, chest tightened from the air filling her lungs. Her face contorted from the sudden pain.

“Why…?” Her voice was hoarse, barely having any colour to it.

Before her eyes a huge, injured cowfish swam close to the glass.. It stopped taking its time menacingly staring at the girl laying on a bench. It flashed its enormous sharp teeth, opening and closing as if it was trying to chew her through glass.

"How long have I been here?"

She turned her head, uneasy by the animal's glare. Her skin crawled, her throat felt heavy and full but nothing would come out. She fought an urge to cough in fear this would hurt her even more. Displeased by the strange surroundings she was determined to sit back up on the chair. Mustering up all her strength she pushed herself up, breath hitching as her bones throbbed from the pain.

“Aaaahhhh~”

She wanted to close her eyes, fall back down and enjoy the soft cushions pressed against her skin. But the headache and ringing in her ears would not subside. Her body was hot as if it were set on fire by poison.

"Why is my body so weak? I am fairly certain I did not do any heavy lifting."

With her open palm she rubbed at the surface, pleased and at the same time confused on where she was. The clock in her brain ran, trying its utmost best to figure out where she precisely was. What was with this burning that made her want to take off her clothes?

Slowly she pulled at the thin fabric sticking to her body. Sweat doubled as glue. The urge grew stronger as she felt her mind calm a little. For someone who was in pain, she had enough energy to undress.

"I can't seem to remember..."

She says the words, instead of thinking. Perhaps this would help her mind work faster. It was a habit of her to vocalize anything and everything whenever alone or having lost her train of thought.

Weakly she pushed herself off the surface, only for her hands to give out. It felt like her bones were brittle, turned to dust as her muscles were stiff like a month-old breadstick. Her head rolled backwards from throbbing.

How strange was the feeling she felt.

She fell back onto the surface, hands still on the velvet surface. Eyes twitched frantically as she wheezed at the pain that followed when she tried getting up. Frowning seemed impossible just from feeling this unpleasant.

She hated having barely any energy, so much so that she forced herself to get up again. And when she fell back down on the bench she sucked on her teeth, tears burned at the back of her eyes. Her eyes grew black and her cheeks pale as snowy clouds in the blue northern sky. Through the only window glimpses of a distant vast sea, white-capped, blue sea could be seen. On which she float like a jewel, softly the long waves rocking the ship were forgotten for the more imminent feeling. A hard rush of aching stings travelled upwards, slamming into her head.

pathetic

She was someone who had no idea how to give up. It just wasn't in the strong-willed women's vocabulary. And the current situation made no sense. How would you feel in such a situation just letting the tides flow? Yes. While thinking, she continued to struggle. Attempting to sit up for the third, fourth, fifth and sixth time. The heat from her back spread over her body.

A piercing sting travelled from her heart to her hands. Wincing she fell head first on the bench, thankfully the bench was soft and thick from the softest padding made by man.

"Why is there so much pink?" She scoffed at the sight of pink walls and matching pink flowers. Judging by all the flowers and trees, this was probably hell . "It's unsightly to the eyes..."

pathetic

Ignoring much of the pain she felt. If she didn’t acknowledge what was happening to her body, then she could then sit up. An odd way of thinking, however it always worked for her. Weakness, any form of weakness made her feel pitiful. Thus making up any excuse that it wasn’t weakness made her feel better about herself. It was impossible for her to get injured. She huffed and closed her eyes again, not feeling like getting up anymore. She didn't want to acknowledge she couldn't control her body and that it wasn't her fault.

pathetic

But the woman was one stubborn human. She opened her eyes quickly, even if she could barely control her body, the desire to sit on the bench was greater than the pain. If God had come down to beat her down she would still get up and cuss God for using her like this. Her muscles ached for unknown reasons. Determined she kept trying to get up, groaning, moaning and biting her plump lips. Even if it was futile and her body had no energy. Suddenly tears fell on the soft surface.

Her body had given up first. She fell down again, bones stiff like sticks and breathing slow like a clogged chimney. She felt so small, weak and obedient, that it was loathsome. Her mind persisted, telling her to keep going; She could get up before like back in the past. Back in the past…. Back in the past? Past? What does that mean?

pathetic

[thatrandombystander]

hows that guillermo pinoccio

It's a weird movie honestly. (Weirdness enhanced by being the one single person in the cinema during the showing)

I don't regret seeing it, but I also have some mixed thoughts and wasn't blown away by it, y'know? I feel like some of it didn't quite click with me, and I'd like to see some video essayists pull it apart and analyse it to help me appreciate it and/or figure out what didn't quite work

I purposefully avoided looking too much into the movie before I watched it so I didn't know too much about what to expect. I'm also not familiar with Pinocchio as an actual story beyond Disney's animated version and don't know anything about other adaptations over the last century

As always if you ask my opinion on anything, I'll give you an essay. Like, I'm putting this under a read more because it's genuinely almost 1500 words even after I edited out some paragraphs ✌

Visuals

The stop-motion animation was excellent, and I'm going to need to have a look for any behind-the-scenes clips.

Every now and then I'd start to forget that it's stop-motion, but then there'd be these little imperfections that would pull me back to go "whoa this is all done by hand!". For other films the temporarily loss of immersion would be an issue, but I think stop-motion as a medium really benefits from reminding you that it's stop-motion just so you can appreciate the artistry of it.

All the character designs were great, but I was especially 😮🤩 with the Wood Sprite (equivalent to the Blue Fairy from the Disney version) and her sister Death (yes Death)

There was also scenes with a water and ocean in them that I refuse to believe was stop-motion. Maybe some parts like sea foam and whatever were, but doing the whole thing in stop-motion would have been insane, so I'm guessing that they animated the characters and later composited in some computer animated water? (Not a complaint, just an observation.)

One downside I did notice was how the background of scenes were very still. In a computer animated film you would have like, movement of the wind rustling the trees and grass and all the little touches of movement to help things feel alive. In a stop-motion film, that would be SO MUCH work, so I suppose that's just a limitation of the medium.

Another downside is that not every character had the same level of expressiveness? There was one scene where Pinocchio was having a narratively touching conversation with a relatively minor character) and I couldn't help but wish that the other chara had more range of expressions. His face was quite rigid. Again, limitation of the medium in making face plates/heads for him.

But that's just me nitpicking things that stood out to me, quite impressed and enjoyed the visuals.

Sound

I forgot this movie was partially a musical when I went in lol. It was fine. There's not too many song and I think they were mostly all in the first half? That or my surprise at their inclusion just made the songs in the portion really stick out to me and by the time we got to the 2nd half I was just used to them. Don't really have any other particular thoughts about the music.

The voice acting was all good, Ewan McGregor in particular as the Sebastian J. Cricket (Jiminy Cricket) stands out to me because he sounded like he was having fun with the role.

Also Wikipedia is telling me that CATE BLANCHETT voiced Spazzatura the monkey which?? Are you really telling me they brought Blanchett along to spend 90% of her time just making monkey growls and whimpers and other such noises??????? Wild.

Surface Story

(some spoilers from here on out I guess?)

The film generally follows the same narrative beats as the Disney animated film, with a notable exception. Pinocchio wakes up/comes alive, gets sent to school but instead joins a shady circus.

Instead of leaving the circus and ending up in that carnival place that turns you into a donkey, Pinocchio ends up in uhh the Italian equivalent of a Hitler youth training camp (remember, this film is set in fascist Italy). This doesn't come out of nowhere, it was definitely build up to it but still. Wild.

After that, we end up in the belly of the giant fish (Monstro in Disney, but I think unnamed in this one), papa Geppetto is in there, time to escape. The ending is quite different from the Disney version tho.

I think personally I would have preferred if they had strayed from these narrative points a bit more? But I guess that's just me not quite connecting to the original Pinocchio story that much, so I didn't fully connect to an adaptation of it.

Narrative Themes

Perhaps the key theme of the film is obedience and blind obedience. From, Wikipedia:

"The original book sought the domestication of a child's soul in a way that del Toro perceives as blind obedience, del Toro identified Pinocchio's virtue to be the act of disobeying, assuming that while the book seems to favor that kids should obey their parents and be good, his movie focuses more on discovering yourself and decide what commandments given to you are acceptable or not."

The film definitely does explore this. Pinocchio being told he should obey his father/Geppetto, obey the circus ringmaster, obey the fascist government and be ready and willing to go war. He defies all these authorities in different ways, and in a way inspires a couple other characters being abused by authority to stand up against the people who have been controlling them.

(Geppetto also has some growth and comes to love Pinocchio for who he is, rather than rejecting him for not matching the obedient son Geppetto expected/wished him to be)

So yes, the film very much had a theme of avoiding blind obedience, and I liked this as a theme and I feel like a literally puppet character in fascist Italy is a great choice for this, but I something about how it was presented didn't quit click for me to turn it from decent to great. Again, might just be me, but I feel the film script might have benefited from another round of editing or a little extra runtime to cement things. Although I imagine that would be super costly with stop-motion.

Misc

This is the point of this ramble where I'd walked off to do something and have come back 2 hours later so I've lost a lot of steam and forgot about what I was gonna talk about?

Uhhhh what else.

Sometimes it felt like a kid's film, but other time it didn't? I think I went in expecting a more mature movie and was a little disappointed due to my incorrect expectations, but I think the film is more in line with a more mature kids movie like Coraline and I'd have enjoyed it more if I'd gone in with that expectation.

There was a point in the film where the solution to a problem was to have Pinocchio tell enough lies that his nose got big enough that it helped solve the problem. I liked that because I've always felt that the whole "Pinocchio's nose grows when he tells lies" never really did anything for the narrative's he's in outside of telling kids that it's immoral to lie. Actually thinking about that now, I'd say having this be a solution also ties into the rejecting blind obedience theme

Uhhhhh and now I'm completely running out of steam. My verdict is that I enjoyed the movie and loved the visuals and animation, but I wasn't blown away by the rest of it. It's a strange movie so it's not necessarily something I'd recommend to everyone to watch unless I know your media tastes. Stop-motion animation fans would definitely enjoy it tho, and I'm super looking forward to the gif sets that are gonna be on this site when the film releases digitally on Netflix in 2 weeks.

Speaking of Netflix, I'm hearing that they seem to be wanting to push this film into getting considered for the Best Picture award at the Oscars. I don't think it's got much chance at that, but I would like it up there for best animated work.

Well uh, thanks for reading if you've made it this far. No idea if it would be available near you in cinemas right now because it seems to be extremely limited runs with no marketing. Otherwise it's scheduled to hit Netflix on December 9 if you want to watch it on there (or somewhere else online I guess 🏴‍☠️)

[alphonseelriic]

Hello hello Sofia! 🎄

Sorry for letting a whole week pass, been so swamped lately. 😩 But how are you?! 

Omg, I only know winter holidays so it's always cool when I meet people from the southern hemisphere ^^ since the Christmas vibe is so different I imagine. 😅 The beach sound lovely!! How do you like to spend your day there?

And GOOD LUCK on your exams!! If I may ask, what do you study? 😄

Ooo very nice!! I watch more than I read but I also like all of the ones you mentioned in the first list except Jibaku I haven't seen! I also like JJK and KNY...and lmao same with CSM. Violet Evergarden is very pretty!! And a heart warming story, I think you'll enjoy it a lot!

So, what makes your favorite characters your favorites? Like what traits or what happens that make you think *oh yes this is the one*? 😆

Have a great week and be back soon ;3

- Animanga 🎅

Hi, Santa!! 💞 Please don't worry about it, I've also been super busy too!! It's the time of the year I guess 😔

Yeah Christmas here is defs very different, it's fun tho but also I feel like people are more focused on complaining about the hot weather than actually celebrating anything lmao as a kid I watched Christmas TV specials and thought the snow was much more dreamy

Oh I love the beach!! All my family does so I guess it's inherited heheh I mostly like swimming a little, watching the sunset and reading a book with the sound of the sea in the background <3 Now that I've talked about it, I really want to be there rn...

THANK YOU!! I really need it 😅 I'm a literature/english student, not the most difficult career out there but it still has its quirks. I do have a couple of scary finals next week which have made me succumb to academic stress, I can't wait for this to be over, really

Oh thanks for the recommendation, I'll def watch Violet now 💕 if you ever want to start jibaku shounen hanako-kun I would highly recommend reading the manga instead!! The anime is fine but it changes the order of some arcs and it's way too short lol

Hmmm, I'll try to answer that question as best as I can. There are certain characters that I simply find cute or endearing (like Nene or Yamaguchi from Haikyuu, who I think I forgot to mention last time). But when it comes to others I just think it has to do with a good balance of good traits and flaws. I tend to gravitate towards characters who are wholesome but also have much more to give if you see through them!

Alphonse for example (feeling obligated to mention him as he is my literal url) is a kind hearted and loyal kid, but he also has many fears, insecurities and even selfish moments throughout the show. I don't know if you watched/read FMA so I'm trying not to say anything with spoilers :p There's a couple scenes of him that never fail to pull my heartstrings, he's just very well written overall

Talking about shounen, I also like shounen protags that subvert expectations. Gon is a cute adventurous child at first sight but the more you advance with the plot the more you notice some serious flaws that make him so fascinatingly complex!! He's just a little fucked up and I love him for that.

There's also Rin Okumura, a character I've loved for so long (+10 years) that it's difficult to explain why. He also looks like a typical shounen protag at the start but he's also such a ray of sunshine and a brat at the same time! He deeply cares about his loved ones and goes through so much development. A greatly written teen character overall :')

Well I'll stop here bc it has gotten too long lol but I could talk about this all day

Hope you have a great week too dear <3 see you soon!!

[versadies]

hey!!! can i get stir-fried fillet, chicken tofu pudding, sakura mochi, apple cider & mustard please? 🪐 ty!!

the fall of haishan — beidou x gn!merperson!reader

name of order. THE FALL OF HAISHAN

date. beidou (w/ gn!merperson!reader)

receipt. stir-fried fillet (beidou) + chicken tofu pudding (pirate x mermaid au) + sakura mochi (angst) + apple cider (songfic) + mustard (drabble)

spices. angst/no-comfort, mentions of blood, mentions of violence, spoilers to beidou's lore, kinda rushed (?), not proof-read

ingredients. after becoming allies with pirates who has the same goal as yours, you instantly find your relationship slowly going from alliance to friendship, feeling attached to your new friends who treat you like one of their own – especially to a certain captain who has won more than just your respect.

requested background music (apple cider's bonus!). willow by taylor swift

vip list. @dawgimsohot @saving-for-xiao @scaraslover @kazu-topia @chiruru @aqualesha @renamichii

chef's note. hope this is to your liking 🪐 <<3 !!

i'm like the water when your ship rolled in that night

rough on the surface but you cut through like a knife

the first time you met beidou was during the days when she was haunting down haishan, the mighty sea creature who has been endangering both human and mermaid alike.

it was an accidental encounter really, you were exploring around the area after finding out that haishan was lurking around when you noticed the familiar gigantic sea monster swimming away followed by a ship chasing towards it, catching your attention in the process. you weren't supposed to intervene, since your mother had strictly forbid you to interact with anyone who dares to face haishan. but you couldn't help but start racing towards where it is when you noticed gigantic waves coming towards them.

you immediately stopped the waves crashing them with the help of your ability, not caring about the fact that you have exposed yourself fully to the humans who are on the ship – especially their mighty captain who watches you in awe and disbelief.

"you have my gratitude for saving my crew back there," she said, leaning against the rail with a genuine smile on her face as you shyly look away. "if i may ask, what brings you here? is this where your er.. kind lives?"

you shook your head. you were grateful that you were learning human language to actually understand words that were written in artifacts that came from human land. "i'm here to hunt down haishan. that monster has been killing so much animals and merfolk alike."

you saw the way her deep ruby eyes brightens from your explanation. "ah, so you're after the same opponent?" she then looks back at her crew, who were watching your interaction in awe. "this is a good thing for us."

you slowly rise up, showing the captain your whole face instead of half of it. "how so?"

"with the help of what you did to stop those waves, we'll be able to fight haishan easier and swiftly. we can tie it down from fighting while i try to slay it with my sword – we just need timing and the monster to show up."

you watched as she gives you her hand, causing you to raise an eyebrow in confusion. "so if you're interested, would you care to join us?"

and if it was an open-shut case

i never would've known from that look on your face

lost in your current like a priceless wine.

with reluctancy, you accepted the human's offer for you to join them in hunting down haishan and help them succeed with the help of your ability, causing the woman to immediately tell you a place where you can meet and make plans, somewhere where no human and merperson can find you and her working together.

you were honestly impressed with the woman, to say the least. the way she treats everyone equally alongside you made you have your respect to her, unlike most of the pirates you have encountered in your years of exploring around the ocean.

sometimes when you decided to stay around the ship and bask in the moonlight, you often find beidou above leaning on the rail and converse with you for hours even when it was her time to sleep.

"why would i want to sleep when i have such a beautiful view right in front of me?" she replies when you asked about her reason in staying up all night just like her crew. "who knows if this will be the last time i'll ever see it again."

you understood what she meant. you once heard your mother about how time is something precious to human, especially since their lifespan is shorter than your kind's, who can live for almost a thousand years and isn't aware of time.

but you never understood that the moon isn't the beautiful view beidou was talking about.

the more that you say

the less i know

wherever you stray

i follow

as weeks flew by, so did your friendship with the captain and her crew. it's impressive how no one in your home have noticed what you're doing, and you like to keep it that way – especially from your grandfather, who had never see humans in a good light.

nevertheless, your grandfather's view on humans never changed how you see the crux. especially when they had treated you as if you're friends and always chatted with you, much to beidou's delight.

moreover, you slowly began to stay with the crux more than your beloved home even after you were finished helping out with their plans, usually conversing with the captain as each and every person on the ship comes inside their rooms to rest, leaving you and beidou alone together the moment the moon shines above once more.

it was weird, you admit. this feeling you felt whenever the pirate looks down at your direction with a smile plastered on her face was something you had never felt before in your entire life. you're not complaining though, it's... a pleasant feeling.

"i've always dreamt of slaying a sea monster ever since i was young. from back where i live, i used to hear legendary tales of our god slaying sea creatures and i loved every single one of them," she explained one night, looking down at you from where she stands. "and now that i have an amazing ally who can help me, i think i'm close to fulfilling my dream."

since that night, you swore to fulfill beidou's dream until the end.

i'm begging for you to take my hand

wreck my plans

that's my man

the moment your animal friends informed you about haishan's presence coming towards the high seas – aka the area where the crux is – you did not hesitate to immediately swim towards where their boat sails, swimming as fast as you can in hopes of haishan being too late.

to your terror, the gigantic sea creature was swimming beneath the ship, your heart dropping at the sight that sends shivers down your spine.

you could hear beidou and her crew singing what seems to be a song thats about haishan, making you assume that they're not aware of its presence lurking below them with malicious intent, and you immediately rose up from the ocean and yelled beidou's name.

everything was a blur after that.

wait for the signal and i'll meet you after dark

show me the places where the others gave you scars

the moment haishan showed itself, beidou did not hesitate to make everyone start attacking the monster with everything they had as a storm appears in the sky, causing the ocean to become more dangerous and an obstacle to beidou and the crux.

as you swim around the battlefield and made sure that no other wave dares to wash over your friends, the sounds of cannons and shouts from the ship were heard along with the sounds of haishan's loudest roars, you knew that this battle will not end any time soon.

forgive me, mother, father, you thought to yourself. i might not be able to come home anytime soon.

and when you see yet another huge wave coming, you let out an exhausted sigh before raising your hands towards its direction, your hands glowing the colors of the sea reflecting the moon.

now this is an open shut case

guess i should've known from the look on your face

every bait and switch was a work of art

the battle raged on for four days.

you felt exhaustion washing over you as your body begs you to retreat and sleep, but with your friends in need of your help at this circumstances alongside the gigantic creature who you're sure will come towards your home after it's finished with you and the crux, you know you cannot back down now – not when you have gone this far.

suddenly, you heard a loud splash followed by the sounds of the crew yelling out beidou's name – causing you to stop what you were doing and look behind to see the commotion.

your eyes widens when you see haishan slowly diving back to the ocean, realizing that it's coming after beidou who's now in the waters.

without another thought, you immediately swam down towards the sea creature and beidou in hopes of saving the one you love.

you cannot let beidou die this way, you thought to yourself. you cannot let her go, not when she hasn't fulfilled her dream yet, not when you haven't told her how much you love her–!

you swam faster when you spotted the captain trying to swim up to the shore, your hands reaching towards her as haishan comes closer and closer to where beidou is.

at this moment, you knew that one of you won't make it out alive.

the more that you say, the less i know

wherever you stray, i follow

i'm begging for you to take my hand

wreck my plans

that's my man

in time, you wrap your arms around beidou as haishan misses its target, causing it to swim down way pass where you are and give you enough time to take her back to the ship.

"thank you for helping me" beidou said as many men helps her come back up to the ship from your arms, your shoulders tensed when you feel haishan coming towards you under the sea. "i owe you one for saving me from haishan."

you smile, though it doesn't reach your eyes.

"anything for you, love."

suddenly, you felt something around your tail, followed by you suddenly being dragged back to the ocean as beidou screams your name from above.

the last thing you see was her hand trying to reach out to yours before you descended to your death.

you know that my train could take you home

anywhere else is hollow

i'm begging for you to take my hand

wreck my plans, that's my man

it has been hours since beidou last saw you.

it was currently nighttime when haishan was in its element, and the fleet didn't dare to let go of their vigilance, determined to make your assumed death not to go to waste as beidou stands upon the prow, listening to her surroundings with caution and preparation.

your last words still rings in her mind, her heart aching in ways that she couldn't describe in words like poets do in romantic poems. if she wasn't so busy with fighting haishan, she wouldn't have tripped on her step and accidentally fell over to the sea for you to die.

you shouldn't have gone after her. she shouldn't have offered you to join her and risk your life saving them.

despite the freezing wind, beidou stands on her guard, her sword in her dominant hand as she waits for the right time. she just needs one strike, just one and she can kill the bastard who killed you.

it felt like another few hours have passed before she heard a change in the sound of the waves.

beidou grips her sword tightly before she immediately readies herself for the strike as the monster slowly rises from the depths of the sea, she ignores the fact that she hasn't eaten nor drank throughout her patience of waiting for the right time.

this is for you, y/n.

with one strong strike that sounded as if its wielder has the ability to slice a mountain in half or the experience of slaying creatures as huge as her opponent she faces, beidou chopped the sea monster's head.

as soon as she slayed haishan, the sounds of thunder was heard all throughout the sea, followed by a purple lightning that strikes down in front of the woman and a vision descending to her blood-covered hands.

hey that's my man

i'm begging for you to take my hand

wreck my plans, that's my man

since that fateful battle, the story of haishan's downfall became a legendary to the people in beidou's land.

although the captain's dream has been fulfilled and became an icon to almost everyone who thanked her for what she and the crew did, the crux knew all too well that their story of slaying haishan was a tragedy.

every night whenever they had no voyages to go for now, the alcor would be found somewhere at the same area as where the sea monster has been slain, sending prayers and blessings to the very merperson who has been killed right after saving their captain.

unnoticed by the crux, beidou would come towards to a certain railing and leans down, her heart aching when she realized that you're no longer below looking up at her with curiosity laced in your eyes that she grew to adore.

she then would look up to where the moon is, slowly reminiscing the days when she always stares at you instead of the moon above.

and every night, she'd mouth out the words that no one but the wind gets to hear.

"i love you too."

[anistrange]

MEDUSA AND THE SEA

An analysis lightly inspired by @coloricioso and @diioonysus

I'm gonna be honest with you, If you have preference for Ovid's version of Medusa and how to modern sensibilities this can be interpreted as a powerful message of the female rage, the clearly biased patriarchal behaviors that are still practiced in more subtle ways even within progressive countries; Go for it, it's a story that it might relate to you and may have hit some fibers in your heart. (Reception Studies, a concept that I'll always be in favor)

With that being said, it's important to notice that when it comes to the subject of Medusa as a whole, it seems like many people tend to forget very important aspects not only of her character, but the way how she interacted with the greeks, Not only as an apotropaic symbol (Which I'll write later in another post) but often as the dangers of the sea, and I'll explain this in very detail.

Medusa and her relationship with the sea

It's no surprise that apart from sky and earth gods, sea deities were very respected, feared and venerated among Romans, Egyptians, Greeks and Phoenicians, and yes, that includes Medusa.

It's also not a secret that before Ovid (fukin 800 years of difference), Medusa was a sea goddess who slept consensually with the monarch of the ocean Poseidon (Which by standards of Ancient Greece, that was pretty impressive tbh) However, it's important to notice how her background it's a key element to understand how this relationship came to be.

Hesiod clearly states that Medusa is the daughter of the Sea Titans (Phorkys the father, Keto the mother) whose offspring were clearly allegories of the sea dangers and creatures unbeknownst to man; Ladon, Ekhidna, Skylla, the Graeae and a plethora of siblings whose Medusa can relate, they were the bad boys of the area, cute Oceanids and Nereids were the benevolant part of the sea, but Phorkys and Keto's kids were the type of guy you would never cross any eye contact (heh, pun)

Medusa's bond with the sea is very defined and Poseidon clearly saw in her the epitome of wilderness that he likes, a wilderness described in scarying mortals to their very core, petrifying them like rocks his nature is complemented by hers; Sea, Mystery, Terror, the perfect match; You'll see this in every sea related-myth, Odysseus and the Sirens, Jonah and the Whale, Ran and her net.

No wonder why Amphitrite (the Queen of the Sea) is not eager to hunt her or punishing her kids unlike Hera, because she's an important part of the reign, And a fair headcanon of mine, She has no time to deal with bullshit like that, she has kids to take care and ruling the seas while Poseidon is just vibing back and forth.

And no wonder why Medusa even with her head only, she still keeps the bond with her home very close, note this with Perseus and Andromeda. Where do you think the monster that was going to accept Andromeda's sacrifice came from?? THE SEA and Perseus could defy the power of the sea if not with the very symbol that represents this same wilderness. Which it can be an interesting layer when it comes to apotropaic symbols again. But this is for another post.

Greeks did have some degree of fear and respect to this vast mass of water that extended from Egypt to Morocco, sure, for them it was the most effective route to trade goods, ideas and people, however The chances of being shipwrecked were absolutely high, either by storms, reefs that could run your ship aground, dangerous animals and sharpest rocks that could kill you at the slightest contact.

It's no surprise that in an attempt to cope with the hardships of such an unpredictable force of nature they decided to assign divine background, Poseidon is the storm in the middle of nowhere, Medusa and her sisters are the reefs or creatures that could petrify you to death, the Sirens were old ships destroyed at the rocky cliffs waiting for the next oblivious sailor.

To this very day, the fear and respect for a grandiose mass of water is still ingrained in our minds, the fear of being castaway, The curiosity to knowing how many mysterious creatures roam at the bottom of the ocean, of the lives of people where the sea is their last resting place.

So for those who still want to give Ovid a fair shot for making something groundbreaking, again, fair enough, but I'll keep saying that you're only seeing one aspect of hers while the other part is still unexplored and it makes a huge disservice on how she's very degraded to a simple victim -> cursed -> killed dare I ever say "trope"; Take this more as an encouragement to expand and analyse more of her character if you want to have an extended and more complet interpretation of Medusa, Anyone having an opinion on this are free to speak and I'll hear you.

[starvine]

first date headcanons

attack on titan (modern au)

summary: some first date headcanons with some of the attack on titan characters. 

warnings: none, just fluff :)

eren jaeger: movie 

a little basic but it’s all eren could come up with

besides, it was between a movie and dinner and dinner felt too formal so y’all decided on a movie

he’d let you pick the movie tho

he might argue with you if it’s something stupid and claim that it’s horribly written (as if he knows a thing) but that’s it

eren would make sure to get the BEST snacks. spicy food? check. candy? check. popcorn? check. fruits? check.

he just wants to impress you (even if he did have to confide in his friends for some advice)

he just really likes you

during the movie, you guys would start shifting closer to each other, both a little too timid to move all the way all at once

but you guys would make commentary throughout the movie, laughing when things seem too cliché or when a character says something funny

half way throughout the movie, you guys aren’t even really paying attention it it

you’re too busy throwing popcorn at each other and trying to catch it in your mouths, feeding each other candy, and giggling at each other

it’s intimate in its own relaxed way, which makes eren realize how perfect you are

you both could make the most out of a pretty average first date situation and make it into a beyond amazing first date

and that was all he needed to ask you on a second date before he dropped you off at your car, walking with you to make sure you got there safely

and ngl you’d be a bit of a fool to say no to eren

armin arlert: aquarium 

sweetheart is so nervous 

before he came to your apartment to pick you up for your date, he was a little nervous wreck 

he was fidgeting with his fingers, playing with the buttons on his shirt--he probably accidentally opened one by accident 

but once he saw you, he felt fine 

it was as if he physically melted, you just make everything okay 

once you guys got to the aquarium, he would NOT shut up

he was probably pointing things out, telling you fun facts, asking you what is your favorite marine life 

“oh, you like pufferfish? that’s cool! i like them too. they’re very... puffy.” 

he’s like a child in a candy store 

but while he’s rambling about how the digestive system of a sea cucumber basically cleans the ocean, he’s wondering how he should make a move 

he doesn’t want to scare you off or anything, but he doesn’t want you to be disappointed 

but while you guys are looking at one of those large fish tanks, the ones where you walk through a tunnel, you guys just sort of stand there and watch in awe

or rather armin watches in awe while you look at him, a soft smile gracing his pink lips as his eyes dart across the illustriously blue colored glass

and when he feels your pinky latch onto his, he’s a little shocked that you had made the first move

he didn’t not expect it per say, he just thought that he would be the one to make the first move 

but his overthinking got in the way

and when he turns to look down at your intertwined pinkies, he caught you sending him a delicate smile that made his heart squeeze until he felt as if every part of him was on fire

but it was him who finally held your hand fully 

he just needed you to give him the extra push

mikasa ackerman: book store 

it’s a very calming atmosphere, which is something you’d both need for this first date

mikasa is probably pretty anxious for the first date, and wants to make sure you’re okay and enjoying yourself while also making sure she’s okay and enjoying herself

so the calming scent of the book store and the quietness is perfect for her to multitask between mediating the two

you’d both be tasked with picking each other books and then buying them for each other

so initially mikasa was nervous because she wasn’t sure what to get you but then you asked what she liked to read and so that allowed her to ask the same, making the situation less stressful

and all while you two are walking from isle to isle, eyes scanning the various book titles and covers, she sneaks glances at you and how pretty you look

and the fact that you seem very deep in thought, heavily concentrated on getting her the right book, makes her feel less concerned on whether or not you’d rather be with her or not

the answer is obviously a yes but mikasa has a hard time understanding that sometimes

so when you give her the book you bought for her, making sure to lightly touch her fingers while you hand it to her, she already knows that another date is what she wants you both to have or else she’ll probably explode

and based off of how flushed she looks, the possibility of her exploding is not highly unlikely

you guys will sit at this little table in the corner of the store, reading your books

i can picture mikasa annotating certain lines that remind her of you, making mental notes to show you later

overall, the date is pretty lowkey and very sweet

connie springer: dave + busters/bowling

ok there’s not much of an explanation for this one besides the point that if feels right

like connie is pretty energetic and i feel like you can learn a lot about a person based off of the games they’re drawn to 

hence the arcade

i think connie really likes those racing games or the zombie shooting games

he also claims he’s really good at ski ball (he’s not, he’s trash)

so a good portion of the date consists of you just laughing at him the whole time cuz in all honestly he’s not the best at games but he enjoys them for the fun of them

he’d definitely cheer you on when you were playing or try to mess you up if it was you two against each other

but either way he’d give you a hug or a pat on the head after every game

even if u beat him

he’d probably try to sneak a kiss when you guys were in one of those shooting games that requires a booth and the curtains drawn (does that make sense?)

it’s not really romantic like at all, especially since it smells like a million different people in there, but it’s very low stress so in all honesty that’s what makes the kiss nice

and after you guys had used up all your tokens, you’d combine your tickets and pick something together

your prizes would mostly consist of candy and him insisting he get you a plastic gem ring so you can always remember your first date together

it was also his little, strange way of asking you for a second date

levi ackerman: art museum 

unlike connie, he’s not super energetic

so a museum is right up his alley

levi’s a bit awkward, he doesn’t really know how to talk to you

and especially since you’re lovely, his words jumble together and he gets all flustered

so a nice, quiet museum exhibit is perfect for him

it’s a nice balance between casual and formal, so you both dress nice but aren’t restricted by the need to be super polite and stuff

he’d probably like it when you try to imitate the poses that are shown in the paintings or sculptures

just imagine the soft chuckle he’d be unable to prevent from escaping his lips which then melts into a soft smirk

beautiful, beautiful lad

he probably wouldn’t join you though, he doesn’t want to embarrass himself

he just smiles at you and stares at the art, reading the background info they give on those little plates near them

but he would notice when you stare at him

he could be looking at some art made during the dutch golden age, but as soon as your head slightly tilted in his direction, his cheeks would HEAT up

you almost asked him if he was feeling alright he was so red

but as the date went on, levi really just thought about how much he enjoyed your presence

and he’s not a wicked talkative guy so being able to feel comfortable with someone even if you aren’t talking or doing much is pretty important to him

as the date concludes, levi finally works up the courage to place his hand on your shoulder, asking if there was anything else you wanted to see before the museum closes for the day

his face might be bright red, but the smile you give him makes him feel a little less embarrassed

what can you say, you’ve got charm 💅

hange: the fucking zoo

ok i won’t lie when i got the idea of hange taking you to the zoo for your first date i thought it was so funny and idk why

like they’d be so excited that they’d nearly forget that they’re on a date with you

they’d drag you around from exhibit to exhibit, pointing out the exact breed of tortoise or some really strange fact about the zebras without looking at the little description panel in front of the exhibit

it’s pretty comical

but then randomly, when you guys are sitting down and eating some fries from one of the concession stands, they start going on a rant about animal cruelty and how a lot of zoos don’t treat the animals properly

and you’re just sitting there like “what 🧍‍♀️” cuz they’re mood changed so quickly LMAO

and as soon as their rant started, it finishes and they’re rushing you to the reptile exhibit

they’d probably try to figure out if they could hold one of the snakes

you’d have to drag them out of there before they start harassing one of the workers into letting them hold a snake

they’d also give all of the animals names only to forget them in 2 seconds

“hey, robert, it’s good to see you again!” “hange, i thought you named them dante?” “oh... did i? 😁”

however there’s probably like one animal they absolutely despise and idk why but i feel like it’s parrots

y’all would be walking through this rainforest exhibit, birds flying from tree to tree and the whole time they’re cursing the birds under their breath for no reason at all

just an angry person walking through a rainforest exhibit, cursing out birds

pretty normal if you ask me

however, the date itself is pretty casual and almost feels like you guys are just hanging out

or it would if they didn’t ask you out on another date before dropping you off at home, kissing your cheek as their farewell

pieck finger: café

very simple and quaint

i feel like pieck has a coffee addiction and always puts her in a better mood

so what better place to go on a date then a café?

she’s definitely an iced coffee drinker, and will occasionally go for a hot drink but usually iced coffee is her go-to

and if you get a coffee or tea that she also happens to like, you’re already practically golden in her eyes

since pieck has a very soothing and lowkey nature, i can see the date being much more just like a conversation with someone you’ve known for forever instead of interview-y which is something i’ve found coffee/lunch/dinner dates to be a bit like

but pieck knows how to keep things interesting and she’s a pretty calming person to be around so all is well

i also can’t see her getting super nervous before the date

she seems pretty calm unless in high-stress situations, but even then, she’s pretty level-headed

but since she’s so calm, it makes you wonder if she really cares for the date

and of COURSE she does, she’s so excited about it

it’s just the way pieck is

but as the date continues, she’d probably start to tease you by playing footsies under the table

you gotta keep the date interesting, you know?

you guys would talk about your interests, family, friends, shows you’re watching

literally just anything and everything that’ll allow you guys to get a feel for each other

and if all goes well she’ll definitely suggest another date ;)

also don’t expect to leave without her either writing something cute on your cup, pressing a lip-stick stained kiss to your cheek that matches the one surrounding the rim of her cup, or a promise that your game of footsies will continue next time you see each other

[hootnhoney]

dont mean to feel like a bother, i AM wondering if you ever watched breadwinner or song of the sea? (The latter being more similar to the things you seemed to enjoy from Wolfwalkers). These movies are just really dear to me and i dont have a lot of people to talk about them with. That being said, i’d love hearing your thoughts on any cartoon saloon movie :)

I’ll react as I watch ;)

⚠️ Spoilers for song of the sea ⚠️

First impression: I love the music! And voice acting! It’s so pretty and nice on the ears. I need to get that playlist on Spotify.

-this blond boy is a little punk isn’t he?

-oh this little girl is so sweet I want to scoop her up and give her a hug!!

-the animation isn’t as fluid as wolfwalkers but the style is just as pretty. I’m in love with the colors and lighting! Again I love the simple shapes of each character.

- idk who these 3 masked ppl looking for a selfie are but I think I’d trust them with my life. Oh and they sing! I love the music!!!

- ohhhh she has to speak to sinnggg. Ooooooo. Oh she’s precious but poor baby.

- “good neighbors!?” As in fae!? We have selkies and now fae. Ahhh I love Celtic folklore. Love love love it!!

-this boy has got her on a leash :| SHES the selkie let her do her thing bro

- PUPPY IS BACK :D!! Take them home puppy!!

-just like wolfwalkers we have watercolor background which is just gorgeous!!

-CHILD DOWN I REPEAT CHILD DOWN. NOT THE WHITE HAIR

- ok he lets himself get hurt (the stinging leaves) to keep her safe and in return she give him the leaves to alleviate the pain. That’s very sweet and I’m glad they’re not just fighting.

- well now I know what a seanchaí is. Very cool.

-ooooh that’s what that stone giant is?! This is so interesting

- *gasp* mum

- “dad, where’s mum” hear that? That’s the sound of my heart breaking

“The jars can’t be broken they’re enchanted” bro just unscrew the lid

-ah yes on of my my favorite life lessons; Pain is part of life. It comes hand in hand with the happy feelings

- OH MY GOD THE SHELL. OH MY GOD THE CHILD. GET THAT COAT BITCH!!

-ok the dog running scene towards home and the wolf running scene from wolfwalkers really shows the improvement in animation. Don’t get me wrong I still like both but the improvement is super noticeable.

-oooo I love the animation of everyone being revived. So pretty. And all the music!!! The giant!! He’s back :0

-MUUUUUUUM OMG MUUUM,,, oh. Ok ur leaving ur whole family. And for what? Ur just not gonna explain? Just mysteriously leave? :| bruv

-ok that movie was adorable I love the music and all the Celtic folklore in it. All the characters were very lovable and fun, even the ones with only a little screen time (cept for mum and dad. I didn’t get a lot of personality from them for some reason) The good neighbors are my favorite. 

[hellzabeth]

i have opinions about The Prince of Egypt musical adaption and you’re going to listen to them: An Essay

So, quick disclaimer: The Prince of Egypt is one of my favourite movies of all time. The casting, the music, the animation, I think it’s one of the top-tier movies that have ever been made. I went into seeing the London West End production of PoE with a full expectation that nothing I saw on stage would ever live up to how much I love the movie. I was fully aware there are plenty of limitations to what can be shown live on a stage with human actors and props.

That being said, I was enormously disappointed with how the whole thing was handled.

The Good

Now before I launch into a whole tirade of what I didn’t like about the production, it does behoove me to say what I think they did do well. 


The casting of the role of Moses was done fantastically, as was Miriam, Tzipporah, and Yocheved. The swings and the ensemble were really engaged and well placed, going through lots of quick changes to go from Hebrews to Egyptians to Midianites and back.


The two Egyptian queens, wifes of Seti and Ramses, are actually given names, lines, and character beyond being simply tacked onto their respective kings. We get to see how they feel about the events happening around them, and there’s even a scene where Ramses meets his wife and courts her, whereas in the movie, she stands in the background and says nothing. This is one of the areas I was hoping the musical, which would naturally have a longer run-time, would expand on, and I was pleased to see the opportunity was taken.

Light projections on enormous curtains were used to very good effect, taking us instantly inside the walls of the palace and then out to the desert. 


Over all, the work was really put in to be engaging and emotional, and the orchestra really worked to deliver the right musical beats.


One of two stand out scenes as being done very well was the opening “Deliver Us”, which included a bone-chilling moment of Egyptians separating a mother and her baby, with her screams as she’s dragged off-stage, and the blood on the guard’s sword. It really brings home the fear as Yocheved tries to lead Aaron and Miriam to the river with her, not to mention Yocheved’s actress nailed the lullaby. 


The second was at the other end of the show, “When You Believe” was beautifully performed by the whole cast, though it was somewhat stunted by what came before...

The Bad

Oh boy.

So the main problem with this show is not the music, not the staging, not even that sometimes the ensemble was a little off-beat (the lai-lai-lai section in Though Heaven’s Eyes comes to mind). Any mistakes there can all be forgiven, since sometimes things just happen in live performance, someone’s a bit off or something’s just not possible to do on the budget allotted. 


The problem is in the script.

The Prince of Egypt movie is a story that stands not only on the shoulders of its fantastic music and visuals, but also on its emotive retelling and portrayal of the characters within - mainly Moses and Ramses. And while the stage musical does spend a lot of time with the two mains, it neglects two other, incredibly important characters.

Pharaoh Seti, and God. 


In the movie, Seti strikes an intimidating figure. He is old, hardened, and wise in the ways of ruling his kingdom - and is voiced by Patrick Stewart, who brings his A-game to the role. Both Moses and Ramses admire him and look up to him immensely as young men, and the relationship he has with both of them deeply informs their characters as the story progresses. It’s from Seti that Moses learns that taking responsibility for your actions is the respectable thing to do (and later, the true horror of having your idol turn out to be not what you think), and it’s from Seti that Ramses takes a huge inferiority complex.

There are two lines that Seti gets in the movie, one spoken to Moses, and one to Ramses. These two lines define Moses and Ramses’ actions later on in the story:

To Ramses - “One weak link can break the chain of a mighty dynasty!” To Moses - “Oh my son... they were only slaves.”

Guess which two lines are absent from the musical?

One Weak Link is turned into an upbeat song, rather than shouted at a terrified and cowed young Ramses. Instead of being openly a traumatic, internalised moment of negative character development for Ramses, it’s treated as a general philosophy that Seti passes down to his son. Instead of a judgement that is hung over Ramses’ head like a sword of Damocles, lingering in his mind through the whole story and coming up in a shouted argument with Moses later, it’s said and then moved on from. 


The “they were only slaves” comment, on the other hand, is absent entirely. This changes Moses’ relationship with Seti enormously, as well as his relationship with the Hebrew people. Upon finding the mural depicting the killing of the slave children, Moses is appropriately horrified, and Seti shows up to comfort him and defend his terrible actions. Moses leaves this interaction... and then sings about how this is indeed all he ever wanted! He has no moment of horrific realisation that his father thinks of the slaves as lesser, as lives that can be thrown away. This means that the scene where he kills the guard doesn’t lead into a discussion of morality with Ramses as he runs away, but rather Moses breaking down about his heritage as though it’s a negative, instead of something he’s realised is just as valuable as his life as an Egyptian. Instead of Moses being shown as having a strong moral core that protests against the idea of any life being lesser, he bemoans his Hebrew blood loudly, and makes little mention of the man he killed. His issue that causes him to run away is being adopted, rather than his guilt that he’s a murderer, and nothing Ramses can say will change it.

Later on, we don’t see Ramses express this opinion either (in the movie - M:”Seti’s hands bore the blood of thousands of children!” R:“Hah, slaves!” M:“My people!”) so it seems the core reasoning for the necessity of the extremes God had to go to in order to convince Ramses to let the Hebrews go is completely gone.

Which leads us into God Himself, as a character. 


God is a tricky topic in general. He is hard to talk about as a concept and as a character, and even harder to depict in a way that won’t offend someone. The Prince of Egypt movie always struck me as a very good depiction of the Old Testament God - vengeful and strong-willed, commanding and yet nurturing, capable of great mercy and great cruelty in one fell swoop. God is incredibly present in the story, a character in and of Himself, speaking with Moses rather than simply commanding him. The conversation at the Burning Bush is bone-chillingly beautiful. Moses is allowed to question, he’s allowed to enquire, he’s allowed to express how he feels about God’s choice, and God is given the chance to respond (and reprimand, and comfort).

In the musical, the Burning Bush scene lasts all of two minutes, during which God (the ensemble cast, acting as one moving flame, speaking in unison) monologues to Moses, and Moses is not given room to question, talk to, or build a relationship with God. Later on, once some of the plagues have gotten underway, Moses rails against God, flinches in his resolve, and tries to back out... and God says nothing. It’s Miriam and the spirit of Yocheved that convince Moses to keep going. As a character, God is nearly absent. Even when it comes to calling upon the Plagues, or parting the Red Sea, God’s voice is absent. Moses does not pray. He does not even use the staff that God encouraged him to pick up as a symbol of his becoming a shepherd of the Hebrews out of Egypt. 


It’s these little changes, these little absences of such vital lines and presences, that ends up changing the whole vibe of the show. Seti is more like a dad than an emotionally distant authority figure, and God is more like an emotionally distant authority figure than a character at all. Ultimately, the whole feeling that one is left with at the end…

The Ugly

… is that the script doesn’t like God, or religion in general.

A bold statement to make, considering the source material is one of the central biblical stories in EVERY Abrahamic religion. Moses as a figure is considered so important and close to god, that The Prince of Egypt, even with its sensitive portrayal, cannot be aired in a number of Islamic states, because it’s considered disrespectful to depict any of the prophets, especially an important one like Moses. Moses is arguably the MOST important prophet in the Jewish canon.

However, I haven’t highlighted one of the most noticeable script changes - the elevation of Hotep, the high priest, to main antagonist.

In the original movie, Hotep is a secondary villain, a crony to the Pharaohs, bumbling and snide and two-faced. He and his fellow priest Hoy are there primarily to juxtapose how charlatans can control power through flattery and slight of hand, reassuring Ramses that Moses’ miracles are merely magic the same as what they can do. They even get a whole villain song, “Playing With The Big Boys” which is a lovely deconstruction of lyrics vs visuals, where while the priests boast that their gods and magic are much more powerful, in the background the staff, transformed into a snake by god, devours and defeats the priests’ snake handily. The takeaway from the song is that God’s power is true, and doesn’t need theatrics.

It’s a good little nugget of wordless world building. And it is completely absent from the stage musical, with only a vague reference to the chant of all the gods names.

Hoy is gone, and Hotep is the only priest. He actively speaks out against the Pharaoh, boasts about having all the power, and is played as bombastic and proud. He’s a wildly different character, even threatening Ramses at one point. In the end, it’s shown that Ramses won’t let the Hebrews go not because he has inherited his father Seti’s cruel attitude towards the lives he considers beneath him, but because he is being actively bullied by the priest, and will lose his power and credibility if he doesn’t do as he’s told. Ramses is even given a whole song about how little power he really has. The script desperately wants us to feel sorry for Ramses’ position and hate the unrepentantly, cartoonishly evil priest.

That’s another matter as well - a LOT of time is dedicated to making the Egyptians more human and sympathetic, portraying them as largely ignorant of the suffering beneath them, rather than actively participating in slavery. Characters speak out of turn without regard for formality and class, even to the royal family. They are casual, chummy even. And this would be fine - in fact, it’s good to have that sort of third dimension to characters, even ones who are doing reprehensible things, to show the total normalcy and banality of evil - if it were not for the fact they still include a completely open-and-shut case of evil right next to them.

Hotep has no redeeming features. And on the other side, God is barely present, certainly not in a relatable context. Moses has several lines about how cruel and unnecessary God’s plagues are - and you know what, in this version, they are unnecessary! Ramses is not the stone-hearted ruler that his movie counterpart is, he has no baggage over being a potential failure, because it was never really given to him in the same way! By taking away Ramses’ threatening nature, numbers like the Plagues lose half their appeal, as the back-and-forth ‘you who I called brother’ lines between Moses and Ramses are completely absent. Moses is faithless, and is less torn between the horror of what he’s doing and the necessity of it for the freedom of his people, and more left scrabbling for meaning that he doesn’t find. And the only thing hanging over Ramses is Hotep nit-picking everything he does and threatening him, which is considerably less compelling than the script seems to think it is.

This is best exemplified at the end, when all the issues come to a head. The angel of Death comes and takes the Egyptian first borns (which was actually a well done scene), and the Hebrews leave to a rousing rendition of When You Believe. But then we cut to Ramses and Hotep, with Hotep openly threatening to revolt against the Pharaoh - whom was believed, especially by the priesthood, to be a living god! Hotep is so devoid of redeeming features he cannot even be trusted to stand by his beliefs! - unless Ramses agrees to chase after the Hebrews. Reluctantly, Ramses is badgered into the attempt.

Back with the Hebrews, Moses parts the Red Sea… not with his faith, not by praying to God for another miracle, not even by using his staff as in the most famous scene of the movie… but by holding out his hand and demanding the ‘magic’ work. Setting aside the disrespect of Abrahamic religions to call one of the most famous miracles “magic” (and my oh my, if there was a fundamentalist of any religion in the audience they might have gasped to hear it), it again belittles the work of God, and puts all the onus on Moses, not as a conduit for God’s work, but as the worker himself. Then, the Egyptians arrive in pursuit, lead by Hotep, not Ramses. Moses sends the Hebrews through first, lead by Miriam, and stays behind with Tzipporah… to offer his life in penance to Ramses! The script has completely stripped both Ramses and Moses of their convictions towards their causes, and Moses cannot even stand by his decision to lead his people.

Then, in a moment of jarring melodrama, Moses has a sudden vision that Ramses, his brother, will one day be called Ramses the Great (an actual historical Pharaoh who reigned 1279-1213 BCE). There is no historical evidence that this was the Ramses that ruled over the Hebrews (there are 11 Pharaohs called Ramses through the history of Ancient Egypt), and maybe if the scene was acted a little better, it wouldn’t have been so sudden or jarring. Even more jarring, is that then Hotep arrives with the rest of the army, and Ramses refuses to lead the charge into the parted sea. Hotep does so himself, and is the one to have the final dramatic moment, being crushed under the water.

The Takeaway

After watching the show, I’m afraid I could never recommend it as either a play, an adaption, or even as a faithful retelling of a bible story. Its character drama isn’t compelling enough to be good as a standalone play, with it two main characters declawed and their core motivations reduced to a squabble between brothers rather than a grand interplay between two cultures and ideas and trauma handed down from their father. As an adaption of the movie it’s upsettingly bad, with grand numbers like the Plagues rendered piecemeal and fan favourites like Playing With The Big Boys missing entirely. As a retelling of the bible story, it’s insulting, completely cutting God out of the equation, taking no opportunity to reintroduce Aaron as an important character (which he was, in the bible, as Moses was a notoriously bad public speaker, with a stutter, and Aaron often interpreted for him) and more importantly, completely erasing God’s influence from the narrative.

I don’t know who this show was… for, in that case. If it wasn’t for drama lovers, movie fans, or people of the faith, then who the hell was it for? Why change such a critically acclaimed and well-beloved story? Why take away all these defining moments? If you wanted to tell a story about how religion is the true evil, how God can command people to do terrible things, and how those who uphold organised religion like Hotep are unrepentant, one-dimensional monsters… why would you tell that through the Prince of Egypt?

Underwhelming at best, infuriating at worst… just watch the movie. Or read Exodus. At least the Bible’s free.

[it-was-all-a-beautiful-dream]

Opposites Attract (Paul Lahote x Reader) Chapter 3

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Warnings: Swearing

Word Count” 2.1k

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-Your POV-

They were running at a speed that seemed impossible, their size alone, impossible. The shear beauty of the animal, breath taking. This wasn’t the first time you’d dreamt of giant wolves. They visited your dreams frequently, leaving you with all sorts of un answered questions, leaving you the next day, searching “What does seeing giant wolves in your dreams mean?” Yup, you were that kinda girl. You thought there was an answer for everything, and there probably was, but you weren’t going to find the answer on google search. 

You don’t know how long you’d been in the car for. All you knew was you were in pain, then it seemed to ease and a sense of comfort washed over you. Your head felt as if it were floating, snuggled into something warm and soft. A pillow perhaps? You didn’t open your eyes to check, the pain in your abdomen and now across your whole body blinding, you’d woken a few times with a jolt, and then you passed out again. 

The next time you woke up you weren’t moving at all, which you were grateful for, the pain mixed with the motion of a moving vehicle didn’t do anything for your stomach, travel sickness was the bane of your life. Instead you found yourself in a room, the blinds drawn closed, the door shut, your body, in different clothes. A mens t-shirt? When did you get changed? Where were you? You looked around in a daze, sitting up slightly from the comfort of the pale yellow duvet set. Wooden log walls, photo frames scattered on every surface, subtle lighting and a wall lined with books, the smell of home cooking wafting through from the kitchen. You were in Emily and Sam’s guest room, how did you know this? Well for one all of the frames had pictures of the happy couple in, two, you’d stayed over once before, back when you’d been caught in a freak storm with Leah while on the beach. You vaguely remembered the place. You didn’t come over often, what with Leah and Sams history, that and as much as you liked Paul, sometimes you’d be nervous to bump into him. Paul! Speaking of Paul, you groaned and flopped back into the fluffy bed sheets. Paul was at the hotel when the pain started… where was he now? Did he drive with you back home? 

You were about to get up when Leah came bounding through the door. “Oh good I thought I could hear you awake in here.” She grinned at you. “You look like you’re feeling much better!” You pat the space beside you and Leah climbed in snuggling up to your side. 

“So, on a scale of one to ten how bad was it.” The big ‘It’ being how bad was the show in front of your long term crush. Leah shrugged as she looked at you. 

“Nothing was baddd… everyone was just worried about you, you seemed to be in some serious pain, hence why we thought it best to cut the trip short, it’s probably better that were home, it was early hours when we got here so Sam said we could just crash at his.” You raised your eye at you best friend. She was being awfully calm about the whole situation. She said Sams name in a sentence and didn’t get herself worked up. You looked down at yourself. 

“And the clothes? Or lack there of….” That’s when Leah grinned. You didn’t like the way she was looking at you. You inhaled the scent that was on the shirt. Sandel wood and aftershave, a hint of sea salt probably from the misty air outside. 

“That’s Pauls t-shirt Y/N” Your eyes went wide and you knew you were blushing.. did that mean he had undressed you. Leah noticed the panic in your eyes.

“Before you get worked up he just leant the t-shirt knowing you’d be uncomfortable in your dress, I changed you.” You audibly gave a sigh of relief, not knowing how you’d react if the guy you’d been in love with since second grade had finally seen you in your underwear. “He stayed in here with you last night you know, to make sure you were okay. He wouldn’t leave.” Leah was now proper up on one arm looking at you. You didn’t know what to make of it. You didn’t think Paul had even known you existed… You were taken from your train of thought when something started dinging. The mobile on the bedside table started beeping as texts came through one by one. Oh god, you hoped Leah hadn’t told your parents about your episode at the hotel, the last thing you needed was for them to worry. However, you realised when you picked it up, it wasn’t your phone. 

The screensaver was a picture of the guys from the res, all goofing around, it looked like it had actually been taken in Emilys kitchen. It had to be one of the guys. You realised it was Paul’s after remembering what Leah had said about him staying for some of the night. He must have forgotten it when he left. You didn’t mean to see the message but it automatically came up on screen when you tilted the Iphone in your hand.

“Such a shame we had to cancel our date last night handsome, still on for tonight?” There were a bunch of emojis next to the text, the purple devil, aubergine, water droplets. You didn’t have to be a genius to figure out whoever this girl was motives were. At first you were embarrassed, to the point where your mouth was kinda slack and Leah was asking you what was wrong. Then you were pissed. 

“He’s such a dick, honestly. I don’t know why this makes him a dick, i’m just so mad. I know I’m not the prettiest, or the funniest, or most talented or anything but jesus christ I wish he would just notice me for once instead of these girls who will put out at the drop of a freakin hat!” Leah had taken the phone from you to see what you were talking about. She groaned and then noticed your whole body was shaking, in a flash she was at the door calling for Sam and the others. All you could see was red. Your vision totally blank, the covers under your hands balled up in your fists tight, your body shaking, heating up. Somewhere in the background you could hear someone shouting at you to calm down, but this time you couldn’t. You heard the sound of ripping and then all of a sudden the world around you changed. For one, everything in the room seemed to get smaller, or maybe you got bigger? You were still angry and started lashing out, only to be tackled by something from the side, leading you to smash through the wall of the wooden house. You still didn’t understand what was happening, until you heard them in your head. 

“Y/N CALM DOWN! We know this is scary but you need to calm down.” It was Sams voice. In your head. Or maybe, the voice was coming from the 8ft black wolf hovering over you. You didn’t scream, you didn’t even seem scared, and it’s because you realised, you were a wolf too. 

-Paul’s POV-

Y/N was safe, sleeping soundly in the room next door, or so Paul thought. It wasn’t until he heard the shouting that he knew something was wrong. Leah called for help and before he knew what had happened there was a bang and Sam was tackling a wolf on the ground outside the house. 

A white wolf. Small, slim, bright, with a single grey patch of fur around an eye. Paul shifted instantly, realising the unknown wolf in front of him was in fact his imprint. He let out a low growl to Sam, even though he was the Alpha, Paul didn’t like the fact he’d just tackled his girl. He looked her over, his tongue lolling out the side of his mouth almost comically, all the while Y/N stood staring and the grey wolf now in front of her, he could hear through the bond that she’d just imprinted, feel it too. Now she knew. 

-Your POV-

“Hold the fuck up.” You couldn’t believe what you were hearing. Part of you couldn’t tell if you were in a dream or had just gone plain crazy. The other part of you knew that everything was real but you just couldn’t process the information quick enough. “So you’re telling me, that our ancestors were these shapeshifters and the gene was passed down to us to allow us to shift into giant wolves and hunt down vampires. You know, Vampires, ‘I want to suck you blood’, creepy pale strong immortal beings with no soul? And werewolves, I mean, Shifters..” It was insane. 

“Anddd to top it off, the man i’ve had a crush on since 2nd grade is my imprint, the person I’m supposed to be with for the rest of my life?” You glared at Paul who had the audacity to wink in your direction. Looking around you noticed the other faces, all amused at your outburst. Okay, so this wasn’t a joke, it was some sick reality you were now a part of. You hadn’t looked in Leah’s direction yet, pissed that your best friend had kept such a massive secret from you. Obviously you knew it wasn’t her fault, she wasn’t aloud to tell you the tribes secret, they didn’t know that you would be another female shifter, apparently your kind were rare. It still stung a little. 

“What really sucks thought Y/N, is that you’re gonna have to cut you beautiful hair short, our human hair mimics the length of our wolf hair, hence why each of us one by one cut it all off.” Quil sat back and shrugged and Paul growled lowly, not lowly enough for heightened hearing. 

“Why now. Why. I-I have school and I have things I want to do with my life.. I can’t be a shifter..” Reality had started to sink in and you found it difficult to breath. It felt like everyone in the room was staring at you and it didn’t help that you could also hear what everyone was basically saying. Your chair was pushed back with a screech, falling over and hitting the wooden floor. 

“I-I need to get out of here, I need a minute..” You were out the door in a flash, Leah and the boys running after you. Somewhere in the distance you could make out Sam telling Paul to calm down and then heard what sounded like wolves shifting but you’d already made it to the tree line, being able to run faster than you’d imagined still in your human form. 

The air was colder the higher up you got. You didn’t know how long you’d been running for but it had been a couple of hours before you finally stopped. In the middle of nowhere, high up in the mountains you let out a scream, one that sent flocks of birds fleeing from trees, the notes of your anguish scattering in the breeze. Everything would be changing now, life as you once knew it was gone. Part of yourself would never be yours again, having to follow a pack system. Another part of you was giddy at the thought that the man you’d been in love with your whole life turned out to be the one destined for you all along, it only took shifting into a wolf for you both to realise just how compatible you were.

You’d been alone with your thoughts long enough when you heard a twig snap in the distance. The hairs on your arms stood up and your heart started beating rapidly, turning, you calmed when you noticed a familiar figure walk out into the open. 

“Paul.” You could feel the bond running through your veins, seeing him helped you breath better and the physical need and urge to be in his arms was too strong. Like he sensed it too, he was over to you in a flash, taking you in his arms, your body pressed against his, his nose buried in your hair breathing in your scent, like he was saving it to memory. 

“Y/N, it’s all going to be okay, I promise, nothing bad will ever happen to you while i’m around, I know it seems scary now, but it won’t be like this forever. You’re already so strong, and I’m lucky that fate paired me with you.”

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Yoooo. I hope you liked this chapter, I’ve had some writers block recently, just trying to keep going. I’m still not sure what direction I’m taking this fic, I do know however that this is set at the beginning of eclipse! So watch out for some vampire action!

TagList:

@mariasblogsworld

@rosella26

@punkfrogz

@jjpogueprincess

If you want to be added to this tag list please let me know, sorry if I missed anyone off! <3 Please re-blog/like/follow <3

[jtrbluv]

resolutely, yours. | kth

summary: When your best-friend slash pain-in-your-ass, Kim Seokjin, drags you to a New Year’s Eve party that you didn’t want to go to in the first place, what better way is there to pass the time than to stay sober and watch all your classmates go berserk? Well, that is until Kim Taehyung steps into the picture, of course.

pairing: taehyung x reader

genre: fluff

word count: 2.7k+

warnings: profanity, slight alcohol consumption, implied drug usage (two words only, i swear), college party antics should say enough

A/N: first fic of the year! W O O! this was supposed to be for tae’s birthday but i guess it’s fitting since it is the new year. a special thanks to miss mei @sugacouture for her likeness and @koushiningg aka the eternal hypewoman. this fic (drabble) is rly short but i do have a lot coming up in store! for now, hope u enjoy and happy new year everyone!

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You are going to murder Kim Seokjin.

The spiked punch that fills your red solo cup up to its brim has been waiting to be quaffed down for thirty-seven minutes now. Roughly five minutes before that, Seokjin had somehow managed to drag you through the front doors of the fraternity party he’s been wanting you to accompany him to for weeks now.

And it only takes ten minutes for the proclaimed party animal and people-person, Kim Seokjin, to vanish from your side. He leaves you to fend for yourself in a jungle full of plastered college students—priorities at the moment are to either drink so much liquid regret that they can’t even remember their own names, or to find someone to make out with when the clock strikes at midnight. From simple observation, you notice that most, if not everyone here, fall under both categories.

Well, the exception being you, of course.

One thing to note is that you actually do have a decent tolerance for alcohol. You were no stranger to it, and it would serve as a dutiful companion to you when times called for it. Like last week after your last final that you knew you fucking bombed.

However, the humidity of the room due to the accumulation of bodies that left little to no room for fresh air, in addition to the strong stench of alcohol mixed with sweat mixed with God knows what, just was not the ideal place for you to get wasted. It didn’t stand close in comparison to drinking with a solid group of close friends, or by yourself in the comfort of your bed while a shitty rom-com plays in the background on your laptop.

The atmosphere is suffocating all of your senses— tears pricking at the corners of your eyes due to the strong odor of the room, the curled front pieces of your hair dampening and sticking to your temples, your mouth and throat dry as the Sahara Desert because, of fucking course, there is absolutely no water to be seen.

The small black dress and heels that Seokjin forced you to wear was worsening the situation greatly—your legs practically glued stuck to the stool you were sitting on, leading to ugly red marks and stinging skin if you tried to stand up.

You could not take being inside any longer. Instead of passing out from being piss drunk, you were almost adamant that you were going to pass out from the grueling mix of heat exhaustion and secondhand high.

Your grip on the solo cup significantly tightens, nearly crushing the plastic in half. You quickly stand up from the stool you were sitting in, the sensation akin to getting your legs waxed as you take a deep inhale through your nose, mentally preparing yourself to dive into this sea of financially obligated, depressed monsters.

Peculiarly, you manage to shove your way through a good chunk of the mass, your eyes set on the door that leads towards the balcony. Your ankles almost completely give into your weight a concerning number of times, and if it wasn’t for all of the arms of oblivious partygoers that you had clung onto for dear life, you probably wouldn’t be able to stand on your own two feet by now.

Solely occupied with trying to navigate your way through the crowd, you don’t even realize that someone bumped into you and spilled your drink all over your dress until you reach the balcony. The cold, night breeze passes over your body, leaving chills on the huge wet patch on your dress. The one goddamn time your dress sees the light of day, you just so happen to find a way to ruin it.

“Fucking hell!” You holler into the vacant balcony, your hands coming up to carefully poke at the wet patch on your dress. You wince as the soaked, freezing fabric comes in contact with your bare stomach. Angry, you chug down the rest of the drink inside your cup and chuck it off the balcony, too enraged to even react to its strong taste.

Shivering, you walk deeper onto the balcony, cradling yourself and staring at your shoes, a string of curses spewing from your lips. You scold yourself for not bringing a jacket while simultaneously plotting your revenge against Seokjin. A pair of black loafers intrude your vision, accompanied by a husky voice that calls out to you,

“Oh shit, are you okay?”

Your head shoots up, your eyes meeting the ones of the man standing in front of you. He towers above you significantly despite you wearing heels. His eyes are only a tad obscured by the soft, brown curls of his hair, perfectly styled and gelled to have that ‘purposefully messy’ look. The only difference being that models stood no chance against him when he was the blueprint himself. The black button up he’s clad in exquisitely accentuates every crevice of his lean, chiseled body. And his eyes that were already alluring on their own, were adorn with hazel-colored contacts that you swear you could stare at for hours upon hours. He is so otherworldly beautiful, you temporarily forget to breathe.

And you also forget that you are just staring at him, and he is staring back at you with a smile.

Times like this is when you wish you were at least a little buzzed. Sober ‘you’ is way too socially inept to fend for themself sadly. “O-oh i’m fine, someone just spilled their drink on me.”

Maybe it’s the way the moon sits behind him and casts a halo-like glow around his figure or how he’s just been staring straight into your eyes this whole time, like it’s second nature whilst you can only hold eye contact with him for two seconds before instinctively shying away. To say that his presence frightened you was an understatement. You were about to take cover and hide under the patio table like a five-year-old if he kept looking at you like that.

He blinks, his mouth stretching into a wide grin, rectangular-shaped and having the ability to ease your nerves. He places his drink on a patio table, dusting his hands on his pants, “Here, I’ll get you some napkins, just stay here.”

Stunned, it isn’t until he leaves that you yell out to him as he steps back inside the chaos, “Thank you!”

You carefully sit down on a patio chair, your arms still wrapped around your shivering torso while you try to breathe warm air into your cupped hands.

The man steps out onto the balcony minutes later, his fists full of paper towels as he hands them to you. “Here you go.”

You graciously take them, blotting your dress with the paper towels, your nose scrunching at the scent of alcohol that you had no choice but to inhale. “Thank you so much, really.” You say— still very much shocked to know that chivalry isn't quite dead yet. “It’s Taehyung, right?”

He nods, “Yeah, and you’re Y/N?

Your pause, your hand hovering over your dress as you look up and nod with a forced smile, “No but really, thank you. You didn’t have to.”

“Don’t worry about it, I’m sorry that it happened in the first place,” he says apologetically, as if it was his fault, “it seems like everyone’s already out of their minds, and it isn’t even midnight yet.”

“Hey, don’t apologize,” you assure him, which seems to work because his eyes soften a bit, “besides, I guess it’s my fault for coming here in the first place. I knew something like this was gonna happen and now here I am, smelling like cheap, convenience store vodka.”

He chuckles, and you swear you’ve never been so elated to make someone laugh until now, “I somehow managed to beat the crowd. I’ve literally just been standing out here by myself for a good hour now.”

You sigh in envy, “Must be nice.”

“Too bad you couldn’t make it, it’s been awfully quiet up here.” He says, pivoting on his heel to look at the rest of the empty balcony.

Your eyes trail to the commotion inside the house, the crowd still going strong, “Are we really the only sober ones here?”

He shakes his head, “Nah, we’re just the only ones stupid enough to show up at a college party on New Year’s Eve, expecting to have a good time sober while everyone’s getting plastered.”

The unexpected truth pill causes you to enter a fit of laughter, small clouds of air leaving your mouth every time you exhale. He laughs along with you. “Yeah we are pretty stupid, I do admit.” You concur, while rubbing at your arms that were covered in goosebumps.

“Do you want my jacket?” He asks you while pointing to the black blazer that’s slung on top of the chair next to you.

You wrinkle your nose, “Are you sure?”

“Yes, before I put it on you myself,” he giggles with a roll of his eyes.

Shaking your head, you grab the blazer and wrap it around your shoulders. You stand up from your seat and turn towards him, brow quirked. “A-are you not cold? It’s fucking freezing out here.”

“I’m fine, I swear,” he counters, reaching out to help you slip your arms into his huge jacket sleeves, “I’m also not wearing a sleeveless dress.” He teases, eyeing you up and down as he takes in how oversized his jacket is on you. He thinks it looks much better when you’re wearing it, but he won’t tell you that.

“Right…” you drag out, following his footsteps as he motions you to follow him towards the edge of the balcony.

You two stand next to each other, leaning against the edge, arms nearly brushing against one another.

“So Taehyung, what brings you here in the first place?” You ask, knowing that he seems just as displeased to be here as much as you are.

“I got dragged here by a friend, Park Jimin, in particular.” He responds with a frown, “I have no idea where the fuck he is now, he literally left me as soon as we got here.”

Turning towards him incredulously, your brows raise and the corner of your lip curls into a smirk, “You don’t say.”

Confused, but also curious about the expression painted across your face, he quirks a brow, “Hm?”

You close your mouth, crossing your arms tighter around yourself, “I got dragged here by a friend too. Kim Seokjin. That asshole left me as soon as we got here too.”

He steps back, scoffing in disbelief, “Wow, we really just got stood up by our own friends.” Taehyung proclaims into the vacant balcony, for both him and you— the thought of it sounding even more pathetic after being said out loud.

“They’re pretty goddamn close to losing that title now.” You quip, shaking your head in dismay.

His head rocks back, a lively laugh leaving his lips due to your comment which makes you smile at the fact that you are even able to make him laugh like this.

“Damn it Y/N, you should’ve came out sooner, we could’ve been having a good time out here.” He tells you with a pout as his laughter starts to dwindle.

Sighing heavily, you too, feel regretful about the missed opportunity, “I really should have.”

He nudges you with his elbow, “At least you’re here now.”

The bass-boosted music from inside the house ceases, the room becoming momentarily quieter while someone bellows out, “Hey look, it’s the countdown!”

Everyone’s focus shifts towards the gigantic flat screen TV that hung above the fireplace, making you realize where the fraternity funds truly go to. You and Taehyung exchange glances before shrugging and moving closer to all the commotion since it was New Year’s Eve, above all.

He leans against the doorframe and you stay close to his side, the number ten flashing brightly on the screen—the crowd’s shouts getting louder as it reaches the final ten seconds of the year.

Instead of shouting out the numbers with the rest of the mass, you and Taehyung are simply witnessing it all fold out in silence.

“EIGHT!”

‘You got any New Year’s resolutions?!” You nudge him while attempting to yell over the noise.

His head whips towards you, “Me?!”

“SEVEN!”

Your brows furrow, “Does it look like I’m talking to anyone else?!”

His mouth splits into a grin once more, folding over in laughter just enough to meet eye-to-eye with you.

“SIX!”

“I mean! I didn’t have one originally!”

The crease in your brows dissipate, “Well, what changed?!”

“FIVE!”

His head tilts to the side, “I came here!”

You mirror his head tilt, confused as ever, “Um, so you wanna go to more parties next year?!”

“FOUR!”

He slaps a palm against his forehead, “From what you know about me, does it look like I like parties?!”

“How the hell would I know?!”

His jaw drops, “Y/N—!”

“THREE!”

“—I wanna get to know you better Y/N!”

Your jaw drops as well, “What?! Me?!”

“TWO!”

“Is there any other Y/N standing in front of me?!”

“I– oh...”

“ONE! HAPPY NEW YEAR!” The crowd shouts together in unison despite all being under the influence. A confetti cannon erupts, flying around the room and falling into people’s hair as the mass starts to split into pairs, all partaking in the traditional New Year’s kiss that you personally haven’t had much luck in participating in yourself.

You rip your gaze away to look at Taehyung. He smiles, pulling a piece of confetti out of hair, making your cheeks flush. “Happy New Year, Y/N.”

“Happy New Year, Taehyung.”

The small amount of alcohol you consumed when you first stepped foot onto the balcony leaves you slightly buzzed. Just enough to leave you with the right amount of courage to vouch for the nickname.

You take a daring step towards the man in front of you, “I also have a resolution of my own, Taehyung.”

He takes an even more daring step towards you, having the audacity to lean down— your faces only inches apart. “And what is that, may I ask?”

Grabbing onto the collar of his shirt, you close the gap in between the two of you, locking your lips with his. The kiss isn’t short enough to be a peck but isn’t long enough to be considered making out. You pull away enough to be able to see his face, “Is to get to know you better too.”

He chuckles, “Y/N, your lips taste like spiked punch.”

Pouting, you bump your forehead into his, “All I drank was whatever you saw me have at the balcony, I swear.”

He pecks your nose, your frown immediately wiping away as he does so, “I trust you.”

You smile, giving him a peck on the mouth, “As you should.”

“I’d kiss you again, but you probably can’t stand being here any longer. Let’s get out of here.” He tells you, tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear.

You slide your arm onto his, interlocking his fingers with your own, “I think you’ve already completed your resolution Taehyung. You seem to know me so well already.”

Pushing through the crowd, he hooks an arm onto your waist while he shoves a path for you two to get through, “Too bad I don’t know where you wanna go though.”

You hum, thinking for a moment before your grumbling stomach answers for you, “I’m hungry, let’s go grab burgers or something.”

You don’t see the way Taehyung is fondly staring at you because you’re too busy trying to open the front door. At last, you manage to pry it open, stepping back outside while Taehyung’s holding you in his arms. It’s not that cold this time.

Taehyung’s hands land on both of your shoulders— turning you around to face him as he swiftly latches his lips onto yours. You stumble back, but his hand is quick to support you as he kisses you deeply. You kiss him back, letting your fingers curl around the curls of his hair.

He pulls back this time, letting his forehead rest on yours, “Y/N, I think you are the one that’s completed your resolution. How the hell did you know that I fucking love burgers?”

-

-

MASTERLIST

[katieraven]

sleep is so tough

Summary: your attempt at dealing with losing Bucky is unsuccessful and results in a sleepless night - for several reasons.

Characters: James "Bucky" Barnes/female reader

Warnings: angst!!, happy ending (because I can't write sad endings for the life of me), a lot of metaphors, thoughts about death, loss and grieving, a tiny description of a panic attack

Word count: 3227

Notes: @babycap you wonderful human! 600 followers is huge and i am very happy about this fic. the prompt was: "I wanna be in your touch / Sleep is so tough" - James Bay, Chew On My Heart and I wrote a lil something that i'm kinda happy with. do enjoy!

love,

katie

It’s the same nightmare. You recognise it from the last three weeks, you’ve been here before. Doesn’t make it easier to shake out of it. You watch him convulse, face torn and twisted somewhere between pain and the desperate attempt to keep his free will. The fight against the venomous words the HYDRA agent hurls at him. They’re like daggers, needles stuck into his brain, rewiring him. And all you can do is watch. You are frozen in place in the torture your subconsciousness puts you through. Again. And again. And again.

You can’t will your eyes to tear away from him. He snarls like a cornered animal at the agents around him. Then the final words. “грузовой вагон“. Freight car. You don’t know Russian, but those ten phrases have been burned into your brain. You could recite them in your sleep.

Bucky stills. He slowly stands up from his crouched position, cold stare fixed onto the speaking agent. “Я готов отвечить“.

You startle awake, the nightmare finally loosening its grasp on your consciousness. Immediately, your hands fly to the other side of the bed. It is cold and empty and your stomach drops when realisation hits you like a punch to the gut.

This is not a nightmare. At least not entirely, no. It is a memory. Because you saw the footage. You saw Bucky convulse and bend and snap and straighten. And you saw Steve, heard his scream as Sam pulled him away, forcing him to leave his best friend in the hands of his torturers. Steve knows it was the right thing to do. You do, too. The thought of Bucky being all alone behind enemy lines still makes your breath hitch in your throat, though.

They didn’t want you to see the footage, it wasn’t supposed to be something you get confronted with. But you slipped into the room, originally meaning to talk to Natasha about some software to try out in the next mission. They didn’t notice you entering, eyes trained on a screen, FRIDAY running facial recognition in the background. They kept playing the footage over, and over, and over, and again, looking for any kind of clue as to where they could find him, until your knees gave out under you and you fell with a whimper leaving your throat. Natasha was the first to understand the situation. Steve let out a string of colourful curses you would have never stopped teasing him about, hadn’t you been trying to wrap your mind around what you just saw.

If you had known they were back already, you would have noticed him missing and asked. But you didn’t even know they were back. And then he was gone.

You finally open your eyes. The New York night tints the white ceiling a blueish sort of grey and you feel like someone painted the inside of your heart onto the concrete. A perfect replica. Grey inside. Empty. Broken and alone, left to try and fail to put yourself back together.

Your fingers curl into a fist around the cold and empty bedsheets. They have been empty for three weeks now, and your body has no tears left to give. So you lie there, silent sobs violently breaking free from the void that is your chest. Sometimes you don’t know if your heart is beating, still, and your hands can’t find it in them to check. It wouldn’t be so bad to die, you think. There’s not much keeping you here.

Steve visits every few days. He carries the same hollow look in his eyes, like someone snuffed out the light behind them and carelessly forgot to turn it back on. With the sole difference that he is better at hiding it. It is only when he thinks nobody is watching that the sticky navy blue ink that is grief seeps into his face and turns his eyes empty and his face pale. You don’t mention it.

You know it’s supposed to help, sharing grief. Which is why you open the door when he visits, and don’t turn him away. He needs it, too, you suppose. So you sit on your sofa in front of the tv and watch something stupid and mindless that none of you pay attention to and both of you pretend to find acutely intriguing whenever the other is looking.

It’s all a giant game of pretend. SHIELD is feigning confidence in finding him. Everyone else oozes positivity whenever they talk about the mission. But it’s false, and hollow, and the truth of it sneers at you through translucent optimism.

You turn your head to look at the alarm clock on your bedside table. 4:36 a.m. That means you slept an astonishing three hours. That’s two more than yesterday. You’re not afraid of the nightmares anymore. You know they will come. The terror shaking you night after night has become a companion, just as the grief following closely in everything you do. It looms over you at night, hides in the shadows behind the furniture in your living room, joined by Steve’s whenever he’s there.

You were afraid to fall asleep, yes. Pulled two all-nighters in the first days after. By now you have learned to read the signs your body so openly presents you with and you know you will not fall asleep again tonight. So you lie there, hand splayed over the empty right side of the bed, eyes staring through the ceiling.

Fuck, you miss him. It rolls over you unexpectedly and your body seizes, curling up into a fetal position as your obviously alive and beating heart pumps sharp agony through your veins. He is gone. You know, of course, you understood before and this feeling is familiar, but for the first time, it truly settles inside you. Bucky is gone.

The man you imagined a future with, who handed you his broken and bruised heart and trusted you to fix it, is gone. The charming wooden home near the sea you always talked about when his nightmares were too much and too real slowly turns to dust between your grasping fingers. You feel it slip. The bell-like high pitched laughter of a young child evaporating in your mind.

You feel your heart break. There has been a dull ache in your chest for weeks. You’ve gotten used to it, embraced it into your menagerie of demons and ghosts, grief and loss. But it betrays you, right now, as you feel your heart pound against the cage of your ribs, and it burns. You still lie curled into yourself, blanket tangled between your legs. You will explode. You feel it with a new certainty, this will kill you. You breathe in and out, you know you do, but none of the air arrives in your lungs. It leaves you desperately gasping for oxygen.

Until you realise none of it is real. Because your heart is not here in your room with you, your heart lies in the mismatched hands of a broken soldier somewhere between here and the sea. It can’t kill you here, because there is an organ-sized hole in your chest and the coldness of the world tears at your exposed ribcage with icy shrapnel-sharp claws. Does it bleed? If so, you can’t feel the warmth. Blood is warm, right? Bucky always said it is.

You exhale slowly. Will your seizing muscles to relax, to let you go. To your surprise they do, and you inhale again, cold night air. It doesn’t yet escape through the wound in your chest. The hole hasn’t reached your lungs yet. But you know it will consume you, leave no part of you untouched, unbroken, will rip you apart for all your demons to finally feast on what is left of you.

Maybe he will find you first, you muse. Maybe HYDRA will find the last bit of mercy in them and send him after you, to cut his strings. You know you will not fight when he does. It would be a sweet oblivion with his eyes the last thing you see. Grey irises like molten silver when the sunlight hits just right.

Your arms fold against your chest. The skin is whole, not a scratch, no bleeding wound. You know it can’t be true. It is simply your minds way of processing this pain. Your imagination fixed the hole but you know it’s still there, still gaping. You can feel the edges burning where the hole ends and the marred skin starts. But you live. Still this broken body carries you on, one day after another.

You sit up in your sheets, hair plastered against your forehead by the thin film of sweat covering your body. As your back straightens, the metallic clinking of dog tags root you into this reality and you pull them out from under one of Bucky’s black shirts you’re wearing.

“Keep these,” he murmurs and presses something hard into your open palm. You look down and see the two thin pieces of metal piled on top of each other, embossed letters spelling his name, his full name. Your stunned eyes flicker back up into his and you open your mouth to protest, but he shushes you with a finger.

“It’s not like I need them. If I die, this thing” – he gestures to his arm – “will tell everyone who I am. But I want you to have these.”

Your thumb smoothes over the plates, shoving them against each other. “I mean … I won’t complain, but why do you …?”

He shrugs, embarrassment tinting his cheeks. “I don’t know, I guess it feels like a part of me stays with you, y’know? A physical part. So that you have something real to hold onto until I’m back.”

It hits you, then, that he’s leaving. He picks the tags up and puts them around your neck and you reach for his hands, fingers closing around his forearms. “Don’t leave me, Bucky. Please, I can’t lose you –“

He puts his hands on either side of your face and kisses your nose, before looking directly at you. “You won’t lose me, you hear? I’ll always be with you. Always.”

But now he’s gone, and you close your fist around the metal tags until they push into your palms, and harder until they cut the delicate skin. You want to be angry at him but you can’t. It’s not his fault. It’s not his fault he couldn’t keep his promise.

You steady your breathing. Eyes wander to the red numbers on your alarm. 5:23. No use trying to sleep anymore, you decide, and sit up. Might as well make coffee. Maybe you can get something done today. Clean the laundry up at least, so Steve doesn’t have this awfully concerned look on his face next time he visits.

It takes you a couple of minutes to actually, physically, move. In your mind you’re already in the kitchen, filling the coffee maker with water and watching the coffee slowly dribble into the pot below. It has something therapeutic, one drop at a time. Almost meditative.

But, well, you do have to walk over into the kitchen to reach this point of short-lived meditative oblivion. So you swing your legs over the edge of the bed, and your eyes fall onto the covered mirror in the corner. It’s floor-length, and you used to love being able to admire your whole outfit in there without having to stand on your tiptoes.

Like that one time before one of Tony’s extravagant galas, when you tried to get a good look at yourself and the glamourous dress that, as Natasha had pointed out, would look amazing on your figure. She had been right – naturally. But the tiny mirror in your bathroom hadn’t shown the whole thing and so you were leaning over the sink to try and look. Which was exactly the moment Bucky chose to walk into the room, only to promptly wear an affectionately amused smirk on his face, assuring you of your otherworldly beauty (“Oh come on, Buck, don’t mock me – “ “I’m not, you are otherworldly, doll, dazzling even!”) and pointing out that you were in desperate need of a floor-length mirror.

In the first few days of Bucky’s absence, you hung a bedsheet over it because you couldn’t bear the memory. In fact, you can’t recall the last time you actually looked at yourself. With utmost certainty, though, you can say that your skin must be grey and sunken and the darkened circles under your eyes a deeper shade of purple than when you were knee-deep in college finals. God, that time seems ages away. If you hadn’t gone to college then maybe you wouldn’t be in this situation – you would have certainly never ended up at SHIELD. For a second you wish you hadn’t. This pain would not be part of your reality, then.

But then again, you wouldn’t have met him at all. And as much as this, right now, hurts, you wouldn’t trade it with any reality in the universe if it meant not knowing him. Not loving him. Not knowing his deepest, darkest secrets that he only opened up about after one particularly bad nightmare, with his head in your lap, not daring to meet your eyes.

No, if this pain is the price for his love then you will take it. You will let it eat at you until there is nothing left except your hollowed shell of a body because it will have been worth it.

You walk past the covered mirror and open the door, bare feet against the cold kitchen floor. You go to reach for the coffee maker when something registers with you. Something out of place, a slight inconsistency in your regulated, never-changing surroundings. You barely see it in your periphery.

Your movements still and your head slowly turns toward what is undoubtedly someone sitting in your living room. The moonlight glints on his left shoulder and you realise, within the smallest fractions of a second, who it is.

The hollow excuse for a heart that sits in your chest sputters and stills, before springing back into action twice as fast. He came back.

A steady stillness settles over you as you understand the situation. They sent him. Loose ends and all. Yet you’re not afraid, this death will be quick and quiet. It gives you an odd sensation of peace, to know that his will be the last face you see – even if it is the Winter Soldier’s face. But they’re still Bucky’s eyes.

“It’s okay”, you whisper.

His intent gaze never leaves you as you slowly, deliberately walk towards him, step by step. You know that Bucky is in there, too, and you need him to understand that you accept this. That it is not his fault. That you are ready to die if it is at his hands.

There is an unusual uncertainty in the Soldier’s eyes. You have seen footage of him, cold expression, a sort of stone-hearted efficiency about his movements, never a step too much. He has not moved yet. You feel every bit of skin on your feet connecting to the wooden floor as you move towards him, slowly, but steadily. If this is how you are meant to go, then you will.

You’re only three feet away from him as you stop. His eyes followed you all the way there. Now they start to flicker over your face, your body, confusion slowly but definitely showing in the crinkles on his forehead. He opens his mouth and you hold your breath.

“I –“, it comes out croaky, like he hasn’t used his voice in forever, so he clears his throat and starts again.

“I know you.”

Your lungs deflate, shakily. He hasn’t killed you yet. If he hasn’t killed you yet, why is he here? The Winter Soldier doesn’t hesitate. The uncertainty in his face sparks something deep, deep inside of you that you thought dead by now. Hope.

His eyes find their way back to your face and he is searching it now, not the stoic, cold mask of the Winter Soldier. You don’t dare speak. The fingers of his left hand flex with an electric whirr.

“I know you, but …” he trails off.

His right fist opens, fingers seemingly involuntarily reaching out. You step closer and lower yourself down, bare knees on the wood flooring, eyes not leaving his.

“I remember you.”

His voice is steadier now, more confident that he does, in fact, know you. That there is something inside his brain, something more than just the Soldier. More than just the missions. Just the trigger.

His hand, the real one, reaches towards your face and you close your eyes upon contact, a shaky breath leaving your lips. His index and middle finger trail across your cheekbone. Follow the curve of your lips. Trace your eyebrows. Your eyes flicker open and your breath gets caught in your throat because there he is, there he is, his eyes his own.

“Bucky –“

His name leaves your lips, a choked sob partially escaping. He blinks. Still, his eyes are his own. His lips part and then he whispers your name and you are certain this is a dream. A change of pace from the violent nightmares of late, but still a dream, because this can’t be true. How could it be.

But the hardwood floor is rough against your knees and his hand is warm against your cheek and he is there. He slides off the chair onto the ground before you and you feel hot tears spill from your open, disbelieving eyes. His other hand reaches for your face and then he’s holding you there, so unbelievably gentle, his eyes tortured and lined in purple but undeniably his own.

“You came back”, is the first real thing you say to him.

His thumb smoothes over the dark bruise under your eye, proof of sleepless nights and tired days.

“I’m so sorry”, is the first thing he says to you in his own voice.

You close your eyes, lids pushing tears over the edge and you let them drip down onto your bare thighs as you shake your head, a soft smile on your lips.

“There is nothing you need to be sorry about. None of this was your fault.”

“I – you’re hurt”, he states, matter-of-factly, and your eyes open again.

You try and put everything into your eyes, everything you feel, the hope, the relief, the love. Most of all the love.

“But you’re back. That’s all that matters. Do you hear me?”

His grey irises swim with regret and pain and fear and yet you see love in them. You gently touch your forehead to his and he sighs, eyelids fluttering closed.

“I love you, and you’re back, and that’s all that matters.”

The cold seeps into your body from the floor, your knees scraping against the hardwood. Neither of you dares to move, the calm of the situation too delicate, neither sure if this is real or just a particularly cruel dream. But it is too beautiful to disturb and so both of you remain where you are, hands gently touching the other. Thankful for this moment of peace.

**

Forgot my taglist consisting of one wonderful person: @mannien