#just me talking about my characters in WoW
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art & patrick at mark rebellato academy
[headcanons]
notes: i really enjoyed writing this because i just genuinely adore these characters and this movie so much. there's so many interesting little details and nuances there that i could just talk about forever and ever. i truly hope i did them justice here lol (also writing this made me jealous of people that are good at writing character analysis' and thinkpieces bc wow it is hard!) but yeah enjoy!
wordcount: 3.4k
they met at age 12 during their first day at the mark rebellato academy in their now shared room.
when art came in with a duffel bag (that looked comically big next to his scrawny kid body) patrick was already sitting on the bed he had claimed(the right side next to the door) all by himself, his parents didn't have a very tearful nor long goodbye as they sent their son off to boarding school.
in contrast art’s mom and grandma seemed keen to embarrass him in front of his new roommate with their cooing and hugging him goodbye.
it wasn't even like his mom and him were really all that close though. she just seemed to want to squeeze in all the moments of a loving mother-son relationship into the small segments of time she actually spent with him.
the goodbye hug and small ruffle of his hair from his grandma felt a little more genuine. embarrassing all the same as he could feel the other dark haired boy try not to crack up at the display.
"mom. please." he pleaded with her as she gave him a kiss on the cheek. "i’m sorry, artie, but i need to make up for all the time i'm gonna miss with you!" yeah, he bets.
a few minutes later and a tear or two from his mother they did finally leave him be. as soon as he heard the door shut though, the awkward silence enveloping the room almost made him miss them.
he threw his duffel bag on the left bed and sat down on the edge. he fidgeted with his bottom lip, a nervous habit he's had for as long as he could remember.
the brunette boy shifted on the bed so he was now facing him. his mouth pulled into a toothy grin "so you're...artie?"
art groaned and hid his head in his hands, slumped over his knees. "no, that's..just my moms nickname for me. sorry you had to see that." he says in a squeaky broken voice which didn't help the embarrassment he was already feeling.
the other boy just brushed right past all that and said "i’m patrick." and then as an afterthought, "zweig."
"uh." art leaned back up, still avoiding his gaze. it was weirdly intense. "yeah, i’m..art. um, donaldson." he said the last part like it was a question almost.
patrick began to swing his legs a little. it was clear to him that art was the quiet type even if they had just exchanged a few words so far, but luckily patrick didn't mind talking. it was something his father always hated about him. he almost talked enough for both of them which after a little while finally seemed to break the ice of art's shy exterior.
art didnt know what he thought about patrick yet. he was pretty..confident that was for sure. even a little arrogant, maybe. art scolded himself internally for being so judgemental. it was quality he hated about himself, but seemingly couldn’t get rid of.
despite all of that he had to admit that patrick was easy to talk to. there was never an uncomfortable gap in conversation with him. which art liked since those kinds of things made him want to crawl out of his skin sometimes.
that first night he spent staying up with patrick, slowly realizing how much they had in common while simultaneously being complete opposites, is one of his fondest memories and probably always will be. he never experienced another connection that felt anything even close to that.
their room wasn't too small but with the way patrick would just constantly toss his clothes wherever he pleased it seemed a lot smaller.
it's not like art was insanely neat or anything, he was still a teenage boy. patrick was just exceptionally messy.
"patrick, this shit is so gross, i told you to use the hamper."
patrick groaned, "youre such a neatfreak, fuck off."
at that response a pair of dirty boxers were thrown at his head, courtesy of art. "i don't want to see or smell your worn underwear. that doesn't make me a neatfreak."
patrick just tossed it back in art’s direction, to which the blonde quickly scurried out of the way to dodge it like his life depended on it.
"you know if tennis doesn't work out for you, you'll make a good housewife." patrick grinned mockingly.
“ha-ha.” art just rolled his eyes, stuck up his middle finger and let the door slam behind him with his racket bag slung over his shoulder.
trying to get patrick to do anything was like trying to teach a cat to do a trick without any treats. borderline impossible. so by age 15 art finally gave up.
...until he realized a year later that patrick would clean his side of the room whenever they had a girl over so..
yeah, sometimes he did lie and tell patrick that a girl was coming over just so he would clean his side of the room.
you can judge him all you want but you never had to room with patrick zweig
and after the third time that trick stopped working anyway. art was never a good liar. or maybe patrick could just call his bullshit way too easily.
they didn't fight too often, it was more like they constantly got into little tiffs
except for that time where it got so out of hand that they duct-taped a line dividing their rooms into two sides. (i know this is giving sitcom i'm sorry but tell me i'm wrong)
eventually they kind of forgot what they even fought about in the first place but they were too lazy to take the tape off of the carpet, so it just stayed on there for like 2 years till it peeled off.
like i mentioned in my other post these two were BITCHES
they would def talk shit all the time. they were not even trying to be secret about it tbh. (see: them staring at anna crying at tashi's party)
they sat in the bleachers watching one of their classmates play a practice match
“dude, look at that forehand. it sucks.” art muttered. patrick nodded, “i know. no way she’ll even make it through the semester.” “i’ll be surprised if she makes it through this match without fracturing her wrist.” patrick snickered at art’s comment.
actual mean girls LMAO
and to be fair, they were fucking amazing at tennis, especially when they played together
so it's not like anyone could necessarily insult them back
but it also wasn't bullying or anything
they were just judgy and loved to talk shit
art had some decorum about it or felt bad about it sometimes. not patrick though.
man has no shame. never did. as art so lovingly puts it “the part of his brain that feels shame withered away a long time ago.”
art wore glasses from ages 12 till 14
he then switched to contact lenses because patrick said girls dont like guys with glasses and that they make him look nerdy
they weren't allowed to have any sort of electronics like computers or flip phones at the academy. not even mp3 players.
now obviously patrick completely ignored that rule. he had like three flip phones under his bed in case his actual one ever got taken (it did)
he also smuggled in 2 mp3 players (one was for art, patrick is so kind… he did charge him 4 dollars for it though. that rich asshole. lmao)
honestly i would like to insert here what i think they would have listened to but..i was like..a baby when they wouldve been at the academy so..feel free to drop your music headcanons in the reblogs or comments
they were only allowed one weekly call to their families from the communal landline.
neither patrick nor art were very fond of these calls so even though they weren't supposed to they would always go into the phone room together.
patricks mother always insisted on speaking in german with her son. he thought she only did it because it made her feel more connected to his father’s side of the family. not like it would fix their fucked up marriage though.
“nein, mama, ich habe mein deutsch nicht vergessen.” (no, mom, i havent forgotten my german) he sighs. art sits on the floor next to him and flicks a rubber band at him. “ja, verstanden. ja, ich weiß.” (yes, understood. yes, i know.) he rolls his eyes.
art understood a few of the basic words since patrick taught him some german after art asked how to correctly pronounce his last name.
“..bis nächste woche. tschüss.” (talk to you next week. bye.) he hung up. his mom said i love you but he knew she didn't mean it so he didn't say it back.
patrick groaned and stretched out his legs that were seemingly getting longer by the day (art secretly prayed for a growth spurt that would make him taller than patrick. right now he was still pretty short for a guy his age.)
he handed the phone to art. “she always talks so much. it's like i'm not even on the other line.” patrick scowls. art just nodded. he knew that by now.
art called his grandma but his dad picked up instead. it was okay. talking to his dad felt a little like talking to some distant uncle that he only saw once a year, “how's it going, champ?” “good.” “great.” that kinda stuff
the phone call lasted 5 minutes. he stood up and hung the phone back on the receiver.
“wanna smoke?” patrick asked already reaching for the two loose cigarettes stuffed into his jean shorts pocket.
art nodded. he didn't really like smoking, and he kind of only did it because patrick did. and whenever he did, all he could think about was how bad for him it was.
he was always pretty conscious about that kinda stuff, it was a little drilled into him by his dad who was the most adamant about art becoming a tennis player since he used to be one when he was younger.
so sugar and fats (basically anything that tasted good) were pretty much banned in the donaldson household
which kind of resulted in art subconsciously believing that anything that brought him joy or pleasure must be inherently bad for him or followed by a feeling of guilt and shame to make up for it.
needless to say art wasn't the best at indulging. he was a little jealous of how patrick never seemed to have any issue with that sort of thing.
patrick didn't care about maintaining a good diet or depriving himself of life's pleasures for the sake of tennis. he took what he wanted like life owed it to him.
maybe that's why he smoked with patrick. to try and be more like him?
also because it gave him a nice sense of rebellion.
most things he did with patrick gave him that feeling.
at the academy they were the definition of ‘not sold separately’
if you saw one the other wasn't far behind
its not like they didn't have other friends. they did. they were pretty popular actually
but none of those friendships were anything like what art and patrick had.
especially when playing doubles.
it felt like they could communicate telepathically
patrick knew when art was going for the ball before the other team even served and vice versa.
tennis felt different when they were playing together. better.
and it felt so easy, it felt like nothing they needed to work on. their friendship was the same. it was so easy, so natural.
after about a year or so of being friends they started being in sync. literally.
they cross their legs at the same time, they pick up their rackets at the same time, they adjust their forehand grip at the same time, they walk at the same pace, they sit down the same etc etc you get it
also that isn't really a headcanon, like this is canon in the movie. and it makes me SICK that they were still in sync in 2019. after not talking for 12 years. shut up that’s some soulmate shit
now let's talk about something else that is canon…the pushed together beds.
yes!
now, i think patrick is a person that is pretty open with his body in general in terms of like being physically affectionate. or just being physical.
i don't know if art is, i think he's a little more reserved. (repressed if you will! i will!)
but patrick touching him so casually does fill a little tiny (gaping) void in him that yearns for touch.
he is a professional yearner as we all know
and patrick never had an issue satisfying those yearnings for him. (i think we saw that in the fact that patrick taught art how to jerk off ok next topic)
patrick would sling his arm around his shoulder, lay his long legs over arts lap, ruffle arts curls (“stop that, you're messing them up.” “no, i'm not they always look like this”),he would barge into their room after practice flopping his tall sweaty body on top of art to annoy him.
they were very physically affectionate it was just all under the guise of shoving and tripping each other and just general teenage boy roughhousing shenanigans. that counts as a love language to me ok!
art got used to patrick touching him very quick and even reciprocated sometimes
also i do think that sometimes patrick would smack art’s ass as a joke. lol. (that's inspired by that video of the two doubles players doing that…do you guys know what i’m talking about)
OK SO!
the beds.
they were 16. patrick suggested it. “these beds are too fucking small.” he complained, laying on his staring at the smoke detector that he had covered with a shower cap so it wouldnt detect the smoke from his cigarettes.
and to be fair…yeah. patrick stood at 1,80 cm right now and his feet were hanging over the edge of the bed.
art looked up from his book which he was only reading to impress a girl he had a crush on. patrick had told him to just pretend he read it but art said that was disingenuous and he wanted to know what she liked and why she liked it.
“you know what we should do? we should push our beds together.” patrick sat up, grinning like he just had the best idea ever.
arts features twisted up in thought. “isn't that a little close?”
“nah, why, we still have our own beds. just more space.” patrick shrugged.
he glanced at their beds. “uhhh…i guess we can do that. the beds are a little cramped. although is that even allowed?” art began fidgeting with his lip like he usually did when he was in thought.
but patrick was already in the process of shoving his bed next to arts after which he let himself fall onto the two beds in a starfish position, with his gangly limbs almost stretching to every corner of the beds. “oh. great. and i’ll just curl up at the foot of the bed then?” art gave patrick a deadpan stare.
“up to you.” patrick grinned in that specific way that really irked art.
patrick did make some space for him once they actually went to sleep that night
even now they were two opposites making a whole
patrick always ran cold so he hogged all the blankets and art always ran hot so he immediately kicked them off of him as soon as he fell asleep
that only made this new pushed together beds thing even better for patrick because he now got to have his own blanket AND steal arts every night
i wouldn't say they cuddled necessarily? i think it was more just like the regular amount of physical touching that happens when you sleep in the same bed
which is still pretty intimate to me idk about you guys
like their legs kind of thrown over each others, art’s arm occasionally draped over patricks chest (or literally on his face. art denies every time that he does it on purpose but patrick KNOWS he does it to annoy him. he knows.)
one time art had a nightmare of being trapped under a rock only to wake up and find out that somehow patrick had rolled over in the middle of the night and was now laying COMPLETELY on top of art. right before he was about to push him off (because he was making art actively suffocate) patrick rolled over again and fell out of bed. he didn't even wake up from that. genuinely just slept on the floor that night. freak of nature that guy.
also patrick for sure twitches like a dog in his sleep
and i think it used to wake art up because he's a pretty light sleeper but eventually he just got used to it lol
when art went to stanford he never finished the last bite of anything he ate because he was so used to patrick being next to him and just stealing the last bite.
patrick really really wanted to get his ears pierced when he was 15.
so naturally he asked art to do it for him.
you know…like how they did it in the parent trap. which if you asked them is a movie that they definitely haven't seen. ( but they did see it and art cried at the twins reuniting with their parents, oops.)
unfortunately for patrick art was very very squeamish with needles at that age (i think that mellowed down the older he got but he still refused to look whenever he got vaccinations or anything like that.)
so now it was midnight, they were in their room sitting on the floor and arguing
“dude, just do it, stop being such a wuss. you're not even the one getting pierced.” patrick groaned, he had numbed his earlobe with ice but he could already feel a little bit of the feeling return to it, that's how long they had been sitting there with art squirming around because he hated even looking at the sewing needle.
“that's worse though because i have to look at the needle going in your ear!” art argued
“ well, i can't do it myself.” patrick replied.
...
“are you wearing my shirt?” art squinted at him
“stop trying to change the subject.”
“i told you to stop stealing my clothes. i don't want to do laundry that often.”
“can you focus?” patrick groaned
“dude.. okay, fine. just give me a second.” art took a deep breath.
“oh. my god. you're not performing open heart surgery.”
“shut the fuck up.”
“you shut the fuck up.”
and what do you know that response got art to get over his fear of needles for a second and stab that thing right through his best friends ear
the little high pitched yelp patrick let out in surprise at that is something art didn't let him forget about for like two weeks after
it took about another hour for art to pierce patricks second ear and eventually they managed but then like a week later patrick forgot to put his earrings in and the piercings immediately grew shut
so all that drama was for nothing!
i think art has always kind of been the type of guy to want domesticity.
i already posted about this somewhere but i kind of came to that conclusion because patrick said “he wants to spend time with his family” to tashi in the alley scene
patrick hadn’t spoken to art for like a decade at that point
and you could say it's a good guess but NO!
patrick knows art like the back of his hand and patrick knows that art has always wanted a family and how much it probably kills him to miss out on time with them due to his career at that point in time (also just throwing this out there i think art always wanted to have a daughter more than a son, like that just makes sense to me. maybe bc i think his own relationship with his dad is so distant? idk!)
so yeah
also the sauna scene where patrick says that marriage isn't what he was for
(to me) also implies that he is the opposite of art who was meant for marriage
anyway do i think that art shared his wishes for a family and marriage in the future with patrick? yes
do i think patrick jokingly made art promise to make him his best man? yeah
and furthermore do i think about the fact that patrick then had to read about arts wedding in some tabloid years later? yep!
i’m sure i could think of more in the future but that's all i've got for now! i hope this was coherent enough to enjoy because it’s not as proofread as my fics usually are lol! i just wanted to get these thoughts out there
if some of these seem familiar it might be because i took some of these from my twt!
i also have some more headcanons floating around on my tumblr that i didn't include here if you want to find those, or not, i'm not your mom!
#challengers#art donaldson#patrick zweig#artrick#challengers fanfic#challengers headcanons#challengers fic#ames writes~!
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With a bit of distance, I can actually see one consistent flaw in Tommy's character that we as fans completely missed out on and that is him being a very self-centred person. I'm not saying he's selfish because we have clearly seen in both s7 and s8 that he does turn up for other people - at the very beginning with the cruise ship, then for Buck (especially in 8.05) and he is definitely not in firefighting for the clout.
What I mean is that from the very beginning, he seems incapable or should I say, unwilling to go past his own experiences and hurts. We could take the first date into account (not a lot because he was a bit valid there) where he wrote off Buck, immediately assuming he was not ready. I don't think they say it clearly and I don't have the energy to go and check but it is implied that he has experienced this, whether in himself or in a previous partner.
We see this flaw come back again in the dinner scene where while Buck is talking about Bobby and his issues with his father, he falls back on his own experience again. I don't think he was doing it out of malice or in order to take away Buck's moment, but he genuinely couldn't seem to empathise with it without looking through the lens of his own relationship with his father and with Gerard.
The grand climax of this flaw came out this episode where in the beginning, he is extremely flippant towards what he did to Abby. He is focused entirely on how hard living the lie was for him, so much so, it doesn't seem to even clock for him that his self-preservation tactics hurt a woman so much. This again comes back in the break-up scene where the moment he considers himself under threat, he pulls back completely. He again writes off Buck, telling him basically there is no way you aren't breaking my heart because that is what my experiences tell me is about to happen. He doesn't even really wait to see where Buck is coming from or have a conversation about it. He puts words in Buck's mouth, says of course this is the only way it goes and then practically runs away from there.
I'm not saying all this to portray Tommy as a bad person but more as a flawed person which actually makes me like him more because I can't help but wonder why he is like the way he is. Is it innate? Has he always been like this but has never had anyone call him out on his bullshit? Is it something he made a conscious decision to do because he felt like no one else was putting his feelings first? is he not over his past the way he pretends to be? it also makes me sad because if played out differently, we could have had so much fun with it because Buck is completely opposite to him in this regard and down the line, if they couldn't make it work, it would have been a great moment of personal growth for Buck (again) as well where he would learn to put his hurts first.
[and wow, I think I just played myself because I am a little more obsessed with Tommy than I was before writing this out]
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Camus character analysis: games VS anime
If you finished the Uta no Prince-sama anime and your opinion of this man is "wow, he's kinda terrible," I don't blame you. in fact I've seen a lot of people say this
In this post, I want to talk about his characterization in the games and give my two cents on what the anime was trying to do with him, especially in his single focus episode Saintly Territory (S3E6).
Disclaimer: I wrote this on a whim because I'm sick and stuck at home so if anyone reads this, sorry I might go all over the place
Spoilers for all of the games!
The "be my slave" thing
Starting with Anime Camus's most egregious crime: treating Haruka like a servant/slave (however you want to translate it)
Basically in his focus episode, Haruka is tasked with writing a song for Camus. She wants to learn more about him in order to write it, but Camus will only let her follow him if she acts as his servant. She accepts without complaining, Cecil is rightfully angry, Haruka continues anyway and the song gets completed.
Now, am I about to say that Game Camus would never do this? No because he literally does lmao.
The anime doesn't pull this "servant" plotline out of nowhere, here's the context in his route:
Haruka accidentally overhears Camus talking about a plot to assassinate Saotome on the phone. When he notices that she heard everything, he basically tells her that he has to kill her now. But if she served him, he'd be able to keep an eye on her, make sure she doesn't leak anything, so she could escape death.
Okay uh "work under me or DIE" isn't exactly better, nor is it a good start to a love story, but I'm not finished!!
(A side note: I have to add that the anime made him look like an even bigger asshole and borderline dumb when it came to the things he made her do. Like he expected her to know that snapping your fingers means you want coffee without prior explanation. bro
^This might have been for comedic effect but I promise he can be actually funny and endearing.)
What the anime couldn't cover
The Camus episode wraps up with Haruka pulling through and writing a song that makes Camus "sincere," he says it's cool at the very end and that's the episode. I think the problem is that we technically didn't see him being sincere or what that even means to him, besides when he was singing (banger song btw)
It's a shame because in a 20-minute episode you really can't show the game experience of slowly piecing together what this man's problem is.
First of all, in Debut and AS you'll be quick to notice that he always has homeland and duty on the mind, constantly reminding himself that he's in Shining Agency/Japan for a reason, and it's NOT to have fun or make friends
The truth is, he slowly starts to appreciate the banter with his colleagues, music, and working there in general.
But because of his initial mindset, he has to rationalize & justify every connection he forms, like "it's just for work" or worse: "actually it was ALL A LIE and I NEVER ENJOYED A SECOND OF THE TIME WE SPENT TOGETHER, I'm such a great actor haha"
He uses that to fool himself and to push the other person away so it doesn't happen again. This scene is probably the best example:
(I'll be using google lens because it's faster but I checked that the tls were okay)
He also does this in the Non-Fiction drama, which may or may not have actually happened, but I think it's still a pretty good reflection of what could happen in reality because he tells Ranmaru their bond was a lie, then mopes around in his guilt thinking about the good times and wondering why he's sad, and THEN later doubles down on the "it was a lie, I don't care about you" because he just can't let himself get attached to anything.
Basically, he's terrified at the thought of forming actual bonds because he genuinely thinks he's nothing if he stops being a cold weapon:
At one point he does admit he sucks (as a love interest)-
-which is pretty huge by utapri standards. I love these games, but the amount of times where a male lead does something icky, and everyone, including Haruka, acts like it's normal or like it's Haruka's fault is ehhh but I digress
Upbringing
Of course he's very proud of his homeland and status, but sometimes it's to the point of thinking he can't be anything other than his title. So why is he like this?
We got to hear about his childhood from Camus himself a few times, and it often ended with Haruka thinking "wait? that's kinda messed up?" and Camus insisting it's nothing/it's normal so yeah that's something...
His parents were in an unhappy arranged marriage, and his mother was forced to birth an heir which traumatized her so much that she can't see Camus without falling ill. Overall it's a pretty tragic situation since what happened to her was horrible, though not Camus's fault either. Even now she refuses to see him, and I wouldn't say that makes him sad because he never really met her, but simply knowing of her sacrifice probably adds a lot of pressure. As in, he only exists for this one purpose (inheriting his father's title and serving the country), so if he doesn't play his part correctly, it would have all been for nothing.
He was raised by his father not as a child or son but as the heir, always treated and judged as an adult (even during physical training apparently, make of that what you will)
When Haruka asks about childhood memories he has a very hard time finding something that doesn't have to do with his duties or the nation. And then admits he didn't truly have a "childhood" since he was never treated like a child
As for the queen, I think his love for her is sincere: she taught him a lot of things growing up, and according to him, she's also a victim trapped by her duties so he wants to ease the burden.
So hypothetically, if he found things or people that made him happy in Japan, he would feel obligated to lock them away because that happiness is incompatible with his life: he'll have to leave when his mission ends, he shouldn't be spending time on things that aren't "useful" as he doesn't have the free will to pursue them
In his mind he's completely tied down by the fact that he was born and raised for a single reason, and the fact that he does want to serve the queen.
(This is Saotome describing him btw)
Also it might sound ridiculous to bring his self-worth into question because of how pretentious he is, but I've counted a few situations where he seemed to have complete disregard for his own life, only worrying about Haruka and Cecil's safety in scenes when they were present. And he thinks wanting to be loved unconditionally is a childish thought he shouldn't have.
"Double Face" was a lie. There's like at least 10 layers
On the surface he does have two personas, his perfect polite butler act for the media, and his cold bitchy attitude off camera. But honestly, even when he's not acting as a butler, he's often putting up a front to hide any form of vulnerability (from himself as well)
His main struggle is finding who he is outside of what he's being told to do. Before, he never actually stopped to think about what he WANTS because it just never occurs to him, or if it does he ignores it.
That's why realizing that he has his own desires is essential to his character development, and him staying with Quartet Night (and Haruka in his routes) is so important. It's why Reiji feels the need to reach out and when he does, Camus either freezes up or tears up;
This all makes him the opposite of Ranmaru (being true to yourself and sincere), and similar to Ai (gradually learning to view the world in a less cold and logical way), but I kind of want to save that for another post lmao
He is especially hard on Cecil because Cecil says & does whatever he wants, and everything still works out for him, which is a way of life that Camus can't imagine for himself at all (despite maybe wanting it?)
That he can realize this and eventually admit out loud, despite all his pride, is also one of my favorite things about him
Season 2 does hint at something, so that's pretty cool!
Side note, I really love that his theme in the new Oracle series is "Change," the melting of ice.
So what was the anime supposed to do??
Of course there's no way to show all this in a single episode or even during the runtime of the anime, and I never expected them to because the story is very surface-level (that goes for all characters).
It's just unfortunate since the anime is the most accessible and well-known utapri media in the western fandom, and the character's main episode is bound to leave the biggest impression.
I understand the choice of being laser-focused on the servant plotline, it's supposed to be funny (?) and waters him down to a trope that's easy to understand at first glance (the step-on-me guy I guess)
Still, I can't help but compare it to Ranmaru's episode, who was also hard to work with in the games but was chill in S3E7 and got to pet cats. Anime onlys will never know how much Camus loves to dote on his dog smh.....
#please don't take this too seriously#i just wanted to cry about camus#uta no prince sama#utapri#camus (utapri)#quartet night#cecil aijima#ranmaru kurosaki#reiji kotobuki#ai mikaze#tag for me yapping about utapri
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Okay finished the Haruspex route of Pathologic Classic! I need to play Clara's route to see the whole picture but I'm already fascinated by the differences between P1 and P2 in terms of characterization. I think I like Pathologic 2 even more now considering how they improved on Artemy's route, I am sorry to say I didn't like it at all in classic... This is all just my personal impression after first playthrough ofc. Ramblings about both Artemy and Daniil ↓ I think what bothered me about Haruspex was mostly just his attitude and his messiah plot. Once the first day is out of the way it's all smooth sailing for him, a bit too much so?? The only personal conflict he has is figuring out his father's exact wishes for him and choosing a sacrifice. Killing anyone is treated as fair or something that needed to happen and the Haruspex is always shrugging it off... And either option, Aglaya & the Town or Polyhedron... It just doesn't seem like he is that attached to either? So it doesn't feel like he is sacrificing much personally? Like sure he wants to save the Town because of his messianic qualities, but that's again more about fulfilling his 'role' rather than genuinely wanting to save lives, or at least it read that way to me. I'm sure it's meant to be both and P2 makes this far more apparent, but in P1 it elicited a rather squinty reaction from me. Plus well yeah, getting rid of Polyhedron is pretty much just ¯\_(ツ)_/¯, like yep he sure didn't care about that thing lmao so getting rid of it isn't such a difficult choice at all. The suggestion that the Polyhedron could be his Udurgh is kind of useless because the Town and Earth are far better candidates and fit with Kin beliefs better, which in this game Artemy pretty much doesn't doubt at all. Maybe this is why the Bachelor is so present in his route? Daniil did say he'd commit suicide if he lost, maybe we'd want to think twice about pushing him towards it... But again! Does it seem like this guy cares ahhh haha... The dialogue option that is actually engaging with what Daniil said is pretty much there to make it clear to the player what the Utopian ending is and what it would be like.
Ngl at first I thought he was meant to be the 'sacrifice' until they said it's a woman. Every time Artemy learned something about the Bachelor's motivations he'd write down in his diary like '...if it matters' since the player can always choose what ending to go with I guess. I also find it curious that he can say that they are friends but still always writing only 'the Bachelor' in his diaries while Daniil switched to 'Artemy' and 'Burakh' during the final stretch. The one-sided yaoi................ 🤔 At least Artemy doesn't get mad at him for ordering to set the mythic bull on fire, I guess their friendship did mean something to him after all at that point. Also when Capella tells him that he should ask the Bachelor for help with getting into the Polyhedron since the Bachelor 'fawns upon you a lot anyway' the Haruspex just goes 'oh yeah! ok' fjdghdjg... Now that I think about it I DID like the Haruspex route for what it did with the Bachelor hahah, his dialogues and letters are just so good sometimes. Like wow, I felt this.
Very cool, if i was Artemy I'd totally abandon my weird murderous calling for this. Tangentially related... P2 had one moment that I remember from my last replay when Rubin, if kept alive, falls into a deep deserved sleep in his home, and Artemy just starts emotionally monologuing at him.
Like, P1 Artemy would never, but also it goes to show that he's still very much a repressed man here too, buying into toxic masculinity ideals who can't just talk to his friends about his feelings directly... The same character, but more complex. I want to make it clear that I DO like him and his motivations in P2 actually, and his personal conflict being more about the future of the Kin makes that game much more powerful to me than what his classic route was. I heard that initially he was planned to be far more violent and dark, so maybe he could have been sort of a villain protagonist and this was changed later and this is why it feels a bit bland? Hmm... Idk this is fun to me because meanwhile the Bachelor didn't feel that different to me in both games lmao. A highly stressed educated guy who is just trying to prevent the spread of epidemic the 'right' way and then clinging to the only chance he has left to preserve both his ideals and his life. He is a bit less polite in P2 at first (while still very much helping by warding off Rubin) but then rather quickly becomes more cordial to Artemy and vice versa (and wow it sure is nice when Artemy can actually be polite and friendly..). And the moment when he explains some of his personal deal to Artemy feels rather similar in both iterations mood-wise.
I liked his route in P1 a lot, surprisingly so, and I now understand why so many people liked him before P2 came out and afterwards too... There's just something very real about how he is the intelligent Capital doctor but with an extraordinary dream to combat death itself, possibly given to him by the Powers That Be due to these children trying to cope with people dying around them. And instead of favoring him for it they hate him! They leave him with nothing but this final chance to fix things, even if that means destroying everything and rebuilding anew. Daniil's desperation feels very real and thus more compelling, plus like... I mean it's pretty much confirmed that it's not just the Polyhedron and that the soil itself is 'rotten' (literally in the meta real world and through blood beneath the earth in the Town itself) and the decease could return again, sooo his ending doesn't look that bad comparatively. I also appreciated how Maria (or uhh was it Nina talking through her here as well?) explained how their Utopia doesn't actually mean a 'perfect' place, more so just an impossible dream.
The Bachelor doesn't mind this at all, a detail I loved.
...Hmm that said maybe P1 makes it a little too easy for him to kinda ignore the Kin issue, he is only mad about their circumstances when it comes to Vlad choosing to doom thousands of the Kin workers inside the Termitary (which is just his doctor ethics). I mean it is realistic for him to ignore the implications of representing the imperialist side, he does mention his father was a military man too at some point I think... Still, he is very quick to accept the Kin's unique beliefs as something that has obvious merit, trusting the Haruspex with that side of things in both of their routes, and he doesn't make much of a distinction between them and regular Town people when it comes to patient treatment. If anything it's probably a sign of how the writers weren't thinking that hard about this worldbuilding aspect at the time... even if I appreciated them showing the downsides of the Kin's society, I think those were done better than in P2 purely because it was a bit more realistic (I am talking about sexism mostly, such as selling their own daughters and not respecting their autonomy, plus the mention of Kin politics and different ruling clans rather than the hive mind situation implied in P2). Like, it is more obvious in P1 that wholeheartedly embracing the Kin's return to tradition isn't such a good solution for them either, but one that will likely happen anyway with Artemy and Taya as their new leaders. And it could get trickier in Pathologic 3 I think, especially since most of us really appreciated the portrayal of colonization in P2 and would expect it getting addressed again in future games of other character routes, but we'll see I guess! Either way I look forward to that game a lot now.
#pathologic#patho1#daniil dankovsky#artemy burakh#the bachelor#the haruspex#RAMBLINGS again#long post#text
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Choices fandom appreciation shoutouts
This event is so so so lovely and I really want to join in hehe. I'm not great at expressing my thoughts/feelings and stuff but I really wanna try because I'm really thankful for all of u guys!! :)
When I first posted on this account last summer I honestly expected I'd probably post a few things and dip again because I usually don't get much attention on social media platforms. And also wasn't sure if anyone would really vibe with my approach to characters and stories hahaha 🙈.
But instead people were so nice and I felt so welcomed and like 'oh wow people seem to actually enjoy what I do??' And I had so much fun reading the tags left on reblogs of my art and stuff. And alongside that it has been soooo fun to see everyone elses posts and characters and leaving my thoughts on those as well (and slowly getting less shy about it too 💪). And I even started reading fanfic for the first time in my life hahaha.
I feel like I'm rambling but I just really want to say all this haha, it's been so fun being on here! I love drawing everyone's characters and other requests and will keep doing that (like pleeaase dont be shy, I love drawing everyone's characters) because it's fun and it's also kinda how I say 'thank you' for all being so nice to me!! So yeah thank you all for making me feel so welcome the past months! :)
Especially as someone who usually has trouble making friends and putting myself out there due to shyness it means a lot!
Under the cut I'll also put some messages directed at separate people, I'm fighting the lil voice in my head that's shy about this but you guys all deserve to hear it hehe, even if I'm kinda ass at expressing myself like this
But even if not mentioned/tagged I appreciate everyone who supports me/my work so much and I love seeing you guys in my notes!!
@lovealexhunt In the short time I've been here I've noticed you do so much for people and this fandom! I've loved all the fics you wrote that I read so far and love how you write Mal and Daenarya together (and the vampire au OOOO). She's so fun and I loved drawing her interacting with Ripley and will definitely do it again sometime!! And I'm also still so obsessed with the geometric Ripley art and I thought it was so sweet of you to draw that for me aaaa
@lilyoffandoms I always love seeing your art on my tumblr feed and your designs for your mc's!! And I'm still sooo in love with the Ripley drawing you did and that really made my day back then because it was a total surprise too!! In general all the art you've done of my characters has just been awesome and made my day every time!!
@choicesmc I love what you do with all your mc's, when you make picrews for them, the artworks I've seen you do for them and all the info you share about them, you're so so creative!! I love all your writing a lotttt, especially the shorter ones you've been posting lately!! I rly enjoy talking to you in dm's a lot, if it ever seems like I don't it's just me being shy haha 😭. I also love the tags you leave when you reblog my art and when you point out stuff you notice :)
@sapphoschoices Thank you for so often sharing my posts!! And in general always supporting people and sharing their work! I love all the edits I've seen you do and hope you'll keep sharing more hehe. I also read a fic by you for the first time last week and really enjoyed it! Made me wanna replay Desire & Decorum..
@rosesnink Thank you for letting me borrow your mc's a few times when I wanted to draw interactions! I had so so much fun writing back and forth about Rex and Brienne after I posted the art of them together hehe, I always love to see other people with orc mc's in general. I also really like the gif edits you make and your fics I've read so far!
@aria-ashryver You were one of the first people in the fandom who started sharing and commenting on my art and thanks to that I ended up not just posting a few things and dipping forever like I expected hahah. I always really enjoy reading through the tags you leave on the art I post!! I finally caught up to SICSIG a while ago and it was sooo fun seeing what you did with Immortal Desires and all the extra lore and stuff and I can so clearly tell so much love went into it. And your sprite edits are also always so amazing aaaa.
@cadybear420 Thank you for often sharing my posts I really appreciate it hehe. And thank you for letting me draw your mc's a few times, I had sm fun with it haha. And it was really fun talking about Ripley and Evie interactions. I really enjoy your edits, you're so skilled aaa!! I also enjoy reading about your mc's a lot + how you write gnc characters and gnc m×f romance.
@gaiuskamilah I loveeee your art a lot and love seeing it on my feed!! I also really enjoy reading your thoughts on books, characters, themes in books etc. You make me wanna replay BloodBound so bad (and I definitely will do that soon)
@hsslilly-blog I'm sooo obsessed with your art you have no idea. You're rly funny and I rly enjoy seeing your posts on my feed. I really really love how you write characters, like they just feel so real, it's super inspiring!
@mydemonsdrivealimo I really really enjoy your art and everything you share about Jensen and Bryce. You're like The Bryce Mutual to me, anything you say about him is basically canon to me lol. Thank you for letting me draw Jensen a while ago it was SO fun aaaa
@peonyblossom
Thank you for the cover redraw ideas you sent when I asked for ideas, I had sooo much fun drawing the Alpha cover with Kalani and Channing!! I enjoy the bits you share about your mc's and oc's a lot too!
@choicesfandomappreciation
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I love my WoW characters
I feel like showing off some of my World of Warcraft characters and the family connections I made up
Warning, this post gets really long when you open it up, mostly because of the pictures
Starting off is my main Slgery, a Night Elf hunter
she is beauty, she is grace, she can definitely punch me in the face. She is the matriarch of the family I guess.
Next is her wife and my main during BFA; Sigery, a Worgen druid
She is actually the only one with a name; Riley Hayfields because I made her in the sims (though long before the werewolf pack). She is a feral druid, mostly because the idea of a dog woman spending majority of her time as a cat amused me.
Then here's their three adopted daughters
FaeOfCute, a Worgen rogue and the oldest
WildOfCute the middle child is a Worgen hunter (like Mama)
SpellOfCute is the baby of the family that decided she would rebel as a Worgen warlock.
This is the centralized family but there are some other relatives too.
Slgery's aunts are a wise old Night Elf priest called FaithOfCute
and the more chaotic one is EvilSigery (I regret that name so much), a Night Elf demon hunter delighted to find out she has living family after all
She was probably a sentinel before she devoted herself to Illidan and his cause. Oddly enough, she also found love during the legion invasion in my Light Forged Draenei, BrightNight
For a race that hates demons so much, it's kind of ironic she loves a woman with demonic blood. They do argue like an old married couple at times but don't insult the other in one's presence or you will end up on the wrong side of a very sharp weapon.
FaithOfCute isn't dating anyone right now but she does remain good friends with her ex, WithoutSoul, a Void Elf monk
She was originally a High Elf rogue before she became a Void Elf, then she became a monk to help her inner peace against the dark voices whispering to her. Just some backstory for her... and she has a cool lightsaber blade despite supposedly fighting with her fists.
FaithOfCute's other ex is on a bit shakier grounds, but they did rediscover a friendship during the legion invasion, Horde!Slgery is a Blood Elf demon hunter
She was a bit lost after everything that went down and losing Illidan. She didn't have anyone really to help her. She took some time to find herself, eventually 'adopting', as much as you can adopt an adult, two young women. Horde!WildOfCute is a Mag'har Orc hunter that also felt lost after leaving her home on Draenor.
Though at least she had her life long companion Arfther.
The other young woman was DinoOfCute, a Zandalari Troll druid she met during the 4th war.
Despite being very opposite in everything but stubbornness, the two just clicked.
I feel very bad that I kind of skipped over my Gnome mage, TnyButDeadly
She is a longtime friend of Slgery (and Sigery)'s family. She is less of an aunt, probably closer to a sassy cousin. She seems very stoic until you get to know her though, then you got a handful (get it, handful because gnomes are small) of pure sass and snark.
Final one I want to touch on is my new character, Sigerthyr, a Dracthyr Evoker
Her personality is still underdevelopment since she only has a few hours of playtime, mostly just the starting area. She will probably remain mostly in her dragonic form, but I did make her visage pretty
I have like a dozen more characters, but these were my favorite/most relevant to the 'lore'
#WoW#Long post#just me talking about my characters in WoW#did they need to be interconnected no but I do what I want
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Welcome to the Dungeons of Fear and Hunger.
#Fear and Hunger#D'arce Cataliss#Cahara#Ragnvaldr#Enki Ankarian#Unlike Dungeon Meshi - I cannot in good faith recommend this game to a broad audience.#My background with F&H goes as follows: I am hanging out with a friend. He says “hey try this game I've been playing.” I say “Okay!”#I have never heard of this game. I pick the mercenary. I go through 5 min of character history and background. I am mauled to death by dogs#It took me 4 resets to even get in the dungeon. But I finally get there. I am caught by a guard. He cuts off all but one of my limbs#I am forced to crawl around in a blood and corpse pit until the game tells me 'give up idiot'.#I reset. I am mauled by dogs again. I realize this is not for me but I am intrigued enough to go home and watch some playthroughs#And WOW what an interesting game it is! I really do appreciate games that blend their design philosophy with the theme it wants to set#This is a game about fear and hunger. And persevering. And penis (my god is there a lot of penis)#I recommend this to people who like extremely challenging games and can handle the many *content warnings* within this series#If the idea of Bloodborne/eldenring and undertale having a little RPG maker baby sounds appealing to you - give it a shot#It's made by ONE GUY and it's a great horror game. I am just really bad at it.#My friends just enjoy putting me in situations where I scream and yell. We don't talk about the corn mazes. Or the other horror game nights#Apparently I'm funny when I'm Scared!#As people who follow me on twitter might know; I am deep in the pits of this series right now. I will be back with more art.
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Rook: I'm really worried about Davrin and Lucanis, they keep arguing with one another... Its very bad Varric, what if it effects them in battle?
Varric, remembering that one time Fenris broke Ander's nose then took a knife in the back for him in the same night: I'm sure they'll be fine kid. They're barely even arguing if you ask me
#dragon age#dav spoilers#sorry its so funny to me#varric hearing the veilguard talk about their problems like adults instead of fucking/drinking/fighting their way out of it:#'wow my kirkwall friends really were fucked up losers huh:#'* whoops#i wish veilguard cast was a little bit toxic... i need them to be mean#lucanis should hate me so much more for choosing minrathous over treviso#i was counting on the yummy character drama...#he does trust rook a little bit less cause of it though so ill take that#i do feel bad about treviso im already planning a crow rook to save it and romance lucanis#sorry to compare these two to fenris and anders again i just think its funny#they should let me stick anders in the middle of the lighthouse#his sheer inability to cope with shit in a healthy way would be like setting off another bomb#someone tries to applogize and anders starts on his Bullshit you know what I'm talking about#can you guys tell i miss him. hes so bad at coping babygirl come back to me...#crow rambles
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okay, wow, uhhhh, apparently my comment section Yearns for me to do some mean-spirited unfair goofy dunking, lol.
here's the Cliff's Notes version, as a compromise between What The People Desire and The Spirit Remaining Relatively Inert In Me. there's probably not much new here if you already saw me yell about Chambers and/or Mishima over on Dreamwidth, but here we go!
(for context, the only Chambers i've read is A Long Way to a Small Angry Planet (henceforth referred to as ALWtaSAP). i've read Mishima's entire Sea of Fertility tetralogy plus The Temple of the Golden Pavilion.)
((SPEAKING OF WHICH: this is Total Desperation Hours, but if anyone reading this has read the entirety of the Sea of Fertility tetralogy, SLIDE INTO MY DMs IMMEDIATELY, I WISH TO TALK TO YOU AT GREAT LENGTH. SPECIFICALLY I WISH TO TALK ABOUT KEIKO AND THE FUCKING CHRISTMAS PARTY IN BOOK 4. i have only ever met one other human who read the whole thing & it was at a mediocre taco bar & i was so overcome with ECSTASY and WONDERMENT at finally getting to talk about THAT FUCKING SCENE that i accidentally doused all my tacos in far too much hot sauce to be even remotely edible, but i ate them anyway because i didn't want the conversation to end, and i suffered so hard for that but. it was so worth it. ))
anyway.
the lazy handwave-y case for "ALWtaSAP is fascist actually":
the way the narrative treated Corbin in ALWtaSAP REALLY bothered me, right?
all the other crew members in the book have very Nice™ interpersonal skills, and would flawlessly succeed in any corporate Crucial Conversations training...
...whereas Corbin is kind of a dick, has rough edges, and would absolutely get reported to HR for generally having a bad attitude, etc...
...but the narrative treats this as, instead of an instance of Normal Human Variation... well, it's treated as a profound and intractable moral failing.
it's treated this way to the point where, when Corbin's life is in peril, the whole group makes it clear they're only rescuing him out of their own magnanimity, not because he's, y'know, a fucking human worthy of consideration. he *deserves* to get fucked over for the "being a clone" thing or whatever, and it's implied to be related to his garbage personality (even though his personality has absolutely nothing to do with his predicament!)
first off: gross! even if you don't accept my mean-spirited "let's link this back to fascism" argument, it still sucks bigtime.
but you're here for me to kick hornets' nests, so:
you know how, e.g. the recent film The Zone of Interest portrayed the nice "domestic" side of nazi official life? there's that whole "herrenvolk retaking the countryside" meme, right. certainly one of the most visible fash aesthetics is Violent Masculinity and Glorious Battle and what-the-fuck ever, but... "tradwives preserving Family Values in peaceful farm-y settings" is a pretty essential part of the whole ideology too. Hedwig is just as much as complicit as Rudolf. you could perhaps call this the "soft"/"femme" side of fascism. which is lazy and hand-wavy and reductionist but here we go
so okay, ALWtaSAP is the soft/femme side of fascism. the entire narrative is very DOMESTIC, but like, Zone of Interest was very domestic too, right. there's a very thin veneer of queer-friendliness over it—the interspecies relationships/gay characters/etc are in fact considered Totally Fine... but the narrative makes it SO clear if you're not Nice and Interpersonally Polite in exactly the correct ways, they actually do view you as a bad person.
and, like, fascist ideology absolutely has carve-outs for "this is fine if you do it in Exactly The Correct Way," right. like, Intense Homoeroticism Between Manly Dudes is certainly a thing in fascism, as we'll get to in a bit. which doesn't make fascism queer-friendly, obv, but it makes it friendly to someone who's queer in exactly the right kind of heavily circumscribed way and God Forbid You Step Off That Path Slightly Or Piss Off The Wrong Guy
(isn't it weird how the entire crew of that fucking ship, sans Corbin, never seems to display any real interpersonal unpleasantness? how convenient for all of them. how fucking convenient. wonder what would happen if any of them did do anything to fall outside the Tightly-Prescribed Ideal Of Domesticity. they replaced "make babies" with "be nice to found family" but whatever it has the same vibe)
anyway yeah, i think that's sort of fucked! (especially given that, y'know, plenty of Real Actual Queer People are in fact not nice in exactly the correct ways but that doesn't make them less people or someone you get to jettison, etc)
you could push back against this argument by pointing out that these attitudes—(interpersonal Niceness, broad tolerance for certain types of non-normative activity so long as they can be rendered Legible, etc)—are more neoliberal-y than fash-y in nature. and you'd probably be right! i'm not much of a theory girl, haha. i would have to actually read some literature instead of just vibes-ing it if i wanted to make this anything more than a particularly spicy Vice article. but this is just a spicy Vice article, so....
...though, come to think of it, let's further bolster the "actually it's fascism" case: remember that bit in ALWtaSAP where Corbin "cures" Ohan?
brief recap for those who (wisely) bleached this book from their memory: Ohan is an alien whose culture revolves around the "Whisper," a virus that exclusively infects Ohan's species. if you get infected by the Whisper, you get much-enhanced intelligence plus the ability to pilot spacecraft (via enhanced reactions/reflexes/Knowledge Of Complex Space-Math or something)... but your lifespan is also drastically reduced. Ohan likes being infected by a Whisper very much; he was given full knowledge of the virus's effects prior to being infected; he understands it reduces his lifespan but is still happy just the way he is.
so, near the end of the book, Corbin just... non-consensually administers the cure to Ohan & kills the virus? lmao?? and everyone yells at Corbin a bit, but also the narrative does seem to lowkey endorse this as The Correct Outcome; now Ohan will get to live much longer!!! everyone agrees that's Good and Correct, right!!! like sure there WAS a moral dilemma here, but we gave The Evil Action to our Designated Shitbag, so now all the Good characters can just enjoy the good results of his bad action.
again: this is a huge part of Ohan's species's culture! they have a whole religion built around this shit! and the narrative just kinda endorsed... y'know... robbing him of that? on the basis of bodily integrity/purity...?
you see where i'm going with this, right. You Know Who Else Is Obsessed With Bodily Integrity/Purity? that's right it's the fascists lol
anyway.
the argument for "Yukio Mishima is the Macho/Hard/Manly side of fascism"... i think that case writes itself lol? uhhhh, lmk if i need to spell that one out, because i sure CAN blather on about Mishima at exhausting length, but i'm pretty sure i don't need to lol. like, i love me some Spring Snow just as much as the next bitch, and i don't think "damn this dude was fashy as hell" is the only reading you can do (particularly wrt Spring Snow, it's really interesting to think of it as a reimagining of the Tale of Genji story with modern sensibilities, its relationship to 18th-century romanticism, etc), but like... dude does make it pretty incontrovertibly clear that Heroic Violent Action Is The Only Way To Save Your Nation And/Or Yourself, the aesthetics are very Sexy Murder Poet, the books' absolute contempt for fragility/age/weakness are pretty clear, in book 3 whenever he's writing a female character you desperately wish he'd just go back to the universe where Everyone Is A Dude And Also Very Gay For Each Other, because while that universe was obviously also sexist you at least didn't need to read whole passages about how much of a bitch Honda's wife is for *checks notes* having a kidney condition... uhhh i'm losing the plot here somewhat lol. let me know if i need to go pluck some books off the shelf
anyway @bogfox @radicarian @spiralingintocontrol @pretty-rage-machine @vintar @midori-verte , as requested, that's the Take lol
"the work of Becky Chambers and Yukio Mishima are two sides of the same fascist coin" is a Take that would be mean-spirited & kinda unfair & extremely goofy, but... i do think i could pull it off. if the spirit so moved me.
it might be too niche of a comparison to actually piss someone off, tho, & if i went to all the work of kicking the hornet's nest only to hear a faint buzz in return then what was the point
#obligatory If You Enjoyed Chambers That's Fine And That Doesn't Make You A Fascist.#it does mean i don't like the book you like tho sorry about that lol#(i'm a weird jerk with Very Specific Tastes don't take it personally)#(you can dunk on me for stanning for FFXV's storyline as True Art that's fair game)
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Can u draw paper and yin being best buds
Day 16
#inanimate insanity#ii#yin ii#yinyang ii#yin#yin yang#paper#paper ii#daily yin#WOAH ! my favorite character and my favorite characters to draw ! wow nuta did a lot for this !#I love thinking about their dynamic#I specifically kept thinking about how yin would just babble to paper nonstop at the complaint desk#paper would appreciate that it’s a break.#and someone genuinely wants to talk to him#funny enough I was going to draw yin charring a bunch of hotel supplies cause he’s VERY strong#but paper is ALSO very strong#they’re very cute#I need to think about them more thank you for this ask specifically#it’s like it was made for me#evil paper ii#I FORGOT TO TAG HIM OOPS I LOVE YOU SORRY
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I made a few new wax seal stamps out of clay (like the ones I did for my worldbuilding stuff forever ago), this time just of random symbols that I thought might look good done in the style of painting over the raised part of the wax or etc. :0c Some of them aren't carved deep enough to really show up that well, but overall they worked okay for being clay lol
#wax seal#crafts#wax stamp#stationery#Window one is kind of stinky.. I was imagining like a swirly night sky sort of looking thing so it would be a surreal contrast of a night#sky with a window in the middle that shows a daytime sky - but the silver and purple wax kind of mixed too much together#with the black and it just looks very plain black and not all that starry or anything hjbhj.. Of course the eye is probably my favorite#since all I ever do is draw eyes and still like eye imagery for some reason. The four leaf clover is very lumpy and skrunkty but also it wa#the smallest in size out of all of them so was easier to do multiple stamps of just to try it out.#The heart with eyes wax is actually more swirly in person. I wanted it to be a mix of light pink and red and white. and the wax#did kind of all blend together but in person you can definitely see MORE of the intentional swirlyness. in this it just looks plain pink.#I was going to do one eye in the heart but it looked weird. but now two seems too plain. i could have done 3?? in a pattern.. hmm#alas. I wish I could make actual metal ones. With the clay i have to paint them in a thin layer of olive oil before stamping because#otherwise the wax just kind of gets stuck in the grooves of the clay and then you can't pull it up. Very wacky ''unprofessional'' looking#set up where I'm hot gluing circles of sculpey clay to short stumps of a wooden dowel that I sawed apart with a serrated bread knife#and then using an old paintbrush to put olive oil on them whilst holding a spoon over a yankee candle flame hjbjh#ANYWAY.. I think if I were middle class/rich/etc. this would be one of the main things in my crafting room is like.. SO many colors#of wax. and all different custom made stamps designed by me. which could be much more elaborate in actual metal.. muahaha.... >:)c#RHGghhh... I actually don't want to talk much about it since (this is probably just my Obsessed With My Own World Artist Delusions) I#think I have a really cool idea for a game that could genuinely be successful if i ever get to make it and I don't want to give#everything away and spoil the whole plot/concept in hopes that one day I can actually do it - BUT - a game that I'd like to make after the#visual novel I'm making now has partially to do with the main character working as a sort of writer/scribe/artist assistant in an elven#city (set in my world/with my worldbuilding species and versions of elves and etc) and I was thinking of maybe incorporating#somehow being able to collect little writing type items like these like.. you can get different wax seal patterns or pens or etc. when I do#stuff like this in Real Life it always makes me think of that like.. ouh... this is good research.. what it shall be like to be a littol#elf collecting wax seals and such.. indeed... GRR i need to be finished with my current game NOWWW... i MUST work on other#thingss... aughh... ANYWAY.. yay. accomplishment to do One Single Thing other than Sit In The Summer Heat And Rot#though also hilarious as this was the first cool-ish day that was below 80F in a while hgvh#waking up like 'wow.. i actually feel okay today?? like I could do things?? how mysterious.. I wonder why..?? :0'' Its The Weather You Fool#Tis Always The Weather
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live drama adaptations part 2 (prev)
cast reveal and girls movie night 🔥
#i actually had the first three pages done for like. months now. and then i just forgot 🧍♂️#theres one more part to this but as to when ill finish that. haha#duck scribbles#minicomic tag#midoyuzu#and a bit of tomohaji on the side#doodles#enstars#midori takamine#hajime shino#yuzuru fushimi#tori himemiya#ibara saegusa#this is. a lot better quality than the first initial one amsdkjgshdgsmd i kindaa wanna redo it but its already a multiple part one i dont#think ill do that to myself rn akjdgskjwkjgjkd#its been 8 months i doubt anyone would remember the initial one but its ok u dont have to read it#i completely made up this manga and am now a little sad its not a thing that exists#i wish haruno was a real character i could post mangacaps of#thought too hard about it and there isnt any way to fit it into here but there is also a fourth character harunos childhood gyaru friend#also in love w her. she ends up having some sort of alliance with naoto but obviously its in vain too but its all chill#manga ends with haruno opening her dream cafe and asahi later joins her there after training a new team to take care of their old one#naoto becomes a regular there also w his new bf :] happy ending !!!#wow i have drawn Way too much lately. forgive me for such behavior ill probably be posting a lot less from here on out askjdgksjhgs#needed the food for when im away from my laptop for a week....#guess ill never get to finish that other lil comic i had planned for that sleepover drawing i made back during rarepair week </3#does anyone actually read these anyhow. i talk too much maybe
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Hawke's party is not a found family. There's no found family at all in series, in best we had friends, in worst inq's party.
Like the only reason why our party talked to each other was Hawke. Hawke was the key (badumtss) this "found family" existed, they didn't give a fuck about each other beside Hawke AND THAT WAS WONDERFUL
Anders cheering when giving Fenris to Danarius? Perfect, I love this man, headcanon he could accidentally kill my Hawke after game
Isabella and Aveline catfight? Beautiful, I love you girls, call me when you will start blood
Varric mocking Hawke on rivalry path? Wow, I missed you after pacified boring versions of dai and dav
They weren't found family, but they I could feel them as characters through their worst. Exactly because they hated each other and prioritised their own problems and Hawke could do the same. That's the problem with veilguard. If you're nice and acceptable with everyone, you're friend to no one. You just try to be liked by everyone and that's boring, that's making me want to yell on Bellara just to make her cry like it was with Merrill or tell Harding to stop whine like we could with Alistair. I don't want to be friends with everyone, I want to be friendly with those who deserved that and make a nightmare of life of chars that didn't deserve my love.
Oooh, yeah, such a nice family it was, Belz. A family where you made fun of Anders for trying to help the mages by saying that "Justice doesn't exist outside his head"? A family where you made weird comments about sexually abused former slave and tried to guess the color of his underwear? A family where Aveline called you a "whore"/"slut" and in return you called her "man-chin" or a "prudish man-virgin"?
A family where Hawke literally gave you to Arishok or you run away, leaving Hawke to pick up the pieces?!??
'k lmao
Also this armor is fucking hideous, Isabela was already oversexualized yet somehow bioware made it worse than a bunch of straight men in 2011 how do you even do that?
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"rhaenys could have ended the war by dracarysing all the greens right there" yes because a distant relation to the throne deciding to barbecue an anointed and publicly positively hailed king and his entire family who is well loved within the city and in multiple other parts of the country for the sake of the succession of a far-away princess no one was ever on board with who hasn't been seen by the populace in literal years, her psycho husband, her three obvious bastards, and two toddlers from the psycho husband would go over super well with westeros and especially in king's landing where scores of the still-cheering population were killed for no reason by that same dragon who would do the barbecuing, because when targaryens act unilaterally without thinking of how the people would react there's never any problem, which is why the storming of the dragonpit and robert's rebellion were actually just collective delusions dreamed up by readers who hate rhaenyra and not key parts of the story and house targaryen's history that directly contributed to their demise and are intrinsic to the plot
truly team black stans are made up of only the most genius and media literate amongst us
#personal#house of the dragon#anti team black#i mean i guess??#like the crowd was cheering for aegon HARD#and they were always on board with aegon#and the hightowers are a powerful house with a lot of allies#and alicent and helaena specifically were well loved by the people in king's landing and the realm at large#and none of them ever liked rhaenyra or daemon who again have been MIA for basically a decade already#and again targaryens overreaching their power and not taking the people into account#is the reason why their house fell into oblivion and now rests entirely on a FIFTEEN YEAR OLD GIRL WHO IS THE ONLY ONE LEFT#if she roasted the dais the mob wouldn't have even let her leave they'd have killed her and meleys both in a heartbeat#storming of the dragonpit but a couple months earlier#the thing to remember is that i think a lot of team black stans are just kinda stupid#and do not care about the story at all or the actual intricacies of the world and its politics that is so important to the dance#(remember the rumors of rhaenyra mistreating helaena and alicent literally led to rhaenyra's death)#(because it led to the mobs and the storming of the dragonpit and the death of joffrey and her being driven out)#(and thus having to go to dragonstone where sunfyre got a little meal out of the whole debacle good for him)#(along with all of her ten million other shitty political decisions)#how do you profess to be pro-targaryen without even knowing targaryen history and where they erred and how that ended them#like *i* like the targaryens you guys have heard me talk about the conquerors all the livelong day#but i am also smart and i understand the world george created and the concept of repercussions#anyway yeah i am Annoyed at that new daemon clip (wow what a shock something annoyed me and had daemon in it)#(my least favorite character who could have foreseen this)
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ONE: ok guys here’s an arc about mob, in his growth as a person, being confronted with an ideology he’s unfamiliar with, and he has to learn from it but also understand why it’s unhealthy and bad to properly grow from it and choose kindness in the end, albeit in a more nuanced way than before, and this will make mob more able to confront later problems in the season that can’t be solved with mere kindness and require a deep understanding of loneliness and solitude, something he hasn’t had much room to speak on until now. To express mob being shown this villain’s ideology we have a sequence where we see how mogami views the world and by extension how he sees mob, by putting mob in the kind of sad fucked up world he thinks exists, but mob will overcome it with the knowledge that in the real world he has people he cares about and that even the people who make the world bad sometimes can change and nobody is a static evil and kindness and courage when you’re going through hardship goes a long way. despite the darkness this is ultimately a very uplifting experience for him and a show that life is always more than its darkest moments, and also how picking yourself up instead of wallowing in your own suffering and trauma is hard but a very courageous act and what makes mob stronger than mogami
mp100 fans with tunnel vision: Oh so mob was tortured for six months and is sad? He’s literally so sad and traumatized and nobody is talking about this?
#babbles#mp100#decided to nab an old discord message for Post Purposes#BC i love mogami arc but god the Fandom Mogami Arc™️ where it’s all just#Evil Mogami Sad Mob Whump Look How Sad Why Aren’t We Talking About This!!!#makes me SEE RED. MY GOD#fandoms when characters experience trauma and get takeaways from it that aren’t looking into the camera to go#Wow That Was So Sad I Am Traumatized And Sad Now#I Am So Sad And Must Acknowledge My Trauma By Suffering And Never Growing#and of course coming back to one of my biggest fandom pet peeves which is viewing characters exclusively as People#like mob is so so so dear to me he’s one of my top ccs i care about him so so much#but he’s not a real child being bullied who needs like. counseling. his trauma served a purpose in the story and#dwelling on it was not that purpose!
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POOR GABRIEL MONTEZ! YOU NEVER SAW THIS COMING DID YOU? ALL YOU WANTED WAS POWER. SECURITY. SAFETY. & THATS EXACTLY WHAT YOU GOT! JUST IN EXCHANGE FOR YOUR BODY. LETS JUST HOPE NO ONE FUCKS THIS UP. LETS JUST HOPE YOU WONT HAVE TO CLEAN UP THE MESS.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#cw gore#jrwi suckening spoilers#jrwi suckening#jrwi gabriel#jrwi gabriel montez#LOOK FAMILIAR?hahahahahDONT WORRY#IM REUPLOADING THIS HERE BC i fixed up the drawing a lil. and also i wanted to add main tags#U WONT SEE ANY DIFFERENCES BETWEEN THISSUN N THE POST ON MY SIDEBLOG.i changed the image there too.HA!!!!!!!#ANYWAY.i rambled plenty about pain and gabe on my sideblog.SO LETS TALK ABT THE ART SHALL WE.ihad i very hard time getting the colors down#would u believe i nearly left this uncolored??FUCKED UP!! it was only a sketchhow did it end up like this. it was only a sketch...#BUT IM RLY GLAD I WENT W COLORING IT.this time i actually used the airbrush n pencil tools BUT i also have a handy dandy brush i made#its just the mspaint air brush tool. fucking LOVE THAT THING. but now its in fire alpaca and it can be slightly transparent.IT LOOKS SOGOOD#perfect for splatters and grime.i love you mspaint i love youuu.im also so happy w the blood here.i think i reached a shift last year#back when i made that genloss fanart something abt the way i draw blood finally CLICKED and im like OH. the inside must always be darker.#like i KNEW that already but it was like my hand itself finally had it click.i wonder what i will learn next?I LIKE THE ORGANS HERE TOO#not as veiny or thready as i usually draw em. but i think thats fine. not as WET as id like em to be but thats also fine.#i got the point across. the point ofc being WOW THIS IS GRUESOME AND PAINFUL AND TERRIBLE#I LOVE HIS EXPRESSION.i love pain and thinking abt pain. you lose yourself to it after enough time passes of just being in an ocean o agony#at one point its just too tiresome to scream or writhe. theres a point when the body accepts it.sometimes.atleast.#OHHH GABRIEL AS A CHARACTER DELIGHTS ME SO MUCH.he is a dog to me.a thing to serve others.I WISH I KNEW MORE#WHAT ELSE DID YOU WANT BOY?? SURE POWER AND SECURITY AND SAFETY ARE NICE.BUT DID YOU HAVE DREAMS? WANTS? PASSIONS?#WHAT WAS THE STORY BEHIND THAT TIGER TATTOO ON YOUR ARM?WHAT DO THE DOGTAGS SAY BOY?I WISH I COULD HAVE TEA W U#OHHH TO SIT DOWN WITH A CHARACTER AND JUST SPEAK TO THEM. AND YET. AND YET IN THE END ITS ALL TRAGEDY AND COMEDY#TRAGEDY AND COMEDY THAT IS SO SO PAINFULLY UNBALANCED. SIGH.#WHATEVER CMERE BOY YOURE BECOMING AN OC OF MINE NOW UR GONNA BE IN SPACE AND UR NAME IS GONNA BE VINEGAR#UR STILL GONNA BE SHIP OF THESEUSED THOUGH. OOOHHH GABRIEEELLL GABRIEL MONTEEEZZZ#HOW MANY PEOPLE WERE BUILT INTO YOU.HOW MANY DID YOU LOVE AND CHERISH.HOW MANY TATTOOS DO U RECOGNIZE ON UR NEW ARMS#WHAT WAS IT LIKE? ON THE NIGHT U WERE SIRED?WERE YOU EXCITED? DID YOU SEE YOUR BOSS' FACE?WHAT WAS THIS PROMOTION LIKE?
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